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#but it was also his imagination that was always his weapon
kissmguts · 2 days
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I saw you said requests are open and thought I’d send one! (Can I be 🦙anon?? If that isn’t taken by someone else!)
Imagine being Aiden’s sibling (and Ben’s cousin) and dating Tyler. Like just what that’d be like? And also had a thought like I could just see happening with being Aiden’s sibling and dating Tyler 💀.
But like Aiden always unintentionally stopping them from kissing?? Even just a simple kiss on the cheek because he keeps unintentionally interrupting/making it awkward every time. Even funnier if they have yet to have a first kiss and Aiden keeps unintentionally stopping it from happening without realizing?? 😭💀
SO FAR, SO CLOSE
author's note : you can be llama anon (i love ur brain)
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concept : being aiden’s sibling AND tyler’s gf? genre : headcanons content : curse words, you’re involved with the phantom world stuff
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⠀ › ⠀being aiden’s sibling meant handling annoying situations ⠀ › ⠀growing up, aiden was unintentionally your “patience trainer” ⠀ › ⠀unless you have the same personality as him (which would be way worse than the phantom world, you guys would be the cause of world destruction) ⠀ › ⠀dating tyler at the same time meant dealing with both their bullshit ⠀ › ⠀tyler does try to keep it cool, he doesn’t wanna bother you by shit talking your own brother ⠀ › ⠀tyler gets all “aiden was such a… rascal! he was being so!” he would pause to use the right words ⠀ › ⠀gets irritated when aiden interrupts your kisses to the point he literally accuses aiden of doing it on purpose ⠀ › ⠀”i swear you’re trying to start a fight!” tyler complained ⠀ › ⠀“what happened?” aiden scratched his cheek with a dumb smile ⠀ › ⠀tyler would sometimes blurt out cursewords at aiden “you dumb #### i will #### you! i swear to god!” ⠀ › ⠀at some point tyler would have actually yelled at aiden “i can’t even kiss my own girlfriend because of your lemon-headed ass always having to be everywhere!” ⠀ › ⠀like the twins, it was some unspoken rule to aiden that you wouldn't leave his sight unless you're just in your room chilling.
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bonus:
⠀ › ⠀absolute chaos in the phantom world honestly. ⠀ › ⠀tyler would check on his sister and you first, obviously ⠀ › ⠀when tyler would save you from a phantom, he would heavily breathe and ask “you okay?” with his weapon up (blushing n kicking my feet) ⠀ › ⠀aiden would smile at this and kill the next phantom before tyler could and ask you “you okay?” before giggling ⠀ › ⠀tyler’s eye would literally be twitching and the others would have to remind them about the serious situation ⠀ › ⠀so many situations where they exchange “that’s my sibling!” and “that’s my girlfriend!” ⠀ › ⠀whenever you are going out on a date with tyler, aiden would come with you to “drop you off” ⠀ › ⠀you could feel the tension when aiden says goodbye with that eat-shitting grin on his face
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raisedbythetv89 · 2 days
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joss's sick obsession with not just causing pain and suffering - but punishment and humiliation to his "pretty popular girl" archetype characters aka Buffy and Cordelia and his favoritism of the most horrible mediocre white men aka riley, xander, and angel is never more apparent than in Into the Woods
The writers opted not for the FANTASTIC call back to season 1 with owen and Never Kill a Boy on the First Date when Buffy says "two days in my world and owen really would get himself killed…. or I'd get him killed… or someone else...."
which set them up perfectly for the road map of Buffy's attempt at a "normal" relationship that angel, her mother, and the scoobies keep trying to push her to have (when she's not normal herself so of course it's gonna be a disaster which is soooooo trying to force a queer person to be straight coded which is why spuffy is inherently queer on top of them both being canonically bisexual because Buffy embracing her love of Spike is embracing her inherent queerness)
But could you IMAGINE how amazing it would have been for season 1 to have foreshadowed riley being turned at the suck house (because literally all that evil in Sunnydale and NO ONE takes the opportunity to turn the slayer's boyfriend into the perfect secret weapon to take her and her whole family out??? PLEASE)
Then vamp riley almost killing Dawn and her mother (because Dawn would be the one tricked into inviting him in as a call back to Dawn accidentally inviting Harmony in and Buffy saying she's gonna get us all killed plus angel tricking his little sister into inviting him in once he was turned)
Buffy is forced to kill him after pleading with him to remember he loves her or any part of who he was (which would further show how exceptional Spike's ability to form a truce with Buffy, keep it, and fall in love with her all without a soul is)
Making riley her second (third if we count ford being left for dead and then having to dust him) turned evil boyfriend she's forced to kill.
Buffy would still be DEVASTATED and it's Buffy so she'd still punish and blame herself even though it'd be all riley's fault (demonstrating how this storyline would still cause immense pain for Buffy and be very high stakes drama for the plot but again joss elected for humiliation having Buffy literally chase after the man who was cheating on her with vampires while she was dealing with a sick mother and a hell god after her sister. Favoring a white man's character over the best plot line)
All while also further setting up her and Spike's relationship because of the "if that's what I wanted I'd be dating Spike" of it all which was her basically saying if I didn't want normal, Spike would be who I'd choose and now she's tried to be normal and he got killed, almost killed her family and then she had to kill him just like season 1 Buffy knew would happen when she broke things off with owen!!
