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sunlight-moonrise · 4 years

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Satisfied Curiosity (Reid Imagine)

Summary: Bartender!Reader does everything she can to get the cute FBI agent’s attention.

A/N: This wasn’t suppose to be so long or late, but my mind got the best of me. Big Thanks to @spencer-reid-in-a-pool and @reidetic for being amazing Betas (you guys are precious!). This story would be utterly unintelligible without them. Also thank you to everyone who showed love to my first fic. I didn’t expect for it to receive half of the attention it was given. I’m super grateful and I hope to provide more for you all. Enjoy!

Category: Smut

Content Warnings: Sexting, Oral (Male Receiving), Fingering, Penetrative Sex, Rough Sex, Degradation

Word Count: 9.1K (sorry, not sorry)

Masterlist

I’d like to think that I’m able to read people pretty well. Since working as a bartender for the past five years, I can examine an individual and have their personality down pat. Facial expressions, body language, posture, gestures. All these things are basically words to a story that I am able to put together.

My thought process was cut off when I noticed these two guys sitting at the end of the bar. I regarded them momentarily. They don’t look like the typical bar patron, their clothing a little too unseemly for a place like this. They were surveying the area as if looking for something.

I got a side profile of the tan Hispanic man. He had dark curly hair and trimmed facial hair. He was talking lowly to the man he was sitting with, their eyes still skimming all over their surroundings. I couldn’t get a good look at the other guy since his back was to me.

They sat tall, their bodies alert to any movement. It was as if it was their first time at a bar, but I know they were not uncomfortable here. There were no jittery movements from what I can see; no telltale signs that they were nervous. They also were not paying much attention to the people around them, focusing more on random spots within the place. Weird. Are they inspectors? Nah, that can’t be. Drew always gives us a heads up when visitors come. Plus, we got checked a few weeks ago.

The two finally turned towards my direction, and I was able to see the other guy. Wow, he was hot. Like very hot. Loose brown curls sat wildly on his head, looking as if he just rolled out of bed. He had a light stubble going on, highlighting the sharpness of his jaw. Damn, I bet I’d cut myself just touching it. He had a beautiful pair of pink lips. I quickly turned my attention to his left hand, noticing the lack of a ring. No wife, good. Now I need to make sure he doesn’t have a girlfriend or fiancée waiting for him at home.

I trailed my eyes upward, noticing that he was staring at me as well. I felt my face heat up when I saw him smirk. Damn, he caught me checking him out. His companion was also looking at me expectantly. They probably have been trying to get my attention for a while now, most likely to order some drinks. I made my way towards them, smoothing my hands over my jeans.

“Evening fellas, would you like to see a menu?” I asked as I placed some napkins in front of them.

“No thanks, but my partner and I would like to ask you some questions…” said the Hispanic man with a small pause. He quickly looked at my name tag before looking back at me “…(Y/N)”

The fuck? Partners? I didn’t think they were a couple. I did a quick glance over at them. Two Alpha males in a relationship rarely ever work out. They were not physically close to one another either. Sigh, you always fall for the ones you can’t get.

I didn’t answer them, still mentally distraught over this taken man. I’m sure they took my silence as confusion because the Hispanic man went on to explain, “I’m Luke Alvez and this here is Dr. Spencer Reid,” they flashed their badges, showing me some credentials. “We’re with the FBI.” Oh. I glanced toward Dr. Reid, a smile tugging on my lips. Score, we’re back in business.

I figured I might be here for a while so I got myself comfortable. Well, as comfortable as I can get standing behind a bar. I leaned towards them, my hands resting on the bar top. “Well, in that case, fire away.”

“Have you noticed any males here who arrived by themselves? This man likely sits alone, only interacts with women. He presents himself as a charming gentleman. His head would be facing downwards if he were sitting at the bar and he would probably wear some kind of hat to shield himself,” asked Luke.

“That’s roughly 50% of my male patrons, you’ll have to be more specific.”

“Yea, I should have figured that is not much to go by.”

I turned my attention back to the doctor who has yet to say a word, noticing that he was once again looking at random spots around the bar. “Your friend here is awfully quiet.”

At my comment, Spencer finally looked at me. I am sure that time stopped as his honey-colored eyes stared deeply into my own. If it wouldn’t come off strange, I’d stared at them all day.

He eventually turned away from me, “This place has a lot of blind spots.” He pointed to one corner by the back and another near the billiards table. It took a moment for me to comprehend what he was saying since I was distracted by the sound of his voice. He could probably recite Shakespeare and I’d think it was erotica.

He continued talking, oblivious of my swooning. “The man we are looking for does not want to be seen, he’ll know where to be so that the camera can’t spot him. He’ll likely bring the woman he’s talking to there or even over there,” he pointed to another spot, this time it was a small crook partially hidden behind a wall.

“The area by the restroom entrance also has no camera at all so he’ll possibly spend some time there as well,” he finished.

“I’d think I’ll notice some creep hanging near the bathrooms all night,” I remarked. “However, we have a security room in the back if you want to look over some footage.” I pointed to a door opposite the kitchen’s entrance.

“That’ll be very useful, thanks,” Luke reached into his pocket and took out his phone. He turned to Spencer saying “I’ma call Garcia, see if she can run some facial recognition on this guy.” With that, he walked to the security room.

I focused my attention back on Spencer, hoping he’ll stay here a bit longer. “May I ask you a question?”

“You just did,” he said, the damn smirk on his face once again. Smartass.

“Haha, I’m serious,” He didn’t say anything, which I took as my cue to continue. “What exactly does someone like you do in the FBI?”

“Someone like me?” he repeated.

“Well, you do not look like a typical agent,” I stated, and he just raised a single eyebrow at me. “Not to say that you’re probably bad at your job. I’m sure that you’re amazing at whatever it is that you do. I’d just like to know exactly what it is. Like what does your job entail…” Great, out of all times for my motor mouth to talk off, it chose this moment.

Spencer didn’t say anything and the awkward pause was killing me. I wanted to grab his gun and shoot myself in the foot. He probably thought I was insulting him. He continued to watch me as I fidgeted under his stare.

Finally, he decided to show me some mercy. “I use psychology to profile and find people,” he put it simply.

“That’s it?” I questioned.

“Pretty much,” he stated evenly, focusing his attention on the napkin in front of him. His body was slightly tenser than before, telling me that he was uncomfortable. I decided to drop the topic.

I scanned his being in an attempt to find something, anything that would allow me to continue talking to him. He beat me to it. “Which Sherlock portrayal are you a fan of?”

I was momentarily confused as to how he knew I was a fan. “Um, I started watching BBC’s Sherlock but I find the books to be much more interesting than the show. Are you a fan?”

“Of the books, yes. I haven’t had the chance to watch any of the series or films. I always find that reading offers a better experience. That’s a nice pin you have by the way.”

Pin? I looked down and remembered my “I am Sherlocked” pin clasped next to my name tag. Gosh, I feel like an idiot. Just when I was going to reply, I saw Luke stepping out of the security room.

I turned back towards Spencer, who was digging his hand into his pocket. He pulled out a card and gave it to me. “The number of the precinct we are helping is on here. If you have any further information, you should contact them.”

What, no. I don’t want him to leave yet. “But what if I want to talk to you more?”

“My number is on the back.” I flipped the card around and was greeted by a ten-digit code sprawled out in blue ink.

A smile adorned my face as I looked back at him. “How did you do that?” There’s not even a pen near his hands. Unless he carries all these cards with his number on it, which I severely doubt.

“You ask a lot of questions,” he stated.

“I’m a naturally curious person.”

He paused for a moment to dart his tongue across his lips. He made sure to look into my eyes before saying “You know that curiosity killed the cat.”

“But satisfaction brought it back.”

He gave a low laugh, “Touché.”

Just then Luke walked back to us, his phone to his ear. “C’mon man. The team needs us back at the station. There’s been another victim.”

“We’ll talk later,” Spencer said to me. My heart skipped a beat at his words. I felt like a kid who had a childhood crush.

Spencer got up and with one last glance at my direction, the two of them headed out the door.

Well, there goes the best part of my day. I’m being selfish wishing that he would have stayed behind. The man is here to find a criminal, not get his dick sucked. I folded the card and slid it into my pocket before grabbing a rag. These shot glasses aren’t going to clean themselves.

●The Next Day●

I spent the last few hours debating on whether or not I should text Spencer. I tried to distract myself with mundane activities. I watched TV, did my chores, even attempted to read a book, but nothing kept my interest. I grabbed the card that was sitting idly on my dresser, pondering on what to do.

You shouldn’t. But I’m bored and he’s cute. He’s an FBI agent for crying out loud. He got important things to do. What’s the worst that can happen? You could get arrested for obstruction of justice. Or I can get closer to him and find out more about him.

It is settled. I added Spencer’s number to my contacts and perched myself on my bed before sending a short text.

‘Hello Dr. Reid.’ I waited a minute, then two, then three, anxiously hoping for a response back. This was a bad idea, he’s probably at another bar trying to catch this guy. I should just delete his number and make myself a sandwich.

Right when I was going to do just that, my phone vibrated. I never opened my messages so fast in my life.

‘(Y/N). Is everything okay?’

A smile broke across my face as I pondered on what to send him. Should I keep everything cute and sweet? Nah. That’s boring. Should I send some salacious texts? No, he’ll probably think I am some kind of skank. Perhaps I should go for the playful persona?

I finally decided to type out a message, not wanting him to wait any longer. I don’t need him thinking that I’m in actual danger because I don’t know how to respond to a simple text.

‘I’m more than okay now that you’re here.’

I didn’t have to wait long before his next text came in. ‘Is there something that you need?’

Oh Spencer, if only you knew. However, what I want cannot be attained at the moment. I quickly typed across my keypad, ‘That’s a loaded question.’

Apparently he did not like that since his next reply was, ‘I don’t have time for this. I am working right now.’

Well shit, should I stop? Hell no, we are in too deep. Besides, he could always choose to ignore my messages instead of responding. And he did give me his number instead of just leaving me with the precinct’s. With that in mind, I typed out a text and quickly pressed send before I started second-guessing my choices again.

‘So you don’t want to talk to me?’

Again, I didn’t have to wait long for his next message to come through. ‘You should only contact me if you have information pertinent to the man we are looking for.’

That’s bullshit. Why give me your number if you didn’t want me to talk to you? ‘You said we’ll continue the conversation later. It’s later.’

‘Later, When I am not working.’ he clarified.

If I were a smart girl, I would have left this alone so that he could work peacefully. But I’m not. ‘All work and no play makes for a grumpy doctor. Don’t you want some entertainment?’

‘You’re acting childish.’

I couldn’t help but grin at his statement. If only he knew. Well, I could drop him a hint or two. ‘I’ve been compared to a brat before.’

‘I’m not surprised.’

‘I’m a glutton for punishment, agent.’

‘Do you want me to deliver?’

My breath caught in my throat. Could it be? Does Dr. Reid have a darker side to him? Or maybe I’m reading too deeply into this. I don’t care, I’m having too much fun at the possibility of this man having a more unhinged side to him. I wanted to see it. I decided to be cheeky with him, ‘You’d like that, wouldn’t you Sir.’

‘What are you trying to get at?’ One step forward and two steps back. I guess profiling and mind-reading are not one and the same if he has to ask me this. Or maybe he isn’t used to someone asking him to dick them down without outright saying they want him to dick them down.

‘I said it already, I just want to talk to you.’

It took a couple of minutes for his reply to come through. ‘We’ll talk later.’

I decided to give Spencer a break. I got what I wanted with his earlier comment. I ended everything with an ‘I’ll hold you to that,’ and put my phone down. I looked at the clock on my bedside table and saw that an hour had passed. I guess time really does fly when you’re having fun. I might as well start getting ready for work.

●●●

Four hours into my shift and the crowd near the bar was barely manageable. I’m not a big fan of working Friday evenings. I easily get annoyed with the sloppy drunks who think they could hook up with any of the workers but the tips usually make up for it at the end of the night.

I was grabbing some bottles of beer when all of a sudden I got a twisted feeling in my gut. I felt the hairs in the back of my neck stand up, and not in a good way. Call it a sixth sense, but I suspected that something was wrong, very wrong. I placed the bottles down and looked at the countless customers littered around the bar top. My eyes landed on this man who was giving off some creepy vibes.

I’d like to think I had a pretty good memory and this guy was definitely new. He was hunched over, eyes looking at the menu on the table. He was rapidly tapping his finger on top of the table, so I assumed he was feeling uneasy. Every once in a while, his head would peek up, as if he was searching the crowd for someone. He had a baseball cap on, the hat pressed tightly down on his head, his blond hair barely peeking through.

From what I can see he was attractive enough. A full-on beard decorated his face. He had on a leather jacket and a fitted shirt; seemingly trying to give off bad boy vibes. I started making my way towards him, “Is there anything you’d like to order?”

“That depends, are you on the menu?” Ugh. Gag. If I had a dollar for every time some Casanova wannabe used that line on me, I could pay for two months of my rent. He had a smile on his face that could be charismatic but I just found it downright disturbing.

“Food and drinks only. Sorry to disappoint.”

“That’s fine sweetheart, I’ll have whatever beer y’all got on tap.” As I walked away, I could feel his eyes leering at me. Should I text Spencer? No, I dealt with creeps before, this is nothing new.

I turned back to where Mr. Creepy Guy was previously sitting but he was no longer occupying the seat. Fuck. I took a look around the crowded pub, hoping to spot him. Fortunately, or unfortunately, depending on how you see it, I did. He was near the bathroom entrance talking to some girl who hardly looked like she could keep herself up.

Shit, I should get Spencer right now. I pondered on whether I should call him but figured that he wouldn’t be able to hear me over the volume of the crowd. I hurriedly pull my phone out of my pocket, trying my best to send the message as fast as my shaky hands can manage.

‘I’m pretty sure the man you’re looking for is here. You should bring some officers ASAP.’

Come on, Come on, Come on, have your cell on you. My phone vibrated, alerting me of a message. Oh thank god yes. ‘Are you serious?’ it read.

What the? Does he think I’m pranking him or something? I angrily typed on my screen, ‘This isn’t exactly something I will joke about Spencer.’

‘We’ll be there soon’ came his simple response. Okay, good. Now I just need to make sure that this guy doesn’t try to escape.

I looked back up and saw Mr. Creepy Guy still near the restrooms. One of his hands was holding on to the girl’s arm and I just knew he was trying to get her out of here. Spencer and company won’t arrive fast enough. I have to do something to make him stay longer.

I turned to my co-bartender, Manny, “I am going to take a 10 minute break.” I didn’t give him a chance to respond before I opened the small door dividing us from the crowd and made my way to Mr. Creepy Guy.

Once I got to the two of them, I spewed the first thing that came to mind, “Uh, excuse me. You um, forgot your drink. You know, the beer. That you ordered. At the bar earlier. About 10 minutes ago.” God, I looked like an idiot, but I couldn’t risk saying something that made him apprehensive.

Mr. Creepy guy sneered at me, “Yeah. I didn’t want it anymore.” Well, who shit in your cereal, mister. Oh right, that would be me. I gotta keep him a bit more distracted.

“Well if you order something, you gotta pay for it. Bar’s policy.” He continued to glare at me upset that I was being a cockblocker. Or more appropriately a murderblocker. Realizing that I wasn’t going away soon, he pulled a bill from his pocket before throwing it at me. Wow I wonder where his pleasant attitude disappeared to.

I turned my attention to this poor girl and noticed she wasn’t looking too good. I assumed she was drunk but she looked way off it; as if she had been drugged or something.

Fucking hell, she probably has been. She can’t stand on her own two feet and she could barely stop her eyes from drooping downwards.

“Your friend here doesn’t look too good,” I commented, my hand already going towards the arm he wasn’t currently holding on to.

“She’s fine. We were just about to leave, right Sarah?” he asked the girl. ‘Sarah’ didn’t say a word, too busy trying her best to not crash down on the floor.

“Nonsense, we can’t have you leaving in such a state, it would look bad on us,” I improvised. “We’ll give her something real quick to help sober her up.” I hastily scanned the room, spotting Hannah, one of my coworkers, a few feet away.

“Hey Hannah,” I shouted, garnering her attention. I gestured for her to come here and she started walking over. When she stood in front of us, I pried ‘Sarah’ out of Mr. Creepy Guy’s hold and gently ushered her into Hannah’s arms.

“This is Sarah and she’s not feeling all that well. Can you tell Manny to give her the Queen’s special?” Hannah instantly knew what was up. The Queen’s special is our code name for helping those who we believe are in an uncomfortable or dangerous situation. Most of the time, the person is coherent enough to ask for help, but for these kinds of scenarios we’ll have to rely on our own wits.

The two walked, or in Sarah’s case, stumbled away. Hannah managed to give Mr. Creepy Guy a glare which he openly returned in my direction. I gave him a small smile, hoping he didn’t get suspicious and try to leave.

“She’ll be right back, would you like that beer while you wait?” I asked.

“No, you did enough,” He jeered, taking slow steps back. I could have sworn he muttered ‘fucking bitch’ as he disappeared in the crowd, no doubt hightailing it out of here.

Crap, I should follow him. At least I’ll be able to tell the cops what direction he went or what his license plate number is. I started walking to the exit, shoving my way through the sweaty mass of people.

