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thankskenpenders · 14 days

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The Knuckles show

The announcement of a live action Knuckles streaming miniseries was surprising, to say the least. I mean, what would such a show even be about in a version of the Sonic universe with no Angel Island and barely any characters from the games around? Is he gonna go treasure hunting with the gang from Montana or something? Would a streaming miniseries have the CGI budget to squeeze in any new game characters, even briefly? Rouge? Amy? At least one member of Team Chaotix? Anyone?

Now the show is finally out, and it turns out what they actually made was a comedy show about bumbling deputy sheriff Wade Whipple, the minor comic relief character played by Adam Pally who you might not even remember all that well from the first two movies, with Knuckles as his sidekick. While, yes, Knuckles does get a decent amount of screentime and opportunities to punch bad guys and do cool moves from the games, large stretches of this show focus on Wade's personal life, to the point that a couple times I almost forgot I was watching a Sonic-related show. If you're judging it purely by the metric of how well it adapts and engages with its source material, this surely must be one of the worst adaptations the Sonic franchise has ever seen.

So then, despite some huge complaints... why do I kinda like it?

(This will contain full spoilers for the Knuckles show.)

A brief summary of what the show is actually about because I know half of you aren't going to watch it

The show picks up not too long after the end of the second movie. Knuckles is now living in Montana with Sonic, Tails, and the Wachowskis out of a sense of debt to them, though he doesn't really see it as his home. He doesn't feel like he belongs on Earth, and his life currently lacks direction. After communing with the ghost of Pachacamac, though, Knuckles is instructed to keep his culture alive by teaching "the ways of the echidna warrior" to a new apprentice: deputy sheriff Wade Whipple, who's currently more concerned about winning a bowling tournament in Reno than anything else.

Things are complicated by the interference of two rogue GUN agents - Agent Willoughby, played by Ellie Taylor in a bad wig, and Agent Mason, played by Kid Cudi. (Yes, the artist behind the second movie's credits song is one of the bad guys in this.) They want to steal Knuckles' power and sell it to a former associate of Robotnik's played by Rory McCann (The Hound from Game of Thrones), who now works as a black market arms dealer. Yes, they're still doing the thing where Sonic and friends' quills radiate some kind of super-energy that the bad guys all want. No, I don't particularly love this element of the Paramount Sonic continuity. Anyway, they go after Knuckles and Wade, complicating their straightforward road trip to Reno. Antics ensue.

The Wade show

So here's the thing. While the first episode focuses largely on Knuckles, the entire rest of the show is very much the story of Wade, and by extension the other original human characters invented for this miniseries.

Episode 2 is about Wade having to rescue Knuckles from captivity after the GUN agents get him. Knuckles spends most of the episode in a cage.

Episode 3 is about introducing Wade's Jewish family, including his slightly overbearing mother and weird sister, so that Knuckles can learn about their family traditions and have Shabbat dinner with them (and then save them from bounty hunters that the GUN agents hired).

Episode 4 only features Knuckles at the very beginning and very end of the episode, probably for less than a minute total. Wade is captured by a bounty hunter he personally knows, and Knuckles decides to let that be a trial for Wade to overcome on his own.

The last two episodes feature the climactic showdowns with the GUN agents and their arms-dealing ally, who comes in with a mech for the obligatory final boss fight. You'd think this would be Knuckles' time to shine, but really, these episodes are mostly about the bowling tournament in Reno where Wade encounters his estranged father, wrapping up his own personal arc. While Knuckles does get some fights, a lot of the finale is spent on lengthy bowling scenes where Knuckles isn't in the room or even mentioned. It frequently feels more like a spiritual successor to '00s sports comedy movies like Dodgeball, Talladega Nights, or Blades of Glory than it does a part of the Sonic franchise, and the presence of ESPN 8: The Ocho commentary in the finale only drives those Dodgeball comparisons home. They get so immersed in the bowling stuff that it's genuinely hilarious when the show suddenly pivots and remembers "oh shit we still need to do the final boss fight"

Throughout all this, Wade is the protagonist. He's the character we spend more time with, he's the character who drives most of the major events, he's the character who gets more of an arc. The emotional core is Wade's journey. Knuckles is still present - sometimes, at least - but he's there as Wade's wingman, and also just as the excuse for there to be some fight scenes.

How much Sonic stuff is actually in this show?

Honestly? Not much.

Sonic and Tails are only in the first episode. Sonic gets some good scenes, but Tails gets a grand total of five lines. I counted. Unsurprisingly, Jim Carrey is absent as Robotnik, though he does get mentioned a fair bit. (For that matter, basically the entire established human cast beyond Wade is absent, even including Tom, though Maddie is there in episode one.)

GUN is involved in the story, which helps it feel slightly more connected to Sonic, but it kind of feels like it's GUN in name only. They don't use any recognizable GUN tech, and they don't call in the military. It's just two agents in suits. They might as well be the Men in Black.

The Master Emerald is mentioned as something Knuckles has to guard, but it's never seen. Angel Island is pictured as a drawing during the show's intro, appearing exactly how it does in Sonic 3, but it's never referenced at all beyond that.

I guess the climax taking place in and around a Reno casino is a reference to Sonic's many casino-themed levels. That's something. I'll give them that.

Oh, and if you're wondering if this is the point where we finally start to get actual music from the games: no, it's not. The soundtrack consists of a lot of '80s needle drops, many of which are generic Hollywood picks like "Holding Out for a Hero" for the billionth time, thought it at least has some slightly less obvious picks than the Mario movie. The theme song is '80s rock song "The Warrior" by Scandal. You'll hear it many times. You'll hear the Adventure era Knuckles raps zero times in this. You'll briefly hear classic A Tribe Called Quest song "Can I Kick It?" before Knuckles takes the question too literally and breaks the radio in Wade's car.

Beyond a handful of surface level references for nerds (one of which is admittedly wild - we'll get to that), this is probably the least an officially licensed adaptation of Sonic the Hedgehog has ever tried to actually engage with its source material. I struggle to think of another Sonic adaptation that has less to do with Sonic. For as much shit as I and countless others have given Penders for seemingly ignoring the content of the games in favor of building his own convoluted mythos, his Knuckles comics honestly included way more elements from the games than this show does.

Somehow, the one new(-ish) Sonic character introduced in this is the ghost of Pachacamac of all characters. Not even Tikal! Pachacamac! A very minor character nobody has particularly strong feelings about! You can't even use the excuse that they already had the character model, because they completely redesigned him compared to his cameo in the first movie to better match his Sonic Adventure design. And he's voiced by Christopher Lloyd! Honestly, so many of his lines are strained that it sounds like he's on death's door here, but then he'll surprise you with a more casual line like "just do it, man" and it catches me so off guard that I can't help but laugh.

Pachacamac here has basically nothing to do with the game character he takes his name and appearance from. Where the game character was a cruel warlord who kicked off a 3000 year cycle of violence, Paramount Pachacamac is now just this chill old man who gives Knuckles (and later Wade) advice in two episodes of the show. Hell, he also feels completely disconnected from his established role in the movies, where he's literally the guy who shot Longclaw. The show will not grapple with this contradiction at all. He's just here to be a thing fans like me will recognize from the games. Again, if that's all they wanted, it's kind of baffling that they didn't just use Tikal.

I don't love Knuckles in this

But what about Knuckles himself? Well, he doesn't feel all that much like Knuckles to me. Ironically, he sometimes feels like one of the weaker elements in his own show.

Back when the second movie came out, I noted that Knuckles' characterization seemed to be pulling heavily from MCU Thor as a gallant warrior from an archaic alien culture who doesn't really understand modern day Earth stuff. That worked for me in that movie. It was just there for spice. Just a little extra flavor for the character in what was otherwise a very faithful adaptation of Knuckles' storyline in Sonic 3 & Knuckles. Without those familiar elements grounding him and with a much higher reliance on comedy, Idris Elba's Knuckles becomes a pretty one-note character in this.

In damn near every scene with Knuckles, he's going to say something about being a proud, honorable echidna warrior, or brag about his glorious feats of strength, or be confused about some Earth thing and call it sorcery, or act like every other character is also a member of some noble warrior clan. He still has his moments for sure, but this schtick kinda gets old fast, and it just doesn't feel like Knuckles to me. His entire character feels derived from the scene in the diner where Thor smashes the cup on the ground and goes "Another!" Sure, I can picture game Knuckles smashing a radio to turn it off and being a little too gung-ho about busting holes through walls. That's Knuckles behavior. But building a barbarian combat pit in the living room so the Wachowski family dog can fight the mailman? Nope. That's some other guy now. It really does just feel like them taking a broad character archetype from something popular that kinda sorta fits Knuckles and just running with that, rather than trying to actually adapt the character.

Oh, but don't worry, he wears the OVA hat for like two minutes! AND he loves grapes! See, Sonic nerds? We read the wiki! That's his favorite food! Grapes! This is gonna come up like five times!

Knuckles kind of gets an arc here, but not as much as Wade does. I think the stuff about him starting to feel at home on Earth thanks to Wade's mom and the way he connects with their Jewish family traditions is oddly sweet. This arc is kind of let down, though, by the fact that Knuckles' heritage is treated as a complete joke. He's a cartoonish pastiche of various historical warrior cultures stuck together in a blender and used mostly for comedic effect. When Pachacamac's ghost appears, he's reading a newspaper and bemoaning the fact that the Mets lost again. This is not the place for a serious examination of Knuckles' feelings on being the last of his kind.

This is far from the only time the show undercuts itself with its jokes and attempts at self-parody. In the first episode, for instance, Knuckles clashes with GUN Agent Mason and his tech-enhanced punches, leading to an extremely on-the-nose inversion of the "Do I look like I need your power?" scene showcased in the trailer for the second movie. Except this time, Agent Willoughby butts in and points out how stupid that line is in this new context, since they're literally trying to steal Knuckles' power. The fight can't just be cool, they have to get cute with it. A lot of stuff like that happens in this show.

Given all these complaints, the first two episodes left me thinking I'd be fairly negative on this show overall. This seemed like the version of the show from the fandom's collective nightmares, one that undoes all of the progress the movie series seemed to have been making towards faithfulness to the games. Like, just look at these cast posters. Is this what you want out of Sonic? Do these excite you?

But then, something strange happened. Over time, I just kind of let the jokes and shenanigans wash over me and basked in how fucking weird this show is.

And I started to actually enjoy it.

Look. The Wade & Knuckles Show was never going to be peak Sonic. But that sure as hell doesn't mean it can't be entertaining.

This show is so fucking goofy

Here's the thing.

The show is funny.

Unlike a lot of other people, I didn't hate all the wedding stuff in Hawaii in Sonic 2, because I thought a lot of it was funny, both in its actual jokes and in the ways in which they tied everything back to Sonic. Tom looking wistfully at some bodybuilders doing Top Gun shit and spraying each other with beer and being like "I wish Sonic had that" is weirdly funny. The twist that those muscle bros are all agents of the newly formed GUN, who orchestrated the wedding as an elaborate scheme to catch Sonic, is funny. Mr. Olive Garden becoming the fucking GUN Commander is VERY funny. Are any of these elements of my dream Sonic movie? No, of course not. But my dream Sonic movie was never gonna happen in live action.

The Knuckles show follows up on the comedy of the previous films by being probably the funniest live action Sonic release yet. Did every joke land for me? God no. There are some stinkers in there that made me roll my eyes. But enough of them landed that it worked out for me overall. A big part of this is the fact that they've got a good cast of actors and/or comedians here.

Adam Pally is funny as Wade, and I found myself liking him more and more as a character as the show went on. He becomes an oddly endearing loser, with some sweet moments in his personal arc that made me feel for the guy. I like Wade more than Tom now, thanks to this show. I will now be happier to see Wade in Sonic 3 than I would have been previously.

The supporting cast is frequently great, too, many of whom are playing completely cartoonish, over-the-top characters. They took a cue from how exaggerated Carrey's performance was as Robotnik and decided to just abandon all pretense that this is the real world. Stockard Channing as Wade's mom is funny, and carries some of the more sincere parts of the show. Cary Elwes as Wade's very British dad who abandoned him as a child to run off and be the world's most egotistical professional bowler is funny. Edi Patterson as Wade's sister Wanda is... well, she's kinda trying too hard, but she has her moments. The Mighty Boosh co-creator Julian Barratt(!!) as a scenery-chewing bounty hunter, who was also somehow Wade's former best friend and bowling partner, is VERY funny. I love this guy.

(Honestly, they should let more people who were on Garth Marenghi's Darkplace be in Sonic stuff. Where's Matt Berry)

This is kind of a stacked cast for a bunch of stupid side characters in a live action Knuckles show! And honestly, that just makes it funnier to me. Even when they're not funny, the fact that this exists makes it funny. They somehow convinced Paramount to give them a bunch of money to make a spiritual successor to Dodgeball about a schlubby guy who wants to beat his dad at a bowling tournament... except also Knuckles the fucking Echidna is there as his personal life coach. My life is richer for the fact that I can say that sentence. I think about all the little kids who are probably watching this show this weekend, going in expecting a show about Knuckles the Echidna and having to sit through extensive bowling scenes and lore about Wade's family, and sorry kids, but I just have to laugh. Wade isn't even on the poster! The poster is just a picture of Knuckles!! They punked those kids!!!

In a franchise where every single aspect is so carefully micromanaged these days, it feels truly special to get an adaptation this bonkers. It frequently appeals to the same part of me that enjoys the fact that there's an officially licensed Knuckles comic in which Charmy Bee's best friend (also a bee) dies of an accidental LSD overdose from a drug-laced chili dog. Or like, everything about the original 1993 Super Mario Bros. movie. Or the fact that they made seven direct-to-DVD sequels to Alpha and Omega, one of which is half a retread of the adventure from the first movie (with more annoying supporting characters in tow this time) and half a literal clip show of the first movie. The sheer absurdity of the fact that these things exist is charming to me. Except, with the Knuckles show, it has the added benefit of frequently being funny on purpose! This is why I'm not sure I'd call it "so bad it's good." Like, it's not amazing, but there were a lot of parts that I enjoyed in the exact way I was supposed to enjoy them.

Look. Here's a list of real lines of dialogue from the Sega-approved Knuckles the Echidna streaming show that they're billing as a pillar of the Paramount+ lineup, to drive this point home. Let these marinate for a minute:

"I only eat grapes, and Cool Ranch Doritos™."

"Annihilate this little girl, Wade. Crush her spirit. Humiliate her so badly her parents won't even look at her again." "Doesn't that seem like we're going a bit far?" "Not far enough."

"So is he Jewish?" "Half, I think."

"I had a friend who when he listened to Alien Ant Farm he could lift a Toyota Corolla over his head."

"I'm in dire financial straits. Due to my lawsuit against an unnamed rainforest-themed restaurant franchise, I don't have two pennies to my name."

"We're here in sunny Reno, Nevada, which is so close to Hell you can smell the sparks."

"You can't threaten me with your Jewish karate chops because I am a federal agent."

"I will say, regardless of how you feel about child abandonment - and I'm against it! - the deals at TJ Maxx can't be beat."

This is a Sonic show in which they got Paul Scheer and Rob Huebel to appear as ESPN 8: The Ocho commentators.

This is a show where Wade's mom insists upon pronouncing "Knuckles" with the throaty Hebrew "ch" sound, and declares that Knuckles is basically Jewish. Later, they watch Pretty Woman together while enjoying a nice slice of key lime pie. Knuckles comments: "I don't understand. This young streetwalker with a heart made of gold, why do the others treat her with such disdain? Is it so wrong to walk the streets?"

This is a show where the fourth episode is directed by one of the guys from The Lonely Island and features a hallucinatory low budget rock opera stage musical put on by the ghost of Pachacamac. It recounts Knuckles' life story, with Wade playing Knuckles and the "evil" Longclaw played by the bounty hunter guy who's played by the Mighty Boosh guy.

Look at this.

And also, Knuckles' singing voice is provided by Michael Bolton, which they proudly announce in the middle of the musical.

And also...

Also...???

IBLIS IS IN IT????????????

Yes, Iblis!

From Sonic '06!!

Knuckles is said to have looked for a mythical power called the "Flames of Disaster" to avenge his clan, which ended up being the power that was within him all along that lets him do fire punches yadda yadda yadda. As part of this, he apparently fought Iblis off-screen at some point, as conveyed with the giant singing papier-mâché Iblis in the musical.

