#bro i know it sounds silly but i feel so fucking stupid for still struggling w my mh the way that i do

[placeinthisworld]

.

#bro i know it sounds silly but i feel so fucking stupid for still struggling w my mh the way that i do #like it’s so embarrassing i’m literally bullying myself in my brain to the point of wanting to relapse and for what reason? #my brain is just so fucked up? and the one therapist i was actually honest with dumped me bc i was too complicated??? #like i swear to goooood it’s just easier to *** but like how do you get over that feeling of just not being good enough or stable enough #or smart enough or nice enough #genuinely not sure if it’s the stress or anxiety or if i’m really just not good enough for this #i can’t tell if i’m being dramatic or if it’s my bpd making me upset or if how i feel is justified and i literally have nobody to tell me #just a rant bc i’m so fucking sad i could do something bad about it but im consciously not does that mean anything?

[badbitch-bookclub]

Week 3 Thoughts on Lost Gods by Gerald Brom

Chapters 51-65

Thot Pocket: So Senoy be fucking that grandma huh?

Britney Smears: Lol. Do y’all suspect that? I didn’t at all.

Thot Pocket: Not at all!

Hell No Kitty: Nooooo.

Thot Pocket: So it sounds like Gavin discovered their affair and killed him. Well, that’s Senoy’s perspective. I bet she tricked him into a living body to bound him there and made Gavin kill him.

Hell No Kitty: Senoy, was a full blown human before that right? I was a little confused about what he is.

Thot Pocket: He’s an angel. Specifically working under Gabriel. But she made him “living flesh.”

Hell No Kitty: Okay this makes more sense.

Bomb Weasley: It was at twist I wasn’t suspecting tbh.

Britney Smears: Did Gavin kill him when he was an angel first?

Thot Pocket: No. After Lamia changed him Gavin stabbed him. His body is rotting, too from the sound of it.

Bomb Weasley: I didn’t catch that part. It sounds like she’s ready to bail on him as soon as she can. Makes me think there’s gonna be another twist.

Britney Smears: For sure, something else to do with Senoy, Lamia, and Gavin.

Thot Pocket: She used his ass like a tampon and chucked him into the nearest sewer lmfao.

Hell No Kitty: Yeah that scene where she just walks away and the little demon kid basically says "she is going to leave you" was brutal.

Britney Smears: Grandma is like this seductress child killer.

Thot Pocket: Well, in her defense he hid her from god at first to torture her and then his stupid ass got seduced.

Britney Smears: I wonder if Gavin is still in love with her.

Thot Pocket: Yeah he doesn’t really think of her. I’m wondering if he’s gonna be the sympathetic victim because he was set up as the villain. Also I’m so fucking happy Velles is ALIVE lol.

Britney Smears: Ditto I was a little disappointed at how quickly they got him though. Like I thought he’d put up a bigger fight.

Thot Pocket: It makes sense as an assassination attempt. They don’t want to fight him. They know that’s stupid. Better to be dirty and kill them off guard.

Britney Smears: I’m also curious how y’all feel about them going after the gods.

Thot Pocket: I don’t like it honestly.

Hell No Kitty: I don't like them killing the gods. Their parts of the story are not super interesting and I dislike Carlos so much. This is silly but like what is even the point of them killing the gods? Do they just want power of purgatory?

Bomb Weasley: I think so, it’s like a perpetual power struggle there.

Thot Pocket: They want to free the souls from what they deem as oppression. They see believers as slaves. Which is HILARIOUS coming from the confederate colonel. It’s also wild to me that Carlos is much more ignorant and even calls him a communist lol.

Britney Smears: Ooof yea that conversation they had made me cringe lol.

Hell No Kitty: Which like Carlos isn't a white name? Why is he on that guy's side hahaha?

Thot Pocket: This book is anti Mexican haha. I agree with you Bomb, at least on Carlos’ position and that demon Lord. Why is the confederate like “I just wanna help?” Fuck out of here. I don’t like that he’s supposed to be “good intentioned.” Bro died wanting to OWN people lol.

Bomb Weasley: Kinda makes me think of us liberating oil.

Thot Pocket: It’s crazy babies go there cuz they’re incapable of believing shit lol.

Bomb Weasley: It’s super sad, they are all alone.

Thot Pocket: We’re you guys scared for the Red Lady at all?

Britney Smears: No she seems stronger than the other gods. To me at least.

Hell No Kitty: Is the red lady the one on the cover? I assumed so, so I wasn't too worried about her. That is the only reason I thought she would be okay, not much deep literary thought put into that.

Britney Smears: Same that’s literally the only reason I wasn’t worried about her either and was like eh she’s strong and can take care of herself lol.

Thot Pocket: See, I trust NOTHING.

Britney Smears: Bitch is on the cover!!

Thot Pocket: And the main character of psycho is murdered halfway! You never know lol. Spoilers for Psycho lmfao.

Hell No Kitty: I gotta say my favorite line from the book so far was "Heaven is full of sheep. Hell is full of those who actually shaped the world..."

Thot Pocket: LOVED IT. Any predictions?

Bomb Weasley: Yes. That is was a trick the whole time. And the angel wants to use the key to run into the sunset with the demon grandma.

Hell No Kitty: I love this.

Britney Smears: I feel like Chet and gavin will get along. Even though it may be a trick Chet could still save Trish.

Bomb Weasley: I think she dies. And the baby.

Hell No Kitty: I do think the baby dies.

Bomb Weasley: And gets dropped into the River.

Thot Pocket: Dear God that’s sad lol. What if him and his grandpa team up and do expendables in Lamia’s house?

Bomb Weasley: Plot twist. This was really just propaganda to make people baptize their babies.

Hell No Kitty: Totally possible.

Thot Pocket: I think the opposite. I think Trish and Baby live, but everything else goes BAD.

Bomb Weasley: Like how bad?

Thot Pocket: Like he doesn’t get her when he needs to and maybe she runs off with the baby or something. It keeps implying she’s about to leave.

Bomb Weasley: That would probably be the best outcome, she just leaves.

Britney Smears: So senoy just said that if Chet gets the key he could save Trish and baby, right? Not Trish baby and himself?

Thot Pocket: Yeah he’s dead as fuck. I don’t think there is any coming back. I don’t think the key is gonna help them anymore, I think it’s just Senoy manipulating him.

Bomb Weasley: Does he have Lilith blood?

Britney Smears: Yes!

Bomb Weasley: Maybe that will kinda help him and he’ll be stuck like the angel. I know that’s pretty obtuse.

Thot Pocket: I guess the reason I doubt that is if she could reanimate corpses why couldn’t she take over her dead daughter’s ya know? But I could also just be flat wrong. But I’m still intrigued regardless.

Bomb Weasley: Good point.

Britney Smears: Chet becomes an angel and him Trish and baby survive. And Lamia dies somehow. My prediction.

Hell No Kitty: I really want Trish to be the one to kill Lamia.

Britney Smears: That would be good.

Thot Pocket: Killing her ass with that nail board would be pretty metal.

Bomb Weasley: That would be a good ending.

Hell No Kitty: Maybe somehow Trish also dies while killing Lamia and then Ana somehow gets to take care of the baby. Fin. I just like Ana.

Thot Pocket: She’s awesome. I really like her character and I appreciate that Chet doesn’t abandon her. I also like that there’s no weird tensions. They’re just two people in the after life.

Bomb Weasley: Yes I love that too!

#books #book club #books and literature #books and reading #gerald brom #lost gods #books & libraries #booksbooksbooks #reading #read in 2023

[finsterhund]

Oh shit a new episode of the Ahsoka show came out while I was on my camping trip...

Spoilers under break.

Still genuinely confused about Sabine being force sensitive. It kinda feels like the show is too???? Idk maybe Luke took to everything so fast in A New Hope because he was a Skywalker but Sabine is really struggling????

Jesus Christ this episode continues to just show the New Republic as stupid bureaucrats. :( "You're wasting resources trying to find this missing kid, even though it's specifically to track down Thrawn being alive also because he's a threat." Bruh. I looked up to you guys when I was little you're breaking my heart.

Jacen is sweet. They made him look a bit more on the human side though? Why isn't he being trained? He's a good age to start considering how old Anakin was and also probably actually force sensitive.

Yeah Sabine is straight up "I don't feel the force" Ahsoka is like "not everyone can handle the discipline it takes" like bro you were trained since you were an infant!!!!

Okay so now Huyang is like "the Order wouldn't have accepted her" so he just straight up lied to Sabine in the last episode. Mean.

I see where the writers are going now. But Ahsoka isn't being smart about it. I really am clashing with this writing. What's basically "plot armor" except it's a "character being made to be stupider than they canonically should be" called?

THE RETURN OF TEARSTAINS WHITE DOG!!! MY BLORBO!!! In a little fighter ship aaaaaa fuck why has this character grown on me so much in such a stupid fucking way bro

God a part of my brain has retroactively decided that Hati is a lichthund and her ship is actually some sort of SW canon compliant synth wing alternative. It makes her feel a lot more realistic tbh. God I'd never want my hounds to be an actual canon SW race because that'd mean Disney would own them now but I haven't actually thought about them ACTUALLY seriously literally showing up in a piece of SW media for AGES.

Okay so I've had an internal running joke where I just go "haha lichthund" every time Disney has someone do something that doesn't make sense under normal pre Disney canonical circumstances but would be a possibility in my own work. ie: hyperspace ramming: this is a very lichthund thing to do fyi they're fucking obsessed with that, surviving lightsaber stab wounds in vital places: sounds like somebody's part lichthund to me, etc. It's a joke, it's coping, it's genuinely silly, but now I'm actually taking it seriously. FFS.

The idea of a lichthunde who relies entirely on their synth wing is hilarious to me though. Maybe in this hypothetical lichthund-Hati is physically disabled, or spent most of her life clipped or something.

Oh shit I think Morgan is actually force sensitive. Unless that's all just Hati doing the telepathy. Because it still really fucking feels that Hati isn't force sensitive.

God I can't stop reinterpreting her as a lichthund. This is actually helping me suspend disbelief.

Bro Ahsoka leaving the ship and jumping around in space. Only Ahsoka in this situation could make sense but it still is weird to see. She's wearing a suit thankfully. I know Disney has had people survive outside of ships without them before but I don't like that. I've seen Jedi in space suits in the CW cartoon before and clones wearing spacesuits so I'm not bothered by that but I don't think lightsabers are supposed to handly firepower from ships? Only the fact that she was Anakin's Padawan is making me accept this. Because this sounds like something stupidly dangerous and excessive that he would do. I can fucking hear Obi-wan ribbing them both about it.

Wait why can't Ahsoka propel herself back to the ship using the force? So Leia can do this unconscious but Ahsoka can't? Disney...

Hati apparently being force sensitive and not being able to hit Ahsoka with her ship guns makes sense with my stupid little game where she's a lichthund because manually having to control a gun rather than her own biological weapons would be fairly dysmorphic tho so...

Like the live action purgill designs. Flying around them was cool.

Still cursed with the thought of Hati being a little white fluffy tearstained lichthund that has body dysmorpha though. Fuck I want art of this so bad. Just this fucked up little lichthund (Indigo sized) with wings permanently held resting folded using front legs to man the ship steering looking around with a constant semi deer-in-the-headlights expression. This is canon to me.

Was able to flow along and understand a lot better than the first two episodes. Still not sold on the series but if this turns into the lichthund blorbo development experience I won't be mad.

#text post #sw spoilers #long post #spoilers

[strawbxrryneptune]

Level one

Word count: 10k

Cw: pretty tame, just slight descriptions of a dick, play fighting, mentions of almost dying.

This fic and the fics following will contain monster fucking, cucking and threesomes!! If you are not comfortable, try out some of my other works, but if you wish to proceed, remember, sharing is caring.

@miggiisdumb

Next~♡

♡♡

Being a princess was always portrayed as this lush, lavish life. Spoiled rotten with goodies and suitors on you left and right. Everyone respects you, maybe even fears you, and you don't have to worry about a thing cause you have your guards and your secure little tower.

Only one of those things applied to you. The people of the Mushroom kingdom adored you, sending you gifts and bringing their cute little families to meet you. You had moved out of the actual palace ages ago, deciding to reside in a cute little cottage hidden deep in the woods. 

You had some bodyguards, but you kind of doubted their abilities in warding off monsters. You didn't mind fighting by the side though, it built up your strength and courage. 

You knew that you alone were pretty strong, and so were your guards, but it still confused you how you barely got bothered. Occasionally you would hear a growl or roar in the distance, but it was quickly cut off and you would go about your business. 

You finally found out what was keeping the monsters at bay when you ventured out into the forest alone, not wanting to wake up your bodyguard since you were just getting berries.

You had managed to fill up your basket and make it halfway back before you felt a rush of air behind you, only getting a second to blink before you were sent flying, hot breath and saliva tickling your neck and cheek.

You kick and scream, arms flailing when the creature pushes your head down into the dirt.

You start to weaken as your vision swims, struggling to breathe. You go limp, letting out choked sobs when the creature is suddenly ripped off of you. You hear shuffling and roaring, and then the forest goes silent for a moment before coming back to life, birds chirping and wind blowing as you feel someone touch your arm gently. 

You hear a smooth, low voice fussing over you, the stranger lifting you up and assisting you back to the cottage. You try to turn to see their face, but all you can make out is a bright red hat, dark red hair and pretty lips before they're turning you back around.

When you make it to the cottage, you try to once again turn to thank the person, but they're already gone. About to head back inside, you see a bright red object laying on the ground. When you get closer, you realize it's the strangers hat, soft and big with a K patched into it.

You gasped, realizing who exactly this man was.

You came from a long line of royalty, your mother being Queen Star and your sister being Princess Peach. When you were kids, your mother would tell you of an Italian family who were so kind and brave, always looking to serve and expecting nothing in return.

For your mother, it was a man named Papa Mario, and for Peach it was Mario Jr. And Luigi. Around the time you were born, they also were welcoming a baby into the world, and you have fuzzy memories of a little boy with sharp teeth and red hair vowing to protect you even when you were in diapers.

Snapping back to reality, you scurry back inside and throw on a more casual outfit, still in a dress but with more room to move, slipping on some boots and stuffing the hat in your bag.

You take the path down to town, chatting with the residents along the way until you arrive at the Mario Bros Tavern. 

You step inside, greeting everyone and making your way over to the counter, seeing who you assume is the brother, dressed in all green. His name tag reads "Izuku", and you smile at him when he looks your way. 

"Hi, Princess!! What brings you here?"

You dig in your bag and take out the plush hat, holding it in front of you.

"I- Uh…. I found this in the woods, I was jus' wondering if the owner of it was here?"

Izuku lets out a soft, 'oh', and holds a finger up to you to signal you to wait. He disappears into the back room and when he comes back you suddenly wish you were dressed better.

In the forest all you could see what that your "hero" was wearing overalls and red. You didn't pick up on the fact that he was probably almost 7 feet tall, buff and solid with pretty, full lips and a sharp smile, cute spiky hat hair which a deeper shade of red then his clothes, which fit him so perfect it was like he just stepped out of a clothes factory. 

When you met eyes, the stranger gave you a sheepish smile, stepping up to the counter and gently taking the hat from your now trembling hands. 

"Gee, thanks for bringing this back, Prn'cess. I hadn't even realized I lost it."

You search for words, feeling your cheeks heat up when his smile widens, big veiny hands reaching out to shut your mouth, which fell right back open at the feel of his hands on your face.

"I'm, uh, I'm also here to thank you for saving me today…"

"Kiri."

"Kiri. Thank you, Kiri."

He smiles a toothy smile, giving you a silly bow. You giggle, your heart swelling with affection as you realize you could get used to this.

"As a token of my appreciation, I'm taking you on a date in two days, up by the waterfalls."

The red head blinks in surprise before his smile returns, pink coloring his cheeks as he mods vigorously.

"I'll see you then, Princess!!"

♡♡

You trudged through the forest, cursing yourself for putting off your carriage repair. The trail was under construction, so you had to walk you way through the bushes towards the waterfall. 

At least you weren't wearing a formal dress. You were just wearing a simple skirt and a top, some boots and a picnic basket in your hand.

As you stumble along, you start to hear the roaring of the waterfall, but laced within you hear growls and grunts, followed by a shout that sounded all too familiar.

Kirishima.

You pick up speed and come to a clearing, stepping back slightly in shock. 

In front of you is one of the legendary Bowser men, powerful and downright terrifying. They had a tendency to go after princesses, which was the main reason the Mario brothers protected your family. 

This Bowser was the new heir, Bakugou. He didn't have red hair like his father, his was an ash blonde, and his shell was a slightly darker green. He was taller too, looked about 6'9 from where you were standing, but he towered over Kirishima so you figured he was over 7 feet. He was actually kind of attractive, which surprised you given how his dad looked.

Kirishima has him in a headlock, both of them grunting and growling and you would be lying if the sight wasn't hot, but you shook the feeling off and silently marched over to the two, wanting to "save" the red head like he had for you for the longest time. 

Taking a deep breath, you launched yourself on the Blonde's shell with a shout, quickly realizing how stupid this "plan" was when you could barely hold on, being so small compared to him that when he stood up and reached behind him, he could just pluck you up like a bug, holding by the back of your shirt in a big hand. 

"What happened Bakubro? Why'd you stop-y/n?"

"Well well well, wha d'we have here? Is this the pretty little prn'cess yer were telling me about, Kiri?"

You gulp harshly, not even out of fear anymore now that you realized that they were play fighting, and that they know each other. 

No, you were nervous because Bakugou was hot. Sharp canines digging into his bottom as he watched you dangle in his palm, spiky hair leading down to a bushy mullet, bulging muscles and thick thighs hidden by a ratty loin cloth, blonde happy trail-did something just twitch?

You swiftly look back up, looking into knowing vermillion eyes as he licks his lips and shoots you a smirk, his eyes dark and cheeks slightly flushed. When you feel a slight breeze and begin to rock, you realize that hes still holding you. Up in the air. With one hand. 

This is not doing anything good to your manhandling kink. You can already feel your panties start to get sticky as he gently sets you back down, standing straight back up.

You're now level with his veiny thighs, hands starting to tremble from how guilty and horny you feel. The guy you asked out on a date is right there!! Speaking of, you glance at Kiri and he's already looking at youz something dark gleaming within his eyes but quickly hidden when you meet gazes, rushing forward to trap you in a crushing hug, big hands running up your sides.

You blush as you pull back, about to ask if he wants to get going when he jogs back over to Bakugou, who's eyes haven't left you, and tackles him onto the ground, putting him in a chokehold.

You would be pissed, you planned a picnic and its getting dark, the bugs coming out and the air getting sticky but they look so good like that, muscle on muscle, and Bakugou keeps letting out snarls and growls that go straight to your cunt, slicking up your panties as you think about those big, clawed hands your skirt up and plugging you up with his big dick.

You stop mid thought as you remember what they taught you in Princess survival school, in the monster course. Bowsers can smell really really well. Which means Bakugou….could probably smell you right now. 

