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piscadilly · 1 year

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NO OKAY I HAVENT TALKED ABOUT THIS IN A WHILE ANYWHERE but

it honestly bothers me SO FUCKING BAD that the MOMENT i drop he/him pronouns, or stop calling myself a man, people will automatically assume i'm a woman of some form, or, god forbid, a transfem.

like, i am not a man! i am comfortable with irl spaces perceiving me as one because at least theyre not perceiving me as woman but i am a xenogender nonbinary weirdo who presents androgynous (in the sense of classically masculine and simultaneously my personal version of femininity)

and i am NOT a transfem either and i think it's really weird how both cis people AND OTHER NONBINARY PEOPLE will shove me in /w them which is extremely weird and projecting invasiveness onto me ??

NONBINARY ISN'T A THIRD SINGULAR GENDER, THE GENDER SPECTRUM ISN'T A TRINARY, AND NONBINARY ISN'T WOMAN-LITE

i am so sick and goddamn tired of being considered as a woman of woman adjacent because of my aesthetics, favorite color, or even cutesy neopronouns. i don't like saying shit about my agab, i don't even like outright labeling what my fucking gender is, i am fine /w people only knowing my name and pronouns in that regard because IT DOESNT FUCKING MATTER

but it matters again as soon as i stop calling myself he, or a man. because if i don't use he/him pronouns online, if i don't outright label myself as a man, suddenly i MUST be the 'opposite' gender

you are enforcing a binary onto me that i do not fucking subscribe to and the fact that fellow nonbinaries have done this to me as well pisses me off so bad that whenever it happens i see red

#not ENTIRELY related but other nonbinary people have also tried to include me in lesbian attraction before and honestly?#fuck off #Fuck. Off.#not all nonbinary people are included in lesbian attraction so stop including me #its gross and creepy! wlw and wlnb who are not bi should not be attracted to me!#just bc i'm not a man doesn't mean that i'm automatically a woman or aligned with womanhood or woman adjacent #it is misgendering at best and transphobic at worst to say 'lesbians can be attracted to you'#or even tell ME that i myself can be a lesbian #like i am so far removed from that camp in every way possible and yet people will still find a way to be gross to me #and this is why i feel like i have to call myself a man bc if i dont people will have a field day #about where i could and should belong in terms of orientation and identity #you dont get a say about those pertaining to other people

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pastadoughie · 6 months

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Just to be clear you don't hate everyone who likes mushrooms and frogs, right? I like mushrooms because they're living representations of entropy and decay and some are so similar to humans that eating them can cause diseases related to cannibalism, and I like frogs because they're fucked up slime dwellers. Is that bad in your eyes?

i dont think that liking frogs or mushrooms makes you bad no, infact i dont think that thinking any plant or animal makes you a bad person, i just dont personally like frogs i find them gross

i do however have issue with the people who are like, weird about me *not* likeing those things, like, thats a fucking massive red flag in so many fucking ways

a) im uncomfortable that people even assume these things about me and moreover that theyre upset when their assumptions are proven wrong. my opinion shouldnt mean ANYTHING to you! you dont know me! and its really uncomfortable going on the internet to post your cat art and then all of a sudden find people acting overly familiar with you when you dont know them and have never interacted with them! i am not some large internet figure and its not ok to treat me that way! you should not be forming any kind of parasocial relationship with a 16yr old cat artist! thats weird and fucked up on so many levels!

b) the idea that i as a queer person "have to" have certain opinions and act a certain way (on things that are just, entirely harmless and meaningless) for some of you to like me is REALLY concerning. like if you genuinely think less of me because i dont like frogs when im a queer person then that makes me really concerned about all the other shit you expect me to do.

i have had alot of experience with people who do fit into those gay stereotypes of loving mushrooms and frogs and a CONCERNINGLY LARGE AMMOUNT OF THEM are like, a year away from falling into just full blown violent transphobia, the willingness to gatekeep what queer people are allowed to do and the idea that they HAVE to like certain things is like, it just makes it very clear that even if you arent a transphobe (or atleast dont THINK of yourself as one) your willingness to gatekeep these things makes you REALLY REALLY suseptible to BECOMEING one.

