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#and thats not even to say the bar is on the floor like i truly believe that. i love meryl for a reason
tomboyyyaoi · 8 months
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o i wanted to make a post that im honestly not smart enough to actually sit down and think out but i like the way meryls trauma doesnt completely woobify her character but does still affect her, it just feels nice to see a female charcater not be completely reduced to a wet soggy mess bc of trauma but also not to (very unrealistically) just Get Over It i think trigun has a nice balance and its refreshing
#also not saying its a secret feminist masterpiece or anything (coz ive seen ppl say that and. come on) but i still think it does well-#enough to be given an appreciative nod#i mean its clear nightow didnt know what to do w milly n meryl after a certain point bc there was just. So much goin on w vash and knives#so he just has the girls do some nomad stuff offscreen until he was ready to bring them back in and yknow what i dont hate that#i think its important to note the women in trigun are fucking amazing tho like. rem meryl luida elendira even lina#and yeah millys underdeveloped but still shes so good#so im not gnna sit here and criticise nightow for being just as misogynistic as some other male mangaka bc i think he does very well#and thats not even to say the bar is on the floor like i truly believe that. i love meryl for a reason#but. ppl can we maybe stop w the 'trigun is so feminist' praise bc lets be real nightow probably just has a thing for strong women#98 anime is a little different tho i was pullin some faces while rewatching some clips.#im obvs talking abt the manga#and stampede is still not done so i wont comment too much on that besides the fact i like where its going (girlwise)#i dont usually like viewing manga thru this lense bc its not the same culture and feminism looks different in japan than it does over here#but i saw a chart. it made me twist up my face and go hrrrrnnnmmmmmnnnnmmnnm..... nnhhnnhhjnnn... mmmmmmmm#jesus i didnt mean to go off in these tags i just wanted to make another 'meryl good' post for the pile#ig im still thinkin abt that chart idk i guess it stuck w me (regretfully)#anyway point is i love meryl for a reason trigun women are great thanks nightow but im not gnna praise him for bein a feminist icon
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xxsabitoxx · 5 months
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Look, Don't Touch
Gojo Satoru x Female Reader
Warnings: Major DUBCON, pervert Satoru, somnophilia, jerking off, whiny, whimpering, need Satoru.
A/N: this is literally a dream I had so naturally here it is in written form... hehe
WORD COUNT: 2,148 | Not proof read (forgive me)
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“Sa-to-ru '' you drawl slowly, giggling as he only whines in response. “I can walk ya know, Sa-to-ru~” but the man refused to put you down, carrying bridal style down the streets of Tokyo with your apartment as his end destination. “Stop talking.” But there was no malice in his tone, he was just getting antsy, and it was all your fault. 
You had been teasing him relentlessly, in the club, at the bar, even now as he carried you home. You weren’t even that bad off but he still didn’t trust you to walk by his side if he set you down. Given the fact that Satoru himself had a couple drinks, he was in no state to chase after you. “Never, you know you love the sound of my voice, Sa-to-ru.”
He did, and the way you drew out his name was sending shrills of need down his spine.
“You’re so mean to me… so fucking cruel.” He whined, not caring how desperate he sounded as he rounded the next corner. “You love how mean I am to you, makes you hard, huh?” You whispered the last part in his ear, giggling softly as you felt him tremble. “So cruel.” was all Satoru could mutter in response, nearly crumbling when your building was in sight. 
“Tell ya what, Sa-to-ru.” You started, head swaying a bit before you decided to rest it on his shoulder. He didn’t answer, trying to ignore your hand gently trialing across the broad plains of his chest. You could feel his heart racing, it excited you to no end. “C’mon, answer me.” You pouted, fingers still trailing along his chest before finding your way to his neck. 
“Go ahead…” his voice strained as he spoke “...Tell me what you want to say.” He knew he’d regret it, the moment you shimmied in his grasp so your lips could ghost his ear. “If you can remember the code to my apartment, I’ll let you spend the night.” You laughed softly as he sighed. “I don’t need a place to sleep, sweetheart.” He tried to sound uninterested but dammit…
“Not to sleep, silly boy.” You teased him further, dragging your nail under his chin and watching him try and fight off the shiver that it sent through his whole body. You watched his throat bob, the grip he had on your body tightening a bit. “I wanna play with you.” You whined softly, legs kicking a bit where they dangled in his grasp. 
“Play with me?” he huffed out, legs carrying him quickly as you spoke. “Yeah, wanna play with your co–” but he cut you off with a choked “Woah!” which only made you laugh harder. “Sorry, Sa-to-ru. The drinks make me feel more than I should.” But the white haired man only shook his head, if he spoke he was certain his restraint would go out the window. 
He wasn’t mad nor was he uncomfortable. Quite the fucking opposite, he was seconds away from taking you up on your drunken offers. He was shouldering the glass double doors open, ignoring any glances the two of you may get by any passersby. He knew your apartment code just like he knew your phone number, he spent enough time over at your place to know. 
“So what you’re telling me…” he clicked the button for your floor as he stepped into the elevator, strong enough to hold you with one hand as he did so. “... you’ll let me fuck you if I remember your apartment code?” He finally smirked down at you, trying not to chuckle at your lidded eyes and smeared lipstick. “Mmhmm, thats exactly what you can do… fuck me really good.” 
His moment of confidence fizzled away at your tone, so seductive, so needy. 
Fuck he wanted you bad… 
By the time the elevator door opened, Satoru was uncomfortably hard. It was the only thing he could truly focus on, the way his cock was stiff in his boxers, straining against the material and slowly leaking. Every step sent shivers up his spine, the material brushing his sensitive cock just right as he stopped in front of your door. “You better know it, Sa-to-ru.”  
Your words had begun to slur from a mix of alcohol and exhaustion, you could feel your own arousal dampening your underwear but you had a funny feeling you wouldn’t even be awake by the time he got you in bed. It took three seconds for him to type your code, door clicking to signal it had been unlocked. “Ha…” soft and triumphant as he pushed his way inside. 
You had been right of course, Satoru hadn’t bothered looking down at you again until he was moving to place you on your plush mattress. “No way…” he choked as he set you down, your eyes shut and chest evening out as you began to snore softly. “Such a fucking tease…” he whined, he should have expected you to pass out. He could feel his own exhaustion the entire walk here…
But you had worked him up so well that his tiredness was long forgotten. Now all Satoru could think about was the aching hard-on he had in his pants. “You’re lucky I’m a gentleman.” He mumbled to you despite you not being able to hear, carefully taking off the shoulders of your dress and pulling it down your body. He would only undress you and tuck you in, that's it. 
At least that was what the rational portion of his mind was saying, the other part was starting to lose its cool at the sight of your bare skin. “You’re so fucking perfect.” Satoru muttered again, trying to restrain himself as he pulled off your pantyhose to toss into the hamper as well. Your panties had dragged down a bit with it, revealing soft skin that made him salivate. 
“This is a form of torture.” he whined, moving to place you up against your pillows. He admired the way you looked, peacefully asleep in nothing but a lacy bra and panties… teasing him thoroughly even in your sleep. The thing is, Satoru couldn’t seem to pull himself away, not even to pull the blankets up and give you some modesty. His feet were glued to his spot on the floor. 
“You… you wouldn’t mind, right? Surely you would understand…” he babbled softly, hands moving to hook in the waistband of your underwear. “Just… just to look. I won’t touch…” His breathing stuttered as your cunt was revealed to him, so soft looking and utterly perfect. Satoru’s cock twitched, reminding him of what he really needed. 
Large, warm hands were spreading your thighs, revealing the sticky, shiny arousal coating your pretty cunt, leaving Satoru’s throat dry. “Fuck…” he was shaking as he undid his pants, pulling them off completely and letting them drop to the floor before stepping out of them. His boxers followed, slightly soiled from his precum dampening the front. 
Satoru was careful, climbing onto your bed and sitting on his knees. You laid before him, fast asleep with your legs spread and cunt out in the open. That was more than enough for him, fuck was it more than enough for him. Satoru’s fist wrapped around his shaft ,giving it a hard squeeze, whining lowly as his pretty eyes locked on your cunt. 
Carefully, he tugged at himself, collecting spit in his mouth to drool down over his length. “You’d be such a fucking tease right now, huh?” he spoke to you, hand moving faster now that his saliva was acting as lubricant. “Bet you’d be telling me how bad you want my dick, huh?” he groaned out, his free hand reaching down to fondle his balls as he watched arousal leak from your cunt. 
“Fuck you’re so cute… even your fucking cunt is cute…” his lips twitched, cheeks flushing pink as he spoke those words to you. Dirty talk was never his forte… unless he was alone… or in this case, the other party was sleeping. He could never say the things he imagined when the other person was present. He could only fantasize about the things he would like to do. 
“I wanna eat your pussy so bad… you’re so mean for falling asleep on me…” 
Satoru whimpered as he thumbed his slit, collecting the precum and massaging it around his sensitive tip. “Fuck it looks so good… wanna bury my face down there and eat you out…” he gasped, squeezing his balls so tight he nearly doubled over from the wave of pleasure that passed through him. “My fist is nothing compared to your pussy…” he drawled out now… cheeks flushed red as his pleasure only grew with his words. 
“Bet you’d feel so good, your nails digging in my hair and keeping me there…” he could feel his mouth water, the thought of going down on you was going to have him blowing his load before he was ready too. “You probably taste so good, fuck I want to eat you out so bad…” he whined, brows creasing as he repeated his desires, his fist gliding up and down his shaft in fluid motions. 
Your thighs twitched in your sleep, threatening to close but Satoru’s hand shot out and stopped you. “A-almost done… please let me keep looking at your pretty pussy… almost done I swear…” but you had long since relaxed again, and his fingers had found their way back to his cock head. Satoru massaged himself, his tip flushed a pretty pink and leaking desperately as he pleased himself to the sight of your cunt. “So good… but your hands would be so much better than mine.” 
He was going to cum, he knew he was, he could feel his cock twitching in his grasp as he whimpered about how badly he needed you. “So cruel to tease me and then leave me hanging, especially when your cunt is so pretty and wet for me…” He kept moving, his pleasure building deep in his gut and making his balls tighten. He was going to cum at any second. “You wanted to play with me and now I’m just playing by myself…” Satoru huffed, chest rising and falling faster. 
“You wanted me to play with your pretty cunt and now you’re sleeping… your punishment is not getting off like I’m about to… but still.” He whimpered as he thumbed his slit again, head falling back momentarily to let out a guttural moan, he certainly knew how to get himself off… but it wasn’t you. Fuck it wasn’t you, your hands, your cunt… “So mean…” he gasped out again. 
Satoru could feel sweat dripping down his brow as his fist pumped along his length over and over, he’d cum soon, so soon, but he didn’t quite want this to end yet. Your cunt looked so inviting, but he wouldn’t dare touch you while you were sleeping. He needed to see your sweet face contort in pleasure when he impaled you on his dick.
“Fuck I want your pussy so bad…"
He could really feel it now, especially with the way his cock was twitching. One glance downward and he knew he wouldn’t last much longer. Blue eyes focused back on your cunt, the idea creeping up his spine and reminding him just how perverted this whole thing was. “You’ll let me cum on your pussy, right? I mean it’s the least you could do…” He wanted to cover your cunt in his release, he wanted to see sticky globs of cum coating your pretty pussy.
“Y-yeah… no better place…” He mumbled, tugging his fist faster as his cock felt heavy in his own grasp, twitching and aching to spill his release. So he scooted closer, pulling your body closer to him as he did so. His cock was hovering just above your cunt now, the heat teasing him as he pumped himself closer and closer to his end. “Gonna cum…fuck I’m gonna cum all over this pretty pussy… so fucking mean.. You’re so mean… so fucking mean…”
He whimpered out, over and over as his eyes squeezed shut. Thick ropes of cum spurted from his head, covering your cunt in sticky white. Satoru didn’t stop, hand moving up and down his length over and over even as the pleasure turned into overstimulation. Whimpers and moans fell from his pretty lips as he watched his cum leak down your cunt and pool just under your ass.
“Ruined your sheets…” Satoru spoke to himself, still incredibly turned on by the sight of your cunt covered in his release. “A-again.. You wouldn’t mind if I did it again…” His cock hadn’t softened after all, still stiff and aching in his palm despite dumping a load on you. “You just drive me crazy… you and that cunt…” He whined, fist already moving again while you slept
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aliaology · 2 months
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STAY DONE
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SUMMARY: you know you and alex should break up, but you’re too in love with him to stay done.
PAIRING: alexander holtz x fem!reader
WARNINGS: semi-toxic (?) relationship, slight cheating, blood
EXTRA: i know alex (most likely) wouldn’t actually cheat, but its just for the fic! my boy needs more about him done. also THIS SUCKS LMFAOO im a lil rusty. BASED ON A SONG.
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the look in your eyes even after he yells at you was something truly remarkable, incredible even. the awe-struck gaze your eyes held as the boy in front of you angrily spoke. his anger may not have been directed at you, but he was definitely taking it out on you.
his narrowed eyes and irritated tone as he went on and on about his hockey game made your stomach twist and knot. the feeling only going away as he punches one of the picture frames, causing the glass to shatter and the frame to fall to the floor.
your awe-struck gaze was no more, and was now filled with worried as he walked into the bedroom, mumbling curses under his breath. you let out a sigh as you grabbed the broom from the closet. you swept the broken glass up and removed the picture from the frame. it was a picture of you and him when you visited italy.
you gave the picture a sad look before placing it on the counter and throwing the frame into the trash bag, along with the broken glass. after putting the broom back, you walked into your shared room, alex sitting on the side of the bed with his head in his hands. blood dripped from his knuckles and down his hands.
you walked into the bathroom, grabbing a few bandages and alcohol wipes. kneeling down in front of him, you removed his hands from his face, gently.
“i think you played well tonight, alex.” you spoke softly. grabbing an alcohol wipe, you carefully wiped up the blood and the wound, causing him to hiss in pain.
“can’t say much when i was only on the ice for like five minutes. i make one mistake and lindy fucking benches me.” he spoke angrily.
you gently wrapped his hand. “i think you should talk to them about being traded.” you told.
alex scoffed out a laughed. you gave him a look. “im being serious, alex. this team is messing you up— you know you deserve better.”
alex sighed, “ill think about it, alright?”
you nodded and stood up, placing a small kiss on his cheek before bringing everything back into the bathroom, and throwing out the bloody wipes.
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you huffed out a breath, knowing how idiotic you looked in front of your friends. you told yourself you would be taking a break from alex, that you would give yourself space, find yourself.
you needed it, especially after finding out he was hitting up other girls. hearing this— you stayed cordial, but honestly, you wish you went off on him. you wish you didn’t stay calm.
but thats the thing with alex, as you stand here calling him, you realize you can’t stay done with him. he was a constant need in your life, he was the sun and you revolved around him.
“hello?” his voice sounded through your phone.
you let out a shaky breath. you stood on the sidewalk, your little black dress keeping almost nothing warm. you held your large coat close to you.
“can you come get me? please?” you asked.
you could hear a deep breath escape his lips before he talked. “where are you?” he questioned. you could hear the sound of clothes rustling, then the sound of his keys jangling.
“outside of the bar on hawkins.” you told, shivering slightly.
“jesus christ baby— outside? seriously? are you by yourself?” he asked.
“yeah.” you muttered into the phone.
you could hear him swear under his breath, the sound of his car door opening and shutting rang through your ears. “get inside that damn bar, wait near the doors.” he demanded.
you hastily obeyed and stood inside, right next to the doors. he stayed on the phone with you the entire time, letting you know when he was close.
once he got there, and you hung up, getting into his car, he gave you an irritated look.
“dont you ever do that again— you hear me? do you know how dangerous it is? standing out there by yourself in the middle of the night?” he spoke.
his tone was harsh, but he clearly was worried, at least you hoped. “im sorry”
he sighed. “dont apologize. lets just, lets get to the apartment.”
you nodded and titled your head against the window, watching the lights as you passed them. you hated the feeling of not being able to be the bigger person and leave.
alex was your best friend, but your enemy. he loved you and hated you. you loved him, and loved him, and hated him. but there was no one else you wanted to wake up to. no one else you wanted to go to bed with.
you just couldn’t stay done with him.
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im unable to tag everyone!