You look up at him and let out a breath of relief when you see he's still distracted by the Kirishima, writhing to try and get away from the his grip on his neck. With a sharp movement from the blonde, his loin cloth flutters to the side momentarily and flashes you a peak of his really, really fat cock. You almost pass out from how fast blood rushes to your head when you see so many veins and bumps, and he's obviously not even hard. 

All of a sudden, Bakugou takes a deep breath, preparing to let out a roar to startle Kirishima into letting him go, and chokes on air, gasp getting caught in his throat. Kiri is none the wiser, laughing and joking behind him about how hes strongest, but Bakugou isn't paying attention, eyes blown wide and rolled in his head as his tongue slightly lolls out of his mouth, as if to taste what he's smelling.

To taste you. 

His head rolls to the side, eyes trained on the clench of your thighs and flush of your body, and it make his hips jump, red irises locking onto you as drool spills out of his open mouth. 

Kirishima realized how quiet he is, and attempts to peak over and see if he's okay but Bakugou roughly shoulders him off and stomps away into the trees, leaving you dazed and Kirishima confused. 

"That was weird."

#bakugo smut #bakugou katsuki smut #bakugou smut #bubbletalks #katsuki bakugou smut #bakugou thirst #bakugou x reader #kirishima eijirou smut #bowser!bakugou #mario!kirishima #kirishima x reader #kirishima thirst #kiribaku #prettymiggi🪐

[gyroshrike]

Tell me why you love Gamtav; give me a whole rambling essay if you can. I like seeing people excited over the things and ships they like!

Oh, are you sure you want this? Do you really want to open Pandora's Box? Are you ready for the amount of rambling I can do about GamTav? How much time do you have? Because this is going to be a doozy. I haven't even started writing it and I can tell.

And before I get into it, people gotta know that most of this is based off of pre-murderstuck Gamzee

What do I like about GamTav? What do I like about GamTav??? One of the things that plays into me loving this ship so much is how much I love Gamzee and Tavros as individuals. Whenever I start reading a new piece of media, without question my favorite characters are almost always the really, really nice ones. Boku no Hero Academia? Kirishima. Anohana? Poppo. Legend of Korra? Bolin. And in the beginning of Homestuck, Gamzee and Tavros are just really, really NICE.

Oh, well, Gamzee is really, really nice. When we first see Tavros, he’s being a little shit to the kids, but that's because he was intentionally trying to troll. But once we get into Act 5 and we see Tavros interact with his friends, we realize he's generally a really kind person. His conversations with Nepeta, Gamzee and Aradia are all really sweet. His pesterlog with Vriska, which is the first one we get to see after he is revealed to us as a character, immediately paints a picture of him as someone struggling with his self-esteem and someone who is trying really hard to build himself up as a person. Way to fuckin’ endear me to a character IMMEDIATELY.

For most of the early comic until Act 5, we see all the trolls trolling the kids and even talking shit back and forth to each other. Gamzee was one of the first trolls who we see be purely sweet and supportive to his friends. His first pesterlog after we’re introduced to him is with Karkat and Karkat does nothing but talk shit. xD He does his usual song and dance of saying just the absolute worst things possible in that Karkat way of his and Gamzee just laughs and nods and basically says, “Yeah brother, you go, I love you, you're my best friend.”

We see Gamzee talk with Equius and we already know at this point that Equius is weird, but Gamzee is so jazzed to be talkin’ with his friend. He's just so supportive of Equius and even when Equius tells Gamzee that he must stop doing soper, Gamzee just says, “Okay, sure, you got it, I trust what you're telling me because you're my friend.” Now Equius is not actually ready for Gamzee to listen to him and backtracks and is like, “Wait, no, you don't have to listen to me, let's roleplay instead,” and Gamzee's like, “I don't know how to roleplay, but I'll try for you bro.” He’s just really fucking cute???

Short version: When we meet them, Tavros is someone you want to root for and Gamzee is just the nicest guy on the planet.

Gamzee loves his friends so much and from early on it's made apparent that he wants to love and support them, and would honestly do a lot for them even if he doesn't know what he's doing.

Also along with just being a generally sweet guy Tavros is the nerd archetype I love? He loves the troll equivalent of Pokemon and card games and other things like that. Also he just really loves animals? And I always love the characters who love animals. It's a really big weakness I have. Not to mention, talking with them? That's so COOL? So badass??? Like, UM???? He could control them, but he doesn't like forcing them to do bad things against their will. (Going off of how when suggested he control the imps to defeat them, but feels like that would be unfair/mean.)

SPEAKING OF THE IMPS. Of the twelve trolls, Tavros and Gamzee are the two of them who BEFRIENDED their imps. Isn't that so fucking rad????? They both started off fighting them at first, but then they both later mention that they are able to chill with their imps instead. Gamzee shares pie with them and Tavros communicates with them using his powers. I freaking LOVE that parallel. When I first noticed it I almost keeled over. See, I'm also a sucker for characters who like to attempt peace before conflict, so of course I'm going to love that both of them made friends instead of enemies.

So Act 5 Homestuck has already set me up to basically completely love these two characters. Now, I am a really big shipper. In almost every piece of media I go into I generally come out with ships and that's a big way that I engage with fandom. Now Homestuck, I actually didn't ship that much at first when I first started reading, which is pretty strange for me. I think I just kind of let the ships fall into my lap up until that point. I know my brain had really enjoyed the ideas of Karkat and Terezi, Dave and Terezi, and had even teased inklings of "What if?" and "Oh, I like them," about Rose and Kanaya. But for the most part I wasn't really into Homestuck for shipping at first.

The concept of GamTav, or PBJ as it was more commonly referred to then, was introduced to me by my friends. I had two irl friends who were reading the comic with me and they were ahead of me by some decent amount of pages at the time. At one point they started making references to PBJ and really liking PBJ and I was a little confused because I didn't quite know what they were referring to at first. I learned pretty soon that PBJ was Gamzee and Tavros and I remember being really excited for the ship because it was the first time I'd seen my friends get that excited for a ship. Which is really funny because now in the twilight years of the Homestuck fandom, of the three of us, I'm the only one gripping white-knuckled onto GamTav and breathing it like my life depends on it, while the other two have moved on to much different things. If I'm being honest, I'm pretty sure one of them doesn't even really like Gamzee that much anymore, but respects how much I love him and lets me rant and rave to her about him whenever I want.

It wasn't long after that that I finally got to the infamous "Make out a little" conversation between Gamzee and Tavros. I read the pesterlog and suddenly everything I had seen and heard from my friends made sense. I mean, not that I'm saying that's the ONLY reason GamTav makes sense. I just mean I understood what my friends specifically were talking about. Of the pesterlogs we've seen between them before that, Gamzee and Tavros obviously had a decent friendship. I'm pretty sure in the comic Gamzee was the first person to have a pesterlog with Tavros who is genuinely nice to him. (And this is conversation happens directly after Tavros’ conversation with Vriska, so it’s a wild contrast.) So as a friendship, I was already super down with Gamzee and Tavros-- you know what? Now that I think about it, I feel like I remember in [S] Make Her Pay being disappointed that Gamzee and Tavros were fighting alone and not with each other. Because a lot of the other trolls had paired up to be cool duos, you know? We had Karkat and Terezi, Feferi and Sollux, Nepeta and Equius, and I think I remember being bummed that Gamzee and Tavros weren't paired up. So I, at the very least, think I wanted things for these two even if I hadn't stepped into the realm of actually shipping them yet. I don't remember, this was YEARS ago.

Anyway, the infamous makeout conversation happens, and I'm sold hard for life. I have a lot of other Homestuck ships that I'm into and I enjoy, but none have ever, ever, ever, ever come close to GamTav.

I realize that I've written so much and I still haven't gotten to the meat of why I like them.

So I like ships where the parties involved are best friends. I love it when the characters in a ship are bros who love hanging out, who love doing silly things together. That awesome video "What your favorite Homestuck ship says about you" had me dead to rights. Called me out so hard. My ideal ship dynamic is "being stupid together"? Way to come for the throat. That's exactly it. At their core, Gamzee and Tavros are one of the funnest bro combinations I have ever seen. And what makes them so fun is both of them are huge dorks. HUGE dorks.

When we first meet Gamzee, he stares off into the colors of his miracle modus while making the most ridiculous face, tries to unicycle but just fuckin' pieruettes right off if it because his legs are too short, and just straight up reaches into his modus with his bare hands. Don't even get me started on how he scares himself with his own horns. That shit kills me.

We've already talked about how Tavros is a huge nerd, so that's covered. But like… have you heard him rap? This guy just gets so into it and has so much fun while simultaneously sounding so silly. He's flirty and awkward and ridiculous and has this shit eating grin on all the time.

They are those two friends who get up to shenanigans where everyone else around them just kind of shakes their head and thinks that they're so dumb (in an affectionate way), but they don't care because all they DO care about is how much fun they're having together.

One of my favorite things about Homestuck in general is it lets its characters be bad at things. John and Karkat suck at coding. Gamzee, Tavros, and Dave are bad at rapping. Rose becomes a prolific author, but I would argue she's bad at writing when she's 13 because, wow is it a slog to get through her wizard fanfiction LMAO.

And GamTav is a perfect example of two people who just have fun together being bad at things together. There's no pretense of needing to be cool or needing to be good at something or any type of shame or embarrassment. They're just so silly and they don't mind being silly around each other and they never make the other person ashamed of who they are. We even see some of that last bit in the comic. Gamzee never puts Tavros down. In one conversation, he acknowledges Tavros' disability, but doesn't taunt Tavros for it, doesn't make it a joke, or make him feel bad. It's just acknowledged and then they move on. Then Tavros mentions that while he doesn't share Gamzee's religious or spiritual views, he is supportive of them. I am such a sucker for shit like that.

In every way, shape, and form, Gamzee and Tavros are supportive of each other and just and totally uplift the other person. Both of these characters go through so much verbally (both jokingly and maliciously) at the hands of their peers for being who they are that Gamzee and Tavros' conversations were so refreshing to just see them be unabashedly themselves with another person.

And they make each other happy! Tavros' first conversation with Gamzee was the first time we see where Tavros is purely elated to be talking to the person he is talking to. And Tavros obviously makes Gamzee really happy. They just make each other so happy! And I love that shit!

Gamzee is, without restraint, supportive of everything that is Tavros. Gamzee is the type of person who would look at anything Tavros wants to do or is trying to do and put his whole heart in supporting Tavros and telling him, "Yeah bro, you can do this, you're amazing, I love you, go get 'em, you're the best, you can do anything you put your mind to,” and I love that for Tavros.

Gamzee was the friend I spent all of Homestuck wishing Tavros had. Tavros spent so much time talking to Vriska, interacting with Vriska, adventuring with Vriska. And that entire time I was just wishing that Gamzee was there instead, just so Tavros would have someone to be nice to him.

After murderstuck, I spent years waiting for Gamzee and Tavros to meet in a dream bubble. That was all I wanted. I wanted Gamzee to have to look Tavros in the eye and face what he had done, own up to everything to the person he loved most in the world. But of course, post murderstuck, Gamzee gets everything stripped away from him that made him the character he was in the beginning. It wasn't even a satisfying villain arc! It was just confusing! I feel like I could have dealt with it if Gamzee was a well-rounded villain. But instead his entire villain shtick was just surrounded by a bunch of question marks! I spent all of Homestuck waiting to learn what exactly was going on with Gamzee and then we never got that and that fucked me up.

And of course, oh, of course, up until the very end of the series, in the very, very, very last animation we ever see, Homestuck Act 7, Tavros is standing by Vriska's side, as he has had to do since the very beginning.

I haven't read the epilogues or Homestuck 2, so I'm not going to touch on anything that happens in those series and I would appreciate it if no one responded to this with spoilers. Don't even tell me things like, "Oh, you'll like Gamzee," or "Oh, you'll hate Gamzee," or anything like that. I don't want any hints. I already got enough. I want to form my own opinion when I finally get the energy to go in.

Nowadays, I stick almost exclusively to humanstuck AU's for my GamTav. Because even if canon GamTav wasn't so sad and depressing, there are other things that make me way too sad to think about. As a bronze blood, Tavros's lifespan is going to be significantly shorter than Gamzee's. No matter the good or bad context surrounding their relationship. Even if they were the perfect, fluffy, happy couple in canon, I can't deal with that lifespan difference. It breaks my goddamn heart.

I live in a world where I can rewrite the circumstances surrounding these characters and make it play out in a way that is much more to my liking. Writing them in humanstuck AU's lets me take away all of the things that make my heart hurt and instead repurpose them for really meaningful, emotional character building arcs and that's my main focus when it comes to GamTav.

Something I'm also really picky with when it comes to this ship is that I need the core of Gamzee and Tavros' character growth to happen apart from each other. I have found that I don't like stories that center Gamzee and Tavros or their relationship as the pivotal point of their development. I don't like when Gamzee is the pillar of Tavros' confidence. I do like when Gamzee helps out building Tavros' confidence by being supportive and saying nice things and encouraging him, but I don't like it when he is the main source. I don't want Tavros' growth to be hinged on Gamzee being in his life.

The same goes for Gamzee. I don't like stories where Tavros is the one thing keeping Gamzee from doing bad things. I don't like when their relationship is framed as being the one thing keeping Gamzee from going murder mode all over his friends again. I've read fics where Gamzee struggles either with murderous instincts as a troll or mental health as a human and Tavros is one of the only things that keeps him from going off the deep end. I don't like that. I want Gamzee's growth to be primarily on his own or at the very least not supported by his romantic partner. Of course, I love it when Tavros is there when he needs him to hold him or soothe him or say kind things or help him through his struggles. I'm not saying I don't want Tavros to comfort him at all or ever, I just don't want Tavros to be his sole anchor.

I just love idiot best friends in love.

Oh, OH! ALSO. Gamzee doesn’t give a FUCK about the hemospectrum. One of the first things he says to Equius is how he doesn’t get it, how he’s not better than anyone else, how he doesn’t even know how to ACT better than anyone else. How am I not supposed to love that?

Opposite sides of the hemospecturm relationships are so fun. I love the idea of Gamzee entering a room full of strangers and them being like “Oh no! :O !!!! Scary subjuggulator!!” and Tavros comes rushing over all happy and excited and they just snuggle all cute and gross and everyone watching’s jaw just drops.

This might sound weird, but I also think one of the things that endear me to characters is them getting misinterpreted and then me having fun drawing them more ‘accurately’? Tavros is so often depicted as uwu soft weepy boi and I love drawing him with a mischievous grin just as ready to do something stupid and get himself into trouble as Gamzee is. Equius TOLD Tavros not to go near the stairs with his new robo legs. What is one of the things Tavros does immediately? Go try the fuckin’ stairs. And he KEEPS DOING IT.

*lays down on the floor* I just… I just want domestic GamTav where they move into a nice wheelchair accessible home (modified in a similar way to Tavros' hive in Pesterquest) and Gamzee massages Tav's back when it aches and tells him he's the light of his life and in turn Tavros holds Gamzee close on his darker days and Tavros kisses his hands and brushes his hair out of his eyes and boops his nose and they laugh so hard together that they cry.

#homestuck #gamtav #gamzee x tavros #gamzee makara #tavros nitram #hs pbj #homestuck pbj #asks for me #anon #HERE IS IS ANON #RAMBLY AS ALL HELL

[ticklishpeter]

bro time (diego/ben/klaus)

ANOTHER FIC!!! and yes it’s very self-indulgent but GOD i had so much fun writing it so ofc i gotta share!!!! enjoy, babies!!

summary:  diego’s a grump (yes, again), klaus is determined to fix that, even if only for a little while. and who better to drag along then sweet benjamin, right?

word count: 2,430

Diego had always been a total downer. It was never out of the ordinary to see a scowl on his face or to hear an annoyed sigh or two, typically pointed at Klaus. Sure, Diego had gotten a bit softer since they got back from the 1960s, but his siblings’ antics never quite changed, and therefore, neither did his frequent bad mood. 

It was a lazy, uneventful day around the mansion. Klaus had plans though; plans to daydrink himself into a coma in the living room. When he made his way to the room, though, he noticed a frowning Diego laying on the couch and throwing his knife up and down in the air. Immediately, running away from the doorway, he pressed his back to the wall next to it, before spotting Ben in the kitchen.

“Pst, hey,” he hissed as he threw a crumpled up receipt from his pocket towards the bar, where his dead brother stood, reading some book that Klaus definitely didn’t care about.

Ben rolled his eyes with a sigh and looked up from his book, “What?” He already sounded annoyed with whatever Klaus was planning.

“Dontcha think Diego’s been…” Klaus leaned against the bar next to him, “I dunno, kinda super grumpy lately?”

Ben’s eyes pointed to the living room, leaning slightly to catch a glimpse of the brother in question, “I mean, yeah but he always is. It’s Diego.”

“I know, I know, but hey, ‘nother question for ya. Remember how crazy ticklish he was when we were kids?” Klaus couldn’t help but laugh at the memory of Ben being the designated pinner while the rest of the siblings tormented their knife-wielding brother to hysteria with tickles. He also decided to disregard Ben’s noticeable reaction to the dreaded t-word. 

Ben squinted up at him from his book, a small smirk on his face. And that was enough for Klaus to know that he was in, “Okay, yes. I’ll help you, but only because this story’s getting boring.” Not because he missed having fun with his siblings; definitely not that.

The ghost made his way into the room first, and sat across Diego’s knees with a sigh, but an unmistakably playful glint in his eye. 

“Hey, broskidoodle!” Klaus exclaimed, seemingly out of nowhere, “You're still ticklish, right?”

Immediately upon hearing the words and seeing the look on Klaus’ face, Diego tried to get up but only his upper half left the couch. “What - hey! What the hell, man?” 

“Oh, yeah! Ben’s here, he says hello!” The former cult-leader gestured towards the invisible figure that had been holding Diego down. “Anyway, you’ve been a total grump for like, ever. And I just wanna see you smile for once, DiDi!” Without hesitation, Klaus experimentally grabbed at one of his thighs, giggling at the yelp and twitch that followed. 

Diego was already frantically struggling to escape, “No — fuck off!” His eyes stayed glued on the hands that hovered now, over his sides, as he sucked in his stomach as far away as he could get it.

“Of course you’re still ticklish. What was I thinking? There’s no way you could’ve outgrown that, right? As ticklish as you were, whew,” Klaus whistled, “You were such a little wiggleworm… and a giggleworm, wasn’t he, Benny?” 

Ben nodded with a small laugh. He loved having a positive memory that he could share with all of his siblings. It was nice to reminisce every now and then.

Diego then smacked Ben’s back (or where he thought Ben’s back was) and attempted to slap Klaus’ face, ultimately missing and making a fool of himself, “Sh-Shut up.” An accidental giggle slipped through his lips as he watched Klaus’ fingers wiggle teasingly a few inches above his stomach. He squeezed his eyes shut in anticipation, which ended up being a terrible idea, as he couldn’t see when Klaus decided to attack. 

He screamed at the feeling of Klaus’ blunt nails scribbling around his ribs, and practically jumped out of his skin when another hand poked at his thigh. Opening one eye, he flinched when his brother teasingly shot the hand towards an armpit, only to move back down to his thigh, and then back up to skitter his fingers on his neck. Twitching and jerking away at every little touch, Diego felt his face get warm, “Fucking — quit it, you little shits!” 