Once I got to the door, I pushed it open feeling the cool air hit my face. I looked around, trying to see if I could find Mr. Creepy Guy but to no avail. I walked a few steps down, searching to see if he went down an alley or something.

The place was eerily quiet and my nerves were starting to get the best of me. I suddenly felt a hand roughly grab my shoulder and let out an ear-piercing scream. I whirled around, my hand already in a fist to punch the living daylight out of this person.

Right when my hand was going to make contact, a hand closed around my fist. No problem, I’ll just kick you in the shin. My leg was about to leave the ground when I heard a stern “Calm down (Y/N).”

I know that voice. For the first time, I looked up and saw that it was Spencer behind me. I never realized beforehand how easily he towered over my form. He released my hand and I leaned my body against the wall next to me. The adrenaline from earlier leaving me.

“What the fuck Spencer, a little warning next time,” I angrily shouted at him. “You could have said my name before grabbing me or just tapped my shoulder. I don’t like being manhandled.”

“I severely doubt that,” he whispered. Wait, what. “Is the man still inside?” he asked in a louder voice than before.

“Um no. That’s the reason why I came out here. I was trying to find where he went.”

“And you decided to check an alleyway.” I casted my eyes down, paying attention to a piece of gravel on the floor. The tone of voice he was using made me feel as if I was in trouble. “Do you know what kind of danger you just put yourself in? What if it was him behind you instead of me just now?” he chastised.

“I was fighting back,” I retorted.

“And you were losing that fight. You had no weapon of any kind to help defend yourself. You are no match for a fully grown male who sees girls like you as nothing but property,” Spencer snapped.

I felt miffed that he was scolding me about my safety but a pathetic part of me was turned on as well. I decided to switch this conversation back to what was important. “He’s a Caucasian man. About 5’9 with dirty blonde hair and facial hair. He had a Salem Red Sox cap and a faux black leather jacket. Burgundy henley shirt with black washed jeans and white Adidas,” I recounted from my memory.

He recited everything word for word into his radio. “Go back inside, we’ll take care of it from here.”

“You’re fucking welcome by the way,” I sarcastically stated. Before I could blink, Spencer slammed his hands on either side of my head and was staring intently into my eyes. I felt my heart rate pick up instantly. I didn’t know whether to be scared or horny so my body decided on both.

He had a carnal look in his eyes and I felt a light shiver run down my spine. His tongue darted out, wetting his lips. It was as if it happened in slow motion, my eyes hungrily following the movement. He opened his mouth to speak and I was eagerly anticipating his words.

“Reid, come in. We need you for backup.” What the..? It was then that I noticed his comms were still on and one of his team members was trying to get his attention.

“Go back inside,” Spencer repeated, “We’ll continue this later.” Yeah fucking right. This is the third time you’ve told me this in the thirty hours I’ve known you. Nevertheless, I obeyed but it wasn’t because he told me; it was because I got paid by the hour and I was already gone for over fifteen minutes. At least that’s what I kept telling myself as I walked back inside.

I turned around to get a glimpse of his retreating form but he was already gone.

●●●

It was past midnight and I had about forty-five minutes left until my shift ended. The place was a lot emptier right now, which is pretty shocking. However, I’m guessing no one wanted to be around and get wasted when the cops were roaming about barely an hour ago.

I was pouring some shots for this couple when I felt a vibration in my pocket. I finished serving the duo before fishing my phone out, opening my messages straight away. ‘We caught the guy.’

I didn’t bother reading the name, knowing already who it was. Is it wrong of me to be a bit upset? I’m happy there’s one less criminal on the streets but I wanted to see Spencer some more.

Hmmm. There’s still a chance to make something happen, but I can’t mess it up. I quickly typed, ‘I should get a reward. I did help you catch the guy.’

I assumed that I’d have to wait a few minutes for him to respond but that was not the case. ‘And what is it that you want?’ It’s now or never.

‘You.’

I’m guessing he had his phone glued to him right now because his reply was immediate. ‘You don’t know who you’re dealing with.’

‘I’m not scared Spencer.’ If I didn’t know any better, I’d think he didn’t want me. But all the heated moments we had shared thus far had to have meant something.

‘You should be, I’m not the man that you need.’ was his reply.

I decided to be a bit cheeky, remembering that it gave me some results when I was messaging him earlier today. ‘You’re a man and I am in need, that’s more than enough for me. Save the rest for the pillow talk.’

I didn’t even get to put my phone down before his next text arrived. ‘This isn’t a good idea.’

Damn, this man is a hard nut to crack, but he has made me stubborn for him. I guess I’ll have to use my ultimate weapon.

Taking note of my surroundings, I dimmed the brightness of my phone and made sure to keep it close to my body. I don’t need any of the customers or coworkers to have a sneak peek into my secret album. I opened the app that holds all of my inappropriate photos, pondering on which one I should send to Spencer.

My eyes landed on one I took pretty recently. I’m not trying to sound conceited or anything but I looked fucking hot. It was erotic and sensual, but not overly so.

I was lying on my bed, one hand holding onto my chest while the other held the phone up. My fingers were spread apart, allowing for the taunt nipple of my left breast to peek out. The dim lighting of the lamp helped accentuate the curves of my body. The picture includes the lower half of my face, where I was biting down on my lower lip. I was wearing a white lacy thong that barely left anything for the imagination.

I quickly clicked on the photo and made it so that he’ll have to download the image before seeing it. I added the caption Warning, it’s a bit NSFW, before hitting send. Crossing my fingers, I hoped for a reply soon.

I waited and waited but my phone did not notify me of any new messages. Five minutes have passed and I was shit out of luck. Welp I tried. Now I gotta pick up my pride from the floor.

Suddenly, I felt my phone vibrate and I felt happiness immediately taking over. At first, I thought it was a text message, except the vibrations kept going and going. Realization hit me, it’s an incoming call. I grabbed it quickly, a small squeal leaving my mouth when I saw Spencer’s name appear. I accepted the call and put it towards my ear.

“Hello Dr. Reid, to what do I---“

“When does your shift end?” he interrupted. Well hot damn, no waiting around now huh.

“20 minutes,” came my simple reply.

“I’ll be outside,” and with that, he hung up the phone. Wow, I can’t believe that actually worked.

The next 20 minutes were by far the slowest time has ever went. I kept glancing at the clock, watching as each minute passed at a pain strikingly slow pace. Once it was 12:58 A.M, I already had my bag on my shoulder with my hand on the dividing door.

I made a quick mental check on the inventory I had in my purse. Wallet, check. Phone charger, check. Travel toothbrush, check. Bobby Pins, check. Condom, check. Deodorant, check. Extra panty, check. Yup, I’m ready. I’ve had too many spontaneous sleepovers to not be prepared for evenings like this.

I looked at the time and saw that it was finally 1:00 A.M. I zipped right out of here, making sure to shout my goodbyes as I made my way to the exit. Once out the door, I turned towards the corner and immediately spotted Spencer waiting for me.

I made my way towards him with the biggest smile on my face. “Hi, Spencer.”

“Get in,” he demanded.

“Why the haste?” I asked with a teasing tone behind my words.

“I’ve wasted enough time when it comes to you.” That’s a good enough reason for me. He got in the driver seat while I made my way to the passenger’s side, placing my bag on the floor near my feet.

“My house is a 20-minute drive,” I informed him. “You’ll just have to make a lef—“

“No,” he cut me off. “The hotel I am staying at is 10 minutes away from here.” And this is why I always pack the necessities.

“Alright, you’re in charge, Sir.”

Spencer didn’t respond to my little quip, choosing instead to turn the car on. Fine, play that game of yours. As soon as I put my seat belt on, he pulled out and started driving.

We’ve only been in the car for a couple of minutes before I got a bit antsy. I never did like quiet rides. I turned to him “What took you so long to get Mr. Creepy guy?”

His eyes fleetingly dashed towards my direction before focusing back on the road. “Who?”

“The man that you were looking for,” I clarified.

“We had to be sure it was him,” he stated.

“My description wasn’t enough for you.”

“It was helpful but we had to be certain. He eventually confessed to the crimes while under custody.”

“Oh,” I said. “Umm do you have a girlfriend?” A girl gotta make sure that she wasn’t becoming a homewrecker.

“A. What,” he asked. I’m pretty sure he heard me but I repeated myself anyway.

“A girlfriend. Or a boyfriend. Somebody waiting for you at home?”

“I do not. I am not in a committed relationship.”

“That’s cool. Neither am I if you’re wondering,” I said. “So did you like my picture?” Apparently, my mouth does not know when to stop. Although I must admit, I’m curious to know what he thought of it.

We stopped at a red light and he gazed at me before saying “I was with my team when I got your little message. They were wondering why I got quiet all of a sudden.” I would have laughed if he didn’t have such a dark look on his face. “I did not appreciate their curiosity as to what was going on.” The light turned green, and he started driving faster now. Do FBI agents get speedy tickets for booty calls?

“Does that mean you did not like it?”

Spencer didn’t respond and I was about to ask him something else when I realized the car was parked. Oh we’re here, that was fast. He got out and went to open my door for me.

“Wow, what a gentleman.” Still no response from him. I picked up my bag and hopped out while he closed the door behind me. He made sure to lock it before grabbing my hand and leading me to the hotel’s entrance.

I couldn’t even appreciate the interior of the place since Spencer was dragging me to the elevators. He finally spoke after pressing the button for the doors to open. “I’m giving you one more chance to turn back.”

“And miss out on the fun, no way.”

The doors to the lift opened and we stepped inside. They didn’t even close fully before he pushed me against the wall and crashed his lips against mine. Fuck, the moan that left my body was embarrassingly loud; I am sure the receptionists heard it.

I went to put my arms around Spencer’s neck but he grabbed my hands and pinned them to the wall before my fingers could even touch his shoulder. His knee drew my legs apart, resting in between my thighs. A shudder ran through me, which caused him to tighten his hands around my wrists. I liked that he was releasing the wilder side of him; the side that he kept hidden from others.

He sucked my bottom lip between his and bit down on it. Instinctively, I opened my mouth which he took as a green light to plunge his tongue inside. It was sloppy, it was raunchy, but I loved it.

I was about to start grinding my pelvis against his knee when the elevator doors dinged open. As quickly as he came upon me, he pulled apart. Spencer grabbed my hand once again and tugged me down a hallway. After a few steps, we stopped in front of the door and he went to grab his key from his pocket.

I took the moment to admire him. He was still wearing what I assumed to be his work clothes. His hair looked even more messy than usual. I’d like to think that he was running his hands through it while debating on what to do with me. His eyes seemed darker, no longer the honey orbs I was captivated by the day prior. Nonetheless, they were still beautiful. His lips, my god those lips of his. Puffed out and more pink than normal. I just wanted to kiss him again.

Spencer opened the door to his room holding it open for me. Once we were inside, with the door fully closed this time, he pulled me into another hungry kiss. One of his hands held my face as the other landed on my waist. I dropped my purse on the floor, my hands promptly losing themselves in his hair.

My mouth immediately opened up, wanting to feel his tongue pressed alongside mine once more. He used the hand that was holding my waist to pull me closer until I was flushed against his body. I felt hot. Too hot. I wanted to rip off my clothes and his at this very moment.

Suddenly his face pulled away, much to my disappointment. We were trying to catch our breath as we looked at one another.

“I want you on your knees,” he rasped. I’d love nothing more but we wouldn’t be here if I were obedient.

“And if I say no?” I asked.

“Don’t pretend you’re some kind of bad girl because we both know that is far from the truth.”

“Your profiling skills need some work if you think I am a good girl who follows the rules.”

He tightened his grip on my waist. “I never said you were a good girl.”

“Then what am I?”

“You’re a cock hungry dirty whore who is going to get on her knees or be bent over mine. Your choice.” Well, who am I to argue against such logic. Although the idea of being spanked by him is exciting, I rather see him come undone by me. And on me.

I slowly sunk down to my knees as Spencer started removing his belt and unbuttoning his slacks. I helped him drag his pants and boxers down, low enough to unveil his hard dick. My mouth salivated at the sight of him and I pressed my thighs closer together. Maybe I am a cock hungry dirty whore.

I placed one hand on him, feeling the heated skin against my cooler palm. His dick gave a slight twitch at the difference in temperatures. I closed my hand, delighted by the fact that I couldn’t fit my whole first around his cock. Leaning forward, I placed a small tentative kiss on the head. I glanced up, seeing that he had his poker face on.

Now that wouldn’t do, I want to see Spencer Reid lose control because of me.

I pulled my hand back and brought it to my face. I licked the length of my palm before placing it at the base of his cock again. My opposite hand settled on his thigh to help balance myself. I leaned forward once more and lightly licked the tip before placing it inside my mouth. I sucked gently while firmly grasping the base. He rewarded me with a small grunt.

I moved down, slowly taking him inch by inch. I made sure to get him as wet as I can while gliding my lips against him. My hand pumped the remaining length that couldn’t fit in my mouth. He started to become more and more erect.

“You like this don’t you?” Spencer groaned out, “You’re such a filthy slut for me.” How is it possible that the sound of his voice is making me aroused? He placed his hands on my hair, fisting his fingers among the locks.

I moaned at his words, bobbing my head up and down at a faster pace. I moved my hand to cup his sac, giving him a gentle massage between my fingers. He gave out a choked sound as he started to slowly thrust his hips.

I drew back and kissed my way down his cock until my lips met my hand. I placed my mouth on one of his balls and gave one a light suck before running my tongue around it. “Fucking hell,” Spencer loudly exclaimed, as I returned the same ministrations to the neglected one.

I pulled away with a small pop and dragged my tongue from base to tip. My eyes looked up at him, and the sight was sexy as fuck. His mouth was opened as he was trying to catch his breath, his face slightly flushed. There was a light sheen of sweat on his forehead and the veins on his neck were more prominent.

I made sure Spencer’s eyes landed on mine as I wrapped my lips around his now full length. He started thrusting more earnestly this time as my hand went back to massaging his balls. I continued eye contact as I bobbed my head up and down on his cock.

He tightened his hands on my hair harshly, which made me more wet. Great, on top of being a cock whore, I am a pain whore. This man is bringing the worst out of me and I’m loving it.

I made sure to hollow my cheeks and swirl my tongue around his head every time I returned back up. I didn’t think I’d have this much fun with a cock in my mouth. Once I dipped my tongue against his slit and firmly clasped my hand over his sac, it was over for him.

Spencer took over and held my head in place as he started to thrust within me. I tried my best to maintain eye contact, despite the tears swelling up. My other hand clutched at the skin of his thigh, raking my nails over him. His groans were a sweet symphony to my ears. Just when I thought he was about to release himself, he stopped and pulled away from me.

“Why’d you stop?” I pouted, my lips feeling very sensitive as they moved against each other.

He panted heavily and loudly, “I don’t want to cum yet.” I couldn’t stop myself from smiling at the sight of him. He was a mess and it was all because of me.

“But I wanted to taste you.” My hand went back to grab him but he stopped me with a sharp tug of my hair.

“Behave or you won’t get a reward for sucking my dick so well,” he said flatly.

Ohh, I’m curious as to what a reward from Spencer Reid entails. He pulled me up and I had to place my hands on his chest for balance. As my legs were regaining feeling, he was staring at my face. I can already imagine what he sees. Tear stained face with puffy eyes and swollen lips. Apparently, he liked the sight because he pulled me into another kiss.

This one was much more tender than our previous kisses. His lips were soft, as if afraid they would irritate my already swollen ones. His hands cradled my head, gently tilting it up so he has better access. His tongue swirled against mine and I was surprised he wasn’t repulsed by his taste on me. So many guys would find this to be disturbing.

Spencer slowly pulled away from me. He looked into my eyes as he said, “I want you to strip then bend over the bed.”

“What if I don’t?” His once gentle hands on my face are now gripping my cheeks, making my lips pucker. He continued to stare at me and it took everything within me not to moan at his actions.

“I think you know what would happen if you don’t, do you really want that?” As much as I would have loved to mess with him some more, I did not want it at the expense of my orgasm. I’m too horny to be acting recklessly.

I started stepping away from him, doing as he requested. I would have taken my time removing my clothes, but I was too impatient. As I pulled down my panties, I noticed how damp they were. This man has made me wanton and soaked without even touching me yet.

I went over to the bed, placing myself in the desired position. The bed was tall enough where my feet were still firmly on the floor but I didn’t need to bend my knees to keep my stomach flat against the mattress.

I watched Spencer strip out of his clothes, making note of the mismatched socks he had on. Aww cute. Once he was bare, he walked up behind me and placed his hands on my hips. For a few seconds, he did nothing while I was readily anticipating his next move.

Finally, I felt his hand cup my mound and I gasped at the feeling. “You’re so wet. All of this because you had my cock in that dirty mouth of yours.” I shuddered at his words, the hairs on my arm rising up.

He started rubbing at my lower lips, spreading the arousal that has already formed all over me. “You have nothing to say now that I got my hands on you huh,” he continued, stroking his fingers against my core.

Just when I was about to say something, he sunk a single finger inside me. I inhaled sharply and buried my head into the sheets. I tried my best to move against him but the hand resting on my hip kept me at bay. He was methodical with his actions, pressing his finger against my walls as he moved in and out.

“Your pretty little cunt is taking my finger so well. You think you can handle another one?” I still couldn’t reply to him, too busy trying to even out my breathing. He then entered another finger. I moaned as he started diligently working those dexterous digits inside of me. My pussy was throbbing while he was working wonders.