...Then Iblis sings about hitting up Facebook Marketplace

How? How does any of this exist? Why reference '06 of all games? How did Iblis get into the live action Sonic movie universe before Amy and Metal Sonic? Why are they using Iblis and the term "Flames of Disaster" in such a goofy way that completely disregards their original context?

I don't know. I don't know how any of this happened. But I love it. We got a Knuckles miniseries in which Michael Bolton sings the phrase "the Flames of Disaster." The world is a beautiful place sometimes.

Some people will tell you to skip episode four. "Knuckles is barely even in it," they say. "It's dumb and pointless," they say. "They clearly just ran out of special effects budget," they say. These are people whose opinions you should disregard. The episode with the least Knuckles in it is somehow the most entertaining episode of the show. I would, in fact, go as far as to say that if you only decide to watch one episode of the Knuckles show to see what goofy bullshit they get up to, it should be this one.

I cannot be mad at this show. It's so dumb, but it completely owns the fact that it's a dumb and unnecessary spinoff. Inferiority is baked into its very DNA. It's very self-consciously redoing the premise of the first movie, but stupider. It's about The Other Cop from the movies, instead of the competent one. Instead of being into a "cooler" sport, his life revolves around professional bowling. Instead of going to Vegas, he goes to Reno. Even his tragic backstory that shaped his entire life sucks. He was abandoned by his pro bowler dad in a TJ Maxx. Not even a nicer department store. A fucking TJ Maxx. This whole show is a Dril tweet.

They put a ton of effort into making it dumb in an occasionally spectacular way. So much effort was put into that joke rock opera that fans will just write off as stupid filler. They put their whole pussies into it. This is not a poorly made show. This has better production values than half the shit made for Disney+. This was made with love. Maybe not as much love for the Sonic the Hedgehog series of video games as we'd like, but it's love nonetheless.

Maybe this show broke me and these are the ramblings of a madwoman. Maybe I'm just really nostalgic for the '90s and '00s comedy movies all the Wade stuff is modeled after. Maybe the Alan Wake fan in me just really loves it when a story pivots to a silly rock opera for no real reason. I won't discount any of these possibilities. This isn't high art. This isn't something I would recommend to anyone with zero interest in Sonic, and it also isn't going to sway Sonic fans who hate the Paramount universe. I really can't blame them for being bewildered by this show. But for a specific type of person, this is the absurd three-star Sonic-adjacent comedy miniseries of your dreams. It's a mid masterpiece.

Again, I just have to step back, realize the fact that this shouldn't exist, and smile. Sega's too afraid to do stupid bullshit with the franchise like this these days. And I can't blame them, after years of Sonic being a treated as a laughingstock. But part of me misses some of the goofy shit. No matter how much I tore some of the Archie comics apart as I was reading them for this blog, I just look back on stuff like Cal and Al or the Many Hands issues and laugh. And that same part of me looks at this show about Knuckles being the sidekick to this fucking guy, and just goes...

"We're so back."

In conclusion, I genuinely think this was a more enjoyable TV show than Sonic Prime.

I wouldn't go back and rewatch Sonic Prime anytime soon, aside from maybe, like, a couple of the Shadow-heavy episodes. Huge stretches of that show bored me to tears. The writers squandered all of that show's potential. But I would rewatch the Knuckles show, which takes a terrible premise and has a lot of fun with it, in a heartbeat. Even the bowling parts. The bowling scenes in the Knuckles show are more engaging than 70% of the fights in Sonic Prime. I am not trolling. I mean that sincerely, with all my heart. Don't @ me.

Stray observations

There is effectively zero meaningful setup for the third movie in this, unless Wade's family or the two GUN agents come back or something. Project Shadow is not mentioned in this. There is no secret post-credits scene with Gerald

The CGI in this is pretty good. Not quite on par with the movies, but pretty good. Sonic's weird forehead wrinkles are distracting in his scenes though. Please fix that

I wouldn't say I liked this as much as the second movie, which obviously gets a ton of points for, you know. The Cool Sonic Shit. But I had more fun with it than the first movie, which I still feel is a painfully generic family movie that was only saved by Tyson's redesign

"Grapes are an interesting choice for someone who doesn't use his individual fingers."

Agent Willoughby was apparently the one at GUN who had to buy the Olive Garden gift cards and set up the fake wedding. Her origin story is that she hated doing shit like that and wanted to go fight aliens

This miniseries contains another Keanu namedrop because Wade's childhood bedroom has a Speed poster on the wall. I swear, if Sonic doesn't say Shadow sounds just like Keanu...

Knuckles is familiar with Paul Blart Mall Cop

Near the end the ESPN 8: The Ocho commentators say that the 1974 Reno bowling championship was also interrupted by an extraterrestrial, and given that was exactly 50 years ago I can't write off the possibility that that was Shadow. Please for the love of god give us a sequel series after the third movie where Wade takes Shadow the Hedgehog bowling. I need this more than I need air

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leclercsluvs · 7 days

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CL16 | Already Over | smau

part 3

part 1 | part 2

an: this will include sort of cheating (not really sure what to classify it as), and for that i am going to be using pics of charles and alex, however do i see any alex hate you are blocked or something, thank you very much) fc: sabrina carpenter pairing: charles leclerc x fem!reader ib: vicious by @azulpitlane and the album 'emails i can't send' by sabrina carpenter

charles_leclerc

liked by scuderiaferrari, carlossainz55 and 1.503.666 others charles_leclerc nice weekend! i'm happy with my results, and glad to finally introduce you to my girl <3 tagged: scuderiaferrari, carlossainz55

danielricciardo mate what?

carlossainz55 i literally saw her like once

lecworld oop the tea is being spilled

pierregasly great job this weekend! (very unimpressed i find out about your relationship through insta, i'm hurt)

landonorris what's her name again?

alex_albon wow you almost cut me out

charles_leclerc sorry mate i needed to fit in carlos carlossainz55 i do look amazing in that photo

y/nswrld damn the drivers did not hold back

ricsbestglam ikrrr??? like whats going onnnn?? i need the teaaa lecs.aep riiiight?? it's a neeeed

f1wagsupdates

liked by lecslvr, sharl.aep and 693 others f1wagsupdates charles new girlfriend spotted at the race! she looks so pretty, yet we haven't been able to find out what her name is tagged: charles_leclerc

lecslvr oh my goddd she's gorgeous

leclercs.aep she looks a lot like someone i've seen around in paris. i think she goes to one of the art schools there, i think her name is alexandra or something like that

f1girl1644 we must DIG and find her! charles_lechair or maybe theres a reason charles hasn't told anyone her @ like maybe she likes that people can't stalk her account and point out every flaw

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, yourbff and 2.562.827 others yourusername give me a second to forget i ever really meant it 🫨 fast times out now! music video out in a few days. hope you enjoy it (the dark hair is just a wig, i didn't dye my hair for a mv)

y/nsworld NEW MUSICC???

y/n.aep omg totally in love with this song!

scfty/n oh so they're like over over??

lecslvr i guess 😭 charles was literally seen kissing a girl and posting her on his ig

norris.aep oh is this going to be an album? about CHARLES??

lqvey/n omg i HOPEEE

danielricciardo so proud of you!

yourusername thank uuuu

carlossainz55 very nice song!

yourusername 🥰

yourusername

liked by danielricciardo, milomanheim and 3.413.034 others yourusername feather is out now!! thank you to everyone who's supported me, and a big thanks to milo for agreeing to be the guy in the elevator 💔 anyway here's a few sneak peaks for the music video, personally my fav, out october 31st!! tagged: milomanheim

y/nsb1tch ohhh who did you blockkk?

yourfriend so you finally listened?

yourusername well i suppose someone knocked some sense into me yourbff happy to be of help 🫡 yoursister girl you should have listened from the beginning. he was BAD NEWS yourfriend we've been telling her!! yoursister did i tell how he responded when she was in that accident? yourbff uhm no??! do spill!!! yoursister TO THE GROUPCHAT yourusername oh lord....

milomanheim thanks for giving me this opportunity. never been in a music video and i did enjoy being the guy in the elevator. even if i didn't get that happy ending

yourusername we'll work together again sometime, and you'll get your happy ending 🙃

luvmilo UHMM WHAT?? okay but like he's gonna eat that role up no matter what it is

leclercssupportsystem okay but why does that guy lowkey look a bit like charles??? i fear 'guy in the elevator' and 'not happy ending' is not good LMAO did she kill him in the mv or something?

yourusername 👀

danielricciardo proud to have been an inspiration 😌

yourusername inspiration and inspiration 🤷‍♀️ sure we were texting when the idea came, but you didn't contribute much :) carlossainz55 she owned you mate danielricciardo now that's just rude :(( yourusername sorry. thanks for the amazing inspiration daniel 🫶 landonorris did you get a sneak peak of it too? maxverstappen1 only a sneak peak? i got the whole song like a week ago 🤷‍♂️ pierregasly you guys got to hear it? kevinmagnussen you guys knew about it?

lcvssjeed some of the drivers being in the comments is making my heart super happy

y/nsvfx no because same! maybe we’ll see her back in the paddock again? 👀 yourusername: wouldn’t wanna miss lando get his first win 😉 vspxcharles OMG OMG OMG SHE REPLIED

scuderiaferrari

liked by charles_leclerc, carlossainz55 and 1.329.082 others scuderiaferrari a nice 1-2 this weekend! happy to see charles on top of that podium again! tagged: charles_leclerc, carlosssainz55

charles_leclerc felt good to be back on top!

carlossainz55 such a good weekend! can't wait for more

leclerswings hes such and angel! 😇

lecsgirl so we just decided to ignore that he supposedly cheated on y/n??

leclerc16 CHARLES P1!!! congratssss

char.aeps so once he drops y/n he starts performing great again? do we think she was the reason he couldn't perform?

angelic.y/n don't you dare try and put the blame on my baby angel! char.aeps she's not so innocent tho 💀 angelic.y/n what's that supposed to mean? was she the one running around being all flirty with two people at once? didn't think so

yourusername

liked by landonorris, yourbff and 2.562.827 others yourusername vicious out now! happy i was able to perform it at coachella! such an experience!

danielricciardo wow you never fail to amaze!

maxverstappen1 is this about a certain person we all collectively don't like?

yourusername perhaps 🤭 maxverstappen1 good to know landonorris may i ask, why you have not done something about it? maxverstappen1 what do you want me to do? pierregasly push him off the track. take revenge for 2012 maxverstappen1 do not remind me of that or i'll push YOU off the track.

carlossainz55 amazing!

y/ncore the drivers being so supportive even tho it's about charles treating y/n like shit is my roman empire

lestappenlvr love how she tries and makes it seem like charles was the bad guy 🙄

y/n.vsp maybe because he was the bad guy? lestappenlvr and how would you know?? y/n.vsp i dont, but hearing these songs, idk i dont think we should jump to any conclusions since we don't have the full story, but we all saw charles running around with that "alexandra" girl while he was definitely still with y/n lestappenlvr well if you dont know why are you speaking about it?? y/n.vsp y'know i could ask you the same thing.

leclercs.aep maybe she should have kept her legs closed lmao

yourusername

liked by yourfriend, yourbff and 2.562.827 others yourusername i wish we stayed just like we were up there </3

yourbff we should hang out soon!

yourusername uhm yes! yourfriend i better be invited! yourusername duh!! danielricciardo can i have an invite too? yourbff depends are you like *that guy*? danielricciardo uhh never 🫠 yourusername you can be there :))

y/nsangel aww how cute (who is she talking about?)

scfty/n probably charles? y/nsangel who? scfty/n charles_leclerc they used to date a little while ago, but it's suspected he cheated on her

scfty/n literally in love with her

y/nswrld who isnt?

scuderiaferrari

liked by charles_leclerc, leclercsbae and 729.362 others scuderiaferrari hoping for another 1-2 finish this weekend! tagged: charles_leclerc, carlossainz55

leclercsbae charles looks so gooooood!!

charles_leclerc definitely going to try!!

carlossainz55 better hope for a P2, i’m going for that top step 💪 charles_leclerc keep dreaming mate, i’m taking that P1 yourusername oh so you do know how to reply?? angelic.y/n oop the tea clfan girl what are you doing here? you're not with him anymore y/n.video they might not be, but her and carlos seems to be friends, so it makes sense shes still following ferrari chili55 i’ve never seen them interact? luvy/n he’s been really supportive of her music, commenting on her post and using her songs on his story

maxv3rs1appen_ i doubt it. with max and red bull being strong you should be lucky to get P3

norris.vfx nahhh lando is gonna get his win this weekend (let me be delulu i need it)

yourusername we're rooting for him 💪

yourusername

liked by charles_leclerc, yourbff and 3.927.175 others yourusername thank you to everyone who's been with me through this journey. i'm happy to finally be back on tour, emails i can't send has been out for a few days, i hope you like this album i've been working on. i will not be naming any names, but if a song is about you, you probably know 😉

yourbff SO HAPPY YOU'RE BACKKK (i better get tickets>:(!!)

yourusername i guess you'll have to buy them then 🤷‍♀️

video.y/n okay so i went to one of the first concerts of the tour AND SOME OF THE DRIVERS WERE THERE 🥹

angelic.y/n waittt you have to tell which ones!! video.y/n well carlos, daniel, lando, pierre, max, oscar, george, lewis, kevin, alex and logan all stood together (so i assume they went together???) leclercsluv no way!! i went to! i actually saw a certain charles in the crowd and i was pretty shocked

danielricciardo one of the best concerts i've been to

maxverstappen1 usually i don't go to concerts, but i'd go to y/n's again in a heartbeat danielricciardo ofc you would ;) landonorris now what is that supposed to mean daniel??? 🤨 danielricciardo 🤐 yourusername thank you all for being there 🥰 it meant a lot to me 🫶 danielricciardo especially max 👀 alex_albon daniel behave 😑

lecslover charles lurking in the likes???

charles_leclerc i truly am sorry for what i did. do you think you'd ever be able to forgive me?

youbff no. yourfriend no. yoursister no. danielricciardo no. yourusername maybe with time. not right now tho. go take care of your new girl. you'll know when i'm ready.

okay so i'm actually a little sad that this is over. i really enjoyed writing this and making it. i'm sure i'll do something like it again at one point. if you have any requests for what you'd like for me to maybe do then don't hesitate to lmk! <3

part 4

tags: @exotic-iris13 @callsignwidow

#f1 x reader #charles leclerc x reader #formula 1 x you #formula 1 x y/n #formula one x you #f1 x you #f1 x female reader #f1 x y/n #formula 1 smau #f1 smau #formula one smau

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thebestandrealestever · 9 months

Text

more headcannons .

a/n : ion feel like doing warns or sums so js read and find out it ain nun dat bad femblack reader coded as always . i’m so burnt out idk why but anyways, hey mooties iloveu 🤫😉.

miles is a lame nigga who has absolutely zero game or experience so when y’all started talking he is WHIPPPEEEEEDDDDDD. wanting to do everything right. so surprisingly enough he went to his dad for on how to ask u to be his gfn, he admires the love his parents have.

u are a supermodel in his eyes, u do a ec like dancing or play an instrument? he thinks ur the best at it, he thinks ur the prettiest and coolest girl in the entire world, he thinks ur the smartest and really the only girl for him, this boy really loves his gfn.

miles is always looking out for u, makes sure the doors are locked, closes ur tabs and puts your phone on the charger, turns your tv off, ect. he just wants to make sure your straight

when he liked you he was always trying to impress you, it was short lived when you told him that you loved his personality.

he stole a watch for you so you could connect with his friends

you were miles realization that he needs to and is capable of making connects in his own dimension as miles, not spiderman . he usually gets sensitive thinking about how much you opened his eyes and made him feel heard in his own world.

it’s truly all about the little things with him, rubbing your hand with his thumb, waited on third date to kiss you for first time, asked some of your friends about things you liked, draws you everywhere always, sending you voice messages instead of text. and the fact he doesn’t understand why that’s such a big deal for u drives u insane.

didn’t know how to deal with your period at first so he asked his mom, he went out and bought your favorite everything.

thinks he’s the funniest nigga ever when he puts on your lashes and wigs

looks at your highlight’s at least twice a day because ur beautiful

can’t go to sleep mad at you or have you mad at him, if you guys argued he would be there with food and a million kisses to make up for lost contact then have a conversation about whatever the situation was. one time the argument was so bad you didn’t talk for 3 days “hey ma, i got chick-fil-a” he said while taking his coat off and putting the food down while trying to eye you out in the complete darkness, you just looked at him still upset. “i’m sorry (name), i shouldn’t have said that or raised my voice.” he sighed turning on your lamp to look at you. “i’m sorry too, i shouldn’t have talked to you like that. i missed you miles, we don’t go days without talking to each other” you said pulling him into a big hug, he rubbed your back and kissed your head. “i know, i’m sorry baby. let’s talk about instead of yelling at each other from now on okay? i don’t think i could do this again.”

loveeeessss it when u give him messages or shower with him (NOT LIKE THAT.) after a long ass day of being spiderman.

thought he was gonna die when you went on vacation.

when you’re stressed or he’s stressed you guys go on the highest roof he can find and just talk to eachother.

wants to be held like a baby in your arms burying his face in the crook of your neck laying his weight on you.

squeezed your hand so hard you couldn’t feel it after when he got his ears pierced and lemme tell u it looked so good.

rubs your feet and legs while you tell him about whatever problems you had.

willingly risk his phone blowing up to be on the phone with u while u sleep

okkkkk byeeee

#miles morales #across the spiderverse #black reader #miles morales x reader #black fem reader #earth 1610 miles morales x you #earth 1610 miles fluff #miles morales fluff #miles morales 1610

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ckret2 · 5 months

Text

Chapter 31 of human Bill grudgingly enduring being the Pines' prisoner because the Henchmaniacs won't take his call: Summerween night! Everyone gets ridiculous costumes!