Much to Diego’s relief, Klaus actually… stopped? Before he started really giggling too, which Diego praised every God and Goddess in existence for.

“Now if I remember correctly, you always used to hate it when we tickled you right about…” Klaus tapped his chin. “Was it here?” A knowing poke to Diego’s stomach was all it took to draw a squeal out of Diego’s mouth.

“No,” he yelled, sounding more like a a squeak than he hoped it would, “Fuck!”

Lifting his hands above Diego again, Klaus teasingly jerked his arms forward, absolutely relishing in how violently Diego flinched. He did his little trick again. A squeak. And again. A yelp. And again. A giggle, “Ihi’ll - I’ll fucking kill you.”

“Ah,” Klaus clapped his hands, his voice high-pitched and teasy, “there’s those cute little sounds I remember! I’m not even touching you, silly!” He couldn’t help but laugh as his brother flinched and snorted when he wiggled his fingers again. 

“Shut up, Klaus, I swear to God -”

Ignoring him, Klaus grinned, “Yeah? Tell him I say hi. — Do you have a ticklish tummy, Diego? Does wittle Diego have a tickwish tummy?”

“Sh-sh-shut up!” Diego grunted again through another giggle, shaking his head. The giggles were starting to get overwhelming. 

“Uh, oh! Number Two’s got a case of the giggles!” His obnoxiously teasy brother cooed as he began to place maddening pinches all over his stomach, “What an unfortunate combo; a case of the giggles, and a ticklish tummy?” 

His flailing arms were torn between covering his face or guarding his midsection as he twisted his body as much as he could. The teasing made things ten times worse for the ticklish vigilante. “I-I don’t! Ihi don’t!” 

“Yes you do! I know it.” He was endlessly amused at the other’s frantic reactions to a few mere pokes and squeezes. “All you have to do,” Klaus laughed along with his screaming brother, “is tell me you have a ticklish tummy, Mr. Giggles, and then I'll stop!” 

Was that all he had to do? The other’s continuous teasing tone in his voice made Diego’s face heat up as he grunted, “Okay, I do! Now let me go!” Anything to make it stop.

“You do, what?” Klaus raised his eyebrows, digging his fingers into the sweet spot right below his ribs, on the side of his stomach. Of course it wasn’t going to be that easy.

“Youhou know what, asshole! Fucking stop!” Attempting to kick Ben off of him, Diego turned his head away, his long hair already totally messed up. 

Shaking his head, Klaus hummed in the most obnoxiously nonchalant manner, “Mm-mm, nope, you gotta tell me what you've got right here!” 

“J-Jesus,” he snorted before covering his face in embarrassment with his arm, his other hand weakly attempting to push Klaus’ goddamn fingers away. Said goddamn fingers moved quickly up to his armpit, though, causing his arm to shoot back downwards. The giggles that left his mouth were practically uncontrollable at this point as he turned his head into his shoulder, “S-s-s-sensitive! I- fuck,” he squealed. “Okay, okay, my stomach is s-sensitive, goddammit! Ben! Get off of me!” Falling back into his giggle fit, Diego covered his face with both arms now, squirming and twisting as much as he could.

Ben laughed amusedly, wishing he could join in on the teasing, but settled for fluttering his ghostly fingers around Diego’s sides.

“Ah-ah-ah,” Klaus clicked his tongue, giving his brother’s lower tummy some rhythmic pokes, resulting in both arms coming down again, “That doesn't sound like what I told you to say, Blushy McBlusherson!” Klaus squeezed a quickly moving clawed hand right over Diego’s bellybutton. “Say it! Say you have a ticklish tummy, and I'll set you free! It’s not that difficult, I know you can do it!” he cooed as if Diego was a small child, and he was the tickle monster.

Diego yelped at the teases and threw two consecutive punches at Klaus’ shoulder before his hands flew down to grab the hand in the middle of his stomach, “God! Fuck, you're such a DICK! I h-h-hate - ugh!” he whined at his stutter mixed with the giggles. He hated how much power Klaus - fucking Klaus - had over him right now. The growl that left his grinning mouth turned quickly into a strangled choking noise, and then a downpour of giggles when he felt Klaus’ finger make his way into his bellybutton. Thrashing around, Diego gasped. “Klaus! Don’t you fucking - FUCK! Not there! - ACK, Jesus!” He had way too much pride to say the words that Klaus wanted him to, but said pride was quickly fleeting as he squirmed, immediately tensing up, and instinctually trying to curl in on himself.

“Oh nooo, I think Mr. Pointer Finger’s stuck in there! ‘Help, help!’” Klaus cried in a higher pitched voice as he moved his stupid finger-character around. He couldn't help but aim a poke at Ben’s back, remembering how much he'd performed the same act with him when they were young.

Diego couldn't do anything but cackle and cover his face. Ben bucked, almost losing his balance as Diego kicked furiously. “Stop it! Fucking - God,” he squealed and gasped, a hiccup escaping somewhere in the midst of all of his desperate sounds. “Ihi - SHIT! FUCK! I -” Another snort was muffled slightly by both of his hands covering his face, a full 5 seconds of laughter passed before he managed to ramble, “Ihavea-EEP-t-t-ticklishtummy! ACK! FUHUCK! F-F-...Fucking stop it!” He attempted a growl or two to sound more adult than he currently felt and sounded. Just saying the words, however fast and rambly, was absolutely unbearable for Diego. 

Klaus’ silly voice drowned in the volume of Number Two’s laughter as he continued to wiggle his finger in his bellybutton, giving a few pinches to his waistline. 

“STOP! STOP, KLAUS, PLEASE!” Diego shrieked and shook his head before falling into silent frantic laughter. A hiccup, and a weak “Please!” were the only audible things to leave his mouth as he smacked at the floor next to him. 

Klaus, feeling particularly ruthless today, decided to mess with not just the one, but two of his brothers, who both just happened to be astoundingly ticklish. A squeeze to Ben’s side was all it took to get him to squeak and fall off of Diego's shaking legs.

“Aww, look at my two ticklish little brothers!” Klaus cooed at the two squirming men with a laugh, as one hand stayed put, still tormenting Diego’s ‘tickle-button’ (as Grace once called it when they were kids, and no one let him live it down) another wandering hand spidered its way up and down Ben’s hypersensitive ribs.

“Hey, Diego!” Calling over the laughter from the two of them, Klaus leaned over a squirmy Diego, “Diego, how many tickles does it take to make Ben laugh?” No answer, obviously. He wasn’t even sure that Diego could hear him. But Ben could.

“Klaus! God, shut up!” he curled up, knowing exactly what was coming. “Ten-tickles! Hahahahaha!” Klaus laughed in a mocking manner as he grinned and spidered five fingers on his side, “A-one,” he moved to his other side, “A-two,” a poke to the bellybutton made Ben squeal, “A-three,” Klaus continued alternating between different spots as he counted up to ten, laughing at Ben’s squirms and strangled sounds between helpless laughter. 

He also continued tickling in and around Diego’s bellybutton, occasionally poking around his upper stomach. “How’s it going over there, pillsbury knife boy?”

A hiccup came before a frustrated noise, before Diego switched back into silent laughter, “I’m -” he gasped for whatever air he could get, “I’m dying, Klaus, fucking st - hic - stooop! P-PLEASE I’ll do anything! Hic - I’ll - I’ll do anything, just — stohohop.” 

Klaus finally let up once he noticed a few tears falling from his closed eyes, which meant he’d succeeded in getting Diego to laugh. Like, … really, really laugh. And that meant his job was done. He took advantage of the time taken with Diego’s residual giggles to squeeze Ben’s ribs one last time.  “Aww, move your hands, Benerino, you know I love your little blushy face!” 

“Okay, okay, Klaus, plehease!” He moved both of his hands down to try and stop the tickling ones, only to be caught off-guard by Klaus squeaking and twitching dramatically. Whatever had happened caused him to lose his balance. Wait. Ben noticed his hand next to Klaus’ left hip before smiling, and squeezing at it before Klaus could get back up.

“BEN!” Klaus screeched, rolling onto his stomach. Bad idea, because Ben sat across his legs now, and now he had full access to not only his hips and armpits, but also his back. His three worst spots. 

“What an inconvenience, Klaus,” Ben teased, poking at both of his hips with both free hands. He couldn’t help but notice Diego lean up on an elbow, still panting, but smiling at the opportunity for revenge.  “A case of the giggles, and a pair of ticklish… hips, … armpits,” his hands flew to Klaus’ underarms digging into the bare skin, “and a super ticklish back, if I remember correctly.” 

Klaus yelped, choking out a loud cackle when he felt the terribly light scribbles around his upper back. Arching his back, Klaus batted at the floor beneath him, acting almost as if he was trying to claw his way out from under Ben. “Stop it, you sh- shiteater!” He squealed loudly when he felt another pair of hands scribble under his arms. Upon pressing his cheek to the floor to see what was happening, it was Diego with, coincidentally, the most shit-eating grin he’d seen in awhile.

“GUHUYS!” He cackled, the sound akin to that of a witch, even louder when Ben’s far-too-tangible hands made his way back to his hips, “OHOKAY, OKAY! I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry. — I promise!”

His two ticklish brothers let up, likely due to weakness from all the laughter they were doing beforehand, but also because they knew Klaus didn’t mind the tickling so they’d be here forever if they didn’t stop. 

“But you gotta admit it was kinda fun, right?” Klaus shrugged with a smile. He could tell that Ben and Diego were smiling too.

Hmm, maybe being there forever wouldn’t be too bad.

#tickle fic #tua tickle fic #ticklish!diego #ticklish!ben #ticklish!klaus #HERE SHE IS #ENJOY PLS!!!! and say smth nice/reblog if ya like it!! it'd mean a lot <3 <3 <3 #my fics

[ofwolvesandbutterflies]

problem #7

Pairing: Johnny Seo x Reader

Genre: like a dash of angst

Tags: college!au, mathmajor!johnny, unrequited!reader

Warnings: lil bit of language. 

day 14 of 30 days with NCT

Synopsis: in which nothing makes more sense than you and Johnny... except you’re the only one that see’s it. 

// why must I fall for you? // (x) 

--

[16:03]

You couldn’t do it. Not again. But you also couldn’t afford to fail math this semester. And it hurt being stuck like this. Fuck, it hurt like no one’s business. 

Calculus didn’t hurt, no, you weren’t frustrated at the math. Granted, math had always hurt your brain to a certain extent, but it wasn’t the center of your misery this time. Still, at this point, the only thing you could do was smile, endure it for a little bit longer while you sat beside him. The movements - smiling and nodding as if you were actually listening, as if you could just listen - came easy now. Another thoughtless smile, just another hollow nod, really all you had to do was occasionally look back down and rewrite whatever nonsense Johnny had just spewed about definite integrals, pretending with all remaining strength in your exhausted body that you could survive this. 

When you had first complained to Taeil a couple weeks ago about not understanding any of the mathematical concepts presented during your ‘stupid math class, why am I even learning this? I don’t need integrals for what I’m planning on doing during life’… you hadn’t expected him to shoot you an unfamiliar cell phone number. He had followed up the untitled contact saying that one of his friends was a math major, and worked by appointment as a tutor. 

Initially, you had been more than ecstatic. God forbid you fail another math class. So, upon bidding your older friend a grateful farewell, you pulled your phone out, number already dialed and saved as ‘math tutor’. But, once the third dial tone stopped mid-ring… only to be replaced by the same, unmistakable voice of… Of him. 

Part of you wanted to hang up the moment he spoke into the receiver. In a flash, the day’s optimism ran sour and all your civil sense for pleasantries disintegrated. “Hello?” And oh, his voice sounded just as suave, just as chivalrous and polite as the day you last saw him. Every memory of him from his laugh when you said something silly to the times he’d walk you home late at night or let you borrow a sweatshirt because you so conveniently ‘forgot one’... All of the hurt you had tried so hard to forget, suppress and push away the last couple years came rushing back in a torrent of mind-numbing pain. Your fragile heart clenched, almost daring you to hang up, stuff it all back into the cold heart you had yet to let anyone touch, and yet you still answered. Told him very bluntly a ‘friend’ had recommended him for tutoring. Briefed him on the concepts you were struggling with and when you were free. Asked him what his rates were. 

Fortunately or unfortunately (you didn’t know which was more appropriate), he recognized your voice and chuckled. “Y/N? Oh man, it is you! How you been? Damn, it’s been so long since I’ve last heard from you and the first thing you ask about is how much it’s gonna cost for tutoring? I’ve been doing well, thanks so much for asking. Man, I thought we were friends, bro.” Again, the sour taste of melancholy filled your mouth. Friends. Right. Just as you were all of two years ago, Johnny still considered you one of the ‘bro’s’. Jaw clenched and lips pressed into a firm line, your grip on your phone grew tighter until your knuckles turned white. “But, absolutely. Totally available to help a friend out. I’m free most afternoons and don’t even worry about the money. Anyways, does tomorrow from around 3 to 5 work? We can meet at the coffee shop in the student center.” 

With no other choice for academics and an overwhelmingly unwillingness to look for anything else, you agreed.  

Johnny Seo didn’t know he broke your heart. Or, at least, you never told him your heart ever belonged to him and you had never told anyone else, so there was no chance he could have known. It had been a couple years prior the day you first met Johnny. Like everyone else, you were younger and you were much more confident in your ability to recover from the bitterness of rejection. Tall, handsome, bilingual, and muscular, you were immediately taken by his grace and charm, his easy going nature and well balanced personality. He was easy to talk to, he radiated confidence, and he made you feel at home. Johnny was home to you. At least, until he introduced you one day as one of his ‘best friends’ to a beautiful young woman around his age, smiling brightly as she released her hand from his to shake yours. 

The first time you met up for math had your shoes dragging along the pavement and your shoulders hunched over. Your stomach had tied, unraveled, and re-tied itself in knots the longer you sat there, hair brushed and slightly styled, face partially made up, and clean clothes wrinkling under your clenching fists. He appeared out of nowhere, strolling happily up to the table with a freshly pressed cardigan and collarless button down that made him even more attractive than you remembered. 

And it was as if nothing ever changed. As if your feelings had never existed. As if the couple years you had gone without him were void and null. Johnny was as bright and helpful as always, the best teacher, patient and understanding. It made you feel worse. But your understanding in the outlandish concepts of higher maths improved somewhat, so you met him again, finding - with disdain - that the beat of your heart seemed to speed up the more seconds passed by as you stood in front of the library, wrapped in a cute dress you remembered was his favorite color. 

But the more you met up, the more you saw the ways his eyes scrunched up into little crescents every time he smiled, the more you found yourself laughing with him when he botched an explanation... the more you realized… you had never been able to move on. 

He texted you, one afternoon, a few days ago, that he would have to reschedule your meeting to today. His girlfriend was flying back into town and he needed to pick her up from the airport. All you could really do was reassure him that it was okay. You understood. 

And yet here you were. Biting back tears as you nodded along, gaze trained down towards your paper. You hadn’t bothered with make up or a cute outfit today. Your hair - though brushed - hung loose around your face, shielding you from his terribly oblivious gaze. You swallowed another looming sob. At least you wouldn’t fail math this semester. 

#cznnet #nct #nct scenarios #nct oneshot #nct imagines #nct fanfic #nct x reader #nct fluff #nct angst #nct u #nct 127 #nct johnny #nct johnny scenarios #nct johnny imagines #nct johnny fanfic #nct johnny x reader #nct johnny fluff #nct johnny angst #nct johnny seo #johnny #johnny seo #johnny seo imagines #johnny seo fanfic #johnny seo fluff #johnny seo x reader #johnny seo angst #johnny scenarios #johnny imagines #johnny x reader #johnny fanfic

[huntsman-ash]

LiveThoughts: RWBY V8E6

Second attempt at this since last time Chrome just DIED for no reason...

Im going to put literally the entire thing with Cinder under one note; Called it.

Its a great set of stuff, sure, but it doesnt relaly tell us anything we didnt already know about Cinder, and I personally feel it doesnt really explain why she turned out the way she did. I feel like we’ve had another weird twist of the situation again...M+K? Coronas fault? Who knows. Either way, this section isnt great by my taste and I kinda skipped most of it. 

Few things to note though; Apperently in Mistral scrubbing by hand is still more viable floor cleaning tech than using Dust.

The wind vane on the roof has the Rooster Teeth symbols rooster on it. 

The hotel Cinder is bought by is named the Glass Unicorn, fittingly enough for...several reasons. 

The coffees behind the stepsisters when we first see them are the animated versions of the real life stuff RT put out just before this season went live. 

No one seems to notice the fact cinder has orange eyes. I wonder if weird eye colors are just a THING in Remnant?

The control collar/shock thing is incredibly inefficient in design, since it doesnt actually hold on to her very well. A more effective brace/choker design would have worked better.

The song that goes on during all of this is...kind of obvious and a little bland? Fitting for younger Cinder I guess. 

Mmm. Random greasy huntsman. 

I guess in Atlas its fine to laugh at struggling teenagers?

Im going to assume there’s a 3+ year gap here where she gets older, cause she stops being smol and gets closer to how we see her now.

Also even here, in Atlas...really? The most effective way to clean these carpeted floors is to have a TEENAGER SCRUB THEM BY HAND?

How do you scrub...I assume its carpet anyway?

And how you tell civilians are lame in Atlas; they are impressed...by a sword.  Just a sword. A boring, half-cut sword. Losers.

I assume this would be Cinder’s semblance manifesting. Also note on the desk; “we do not serve faunus”. Well THAT doesnt surprise me.

HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEHEHEHEHE. Get fucked Cinder. HEHEHEHEHEHEHEHEHE

I dont even feel pity for her, this is funny to me.  Also the fact that this kind of shit aCTUALLY EXISTS is...amusing to me. Like, really? So I guess indentured servitude is a thing in Remnant too. 

And this is why Cinder likes to use swords. Really. Wow. LAMEO.

Huh. Dual maces. Interesting. Thats a prety cool weapon.  Looks like they open up too. Bet he could bash some skulls with that.

“Hurting them isnt going to make your life any better”. Um, excuse me? I think hurting them is the very best thing to do in this situation. At least, for the moment anyway. 

Huh. So she’s ten at this point? Even as a child, shes older than she looks. 

And training montage. Huh. Or at least I assume it is. I get the feeling being able to go where you want too and do what you want too is the main reason Hunters exist. There must be crazy tight immigration laws...or, maybe, its just that traveling between kingdoms is stupid dangerous cause of Grimm. I think the latter is most likely considering every form of public transit extra-kingdom we’ve seen (even between cities, see Argus Limited) has some kind of defensive weaponry. Limited and ineffective, for th emost part oddly.

So you can take the exam at 18. Okay cool. Pre-that must be prep school. Wonder what happens if you wash out? Also I like how this dude is just “yeah, 7 years of training, we got this.”

I think this is the first time we’ve seen the other side of the moon. Or at least, the proper other side...bloody hell I STILL dont know how all those piesces are still held in place, the thing looks like it should start yeeting bolides at Remnant. 

