Starting to think I need an extra disclaimer on my books.
"Author has a high tolerance for pain and thresholds may be skewed because of it. Also, there will be some confusion between pain and pleasure. I am aware this makes me a freak. I am not sorry. I just want you to be informed."
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parents of disabled kids will be like “we know our kid is disabled but we just won’t tell them about it. we don’t want them to think they’re less valuable than other kids. we don’t want them to feel limited by their disability, we want them to know they’re capable of anything.”
meanwhile those kids are growing up thinking “why is everything so much harder for me than it is for everyone else? there’s no reason i shouldn’t be able to just do this. i guess i’m just a failed, broken person.”
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hey, i'm having some trouble doing my T shot tonight, how did stan get past his own trouble? i'm not SCARED or anything, it just doesn't wanna like. y'know, actually shot in.
Stan takes a deep breath, resets himself, and creates imaginary support and or good ol fashioned peer pressure to occupy his mind
(or sometimes counts to 3 and shoots it on 2, which I mention in this other post)
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oh but what do you see in harry why do you like him so much whats so good about him he stinks hes an addict hes done fucked up shit hes not even cute how can you find anything attractive in him how do you find anything good like AAAAAAAA
ITS ABOUT CHOICE! THERES SO MANY BAD OPTIONS TO CHOSE FROM BUT THERE IS STILL AN OPPORTUNITY TO DO SOMETHING INCREDIBLY KIND AS HARRY
YOU CAN BE AN ULTRALIBERAL YOU CAN BE A MORALIST A FASCIST EVEN BUT YOU CAN ALSO CONSCIOUSLY CHOSE NOT TO PURSUE ANY OF THESE ROUTES
ITS ABOUT HAVING CAPACITY TO DO GOOD IN A WORLD THAT ACTIVELY DISCOURAGES YOU FROM IT IN A SYSTEM THAT EVEN PUNISHES YOU FOR IT
ITS ABOUT CAPACITY FOR CHANGE ITS ABOUT THE BEAUTY OF HUMAN RESILIENCE
and honestly so what if hes an addict! im surrounded by addicts! theres an alcoholic living next door theres acoholics at a family function theres a bunch sitting at a bench near the church or at the park theres an addict i love theres an addict i just met or some that i just heard of and some are kind some are not some are trying to get help some arent some stopped using and some havent and they all deserve at least the basic modicum of respect and kindness and aid harry might be fictional but all his troubles and ailments are not theyre real things that happen to real people! and i do empathize with that! sometimes i even relate! and it does make me love him as a character very much!
and frankly i dont care if hes conventionally attractive im tired of conventionally attractive im tired of seeing the same cardboard cutout of a pretty face and perfect abs okay! i find the receding hairline delightful! i love a belly! thick arms are wonderful! i dont care that his ass is flaccid thats where all our asses head towards and theres beauty in it! and in the flamboyant mismatched clothing and weird hairstyles and questionable facial hair! and idc abt the bloating or the redness i have a red face too! perpetually! i think its cute! and its also a testament to the resilience of human body and it is inherently beautiful to me!
and he stinks bc hes on a bender and forgot everything and doesnt even know what money is give him time honestly you can work up to a good hygiene and a good routine
okay im done goodbye
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Editing uncomfortable scenes, making them worse, cackling like a fairytale witch until these words make my skin crawl.
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maybe a hot take but please don’t have or stop having children if you have an active eating disorder/body dysmorphia (including binge eating, not just restrictive disorders). seriously
thinking you’ll be the exception (because you’re So self-aware, unlike those Other disordered women) and won’t give your dysmorphia/eating disorder to your child is pride before a very slow and terrible fall
it never ever works. you’re never ever immune. i mean, such a huge reason of why there are so many of us now is bc our moms thought the same thing lmfao. didn’t matter how well-intentioned they were. no matter how much they tried to separate Their Problems from Ours. here we fucking are
i know it’s not women’s fault to begin with, but the reality is that those of us affected do incubate, nurture, and pass on the virus in the Current Way of Things
the buck needs to stop here. this isn’t a game. think of all the things your mother probably thought she was expertly hiding from you that you still picked up on and were profoundly affected by in a terrible and formative way. it will happen to you, too. don’t think it won’t.
if you know that you’re not solidly and confidently recovered, you have a responsibility to stop that buck and not actively attempt to create a child who will observe, mimic, internalize, adopt, and inherit your lifelong life-ruining behavior. the selfishness is breathtaking honestly
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