back when i used to be a lesbian and was in alot of these supposedly queer accepting and friendly spaces i found this out the hard way, when i started questioning my gender, and starting to not conform as much i had so many people who i thought were my friends talking about how i wasnt "allowed" to call myself enby AND a lesbian, and that im just someone trying to force myself into lesbian spaces, that i wasnt "allowed" to use he/him pronouns, because that makes other trans people LOOK bad, as soon as i stopped directly fitting into their veiws of a "respectible" queer person i realized that no. this isnt what a queer accepting space looks like.

and so thats why, i am extremely cautious around anybody who fits into that stereotype. its not *about* frogs, its not *about* mushrooms. its about how people who make these distinctions about what is an ok and not ok way to be queer will immediately turn on me the seccond i dont fit into that. and im not comfortable having those kinds of people around me

#the beast speaks #this is so long lol #retchid opinions

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transmascissues · 1 year

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a lot of people aren't going to want to hear this, but if you actually want trans men to stop "playing up" our assigned sex/"female socialization" or "walking back" on our manhood in conversations, here's what you need to do:

accept that it is possible for men (yes, 100%-men-and-nothing-but-men) to experience gendered oppression, including misogyny. accept that it is entirely possible for captial-m Men to have a lifetime worth of experiences with misogyny. accept that it is possible for men to be not just hurt by but systemically oppressed under the patriarchy. accept that being oppressed for one's gender does not require any proximity to womanhood. accept that it is possible for men to experience the things you call "women's issues". stop calling the misogyny specifically directed at us "misdirected". stop acting like our manhood somehow cancels out the oppression we've experienced. stop considering yourself more of an authority on our oppression than we are just because we're men and you're not. stop supporting activist spaces that expect men to "shut up and listen and be good allies" while everyone else task about their oppression. stop simplifying the complexities of gendered oppression to "man = privileged, woman = oppressed". you would distance yourself from your identity too if people used it to gaslight and silence you about your lived experiences.

stop acting like being a man makes someone somehow "less trans" or "less queer". learn how to view all trans people as equally trans and equally part of the community. unlearn your tendency to view manhood and masculinity as inherently less queer than other gender expressions. stop talking about how trans men are "the weakest link" or making "jokes" about how much worse we are than other people in the community or blaming us for all of its problems. stop acting like being men means we have less of a right than other trans people to speak on what it's like to be trans. you would distance yourself from your identity too if you knew that doing so would mean being more accepted by the community you rely on.

deconstruct your belief that cis manhood is the gold standard of manhood. stop telling trans men that it's transphobic for them to assert that their experience of manhood might be different from that of a cis man. stop trying to pressure trans men into never acknowledging how their transness makes their experience of manhood unique by accusing them of "misgendering themselves" or "saying trans men aren't real men". accept that trans men are not cis men and never will be cis men and are still 100% very real men anyway because cis manhood is only one type of manhood. understand that if you hear "trans men are different from cis men" and think that means "trans men aren't men", you're the one who's actually saying cis men are the only real men. you would distance yourself from your identity too if people said that claiming that identity required being exactly the same as a group you're not a part of.

get yourself a personality that isn't just talking about how much you hate men. stop telling all the men in your life how much you hate men and acting like their willingness to just take it is a measure of their moral goodness. stop making "jokes" about how trans men are "joining the enemy". stop talking about how much you wish you weren't attracted to men, or how much of a shame it is that someone else is. stop acting like womanhood and femininity are inherently pure and good and harmless while manhood and masculinity are inherently gross and evil and dangerous. stop acting like there's something inherently corruptive about existing as a man that fundamentally changes someone the second they come out as one. stop acting like it's funny to say you want to kill all of us as if there aren't countless people actively working to eliminate us. you would distance yourself from your identity too if everyone you knew spent their free time talking about how much they hate it.