Better still we see it MOVE, rotate in time to the passing of years. So it literally does rotate on its own axis, and more importantly, unlike OUR moon, its NOT tidally locked. We only ever see the same side of our moon. REmnants rotates MUCH faster. Also it doesnt seem to have phases like ours does. I’ll check on why that is. 

Well at least we have an explanation for why Cinders so damn good at fighting people. Trained by an Atlas Huntsman.

Also as a note the device is quite literally just an electrical Dust crystal attached to a necklace. Things the most inefficent torture device Ive ever fucking seen. 

Wonder how often they have to change the crystal.

And there goes the moon rotating again.

I like how NO ONE comment on the blade going missing and that guy never came back for it. I guess he must have just bought a new one.

I get the very distinct feeling they wont just let her go honestly, permission or not. 

AWWW WE DONT EVEN GET TO SEE CINDER MURDER THE SISTERS. Also no blood. Odd.  Good kill on the  stepmother though. Oh, that NECK CRACK.  I like how all the bitch can do is try and shock Cinder, like, uh...adrenaline up? SHE HAS A SWORD? MAYBE FIGHT BACK?

Hah. Weak ass fuckin Atlas people.  Also the clock going off in the back ground twelve times. How fitting. Welcome to midnight. 

Also shes kind of glowing here cause the room is dark, and I find it amusing this is probably the last time she wears white.

And THERES the Cinder we know

Sick ass music, cool. Also THAT is an interesting semblance...I guess he turns himself to metal? Also DAMN his aura broke after THAT? Hes a Huntsman...ah who cares. Again probably in Cinders memory more than anything. Which at this point is probably about as reliable as a coked up hookers.

SHANKED. Sucker. You shoulda seen THAT one coming.

And thats all it took to get the shock collar off. Lol. 

So what happened to the hotel? Did they just...write it off? I mean four people got murdered in there...

And now we’re back on the whale. HOW THE SCREAMING FUCK DID CINDER JUST...

Wow. She just got up after eating that blast. Fucking plot armor.

Merc making the hard calls honestly.  Im actually gonna watch all of this now which is nice because I want to know whats happening in the real world. PITY MORE THAN HALF THE EPISODE WAS THIS FUCKING FILLER.

I like how Cinder just...goes quiet the moment she realizes shes lost Mercury. Not that he was USEFUL mind you but if I had to guess she liked being the boss. But now shes...basically back where she started. 

So the whale is basically a ship. It has a bridge. Probably Salems throne room.

Man, Oscars literally just RTs punching bag this season isnt he? Literally in this case. 

His clothes are still scortched too which I find interesting.  The black eyes also staying. Auras not back up then? Aura repair and regen seems...werid half the time. Like RT does what they want with it.

Ah so someone finally says it...but at the same time what exactly does Salem have to fear? If she cant fight the whole world...what could they do? Maybe overwhelming her? It...Im having a hard time putting the “she cant be stopped” with “shes afraid of fighting all of Remnant”. 

Somethings missing here. I know it.

The sound of the “door” opening reminds me of the Flood doors in High Charity in Halo 3s Cortana. Fleshy twisting.

Mention from Hazel, but AGAIN...no details. I guess if you nail down how she can do stuff its harder to write? 

Glad someone made a comment on the futility of the Hunter academies. 

I really hate how Salems giving us creepy mommy shades. 

Hmm. So yeah the bridge IS the throne room/command deck. I like how Neo doesnt give a fuck is just casually kneeling. 

Ah okay THATS why he grabbed the scroll. 

Heh. Interesting. How exactly does this work I wonder. 

...Why does Salem have a ring. Has she always had that ring?

Neo looking at the Hound like “oh, I could ride this thing”. 

Oh cool the Ace Ops. And they’re arguing, shocker. Sounds like Elm doesnt trust tech either. No shock there.  Idiot.

Atlas elite. Yeah, right.

Huh, is this a Manta with landing gear? I guess they do have them...seems kind of silly to have them so high up though. I guess thats what the thing under the door is for, so they can deploy a ramp. Man, I really dont like Atlas’s airship design.

Hare needs some fuckin suppresants. 

Annnnddd...here we go, things go straight to hell. I was warned of this. I am going to try and not be mad...but from what Ive heard the incomptence of the military in this particular section is astronomical.

Huh. So...Grimm can be convirted into a rock-punching liquid? Interesting. Has that always been a thing or... Also why the fuck are you jsut standing there in awe, go kill the fucking thing! Fucking Specialists.

...that is all it took to get through Atlas’s shield? THAT?

I also love how no one does anything. Ironwoods like “wait what the fuck”. Come on bro. 

And...thats the Atlas navy. Everyone. Two lasers. One of which missed. Remind me again what exactly these things are used to shoot?

Wait, no, that took down part of it, and then the rest is, surprise, hitting the soft rock on the outside. 

THERE goes the shield. 

Hang on a second, how long have those giant squid things been there?

And...what. The whale just approaches, nothing happens? You’ve got 12 fucking ships there, shoot the fucking thing.

Again, WHY IS NO ONE DOING ANYTHING?

Oh, it just beach-headed. Okay fine, whatever. 

Im not really worried.

Lets see how RT makes this WORSE though...

And thats this weeks episode.

#rwby #rwby v8 #spoilers #rwby spoilers

[stimmypaw]

stimmypaw reads the apprentice’s quest, a blog post

A big one, just a bunch of thoughts as I’m reading it, of course, lots of spoilers for the first book in the Warrior Cats series A Vision of Shadows. This will be covering just the first book tho, it’s all in the Read More, let’s gooooooo!!!!

Vision Of Shadows time

Lots of new cats!!! I don't remember these guys as kits or anything wrow!!! I like their names but itll take a while to get used to them

Also cant believe they printed stormcloud's dead name

Omg there's a cat named beepaw

I love these cats all of them so much im going 2 cry

All new names are perfect

I FORGOT HOW GORGEOUS THE CAT VIEW IN THE RECENT BOOKS WAS, LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT

I'm glad leafpool smokes weed

I love reading from Jayfeather's point of view, his grumpiness hasn't grown on me ever but thats just me, I still enjoy it lots he's great and its fun

Firestar and Leopardstar's characterizations are On Point i love it

OOF i feel so bad when jayfeather is mean to others, poor kestrelflight, I love those two

Lovely Jayfeather moments now its time for the first chapter

I like this duo! Also I didn't think I'd ever say this but shut up squirrelflight one can have fun AND learn with their mentors

Sparkkit sounds nice she makes jingling bell noises when she walks around

Alderkit is chadphobic /j

I can see Alderkit taking deep breaths to relax its rotating in my mind its beautiful

God this first chapter feels so good and comfortable, like eating noodles and chicken nuggets. I am so so deeply in love with it, its gorgeous!

Sparkkit is so perfect too, and Graystripe remembering Firestar aaaaaa

DUSTPELT SAID WHAT? PHDHAHAHHA OH NOOOO I don't remember their relationship much, must have been fun, I love young little creature squirrelflight I MISSED HER SO BAD WOW

I started reading the second chapter and died, I think ill take a break now 2 sleep heehhee

I love them describing twoleg stuff its always so fun and alien, like watching an animal planet show about funny sea creatures.

Also I have determined sparkpaw is my favorite, might be my favorite cat ever next to hollyleaf??? I really identify with her and also she's autistic i have decided that

Alderpaw baby noooo hhhh their mentor at least is trying to show its okay, he seems very emotionally distant so far and alderheart feels very emotionally needy, actually both of them do, did I mention I love Sparkpaw??? I might be imprinting myself 2 much on her

I love how like, its clear both of them are absolutely anxious and worried about others opinions on them, which is clearly something they got from being Firestar's grandkids, deputy kids and leader kids. And bramblestar too, I recall him being quite the anxious lad ahhah. Sparkpaw will be showing confidence and being loud but the second anyone isn't approving of her or she does something "wrong" she gets small and quiet, and she ended up setting a high bar for herself by being good at hunting and fighting so I'm curious to see how that will go. Also there's nothing wrong with being guided through a crowded place to meet others Sparkpaw!!! I bet the two of them would be stuck without not knowing how to talk to others had Needlepaw not shown up. I love them, my gf is mocking me saying I'm a Sparkpaw kinnie.

Apprentices will like learn about a thing and tell everyone about it all the time and assume its always true in every situation and thats valid I love kids like that. Also in my head Needlepaw kinda looks like a porcupine. Oh boo she's fatphobic >:(

I love apprentices they are so fun and silly, just making fun of the leaders like its nothing. The way they are clearly learning and absorving everything their warriors say and do like sponges its just ***chefs kiss***

Omg shadowclan is just full of 12 year olds help

And then the old person said "it sure is hard being old!" And everyone clapped

Shout-out to pretty Riverclan apprentice #481977 I love her

Leafpool: 👁👁

Alderpaw: I knew it im cursed and awful and terrible and I will never amount to anything

I wish the cats didn't seem to be giving up on him so easily though

Ah yes the classic thunderclan move "you suck, into the medicine hole you go"

The way sparkpaw changes the things she says and how she does when it isn't the status quo around her oooooooooooooyeaaaaaaa I love 1 autistic cat

Alderpaw considering your problems lesser than other cats won't help you deal with them better bro

I love Needlepaw's excitement about Alderpaw being a medicine cat apprentice, and her sarcasm, she feels like a preppy teenager

Ahhh this is so good, I am so thirsty for family moments like this, just Alderpaw bonding with grandma, I’ll definitely want to draw this one it’s so sweet.

Oh to be young and silly.

I really am enjoying like, Alderpaw’s struggles to seeing how he fits in the clan, how he fits in himself, how he wants to be seen and what he wants to be, it’s really good. I Am Engaged(tm) With This Plot.

SPARKPAW NOOOOOOO but also Yes I want her to be shown vulnerable and weak please 

POP, god watching this stuff always awful, the cats must have thought he broke her ahahah

Also, really great that they learned from Dovewing and now like leave choices and discussions about prophecies between adults

And plus Brambles seemed to take the time to explain stuff to him, seems he wont be going alone either the 1 thing is that he will be the only one knowing what the journey is really about, why though??? I didnt read Firestar's Quest or whatever why does Skyclan need to be secret??? Seems quite silly really!

YESSSS SANDSTORM GET HIS ASS FIGHT FIGHT LOVE THIS LOVE SANDSTORM

I could feel squirrelflight nearing explosion here, this was very fun, i wish they werent hiding this though!!!

The secret thing is showing to be a plot point so I am once again Very Engaged

Also, wonderful dialogue bit, someone asked Bramblestar why an Elder is going and:

Lovely perfect perfect

I miss you dovewing

SQUIRRELFLIGHT LOVE YOU

Oh boy this is it

Traveling book moment

Graystripe: Soooo you're excited to go on the journey to the old territories and Skyclan?

Sandstorm: Yes! It's been ages and-

Graystripe: I'm sure the tribe will love the visit too

Sandstorm, groaning: Oh noooo I forgot about how the tribe is in the way of every journeyyyyy noooooo they're such a racist caricature, please tell me you have a plan

Graystripe: Yes don't worry about it the writers forgot about the tribe in my comic book so you can just use the excuses i did to actively avoid it

Sandstorm: Oh thank Starclan

Sparkpaw's desperation to prove herself oof, her anxiety with understanding the prophecy, oh boy, and Alderpaw feeling too overwhelmed by the questions and not managing to talk!!!! I am so glad they are both autistic

Hoping "Being Leader" wont mean theyre putting nonsense responsibility on the apprentice again

Ah good Sandstorm is on the lead again, as she should, she should have been leader she would have been great

I can't believe Alderpaw thinks I look stupid and diseased :( /j

Everything about this twoleg scene was scandalous I loved it, Sparkpaw just toppled over a trash bag and they are eating from it, iconic, also did those twolegs throw out a whole turkey? Damn

Its not that Sparkpaw is freakishly good at hunting she is very hungry and constantly on the watch for things to eat

BRO Ive never been in a road where the drivers are this wild, throwing bottles out of the car????? Ive seen Fruit being thrown like once or twice, what the fuck!!! I'm glad they are going to wait until the morning to continue

Okay I was not expecting Needlepaw to show up this girl is chaotic I love her

ACTUALLY YEAH WHY DIDNT THEY TELL THE OTHER CLANS ABOUT THIS SINCE THE PROPHECY IS ABOUT ALL THE CLANS???

Needlepaw is like Rono from Bambi 2 if he wasnt a mean bully and thats very epic

Very curious character though, how come her mentor isnt teaching her the warrior code properly? Is that an issue with all apprentices?? Is the clan overwhelmed by 12 year olds and they won?

Having lots of fun trying to play the game "what animal are they describing this time" the erins made here, im glad they're in a farm. Worried about Sandstorm though :c

Fuck im worried about sandstorm a lot, her wound hurt on Me

Yeah water is good youre right sandstorm

Aw man I hope she's okay let her at least survive to meet skyclan please

NOOOOOOOO SANDSTORMA A AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Sandtteooonrjrbbbmmnnnnnnnnnn

I am so sad

Alderpaw denying it, Starclan shining upon their vigil, everything crushed me i cried

Alderpaw considers Nihilism

Haven't seen a cat thank starclan for prey in a while its

Oh look they time skipped a journey! They don't tend to do that thats nice

I'm so excited to be meeting The Skyclan that everyone in the fandom knows now

So far they seem kinda mean but thats most clans at first glance really

Okay somethings up

I uh have heard of Darktail pretty sure he's a bad guy so yeah something really bad happened to Skyclan

Am worried

Darktail sounds like an evil himbo* i may be enjoying him actually

*himbos are usually nice by default so he's just evil and stupid and strong

Does needletail know these cats already?????

Ah

Shit

Oh okay fuck

I've been quietly reading the rest because I am just concerned and I want them to be okay as quickly as possible

Waterfalls are a classic nice

Oh boy time for our unlikely duo of Alderpaw and Needlepaw to get out of a Mess!

I did not expect this to end up with the two of them journeying into parenthood, but I'm happy it did

Well actually I'm very unhappy theyre so lost and there's no sign of Skyclan I am very worried for everyone involved Sparkpaw must be feeling awful!

Twigkit is a great name

Yeah this ended terribly

Overall! Frigging loved it this book was GOOD and a great start for the series I am very excited to read the rest, SO WORRIED ABOUT SKYCLAN THO AAAA the characterizations were great the characters were great the pacing was fun and I didn't get bored once!

I think o only wish I had read this sooner really so I could look up others thoughts without getting heavily spoiled about the last books, I can watch a few videos already though thats a start ahhaha. But yeah it was great and it felt very good to read, haven't swallowed up a book so quickly in a very long time!!! Very happy I finally got my hands on this 💕💖💕💖💕💖 cant wait 2 start the next one

If you read all this, hope you had fun hahaha, ill be making more of these cus theyre fun and I like talking about warrior cats thats just my thing

Til next time

#wc #the apprentice's quest #warrior cats #a vision of shadows #avos #warrior cats avos #avos wc #wc avos #avos warrior cats #warrior cats a vision of shadows #alderpaw #needlepaw #sparkpaw #violetkit #twigkit

[citialiin]

THE POSITIVE & NEGATIVE; Mun & Muse - Meme.

fill out & repost ♥ This meme definitely favors canons more, but I hope OC’s still can make it somehow work with their own lore, and lil’ fandom of friends & mutuals. Multi-Muses pick the muse you are the most invested in atm. tagged by: @forseenclade thank you ! man i am so bad at doing memes.  tagging: @blossomingbeelzebug @zhrets @lupichorous @dansiere yayayayayayayaya

My muse is:   canon / oc / au / canon-divergent / fandomless / complicated [ z/iggy stardust is DEFINITELY not my original character, but 683 is, and every single part of how i rp ziggy from his backstory to his personality was made up by me. that being said, ziggy is still a character that exists in media. ]

Is your character popular in the fandom?  YES / NO. [ im pretty sure ziggy is tied with the thin white duke as one of b*wie’s most famous fictional personas? ]

Is your character considered hot™ in the fandom?  YES ? / NO / IDK.

Is your character considered strong in the fandom?  YES / NO / IDK.

Are they underrated?  YES / NO / IDK. [ maybe a little overrated ]

Were they relevant for the main story?  YES / NO.

Were they relevant for the main character?  YES / NO / THEY’RE THE PROTAG.

Are they widely known in their world?  YES / NO.

How’s their reputation?  GOOD / BAD / NEUTRAL. [ celebrity rock god of limitless talent vs inevitable overrated washup. most celebrities are polarizing anyways ]

How strictly do you follow canon?  — there isnt much canon to go off of i think? the album barely even states if ziggy is an alien and b*wie himself got really wishy washy about it (sometimes saying z is a human who was contacted by aliens, he was an alien himself, etc). i dont think we know anything about him besides what he looks like (red hair / weird eyes / pale / “well hung” lmao) and he has a band called the spiders from mars, he plays the guitar left handed, he’s bisexual + androgynous, and he’s charming and popular with the teens but inevitably is a victim of his own ego. and he dies.  that too.  but that’s literally it! we know Nothing else about him.  so i filled in all the gaps because my brain has worms.  theres a little bit of the story that verges on fantasy (that he’s some sort of messiah messenger for “the infinites,” whatever the fuck THAT means, david) so i nix that because i prefer hard scifi.  and theres one BIG part that i just ... deleted out of his canon, in that the world is ending in 5 years in his timeline, and he’s like ... aware of this ?  but that’s dumb and confusing.  i legit dont care anymore. my OC now.

SELL YOUR MUSE! Aka try to list everything, which makes your muse interesting in your opinion to make them spicy for your mutuals.  —  im so embarrassed i know i could be genuine and actually try but i have brain blockajjolajlakala33lak33klak333ak3jka3akjj323j3 i guess it’s like ... ziggy is truly the ultimate expression OF humanity because he reveals everything both wrong and right about the human condition, he literally embodies the best of humanity and the worst at the same time, he’s a really interesting critique on the idea of genuineness/earnestness vs commercalism in art, the perils of fame, and also how humans are so inherently corrupting?  a lot of thematic stuff i like exploring is like what is innate to humans vs what is learned behavior, what are things that humans do naturally that ziggy mimics out of his desire to be like us?  i think he has a really good story arc -- he went from being a literal nameless CLONE in a society full of pragmatic forward thinking science-oriented people to a sell out rockstar celebrity in a society of people that value individualism and self expression and art, but in the process completely lost his mind and himself and gave into the worst that humanity has to offer like rampant selfishness, drug abuse, self destructive tendencies, etc. characters changing is always interesting and ziggy truly changes for the worse -- but he is never just black and white, he was never good and then suddenly evil, he just was always the same person putting on different facades and trying to be himself by constructing an identity that maybe was who he wanted to be versus who he actually is.  i dont know what im talking about. hes just an alien trying to be too hard to be human in all the wrong ways.   i just like how “gray” ziggy is. he isnt good or bad, he can be very nice and he can be very mean, he’s overtly showboating confident but at the same time deeply afflicted with self-consciousness (why tf else would anyone be So obsessed with how they present themselves?).  hes an icon of individualism but also commercialism.  he’s freakishly alien but is almost more human than humans themselves.  he struggles as lot in his head -- which makes for interesting writing, i guess !!  Im so emabrrased im not going to go back and read what i wrote so if i typoed dont look at me

Now the OPPOSITE, list everything why your muse could not be so interesting (even if you may not agree, what does the fandom perhaps think?).  —  i think ziggy comes across as really mean and nothing else.  his horrible bitchy rudeness comes across as hee hee hoo hoo sassy isnt he a rascal when it’s supposed to be more like ... he’s so far gone into the celebrity delusion he’s conflated aggressive rudeness with charmingness because no one told him otherwise and everyone worships him to the point where he’s just given into the delusion that he can do no wrong.  i think theres the general simplification problem that happens with a lot of fictional characters, it’s easy to see him as just a whacky sassy glittery quirky rockstar when i guess it avoids the inherent tragedy of like ... everything else about him. his totally fake and false sense of identity built up from superficial things like fame and labels and stardom.  maybe my version of ziggy is just too weirdly depressing and sad when i know his original iteration wasn’t quite so ... grim.  im not very sure tbh.  