AND the poetic irony of her trying to be “normal” and it ends with the exact same result?? The lesson being that rejecting who you are is not the answer and the only true answer is self acceptance because pain will happen no matter what so might as well love and embrace yourself ???
BUT NOOOOOOO the writers aka joss opted for riley's narrative to be that he's a hero and a good guy always, no matter what because joss has a big fat crush on marc and guys like him, angel and oz all get written off by treating women like shit without being villainized for it at all and then leaving. Getting to go on to live rich and fulfilling lives while Kendra, Tara, Cordy, and Anya are all violently killed off with barely any time spent grieving their deaths by more than one character..... (I haven't ever been able to finish ats so I don't know how much this applies to cordy's but my guess is the pattern didn't change much)
THEY EVEN LOOK THE SAME FOR CHRIST’S SAKE IT WRITES ITSELF
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Just read your SFW/NSFW alphabet (which i absolutely loved btw), and now i'm wondering - how was it for Minotaur!König when he received oral for the first time? Did he like it and come in reader's mouth or was he like, no no, my semen belongs in your womanhood, we’re supposed to be mating after all.
Oh he loved it!
(…and for sure was stunned!)
Minotaur!König has seen a lot of crazy, horrible, violent things and tbh the rest, he imagined. Most stuff other people would view as abnormal won’t shake our Bull at all. It’s the slow, supple, gentle things that make him halt in awe; sunrise, sunset, birdsong and tender hugs for example. Kind words and soft speech, smiles that lack cruelty, a hot stew after a long day out in the sun. Soft, seductive legs wrapped around him at night; a pair of whispering lips on his scarred, sunburnt skin.
Still, oral sex is one of the few things that will make Minotaur!König flustered (for a lack of a better term). If you’d ask König what he considers to be the ugliest part of his body, he’d simply show you his cock! Paradoxically, he’s also proud of it because he knows he’s big and therefore “potent”. But cocks also remind him of crude, blunt weapons about to do harm… They’re not so different from a thick oaken club or a spear, only a thousand times more awkward. His is always up when it shouldn’t, leaks on everything that should stay unstained, and looks far too big to be thrust inside someone soft like her.
So when she wants to take it in her mouth, the shock value is greater than the immediate pleasure for a moment… This won’t produce babies, and it only gives pleasure to him. Plus she looks very helpless when she does it; down on her knees like a slave, her stare guided up as if she’s begging for mercy. He isn’t used to seeing her like this! He can’t even hear her moans, they’re muffled on his cock as if she’s choking on it, and the scene looks so violent… All the while the pleasure is overwhelming, the sensations simply too much for him. Even worse is that he enjoys it no matter how sloppy and desperate she looks (she’s just in love but as always, love takes a while to get through König’s thick skull) and cums in no time, unable—or so he says—to even speak and prevent his seed from going to waste.
He rarely, if ever, has to take support from anyone or anything but now he grabs hold of the wall because she even licks his slowly softening cock clean. Kisses the tip so gently that he has to fight the urge to flinch away from her. Licks her lips and gives him a mischievous look, asks if he liked it :)
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astrhae · 9 months
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crowley used the metal tool in season 1 to start time, and we learn that he's used it first to start space. to create the stars -- he still remembers how. he still remembers all of heaven's passwords: in the book crowley is described as an optimist because he has the "utter surety... that the universe would look after him". not god, but the universe. and of course he does: he helped create it and he's looking after it, too.
think about it: aziraphale had a sword, but crowley is about to face satan who wants to destroy the world, and crowley's only weapon is a tool of creation
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bylertruther · 1 year
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society if the duffers had gone through with their original plan to have mike go to the upside down in s1 to find will
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#byler#it's enough for me to know that he WOULD but i still would have liked to see it........ but i guess there's still s5..... sniffles n cries#when will's ankle gets caught in a vine n vecna goes YOINK n u just see mike's eyes go crazy wide as he starts sprinting after him faster#than he ever has tripping stumbling falling in a very mike fashion but he keeps going n he doesn't make it in time but it doesn't matter#it doesn't matter bc he's NOT going to lose will again he's NOT going to lose him on HIS watch a-fucking-gain he won't he CAN'T#and maybe it's a party affair so he looks back at lucas n dustin who are almost there and they're screaming after#him BECAUSE MIKE WAIT STOP MIKE WE DON'T HAVE THE RIGHT WEAPONS but mike just furrows his brow and goes in#bc he's the heart he's the paladin he's going to lead them and he's going to save will because will needs him but also he needs will#and. and um. well. then i fucking die of course#OR COULD U IMAGINE IF will goes on a solo mission and he thinks he's managed to sneak away but mike pops up like 'what are you doing? 🤨'#bc he always sees will and he always knows when something is up and it's a crazy plan but they did say crazy together and that they'd be a#team no matter what and that they would kill vecna so liek. do u see what im saying are u seeing my visions are u feeling my insanity rn .#they get surrounded or trapped somewhere and will casts fog cloud n saves the party like he did in a previous campaign. etc etc#dustin is their bard who has snacks n keeps things lighthearted mike leads the way n will is at his side n lucas is their eyes n ears n it'#almost like one of their campaigns bc the show started with that and those were their roles when will was missing and now it'll end#like that and so on n so forth. nods mhm mhm#takes deep breath ok back 2 studying i go byeeee
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phoenixcatch7 · 11 months
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If there's one thing I like more than time travel it's crossover reincarnation, so.
