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#and i was like “yeah actually!” because no adult had ever asked me about it before and i was so happy to like be recognized as a person
thenamessparkplug · 3 months
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shoutout to my old 4th grade teacher for being more supportive of me one time 6 months ago than my own mother's ever been< 3333
#it was like such a tiny interaction but i also never forgot#it was during some kind of family party thing for kids parents (and siblings) to come and eat pizza and some other stuff i dont remember#and anyways my brother(who currently goes to this school) wanted to go so my whole family went#and while i was there my mom saw my old 4th grade teacher and was like “omg you should go talk to her”#and i was like yeah i should she was a really cool lady actually#so i nervously was like “hi” and didnt think shed recognize me at all#but she IMMEDIETLY was like “ITS YOU! /pos”#she then points to my shirt and asks me “hey are those your pronouns now?”#and this was back when i still wore pronoun/pride pins in general#and i was like “yeah actually!” because no adult had ever asked me about it before and i was so happy to like be recognized as a person#and she gave me a hug and told me she was proud of me and how much id grown and i /maybe/ got a little close to tears but ignore that#and my mom just stood there the whole time#she didnt say anything#she didnt smile#and this was not my first time wearing my pronoun pin my TRANS FLAG pin even#never once did she acknowledge it#also like a month later she made fun of me for it and i havent worn one since#uh yeah anyways#sorry for ranting lmao#or ig venting?? this was not my intention mb mb#trans#transgender#lgbt#lgtbq#lgbtqia#(to be clear my mom has made it very clear she will never support me on numerous occasions it wasnt like a one time thing lmao)#tw vent??#tw vent
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pepprs · 8 months
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i cannot express enough how damaging it is mentally and emotionally that i still live here 🤣
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postmodernlover · 1 year
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inkskinned · 2 years
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kids remind me, often, of the things i've taught myself out of.
i have a big dog. he looks like a deer. he is taller than most young children. while we were on a trail the other day, a boy coming our direction saw us and froze. he took a step back and said: "i'm feeling nervous. your - your dog is kind of big."
goblin and i both stopped walking immediately. "he is kind of a big dog," i admitted. "he's called a greyhound. they are gentle but they are pretty tall, which is kind of scary, you're right. their legs are so long because they are made for running fast. i am sorry we scared you. would you like us to stand still while you move past us, or would you feel more safe in your body if we move and you stay still?'
"oh. i didn't know that about - greyhounds. i think i ... i want to stay still," he said. at this point, his adult had caught up to us. "i'm nervous about the dog," he told her, "so i'm - i'm gonna stay still." she didn't argue. she didn't make fun of him. she just smiled at him and at me and held his hand while goblin and i, with as wide of a berth as we could make, crept our way through.
behind us, i heard him exhale a deep breath and kind of laugh - "he was really big, huh? she said it's because greyhounds have to go fast."
"he was big," she said. "i understand why that could have made you a little scared."
"yeah. next time i - next time do you think i could maybe ask to touch him? when - i mean, next time, maybe, if i'm not nervous."
later, going to a work event, in the big city, i stood outside, trembling. my social anxiety as a caught bird in my chest. i took a deep breath and turned to my coworker. she's not even really my friend yet. i told her: "i feel nervous about this. i am not used to meeting new people, ever since covid."
she laughed, but not in a mean way. she said she was nervous too. she reached her hand out and held mine, and we both took another deep breath and walked in like that, interlinked. a few people asked us - together? - and i told the truth: i feel nervous, and she's helping. over and over i watched people relax too, admitting i feel really kind of shy lately actually, thank you for saying that.
the next time i go to an event, and i feel a little scared, i ask right away: wanna hold hands? this feels a little dangerous. i hesitate less. i don't hide it as much. i watch for other people who are also nervous and say - it's kinda hard, huh?
i know, logically, i'm not good at asking for help. but i am also not good at noticing when i need help. i've trained myself out of asking completely, but i've also trained myself to never accept my own fears or excuses. i have trained myself to tamp down every anxiety and just-push-through. i don't know what i'm protecting myself from - just that i never think to admit it to anyone.
but every person on earth occasionally needs comfort. every person on earth occasionally needs connection. many of us were taught independence is the same thing as never needing anything.
each of us should have had an adult who heard - i feel nervous and held our hand and asked us how we could be helped to feel safe. no judgement, and no chiding. many of us did not. many of us were punished for the ways that we seemed "weak".
but here is something: i am an adult now. and i get nervous a lot, actually. and if you are an adult and you are feeling a little nervous - come talk to me. we can hold hands and figure out what will help us feel safe in our bodies. and maybe, next time, if we're brave, we can pet the dog that's passing.
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sadhours · 3 months
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You’re so talented and amazing that smut has me SWEATING!!!!
Plsssss part two with Steve taking readers virginity I beg
stop I love you!
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
cw: 18+ minors dni, smut, inexperienced reader, oral (f and m receiving), virginity loss, p in v, unprotected (sorry I can’t write any other way)
part one
requests are open!!
shockingly, when you went to Steve’s house that night, you two didn’t sleep together. Which was his idea. He said he felt like maybe you two oughta get to know each other better before you went that far. You were visibly upset by that but Steve insisted it would be better that way.
So that’s how you find yourself a couple weeks later, holding hands with him as you walk through the mall. If you didn’t know any better, you’d swear you were dating but Steve didn’t ask you to be his girlfriend. But you two have been spending almost every day together, after work and on your days off. Like today, the pair of you have the day off but you wind up at the mall anyway. He called you this morning and asked if you wanted to hang out. To which you told Steve you needed to get a new pair of shoes for work, since yours were falling apart and he offered to tag along. He even picked you up.
You make eye contact with your coworkers as the pair of you stroll passed the food court. They make crude hand gestures and so you squeeze Steve’s hand and walk faster. He’s none the wiser, eyes scanning around the crowded mall. You catch yourself staring at him. You’ve had this like, really intense feeling in your chest ever since you and Steve started hanging out. It’s tight, almost like your lungs don’t have enough air. And he’s literally all you think about, all you can talk about. Steve, Steve, Steve. On a loop, to a nauseating extent. Not nauseating to you, but most likely to your family and friends. But really, he’s so dreamy.
“Where do you usually get your work shoes?” Steve asks, grazing his thumb against the back of your hand.
“Sears,” you answer honestly. Steve’s parents are in a vastly different tax bracket than your own so you get a little self conscious about these kinds of things. You were incredibly impressed with his house. And it took a good convincing from him to let him come over to yours. Especially because while Steve’s parents weren’t home when you went over there, yours were at yours always. And they were embarrassing, even though you were an adult now, they hovered. And you couldn’t close your door when he came over. Your mom about talked his ears off, too but Steve was charming and when he left, your mom told you he was sweet and she liked him.
“Cool,” he nods, “What do you wanna do after this?”
You shrug, walking into the entrance of Sears, “I don’t know.”
“We can use my pool,” he offers, “It’s really nice out, today.”
You blush, the thought of being in your swimsuit in front of Steve is kind of a lot. Even though you two have messed around, you’ve been almost completely dressed each time. Really, you’ve just been doing the same thing— dry humping but Steve always pulls your tits out. He actually stares at them sometimes, gets this look on his face that makes you feel like a million bucks. His eyes get all glassy and he looks dazed as he watches them bounce with your movements. It makes you feel sexy and you’ve never felt that way in your life. But being so exposed in broad daylight is rather intimidating.
“Yeah, maybe,” you reply shyly, cheeks ruddy at the thought of him seeing your body. “We’d have to go get my swimsuit, though.”
“We’re at a mall,” Steve chuckles, “You can just buy one.”
Well, you didn’t anticipate spending too much today. But again, you’re embarrassed so you won’t say that. You just shrug, “If I can find one.”
“I can help,” he grins, eyebrows raising as he nudges his side against you. Which just makes your face ten times more flushed. “Oh, look!” Steve points to the section of the store lined with swimsuits, “Perfect.”
The pair of you head that way. Steve motions at a red bikini, which is not something you’d usually wear. You’re a one piece kind of girl. But now that you’re thinking about it, the swim suit you have at home isn’t exactly sexy. And really, you want Steve to look at you with that dreamy look in his eyes again.
“That one’s nice,” he says, “And my trunks are red, so we’ll match.”
You pick up the top, looking it over when you realize you have no idea how to tell your size. You’re gonna have to try it on. “I need to try it on,” you tell Steve and grab a few sizes before making your way to the dressing rooms, Steve right behind you.
Much to Steve’s dismay, you don’t show him the bikini but you get the right size and get your pair of shoes. Steve buys you a smoothie on the way out. But what he does on the ride to his house is really what gets you. As he’s driving, he reaches his hand over and rests it on your thigh. His palm against your bare thigh makes them all tingly and you feel like the car is suddenly really hot, so you roll down the window. Looking out because you’re too shy to look at him. Steve squeezes your thigh and you clear your throat, shifting in your seat.
“You alright?” he asks, turning to you briefly.
“I’m fine,” you choke out as you look at him.
“Is this okay?” he squeezes your thigh again.
You swallow the lump rising in your throat and nod your head yes, “Yeah, it feels nice.”
“Good,” he smiles, his eyes crinkling with it and he’s the prettiest boy you’ve ever seen.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
You’re really nervous, fixing your hair as you look in the mirror. You wished Steve gave you a towel to cover up with before you changed because now you have to make an entrance… in this bikini that feels like it barely covers anything. You swear one wrong move and your boobs gonna fly right out. But you think, Steve won’t mind that.
His face confirms it when you finally walk out onto the back patio, seeing Steve laying towels out on the pool loungers. He drops the towel in his hand and his lips part, holding his hand above his brows to shield the sun as he gawks at you. And thankfully, his reaction gives you a breath of confidence and you strut over to him, “Not too bad, huh?”
“Fucking unbelievable,” he breathes through a satisfied smile, “You look amazing.” His hand comes to rest on the back of your waist, dipping his face down to kiss your cheek.
“Steve!” you flush, bringing your hands up to your face. He grabs your wrists and kisses all over face, repeating that you look great over and over. You erupt in giggles, grabbing his hands and pull back.
“What? Too much?” he asks, looking down at you with those gorgeous puppy dog eyes.
“I think… you need to cool off,” you say slyly before shoving him into the pool, jumping in right after him. Steve’s laughing when he comes up from the water, swimming over to you and wrapping his arms around your waist.
“Good one,” he muses, looking fond, “Very clever.”
“I’m glad you thought so,” you giggle, wrapping your arms around his neck. He kisses you then, and immediately you melt. Kissing Steve is like otherworldly. It’s like everything around you disappears and it’s just you two. His lips are soft yet firm, kissing you determinedly. His hands are big, cascading up and down your sides.
But then he pulls away and smiles, “Wanna race? I bet I can swim from this end to the other faster than you.”
“You’re on,” you bet and start swimming to the edge of the pool.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
After you two get out of the pool, your body is all tingly and needy. You dry off and can’t keep your eyes off of Steve’s body as he dries off. Eyes scanning over the constellations of moles scattering over his chest, arms and back. He catches you, biting is lip as he’s drying his hair.
“Steve?”
“Yeah?”
“I think… I want…” you take a deep breath as your face flushes.
“What is it? You okay?” he asks, tilting his head as he gets a look of concern in his eyes.
“I think I’m ready,” you tell him, “ya know.. to do it.”
“Really?” he drops his towel, looking surprised.
“Uh huh,” you nod as you smile, so sure of yourself.
He grabs your hand and practically pulls you up to his bedroom. You fall back on his mattress and he’s crawling up between your legs, palm meeting your cheek gently as he crashes his lips into yours. It’s different than kisses before. Steve seems more urgent, more needy. His hands feel you everywhere, squeezing and pulling wherever he can. It’s intoxicating and makes your stomach twist, full of desire. You wrap your legs around his waist, pulling him even closer and you can feel his cock strained behind his swim trunks rubbing against your core. It’s familiar, but a bit more charged. There’s more coming and it has your back arching. Steve breaks the kiss, “You’re sure?”
“Yes,” you nod, writhing against him, “I’m sure.”
“Cool,” he breathes, moving his fingers to untie your bikini top and he pulls it off. His lips find your jaw, leaving sloppy open mouthed kisses wherever they can. Down your neck and over the curve of your breasts, then you feel his tongue against your perked nipple and you whine, knitting your fingers in his damp hair.
He flicks his tongue against it, looking up at your face as he broadly licks it before sucking it between his lips. You gasp, tilting your head back as you try to grind against him harder. You’re desperate for more friction there. Steve moans against your supple skin, and then his lips work lower. Down your stomach. And you no longer have his erection to grind against but his fingers dip into the waistband of your bottoms. Your breath catches in your throat, looking down at him in anticipation. He looks so pretty, the sunlight shining through the half closed curtains in his bedroom and casting beautifully on his strong eyebrows and sharp nose.
Steve peels your bottoms down your thighs and you move your legs to help him, hands moving to cover your chest. Otherwise, completely exposed to him. Steve kisses your hipbone, spreading your legs with his hands and then moves his mouth between them. Starts with kissing your thighs, but when he actually gets his mouth on your pussy, you cry out. It’s pleasure in a way you’ve never felt and it’s white hot, feel it everywhere. He licks through your folds, humming softly as he does so. It’s so warm and wet and lovely. Uses his plump lips when he does it, grazing against your folds. And he puts his mouth completely on you, sucks on your folds and his thumb lowers down to your hole, rubbing teasing circles around it and you gasp out. Eyes closing involuntarily as you tilt your head back, focused solely on how incredible this feels.
It’s almost pathetic how quickly he makes you cum, your cry breaks off as it leaves your lips and your thighs squeeze his head while you ride it out. Steve watches you with a look of shock on his face, flattery, really. Impressed with himself at quick he made that happen. Smoothes his palms along the soft skin of your legs as he forces them open, coming up for air. His cheeks are flushed, a pretty pink blooming over them and the tip of his nose.