What inspired you to rp your muse?  —  hmmm ... a lot of things! i just really got into b*wie stuff in early 2019, i’ve ALWAYS loved aliens and sci-fi, and i was really shocked that db sets up such great visual storytelling potential but does it through music.  i just really liked ziggys “story” and i like any chance to think about aliens so i just got invested into piecing together a little backstory for him using, like, the cumulative knowledge of literally every other piece of science fiction ive ever consumed in my life.  this was summer 2019 when i was making initial pitches for my thesis film, and so i just randomly decided to pitch “animated version of ziggy stardust” as one of the potential ideas.  shockingly everyone liked it a lot and so did my professor who thought it was really cool, and then i just ended up sticking with the character and working on him for an entire year.  ziggy became my hobby but also my homework.  he was such a fun character because everything about him was interesting to me and i had just enough source material to have a starting point but so much room to take him in any direction i wanted to.

What keeps your inspiration going?  —  honestly, yooooou guyssssss. i have some really amazing fwends that ive met thru here .... and some of our dumb stupid stories have literally become NOVEL length. it just self generates inspiration because you realize the limitless amount of stories you could tell with this one single character when your character enters his story or he enters their story and etc. etc.  ive drawn endless amounts of comics and stuff for him ... ziggy is just so endlessly interesting ...   cringe be cringed bro but recently (i know this sounds dumb bear with me or die.) ive kind of realized a lot of how i rp z comes as some metaphor for the experience of being an asian immigrant/being asian in the US -- his home “culture” is a lot stricter than the rampant selfish individualism of the usa (he only lives in the uk and usa, so he thinks the whole planet is like this), he’s dissuaded from standing out from his community and his selfishness becomes a community burden rather than a personal flaw, and when he does come to earth, he goes through such awful culture shock, literally nothing makes sense to him and everything is Different.  and while some things are different in a Nice way, something things are different in an Awful way, and he’s given the option between losing his true personal identity as an atominan and giving it up to be a human.  the allure of being a human is a little too much but losing yourself like this is traumatic, in a way.  obvs like ... a little silly and definitely not something that i actively intended to put into his story arc, its just something that fell into place cuz i guess i worked so closely with my own personal experiences and feelings of “alienation” (pun intended) to try to understand how he would feel being a literal alien an shid. its cathartic to write about him. but he also has a lot of my own personal interests just thrown in -- 70s fashion, scifi, science, tryhard implications about human nature, art history, whatever dumb nonsense i get into

Some more personal questions for the mun.

Give your mutuals some insight about the way you are in some matters, which could lead them to get more comfortable with you or perhaps not.

Do you think you give your character justice?  YES / NO / SOMETIMES?

Do you frequently write headcanons?  YES / NO  [ i would prefer information to spring up organically in the story but cuz threads always get dropped i end up just telling people outright. i didnt want anyone to know his home planet/his old name but barely anyone writes enough with ziggy to get to that point to reveal it (i legit managed to do it organically Once) so i just had to write it in a post lmao orz ]

Do you sometimes write drabbles?  YES / NO [ wrote a ton of drabbles ! drew a ton of comics! ]

Do you think a lot about your Muse during the day? YES / NO 

Are you confident in your portrayal?   YES / NO / I DUNNO?

Are you confident in your writing?  YES / HAHA NO.

Are you a sensitive person?  YES  / NO. / IDK ? 

Do you accept criticism well about your portrayal?  —  definitely!  like i said ... my version of ziggy ended up being the protag of my thesis film and for 1 yr straight his characterization, backstory, design, and even how i wanted to animate his fucking movements (ziggy stardust timing charts.) were beaten to death in a classroom environment, torn apart and rebuilt into something better.  had i stayed with what i originally wanted to go with, ziggy would be so different than how i write him 2day. amazingly my pre production professor is a literal two time emmy award winning storyboard artist and animator so he definitely helped me design him (my version of ziggy is meant for ... a cartoon, obviously, not real life) and give him a better backstory?  and my post production professor is a retired disney animator who worked on hercules and a bunch of old disney channel shows?  had i gone wah wah wah i dont want to hear ur critiques i wouldnt have made him better.  if you ever think ziggy seems inconsistent or poorly written ... tell me !! i literally major in ... animation. cartoons. entertainment.  my job is to entertain you. if you are not entertained, there is a problem.  ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED ????

Do you like questions, which help you explore your character?  —  I LOVE QUESTIONS? i love ... answering questions ... if you ask me something ill come kiss you.

If someone disagrees to a headcanon of yours, do you want to know why?  —  sure! i dont know why that would happen, though, because i mean ... he’s an OC. but i gues someone could be like “i feel like this is incongruous to things you’ve previously established in his character” or somethin

If someone disagrees with your portrayal, how would you take it?  —  i feel like a lot of b*wie stans would find my version of ziggy weird but i mean thats fine!  i guess my goal is to have a well written character, not necessarily an accurate version of ziggy

If someone really hates your character, how do you take it?  —  if you hate MY version of ziggy thats fine but if u hate ziggy stardust in general (like the bowie concept) then u need some taste what the fuck is cooler than a egomaniac genderless bisexual rockstar alien with red hair? nothing. go back to watching your CW shows you dirty filthy normie

Are you okay with people pointing out your grammatical errors?  —  yes! dm me though. dont clown me on the dash like that.  i usually write your replies 12 AM - 4 AM so it’s expected.

Do you think you are easy going as a mun?   —  hmmm ... maybe! i do like to talk to people and i am VERY nice, trust me, if youre ever sad ill do everything i can to make you feel better. but im quiet! i dont really reach out to people and i tend to just keep to myself.  im not very social or extroverted at all haha i barely can make ooc posts without feeling like god’s coming to beat my head in with a brick. im sitting here at 5:30 AM with this meme feeling like if i post it i will die (BUT I MUST)

#a lot of it is under the readmore because these always get so long and mine is long long long long long long long long long long long #ooc #KEEP YOUR 'LECTRIC EYE ON ME ; queue #and thakn you for tagging me ! i like to mkae Words

[only-in-dreamland]

'Cuante cazzate' or otherwise known as how to get your heart stomped all over in 13 minutes or less

Alrighty y'all a quick preface. This will probably be my last season 2 analysis, since season 3 begins tomorrow, and I want to allow myself to go with the flow of this current season. Marti's season will forever hold a special place in my heart and I'll never have enough words to say about it, but for now...

The first shot of the clip, of Marti and he just looks instantly withdrawn. He's there with the boys but he's not really there you know.

'You ate martino's supplì and nuggets, his breaded olives...' - Marti not having much of an appetite clearly indicates his mental state at the moment. Yh I'm in pain.

The boys banter. I just love seeing it because we're actually seeing the boys be friends; hanging out, doing silly mundane things that whilst might not seem significant, are actually so important because we get to see the cohesion as a unit. The familiarity. The affinity. The camaraderie. It's all so substantial.

And Marti still isn't moved, his face is expressionless.

Oh gio. The way he glances at martino and ever so subtly takes him in because he can see something isn't right. He just knows, and he doesn't need to make a point of it to notice. He's so aware of his best friend that he takes note of it, perhaps for a later time.

There's a moment where gio and marti hold eye contact for a split second, and ugh it's details like this that I live for. It just highlights their friendship again and again.

Three times. Three times gio looks over at marti. Gio watches marti this time, he can see how fed up he looks and it bothers gio. He's concerned but he can't quite put his finger on it.

'Argentina, argentina!!' The way they start chanting this, trying to get though to Marti and you know what I love...is that it works. For a moment or two anyway. Because it just reinforces their authenticity as friends. To have to ability to uplift someone when they're down.

The whole montage is just gold. There's a bit where Luchino is stood in front of Marti, actively trying to cheer him up in his own silly way. They all recognise marti's mood and it just shows how attentive they are.

I've said it before and I'll say it again, the physicality between all of them is so instrumental in showcasing their comfort and awareness of each other.

They are all so amused by one another, it's just pure joy watching their dynamic unfold.

Then they put their attention onto Marti,

'Now smile. Big smile!' - they want to see him happy and there's a moment where they literally lift up his smile; lifting him up if you will.

The bike ride; it almost feels symbolic that Marti was lagging behind on his own, whilst the other three were in front... Perhaps as a way to represent his isolation? Distance from the group because he hasn't shared what's bothering him? That he's alone in this secret that burdens him?

Moving on to Marti inside the club, when he spots nico on the couch it looks as if he's gearing himself up to almost confront him? The way he takes a big gulp, and puts his hands on hips...to build confidence?? He watches for a few seconds and then he nods as if confirming to himself 'i'm doing this' and then in comes Emma.

The way he's fumbling for excuses, trying to think on the spot because all his focus was on Niccolò just seconds before.

'How many fucking times can you lie? Do you realise it's 2018 and nobody fucking cares if you're gay or not?'

After what she says you can see it, all over his face, his eyes...his confidence has been completely destroyed.

The timing of when the beat drops is just brilliant; in sync with Marti. He takes a minute to collect himself and then it's as if he's shaken out of it when he realises where he is again. Remembers what he was there for and looks towards Niccolò.

You can see as Marti watches them, he just progressively loses his patience. He just looks done...with all of it. He's just found out that his secret is not so secret. It's the last thing he expected to come out of Emma's mouth and it threw him. He's off balance and seeing nico kiss maddelena was the final blow to knock him to the ground, so to speak. So he walks away

As he's walking away outside, he just looks defeated. Retreating away from Niccolò as he retreats away into his mind.

'Bro, what the fuck is up with you? Why are you being such a dick?' Gio doesn't even ask this with any aggression, just more concern and a willingness, an eagerness, to know, to understand.

'You wanna get in?' FUCK you can hear his voice is thick with emotion. He's starting to crack and Fede plays it in the most drawn out way that I'm in awe.

'All the girls you drool over and in there hooking up with seniors...So if you wanna go in there and make fools of yourselves wearing these stupid ass blazers, he's even wearing a fucking tie on his head, go ahead. Go! C'mon!'- the saddest part is that he may be calling them fools, but really he's calling himself that. He's projecting onto them because he feels played. He's the one who just went in there, looking for nico and he's come out feeling so betrayed that he just can't contain his emotion anymore.

'Go fight with your mommy. Or this time it might be your dad.' God this hit deep with Marti, and we have concrete evidence as to why. We've seen his tricky relationship with his mum, as well as relationship, rather lack thereof, with his dad. We don't just know it. We've seen it.

When Marti knocks gio to the ground, god the sound goes through me. It just feels so...loud. Also, i always felt like one of the reasons Marti walks away is because he felt ashamed of hurting gio like that. No matter the inner turmoil he was going through, you know it was never his intention for it to affect his friends. Not once.

Which just makes the fight between the boys that much more heartbreaking. You can feel the struggle, the charge between them all. The deeper the friendship goes, the more space there is for impact. And that's what you feel with this scene. It's personal. It's painful. And it's monumental.

Okay for real this is the part that no matter how many times I've goddam watched it, I will forever be broken because of it. Martino breaking down in frustation, in anguish, just...completely shattered. Screaming 'fuck off!' because he just can't take it anymore. Taking it out on the world because it's the only way he can. Fede's voice oh my god it physically causes me pain, his ability to emote through his voice alone, gives me goosebumps. Those deep, resounding breaths and the way his chest is heaving so intensely...it actually takes my breath away.

And lastly can I just point out...the sound of the train picking up, as Marti reaches breaking point; it all building to an unmistakeable climax- poetic cinema!!

#skam italia #this got very very long #it's been a while since i word vomited

[sweet-little-bird-fanfic]

YOUNG K - Pure Desire

Masterlist & Chapters: Check my bio for the masterlist link. Idk why but posts with links don’t show up on the tumblr’s search feature anymore. So, I’ll leave the link to my master list there, where you can find the other chapters easily. I hope this is still functional for you guys, sorry for the trouble. I hope you can still enjoy my work despite the technical issues.

Summary: A young writer that’s struggling with her work until she crosses paths with an intense and fated new type of inspiration; An inspiration called: YOUNG K!

Genre: Fanfic; Romance; Smut (っ˘ڡ˘ς)

Warnings: Swearing?

CHAPTER 3- Kitchen Heat

YOUNG K

It was a long day of work, but it passed really fast since we had a lot to do in the studio. To be honest, I spent half of the time laughing alone because of the hug situation and the other half... I was just trying to forget the feeling of that silly girl's wet skin against my body.

Everyone was making it even harder for me, the members kept talking about her and how nice, energetic and clumsy she seemed. It was almost impossible not to think about her when everyone but her brother kept bringing her up, which made me a bit irritated and I accidentally ended up mocking her every single time. And at those moments, I could feel Kim Jii (big bro) staring at me amused as if he was agreeing with my mocking words without even defending his sister. At least that's what I thought until at some point he patted my shoulder and said imitating an old man's voice:

- Oh boy, you're in trouble Young K.

We arrived at our temporary house and the first thing I saw was a black cat cuddling up to a troublesome girl sleeping on the sofa. Everyone else went to the kitchen since it was late and we were all starving, but I stayed behind looking at Violet as she rested her head peacefully on her hands. "She's cute when she's asleep." I looked around and grabbed a red blanket to cover her, once I did, the cat came from under it and run off somewhere.

It didn't take long until Violet came to the kitchen and greeted us with a sleepy smile. Everyone talked with her and I sat next to her as she explained some preparations she had made during the day and I couldn't help but tease her when she brought up the bathroom on the second floor. Even though all the members attacked me and protected the naive girl, I felt extremely pleased with the fact that I could provoke her so easily.

I guess she was feeling too uncomfortable with my behaviour that she wanted to disappear from the kitchen as soon as possible. After she said her polite goodbyes, Violet bumped into my shoulder accidentally as she got up from her seat. And without realising my hand fled to her back protected by the blanket that was involving her, drove by the urge to make sure she was okay and the unsuspected need to touch her. I bowed in response when I noticed her concerned look and then saw her disappear on the stairs.

They all finished snacking as I reflected on my weird actions. We went to our room and Kim Jii (big bro) made sure everyone didn't need anything and left us to sleep. I looked around the room and it was very organised and different from before: one side was the sleeping area and the other was the free time area, filled with games and some other cool stuff. Violet had probably spent the whole day preparing everything to make sure we felt at home. This thought made my heart warm and I started to feel guilty about teasing her so much. "But she's so damn cute when she gets all flushed and panics." As I lay down, I noticed every bed had towels from different sizes well folded and tidy.

- Does she think this is a hotel? What's up with the room service?! - I thought out loud.

- Brian, what is your problem!? - Jae said looking at me with a disgusted expression.

- Are you a bully, Young K? - Sungjin asked throwing a pillow at me and for some reason, I felt really stupid and my guilt increased.

I ignored all of them and hugged some pillows. It didn't take long until everyone fell asleep, Jae was drooling on his pillow, Sungjin was hidden under his blankets, as for Dowoon and Dopil, they had fallen asleep hugging each other on the sofa. And even though the atmosphere was so pacific and quiet, I couldn't sleep. I rolled over and over in bed until my hair became close to look like a bird's nest. And all of this is because I couldn't stop thinking about her.

I couldn't stop thinking about how I ingeniously followed the sound of her voice when she called out from the bathroom and our bodies collided, my hands rushed to hold her and my heart seemed to want to jump out of my chest. I couldn't stop thinking about her delicious fresh flowered smell, the water drops on her neck side, her startled look, her flustered words, how it made me feel and how my brain stopped working as I stopped the towel from falling. If I was to be completely honest, I would have to say I wanted that towel to fall at her feet and reveal her naked body. But at that moment, I was divided between what I was supposed to do and what my body was telling me to do. And I definitely couldn't forget the way I behaved, absorbed in the strong attraction our bodies were sharing and blinded by the need to fight against myself, I ended up losing my self-control and teased her once again like an idiot! But I couldn't help it, her innocence toyed with my boundaries and pricked my discipline.

But what really wasn't letting me sleep was the sensation she left me with when she trembled against my tough body, the electricity that pulsed through my body and the adrenaline that rushed through my veins fed a new famished sexual lust in me.

I started to feel a tactile frenetic feeling at the end of my loins just from the thought of it.

Trying to avoid getting aroused in a room filled with boys and knowing I wouldn't fall asleep soon, I forcedly distracted myself getting up and tried to get the cuddling boys on the sofa to go to their beds:

- Hey, it's 2 am. Go to your beds, your backs will hurt tomorrow. - I said shaking their arms gently, but they didn't even open their eyes and cuddled up even tighter in response.

I laughed looking at them and stole a blanket from one of the beds to cover my friends.

- Aigo, you cutie buns... - I said whilst scratching my head and walking out of the room.

As I closed the door behind me, I sighed and stopped to stare at the bathroom door. I couldn't help but remember the incident from this morning again (not that I forgot about it anyway) and felt my body reacting towards that memory: her wet skin slipping through my fingers as I tried to grab and push her against me; her unsteady breathing tickling my chin; her adorable hesitant expression and her sparkling eyes.

Everything was driving me nuts. I barely knew her and none of this made sense... I should be sleeping and resting but contradictory to that, it was 2 AM and I was drowning in thoughts of her and I had to force myself to not even look at her bedroom door. "You're not a teenager, Young K! For fuck's sake!"

I rushed downstairs to the kitchen to find something to drink since all those wild thoughts were making me thirsty. When I walked in, I saw Violet holding a cup of tea between her delicate hands. Our eyes met nervously and I could see by her expression that she was uncomfortably anxious with my presence too, but the flame in her eyes told a different story and I made all the efforts to avoid her gaze. Otherwise, I wasn't sure what I would do!

- Can't sleep? - I asked to break the silence.

- I was working. You? - Violet spoke too fast which made it obvious that she was lying.

- I can't sleep. - I said running my eyes through her body and locked them with hers.

She was wearing a simple thin pyjamas with shorts and that innocent outfit made me wonder if I was a pervert, considering it was making me more aroused. The fact that she wasn't wearing a bra was obvious seeing that her hard nipples were striking against the thin fabric that covered her skin, helping my excitement to increase more and more. From where I was standing, even though they weren't that big, her boobs seemed naturally beautiful and their curvy smooth form shaped the fabric of her shirt. Without realising, I probably stared for too long and made her cross her arms over her breasts.