help put spaces and resources into place that take trans men into consideration. stop getting mad at trans men who "call themselves men but still want access to women's spaces" and start looking at the world around you and asking why we want access to those spaces. open your eyes and realize that there is nothing out here for us, that all of the spaces and resources catered toward our experiences are marketed for everyone except us. ask yourself where the hell we're supposed to go when every clinic specializing in care for our bodies is a "women's clinic", when the only men's shelters are really just for cis men and the people advocating for "inclusive" shelters see all men as a threat to be warded off, when no one is willing to make an actual place for us and we have no choice but to just find the place that looks the least risky and hope they let us stay. put some effort into making this world more hospitable for us. you would distance yourself from your identity too if the resources you need to survive were offered for every identity but yours.

actually show trans men some fucking love for once in your life. find it in your heart to actually give a shit about trans men, to see us as real whole people who are deserving of love and community, to see our needs and feelings as worth your time and energy. care about us, care about our lives, care about our health and happiness and well-being instead of abandoning us the second we come out as men. start valuing our presence in the community and realize that we actually have a lot to offer if you could just listen to us. ask yourself why you're so comfortable leaving us to fend for ourselves in a world that wants us dead and is currently being very loud about that fact. you would distance yourself from your identity too if the community that supported you for years suddenly stopped caring about you the second you embraced it.

y'all will spend all day talking about how horrible it is that some trans men emphasize that they were assigned/raised female but nobody actually cares why so many of us do that. no one actually bothers to ask why we would put so much effort into being recognized as men but be afraid to fully claim that identity. no one wants to consider that they might be part of the problem, that they might be partially responsible for the thing they're complaining about.

if you want trans men to be able to stand firmly in our manhood and not undermine it with a million disclaimers, you have to actually put in the work to create an environment that's less hostile to trans men who do stand firmly in it.

because right now, regardless of my own personal opinions on the ways some trans men talk about their experiences as "afabs" or their "female socialization" or being "men but not like that", regardless of what issues i personally have with those kinds of statements, i can't blame them. not one fucking bit. and if you actually looked at how the world treats us - how our own community treats us - when we do fully own our manhood, you would feel the same way.

and if you aren't willing to do these things - which are literally just basic respect and care for other human beings, by the way - you don't get to complain about the ways trans men deal with how people like you treat our manhood. you can't expect a problem to disappear when you won't even acknowledge the part you might play in causing it.

#just saw yet another bit of socialization discourse and im so tired of the back and forth that i gave in and decided to Post About It #people love to notice trans men doing a thing and get mad at the thing without ever wondering why the thing happens in the first place #it's honestly incredibly dehumanizing #because it treats us like one dimensional things with no motivation other than Do Bad Man Things #instead of as whole complex people whose actions are motivated by complicated mental processes #transandrophobia #transandromisia #transmisandry #virilmisia #virilphobia #anti transmasculinity #trans men #transmascs

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thydungeongal · 2 months

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(On anon for controversial take)

I think that "not engage with media made by bigots" is not really a political demand that's possible to maintain.

There are undeniably media that are built on hate and to spread hate, like Turner's Diary or works on Esoteric Hitlerism. And there are media that while didn't mean it are absolutely gross and harmful, like South Park.

But a lot of works contain some elements that are... insensitive. I am not saying that we shouldn't talk about that, we absolutely have to, and we have to make sure that creators are aware of it, but "never engage with anything problematic" is absolutely not doable. It will just turn into utilizing progressive language to win internet debates, same as pro/anti fracture.

And like, humans are very diverse, and it means not only that there are a lot of groups of people but that people in the same groups may have different opinions. Of course finding one marginalised person who is chill with some shit is just manipulation (I heard about some black celebrity who straight up says that racism is not real, so you could prove whatever this way), and it's equally manipulative to find one who is offended by something (saw a couple of Greeks who are offended by non-Greeks using art and culture from Classical Antiquity, Greeks are not POC or anything but ethnic minority and I couldn't from the top of my head remember anything clearly absurd). But like sometimes there is a pretty prominent split. Some time ago there was a series of posts about how for some disabled people magical cure of character's disability feels like erasure and for some as wish fulfillment. I saw both East Asians who are fans of ATLA specifically for its handling of East Asian cultures and those who consider it racist garbage.