A loud moan was torn out my body as Spencer’s fingers curled against my G-spot. “Oh you liked that, dirty girl,” he growled out. He curled his fingers once again and I let out an equally loud whine. He continued this every time he returned his fingers back inside of me; my throat releasing a moan whenever he did so. You’d think with all the time I spent staring at his hands that I’d be ready for him but that’s a big no.

My body was warming up and I could feel the heat pooling within me. I was a goner when a third finger entered me. He tightened his hand on my hip and I prayed that it would leave marks. I wanted to admire the bruises when this was all over.

I closed my eyes and tried to focus on the pleasure racking my body. I was so close to finding my release. The way I was pulsating around his fingers was a telltale sign that I was upon my release.

“You want to come, dirty girl, you want to come all over my hand?” he fiercely whispered. All I could do was nod against the comforters, my voice long gone by now.

I felt myself pulse and tighten around him. With just one more curl of his fingers, I was about to climax. But he suddenly pulled out and released me.

“What the fuck?” I screeched, voice coming back with a vengeance. “You said I was going to get rewarded you teasing bastard.”

“And you are. Now shut up before I change my mind.” For once, I stayed quiet, only because I really wanted an orgasm. It is the least he could do after making me all hot and bothered.

I turned my head back, wanting to see what Spencer would do next. I whimpered when I saw him put his fingers in his mouth, licking my essence off of him. I watched as he took his time, my pussy continuing to throb at the sight.

“You taste pretty good for such a whore,” he remarked once he was done. I saw him walk towards the nightstand and grab a foil packet. Excitement coursed through my veins, my body barely staying still.

He was behind me once again, and I was ready for him. I felt him rub the head against my lips, pressing down when it met my clit. He continued doing this, moving up and down against me, making sure to coat himself in my arousal. I started to wiggle my hips against him, hoping to gain some more friction.

A loud moan was torn out of my throat when Spencer suddenly grabbed my hips and buried himself inside my pussy. He let out a groan as he stilled within me. We had a moment to adjust to one another before he started rocking against me. He was hitting me deep, touching places that I didn't know were possible.

“Spencer, you feel so fucking good,” I mewled out, enjoying the feel of his cock against my walls.

He kept a steady rhythm, making sure to pull halfway out before pushing back in. Small moans left my mouth as I tried my best to return his thrusts. His hands on my hips did not allow for much movement, reminding me that he was the one in charge of my pleasure.

My body moved rhythmically against the bed, my sensitive nipples rubbing against the sheet, adding to this blissful feeling. I was burning up from the sensations wrecking my body.

“I want you to touch yourself,” Spencer growled out. I let my hand trailed down my stomach but paused when they got to my lower abdomen. I felt a bump form at my lower abdomen every time he entered me, which only added to my desire. I tightened around him and he let out a groan before giving me a powerful thrust as a warning.

My hand continued its descent to my clit, fingers rubbing against it once they met. Spencer increased the pace, slamming his hips against my ass. My legs started to tremble, my orgasm looming over my body. My hand continued to play with my clit while the other gripped the sheets tightly. I bit down on the comforter, trying my best to quiet down my moans.

One of Spencer’s hands grabbed my hair and pulled my head up. “None of that, I want to hear you. I want everyone in this hotel to know what a filthy little bitch you are. My filthy little whore,” he grunted out.

It was all too much for me. His voice, his cock, his hands. I felt wave after wave of pleasure as my release washed over me. I cried out his name; submitting to the ecstasy my body was experiencing. My muscles went limp as I attempted to return air into my lungs.

I heard Spencer grunt as my pussy pulsed and creamed around him but that did not stop his relentless pace. “Keep touching the clit of yours, I want you to come one more time.”

“I can’t,” I whimpered. I was still recovering from the powerful orgasm I just had. I won’t be able to have another one so soon.

But Spencer Reid was nothing if not diligent. “You can and you will.”

His hand that was in my hair joined mine between my legs. His fingers were so much better than mine. He pressed firmly against my clit, keeping a steady motion against me. He snapped his hips harder, the slight pain making me feel that familiar coil in my stomach.

“I know you have one more in you for me. I want you to give it to me” he uttered. I’m not sure how he is able to do it, but I felt my body start rising again.

“Sp-Spencer. Please.” I didn’t know what I was begging for as I stammered those words out. His hand between my legs pressed harder and his rhythm against me started wavering. I knew he was close to his release, but I was right there with him.

When he pinched my clit firmly against his fingers, I mewled out his name once more. The coil snapped and I couldn’t help the way I trembled once more. My body quaked against his as the shock waves overcame me. I felt as if lightning was running across my nerves.

Spencer thrusted three more times before tensing against me. I felt him jerk and spill himself inside of me. He dropped down, pressing his chest against my back and whispering my name in my ear. We both tried to catch our breaths as we came down from our high.

After a few minutes, Spencer pulled out of me and walked to a door which I assumed led to the bathroom. I’m guessing he went to dispose of the condom. I continued to lie on the bed, trying my best to catch my breath. My body was still on an all-time high, still reeling from the aftershocks of my climax. I fought against the drowsiness of my eyes, wondering how the hell I am going to stay alert on the cab ride home.

“How are you feeling?” I couldn’t even jump in surprise. I had no idea he returned and was standing right next to me. “I wasn’t too rough?”

“Best. Sex. Ever,” I drowsily responded. Spencer picked me up and maneuvered my body so that I was lying on my back. He grabbed a bottle that was standing on the nightstand; squeezing some cream into the palm of his hand. He rubbed his hands together and started massaging the lotion onto my legs. He focused his attention on my knees and thighs.

“Do you want some water? He asked. I nodded my head and he immediately went to the snack bar area. He grabbed a bottle and what looks to be a granola bar. He uncapped the bottle and gently fed the water to me.

“Do you want some food,” I shook my head at his question. “Is there anything else I can do for you?”

“Cuddles” came my whispered response. Spencer smiled at me before settling on the bed next to me. He draped the blankets over our bodies and wrapped his hand over my waist, pulling me close.

“Goodnight Spencer.”

“Goodnight (Y/N).”

The last thing I felt was the press of his lips against my neck as my body surrendered itself to the sweet bliss of slumber.

#spencer reid #spencer reid fanfiction #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid imagine #spencer reid smut #criminal minds fanfiction #criminal minds #criminal minds smut #smut #dr spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid x y/n #spencer reid x you #spencer reid reader insert #mgg #reid smut

2K notes · View notes

im-glad-you-found-us-alison · 2 years

Text

I posted 150 times in 2021

36 posts created (24%)

114 posts reblogged (76%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 3.2 posts.

I added 64 tags in 2021

#the owl house - 10 posts

#gustholomule - 10 posts

#violetsfavmusicalquotes - 9 posts

#toh - 9 posts

#mattholomule - 5 posts

#hamilton - 5 posts

#gus porter - 5 posts

#lumity - 4 posts

#the owl house gus - 4 posts

#leerens - 3 posts

Longest Tag: 72 characters

#so basically i’m mainly the gus posts and they are mainly the matt posts

My Top Posts in 2021

I just need to say: I hate when people take Amity and make her character “Gay mess lol” like no. Was her arc all for nothing?

(edit: just adding that I don’t hate lumity or think it’s overrated, it’s what got me looking at the owl house in the first place. I just want people to give amity some more personality in fan made media)

45 notes • Posted 2021-06-20 13:18:54 GMT

“Thank you so much!” Gustholomule prompt (kinda) by @pepper1

“Okay, okay, okay, okay. It’s fine, it’s fine. You two are.. friends now! We won’t think it’s weird, unlike that one.. time… ugh.”

I’m standing behind one of the walls of Hexside School of Magic and Demonics. In my hands I held a small box with holes in the top, my heart beating faster every second.

“Just.. give it to him, you don’t have to say anything weird just give him the present, Matt, dammit!!”

“Uh, Mattholomule? Are you alright?”

Speaking of the devil.. well more like angel…

I turned around quickly, almost stumbling as I put the box behind my back.

“U-uhuh..”

“Oh okay, I thought I heard yelling..”

Oh no, hopefully he doesn’t suggest it being me..

“Oh, hm confusing.. I heard it too.. haha…” I laughed, wanting to just disappear into the the uneven ground.

“Well, what’s that?” He pointed to my back, trying to peek around.

Here’s your chance Mattholomule, just give it to him! NOW

“W-well I wanted to…gift you s-something..” Real smooth, huh..

“Hm, really?”

“Uh, yeah!” I nodded a bit too enthusiastically.

I continued. “So.. I happened to h-hear you and Luz talking about how much you love frogs, so I..”

I revealed the box, trying not to force it too aggressively at Augustus.

His eyebrows raised and his teeth stopped biting his lip in anticipation.

“No way! Did you!?”

It hit me, maybe I ready the conversation wrong. Maybe they were speaking some form of human code, agh!

“Wait, are you mad, you probably are.. I’m sorry..”

His face fell slightly but bounced back up.

“No, no! I’m just.. shocked, but please of course and WOW!”

He carefully and gently took the box from me and gave the content of the box an adorable smile after opening it. I felt like I could die.

“Thank you so much, Matt!” He squealed, running up to me as I tried to process everything, including the nickname that came from out of the blue..

Then he hugged me.

OH MY LORD JUST STAY CALM MATTHOLOMULE OR MATT I GUSSS JUST HUG HIM BACK OR IS THAT WEIRD I DONT KNOW JUST STAY CALM-

The End

50 notes • Posted 2021-07-02 21:40:44 GMT

“It’s adorable!” - Gustholomule

So you remember those fake artefacts you brought to that H.A.S meeting?”

“Oh yeah, you threw them away didn’t you?”

Gus looked from side to side funnily and let out a small giggle.

“Oh, they’re in my bedroom, on my desk. I can bring them tomorrow if you’d like.”

Mattholomule was touched, and his face reflected this sincerely.

“Oh that’s fine, I was just asking I don’t need them anymore, you can keep them.. in your bedroom, on your.. desk…”

His cheeks were darkened but Gus didn’t notice, he didn’t seem to be saying or hearing anything Matt was saying. His eyes seemed to be fixed on the other boys forehead, his eyes slightly squinted and his face overall being intrigued. The sight was almost too cute for Mattholomule to comprehend.

“W-what are you l-looking at Gus?” He stuttered, swallowing awkwardly.

Saying nothing, Gus extended his arm and reached to his friends head, accidentally touching his cheeks in the process.

“Uh, G-Gus what are you doing?” Mattholomule’s face resembled a really red tomato but he didn’t lean his head or body back at all.

Gus’ arm reached its target and started to curl around and play with the ahoge hidden most of the time underneath Matt’s hood that had been recently revealed in that moment.

“Ooo! Pointy hair!!” He giggled, shuffling closer so he could start bouncing the mentioned ahoge.

“Oh.. that… heh..”

“Why is it always hidden? It’s adorable!”

That almost did it for Matt who gets shrugged, looking at his lap with his eyes widened awkwardly.

Gus read this movement wrong and took his hand away, moving back.

“Sorry, did you not want me to do that? I’m sorry was it uncomfortable?”

Matt made eye contact with the boy, whose eyes were sympathetic and apologetic. He didn’t like that look.

“N-no, you can play w-with it..” Matt confirmed, putting his head up again and bounced his own hair slightly.

“Thanks a lot, Matt! You should stop wearing your hood so often so people can see it!”

“O-okay Gus…”

75 notes • Posted 2021-07-02 20:20:04 GMT

Gus Headcanon:

I feel like Gus would love to learn glyphs since he loves human things and that’s the way humans can perform magic.

89 notes • Posted 2021-06-26 08:42:22 GMT

I found the base but not sure who it’s by, I’ll edit this post when I find out

This is who I’m PAN for!!!“ -Gus

232 notes • Posted 2021-08-15 14:08:36 GMT

Get your Tumblr 2021 Year in Review →

#my 2021 tumblr year in review #your tumblr year in review

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tigerkirby215 · 3 years

Text

5e Akali, the Rogue Assassin build (League of Legends)

(Artwork by Jessica “OwleyCat” Oyhenart. Made for Riot Games)

(Shit meme by yours truly.)

I mean honestly it’s about time I go around to this. With the year nearing its end (thank fuck) here’s a build I had planned pretty much since the Soulknife subclass was shown. Yeah spoilers I guess Akali’s a Soulknife Rogue because she throws a shit load of knives. No she isn’t an assassin, despite the name of “Rogue Assassin.”

GOALS

You can never have too many kunai - We need a hell a lotta kunai and shurikens to throw at our enemies. Remember that part where I said “Akali’s a Soulknife Rogue?”

Smoked 'em - We’ll need to be able to turn invisible and stay invisible while still being able to hit our foes.

Quick and deadly - You’re quick and deadly like a ninja, with dashes over and around just about everything and swift executions. Almost like you are a ninja.

RACE

Akali is a human, no matter how much training in stealth, spirits, and singing she has. She is however from the magic land of Ionia filled with magic people, and since she probably got some spiritual training from Shen I figured that’s good enough justification for me to grab a Dragonmark! A Mark of Passage Human gets a +2 to Dexterity and a +1 to another ability score: we’ll go for Charisma for K-Pop stans. You can also learn a language of your choice and Sylvan makes sense to speak to the spirits.

You have a Courier's Speed for +5 feet of movement and can add a d4 to Acrobatics or motorcycle land vehicle checks thanks to Intuitive Motion. But the main feature of note is Magical Passage for Misty Step in your pocket once per Long Rest. You know me: gotta have Flash available.

If Dragonmarks aren’t an option: Variant Human with +1 to DEX and +1 to CHA is good enough. Take the Mobile feat at level 1 instead of later in the build, and perhaps invest in Fey Touched or something when the time comes for that feat I don’t know.

ABILITY SCORES

15; DEXTERITY - You run and jump around and throw a lot of knives. Almost like a ninja.

14; CONSTITUTION - Be it Gunblade or Riftmaker, Akali is deceptively survivable. That and even ability scores are nice.

13; CHARISMA - Charisma is tied to performance for Korean raps in whatever band you joined this time. Look I’m not saying I want Akali in Pentakill but...

12; WISDOM - Shen tries to teach you a lot of Wisdom and I’m sure at least some of it got through to you.

10; STRENGTH - ‘Kali got abs. Being a ninja requires 100 push ups, 100 sit ups, and a 10 kilometer run every single day.

8; INTELLIGENCE - Ninjas don’t normally have a good math and science program. The answer to how many kunai you brought is “yes.”

BACKGROUND

While you may have once been part of the Kinkou Order you have since decided to go rogue. When you’re part of a ninja organization killing people is cool, but if you do it on your own you’re just a Criminal. You get proficiency in Stealth but I’m going to suggest replacing your Deception proficiency with Arcana for some teachings thanks to Master Shen. You also get proficiency in Thieves’ Tools (though if you want to min-max I’d perhaps swap this out for something out) but I’m going to suggest replacing your gaming set with a Disguise Kit, because my lord Akali has a lot of skins.

Be it your old connections from the Kinkou Order or a new informant for assassination contracts you have a Criminal Contact that can easily supply info, and who you always have a direct line to. They send the target, you get the kill.

(Artwork by Alvin Lee, Pan Chengwei, and Bo “chenbowow” Chen. Artwork made for Riot Games.)

THE BUILD

LEVEL 1 - ROGUE 1

wOw ThE cHaRaCtEr WiTh “RoGuE” iN tHeIr NaMe Is A RoGuE?!?! Blatantly obvious information aside Rogues get proficiency in four different skills! Take proficiency in Acrobatics for ninja stuff, Perception for warding, Intimidation to scare little Noxian kids (hey ninjas are scary!), and Performance for Korean raps.

You also get Expertise in two of those skills: naturally you need Stealth to be a ninja and Performance to be K-Pop artist, so take expertise in both of those. You also know the secret code language of Thieves’ Cant, which only other ninjas (or just regular old Rogues) know.

But of course you can’t be a ninja without knowing how to Sneak Attack. If you attack an enemy that’s distracted by an ally or have advantage to hit a weak point, you do an extra d6 of damage. Don’t worry: your assassination potential only gets better with time.

LEVEL 2 - ROGUE 2

Second level Rogues get Cunning Action for some ninja speed. You can now spend a Bonus Action to Dash, Disengage, or Hide.

LEVEL 3 - ROGUE 3

Yeah spoilers I guess Akali’s a Soulknife Rogue because she throws a shit load of knives. No she isn’t an assassin, despite the name of “Rogue Assassin.”

3rd level Rogues get to choose their Roguish Archetype and Akali is a Soulknife because it turns out psionics is the fastest way to get a shit load of throwing knives thanks to Psychic Blades. When you take the Attack action you can make a psychic knife in your hand that does a d6 of Psychic damage, and you can either use it to stab in melee range or throw it up to 60 feet.

If you attack with the blade you can make a smaller blade to attack with as a bonus action. The damage die of this bonus attack is 1d4 (instead of a d6) but other than that it pretty much works the same. The Psychic Blades vanish immediately after hitting or missing, and they leave no mark on their target, which is just a nice little bit of ninja flavor.

You also have innate Psionic Power which... takes a bit more to explain that “funny psychic throwing knife.” You have Psionic Energy die equal to twice your proficiency bonus, and you can use them on the following abilities:

Psi-Bolstered Knack lets you boost your skill checks with legally-not-Bardic Inspiration, as long as you’re proficient in the skill.