- So... - she said weirdly loud - Want some tea?! It always puts me to sleep.

- Please... - I said disappointedly as I looked at her crossed arms.

I saw her moving carefully as she prepared my tea and I couldn't stop myself from staring at her curvy body. I was being intoxicated by the defiled thoughts that left my brain and hurried down to my lower part, making my blood pressure rise and my bulge become even more voluminous.

I felt my mind drifting away alongside with my self-control when she asked me for some sugar and I unconsciously cornered her against the kitchen table, drunk in lust. As she turned around suddenly facing me, her fragrance was even stronger than I remembered from before. And when I finally came to my senses, I had already lost to her pure but intense desire. She could try to pretend she didn't want me, but I could feel her unsteady breaths against my lips and I just knew: she wanted me too. It was too late to go back, not because I couldn't simply say sorry and make an excuse, but because I couldn't let her go. Call it sex pheromones or whatever, but I just wanted to get lost in her. So, I took the mug she bravely put between us, placing it on the table and came closer, making the distance between our bodies disappear. I felt her tremble and she placed her hand on my chest, I smirked and kissed it as she sat on the kitchen table. "Good girl."

- Were you thinking about me? - I said as I looked at her lips insatiably - Was that why you couldn't sleep, Violet?

I saw her struggling to maintain her composure and noticed she was shaken away when I pronounced her name, which made me unintentionally groan. She did answer me but I didn't even bother to understand what she said, knowing it was a lie by the tone of her voice so she could run away from this situation.

- You're a really bad liar, Violet. - I said against her ear as I possessively felt her soft skin covered by her pyjamas' shorts and spread her legs, standing between them trying to pull her against my body as I bit her earlobe and felt her shiver. The feeling of my bare hands rubbing against her smooth skin made me feel euphoric and lose all the rationality I had left.

She berried her face on my shoulders and tried to cover her legs, I guess I made a mess out of her shorts when I explored her legs since they were all rolled up now. I grabbed her waist and run my hand through her back, making her thoughtlessly wrap her legs around me. "What a good girl", I thought as my cramped member pressured against her stomach.

She said something but I wasn't really listening because of the feeling of her warm feminine body against my excited manhood. Even though my brain was a chaos I managed to bring out some words filled with bad intentions:

- Earlier... - I placed my right hand on her sweaty neck looking for approval - You said you weren't good at games. Shall I teach you?

I leaned towards her face, even though she closed her eyes she still shrugged trying to run away. I smiled at her cute reaction and bit my lower lip, thirsty for hers. I was desperate to kiss her and it was when our breaths were mixing together and our lips were millimetres away from touching, that a weird fluffy sensation rubbed against my left hand that was resting on the table. And all of the sudden a thin sharp pain attacked and evolved it. When I looked down, I saw the black cat biting me.

- What the ... - I said staring at the cat confused, but that's when I noticed I could feel Violet's accelerated heartbeats on her neck against my fingers which excited me even more.

When I looked back at her, she let go of a disappointing sight and managed to get away from me. As she got down the table, her body rubbed against mine and even though that was an accident, my body shivered with the sudden rushed impact of our bodies colliding. I was able to grab her hand and pushed her against the fridge.

- Wait! - I said as I grabbed her hair behind her neck firmly - Don't go...

- If ... if - she said shaking and lost in words - If you don't let go of me right now, I'll bite you too!

I knew those words were a mere pure attend of threat, but they surprised me and made me feel guilty, as a sinful desire came over me when she pronounced them. The image of her biting my skin made me feel hot but since I recognised she was just being naive, I couldn't help but laugh.

- Go ahead! Bite me - I said looking deep into her eyes - I'll let you do it.

- What ?! - She said pushing her hand against my chest trying to create some distance between us - Do you have a biting fetish or something? Let me go. Now!

- I think you like it too. - I said and bit her earlobe again, the salty taste of her skin made me go crazy and woke my wildest senses.

She moaned quietly into my ear and when I looked at her amazed at the sweet sound, I saw her face being invaded with a red shade that made her look extremely vulnerable. I stared at her lips and she quickly covered them with her hands, knowing I was going to kiss her. That reaction made me want to tease her even more. So, I slowly kissed the elegant hands that were covering her tempting lips, as I got lost in the agitated emotions shown in her eyes.

I could feel her squeezing her legs tightly together and the thought that maybe she was feeling my presence somewhere else and deeper than I could reach at that moment made me lose it: I roughly took her hands from her mouth and held them above her head against the fridge as I leaned my lips towards hers. I could feel her twisting and on the last second, before our lips could connect, she moved her face and made me end up kissing her cheek instead.

- Would you mind to stay still!? - I ordered as I placed my knee between her legs and saw her struggling to control her breath.

Her breasts rubbed against my chest each time Violet inhaled and she desperately tried to avoid the pressure I was making between her legs with my knee. I slowly took one of my hands to caress the side of her body and placed it on her ass, my hand slid and lifted her right leg.

- Stop! - she gasped placing her forehead against my shoulder.

I laughed and let go of her hands to grab her other leg and lifted her up. She put her arms around my neck and let a gasp escape her nervous mouth when I made her jump in the air and grabbed her ass. Violet struggled to try to make me let go of her and made her body rub against the tip of my hard member.

- Hmmm, Violet. If I were you, I wouldn't move much. - I said kissing her neck and letting my desire take over me.

She bit my shoulder trying to hide her moans when I licked her neck. I felt my body give away with the erotic pain she inflicted on me. So, I pulled for a chair to sit and placed her on my lap, grabbing her hips and letting her rub her tense body against my excited groin with only our mere clothes separating us.

- I wanna hear more of that sweet voice of yours. - I said whispering as she played with my hair and hid her face on my neck. - Don't hide...

I grabbed her chin and made her face me. As I brushed her hair and placed it behind her ear, she placed her shaking hands against my abdomen and made butterflies invade my stomach. I excused all of those energetic sensations she triggered in me with the fact that it had been a while since I had been with someone.

- I'm going to kiss you. - I said staring at her expectant eyes.

The moment our lips touched and I kissed her softly, it made my back shiver as she dug her nails into my neck. We both stopped and stared at each other's lips, and leaned in sync once again to bury our thirsty lips together. As I bit her lower lip she slightly opened her mouth and let me explore it with my thrilling tongue, she moaned into my mouth as our tongues played with each other and hugged me tightly, pressing her body against mine. I grabbed her ass thither and made her bounce on my lap, groaning between our frenetic kiss and making her face lean to the other side. Every move we made seemed well matched and our mouths completed each other as only the most passionate lovers would. As our kiss deepened, our bodies started to look for more and more, becoming sincere with each move we took. As we searched for an easier way to move and to involve our bodies deeper, we stood up together and bumped against the table, waking up from our inflamed kiss when we could barely breathe.

We looked at each other knowing that our kiss wasn't just built on physical attraction and step back awkwardly as we tried to catch our breath, knowing we willingly crossed a dangerous line.

This was too dangerous, I wanted more. That wasn't enough and I tried to read the look on her face, hoping she wanted more too. Her watered shiny eyes demanded more but her body was in defence as she protected it holding one of her arms with her hand. Violet was clearly facing a battle with her self-control and as for me... I was trying to respect her space by avoiding something I was craving so deeply.

- I... That felt ... - I said as she stared at my lips.

- ...good. - she completed my phrase letting an invisible "but" in the air, seeming a bit scared and anxious.

- Sorry, I went a bit overboard... - I said running my hands through my hair.

I touched her hand with my fingers and then created some distance between us. Then, I slowly sat in the furthest chair from her and saw her lost in thoughts. I let my head fall on the kitchen table and then lifted it to support it on one of my hands.

- Goodnight, Violet. - I said as I covered my victorious childish smile behind my free hand.

- Goodnight... - She said timidly as she walked towards the kitchen door and stopped to look back at me.

- You better go before I chase after you. - I pronounced before burying my face in my arms and saw her leave - What have I done?!

I hid my stupid smiley face in my hands and stood up to stretch my arms in the air. That moment didn't last long and it was interrupted right away when the growth in my pants remembered to punish me and agonize me.

- Nice! - I said bending down and holding my knees assimilating what just happened between the two of us, wishing she could come back to take care of what she had done to me.

I stood up and walked upstairs slowly, really slowly. The boner I had wasn't letting me move easily and my mind was calming down to make it less hard on myself. Miraculously, I was able to reach the bathroom and locked myself in it. I turned on the cold water in the bathtub and got under it. How could I have gotten so hard just from looking at her and touching a little?

The water running down my body didn't relax me at all, everything felt extremely good and the fact that she was just in the next room as I stared down at my stiff state made me feel even more aroused.

- Oh fuck. - I said as I gave up my self-control, grabbed my hard Young K junior and started to relieve myself.

Masterlist & Chapters:

Check my bio for the masterlist link. Idk why but posts with links don’t show up on the tumblr’s search feature anymore. So, I’ll leave the link to my master list there, where you can find the other chapters easily. I hope this is still functional for you guys, sorry for the trouble. I hope you can still enjoy my work despite the technical issues.

A/N: I wish you all hot kitchen scenes in your life!

Love Hot kitchen scenes from Sweet Little Bird. 

#day6 #day6 fanfic #day6 young k #young k smut #young k hot #day6 jae #jae #day6 dowoon #dowoon #kpop fanfiction #kpop fanfic #kpop smut #day6 wonpil #wonpil #day6 sungjin #sungjin #romance #day6 brian #brian

[redvelvetreel]

Red Velvet Reel 6.2: Cele-BRAT-ion!

                     [Fic Directory]

Pairing: [Married] Spicyhoney (Underfell Papyrus x Underswap Papyrus)

Summary: As they struggle to get through this stupid bet, Stretch realizes he had way too high expectations for the evening and Fell monsters are stress. He knew that, and yet...

Characters: Edge (Underfell Papyrus) & Stretch (Underswap Papyrus) & Red (Underfell Sans) & Blue (Underswap Sans) & Classic (Undertale Papyrus) & Comic (Undertale Sans) & Slim/Puppy (Swapfell Papyrus) & Black (Swapfell Sans) & some poor random waitress lol.

Contains: Mpreg/Skelepreg! Meeting up in a (sports) bar! Everyone talks a lot and never shuts up! (More) Stupid Fellverse posturing and antagonism! Lots of headcanons! 

Rating: Teen and up! (I guess?)

Note:  Hah, a labor of love that I’m still not satisfied with but! Enjoy!

Underswap Papyrus – Stretch            Underswap Sans –  Blue Underfell Paprus – Edge                     Underfell Sans – Red Swapfell Papyrus – Slim/Puppy         Swapfell Sans – Black Undertale Papyrus – Classic              Undertale Sans – Comic

“Typical,” Black let out an annoyed puff of breath, “Your kind are too curious.”

“My kind?” Edge propped his head up on his hand, smirking smugly even as he feigned innocence, “I would have never taken you for a coward, but appearances can be deceiving, I suppose. Would you like to look at the drink menu?”

“You!” Black curled his fingers into such a tight fist his knuckles cracked, scowl positively withering. “If you think I’ll be goaded by something so insufferably baiting and juvenile-“

“Put up,” Red popped his p’s for extra emphasis, leveling Black with a flat look, “Or shut up. Ain’t no one got time for yer bullshit- ain’t no one care.”

Black swore under his breath, banging the table once in frustration before turning to his brother, “Pochi!”

“Poochie?” Comic and Stretch looked at each other, unsure if they had heard correctly.

Slim looked up as though startled by being addressed, shoulders tense and sockets blown wide. Feeling so many eyes on him, he hunched in on himself, nervously picking at the myriad of bracelets on his wrists.

“Tell these overly curious buffoons which one you bet on,” Black sounded incredibly bored, waving his hand in the air dismissively, “And make up some inane reason why- you’ve already sunk enough money into this pointless game. Ah, wait- this crepe.”

That skirted a dangerous line. With a fearsome scowl, Edge slammed his hands onto the table as he pushed himself to his feet, looking very much like he was about to punch Black out. Unthinkingly, Classic grabbed his hands, squeezing them with a nervous smile as he gestured to the Slim with his chin, “Er, Slimjim! Once more, big voice, please!”

Blue sat up from his slump, looking confused, “Slimjim? The jerky?” He asked quietly, but Classic didn’t seem to hear him.

Obviously uncomfortable with so much attention on him, Slim looked down at the table with a shrug. When Black started drumming his fingers impatiently, however, he let out a shaky sigh and pointed at Stretch.

“Cuz...” He whispered to himself, snapping his bracelets against his bones with furrowed browbones. Slim started running his pointer finger along every bead on his first bracelet, flicking it up with his claw to catch on his palm before repeating the process, “...Ya know...”

Kinda weirded out but mostly sympathetic to how unhappy the hunched up skeleton looked, Stretch turned towards Comic conspiratorially.

“What obvious reason?” He whispered loudly, “Does this hoodie make me look fat?”

“Nope,” Comic winked as he whispered back, “I can’t Fathom why he’d say that.”

Slim smiled immediately, cheekbones dimpling as he scrunched his face up in a repressed laugh, “Nyeh.”

“Cute.”

Black choked on something, turning to cough into his elbow even as he waved off Comic’s offer to pat his back. He finished the rest of his drink in a big gulp, eyes still closed and coughing lightly, although it seemed oddly forced.

“That’s is extremely weird!” Classic spoke up loudly and cheerfully, puffing out his chest as he pointed at himself, “Therefore I, the Great Ambassador Papyrus, will return normalcy by explaining my bet! And reasoning!”

He dropped his voice to a loud whisper, “With the disclaimer that betting is a form of gambling, and gambling can be a very serious issue! Moderation is key, and if you or any of your loved ones are struggling with it, there are resources available!” He winked audibly, looking at Black earnestly, “I can be discreet! Just let me know how I can help.”

Whereas Black looked confused and annoyed, Slim seemed absolutely delighted, clapping a hand over his mouth to stifle a giggle.

“Sasuga, Papz,” he told Classic warmly, going back to playing with his bracelets as his bright smile dropped into something more neutral.

“I don’t know what that means, but thank you Slimjim, I think!” Classic answered just as brightly, before tapping his chin thoughtfully, “Where was I?”

“Talkin’ about dear Aunt Sal ‘n the chickens that roost in the ol’ barn,” Comic supplied helpfully, grin growing wider as his brother turned to him in complete outrage.

“Don’t be silly, Sans!” Classic tossed his head imperiously, sounding annoyed, “Everyone knows it’s cows that roost in the barn!”

He sighed loudly, “Where was I? Ah, Yes, I actually bet it was... you, Eggo!”

Stretch and Comic practically collapsed on themselves snickering, trying not to burst out laughing. Even Black seemed to be covering his mouth to avoid smiling.

Slim didn’t look up, but reached over to rest a light hand on Classic’s shoulder... who looked embarrassed. Edge’s cool look in their direction sobered them quickly, but his voice was kind as he turned to his counterpart, “I understand. It’s difficult to keep track of so many nicknames.”

Classic smiled, but it didn’t reach his eyes, “I’m sorry, Papyrus- I just seem to forget everyone’s nickname when I’m thinking of your real names. I understand why we do it, and I hope we’re all satisfied with our nicknames- but it is still just so very, very frustrating!”

Expression softening, Comic leaned his elbows on the table, “Aw, Pap-“

“It’s fine! I’m over it!” Classic waved his brother off cheerfully, all smiles and overly excited energy. Stretch wasn’t entirely convinced. “Anyway, it’s because Sketchers is very much like Sans, and Sans- “

Despite their best attempts, most of the skeletons at the table couldn’t help smiling.

“Excuse me, Chexmix is absolutely terrible at taking care of himself! Ergo, Sketchers is too! Ergo, he wouldn’t have the discipline! To resist so many bad habits and temptations! It would be terribly difficult for him-“

Classic jerked towards Stretch suddenly, “Not that I don’t think you are not capable of doing these things! Oh no, I think you could absolutely do these things! If so motivated! Which you probably would be in that situation! In which case, if my guess is incorrect, I very much believe in you! Because I know you will be the best parent you can be!”

Stretch laughed in good humor, grabbing Comic’s glass in a toast, “Guilty as charged! No offense taken, bud.”

Classic beamed, turning back to Edge enthusiastically, “So it can’t be Sketchers! Well, probably not. And, well, you are kind of a control freak, Egg- eh, Edge! It would be better for your peace of mind to be in charge! And you are also very disciplined! And that is why it can only be you! Likely!”

Before Edge could say anything, he turned to Blue on his right. “Bluebell?”

“Oh, I already know the answer-“ Blue toyed with the straw in his glass, jolting when Classic gasped loudly.

“What?!” He was indignant, “And you didn’t even give us a hint?! How could you?! So this is pointless?! You even put a bet in!”

“I literally just said so!” Blue was drawing himself up on his knees in an instant, defiantly glaring only inches away from Classic’s face, “I didn’t put a bet in!”

“Blue,” Stretch called out wearily, making a ‘sit down’ gesture with one hand.

“No.” Black’s scowl was fearsome, managing to look annoyed and disappointed at the same time as he turned towards Red, “It was you.”

Blue sat down with a toss of his head, “See?! That was slander!”

“Me what, cuppycake?” Red put both his elbows on the table, looking smug as shrugged in an infuriatingly flippant matter. “Lie? Cheat? Of fuckin’ course! What kinda star-eyed bruto ain’t fuckin’ check, eh?”

“ ‘Kinda gamesman fesses up?” Slim leaned on the table, gold teeth glinting in a lopsided smile, “Black’d call that’d confession. I’d say yer just a dumbass.”

“HAH!” Red threw his his head back in uproarious laughter, smile wide and sharp as he dug his fingers into the tabletop, “Takes one t’know one, wardog!”

“Your bet is cancelled and the money you put into the pool forfeit,” Black nursed his new drink like he had a headache, “On account of poor sportsmanship and being stupid enough to blatantly confess to it.”

“What?!” Red slammed his fist down on the table, sizing up against Black on his side, “Ya fuckin’ huevon-!”

Edge finally spoke up, sounding almost bored, “When one is burned, it’s natural they would seek an expedient and convenient salve,” He rested his chin on his fist,  a challenging glint to his eyes, “Who knew money was what soothed a royal guard the most? Or perhaps it’s a more personal problem?”

Oh no. Stretch didn’t like getting involved in this fellverse bullshit- too much posturing and exaggerated reactions that made it hard to tell when a real fight was about to break out or not- but Black’s eyelights went out. And his skull flushed a dark purple as positively murderous intent started to radiate off of him. Fuck.

“Black!” He knew this was a terrible idea even before he felt everyone’s attention shift to him, trying very hard to ignore the alarmed expression on Blue’s face. “So, buddy-“

Edge gave no outward indication of concern, but he did kick him under the table. Hard. “What’d you bet? Betcha agreed with your bro, right?”