TAGS: @slaythehousebootsdown13 , @lxnceclercs , @honethatty12 , @outrunangelss , @absolutelyhugh3s , @hockeyboysarehot , @lovinbarzal , @shadowsndaisies , @um-mads , @bqbylon , @whoreforthehughesbrothers , @Robloxlover2007 , @p3nislawd , @alexx-stancati , @queenmendes , @-eedwardss , @if-my-heart-bleeds , @love-like-woaah , @freds-slut , @sleepybesson , @love4lando , @equallyshaw , @bellstwd , @ivy-34 , @slafgoalskybaby , @hischierxx , @dancerbailey3 , @jackhughesily , @cstads-blog , @ru-kru , @sbrn0905 , @love4ldr , @loveforaugust
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lostmyremembrall · 1 year
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congratulations on 1K! you definitely deserve it! I absolutely adore your characterization for tom, and am always so excited whenever you post!
I would love to join the event if it's still going on! could i request the diadem (👑)? my name’s jennifer, im a slytherin, and i grew up with tom at wools orphanage. im physically affectionate, love to read and explore, and i like to joke around, lightly flirt with, and tease people. i normally keep most people at arms length though, so its rare for me to become close to anyone. when i truly care for someone though, i love to spoil them and spend time with them. i normally seem unapproachable, but im actually pretty friendly. im sure that after enough time has passed, id have fallen for tom, but i don't think he'd be interested, so im sure id bottle it up inside of me.
sorry if thats too detailed! i got carried away thinking about it! would it be possible to do tom riddle era (1930's - 1940's)?
once again, thank you for the fun event, and i hope you enjoy writing for our lord and savior tom riddle as much as we all enjoy reading your stories! 💚
👑𝐘𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐇𝐨𝐠𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐘𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬
𝓙𝓮𝓷𝓷𝓲𝓯𝓮𝓻
A/N: Thank you so much for your request! As I was writing this, I kept thinking how perfect of a pair you and Tom would make! But alas, you've asked for a diadem so I'll stick to your storyline of unrequited love.
I am sorry this took so long, and I appreciate your patience! I'm also sorry that this got rly long. I feel like it ended up being more like a fanfic rather than an HC. If you're not happy with it, or feel like this character isn't really you (especially the decision you make to forgive Tom at the end), feel free to DM and I'll redo it!
𝐶𝑜𝑚𝑒 𝐽𝑜𝑖𝑛 𝑡ℎ𝑒 1𝐾 𝐸𝑣𝑒𝑛𝑡! Now closed
𝐎𝐫𝐩𝐡𝐚𝐧𝐚𝐠𝐞 𝐘𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬
You were born the same year as Tom. With Tom's birthday being the last day of the year, you are always older than him, a fact Tom's not particularly fond of.
It took a long time for Tom to come around, but he had plenty of time to observe you and understand you as a person before approaching you for an alliance.
Needless to say, surviving an orphanage in the 1920s brought you and Tom close.
You two had to stick together in these hard times if it meant surviving your childhood. The malnutrition. Cholera. Tuberculosis. The flu. There were plenty of opportunities for either of you to die.
When the two of you were being scolded by Mrs. Cole, you two would hold hands together in solidarity.
Even with your eyes turned to the floor, you knew Tom was next to you, going through the same thing. And that was comfort enough for the two of you.
That meant if either had a chance to steal some food from the local vendors, you were sharing it.
One time, Tom managed to steal a candy bar called 'Milky Way' from America.
As malnourished children, the two of you ate that up in minutes.
It's one of your fond memories, hiding in the alleyway after school as the two lick your fingers clean.
Tom knew you were loyal, a trait he most appreciated about you. He knew that whatever he did to other orphans, you weren't going to rat on the Matron.
Tom displayed his magic first, and of course, he showed it to you and you only.
When you displayed your magic, he was disappointed at first, that he wasn't the special one.
But, as soon as he realised that his magic was superior to yours (and everyone's, the nerve of him), he grew to appreciate that he can share this with his closest friend.
--
It felt like winning the lottery when you both got the visit from Dumbledore.
The world was your oyster, free to explore and take to your content with Tom.
Visiting Diagon Alley together, and shopping for Hogwarts as you two experienced everything new, is also one of your cherished memories.
A sense of solidarity brought you two even closer, to challenge and learn about the new world together. You two were literally inseparable.
A lot of your time is spent with Tom, exploring the wizarding world, whether through books or in real life.
After spending your first night in the Slytherin dorm, you and Tom met up to discuss. You both agreed that, in order to survive this pureblood frenzied house, it would be wise not to disclose about the muggle orphanage you two grew up in.
𝐀𝐜𝐚𝐝𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐜𝐬
You are an excellent student, always learning and reading.
Professors do notice your teasing remarks in class when someone embarrasses themselves. But, some professors enjoy your comments and are more lenient than others as long as it's not too disruptive.
You're quite good at Care for Magical Creatures.
After having to take care of some creatures during class, some of these beasts really grew on you.
You spoil them by stealing some food from the kitchen or the Great Hall, giving them a taste of "real food" as you say.
In the later years, when you and Tom stopped sneaking into the kitchen, this comforted you and replicated the endearing memories of sharing food with Tom.
Being the high-achieving Slytherin that you are with the actual ability and interest in classes, you easily make it to prefect.
Dumbledore is somewhat cautious of you, suspecting that you might be enabling Tom.
𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬
You may be intimidating at first, but you end up being quite popular as people figure out that you're friendly and kind, unlike some of the Slytherins.
Your jokes and teases are funny, and everyone knows it's always a fun time when you're involved.
Others may think they know you quite well.
But, you know that they don't know the real you. You wouldn't call them your close friends.
Really, the only person that would fit that category is Tom, who's practically known you for your entire life.
With your fun, flirty nature and teases, some people turn bright red, not used to the direct advances. And they love that. They love your attention and tease.
Needless to say, you get quite a few letters from secret admirers.
(𝐓𝐡𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐥𝐢𝐜𝐚𝐭𝐞𝐝) 𝐑𝐞𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐡𝐢𝐩 𝐰𝐢𝐭𝐡 𝐓𝐨𝐦
The first few years felt just like before with Tom, just in a different environment.
Sneaking out of the dorm at night to explore the castle.
Stealing some late-night dessert from the kitchen to eat on top of the Astronomy Tower, enjoying the sugar that is definitely a luxury back home.
Sneaking into the Forbidden Forest. Exploring Hogsmeade.
Only Tom got your special attention. You would spoil him with your time and love and gifts.
Tom was the same. He truly cared for you and you only, and he expressed his appreciation for you in a similar way.
Before you go to sleep, you'd find a small box, hidden underneath your pillow.
However Tom got into the girl's dorm will remain a mystery.
Sometimes, they're notes detailing the earnest feelings he couldn't confide to anyone else. His anxiety. His fears. His joy.
Oftentimes, they're expensive jewellery, maybe purchased, maybe stolen.
"The prettiest jewellery for the prettiest girl I know"
The note would say in a childish attempt at being suave.
But, starting 4th year, things began to feel different. He's grown tall. His intellectual eyes always looking straight ahead. His sharp cheekbones and jawlines signalling his approaching adulthood.
You began to feel a flutter in your heart every time he caught your eyes in class.
--
At the same time, you noticed a change in Tom as well. You couldn't quite place it, but it felt like he was growing out of your reach.
Like you weren't just two kids that goof around anymore.
Some would say that's only natural as children begin to recognise the changes and differences between the genders. But, you felt like there was something more than just that.
He would spend hours in the library, researching something.
It no longer seemed like having fun exploring with you was the priority for Tom, as he focused on his studies and his achievements.
His talents were unheard of, and you felt the bitterness that he was going to places you cannot follow.
He would still hang out with you, though it was no longer just you he hung out with. Abraxas Malfoy, Lestrange, Avery, and a few other Slytherins began taking up Tom's time.
It seemed like they were meeting late at night without you. When you inquired Tom about it, he merely chuckled,
He'd lift your chin up with his fingers with a smirk
"Wouldn't want to join some vulgar conversation of teenage boys, do you?"
You'd freeze under his teasing gaze. Who wouldn't?
Taking your silence as a cue for agreement, Tom would run his thumb over your cheeks.
"Now, smile - for me."
Countless times you've thought about telling him, writing to him about how you felt about him.
But, you'd see his large shoulders, hunched over the table as he focused on assignments or creating new spells
And every time, you'd end up swallowing the words, knowing Tom had his mind set on things greater than romance.
--
It's in the late 5th year when you begin to worry about Tom's mental health.
One night, he comes bursting into your room. Agitated, he is pacing back and forth in front of you.
He knows your loyalty, so he knew he could only come to you to open up about the murder he's just committed.
It finally dawns on you what had been distancing you from Tom this whole time.
It was his hidden obsession with his family line, the Dark Arts, his rage and vengeance: all of the things Tom had kept from you this whole time.
You place a comforting hand on his trembling cheeks as he looks up to you with teary eyes, almost pleading silently, as if begging for your forgiveness. Your acceptance.
As you look into his eyes, his face line still retaining a bit of that youthful innocence, you'd wonder 'where it all went wrong.'
Where did your Tom go? That endearing boy who would steal candy bars for you. That kind, protective boy who would gift you jewellery, calling you his 'one and only.'
You seriously pondered, whether you recognised the Tom in front of you. Whether you were ready to forgive him.
But still, you couldn't get the image of his kind smile out of your mind. The way he used to smile before it all went to shit.
His soft lips curved in a similar way, still. His eyes still shimmered innocently, still.
In the end, you made him promise not to delve into Dark Arts again. It ends here.
And that he'll come to you whenever his rage and vengeance overtook him.
Tom flashed the most beautiful smile up at you. A tear pouring out in relief.
He took your hands and hastily pressed his lips to it, causing you to feel a clenching pang in your heart.
"I promise, Jennifer," he said with a smile. "I won't let you down."
We all know that Tom wouldn't keep his promise.
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hollyhomburg · 2 years
Note
Oh my God Li!!!!!!!!!!!!! The latest chapter ksjdkksjdjdmd. I am: here with my thoughts. (I took notes while reading, bc originally I started reading this in public and cried at Tae's poem so I had to wait until I got home and start all over.)
-The part where Min was like tell me everything you love about Tae, even if I've already heard it.:(((((((( he's so sweet I love the way he loves her!!!
-I am so proud!!!!! Of m/c for standing up to the alpha in the bar, I loved that for her!
-WHEN JIMIN CHOKED ON HIS WATER!!!! BC OF HER!!!!! AND HE WAS JUST SITTING THERE ALL FLUSTERED WITH PINK CHEEKS SKJDKDJEH
-There's just something about Minnie's hands on her and "to run your bathwater, to make you a plate." In the background:((((((
-TAE'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! POEM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU WERE RIGHT DJDJJDKD I LOVE IT SO MUCH IT KILLED ME
-"All writers know that there is only one way to ensure you do not die alone." This line truly had me floored, I am so in love with this.
-"My love speaks and butterflies find it safe to hatch"???????????????? "The breath before a first kiss made human"??????????????? CinEMATIC!!!!
-When Tae was like "I have never felt beautiful" with her face hung and eyes closed I:(((((((((( Tae baby:((((( my poor smol sweet:(((((((((
-I AM THE PERSON YOU HAVE CHOSEN TO LOVE AND THAT MAKES ME A MOST BEAUTIFUL THING TOO I TRULY HAD TO STOP READING THE FIRST TIME BC I WAS CRYING IN PUBLIC LMAOOOO THAT LINE TOOK ME OUT COMPLETELY
-Tae's poem truly was perfect.
-When Minnie thought of m/c as the precious thing that made Tae feel beautiful. 😭😭😭😭😭😭
-NOT HYEJIN AND MOONBYUL THE WAY I NEARLY FORGOT ABOUT THEM SJDJJDJD NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO MC IS ABOUT TO BOLT
This was such a wonderful chapter, truly one of my favorites and I say that everytime but then the next update comes and it's once again amazing, so. This was so beautiful, thank you so much for writing it. I hope you're doing well and are happy and safe. 😊😊💞💞
-🍓
ahhhh thank you for this message~ there are so many that i never get around to answering and im trying to make an effort to scroll back more and answer the ones that i wasn't able to sit down with when i first got them!
ahhhhh im so sorry i made you cry and public! it always sup-rises me when people have such visceral reactions to the things that i write~ as for the line of like "all writers know there is only one way to die alone" i honestly could have gone on for pages about it and about how writing is honestly the only way to like, transfer a bit of your soul to someone else???? but i digress.
i think the m/c might be learning to be brave a little more! she really is starting to heal and growing to be able to say what she wants and it's been really enjoyable to write <3 it won't stick forever but! its good to have a silver lining.
i think that with jimin- i just try to write him as devoted as possible, because he really is like- truly loyal to the people he loves to an exponential degree, thats why i really wanted to contrast his actions with the poem because even if it's just sensual in action, its very intimate for minnie, loving the others physically is more than just a hallow desire for him.
ahhhhh thank you for this ask, it really made me smile so much <3 im sorry it took me so long to answer! next weekend <3 you'll have more to squeel about strawbaby anon!
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ducknotinarow · 2 years
Note
[I WATCH AVENGERS ASSEMBLE FOR THE PLOT]
"Seventy years Captain!" Dracula exclaimed, keeping Steve pinned to the concrete floor, "I have waited seventy years to have you; do you really think I'm foolish enough to wait a moment longer?"
Course not; he's done his time. Barring his fang, he gives a soft hiss,
"Now hold still my Captain; I won't bite too hard."
| Muse interactions [Thats a bald-faced lie uwu] Some reunions from Steves's past were met with a lot of mixed emotions. Finding himself in a whole new world almost was bad enough and yet somehow a lot of his past seemed to have followed him or in the case of him and Dracula waited for him. But seem patience is not something a near-immortal being truly knew or well Drac at least didn't have an ounce of it when it came to Steve.
It felt like the full force of a semi had lunched itself right at Steve, with the force Dracula had nearly thrown himself at the soldier. Back met cold concrete knocked the air right out from him as his head lurched forward. Needing to expel the air right out of his lungs as he gasps harshly after. Left to lower his head back to the ground, Drac was refuse to move once they had Steve right where they deemed him to need to be. Taking all in Steve in the least set his hands flat and firmly against Drac's shoulders. Just enough to keep them back a little. "Seventy years Captain!"
Was all they soon yelled out to Steve, as they in turn kept Steve down on the ground, even if Steve struggled to try and get free the hold Drac had on him was clearly strong than Steve's struggle to break out of it. Even if it wasn't so much the intent Steve was having at the moment, in the least he needed them to just fucking calm down.
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"For crying out loud Drac just wait for a second and-" "I have waited seventy years to have you; do you really think I'm foolish enough to wait a moment longer?"
Alright then seemed reason was not an option at the moment. Seeing how Drac wasn't even giving Steve a moment to speak to try and wind them down. He realized it had been a long time since he last likes them have a taste and sure those vampire cravings must be a pain and killer to handle and deal with. How was Steve meant to get back in touch with them though? It wasn't all that easy to get into thier so-called kingdom of eternal darkness as they may think after all. Eyes widen just a bit when seeing Drac bare his fangs at Steve a hiss escaping them, as they were winning out in thier struggle. He could feel Drac's body pressing down on to himself as they lowered further in to get close to his neck.
"Drac-" Steve tried to interject with
"Now hold still my Captain; I won't bite too hard."
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Steve didn't buy that for one second he knew Drac clearly had hit their limit here and no matter what they were going to take what they wanted from Steve. Bodies press up against each other, the loud hissing from above him was all just drawing out any rhyme or reasons to the soldier's own mind. The grip on Drac's shoulders was slipping as they were nearly crushing down on Steve, bodies glued to one another.
"If you would just wait a bit more you could have me a bit more personally now would you just relax, it's not like I asked to frozen away for seventy years, unlike you running off and breaking an old alliance to work along with him."
Steve went on to say, now was maybe not the time to be picking this fight with Drac but it was why he was keeping this reunion from going how Drac maybe preferred it to go down. And in part Steve as well. If Steve had it his way this reunion would have been far nicer and less Drac trying to devour him as if they were mere seconds from dying sure. Gripping onto thier shoulders and gritting his teeth Steve leaned his head back and threw it forward slamming his forehead into Dracs. Recoiling from the pain a second as he struggles to open his eyes seeing nothing but stars. "if you would relax I might actually let you, idiot!" Steve slightly fixed them with a glare in turn "You act like you were the only one who was stuck waiting. I didn't plan to go down on the ice that day or leave you behind like I had. I didn't even think I'd make it out alive! much less get to see you again only to find out your off teaming up with skull now? the reason I was frozen away for all that time?!" but now was when Steve picked to have this fight. "So if you want so much as even a drop of blood you better start talking, kind of vampires or not I'm not letting you have a single taste till then got it?" though the threat may be a bit on the empty side considering thier current predicament.