The Summerween Trickster's buddies are attempting to resurrect him. Robbie's making a music video. Bill's attempting to woo Ford back into friendship, to terrify Dipper with cursed knowledge, and to recover his dignity from THE most gentle chastising imaginable, and he only succeeds in 1 out of 3 of these endeavors:

It's not this one. He's just gotta process these emotions while wearing that stupid wig.

####

Soos was putting the final touches on his cosplay (the suave and mysterious Masked Guy In A Suit, love interest of the heroine from the classic anime Teenage Planetary Soldier Girls) when he heard the phone ring in the office. "Hold on, I'll get it!" He hurried downstairs, ducked under a construction paper chain Mabel had strung over the door, picked up the phone, and said, "Hello?"

A mysterious voice droned, "The sun sets a deep blood red."

"Oh, no thanks, we don't want any." Soos hung up, sighed happily, and said, "Ah, Summerween. Always brings out the weirdos."

"Hey Soos!" Mabel ducked into the doorway. "Where's the candy bowl?"

"Oh, hey Hambone. It's in my bedroom." He put on a stage whisper. "I put it in there so Bill couldn't steal it."

"Thanks Soos!" She ran upstairs.

Dipper and Bill waited downstairs, the tension thick between them (on Dipper's side, anyway; Bill—watching a black-and-white horror movie, sipping at a can of cider, and brooding over going to voicemail—didn't notice). Dipper was waiting by the door in a folding chair; but he kept glancing toward Bill in the living room. When the silence got too much to bear, he asked, "Okay, what are you dressed as?"

Bill was wearing a brown bedsheet toga (the most historically-accurate part of his costume); a cheap wig of a teased mullet that had ended up mostly red with yellow streaks, forming a plume of hair right over his head and then a long straight tail he'd draped over his shoulder; and a bunch of paper faux-Greek homes taped all around the hem of his toga, forming a ring around his calves.

"And are those my sandals?" Dipper asked.

"Take it up with Mabel, she loaned them on your behalf," Bill said. "I'm not telling my costume. You have to guess it."

"Seriously?" Dipper sighed. It had to be a god, gods towered over their mortals' temples. What god would wear brown? "I don't know—Demeter?"

"What? No. Do I seem like the Demeter type? Pathetic." Bill waved off his guess. As Mabel ran downstairs, Bill said, "Hey, Shooting Star, you haven't made your official guess yet."

Without hesitation, Mabel said, "A time-traveling hair metal singer touring the Roman Empire and trying to find a way home before his hair dye runs out."

"Wrong, but I would love to live in the world you've dreamed up." He meandered into the entryway to join Mabel as she plopped down in the second chair by the door.

Dipper screwed up his face. "Are you helping us answer the door?"

"No, you're helping me answer the door. I'm cursed, remember?" Bill leaned over Mabel's shoulder, dug into the candy bowl, and popped a lollipop in his mouth. "But you're not getting rid of me, if that's what you're asking."

Soos headed to the door, cape billowing dramatically behind him. "Hey dudes. Hey Bill." He paused in the door, studying Bill. "Hey! Is that a Bobo the Uncouth Berserker cosplay?"

Bill blinked. "Who?"

"Bobo the Uncouth Berserker! You've gotta read Bobo. He's this primitive hero descended from lost Lemuria who goes on daring adventures through the lush impenetrable jungles of Central Europe. He's got this comic that was so popular it spawned an anime, which got an American movie adaptation, which formed the basis of a second comic continuity that isn't as critically acclaimed as the original but has drawn in a lot of new fans... and..." Soos petered out. "You're not Bobo, are you."

Bill shook his head. "Thanks for playing."

"Aw." Soos's shoulders slumped. "Anyway—me and Melody are gonna be at the cosplay contest at the theater. I'll keep my phone on in case of monsters."

"We'll be fine!" Mabel said. "Go have fun!"

"You too!" With a dramatic flourish of his cape, Soos disappeared into the night.

Bill watched Soos go enviously. He could have been given a human body that looked that good in a suit and top hat, but was he? No. It wasn't fair. And Soos didn't even wear the right hat size.

Dipper glanced sideways at Bill. "Hey. Is... Lemuria real?"

"Not anymore." Bill perked up as Stan passed by, dressed like Frankenstein's monster. "Hey, Stanley! You haven't guessed yet. What am I?"

Stan surveyed him. "White columned buildings, Statue of Liberty dress, and a red clown wig. I dunno, the American government?"

Bill squawked in laughter. "That's my favorite wrong answer so far. I like you, Stanley." He fished a chocolate bar out of the bowl and held it out.

Stan grunted in disapproval, but accepted the candy. "If any of you need me, I'm gonna be up on the roof, terrifying kids." He held up a boombox and a cassette that said "Spooky Sound Effects of Halloween". "If you hear screaming children, don't worry: that means I'm winning."

"Where's your brother?" Bill asked.

"Avoiding you." Stan passed through the living room and left.

Bill's shoulders slumped; but he just dug into the candy bowl for more chocolate. Then the first trick-or-treater knocked on the door, and Dipper jumped up in relief to answer it.

The shack didn't attract quite as many trick-or-treaters as the houses closer to the center of town, but they got a steady stream of children, and more than they'd gotten the year before. Between visitors, Bill dug into their candy stock, gleefully ignoring Dipper's complaints. After the fourth or fifth visitor, Dipper and Mabel realized that Bill was covering up the amount of candy he'd pilfered by meticulously re-folding the empty wrappers and putting them back in the bowl.

"It's fair play," Bill said. He untwisted one end of a Twisty Roll tube, squeezed out the candy, blew into the wrapper to re-inflate it, and twisted the end shut again. "The kids are trick-or-treating, right? Sometimes they get treats and sometimes they get tricks."

"Come on, seriously?" Dipper said. "Even for you this is low. You're literally taking candy from babies."

"The babies are trying to take candy from us. I have no sympathy." With the precision of an origami master, Bill refolded a paper fruit chew wrapper into a box and dropped it back into the bowl.

"They're supposed to take candy from us, that's how the holiday works." Dipper looked at Mabel for support.

But she was holding up an empty 3 Fencers wrapper and squeezing it lightly between her fingers. "Wow. How did you make the wrapper puffy again? It's so convincing."

Bill shot Dipper a nasty smile, then turned to Mabel and said magnanimously, "I'll teach you everything I know." He twirled a glue stick between his fingers.

Another trick-or-treater knocked, and Dipper answered.

"Trick or treat! Please give us the worst candy you have."

Mabel blinked, leaning around Dipper to see who was outside. "Wait, what?"

Outside stood a purple-furred monster with a dozen limbs from a dozen different creatures. He gasped in surprise. "Ohhh, twin costumes! That's so cute! What are you two, haunted dolls?"

Dipper took a surprised step back. "Limby Jimmy?"

The monster was silent a moment, taken aback. He took off a bear mask he'd made out of a paper plate. "Is it that obvious?"

Mabel asked, "Have we...?"

Dipper said, "Oh! Sorry—Mabel, this is Limby Jimmy, I ran into him last year in the Crawlspace under town when I was trying to get your face back—"

Helpfully, Bill threw in, "He's Gravity Falls' most accomplished arms dealer. And legs dealer, and tails dealer, and ears dealer..."

"Limby, this is my sister Mabel. Actually, I don't know if I ever introduced myself—"

Limby Jimmy cut in, "Ohhh, yeah, I remember you! You're Troll Boy, right?"

Dipper winced. "It's—it's Dipper, actually." He paused. "Wow. We meet a lot of weird people."

"Nice to meet you, Jimmy!" Mabel held out a hand. After a moment of thought, Jimmy elected to shake it with a tentacle and a dog's paw.

"What are you doing up here?" Dipper asked. "Is Summerween the one night of the year that Gravity Falls' monsters can walk among humans without fear?"

"Oh no, I'm terrified. I wouldn't be out here if I wasn't collecting donations," Jimmy said.

"Donations?"

Jimmy hesitated, then lowered his voice. "You've been in the Crawlspace, so, you and your sister are cool, but is the lady...?" He wiggled a hoof toward Bill.

Coolly, Bill said, "I'm actually an ancient interdimensional energy being cursed to wear a human form."

Dipper and Mabel flinched in alarm and rounded on Bill, hissing, "Bill!" "Shhh!"

Ignoring them, Bill said, "So, continue."

"Oh," Jimmy said brightly. "That's all right then, yuk yuk." He wiggled his multitude of right arms. "I don't know if you humans have heard yet, but the Summerween Trickster got eaten to death last summer! It's really sad!"

Dipper and Mabel, who had watched as he was eaten to death, stayed quiet.

"But probably happy for him?" Jimmy mused. "Since I think that's what he wanted? But it's sad for the rest of his poker group, we all miss him! So I'm out here with Doug—"

"Who?" Dipper asked, looking around the porch for a second monster.

"Oh, he's back there." Jimmy pointed toward a tree at the edge of the clearing around the Mystery Shack. The tree chittered unnervingly. "We're going around collecting donations to resurrect the Trickster! Or... re-summon him? Or however this works. We never really asked him how he came to exist, it seemed rude."

"Naturally," Bill said. "You can't just ask a freak what made him so freaky. It's a sensitive topic."

"Right! You understand," Jimmy said. "Anyway, we need a lot of crappy candy!" He looked at their bowl. "Which pieces have the kids been ignoring this year?"

Mabel had started bouncing on the balls of her dusty Victorian ghost shoes; and the moment she had a turn to speak, she squealed in excitement. "You're the Summerween Trickster's friend! That's perfect! Stay here, I'll be right back!" She shoved the candy bowl into Bill's arms and zoomed up the stairs. "I've got some stuff for him!"

Bill looked at the bowl, looked at the stairs, shoved the candy in Dipper's arms, and followed Mabel. "Hey, Shooting Star? What are you doing?"

Her voice drifted down the stairs: "Getting a donation! I'll be just a minute!"

"Hold on, you're actually helping that guy?" Bill laughed. "Why?" He climbed high enough to poke his head above the attic floor and lowered his voice so Jimmy couldn't hear. "I wasn't paying that much attention last Summerween, but I got the impression from your little costume store brawl that the Trickster was trying to kill you kids. Am I missing something?"

"I mean, yeah, he was—but he was in a really bad place back then, that doesn't mean he deserves to be dead for it. And now he knows someone out there wants to eat him, so maybe he'll be less insecure and evil." Mabel laughed, "Anyway, the Trickster isn't that bad! He didn't try to kill me half as hard as you did!"

Bill froze a couple of steps from the top of the stairs. He didn't move for a few seconds; and then wordlessly, he slunk back downstairs.

Dipper watched as Bill, face beet red, trudged into the living room. "Hey. What's Mabel...?"

"How should I know." Bill curled up on the couch, picked up the can of cider he'd been drinking earlier, shotgunned it, and glowered at the horror movie on TV.

Dipper considered Bill—all alone in the living room and not doing anything important—and considered Mabel, upstairs; and said, "Hey, Jimmy. Do you mind waiting out here until Mabel gets back."

"Sure! I don't have any plans." Jimmy rocked back on his many heels.

"Cool. Thanks." Dipper shut the door.

He sidled oh so very casually into the living room and leaned against the TV. "Guess it's just the two of us right now."

Bill's gaze didn't waver from the TV. "Terrific counting skills, Troll Boy." He popped open another cider can.

Dipper grit his teeth. Let it go. "Sooo! You're from the second dimension, huh? What's that like?" (His voice cracked embarrassingly on "that.") "Just—just curious. Making friendly conversation. Caaasual conversation." He flashed a pair of finger guns at Bill, to underscore just how casual he was. "Yyyep." Witness the junior paranormal investigator in action.

Bill turned the cold, empty eyes of a killer on Dipper. He took a long, slow sip from his cider. And he asked himself: what can I say that will make this stupid boy regret ever daring to speak to me?

Bill smiled. "Yeah. Sure. Okay," he said. "You wanna know what it's like? Have you ever read the Allegory of the Cave?"

Dipper hesitated. "By... Plato?"

"That one. You know—ignorance is like being a prisoner chained in a cave, watching shadow puppets being cast on a wall, and thinking they're reality; and having knowledge is like being outside the cave in the sunlight, seeing the real shapes that are casting the shadows—"

"I have read it, actually," Dipper said, a tad defensively. "It was for extra credit in—"

"English class, I know."

Dipper frowned; but he soldiered on. "So... living in the second dimension is like being chained in a cave, staring at the shadows on the wall, and thinking that's reality? Bleak."

Bill laughed so loudly that Dipper started. "Wow, you're so dumb! Use your brain, kid: it's the second dimension. You're not the prisoner: you're the shadow on the wall." Bill's lip curled in a sneer, "An illusion in somebody else's allegory. And the only one who can see the cave's exit... is you. That's what the second dimension is like!" He laughed again. It sounded forced.

"Oh," Dipper mumbled. He tried to wrap his head around the idea of being a living metaphor for ignorance. "Sounds... pretty bad?"

"Awful," Bill agreed. "Doesn't hold a candle to what your dimension has going on, though."

"Wh... why, what's going on in the third dimension?"

Bill gave him a malicious smile, and Dipper had the sinking feeling he'd just walked into an obvious trap. "You idiot, you still think you're in the third dimension? Really?"

Was that a trick question? What answer was Bill looking for? What could this be if not the third dimension? "Nnooo?"

"Wow. I can really see why you're a straight-A's honors student," Bill said. "You're so good at figuring out what answer the test wants and regurgitating it—even if you don't actually understand it at all." He heaved himself back to his feet; and Dipper was sure there was something threatening in the movement—something that reminded Dipper that he was talking to a dangerously unstable extinction level event precariously packed into an unsteady human body. "Although copying the year of the Louisiana Purchase off of Brandon's test in fifth grade probably didn't hurt, did it."

Dipper's stomach dropped. The secret shame buried beneath the foundation of his honors roll-worthy record. Pull that out and his entire academic career came toppling down. He'd get kicked out of the honors classes. He'd go to jail. Was cheating against the law? "H... how did—?"

"What year was the Louisiana Purchase?"

Dipper's brain immediately went blank. He was silent, trapped in the paralyzing intensity of Bill's gaze. After several terrifying seconds, he croaked, "1803?" and hoped he was right.

"Attaboy. Too bad you couldn't have learned that a little sooner, isn't it?" As he spoke, Bill had closed in on Dipper until he'd backed him into the corner behind the TV set, filling Dipper's exit route with one hand on the TV and the other on the wall. "But we were talking about dimensions, weren't we! Whaddaya like to read, kid," Bill asked too casually, "do you like cosmic horror? Do you know what real 'cosmic horror' is?"

Dipper regretted this conversation completely.