I think the jump from "don't support media made by active bigots" to "you are not allowed to engage with any media if it has any even slightly problematic things" is an interpretation of your own making and not one made by the post you are reacting to. I personally am a big fan of problematic media, but when I see an author funneling money into a transphobic cause it's actually very easy for me to say "oh dang I won't engage with that media in any way."

Like, yes, there is of course nuance here. I'm not a fan of moral purity tests on media. But I think people are capable of seeing that an author is actively doing harm by supporting horrible causes and making the decision to disengage from their work due to not wanting to support any kind of ecosystem for the discussion of that media.

There's no hard and fast rules here, but I feel a lot of people fall on rationalizations that are actually really infantilizing when trying to explain why they simply can't disengage from media.

#thydungeongal answers

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youremyheaven · 21 days

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Rahu & Ketu: The Nodal Urge To Rebrand ✨

I got an ask several days ago that triggered some thoughts✨in me lol. A lot of people in the public eye often have a drastic change in image? where they go from one extreme to another and the person who asked me about this also suggested that perhaps its a Nodal (Rahu + Ketu) thing to swing between extremes. So, i did some digging and turns out it is indeed true. It is a very Nodal tendency to rebrand yourself and be in the public eye in several different avatars.

The Rahu naks are: Ardra, Swati & Shatabhisha

The Ketu naks are: Ashwini, Magha & Mula

5/6 of these nakshatras belong to the Shudra caste which is the lowest caste (Outcaste naks exist outside the caste system entirely). Ashwini is the only Nodal nakshatra that is not Shudra caste and as you will see, it does not show up as often in the placements for any of the people I'll mention on this post. The themes of Ashwini and its place in the hierarchy are all different compared to the other Nodal naks. All that said, broadly speaking when one is Shudra caste and at the bottom of the hierarchy, one is always trying to climb up the ladder and be "accepted" by mainstream society, this means embodying different avatars at different times. This is only a partial explanation as to what contributes to this specific nature of Nodal natives. The other explanation is that both Rahu & Ketu are disembodied and never feel "whole". Every other planet brings with it certain structure, principles, qualities and boundaries, Rahu & Ketu being shadow planets lack any of this. Lacking form, lacking definition, lacking any inherent purpose means limitless freedom to be anyone or anything. Most people feel bound by their identity, they're x so they can't be y. But when you have no inherent identity, you can be xy and the whole alphabet lol and that kind of seems to be what a lot of these people embody.

Arnold Schwarzenegger- Mula Moon

Arnold was a bodybuilder, he later became an actor and after that turned to politics and was the Governor of California. Most people cannot devote themselves to one career and he's had 3 incredibly successful careers. He wasn't some average bodybuilder, he was one of the greatest, he was Mr Universe, he isn't a particularly talented actor but he worked his strengths (action movies) and has starred in some of the most iconic films of all time?? and his movies have grossed over $1 billion and he served two terms as a Governor?? yk how many celebrities have turned to politics and failed lol? He also married into the Kennedy family. He has Pushya Sun and a Punarvasu stellium so I will attribute his longevity and continued success to that but the rebranding is def on his Mula Moon.

Drake, Ardra Moon

I dont even think most people now know this but Drake was a teen actor initially. He was on the show Degrassi yearsss before he became a rapper.

Ricky Gervais, Ardra Sun & Mercury, Mars in Magha and Ketu in Shatabhisha

Ricky Gervais started his career in the 80s as a singer and was part of a synth pop duo named Seona Dancing before he turned to stand up comedy and writing.

Dwayne Johnson, Mula Moon

He was an extremely successful WWE wrestler before he switched to acting. Now he's one of the highest paid actors.