Psychic Whispers lets you coordinate in team chat and set up ganks.

I’m not going to go too deep into these abilities because they’re listed in the subclass and if you don’t know what the subclass does buy Tasha’s Cauldron of Everything and read it yourself. “See? Balance.” And speaking of balance your Sneak Attack damage now increases to 2d6!

LEVEL 4 - ROGUE 4

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4th level Rogues get an Ability Score Improvement but because it’s the 4th level in a Rogue build we’ll instead be taking the Mobile feat. Along with a 10 foot increase to your movement speed you can also cross over difficult terrain (cough walls cough) without spending extra movement if you Dash. But most importantly if you attack an enemy in melee range you can run away from them without provoking an attack of opportunity, even if you miss!

Yup XP to Level 3′s meme explains it better than I can. Sneak attack and run away: keep to the shadows and never stand still.

(Artwork by Jennifer Wuestling. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 5 - WARLOCK 1

What? Did you think that we’d be going for pure Rogue levels? Ha ha Warlock levels go brrrrr. Regardless a connection to the Spirit Realm manifests as powers of the Archfey, such as Fey Presence to Charm or Frighten anyone within a 10 foot cube with an epic rap battle.

And you also get Pact Magic, which comes back on a Short Rest! You get two cantrips at first level: For a Shuriken that inflicts Deep Wounds on those who idolize Eldritch Blast take Chill Touch, because a ninja should always have the right tool for the job. For some ninja trickery grab Minor Illusion to manipulate the shadows to your whim.

For your leveled spells Hex will cripple your foes to make it harder for them to run while also making your strikes deadlier, and uhhh... that’s about it, really? I mean, Sleep from the Archfey list is pretty nice for a sleep bomb but you really don’t need it. We’ll be holding off on leveled spells for a bit.

LEVEL 6 - WARLOCK 2

Second level Warlocks get Eldritch Invocations... hey wouldn’t it be funny if we just didn’t take invocations? I mean, feel free to grab some basic stuff like Armor of Shadows or Devil’s Sight for a time, but again we’re going to want to wait for...

LEVEL 7 - WARLOCK 3

Third level Warlocks get their Pact Boon and while you may never have gone to an official school you were sure to keep all the teachings of Master Shen in a tome. A Book of Shadows from the Pact of the Tome to be precise!

While Pact of the Blade would probably make more sense I’m pretty sure you can’t make your Psychic Blades into Pact weapons. That, and we need a multitude of features from Pact of the Tome more.

Picking up the Pact of the Tome will let you learn 3 cantrips from any class’ spell list. For a quality assurance guarantee on your skill checks take Guidance for that extra boost you need. For some natural Ionian magic Druidcraft will let you feel the spirit in the earth and the trees. And I know there are some spells I seem to stick into every build but yeah: Message is still good even if you have telepathy, for some silent resourceless communication between allies.

Oh and remember how we took no invocations last level? That’s because we’re going to be grabbing both Aspect of the Moon to confuse Diana mains as well as remain alert through the night without needing to sleep, and Book of Ancient Secrets to have some ninja tricks you can prepare over 10 minutes by Ritual Casting. I’d suggest Alarm and Comprehend Languages as the most in-character options but you can get more ritual spells by picking them up and inscribing them into your book (with some really damn expensive ink.)

You can also finally go and pick up those spells that I’ve been ignoring! Darkness is good for a magic smoke bomb (as long as you’re okay with blinding yourself and your allies too) and while perhaps not the most in-character Mirror Image is a damn good spell to up your survivability. And while we may already have Flash once per long rest I won’t ever complain about more Misty Step.

LEVEL 8 - WARLOCK 4

4th level Warlocks get an Ability Score Improvement: time for hee-hoo Athlete Feat that I take whenever I want a +1 in DEX but don’t know what to do. But believe it or not there’s actually a reason for it this time: Akali is an athlete, and you need to be able to perform feats of acrobatics like a ninja. Because again: you are a ninja.

You also get another spell along with another cantrip: for your cantrip Mage Hand will let you do a little bit of spirit-jitsu to reach the kimchi on the top shelf. As for your spell Pass without Trace was added in the Tasha’s extended spell list but you don’t really need it. Your friends might but for the most part I’d again suggest waiting for next level.

(Artwork by Zeen Chin. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 9 - WARLOCK 5

5th level Warlocks get another Eldritch Invocation and to be sneaky like a ninja One With Shadows will let you turn invisible if you stand still in the dark. Alternatively (if you think Stealth Expertise will carry you) you can take Far Scribe for some more secret shadow messages.

You can also learn third level spells like Blink for a slightly unreliable Smoke Cloud that’ll shroud you randomly, or Fear because ninjas are scary.

LEVEL 10 - WARLOCK 6

6th level Fey Warlocks get Misty Escape. As a reaction when you’re hit you can drop a smoke bomb to turn invisible and then teleport up to 60 feet. You remain invisible until the start of your next turn unless you attack or cast a spell, and can use this feature once per short or long rest.

You can also prepare another spell and for a ninja flashbang grab Hypnotic Pattern to daze everyone in a 30 foot cube. What? Ninjas can use flashbangs.

LEVEL 11 - WARLOCK 7

7th level Warlocks get another Eldritch Invocation and we can finally run across the universe to whoever we marked with our shuriken. Or at least 30 feet closer. Relentless Hex lets you teleport up to 30 feet and arrive within 5 feet of an enemy you have Hexed, as long as you can see them. While you can dash for this distance or Flash (Misty Step) this will let you get past any difficult terrain or obstacles with ease.

We can also finally get what we came for: a smoke cloud we can attack from while still being invisible. Take Greater Invisibility for invisibility that remains even after you attack. Yes this does mean as a Rogue you’ll have Advantage on all your attacks (to Sneak Attack), and yes the aesthetic of stabbing people with psychic knives that leave no mark while you yourself are invisible is freaking nuts. There are other 4th level spells you can take (Dimension Door and Shadow of Moil being two worth mention) but your other spells are still good. It’s up to you what you do as again I only own the build, not your character.

(Artwork by Alvin Lee. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 12 - ROGUE 5

At long last we’re going back to Rogue! 5th level Rogues can use their reaction for an Uncanny Dodge to take half damage from an attack. Remember that you only have one reaction per round, and this is the same reaction that you need to use for Misty Escape. So decide if disappearing but taking full damage is more valuable than taking half damage.

Your Sneak Attack also increases to 3d6, and you know those Psionic Energy die of yours? Well they’re now d8s! Finally!

LEVEL 13 - ROGUE 6

6th level Rogues get Expertise in two more skills. Acrobatics is an obvious must but I’ll leave the other skill up to you! Make your own build, even if it’ll probably include Riftmaker. (But when in doubt I opted for Perception personally.)

LEVEL 14 - ROGUE 7

7th level Rogues become masters of dodging skill shots thank to Evasion. If you make a Dexterity save and succeed, you take no damage. If you fail the save, you only take half damage! Additionally your Sneak Attack is now 4d6.

(Artwork by Pyeongjun Park. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 15 - ROGUE 8

8th level Rogues get another Ability Score Improvement. Hey about we cap that Dexterity score which has been sitting at an 18 for the past 6 levels? Deadliest knives, most agile of dodges, and BADDEST of dance moves. (Wait no that’s Charisma.)

LEVEL 16 - ROGUE 9

9th level Soul Knife Rogues can improve their weapons to Soul Blades, giving a few new uses to your Psionic Talent die. Homing Strikes will let you add your talent die to a missed attack, potentially allowing you to hit. If the talent die causes your attack to hit, you spend it.

Psychic Teleportation on the other hand will let you roll a Psionic Talent die as a bonus action to teleport an unoccupied space you can see, up to a number of feet away equal to 10 times the number rolled. This feature spends the die no matter how far you teleport. And finally your Sneak Attack increase to 5d6.

LEVEL 17 - ROGUE 10

The nice thing about Rogues is that they get more Ability Score Improvements. For MORE dancing increase your Charisma to show them what you’re made of. I’ll keep making jokes about K/DA don’t worry.

(Artwork by Atey Ghailan. Made for Riot Games.)

LEVEL 18 - ROGUE 11

11th level Rogues get Reliable Talent to turn any roll of 9 or lower on a skill check you’re proficient in to a 10. As per standard whenever I hit 11 in a Rogue build I like to make a list of your lowest possible roll so...

27 on Stealth or Acrobatics

25 on Performance

19 on Intimidation

17 on Perception

15 on Arcana

With results varying based on your choice of Expertise, of course. And if somehow that isn’t enough to make a skill check, your Psionic Talent die increases to a d10 along with your 6d6 Sneak Attack!

LEVEL 19 - ROGUE 12

Hey more Ability Score Improvements! That means you can nearly max out your Charisma just before level 20!

LEVEL 20 - ROGUE 13

13th level Soul Knife Rogues get the ultimate stealth tool: the Psychic Veil. As an action you become invisible for 1 hour unless you dismiss this effect (no action required). You remain invisible unless you deal damage to a creature or you force a creature to make a saving throw. You can use this feature once for free per Long Rest, and have to spend a Psionic Energy die to use it again.

Now some might say this is a weak ability since you have Greater Invisibility, but that spell only lasts a minute. This ability is far more useful for infiltration and out-of-combat uses, as with a full hour of being unseen you should be able to get into most places that you shouldn’t be. But if you think “a second level spell extended to 1 hour” isn’t a good capstone just remember that your Sneak Attack does increase to 7d6. And that... you know... You could just go Rogue 12 / Warlock 8 if you don’t like the level 13 ability.

FINAL BUILD

PROS

They can't stop me. I mean, they can try - 45 feet of movement with the ability to dash and teleport, with Athlete helping you scale up walls and Mobile making difficult terrain a non-issue. And yeah the Mobile feat in general makes you incredibly slippery.

I make problems... disappear - Who could’ve guessed that a permanently invisible Rogue would be dangerous? With a dozen tools to play keep-away you can easily be in multiple places at once and make your enemies unable to know where to strike.

I'll make this look like magic - You’ve got a nice bit of utility too with some great skill checks (boosted by your Psionic talent!) along with a ton of cantrips and the ability to learn any ritual spell you may find.

CONS

There are over 300 pressure points on the human body - You have a lot of features that are more for flavor than actual practicality, notably Relentless Hex which uhhhh... just Dash? You also have abilities which aren’t that strong, like weak Warlock spells we didn’t swap out (feel free to do that yourself) and Psychic Veil generally being a mediocre ability. (Nothing you can do to fix that.)

I was just warming up - Your stats aren’t awful but also aren’t fantastic... well except for your Intelligence: that’s pretty bad. And without any saving throw proficiency and a surprisingly limited amount of skills for a Rogue you really won’t be helpful outside of your area of expertise.

You don't get back what I take - Almost all your class features run on limited resources. Most of your Rogue abilities rely on your Psionic Talent die, and while you may have a lot you can only get one per Short Rest. Similarly you only have two Warlock slots, which even if they come back at the end of a Short Rest it leaves a lot to be desired. Frequent tea breaks are nice and all but you can quickly exhaust yourself without breaks.

But you are quick, silent, and deadly. All the skills of a ninja in one package. Dive in, make a clean cut, and get out before they know what hit ‘em. Akali’s that girl. 'Kali go grr. 'Kali don't stop. 'Kali don't skrrt. True Damage we do it, and maybe if you perform well enough you can get into Pentakill too. Look I’m not saying I want Akali to be in every band that Riot makes, but Pentakill Akali would be equally cool and hilarious.

(Artist unknown. Made for Riot Games.)

#dnd #dnd build #dnd guide #League of Legends #League of Legends Akali #dnd rogue #K/DA #k/da akali #kali go brrr #ninja #psychic ninja

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santalsaburablog · 3 years

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Adventures of Santal. Chapter 9: Landa's Secret

Revealing the secret builds trust.

Quarrel! After meeting near the Jedi Temple, Santal and her aunt's paths diverge in opposite directions. In an attempt to resolve the conflict, the girl manages to help the oncoming woman Rana Martez, and then return to continue her studies at the Jedi Temple. The story continues.

Over the past week since that day, Santal got to know all the members of the clan better. Dasha, as an inborn empath, was able to feel emotions from childhood, at least basic ones. Nick is cheerful, constantly smiling and can amuse those who are sad. Grace loves to laugh. Landa is strict, obedient and obedient to her elders. Just like me, Santal thought.

Almost nothing can be said about the rest, because I rarely had contact. From conversations it became clear that many really do not remember practically anything. Because of this, the girl even felt sorry for her peers. Because they weren't as lucky as she was. She knows a lot about her parents now. Exactly! She can look for information about them in the library, or, as she managed to christen her, "The Main Branch of Paradise." Of course, she had many favorite places in the Temple, but the library is definitely in the first place.

Santal studied the schedule thoroughly. I also asked the curator about the youngling's life. Some facts she already knew, and some frightened.

So, Santal already knew that the morning began with a study of the Force, then the children went to classrooms for a lesson in politics, as well as the history of many worlds and cultures. After lunch, the clans began physical education, acquiring the necessary skills and reflexes. In addition to theory, the Younglings had to find time for five daily meditations. Each clan began their training with the study of the Jedi Code and three important disciplines: Strength, Knowledge, and Self-Control. It was these foundations that became the foundation for further development. In addition to the required course materials, each youngling received a copy of The Jedi Path: A Manual for Students of the Force. Students had to know the layout of the Temple by heart, as well as the names and history of the Jedi who had memorials in the Temple, so as not to forget their history and become better acquainted with the traditions and philosophy of the Order.

The children studied and practiced together, which made them very close and learned to trust. Younglings often helped each other and followed an example from a comrade. While comprehending the Force and its capabilities, they simultaneously learned self-control, which was an important step on the path to mastery. Before starting to comprehend the art of lightsaber fencing, children had to prove themselves in other areas, otherwise they will not progress in the possession of weapons. In the third discipline (self-control), younglings were taught for the first time more sophisticated meditation techniques that helped keep their minds under control during battle. After mastering the six levels of lightsaber combat, they were challenged. Refusal was not accepted. If the child did not pass the tests, then he could repeat them. Youngling was either making progress or abandoning the path of the Jedi.

The tests were scheduled when the younglings were undergoing initial training at the academy. They consisted of three main tests: demonstration of knowledge of the Code, meditation, mastery of the lightsaber, and control of the Force. All junior Jedi were required to pass the exam, but not all passed the test. If in the future the younglings were not taken as Padawans, then the Council assigned the child to one of the Service Corps, where he would perform the tasks of the Order, which did not require skills in using a lightsaber and the Force. There was a third option for the Younglings, which the High Council deemed unsuitable for the Jedi path. Such children could leave the Order and use their skills to find a good place in the galaxy.

The last girl, to put it mildly, scared. And it gave rise to many questions and thoughts. What if it doesn't work? No, though. There is an answer to this question. But it doesn't make it any easier. It turns out that if Santal fails, then Corpus or a return to her aunt is waiting for her. Neither the first nor the second perspective seduced her. The girl more or less imagined her fate in case of returning to Ryloth. But my aunt wanted to be away from her. Or maybe she was joking? Or maybe not? If not, what should she do? Become like the Evil Hat? Could she do that? Santal did not know the answer to the question, because she considered what he was doing, impossible for her, beyond understanding. Santal just didn't understand how one could be so cruel. And if you imagine that she was expelled from the Order, would she be able to find him? Ask to take to yourself? Make friends? Although the girl did not understand the meaning of the word "friendship" well. But maybe he will teach her something. Although no, I have already taught.

Then a strange thought occurred to the girl. And if this uncle is an inanimate creature? A droid who pulled on someone else's skin so as not to frighten others? Maybe. So Santal decided to find this blue. Anyway. Either for training or revenge. All the same, there is nowhere else to go.

Стоит отметить, что, despite good relations with the Younglings, Santal did not become very close to anyone. She politely communicated with everyone, if someone asked for help, tried to help, and the classmates themselves helped her out more than once and invited her to play. But Santal kept the other children at a distance. Adults, strangers, were still afraid like the plague. But with the Jedi it was just the opposite. Santal was always looking for the company of her elders and enjoyed communicating with them. So she once met the Twi'lek Jedi Anun Bondara. In principle, Santal liked to communicate more with Twi'leks, even more than with people. Because when she spoke to them, she felt at home.

Bondara was also happy and at the same time surprised to meet a human girl who was raised by representatives of his race. You don't see that every day. Therefore, two Jedi from the same home planet quickly found common topics of conversation. Santal talked about her past and learned a lot about a stranger. Her new acquaintance was born into the Dara clan, was admitted to the Order at a young age, and eventually attained the rank of Master, following the path of a Jedi Guardian. Most importantly, Santal was amazed when she learned that he was a sentinel in the Ryloth system! It turns out that he could find her! Wow!

- I really want to travel the world. I have already visited some of the planets, namely Tatooine, Corellia, Devarone, Naboo, ”Santal admitted with childish ease. And casually added: - Although my aunt told me: "Do not go to Tatooine, or the giant slugs will eat you."

The elder Jedi's face turned sad.

- Did I say something wrong? - Santal was frightened.

Twi'lek hurried to smile and answered:

- No, baby, it's okay. You just know, I also like to travel the Galaxy, I visit Hutt space with a feeling of awkwardness, seeing how many Twi'leks were slaves or servants of the Hutts. It upsets me that my clan members have become either poor or criminals, but as a Jedi, I must remain cool and impartial, even when negotiating with the Hutts.