Left to just stare at them fangs bared, and a clear hunger lying in thier red eyes. Hands let go of thier shoulders and were fast to take the sides of their face, yanking them down. Drac wanted blood, Steve wanted a fight but instead, he could feel teeth cut his lip as he captured Darculs mouth into a long-awaited kiss. It had been so long since he had this feeling against his own lips. Thier cold flesh messes with his warm ones. Even with the trickling of blood mixing into it thanks to someone going a tad early on thier own end. Finally letting it break once he found himself gasping for breath. He didn't let go of thier face though, simply held them there in place as he panted softly trying to catch his breath best he could.
"I'm still mad, but I've missed you Drac."
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Text
Some Like It Rough
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Gif credit @bodybebangin
18+ fic. SMUT SMUT AND MORE SMUT.
Taglist @ackles-nhl. @cbouvier23.
Hope everyone enjoys it.
Happy reading dollies
"I needed you. Where were you tonight"? Kayce sat on the edge of the bed holding his ribs.
"I was out with Beth". You leaned over and grabbed the medical bag.
"For six hours"!? Kayce hissed when you pressed on his side.
"We talked, she drank...a lot. Then we played some pool at the bar". You tell him wrapping his ribs up.
"Meet any guys"? Kayce nibbled on his lip, looking up at you.
"Not this again. I didn't talk to anyone except Beth and the bartender".
"Was he a guy"!? Kayce grunted as he tried to lay down on the bed. You huffed and put the medical bag back in the bathroom.
"Yes, he was. We hooked up in the bathroom while Beth table danced. He also has a wife and a kid on the way". You lied about two things but Kayce didnt care even if you joked. He was jealous.
"I think you should go stay with your parents. We need some time". Kayce sighed, getting comfortable in the bed.
"Why? So you can go fuck every girl you see? Thats what you want? Go for it". You aggressively grabbed your duffel bag and started stuffing your clothes inside. "You wanna know something, the whole time we talked we talked about you and I. Like I couldn't shut up about you. Beth was there ask her. Because I know she wont lie for me". You scoffed and grabbed your keys.
"Y/N, I'm sorry".
"I'm tired of your sorrys. You start a fight and then apologize. We never solve anything. I'm sick of it. That's all we do, since you got back. You need to grow up and figure out what you want whether it has me in it or not. Figure out your shit". You slammed the door behind you. Kayce had a lot to think about. First he hated being alone when he was hurt. He needed comfort. So he went to his big sister.
"So what was this fight about this time"? Beth lit up a cigarette.
"What happened at the bar"? Kayce relaxed in his rocking chair with a groan holding his side.
"We talked and I got a drink. What's all this about? I thought you two were good"?
"We were but I guess my jealousy took over. She came home looking good. Guys must have talked to her. Drooling over her and shit".
"The only guy we talked to was the bartender. He was nice. But married".
"So you didn't table dance"? Kayce chuckled when he figured out he was an asshole.
"Hell no. I'm not that drunk". Beth laughed.
"I think you owe her more than just a shit I'm sorry. You need to fuck her brains out". Beth looked at Kayce seriously.
"I'm not talking about this with you". Kayce gasped getting up from the rocking chair.
"I'm a girl. I know what we want. We want a hard rough fuck and a man that knows what the hell he wants. Not some chicken shit. So grow up and tell that girl you love her. And fuck her brains out". Beth sat back in her chair proudly. She knew her shit.
"Well, it'll have to be a slow fuck cause I'm banged up". Kayce laughed with a hiss.
"Just give her that dick good and she'll know you love her".
"Oh my god. I'm leaving. My sister just said good dick in the same sentence. Have a good night. Thanks". Kayce struggled as he tried leaning over to kiss Beth's head.
"That was the pg version. I could've gone graphic. You know me". She laughed as Kayce shook his head and limped down to his car.
Kayce knew what he wanted. He wanted you. He needed you. Kayce called your cell and nothing. He called your parents, nothing. He was starting to get worried. But he knew you wouldn't go stay with friends cause they would tell so he searched at the hotels around. Only two near the house. One was a nice place and the other was a hole in the wall.
"Is there a Y/N Dutton registered here"? Kayce asked the night clerk at the front desk of the nice place.
The lady typed on the computer. "Sorry no ones named that here".
"Can you try Y/N Y/L/N"? Kayce knew if you didnt use the Dutton last name then you would use your last name.
"She's here. Room 204. But am I allowed to give you her number? You a serial killer or something"? She was hesitant on giving Kayce the key.
This made Kayce chuckle. "No ma'am, I'm her boyfriend. We're in a long distance relationship right now but she's thinking about moving here". Kayce made up something so she would give him the key.
"Alright but if I find her in the morning dead, I saw your face and I will identify you. I'm not scared of you". The clerk pulled out a shotgun.
"Yes, ma'am. That's not going to happen though. You may hear some screaming and moaning but that's not from what you're thinking of". Kayce blushed a little but was honest, he didnt want her busting in and pointing that shotgun at him.
"You do you, boo. Go get your girl". She smiled and patted his hand as she passed him the key. Kayce snickered and started up the what felt like a hundred stairs. He groaned and grunted as he walked up holding his side. In his mind he was just hoping he was able to make you moan and not pass out at your feet.
Kayce knocked on the door. "Who is it"? Kayce heard your voice and smirked.
"Room service". Kayce disguised his voice.
The door opened and his eyes went wide, you cracked the door open in a towel. You had just got out of the shower.
"Kayce, what are you doing here"?
"Um, I, god you're beautiful". Kayce stepped in, licking his lips. He grabbed you by the waist and captured your lips with his. He closed the door behind him with his boot and your towel fell to the floor.
"Kayce"? You gasped when Kayce lifted you up, your legs immediately went around his waist. His calloused hands dug into your back as he kissed you.
Kayces knees hit the bed and he slowly laid you down. He released your lips and stood back.
You closed your legs and covered your chest.  "Don't hide from me". Kayces husky voice made you tremble. Your inner thighs became wet. The heat from your center was radiating off of you.
Kayce smirked as he brought his shirt over his head and threw it across the room. He kicked off his boots and unbuckled his pants, letting them fall to the floor. When he first came he was hurting but as soon as he saw you. What pain?
He was already so hard. He could have hammered a nail with his hard on.
"Open your legs, baby. Let daddy see". Only a few times has Kayce went daddy and every time the night was amazing so you hardly ever done it so it could be special.
You let out a squeak, your legs falling open. Kayce smirked to himself when he saw how wet you were already. He took his middle  finger and touched your clit. You thought you could have came right there. You bit your lip to quiet your moans.
Kayce chuckled, his slipped his fingers through your slit with ease, massaging your with his palm. "You like when daddy does this, dont you"? Kayce evil chuckled. You nodded.
Kayce bent down and got on his knees, he grabbed you by the hips and pulled you to the edge of the bed. He started kissing your inner thighs. His beard tickled, but you loved it.
"Mmm". You started to buck your hips but Kayce held you down with his strong hands.
"Someone's eager". Kayce was inches away from your clit, you felt his hot break on your pussy lips. You felt yourself get wetter.
Kayce took the tip of his tongue and flicked your clit. Making you whimper to be touched.
He flattened out his tongue and pressed hard against your clit and started wiggling his tongue.
"Fuck". You gasped, your hand went to his hair.
He sucked on your clit, his middle and index finger teasing your entrance then slowly pushing in. It was driving you crazy for him not to be rough on you.
"Daddy". You moaned his name and he went faster. It encouraged him to go rougher. His fingers went in deep and rough. His middle finger pushing against your g-spot. "Oh fuck". One hand tangled in his hair and the other one holding on to the sheets.
"I'm gonna cum". Kayce sucked you clit as he looked up at you, his fingers never losing their pace. "I'm cumming. I'm cumming". You screamed over and over as you felt your first orgasm take over your body. It trembled and shaked as he kept fingering. He let go of your clit with a pop. Your hand reached down and stopped his. You couldnt take it.
"Such a good girl for daddy". Kayce grinned smacking his lips as he climbed up your body. He helped you scoot up the bed. His eyes never leaving yours. You let out a giggle, a blush upon your face.
"I just wanted to say...". You cut Kayce off by a kiss to the lips.
"Shut up and fuck me". You pulled Kayce on top of you. Wrapping your legs around him, a knot tied with your legs so he couldnt go anywhere.
"Yes, ma'am". Kayce gladly did as he was told.  He lined himself up and pushed in. God, he stretched you in all the right places.
"Fuck, baby". Kayce mumbled into your skin of your chest. He started kissing along your collarbone, kissing your neck.
Kayce picked up his pace and his  thrusts were deep and long. His hands resting on your back.
"I love you. I'm sorry for being jealous". Kayce spoke between kisses and thrusts.
"I forgive you". You kissed his chest and nibbled at his ear lobe. "I love you so much. Fuck". You threw your head back into the bed when Kayce thrusted in the right angle. God, did he know your body or what.
"You gonna cum again"? Kayce chuckled as he felt you start to squeeze his cock. You let out a whimper and a nod.
"Cum for daddy". Those words sent you straight to the stars. Your orgasm exploded around Kayce. His cock still thrusting as your orgasm still fired away. He was close. So close. Your walls were milking him.
"Fuck". Kayce grunted, his head fell to your chest as he came. His hot seed covered your walls. You wrapped your arms around him and held him as both your orgasms exhausted both of you. You laid there until he went soft and he pulled out of you. Getting under the covers, Kayce pulled you into his arms with a kiss to your sweaty forehead.
"I'm truly sorry that I always let my jealousy get in the way of our relationship. I'm going to work on that. Because I know you would never cheat on me". Kayce said as he cuddled you in more.
"I would never cheat on you, ever. Especially after that. Holy fuck that was amazing. You definitely out did yourself there Mr. Dutton". You giggled, moving a piece of hair from his face.
Kayce chuckled. "You'll have my sister to thank for that. She told me what you wanted".
"So you did talk to Beth and found out that I'm a good girl". You teased.
"I know that's a lie. But I know that you want me and I want you. I was just being bullheaded. I'm sorry".
"I forgive you. Now". You cleared your throat. "How bad are your ribs hurting"?
"Not to bad. Why"? Kayce eyed you.
"I want a ride again, cowboy". You pushed him on his back and climbed aboard the Kayce train. You were never getting off no matter how jealous Kayce was or how angry you were about it. You both loved each other and that wasn't going to change.
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cheelduh · 3 years
Note
hii, could i request just a crumb of fluff for diluc and a very shy/wallflower reader (especially if it could be more crush/mutual pining focused if thats fine)? 👉👈 thank you 🥺
Nothing Else
Pairing: Diluc x gn!reader
Warnings: Spelling mistakes prolly :( fluff!
Words: 850
Synopsis: Diluc looks forward to seeing you everyday, because deep down he perceives you as his biggest epiphany, that someone could seamlessly make room for themselves in his unpredictable world, to take him by the heart and never let go.
Note: Sorry I took so long to complete this!
He's distracted. It's something that you notice almost immediately. It's only one hour into his shift, yet he's fatigued like he is during closing time.
Something isn't right.
You observe him quietly, discreetly, careful not to wane his momentum.
It's an injury. Somewhere that's easily irritated, because as he continues there's a barely notable grimace. This isn't exactly shocking to you, because you know he's ought to be injured after his nightly escapades, which he tries to conceal from everyone including you.
He looks the same as ever when pouring drinks, except his body is taut in stiffness, recoiling when there's a glass in his hand, sensitive.
It's his palm.
When the rush time disseminates as the time goes by, at long last giving him time to breathe. Your breath stills, hesitance brewing in the thick of your skin. It's your chance.
"Diluc." Your voice is barely above a whisper, but he hears you regardless. He always does.
He approaches you, a soft smile playing at his lips. Something he doesn't even try to hide from you anymore, and it's enough to kindle a flame in your heart, joining the dust of cherry on your cheeks.
"Another drink?" Diluc's gloved hand reaches for your cup. Even so, you stop him by gently enfolding your hand on his wrist, halting further movement.
It takes him by surprise, a pleasant one at that. It's messy, his heart beat, increasing with speed by the second. Before he can truly appreciate the touch, your hand is already gone, the moment ebbing into a new memory. One that both of you will cherish, unknowing of the feelings the other one holds.
"I'm—I'm sorry," You stammer, voice dripping in doubt, then reach for something in your bag. "I just—I couldn't help but notice that you were in pain."
He raises a brow. "Pain?"
Stillness. Until you fluidly push a tinted, compact glassed bottle his way. "Your palms are irritating you are they not?"
It's common for claymore wielders. The overuse sometimes forms small, painful little blisters, and the gloves act as a catalyst to further aggravate the skin. It's nothing more than an insignificant annoyance to Diluc, so why does it matter so much to you?
Diluc controls his neutral expression, but his red ears hold another story, blending in with his hair. He's staring at the bottle too long.
"It's a salve," You explain shyly, mistaking his hesitation for confusion. "Liyuean. It should soothe the burning?" It sounds like a question, but that's only because you don't know how much longer you'll be able to keep this conversation going, especially with the ringing in your ears and the compression of your heart.
You burn under his gaze, fidgeting with your sleeves when you turn away.
He snaps out of his daze, grabbing the ointment, mentally berating himself from taking too long to answer.
"Thank you." He says, and you miss the tenderness held in his voice due to the erratic palpitations in your veins.
You let out a soft mhm as a reply, shoving your books in your bag.
Diluc pockets the bottle swiftly, panics a bit at your impeding departure. Worries that he's made you distressed with his aloof persona. "I—leaving so soon? I can fix you another drink if you'd like?"
You shake your head at him, sending him a genuine, close-eyed smile. "I'd love to. But I'm afraid if I don't leave now my brother's going to ruin your floors."
As if on cue, your brother stumbles through a body of people, half of his body folding over the counter as he sticks up two fingers.
"Four more drinks please!" He claims, all red in the face.
Diluc's not impressed.
You seize your brother by the arm, tugging him away from the bar top to avoid further embarrassment. "Time to go home."
Using all your weight to push your drunk brother outside the door. You stop momentarily, as if forgetting something.
The golden hues of the lantern reflect themselves in the whirls of your hair while you run back to the counter, biting your lips in contemplation. Then you take a deep breath.
For the first time, you don't waver when you stare into his eyes with another kind of determination. "Please take care of yourself. You can't help people if you don't help yourself first!"
Diluc's heart immediately stops, and he thanks the Archons it's Kaeya's off day, else the mischievous cavalry captain would've caught his near-loss of composure. Would've teased him relentlessly too.
There's nothing else to say, but he doesn't want to let you go. Not without conveying something, anything at all. Just to reassure you, to articulate a semblance of his feelings.
But Diluc isn't the best at expressing himself, he never has been. He wants to be, but until the second he's able to do so properly, with words of intimacy that you deserve, he opts for something elementary in the meantime, something that lasts till your next encounter.
"I look forward to your visit tomorrow, Y/N.”
When you wave a final goodbye, and take your exit with a hidden grin, Diluc softens.
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ablackfangirlwrites · 3 years
Text
Jealous ll
Part 2!!!! I linked the sone again cause its a bop and I love it also heres pt one!
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You had had enough
Thats what you kept telling yourself
As you got ready tonight
You weren't going sit in the house anymore waiting for keigo to show up whenever he felt like it
Tonight you were going out for you
You thought about how you used to have fun, how you used to be happy
And how miserable you had been lately and you decided
If Keigo didnt appreciate you anymore
Then you'd find someone who would
So thats why you found yourself looking in the mirror admiring how well you dressed up tonight to go out
You almost forgot how hot you were when you put in a little effort
You had originally stopped because keigo would tell you how beautiful and perfect you were without make up or anything
But now you were on the prowl for someone new to notice you and keigo's words meant little to nothing to you right now
Tonight you were gonna find someone to show you just a little bit of attention you craved so much and it wasnt going to be keigo
Just then you saw keigo staring at you from the reflection in mirror
he was home unusually eailer
"Dont you have to work?" You asked bitterly
"Where are you going?" He asked ignoring your statement
Sighed and rolling your eyes and picking up your purse you turned to him before leaving the bedroom, "Out. You don't have to wait up for me."
"You're being ridiculous y/n."
He said following you but you ignored him
"Y/n? Y/n?" He kept calling you, "You cant just go out an-"
"And why not?" You turned to him before you left the apartment, "according to you were not even really dating-"
"You know why that is." He told you seriously
You huffed out a fake laugh, "yeah, but its still okay for you to flirt with anyone?"