Taylor Swift, Ardra Moon

She was a teen country singer before she became a popstar. Not many people who cross-over can do it successfully. Taylor is an anomaly.

Caitlyn Jenner, Swati Sun, Rahu & Rising

She was an Olympic medal winning world class athlete then a reality star and now a transphobic weirdo who is a transwoman

Lady Gaga, Swati Moon

Gaga went from being an edgy avant garde popstar to being a method actor?? lol, she's definitely channelling old hollywood starlet these days for sure

Troye Sivan, Magha Moon & Mars, Rahu in Swati, Ketu in Ashwini

he was a teen YouTube sensation before he became a mainstream singer. very few people successfully shed their influencer image and Troye is one of them

Taylor Momsen- Swati Moon

she was a child star, then a teen star on Gossip Girl and is now vocalist of a rock band

Brie Larson- Swati Moon

she was a child actor, released music as a teenager, then was a supporting actor in indie films and then became an Oscar winner was most notably Captain America

Drew Barrymore, Shatabhisha Sun

Drew was a child star, then later did some edgy roles (after she went to rehab, was emancipated etc) and posed nude for Playboy etc, then started doing romcoms in the 2000s and is now a vv successful daytime TV host

Katy Perry- Swati Sun & Rising

she started out with church music before becoming a pop star and now TV personality

Madonna- Magha Rising & Mercury with Ketu in Ashwini

She went from like S&M sex bomb to Evita to Earth Mother, and several personas and styles in between. she's had more personas than i can count tbh

Matthew McConaughey, Swati Sun & Mercury

all throughout the 2000s he was best known as a romcom leading man not a serious actor and now he's an Oscar winner

Ariana Grande, Ardra Sun

Ariana was a supporting actor on a Nickelodeon show and now she's one of the biggest popstars ever. not many people can do that (manyyy child star turned singers have flop careers)

Snoop Dogg- Ashwini Rising, Swati Mercury conjunct Venus

He was a rapper who was frequently in and out of prison. He later converted to Rastafari and released an album based on it and then converted to Christianity and released a gospel record and now is just some weird stoner uncle when he used to go to award shows with half naked girls on leashes

Rihanna, Shatabhisha Sun

when i was growing up Rihanna was a singer who released music pretty much every year but she's now a billionaire businesswoman who sells makeup and lingerie

Martha Stewart, Mula Moon, Swati Rising

she was a model, then a stockbroker and then became a TV personality

Zendaya, Ashwini Moon

she was a disney child star, a singer and became a hyper-successful fashionista who also acts

Rooney Mara, Ashwini Sun

she had a complete change in image and went from playing supporting roles to being an avant garde serious art movie actor

Dua Lipa, Magha Sun

Dua had a veryy different style and sound back in the day before she embraced the 80s synth sound and rock-glam style and became a pop princess

Lana Del Rey, Ardra Sun

she used to sing under her real name Lizzy Grant and made vv different kind of music before she became Lana Del Rey

these are all the examples i can think of rn, lemme know if you have other examples in mind<33 ill add more if i find them

#astrology notes #vedic astro notes #sidereal astrology #astrology observations #nakshatras #astro notes #astro observations #vedic astrology #astrology #astroblr #rahu #ketu #jyotish #swati #shatabhisha #magha #mula #ardra #ashwini

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omegalomania · 2 years

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Wait why does everyone hate brendon urie again?

i was tempted to just say "google it" but honestly panic's pr team is working doubletime to sanitize this bastard so here's a quick primer for those who are out of the loop.

this got long so i’m putting it under a cut. as a warning, this is going to have discussions and screenshots of people saying and doing extremely morally reprehensible shit, including racist, homophobic, and transphobic language, sexual harassment of minors, and more. tread with caution.

i'm also going to top this off with the caveat that brendon has a history of saying generally stupid and casually shitty things that a lot of people have noticed and called attention to, but these were largely unremarkable in the sense that they were the sort of things that i was not surprised to hear a privileged cis dude say. so while that's definitely a factor - the guy has said very shitty, openly racist, gross things, etc., numerous times and on numerous platforms and i do not want to overlook that - i also don't want to pretend like that’s the only thing going on here because there is a lot of other heinous shit at work.