“Christ,” he exhales, fingers digging into the fat of your thighs as he beams up at you. “You okay, princess?”
Your chest heaves while you come down, eyes blinking open as you let out a sigh. The pet name makes your chest tighten, you want Steve to say it again, over and over. “So okay,” you gasp out as you sit up and look down at him.
He smiles cheekily, nudging his nose against your shaking thighs as he blinks up at you, “You’re sensitive, huh?”
“Nobody’s ever done that to me,” you admit, tucking your hair behind your ear as you flush.
He chuckles softly, keeps nuzzling against your thigh as he smoothes his palms down your calves. “You sure you wanna keep going?”
You nod enthusiastically at him, “W-wanna make you feel good.”
Steve pushes you on your back, gets himself on top of you and places a chaste kiss against your lips, mumbles against them, “That made me feel really good.”
Your hands find his hair, carding in the locks as you kiss his words and roll your hips up to meet him, “I wanna keep going. Maybe I can try.. returning the favor.”
The boy grunts softly into your mouth, the corners of his lips hitching up, “You ever done that before?”
“No,” you pout, feeling a little self conscious but more than that, eager. “I’m a really fast learner, though.”
“I’m.. I,” Steve laughs, breath hot against your mouth, “Might need a break after, but… hell, we’ve got all night.”
“A break?” you ask curiously and Steve nods against you, foreheads bumping together. He cups your cheek, kisses you tenderly.
“Mhm, can’t go again as quick,” he mumbles into your lips, grounds his hips down and you can feel him through his swim trunks. Hard and firm against your sensitive cunt.
You pull him back slightly, looking up at him tenderly as you say, “I really wanna try.”
He laughs again, breathless and it’s not mean, it makes your heart warm. The sound of him. Pretty and sweet. Makes you that much eager to please; to impress.
Steve rolls onto his back, inches up against his pillows and looks at you, eyes dark despite the fond smile spreading on his face. You sit beside him and your fingers find the elastic of his shorts, inching inside and looking up at him for guidance. He nods, short and soft. You pull down his damp trunks and his cock bounces out, long and thick against his abdomen. He helps rid of the shorts completely, kicking them off his ankles and then he rakes his fingers through your hair. Tilts his head as he looks down at you and says, “Just do what feels natural, princess.”
Your cheeks heat at the name, blooming down your neck and chest. Curious fingers graze down his length, Steve breathes out a pretty sound— almost a whine, kind of a sigh. Then you wrap your fingers around him, biting your lip at the warmth and weight. He inhales sharply, nodding at you as you lean forward and press your lips to the tip. Experimentally, you lick against the head of his cock and then drag your tongue across the edge of it. Steve groans, keeps stroking your cheek and forehead as he watches you with pupils blown wide.
“That’s it, baby,” he breathes out, “doing so good already.”
You’ve still got your fingers circled around his shaft, holding his cock up as you lick the tip like an ice cream cone. But you know you’re supposed to suck, that’s what you’ve been told at least. So you wrap your lips around the head and do just that. It punches a pretty sound from Steve’s throat, distinctly a whine. So you do it again and again and Steve keeps making that sound over and over before he says, “Move your hand, princess. Slow, up and down.”
Head feeling all dizzy, you listen and slowly stroke his cock up and down. But it’s kinda awkward— dry. You think it would work smoother if your palm was wet so you pull away and lick your hand before returning it to Steve’s cock, and you were right, the movement is so much easier like this and Steve moans, eyes blinking rapidly as he watches you.
“Such a fast learner, good girl,” he pants out and you’re smiling, cheeks swelling before you take his tip back between your lips.
You like this— a lot. Grinding down against the mattress for some friction, thighs all hot and slick with arousal. It’s the way he reacts, the sounds he makes and the way his face contorts in pleasure. Steve was pretty before but he looks even prettier like this. He bites at his lower lip, makes it even pinker and plumper. You sink a little more of him into your mouth, careful with your teeth as you swirl your tongue around his swollen tip and then suck. Your jaw aches slightly but it’s so worth it. Steve’s fingers slide into the roots of your hair, gripping softly as he moans out little encouragements.
“So pretty, so pretty like this.”
And it’s kind of silly because you think he looks so pretty like this. You squeeze his shaft a little tighter as you stroke him, out of pure excitement and Steve groans, guttural and low as he swears, “Fuuuuck.”
You suck harder on his tip and continue moving your fingers up and down his length, curving your palm on each upstroke because Steve’s eyes roll back slightly and you want more of that.
“Just like that— holy—- fuckfuckfuck,” Steve pants and moans, “I’m gonna cum.”
Out of pure curiosity, you don’t pull off. Because also, when you came, Steve didn’t pull away. He makes a choked, broken sound and releases, hot and thick on your tongue. And you’d heard all your coworkers complain about the taste but Steve is sweet, not bitter like you’ve been told. You don’t hate the taste at all, though the texture is another story. But you swallow it down all the same and Steve’s watching and gasping for air as you pull away. He grabs hold of your face, pulls you close and then wraps his arms around your body, kissing you fiercely, bruisingly.
❤️❤️❤️❤️
It happens later. Steve’s parents away on yet another business trip, a white lie told to yours about staying the night at a friends and there you are. On his couch. Steve laid on his back, you nestled between his thighs with your cheek on his chest and his legs tangled with you. He plays with your hair as the TV plays late night informercials. You’re not paying attention, mind wandering as you subtly take in the smell of Steve. Musk and summer, his honey scented shampoo and the sugary candy you two shared on his breath. Fans your face hotly and lovely. Tickles against the ridge of your brows, cascades down to your nostrils and it’s rather intoxicating. Ushers you to lift your face and inch up his body, wanting to taste as you brush your lips against his. His hand snakes down your spine, onto the soft skin at the small of your back, your shirt pulled up just slightly. Steve kisses you back tenderly, sighing so softly you almost miss it.
A thought tugs at the back of your head and you ask against his lips, “What are we?”
Steve hums, eyebrow raising as he smiles, “What do you mean?”
“Like… we spend every day together, we kiss, we… do other stuff,” you swallow hard, chest tightening with fear as you repeat, “So what are we?”
He nudges his nose against yours, “What do you wanna be, princess?”
“Yours,” you admit, a whisper. Almost silent.
“You are mine,” Steve replies, squeezing your hip in his hand. You flush something mad, trying to surprise the giggle of excitement from bubbling out of your throat. It’s fruitless, the sound erupting from you as your cheeks swell. Steve kisses you again, softly and asks against your lips, “You wanna be my girlfriend, princess?”
You nod as you kiss back, “Mhm.”
“Then you’re my girlfriend,” Steve agrees easily, his breath smells so sweet, makes your head all fuzzy.
“And you’re my boyfriend?” you test, hand moving up to cup his jaw.
“You better believe it,” he mumbles, you can hear the smile but even better you can feel it against your lips. You kiss him again, more intent behind it this time— fingernails softly scratching at his jaw. Steve drags his tongue along your bottom lip, asking to deepen the kiss which you eagerly agree as you part your lips. He tastes like candy, tooth achingly sweet when you welcome his skilled tongue against your own. It heats up quick, your hips dancing together as the pair of you pant into each others mouths. Steve’s hands lower to the fat of your ass, kneading and pulling. Your thighs feel all tingly, core aching with desperation for him.
You’re determined, you’ve been wanting Steve in that way for so long it feels like and he’s been taking his time with you. Testing the waters when you would’ve handed it over to him that first night in Scoops Ahoy!
“Stevie,” you pant against his mouth, “need you.”
“You have me, princess,” he retorts, smiling sweetly as he uses his leverage on your ass to grind you down against him. You can feel his length, hard and firm against your core and you whimper, needy.
“Need you— Steve, want you so bad,” you babble into his mouth as you writhe against him.
He taps your bum, “Up. Bedroom.”
You obey, don’t have to be told twice, holding his hand as he leads you to his bedroom. He kisses you once you’re inside, guides you backwards until the backs of your knees hit the mattress and you fall into it, pulling Steve with you, refusing to pull your lips away from his. Which is a feat when you two start undressing one another. When you do have to pull away to rid of articles, you whine and Steve chuckles, gives you what you want seconds later. Smoothes his hands down your naked body as he licks into your mouth. He pulls back, on his knees between your legs as he licks the tips of his fingers and brings them to your core, exhaling sharply once he’s met with the evidence of just how much you need him.
This is it, you think. As he licks his fingers again and smears the saliva over his aching tip, guiding it towards your entrance and you whine out, just when skin meets skin. Readier than ever, overwhelmingly desperate to feel Steve inside you. Your back arches as he sinks in, just the tip of him stretching you open. It’s pleasure incarnate, radiates through your stomach and eats at all your nerves.
“More,” you plead, grabbing onto his biceps as you roll your hips. Steve sinks in deeper and it’s a little intense, searing and hot and also so, so, so perfect. Pulls a high pitched moan from you. Steve’s rubbing soothing circles against your stomach.
“Tell me if it’s too much, yeah?”
You nod, digging your nails into his skin. Making little crescent indents. He lowers his mouth to yours, grazing your lips together as he sheathes his cock deeper inside. You gasp out, eyes clenching tightly at the burn. Steve kisses you through it, whispers words of encouragement there. Princess this and princess that. Pushes through this barrier and it’s all white hot pleasure. Bright light behind your eyelids as you moan out appreciation, adoration, desperation. His hips still, giving you the opportunity to adjust. Kisses you stupid with sugary sweetness. Tastes just like candy. Your hands are all over him, chest, stomach, shoulders, neck and back. Crying out soft little praising sounds.
He grits his teeth, eyebrows tangled as he pleads, “Please— princess, can I move?”
“Please,” you beg, “Gimme…” the thoughts lost as Steve winds his hips back and pushes them back down into you. A moan interrupting, voice wrecked already and Steve swallows it, kisses it away as he rolls his hips steadily. Keeps this rhythm that has your eyes rolling back and steady, candied uh-uh-uh’s fall from your lips.
Steve’s left hand holds himself up, palm to the mattress while his right grips tightly at your hip. Your legs open, ankles hooking over the backs of his thighs and your hands are still everywhere, taking in whatever you can. The way he’s stretching you out and filling you up at the same time is intoxicating, euphoria dripping all over you. You’re almost mad that you’d waited so long but it’s all too perfect. And maybe Steve’s been right and waiting is what made this moment the best thing you’ve ever experienced.
His lips are brutal against yours, pushing and pulling. Desperate and hungry. These pretty grunts and moans mushing against your lips.
“Steve,” you whine out, “god…”
He moves to grab your jaw, tilting your head back into the pillows as he moves his hips quicker, harder. Makes your head spin, the coil in your stomach winding tighter and tighter. All you can really do is lay back and take it, mind gone all numb. Your hips search his out, rocking back into him with every thrust. The tip of his cock reaching something fierce and overwhelming inside you. Brushes against this spot so wonderfully that tears prick your eyes, threatening to spill over onto your cheeks.
“So perfect for me,” he mumbles into your mouth, “so pretty, so fuck— fucking gorgeous, princess.”
This wave rushes up on you like nothing before, punches the breath out of your lungs as you grip onto his back, nails scratching down the mole specked skin and Steve groans roughly against your mouth. Your eyes are open but you’re blinded by stars, exploding like fireworks as your eyebrows furrow and you emit a sound so loud, bordering on a cry. It’s like the drop of a roller coaster but a million times more intense, you’re not on this earth for the seconds it happens. Legs wrapping around his waist, crying out during the aftershocks of it. Steve’s panting against your lips, little whines and moans. Pretty sounds that just elongate the utter ecstasy ripping through your body.
“Fuckfuck— shit, princess, I’m gonna—“ Steve pulls out of you abruptly, fingers gripping around his cock as he spills over onto your stomach. Makes a choked and broken sound as he does it, your eyes are on his face. Watching the pleasure contort his features in a way that has you obsessed. He pants, chest heaving as he pushes his hair back. Catches his breath, leans down and kisses you softly before exiting the bed. You whine in protest, reaching your hands out for him.
Steve smiles sweetly at you, grabs a dirty towel from his hamper and moves to wipe his cock. You watch in awe, still coming back down to earth. He moves back towards the bed, using the towel to clean off your stomach. He drops it to the floor and curls up next you, pulling your face to his and kisses you stupid.
“Worth the wait?” he asks, teasingly.
You giggle and say against his lips, “When can we do it again?”
He laughs, pulling your body flush to his as he says, “You’re gonna kill me, princess.”
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livwritesstuff · 27 days
Text
Steve’s oldest daughter Moe is unusually quiet on the drive home from her college apartment in New York City.
She was supposed to be doing this drive with her younger sister Robbie (who had bullied Steve and Eddie into letting her bring a car with her to college), but then Robbie and her friends had actually managed to squirrel away enough money for an impromptu trip to D.C. for their spring break, and Moe had still wanted to visit home even without a ride.
Steve had made a whole show acting all put out over having to make the four hour drive between her school in NYC and their house in the Massachusetts suburbs (twice, he’ll add — he’s been on the road for six hours so far with a couple more to go) but, truthfully, there isn’t much he wouldn’t do to spend time with his kids, especially since the older two have firmly graduated to young-adult status, and he easily could have put her on a train.
“So what’s goin’ on with you, Moe?” he finally asks when the quiet stretches a little to far.
Moe shrugs, and then she says, “I was wondering something.”
“Go for it.”
“You and Dad, like…you were older when you started dating, right?”
Steve pauses for a moment, allowing himself to consider what might qualify as older to his twenty-one-year-old daughter. 
“I guess it depends on what you mean by older,” he settles on telling her.