Keigo didnt respond to that making you chuckle, "Exactly...like I said im going out dont wait up." Then you slammed the door leaving.
You knew you were being unreasonable with him
You knew the two of you needed to just talk and make up
But you kept letting your anger from all your arguments cloud your judgment
Because you just wanted him to feel the same hurt and jealously you had been feeling more then anything
Keigo stared at the door you had just slammed
Things somehow got worse in the following days after your argument on your anniversary
You refused to talk to him
He tried to apologize to you but you basically brushed him off
Keigo wasn't sure what to think you said you hated him, you wouldnt sleep in the bed with him
Yet you hadn't packed up and left so that was good right?
But that distance that was growing between the two of you was wider then before
And he didnt know what to do to fix it
And now you were going out clearly dressed to find someone else
Did you really hate him? Had you really had enough of him?
Hell, he couldnt even blame you if you did he thought
You had put up with so much of him up until now
And maybe some of what you said the other night was true? Had he gotten too comfortable with you always being there?
But that was only because he loved you
Keigo was truly in love with you, and dispite you suspensions he never cheated on you
And he would never do that, you were the only one he wanted even now when you two seemed to be at each others throats
He still wanted you, and he couldn't picture his life without you
So thats why he ended up following you to the bar you were currently at
He made sure you hadnt noticed him staying in the back out of your sight
And he hated what he saw
He saw you having fun
You had met up with some of your girlfriends the three of you all laughing and drinking
You acting like you didnt have a care in the world, like the two of you didnt argue before you left out
Having a good time as if you didnt leave him alone in the house
He watched you dancing as though you were having the time of your life as other mean stared and gawked at you
He watched as a guy singled you out and was clearly flirting with you
And worst you let him and was encouraging him
You kept touching his shoulder laughing at his jokes letting him dance against you
Words couldnt describe the irritation he felt watching
He wanted nothing more then to rip that mans hands off you and fly away with you in his arms
But part of him felt like he deserved this
This feeling he had, was it how you felt?
If so he needed to fix this, was all that he could think
And he was about to go to you, but before he could someone called out his name
"Hey! Hawks is here!"
Fuck he said to himself when a crowd started to form around him
His eyes then connected with yours knowing you heard he was here
And for a moment he thought you were gonna come up to him
But instead you kept talking to the random guy ignoring him
Hawks wanted to go to you and talk to just take you back home
But was having trouble getting away from the crowd
He was all smiles talking to his fans but the whole time he kept his eyes on you
But somehow it became a battle to see who was going to be more stubborn
You continued to dance with the random guy, but now you knew keigo was here watching you
You convinced yourself not to care, you came here to have fun and he wasnt going to ruin it for you
But thats just what he was doing as you watched him talk to some random girl now
He was here to get under you skin, you were sure of it
But two could play this little game
Both of you having this little war with each other watching each other from across the room
And you couldnt lie you were enjoying it a bit
Seeing his eyes watching you, knowing he had to be feeling the sting of jealousy as another man held you close
But It all came to a head when you saw the girl he was dancing with lips on his neck
He wasnt looking at you when you saw that all his attention clearly on her
You couldn't deny the sharp feeling in your chest at the sight
And not wanting to see anymore you left the dance floor telling the guy you needed to go to the bathroom
Hawks pulled away from the handsy fan
Denying anymore of her advances
Yeah he had been trying to get under your skin now but thats was a bit much
But now when he looked up to find you again, only to see you were gone
His stomach sank
Where did you go? You had to had just seen that?
Did you leave with that guy? Hawks started to panic when he didnt seem him either
Where did you go? Why was he being so stupid just now? He should have just went to talk to you
Just then keigo noticed the guy you had been flirting with at the bar and went up to him
"The girl you were dancing with? Where'd she go?"
The guy looked at him like he was crazy "whats it too you?" He challenged him
But keigo wasnt in a playful mood and grabbed the man by the collar, "Answer the question asshole."
The guy quickly put his hands up in defeat, "she just said-
"Hawks?"
He heard his name called out and looked behing him to see you
"What are- you are so unbelievable." Yku shook your head storming off
You couldn't believe him he had the audacity to attack the guy you had been talking to
It didnt take much thought to figure out why
And it annoyed you to no end
So keigo could flirt and let girls kiss all over him but if you had a guy around you that was too much
He was such a hypocrite
You were angry your whole way back home
You stood in the mirror once you got back
But with a different feeling in your stomach then the feeling you had before you left
You felt defeated your plans of fun had been ruined and you felt like your back in the same spot you had been in
Hawks was giving you a little bit of space taking his time getting back home
Because now you were probably madder than before at him
When hr got in he saw you had just got out the shower
"Y/n..."
You heard him call out your name But you ignored him
Y/n, you have to listen to me."
You werent going to turned around but before you knew it he hugged you from behind
"Im sorry."
"Let go of me hawks." You spat out but he didnt budge
"Just listen to me y/n..."
"Why are we doing this to each other?" You asked quietly, "Why do you keep hurting me? What are we even doing? It clearly isnt wor-"
"Ive been an idiot, y/n."
Keigo buried his face in your neck, "I've been so stupid, but please please dont leave me."
You were trying to fight back tears, "I dont want to leave you keigo....but I cant-"
"Dont say you can't with me anymore. I need you." Keigo pleaded holding you tighter
You were so frustrated
You still loved him, you still wanted to be with him, because when things are good between you they're great
But the way your relationship had been it was becoming too much
But you wanted to stay with him
Because you loved him
You moved your hands and held on to his arms secretly enjoying his embrace that you missed so much
"I know you mean well keigo-"
"I love you so much y/n," keigo cut you off again, "I know ive been an asshole, ive been neglectful, ive been the worst, but dont give up on me. Please."
You finally turned around to face him and hugged him back
You could see the sincerity in his eyes as you did "I love you too keigo but I just cant do this- we keep hurting each other...thats not what your supposed to do to the people you love."
Keigo pulled back "You want me to tell everyone about us? I will." He told you, "You want me to tell you everything ive been doing I will, I promise you Ill to whatever it takes to fix us. I dont want to live the way we have anymore."
You knew he was serious and your heart leaped hearing his words but you werent sure
"You're the only one I want y/n" he said giving you a light kiss
Almost like he was asking for permission
"Ill do whatever it takes for you to forgive me."
He said inbetween kisses, "you're so important to me, im sorry i made you think you weren't."
You couldnt lie he was finally saying everything you wanted to hear
And you wanted to believe him
"You promise?" You asked him
"I promise."
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thekillingjoke-haha · 3 years
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Angel With A Shotgun
Summary: The Novak family was big talk,but not nearly as famous as the L/n’s. Togther they can be unstoppable,so what say family ties like guns,drugs,money,and murder?
Paring: Michael!Dean x Male!Reader
1900's Mafia/Gangsters AU
A/N: this is a Micheal fic,but its him in Dean's body so like...idk its the same snake different skin. Also Chuck is referred as Charles
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Warning:Blood,guns,knives,gore,torture,swearing. Homophobic comments like just a few. No proof reading
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The Novak's that a family that was one of the most feared yet respected. The way people talk about them down south you'd think they were inspiration for the Bible itself. A man by Charles or Chuck Novak is the head honcho with five sons to help him run is kingdom.
The youngest is Castiel he was probably the nicest of all his siblings,but also the most protected with three other brothers, Gabriel is the definition of trouble and if he slipped up head could easily get lynched good thing he puts that silver tongue to work. Raphael was one of the more head strong,but sadly he was shot when several rivals attacked at on of their bars. Lucifer is the second oldest and the most hot headed with a temper to match the black sheep in his family if you will, then last,but not least Michael he was something else entirely the play boy,a demon is a flat cap and tailored suit.Now that the Novak's have been introduced the world's most feared gang the L/n's is one family not to be fucked with.
(Father's name) leading his kingdom no...empire with his wife (Mother's name) and togther they had only two sons. The second born William and the oldest M/n. William wasn't much involved with the criminal side of the business,but his big brother was the prime example of a gangster. No one besides the L/n gang has seen him he stays out of newspaper coverage and that only allows his terror to run ramped. A man with no face and a title of Satan himself made the oldest Novak just a little timid when he found out. "WHAT THE HELL!!!" Michael threw the newspaper on his fathers desk in anger the older man looked up after glancing at the paper. "I'm due to be wed to a L/n and none the less a man! I can be hanged for so much as saying I do and it IN THE FUCKING BULLETIN!!!" He was seething with hatred in every word. Michael will admit it hurt a lot finding out he was to be wed by the slight disgust look he got while grabbing the paper before getting coffee. "I wanted to tell you sooner,but you were handling something. There's no way out of this a deal was made before you were born me and (Father's name) have been waiting for his wife to bare a girl or your mother to do the same,but your mother's untimely passing and (Mother's name) having gone unfertial our oldest are due to wed." Chuck sighed taking off his thin wired glasses.
"You two were once friends,but I guess time got rid of those memories." Chuck sat down his spectacles down looking at his son. Michael turned to father with shock evident in his eyes. He was friends with M/n L/n the man with no face. Everything was too foggy. The shorter male stood up to a shelf in the office and grabbed a small match box opening it looking around before pulling out a picture. Handing it over to his son he sat back down. "He was one of the only people you'd go to when you were a baby. Heavens he was probably the only person you liked,but when he was five and you were three the fact that our business was centered around blood and there's on bonds it became a fight,mafia versus a gang, and you guys saw eachother less and less till around the time Luci was born not at all." Chuck sighed. The young man was in shock a little boy maybe two or three was cuddled up to a baby in a pale blanket that he remembered was blue fully awake and if the picture could come to life he's sure the boy was humming all while rubbing the infants back.
"No ones seen a picture of him in twenty six years and he was on his fathers hip with a match box car. He's in town and should be coming for dinner here by himself in three days time. So til then keep your brothers in check we don't need them to shoot the young man with a stray bullet." With that Charles dismissed his eldest son as the green eyed boy stormed off in a huff. Michael started to do digging. M/n L/n was in headlines weekly in every post known to man from shootings,assassination,and gangbanding to rumors of his love-life,what he wears,and people claiming to have met him. One thing caught his eye that made him falter. "Gangsters M/n L/n Captures Murderer" that when he started reading the full paper that crumbled a bit due to age. Maybe he's not so bad the guy he caught never saw a courtroom,but met a far worse end all because he caused problems with his people. It was admirable the brunette knew he'd do the same,but not just for anybody. Marriage wasn't settling well with him that didn't mean it felt completely wrong.
One day later
Looking in the mirror Michael watched as his maid adjusted his tie while another smoothed the wrinking in his white button up and vest of his three piece suit. As the oldest he had business to handle people to keep in line. When their hands left his body they scurried out of the room rushing to be down stairs before him. His dress shoes met the floor as he grew closer to the door his youngest sibling ran up next to him. "Can I come,please!" His raven head of hair and doe blue eyes almost made him cave,but with a firm look he gazed down at him. "Sorry little raven,but I have things to handle another time." The pout on Castiel lip didn't move as he held up his hand his pinky out. "Promise?" Interlocking with the ten year olds pinky. "Promise." With that he happily skipped away to play in the garden.
Out the door he went. His flat came on his head and coat thrown over his shoulder his effects tucked in his waistband. Screams caused him to smile as he stood before the butcher on payroll. He wore the man's leather apron having abandoned his tailored suit jacket in the front of the deil. "Were is my money?" He cut the man some more as he continued to scream in pain the white fire from the rusted meat hook in his shoulder flaring with each jerked motion. "Help please!" He yelled all of a sudden in the past hour he hasn't called for assistance. "No can do." A deep voice said behind the oldest Novak turning around sharply his green eyes clashed with e/c. The man looked like anyone off the street his shoes tattered and clothing dirty form labor no bet. "I came for my five notes." The didn't seem fazed at the torture. "Fuck you gypsy scum!!" The pig of a man responded as the tall s/c man crept closer gripping a knife Michael was using. "I just unloaded a load of meat in the summer heat that would give the devil a sweat and all I asked for my effort was five notes nothing more nor less so cough of the money that you clearly owe both of us or I'll carve it out of you and make you squeal like the piggy bank you are." His tone dropped further the blade under the man's fat chin and the Novak felt aroused at the threat. This guy meant every word when the hanging man spat in his face the off color of snuff and blood made the normally clear liquid seen and thick. Let's just say Michael sat back crossing his legs in a attempt to compose himself as the man hit pitches not even the girls in the church choir could master. The heavy weight man forked over the money then some I got my full and he ended up giving the mystery man a hundred notes if he made the pain stop after pocketing the money he shot the man.
He turned around and began to leave when the brunette stopped him. "Wait! I give you my thanks friend he was stubborn for a hour almost" The h/c man turned looking at him giving a smile tilting his head for the Novak to follow as he stepped out the deli. Scrambling he walked down the street next to the man their attire clashing a well tailored suit next to rags that looked more like a potato sack then cloth. "Glad I could help a fine looking fella like yourself." His flirtatious grin caused butterflies to run ramped in Michael's guts. As they walked down the street they slowly moved from the good side of the town to the slums. No cars drove on the gravel a fire hydrine spat out water for all the children playing around it,women hung up clothes on wire between tenements and men looked more like the mysterious gypsy next to the Novak. Speaking of the mystery man he went to each crowded tenements door and knocked the women or young men of the families came to the door and he handed over twenty notes each. The women cried and clung to his tall figure and the boys almost men looked at him in wonder like a hero before running off to tell the adults of the place. "Why did you do that?" Michael asked as they walked out of the town. "You worked for that money and gave it all away." He was confused he's never seen a man work for a family that wasn't his own.
"They need it more. Schools out the children don't get meals and the men work hard to feed them at least a meal a day. I'm alone here no lover or children with the energy and muscle to work." Novak wasn't sure before,but he was sure now this was love and it felt better then any harlot he could spend the night with. "Thats very admirable of you." Michael complmented which was not a normal accuracy. "It was truly nothing to admire,handsome. I'm not saying I'm amazing,but sometimes I'm decently above average. That's what people need someone decent enough go care."
Before he knew it they were back on his side of town and getting closer to the business. "It's been a pleasure,Mr. Novak." The man dripped his head as he turned to leave somewhere. "You know who I am and I don't even get a name." He turned back around and got closer to him his chest pushed up against his till he was pinned to the wall he leaned down his lips so close to his face just out of reach. "I'm N/n,but you can call me the man of your dreams." Michael almost leaned up to peak his lips when the warm body pulled away taking with it the lust filled tension. N/n turned and left out of sight that night was full of the man tossing and turning dreaming of the e/c man that made him feel high as the clouds above. N/n smiled as his men drank around him he finally saw his baby boy all grown up and he's taking what's his this time.
Two days later=Six Hours Before Family Dinner
The buzz of the New Yorker coming to Kansas was the rage. Any man that was new in town was watched like a hawk by commoners and the Novak's. Michael was no longer looking forward to this marriage he didn't want this man no matter who he was. N/n stole his heart like a petty thief and ran away from him. No one in Kansas knew who he was a s/c skinned,h/c haired,e/c eyed gypsy was all he had to go on no last name just a image that burned bright in his mind. Michael sighed as he left his office and went down to the bank he needed enough cash on hand to throw away on booze and maybe angel dust. People parted for him like the red sea and he easily got money when gun shots went off. The teller in front of him fell to the ground wounds ridding his body and Novak turned to see men...no boys with guns.
"Everyone get down on the ground. We've come only for the money we won't hesitate for blood as well." The group chuckled as the leader smirked people shook as they easied to the ground all except Michael who stood tall. "Ah! If it isn't Michael Novak no men to protect you now." A man he didn't realize came behind him hit him over the head with his gun causing him to fall to his knees. "Pathetic." The band of thugs leader grabbed the Mafia bosses chin looking and the blood coming from his brow. Someone stood from on their knees a flat cap covering their hair and a long trench coat that was only slightly open. "It would be in your best interest to leave,boys." They all train their guns at the man. "Why's that,you motherless bastered?" The man turned his gaze upward deadly sharp e/c orbs looked at him and Michael was in shock it was N/n. "Cause I have twelve guns ready to blow holes in you and your men." After his words ten men stood up all wearing the same clothing flat caps,overcoats,and suspenders with a Tommy on every man except the leader. The cowardly man looked frightened looking around keeping his gun on the s/c man. "I only count ten I still have the upper hand." N/n gave a devilish smile that made Michelle gaze on love struck and excited for what's to come. His gray trench coat hit the floor and two sawed-off shotguns in each hand. "Upper hand you say?" He pulled both triggers the left one killing the man sending himself flying back and the right killing the man behind Michael blowing his brains painting the tan walls this made the others fire as well. The bodies of the criminals and one civilian litter the floor.