"It's having an eyeball on the inside of your body, and seeing another dimension through it. And ohoho, I think you'd be amazed at the things I can see from here—"

Dipper got the distinct impression that if he didn't get out of this conversation, he would only hear things he'd be telling his therapist about for months. "Cool! Good talk, man. Hey Mabel?" (That was an absolutely humiliating voice crack.) "How's it going?"

A pause. "I think I need help!"

"Coming!" Dipper ran behind the TV to escape Bill and gratefully bolted upstairs.

The kid had caved so fast. And Bill had only just been getting started. He smirked, sat, and turned back to the movie.

A moment later, Mabel and Dipper came back downstairs, carrying four bulging plastic grocery bags. Mabel set one by her feet, opened the door, and shoved the first bag into Jimmy's arms. "Here! You can give these to the Trickster!" She shoved over the second bag.

Jimmy stumbled back under the weight. "Whoa there! What is this?"

"Candy chalk-hearts! I completely bought out the leftovers after Valentine's Day," Mabel said. "I wanted to make sure that if we met the Trickster again, I could let him know he's loved and appreciated as the terrifying avatar of spooky holiday spirit that he is! And that I also respect that he's made out of gross candy nobody likes to eat." She picked up a chalk-heart box and waved it in Jimmy's face. "So here's a gross candy that expresses love! See, the little hearts say things like 'You smell nice' and 'I heart ur face,' but they taste like if dehydration was a flavor."

Dipper handed his bags to Jimmy. "Wait—Mabel, that's why you got all these? You've been planning to help the Trickster since February? I thought you were gonna build a chalk-heart house or something."

"Oooh, that's such a good idea. I should do that next year!" To Jimmy, she said, "I was gonna give these to him personally, but if he's still dead, I guess you can add it to his candy sacrifice pile or whatever? And make sure he gets this!" She handed Jimmy a store bought Shimmery Twinkleheart Valentine's card. It read, "I BELIEVE in our friendship! Happy Valentine's Day!" Mabel had scratched out "Valentine's" and written "Summerween".

Choked up, Jimmy said, "Oh—wow. That's the nicest thing anyone's done for us all night. I'm sure the Trickster will really appreciate it when he's not dead anymore."

Dipper was a little more vengeful. Dipper didn't want to do anything for one of the many guys that had tried to kill them last year. But, on the other hand, Mabel had just gone all in on this, and Jimmy seemed nice enough, so... Dipper sighed. Whatever, it was Summerween and this was a trick-or-treater. "Hey," he picked up the candy bowl. "There's really only one bag of good candy in here. The bottom of the bowl is filled with after-dinner mints our great uncle's been stealing from restaurants for the last six months. The Trickster would probably love that, right?"

"Aww—thanks so much, you guys! We'll have the poker group back together in no time!" Jimmy dug past the good candy and started scooping mints into his bag. "Oh—since I'm here, can I ask about our other poker buddy? Do either of you know Mr. What's-His-Face? He disappeared around the time you were visiting the Crawlspace, maybe one of you saw something? Any information would be helpful." Jimmy looked at them with weird, plus-shaped, but very hopeful eyes. "Between the Trickster's death and Whatsis disappearing, the local paranormal community's been hit hard. Especially us guys in their friend group. I'm—I'm not gonna lie," Jimmy heaved a sigh, "It's been a really hard year."

Dipper and Mabel, who were directly and personally at fault for Mr. What's-His-Face's disappearance and knew he was frozen in stasis in Ford's bunker at that very moment, exchanged a look and came to a silent agreement.

"Nope, don't know anything," Mabel said.

"Sorry, buddy," Dipper said.

Like the Summerween Trickster, Mr. What's-His-Face was a weird faceless shapeshifty monster that had tried to kill them. But they felt like that was where the similarities ended.

By the time of the Trickster's death, Mabel and Dipper had realized that his deepest inner longing was to be called good enough to eat. Mr. What's-His-Face's deepest inner longing was to steal innocent people's faces. If Mabel and Dipper helped resurrect the Trickster, he'd probably go back to ensuring everyone displayed sufficient holiday spirit, while hopefully mellowing out about eating people now that he'd been consumed once. On the other hand, if Mabel and Dipper helped free Mr. What's-His-Face, he'd probably just keep stealing faces.

And on top of all that, they could help resurrect the Trickster without admitting they knew the guy who ate him. They couldn't really lead Jimmy to Mr. What's-His-Face without admitting their great uncle was keeping him captive. And that would be a problem for the whole family.

"Oh," Jimmy said. "Okay, that's fine. Thanks for all your help. You know where to reach us if you hear anything."

Mabel shook her head. Dipper nodded. "Yeah, we'll let you know."

Jimmy hopped off the porch, shouted, "Hey Doug, can you help me carry these?" and chucked a couple of bags of chalk-hearts toward the tree line. Dipper and Mabel stared. Nothing emerged to pick the bags up.

They shut the door.

"Man," Dipper said. "We kinda devastated the paranormal poker group last summer, didn't we?"

"Yeah." Mabel sucked in a breath between her teeth. "Wow. Feels... kinda bad."

Dipper offered her the candy bowl. "Drown our feelings in chocolate?"

"Please."

They grabbed a piece of candy each, tore open the wrappers—and frowned. Mabel stomped a foot. "Dang it—Bill!"

"Hm?"

"How many of these wrappers are empty?!"

Bill poked his head out of the living room and said, smugly, "Like candy from a baby!"

####

A knock, and Dipper opened the door. "Wendy! Hey! Good timing—"

"Hey." Wendy lowered her voice. "Quick question—this is super important—is Goldie here?"

"Uh—yeah, why—?"

"Yello?" Bill carefully wove his way out of the living room, already less steady on his feet than when he'd sat down. "I heard my name, who's summoning me?"

Wendy pointed over the twins at Bill and turned to shout into the dark, "Ladies and gentlemen! I present to you! Live and in person... Toga Lady!"

A half dozen teenagers immediately went bananas. Hooting and hollering and cheering and whistling: "To-ga! To-ga! To-ga!"

Bill's entire face lit up. Without missing a beat, he pushed past the baffled twins out onto the porch and spread his arms wide, basking in the cheering. "That's right, keep it coming! Worship me! I'm the greatest!"

"Yes!" Robbie pumped a fist in the air. "The legends were true!" Nate immediately added, "The prophecy! The prophecy!" Tambry snapped photos of Toga Lady's fresh look as fast as her phone could save them, muttering, "Everyone's gonna flip when they find out you're still in town."

Wendy waited, grinning, until her friends' faux hysterics had died down. "Okay—okay, after getting you hyped up, I should probably say that Toga Lady is actually Toga Guy." She glanced questioningly at Bill. "I think?"

"Eh, I'm not picky."

"Anyway this is Goldie, he was stuck in another dimension for thirty years, it's crazy, and now he's like my illegal backup cashier. He actually... doesn't usually wear togas?"

Bill laughed. "If you can't wear a bedsheet on Summerween, when can you?"

Lee said, "Thompson wore a bedsheet to homecoming."

"Hey."

Bill pointed at Thompson. "A man of impeccable fashion! I like it!" Thompson gave him a look of eternal gratitude.

"And Goldie, this is the gang! That's Thompson, he's the guy with the van; Robbie and Tambry, they're like, gender-swapped versions of each other, they even share their hair dye..."

As Wendy did introductions, Mabel whispered to Dipper, "Did you know she was gonna introduce Goldie to everyone?"

"No! This is bad, I told her not to trust him..."

Bill was responding to a question, "No, no, you've gotta guess, I'm making everyone guess!"

The teens considered the question. Robbie offered first, "Punk caveman?"

"Nope!"

Hesitantly, Thompson tried, "Nero fiddling over the burning of Rome?" He winced when Lee laughed.

"I like where your head's at, but no! I can't fiddle."

"The gremlin king from Huge Maze?" Tambry said.

Mabel piped up, "No, but the wig came from a gremlin king costume and I appreciate you for recognizing that!" Tambry nodded in cool approval.

Bill dispensed of Lee, Nate, and Wendy's guesses—Greek Christmas tree, that one guy who keeps painting burning banks, and hair metal Hades—before Robbie loudly cleared his throat to cut in. "Anyway, would love to stay and chat, but we've gotta move if we wanna be in position before sunset. Dipper, Mabel, you ready?"

"Ready to ghost it up!" Mabel said, squeezing around Bill with Dipper onto the porch.

Robbie surveyed their makeup—deathly white skin, ashen grey lips, and dark circles around their eye sockets. "Yeah, that's pretty good. Could use a little color, maybe. Like bloody tears?" He turned toward Tambry.

She said, "I think I've got some red eyeliner."

"'In position'?" Bill asked, giving Dipper and Mabel a questioning look.

Wendy said, "We're helping Robbie film this music video tonight."

"We're the creepy ghost twins!" Mabel announced proudly. "We get to sing the chorus."

Robbie said, "Yeah, the song's about childhood and growing up, but like, with ghosts? Because once you've grown up, your childhood is all dead? It's metal, but introspective. I'm calling the genre 'intrometal.'" He flipped his bangs dramatically. "It's a super deep song. Metaphorical layers."

"Oh yeah?" Bill stared Robbie down. "Sing some of it."

Robbie blinked. "Oh. Yeah, okay uh, I haven't warmed up my voice but, the hook is like—" He pantomimed playing a guitar and whisper-screamed, "'BABY DOLLS! BASKET BALLS! BASKET CASE! HUMAN RACE!' Like that."

Bill nodded slowly, face expressionless. "Ah, yeah, I see. Really deep stuff. Makes you think."

"Thanks." Robbie looked at Dipper and Mabel. "Anyway, if we're gonna get any footage in the graveyard before the jack-o'-melons start burning out, we've gotta move. Let's go, Creepy Ghost Twins."

"Wait, you're going out?" Bill asked Mabel. "Like out-out? Leaving me here? By myself? On Summerween?"

"Wh—yeah, we're only handing out candy for half the night," Mabel said. "I told you that."

"No you didn't!"

"Yes I did!"

"When?"

Mabel thought. "No I didn't," she admitted. "Sorry!"

Wendy punched Bill's arm. "Sorry to steal them. We'll be back in a couple of hours," she said. "Or you could come help—?"

"No!" Dipper and Mabel both shoved Bill back into the house before he could accept. Dipper said, "You've gotta—guard the house." Mabel added, "And hand out candy!"

"Right," Bill said flatly. "Yes. That. Ha."

"See you later!" Mabel said, and then shut the door in his face.

The last thing he heard was Wendy explaining to her friends, "He's on house arrest for, like, academic plagiarism and war crimes or something..." and then they were gone.

Bill's shoulders slumped. Well, now what? He couldn't celebrate a holiday by himself. What was the point of wearing a costume if no one sees you in it. He picked up a piece of candy, discovered it was one of his decoys, and picked up another.

Someone knocked on the door.

"Yeah, yeah," Bill sighed. He picked up the candy bowl, turned toward the door, and paused. Ah. Right. What was he supposed to do with this impenetrable portal-blocking slab of wood.

Who was left in the house? Stan on the roof, Ford in the basement, Abuelita probably already in bed... were any of them worth harassing to help him answer the door? Maybe Stan, he'd gotten all dressed up, he liked the holiday even if he didn't like Bill—

The trick-or-treater knocked more insistently.

Or. Or.

He could pick up the bowl, peer out the small window in the door, and make direct eye contact with the children outside while he ate candy.

As a piece of mid-tier chocolate melted on his tongue, he saw three trick-or-treaters' faces fall as their faith in a kind, caring universe died. He grinned at them and ate another chocolate.

Oh yeah. He grabbed the rest of his cider from the living room and set up post next to the door. This would keep him entertained the rest of the night.

####

He made seven small children cry.

####

Stan watched from his post on the roof as yet another sobbing kid ran away from the shack. "HA! Gottem! Sucker!" He affectionately patted his boombox. "Creepy ghoulish laughter, you never disappoint! Terrifying moochers since 1989!" He paused the cassette and rewound it a few seconds to replay the best part.

He heard a scraping sound above him, and looked up just in time to see Ford sliding down the roof to join him. "Oh, hey! I didn't think we'd see you again tonight."

"Mabel made me promise to celebrate Summerween a little."

"Good for her!"

Stan had already claimed the sun lounger, so Ford brushed some dust and leaves off the roof's cooler and sat. "So, what are we doing? Scaring trick-or-treaters?"

"Yep. This year I'm taking a more atmospheric approach." He gestured at his boombox, which by now was playing haunting organ music. "Nothing like screaming zombies and rattling chains from nowhere to freak out the kids."

Ford nodded. "Psychological torment. I approve."

"Not quite as good as getting to see the terror in their eyes, but." Stan shrugged. "Bill was hanging out with the kids. I didn't want to put up with him."

"Mm. There's a reason I was spending the holiday in the basement."

"Heh. Well, there's always Halloween."

They were silent for a moment, listening as the cassette moved on from organ music to werewolf howls. Stan asked, "Think we'll be rid of him by then? I know we were hoping to be done with him before the Fourth of July—but since I haven't heard anything lately, I figure you hit a roadblock."

Ford winced. "Guilty as charged." He was still relearning how to keep other people in the loop. Even Stan. "You're right. I have a weapon that can destroy him, but I can't find a fuel source without restarting the portal. I'm hoping Fiddleford will come up with a solution I haven't."

Stan nodded. Ford had told him he was getting Fiddleford involved; even as reluctant as Ford was to admit how little progress he'd made, he wasn't going to tell someone outside the family about Bill without letting Stan know. "Any breakthroughs on his end?"

####

During the credits between episodes of the retired samurai period drama (most recently, the samurai had been asked to use his sword to help cut flowers for a bouquet), Fiddleford leaned over and whispered to Ford, "So I've been a-lookin' at those blueprints you left me."

"And...?"

"And I've constructicated a power adaptor. Just jimmy out the fuel tank, swap it for the adaptor's cord, and you can power that weapon by pluggin' it into the wall! It'll just drain all the power from the town for a few seconds, that's all."

"Fiddleford, that's amazing—"

"Now, hold on. There's bad news," Fiddleford said. "Try as I might, I can't quite get it to draw enough power to activate those energy-destroying features what you'd need to disintegrate Bill. It'll work like a powerful laser, but nothin' else."

Ford sighed. "It's a starting point, I suppose."

"I'll send you home with the adaptor anyway. Never know when you'll need a big laser."

"Very true. Do you have any promising leads on other alternative fuels?"

Fiddleford shook his head. "It's the NowUSeeitNowUDontium or nothing. But I've got a hunch we could synthesize it under lab conditions. I'll letcha know in a few days."

And then the next episode started, and they dropped the conversation.

####

Ford let out a heavy sigh. "He's only had a partial success so far. But I'm hopeful he's on the right track."

"So, if he's working on this weapon, what are you doing?"

"Waiting, mostly. I don't know what else I can do."

Stan frowned. "What—that's it? You've been downstairs all day every day—if you're not figuring out how to destroy him, what are you doing?"

"Passing time somewhere I can be on call if he gets up to something—but I don't have to look at him," Ford said wryly. "And—as long as I'm waiting to hear back from Fiddleford, I've been... picking apart that list of spells Bill gave me. To see if any of them are tricks or traps."

Stan couldn't say he was surprised. That was his workaholic brother. A pamphlet of demon magic was like catnip to him. If anything, Stan was almost glad Ford had that letter to distract him. Over the past year...

Well, Ford was fine on land—when he temporarily had a mystery to solve, an adventure to pursue, an anomaly to study, a distraction to fill his time—but at sea, when his mind was unoccupied, he was listless. He had books he didn't read, field notes he didn't enter into his journal, games he didn't play. He fed himself and exercised and did chores around the ship like a robot programmed to take care of itself, and he stared out at the sea.

Last summer, Ford hadn't seemed happy but he'd seemed alive. Tired and angry, but alive. But after Weirdmageddon, a light in his eyes went out. Stan didn't know if it was the end of summer, or guilt over the memory gun, or the gap between finishing a thirty-year-long quest and discovering the next one. All Stan knew was the light hadn't come back on until the moment Bill Cipher, clad in a new body and a purple cartoon bedsheet, tried to cave Ford's skull in.

Ever since they were children, Ford had had a tendency to develop obsessions. It was somehow simultaneously both what made him most interesting and what made him boring. Depended on the obsession. But these all-consuming interests had always tended to last a few months, at most a year; and he'd never seemed to be without one, much less for nine months. Stan had no idea what carrying a single obsession for three decades might have done to Ford's mind.