“I mean, you weren’t in high school anymore, even though you knew each other in high school.”
“Yeah,” Steve nods, “I was halfway through grad school, so twenty-six, I think, and you know Dad’s not even a year older than me.”
Moe nods in return, and  then she asks, “And you were friends before anything else happened? Like, for a while?”
“Uh-huh,” Steve replies, “Dad, and Aunt Nancy, and Aunt Robin were my best friends. Still are, obviously, just…different over time.”
“But, like, how–” Moe stops, and Steve can tell without needing to look away from the road to check the way her eyebrows are furrowed, the way they’re crinkled in the middle just like they always are on the rare occasions Moe can’t find the words she needs. She lets out a short exhale, “How did you know that it changed?” Before Steve can answer, Moe shakes her head, “How did you know that what you were feeling wasn’t, like, friend things anymore? Or, like, that it was more than just friend things.”
“Uh,” Steve pauses, running a hand through his hair, “Honestly, Nancy kind of told me.”
Moe’s head turns in his direction.
“Aunt Nancy told you?” she asks, “Pop…that’s so lame.”
“Yeah, well, that’s what happened.”
“Why?”
Steve thinks about it for a second. It’s funny, he doesn’t actually put too much thought into that time in his life – the seven years that had lapsed between becoming friends with Eddie in the aftermath of everything with the Upside Down and when they’d finally gotten together. That was nearly thirty years ago, after all, and Steve hasn’t ever really been the type to dwell on the past. He takes a moment to dwell on it now and remembers how long it had taken him to notice the dull ache behind his ribs and the anxious somersault his stomach had done every time Eddie so much as looked his way.
“I mean – yeah, you’re right. It’s…it’s not easy when you’re close with someone for a long time and then the way you feel about them changes, because, you know, it’s not – I mean, it’s not like it changes overnight. It’s gradual, so…yeah, it’s not easy.”
“Yeah,” she quietly agrees.
“Nance, just – well, you know Nance. She just clocked it before I did, and I guess she didn’t have the patience to wait it out. Once I knew though, it was, like, super fucking obvious. I couldn’t believe I hadn’t known before.”
Moe’s laugh is nervous in a way Steve isn’t sure he’s ever heard before, and if there’s a friend of Moe’s she might be feeling differently for, he thinks he might have an idea which one. Moe is a hell of a lot smarter than him though, and this conversation is telling enough that she won’t need things spelled out for her in the way he had with Eddie thirty years ago.
“It was hard,” he continues, because he has a feeling Moe might need to hear more even if she isn’t asking for anything specific, “I – I mean, I actually liked dating when I was your age, believe it or not. I thought it was fun, or whatever, and it wasn’t really a thing that made me nervous, you know? With your dad, though…shit, I was terrified, because it’s a different kind of risk than just shooting your shot with someone you run into and hit it off with.”
Moe nods.
“I think the reason it’s so freaky is because falling for someone you’re friends with is never just a crush. I knew there was something big there. I know you guys hate when Dad and I are all sappy, but he was never just some guy I was dating. He was it for me from the very beginning.”
Moe mumbles something under her breath that Steve doesn’t quite catch.
“What was that?”
“I don’t hate it,” she says, her voice still pretty low, and Steve knows that must have been difficult for her to admit so he doesn’t comment on it (though he will be telling Eddie as soon as he possibly can – obviously).
“Well, I’m just saying,” he replies, “I wasn’t feeling that way for nothing, and things turned out pretty good in the end. If someone was in a similar situation, I’d tell them…” he pauses, and then laughs as he says, “I’d tell them to not wait seven years to get a good thing started.”
“Alright,” she replies, “I’ll…yeah, I’ll keep that in mind.”
476 notes · View notes
trensu · 11 months
Text
It's Will that gives him the idea.
"we don't really celebrate father's day anymore," he had said awkwardly, "but I can't hang out anyway."
"why not?" Dustin demanded. He was gonna end up bored and alone because he didn't celebrate the holiday and everyone else had plans. he had been counting on Will to keep him company.
"I'm gonna get Jonathan a new record and I want to listen to it with him," he said.
"can't he get his own records? C'mon, we could go to the arcade or something."
"no, Dustin," his tone took on a stubborn edge that made Dustin pause. "He's my brother and I love him, and he's the only guy besides Bob who's ever even tried to look out for me. So I'm sorry but I'm gonna be busy on Sunday."
Dustin didn't argue after that but it did get him thinking which is why on Sunday morning he biked all the way over to Loch Nora and started banging on Steve's door.
"what do you want, Henderson?" Steve sighed the most dramatic put upon sigh Dustin had ever heard.
"you're not my dad--"
"wow you really are genius!"
"shut up, shut up, listen to me!"
"okay, geez, I'm listening."
"you're not my dad and I don't want you to be my dad. I don't even really want a dad! Lots of dads aren't even that great and my mom already has the single parent thing down. But you taught me how to do my hair and how to talk to girls - even though that advice sucked, I didn't need it to get Suzie at all - and you're gonna teach me how to drive--"
"woah, hey, no I never said I'd do that, wh--"
"--and you've saved my life but I think we're even because I've saved your life too."
"Henderson don't you have anything better to do than harass me in my own home?" Steve said. he was using that exasperated tone he got when he knew he wasn't keeping up with what was going on but didn't want to admit it.
"actually no I don't but I'm here for a reason," he reached into his backpack and took out the gift he clumsily wrapped with scraps of brown paper bags. He shoved it into Steve's hands. "You're basically the only adult male figure in my life. And I appreciate you."
Steve squinted at the gift and then at Dustin and at the gift again before he said fussily "is this a prank? If something gross explodes from this, I swear to god, I'll--"
"Just open it, Steve!"
"Fine, fine, keep your shirt on," Steve said and tore off the paper. He blinked and in a softer tone said, "Oh."
"I don't know if you even like making models but I know you love cars and this kit looked just like yours, so yeah."
Steve stared at the kit some more. Dustin started to fidget. It was always better to be honest with your feelings but maybe this was too much for Steve. Maybe Steve didn't like him as much as Dustin did. Steve was not as enlightened about these things as Dustin.
"I've never made a model before."
Dustin hunched his shoulders and tried not to feel stupid or hurt. He should have expected this. They weren't even related. This was probably too weird. He reached out to take the gift back.
"it's fine, I can return it, whatever."
Steve raised the kit out of Dustin's reach.
"Hey, this is mine," he said.
"you don't even like it!"
"I never said that! I'm just gonna need a dweeby little nerd to help me build it. You know anybody like that?" Steve asked, batting his eyes innocently.
"you're such a dick," Dustin grumbled, fighting back a grin.
"watch your language!"
"shut up, you're not my dad."
Steve laughed as Dustin shoved his way into the house. Hours later, after much shouting and ribbing and one incident of spilled paint, a small model of the beemer was left to dry while Steve forced Dustin to watch the baseball game on TV with him. It wasn't the worst thing ever, and after Steve mentioned the statistics involved, it got way more interesting ("of course you'd like the math part, you weirdo" "you don't understand the stats do you" "shut up and watch the game, Henderson"). When the paint was dry, Dustin followed Steve upstairs and watched him carefully and deliberately place the model between a couple of sports trophies.
"yeah, I guess it looks pretty cool," Steve said with exaggerated nonchalance. "Now beat it, kid. your mom's gonna freak if you're not home when she gets back from work."
"can you give me a ride?"
"ugh, fine."
Dustin grinned. This had been, hands down, the best father's day ever. From the look on Steve's face when he placed the model, Dustin was pretty sure he agreed.
1K notes · View notes
squirmhoney · 6 months
Text
TWISTED | PART ONE
Pairing: Rafe Cameron x Reader Warning: Smut. Dark. Non-Con. Dub-con. Abusive relationship. Pet names. Possessive!Rafe 18+ MDNI A/N: This is inspired by my drabble here. Hope you enjoy it and please read the warnings before proceeding. Support me through my Ko-Fi linked here.
Part two
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Master List Here
Ever since you were three, you had struggled with social situations. Which made starting school awful…
But only for a second. 
Because he was there. That taller boy with light blonde hair and  a goofy smile, who had practically been your guiding light through your whole first day and the day after that, and after that… 
You thought he’d be there till the end but the month after Rafe turned sixteen he started on the cruel path he had always been destined for. Or at least, that’s what you liked to believe. Because truth be told, most of the Outer Banks believed Rafe had always had a cruelness to him, you had just been the last person to see it. 
On your twenty-first birthday, Rafe had been the last person on your mind. 
Especially when your mother was in the midst of talking you through what was supposed to be your ‘surprise birthday party’.  
“You only turn twenty-one once,” your mother exclaimed, holding out another dress for you to look at. 
You grimaced at the option, turning away from her to finger through another rack of dresses. 
“Who knows when I’ll be able to celebrate your birthday again?” She whined, face dropping to convince you to let her hold this one party. “Especially with you planning to leave the Outer Banks in a few months.” 
“It’s not like I’m never going to visit,” you told her.
“You’re finally an adult, Y/N.”  
This made you roll your eyes. 
“Let me do this one thing for you, please.” 
She was insisting and you knew there was only one person that could ever win in this situation. 
You nodded, mouthing a small okay before turning away to find a dress to suit the occasion. But you could still hear her screeches of excitement from behind you, reminding you that you’d be her perfect doll to show off to the whole Kook population tonight. 
It was only an hour into shopping when you finally grew tired, wanting to call it a day and go home. But without the dress your mother believed you needed, you weren’t going anywhere. 
“How about this?” Your mother pulled out yet another gown from the clothing racks. 
“It’s too much,” you answered, rolling your eyes as you took another step further into the shop. 
You could sense the lecture brewing from your mother, hearing it in her tone as her mouth snapped open. But you were quick to shut it out, focusing on the distant noise of laughter coming from behind the dressing room curtains, a laughter you recognised. 
When a head of brown and another one of blonde stepped out of the dressing room, you were quick to duck your own down, hoping if you seemed interested enough in the clothes in front of you, that they might not stop to greet you. 
But they hadn’t just got your attention, and soon enough your mother was already calling out for them before you could hiss at her no. 
“Kiara. Sarah,” She shouted, waving them over with a huge smile. 
They shared that same joy as they embraced your mother in a warm hug, one you were quick to decline as you held your arms to your chest. 
“Happy Birthday I guess,” Sarah beamed. 
“Oh yeah,” Kiara quickly chimed in, turning to you. “Happy Birthday.” 
“Thank you,” you nodded. 
“Will you both be coming tonight?” your mother asked, wide eyes staring at them full of hope. “I expect to see you.” 
“Oh no-” you words were cut off before you could make some excuse for them. 
“Yeah we both are actually,” Sarah said, throwing her arm around Kiara. She gave a wink towards your mother, sharing something unspoken as they both began to laugh. 
All you could do was stare at the ground, practically praying in your mind for them to leave. 
You were sure Kiara caught sight of this, frowning in your direction. This had her yanking Sarah away, both of them waving you off with awkward goodbyes. 
And once they were out of distance you felt yourself able to breathe again. 
“I don’t understand why you don’t talk to those girls anymore,” Your mother said, disappointment laced in her tone. 
You brushed her off, not feeling the need to explain yourself because at the end of the day you didn’t really have a reason. Not one you could explain to her at least. 
And over time she stopped prying for much of an answer. 
-
If your mother knew where you were spending your afternoon, she would have had a fit. 
But that didn’t seem to matter when sandy fingers traced over the skin of your leg, stealing the minutes of your day as if they were mere seconds. 
It wasn’t love with Leo, that you knew. It was just easy. 
He came at a time in your life where you had been desperate to escape your own terrifying reality and the only way you knew how was by the end of the bottle. Eventually your lips moved from sipping on drinks to sipping the last bit of liquor on his lips. But that’s where it started and ended, a few kisses here and there because you never felt more comfortable than a few heated make out sessions. 
And he had never pressured you about it. 
“What you thinking about?” Leo questioned, rolling over in the sand to face you. 
You shrugged, staring endlessly at the sea. . 
“There’s something on your mind,” he urged you to talk, poking at your ankle for your attention. “Tell me.” 
“I’m thinking about how badly I don’t want to go tonight,” you admitted, staring distantly to the other side of the beach. 
“Don’t.” 
“I can’t,” you told him. “It’s one night.” That you told yourself.
“You could take me?” He suggested, chocolate eyes staring through his mop of curly hair. “I could help take your mind off of things.” 
“As if you’d want to go to a Kook party,” you joked, pushing him gently. 
“I forget, we don’t hang out in the same circles.” 
He didn’t seem upset about it, grinning up to the sun in the sky as if it hadn’t even phased him. 
That you were glad for. The mutual agreement between the pair of you, never needing to make it more than it actually was. 
Leo could kiss a million other girls and it wouldn’t bother you at all. He had done, in the parties you had both been to and you were glad for that, not wanting to pretend this was something more. Because that wasn’t what you wanted. 
“I’ll be working a shift at the Wreck tonight,” he told you, sitting up from the floor. “You know if you need me.” 
You smiled at him before turning back to the sky. It was only when the sun seemed to be a bit too low in the sky did you start to panic, searching for your phone through the sand. 
“What?” Leo asked, sensing your urgency. 
“The time it’s-” you groaned when your phone read five pm, along with three missed calls made at least half an hour ago from your mother. “I have to go.” 
You jumped to your feet, grabbing your bag and the rest of your things. 
Leo didn’t bother to get up, only turning to watch you as you began to run away. 
“I’ll probably see you tomorrow,” You shouted at him with a quick wave. 
Only to hear a “Happy Birthday” when you stood at least twenty metres away. 
-
Your father saved you from your mother’s wrath when you walked through the front door, throwing you a disapproving look as he told you to get ready and head upstairs. 