N/n sent the men off to get the people out as he walked up to the bleeding Novak. "Thank you." His green eyes gleamed making the standing man give a grin as he held his hand out to help him up. "Consider it a gift from M/n L/n." The gleam disappeared from his eyes his soon to be husband was in town has been in town and set his men up to keep him safe. "Now if I'm not mistaken you have a dinner to get ready for,pretty boy." He takes the handkerchief out of his waist coat dabbing the blood away. "Will you be there?" Michael voice sounded weak so full of hope. "You can count on it. We'll be seeing eachother alot more." The man stood up and quickly left and not a moment later Mafia men came in running tending to the boss. Looking longingly at the piece of cloth (Your Initials) were sowed into the reddend white square of fabric.
Family Dinner was about to start the Novak's sat at the table Charles sitting at the end his three eldest sons to his right while his youngest sat to the left two spots were available one across from Michael and the other on the opposite end of Charles. A maid came in the dinning hall and cleared her throat. "The L/n's are here." Two young men came through the door one taller then the other the shorter of the two sat across from Michael while the other sat at the other end of the table closest to Michael and the other man. Charles smiled at them both and Michael was in a state of shock. "M/n been a long while hasn't it?" The oldest Novak looked at the man infront of him waiting for a response when the man he thought to be just a gangster working under the L/n's answered. "That it has Chuck. Sorry father couldn't come he had some other business to handle." N/n or M/n now to Michael's knowledge said before placing a hand on the man beside him. "This is Benjamin or Benny my right hand man don't mind him." The man gave a nod of acknowledgment his blue eyes piercing. "Heard about the blood bath at the bank quite impressive from what Michael has told me." A side smile and a teasing look was turned the mentioned Novak's way. "Saw low life scum trying to rob the place and touching what's mine,their little toys they call guns were child's play compared to my men." M/n sent a wink addressing the men hitting Michael from behind.
"Are you a knight that saves people?" The youngest asked his blue eyes wide in wonder. The s/c males eyes turned to the child a warm smile gracing his lips. "Sometimes when I want to be." A bubbly giggle rang out. "You saved Mikey making him your prince." Those words caused different reactions from all the men. Gabe covered his mouth trying not to laugh at his older brother,Lucifer grinned leaning over to his brother. "Did he have to kiss you sleeping beauty?" He chuckled lowly making kissing noises in his ear,Micheal was beet red as he couldn't bear to face any of them,Chuck smiled looking at his son and son-in-law,Benny nudged his boss sliding something to him while everyone was distracted. "Yeah and I'm gonna make him my king and take him to my castle." M/n leaned towards the boy and whispered in his ear. "We'll ride off into the sunset and live happily ever after." Castiel was gobsmacked as he gazed at his brother all giddy he was gonna live a fairy tale like in all the books their mother use to read. "Um if you'll excess me. I need some air." Micheal stood up and not long after M/n followed when given a reassuring nod from Charles.
The garden of the estate was beautiful in the moonlight and it wasn't hard to spot the oldest Novak on a bench on looking the pond that reflected the night sky. "You knew the whole time who I was." Micheal didn't look up at the man as he sighed. "Yes I knew who you were...we were once closer then the stars and the skies itself." The L/n sat next to him on the bench looking forward. "Chuck knew as well." Michelle turned in shock at that statement a goose chase for nothing. "He didn't know what I looked like now,but letters everyday asking about you seemed to do the trick." Those e/c eyes turned to look into those apple green ones. "Learning from a young age that in you grasp was the person you were due to wed was shocking I almost hated you,but the moment you grabbed my finger as if I'd slip away made me realize it can't be so bad." M/n held out his hand palm up so the younger male rested his hand in his grasp. "I was afraid at first you'd hate me. So I swore to protect you always. Some of my men live here with their families and they keep me posted. Just last year a rat was found on you door step admitting his faults."
Micheal remembered that the maids came rushing to get the family and a man bloody and beaten spilled his guts about planning to cross the family having been hired by a rival Mafia to get information to attack them at a weak state. "I know this won't mean munch to you know,but maybe at some point you'll be happy to carry my last name and call yourself my husband." In M/n hand that wasn't interlocked with Micheal's he opened a box revealing two wedding bands both were silver while one had a gold trim and the other had a f/c trim. "No matter what,Novak,I'll be there when yiu need me through it all most of the times guns blazing." M/n chuckled lightly taking in a deep breath. "Just ponder on it,pretty boy,I'llbe here waiting." as he slipped the ring on the silent man's finger before doing the same with himself he gently kissed the top of his head as he stood up and left wanting to give him space. Micheal smiled at the ring that perfectly fit his finger. The one man he felt attracted to was his guardian angel always there no matter what.
Lifting his hand up he kissed the metal band as a laugh left his lips. "My angel with a shotgun."
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A/n: Second Male reader and I had to spell check for almost 50 she/her in her so I think I got them all lol.
@spnquotebingo
Quote: "I'm not saying I'm amazing,but I'm decently above average."-Blacklist @spnquotebingo
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dameronology · 3 years
Text
best friend {javier pena x reader}
summary: after finally calling it a day on a bad relationship, you turn to javier for comfort
warnings: mentions of alcohol + smoking, swearing
i was listening to best friend by rex orange county when i was writing this so i guess it’s loosely based on it? it’s definitely where the title came from. i hope you enjoy!
- jazz
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Javier hated pulling all nighters - he especially hated them when it was Friday. Everyone else at the office was either going out to drink or going home to spend the evening with their families. The sounds of music and laughter that surrounded the outside of the DEA offices only acted as a reminder of how lonely he’d become; because, even if Colombia was the source of much of his grief, for others, it was their home. Their happiness and their life. Both of which, these days, seemed to be things he struggled to find
That wasn’t to say that his life completely lacked enrichment. Between the antics of you and Murphy, and the progress you were all making towards capturing Escobar, things weren’t all that bad. Especially you. He didn’t entirely know what your presence in his life meant, but it was a hell of lot. It felt like he’d finally started to see his life in colour when you were assigned the desk beside his. Your energy and your wit enriched everything, even if 99% of your relationship consisted of taking swipes at one another, 
If there was one thing he was grateful on nights like these, it was that the DEA apartment building wasn’t too far from the office. Murphy had clearly gotten home hours ago, because his car was in his spot and the lights to his unit at the front of the complex were dimmed. Your own vehicle was a few spaces over from Javi’s, terribly parked (as per usual) and barely between the white lines. At least he could take comfort in the fact that both his friends had made it home safe.
Or, you’d at least made it the front steps of the building. 
Javier almost did a double take when he saw you, a half-burnt cigarette in one hand and a completely empty bottle of wine in the other. You were slumped against the railings, eyes glued to the floor in front of you. He knew had it been a rough week - there had been a lot of bloodshed and not a lot of progress - but he hadn’t realised it had been that bad. And you would have told him, right? You told him everything. Literally everything. Probably more than you told your own damn boyfriend (who he hated - not that it was important). 
‘Jesus.’ Javi didn’t bother to offer you a greeting. 
You looked up at a him, a hazy smile playing on your face when your eyes met. ‘Agent Pena! How are you doing?’
‘You never call me that. I hate it.’ He muttered, dropping onto the stairs beside you. ‘Please don’t tell me you drove home like this.’
‘God, no.’ You snorted. ‘I drove home then went to a bar with Tom.’
‘How is he?’
‘Him? Yeah, we broke up.’ You casually shrugged. ‘So then I brought some wine and realise I left my keys.’
‘Oh, honey.’ Javi murmured. ‘I’m sorry.’
‘Don’t give me that, Jav.’ You elbowed him slightly. ‘I know you hated him.’
‘Guilty as charged.’
Javier stood up, moving the bottle aside and sticking his hand out to you. He didn’t exactly relate to what you were going through. Mostly because he didn’t get into relationships, or that he was always the one to end them. He hadn’t really known heartbreak in the conventional sense. Sure, he’d felt a pang in his chest when you first introduced him to your now ex just over a year ago, but that wasn’t loss. It was just..something he didn’t want to think about. It was a can of worms he’d been pretty good at keeping shut, and he was not going to start sorting through it at 1AM. He was far from drunk (unlike some people) but hours and hours of paperwork and chain smoking had fogged his brain. Right then, you needed a friend, and that was something he could be. Though you hadn’t shared all that much emotion together - mostly just careless banter and harmless teasing - your jobs had bonded you for life. You’d certainly witnessed a lot of twisted things, and it meant that you and Murphy were the only two people in the world who truly understood the kind of thing he dealt with. And, with all due respect to Murphy, you got on Javi’s nerves a fuck ton less. 
You tangled your fingers with his, letting him drag you up off the steps. Stumbling for a moment, you gripped onto his shirt for balance. It felt like somebody had taken a baseball bat to your head and to your stomach. Whether you wanted to chunder or faint first, you didn’t know. The only thing you could think about was the warm arms wrapping around your waist, and the feeling of Javier’s body being flush against yours as he pulled you against his side and guided you into the building. 
‘Where do you think you left your keys?’ He gently asked. He didn’t say anything when you slumped further against him, all your energy staying solely on walking and not falling. 
‘Thabar.’ You murmured.
‘Huh?’
‘The bar.’ You repeated. ‘I’ll go back in the morning. It’s fine.’
‘I don’t think you’ll be awake before midday.’ Javi chided. 
He held you there for a moment, fumbling about for his own keys, before kicking open the apartment door.
His place wasn’t bad, but it didn’t feel that far off of a show apartment, or the window of an Ikea. It was identical to yours, except you’d actually made yours homier. Javi’s, meanwhile, looked exactly as it had the day he’d moved in. None of the furniture had moved, and the television had probably been turned on a total of twice. Whilst your place was covered in photos and personally belongings, his was filled with bottles of whiskey and strewn leather jackets. He did have one photo hanging on his fridge; it was a Polaroid of him, you and Murphy, chilling out at your favourite bar. You were in the middle of them, practically hanging off their arms with a grin on your face. Javier would never let either of you actually know how much you meant to him. He couldn’t deal with the teasing. 
The next few moments were a blur of you dropping onto his sofa, hitting the leather with a thump. He tossed a warm blanket over you, before helping you kick off your shoes and taking a seat beside you. With the alcohol making you more brazen than usual, you didn’t think twice about curling against his side, and Javier didn’t think twice about letting you. He knew better than anyone that sometimes, a hug was the best medicine - so, he tossed an arm over your shoulders, pulling you towards him in a similar manner to how he had done in the hallway. The smell of his aftershave was gentle, mixed with a faint smell of cigarettes and the mint hand cream he insisted he didn’t use. It was just...Javi. And you loved it. 
‘Do you wanna talk about it?’ Javi gently asked, thumb rubbing circles over the bare skin on your arm.
‘I dunno what there is to say.’ You murmured. ‘I saw it coming. I definitely saw it coming but I just...I thought he was it you know. I mean, you probably don’t know because the one for you is whiskey and cigarettes-’
‘- is this an attack on me or your ex?’ He joked. 
‘Right, sorry.’ You peered up at him through hooded eyes. ‘Just hurts, y’know? Because for all his flaws, he’s probably as good as I’m ever gonna get.’
‘That’s bullshit and you know it.’ He reminded you. ‘That man never deserved you.’
‘He wasn’t that bad, Jav.’
‘Remember all the times you were in a bad mood because he was late, or because he didn’t turn up to a date?’ His brown eyes flickered, staring at the blank wall ahead. He didn’t mean to overstep, or to be protective, but it was just that it you. And that was reason enough. 
‘He was trying his best.’
‘If that’s his best, then he’s in trouble.’ He snorted. 
You groaned, flopping further down into his chest. ‘It’s hopeless. I’m hopeless. I don’t need a man to survive but maybe thats why I get through them so quickly.’
‘You’re not the problem.’ Javi said. 
‘My mum always said I was too much to handle-’
‘-  you’re not.’ He cut you off. ‘If they think you’re too much, then they’re not worth your time.’
‘There’s seven billion people on the planet. There must be someone, right?’
‘You don’t need to find somebody. You’re more than enough on your own.’ He said. (What he meant to say was: you don’t need to find somebody, but it’s okay if you want me). 
‘I know.’ You murmured. 
A silence fell over you. Javier wasn’t entirely sure what to say, because every time he tried to go over the possibilities, it kept ending with him declaring that he was the one you should be with. It made sense logistically. 
You didn’t like to be looked after, but you always let him. You both had the same job, so you both understood the struggle. The spark between you two was fucking immense and there was always something to talk about. It was hard to find a single reason not to be together - except for timing. And timing was kind of everything, especially when there was so much at stake. How much of it you needed, he didn’t know. That wasn’t even calculating in the fact that it would take Javier at least thirty more cycles of convincing himself to tell you before he finally took the plunge. 
‘Thank you for helping me tonight.’ You sleepily mumbled. 
‘Always.’ Javier replied. 
‘I’m trying not to fall asleep on you-’
‘- go ahead.’ He cut you off with a soft chuckle. 
‘I appreciate you.’ 
That was the last thing you managed, before sleep completely overtook you. This was new ground for your friendship - physical touch, deep conversations, Javi teetering dangerously close on the precipice of enlightening you with his feelings. The bottom could even have the best landing ever, or the worst. Was it worth the risk? 
Javi peered down at you, completely enamoured at the sight of you quietly snoozy, hand splayed out on his chest and eyes screwed shut. This could be an everyday thing. Domesticity and closeness and you. He could feel his chest physically hurting at the feeling; at the prospect of having you. Like, actually having you. 
He pressed a soft kiss to your forehead, brown eyes flickering up to the ceiling. That was when he knew in his very soul, the answer to that question.
You were worth every risk.
332 notes · View notes
lupismaris · 3 years
Note
For the requests silver flint Hamilton adopting a cat?
(aahh i loved this thank you!!! it got a bit long so I’ve put most of it under a readmore but I hope you like it!)
Silverflintham in my general modern au.
******
“What’s this?” Silver asked, digging through the grocery bags that now littered the kitchen counter.
Flint was busy sorting through the day’s mail, tortoise shell reading glasses perched on his nose, brow furrowed as he read over a dinner invitation for himself and Thomas.
“What’s what?” he asked, tossing aside the invite and shuffling through bills.
Silver rolled his eyes and slid the stack of high end tins of cat food across the counter until it was in Flint’s line of sight. He knew that if he went down to the first floor he’d find a large bag of high end kibble to match, likely resting by the patio door.
Flint looked up, saw the cans, and snatched them off the counter. “Nothing. Just- for the shelter-“ he muttered as his ears started to burn.
“The shelter you send a check to once a month and whenever they ask?” Silver clarified, perching himself on the edge of the bar as Flint tucked the cans of food in the back of a cupboard. “That shelter?”
Flint scowled at him. “Yes for that shelter, they put out fliers asking for supplies alright? Figured I’d drop some off on my way to work tomorrow,” he snapped. There was very little bite to it, it was rare that Flint ever truly got annoyed with him.
“And it’s not for the slowly growing cat colony you totally aren’t feeding out in the alley each night?” Silver asked in a sweet voice.
He’d known about the stray cats in the neighborhood almost from the beginning of his relationship with Flint, how he’d keep a bag of food at the bar in case any of them came to the kitchen door, how according to Gates he’d managed to trap a few and get them to a rescue. He hadn’t found out about Flint’s unofficial colony of strays, however, until he had moved in. At present Silver guessed it was only a handful, four or five adult cats who were either content being feral or just waiting for the right home.
Flint liked to think he was subtle, that he wasn’t so obviously sneaking out each night before bed to leave food and water in the alley, to make sure the little cat boxes another neighbor had built were in tact. Silver let him believe it, though he couldn’t be sure whether or not Thomas knew about his husband’s unbearably endearing hobby.
Silver laughed softly at the flustered and indignant look on Flint’s face, the flush in his cheeks making his freckles turn ruddy. He reached for his hand. Flint took it without hesitation.
“It’s kitten season,” he said softly, not meeting Silver’s eye, “and that always means a few more strays on the streets. The little ones need different food, more calories so they put on the proper weight. That’s all.”
Of course Flint would be thinking about the kittens. Of course. God Silver had fallen in love with a truly ridiculous, wonderful man.