- It turns out that we need to talk politely with everyone, even with those who we don't like and who don't like us?

- Yes. Unfortunately, yes, - answered Bondara honestly and directly.

- I understand you perfectly. My aunt was once a Hutt thing. She would have been her to this day if one Jedi had not saved her. Maybe I'll save someone. The man nodded approvingly. And then Santal plucked up courage and voiced her concerns:

- We will soon begin to master the sword. I'm afraid I can't do it. I heard that it is difficult. I will be among the laggards, and then they will expel me or ...

Bondara made a gesture so familiar to the girl, meaning that he would not tolerate such thoughts.

- But the majority, on the contrary, are looking forward to such a moment. They can wave their arms, imagining themselves to be great warriors. And I think we need to let the Force guide the sword, throw away all possible fears about the outcome of the fight. Get rid of your thoughts. Don't expect victory. Don't expect defeat. Don't expect anything. The lightsaber is not meant to defeat enemies or rivals. We must use it to destroy our own greed, anger and stupidity. The one who created the lightsaber and walks with it through life must live in such a way that he himself can be a weapon against everything that is directed against peace and justice. And most importantly, be honest in your feelings, this is the surest road to knowing yourself and the Force.

These words gave Santal a tiny bit of hope.

As the days passed, training became more difficult. Santal was in trouble. The first is acrobatics. The girl was afraid to perform various techniques. Everything seemed to her that she would fall or be crippled. Somersaults were especially difficult. More precisely, they were not given at all.

Second, the senior Jedi sounded the alarm because a month had passed since enrollment in the Order, and Santal had still not become close to anyone. Yoda even approached her and talked about this topic. Santal answered the truth. That she communicates normally with everyone, but does not feel the need for friendship. Then the master replied that if she did not try to open up, then she would never have friends.

Other children also tried to make friends with the girl, talked to her and invited her to play even more often than before.

- Well, how can you sit and read all the time? - Max was sincerely surprised, unlike Landa, who treated this daily routine with much more approval.

Although it was not true. Santal not only sat, but also walked wherever possible. I studied the new house, where everything is. She enjoyed the conversation, but she was in no hurry to sign up as friends. She considered her fellow clansmen to be exceptionally good friends with whom she could communicate. And friends, real friends in the full sense of the word, she simply did not need. She was used to being alone, she was so comfortable. When you sit alone, you don't have to give in to anyone, everything is only according to your own rules. Or you sit in the library, not bothering anyone. Nobody distracts. No, Santal loved to help, but sometimes she just needed to be alone and reflect. Think. And she began to think almost every second after the story with her uncle.

And then, after some time, unexpectedly for everyone, including herself, Santal found herself a friend, more precisely, a girlfriend. She was a girl only a year older than her and the Mrialan race. Her name was Barriss.

They met in the library. Then Santal wanted to know more about her parents and went there. At this time, Barriss was sitting at a long table and reading something. It was she who became interested in Santal, drawing attention to a girl with olive skin, black hair, very beautiful blue eyes (Santal admired, she could not even take her eyes off) and with a strange pattern on her face, like freckles.

First Santal sat on the opposite corner of the table, then a little closer. And then she took courage and sat down very close. Left.

“Hi,” the reader replied quietly. Santal was surprised, she thought she would have to take the first step. Well, okay. So even better.

- Hi.

- What is your name?

- I am Youngling Santal Sabura. And you?

- Barriss Offee. Also youngling. Mirialanka.

- Nice to meet you. Santal paused and added, “You don’t… don’t… mind if I sit with you?” Do you read?

- Yes. One text.

- So you like to read? So do I.

- Yeah. Barriss answered calmly, monotonously and reluctantly, as if the lesson was answering. Only at the last word she smiled.

- I'm also looking for information. About two Jedi.

Then Santal went to Jocasta, who had become her favorite librarian, and asked for a CD with information about Bastian and Adir Shan. And she provided what was needed without question. The girl returned to her seat, feeling her bursting with curiosity. Finally, she will make her dream come true. She finally finds out what her mother and father looked like. Suddenly she wanted to question Barriss.

“Barriss, were you, like everyone, found and taken to the Temple?

- Yes.

- And you don’t remember your parents either?”

- No. The girl shook her head. - I was born on board an unknown passenger liner and never knew my parents. However, my connection to the Force was quickly discovered and I was taken away.

Santal's pupils were dilated.

- Wow! - she exclaimed. - I was also born on a ship. - And mentally added: “But, unlike the others, I was lucky. I know who my parents are. And I can look at them right now. "

And now the long-awaited moment has come. Santal looked at the photo, and warmth spread throughout her body. As if wrapped in a soft blanket. How she looks like them! For everyone. Dad got the eyes. From mom - hair.

So the girl sat there, unable to tear herself away from the faces of her parents.

“What eyes they have! There is so much power in them! And smiles! Probably, when they were taking pictures, none of them suspected that they would have a girl, and something would happen to them. Well, I don't believe such talented Jedi would die. Surely they just got lost. Either they went on an expedition, wishing to discover or have already discovered many new plants, or animals, or even a new planet, system. Galaxy! But something went wrong and they got stuck. Or maybe this is what happened: my parents crashed on an unknown planet, saved its inhabitants, and they made them their rulers. King and queen Or the chancellor and the chancellor's wife. "

Dreaming, the girl did not notice how an hour had passed, although it seemed to her that it was less. And from the next day they began to take acrobatics. This is where the problems began. Santal was scared. Because in the classroom they had to do somersaults, jump, get up in different poses. The algorithm most often was this: you jump and move your arms and legs in the air. Left, right or something else. There was also such an exercise: you need to run up to the wall, push off from it with your feet and roll back, landing on your feet. This exercise in the Temple was considered one of the easiest. But Santal was afraid to do it. What if she falls, breaks her leg and ends up in the infirmary? No, she had a good relationship with Vokara, she just didn't like being sick.

For many of the clan members, most of the exercises worked. Yes, and the daughter of the Jedi herself, in principle, tried, it just did not work out most often because of fear. But in other subjects, things were much better. Just fine. On history, politics, she regularly crammed the material and answered questions more than once during the lesson. So her teachers were praised and considered the best in the clan in this matter.

Barriss and Santal became inseparable. Often they could be seen in the library communicating with each other, studying texts, discussing material. One explains one, and vice versa. Soul mates found each other.

And so a month passed. And soon Santal and her clan prepared a surprise. On that day, instead of the usual classes, they were expected to show Yoda's training duel with one of the masters. Of course, everyone was waiting for her with eagerly. Especially Max. Three days before the upcoming event, he was worn during the break. It will jump to the left to Adrian, then to the right to Dasha. When he jumped up to Landa, she scolded him:

- Behave yourself! A future Jedi after all! I hope you will sit still during the duel.

- Do not swear, teacher, - as always the boy answered with a joke. - But the rest, at least someone, tell me, are you burning with impatience? Adrian? Nick? Santal?

“A little, yes,” Santal replied, hoping that he would calm down a little.

Her words had little effect. At least he stopped jumping. But Landa did not surprise her at all. Santal was also not happy with Max's behavior, but, unlike the twilight, she was calmer about it. And if such active and sociable children as Grace or Max said that she and Landa studied longer together, but still did not understand what was wrong with her (she was like that almost from the first day), then Santal was not at all worried , because she herself is the same. But there was a difference. Sabura was never hard on others. And Landa sometimes loved to educate. Of course, Santal understood that this was not just that, but others from the beginning of their acquaintance almost immediately gave up. That's why they joked at times.

And Santal suddenly remembered that when Dasha began to talk about the twilight, she abruptly stopped the attempt. And the girl might just have forgotten about it, but it didn't work. Curiosity burned like acid. And for obvious reasons, Santal did not dare to ask, and she considered it tactless to climb into someone else's soul without asking. When Landa herself wants to share with someone, then she will find out. And if he doesn't want with anyone, nothing. Santal will not be offended. She herself has secrets. One is scarier than the other. Here's another reason not to intrude. You yourself will ask a secret, you will have to tell yours. And Santal with anyone, even peers, was afraid to share secrets. You never know what. Enough time passed, and I was still afraid of strangers like fire, only less. I was not afraid of children at all, but all the same. Suddenly they are someone's spies, sent by adults to find out more about her than she said. Oh Sila, she seems to have begun to understand that uncle. Maybe that's why he didn't believe? Thought Santal was a secret agent sent to spy on him or even kill him. Although ... it cannot, and it is so! He said something like that. Maybe he has secrets himself. And he was afraid that she would find out? But Strength, she's honest. And besides, a Jedi. And the Jedi try to keep their word.

The girl learned an important lesson. When speaking, try to understand what the other person is thinking. You should not easily trust those whom you see for the first time or whom you know little. When you meet someone, you have no idea if this is your future enemy or your friend. Anything can be. Therefore, you need to be on your guard.

But, despite this, Santal remained unconvinced. No, she was beginning to understand her uncle's fears, to guess what he was thinking. But his guilt in her eyes did not diminish. She's just a girl! Doesn't she deserve mercy? Why is it obligatory to take it somewhere? Or maybe he guessed she was Force sensitive? But this is not an argument. Is it her fault that she was born this way? And he could check that she was really a child? In a word, the uncle is inadequate. From whatever angle you look.

- Santal. - The voice pulled the girl out of prostration.

Santal stopped looking at the floor and raised her head. Landa was standing near the wall.

- Hi. Something happened?

- Nothing. I just want to talk, ”the twilight said mysteriously. “But not here. - Shall we go to me or to you?

- Let me think. Come on to me. It's somehow easier for me on my territory. Santal grew more and more terrifying with every word spoken. So what happened that Landa wants to talk in private? And this word is "easier." It smacks of something serious. It is now clear that a serious conversation awaits her, and not some girlish gossip.

Entering the room, Landa sank onto the bed. Legs together, eyes on hands. Santal pricked up her ears, prepared to listen.

- Everything, I'm ready. Santal sat down beside her. Not too close, not too far.

At first Landa could not get herself together, she looked at her fingers, flexing them. At first, the daughter of the Jedi waited patiently, but when several minutes had passed, she braced herself and said:

- If you don't know where to start, start from afar.

Landa thought for two more minutes and began:

- You know, I thought for a long time whether to say or not. Initially, even before you came here, I generally planned to keep to myself. I think you can understand why.

- Well, I understand. Each of us has secrets ...

- Right. Landa smiled without showing her teeth. Santal also smiled with emotion. - It's good that you understand that. So I made the right choice.

- About what?

- About what I will tell later. What you just said is good. It's true. But, unfortunately, not all are like that. For example, Daria and Maxim. They, if you noticed, often annoy me. One of the reasons is they are not like that. They love to share everything. Therefore, when I first came to this clan, I was "attacked by them." In the sense that they started asking personal questions. Well, you understand. How did I get to the Temple, who brought it. And Max in general climbed into the jungle, - the clan member complained.

- Well, I haven't been "attacked". As far as I remember.

- This experience of communicating with me taught them something. Lucky you. But I do not. I still remember that Max pestered the most with questions. - It's curiosity. - Santal tried to stand in the place of the boy. Try to understand what he would say.

“You know, you can die of curiosity,” the twilight replied sharply and very seriously, her eyes flashing.

Santal froze immediately. Landa said to the point. How you guessed!

- Hey, what are you? Santal, Santal, where are you? Did I say something wrong?

- Well no. Your last phrase ... right to the point. Should I not know about this.

- Come on! - Landa was shocked. From the next grimace, it became clear that she also wanted to know what had happened, but almost immediately faded away. - Although it’s me ... If you don’t want to talk, don’t. I understand perfectly well, I myself have never told anyone anything.

- So we are here only for this? - Santal was surprised.

- Yes. What? You thought ...

- No no no. I didn't think about anything. It's just that when you started, I thought there was some terrible secret awaiting me. But I also liked this frank conversation. That you generally agreed to this. You know me worse than the rest. And I understand you. I myself do not like those who cannot, without a large circle of friends, not share information, who constantly ask questions such as “what happened?”, “Please, can I help?”, And just harassment. For example, "where are you going?" Why do some people get involved in their own business? You know, before the Order, I enjoyed being alone. Fair. Communicated only with my uncle and aunt. Played most often in the backyard. That's why I want to spend time alone. True, a friend appeared recently. And that's enough for me. Everyone was perplexed that I often sit alone. And I'm so comfortable. Peers are not needed. Only if there are a lot of them. I don't know how else to explain.

- In my opinion, you explained clearly enough.

- OK, bye.

Santal turned around and was about to leave when she heard a soft whisper:

- I don't remember my parents at all. More precisely, I would like to forget them. If they loved me, they wouldn't sell me to some syndicate. Not rations, if you've thought about them. They made me serve. At first glance, nothing complicated. Bring trays of food and drinks. But in reality, everything is much worse. When you are pulled, pushed, kicked, spanked a hundred times a day. I could not stand it and wanted to run away. But it's hard to escape when a chip is put in you that explodes when you try to leave the territory. But I tried. At first I wore a collar with an electric leash. Hardly found a way to turn it off. But I was caught and this chip was planted. Then I was resold. I ran away on the way, transferring to another ship. But he was captured by pirates. So I changed five masters, until a Jedi accidentally found me and brought me here. - Landa spoke with difficulty. And it was clear from the intonation that the story was not complete. But even without that, it was terrifying.

Santal was shocked. For a short time I stopped hearing altogether. A veil covered his eyes. This is what she did not expect to hear. No, she had thoughts that there was something unpleasant in Selmura's life. But she didn't even think about it.

“Now it's clear why you ... I wouldn't tell anyone either. And yet you shared with me. It is with me. Why? The girl asked just as quietly.

- It is not that simple. See, you told me to start from afar. I started. Through the conversation, I realized that you and I are kindred spirits. This is how I learned that you can be trusted. And I entrusted you with the main terrible secret, without fear of what you will reveal. I know. No offense.

And Santal was not at all offended. Moreover, she was going to take this technique into service in the future. Thank you, Landa. What a fine fellow she is! Despite everything, she continued to live on! Probably Santal could not do that. Previously, she considered herself a sufferer, but now she learned that, it turns out, there are people who are unhappy than she.

- You know, I also want to tell the main terrible secret.

Santal told how she got to the Temple. About everything. To which Landa replied:

- Oh, you're still lucky. In general, I noticed long ago that you are very lucky. Was born in a shirt. And you know what else?

- What?

“I also chose you because you are from Ryloth.

- Yes. And there is. I was raised by Twi'leks. It's strange that I understand why I have no processes. I know that I am human. But I consider myself a semi-tweelek. It is clear why.

For the first time in the evening, and for the entire acquaintance, Landa laughed. But this laugh was light, quick, but memorable.

- And I still wondered why you try to hold on representatives of my race, not my own. I noticed that you feel more confident with twi'leks. Not every day you come across such a phenomenon.

- Yes, that is right. Probably. Okay, if you don't mind, I'll go now. If we've discussed everything.

- Of course. I don't hold you anymore. Until.

- Until.

Reaching her room, Santal fell on the bed, digesting the whole evening, after which she felt different. New. As if she was older. She had never before had such a serious conversation. Santal also felt that she was close to another girl. And it's great! Brought together on similar secrets and problems. Indeed, soul mates. The girl sincerely believed that Landa would not tell anyone her secret. As well as today's conversation.

The world for Santal Sabura began to lose its pink color. And she will carry the secret of Landa to the grave!

#Cad Bane #cad bane x oc

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bluemoon-writer · 5 years

Text

Childhood Friends AU: Max and Markov (Marxkov)

Part 1- In which Max ‘makes’ a friend

(2.6k words)

Masterlist Here

A/N: I got a bit carried away while writing and this became less of a list of bubbly making headcanons and more of a tragic origin story, so it’s a little different from the Marikim headcanons, so let me know what you guys think.

------

-Max’s mother, Claudie, gets pregnant with him at age 18

-he was an accidental pregnancy

- his father, Adam Kante, had just enlisted in the French Armed Forces and his mother was just starting university

-it wasn’t ideal circumstances, but his parents loved each other and didn’t want to give up

-So his dad proposed, and was stationed in Paris until Max was born

-unfortunately, then he was sent off to an overseas base

-Luckily, Claudie’s brother steps up to help out.

-Two years older than his sister, he was very different from her and her husband. While both of them were disciplined and fact oriented, he was more laid-back

-His dream was to be a stand-up comedian, and his stage name was Mark Oz

-He worked at night so he was able to watch Max during the day so Claudie could go to school

-With Adam away for so long, Mark became a father figure of sorts to Max

-They would spend most of the day together, and Mark realized early on that he had a child-genius on his hands

-So he bought extra learning material for Max

-He encouraged Max as much as could to peruse whatever academics interested

-Max was only 3 though, so nothing truly interested him more than Transformers

-Mark played the cartoon as background noise one day, and Max was instantly hooked

-He watched every episode

-For his birthday, he received only Transformers figurines

-when he started school he would draw new transformers in Art class

-For his 5th birthday, his mom bought him a robotics kit (a child-friendly robotics kit)

-and his Uncle bought him a coding Manuel

-Max found his new passion

-him and his uncle spent days building simple robots

-he was so fascinated by robots that he spent most of his free time learning more

-he dreamed about one day creating his own transformer

-and his Uncle helped him.