Even though you hated sociable occasions, you loved your mother and you knew you’d screw her over if you didn’t make sure you were ready on time. Knowing your parents, the Kook population would probably all be in attendance tonight and tardiness just wasn’t an answer. 
Luckily for you, your mother had already laid out the perfect blue summer dress on your bed. Meaning you wouldn’t have to throw out your entire wardrobe just in search of one outfit. 
The way your mother smiled at you, made your eyes roll but your heart warm in your chest. There had been a time when you both struggled to get along, where you had wanted one person to be on your side and she hadn’t been there. But now when she looked at you with glassy eyes and a hand held to her chest, you could allow yourself be happy with her.  Rather than be against her.
“You look amazing,” She exclaimed from the bottom of the stairs. 
“This dress is perfect,” you told her, making your way down the stairs. “Thank you.” 
It was genuine, heartfelt but didn’t last for long. 
“Shall we,” you nodded for the hallway. 
“You need to put this on.” She pulled a blind fold from behind her back. 
“It’s not a surprise when I know about it,” you huffed out. 
“The party isn’t a surprise,” your mother told you, pulling you down the stairs. “Let me just do this one last thing for you.” 
“Fine,” you agreed, standing with your back facing her. 
The tie was loose and if you really wanted to you probably could have wiggled your eyesight free but instead you played the dutiful daughter, letting her drag you through the hallway and towards the backyard. 
As soon as the doors opened you could hear the choir of people singing for you and as much as you hated these sort of situations, being blindfolded made it that much better. 
Your mother must have got you a ridiculous cake, you thought, something with sparklers that you’d struggle to blow out in front of the huge crowd of people. 
But as the song died and the noise of the crowd died with it, you didn’t needed to no longer wonder what the surprise could possibly be. 
Because there came that familiar chuckle and the only voice that could make your whole day crumble with a singular word.
“Happy birthday, princess.” 
The feeling that settled in your stomach was gut wrenching, spreading across your body in an instance. Your heart pounded underneath your breast, making you believe that everyone could hear it as you stood just there unable to move. 
The blindfold around your eyes slipped away and your eyes widened at the sight of him standing in front of you. Tie already loosened around his neck, a few buttons undone of his white button down shirt that he was wearing and that dirty blonde hair of his was hanging around his face. Then there were his eyes, a violent river blue that threatened to spill at any given moment as he stared back at you. 
“Don’t just stand there, Y/N,” your mother squealed, shoving you towards him. 
If Rafe hadn’t been there to catch you, you would have fallen onto the floor face first. But instead his hands wrapped around your shaking frame, pulling you into his hold and suffocating you with his intoxicating scent. As his hand yanked you closer, you felt a deep pain in your stomach and it didn’t have anything to do with how tight he was holding you.
“You’re embarrassing me,” Rafe hissed into your ear. 
Without question you hugged him back, closing your eyes as you repeated in your head, this wasn’t happening. 
“There you go,” you heard your mother shout, others clapping to join her. 
Even though there had been times where you had wished that anybody would notice your reluctance to be around him, at that moment you were glad people believed your fake facade to have Rafe Cameron back in your life. 
When Rafe finally let you go, he didn’t fully let you out of his hold. With one of his hands pressed to the small of your back, Rafe had already drawn the invisible string that attached you to him for the rest of the night. 
“I’m sorry I couldn’t be here any earlier,” Rafe told you parents, turning you both towards them as the rest of the crowd dispersed. “We only got in this afternoon.” 
“It’s no problem,” your mother beamed, brushing it off with her hand. “I’m just so glad you could make it.” 
“I wouldn’t miss it for the world.” 
Rafe had always been good at sweetening your mother up, it’s why she had a hard time when you had distanced yourself from him all those years ago. 
“Am I alright to take the birthday girl for a second?” Rafe asked even though he already knew the answer. 
“Of course,” your father nodded at him. 
Your breathing was still off, uneven as you struggled to get back to normal. 
Rafe didn’t take you far, he never really needed to go far in these situations. The magic of him being the Kook King was the willingness people had to turn a blind eye.
“I have a present for you,” Rafe said, pulling out a small box from the pocket of your trousers. 
“What are you doing here?” You whispered, tears catching in your throat. 
Rafe looked down at you with squinted eyes, his smile already dropping in your presence. “Turn around.” 
You obeyed, standing with your back facing him. “I thought you were in the Bahamas helping with your dad’s business there.” 
“I was always going to come home, Y/N.” 
His hands came in front of you, along with a long gold chain and a single R dangling off of it. You could feel the bile rise in your throat and when his fingers brushed against your skin, you struggled to keep it down. 
“Lift your hair for me.” 
Your hands were shaking as you lifted your hair out of the way for him. 
As the clasp to the necklace, a single tear slid down your cheek, one you were quick to wipe away. 
All you wanted to do was sob when you felt Rafe press a gentle kiss on your shoulder. But you kept it in, only staring back at him with glassy eyes when he finally turned you around. 
“You better start smiling,” Rafe told you through a clenched jaw, cupping your cheeks as he held your face closed. “I came all this way to see you on your birthday. I came back for you.” 
In some way that was true but you knew Rafe was only self serving at heart. 
Rafe Cameron had come back to claim what he believed was rightfully his. And you’d bear the heavy weight of that with the gold collar he had forced around your neck. 
“You can’t just expect me to be happy,” you croaked, staring up at him with wet eyelashes. “Not after everything.” 
“A million girls would kill to be in your place,” he warned you but you both knew it was an empty threat. 
“You’ve picked them before,” you hissed at him, “So why not just pick them again.” 
Rafe shook his head, leaning down till your foreheads were pressed together. “I was stupid back then, didn’t realise you were all I ever wanted.” 
Before you knew it he was kissing you, teeth brushing against yours, desperate for access that you were unwilling to give. 
It was a battle then, not one that anyone could see. With you fighting to get away as you pressed both hands against his chest and with him winning as he gripped onto the nape of your neck, forcing you to stay. 
It ended with a harsh bite to your lips and Rafe leaning away. 
He stared down at you, taking in your outfit from head to toe and his lips curled up as if he was satisfied. 
“I see you got the dress I bought you,” Rafe teased, fingers reaching to play with the hem. 
Your eyes widened at the sight, realising the blue matched perfectly with the trousers and jacket he was wearing. “I think I’m going to be sick.” 
Before you knew it, Rafe was cupping your cheeks bringing your gaze back up to his. “You’re in shock,” he told you, nostrils flaring slightly. “I can understand it’s been a while.” 
“It’s been eleven months,” you were quick to point out.
“I can excuse your unwillingness this one time but you better start smiling fast,” Rafe’s tone was clear and low, sending a cruel shiver down your spine as you remembered the previous times he had used it. He rested his forehead against yours, brushing your hair behind your ears as he held you there. “Because I didn’t come back from a year away in the Bahamas to be embarrassed by you.” 
“I hoped you wouldn’t come back,” you whispered. 
Rafe chuckled and stared down at you with dilated eyes. “You start acting like a dutiful girlfriend or tonight I won’t be so forgiving-” You felt his hands squeeze your head tighter, making you wince in pain. “-and trust me, Y/N, I have a lot that I need to forgive you for.” 
“Girlfriend?” You choked out.
He released his grip and pressed his hand back to the small of your back. “What did you think was happening all those months ago?” 
You could say a lot of things. Things that Rafe wouldn’t like to hear but the one thing you wouldn’t say was a consensual relationship. 
“Be the good girl I know you can be.” That was all he whispered before he pushed you back into the crowd of people. 
You were quick to throw on a fake smile, grinning by Rafe’s side for the whole night just like the good doll he wanted you to be.
605 notes · View notes
machiavellli · 6 months
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Some Theodore Nott headcanons˚ ༘ ೀ⋆。˚
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Notes: I’m no ff writer, but in the past couple of days @slytherinslut0 kept taking about him and so I went on the internet and did the only sane thing I had to do: search any piece of information about the actor. And ever since I discovered that Lorenzo Zurzolo is not only Italian, but from ROME, I can’t stop thing about him. I need to let out those thoughts of mine.
Now, you don’t understand. ROMAN GUYS LOVE ON ANOTHER LEVEL. Like this is very personal and subjective maybe BUT, in humble opinion, they become absolutely and utterly taken by you. It’s wonderful. Like maybe I am idolizing, but let’s take my bf as an example, Roman guy ™️, he loves like no one else. Then, girls from Lazio will probably throw tomatoes at me, but no one can stop me right now.
Disclaimer: English is not my first language, almost totally fluff. Based on personal experience. NOT PROOFREAD (class is starting RIGHT NOW)
Scusatemi per la probabilmente pessima interpretazione dei ragazzi romani, care personcine romane, io sono più del sud, ma vivo più a Nord, al Nord oltre al Nord (un bel mix if you ask me). Questa è pura esperienza personale che trasferisco su un personaggio immaginario.
-—-—-——-—-—
Theodore Nott, your Italian Slytherin guy:
He might take his time to decide if you are the one for him
BUT the moment he decides you are the one for him, he will take you out on a date in less than a week starting from now
There is no point on waiting any longer.
He will arrange the date, you just have to show up and look pretty, no need to lift a finger for anything else.
Old fashioned type of guy.
(And I feel like his fashion reflects that)
Will hold any door for you, move the chair for you, pay dinner and even your ride back home if necessary.
Maybe if you go with him for a walk after your dinner and the right atmosphere forms, you will have your first kiss with him. Something very delicate, soft, but still exciting.
He will probably ask to see you again the very next day, he can’t take enough of you.
As I said, I think Roman guys are pretty direct, they don’t waist their time, it’s either with them or nothing. No games to play.
So yeah, you might not be used to but he will ask you to be his girlfriend in a very little time (for me it was the day of my first date, but again, very personal)
Why should he wait? He likes you and that’s all that matters.
After that: you got him in a chokehold.
He will walk you to class. Every. Single. Day.
Will do absolutely anything just to spent more time with you.
He might be a little shy to start using “pet names”
Maybe he will start with a simple “amò” (short version of “love”), which is romantic, but not strictly, I also use it with my girl friends (and a more corrupted version is “amio”, but I use it only as a joke, but there are girls who actually use it and no shame on that)
Many guys usually refer to their girlfriends as “la mia tipa” (which I don’t like), and he will also do that at first, but once he gets comfortable he will always call you “la mia ragazza” (even in front of his friends)
And I have to advise you on that, he will tell you that infamous “ti amo” pretty soon too.
Again: no time to die (is this an actual English saying or am I just make it up right now?boh)
You two are watching the sunset, when you notice that he’s not looking at the sky anymore but at you
A couple of minutes pass by and you ask “what is it?”
With those big beautiful eyes and that smirk of his, he will look at you and just say “nothing amore, ti amo”
He won’t expect for you to say it back
You can wait as long as you like for telling it back, there’s no rush, no pressure to say it back
Your moroso (usually adults use this term but for me it’s cute) just wanted to let you know that he cares about you.
He will literally say “because it felt right, why should I wait?”
My man is just expressing what he feels
And you want to say no to that???crazyyyy
As I already stated, he is so kind with you and with some time he will absolutely let you know that his love language is touch.
At first in your first months of dating it’s just holding hands, an arm around you shoulder, an arm on your waist,…
And at first he won’t be always touching (and with it I mean the things I listed above) you in public.
Mama’s boy is direct but still has light sheer of shyness
How could he not. He finds you beautiful under every light.
BUT THEN
And with it I mean after you get intimate, which will take a a couple of months
Listen, if things are serious in real life, it takes a bit of time…so’ seria io quindi per me funziona così
After that he will and without holding back always touching you in public (WHICH DOESNT MEAN IN A SENSUAL WAY)
He will hold your hand, put a hand on your thigh,… this type of stuff. He just needs to know you are here with him.
Definitely the type of guy that tries to kiss you even at the worst moments.
You are speaking with someone? What does it mean that he can’t kiss you? Ao non scherziamo qua
You are his and he definitely doesn’t share
(And he’s definitely yours don’t worry, absolutely don’t worry.)
Jealous type of of guy.
Let’s be honest here: he won’t be happy about your guy friends (maybe I’m toxic but I won’t be happy about his girl friend that are not my friend first too)
If you can drop them, it’s for the best.
“Io so che cazzo pensano quelli” he will tell you a bit frustrated
My man just wants to protect you, Italian guy ™️ behavior (very common in my opinion for them to be protective, like last week an Italian guy, a friend 🅰️🅾️, from the north literally shielded me from a weird-looking fella, moving me to the other side of the street)
Sometimes he will just look at you and say “sei bellissima” with the cutest smile known to human kind
Or maybe something like “Lo sai che sei proprio bella?” while he similes at you
And yes, he will tell you always and everywhere, even with a whisper during class just to get you flushed, even if you look like shit <3
You will often find asking to yourself how a person can love you so much, care for you so much.
Like this is not a self esteem problem, even if you are extremely confident: you will ask yourself this.
Because in every flaws he finds beauty.
It’s out of this world.
He won’t in fact tolerate you taking shit about yourself and he might be even be rude about it
“Smettila con ste cazzate.”
He can’t comprehend how you could say that about yourself, “la sua amata e diletta” (si si lo so, “diletta” è come Machiavelli definisce sua moglie e sì non c’entra per nulla, ma volevo aggiungerlo, non rovinatemi la magia)
He will talk with you about your future, about how he would like to have kids with you, “pensa che bello avere dei piccoli noi che corrono in giro per casa”
And then, this one is extremely based on personal experience, after some time he will just start saying “I wanna marry you”, “Ti voglio sposare”
Even during random moments, he will look at you and just say it
Like, it doesn’t mean you are getting married right now. No. It just means that he wants you forever, he won’t leave you.
He will make you happy in every way possible (yeah even in the bedroom)
Cuddling you is THE activity for him.