i’m also not going to go into the intricacies of song meanings or lyrics and the like aside from a couple touchstone examples. it’s pretty public knowledge by now that i don’t know how but they found me (henceforth referred to as idkhow, fronted by dallon weekes, who worked/toured with panic for a good eight years as its bassist) has quite a few numbers that take implicit and explicit aim at panic, most prominently the video for their single “do it all the time,” which featured dallon setting fire to all the suits he used to wear on tour with the band. it’s an open secret that dallon was not treated very well during his time with panic, but we’ll get to that. the point here is that i don’t want to focus on conjecture of speculation when we have a wealth of very hard evidence at our disposal.

so let’s get into it.

the real Poop started up late 2019 iirc, when numerous panic fans started passing around stories about zack hall, panic's bodyguard and security guy who had been with the band since the fever era. as the only person who had actually been with the band as long as brendon himself, zack had a fair amount of sway with the fans and was notably very very close with brendon. as more and more people spoke up, it became apparent that zack had done a whole lot of things that i would term as "incredibly fucked up" over the years with people being generally afraid to say anything. it’s been pointed out to me that these accusations only picked up traction around that time; fans have been raising flags about zack’s behavior for years without any reaction from panic’s management.

around this time, discussion began circulating that brendon himself had sexually harassed/assaulted multiple fans (many of them minors at the time). some of these accusations, such as his attempt to solicit nudes from fans, have proven to be way muddier to and harder to confirm, seeing as brendon was allegedly not in charge of his socials for some of this time and one of the people using his handles to solicit fans for nudes was reportedly a former stalker of his, chelsey lynn.

i think it is worth noting that brendon has brought up his history with “stage gay” with founding member, guitarist, composer, and lyricist ryan ross and mentioned that brendon’s attempts to get handsy on stage were not always taken kindly (emphasis mine):

For our first headline tour I would go up to Ryan our guitar player, and like kiss him on the neck or kiss him on the mouth and he would be so mad. I was like, I just want to kiss you bro.

(that’s also the interview where brendon tried to both-sides the issue of roseanne being a hideous fucking racist. so, fun stuff.)

in any case, it took brendon four months to respond to any of the accusations leveled at him and zack. he ended up doing so by filming a two-minute apology on his twitch account (which was locked to subscribers only, meaning it was essentially monetized) [twitter thread summary for those who can't stomach it], only to say that he was just too anxious to say anything and that while zack had been removed from his position, he and brendon would remain close friends. he did not respond to any of the allegations against himself, and proceeded to basically go completely radio silent on all social media until reemerging in 2022 to promote viva las vengeance.

(contrast to this to how speedily he fired touring guitarist kenny harris in 2018 when multiple allegations arose that he was soliciting underage girls. he was removed from the tour in less than twenty-four hours. while the expediency of this was praised at the time, it retroactively raises a lot of questions as to how much brendon and/or zack knew about this behavior beforehand and were simply waiting for a good PR call to do something about it.)

brendon seeing no issues with zack’s behavior and only doing something about it when backed into a corner is very much not a good look, and is suggestive of the possibility that he’s complicit in or at the very least tolerant of this kind of fuckery.

but wait. theres more.

beyond the genuine fucked up behavior, brendon also has a history of severely mistreating his bandmates. we could get into the politics of the infamous schism that split founding member ryan ross (along with bassist jon walker) from brendon and the band’s drummer, spencer smith, but that is its own bag of worms and this post is long enough already. that drama is very well-covered. however, i think it’s worth noting that out of every single member of the band that has come through it, both creative contributor and touring member, the only former member to depart the band amiably was spencer, who took his leave because of struggles with alcoholism. he’s the only one who remains on good terms with brendon to this day, but he’s also technically brendon’s boss at this point since he helps manage the label dcd2, of which panic at the disco is a part.