Stan was glad something had woken Ford back up, and he worried that losing that focal point again might leave Ford permanently adrift. But another part of him worried that, this time, Ford wouldn't let the object of his obsession go. He tended to collect things related to his obsessions.

But then, he usually tended to like his obsessions. He hadn't seemed bothered to burn the contents of his creepy Bill shrine last summer. Ford wouldn't do anything stupid, Stan told himself. Ford hated Bill. "So? Were any of the spells traps?"

"Not... so far, no." Ford sounded irritated by this.

Stan shrugged. "Makes sense. He's trying to butter us up. If that idiot thinks being nice to us for a week or two is gonna make up for the years of grief he's given us—"

A loud rattle-clattering below made them both start. Stan sat bolt upright. "What the—?"

Ford inched to the edge of the dormer roof, knelt down, and leaned over the edge just far enough to see the window.

Bill's face was pressed to the glass, eye rolled up toward the roofline. He grinned in surprised delight and shouted through the glass, "HEY, STANFORD! What are you doing up here?! I thought you were downstairs!"

"Ugh." Ford turned to grimace at Stan. "Speak of the devil."

Bill pounded on the glass again. "Hey, Sixer! SIXER! Open the window!"

"Why?"

"I wanna talk!"

"No."

"Come ooon, the kids ditched me and I'm bored! There's no one in the house to talk to! The old lady's asleep and Stanley's on the roof, so—" He abruptly fell silent, squinting with deep suspicion at Ford-who-should-be-in-the-basement kneeling on the-roof-where-Stan-should-be, and said, "Wait. Are you Stanley right now? Show me your hand."

Ford did not. "Go away, Bill." He left the edge of the roof for his cooler seat.

"Get back here!" The pounding redoubled. "I don't care which Stan you are! If you don't wanna talk, I can always go wake up Dolores!"

Ford looked at Stan. "Mrs. Ramirez's name is Dolores?" He had gotten used to everyone calling her Abuelita.

Stan stomped on the roof, "Shaddup!"

Bill did not shaddup. "Come ooon!"

Stan sighed in defeat and heaved himself to his feet. "If he keeps that racket up he's gonna break that window, never mind that hex you put on him." When they'd taken out the original Bill-shaped window, Stan had replaced it with the cheapest window he could find. He didn't think it was very durable. "How much trouble can he get in with one open window twenty feet above the ground and both of us watching him?"

Ford Frowned.

"Don't gimme that look. Do you want to pay for a broken window?" Stan flipped through his keys for his key-shaped emergency lock pick, leaned over the edge of the roof, and wedged the pick into the window frame. The latch popped open. Lucky this window was so cheap, that wouldn't have worked on one with deluxe features like "airtight weatherstripping" or "a properly-fitting frame." Stan swung open the window. "Okay, you have our attention. Now what's the fastest way we can get rid of you?"

Bill clumsily climbed out to sit on the windowsill with his legs in the shack, and leaned back so he could see up onto the roof. "Hiya Fo—" He lost his balance, flailed, and yelped as he toppled backwards.

Stan and Ford lunged forward to seize an arm each. Stan snapped, "What are you doing, you maniac?!"

Bill stared up at them both in wide-eyed amazement. "You do like me."

Stan made a noise of disgust, let go, and wiped his hands on his pants like Bill had cooties.

Ford said, "We like you trapped in that body and not free to cause the apocalypse."

"I heard 'we like you'!"

"Shut up." Ford managed to haul Bill back upright. (Touching Bill felt wrong—all soft flesh and skin and the suggestion of bones underneath. Even when looking right at Bill's human body, Ford still expected him to feel like heavy shadows and heatless flames.) From this close, Bill reeked of cider. "Just how much have you had to drink?"

"Not so much I won't remember whatever you say in the morning, so be nice to me!" Bill laughed. He leaned back, this time hanging by one hand off the window frame to precariously maintain his balance, and grinned up at Ford. "So! The least fun person in the house has finally emerged from his lair? And you didn't even come into the house to join in the Summerween festivities! 'All work and no play'..."

Ford had to crouch at the edge of the roof, hovering nearby in case Bill lost his balance again. "I wanted to participate in Summerween, actually. It just so happens that the last person I'd ever spend a holiday with is in the house."

"Listen, Stanford. I know you're holing up in your study for days on end just to hurt me. But let's be honest, you're hurting yourself more! When's the last time you saw the sunlight! Look at how pale you're getting, you look like a vampire."

Stiffly, Ford said, "It's costume makeup. That's my vampire costume." Stan laughed.

"It what." Bill flipped up his eyepatch and squinted blearily at Ford's face.

Wordlessly, Ford bared his teeth to show off his plastic vampire teeth.

"Oh." Somewhat deflated, Bill said, "Nice work, it's convincing."

"Thanks," Ford said grudgingly. Giving in to his curiosity, he gestured toward Bill's (somewhat disheveled) reddish-yellow wig. "What are you."

"Oh!" Bill perked back up. "You've got to see the whole thing. Hold on—" He turned around in the window, ignoring how Ford half reached for him in case he needed steadying, until he got his legs outside to dangle on the roof. "What do you think!"

Ford looked over the brown toga flared out like a cone, the eruption of red hair, the small paper city below, and said, "Mount Vesuvius and Pompeii? Very clever."

Bill's face lit up. "Finally! You're the first person all day to get it!" He smoothed out the skirt proudly, his jerky gestures just a bit more exaggerated than usual. "Do you know how long I've wanted to go to a costume party as Vesuvius? But nobody off Earth would get it! And now that I'm finally here, I can't go to parties and I'm shaped more like a mandrake than a volcano." He flung up his hands, wobbled, and caught himself before Ford had to intervene. "But at least you got it. I knew I could count on you, IQ."

He sounded so sincerely grateful. Ford regretted calling the costume clever. It was, but Bill didn't need the ego boost.

"Oh! By the by—I didn't think you'd emerge before the day was over, so I saved this." Bill fished around in his toga until he retrieved a mini pack of jelly beans. "Here!"

Ford eyed the pack. "Why is it open?"

"Because you only like the weird-shaped jelly beans, so I ate all the normal beans and saved the weird ones in one bag."

"I don't want this. You touched every one of the beans, that would be disgusting even if they weren't coming from you," Ford said. "Anyway, this is a patently transparent attempt to buy your way into my good favor—"

"It sure is, Ford, and if you don't accept it I'll get to be annoying about your ingratitude for weeks! Is that what you want? You know I'll do it. Everyone will be on my side—"

Ford sighed, but snatched the bag from Bill's hand. "Fine. Now drop it."

"That's more like it!" Bill favored Ford with an approving smile. "Anyway, it's just about the only candy left in the house, I ate everything else—hey, have you ever been cross faded on cider and a sugar rush?"

Ford was still trying to decide whether he wanted to engage in this one-sided conversation enough to ask Bill what "cross faded" meant when Bill moved on without him: "It's—not that interesting, actually. 6 out of 10. Anyway, all that's left in the bowl is mints and wrappers. And Mabel even managed to give most of the mints away—hey, she's so nice, did you know she's helping to resurrect the Summerween Trickster?"

She was doing what? "No. Why?"

"She's so nice."

"You just said that."

"What is she so nice for. What's she getting out of it," Bill asked, more to the universe at large than to Ford. "If more humans were half as nice to freaks as she is, your rotten planet wouldn't need people like you and me to save it."

Ford didn't even know where to begin with that. He looked to Stan for help.

Stan was sitting straddling his lounger, elbow on one knee and chin in his hand, watching this exchange like he was watching a weird bug on the wall try to navigate around a picture frame. At Ford's glance, he rolled his eyes and pantomimed sipping from a drink.

He could say that again. Ford cleared his throat. "Bill, maybe you should..."

"Hey," Bill said. "Great talk, we really should catch up more sometime. And pull your weight next time, I always have to do all the talking. But right now, I'm..." He gestured vaguely off to the side. "I'm gonna lie down and try not to throw up. Ciao!" He swayed as he tried to get back in the window, tumbled backward into the shack, and thudded heavily on the floor. "Ow."

Ford gingerly shut the window.

Stan turned up the boombox. "Chatty drunk, isn't he."

"He's chatty sober, too." But in front of the kids? Neither of them saw Bill as a role model, but they still didn't need to be exposed to that kind of behavior. Especially when the responsible adults were outside or asleep... "Did we really leave Bill alone in the house with the kids?"

"W—I—" Stan shrugged defensively. "They were all right! They can take him! They're doing karate or whatever! You didn't see how Mabel flipped him at the mall! It was like David wrestling Goliath."

"David and Goliath didn't wrestle."

"You know what I mean."

Ford supposed he didn't think Bill was any threat to the children. At least, not right now, and not physically. He felt like he'd know if Bill was about to try anything.

He looked at his open bag of gross felt-up jelly beans. Speaking of trying to butter them up... Ford wound up and chucked the bag as hard as he could.

He stared into the dark after it.

A small part of him was beginning to wonder whether this wasn't all just an attempt to get Ford's guard down. The gifts, sure, that was as clear-cut a case of bribery as you could get. Nothing ambiguous there.

But the endless chatter... Back when Ford had called Bill his Muse, this was exactly how he'd wanted Bill to talk to him. Not in the flighty half-distracted way of a friendly businessman catching up on a work project's progress before hurrying on to the next meeting; but just talking for talking's sake, talking for the company.

Getting what he once had longed for made his skin crawl. And he couldn't even tell if Bill was acting.

The boombox let out a ghastly banshee shriek. Ford and Stan both jumped, then laughed awkwardly.

Ford sat on the cooler again. "Is it just me, or... did Bill completely ignore you as soon as he realized I was up here."

"Well. I wasn't gonna mention it. I didn't wanna sound jealous of the attention. But yeah—he's been doing that since he got here. If you're in the room, he tunes everyone else out."

"I thought it was in my head." And he hadn't wanted to sound like he wanted to imagine Bill was favoring him.

"And you do the same thing around him," Stan said, and laughed at Ford's flinch of alarm. "It's—it's fine, I get it. Keep your friends close and your enemies closer, right? You've got some kind of superhero-supervillain nemesis thing."

Ford got the distinct impression that Stan was offering him a convenient excuse for the tunnel vision. He took it. "I suppose that's true." The way his jaw clenched and his shoulders tensed around Bill certainly felt like a "nemesis" reaction.

But if Stan thought Ford was a bit too preoccupied by Bill... well, maybe he was right. Once Ford had gotten over his initial wave of fear, of despair, of outrage at the injustice, at finding Bill was still alive—there was a part of him that was almost relieved. A part of him that had been on guard against nothing for the past year, twisting around looking for an absent threat. Now that it knew where the threat was, that part of him could finally settle down and watch Bill with steady, certain eyes. Having nothing to worry about made him more anxious than having one thing to always worry about.

(Maybe Shermie's kid had been on to something when he suggested Ford might benefit from therapy.)

Knowing Bill was back didn't put the old starlight and awe back in that hole Bill had left in Ford's chest. But dread could fill a hole all the same.

Ford tried to push Bill out of his mind and the conversation. "You think I'm like a superhero?"

"You run around fighting monsters with a space laser. What else would you be?"

"Huh." Well. That made his night.

"Just as long as you don't pull that 'hero spares the villain to show how good he is' shtick."

"Never." Ford laughed ruefully. "I think I left 'good' behind a few felonies back." He'd probably left "good" behind the night he accepted the portal blueprints.

"Couple stragglers," Stan said, nodding out into the dark. It took Ford a moment to spot the costumed kids and remember it was Summerween. "I recognize those costumes, I scared them off an hour ago. What are they doing back?"

Ford squinted at them. "Are those toilet paper rolls?"

"Wh—Hey! What are you little runts— Hey!" Stan leaped to his feet, shaking his fist at the kids below. "Get away from my car! Stop that! I'll have you know that's a classic— No, not the eggs!"

Ford slid out his freeze ray, turned down the power, and offered it to Stan. "Here. At this power and distance, it'll feel like getting pelted with invisible snowballs."

Stan snatched up the weapon. "Eat this, twerps!"

The Summerween night air was filled with the screams of terrified children and the evil laughter of an old man.

####

Wow. It sure sounded like everybody was having fun. Outside. Without him.

Bill was nauseous.

He stared at the spinning ceiling, flat on his back, one leg on a cushion and the rest of him on the floor.

Bill was nauseous and alone. The loneliness tore at his throat. Even Mabel had ditched him. Of course she did—he'd tried to kill her. He'd barely even remembered he'd tried to kill her until she brought it up. Had he tried to kill her? No, surely not—he liked the kid, he'd always liked her—he'd been faking to force Ford's hand, he never would have gone through with it. He would've teleported her into another room and pretended he'd disintegrated her. She didn't know he hadn't meant it. She was just mad he'd scared her. She couldn't take a joke.

But, Ford talked to him. Ford even liked his costume. It wasn't much, but it would get Bill through the night.

When he saw Kryptos again—when, not if—he was slicing him into a jigsaw puzzle for not taking Bill's call. The nerve of that guy, hanging up on a human without even waiting a few words to see if they had anything interesting to say.

(What if it hadn't been an accident, he wondered? What if Kryptos had realized it was Bill and still hung up?)

(No. Of course it was an accident.)

He shut his eyes. He was probably too drunk to dream tonight. Well, he could try again tomorrow. His little lucid dreaming guide was currently teaching him to influence the next night's dream by focusing on a topic before sleep. Maybe tomorrow he could dream about the Nightmare Realm.

He missed home.

####

(Congratulations to the approximately 50% of respondents who correctly figured out Bill's costume when I posted the art on Halloween, you're officially smarter than everybody in Gravity Falls except Ford. This is one of those chapters with a whole lot going on so if you enjoyed, I'd love to hear your comments!!)

#(tbh that's the best Mabel & Dipper I've ever drawn)#bill cipher #human bill cipher #mabel pines #dipper pines #(for both the art & fic)#grunkle ford #grunkle stan #(for just the fic)#gravity falls #gravity falls fanart #gravity falls fic #my writing #my art #fanart #bill goldilocks cipher

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luvrrgirl444 · 7 months

Text

chapter 21: would u rather ft eren

“yo, wassup guys!” connie screamed into the camera. he was sitting in the passenger seat of jean’s car, as usual.

“today we’re back in the car-”

“-my car” jean interrupted.

you, connie and sasha all rolled your eyes.

“anyway, we’re back in jean’s car for would you rather part two, and we’ve got a not so special guest”

“you fucking cunt!” eren shouted from the backseat. he was sat behind connie, with his arm around you. you were sat in between him and sasha. connie mocked eren and flipped him off.

you rolled your eyes. “as this dumbass was saying, today we’re here with eren. aka photography guy. aka that one hot drummer. aka-.”

“bro can you thirst for him on twitter and not in the car.” connie said, gagging.

“not even thirsting, just being real.” you shrugged, making eren chuckle.

“someone spay this motherfucker.”

“shut the fuck up, we didn’t even mention what we’re eating today.” jean interrupted, once again. “sash?”

“today, we’re eating chick-fil-a! because eren’s never had it. allegedly.”

“allegedly?” he questioned.

“yes. anyway, we’ll see you when we get the goods.” sasha said, smiling.

🫧

“WE GOT THE FUCKING GOODS” sasha screamed. “now, we’re gonna get the questions and get this shit started.”

jean pulled out his phone and went into instagram to find the questions.

“alright. would you rather be hot and stupid or ugly and intelligent?”

“hot and stupid” connie responded. “i already am.” he smiled.

“delusional ass” jean replied.

“y’all, please stop gassing connie’s ugly ass up.” you said.

“y’all not funny.” he rolled his eyes.

“ugly and intelligent is obviously the right choice.”eren said.

“definitely.”

“DICKRIDER” connie shouted.

“bitch shut up. as i was saying, those scientist paychecks are heavy. if i’m getting paid millions, i wouldn’t give a fuck about how i looked.” you agreed.

“bitch think she mariah the scientist.”

you rolled your eyes and pulled connie’s ear. “you want me to beat your ass so bad.”

“hot and stupid. i could literally get a modeling job and i’d be rich too.” sasha argued, before taking a sip of her milkshake.

“okay, thats valid.” jean said. “nobody wants to be fucking stupid tho.”

“id rather be stupid than ugly.” connie piped in.

“you’re already both tho?” you said, making everyone giggle, except for connie.