Black stared at him, hard, for a long moment- long enough Edge had dropped the pretense of indifference to grab onto Stretch’s legs in a vice grip to yank him away at a moment’s notice. Red had a bone attack clenched in his fist. As did Blue, and Slim was sitting up alert and his eye- Yeah, ok, fuck-

“Let’s all calm down and have another drink, yeah?” Despite his laidback demeanor, there was a hard undertone to Comic’s words that sent a chill across the whole table. “If you Fellies got something to settle, take it outside. I like this bar, and it’d be a real shame if we were kicked out because a couple of boneheads couldn’t play nice.”

Comic gave a long sigh as he leaned back into the couch cushions, “S’not my place to say, but I don’t think Stretch’s having all that great a time. I know I’m not, and I don’t think Paps ‘n Blue are either.”

No one said anything.

“Well...” Stretch appreciated the attempted save, but this new chastised atmosphere of morose but still combative monsters wasn’t much better. Comic was looking like he regretted getting involved.

“All’s fair in love and war, right? I was hoping we’d be heavier on the love tonight,” Stretch waved his arm vaguely, shrugging with a forced smile, “But I’ll take what I can get. Let’s just, uh, lighten up on the liquor, and-“

“Fine.” Black was still seething, arms crossed tightly as he tossed his head imperiously, “Your money is still forfeited.”

“What?!” Red actually looked surprised, slamming his fist onto the table with a snarl, “What fer?!”

Blue cupped his hands around his mouth like a megaphone, “You just admitted to cheating, bonehead!”

“Shh!” Red made an odd flicking gesture at Blue, “Buss out, Baby Blue! Always such a goddamn metiche!” He turned back to Black comparatively, completely ignoring Stretch who put his head down on the table. “S’ain’t-“

“I’m being lenient since you seem to have gone completely native,” Black gave Red a withering glare, “If this were in a Fellverse, I would have taken your hand as collateral.”

“Sans.”

Slim was usually so silent and unassuming, it was easy to forget he was there- but his quiet voice held tremendous power. He held a silent staring contest with Black for a long time, until Black finally looked away with a derisive toss of his head, “Like I said: I’m being lenient. Pray I don’t change my mind.”

Slim sighed wearily, leaning back on his seat and tossing his head over the head rest. He lifted his arm and started playing with his bracelets again, but at least everyone settled down. Even Red, who had Edge’s hand clamping his jaw shut firmly.

“I’m still not sure what gave you the ridiculous notion that I would deign to participate in something so trivial,” Black scoffed, leaning back against the seat as he crossed his arms. Ugh. And Edge had wanted- had especially specifically specified this asshole needed to be invited too. Stretch eyed the honey mead, only inches away from his face, longingly.

“However! If I had placed a bet, which I am not confirming I did-“ He understood now why the Fellverses tended to drink heavily among each other, but if they knew it was going to make them more combative, why did they even meet up at all? It couldn’t be that they actually enjoyed each other’s company, could it? “Then it would have been on that one. For obvious reasons.”

He didn’t need to look up to know Black was talking about him. “Forreal, what are you guys talking about?” Stretch turned his head to look at Slim, who just hunched further in on himself. “Is it my stats? The lack of fangs? My rounded edges?”

“Nothing worth worrying about,” Edge gave each Fell monster a cool look before turning back to his husband, “As you well know, value judgements based solely on cursory stat CHECKs are neither accurate nor effective.”

Oh yeah. During that minor freak out after Dyna’s checkup, Edge had told him Red was thinking along Underfell lines when he made those caustic comments. Something about Edge’s stats being better for defense of a pregnant partner, so it’d make more sense if Stretch was actually the pregnant one- yeah, okay. It would make sense other Fell monsters would come to that same conclusion too. And they would assumed Edge had too, and that as a couple, they had decided to go the ‘logical’ route. This was gonna be explosive to see play out- hopefully no actual explosions involved though.

Stretch tuned back into the tail end of a surprisingly civil argument between Edge and Black

“-And CHECKs won’t tell you a monster’s motivations or reasonings, their fears and specialties, which makes it incomplete!” Edge slammed his fist onto the table. “And they’re also very easy to manipulate into displaying false data!”

“What?!” Black looked honestly horrified, which seemed like an incredibly out of place emotion on his face, “They are not easy to ‘manipulate’- they have some of the strictest protocols and tightest security of all display mechanics! Conscripts can’t even change the color of their names without a royal reprimand!”

“Conscripts?” Edge blinked, flabbergasted, “A royal reprimand? Who has time-?”

“Um,” Classic had been shifting uncomfortably throughout every tense period, murmuring to Blue in hushed voices, before raising his voice again, “We haven’t heard from Sans yet! My Sans! Chexmix! No, wait- Cosmic! Er, Comic!”

Comic opened a single eye with a widening grin, not dozing quite as deeply as he made it seem, “Honest mixtake, Bro, no sweaturn.”

Blue and Classic rolled their eyes in unison, giving each other shared looks of annoyance. “Mix-take was good, points for well-timed creativity- but sweat-urn was weak!“

Comic’s smile just seemed to grow, leaning forward conspiratorially, theatrically whispering, “Should I Apollogize?”

Classic sighed, resting his head in his hands, “That’s a reach, but better than your usual material. Please just answer the question, brother.”

“Always so Sirius, bro, but ok- I’ll finish this off with a Big Bang,”He winked at Stretch, who had given him an appreciative salute. “Well, I put my bet in with my buddy Stretch here.”

Stretch hung his head with a sigh, “I guess I’m just more Papternal than I realized, a bonDadfied old man.”

“Nice,” Comic held his hand out for a fist bump, “I figured babies are a skeleton of work on your body, and who better than a lazybones to chill and let Pancake do their thing? Soulings are also gonna do all sorts of weird stuff to your body you can’t control, so a relaxed, carefree attitude is gonna be really helpful.”

He sighed, shrugging with a wink towards Edge, “But I’m starting to think I’m out 40g, huh?”

Edge’s expression shifted from preoccupied to considering in a moment, silent except for drumming his fingers on the table thoughtfully. He made a point to make and keep eye contact with everyone at the table, smiling almost coyly. With a nonchalant shrug, he slid the mug in Classic’s direction.

Stretch took advantage of the stunned silence to help himself to the other mug, “Yay, this one is finally mine~”

Then everything got LOUD.

[Part 1 ] [Part 2 - Here! ] [Part 3] [Part 4] [Part 5] [Part 6]

#spicyhoney #Underfell Papyrus #underswap papyrus #underfell sans #underswap sans #swapfell sans #swapfell papyrus #undertale sans #undertale papyrus #skelepreg #fanfic #redvelvetreel #red sans #blue sans #edge papyrus #stretch papyrus #classic papyrus #comic sans

[granteares]

parswoops prompt: swoops gets traded (possibly to the falcs?) so maybe just cute stuff him and kent do when they see each other... and i love your icons btw

3 months late is better than not at all, right…? i’m so sorry this took me so long((((( muse didn’t want to cooperate and i legit rewrote this like 5 million times until i was happy with it. i hope you see this, and that you like it!! i love these soft boys so much ;w;

and thank you so much i’m glad you enjoy the icons i’ve made so far!!))))))

i’ve also added this to my ao3!!!

When Jeff gets traded to the Falconers in the off-season, Kent truly isn’t sure for a good few weeks how he’s going to survive it.

It’s stupid, because he’s been through worse.

Like, a lot worse.

And Jeff assures him that they’ll make it work, promises him.

But it almost feels like a rotten cherry on top of a shit cake, like a kick in the balls, another big old fuck you from the universe, because the only person who’s ever made him feel like things could be okay is leaving– and not just anywhere. If he’d been traded to literally any other team, Kent would have been able to cope, would have been able to believe Jeff’s promises. The Falcs, though, they’re Jack’s team, and since he had signed with them two seasons ago, Kent has noticed a different kind of tension during their games. They know something, Kent doesn’t know how they couldn’t, and they hate him for it.

And his boyfriend is going right into it, and Kent is convinced that there’s a slim chance Jeff won’t come out of it hating him, too.

If Jeff comes to hate him, Kent doesn’t know what he’s going to do.

He takes advantage of how they can still be together for a month, before Jeff decides he should go to Providence and find a place to live and settle into his brand-spanking-new life while Kent tries not to panic.

_/ x \_

But Jeff’s promises are, actually, accurate. They’re halfway through the season on opposite sides of the country and they’re still together. They haven’t seen each other in months, but they talk on the phone– if not on Skype– every day, and every day, Jeff still says ‘I love you, Kenny’– and knowing Jeff was in close proximity to Jack, hearing that name had made him flinch the first few times– so Kent thinks Jeff was right. He thinks that, and hears Jeff’s voice inside his head, laughing and saying ‘I’m always right, baby.’

When the Aces get to their bye-week halfway through the season, Kent practically invites himself over to Jeff’s new apartment in Providence. The Falcs’ bye-week isn’t for a few months yet, but they got lucky enough that the games the Falcs are playing that week are all at home. Jeff will be busy, but they’ll get his free time to be together and Kent is practically buzzing with the excited energy he feels as he finally gets off the plane and is trying not to fucking sprint to baggage claim where Jeff said he’d be waiting for him.

The problem with that, though, is that when Jeff spots him in the airport and closes the distance between them, they can’t kiss, don’t feel comfortable doing more than that stupid bro-hug, and Kent needs more than that, and he knows Jeff does, too. As quickly as possible, they gather Kent’s suitcase, and head to the short-term parking lot; they walk close enough that they can accidentally brush arms or fingers, and it sends a jolt through Kent every time, and it’s a good interim until they get to Jeff’s place.

They’re in the car, and Jeff’s hand is on Kent’s thigh as he uses the other on the steering wheel. “The guys tend to pop in, sometimes, just… so you know,” Jeff warns, sounding hesitant. And Kent knows why: because he tenses at the idea of Falconers waltzing into Jeff’s place and seeing him there. They know Jeff is pansexual, know he has a boyfriend, but Kent wasn’t willing to let Jeff tell them who that boyfriend is. “You know they don’t hate you, right, babe?” Jeff squeezes his thigh, and Kent nods automatically. It isn’t the first time Jeff has told him that, or the fifth. Jeff has told him how there’s plenty of players on the Falconers who praise his skills and the ones who have had conversations with him say he’s a good guy– but he continues to avoid telling him anything about Jack, or Jack’s reaction toward anything Kent-related. “I really think they’d be more than okay about it, if I told them we’re together.” Because Jeff hates keeping secrets from his team– and it’s hard to think that his team isn’t Kent’s team anymore– and Kent does know that Jeff wants to tell them if Kent is ready to.

“Let’s– Can we not, right now?” Kent replies. “Not today?” He looks over at Jeff, who takes his eyes off the road for a second to glance back at Kent and give a little nod of assent. “I’m here for a week, we can talk about it later, I promise.”

“I’d rather just enjoy you today, too,” Jeff agrees, and Kent feels himself relax again. He takes his hand off Kent’s thigh for a moment to grab his phone from the center console, and hand it to Kent. “Chinese for dinner? My nutritionist will kill me, but I think you’re worth a cheat day,” Jeff explains. “There’s a great fucking place not far from the apartment, we can grab it on the way if you want to order it now.”

“Yeah,” Kent says, unlocking Jeff’s phone– because of course his passcode hasn’t changed, still 1490, the fucking sap– and finding the contact simply labeled ‘Chinese Food.’ Kent already knows their orders– except for when Jeff pokes him in the side and mutters ‘Get some crab rangoon, too, fucking divine here’– and goes through the process quickly enough.

When they get to the apartment, Jeff grabs Kent’s travel bags, because “You’ve got the important shit, bro, carry the food”– and proceeds to take it to where Kent is guessing the master bedroom is, while Kent is left to divvy out the Chinese food in the kitchen. He hasn’t seen Jeff’s place before, and that fact bites at him a little, but it feels comfortable the same way Jeff’s condo in Las Vegas had. It’s already decorated with most of the same things, although there’s a much more rustic feel– the building is obviously older, a converted house, the opposite of the sleek modernity to Vegas. It fits Jeff better, though, Kent thinks.

Kent forgets the food and his thoughts the second that he feels Jeff’s arms wrap around him, though, turning and allowing himself to be pinned against the edge of the counter.

“Fancy meeting you here,” Jeff murmurs.

Kent laughs. “Fucking dork. Just kiss me.”

Jeff rolls his eyes, but leans further into Kent’s space. The kiss they share is long and certainly verging on desperate, and if Kent ever doubted that Jeff truly did miss him, he told himself he never would again because of the way Jeff is holding onto him like he’s never going to let go again.

But eventually he does, and Kent is sucking in shaking breaths and he’s a little hard in his pants– and he can feel Jeff is too– but mostly he’s hungry and longing for the casual nights he hasn’t gotten in so long, where they would sit on the couch just being together: no pressures, no expectations, no overthinking. Those kind of stupid domestic nights Kent hadn’t even known he’d wanted and that had taken months of dating Jeff to achieve.

“C’mon, I’m fucking hungry,” Kent grumbles, prodding Jeff’s chest even as he’s stepping away and grabbing plates from a cabinet and utensils from a drawer.

They divvy out the food onto plates, then head back to the living room and settle on the couch. “All yours,” Jeff offers, pushing the remote to Kent on the coffee table to let Kent pick, like he always does, and Kent feels his chest tighten for a moment because even though everything is different on the surface, everything is ultimately the same, and the relief he feels is so immense he struggles not to show it in front of Jeff– who would certainly ask what was up, and then Kent would have to talk about his feelings. Which wasn’t bad, with Jeff, but the last thing he wanted to do tonight.

Kent spends some time going through Netflix, but ultimately settles onto something silly they’ve watched a dozen times before so that they can concentrate more on each other than a plotline of something on the television.

They eat in silence for a while, and it’s fine with Kent, because it’s the soft and comfortable silence that is one of Kent’s favorite things about being with Jeff. Kent gets his fill, puts his plate down on the coffee table, and then gets himself comfy by turning himself sideways on the couch and throwing his legs in Jeff’s lap after the man raises his plate up.

When Jeff finally puts his plate aside, Kent doesn’t even hesitate a second before crawling into Jeff’s lap and settling there. Jeff, almost like it’s instinctual, wraps his arms around him, one hand positioned so he can play with the hair against Kent’s neck, a little longer than usual because it’s that point in the season where he can’t be bothered to keep up with haircuts and shaving regularly. Kent nuzzles his face into Jeff’s neck, pressing kisses and soft nips to the skin. “You smell so good, shit,” Kent murmurs into skin, “I’ve missed you so much, Swoops.”

“Missed you, Parser,” Jeff answers back, shifting to draw Kent’s head away from his neck and meeting his lips instead.

Kent is happy to make-out lazily and slowly for a while, until Jeff complains his leg is falling asleep and they reposition themselves.

The couch in Jeff’s living room was brought from Las Vegas, and it’s comfortable and worn and just wide enough that Jeff can spoon him but they have to press close together– which is always perfectly fine by Kent. They lay like that for a while, watching more stupid movies, until Jeff is prodding at him, and saying: “Parse, wake up, if you’re gonna fall asleep we might as well go lay in bed.”

“M’not sleepin’,” Kent protests.

Jeff laughs quietly, Kent feels the rumble in his chest and the breath huff on his neck. “Sure, Kent, okay.” He pushes at Kent, gently, but enough that he rolls a bit closer to the edge of the couch. “Up you get. Bed’s comfier, anyway. You’ll bitch all day tomorrow about your neck if you sleep here.”

Kent sighs, because Jeff is always right, goddamn it. He pulls himself out of Jeff’s arms reluctantly, even though he knows he’ll be back in them shortly, and gets to his feet. He follows Jeff down the hallway to the master bedroom, which also has a large bathroom attached. Kent rushes through his bedtime rituals, looking forward to how great he knows Jeff’s bed is.

In just boxer shorts now, he crawls into the side he always slept on when the bed was in Jeff’s Vegas condo, and Jeff gets in on the other side. It’s only a short moment later that they’re tangled together in the middle of the bed, and Kent sighs contentedly, not having quite realized how off-kilter he truly felt without Jeff’s physical presence with him.

#parsepositive #parswoops #troyson #kent parson #jeff troy #swoops #jeff swoops troy #check please #omgcp #omgcp fic #check please fic #cp fic #omgficpls #anonymous #answer

[nurseperriestyles-blog]

Only Angel

A/N: Man oh man it took me forever to write this. I love Halloween and really wanted to post it, though, even if it’s late. Sorry for any mistakes or typos. Halloween, modern AU. <33

--

It was cold and damp and misty. The streetlights looming over the road bathed the wet asphalt in orange light, making it look as if it were glowing. The moon was hidden behind a thick wall of clouds that seldom broke apart. The trick-or-treaters had long since gone home, leaving the sidewalks empty except for discarded candy wrappers and the occasional group of teenagers that had somehow eluded a curfew.   

Every now and then, about one hundred yards away, one of the streetlight’s bulbs would overheat and the light would go out, draping that section of road in darkness before flickering on again after several minutes.

Levi kept his eyes on that spot of road, wondering if he watched long enough, when the light burst back to life, someone or something might suddenly be standing there. It was unlikely and too much like a bad movie, but the thought kept him from focusing too much on his impatience.

Hange had told him she would pick him up fifteen minutes ago, but she was nowhere to be seen.

He considered turning around and walking back into his apartment, but he didn’t want to walk all the way back outside when Hange decided to arrive, so he stayed put, eyeing the streetlight that refused to stay lit. At the moment, it was off, and Levi couldn’t pull his eyes from the twenty yard wide void.

Levi heaved a sigh and found comfort in the way the cold air stung his lungs. It made him almost miss smoking, a habit he had picked up as an angsty, rebellious teenager. He’d had several different foster parents by the age of seventeen, but the last family he had was especially maddening and he did almost anything he could possibly do to piss them off. When he found out that his foster ‘dad’ had been cigarette free for twenty years, he made sure to leave cartons lying about in not so subtle places, or he’d smoke two cigarettes right before entering the house everyday after school, just to fuck with the man, but he never said a word..which Levi supposed was worse.

Not that they were abusive or cruel or anything particularly horrible; they were nice people. The only decent family any of the social workers had bothered to find him. He supposed that’s why he had hated them so much. He had never belonged with that kind of family. Levi was not that kind of person.

A pair of headlights broke Levi from his thoughts.At first, his hopes had grown, thinking it was Hange; then he realized that Hange would be coming from the opposite way. The headlights sliced through the absence of light underneath the faulty lamp, and the nerve-grating sound of rubber sliding to a sudden halt met Levi's ears. He couldn't make out exactly what was happening, for the headlights were the god forsaken bright blue LED lights that the cocksure, meat-headed young men favored. They caused Levi to squint his eyes and wince slightly, all while muttering curses under his breath.

He was going to kill Hange when she pulled up.

Levi could hear loud music spilling out of the car when the passenger's side door swung open, and he could hear a feminine voice hurling the word 'fuck' at whoever was driving. Suddenly, the door slammed shut and the car peeled out, the tires almost losing traction on the wet road. Levi watched as the car, a brand new Ford Mustang, zipped past him with windows tinted so dark, he couldn't see inside. He could tell, though, by the ridiculous rims and spoiler, that the driver was probably a sharp-jawed dim-wit who addressed people as 'bro.'