“I’m only teasing. You’re awful sweet,” he said, pulling Flint in for a kiss. It was enough to soothe Flint’s bristly demeanor, though he was still a bit flustered when he pulled away with a muttered ‘am not.’
Silver hooked his arms around Flint’s middle and tucked his face into his neck, purring slightly when Flint leaned into him and went back to sorting the mail. “You are. Don’t worry I won’t tell anyone. Your husband might though.”
Flint huffed a laughed and kissed Silver’s curls. “Oh without a doubt. Speaking of, he home yet?”
Home, that was still taking some getting used to.
“No but he did say he’d be a bit late today, last minute student meetings or something.” Silver said against Flint’s throat, pausing to mouth a bit at the hinge of his jaw. He could feel the vibration of Flint’s soft rumble of content and he nipped the soft skin below his ear.
“Well dinner won’t take long, I can fridge the duck for now, wait till it’s closer to supper time.” Flint’s voice held a note of mischief to it. “I’m sure we can think of something to entertain us in the mean time.”
Silver smiled against Flint’s throat, lifting his head to kiss him. “Oh I have a few ideas.”
Flint chuckled into the kiss, pulling back despite Silver’s whine of protest. “I’m sure you do. Help me finish the chores, pup, and you can tell me just what kind of ideas you have hm?”
As if Silver could say no to Flint, in his reading glasses and half buttoned shirt, his hair pulled back in a messy bun so the well trimmed undercut was visible.
They got the groceries put away, the ingredients for dinner prepped and stowed in the fridge, the duck legs braising in the oven, and when Silver thought he’d finally be able to get Flint at least to the sofa to make out like twenty year olds, Flint instead asked him to follow him down to the garden.
He took Silver out to see where he left the food for the cats, no longer keeping up the old pretenses that he was keeping it secret. Three of the cats were lingering in the alley when they stepped out of the back gate, a big black bruiser of a cat with a clipped ear and a few scars on his muzzle. He didn’t like silver one bit but he went right up to Flint as if greeting an old and cherished friend. The other two were younger, long haired domestics Silver would’ve guessed.
“Those two are brothers I think,” Flint told him, as the one with a white belly and rusty brown spots came over to inspect Silver, the other with tabby markings watching warily. “They’re new, oddly friendly, which means they likely had a home first.”
“Poor things,” Silver murmured, letting the two cats inspect his hands. He noted that they didn’t have their ears tagged. “Are they much younger than the others?”
“Probably only a year or so old, I’d guess. I was waiting for them to get a bit bigger before trying to take them to a rescue, so they can get fixed and all their shots and stuff. I could trap them rather easily I think but the closest shelter is overwhelmed right now.”
Silver nodded, setting out a bowl of food for them to share. “This explains all those random scratches you keep coming home with,” he said flatly, relishing the way it made Flint laugh.
Half an hour passed and Bruiser, as Silver now called him, trotted off to do whatever it was stray cats did. The brothers were happily playing with each other, tumbling and rough housing down the alley.
“You know, I’m surprised you haven’t just…” Silver mulled over his words as he and Flint went back inside, pulling the garden gate closed behind him. He was too focused on Flint, and his own thoughts, to double check if the latch had caught properly.
“Brought them inside?” Flint offered.
“Yeah. I’ve only just met them and I find myself considering how to convince Thomas we should adopt them. Well, I dunno if Bruiser wants to be adopted but the others-“
Flint shrugged, leading the way up the back stairs to the deck that extended from the back of the kitchen, leaving the glass door cracked a little to let in the cooler evening air. “Between you and me, Bruiser is about a week away from being adopted by the little old lady on the next block. I was seeing him less and less and got worried but it turns out shes got a whole set up for him. I’m sure it won’t be long before she gets him inside and he refuses to leave. The others though… I dunno I guess I’ve always had strays and never an actual cat. We had them back in Padstow, and in Camden, in Manhattan, and even when I was stationed abroad. There were always strays.”
Silver considered him, following Flint into the kitchen and again perching himself on the bar. “You knew how to take care of strays but the concept of being their forever home scared you.”
It took a moment for Flint to reply. Silver watched him roll up his sleeves, tattoos vibrant in the golden hour light that filled the kitchen. He watched as he washed his hands, pulled out the prepared ingredients for the duck sauvage and rabe he was making, and set to work.
“I never felt stable enough to have a pet,” Flint said as he coated the pan in butter. “Not even when Thomas and I were first over in Manhattan, once he’d recovered from the accident, it just- there were too many risks, too many variables. We already had so much on our plate, between his recovery and the bar that any pet we did have wouldn’t get the attention it needed.”
He set the seasoned duck breasts in the pan and let them cook, stepping away to pour them each a glass of negroni from the pitcher he’d made the night before. “I refused to adopt an animal only to risk neglecting it. So, once we moved here I found the local ferals and the people with their own colonies and did what I could.”
Silver nodded, taking the drink and the soft kiss that came with it. “And now? Since you both seemed so settled here?”
Flint smiled fondly at him. “I was too busy making sure I could bring you home for good to think about pets.”
For an asshole, Flint really was an unbelievably sappy romantic.
Silver felt himself blushing, knew he must have been from the way Flint’s smile sharpened a little before stealing another kiss. “I suppose thats fair.”
They looked up at the sound of the front door and sure enough Thomas’ voice echoed down the hall. “I hope you two aren’t fucking without me again.”
“Do blow jobs count?” Silver called back as Flint flicked his ear, the sound of Thomas’ laughter preceding him.
“Whatever you’re cooking smells divine,” Thomas said, joining them in the kitchen. He looked tired, his carefully styled hair a bit ruffled from the wind and his fingers toying with it, his shoulders heavy with a full day of lectures so that he leaned more heavily on his ornate walking stick than he had that morning. Silver watched as he pulled Flint in for a kiss, noting the way his body began to relax and shed the stress.
“It’ll be ready in forty minutes, if you both can stop distracting me,” Flint teased, kissing his husband’s cheek before turning back to the stove. “How was your day?”
Thomas groaned, moving around Flint to greet Sliver with a kiss hello. “Don’t ask me that till I’ve had time to process it. Exam season approaches with it’s usual misery.” Silver managed to steal a few more progressively dirty kisses before Thomas pulled away with a hum. “Hello pet.”
“Evening Professor,” Silver replied sweetly, feeling a thrill at the way Thomas’ blue eyes darkened at the title. “Need some help freshening up before dinner?”
Thomas laughed, though he looked like he might be considering it, and took a sip of Silver’s drink. “No, no, best save that for after dinner. I’m just going to go wash up down the hall.”
Begrudgingly Silver let him go, moving to sit in one of the bar chairs so he could watch Flint cook more comfortably. For short time the kitchen was quiet, save for the sounds of food cooking and Flint occasionally muttering to himself.
Then, suddenly, they heard Thomas’ voice in the hall.
“Oh- oh my goodness hello precious! Oh hello just look at you-“
Flint looked up from the stove top with a frown that Silver returned. They listened a moment long as Thomas cooed and made soft little noises, the kind someone made when talking to a cat, for example.
There was a moment of silent realization as they stared at each other. The glass door to the deck was still open.
“Did you make sure the gate was closed?” Flint asked, already moving to clean his hands.
“In theory?” Silver replied, scrambling off his stool and out into the hall.
Thomas sat against the wall with the white and brown stray in his arms, the cat purring loudly and rubbing himself all over Thomas’ shirt. His brother was sniffing curiously at Thomas’ shoes, though upon seeing Silver, he trotted over to him with his long fluffy tail held high. Silver crouched down as best he could without his prosthetic, holding out his hand to the cat who greeted him happily.
“You didn’t tell me we were adopting kittens!” Thomas said in bewildered delight when Flint finally joined them, the poor man staring at his two partners in equal disbelief.
“Uhm.”
“They were curled up in the parlor! They woke up when I came in a suppose and they followed me over to the bathroom- where did you get them? They’re such angels oh my goodness-”
“It’s a bit of a story, actually.” Silver held back his laughter as the more skittish brother crawled into his lap, Flint’s face growing more and more overwhelmed, and more and more flushed as he watched.
“They’re uhm. Strays.” Flint finally managed to say. “From the neighborhood. I must’ve left the gate open, and the- the deck door was- they must've slipped in while I was cooking-”
“Oh you saint of a man,” Thomas said, getting carefully to his feet with an armful of cat. “Were you feeding them? Of course you were, thats a ridiculous question isn’t it. Have they had their shots? Oh we need to find a vet, schedule a visit. And they need baths, and a groomer too I imagine. Do we have enough food-” his voiced trailed off as he went back to the kitchen to search the cabinets.
Silver looked up at Flint with a fond smile.
“Guess I brought a few extra strays with me, huh?” he asked, holding out a hand so Flint could help him up.
It got him a weak laugh, Flint helping him carefully to his feet and greeting the cat in his arms. “Looks like it. Though I don’t think any of you are strays anymore, what with a home like this and all.”
Silver tried not to think too hard about the way his heart ached at Flint’s words, leaning in for a kiss instead. “Go finish dinner, I’ll help Thomas get these two washed up.”
The cat in his arms lifted his striped shaggy head and nuzzled into Flint’s beard a moment, as if to reassure him and Silver watched as any possible argument Flint might muster vanished in an instant.
“Good thing I bought that extra cat food, huh?”
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lightsaberupmybutt · 3 years
Text
Three’s a Crowd - Reader/Ben Solo/Poe Damerson (Modern AU)
alright so Ben/Kylo is a big ego kid in this, because of course. Also, Rey is ACTUALLY Lukes daughter in this, making them cousins. Ive fiddled with the plot okay sue me. 
Summary: Poe, Finn and their roommate have been living in a harmonious tenancy, but when Finn decides to move out for a year of travelling, the two are left with no option but to look elsewhere for their third body. Rey Skywalker, a friend of the group, proposes her cousin for the role. He's in a band, wears all black and all in all is somewhat of a social reject - but he's also all theyve got.  
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“I think that one was actually somehow worse than last weeks” You tell Poe, as he pours himself a juice and settles down next to you on the sofa. You'd just finished showing around another possible roommate and you felt exhausted in every sense of the word. 
“How can he be worse than the neo nazi?” Poe shot you an unbelieving look and rolled his eyes, kicking his feet up onto the coffee table and knocking some of your papers in his wake. 
“Alex was a she, and they asked if they could hang their deer head in the front room” you grimaced even thinking about it, weren't all artsy college students supposed to be vegetarians anyway? why did you have to get saddled with the only blood thirsty one on campus. 
“Thats not so bad”
“Poe she showed me a picture of her taxidermied cat”
“Oh”
You had tried to find a polite way to stop her from passing you her phone, but you were too nice to make her feel uncomfortable, and now the image of the long dead tabby would remain behind your eyes for god knows how long. 
“was she hot?” You shook your head, causing Poe to sigh wistfully. 
“Not hot enough to cancel out her obsession with dead bodies anyway” you informed him, the hopeful look from his eyes gone. 
“Face it Poe, were doomed” You let your head fall into your hands, Poe letting out a laugh before wrapping his arm around your shoulder. 
“Hey we’ll get someone! who wouldn't want to live here?” You knew his question was rhetorical but when looking around the cleaner than usual flat, you had to admit it was missing something. Bare spaces on the walls from where Finn had taken down his pictures, the empty side of the kitchen counter that had once houses his overpriced coffees. You even missed picking up his empty cups after him, the room feeling like it had less character without them. It truly hadn't felt the same in the flat since Finn had left, and although Poe concealed it well, you could see it was getting to him too. Poe had, after all, known Finn first; Finn managing to get a very drunk and outspoken Poe out of a sticky situation he had found himself in when running across a local gang in a dive bar. The ‘first order’ as they so called themselves, had an infamous reputation around campus for being trouble makers and general doers of bad deeds. Ever since that night they had been an unstoppable duo, until they met you of course, and their duo became three. 
You loved Finn, and you knew told miss him like hell, but you also knew that Poe must be feeling that ten times over. 
“You wanna do something tonight?” You asked, changing the subject before his mind  drifted to where yours had. 
“what kind of something?” he wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, 
“Gross” 
“hey I'm serious!”
“what about Razor Crest, they are open late, we could grab some drinks and meet up with some people” 
Razor crest was the only worth while bar in town; it was certainly nothing to write home about, but it played fairly decent music and it had a marginally less sticky floor than others. Additionally, your other friends lived just over from the humble saloon, making it the perfect watering hole for you guys. 
It didn't take much convincing before you had Poe out the door and ready to socialise. Upon arrival, he headed to the bar while you were waved over by Rey, who had already found a booth and was already at least a few drinks in. 
“Look, i think i have a solution to your roomie problemo” She told you, peeking over her straw, a gleam in her eye that made you feel not all too confident in her yet to be spoken plan. 
“Go on” you told her, cautiously. 
“My cousins back in town” She told you between gulps. 
“The weird one?” You asked, 
“Hes not weird, just ...eccentric” the last word was more of a question, but you could tell she was on a roll, 
“He's just joined one of the college bands and Auntie Leia says him and Uncle Han are butting heads” 
“ah cool, weve always wanted  live music in our own flat at 2 am” Poe injected, rejoining the table and placing a drink in front of you before taking a sip of his own. 
“hes not BAD at it, he just plays loud i think” She corrected him, “anyway, he's not a total twat, I'm sure he would be considerate of your sleep schedules” 
“didn't he try and stab you with a stick when you were five” you asked her, you'd heard stories of this cousin before and none of them were quite savoury, 
“that was ages ago! he's like way old now” she was starting to slur her words, but you had a feeling this was something Rey was quite set on. Rey was stubborn, and when she got something in mind she would move hell to make it happen; she was also your best friend, and someone you trusted the judgment off. Had she gotten you into some weird shit in the past? sure. 
Did you have any other options; nay on that. 
“Fine, get Han or Leia to bring him round at some point next week and one of us will give him a tour” You tell her, and she lets out a little happy shrill at her own personal win. Poe, not so much. 
“Speak for yourself, weirdo cousin can see himself around” he crosses his arms and pouts, you give him a little nudge. 
“Hey, maybe you'll be best mates” you offer, but when he shoots you a death stare you go back to your drink.
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The family turmoil must have been more vicious than Rey had let in on; It was barely the next morning before you had a tall, intimidating male knocking on your door. 
“Hey!” you offered him, in as cheery a voice as your hung over self would allow.
He looked down at you from his towering height, but gave no verbal response. 
“You must be Ben?...”  He offered you the slightest nod you'd had ever seen in response. Okay so, not much of a talker, noted. 
You waved him in, shutting the door behind him. God, he looked even bigger inside? is that possible? Rey had failed to mention the sheer height on the boy. You'd seen pictures of her and her aunt and uncle, it seemed like Ben was a scientific and biological mystery. Like how did he get clothes to fit? did he have to shop somewhere special or
you were snapped out of your thoughts by a clearing of a throat. 
“So, how much is the rent” so he DID have a voice, 
You informed him automatically, still part dazed. 
“Ill be in by the weekend” he told you, and with a nod he moved past you, making his way back to the door.
“But wait .. y .. you haven't even seen your room yet?” You stumbled, dumbfound by the lack of foreplay. The previous people you had shown around were full of questions; they wanted to know the ins and outs of the place. Ben had seen all of the door way and the front room and he was already signing the lease. 
“See you then” he didn't stop, hand on the door knob as if you hadn't spoken.
“But i don't have your phone number” you don't know why that came to you first, but it was true. At no point had Rey offered you direct contact with Ben, probably assuming he would. It seemed reasonable, that you'd need his number before he moved in, didn't it? Poe was always texting you about random shit in the flat, arguably too much, but it seemed like the norm for people coexisting in such a small space. 
He turned back at you and gave you a confused look, 
“why would you need my number?”
“erm... to talk to you” your condescending tone not completely masked, 
“but ill be living here” he stated, which, he had you there. 
Before you could even think of a response  he was out the door.
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True to his word, Ben had his things over by that very same weekend. Although it was unsurprising considering just how light he packed. In fact, other than his bass and musical equipment, you couldn't really think of anything he had actually brought with him to the flat. You got to meet his parents when they dropped him off, both of whom seemed leaps and bounds more conversational than their son. Ironically, you got Leia’s phone number before her sons; her telling you to message if you ever needed anything. It felt like an indirect jab at Ben, a ‘if he fucks up let me know’, but you digress. The tension between Ben and his dad was blatantly obvious, them sharing no words before he got back into the car and Ben into the house. He did give his mum a small hug goodbye though, and you thought you saw a small tear in her eye before she managed to wipe it away. 