most apparent and well-documented of brendon’s spotty history with his own bandmates is his treatment of dallon weekes and his wife, breezy weekes, while the former was writing and touring with the band. in that little zack hall clusterfuck above you can see places where breezy talked about being repeatedly harassed but electing to keep quiet so that dallon wouldn't risk losing his job. reportedly they both went to panic's management to put a stop to it, but the bad behavior continued, with both zack hall and brendon’s wife, sarah urie, as propagators. there was public outcry as people insisted that dallon and breezy were making this up for attention. however, eventually former touring guitarist (from 2009-2012) ian crawford (along with his sister), both spoke up to corroborate that zack's behavior (and brendon's enabling of it) were very much recurring issues and were part of the reason that ian left panic in the first place. ian's twitter is no longer active, so all i have are screenshots on tumblr for this one.

dallon has not spoken of his time spent with panic with much fondness. he replaced bassist jon walker in 2009 and contributed creatively on both vices and virtues (2011) and too weird to live, too rare to die (2013). for the former, he was responsible for the concept and album art. for the latter, he got writing credit for all but two of the tracks (casual affair and end of all things), and you can even find an early version of "far too young to die" that was originally penned for one of dallon's earlier projects, the brobecks. the controversial track "girls/girls/boys" (as well as “all the boys”) from too weird was written for dallon's wife, breezy, as a celebration for her pansexuality. the finished product would end up being about an alleged threesome brendon had.

in 2015 dallon stated that he would no longer be involved in panic’s writing process but would continue to serve as touring bassist before departing officially in 2017 and focusing all his efforts on the aforementioned idkhow along with former falling in reverse drummer (and former fellow brobecks bandmate) ryan seaman. while dallon has remained relatively cagey about his time with panic (as is entirely within his rights), he has on occasion commented that he often felt bullied and belittled in the workplace, and once referred to zack hall as "the actual worst person [he had] ever met."

breezy has been more frank about what dallon had to deal with during his time with the band and over time, dallon has been more up front about this as well. turns out dallon was underpaid to the point where he had to take up a second job cleaning carpets while touring with panic, and working side jobs and donating plasma for gas money between tours. this continued well into 2010 and possibly for longer. the ratio was reportedly something like $400 a night compared to brendon's $15k paycheck, so take that as you will.

that's most of what i can remember. i tried to sauce everything i could but please let me know if i missed anything. i also tried to embed the images but doing so kept breaking the damn post cause this is a webbed site so you only get links SORRY

tldr brendon urie is self-absorbed prick who hoards credit, mistreats his musicians, shelters predators, and may very well be a predator himself. fuck him.

also, while i definitely don't want to downplay the severity of just how horrendous a lot of this shit is, in the interests of not wrapping this on a totally down note i do want to mention that people were writing brendon and panic out of the "emo trinity" legacy as early as mid-2019 because everyone hated pray for the wicked that fucking much. after having to endure the musical travesty that is high hopes innumerable times during every single 20-minute grocery store run i was ready to chalk up my dislike of him to sheer annoyance so you can imagine my surprise when i learned that not only was this annoyance justified i wasn't actually hating him nearly enough.

#panic at the disco #brendon urie #yeah whatever ill maintag this just in case people arent aware #also yes you can reblog this as a general rule i never put something on this blog im not ok w people reblogging #have fun go wild whatever but people looking to pick a fight WILL be blocked #i was watching a lot of this going down in real time but there arent a lot of useful consolidations of all this information #and i'd like to stress that this is a fraction of a fraction of whats out there #theres also a lot of discussion on tiktok reportedly?? idk i dont have a tiktok and never will #if anyone feels like adding anything feel free but do please source it #i have had to fight off TOO many intrepid discoursers with a pointy stick to deal with unsauced claims currently #askin hours #anon #SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG also i have been drinking quite a bit at this point hopefully this is all coherent lol

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the-disemvoweler · 2 months

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I want this blog to mostly be lighthearted, but as a trans person, I feel the need to speak about a recent event I've become aware of.