-He was never super academic but was still had the family brains.

-He full heartedly threw himself into Max’s passion

-inadvertedly, it helped his career. He created one of the most unique stand up comedy routines ever heard in Paris, those lucky enough to see it raved about it for years

-Mark Oz was finally hitting it big time, and he did not give a shit

-the only person he cared about making smile everyday was his nephew

-together, the two of them continued to hone Max’s robot building skills

-Mark bought a big black notebook and in it he wrote down every robot Max wanted to build

-max would dictate the details and Mark would write it, and then Max would attach a picture he drew of it

-despite being a child genius, he was still a child and had atrocious handwriting

-Slowly they were crossing robots off the list, starting with the most simple

-a basic walking robot

-eventually, and Mark didn’t know how long it would take, but they’d get to their last robot

-a fully functioning AI

-When Max turned seven he started taking advanced classes

-His mom had just finished her PhD, one of the youngest ever to complete the program, and was considering applying to become an astronaut

-Both Mark, Max, and her husband encouraged her to go for. Adam offered be discharged from the military to look after Max, but Mark insisted that he wouldn’t mind taking care of Max

-“Neither one of you should put your dream jobs on hold. I’ve been watching Max for seven years, I love the kid, and I’ll take care of him for the rest of my life if he still wants me around.”

-And Mark kept that promise

-Unfortunately, he kept it because his life was cut short.

-It was after a late show, the driver was intoxicated and didn’t see Mark crossing the street.

-Claudie withdrew from the astronaut program and took up a job as a train driver so she could be around for Max

-Adam returned from his deployment, but things just weren’t the same. He enlisted in a third campaign after a month

-Max was devasted. His uncle was the only one who understood him.

-He didn’t speak a word to anyone for a year.

-His mom is concerned, but therapists insist that Max just needs time

-Meanwhile, Max works his way through his robot list.

-His mom offers to help him, but he refuses.

-If he can’t build them with his uncle then he’ll build them alone

-a year later he’s halfway through the list

-His mom almost cries when he asks her to come see his robots

-He spends the entire day showing her the different ones and explaining what they do

-After that, their relationship improves greatly. Max talks a lot about everything he’s interested in

-Claudie is barely able to keep up

-She’s afraid that he might have an unhealthy attachment to his robots though, and is afraid of what will happen when he completes his list

-So she introduces him to a new hobby, video gaming

-Mark had tried to get Max into it a few times but Max was more interested in Robotics and programming at the time

-Now though, in memory of his uncle, he gives it a go

-and fucking loves it

-He and his mom spend the weekend playing old games that his uncle had

-He doesn’t give up on his robots though

-Two years later, he’s down to the very last robot on his list

-His father comes home that same week, his three year campaign ended

-Once Max started speaking again, his father would video call him. Max would show him his latest robot, and his father, who didn’t know a thing about robots, would ask him as many questions as he could come up with about it

-It was slightly awkward at first, seeing his dad in person, but soon it faded away

-Max still didn’t want help with his robots, but he was more than happy to play video games with his father

-his dad was skilled, particularly in fighting games, and Max almost never beat him

-at first

-his dad taught him a few tricks, and Max practiced and practiced until he could beat his dad

-Max was doing pretty good

-Still, though, he seemed to have an aura of sadness around him

-His dad asked him one day what games he liked to play with his friends

“I don’t have friends”

-It was the advanced classes. They were filled with older kids, and none of them wanted to befriend a 10 year-old

-His parents decided to pull him out at the end of the year.

-For college, he’d be going to a regular (though very good) school with kids his own age

-Francois Dupont had a great reputation, and offered him an academic scholarship

-His dad enlisted in another campaign

-Max was sad to see him leave, but was feeling happier than he had been in a while

-He continued to work on his last robot

-He turned 11 and started school at Francois Dupont

-He had no idea how to interact with kids his own age

-He was seated next to a hyperactive kid who introduced himself as Kim

-They were in the very front row and Kim joked that the teacher was already trying to keep an eye on them

-it wasn’t very funny, but Max almost fell over laughing

-“Wow, if you thought that was funny, just wait till you meet my friend Marinette!”

-“I’m sorry its just that…I would never disrupt class. Knowledge is the most valuable thing we can gain, and I intend to gain as much as I can.”

“I don’t know man, that sounds kind of like something a mad scientist would say.”

“well, I am trying to build the world’s first sentient AI in my mom’s basement.”

-Being at a regular school is a relief to Max

-The homework is extremely easy in comparison to what he’d been doing before, which gives him more time to work on his robot

-(bare with me through this next part guys, I do not know anything about science, mechanics, or engineering so this will probably be a heaping load of bullshit)

-the biggest difficulty in the creation of this robot was not creating an AI, many people have done that before, but rather figuring out how to allow it to feel without programming emotions into it

-Max had been doing a lot of research on Markov chains lately

-He believed that being able to code the ability to predict events would lead to a breakthrough on how to code the comprehension of emotions

-but the Markov process and chains were extremely complicated

-but, Max was out of ideas

-so he spent weeks reading about all the research and experiments. He read about modern day applications of it, analyzed the codes he could get his hands on

-and then he made his own.

-He didn’t need his AI to study systems, but rather humans

-ideally, if he did his code right, the AI would scan the web for all examples of human behavior to catalog and process it. Hopefully, then it would gain the ability to comprehend human emotion

-Max figured he would know if it worked if it was able to predict how people would react to different things being said to them

-sure enough, he was right…in a way

-Max didn’t think he’d be able to achieve true sentience like what the transformers had

-He was trying to give his AI the ability to understand emotions, not the ability to feel

-and yet, somehow, from the first day the robot was online, he seemed to have emotions

-it confounded Max

-He spent all of winter break talking to the robot

-trying to determine if it really felt

-He started just by talking to it

-it had access to all the knowledge on the internet, yet it seemed to have trouble grasping many theories about philosophy and morals

-Max accidentally stayed up the entire night discussing moral relativism with it

-He counted it’s ability to ask questions and hold a conversation in it’s favor

-however, that’s what Max was aiming for in the first place, and it didn’t convince him it had feelings

-he had to admit though, he truly hoped it did as he was quickly considering the robot as his first true friend

-in the weeks they spent talking Max told the robot his life’s story

-and the robot replied with genuine sympathy

-Max connected with it in a way that he’d only connected with one other person before

-he showed it a video of his uncle’s stand up routine

-when the robot started laughing Max was blown away

-not by the laugh, but by it’s reaction to it

“Oh no! Max, I am afraid I had a malfunction! Do you think it is possible for auditory signals to transmit a virus?”

“What? No, that’s laughter. It’s natural, especially when you’re listening to someone as funny as my uncle.”

“Yes, the brother of your mother. You mentioned he had a career as a comedian, and a quick scan of the web shows that he was quite successful.”

“Yeah, he was.”

“You sound sad. Were you close?”

(it’s only because it’s a robot and has advanced hearing sensors that it’s able to hear Max’s “Yes”)

-Max really hopes the robot truly is sentient

-What finally convinced him is when he heard it cry

-He’d left it in the basement to get eat dinner, promising to be back in half an hour

-but got drawn in to a round of video games with his mother

-sure enough, a few hours past before Max remembered he left the robot in the basement

-he shrugged it off as an accident until he got to the basement door and heard quiet sobs

-when he went down the stairs it was the robot crying

-when Max came into hearing range, the sounds stopped

“Max! You’re back! I thought you had abandoned me!”

-it didn’t seem possible, but Max could hear the happiness in the robot’s voice

-in that moment, Max made a decision

-“How do you feel about the name Markov?”

“Like the chains?”

“Yes, but Markov also sounds like…Mark Oz.”

“…I would be honored to be named after someone who was so important to you.”

-Max introduces Markov to his mom

-She’s literally at a loss for words

-like, she knew Max was a genius, but this was something on a whole other level

-She’s incredibly proud though

-and wants to tell everyone about it

-But Max stops her

-Markov isn’t just a robot, he’s a sentient being, and more importantly, he’s his friend

-if people learned about him, they would want to take him apart to figure out how he works

-Max doesn’t want that and neither does Markov

-So his mother keeps silent

-Plus there’s still more work to be done

-Markov might be built, but there’s still a lot that could be improved

-For starters, he’s huge

-Max built him out of three old computer monitors and can’t even lift him

-luckily, Max doesn’t have to do all the work himself

-Markov creates the blueprint for a smaller body

-they go from three monitors to two to two

-but it is slow going

-the first downsize took six months because Max didn’t want to risk accidentally destroying Markov

-he’s the happiest he’s been in a while

-but Markov thinks he could be even happier

-Max hasn’t been interacting with his classmates much

-he’s on good terms with them. No one trips him or throws things at the back of his head, and he talks to some of them every now and then

-his seatmate, Kim, asks him how he’s doing every morning

-Max doesn’t realize that he could be getting an even better experience out of school

-but Markov does, he’s analyzed enough books to know that it’s vital for a young child to have multiple human friends

-so he encourages Max to reach out

-Max is hesitant, but asks Kim if he wants to come over and play video games sometime

-Kim’s response is a resounding HELL YES

-(minus the swear word bc he’s like 11)

-Max is nervous as all hell, but the moment he has a game controller in his hands it goes away

-Kim is pretty tough competition, but Max still wins most of the time

-before they know it, it’s dark outside

-The next day when they need to partner up for an assignment, Kim asks Max if he wants to be partners

-Max smiles for a week straight

-With Markov’s encouragement, Max slowly befriends most of his classmates

-He’s particularly close with his seatmate Kim and a girl from Class A named Alix

-He also meets Kim’s friend Marinette, who’s in Class A with Alix

-and her friend Nino

-Still, Max considers Markov to be his best friend

-He sits in the basement with him everyday and tells him everything that happened that day

-Markov eagerly listens to all of it

-he wants more than anything to be able to go out and things for himself.

-but for now he’s stuck in the basement

-he’s sure that one day Max will make him small enough to transport

-for now, he’s happy to listen to his best friend’s stories

-----

Bonus:

------

A/N: I didn’t mean to make Max’s life so tragic, I swear.

If you want to be added to the childhood friends taglist or removed from it, please send me an ask or message me.

Taglist:

All Miraculous Ladybug fics:

@ravennightingaleandavatempus @crazylittlemunchkin

All Childhood AU fics:

@charlietheepic7 @krispydefendorpolice

#miraculous ladybug au #marxkov #miraculous ladybug #ml headcanon #mlb #max kante #markov

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kitchenremodelingatlanta41 · 4 years

Text

Determining a Kitchen Remodeling Budget

Kitchen remodeling atlanta

It is crucial to determine a financial budget for almost any do-it-yourself project, and kitchen remodeling is no exception.

A thing of caution: I spent many hours researching kitchen remodeling cost and budgeting online to gather data just for this article. I ran into a couple websites that gave size pricing for kitchen remodeling. Although I commiserate using attempt to find an easy method to discover remodeling pricing, this type of advice is just not operating out of reality. Remodeling jobs in general are really specific towards the conditions in the building and tastes from the homeowner that no square footage pricing will ever starting point. Also i bumped into many websites that didn't provide you with any real details about starting a budget but basically interpreted Hanley Wood's Remodeling Cost vs. Value report that is published each year. You happen to be much better off visiting the Cost vs. Value report web evaluating the results by yourself.

home remodeling marietta

Like whatever else on this planet a kitchen remodel is going to are more expensive than you thought it would and the sky is the limit on the it may cost depending on you. There are multiple factors which are into determining a remodeling budget.

There are many web sites you can check out assist you to begin a basic budget number to start with. My personal recommendation is Remodeling Magazine's Cost vs. Value Report which is released by region and major city every year. The truly nice point about this report is it offers a description in the "average" project to help you gauge if your kitchen remodel will almost certainly fall below or above the benchmark. Also i find their average pricing to be a definative reflection with the pricing for the company, so by recommending to clients before I even meet with them which they investigate this report these are prone to generate a realistic budget we can easily work within to provide them a fantastic kitchen.

Custom Hutch developed with Semi-Custom Cabinets

While Remodeling Magazine's report is extremely helpful, it is still an incredibly one size fits all approach to generating a budget. Read on if you would like try and hone your numbers somewhat.

Get out a pad and paper and take note of a number of notes about each factor as you go along through their list:

Factor 1 Home Value- Consider not only what you think your property is worth, but the price of similar homes in your town that already have updates. The best site to check house values is zillow.com, simply enter your address and you also receive an interactive map with house values as well as other information listed directly on the map. Pay attention to which homes are of similar size to yours, happen to be purchased lately, but have a higher value, then peek inside their windows to see just what the house appears to be. Ok, seriously, I was only kidding. If you don't know them perhaps it's time to meet the neighbors and request a fast tour.

Factor 2 Wow! - It has everything to apply your objectives and motivations. Jot down each motivational factor which can be important to you within a kitchen remodel. Below are a few possible examples: Kitchen is fallling. You want to cook and also the layout doesn't suit you. You love to entertain and wish to start the kitchen as being a place to gather. You'll need a kitchen that wows your guests. You are getting prepared to sell your home as well as the kitchen is often a sticking point with buyers... Now that you have your list, determine what motivations are most crucial and relist them in motivational order. Imagining your financial allowance from "the middle" be aware of which factors might slowly move the budget up or down...i.e. attempting to remodel to encourage a sale might slowly move the budget down, remodeling to wow guest might max it out...etc.

Factor 3 Did someone say AGA? - List any "must haves" for any kitchen remodel to get worthwhile to you. Possible examples: granite counters, hawaiian isle having an extra sink, an extra dishwasher, a commercial quality gas range, etc.

Factor 4 Longevity- Determine on the better of your ability just how long you plan on owning the property.

Factor 5 Size Matters- Evaluate which percentage of your house your house encompasses. A sampling of over 100 modern home floorplans of 1000 to 3000 square foot homes revealed the typical kitchen sq footage to be 7% of the home's sq footage. In case your kitchen is larger or small compared to this average you might need to decrease or increase your budget accordingly.

Factor 6 Layout- in the event you know already you will want the sink moved, hawaiian isle sink added, an inside wall moved plus an exterior door added, then you need to incorporate money in your budget well past that of a basic facelift would cost.

Tricky layout: the decorative column conceals a good wrapped drain pipe

Factor 7 Funding- Determine the most money you can manage to spend. Should you be financing your project you can calculate what a lender will probably lend you. Lenders are interested in a debt to income ratio(DTI) of.36 or fewer. Your DTI created by subtracting all your monthly debt obligations (bank card payments, automotive loans, mortgage, etc.) and dividing from your monthly income. To find out your maximum safe monthly debt multiply.36 times your monthly income. Now subtract your existing monthly debt from this number and you have a month-to-month budget maximum. Here is a connect to a calculator that will perform the math for you personally: mortgage calculator

Putting it All Together

The key to managing your finances are choosing the percentage of your home's value you should use being a budget guideline. While researching this article I came across recommendations to make use of percentages which range from 10% to 25% of home value. For the kitchen remodel of the substance that also includes new flooring, appliances, cabinets, sink/faucet, lighting and bringing electric approximately code I find anything below 15% becoming a very dubious number. Perhaps over a big house 10% will be a workable budget, but on a 200k house a 20k finances are marginal at the best for a complete kitchen remodel.

If resale value is vital to you it is shrewd to keept the expense of your house renovation project within 20% of the present valuation on your home. Staying in this particular range insures that almost all the new kitchen's charges are recouped in increased home value immediately, as well as the remaining cost needs to be recouped within Five years since your home appreciates.

Ok, let's run through an example. Bear in mind, there isn't any exact formula here. We're simply doing our best to become as informed as you possibly can making a good plan regarding how much to pay on the kitchen remodel.

For the example let's use the home. It's a 50's cape cod with a modest sq footage of 1500.

Factor 1 value: Zillow provides me with an estimated value of $167,500, however, I notice zillow hasn't yet updated and included the one family homes that had been recently integrated the area behind us with a starting tariff of $270k. Zillow also has our square footage listed for less than 1200. Looks like the previous owner did a bit remodeling without having a permit. I will base my budget on a expense of 180k which is analogous with houses locally which are exactly the same size.

Factor 2 Goals: My wife and I wish to entertain guests. To make a kitchen remodel worthwhile for us we should instead lose an indoor wall to open up inside the kitchen and dining nook to the family area. I'm going to add 1% to plan for this.

Factor 3 Most important items: Being a former chef two most important items personally certainly are a new oven plus a really nice propane range(no propane service here), preferably an industrial range modified for use at home (real commercial ranges don't have insulation round the oven, critical for home safety). I'll add another 1% to my budget to make certain there is enough money to obtain me my range and propane installation.

Factor 4 Longevity: We plan to live in our home at the least 4 years. Usually of thumb it requires Several years for the majority of remodeling to comprehend and recoup all of your money. Since we might be right here at least A few years I am not planning to penalize this, but as there is a pretty good possibility we'll move right around Several years That's not me going to increase it like I'd personally as we were staying for a long time.

Factor 5 Height and width of Kitchen: Our kitchen is all about 140SquareFeet(SF). That's over 9% in the SF of the home, 2% above average. Obviously this kitchen is going to require some additional material and cabinets. I am going to up the budget 1% with this, I hope it's enough.