Botk link reincarnated as Damian Wayne.
An incredible weapon master of all types, but especially prodigious with a sword - he was beating knights at the age of 4 and with his memories as intact as they get for him I can see that goalpost moving even further (probably with traps and tricks, a 3yo doesn't exactly have great bodily control).
He's an excellent survivalist, agile, strong, durable, cunning and creative. He can move like a feather in the breeze, strike from behind with ease. His first kill, an animal, did not stir him as it did the other children. With his poise, grace, skills, obedience, he ought to be ra'as' finest assassin in the making, a jewel in the crown of the league.
Except he never speaks a word. Half his targets escape unscathed. He skates by true punishment on the merit of his skills and achievements in other missions. Testing has shown it is not a physical deformity that prevents his speech, but not even talia has been able to coaxe a word from him past his second birthday.
It is a defect ra'as is growing more and more frustrated by, as each attempt to fix these two final flaws ends in resounding failure. Less extreme solutions are running dry.
Talia fears those solutions. Her child does too, she knows. For them, there is a possible solution, more extreme than anything ra'as would tolerate.
She sends him out of the league. To his father.
To Gotham.
#'gee phoenix that sure sounds like that dp x dc you're normally rattling on about' yeah lol I steal tropes and sell them on the black market#Anyway this has been slowly rotisserie-ing in my head for a while I just like shaking canon like a magic 8 ball#I'd love to explore how link would react to Gotham and how he might see getting suddenly dumped in a found family as the youngest#And how that contrasts with both his expectations in the league and his role as the saviour last hope of a whole country#Because that kid cannot have a modern interpretation of killing. Like monsters? Kill with prejudice loot the corpses.#The yiga might have a little more hindsight understanding and he never killed them anyway but zero hesitation blowing them up#And ganon is so far removed from the concept of 'killing is bad' because a) human??? Monster??? B) literally the problem#C) he's been killing people so it'd even out d) everyone wants him dead So Bad e) been killed already like a dozen times what's one more#I get the feeling he'd assign the same role to the joker like 'widely considered the source of all evil. 'died' several times and came back#personal source of absolute misery for several heroes. Killed many' = slay the monster. Straightforward.#Like yes link always chooses kindness and has a strong morality and Opinion on killing people it's just a lot would be solved#By hitting the joker until he stopped making life miserable for everyone and if that means permanently well that's kind of link's job.#And like with Jason the bats understand that a lot better than they pretend to. But that is a 10yo who should not be thinking like that.#I think it'd be interesting to see how that'd change their reactions to 'Damian'. Like he holds a very similar opinion to og and Jason he#Just goes about it completely differently.#And I'd love to explore the differences between two fictional worlds and how they can go from pretty much the most black/white morality#To probably one of the greyest areas while still holding near identical themes and methods of dealing with that.#Found family compassion as a weapon against evil and copious amounts of weapons and cool gear lol#Also link should keep the arm he's earned it. Reincarnating with all his memories knocked a few other things loose I'd imagine#Mostly because all the loz games I've played have absolutely altered the way I view any link and also I love referencing them.#Damian with telekinesis and infinite glue would be great. A tiny 10yo sword master choosing instead to drop a dumpster on you#In between hurt comfort link beginning to bond with his family and begin to speak and learn sign language from cass#There's also the sound of explosives and a small figure clinging to a flying door as it crosses the Gotham night skies#Speaking of cass I bet her and link would be great friends in this au.#batman#batfam#bruce wayne#loz au#Loz#loz totk
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commanderfreddy · 7 months
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i dont know about you guys but i love being hoist by my own petard. every time i do something stupid or apply a critical framework to something or initiate a very weird interaction with someone im always like oh man i really hope this gets turned around on me next. my favourite thing in the world is when i like playfully make fun of someone for failing to do something like open a jar or whatever and then i try and im like. even worse than them somehow. no better flavour than the taste of my own medicine
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ciderspunk2077 · 5 months
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Not to be self indulgent… but V(ance) going on a gig where he has to go undercover as a supermodel again
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el-im · 2 years
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caemthe · 2 years
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𝐈𝐍 𝐁𝐀𝐓𝐓𝐋𝐄  [ … ]   𝐘𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝐌𝐔𝐒𝐄
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bold what applies - italicize sometimes - repost,  don’t reblog.