Tw: murder and transphobia

To those unaware, Nex Benedict, a nonbinary student going to Owassa High School in Oklahoma, was violently beaten in a women's bathroom by three other students on February 7th and later died on February 8th. What makes it worse is that staff did not call an ambulance, and Nex had to be brought by their grandmother when they couldn't even go to the nurse's office by themself.

I am so fucking horrified by this. I am disgusted by both the behavior of the people who did this and the school for its gross negligence concerning this event.

I sincerely hope Nex's family is able to find peace and that the people who did this are found out (if they haven't already been) and are brought to justice. This can't stand.

I'm also taking this moment to say that I don't tolerate any kind of transphobic rhetoric on my blog. I haven't had this issue, but I need to make it clear right now where I stand.

Rest in peace, Nex Benedict. I'm sorry that your school failed you.

#the disemvoweler #not disemvoweled #transphobia #death tw #murder tw #hate crime tw #transgender #nex benedict #Nex Benedict #trans #nonbinary

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sebastianthemadlad · 4 months

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Why I don't like the trans woman Vil headcanon

You probably saw my repost of another person talking about this but I wanted to rant about it by myself so here we go.

Before you start calling me transphobic, I'm not angry BECAUSE he's being headcanoned as trans (I actually headcanon him as trans myself, but as a trans man) and at the end of the day he's just a fictional character and it doesn't really matter so do whatever the hell you want.

That being said, a huge part of Vil's characters is not liking gender roles/stereotypes

This scene with him and Epel speaks for itself:

Why is this a problem? Well the main reason I'm seeing a lot of people headcanon him as a trans woman is because he is feminine-

My reaction:

Ah yes because feminine men totally cannot exist! They HAVE to be a trans woman! Same with tomboys they have to be trans men! Oh my god-

I want to clarify I'm not blaming trans people for this, in fact I've seen mainly trans people in the twst wonderland fandom call this out and mainly non trans people headcanon Vil as a trans woman.

To be fair, a lot of trans people started out as masculine "women" or feminine "men" before they realised they were trans, but that doesn't mean ALL feminine and masculine men and women are trans (or at least not transitioning to be the opposite gender I have met plenty of masculine trans women and feminine trans men)

Like the post I reposted said, if Vil truly WERE a trans woman, s/he'd probably be a tomboy, because a huge part of Vil's character IS 👏🏻BREAKING 👏🏻GENDER 👏🏻ROLES!

A lot of the trans male friends I have who also like Twisted Wonderland look up to Vil, because they want to break male gender roles and pass enough to be seen as a feminine guy and not a woman (what I mean by that is when trans men are feminine and like wearing dresses and stuff they are often a bit too afraid to do it due to social dysphoria and being misgendered so they usually wait until they begin passing more to wear/do more feminine things, its sad)

So when said trans male friends see the other twisted wonderland say Vil HAS TO BE A WOMAN just because he's feminine it makes them upset, they think they aren't "trans enough" and that to be a "true man" they must conform to male gender roles so they can be "trans enough"

The same goes with female characters who are masculine, trans women who are tomboys could be happy that a woman in media they watch is more masculine like them, but when people start headcanoning said woman as a trans man, it could make the trans women upset

I'm not saying headcanoning certain characters as trans is a bad thing, do whatever the hell you want, I'm not the type to get angry over fictional fun, I scoff at people wishing death upon proshippers because yeah its gross but at the end of the day its just fiction and the person behind it are often just a weird pre teen, I barely even make "call out posts" about these types of fandom stuff but subjects like being transgender often hit home for me because I have many trans friends and a few trans relatives whom I worry about because I know dysphoria can often make people think unhealthy and suicidal thoughts, so I'm just concerned about the harm certain headcanons could cause

#twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland book 5 #twst #vil schoenheit #pomefiore #trans #transgender #trans women #trans men #trans headcanons #rant #gender roles #gender stereotypes #feminine men #headcanons

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