And if he can lay between your thighs, that’s basically haven. He won’t stop saying “così soffici” and then kiss them.
He also loves kissing you, as passionate as it gets.
He will “hold you hair in deep devotion” (he is so “I wanna be yours” coded)
Also: “say yes to haven” coded.
He will always protect you, no matter against who.
He will choose you over anything.
If his friend are rude to you or say ANYTHING bad about you, they are over, he won’t tolerate any form of aggression on you.
You are the only woman in this world for him…like even an angel could walk by and he would still have his eyes on you only.
He won’t even look at other girls anymore, why should he? He has found la sua anima gemella dopotutto.
In the end, you really will become il suo tesoro, and the nickname tesoro will probably be the most used one.
“Ti amo tantissimo”, ti dirà ogni sera prima di darti la buonanotte.
-—-—-——-—-—
-> part II
Ahh ​Roman guys are my Roman Empire.
My asks are open btw!
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hg-aneh · 7 months
Note
will you ever come back, or is this an indefinite hiatus/straight up dipping?
i don't know
all the i miss yous are making me want to come back but ik i would just be terrified and motionless as soon as i do
Vent-ish Rant downstairs
CW: Pedophilia, Antisemitism, Suicide, Ableism, Harassment, Bullying, all the important words except for murder basically
i want to fix things in private with the people who hurt me so things can be okay and I don't out them for being wieners
but i also want everyone to know who hurt me, yet I'm aware it's not the right choice to make. social media outrage barely leads to anything, specially where minors are concerned
hell,now that i think about it, considering the fact that they genuinely don't believe people older than them are allowed to have feelings, I don't even think talking would be the right move
it's scary, its fucking scary
fuck. the whole thing started with a person mocking the way i spoke about crowley telling me to stop babying him because i was a legal adult and shouldn't be speaking like that
i had just turned 18 and the person was only a year younger than me
like when it's gone to that point and shit is that fucked up, what can one person even do
i remember i laughed about it back then but truth be told, every single little thing I've been told and that I've listened to coming from the people who hurt me has fucking destroyed me as a person
I looked at my older Discord messages, from before this whole mess started. I was so fucking happy and shameless with my joy, now look at my sorry ass
i just.
it's crazy that i have to go around masking in social media of all places because there are people that take such offense to me being cringe that they legitimately turn into high school mean girls
it's crazy that there are people who claim I'm something i am not because they want to make me look bad in the eyes of their little circlejerking friend groups so they can feel like the hero of the story
it's crazy that empathy goes completely out of the window when an account is big, that people don't see human beings as human beings when they're behind a screen
"just log off lol" i am a lonely shut in motherfucker due to my autism (that, surprise surprise, hinders my ability to socialize), you do not understand what you're asking of me, specially while being in this country and at this point in time where I'm actively craving to kick the metaphorical bucket, at daily risk of doing so, and what basically is house arrest for my own safety and well being
(aka, avoiding to physically yeet myself into upcoming traffic or buying something to actually seal the deal)
thus far I've been accused of antisemitism, pedophilia, being too self-centered (which. bro, the reason why i talk about myself is because it's the one thing i can comment on without being scared of some random person coming to tell me "NuH uH" about it out of nowhere or worse, having their feelings hurt because I don't agree with them 100%), proshipper (which, to those people, the word implies wonderful labels such as "incest apologist" "pedophile" (again) "abuse endorser" among other things) ((sidenote, I'm on neither side on that particular discourse. my friends from both sides know this. I would elaborate on my stance if this wasn't already long enough, but it is, so I'm leaving it at an "I don't care, you do you, but please leave me out of it")), being... mean... because i blocked someone...? (this one is just. that's how the second wave of hate started btw. yeah, because i blocked someone. holy fuck), and there's probably a handful of other things I haven't seen yet. fuck it, there's probably someone out there calling me a zoophile because of my catboy au
My friends who I will not name because I don't want the high school mean girls crusade to get to them, have helped me stash out evidence for all of the accusations and bullying.
fuck, they were the ones who let me know about it on the first place, both actions for which i am eternally thankful for because it means I can defend myself properly should the occasion arise (dios no quiera)
I've already had to make a post on Xitter responding to the antisemitism and pedophilia claims, in which, for the latter, i had to reveal extremely personal information for the people who started this to give me respite if only for a while
and. ugh
What I'm trying to get at with all of this is. it's. coming back is scary. i want to but at the same time I don't think I can take this shit anymore
I wish I had people defending me like this when the harassment started because I'm a spineless little bitch who'd rather talk things out and at least be neutral with people than clap back and tell them to stop being stinky
but what's done is done and now i just gotta figure out how to fix my head before i do something stupid
this is not the full story obviously, I'm cutting off certain details as well as more personal depression stuff to not make this bible longer than it already is
fuck
TLDR: I need a hug, idk if I'm coming back, I probably will cuz I can't say no to people, and some teenagers are horrible
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keerysfreckles · 6 months
Text
safe haven - mike schmidt
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pairing: mike schmidt x f!reader
summary: mike schmidt's next door neighbor seems on edge when she knocks on his front door. the reason being remains unknown, until mike orders a pizza and lets the scared girl stay the night.
warnings: use of y/n and she/her pronouns, mentions of an abusive and toxic relationship, slight cursing
michael schmidt wasn't used to any of his neighbors knocking on his door. the only interactions being simple waves while getting the mail, or nods of their heads when they drive by.
mike instantly recognized his next door neighbor as he opens the front door. he's seen her plenty of times before, but the two haven't spoken to each other.
he notices her shaken up appearance, as her loose t-shirt hangs off one shoulder, and the grey sweatpants on her hips are barely tied. her hair is down, but the baby hairs by her forehead are erratically skewed.
"hello?"
mike's simple gretting takes the girl out of her trance. she kept looking between mike and her own front door. she fiddled with her hands before responding.
"yes, hi, uh- look i know we've never really talked before, but can i please stay here for an hour? two at most," y/n pleads, her eyes never faltering from her front door, with worry filling her pupils.
mike nods, before opening his door so y/n can walk inside, "are you alright?"
y/n's fast to shake her head, "no, um- no not really."
mike doesn't think he's ever seen her like this. "do you want something to drink? or a snack or something?"
"just water, please," y/n shuffles awkwardly by the kitchen counter, as she watches mike grab a glass and fill it was tap water.
y/n's grateful once the cool liquid flows down her throat. all of the screaming she had just done really did some damage on her throat.
mike couldn't help but notice the small bruises covering her wrists, and the giant red mark on her neck as she tilted her head back to drink the water.
"do you want to talk about anything? you seem on edge," mike offers, as he leads the two to the living room. he sits on the couch, and y/n sits down beside him.
just as y/n opens her mouth to respond, abby comes running down the hallway, a notebook in one hand and colored pencils in the other.
"who are you?"
abby's bluntness throws y/n off gaurd, causing her to laugh. she can't even remember the last time she laughed.
"abbs, this is our neighbor, y/n. she's gonna hang out here for a bit," mike tells abby, watching as she sits at the coffee table in front of the couch.
mike and y/n both turn their attention to the tv, which is playing reruns of a sitcom. they both felt it wasn't the most appropriate time to talk about y/n's situation while abby was in the room.
"what are those marks on your wrist from?" abby suddenly asks, catching both adults off gaurd.
"oh, uh, they're from bracelets i had on earlier. guess they were too tight." mike took notice of the way y/n's voice shook at the end of her response.
"hey abby, why don't you go back to your room and draw something for y/n. yeah?" mike offers his sister, who nods in return, before she walks down the hallway back to her room.
"you don't have to talk about anything by the way. i'm not gonna force you," mike spoke softly, not wanting to scare y/n more than she already was.
y/n's knee started to shake and her voice wavered as she responded, "my boyfriend- well ex-boyfriend now uh- he got too much. everything was fine until last month when he started to get aggressive."
mike's eyes slightly widened.
"at first it was only verbally. but when i came home last week, he hit me because i stayed late at work. i tried to tell him why, but he just wouldn't listen," y/n's eyes started to water as she remembers the events that took place.
"today was just so bad. i had to get out of there before he did anything worse," y/n finally looks up at mike, and sees nothing but sincerity in his eyes. her heart slightly sped up at the fact someone was actually listening to her.
"so you came here to get away from him?" mike concluded, causing y/n to nod.
"you can stay here as long as you need to okay?"
y/n nodded once more, thankful for mike's proposal. however a harsh knock on the front door caused her head to turn quickly, and michael stood from the couch. "probably just some solicitors. i'll get them to leave."
y/n stayed on the couch while mike opened the door. his heartrate picked up once he was met with a taller man, with a scruffy beard and dark curly hair. he seemed to have a glint of hatred in his eyes, and mike could only guess this was the person y/n was hiding from.
"can i help you?"
"you haven't seen y/n around, have you? she ran out a bit ago," the man explained, seeming way too calm about the situation.
mike shakes his head, "nope, haven't seen her today."
y/n's heart races as she listened to their conversation from the living room. she can't help but worry he's going to come inside and take her back to the toxic home she just came from.
y/n picks her head up at the loud noise, and stands up abruptly from the couch once she sees mike stumble back from her ex-boyfriend pushing the door open.
"you bitch!" he screams, instantly grabbing y/n's wrist, making her yelp out in pain. "i told you not to leave! and you come over here to whore around with him?"
*brad let go," the only three words y/n manages to get out, as she's more focused on planting her feet to try and make her unmovable.
brad only pulls on y/n's wrist harder, and slaps her cheek with his empty hand. y/n cups her cheek in shock, as brad pulls her out of the house and into mike's front yard.
mike follows the two, and jogs over to brad and pushes his chest, causing him to let go of y/n.
"y/n get back inside, lock the door," mike orders. y/n's quick to run back inside as she watches mike tell brad off through the window.
a few minutes pass and mike knocks on the front door. y/n of course lets him inside his home, and as soon as he closes and locks the door y/n wraps her arms around his waist.
mike's shortly taken aback before he holds onto the poor girl. he hears her start to cry, as her body starts to shake. mike holds y/n's head to his chest and he gently sways the two side to side.
"you're okay. you're safe here," mike whispers against the top of y/n's head. "do you want to stay for dinner?" he offers, of course wanting to do nothing but cheer the girl up.
y/n pulls back from the hug and wipes her tears, before nodding her head.
mike's quick to dial the local pizza shop as y/n sits back down on the couch, her hand immediately goes to her wrist and looks at the new bruise already starting to form.
mike walks down the hallway to abby's room, for two reasons. he first asks if she heard any of the yelling, to which she responded no since she had her radio playing. and secondly he asked if she wanted to join him and y/n in the living room and have pizza soon.
y/n watched as both mike and abby walked out of the hallway. mike sat beside y/n on the couch and abby sat at the coffee table again, as she continued to work on her drawing for y/n.
"are you cold?" mike asks y/n, seeing the goosebumps covering her arms. she simply nods, and mike leans forward and removes the dark grey hoodie he was wearing. y/n couldn't help but look to his stomach as the movement of him taking the hoodie off cause his shirt underneath to lift. he smiled as he handed her the article of clothing, and couldn't help but feel his heart warm at the sight of his hoodie covering y/n's torso.
a half hour passes, and mike seems to notice how a weight has lifted off y/n's shoulders. y/n and abby have been in a deep conversation about cartoon characters. the conversation however is cut short when the doorbell rings, making y/n jump from her spot on the couch.
mike reaches forward and places his hand over her knee, causing her to look at him. "it's okay, it's just the pizza."
the reassurance calms y/n down, and mike walks to the door. he pays the pizza delivery boy and places the greasy pizza box on the coffee table. he's quick to get paper plates for the three of the them before he sits back down besides y/n.
the trio enjoy their meal together, and abby starts asking y/n questions. like where she's from, where she goes to school, what her favorite color is, and a plethora of other random questions.
after the three finish dinner, mike and y/n are captived by a movie that was now playing on tv. abby was busy adding the finishing touches to her picture for y/n, and was excited to give it to her.
y/n looks down and sees abby handing her a colorful piece of paper, "is this for me?" abby nods.
y/n looks over the paper, seeing three people resembling mike, abby and herself. the figures seem to be outside as they're together in a grassy area with flowers surrounding them.
"i love it abby," y/n smiles, "i'll keep it forever."
two hours pass, and after another movie plays, abby had fallen asleep with her head on her notebook, her right hand still gripping a red colored pencil. mike only laughs, before he shakes abby's shoulder to wake her up.
"i'll be right back," he states. y/n nods as she watches mike lead abby to her bedroom to put her to bed. y/n looks at the clock placed on the wall and sees its nearing eleven pm.
y/n leans her head back on the couch, and can't help but let her eyes close, as sleep takes over.
mike whistles while walking back into the living room, after saying goodnight to abby. his whistling is cut short when he looks at the sleeping girl on his couch. he chuckles at her positon. she's now in a curled ball, as her arms are crossed over her chest.
mike turns off the tv, and grabs the blanket draped over the arm of the chair from across the room. he places the material over y/n, before leaning down and kissing the girl's forehead. he wanted to make sure she knew she was always safe in his home.
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roosterforme · 6 months
Text
Adult Education Part 8 | Hangman x OC
Summary: Plans for the fraternity alumni fundraiser that Jessica is in charge of are starting to take shape. And things with Jake are starting to heat up. But even after she tries her best to take care of her students in her own way, she feels like she will never be successful at this college.
Warnings: Fluff, angst, swearing, smutty thigh riding, 18+
Length: 5200 words
Pairing: Jake "Hangman" Seresin x Female OC
This story is part of the Beer Boy and Sugar universe but can be read on its own! Adult Education masterlist
Seriously, who let Jake on my masterlist!? Banner by @mak-32
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Jessica settled down in the spare seat in her friend's office with her slightly stale peanut butter and jelly sandwich and a notebook. "Wait, say that again. Beer pong with micro brewed beer? Come on, Advanced Calculus. Doesn't that kind of defeat the purpose of the frat boy vibe?" she asked with her pencil poised over the paper. 