Factor 6 Layout: We are going to change the layout of our kitchen pretty extensively. Supermarket use a cooktop peninsula. The stove will probably go on a differnet wall and also the dishwasher will turn to the peninsula, though we might ditch the peninsula, slowly move the fridge and add an island instead. The only thing that won't move will be the sink. I'll add another 1% to my budget, again hoping $1800 (1% individuals 180k value) is sufficient to cover the electrical and plumbing changes.

For my base I'll use 20%. Because i previously mentioned, there are gonna be people who will argue when camping with that, but going lower often doesn't provide you with workable budget numbers for full blown kitchen remodels. I'm adding 4% according to my factors in the above list. I adjusted my zillow.com estimated home value to 180k depending on the comparable sq footage and expense of other homes around me. Thus giving us a working budget of 24% x 180k= $43,200 While i compare this to the Cost Vs. Value report I see that in the centre Atlantic Region a significant Kitchen Renovation is $59, 098. It appears as though my budget may be bit low, especially ever since i really would like granite countertops along with the Cost Vs. Value specs require laminate tops. On the other hand my kitchen is substantially smaller compared to their 200SF benchmark, therefore i think I'll opt for my budget number to see what my contractor can do for me because budget.

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redandfranticfeelings · 5 years

Text

an autistic analysis, lyric by lyric, of ‘i love play rehearsal’

ive been hyperfixating over bmc for the last month and i keep thinking about how autistic the main characters are and christine is so very very very autistic coded to me. so i decided im just going to straight up deconstruct the lyrics of her signature song in the context of her being autistic (and also having adhd, but my experience is mostly in autism)

this is very very rambley and based more on personal experience than research, so i doubt itll be interesting to anybody but me, but i just want to talk about christine, the autistic queen

I love play rehearsal Because its the best! Because it is fun. I love play rehearsal and I get depressed as soon as its done.

it goes without saying that chrstine’s special interest is theater right? the way she treats it as the “highlight of [her] life” and then switches into this song after acting completely awkward and disinterested in jeremy outside of the context of him being engaged in her special interest.

But not depressed as in like kill yourself depressed No, im not into self-harm Dude, I swear, here check my arm!

overexplaining in a way that reads very much like speaking before she thinks, even though bringing up self harm in casual conversation with someone you barely talk to is not exactly proper etiquette. i think this is also an adhd trait? going faster than your own brain. that’s basically this whole song.

See, I just use the word to emphasise a point, Show the passion I have got I am passionate a lot. I have mad, gigantic feelings, Red and frantic feelings, About most everything Like gun control, like spring,

a lot of people assume autistic people are typically emotionless but it’s also very easy for us to get caught up in emotional issues especially when it comes to stuff we love, and it catches us off guard. christine being hyperempathetic is implied later in the show when she has that awful survivors’ guilt over making fun of rich and jake, and it also plays into her being so socially conscious as well.

Like if I’m living up to all I’m meant to be.

being an high school junior is really rough bc of all the decisions that have to be made regarding college and your future as an independent adult, and being autistic just makes it worse bc it can easily lead to burnout to deal with so much at once, if you even can comprehend these things much at all (i had no idea what to do, lol). i doubted my ability to grow up and succeed constantly because i had no idea who to talk to and what questions to ask and how to present myself. that’s something that a lot of people worry about, but having social delays makes it way more of a pressing issue than it is for neurotypicals, i feel.

I also have a touch of ADD. Where was I? Oh, right!

self explanatory and very canon. adhd and autism can be diagnosed simultaneously nowadays and the symptoms overlap a lot, btw.

I love play rehearsal, Cause’ you are equiped with direction and text, Life is easy in rehearsal, You follow a script so you know what comes next. Anywho the point that I’m getting to is sometimes life can’t work out in the way It works out in the play

this part screams autistic culture to me. unpredictability is scary because social situations don’t always go smoothly like in fiction! this is why social scripting is a popular therapy tactic for autistic children- you have to manually study social situations like a script. theater is something meant to be memorized and recited until you’re able to process it and manufacture emotion, but honestly for autistic kids, life feels a lot like that sometimes. remember how miserable she got when one of her favorite plays had the script changed without her permission to make a whole new story she doesn’t know? of course that’s just upsetting on its own, but in the context of her knowing theater so well and being fully prepared for one story only to be forced to learn a new one? ouch.

christine is never shown as comfortable outside her element- she hides in a book during “more than survive” and shrinks into nothing at the party. it’s a recurring theme that she has no idea exactly who she is, struggles with her identity outside of theater, and despite not really caring about how people see her, she does care about her own ability. socializing makes her feel awkward, especially when something totally unexpected happens like jake or jeremy asking her out. if she doesn’t have a plan or routine or, well, a script, then she can’t trust herself to go forward.

Like the only time I get to be the center of attention, Is when I’m Juliet or Blanche DuBois

as an autistic theater kid, i just really do relate to being clueless and dumb in real life but being able to totally thrive on the stage, because you can channel the energy that is usually misplaced in real life social interactions, and transfer it through dialogue and song and dance that someone else laid out nicely for you.

and can I mention? That was really one of my best roles, Did you see that?

an epic combination of letting your mind wander easily without caring about making sense to the person you’re speaking to, and taking every opportunity to infodump. in a lot of productions she even mimics her blanche voice just for fun. jeremy tries to respond here but she doesn’t care because she’s in her own brain where everything only really seems to make sense to her.

And no matter how hard I try, It’s impossible to narrow down the many reasons why, I love play rehearsal. I happiness cry whenever it starts!

if she isn’t being hyperbolic then this plays into my ‘so much emotion it’s hard to control’ thing detailed a bit above. either way, big special interest mood.

It’s just so universal Getting to try playing so many parts. Most humans do one thing for all of their lives, The thought of that gives me hives! I’ve got so many interests I wanna pursue,

it’s a lot easier to lose yourself and connect to your special interest than focus on your very complex, very overwhelming real life issues. escaping into fiction and being able to play in a variety of social situations as a totally different person, yay theater!

in general i just like the idea of christine struggling to visualize who she is and thinking about a lot of hypothetical but being unable to choose which one is most desirable or plausible. idk if that’s autistic or just a fun character trait lol. i know jumping from interest to interest is an adhd thing though.

this little passage is good for at least showing that christine distinguishes herself from ‘most humans’ in a way that isn’t so much ‘not like other girls’ but like ‘life is so much more confusing to me than it seems to be to others’ (which the show proposes isn’t exactly true and is the same closed-mindedness that jeremy has, though christine realizes it sooner; however; the sentiment rings true in that christine, as a neurodiverse young woman, has a lot more hoops to jump through than a neurotypical classmate.)

And why am I telling this to you? Guess there’s a part of me that wants to.

jeremy is also very autistic coded in my eyes, but that’s a separate post. i just like them being drawn to each other through that sort of kinship. also if you interpret her as having an unrealized requited crush on him…well, i think for a lot of us, romantic love is easy to confuse with friend love, if even that, because the specifics of emotions are a mess to unravel. (which also explains her confusion on her relationship with jake)

oh and right after this, she starts squawking just because she had the impulse to do so. vocal stimming, much?

Back to play rehearsal, My brain is like ‘bzzz’ My heart is like 'wow’

my brain is always like bzzz honestly lol. this is generally a pretty good way to describe being hyperfocused.

Because we’re here at play rehearsal, and it’s starting, We’re starting, It’s starting, Sooo-ooon.

it’s been confirmed as a deliberate decision that christine’s songs never end on a rhyme, except when she’s squipped and it isn’t ‘really’ her, because she subverts everyone’s expectations, including jeremy’s. i feel that could make for a nice simplified metaphor for autism, right?

#christine canigula #autistic headcanons #allistics can reblog!#be more chill #bmc #gif #long post #queue are so busted #i might do something like this for loser geek whatever and/or more than survive #or even just bmc songs in general if i cant get enough material from them individually #be more neurodivergent #kin tag

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unproduciblesmackdown · 5 years

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i love winston i love when he’s like

okay wait i’m having all these thoughts at once. i’m assuming taylor let winston name the Area for their rendezvous since they were hiring the quants in secret but it’s funny he’s just like hey meet me after math meetup but also okay the scene is funny because yknow taylor walks in and it’s just winston standing there in the middle of the room all Ready with his first line even prepared like “you ever done math meetup?” and then i imagined math meetup to just be an outright brawl because if the next beat was him picking up a chair to go into melee mode it’d work

sdghjfds and then taylor saying “is that what this is?” like imagine winston just going “no”

i love winston he goes off about his life crisis and depression and then taylors like okay let me just go ahead and cut in here. what else did winston have in this speech about how he promises he is chastened by self-loathing now

and yes this was the thing i was originally going to say i’m just in that classic “omg i am On your wavelength so hard rn winnie” when he says “well i...promise to try. but as far as successfully not being a dick, i can’t absolutely guarantee it. like i can my coding.”

and every time i’m like oh my god winston good job....what a measured, honest, genuinely helpful response. truly in this moment you’re showing taylor that you can be great at this if they give you a shot. amazing!! perfect!!!! poetry!!!!!! ilu

and then taylor gives them the Reprimanding Look and says the “there you go, [backsliding into being a dick] again” and even now that i Know that’s what happens in the scene i don’t #get it lol i can only Comprehend winston’s social perspective there lmao........in the furthest stretch i’m like okay was it just the “i can guarantee my coding” bit? but i’m kidding myself nah i still can’t see that or any other part as Obviously Rude Or Annoying or whatever like no it just all completely makes sense to me and really solid. i will never Get It

but the real moral i get out of all of this is that i think it’s great whenever they interact b/c they’re both mayhaps socially “”offputting”” and Unusual in different ways and i like that they seem to find it fairly easy to interact with each other....taylor keeps like just providing these subtle prompts to guide him whenever they’re talking which, literally every time winston appears he’s interacting with taylor so, yeah they’re using these small cues to send this extra layer of communication to winston about what they’d like him to do right in this moment. and meanwhile winston already in his second meeting imo i always interpret that as him trying to act a lot more taylor-esque in his second attempt, and then, yknow, he’s just like, he gets warningly told by taylor “don’t annoy anybody” and then he annoys his coworkers so hard they both just leave and winston, bless him, just Stays and keeps working until taylor shows up and then he’s like heyyyy....whats up lol. and what’s Gold is that taylor is clearly combining both their own previous phrasing and winston’s previous phrasing to say “you backslid into being a dick >:|” and winston’s just like Fine Yes Big Time sigh....i figure he stands up to potentially anticipate being fired lol but also possibly just cuz it’s a bit weird not to anyways seeing as its just them.....but the point is that at no point in any of his interactions with taylor does winston act like he’s intimidated or offput by them......he Defers to them for sure but like, yknow doesn’t act like anything they do when they’re just being how they’re always being is like, wow taylor is weird and this is something that bothers me at all

and like i mentioned with taylor basically quoting winston some number of days later, they’re also going along with his yngwie malmsteen metaphor even if they just initially shoot it down with that “sad.” lol....but anyways it’s evident that like, taylor is taking in this info about winston but not in a “winston you suck and i want to give you an extremely detailed report on why i think so” way but instead in a “i’m paying attention to you and retaining info about you and i’m using what i learn in the way we interact so we can get more on the same page communicatively. like taylor’s not just asking winston to kind of be conscious and rein himself in sometimes, they’re also Asking him by using the way he phrases things himself and visual cues he can parse....they’re making this effort to make things easier for him basically, aka meeting winston at this midway point where they’re both trying to be aware of and employ the other’s particular social/communication style so that said socializing/communicating just Works Better. like, it’s nice because taylor doesn’t “””””have””””” to devote the least amt of consideration to making adjustments for winston’s funky little social approach, but they do. and winston is always making an effort to watch for taylor’s cues and listens when they’re sent, and taylor is making the effort to send those cues. i just think they’re neat

and the ways in which they’re gonna be seen maybe by the average rando who’s unused to them as socially Weird / Difficult / Etc and the ways this can present problems for either of them is natch different from them both, but i think it’s also neat how even tho (weird/difficult) + (weird/difficult) might seem like it should = extra deluxe weird and difficult, really they just seem to have figured out how to interact with each other fairly well and done so fairly quickly/easily...they #get it when they’re talking...that Dynamic....which is also extra fun because of the ways that winston clearly contrasts with taylor, and that’s always going to be fun, especially when they’re actually working together so they’re gonna want to try to understand each other / be on the same page / agree / get along / etc etc.....love to see the outwardly real different characters just work well together and not be bothered

also will keeps mentioning he’s in more episodes of billions (not in those exact words but) and sounding lightheartedly pleased about it so i’m a) glad and b) hoping this means he makes it to s5......trying to pitch benston before they have the writing roundtable for that one or however writing for tv works. i have a bud literally in that line of work. I Will Never Inquire. like hey patch me through to the billions ppl in nyc, i know you’re in la and have been in this for a year so you have Every Connection and have just been waiting for me to ask

anyways winston and ben kim ought to be kissing. @ us about it

#everything gets tagged #winston billions

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kingofthewilderwest · 5 years

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Don't worry, I take over my sleep time to read and write fanfictions. I wouldn't have time otherwise! I have an entire Word page with only links to fanfictions I still have to read! And it's all right to not read fanfictions if you don't want to. It's just an hobby among others. Anyway, you wrote fanfictions?? Now I'm curious, could I have a link, if you don't mind? Have a good night too and sorry for my grammar mistakes, english isn't my first language (btw, thank you for the likes

From this. Sorry I’m slow replying!! thanks for your wonderful messages! :)

No worries about grammar! Your English is great, and even if it weren’t, that’s no bother to me either. :) The fact that you’re communicating in a language that isn’t your first… just means you have extra skills and are even more awesome! :)

I love how dedicated you are to looking at others’ fanfictions, even creating a Word document page to make sure you remember them. That’s beautiful and cool. And I’m getting curious about what you’ve written, too!

Thanks so much for asking about my fics - this touches me! Sure, I’m happy to share! I tend to post all fics on tumblr and FFN, with FFN being my primary hub. On tumblr I use the tag #my fanfiction and tag all stories by their title. My FFN profile is kingofthewilderwest.

I’m so so so so so SO touched when anyone reads or interacts with my fics (though since I write casually, I ask no constructive criticism

THE VIGILANTE’S WAR

HTTYD. YEAR: 2014. LENGTH: 57,110 WORDS. A mysterious, antagonistic dragon rider dubbed “the Vigilante” crosses paths with Hiccup, and her increasingly violent actions appear to be leading to war against Berk.

He tightened his hands, loosened them again. Breathed in, breathed out. He could feel himself stooped in the dirt, his shoulders hunched over his head, his knees buried in the ground and tucked underneath his torso. His neck was bent low close to the earth, providing him a good view of his hands and the ground and nothing else.

Well, and the blood.

That can’t possibly be all mine.

- PROLOGUE: FROM OUT OF THE HAZE

HTTYD 2′s original drafts had Valka as the main antagonist. I found this so interesting that I decided to rewrite HTTYD 2 - with a few of my own spins - on this concept. One of my most well-known fics, “The Vigilante’s War” is where I’ve gotten the most thorough reviews and most emotional reactions.

THE VIGILANTE’S LEGACY

HTTYD. YEARS: 2014-2016. LENGTH: 20,546 WORDS. There’s been four years of war between three factions. Drago’s army. The Vigilante and her dragons. Berk and their allies. But now, Chief Hiccup believes there’s a way to end the conflict. Sequel to “The Vigilante’s War.”

Hiccup spoke up. Cleared his voice. Tapped his pointer finger apprehensively on the cell’s iron door. “You said we were making a mistake.” Might as well speak straight to the point of his visit. “Something about ‘you and every one of your warriors are making a mistake’ or – or something like that.”

For a moment Hiccup wondered if Valka actually would reply. The calculating gaze she gave him from the corner of her prison certainly did not seem a positive sign. However, then, with a steady, lilting cadence to her voice, she succinctly affirmed, “I did.” Just those two words. Nothing more.

- VIII. THE MISTAKES OF WAR

It’s unfinished; I haven’t updated because I ran out of steam and didn’t receive enough reader feedback encouraging me to continue. Though I did have a very vivid final chapter in mind… that I still love… which I never got to…?

MEMOIRS

HTTYD. YEARS: 2015-2016. LENGTH: 44,289 WORDS. My ongoing collection of drabbles for HTTYD. Angst, pain, comfort, humor, crossovers, crack, it’s all there. Favorites include “Family Portrait,” “Stubble,” “Buffcup the Brawny,” and “Remember When.”

He held her hand softly, one wrinkled hand laid gently on top of another. It was just her and him now in the house all alone – for their children had left on a voyage with the grandkids, and would not be back for a week yet, if even two. It evoked the quietness of the old days, back before they were old, back during the times when they were newlyweds and younger even than their grandchildren were today. Oh, but the smell of her hair was just as refreshing now as when it was blonde.

- REMEMBER WHEN

DINNER AT DRAGON’S EDGE

HTTYD. YEAR: 2015. LENGTH: 5,452 WORDS. The gang’s settling in at Dragon’s Edge. To make sure everything operates smoothly, Hiccup suggests a chore rotation system. That means everyone has to do their fair share of the cooking… but it doesn’t mean everyone is a fair cook.

“Oh my gods, is this dinner or what the rats threw away?” Snotlout exclaimed, terrified at the Unidentified Edible Object before him.