Since his move in, Ben had kept painfully to himself. You barely saw him at all in those first days, just heard him through the walls the odd time he dropped something - or saw a plate or cup gone from their places in the kitchen. To be honest , it felt more like a paranormal haunting than a new roommate. Poe was vocal of his apprehension to the situation, sharing glances with you when you would both be in the living room and you'd see ben scurry by or passive aggressively texting you when his favourite cup had been used by someone who wasn't him. it was a relatively small issue, but Poe had blown it so out of proportion that you had ordered a new set of cups from Amazon and sent him the link, shutting him up for a while before he found something else to complain about.
it was the fifth day before you actually bumped into ben again. He was on the sofa with his base set up, twiddling with his amp. The sight surprised you so much you physically jumped back, causing him to look up. crap. act cool. act cool. 
“hey” you offered him
“hi” hi replied back, looking back down at his amp. 
right, yer. his space, give him his space. Just get your stuff and go back to your room. don't speak to him, leave him alone. he clearly wants to be left alone. 
“nice day isn't it” you wanted to cover your mouth, the words coming out against your will. Truthfully, you had no clue why you said it. You hadn't even looked at the weather this morning. Its just what people say right? 
“Erm” his eyes shot to the window and then back to yours,”no”
sure enough, it was pissing it down outside. The sky was actually comically grey and you'd have laughed if you werent so angry at yourself. You were unsure of what to do, and he was still looking at you, almost assessing you. His eyes were so serious and dark they felt like they were burning tiny holes into your skin. shit, you had to speak now right?
While regretting every single life decision that had brought you into this kitchen at this time, Poe sauntered into the room like your night in shining armour, ignoring Ben all together and coming straight over to you, placing a big arm around your shoulders. You saw Ben drop his head back down to this bass, and you used all your might to not let out a sigh of relief.
“Tonight, I'm taking you out” He offered, a cheeky gleam in his eye. 
“Are you now” 
“Razor crest, drinks and dancing, be there or be square” He lists off as if he's a paid promoter, causing you to let out a giggle. 
“Whos invited?” 
“just the gang” he said, causing you to shoot him an eye roll, knowing full well you ‘gang’ consisted of all of three people, yourself and Poe included in that number. 
but then you remembered, there was another person now, whether they liked it or not. Poe’s eyes followed yours to Ben and then back to meet yours again, you saw the realisation change to disgust, as he shook his head silently at you. 
you knew this look, the ‘don't you dare’ look, the ‘not in 1000 years’ look. But you couldn't help it, your lips were moving before you could stop them for the second time this morning. 
“Are you free tonight, Ben?’
The look of sheer betrayal on Poe's face made you wince, surely he'd understand right? he knew you well enough to know your verbal diarrhoea  problem. 
Ben didn't even look up, but he did let out a small laugh that felt quite antagonistic. 
“i dont go to Razor Crest” 
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“i don't go to razor crest ugh” Poe mocked, causing Rey to let out a hysterical giggle, and you a sigh. 
You'd been out for all of three hours and you were all already feeling the effects of the alcohol. It was late and the bar was jam packed with students all raring to go. Poe had been making eyes at one particular red head  almost all night and you were half surprised he hadn't already made his move. Poe put out, it was a fact. You and Finn had at one time made a fridge chart for him, a gold star awarded every time he brought  girl home. Whether the goal was to make him feel proud of his conquests or embarrassed, you still weren't 100% sure, but after a month or so you had both lost count and given up. You told yourself it didn't bother you, that he was just a friend, and that he owed you nothing, but every time he left you at the bar for another girl something stung inside; something you pushed deep down but regrettably was still there none the less. 
Sure enough, as the night progressed, you and Rey ended up fending for it alone, and instead of feeling sorry for yourself you decided to do the responsible thing and drink more. 
After the third round of shots, Rey calls it in. 
“I think I'm gonna be sick” she tells you sheepishly, and you can't help but belly laugh in response. She starts to shuffle towards the door and you go to follow.
“Hey don't leave on my behalf” she tells you earnestly, but you wave her off. 
“Nah I've had my fill, I'm starting to forget which flat number i live at” you tell her, causing her to giggle this time. 
You both stumble out the bar, past the smokers and up the cobbled road towards her flat. She unlocks her door and lets herself in, not before giving you a drunken hug and a sloppy kiss on the cheek. 
As you ready yourself to make your way back to your own flat, you come back past the bar entrance; a particularly prominent cobble causes you to trip ever so slightly and gain a whoop from a group of boys who were passing round a box of marlboro straights. 
You suddenly realised just how dark it was and just how alone you were. Most nights you wouldn't stay out this late, and if you did, then you'd normally be walking back with finn. You let out a shiver, a mix of both the cold night air finally breaking through your drunken daze and a smidge of fear. The Razor Crests entrance lights were getting progressively further away, and although you know that you only had a maximum of a half mile walk back to your home, it felt like ample distance to get kidnapped or murdered in, most probably both. 
How many true crime stories started with a young drunk girl, scantily clad and out alone at night? You could hear the police reports now, which photo would they use? you prayed it would be a hot one, at the very least one after your thin brow phase. 
Being literally bumped back into reality, in almost a cruel humorous way, you felt yourself walk head first into a figure, their arms coming out to catch you as the sheer momentum bounced you back. 
Oh god, I'm dead. I'm literally going to die.  
“Hey, chill out” The voice made your heart beat both slow and race again, 
“Ben?!” you shrieked, voice hoarse through pure anticipation of your thought to be demise 
“Are you okay” he asked, and only then did you realise you were shaking like a leaf. 
“Im fine” you let out in a small voice, looking down at your shoes. You could feel the redness in your cheeks through pure embarrassment alone. This was not an ideal situation for him to see you in, and you kind of started to with that he had been a murderer, at least then you wouldn't have to deal with the second hand embarrassment in the morning. 
“What are you doing out here”
“why are you out alone” 
you both asked simultaneously,
“I was coming out for a smoke” He told you, flashing his tobacco pouch at you from inside his coat. His very warm looking coat, might you add. Another shiver ran down your body. 
“Im coming home from Razor Crest” you tell him, trying to be matter of fact but slurring your words just enough to spoil the show. 
“Yes obviously, but why are you alone” he shoots back in some what of a patronising tone, it wouldn't sit well with sober you and it definitely doesn't go down well with drunk you. 
“Im a big girl” 
“clearly” he makes, making extra sure to look you up and down from his towering distance above you, causing you to huff. 
“well i can take care of myself” 
“you shouldn't be out alone around here, its not safe” he ignores your response, looking you dead in the eye. 
You feel something inside you flutter, a warmth that you can't quite control. Okay, ben might be weird and a bit annoying it would seem, but he was handsome, thats for sure. The limited light danced off his strong features and dark shaggy mop of hair, making him look both dangerous and appealing. 
As if you were standing here mentally flirting with the idea of being with Res cousin; you made a mental note to punish yourself for the ludicrous thoughts in the morning. 
“Okay well I'm going home now” you tell him, attempting to push past him, but his large hand finds its way to your forearm and pulls you back,
“yes, you are, come on” If what he said before was patronising, he was now speaking to you like you were a dog he was walking. 
“go have your nicotine, ive got this one covered” you tell him with a mock salute, causing him to roll his eyes. He lets go of your arm and you take your win, trying to step confidently away without falling. You're proud of yourself for handling the situation when you realise he's following all  of 10 steps behind you, rolling a cigarette in his hands while holding a filter between his teeth. 
when he catches you looking, he nods down to his hands, 
“want one?” he mumbles between his lips, still holding the filter pride of place. 
“no thanks” you snap, picking up pace. 
Ben smirks at you, but you miss it, too focused on not embarrassing yourself and keeping your feet in line. 
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moralesispunk · 3 years
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Let Dancing do the Talking
Javier Peña x Female Reader
Warnings - smut, 18+
Summary - When you and Javi have your own reasons for not wanting to tell each other your true feelings you let dancing do the talking.
"Okay, okay, one more", you say raising a very wobbly hand to the bartender.
With two shots placed in front of you and the salt and lime ready, you lift one of the glasses.
"Cheers to- to" you pursed your lips trying to come up with an end to the sentence. 
"Cheers to us," Javi finishes for you.
With a clink of the glasses you both take the shots and Javi laughs at your scrunched up nose, his eyes crinkled near the side showing he truly meant it. Work had been hard lately and you rarely seen him with a smile let alone a laugh, so nights where you could both let loose a little meant a lot to you. 
When you first started working together you were warned about him, "he flirts with anything that moves" and "fucks his way through Bogota". However, the more you spent time with him, both in work with him and Steve or after work for some drinks, you realised there was a lot more to him. You knew you were falling for him but couldn't take the heartbreak or embarrassment if he found out so that was a secret you kept close to your chest.
The buzz of that last shot was flowing through your veins as the music picked up and dance floor filled a little more.
"Right Javier, I think it's time for a dance."
He tried to hide the smirk that came to his face as you used his full name. He didn't really care whether someone called him Javi or Javier but with you, saying his full name felt so personal. He also wasn't usually one for dancing but with the mix of alcohol and his own lust for you flowing through his body he took your outstretched hand, following behind through the sea of bodies.
Your hands found each other, with one of his hands placed gently in the small of your back and other clasped with yours. Your hips were tight together and you could feel every movement in his hips. 
You tried to keep your focus on his eyes but the muscles in his white shirt kept drawing your attention. He was trying just as hard to keep his eyes on yours but they continued to dart to your soft lips and chest that was thinly covered in sweat with the heat of the bar. 
Javi had thought you were beautiful from the moment he met you but he started falling for you after you started working with one another. You always had a comeback to his one liners, you were strong and self-assured, you gave him a run for him money. He found himself wanting to know everything about you, from why you moved to work here to your favourite music. He knew he was falling hard  but never acted on it, not wanting to ruin one of the few real friendships he had in his life if you rejected him. 
Suddenly the dance was doing all the talking and saying everything you were both afraid to say. He spun you until your back was against his chest, one hand now on your hip and other on your waist, continuing to move your body in time with his hips. 
You didn't know the song that was playing but Javi sang the words low in your ear, sending goosebumps down your arms and a chill through your body. He placed a kiss behind your ear, making your breath catch in your throat. You spun yourself to face one another again and managed to breathe out a near beg asking him to take you home before your mind even realised what what was happening. 
He grabbed your hand and moved back through the bodies on the dance floor, throwing money down at the bar while grabbing your jackets.
The ride back to his apartment was a blur, his eyes moving from the road to you and back to the road with his fingers tracing small circles higher and higher on your thigh.
The rush out of the car and into the apartment was an even bigger blur, a mess of desperate hands and wet kisses. His lips never left yours as he unlocked the door with you pressed up against it before leading your tangled bodies towards the couch.
His lips were soft against yours and his hands had changed from desperate to gentle. They moved up and down your back and sides while yours held tightly onto his shoulders, straddling hip lap. His hips started rocking back and forth with you now grinding into his growing bulge. The thought of him behind hard for you made you smirk into the kiss.
His hand moved towards the hem of your dress, stopping the kiss to look you in the eyes, "Can I?"
You nodded and helped him by lifting your arms in the air and while the dark fabric fell to the floor his eyes were now glued to your body. He would be lying to himself if he said he hadn't thought of what you would look like under your clothes but he never expected just how amazing you would look. You arched your back more so he could have a proper look. 
His teeth were biting at his bottom lip and his arm reaching back to unclasp your bra, his eyes once again back at yours as you nodded to let him know this was good.
"Now Javier, I think it's your turn," you smirked, placing a soft kiss on his lips.
You started unbuttoning his shirt, placing kisses down his jaw to his neck and then collarbone. Taking off his shirt you let your hands roam his body, up his chest and down his back. There was no talking and only your hot, needy breathes hanging in the air. 
“Bedroom,” he mumbled standing up and keeping your legs wrapped around his waist carried you towards his bedroom.
He sat at the end of the bed and you pushed him onto his back to unbuckle his belt and slide his jeans down as he lifted his hips to let this happen. You moved back up his body to straddle him, placing kisses along the waistband of his boxers as you moved up.
He sat up and locked eyes again, his hands playing with the edge of your underwear.
“Please,” you begged.
His hands dipped in as soon as the words left your mouth, rubbing circles on your clit and you bucked your hips back and forth grinding on his hard length.
“I want - I need to feel you in me,” you begged again.
He flipped you over and in pulling your underwear down your legs he was planting kisses down them as he went. He stood to take his boxers off, freeing his hardened length with precum now dripping from the tip before he moved to hover over you, one hand at the side of your head and the other lining himself up at your entrance.
“Is this okay,” he purred
You nodded but that was not enough for him, “I need to hear you say it.”
“Yes, Javier, please,” you begged.
He pressed a soft kiss to your lips before pressing his forehead against yours, looking down to watch himself press into you. Both your groans filled the room and were swallowed by needy lips against one another. The thrusts started slow and gentle before harder and faster.
“Fuck, it feels so good,” he hummed, “I’ve been thinking - shit - I’ve been thinking about this since the first time I see you bend over my desk in that tight little skirt, you knew what you were doing to me,” he smirked.
“Frankie, please,” you didn’t know what you were begging for.
“Need you to cum with me, okay,” he begged bringing one hand from the side of your head to rub circles in your clit.
Your legs wrapped tighter around his waist bringing him as close as possible against your body.
“You close baby? I can feel you, cum with me,” he commanded.
“Frankie I’m - I’m”
“I know baby, let go,” he whispered in your ear.
You felt the wave wash over your and couldn’t control the shaking or moans that he captured with his lips against yours and he followed not long after, a mix of your name and curses falling from his lips. With a couple of sloppy thrusts he kept his head on your shoulder, placing kisses down your body as his softening cock pulled out. As you came down from your high he grabbed a cloth from your bathroom to clean you up.
“You did so good baby,” he said as he placed kisses to your thighs, then hands, then up to your forehead, “so good,” he praised. 
When you came back from the bathroom to clean yourself up properly you found him lying now under the covers of the bed. Climbing in next to him he brought your body tight to his, your head buried into his chest with his arms wrapped securely around your body.
“I think I might have to take you on a real date, now,” Javi chuckled.
You looked up to try and read the expression on his face.
“Honestly though, I would like to take you out for a date, if - if thats what you want?” he sounded wary, scared you would reject him in this moment.
“Of course thats what I want, its what I’ve wanted since my first day at the office,” you smiled.
He smiled back, and wrapped his arms tighter around you, scared to let you go. You fell asleep to circles rubbed into your back and kisses placed to the top of your head and Javi had the best and fullest nights sleep he had in years, already planning the date he wanted to take you out on.
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bitchiha · 4 years
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To Eternal Bliss, I’m so Glad to Know (ModernAU!Hidan x Reader)
The Rats 1k event prompt: Street racer x Hidan
A/N: hey.. aha.. how y'all doing.. hum so i haven't been doing great, I think that is evident through my inactivity on this blog, but that being said i am in a bit of a better place now. i finally have some time to myself and i intend to put that towards my 900 follower event. Enjoy this wonderful piece of modern racer Hidan that strayed into crazy murder himbo I love car man Hidan.
Title inspired by: this song.
MAJOR TWs: smut, harassment (brief, undescriptive), uhm murter, reckless driving, lots of mentions of and contemplations of death. You are a literal accomplice to murter. Reader is confused. But.. It’s not supposed to be gory and dark, I kinda wanted it to just be stupid and reflect a himbo hidan as much as I could. Last like 6 paragraphs aren’t edited.
-
You shouldn’t be in a criminals car, much less in the middle of a police chase and much much less be falling in love with him.
 His silver hair flashes wildly in the occasional flicker of red and blue lights, teeth bared; he was making that face again. That one he had when he first met you, lips curled and canines showing. It looked like he was in pain. It was just because he was actually trying to use his brain, you think. He grips the wheel tightly, the whites of his pale knuckles glowing as he swerves onto one of the busiest city streets you know. 
Barely avoiding a collision with a distinct yellow blur you could barely classify as a taxi, he continued to speed through the lanes, horns blaring and merging into the sound of the wailing sirens quickly approaching. Another sharp turn onto a slightly less busy road had your body slamming against the console, leaning close to Hidan. Your eyes stray from the window and onto his face, unable to hear what he is saying, you make out the movement of his lips:
shit,shit,shiiit 
The tires screeched as he fumbled around with the controls, sending the car into a full 180 and narrowly avoiding a police car sacrificing its auto body in favour of capturing Jashin. That was real close call, just scratching the side of the passenger door, but you wouldn't know; you were still watching your boyfriends features as he speeds off down another dirty alley. 