The other woman laughed as she ate the turkey and avocado roll ups that her husband packed for her gorgeous looking lunch. Jessica would have had some of Jake's chili to bring except that she finished all of it on Sunday and Monday while she texted him about how good it was. 
"It would be an elevated frat boy vibe. I spent the weekend asking my husband what he would want out of an alumni event with his fraternity, and he came up with some pretty compelling ideas."
Jessica bit into her sandwich with a frown and chewed. "But depending on the turnout, a few kegs of fancy beer could be very expensive."
She shook her head and offered Jessica some mixed berries and a honey dipping sauce which she immediately accepted. "No, because Bradley knows a guy who owns a brewery in Solana Beach. He said he'd ask for a favor if you wanted him to."
Jessica perked up immediately. She had a friend. A friend who had a nice husband who was offering to help her out. As much as she wanted to dream big and believe she could get tenure if this thing was successful, she was afraid to hope too hard. 
But she couldn't help herself. "Solana Beach isn't that far away. You think this guy would really cut me some sort of deal? My budget from the school is pretty tiny."
She shrugged. "He was in Bradley's fraternity at UVA. He's actually a really nice guy, so I wouldn't be too surprised."
Jessica only had to think about it for another second. "Okay yes. I am very interested in this idea." Then she ate a few more berries and jotted down some other ideas they came up with. hors d'oeuvres from the culinary school
frat boys in tuxedos
sparkling wine
silent auction
As she was finishing the last item, the other woman asked, "How was your weekend with Jake?"
When Jessica met her eyes, she could tell she was blushing. But she laughed softly and said, "I think he's my boyfriend?"
"Really?" she asked, nearly dropping her turkey roll up on her lap. "I'm sorry, but are you serious? You and Jake are exclusive?"
"Yes," Jessica whispered. Right? Hadn't he made it clear he wasn't seeing anyone else and didn't want to? Oh shit. It had been so long since she'd done this, maybe she wasn't even doing it correctly. "Is that okay?"
"Oh my god! He just... I don't think... I don't ever remember mention of him having a girlfriend. Usually he just-" She cut herself off with a wince.
"Picks girls up for the night?" Jessica supplied. She sensed that about him and the way he'd told her some things about himself. But he also bought a new truck so he could make sure he was on time to see her. There was a lot to unpack here.
"Well. Yeah. But I'm not saying I'm surprised that he's into you! You're great! I'm just surprised in general."
"Same." She just hoped she wasn't about to make a fool of herself when Jake stopped by later during her office hours. When she uncrossed and recrossed her legs, she could feel the pull of the green lace against her skin underneath her cute pleated skirt, and her sheer stockings felt like silk. 
"Aside from the fact that he once called me Dr. Tits when he was belligerently drunk at my house, Jake is, and I say this a bit begrudgingly, actually really sweet. And kind. He dropped off two tickets for a Grateful Dead cover band last night since Bradley drove him around a few times after his truck broke down."
"I'm sorry.... did you say he called you Dr. Tits? Please, I'm going to need you to elaborate on that."
-----------------------------
Jake spent Monday night making the most perfect lasagna of his life and waiting until it cooled down to pack some individual containers for Jessica. Then when he left for work on Tuesday, he left them all lined up in his refrigerator so he could grab them on his way to her office hours. 
There was a guest speaker today, and Jake grabbed the empty seat next to Bradley who was trying to discreetly text his wife under the table before the lecture started. 
"What's Dr. Tits up to?" he drawled, earning an eye roll. 
"Text her yourself if you want to know," came the raspy response. "I'm going right to campus after work today to keep her company while she's on a phone conference," he added with a smirk. "Might stop by and talk to your girlfriend about her fundraiser while I'm there."
"That fraternity thing she has to do?" 
"Yeah," Bradley replied, finally putting his phone away. "Sugar asked me to be nice to her, so I'm going to try to save her some money on beer from Beta Brewing."
"Isn't that the place that ages the beer in bourbon barrels and sells it for an outrageous price?"
"Yeah," Bradley said with a laugh. "A guy who was in my fraternity owns it. I haven't seen him in a bit, but I was kind enough to text him on behalf of Jessica. Now will you please stop calling my wife Dr. Tits?"
"No," Jake replied smoothly as Maverick called everyone to attention. 
Bradley just grunted in response.
When they were released from the lecture, Jessica's office hours had already begun. Jake hadn't texted her much since he knew Tuesdays were busy for her. He just needed to get there before 7:00, because somehow if he arrived during her office hours, it made him feel like her student. And that made everything feel a little dirty. And he really fucking liked that. Plus she told him she was going to wear something sexy, and he'd been dying to find out what that meant.
He swung by his place and picked up the containers of lasagna and packed them in a cooler, and then he was off in his new truck. He could count on one hand the number of times he'd visited this part of the city before he met Jessica, but now he was constantly searching the side streets along campus for a parking spot. Tonight he found one on the same block as a familiar, blue Bronco.
Of course he got some looks from the college girls as he strolled toward the math and science building in his khaki uniform, but he was met with a glare from a man a little older than him with salt and pepper hair when he walked inside. 
"Evening," Jake drawled as the other man silently examined his uniform. He could feel eyes on him as he walked toward the elevators. It wasn't like he was forbidden to be here, so he just ignored him. This ride up to her floor and the walk down the hallway had become familiar to Jake. But when he raised his hand to knock, he heard the doorknob turn from the inside along with Jessica's muffled voice. So he leaned back against the opposite wall as the door cracked open. 
"Luca, there's no way I'm going to try out your skateboard."
"Come on, Dr. Reed. Just for a minute? It'll be really fun. But you probably shouldn't wear high heels."
She sighed and pulled her door open further, but she didn't notice Jake yet. "Fine. I'll try your skateboard on Thursday only after you show up on time and give me a full hour of your best effort."
"Sweet!" Luca said, giving her a high five. But now she was distracted by Jake as he smiled at her. 
"Not in the hallway!" Jessica shouted after Luca who set his board down and promptly picked it back up again. 
"My bad, Dr. Reed!"
Jessica was already wrapped up in Jake's arm, her lips ghosting over his. "Hey, Reedy," he whispered, and then he was being jerked away from the wall as she led him inside and closed the door, leaning back against it.
"Hi," she whispered back. Jake let his eyes drift down over her petite form and back up again, every inch of clothing and everything that was bare to him was making him salivate. She had on a rather short pleated skirt with sheer stockings and black heels. Plus he could see the telltale green strap peeking out from the white camisole as her cardigan slipped down her bare shoulder.
He swallowed hard. "You look nice, Baby. You having a good day?"
"Yes!" she gushed, wrapping her arms around his neck and kissing him harder this time. "My faculty meeting was blessedly canceled this morning, and I ate lunch with Advanced Calculus." 
Jake set the cooler down on her desk in the tiny office so he could have better access to her body. "That's great. You call her Advanced Calculus? That's actually so cute," he said as his hands came to rest on her hips. 
Jessica laughed, and he felt warm all over. "Yes, and she calls me Advanced Physics. And she's helping me plan that fraternity fundraiser along with her husband. Bradley actually stopped by a little while ago, before Luca was here. He's just the best. Advanced Calculus is so lucky."
"He's the best?" Jake asked, one eyebrow raised as he leaned down and kissed her bare shoulder making her shiver. "She's so lucky?"
When he ran his nose along that pretty green bra strap, she gasped. "Not as lucky as me."
Jake chuckled and murmured, "That's my smart girl." He brushed her hair aside and kissed his way from her shoulder up her neck to her ear while she clung to him. 
She cleared her throat and asked, "How was your day?" as she tried to pull away from him. But Jake kept her right where she was. 
"Better now," he promised. "Had to sit through a talk about the updates coming to my jet this summer. A new mechanical override and an updated comms system among other things."
"Ohhh," she sighed. "Did they give you a new spec sheet?" Her eyes were curious behind her glasses, and Jake was grinning.
"Sure did. You wanna see it?"
"Yes!"
"Well, that's classified, Baby."
She pouted and said, "Come on, Jake. I won't tell anyone. Can't you sneak one home with you or something?"
He ran his big hands up and down her back. "You want to work out some of the calculations, don't you?"
"Of course I do," she replied softly, and Jake was getting a little hot just thinking about her sitting in his kitchen with a pencil and a calculator. He trailed his hand down to her ass, and she was kissing him again as she touched his pins.
"If you really want to see them," he said between kisses, "I'll sneak them out." She giggled as she kissed his neck, and then his nose was buried in her hair. "God, you look so sexy, and you smell so sweet."
Her glasses bumped his cheek when she kissed his ear and raked her fingers through his hair. Every inch of the front of her body was pressed to his, and Jake just knew there was no coming back from this right now. Jessica had dressed like this with him in mind, and while her outfit was totally work appropriate, it was also a thing of fantasies. Skirts and heels and green lingerie and stockings. 
"I can't seem to stop thinking about you," she said in the sweetest voice before she sucked on his lip. He wondered if her stockings were the kind that ended at her thighs or the ones that went all the way up to her waist. He needed to know. She didn't make him wait for an answer. Jessica guided him to the chair behind her desk, and he sat down a little hard. She was standing right in front of him with her gaze fixed on his pants, and when Jake glanced down, he could see the outline of his cock as he stood at attention for her. 
"I'm sorry," he grunted, "but you turn me on so much."
"Don't apologize," she breathed, and he was treated to the sight of her sliding that cardigan down her arms. When she turned slightly and dropped it onto her desk, her skirt rode up her leg. Jake could see the lace trimmed top of her stocking hugging her thigh, and he groaned so loudly, her gaze snapped back to his. 
"Jessica." His voice was a needy whine, and for some reason this was so much worse than when he almost fucked her on his couch. Because she was his girl now, and he wanted every inch of her well acquainted with every inch of him. "Come here." When he patted his right thigh, she obeyed him immediately, coming to stand with his knee between her legs. 
Then she hesitated, and Jake didn't want to push anything. When he was just about to tell her that nothing sexual needed to happen here, he watched her reach up underneath her skirt and bend a little at the waist. His gaze shifted so rapidly from her pretty eyes to the lacy tops of her sheer stockings, he thought he might pass out. And then she started to slide that green thong down her hips to her thighs, and Jake caught the briefest glimpse of her pussy before her underwear was down her legs and her skirt fell into place once more.
"Fuck. Jessica." He was a panting mess as she stepped out of her thong and handed it to him. It was wet, and when he pressed it to his nose, it smelled incredible. And she was once again positioning herself with her legs straddling his right one before she came to rest with her pussy on his khaki covered thigh.
"Is this okay?" she whispered as her right knee nudged his cock, and his head tipped back slightly. She bit her lip and ran one gentle finger along his name tag, spelling out SERESIN while she looked him in the eye. 
"Yeah," he groaned. "God. It's more than okay." She kissed him with her palm planted on his chest, and Jake was living for the way her hips rocked forward. 
Her glasses and hair were tickling his face as she brought her other hand up to his neck, and then Jessica rocked her hips back and forward once again along his thigh. There was a smile on her lips as she kissed him and whispered, "You can set that down, you know." 
Jake was still gripping her thong in his hand, and he pressed it to his mouth and lips one more time before stuffing it in his breast pocket. The fact that she was rubbing her bare ass and pussy on his uniform had him painfully hard, but he didn't want her to stop. This was a thousand times better than any lap dance he'd ever had before. 
"You excited to see me today, Baby?" he asked, squeezing both of her knees with his hands and then guiding them up to her skirt. "This is a very warm welcome."
Her cheeks were flushed as Jake pushed her skirt up a few inches to play with the lace stockings. When he ran his thumbs along the soft, bare skin of her inner thighs, she whined his name. "Jake!" 
"Fuck," he grunted, squeezing her with both hands as she rode his thigh, now gripping both of his shoulders. She was kind of jerking her hips along as her glasses slid down her nose. Jake leaned in to kiss her neck and chest as he whispered, "You gonna get off like this?" She squeaked as his fingers toyed with her stockings before he brushed her wet slit with his thumb. 
"I never did before," she said, eyes a little wild now. Every time she rolled her hips back so she was sitting on her ass, she grunted a soft little sound that almost sent him through the roof. 
"Baby, you can't tell me things like that and make those perfect little sounds okay?" he whispered. "Because now I need to get you off." He guided one hand around to palm her bare ass and tipped her chin up with the other. "Okay?" he asked, running his thumb along her lips. She nodded and kissed his thumbprint before he reached down and lifted up her skirt. "Holy hell," he moaned. Her pussy looked exquisite, and there was a wet spot the size of her palm on his service khakis from her slick.
While he was absolutely aching to get his cock inside her, he knew there would be time for that later. This weekend, perhaps. But right now, he thought she was close to coming on his fucking uniform. In her goddamn office. On the college campus. And he needed to make it a reality, because he could feel her wetness on his leg as she ground down against him. 
So he kept his left hand on her ass, guiding her movements just a little slower as he took one more look at her pink pussy spread open for him, and he stroked her clit with his right thumb. And then Jessica was shaking almost instantly as she kissed his lips and muttered something incoherent. 
"Come on baby. You're so close," he whispered between kisses. "This is so hot." Every time her knee bumped his cock, he thought he might cum in his pants, but he kept her going. 
"Oh. My. God!" she whined suddenly before sucking in a deep breath and arching her back. Jake rubbed his face across her tits, nipples peaked through the fabric of her bra and camisole. And then she was coming and keening, and he eased up the pressure of his thumb and enjoyed every sound she made for him.