Tuffnut picked it up with one experimental hand and held it out before him at a safe distance. People would have held poisonous snakes or bloodied torture devices more cheerily. Squinting his eyes and peering carefully at the peculiar specimen pinched between his fingers, rubbing under his chin with his other, free hand, Tuffnut remarked, “Looks something like what Barf and Belch poop out after they get sick and…”

- 1. ASSIGNING JOBS

This humorous fic I think is where I do best capturing HTTYD character personalities and interactions.

[SUPER]HERO THE HARD WAY

HTTYD. YEARS: 2014-2017. LENGTH: 86,566 WORDS. In a modern world where Berk is full of superheroes battling the League of Outcasts, power-less Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third struggles to receive appreciation for who he is. Through his crime-fighting journey, Hiccup learns that, while he might not have powers, he can become a Hero the Hard Way.

“I wasn’t born with anything. Don’t have anything. I’m the son of Chief Stoick “Skullcrusher” and I don’t have anything. Not even a superpower to turn objects purple. Which frankly would be completely pointless but at least it would have been something.“

He realized he was babbling and promptly shut his mouth. He looked over at Fishlegs, who appeared to be wordlessly processing the information. The teenager appeared baffled moreso than anything else, which at least meant he was not outright rejecting him.

“So you’re going to train to be a superhero… and you don’t have any powers? I got that right?”

“You got that right.”

“Wow.” Fishlegs said.

Hiccup waited for more.

“That’s actually really cool.”

- CHAPTER THREE: SIDEKICKED

This started as me intending to write one crack chapter. It turned into me envisioning a ROB / DOB modern AU where all characters were superheroes. The final product became a retelling of HTTYD 1′s basic concept: Hiccup gaining his peers’ approval despite being different. Somehow, despite me 70% adlibbing by the seat of my pants (should I be admitting this?), I had great fun. And it brought in the most reviews, follows, and favorites of any of my posted stories! Thanks for the reads and support, everyone!!!

RESET OR RESUME

UT. YEAR: 2016-2017. LENGTH: 85,841 WORDS. Gaster’s research unlocks the secret of time travel. After the Royal Scientist’s untimely end, one of Gaster’s colleagues - Sans - finds himself with the power to Reset. Confronted with unpleasant timelines and dangerous choices, Sans must decide how to navigate through time… if it’s worth resetting for a better future, continuing with hope for the present, or simply giving up.

No longer timid and silent, the human happily babbled all sorts of nonsense to Sans, everything from how to bake snow pies to how weird Sans’ skull looked to how beautiful the ribbon in their hair was to their opinions of Papyrus’ ‘battle body’ to how their mom didn’t like the color black to their personal opinion of ferrets to a long narrative of their encounter with a snail-loving old lady they met on the other side of the Ruins door. Everything could be the topic of a conversation. There was no filter and even less sense of restraint for this child.

“How are you a SKELETON?” their happy little high-pitched voice squeaked. They flew gallantly over a twig that rested, flat, on the surface of the snow. Powder flew everywhere as they landed heavily into the snowbank. “That means – that means you should be DEAD, you know!”

“who says i’m not dead?” Sans trolled with a wink.

With a shrieking giggle, they exclaimed, “Don’t be silly! Only ghosts are dead!”

“i could be a skeleton ghost.”

“No you – no you can’t.” The human seemed to be quite confident about their knowledge in paranormal metaphysics. “You can be a skeleton. You can be a ghost. But nobody – NOBODY – can be a skeleton ghost.”

“is that so?”

“YES so! You CAN’T be both. That would be wrong.” Maybe the human mentally categorized skeletons and ghosts as separate Halloween creatures, ensuring they were mutually exclusive concepts. It was always challenging to comprehend a child’s train of logic. “Except…” and now the child paused, leaning down and tugging at the sleeve of their sweater. Something thoughtful – at least as much as one so young could be thoughtful – passed over their eyes. They cocked their head to the side and stared at Sans. In the same sort of innocence with which they had talked about ferrets, the human inquired, “…can ghosts also be dust?”

- 5. KNOCKS [[File 5.2 IH-20150701-3-3]]

I have particular fondness for this fic. I spent more energy and care with this than any other I’ve posted. Drenched it through with UT lore. Edited and revised thoroughly. Had two beta readers examine my ASL for accurate representation. I wrote extensive outlines that were several page long color-coded charts, had all this meticulous structuring going on…

The problem was, this was an impossibly ambitious project. Life got in the way, too. The 85,841 words here aren’t close to the end of Part 1. The final two Parts were going to explain the weirdness within Part 1 (the story doesn’t begin in chronological order - it gets pieced together like a puzzle). What I planned to write would have included a complex characterization arc for Sans, every human child that’s visited the underground, and multiple resets containing main character deaths… until the story would end with Sans confronting Frisk in the Genocide Route.

Hopefully, despite the incompleteness, this is enjoyable from its comedy to its angst! I would at least encourage people to read the first few chapters! Or “Socks” - an entire chapter devoted to Sans and Gaster pulling sock pranks on each other.

SOMEHOW THEY’RE STILL OFFICERS

FMAB. YEAR: 2018-2019. LENGTH: 6,036 WORDS. Ahhhhhh yes. Team Mustang. The hand-selected, elite group of military officers who effectively spend their time… doing nonsense.

Everyone was scrambling at once. Mustang rushed forward to greet their guest, perfect composure only broken by the fast pace at which he moved. In fact the colonel’s posture was almost a proud enough display to make his lack of shirt go unnoticed. But Falman chucked his cards away at the same time he tried to salute; Breda was ducking from Falman’s sudden card shower; Fuery was launching pants and underwear in Havoc’s face; and Lieutenant Hawkeye, obviously abashed to be in this room at all, was covering her eyes with her hand in what was either her life’s longest sigh, or a pathetic attempt to hide her face and identity.

- WE WERE JUST PLAYING CARDS

My collection of FMA drabbles, particularly stories of Team Mustang shenanigans. Prompts / requests welcome for more adventures!

I have a few other drabbles posted, too. I also have unfinished chapters of Voltron fanfictions on my computer that I could share, too? Maybe I should? I’m currently working on several Royai fanfictions, other FMA drabbles, and a longer Deponia fanfiction.

Thank you again for being so nice and connecting with me over fanfiction and fandom and FMA and more. You’re a really wonderful and cool person and you made my day.

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coolthingsuxdesign · 3 years

Text

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No person as well as I repeat no person, is doing website design the pricey method (The truth: Some are still squandering money spending for web architecture). Those that has adequate cash, pay for their website design, and also those who can not will have to get their hands on a easy to use website design software application that does the job.

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Whatever kind of website design software your utilizing, you have to inform yourself with a little HTML. There is no chance around that. Once you get the feel for simple little HTML code snippets, you will see that you never ever before need to know more than that, due to the fact that you currently have my little ace in the hole (My secret website design software application, that I will certainly lead you to soon).

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alimonytony · 4 years

Text

This is a repost from my rant forum on my site and since I'm interested only in it being read, rather than advertising or shilling it out for hits, I'm going to just repost it here. Before I do let me give you a quick introduction.

I finally registered on the SA forums a week or so ago having been a loyal reader for a couple of years. I don't like the new design of the site, I want to kill it with fire, I liked my good-old Web1.0 scrolly site, give it back please.

I'm posting this here because you lot are smart, and as such, I have no issues with you telling me that you think I'm wrong with this pseudo-rant. This may also be preaching to the choir a bit and for that I sincerely apologize. I hope at least you get some enjoyment out of this. If you're one of those fellows who likes to Digg, the article also has a Digg page, do with it as you see fit - http://digg.com/general_sciences/At...you_intelligent

With that said and done, here goes.

"It's novello time, and it's about religion, so unless you're ready to deal with some views you may not agree with, switch off now. In the words of Illidan "You are not prepared".

Let's get this out here right now. I'm a 23 year old law graduate with an IQ of 155. My political beliefs are liberal and leftist, I listen to Metal and I enjoy violent movies, books and videogames, and I've been a Christian since birth. Baptised, confirmed of my own free will, son of a priest (who are pretty notorious for rebelling against their father's religious beliefs just for the sake of it). I'm part of the Anglican Church of England, which is pretty much the result of Henry the 8th getting pissed off with the catholics not allowing him to divorce his wife(s). We're the state religion of the UK, if you could even say the UK has one, we're pretty liberal about most things, women priests, gay priests, homosexuals in general, sex before marriage, contraception, we take the modern, reasonable way of looking at all of them. At the end of the day, the Bible taught us about forgiveness and being excellent to one another. It had a bit of a round-about way of doing it but what do you expect for a 2000 year old book written entirely by clerical males? It's gonna be a bit out of date, you've gotta read it in context.

I have no problems with anyone's beliefs. Be whatever you want, as long as you believe (or don't believe) for a good reason. But here's what I really don't like, trend-atheism/trend-theism (also referred to as e-atheism, since it seems to be most prevelant in the domain of anonymous blogspammers and Digg-users).

In my late teens, I spent a long time thinking. Yeah, just sitting around and thinking, thinking about faith. Thinking about what it is that I believe in. Rationalizing the various conflicts and contradictions that faith presents us with, looking at the viewpoints of other faiths, or those with no faith at all, taking into account the new things we discover every day and factoring in the influence of science. Some people would claim that, if I had indeed done that, I'd have come to the conclusion, as an intellectual, rational thinker, that God does not exist. They would of course, be wrong.

My beliefs center around several factors. Firstly, it is important for us as human-beings to realize our own limits, and the limits of our understanding. Centuries ago we believed the world was flat. "The Bible told us so!", would be the first cry. Wrong, it really didn't. In the Old Testament, Job 26:7 explains that the earth is suspended in space, the obvious comparison being with the spherical sun and moon. The Old Testament, you remember that one? The one with the fiery bushes, the pillar's of salt, the cool plagues and such? Even that managed to get it right. There's a few more references as well to the 'round' earth (and before you say anything, flat is not a shape, it could have been a flat octagon for all they knew) but I'm not going to go into that yet. We've had computers for less than a century, powered flight for just over a century and of course our amazing horseless carriages. Genetics, electricity, nuclear-bombs, toaster-strudel, the world is in the palm of our hands! And it didn't take us too long did it?

Reality-check, we're still primitives. In the great scheme of things this technology is a mere blip on the historical radar. We've got an awful long way to go before we're able to dissect and understand the mysteries of the universe. We haven't even put a man on Mars yet, let alone left our solar system to find out what exactly is out there. How can it be that we have suddenly, so recently, become so arrogant as to believe we know more than we really do? The Laws of Science are written by man, based on our understanding of how things work. They are theories that, while prove true today, may be debunked by another amazing discovery tomorrow. Which leads onto my next point.

Name this quote "Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic". Arthur C Clarke, physicist and author, smart fellow. It also hilights the point I'm making. Our understanding of the universe is peerless only amongst ourselves. We are not as smart as we think we are. Just as fire wowed the neanderthals, what would it take to wow us? What would make our jaws drop and our minds boggle? Well, any sufficiently advanced technology of course. And what is technology after-all? Man-made machines. The concept of technology is a human concept, a concept that may, in other parts of the universe, not even exist, replaced by something even more advanced than that, so advanced that we cannot comprehend it. Not surprising really as we mammals only use 10% of our brains.

So where am I going with this? Simple really, take yourself off of your high-horse, you, and the human race, is not as smart as it thinks it is. Now, open your mind a little, and let's explore some possibilities.

The definition of a God. Let us turn to the good book.

Wikipedia.

"God most commonly refers to the deity worshipped by followers of monotheistic and monolatrist religions, whom they believe to be the creator and ruler of the universe. Theologians have ascribed a variety of attributes to the various conceptions of God. The most common among these include omniscience, omnipotence, omnipresence, perfect goodness, divine simplicity, and eternal and necessary existence. God has also been conceived as being incorporeal, a personal being, the source of all moral obligation, and the "greatest conceivable existent"

Hmm, a tall order one might think. Could such a being exist? Some argue that logically, he could not, however, there is very little logic in denying the possibility that a being or beings of such power and advancement exist that they could indeed, be considered 'God' within our definition. That's not to say that God is a small green alien with a flying saucer and a phaser though that would give some of the overzealous fundamentalists something to sweat over, much to our amusement. But what is this God? A creator? Sure, we create. We create technology, we're getting to the stage of being able to create life in one form or another, using the basic building blocks of nature. Could it not be surmised therefore that it is entirely within the realms of possibility that someone or something created those building blocks? Like a programmer creates a new program, someone must have also created the coding language in which he created it. We scramble for answers. We come up with theories. Some believe in the beginning there was nothing, which exploded. Some believe a man in the sky created it everything in 6 days and then mooched around on the 7th. Which is valid?

Neither, and both. They attempt to apply meaning to something where meaning may, or may not exist. Creationism and the Big Bang are in that sense, as bad as each other. They are both merely attempts for us to explain the unexplainable. The Big Bang contradicts our laws of physics (something most catalyse an explosion, therefore something must have been there in the first place, where did that come from, at which point your brain melts). The Creation Story contradicts our laws of physics (Same reasons, who created God after all?). Everything we've so far managed to come up with, from the sublime to the ridiculous, the complex to the simplistic, it's an exercise in desperate straw-clutching. At the end of the day, we don't know jack.

And that's ok. Someone once said that the journey matters more than the destination, it's not the winning, it's the taking part, at least ya tried sport. These explanations of where it all comes from, be they ancient or modern all boil down to the same need. To know. Who'd have thunk it, we've got brains for a reason, and they rather like being used. Those neurons like to be fired, the little grey matter likes a little exercise every once in a while. Just as the Creation Story was a way to explain an unexplainable concept, so is the Big Bang theory. If one were to compare the human mind to a computer, try feeding the Big Bang theory to the medieval man, and it's like trying to shove Bioshock into a Commodore Vic20. Good luck. And what will our children's children's children's grandchildren's children think of our Big Bang theory? My money's on exactly the same thing.

So what am I trying to tell you, stop asking questions, stop looking for answers and just believe whatever the hell suits ya? Absolutely not. Believe whatever suits you, but question it, never stop thinking, never stop asking or learning. In this day and age it seems people are way too willing to believe, or not believe. Belief, or non-belief should be a life-long arduous process and it should end involuntarily, when you fall over dead. Someone (there's a lot of talkative someone's aren't there?) once said 'Never stop believing', I say, "Never stop asking yourself what you believe, and why".

It's time to criticize, so let me load port and starboard cannon and fire a volley at both atheists and theists alike. Believing, or not believing, does not make you intelligent. Smart people do not come to a conclusion on the basis of insubstantial evidence. Smart people do not mindlessly attack other people's beliefs just because they don't conform to their own. Smart people do not assume that their own rigid, poorly formed definitions of logic and faith, reason and belief are mutually exclusive and that if one exists, the other cannot. Smart people think outside the box, not pick fights with those poor souls trapped in it.

What makes you intelligent, is knowing why you believe what you believe. Knowing that you are but one mind, and knowing that at any time you could be proven wrong, only for that person to be proven wrong ad infinitum as we as a race advance.

I suppose you're waiting for my personal beliefs, waiting for this to be some kind of sermon, preaching why my God is better than your God, or non-God. You'll be waiting a long time, because it's not coming. My personal beliefs are just that, personal, they're mine, they belong to me. You cannot take them away from me, only I can. What I can give you though, are my opinions.

Right now shots are being fired. They're not physical shots, they're bullets and shells of ignorance and bigottry. And it's no one-sided battle let me tell you that much. Factionalized camps everywhere you can imagine. Atheists, Theists, Satanists, Christians, Republicans, Democrats, Capitalists, Communists, every group you can imagine, all shouting 'Your God/Non-God sucks, mine is better!'. These days, the internet's become their battleground. So much for sharing knowledge, we're sharing ignorance.

The bigottry and the condemnation has to stop. The sad thing is, I'm having to condemn the condemners. Isn't it lowsy how you generally have to be a hypocrite in order to make a point these days? Food for thought. We can look at the extremes and see the simplistic, secular vs sacred, trend-atheists vs fundamentalist evangelical christians, the most common stereotypes. But in reality, it's so much more complicated than that. It's this stereotyping and narrow-minded attitude that prevents us as a race from achieving the greatness we can. I could make as many decrees as I wanted till I was blue in the face, and I'm going to just to let off a little steam mind you,

"Trend-atheist Digg users, shove your agendas where the sun don't shine, refusing the possibility of a supreme-being does not make you a genius or a radical thinker, it makes you a bloody sheep hiding behind a cloak of anonymity"

"Evangelical Fundamentalist morons, get your overly simplistic, judgmental, dogmatic Crayola God out of my face, you have about as much understanding of the universe as a wet lettuce. That does not make you holy, pure, or guaranteed a private booth at the big game in the sky, it makes you a bloody sheep hiding behind a cloak of propaganda that you only believe because you're told to"

Wow, that feels good, I can understand why you internet-bound condemners like it so much. Gives you that warm, fuzzy feeling doesn't it? What, I'm not allowed to indulge in such a guilty pleasure every once in a while? Play fair Wink

Where's my conclusion? Hell if I know. Did you have the mistaken impression this was some carefully constructed plea for tolerance? Absolutely not, it's an angry slap in the face to my peers. Wake the hell up and use your brain, because my God/Non-god/Explosion/Man-in-the-sky/Vic20 gave you it for a reason.

TB.

#long post #a classic

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rafi1228 · 5 years

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