You were pretty sure that one day you were going to die trapped in Hidans little metal box.. A distant part of you wanted to throw up when you realized you wouldn’t have it any other way.
Sure, he was obnoxiously annoying in the most serious of times and incredibly oblivious when you desperately needed him to get a clue. I mean fuck, it felt like despite his adolescent years of elementary and secondary school (which you’re not even sure he attended) his brain only had the capacity to process two things. The first being lewd shit and the second would be the gas pedal... and maybe half a braincell was in there thinking of you, but probably only of you in your panties or something really shallow like that. 
You really shouldn’t love him. 
Barrelling down the alley he randomly slammed the breaks down, the lack of warning sending you flying forward. Bracing yourself to be slammed into the front of car, but just when you thought you were going to break your nose Hidan reversed, sending your body backwards instead. You yelped and he sent you a stupid little apologetic curl of his lip before twisting his body, hand coming to your chair for support as he sped the car backwards through the trash littered street. You didn't understand why he suddenly changed his mind about the direction until a few seconds later when a black and white cop car swerved down the alley in the direction you were back pedalling from. Hidan must have known they were going to try and cut his route off.    
  At the sight of the police vehicle your boyfriend impulsively slammed the breaks, rolling his window down and leaning his head out of it, “Ha, you stupid fucks think you could catch Jashin with some lame shit like that? I could smell that from a mile away!” From your boyfriends childish tone you predicted he was going to blow a raspberry, but the sound of speeding tires approaching quickly stopped him. Sirens blaring, the police car sped its way forward. 
“Oh fuck.” Hidan sped Jashin backwards again. 
  You remembered the first time you met Jashin.
  It was late that night, you were making your long trek home after a disastrous closing shift. You were tired. So fucking tired. You never would have taken that shortcut if you weren’t truly physically drained. As you made your way briskly through that musky trash infested canal, you were stopped by a man who smelled just as intensely as the alley itself. It was so much so that you had thought that perhaps it was the mans smell that was so potent and not the space itself. 
  Defining what the source of that smell was wasn’t important though, not when he was coming straight at you with barred, yellow teeth. You didn't know what to do and to be fair, what the fuck were you supposed to do? He was yelling something, you couldn't hear it over the thrashing of your erratic heartbeat.  Were you going to die? You were so fucking tired. 
Maybe you should run.
  You didn’t though. Didn’t have the energy. So you let the man come face to face with your figure, grabbing at the lapels of your coat and screaming. His breath was unbearable and you thought you were going to pass away just from the smell as opposed to actually being murdered. Although you suppose this could probably qualify for a murder, his breath was most definitely a weapon. But despite his shouts being directly at you, his humid breath spraying across your face as his chest constantly heaved, you couldn't understand what he was saying. 
“Jashin! Jashin is coming!” 
  What the fuck was Jashin? Could you still not hear him? He was probably sick. You were tired. So you continued to let him shake your form. Was he going to kill you or just ask for some money?
  Thats when a beast of sleek red metal swerved down the alley, trampling over peeled open garbage bags and beer bottles, approaching you with each sound of a crinkled can. It was gunning straight towards the man who was backing you up against the wall, he was frothing and screaming at the sight and the next moment the hood of the car slammed into his form. Despite your close proximity to the man, you were left barely unscathed and a little bit disappointed.  
  The scene laid frozen for a good thirty seconds: the man unconscious on the floor, your unsteady breathing and the window of the car rolling down. It inched back to reveal a man about your age - which made him just barely a man - with silver slicked back hair, barred teeth and knitted eyebrows. 
“Shit.” 
  You just stared at him, backpack beginning to slide down your shoulders. He stared back at you, waiting to see what your next move was going to be. You didn’t have one. 
  “...If it makes you feel any better, douchebag deserved it.” The man said a few minutes later, he clearly wasn't expecting the crumpled body on the floor to have tried to seek out help, let alone from a cute girl. He smoothed his hair back. 
   His crappy attempt to seduce you didn't work and nor did his equally crap words of consolation, you were tired. This whole situation was even more tiring. You just wanted to sleep. 
  “I won't tell anyone, if you just drive me home.”
  He clearly wasn't expecting that, you could tell that from the pained look intensifying on his face and his little choked gasp. A few moments later it released like an elastic band snapping and his features set into a smug smirk. A cute girl who wasn’t gonna snitch on him?
  “You’re not going to question the fact that I just hit someone with my car? Is it cause I'm so fucking sex-” 
  You weren’t listening, walking over the heap of a body and around the car into the passenger seat. The contrasting smell of vanilla and cigarettes clouded your senses as you clicked your seatbelt into place - noticing his lack of one in the process.
You hated that your face was burning up as you spoke. “I live a few blocks away.” 
For a while you were sure that this was the first girl Hidan had ever had in his car. It was obvious that he was freaking out, maybe if he didn’t hit people in alleyways and then blamed your silence on the fact that he was so fucking sexy, then maybe he would be able to talk to more.
  He tried to blab to you the whole way to your apartment accidentally making wrong turns to try and extend the length of your stay. He told you about that man in the alley, said something about how he totally fucked him over in some black market shit for auto parts. Said his enemy, - he stressed this word very intensely - Shikamaru probably put him up to it. Nobody messes with Jashin goddamit, I fucking hate that guy. It was a shit justification for murder no doubt, there is never a good reason to hit someone with a car, but you supposed your indifference wasn't any better. 
  You stole a couple glances at him every now and then, when his eyes took a break from darting back and fourth between your thighs, your face and the road. He had a sharp jaw, pretty cheekbones, gelled back hair with small strands escaping every so often - causing him to brush them back when too many tickled his forehead - his lashes were long and his eyes so pretty so in the dim light of the empty city streets. His teeth were straight and sharp canines peeked out whenever he sent you a suggestive smirk.
You also spent an unbelievably long time watching his fingers maneuver the steering wheel, the way his hands flexed with a certain turn. The veins of his forearms travelling underneath his leather jacket pushed up at the elbows, his jeans were all worn out and faded and his shoes looked like they were about to fall apart, it was a big difference in comparison to the well kept state of his handsome car.
  When he finally made it to your complex after running out of roads to take wrong turns down, he looked at you like a lost puppy, rolling the passenger window down to call out to you as you opened the lobby doors. “So I’ll meet you out here tomorrow then? Say, around 9?” 
  You turned to look at him confusedly, inquiring as to why he would be picking you up when you made no reservations to see him again, why would you want to see your accomplice in a murder ever again? But he was already speeding off before you got the chance. 
At least you could finally go to sleep.
The next day he was outside your apartment fifteen past nine, blaring his horn as he maneuvered his upper body to hover out the window of his lovely Jashin. You were nestled on your couch, staring at the blue light of the TV screen in your dark apartment desperately trying to avoid the textbook glowering at you from the coffee table.
‘Cute kitten saved from tree’ was sprawled across the bottom of your television in bold letters as a perky blonde read off the little cue cards in her hand. You’d been watching the news all day, waiting for the red breaking news! To slice across the screen and read out the description of a crippled homeless gambler found dead in an alley, but it never came.
It mad you feel a little angry when you realized his death wasn’t going to be announced and you knew there was no way it hadn’t been discovered yet. Then you sat startled at the realization that you didn’t feel anything towards what happened. That the anger you felt in wanting it to be so desperately displayed on the news was because you hoped you would feel something then.
The sound of Hidans car horn threw you out of your thoughts as you jumped like a frightened cat to the window. Peeling back the curtain you were surprised to see that blood stained blotch on the road with a lavender haired boy peeking out, baring his teeth.
You contemplated staying inside, he didn’t know your apartment number, but you knew that he definitely wouldn’t stop blaring the horn if you didn’t. His hand was undeniably laying flat against the centre of he wheel as he continued to sound out, you heard someone yell for him to fucking shut up. Hidan continued as if he didn’t hear. It kind of flattered you.
You wanted to vomit.
You took the stairs.
It was the beginning of winter when you finally let Hidan fuck you. You were in some parking lot lined with pitch black shops on a Sunday night. Everyone closed early going home to their families, except the two of you of course.
It was odd being with him for this long. One outing turned into another and then another, before you knew it he was picking you up every night at nine -sometimes fifteen minutes passed,- blaring his horn excitedly as he peeked out his car.
He told you it was the perfect place to do donuts, didn’t you want to do donuts? You did. It was the beginning of winter. It was icy. His idea was incredibly fucking stupid. But you agreed because maybe you’d skid on the ice and smash into a store, get crushed by the crumbling debris..
There was little snowflakes hitting the windows of Jashin as you two sat parked in the middle of the deserted lot.
“You ready? Oh you’re gonna love this, babe.”
He grinned as your face heated up at the name, you always got all flustered whenever he said anything like that. It made him feel giddy. His long fingers start Jashin up, moving to clutch the wheel as the car thrums to life.
When he makes the first swerve with his car, he turns his head to watch your body all stiff and frightened. It was funny. He laughed as your face twisted into an even more flustered one - if that was possible. God, you were always such a hard ass at the beginning of the night, but when he dropped you off outside your apartment early into the morning he always made sure to leave you with a little smile on your face. Even now, this early into the night he could see the beginnings of one.
He twisted the wheel again and your body flew to the left, smooshing into the console and the surprised laugh that left your mouth had his guts twisting. He wanted to hear it again. Your walls always fell when he did stupid shit like this. You were kinda fucked up now that he thought about it. Always getting all giggly when you should probably be screaming at him to be more careful for fucks sake! But you never did and he loved that about you. Just as fucked as he was.
“Hey babe, babe! This one’ll be good. Watch, watch.” He gripped the wheel again and grinded his sneaker into the gas, the first skid across asphalt was intentional, but when he tried to regain the reigns of his dark red beast it began to thrash out of his control.
Goddamn ice patch.
The car twisted, screeched and burned into the pavement for a good twenty seconds and when he was sure you should be screaming because I mean come on, that was fucking scary, he heard silence.
As the car came to a complete stop and your body was once again flung against the console, he turned to you. He thinks he was gonna ask if you were okay but he couldn’t remember because the next moment you were grabbing tufts of his gelled hair and sucking his face off.
He loved every second of it. The amount of times he’d tried to get his dick wet with you before was astronomical, but you’d always tell him no and he would pout like a dog. But hey, now you’re shoving your tongue down his throat like a dog so he settled on the idea that good things do come to people who wait.
The reason you decided to do it then was blurry. One moment his car was skidding around the parking lot and you were laughing and thinking of the chance of death and the next second it spat onto your tongue and you realized you didn’t want it anymore.
Like that first time you slid into his car, as you kissed him now you tasted contrasting flavours. Mint and cigarettes. For a moment you thought you were going to pull away, but you felt the sudden need to drink all of it. To somehow understand why you felt like you were burning from the inside.
It was his fault really. Hidan made you feel less tired, if that was a good way to put it. You started looking forward to things after you two met and eventually you actually started to feel a bit more deeply for poor crumpled man in the alley. It felt as if you’re body was being thawed out by this silver haired idiot who was groping for the clasp of your bra underneath your shirt.
So you climbed over the console, fumbling with the side of his chair to pull his seat back as you began to strip off your top in haste. You unbuttoned his jeans and slid down to the space between his leg, choking and drooling all over his cock because when you did you felt all these funny emotions bubbling in your body, you felt alive.
He was a loud mouth when you had his dick down your throat, groaning and saying the dumbest, lewdest shit his sex wired brain could think of. You know how many times he’s thought of this? You feel so good, you feel so good. God this is so good, Jashin probably loves it too... We should fuck on the hood of the car next. Long slender fingers guided your head up and down him as he began to twitch thrust his hips upwards, finally spill into your mouth. Douchebag didn’t let your head go and you felt some of his juices dribble down your tongue.
“Swallow it, swallow it while my dicks still in your mouth... Atta girl, you’re so good. So greedy..”
And you swallowed it all, he hoisted you back onto his lap and pushed your skirt up. He was whispering all this perverted stuff in your ear and your mouth fell open against his neck. Words making you flush fiercely and slowly grind your hips against him. You stopped him when he was beginning to shove your panties down your thighs, though.
For the first time you felt small in comparison to him as you met his eyes. He stopped his movement seeming like he was going to say something too, but you cut him off.
“- Hidan... I’ve never done it before.”
He stares at you all wide eyed before laughing and for a second and you think about getting out of his car and walking home because that’s such a douchebag thing to do, but then he surprises you.
“Me too, I was just about to say.. but I mean it can’t be hard right? Well, I am hard,” he laughed and you found yourself huffing a small giggle at his stupid joke, good mood returning as he continued, “I was just gonna go with what I seen in hentais.” That explained his dirty talk.
It was pretty good for your first time though. Ideally not the best place to have sex, you kept hitting your head and he couldn’t quite get his hips thrusting at a good pace with the confined space, but you didn’t care. You didn’t care because it was Hidan and you think you just might be in love with him.
That’s why you don’t say anything when a few weeks later you see “Shikamaru Nara, infamous street racer found dead in a back alley crash.” flashing across your tv screen.
You don’t comment, just give a little understanding hum when Hidan calls you and tells you he can’t pick you up tonight babe, or for a few nights, Jashin needs some repairs..
It’s why now, as he speeds through the streets recklessly with your bags in the trunk and the sound of sirens ringing in your ears that you feel tears prick your eyes. You wish you could have told him to be more careful, that he shouldn’t have done what he did without planning it. Something, anything.. it’s too late now. But he’s not to blame.
You think it’s your fault, really.
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menalez · 2 years
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Quite frankly I think you should be able to say he’s an asshole if you want. Unreservedly. There is no debt to a man defending a woman from another man for one thing. It is expected every person defend another against rapists that’s the floor, not the bar for debt. And especially not when it’s almost a given he’s doing it protecting his property/dibs ... I feel bad saying it in a way because I don’t want to act like I know everything about it but also child porn?? Fetishising your age regressing?
To speak to my own experience my relationship with my dad is complicated. He defended me against so much. Effectively and with passion. I would be dead without his defense. But he also had specific ideas about what “I” was to be ... so was it really me he defended? Or His Obedient Daughter? Did he even know or see me? The answer is yes and no. The situation is as I said and he was truly corrupted by it. But also despite everything even someone fully embracing the life and mind of an oppressor is human. They have qualities and interests and will be gentle and kind at times. They can relate to your humanity and feel love and express it truly and feel entitled possession and rapidly, regularly, lose all sense of your humanity too. So then you’ve got yo defend yourself. But when you do suddenly it’s the human person looking back at you asking why you’re so hateful and bitter, so ungrateful, why not give peace a chance? Maybe it was you who made him bad. And on and on. When I think of what makes people on the receiving end of these relationships “crazy” I think of that.
im in a weird like back & forth on my own situation, sometimes i recognise he was wrong regardless of what good he may have done and feel an anger towards him. other times i feel guilty and like i should cut him some slack bc he was a teenager too, and teenagers are dumb and naive and maybe just maybe he didnt know better. since im also open about it, people on here will use aspects of this situation to place me as the bad guy and position me as a liar trying to make people think hes a bad person when hes just a poor wittle guy that got corrupted by me (and then on another hand there are people who take my story and change it up a bit saying i was groomed by an adult pedo), which doesn't help me process the situation fully & move forward from it tbh. but yeah theres things i know are clearly wrong now, such as him fetishising my age regressing (i was so dumb back then that when he confessed that to me, i was like "ohh u know thats a thing in bdsm called ddlg!" which resulted in him getting into that n roping me in) or the child porn stuff (his story was that he had a strange app on his phone, he opened it, saw horrific child porn and he was so shocked he kept scrolling and within a few minutes he was caught by US authorities and paid a fine for viewing child porn or sth. i first talked 2 someone about it years later and they basically told me thats not how it works and that he must've been looking on multiple occasions & for a prolonged period). he'd also get me drugs and would ask the dealers for something that'd make me want to have sex with him, which he would admit to me later on if his plan failed. so many red flags n looking back this was still good bc, as i said, he did stand up for me against my rapist. and he didnt like outright rape me. and i was so desperate for some sort of support that i felt obligated to him in many ways. at least now i have enough self-respect that im not willing to be with somene out of obligation/duty/fear/etc and rather bc im into them, and i certainly understand now that theres better ways 2 protect myself from SA than just 'dont say no'......but that wasn't always the case.
i can relate to what u said about ur dad and ive faced the same w many people in my life, esp the thoughts of "maybe i made this person bad" but ur definitely right. even the worst person is human and has some good to them and i struggle to understand that still.
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