Jessica collapsed against his chest, lips pressed to his ear and cheek as she combed her fingers through his hair and rode out the little aftershocks. He ran his hand along her ass, stroking her until she stopped rocking gently against him. As she kissed her way to his lips, her fingers found his insignia pins just like always. Their kisses were soft and leisurely like she'd really worn herself out, and when she shifted, he grunted as her knee nudged his cock again.
She looked at him with wide eyes as she brought her hand down to his pants. "I'm so sorry," she gasped with a soft laugh. "I'm in such a daze, I wasn't even thinking. Let me take care of you."
Jake was shaking his head and immediately reaching for her hand. "Absolutely not." He would cum in an instant if she touched his bare dick with any part of her pretty body, and that was not something he was interested in at the moment. 
"Why not?" she asked, looking thoroughly upset now as she pulled away from him to stand. Jake had to bite his knuckle at the sight of the mess she left on his khakis, and his cock jumped painfully in his pants. 
"Baby, look what you did," he crooned, gesturing at his thigh. "It's gorgeous." But when he met her eyes, she was blushing and reaching for her cardigan. "Jessica, I can't have you taking care of this for me right now. I'm too worked up, and I'd rather have blue balls than cum as soon as you look at me, okay?"
She laughed as she pulled her sweater on, and she let Jake kiss her. "Okay," she replied softly as she looked down at his wet pants. "I can't believe I did that."
"Listen," he whispered, boxing her in between his body and her desk. "I think you should come spend the weekend at my place. Pack an overnight back and some more journals... the real sexy ones on the top shelf over there." He jerked his chin toward her bookshelf. "And I'll steal you a top secret spec sheet that could cost me some of my pins that you like touching so much."
"I could do that," she replied with a smile. "I need to go up to Beta Brewing with Bradley on Saturday morning, but after that, I'm free."
Jake kissed her as he pulled her green thong out of his pocket. "Sounds perfect. And I'm going to need you to wear this again on Saturday, okay? I didn't even get to see the bra yet."
She balled it up in her hand like she was suddenly embarrassed by it. "Alright." But he tipped her chin up again so she was looking at him.
"I can't get enough of you."
Then the sweet kisses returned before she took him by the hand and selected a small stack of journals for him to take him. "Here's a spicy one from the top shelf," she told him with a smile that made him feel weak. Then he said he would walk her and the cooler of food to her car. And she tried to hide her face against his pins when that same guy was walking through the lobby again, because Jake still had a wet spot on his pants from her pussy. 
"You think I care?" he whispered to her before he nodded at the guy with salt and pepper hair. "I got my girl with me, and she got off on me."
"Jake," she gasped with a laugh, pulling him outside quickly. "He's the head of the chemistry department. And he already hates me."
"Who in their right mind could hate you?" His mind drifted for a moment to all the supposed rumors about her that were floating around. "Wait, is he the guy who got permanently banned from Chippy's?" He dug his feet in and there was no way she could pull him anywhere. "Why doesn't he like you?"
Jake was turning back to look into the building, ready to give this asshole a piece of his mind, but Jessica was still pulling on him. "Don't worry about it. Walk me to my car so we can make out." But he was going to worry about it. And yeah, he made out with her next to her car until he was starting to get hard again, which was honestly very painful now. And he was still thinking about it when he watched her pull away. He headed home to jerk off and start to consider what he could cook this weekend, but it still really irritated him that someone found something to dislike about the first woman he ever thought he could be serious with. Because in his mind, she was perfect. 
-----------------------------
"Luca, focus on the math, or I'm not going to embarrass myself on your skateboard."
"Sorry, Dr. Reed."
Jessica had to keep drawing her failing student's attention back to the problem sheet in front of him, but that threat really seemed to do the trick. For some reason, this kid really wanted to see her eat asphalt. And now he was solving all of the problems correctly. "Yes! Keep going." She watched him write out the long equation for the last question, and she murmured, "One just like that will be on the exam next week."
"Sweet," he replied with a smile. "I'll study this weekend. Weather is supposed to be shitty for surfing."
She rolled her eyes but collected his paper when he was finished. "This is all correct," she said as she stood up on the other side of the desk in her sneakers and pantsuit. "You just always rush instead of taking your time. I know you can pass my classes. You need them to graduate on time."
"I know," he whined and sat back in the other chair. "I'll keep coming to your office hours."
"Just keep trying and keep studying. I know it's not as hard as you think it is."
Then he stood and picked up his skateboard, and Jessica groaned. "Okay, but only for a minute."
"You say that now, but I think you're going to love it," Luca said as she followed him out of her office and down the hallway. "You're at least fifty years younger than everyone else who works here. You might think skateboarding is fun."
Jessica had to stifle a snort as they walked past Dr. Leeland's open door where he was napping in his chair. "That's not polite, Luca," she managed to say.
"Yeah, but it's still true."
On the ride down the elevator, she listened to him explain how to keep yourself balanced while riding. "Don't make any sudden movements. And don't lean backwards. Actually, don't lean forward either."
Jessica sighed. At least she could spend about a half second on this skateboard and then excuse herself back up to her office to pack up. Then she could call Jake on her way home and hear his sexy voice and talk about the weekend.
Once they were outside on the deserted sidewalk which was lit up by the dying sunset and campus security lights, Luca set the skateboard down with a huge grin on his face. "You're the coolest, Professor Reed. Now step up with your right foot."
She tried it and shook her head before planting both feet back on the ground. "Nope. It's already rolling away!"
"Here. I'll stand on the front so it won't move so much while you get on it."
With a deep sigh, she tried it again, but she started wobbling from side to side this time. "Luca!" she gasped, reaching for his outstretched hand. "This is not fun!"
He was laughing as he said, "It takes practice. Just hold my hand for a second and push off with your left foot." When he removed his foot from the board, she pushed off and went gliding forward as she screeched and held onto his hand with a death grip. "Yeah! That's it!" 
She jumped off, looked at him, and said, "Can I do it again?" 
Five minutes later, she was laughing as she tried pushing off with her right foot. "I can recommend a great skate shop for you!" Luca said as she slowly skated away from him and down the sidewalk. Damn, this was kind of addicting. She jumped down and skated back toward him as she cackled.
"You better move. I'm coming in hot!" she said, rolling so slowly it was laughable. Then she looked up into the icy blue eyes of Brian Conley who was scowling at her. She jumped awkwardly off of the skateboard, and it continued to roll to Luca who picked it up.
"What the hell are you doing, Dr. Reed?" Brian practically yelled even though she was right in front of him. She hated that she immediately felt tears stinging behind her eyes. "Can't you be professional for even just ten minutes?"
"I was just-" she started, but then Luca cut in when she really wished he wouldn't.
"It was my idea, Dr. Conley. Dr. Reed just finished tutoring me, and I thought it would be fun."
Brian just shook his head and sighed. "That's enough fun for one day I think."
"I'm sorry, Dr. Reed," Luca muttered as he hoisted his backpack on and started skating away. And then Jessica really wished she could vanish, because Jake was heading up the sidewalk at a blistering pace, a scowl on his handsome features while Brian went off.
"It's not your job to be messing around with your students. It is your job to be teaching them. I know for a fact that you have several students failing your classes, and I don't think skateboarding with them is quite the correct answer here, do you? If you think you're even close to being qualified for tenure, you are out of your mind!"
All she could picture was Leeland asleep during his office hours. All she wanted to do was relate to Luca a little bit to keep him interested in things. She was just upholding her end of the bargain since he did so great with the practice problems.
"You're such an asshole," she whispered as her vision blurred with unshed tears. 
When Brian took a step closer so that he was almost touching her, Jessica heard Jake's voice call out in a loud bark. "Hey! Why is she crying?"
"I'm okay," she said softly which just made her want to cry even more. She pushed Brian away from herself and walked the rest of the way toward Jake who had his hands in fists and fire in his eyes. "I'm okay." She had to plant both palms on his chest to get him to look at her instead of Brian. 
"Why are you crying?" he asked, gentler this time as Brian stormed back inside the building. "Should I be going after him?"
"No," she said as she hiccuped, and Jake pulled her against his chest so her glasses got smashed at a weird angle. But she immediately felt better. "What are you doing here?"
He rubbed her back and said, "I missed you and thought maybe you'd want to go to Chippy's after your office hours. I know you were supposed to help that kid Luca, but I figured you might feel like getting a Sam Adams with me. Didn't know I'd potentially have to kick that guy's ass."
Jessica felt like she was going to say something she had no business telling him yet. So she tamped down the words and instead said, "You don't need to kick Brian Conley's ass. He's not even worth it. And I would absolutely love to go to Chippy's with you."
She kissed Jake long and hard on the lips before leading him inside and back up to her office to pack up her things and lock the door. Then they walked across the street, hand in hand. Jake held the door for her, and he finally looked a little calmer now as he walked into Chippy's right behind her. 
"I'm just waiting for him to glare at me," Jake said as he wrapped his arm around her waist. "I really need to take you to the Hard Deck one night, because honestly, Penny could give him a run for his money."
"I'd love to see that," she said with her first smile since she was on the skateboard. She laced her fingers with Jake's and led him to an empty table.
"Reedy," Chippy called out, and sure enough, there was a special glare reserved for Jake. Jessica was beaming by the time he pulled out a stool for her and kissed her. 
"I'll be right back. Hopefully," Jake said with a look of extreme fear as he headed to the bar. This was her peaceful space away from Brian. And she felt safe with Jake and Chippy. And Jake was completely right; a beer and some peanuts were exactly what she needed right now. 
-----------------------------
Can't wait to check in with Beer Boy's former frat brother. And can't wait for Reedy to spend some more time at Jake's place. Thanks @mak-32 and @beyondthesefourwalls
PART 9
@blahehblah
@sotalife
@desert-fern
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@rosiahills22
@daggerspare-standingby
@je-suis-prest-rachel
@callsign-joyride
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@hangmanbrainrot
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shuaflix · 7 months
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driving lessons for dummies (preview)
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PAIRING ▸ kwon soonyoung x fem!reader
GENRES ▸ fluff, humor (i am bringing back romcoms), smut, strangers to lovers au, college au (WHO GUESSED IT)
WARNINGS ▸ profanity, so much pining, mc has the worst luck imaginable, soonyoung is down horrendous, he is also an olivia rodrigo stan, there is a minor car crash, there is also a very minor description of blood, almost car sex at some point, probably sex that is not in a motor vehicle at some other point if plot allows, pet names (but not in the sexy genre sorry), friend group shenanigans (ft. mingyu, seungcheol, jihoon, junhui) bc im a my little pony friendship is magic type bitch, and other warnings tba bc i haven't finished writing
SUMMARY ▸ you've finally passed your written test and gotten your permit after six failed attempts. eager to get your license while attempting to avoid overpriced driving lessons, you enlist the help of kwon soonyoung, who only requires a STIIZY pod as payment.
RELEASE DATE ▸ out now!
WORD COUNT ▸ around 12k (hopefully......)
AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ i was actually very on the fence about who this fic should be for at first, but...... it was destined to be for hoshi :') also this preview is kinda short because there's so much i don't want to spoil! anywho send an ask or comment to be added to the tag list !! ♡
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KWON SOONYOUNG.
Junhui sent you his number after he dropped you off at your apartment. Apparently, Soonyoung was one of his good friends, who also happened to have a side gig where he gave out driving lessons at a discounted price. Of course, the downside was that Soonyoung wasn’t exactly certified to teach people how to drive, but he was allegedly a good driver.
His lessons were normally for high schoolers, and he charged their parents around a hundred. For adults over the age of 21, though, he had a special offer that you couldn’t resist. 
You texted him to ask if he had any open spots for you. He took a few days to reply, but you eventually got a two-hour slot for the next week. You weren’t sure how effective his lessons would be, but you figured you would give it a shot since he was your age and giving out classes for cheap. 
When the day of your lessons rolled around, you were slightly anxious while you were waiting for him to arrive. You needed Junhui to reassure you for hours last night, promising that no, Soonyoung was not going to kidnap and murder you. He was a student at your university, actually, and he was a public health major who never had a murderous thought in his life.
soonyoung (driving instructor): i’m outside your house 
Okay, if he wasn’t a murderer, then the least he could do was not text you like one.  
After replying with an omw that autocorrected to On my way! and left you feeling very distressed that your communication sounded overly-enthusiastic, you worked up the courage to walk outside to his Honda Accord. 
“Hi,” you greeted shyly when you opened the door. “You’re Soonyoung, right?” 
Honestly, you didn’t care if he was Soonyoung or not. The man sitting in the driver’s seat was probably one of the most attractive people you had ever laid eyes on. Even if he wasn’t Kwon Soonyoung, you would happily let him kidnap you. Maybe you’d even blush a little because he picked you of all people to kidnap. 
He turned to look at you, seeming a little surprised that you opened the door but smiling nevertheless. “Yeah, that’s me. You’re Y/N?” 
When you nodded, he got out of the driver’s seat and motioned for you to take it. You skirted around the car to sit inside while Soonyoung took the passenger’s seat. 
You also got a glance of his off-brand, beige Fear of God Essentials sweater that read M.I.L.F. Hunter instead. Classy. 
“So, you came to me because you didn’t wanna give up your semester’s worth of college tuition for driving lessons,” Soonyoung said with an overwhelming air of confidence. 
“Yeah, pretty much.” You huffed. “Here, I heard this was your payment.”
You handed him a paper bag, not bothering to take out the receipt from the dispensary. Inside was the King Louis XIII STIIZY pod. One gram. 
“Ah, good. You know your stuff.”
Soonyoung hummed as he examined the box, and you were just wondering when he would get to business and start showing you the controls in his car. You were slightly overwhelmed by his impressively relaxed demeanor. Maybe it would have been better if you settled for an uptight woman in her sixties. Pretty boys were always trouble. 