fights honorably / fights dirty
prefers close - quarters / prefers range 
chats during / goes silent
low pain tolerance / high pain tolerance
attacks in bursts / attacks steadily
goes for the kill / aims to disarm / fights defensively /strikes first
is provoked easily / provokes their opponent / teases
gets visibly frustrated / shouts while attacking
uses strategy / focuses on the battle / experiences conflicting thoughts during battle
rushes in recklessly / tries to read their opponent before engaging
fights wildly / fights calmly / fights apathetically / fights with anger / fights with excitement
fights because they have to / fights because they want to
fights without regard to wounds / runs away when wounded / hides wounds / takes a blow to protect another
prefers a blade /  prefers a gun / prefers hand to hand combat / prefers a bow / prefers a shield / prefers a personalized weapon / prefers magic, alchemy or spells
their greatest weakness is physical / their greatest weakness is mental / their greatest weakness is emotional
transforms for battle / fights as they appear
relies on strength / doubts their strength / relies on speed
uses everything they have / proceeds with caution / hides their full potential
exhausts quickly / has high stamina
behaves arrogantly / brags after landing a hit / belittles their abilities
uses psychological tactics / uses brute strength
avoids civilians / strikes down civilians
damages surroundings / avoids damaging surroundings
signature fighting style / makes it up as they go
mastered skill - set / learning their skill - set
fancy footwork / sloppy footwork
messy fighter / elegant fighter
accepts defeat / refuses defeat / begs for mercy
compliments their opponent / insults their opponent
uses unnecessary movements / moves efficiently / barely moves
prefers to dodge / prefers to block
defends their blindside / has no blindside / leaves blindsides vulnerable
uses all available advantages / strictly uses one main method
plays around / holds back / fights ruthlessly / shows mercy
waits for an opponent to be ready / strikes when opponent isn’t ready
fears death / fears pain / fears killing
has ptsd / avoids fighting
has lost a fight / has won a fight
has killed / refuses to kill
wants to die standing / would succumb slowly
tagged by: @corrchoigilt ty skelly!! tagging: @castelleve @inheroic @corvusdei @soulcrux @ardenssolis @revivisaere @resolutepath @stovthearted @nulltune @dunscaiith @tenkoseiensei @hhemeraa​ @hellguarded​
#tagged. ° ( thank you! )#ferdia. ° ( saber. )#/ alright so something to keep in mind about ferdiad is that he has skin that no (non-break invincible) weapon can harm#/ so he focuses solely on striking down his enemy. the moment an enemy tries (and fails) to pull a sneak attack on him or land a hit on him-#/ he either grabs them and crushes them or cuts them down with his falcata. all in all ferdiad is an 'unfair' opponent because he's strong-#/ trying to strike him down with a non-break invincible weapon is impossible and he never seems to get tired. he'll just continue#/ striking his opponent at a steady pace looking unbothered by how many times they've failed to stab or hit him#/ anyone that tries to interrupt or stop the fight gets cut down as well. even if his opponent fights dirty and tries to pick a hostage#/ he's not cruel and derives no joy or satisfaction from hurting/killing but he shows no mercy nor empathy either#/ he's just a really efficient and intimidating warrior 99% of the time. the other 1% is when he had to fight cú in specific in the táin#/ i mean he still was the equivalent of a impenetrable fortress that never seems to run out of armies and ammo during their fight#/ but he also was downright nasty with cú. he said a lot of hurtful things with the intention of making cú suffer and lose his resolve#/ which is something he wouldn't have done against any other enemy. that 'hurt loved ones when you're hurt' attitude is really something#/ well at least now you know that when things get personal ferdiad is VICIOUS. which is something i'll always find very 👀👀👀#/ but on a brighter note please imagine ferdiad as a maxed out g.enshin noelle going 'steady as stone!'
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despairforme · 13 days
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Ive noticed something about canon nnoitra, so hes the only hollow with a hole in his head, right? Ive suspected that this symbolized a sort of mental illness when he was human
But then i noticed in his resurrection, he can summon spare scythes from inside his wrists...
❝ Nah, havin' yer hollow hole go through yer head ain't uncommon. ❞ He wasn't the only one. There were PLENTY of others. Like Loly or Lilynette. Or Shawlong. He didn't know what the hole in his head symbolized. He didn't like the thought of it having something to do with a "mental illness", but of course --- He did think it had something to do with the eternal amount of negative thoughts he had. The reason for him becoming a Hollow had to be because of DESPAIR. Why else would that be his aspect of death? The source of his powers? And the worst type of despair was the kind your mind could bring forth. Because there was no escape from that. Nothing you could do to battle it. So yeah - maybe his hollow hole had something to do with that. He wondered if that meant that all the other Hollow with holes through their heads had similar struggles to him. Nah. No way.
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❝ 'N Where ELSE would I pull 'em from? 'S 'da most convenient joint on my exo-skeleton. ❞ The outer skeleton that Nnoitra received in his Resurrection, giving him that insect motif that his Zanpakuto carried. He didn't understand what summoning scythes from his wrists had to do with anything.
Unless - maybe - they thought it had something to do with suicide. Nnoitra had tried to kill himself in the past, thanks to Nelliel. But he'd never - Ever - thought about doing it like that. To slit his wrists like a coward and bleed out. He was not a coward. He was going to die standing on his own two feet. In battle. Drawing his final breath and knowing he'd been strong to the very end. If he killed himself like a coward, that would ruin everything.
He didn't often think about how he'd died as a human. It was so long ago - 1000 years, give or take - and his human life was as alien to him as anything. He sometimes didn't feel like he'd ever even been human. Since it was so distant, it didn't much matter to him how he'd died. He knew there hadn't been a Shinigami there to lead him to Soul Society. And that SOMETHING about his death had made his soul turn hollow. Maybe he'd died from suicide. It wasn't impossible.
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microclown · 4 months
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I was rewatching s1e3 and something finally clicked for me..
Please forgive me if this seems obvious to you. It helps me to type out my thoughts, but I'm sure I'm just an idiot and no one else needs this explained to them, lol. That said - I was always slightly confused by the emotional weight of the holy water arc during the flashback sequence. Particularly I was confused by how angry Crowley got when Aziraphale referred to their relationship as fraternizing in the 1862 fight. I mean, "to associate or form a friendship with someone, especially when one is not supposed to" is exactly what they are doing, right? So why the 80 year breakup?