“imma need you to choke on that chicken.”

“moving on.”

“would you rather be bald or have no teeth.” jean read out. “bald. no hesitation.”

“definitely bald, i could literally just wear wigs and nobody would know. those human hair wigs go crazy.” you said.

“being bald is crazy. i’m having no teeth and getting dentures.”

“connie, you’re literally one shave away from being bald” sasha told him. “i’m going bald too, i need my teeth.”

“my hair is my best feature. i’m getting dentures with connie.” eren said.

“my motherfucking man!” connie shouted and dapped eren up.

“you two are fucking insane.” jean grimaced.

🫧

you guys did about 5 more would you rathers before ending the video.

“thats all for today guys, hope you enjoyed us screaming like children! see you in the next video!”

the recording ended there. a black screen then followed, with the question “would you rather choke and die or subscribe to bigcheese4000?” on it.

comments

jaegerbomb: CONNIE WTF IS THIS

⤷ user220: the way he instantly knew it was connie ECVEEVHWHW

jaegerbomb: ugly picture n i still look better than you @conman69

⤷ conman69: WOAH???????

⤷ planetyn: CLOCK HIS TEA BAE

⤷ bigcheeseluvr4: STOP I LOVE THEM

sashluvsfood: chick fil a 🤤

user111: eren’s arm around y/n??? IM SCREAMING

user2020: i need jean

hotgirlsloveyn: WE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE

planetyn: the tattoos im screaming

⤷ user20: “someone spay this mf”

user500: new bigcheese video with EREN???? ABOUT DAMN TIME

🫧

- the way i’ve been neglecting my og series omg..

taglist <3 : @greeniegreengreen @bakuhoes-bxtch @itzgabz22 @princess-jaeger @marsandsaturn @violenthots @roses-arerosies @conniesbbymama @llovergirlll @iheartamajiki @clipperlighter @liliorsstuff-blog @hoohoohope @akvrae @rinslutz @miniaturelunar @sheluvzeren @shigamiryuk @chamomilespetal @booistoleyou @asp7n @heartz444anna @thatartistshar0n @vintagexparker @tsukkisukkii @venusinx @seeingivy @cyberkitty1 @anitatvd @blamemef0rit @crvzy-fujoshi

#aot smau #eren jaeger #connie springer #aot fanfiction #aot x black reader #attack on titan #fake tweets #shingeki no kyojin #x black reader #eren x black reader #anime smau #luvrrgirl444 #jean kirstein #sasha braus

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peachy-wolfhard · 7 months

Text

Dating Leo II

a/n: I wanted to add more after I posted part one so here it is Bone Apple Teeth, I love leo sm so its LONG

Let me know if you would like to be on my tmnt taglist!

Warnings: swearing, grandchildren mention (splinter is gonna splinter), illness mention, insomnia, mentions of slapping leos bald head

Word count: 738 -woof

Insomnia gang

This turtle physically cannot sleep

When you don't spend the night he is CONSTANTLY texting you everything that comes to mind

“y/n…why is pizza a circle?” “idk lee can i come over :3” “yeth pls HURRY IM DYING HERE WITHOUT U”

Lying in his bed, cuddling, matching eyemasks ON, fan ON

Even with all of that, nothing works

The nights that the both of you are actually able to sleep he has a grasp on you

Holds you so close to him all the time, you guys are joined at the hip

Everyone besides Mikey and Splinter thinks you guys are gross

“You can't even say their names apart now it's ALWAYS Leo and y/n. You can't separate them they will DIE without each other”

“Calm down Mikey please you're scaring Shelldon”

Splinter is…well Splinter. He stays in your guys' relationship, with how dramatic you guys are he doesn't need his soaps

He loves to show you baby pictures of the boys esp the ones of Leo

((cough cough he definitely mentions grandchildren like the old man he is))

Bites all the time like anytime anywhere

Making breakfast peacefully listening to music- CHOMP

Getting ready for work- CHOMP

Dr. Delicate Touch has to intervene

Play fights with you in slow-motion

(slow motion voice) “yyy/nnn iiiimm goooinggg tooo kick your aaaasssss”

(also slow motion voice) “im gooonnnaaa kick yours firrrst”

HAND! HOLDING!

Initially, it started as a way to keep Leo from running off when exploring places, but then it turned into a regular thing

“My love, light of my life, future spouse eHEM!”

“What Leo”

“WHERE’S YOUR HAND I AM GOING TO DIE WITHOUT YOUR HAND IN MINE!! I ALREADY FEEL WEAK PLEASE I AM SUFFERING”

Absolute drama queen and don't get me started when he’s sick

Picture those old paintings of the sick children in bed, he’s that but dialed up to eleven

All he wants is cuddles and daytime television and don't you DARE come in between him and his Maury

Giving him medicine is surprisingly easy maybe it’s because he’s so out of it or maybe he’s just in love he’d let you do anything to him

But if you’re ever sick he does the exact same for you

If you fight medicine (just like me fr) he’s NOT afraid to use those ninja moves to get you to take your meds

Loves it when you read to him no matter what you are reading

Manga? Sign him up! Horror book? Let's get spooky! Sad book? I'll get the tissues! He just loves to hear your voice especially if you do different voices for the characters but not overly comedic voices, he’s here for the story!

Falls asleep listening to your voice with his head on your lap 99% of the time

Going to the Hidden City for date nights and getting up to absolute mischief

(having to then call Raph to come get you guys because you pissed someone off and just kicked their butt)

Speaking of the Hidden City! During their break in the Hidden City (when everyone gets arrested) you join Leo at the spa

After he gets kicked out he BEGS you to go to the creepy spa across the street with him

“Sorry sweetheart I too am in DIRE need of some relaxation plus it’s not often I’m in an exclusive club”

The moment he shows up with that gorgeous hair you’re suspicious

Texts you a selfie of his new hair with the creepy ass background

“Whatcha think? Even more handsome than normal? ;)” “go back to being bald i miss slapping ur bald head :(“

Anyway when he starts “sleepwalking” your immediate reaction is “Maybe it's the wig” but quickly forget all about it due to relaxation

“Um… yyyy/nnnn could you please help me out with one teeny tiny situation…? Please?”

Now you and Leo are on the case!

“Ooo lala finally some privacy ;)”

“Don't touch me until you’re bald AND we figure this out”

“Pwetty pwease? JUST ONE!”

“Fine, ONE kiss”

After the evil hair reveal and fighting with your boyfriend’s hair he's finally bald again

Leo explains the massage guy’s deal but it falls on deaf ears

“Hey, who’s that guy?” “He'sthe non-member we kicked out earlier!”

“I bet he and that human are the thieves. Call the cops”

After a quick stay in jail, you’re now peacefully back home

#rottmnt x reader #rottmnt leo x reader #tmnt x reader #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles x reader #rise leo #rise leo x reader #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #leo x reader #masterlist

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sunkissed-zegras · 8 months

Text

✮ 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐲𝐚 𝐛𝐢𝐫𝐭𝐡𝐝𝐚𝐲!, zegras' have more fun au

♡ ─ summary | it's y/n's 19th birthday back in 2022!

♡ ─ warnings | unedited, nothing except some cursing, literally nothing i don't think??

♡ ─ taglist | tbd (check link in navigation!)

♡ ─ ev's notes | okay guys!!! i have a few announcements for y'all! 1 - i've decided that after this post, this won't be a reader insert because...

2 - i am planning to make this a series!!!!!! one of my oc's for this au, brie, will be having her own spinoff with luca fantilli (maybe, we will see...) and it will be confusing so that's why i decided to make the zegras!sister an oc!!!!!!! i will be posting some polls (bc here we are a democracy here 🫡) for the name & brie's love interest so keep a lookout for that!

3 - PLEASE SEND IN SOME ASKS FOR THIS AU! i am running out of ideas quickly, so please send in your thoughts!!!! anyways, that's it lol. sorry for the long A/N!

back to navigation back to AU masterlist

ynzegras ann arbor, michigan

Liked by trevorzegras, briesbagels, lhughes_06 and 8,694 more

ynzegras | glow day with my girls <3 (+ parker)

tagged: briesbagels, avazegras, frienduser1, frienduser2, pchandler68 september 1, 2022

View all 638 comments

briesbagels | birthday bitch!!!! yesss!!!!!!!!!

briesbagels | SHE FLEW ME OUT TO MICHIE IT WAS SO FUN

↳ ynzegras shoulda went to umich instead of uc berk 🙄

↳ lucafantilli ik, shes so much fun too bad she goes to berk 😑

↳ pchandler68 🤨📸

avazegras | OLD LADY !!!!!!!!!

↳ ynzegras shut up. ur literally 2 yrs younger. ur close behind

pchandler68 | ACTUAL photo creds this time!!!!!!

↳ briesbagels all you this time😌

↳ ynzegras thanks park for doing ur job

↳ pchandler68 so u just invited me to ur photographer??

↳ ynzegras yeah it was going to JUST BE A GIRLS NIGHT but ur welcome

↳ lhughes_06 ya she didn't invite me😑

↳ jackhughes or me 😐

↳ ynzegras where tf did u come from???

↳ jackhughes @/elhughes

↳ ynzegras bruh...

_alexturcotte | happy birthday sistaaaa 🩵

↳ ynzegras thanks turcs 🫶🏼

trevorzegras | HAPPY BIRTHDAY *ACTUAL* SISTER

↳ _alexturcotte 😐

↳ ynzegras ty king, almost as old as you 🥰🥰🥰

↳ trevorzegras is she ... being nice for once??????

↳ ynzegras ur making me seem like im a total bitch, im literally so nice

↳ griffinzegras 🤨

↳ pchandler68 🤨🤨

jackhughes | happy birthday, u get my venmo???? 😁😁

↳ ynzegras yes thank you king, finally paying me back for all those times i paid for your coffee

↳ jackhughes u mean literally 3 times??? bro??

↳ ynzegras yeah with ur fucking girly ass 8 dollar drink

↳ jackhughes ok miss "can i get a matcha frap no whip with oatmilk and vanilla cold foam"

↳ ynzegras awww ur memorized my drink 🤞🏼🤞🏼

↳ trevorzegras stop sending money to my sister jack, she has enough

↳ jackhughes no

lhughes_06 | happy birthday 🫶🏼 hope u had fun with ur "girls"

↳ ynzegras thank u AND YES I DID.

↳ lhughes_06 could've invited me, i could've put on a wig

↳ ynzegras no

↳ briesbagels no

_quinnhughes | HAPPY BIRTHDAY LITTLE Z 💘😁

↳ ynzegras ily big hughes

↳ trevorzegras wow...

↳ ynzegras 🤑🤑

lucafantilli | happy birthday 💩

↳ ynzegras thanks king 😇

↳ lucafantilli now can u be our manager 🤓

↳ ynzegras NO. I HAVE OTHER THINGS TO DO.

adamfantilli | happy birthday little zegras 🥳🥳

↳ _quinnhughes thats kind of a me thing... ummm

↳ ynzegras thanks little fantilli 😗

↳ _quinnhughes im such a trend setter 😝😝

markestapa | HAPPY BIRTHDAY MANAGERRRR 😍😍

↳ ynzegras gtfo

↳ markestapa ily too 🤩

edwards.73 | happy 19 freshie 😌🥳🥳🥳

↳ ynzegras thank you ethan 😛

griffinzegras | happy birthday bio sister

↳ _alexturcotte bro.

↳ ynzegras ily, you shoulda come

↳ griffinzegras u and brie literally kicked me out at the door even though i flew out for u

↳ ynzegras WE HAD DINNER OKAY????

juliezegras | happy birthday beautiful daughter, had a great time in ann arbor and will be coming back 🩷🩷

↳ ynzegras ily momma 🥹

trevorzegras anaheim, california

Liked by ynzegras, _alexturcotte, jackhughes and 15,096 more

trevorzegras | 19th bday versus 9th birthday 🥹

happy 19 to my little sister, you never fail to make me proud, you're so special to me and i can't wait to see how you will suceed, me and the whole fam will be there front row to cheer you on forever. you're amazing, never forget that my fav striker 🩷🩷 p.s: you will get your gift when you send me back my north face tshirt u stole tagged: ynzegras ugust 31, 2022

View all 2,438 comments

ynzegras | i love you trev 🥹 also ur not getting back that shirt

↳ trevorzegras no gift for you then

↳ ynzegras k.

↳ trevorzegras jk your package will be there in 2-3 days

↳ ynzegras ily you know me so well

ynzegras | ily but you misspelled succeed

↳ trevorzegras wait really??

↳ ynzegras yeah edit it, love u but its embarrassing

↳ trevorzegras how do u do that??

↳ ynzegras 😐😐

fanuser1 | awww, i forgot trevor had siblings but they're so cute

↳ fanuser2 ikr, they look sm alike tho i see it

↳ ynzegras i do not look like a fish 😑

↳ fanuser2 LMAO PLEASE DAMN

griffinzegras | AWWW fetus y/n, back when she wasn't a bitch

↳ ynzegras shut up griffin im serious.

↳ griffinzegras u didn't disagree tho 😶

avazegras | i'm crying. we were so small 😪

↳ ynzegras dw we are still petite af

↳ avazegras LMAO PLEASE BE SERIOUS Y/N

juliezegras | my babies 🥰🥹

↳ trevorzegras momma 💘

briesbagels | baby y/n 🥹 so cute

↳ ynzegras I KNOW

pchandler68 | throwback to when y/n was actually cute, WHAT HAPPENEDDD

↳ ynzegras ik you're not talking mr. 5head, at least i was a cute kid

↳ pchandler68 WDYM I WAS ADORABLE???

↳ ynzegras yeah whatever helps you sleep at night babe

jackhughes | AWWWWWWWWWWW

fanuser3 | isn't she dating one of the hughes brothers??

↳ fanuser4 NO WHAT SHE ISNT, TREVOR WOULD KILL THEMMM

↳ fanuser3 no i swear i saw a pic of them kissing on pinterest

↳ fanuser5 i thought that was luke

↳ fanuser4 DAYUMMM SHES GETTING THE WHOLE CREW WOW

↳ fanuser6 guys please be fr, shes not gonna be dating jack hughes. this isn't a fanfic 😑😑

226 notes · View notes

megxplryxb · 2 years

Text

Bite Me...

*Note* Hey everyone, sorry for the lack of posts lately, i've been really sick and feeling crap but started to write this on Halloween night and only finished it now. Also, Green with Envy pt. 2 is almost finished so bare with me. Anyway, enjoy your weekend beautiful people <3

Warnings: Smut at the end because we all love smutty Steve.

Pairings: Steve Harrington fem!reader

Disclaimer: I do not take any credit for gifs used.

The sound of children’s laughter and excitement echoed loudly through your usually quiet neighbourhood as Halloween night was finally upon the town of Hawkins, Indiana. You smiled, looking out your bedroom window to see an army of kids hyped up on sugar, running all over the leaf filled streets with their flashlights, knocking on doors, dressed up as monsters and superheroes trying to get as much loot as they could before darkness completely covered the skies and their parents ordered them to call it a night.

Halloween had been your personal favourite holiday ever since you were a little girl, running around trick or treating with your friends, collecting as much candy as you could in your costume of choice for that year, secretly watching horror movies with your older brothers’ to end the evening while your parents were out at some gathering. Now that you were older however, trick or treating had been traded for drinking and partying but the dressing up tradition had always remained firmly intact for you and your friends.

Music blared from the radio on your bedside locker as you added the finishing touches to the vampire outfit you were wearing to Steve Harrington’s Halloween bash at his parents house. Two fake puncture wounds on the side of your neck, eye make up dark and glittery as your mouth featured a pair of plastic fangs. Your usual straight hair now full of long loose curls, black tights matching the colour of your short skirt. Cleavage much fuller than normal as the purple corset top hugged your chest tightly making your boobs spill over the edge ever so slightly. You’d be lying if you said you hadn’t intended on looking a tiny bit slutty tonight, thankful your parents had already long gone to their own Halloween activities to notice what you were wearing.

The beep outside signalled to you that Jonathan had arrived and was waiting patiently outside. The second and continuous beep, signalled to you that he had already picked up Eddie Munson who was not being so patient and wanted you out of the house immediately. You rolled your eyes at your friend’s immaturity, bending down to the mirror on your dressing table, applying the dark shade of lipstick before grabbing your purse and heading out the front door.