When Levi looked back down the road, the light popped back on, and an angel was standing there.

It was movie-esque, really, the way she was just..there. He couldn't make out details from so far away, but she was unmistakably an angel. White,feathered wings sprouted from her back, a halo made with yellow glitter was alight from the lamp above her. The white dress she wore was glowing with an ethereal look that was almost unnerving.

She had her arms crossed over her middle, rubbing her hands up and down her undoubtedly cold arms, and she watched as the Mustang sped away. She stilled when she noticed Levi, and with an awkward wave, Levi finally recognized her.

Perrie Styles had been living in the same apartment complex as Levi for a year now, though he had never properly spoken to her. Any communication they had was either a smile smile as they crossed paths, or a 'how are you' if they were in the public laundry room at the same time. Sometimes, if the washing machine ate her quarters, he’d hear a slew of “fucks” and “shits” spilling out of her mouth. He knew that she was an ER nurse, not that he was stalking her or anything. She usually always wore scrubs and an ER name tag.

From the first time he saw her, he was only a bit enchanted by her, and a bit annoyed. She was polite, sweet and friendly to everyone, including Levi. She always smiled and said hello, she called people ‘sir’ or ‘ma’am’ and she never lost her patience with people when she spoke to them. He hated when she was nice to him; he didn’t deserve that.

Perrie slowly made her way towards Levi, taking deliberate steps to gauge his reaction. At his slightest twitch of discomfort, she would probably find a way to awkwardly play it off and walk back into the apartment building behind them. Levi, not wanting to scare her off, gently pivoted his body towards her, letting her know she was more than welcome to approach him.

As she came closer, he could make out her sheepish expression. He wondered why she had been dropped off on the side of the road like an unwanted animal. The thought irked him.

“Vampire?” she peeled one arm off the top of the other to point at him. He supposed the small trickle of blood on his chin tipped her off since he was only donning his everyday clothes.

He bared his teeth to her, letting her see the fake vampire fangs he had slipped over his cuspids. His eyes showed his disdain for the ‘costume’; it had been forced on him by Mike and Erwin, who were hosting the party Hange was supposed to be picking him up for. They had informed him that he were to dress up on his own, or the group was going to jump him at the party and force some horrid Wal-Mart face paint on him, and god knew Levi was not going to allow that. His skin crawled at the thought of all of their nasty hands smearing that goop on his face.

“I love it.” Perrie beamed.

“I like yours, too.” he stated, nodding towards her.

Perrie thanked him through a tight lipped smile, causing him to frown.

“Your night seems to have been cut short.” Levi cringed at how awkward he sounded, but Perrie simply shrugged.

“He was an asshole, so I made him bring me home before we even got to the party we were going to. That’s the last time I’ll ever let my cousin set me up on a date.” she sighed and shook her head, her eyes staring down the road.

“I’m sorry to hear that.” Levi said sincerely, stuffing his hands in his coat pockets, looking up at the streetlight above him.

“It’s fine..” Perrie trailed, looking back at Levi and smiling. “So, are you turning tricks out here or what?”

Levi blinked at her, causing her to blush slightly.

“You’re just standing on the side of the road..at night..all alone..” she explained slowly, avoiding his eyes and feeling silly. Levi realized what she had meant and chuckled, feeling like an ass.

“Oh, no. I’m waiting on my friend. We’re going to a party and she’s supposed to pick me up..” Levi glanced back down the road, his irritation with Hange for being late struggling with his reluctance to stop talking to Perrie.

“Why are you waiting on the side of the road?” Perrie inquired.

“She told me she was out here..twenty-five minutes ago.” Levi muttered, causing Perrie to snort.

“Oh, man. You need better friends.” Perrie laughed.

“You have absolutely no idea.” Levi ran a hand through his hair and smiled softly to himself. His friends were total assholes, but he wasn’t really sure what he’d do without them. They were the ones that needed a better friend than him.

“Hey, if you think she’ll be much longer, I have some hot chocolate I can make, if you’d wanna--oh, wait, here comes someone now.” Perrie pointed over Levi’s shoulder, and when he turned to look (all while praying to whatever god was listening that it was not Hange) he saw the familiar silver Volkswagen bug pulling up beside them.

Hange rolled down the window, a grin spread across the entirety of her face. Levi noticed she was wearing glasses larger than her usual ones, and an orange turtleneck. Her hair was down for once, and he assumed she was supposed to be Velma from Scooby Doo.

“This your date? You didn’t tell anyone!”

Had Levi not known how to control his face so well, it would have turned beet red.

Moblit leaned over her from the passenger’s side, a look of surprise and awe on his face.

“She’s an angel.” he said dumbly, causing Perrie to laugh.

“Hardly.” she replied, waving her hand at him.

“She isn’t my date, just my neighbor.” Levi wanted to cut his own tongue out for being so blunt, almost more than he wanted to rip Hange’s face off.

“So, she isn’t coming?” Hange and Moblit both looked crestfallen, and an idea suddenly struck Levi.

“Would you want to?” he asked, turning to her and catching her off guard.

She looked nervously between the three of them, unsure of what to say.

“I-I really don’t want to impose..” Levi felt bad for putting her on the spot like that, but for some stupid, nagging reason, he hoped against hope he could convince her to agree.

“You wouldn't be imposing at all. Please, let us take you out. It’ll make up for your bad date, and you wouldn’t have had to get all dressed up for no reason.” Levi was able to keep his voice neutral, not wanting to freak her out or anything. She hardly knew him, and didn’t know his friends at all.

Perrie mulled it over, rocking back and forth on her feet. A few strands of her messy blonde hair began to wrap themselves around the stem of her halo as a chilly breeze began to blow, and Levi tried not to stare at her too much..even though he was completely transfixed.

“Okay, fine. But you have to promise me you’re not all a bunch of douchebag, frat boys that have no respect for--”

“Angels.” Hange finished for her with a wink, causing Perrie to giggle. “Alrighty, then, let’s go! Moblit, out, out, out!”

Seeing as Hange drove the smallest car known to mankind, fitting four adults inside was a bit of a game of Tetris. Moblit unfolded himself from the front seat, allowing Levi and Perrie to see his costume for the first time.

“Giddy up.” Perrie piped with a smile.

Moblit flushed and moved his cowboy hat and lasso out of the back seat so Perrie could squeeze in.

“It was last minute..” Moblit replied, avoiding her eyes.

“Isn’t it adorable? He was supposed to be my Scooby, but I think this is cuter.’” Hange gushed, causing Moblit’s face to turn even more red. Levi let out the slightest snort of amusement before shuffling into the car behind Perrie, trying not to ruin her wings. There were already a few loose feathers in the seat beside her. As Moblit got back into the front seat, Levi and Perrie struggled to adjust themselves, neither one wanting to smush the other. Luckily, Perrie was about the size of a ten year old child, except her wings were poking his arm in an awkward manner.

“Lean up and let me put it behind you. Then you can lean back against it. It won’t matter if they bend or anything.” Perrie instructed, and Levi did as she said, resulting in her shimming closer to him to where there was hardly any space between them. Levi caught Hange’s smug grin in the rearview mirror and he had to resist kicking her seat.

“So, I’m Hange Zoe and this here is Moblit Berner. What’s your name?” Hange asked in a sing-song voice.

“Perrie Styles.”

“And Levi said you’re his neighbor? Are you two...close?” the implication in Hange’s voice earned her a glare from Levi and a blush from Perrie.

“Actually, I think tonight is the first time we’ve properly spoken.” Perrie responded, her fingers fiddling with the hem of her dress anxiously. Levi noticed her run her tongue over her lip in the spot he knew she chewed (not that he stalked her); he figured she was refraining from biting it so she didn’t ruin her perfect pink lipstick.

As Hange continued to interrogate Perrie, Levi tried to focus on the world whizzing past the car and not the smell of Perrie’s candy-like perfume, or the way her knee would bumps his as Hange hit potholes.

“Levi said you had a bad date tonight, didn’t he?” Levi rolled his eyes at how rude Hange could be sometimes.

“That’s not really any of your--” he started, but he felt Perrie shrug against his shoulder.

“Nah, it’s fine. My cousin Ty set me up with one of his shit-head friends. He tried feeling me up on the ride there without even bothering to be like, ‘hey, can I finger blast ya real quick?’”

Hange and Moblit burst into laughter and Perrie chuckled to herself. Even Levi tilted his head back as a sudden bubble of laughter made its way out of him.

For the rest of the ride, he stayed silent and listened to the three of them get to know each other, and he realized that each of them were good people, better people than him; he tried not to pay attention to that fucking voice in his head that told him he wasn’t anywhere good enough to be in the same car with these people, much less be friends with them. It was there though, and his mood was starting to sour.

“Will there be a lot of people here?” Perrie’s soft voice pulled Levi back inside of the car and he shrugged.

“Maybe not even twenty. Just our close friends.” he said, looking over at her. He tried not to jerk back when he noticed how close their faces were, but his heart slammed against his ribs nonetheless.

Her gray-blue eyes were wide and full of nerves, and she was biting her lip.

And for some reason, some absolutely fucking insane reason, he reached his hand towards her face, and with his index finger tilting her chin up, he used his thumb to pop her lip out from between her teeth.

Her brows were slightly raised in surprise, their eyes locked on each other for several tense seconds. Levi fought to control his face, keeping his bored expression locked and unwavering, despite the anxiety bubbling underneath his skin.

This girl is never going to speak to me again.

He tried to will the thoughts away, tried to ignore them, but he couldn’t. He had just crossed so many lines, and at the worst possible moment.

Who the fuck are you to touch her? She’s a goddamn angel.

She had literally just told them how she ended a date because a guy touched her without her consent, and now here he was, touching her. He scowled on the inside, thinking that if anyone had touched his mouth with their grubby finger, he’d have ripped it off and shoved it up their ass.

But..then she grinned, a blush dusting her pale cheeks and causing Levi to almost drop dead right there in Hange’s backseat.

Levi cocked his head to the side, relief jetting throughout his veins, and allowed  a small smirk to break the mask.

“We’re heeeere!” Hange’s shrill, nerve-wracking voice snaked itself between Levi and Perrie, effectively breaking them apart and ending the moment.

Levi sighed and waited for Moblit to get out of the car and pull the front seat forward, freeing them. As Perrie tried to maneuver herself out of the car without hurting her wings, Levi stepped forward and held the passenger’s seat belt out of her way, and held his other hand out for her to take.

He felt fire spread across his skin at the contact of her dainty, cold hand.

You don’t deserve this.

Levi watched the way she kept close to him as they made their way into Erwin’s house; she smiled at everyone she saw, but also averted her eyes when she noticed someone staring curiously at her.

The first to greet them was Connie, Jean and Sasha, who were standing on Erwin’s front porch daring each other do be the first to do a keg stand. When the trio caught sight of Hange and Moblit, they waved and gushed at their costumes.

Jean, who was dressed in a black pinstriped vest and pants, a felt black hat on his head, was obviously a 20’s gangster. He noticed Perrie first, but was surprisingly smart enough not to make a comment about her to Levi. Much to everyone’s amusement, Connie was dressed as a flapper girl, dress and all, after he had lost a bet with Jean, but he was much too drunk by now to be remotely embarrassed. Sasha sported a red cape with a hood and a basket in her hand, obviously Little Red Riding Hood; she was the one to mention Perrie first.

“Levi brought a date?” she was more than a little tipsy, and she sloppily pointed at Perrie, who was standing just behind Levi for protection. He liked the thought of that.

“Just a friend.” he corrected in an icy tone that would have shut the girl up had she been sober. Unfortunately, she was not.

“She’s hot, why isn’t she your date?”

Jean stifled a laugh and Levi sneered, but Hange stepped in before he could lay into the poor girl.

“Hey, who was going to do that keg stand?” she asked, drawing Sasha’s attention away from Perrie and Levi.

At least she’s good for something.

Levi glanced back at Perrie, who was smiling as she watched Jean and Sasha debate who would go first, while Hange and Moblit made sure Connie didn’t vomit all over himself.

“Wanna go inside? The rest of them are a little less..” he trailed off, nodding towards the group on the porch.

“Nosey?” Perrie finished for him as she began walking towards the door.

“I was going to say stupid, but that works, too.” Levi quipped, making Perrie laugh.

Levi led her inside, where the sound of music and chatter filled the air.

Erwin’s house was fairly large, so everyone was spread out in clusters. Levi noticed Mikasa and Armin in one corner of the living room, watching as someone in a horse mask (who he assumed was Eren) tried to do shots through the mask’s elongated mouth. Mikasa was dressed as Wednesday Addams, her dark hair in two braids and wearing a black dress with chunky black boots. Armin was simply wearing devil horns and a red T-shirt. Mikasa and Armin looked shocked when they saw Levi with Perrie, but they kept their distance.

“Oh, cool. It’s Sandy and Danny.” Levi heard Perrie say, and he looked across the room and saw Historia and Ymir. Historia had shed her usual innocent, coy look for the night and was wearing the classic black body suit from Grease. Her blonde hair was a mass of kinky curls, and she had a striking red lipstick on. Ymir was in a leather jacket and black pants, her hair slicked back. Her face was wearing its usual ‘fuck off’ expression.

“Want to get something to drink?” Levi pointed to the kitchen, hoping that no one else would notice them until he had at least some alcohol in his system. When Perrie nodded, he gently lay his hand on the small of her back and led her toward the kitchen.

“Oi, Levi!”

Oh, fuck me.

Levi stopped midway through the room and looked in the direction of his name.

“You didn’t tell me you were bringing someone.” Erwin Smith stood tall above Levi and Perrie, his eyes sparkling with a mischief Levi knew all too well.

“It was last minute.” Levi replied, hoping that Perrie wasn’t growing annoyed by all of the attention she was getting.

“I see. Erwin Smith, nice to meet you.” Erwin was all smiles and charm as he held his hand out to Perrie, who meekly shook it.

“Perrie Styles.” her voice was small. Levi assumed she was a bit intimidated by Erwin, who had the ability to fill an entire room with his presence. He was dressed as some kind of king or someone royal, in crimson and gold, Levi didn’t know exactly who he was supposed to be. His right hand was wrapped in bloody cloth, making it appear as if it had been cut off.

“You look almost exactly like him, except for the eyes.” Perrie commented, gesturing at Erwin’s costume. This caused Erwin to raise his brows.

“I had thought about doing green contacts, but decided against it.” Erwin said with a shrug.

“It’s still a great costume, nonetheless. Jaime Lannister is a great character. Book Jaime, that is.”

“I agree. Levi, where’d you get this one? I like her?” Erwin’s sly smile caused Levi to roll his eyes.

“The side of the road.” Perrie offered, and Erwin guffawed.

“Alright then. I’ll let you two enjoy the party. It’s nice to meet you, Perrie.” Erwin winked at Levi before walking off to join Hange and Moblit, who were now in the center of the living room talking to Mike.

Levi took Perrie’s hand and led her into the kitchen, hoping it would be empty and they would be spared a second alone.

Unfortunately, Annie, Reiner and Bertolt were standing at the bar, pouring shots for themselves. Reiner was topless and wearing torn up, bloody shorts. His face was painted like a wolf, and he had in yellow contacts. Bertolt had his face painted green, and bolts suck out of his neck, an obvious Frankenstein. Annie didn’t even bother to dress up at all.

“Hey, Levi! Want a--oh, shit. That’s a chick.” Reiner’s grin fell when he saw Perrie, a surprised look replacing it. Annie rolled her eyes and pushed herself off of the bar, excusing herself from the room; she had less patience than Levi.

“Hi, I’m Perrie.” she waved at the two gaping idiots and Reiner began to grin again, while Bertolt shyly averted his gaze.

“I’m Reiner.”

“Bertolt.”

“I’m sure she’s charmed, now scram.” Levi jerked his thumb towards the door and they two quickly grabbed their shots and hurried back into the living room. Perrie smiled at them as they waved at her.

“You must not bring many girls around them.” she said when they were alone.

“With good reason.” Levi replied, grabbing two Solo cups. “What would you like to drink?”

Perrie examined the bar. It was full of assorted snacks and drinks on one end, and bottles and cans of alcohol on the other.

“Red Bull and Vodka.”

Levi began mixing her drink and handed it to her, earning him a sweet ‘thank you.’

“Sorry they’re so annoying.” Levi sighed after making his own drink. Perrie shrugged.

“They’re just curious.”

“And rude.”

Perrie laughed and nodded. “Just a bit.”

Levi watched from the doorway as Mikasa tried to prevent Eren from doing something stupid, tugging on his arm and glaring at the back of his head. Erwin was nodding as Mike (who was dressed as a pirate, a fake parrot on his shoulder) talked animatedly, almost hitting Moblit in the face with the back of his hand. Ymir was listening to something Historia was whispering in her ear, and she suddenly looked towards the kitchen, probably trying to get a look at Perrie. Connie, Jean and Sasha had rejoined the mix, all stumbling and laughing loudly. Even little Armin was lazily swaying to the music.

“We can go back out there, if you want.” Levi said, nodding towards the rest of the group.

Perrie shook her head.

“I’m fine here, if you are.” she said, and Levi fought a smile. They were both leaning against the bar, her wing touching his shoulder.

“I’m fine here, too.”

--

“Thank you for inviting me. I had a nice time.”

Perrie and Levi were back on the sidewalk in front of their apartment complex after being dropped off by Hange. It was around two in the morning, the party having ended when Eren announced that he was dressed up as Jean, and the two began to brawl in Erwin’s front yard.

Until that point, though, the night had gone well. Everyone eventually got too drunk to care that Levi had brought a girl, and they treated Perrie as if she was an old friend. Though it took a bit for her to open up and have fun, she eventually joined them in drinking games and even a little bit of dancing at the insistence of Sasha and Connie.

“I’m glad you had fun.” Levi responded, shoving his hands in his pockets. He felt awkward and unsure and too tipsy to think clearly. He had really enjoyed the night, too, but with each drink, his self doubt and that fucking voice in the back of his mind grew.

Perrie was a sweet girl. She was smart, kind and brilliant. She had a quick wit that could keep up with Erwin, she had a sense of humor that made Reiner blush, and she wasn’t afraid to be herself at all. She was all of those kind, nice things that everyone had slurred drunkenly about her to Levi when she wasn’t in earshot. She was a good person.

And Levi didn’t deserve that.

They stood on the damp sidewalk, the cold air nipping at their skin. Perrie was smiling, because of course she was, and Levi was staring at the faulty lamp again, wishing he was better.

“I still have that hot chocolate, if you wanna come in.”

Perrie’s voice was nervous and unsure, but her pretty pink smile stayed in place. He stared at her for a moment and watched as she chewed her lip.

She had long since abandoned her halo and wings, they now dangled in her hand. Her hair was an absolute mess and had something Levi assumed was red lipstick in it. Her under eyes were smudged with purple and she looked tipsy and worn out. He wanted to kiss her then, under that faulty street light, but he didn’t.

Instead, he nodded, because she was good and kind and wonderful.

And she made him want to try to be, too.

#perrie styles #aot fic #aot oc #snk fic #snk oc #snk au #aot au #levi x oc #oc x canon