Crowley says he wants the holy water for if "it" all goes pear shaped. The phrasing is necessarily vague, and could mean lots of things. Since I know what he eventually uses it for, I was thinking about it in the context of Armageddon, or maybe more generally and vaguely about Crowley not always choosing to go along with Hell, and associating with Aziraphale. But there was not much reason for Crowley to already be thinking about Armageddon back then.
As we know from the full diary entry Neil posted, the timeline of the Edinburgh entry, and the cut bookshop opening scene, it seems like Crowley and Aziraphale were spending A LOT of time together by the 1800's. When Crowley is pulled back down to Hell in 1827, he learns that Hell is paying more attention to him than he'd previously thought. Crowley realizes at this point that spending so much time with Aziraphale is actively putting him in real danger. He recognizes that, and instead of breaking things off, or seeing Aziraphale less, he doubles down. If this relationship is dangerous, then he wants the tools to fight for it.
That's what I think I didn't get about the holy water request. It's not just general insurance, it's specifically insurance for if Hell finds out about him and Aziraphale. It's also a super vulnerable request because in making it, Crowley is openly acknowledging how important their relationship is to him. Aziraphale casually brings up the arrangement at the beginning of the conversation, and that's part of it, right? Because the whole basis of their relationship is the arrangement. It continues to be the pretense under which they meet, despite the relationship clearly having developed beyond that. And the arrangement, as Crowley proposed it in 537, is born out of convenience, and the assumption that Heaven and Hell would never notice anyway.
Crowley's request for insurance breaks that facade. He's acknowledging that it's not convenient, or safe, but he wants to do it anyway, despite the risk.
Aziraphale, on the other hand, is not ready for the screen to be taken away so abruptly. To make it worse, he assumes Crowley wants the holy water as an escape, rather than a weapon. Suddenly he is confronted with both the danger their association poses, and the idea that Crowley might choose to take his own life. He can't imagine the guilt of being directly responsible for the latter.
I also think the strength of his own emotional response to the thought of losing Crowley catches Aziraphale off guard. He hasn't admitted to himself how much he actually cares, and it scares him. Worrying about Heaven is more comfortable and familiar, so he falls back on that and switches to "If they knew I'd been... fraternizing!"
But bringing up the threat of Heaven reads to Crowley as Aziraphale saying "You may be willing to put yourself at risk for the sake of our relationship, but I am not." The word choice of "fraternizing" comes off as a dismissive and demeaning way to describe a relationship that Crowley just admitted he would risk his life for.
It's an unintentionally deep cut when Crowley is already at his most vulnerable, and so he lashes out. As far as we've seen, this is possibly the first time Crowley has truly lashed out at Aziraphale. So yeah, 80 year breakup makes sense!
And what makes this so much worse is what happens next. Crowley reaches out again in 1941 with a dramatic gesture (rescuing Aziraphale from the Nazis, saving his books). It's clear they've missed each other. They don't discuss the fight, but it's there subtextually. Aziraphale, tentatively and thrillingly, refers to them as friends, for the first time ever. He tells Crowley that he trusts him.
And then, that very same night their worst fears are confirmed. Just when they've finally reconciled a fight over the dangers of their relationship, and just when Aziraphale has finally admitted that it is not a relationship of convenience, but genuine friendship, they are exposed. Crowley is going to face punishment from Hell, explicitly for being Aziraphale's "trusted confident", and he doesn't have insurance. If Aziraphale's trick hadn't succeeded, Crowley would have had no way to protect himself.
idk it just makes me feel things ok
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emmafrostyyy · 6 months
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y'all sleeping on Astarion/Lae'zel bc this moment is so...the way the flippant demeanor drops and he doesn't hesitate to call her out for sticking with her version of Cazador like their relationship is so underrated fr...
sitting down writing this bullshit like let me peel it like an onion a bit and elaborate why this pairing is fascinating to me
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It's really interesting how during the most cathartic, life-altering moment in Astarion's questline, the reactions of the other companions are more about the moral wrongness/guilt of sacrificing innocent lives. Lae'zel doesn't do that and instead relates to his hurt.
She knows what's he's feeling, the lack of control, the unfairness of being powerless for too long. This is a woman who just found out her entire life purpose was built on lies, discarded and hunted by her own people after outliving her usefulness, and groomed to basically die for an insane power-hungry lich queen. She knows all too well that power isn't always real freedom. Her first instinct is to empathize with Astarion to steer him away from his hate and resentment.
Astarion/Lae'zel is so interesting to me because they're such a classic "can we make each other worse or make a better person out of the other?".
They both have genuine appreciation for violence and respect each other's ruthlessness. Astarion was used as a weapon of seduction while Lae'zel was of warfare. Sex with people is meaningless and not real intimacy for them, and while both have little understanding/experience of interpersonal relationships beyond the physical, they still feel and love very deeply. They have no frame of reference for things like friendship and warmth, but they badly want all of that and more, even if they don't know it yet.