“Come on sweetheart, we should be drunk al—SWEET JESUS” Eddie cried, hanging out the car window, stunned as you walked towards your friends, finally getting in to the back seat beside the long haired boy.

“You look amazing!” Nancy squealed excitedly. “You guys do too, you’re really pulling off the blonde wig Nance!” You complimented as Nancy smiled sweetly. She had her and Jonathan’s costumes picked out since the middle of summer, deciding to go as Sandy and Danny from Grease as it was her favourite movie. Jonathan easily agreeing to it once she was happy.

“I know I’m not supposed to say things like this to one of my best friend’s but fuck you look smokin’ hot.” Eddie drooled, eyes glued to your cleavage. He was dressed as some up and coming musician called Slash and swore that this guy was going to be the next up and coming rockstar.

“Eddie can you not be a perv for five minutes?” Nancy pleaded.

“Eyes up here at all times Munson.” You ordered, pointing to your face as he shook his head to focus. “Yes, ma’am.” He joked as you shouldered him playfully.

“Wonder what Harrington is going as this year.” Jonathan quizzed as everyone else shrugged. You knew Steve was dressing as Joel Goodsen from Risky Business, he had showed you the costume two days ago while you lay naked in his bed after another round of mind blowing sex. But that was a secret you had both been keeping from your friends for the last couple of months, because tonight while pretending to be a bloodsucking creature of the night, you also had to pretend that you weren’t in a relationship with one, Steve Harrington.

You weren’t exactly sure when your feelings for Steve had changed from platonic to romantic, maybe those feelings had always been there deep down but you knew something had definitely shifted between you after getting trapped in that Russian elevator back at the Starcourt mall. The way he intertwined his fingers with yours as you sat on the cold floor trying to come up with a plan to get out of there, the way you rested yourself on his shoulder while his hand sat on your thigh, the fact that you had almost kissed while the others were sleeping until Dustin let one rip and pulled you back to reality again, both of you bursting in to quiet fits of laughter. You could see how much Steve had matured by the way he protected you from the Russian guards when they held you captive while Robin, Dustin and Erica had escaped to get help. It was he who took the beatings when they looked for information that neither of you could give, drugging you both in the hopes that someone would let something slip. The only thing Steve let slip in his drugged up state though, was his regret of not getting to kiss you back in the elevator, a regret you silently agreed with.

Neither of you brought it up again after the drugs had worn off and the mind flayer had been defeated. You decided to take Max under your wing after losing her brother and Steve was busy job hunting with Robin after the mall had all but burned to the ground. When you did find yourselves together however, either alone or with the others, you were certain there was a spark between you that neither had noticed before. Things stayed that way for several months, you and Steve being drawn to each other, finding reasons to touch or be near the other, it was something unspoken between you but you both knew it was there. Then, like clockwork, strange things started to occur in Hawkins once more with Chrissy Cunningham mysteriously dying, followed by Fred Benson days later. It didn’t take the group long to figure out another battle was on the horizon.

The battle with Vecna felt darker and more personal than it ever had before. The creature playing on people’s fears and weaknesses, taking pleasure in causing so much terror and pain and for the first time, you weren’t sure it was a fight that you and the others could win. You were fearful for the younger teens safety, hating that they were once again in danger but you all promised to see it through to the end one way or the other.

The night before the final fight, you found yourself at Steve’s house, both realising that if you were going to die, you wanted to spend your last night in the presence of the other. It had become a common theme, finding comfort in each other’s company every time your little town was on the brink of total destruction. Sharing a bottle of whiskey from his parents drinks cabinet, sitting on his living room floor, backs against the couch, listening to music as you talked about all the things you hadn’t gotten to do in life up to that moment. You weren’t sure how it happened or who had initiated it but suddenly your lips were on Steve’s, hands lost in hair, clothes torn off and desperate words being whispered in to each other’s ears. Something that had started out fast and frenzied became slow and passionate, as realisation set in that it might have been your first and last night together. Feelings that had been hidden away for the better part of a year, now out in the open, bodies aching to feel anything other than fear and the next morning you woke in Steve’s bed, laying across his chest as he held you close.

It had been the best night of your life.

Now months later, Vecna was dead and you and Steve were finally a proper couple, although no one else knew that yet. The two of you had been enjoying your time together in secret, getting to know one another better before telling everyone else about your relationship. You knew they’d all be ecstatic, especially Dustin and Max but neither of you were ready to answer any questions yet. So instead, you snuck around like naughty teenagers, trying to steal moments with each other whenever possible and you had to admit, it was pretty fun.

You knew Steve would both love and hate your Halloween costume. He had begged you to tell him what you were going as, pleading with you not to look too revealing as he’d spend all night trying to hide an awkward hard on, knowing he couldn’t touch you without blowing your cover. He should never have told you that because you had made it your job to find the most scandalous clothing possible, wanting to make him suffer.

Jonathan pulled up, parking on the side of the street as you all emptied out of the car. “m’lady” Eddie bowed, offering his hand to help you out, you gladly accepting. “Who said chivalry was dead?” You teased as he winked at you, walking towards the door. Nancy’s soft knock was met by a sneer from Eddie. “Nance, just walk in. No one’s gonna hear your knock with the music that loud.” Jonathan muttered.

“No, Jonathan it’s rude to just walk in to someone’s house!” She argued.

“It’s Steve, I don’t think he’ll be offended.” You laughed. “You’re all wasting valuable drinking time!”. Eddie groaned, finally shuffling by everyone to open the door. The house was already packed with people as you made your way in to find your boyfriend and Robin. Your best friend had also been roped in to help Steve for the better part of two days, cleaning, decorating and shopping for drinks and food for the party, both of you taking over the duties when Steve went to work at the video store. Eventually, you found them both in the kitchen, talking to a bunch of people over a couple of drinks and you couldn’t help but bite your lip seeing Steve in his sunglasses, something about it just made you weak, thoughts immediately turning dirty in your mind.

“You’re here!” Robin gasped, noticing you first as Steve’s attention was pulled from his current conversation to look at you, jaw almost hitting the floor when he saw you. You tried your best to keep your focus on Robin but you couldn’t help notice the lust in his eyes as you mentally undressed each other.

“I know, sorry we’re a bit late, we had to stop at the store for cigarettes for Eddie and then Jonathan forgot his jacket and—”

“I wanna say I’m hearing you but I’m way too distracted by your boobs.” Robin teased as you let out a laugh. “Robin!” You cried, blushing slightly at your friend who was dressed as Carrie, and weirdly pulling it off.

“I’m sorry! It’s just I’ve never seen them so on show before, I don’t know why you don’t show them more often, you have very nice boobies and I’m going to stop talking before Vickie gets here and I get in to trouble.”

“Buckley, stop perving on your best friend.” Steve joked as Robin shoved him playfully. “I’m just complimenting her boobies dingus, girls are allowed to do that sort of thing.” Robin defended.

“Well maybe you should go compliment your girlfriend’s boobies instead because she just walked in the front door.” Steve said encouraging Robin towards the hallway. “Oh, look how cute she looks! I’ll be back in a second.” Robin squealed, running to greet her girlfriend, leaving you and Steve alone as he handed you a red cup full of beer.

“So can I compliment your boobies too or is that weird?” He whispered in a teasing voice. “I’d be highly offended if you didn’t, Harrington.” You flirted back, taking a sip of your drink as he took in the view before him, removing his glasses, placing the temple in his mouth to inspect you further. “Jesus Christ, you’re too fucking hot in that outfit.” He groaned, practically drooling all over the place.

“You’re looking pretty hot yourself, Stevie.” You grinned as he stopped himself from moving closer.

“How am I gonna last the night with you looking like that huh?” He whispered desperately in your ear before the others joined you back in the kitchen.

“What are you guys talking about?” Eddie asked suspiciously as you and Steve both looked at each other…”Boobies.” You said in unison as Eddie laughed excitedly.

“My kind of conversation.”

An hour or so had past and you were back in the kitchen after having danced with Nancy, Robin and Vickie, sitting on the counter top with another drink in hand.

“I think Steve’s seeing someone.” Robin stated, stuffing her face with nachos as you tried not to spit your beer all over the floor.

“What makes you say that?” You asked nervously, looking over at Steve who was sat on the couch in deep conversation with Jonathan and Eddie.

“Well, besides the huge hickey he had on his neck in work last week, he’s not flirting with the customers which is totally unlike him and he hasn’t been on a date in like months. Haven’t you noticed?” Robin asked.

“I guess I haven’t.” You shrugged, avoiding eye contact with her.

“Has he said anything to you?” She questioned as you shifted uncomfortably.

“No, why would he? You’re his best friend, you see him more than I do and I’m sure if he was seeing someone, he’d tell you first.” You assured, feeling slightly guilty for lying to her.

“I don’t know, I mean, I’d really love to meet her if she does exist because he’s been really happy lately, happier than I’ve ever seen him.” Robin revealed smiling at you as you smiled back, heart fluttering at her words about Steve. You weren’t quite sure if she was trying to hint at something but you were thankful when Vickie interrupted the conversation, dragging her girlfriend back to the dance floor again.

A couple of hours past and the party was still in full swing, drinks were flowing, music playing, people dancing and making out. You had just beaten Eddie in beer pong, the two of you deciding to take a couple of shots afterwards for good measure but now you were starting to feel a little light headed, deciding to sneak outside to Steve's back yard for some air.

"Boo." Your boyfriend whispered huskily, wrapping his strong arms around you, nuzzling in to your neck.

"Steve, someone could walk out here at any second!" You giggled, turning to face him.

"What kind of boyfriend would I be if I left you out here all alone huh? Lot's of creepy people out tonight just looking to take advantage of an innocent girl." He teased, as you let his hands roam your body, your arms sliding around his neck. "Is that so?"

"Mmhmm." He nodded, grinning at you.

"Oh Stevie, I think you're underestimating your girlfriend." You flirted, walking slowly to the side of Steve's house, curling your finger, signalling for him to follow you.

"And why is that princess?" He asked licking his lips, catching up to you as you grinned cheekily at him, lifting your skirt ever so slightly to slowly pull your black lace thong down around your ankles before removing them completely, throwing them at your boyfriend.

"Because I'm not very innocent at all."

"Holy shit...." He swallowed, putting a hand through his hair, unable to get any words out of his mouth.

"Steve Harrington lost for words...that's gotta be a first." You smirked, biting your lip as he stared lustfully at you.

Steve had never seen you like this before, usually it was he who would take control, initiate the flirting or the foreplay but here you stood, so bold, so brazen, full of confidence, absolutely radiating sex and fuck, it was turning him on.

"Do you have any idea what you're doing to me right now?" He groaned, closing the space between you, backing you in to the wall. Steve took your hand, placing it on his already hardened cock, priding yourself on your ability to arouse him that quick. "You see what you do to me huh? The way your fuckin' dressed, fuck i've been staring at you all night, just want to ruin you." He whispered.

"I want that too." You moaned, feeling his hand slide between your legs, sliding a finger achingly slow through your folds, letting out a pathetic whine. "So fuckin' wet, always ready for me. Think I could fuck you out here without anyone seeing, baby?" He questioned in your ear, making you shiver excitedly at the thoughts of him fucking you in his backyard. Deep down you knew it was a bad idea but it was hard to care when Steve was whispering dirty things in your ear, promising to make you come over and over again.

"Steve.." You whimpered as his lips met yours, tongue darting in to your mouth. "Wanna know a secret? I've got a thing for vampires and you're the hottest one I've ever seen." He confessed, a darkness in his eyes as the lust began to take over.

"Want me to bite you Stevie?" You teased, nipping lightly at him, leaving wet kisses down his collarbone.

"Oh shit, want you to bite me baby, fucking do it." He pleaded as you sunk your teeth in to his neck. Steve hissing in pleasure as you began to suck on the skin, leaving an instant bruise.

“Oh, oh fuck you’re so hot right now.” He cried, grabbing your hair, holding you in place as you continued to suck and lick his neck.

“Taste good, baby?” He asked as you nodded, proud of the love bite you had left on him.

“Wanna suck on something else now….” You admitted, playing with his belt buckle as he shook his head in disbelief.

“Christ, you’re really trying to kill me.” He stated, throwing his head back as you began to unzip his pants.

“Harrington, where the fuck are you?” Eddie yelled from the house as you quickly pulled apart, knowing it was only a matter of time before your friend checked the yard.

“Shit.” Steve muttered, trying to fix himself before returning to the party, hiding his hickey with the collar of his shirt. “Typical Munson.” He sighed as you fixed your hair and outfit, trying to grab your panties back from your boyfriend.

“Not so fast sweetheart, I’m not finished with you yet, not by a long shot.” He grinned, dangling your lace thong in front of you.

“Steve!” You blushed, trying to grab your underwear again as he stuffed them in to his pants pocket. “I’m gonna keep these for now because what I have planned for you later, doesn’t involve panties.” He smirked as you huffed, folding your arms. Steve slyly smacking your ass as you both walked back in to the house, instantly being greeted by Eddie, wearing a shit eating grin on his face, realising exactly what you two had been up to.

#steve harrington #steve harrington x you #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington smut #steve stranger things #stranger things #stranger things smut #steve harrington fic #steve harrington fanfic #stranger things 4

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hoodharlow · 1 year

Text

No One Else

AN: I'm so sorry I haven't posted this. I was struggling with the beginning and cut a bunch of stuff bc I wasn't vibing. Anyways we get to see Jack work on No Enhancers 🤞🏻 and tyyy to @nattinatalia for the Oscar Isaac edit <3

Requested? 2 of my lovely anons sent in concepts that fit the chapter <3

Warnings: almost smut, brief tension/angst and mentions of vomit

Word Count: 3.8k words

Miriam hugged her Max Mara teddy coat tighter. She was outside in the private landing strip waiting for the jet to open. Jack and his team were in Berlin for one of his shows last night and they flew back to London earlier today because Jack is one of the honorees for GQ's Man of the Year awards. The ceremony was being held later in the evening. Miriam was in London because she was presenting her co-star, Oscar Isaac, at the GQ awards as he's also an honoree.

In addition to that, Miriam was also in London for work. The show she was filming with her mom and Aaron Taylor-Johnson was going to have time jumps throughout the season, but they filmed everything from the past first in Atlanta then the 'present'. The present was taking place in London so that's why she was there with AaronTaylor-Johnson. Her mom's character was only needed for the 'past' scenes. The present is actually the ongoing investigation of her character's random death and the past were what led up to her mysteriously passing.

The private jet finally opened and Jack and his team came trailing behind. Miriam smiled seeing Jack thud down the steps, dick first, but her smile curved down when he walked past her. He turned around and scratched his head as he walked towards her.

"Oh shit I almost didn't recognize you with your new hair." He joked.

"You're not funny." Miriam deadpanned.

Her hair used to reach the middle of her back but she cut it for work and now it's up to her shoulders, but when she straightened it reached her shoulder blades. She was supposed to wear a wig to indicate the time jumps in the show, but the hair stylist couldn't get it to fit without making it obvious she was wearing a wig. So Miriam suggested that they just cut her actual hair to the length they wanted. Either way she was due for a trim because her ends were a mess. Now she rocked curls in a lob.

"I'm just playing." He said, leaning down to kiss her, but she curved him.

"What's your girlfriend gonna think?" She joked.

"I don't know, what do you think?" Jack retorted.

Miriam rolled her eyes in response.

Jack laughed and pulled her into a deep kiss. He slipped his hands inside her coat and slid them down to her ass. He backed Miriam into the SUV. Jack wedged one of his legs in between hers and let her slowly rub herself against his gray sweats. Miriam stood on her tippy toes, pulling him closer. They slowly devoured each other, bodies melting into each other.

Urban cleared his throat dramatically, “You nasties saw each other a week ago fucking chill.”

“I swear I heard the pornhub theme song the second y’all started dry humping each other.” Ace piped up behind them.

“You wish we were on pornhub.” Jack said, hugging Miriam from behind.

“Whenever you guys are ready we can get back to the house.” Miriam said.

“Yeah, me and Urb are staying at the hotel with the rest.” Ace said.

Urban nodded. “We would like to actually sleep and not hear you two go at all night.”

“We’re not gonna go all night, just all afternoon.” Jack smirked.

“I can’t stand you.” Miriam rolled her eyes then got in the car.

Jack jogged to the sprinter van to let his managers know he and Miriam were leaving. They told him that they were getting picked up at seven. He got in the back seat of Miriam’s car and then Beto drove them back to her family’s house.

They arrived half an hour later. Miriam led him inside the house. In the living room were the twins watching tv.

“Shit let me get my noise canceling headphones.” Joseph joked, seeing Jack and Miriam walk passed them. “I want to sleep tonight.”

“It was one time–” Miriam began but she was cut off by her older sister.

“No because these two snuck off to fuck and they were found in a broom closet because of Miriam’s loud ass moans.” she told her twin.

Miriam rolled her eyes as her siblings imitated her and her sex sounds. She grabbed Jack’s wrist and tugged him upstairs. Her siblings always found ways to embarrass her in front of Jack. He found it endearing that her siblings liked him enough to include him in their banter and teases.

“I’m gonna hop in the shower.” he said once they reached her room.

Miriam nodded as she took off her coat and hung it on its hanger. She felt Jack’s eyes on her ass. She overslept and rushed to get ready to pick him up, so she threw on the first pair of leggings she found. What she realized later was that they were a pair of worn out leggings that looked like panty hose around her ass with how thin they got in that area. Thus revealing the bright pink thong she wore under.

“Don’t start.” She warned him.

“I haven’t said anything.” Jack said defensively.

“But I know you.” Miriam eyed him.

Jack didn’t respond. He went into her bathroom and showered. Fifteen minutes later, he came out with a towel wrapped loosely around his hips. Miriam laid in her bed reading a book with her knees bent in only a t-shirt, giving Jack a peek of her thong. He put on some navy blue boxer-briefs. After he did his after shower routine, he climbed on top of Miriam and laid on her chest. He sighed contently and nuzzled his face into her breasts.

Miriam bookmarked her book and set it aside. She brought her hand down and gently scratched Jack’s scalp.

“Are you hungry?” She asked him.

“Not right now. I wanna catch a quick nap.” He mumbled.

“Okay.” She nodded.

Miriam kept playing with his hair, eventually making her way down to his shoulders. She rubbed her thumbs into his shoulder blades, earning a moan from Jack. He was tense as fuck.

“Get off.” she told him.

“Why?” Jack frowned.

“You’re stiff as fuck.”

“My dick isn’t even on you, how did you know?” He smirked.

“No, bro, seriously, I can feel that you're tense. Are you good?” Miriam asked him softly.

“I’m good.” He insisted, trying to shrug it off.

“Jack…”

“Miriam…”

When he started his tour, Jack had been working on his new album to pass the time. Ever since he performed at the Today Show he confessed to Miriam that he had been feeling overwhelmed and overworked, but at the same time it felt like he wasn't doing enough for him and how he had to keep pushing himself to keep the momentum going.

“Let's talk about it later, yeah?”

Miriam nodded, not wanting to pressure him. She got out from under him and grabbed a lotion. Taking advantage that Jack was still laying on his back, she straddled his ass. Miriam pumped a generous amount into her hand and smacked it down on Jack’s back. She rubbed all over his back then she applied more pressure onto him. She worked her fingers into his shoulder blades, making him groan.

"Fuck, Miriam," he whined, "You're so good to me."

"Can you lay on your back porfis?" She asked him.

"Yeah," he nodded.

She got off him allowing him to roll on his back. Jack patted her thigh and Miriam straddled him once more. She put some more lotion on her hand and rubbed his on his chest.

Jack smiled to himself watching Miriam be so focused and diligent. She took her time massaging him. Once she was done with his body she moved up to his neck and face.

"You're my favorite view." He said as he was eye level to her breasts.

"You're annoying." She shook her head, smiling.

"I was expecting a more sarcastic response." He

"I wasn't in the mood to banter." She shrugged.

"But you love my banter." Jack frowned playfully.

"Who said that?" Miriam giggled.

She looked down at his lips then back his blue eyes. She was about to pull back but Jack held her in place by her neck and claimed her lips. It was a slow kiss. She had one hand on his chest balancing herself as Jack moved his hand to cradle her face. His other hand tightly gripped her thigh. He moaned into her mouth, feeling her slowly rutted her hips against the very tall tent in his boxers.

Miriam pulled away and sat, removing her baggy t-shirt. She cupped his cheeks and pulled him into a needy kiss. Jack pushed her down on the bed and continued kissing as Jack skillfully managed to pull her panties and pulled down his boxer-briefs, just enough to get his cock out.

They were interrupted by a loud shriek and her bedroom door slamming shut.

"Miriam, if you're gonna fuck have the decency to close the fucking door." Joseph yelled through the door.

"Hola Vogue, soy Miriam Dominguez and today I'm going to show y'all how I do a simple red carpet glam for tonight's GQ event." Miriam said into the tripod she set up in her large bathroom.

She was filming a Vogue Beauty Secrets video. Originally she was going to do a video of her nighttime routine for when she got home after a long day of filming. But she procrastinated and now she was filming a grwm video. She was going to straighten her hair as well but the nap she and Jack took was longer than expected.

Miriam caught herself in the bathroom's reflection. Her neck and some of her cleavage were marked up.

She looked at the camera like she was in the office and said, "But first we're going to do a quick lesson on how to cover your hickies because my partner is part octopus."

She pulled out her cream color kit. Miriam explained color theory and how complementary colors work in order to mute each other so foundation could cover what needed to be covered.

"See, like nothing." She showed the camera. She was about to put it away but then she remembered that Jack’s neck looked like hers.

Almost like he sensed she needed him, Jack walked in the bathroom with a matcha for her. He was wrapped up in a fluffy robe and had some gel patches under his eyes. When they woke up from their nap, Miriam noticed he had some dark circles from not properly resting. So she put some hydrating gel under eye patches on him so they could make him look more awake. She also put on a pimple patch on his forehead.

"Sit," she motioned at the bidet.

"I was joking when I said we should film a sex–"

Miriam clamped her hand over his mouth. "I'm filming for Vogue."

"Oh," he said softly.

"Let me cover your hickies, so your manager doesn't beat my ass." She said.

"I've seen you kickbox, you can take Neelam." He joked.

Miriam rolled her eyes and got to work. She did the same technique she did on herself, but the only difference was that Jack's hickies were more pronounced because he had lighter skin than her. She also made a foundation base to go on top of his covered hickies that matched his skin tone.

"All done." She said rinsing the pallette where she mixed her colors.

Jack got up and inspected himself. He had no idea how Miriam managed to do that. His neck and collarbones were all one even shade. He wasn't even sure where Miriam marked him up.

"You're fucking talented." He said, sitting back down on the Bidet.

Miriam smiled and went on doing her makeup. She did a set by set process on how she prepared her face with sunscreen, toner, moisturizer and primer. Jack leaned against the sink and watched her in awe as she talked to the camera. He had no idea what she meant but he couldn’t stop staring. Miriam sighed, reaching for a clean makeup wipe. It was her fourth attempt at doing a cute eyeliner design. She wasn't good at eyeshadow so she mainly stuck to one color then did a fun design with eyeliner.

"Am I distracting you?" Jack asked.

"A little." She said, quietly.

"I'll leave you to it then." He said.

"No, it's fine." She waved him off.

"I know you, bro. I gotta work on some stuff anyway."

He got up and squeezed her hips as he passed through.

Miriam smiled to herself then dabbed some more of the soft orchid liquid eyeshadow on her pallette and dipped her thin eyeliner brush over it. She went on talking about Halsey's brand, About Face, has some of her favorite colors to work with for eyeliner looks. She also talked about her look for the night.

It was a vintage long black dress from Gianni Versace’s Fall-Winter 1994. It had the iconic gold-tone Medusa buttons going down the length of her dress. The back was held together with a long strip that went down the middle of her back kinda like overalls. Since the gold buttons were a lot Miriam was keeping her accessories to a minimum. Once she finished her makeup she thanked Vogue and went to her room so she could upload her video to the Vogue team so they could edit and post it in afew days.

She found Jack sitting on her bay window with his MacBook and a notebook on his lap. She liked watching him in the zone. She just hoped that he wasn't pushing himself too much. She knew that he wanted to work on something new that felt more personal to him. She read a few lines that he showed her when she visited him on tour back in October and as a fan she was excited to see where he took his music this time around.

"I can feel you starin'." Jack said, putting his things off to the side.

"Damn, I can't admire my man." She said in a playful tone.

"Knowing you, no." He said sarcastically.

Miriam sat on his lap and ran her nail along the designs of his robe. It was them when noticed that she got them done. They were long and nude pink.

"What are these called?" He said intertwining their fingers together.

"Acrylic nails." She replied.

"No smartass, the shape."

"Oh," she giggled. "These are coffin shaped. Why do you ask?"

"Just wonderin'," he shrugged, looking down at his notebook.

•••

Miriam via Instagram Stories

•••

"Work husband?!" Jack confronted Miriam when she walked in the studio.

Jack, Urban, Ace, and Nickie were at a friend's studio while Jack recorded some of his songs. Miriam had the day off from filming but she spent the day self taping for an audition. She finished that and went to Nandos to bring them food.

"Huh?" Miriam looked at Nickie, Ace, and Urban confused.

"Bro, they're eating me up on Twitter." He said, passing her his phone.

'Dating a bad bitch like Miriam Dominguez is not for the weak. Idk how Jack Harlow is dealing with this.' 'What if Miriam calling Oscar Isaac her work husband was Jack Harlow's 13th reason?' 'Jack Harlow and Oscar Isaac's wife are braver than any US Marine.' She read the tweets to herself. Evidently annoyed, she passed him back the phone. "I'll delete it damn. It was just a joke."

"Bro I'm just kidding, why are you getting so worked up?" Jack asked in an irritated tone.

"And that's our cue." Urban mumbled as he walked out of the room with Ace and Nickie trailed behind him, taking the food she brought them.

"What's up? Like everything was good and then you brought down the vibes." Jack told Miriam.

"Oh so my presence bothers you. Got it." She said, turning on her heel.

"Miriam, that's not what I meant." He sighed. "Obviously something is up, and you're taking it out on me."

"I'm fucking done." She said with her voice cracking at the end. Tears rolled down her cheeks. "I'm so tired. I'm so fucking overwhelmed and…and…"

She didn't finish her sentence. She ran to the nearest trash can and threw up everything she had for breakfast which wasn't much to begin with. One of the tell-tale signs that Miriam was going to have a panic attack was that she threw up. Jack had seen her have her fair share and knew the drill. He knelt behind her and gathered her curls into an oddly shaped bun. He helped her out of her coat and rubbed her back whilst she vomited once more.

"Let's go outside and get you some air." Jack said softly after a few minutes.

Miriam nodded and stood up with his help. Jack draped her coat over her shoulders and took the trash bag out of the trash can. They made their way out to the parking lot. He sat her down on the curb while he went to throw away the bag in a large trash can. The guys were in the sprinter van eating so he went over to get some water, hand sanitizer, gum, and wet wipes for Miriam.

"Here." He said, sitting next to her.

Miriam took a generous sip of the water, swishing it in her mouth before spitting it out. She cleaned her mouth and hands then popped the gum in her mouth.

"I'm sorry for blowing up in your face like that." She said quietly, resting her head on knee.

"Can I ask what made you upset?" He asked, gently pulling her curls out of the bun he did.

"I got my schedule for Poison Ivy. We start rehearsals on the 28th." She sighed. "I thought I was going to have a few weeks off to rest. But I don't even get a week off. We're scheduled to finish filming the show on the 23rd. I won't be able to fly home." She said before tearing up once more.

"C'mere," Jack said, pulling her to his chest.

"I'm so exhausted." She sighed defeatedly. "The show is draining. We're doing fifteen episodes and each one is somewhere between forty minutes to an hour long which is rare for a show on a streaming service."

"I'm sorry."

"Jack, you have nothing to apologize for."

"I know but part of me feels like I should." He said, making her snort.

Miriam nuzzled against his chest. That was when she noticed he was only wearing a long sleeve.

"Bro, why are you only wearing a long sleeve?! Let's get inside before you get sick and your manager beats my ass." She quickly got up and pulled Jack upright.

"I'll be fine."

"Inside now." She said sternly.

"Inside you? Out here? In the parking lot? Damn, you're a freak, Miriam." He smirked.

"You're so unserious." She rolled her eyes.

They went back inside. Surprisingly Miriam had an appetite and ate her food. While the guys went over the beat of a song where Jack talked about himself through different ages of his music career, she pulled out her sketchpad and worked on her designs. It was her design for the upcoming Met Gala. They announced the theme a few weeks ago at Paris Fashion week so she was getting a head start because she was making her own outfit.

If Miriam were being honest, she didn't like the theme. Sure Karl Lagerfeld was iconic, but he'd done her mom and sister dirty. In the 90s he didn't believe that Isabela was the right look for Chanel. Then when Katalina started modeling he would take her out of runway shows at the last minute because she wasn't fitting the vibes for the show and then would get replaced with a white model. There were also some comments he made about women and diversity in fashion that just gave Miriam a bad taste in her mouth. It was also why she didn't own that many Chanel pieces. She didn't feel comfortable spending her money on someone who had those ideals. In addition to him, she stopped supporting brands like: Dior, Dolce and Gabbana, Carolina Herrera and Alexander Wang.

She was invited to the Met Gala but she was planning on walking the red carpet. Though she was positive that what she had planned to wear would get her banned from future Met Galas by Anna Wintour, that wasn't going to stop her from doing what she was going to do.

"Are you busy?" Jack asked, walking up to her.

"No, what's up?" Miriam asked, closing her sketchpad.

"Wanna do some backup vocals for me?"

"You have to contact my manager for payment methods."

"I got a few options but I don't think your mom would want to know what they are." He smirked.

"Okay, jokes aside, my mom does need a contract or whatever y'all have to have on file." She said.

"I'll have Chris send it to her." He reassured her.

"Okay, what do you need me to do?"

Jack pulled her to the soundboard. Miriam sat on one of the spinning chairs and listened attentively to Jack as he explained he wanted her to do a short freestyle at the end for the outro of the song. Truthfully, she was nervous. She's never done something like that. Sure she's quick with her comebacks, but this was different and she didn't want to disappoint Jack.

"Okay we're gonna play the song a few times so you can get a feel for it and when you're ready just go for it." Nickie told Miriam.

"Okay," she nodded, giving him a toothless smile.

Miriam made her way to the soundbooth. She removed her blue sweater vest and tossed it at Jack. She pulled her hair into a ponytail and put on the headset. She kicked her feet on the stool, waiting for the song to play. Within the first seconds, she knew it was the instrumental of the song he wrote for her over a year and a half ago. The lyrics were different from the original. She figured since he used part of the original lyrics in Lil Secret.

She smiled to herself when Jack rapper 'and my baby she a natural.' It had more than one meaning. Of course the obvious was that Miriam has a natural body and she hadn't got any cosmetic surgery done. But the second meaning was something he would sometimes tell her when he'd catch her belting out ballads and be impressed at how effortlessly she would sing.

At the mention of her nails, she looked down at hers. They were exactly like the ones he described in the song. They were her go-to design when she wanted to get her nails done but didn't want to commit to a color or design.

She listened to the song a few more times and eventually she said, "I can't believe you said 'You know I make you laugh like no one else' as if my job isn't acting and I know to fake laugh. Hell, I even fake org–"

"That's good." He cut her off, making her cackle loudly.

•••

@'mdm: in my pop girl era

@'jackharlow: relax, you're just doing backup vocals for me

-> @'jackfan: backup vocals?!?!?! Are we getting a new album

->@'fanofjack: bffr, when would he have time to make it?

->@'anotherjackfan: they're probably just messing around, they're both busy working

@'urbanwyatt: "urb take pictures of me like I know what I'm doing"

-> @'mdm: shushhhh

@'mackshipper: omg they're gonna pull a Big Sean and Jhené Aiko and make a joint album

->@'hater: as if Jack and Miriam had their talent

@'haileesteinfeld: obsessed <3

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Taglist: @cherry4everrr @heavyhitterheaux @carma-fanficaddict @youngharleezyxo @youngharleezy @babyharleezy @that-90s-girllll @alinaharlow @harlowcomehome @nattinatalia @webinurcloset @gassyandsassy1 @jackharloww @awhore4moree @noescapricho-essentimiento @a-moment-captured @neon-lights-and-glitter @purecinnamonextract

#jack harlow smut #jack harlow #jack and miriam #jack harlow insta au #jack harlow instagram au #jack harlow angst #jack harlow fluff

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