In-game they can sleep with each other, which is basically the foundation of the normal Tav/Astarion romance. Lae'zel saw him during combat and got horny, who knows. Astarion who's used to luring people with his charms, takes up Lae'zel's blunt offer because she's a strong hardened warrior that can provide protection and be a worthy ally, and he doesn't know how to say no. Navigating the complications between one who wants to be seen beyond as a sex object, and one who comes from a totally alien culture with no concept of love/family/connections and only sex is honestly really compelling to me. It's a transactional, mutually beneficial thing with no emotional expectations. Once you get past the skeevy rockiness of their early relationship, I really like the idea of them slowly seeing something past the exterior and realizing they may have harshly misjudged the other, an unspoken friendship blooms, and in comes the realization that they are essentially loners longing for kindness and a comforting touch in the most desperate of situations.
Lae'zel is prideful, direct, has no sense of courtship talk, and doesn't hold back her thoughts the slightest--she's not sweet/agreeable and what you see is really what you get, which I imagine would be disarming for Astarion who's used to vacuous flattery and has difficulty trusting others. But she's also insanely protective, passionate, loyal, and an initiator-- every romance scene is triggered by her first and she's always showing effort towards her relationships, which would mesh well with Astarion who does need someone to nudge him.
She doesn't purposely suppress her feelings, she's just simply at loss at how to express them sometimes due to her wildly different upbringing. She stops the sparring match you agree to and an easy vulnerability slips instantly out of her: "I don't want to hurt you. I want to protect you, and for you to protect me." and "Thus far I've taunted you, devoured you, battled you. Now I want more than anything to soothe you." are romantic as fuck and Astarion of all people really needs to hear that tbh.
Astarion is also someone who struggles with reinforcing his boundaries, and a key theme in Lae'zel's romance is that she encourages and wants you to challenge her and learn to stand your ground. It's not gentlest method, but hey, relationships are about having to make an effort to learn each other's language.
I think he also would take pleasure "educating her on the matters of Fay-run" (I believe there's a whole banter with him teasing her and teaching her pet names) and would get a kick out of coaxing Lae'zel out of her shell with her shyness at showing public affection, and making her blush. Also it simply would be fucking funny to see Astarion who's used to easy seduction, trying to pass a persuasion check just to get a smooch and generally having to work to earn regular kisses from Lae'zel lmfaooo
Lae'zel also initially struggles to see her chains as chains. When she learns about Vlaakith's betrayal, she copes instantly through denial and shuts it down. Astarion is NOT having it and calls her out, he knows her well enough to recognize that she would value blunt honesty above all.
I imagine he also despises her lack of self-preservation, the way her entire identity is tied to duty and being in service of others, and doesn't understand her desire to still help/liberate the people that want her dead and are hunting her down. He wants to make this duty-bound soldier realize that looking out for herself, and putting herself first may not be the worst thing in the world.
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They're so similar to each other but are also polar opposites in some ways that make a more equal, balanced romance I think. It's not a simple, one-sided, feel-good "she/he can fix her/him" fantasy because both of them have to earn each other's love, actually cut through the other's flaws, and actively motivate each other to be better versions of themselves.
They're not at all the other's ideal guiding hand. It's rough, jagged, and imperfect, but that's how healing goes. It's so far from being the healthiest relationship -- but even if their belief systems differ, their moral compass does often align. I imagine it's a slight relief for them to have a partner where there would be less shame and judgment when they expectedly, occasionally slip up and fall into their bad habits.
Also, man, the "You showed me the betweens and beyonds. Beyond war and peace, beyond passion and obsession, most importantly, you showed me freedom.", "First you were my wound, now you were my cure.", "But you saw something else in me - someone else I could be. Someone who could break the cycle of power and terror that started centuries ago.." lines really hit hard when applied to them.
Of course, they can also make each other worse, feed into the other's negative traits that will bring out the worst part of themselves. It's this duality of their pairing that is very interesting to explore, the way it can steer in either direction because it's an intense, fraught relationship at its core.
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deadghosy · 2 months
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Okay, I saw the part in the noob!reader post about Kirby. I love Kirby and would love a Kirby!reader in hazbin hotel. Like how he is cute but can consume worlds and everyone is just like *pikachu shocked face*, same with him being able to pull out random weapons from his abilities. I can imagine he got there from a new weird portal and meta knight is like “where is he NOW?”.
Kirby is a being of chaos and I love him ❤️
I ALSO LOVE KIRBBY I WAS A BIG KIRBY KIN💗💗 🦆
HAZBIN HOTEL X KIRBY! READER
prompt: you lost the sight of your best friend only to be somewhere completely different.
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Meta knight was walking ahead of you as you picked up flowers with your cute smile. “Poyo!” You said smiling ready to show meta knight your flowers you picked up into a bouquet. 
When all of a sudden, you were getting pulled into a red portal as you screamed out to meta knight who seemed to be in his own world.
“POYO! POYO!” You then get sucked in as meta knight turns to see nothing. “Reader/Kirby?…..where is he NOW!” Meta knight exclaims, his accent thickening in worry as he runs around the area calling out your name.
Meta was basically that Brandon rogers meme when he lost his “child” 😭
You swirl in the portal to get thrown out and roll into the feet of a person. “Oh my! Are you okay sweetie?” The sweet voice says as she picks you up. Charlie looked worry seeing you dizzy. “Poyoo..” you said with a dazed out look from your trip of the portal.
Charlie took you in her hotel, getting you water and suited to rest as vaggie checks up. After 24 hours, they kept you as you became part of the hotel staff.
I headcannon you once accidentally swallowed Angel because you saw him as a regular spider. You literally transformed into his color palette before Charlie made you cough him up.
Angel was so traumatized 😭
I imagine you literally almost ending hell’s population by yourself cause you were hungry..you dead ass ran through the streets eating random shit. Thank goodness Lucifer picked you up and ran.
You once walked into Lucifer brain storming and he saw you…he immediately had a new idea for his duck creation. He made you stay in his room until Charlie said it was your bed time.
Vaggie always keep tabs on you so you don’t cause trouble around the pride ring and the hotel.
IMAGINE HOW YOU LITERALLY ATE A BUILDING…A FUCKING BUILDING AND HUSK WHO TOOK YOU FOR A ERRAND STROLL WAS LIKE
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The egg boiz
Nahh cause you definitely had swallowed up the egg boiz to have a egg shell around you to hide in the egg shell like an ability.
Sir Pentious is always scared of the fact of you just eating him. But you don’t cause you literally get fed chips by the bar. So Pentious calms down and lets you have some time with him
Lucifer would probably make you inhale one of his rubber ducks so you can have a duck beak and wings just so he can chase you around with heart eyes excited that his hyperfixation became real
You have a duck hat and a duck pj set. ALSO WITH AN APPLE THEME SET WHICH IS FAMOUS IN MORNINGSTAR FAMILY ❤️❤️
I can see you always following Alastor like the egg boiz did in “scrambled eggs” 😭 except you just waddle beside him cutely
“Poyoooo… poyoooo..” you said softly as you tug on Alastor’s pant leg. Alastor looks down slightly entertained by your language and gesture for him to look at you.
“Well aren’t you an eager little thing…” alastor says picking you up and taking you to show Rosie his new found friend.
Husk once
STOP IT CAUSE WHAT IF YOU INHALED A KNIFE AND EQUIPPED IT ONLY YOU BE THAT FUCKIN MEME WITH KIRBY HOLDING A KNIFE😭😭
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YOU WOULD STAB SOMEONE’S TOES AND KNEES YOU ABSOLUTE MENACE!!‼️
You definitely stood outside of the Vee’s tower holding the knife with a smile as Valentino looks so scared closing his curtains.
#justiceforangeldust
Angel dust loves you to the point he might adopt you as a sibling since you are pink like him.
Charlie and vaggie are the parents who maintain what you eat and sleep. Dead as you were gonna eat a butterfly when vaggie picked you up like “NOPE! NOT TODAY!” And took you inside for the rest of the time-
See I can personally just imagine that Kirby gif where Kirby eats the whole ass meal on the table. So imagine the crew’s face seeing you do that shit 😭
I can see you getting on fat nuggets and just start to ride fat nuggets like a cowboy 😭💗
Angel definitely recorded it as you just smile while fat nuggets runs around the hotel freely.
I headcannon you bought a bunch a flowers for the crew and the was so adorable how you just picked each flower matching the cast’s colors
Imagine you just watching a hell cartoon and Vox is like “kill them! Kill your entire family” as you jolted shocked and cry at the scary tv man
Niffty once fed you dust particles thinking it wouldn’t affect you…it did cause you coughed and got sick. Niffty cried, not thinking it would harm you as she sniffles giving you soup in your room.
Niffty was banned from making lunch for you😭
Alastor be trying to troll you into eating cannibal meat, like dead ass he would make you a sandwich with “turkey” meat. But you could already smell THE MUSSTTT 🤮
So he failed with that mission. But at least you like his radio station and his jazz music.
Charlie brought you to her meeting with the first man so she can feel comfortable as you are kinda like her service animal.
Adam actually would like you cause you love to eat endlessly and you are pick up size. This mf will literally pick you up with one hand and dribble you like a basketball or treat you like a damn football💀
“Hey lute! Go long!” “Yes sir!” Lute replies back as she moves back far. Adam launches you making you scream as lute flies up and catches you.
“GOALLLL! FUCK YEAH!” Lute says accidentally throwing you off of the cloud floor they were on. “LUTE WTF?!” Adam yells looking at you fall before a portal had eaten you up. “Well damnit…I was gonna miss that lil pink shit.” Adam says before walking away with lute close behind him
Meta knight is back at home was tweaking out as he literally sobs eating with a picture of you on the table. He misses you deeply as he stares at the photo before looking down. “My friennnd…” he says with a sniffle as he covers his face.
Good ending was that you plopped down on the table from the portal as meta immediately hugs you as you smiled happily, showing him the flowers. You guys ate dinner happily!
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Ayo! Can I request of TF141 + König x Fem! Reader who sneeze like a kitten and how the mens react when they see her sneeze. Imagine like Y/n was minding her own business and she sneeze, then the men’s watch her awe.
Take all the time no need to rush.
Thank you for this!! Thought this was a cute request. Sorry this is a bit short, but hope you enjoy!🙃🩷
141 Boys + König with a Reader who Sneezes like a Kitten
Warnings: swearing
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Simon "Ghost" Riley-
It was awhile into the two of you dating, before he heard you sneeze for the first time.
You were cooking dinner together in your apartment, when you turned your head to the side and squeaked out a sneeze.
"What in the bloody hell was that?" Simon asked, directing his attention to you.
You lifted a finger at him, and turned your head away as you let out another sneeze. "Apologies, must be my allergies."
"That….was a sneeze?" Simon asked incredulously. He'd never in his life heard someone sneeze like that.
"Unfortunately." You chuckled, amused at your boyfriend's reaction.
"It was…kind of cute." Simon's cheeks burned at his admission. "It was like a little kitten."
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Soap MacTavish-
Both of you were laying in bed, cuddling before a mission. You were snuggled into Soap's side while he was stroking your arm lightly.
"I love y-." You were cut off mid sentence by an oncoming sneeze, you sat up and quickly turned your head to the side to sneeze. A small squeak came out, and you turned to see Johnny staring at you in awe.
"That was possibly the most adorable noise I've ever heard." He couldn't help but laugh, incredibly amused at your little sneeze.
"Oh hush, I've always hated my sneezes." You pushed him lightly. You felt another one coming and braced yourself.
"Oi yeah, give me another one. Gotta hear this again." Soap bit his lip to prevent himself from laughing further.
You let out another squeaky sneeze, and Soap cackled the rest of the day because of it.
"Hey L.T. You've gotta hear Y/N's sneeze. Sounds like a mouse kitten hybrid. It's bloody adorable." He'd later told Ghost, much to your dismay.
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Kyle "Gaz" Garrick-
Like you, Gaz also has rather squeaky sneezes. The first time he'd heard you sneeze, you and the 141 were on a mission together.
You and Gaz were camping out in a small hideout when you had the urge to sneeze. You took a deep breath in to try and fight iy, which caused Gaz to look in your direction. "You good, babe?"
You nodded your head, causing you to squeak out a sneeze.
"Oh my God! You sneeze like me!" Gaz cried out, a smile forming on his face.
"I, what?"
"Your sneeze, it's like mine. Got a little squeak to it." Gaz was practically beaming, and you had to bite your lip to prevent yourself from laughing at your boyfriend. This certainly wasn't the reaction you expected.
Later on that night, you awoke to sounds of repeated squeaking coming from beside you. "Gaz?"
"See? Told you my sneezes were like yours!"
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John Price-
Price was on a work call at your house when he heard your sneeze for the first time. You were in the other room trying to be as quiet as possible, but you'd looked at the sun through the window a little too long and felt the distinct feeling of a sneeze coming on.
You quickly threw your face into your arm and let out a squeak.
You could hear Price stop talking in the other room. He poked his head out from the doorway and called out to you. "Love? You okay?"
"I'm fine! Just a sneeze!"
"That was the weakest sneeze I've ever heard in my life." John had a shit eating grin on his face as he addressed you.
"Would you rather me sneeze like you? Loud enough to shake the whole house?" You quipped with a smile.
"Fair enough, love. I'll take the squeaky sneezes."
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König-
The two of you were cleaning your weapons together, when a bit of dust came off the weapon, directly into your nose.
You blinked back slight tears, and turned your head to the side letting out a sneeze.
König whipped his head around the room, looking for the source of the noise. "Y/N. Is there a cat in here?"
The fact that he was deadly serious had you in a fit of giggles. He was walking around the room, inspecting each corner intently.
"What? What's so funny?" Konig asked bemused, stopping his search to look at you.
"I sneezed, love. There's no kitten."
König's eyes widened as he let out a chuckle. From then on, you'd lovingly earned the nickname "Kätzchen" from him.
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A/N: I hope you enjoyed!! :) working on some requests now, but am always open for new ones🙃
Also Kätzchen is German for kitten😊
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tossawary · 24 days
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At the end of "Fullmetal Alchemist", Ed Elric quits the military, has given up his ability to "play god", and is (as he has been since he burned his fucking house down as a tweenager) homeless, disabled, and crashing at the Rockbell place to help his very sick brother recover.
And it's easy and funny to imagine Edward Elric essentially becoming the house husband of successful and innovative automail mechanic Winry Rockbell (and later a stay-at-home dad). Small family businesses are pretty much always a mess of needing an extra hand just to answer phones and the mail, to schedule appointments, to deliver and pick up parts, to organize stock, to "just hold this for a second for me", and so on. Pinako is not getting any younger and could use someone to cook dinner and fix the roof while she rests her back!!! Winry is busy!!!
There is also always a lot to do in a rural community, so I'm sure that Ed would find another hobby in the absence of alchemy and could turn it into a gig if necessary, if he really doesn't like automail. He has a lot of skills that he could potentially turn towards an income. I've also generally assumed that Ed made a pretty decent amount of money as a State Alchemist and still has some generous savings on that front.
But I was also thinking that it would be kind of funny if being a State Alchemist came with incredible retirement benefits. Like, the military wants to lure people in with wealth and power and resources - and then make alchemists desperate enough to keep these things that they become walking weapons of war, commit horrible crimes against humanity in the name of "research", and/or resort to human transmutation and become viable sacrifices. Ed never had to worry about getting kicked out (and presumably losing his benefits) because he was a perfect human sacrifice from the get-go (although he didn't know this). I'm guessing a lot of State Alchemists were never actually able to retire between dying in wars, failing out of the program (the brass finding excuses to save money! Bosses are always cheap!), getting arrested for speaking out or actually getting caught publicly doing bad shit, and being murdered for their crimes against humanity.
But, in theory, maybe the State Alchemist retirement benefits were absolutely incredible if you could somehow survive long enough or get permission for an early, "honorable" retirement, because King Bradley (who let's say set up this financial bait) somewhat reasonably assumed that Father would completely destroy the country before he'd ever have to pay out a pension. Which means that Ed could be out of the military for years and somehow still costing Roy Mustang a lot of money.
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