“You made the right choice coming to me. I’m a much better driver than those hags from the driving schools around here,” he continued. It was like he could read your mind; it was almost terrifying. “Plus, way less likely that I’ll get a heart attack in the passenger’s seat.” 
He was a total weirdo, but he was hot, so you supposed it canceled out in some obscure, mathematical sense. 
"That’s… good to hear, I think,” you replied. “So, are you, like, good at this?”
“Are you kidding? I’m basically the Lebron of driving.”
“I see.” You nodded along, unsure. “I don’t watch football, so…” 
“He plays basketball, but close enough.”
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tip-top-cloud-surfer · 2 months
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Never Have I Ever (Part 4) - Hangman
Pairing: Hangman / Civilian Contractor! Reader (Callsign: Dove)
Length: 3.9k
This work, all my works, and my entire blog are 18+ Only
Warnings: Female Reader with a Callsign and Family, but no Physical Description or Name; Not Necessarily Healthy Decisions/Coping Mechanisms; Slow Burn; Coworkers to Friends to Lovers; Oblivious Idiots; Excessive Pining; Jealousy; Adult Situations
Summary: Phoenix takes Dove out for a girls' day. Jake proceeds to lose his shit.
Part 1 Part 2 Part 3
Master List
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“You’re not doing anything with Dove today?” Coyote asked Jake as they jogged their normal route. 
“No, she said that Phoenix was taking her out.” 
“What’re they doing?” 
“I don’t know. Dove didn’t say,” Jake stated, shrugging his shoulders. 
~~~~~
# 44 - Gotten a Pedicure
“So, what are we doing next?” Dove asked Phoenix.
They sat side by side at a nail salon, getting a pedicure together. And Dove, even though salons usually gave her anxiety, was enjoying herself. It helped to have Phoenix with her. 
“I thought we’d start small and work our way up,” Phoenix replied, turning to Dove. 
“Like what?”
“We’ll just have a girls day. Do stuff that you wouldn’t do if Hangman was with you,” Phoenix stated, causing Dove to nod. “Maybe stuff that you’ve wanted to do for a while, but just never got around to doing.” 
“I can think of a few things.” 
~~~~~
# 45 - Bought Fishnet Stockings
“I don’t know what I’ll wear these with,” Dove admitted as she picked out a pair of fishnet stockings from the rack. “But I’ve always wanted a pair.” 
“And that’s why we’re doing this,” Phoenix stated, steering Dove towards the cashier. 
~~~~~
# 46 - Gone Wedding Dress Shopping 
“Nat, I feel bad,” Dove whispered to Phoenix as they looked through the racks of dresses. “There’s actual brides here.” 
“So what? Just pick some dresses. You’re not hurting anyone.”
As Dove continued to browse through the dresses, a consultant approached them. She greeted them kindly and Dove tried to not sweat when she was confronted with the fact that she was not engaged and she was here with a fake engagement ring and a made up fiance. 
“So, you’re the bride to be?” the consultant asked Dove, who smiled sheepishly.
“Yes, I am.” 
“When’s your wedding?”
“Next summer,” Dove stated noncommittally. 
“Oh, so you have time. Tell me what you’re looking for.” 
Dove listed off some details that she had considered for her actual wedding dress. With those details in mind, the consultant led Dove and Phoenix around the store, picking out some dresses and asking Dove about her fake wedding. Phoenix was calm beside her but Dove was not similarly relaxed. 
“So, tell me about your groom,” the consultant stated, causing Dove to sweat some more. “Do you have any pictures of the two of you?” 
“Uh, yeah, of course, I do,” Dove laughed nervously. 
Shooting Phoenix a look, Dove pulled out her phone. The photo of her and Jake from when they were stuck up on the ferris wheel together the night before popped up first and Dove showed it to the consultant to get it over with. 
“Oh, you two are adorable together.” 
“Thank you.” 
“What’s his name?”
“Jake,” Dove answered honestly. Because it was Jake in the photo.
“And how’d you two meet?” 
“We work together.” 
“And how long have you been together for?” 
“Eight months,” Dove lied easily. 
Dove had been at her position at NAS North Island for eight months. It had been eight months since she had been assigned to the Dagger Squad. 
“I know it seems rushed, but—” Dove started to over-explain. 
“—When you know, you know,” the consultant assured Dove, smiling kindly. She lifted up the wedding dresses that they had already picked out. “I’ll go put these in a dressing room. Come back after you’ve done your last look through.” 
“Thank you.” 
The consultant walked away, leaving Dove and Phoenix alone for a moment. Dove could feel Phoenix’s gaze on her, but didn’t meet her stare. 
“Freudian slip?” Phoenix suggested to Dove. 
“Shut up.” 
~~~~~
# 47 - Gone into a Lingerie Store
“I already hate this and we’re only in the parking lot,” Dove sighed, staring up at the store.
“Why?”
“Because the women who work in these stores are the most judgmental, aggressive, and condescending salespeople on the planet,” Dove huffed, turning to Phoenix with an annoyed expression. “Why do you think I stay away from these places?”
“If they act that way, we’re going to tell them to mind their business. Now, come on.” 
Dove sighed, but got out of the car anyway. She followed Phoenix into the store and was relieved to find that it was not overrun with judgy salespeople. Then again it was midday on a weekday and there appeared to only be two salespeople in the entire store. 
“You’ll be fine,” Phoenix repeated, before dragging Dove deeper into the store.
~~~~~
Jake sat around with the other Daggers—minus Phoenix—for a lazy afternoon, floating around ideas for that night. Jake, bored with the conversation already, pulled out his phone and looked at Dove’s list for any updates. 
Pedicure . . . fishnets . . . wedding dress . . . lingerie?
Quickly setting his phone back down, Jake turned back to the conversation, trying and failing at looking casual. And to not let his mind wander too far. 
~~~~~
# 48 - Bought Lingerie
“Buy for yourself, not for anyone else. Buy something that makes you feel good.” 
“I’m just looking for something that I can actually get into at this point,” Dove replied, grimacing as she picked up another set. “I mean, what is the point of all of these ribbons? I feel like I’m going to trip and slam my head into the wall trying to get into this thing.” 
“Just find something that works for you. Don’t worry about all of this extra crap.”
Dove looked through what felt like half a store’s worth of options before she settled on a simpler set. Nothing too crazy, but the lace pattern was appealing and it was surprisingly soft. And the look of the bra alone made her feel confident about herself. 
If only she had something or someone to wear it for.
~~~~~
# 49  - Gone to an Adult Shop
“Come on, it’s no big deal,” Phoenix stated, pulling Dove into the store. “You already bought lingerie. This is just another step in that process.” 
Dove winced when she saw some of the items that were up on the wall. She turned back to Phoenix, practically clutching her metaphorical pearls.
“Where the hell is that supposed to go?” Dove glanced down at her pelvis before turning back to Phoenix with a slightly terrified expression. “I don’t have space for that! No one has space for that. Where the hell are your organs supposed to go?” 
“We’re not going for anything crazy,” Phoenix stated reassuringly. “Just trying to introduce you to some stuff to, uh, help you out a little.” 
~~~~~
# 50 - Bought an Adult Toy
“This one has plenty of different settings, so you can play around with it and see what works for you and what doesn’t,” the attendant explained, causing Dove to nod. “Everyone is different, so there’s no shame in finding what works for you.” 
“Thank you.” 
“See that wasn’t so bad,” Phoenix stated, walking with Dove after she picked up a box.  
“No, it actually wasn’t.” 
Dove was about to turn for the register when she caught sight of some handcuffs. The dainty, fluffy pink fur didn’t spark any interest in her. But when she found a more industrial pair, Dove couldn’t help but pick up a pair to inspect. She completely missed the look on Phoenix’s face at her choice. 
“Well, I guess it’s on sale,” Dove reasoned to herself. 
After a few more moments of quiet deliberation, Dove shrugged her shoulders and walked towards the counter with the handcuffs in hand. Phoenix stood there for a moment, still shocked at Dove’s choice. 
“It’s always the quiet ones.” 
After Dove paid for her items, they made their way back out to the car. Looking down at what she had already purchased that day, Dove quietly had a discussion with herself before turning back to Phoenix. 
“I have an idea. For what to do next.” 
“Of course. What is it?”
~~~~~
# 51 - Gotten a Tattoo
Phoenix pulled her phone out as Dove laid on her side, talking casually with the tattoo artist. When she saw that Jake was calling her, Phoenix excused herself from Dove’s side. Walking out to the parking lot, Phoenix answered the call.
“Yes?” 
“What the hell are you doing, Trace!?” 
“Start over, Bagman,” Phoenix warned him. 
“You’re making her get a tattoo?” Jake rephrased, though the tension was clear in his tone.
“I didn’t make her get a tattoo. This was her idea.” 
“You think that I believe you?” 
“I don’t care what you believe. It’s the truth. She said that she’s floated the idea of getting one for a while and she decided to finally do it.” 
“And you let her?” 
“She is an adult. She can make her own choices about her own body. And no one has the right to tell her that she can’t,” Phoenix warned him. “Including you, Bagman.” 
“What if she regrets it?” 
“She can get it lasered off. And we all know that Dove doesn’t do anything without going through the consequences a thousand times.” Glancing back at the tattoo parlor, Phoenix added, “And when she tells you about it—and this goes for all of you idiots—you’re going to tell her that it’s great. Got it?” 
Dove stepped out into the light as Phoenix wrapped up her phone call. Phoenix spotted her and hung up the phone without so much as a goodbye.
“How do you feel?” 
“It stings,” Dove admitted honestly, pulling her shorts down a little to show Phoenix the bandage, “but I feel . . . I don’t know how to describe it. Just . . . free.” 
“You are,” Phoenix stated, smiling proudly. “You’re in charge of your life. No one else.” 
“Yeah, I am,” Dove agreed, nodding with a wide smile. 
~~~~~
# 52 - Sang Karaoke in Front of Strangers
“And girls! They wanna have fu-un! Oh, girls just wanna have—that’s all the really wa-ah-an-ah-an-ah-ant! Some fu-uh-uh-uh-un! When the working day is done, oh girls, they wanna have fun!” 
Phoenix and Dove shared a laugh as the song finished up. The bar where they were standing was pretty much empty, but the one bartender on duty clapped for them. Dove laughed and waved to them as she hopped off the small stage.
~~~~~
# 53 - Sunbathed Topless
“I need to get softer beach towels,” Dove commented, causing Phoenix to pick her head up and look over at her. 
“Are you planning on doing this more often?” 
The two of them were out in Penny’s backyard to sunbathe in the afternoon. Dove shrugged her shoulders as she laid on her stomach, calm and relaxed. 
“Maybe. If I find safe spots to do it.” 
~~~~~
# 54 - Dyed Your Hair
Putting a trash bag over Dove’s torso just in case, Phoenix started lightly spraying the dye onto her hair. Dove closed her eyes and just let Phoenix work, and missed Phoenix’s concerned look as she finished up the spray. 
“Alright, how does that look? I think I’ll open the window.” 
Dove stood up from the tub and walked over to the mirror to stare at her new reflection and instantly grimaced. The red hair color was fairly bright. It wasn’t quite a fire engine red, nor was it orange, it was some other odd reddish color that Dove was going to immediately wash out of her hair. 
“Well, that’s off the list. Forever.” 
~~~~~
# 55 - Drank Pickle Juice
“Do you normally do this?” Dove asked Phoenix, sitting at her kitchen table with an old towel wrapped around her freshly washed hair. 
The spray on hair dye had come out easily, but she was going to have to scrub her shower later. Phoenix placed a glass in front of her and Dove picked it up to inspect it. Taking a small sip, Dove wrinkled her nose and slowly set it back down. 
“I think I’ve had enough of the food challenges,” Dove admitted, slowly opening her eyes. 
“You’ll have to tell everyone else that. They want to go to a new bar tonight,” Phoenix stated, showing Dove her texts with Bob. 
“A cowboy bar?” Dove read, looking up at Phoenix. “They finally let Jake have his way?” 
“Apparently.” 
~~~~~
# 56 - Ridden a Mechanical Bull
Jake and Coyote walked into the cowboy bar together and started their search for the other Daggers, who had all apparently arrived before them. 
“Found ‘em,” Coyote stated, nudging Jake in the side. 
Jake turned his head and recognized the woman climbing up on the back of the mechanical bull. And even if he didn’t, the fact that Phoenix, Bob, and Rooster were standing around the area and cheering her on would have cleared it up.
Dove focused on the task at hand, locking her legs around the bull and prepared to move her body in time with the bull. Jake and Javy made their way over to the area as the mechanical bull started to move. 
“Yeah, Dove!” Phoenix cheered for her.
“She can really move her hips well,” Rooster commented, staring down Jake as he spoke. “Don’t you agree, Hangman?” 
Jake glared straight into Bradley’s soul before turning back to Dove. She managed to hold on for longer than anyone expected, but with a quiet giggle, Dove dropped onto the mat. Rolling onto her knees, Dove crawled to get off the mat. 
Jake offered her a hand and she took it without hesitation. Hopping down from the mat, she moved to pull her boots on again as Bob climbed up onto the mat to go next. Dove stood up slowly, offering him a smile that seemed to make time slow around them.
“Long time no see,” Dove stated teasingly. “Did you miss me?” 
“Well, my day was a lot less entertaining without you in it,” Jake commented, causing Dove to raise an eyebrow. 
“What’s that supposed to mean?” 
“You make life . . . interesting,” Jake replied, missing the side eye that Coyote and Rooster shared behind him. 
“Interesting?” Dove repeated, causing Jake to wince. Laughing, she nudged him again. “I’m just teasing, Jake. Lighten up. Relax. Have a drink.” 
She walked past him, practically serene, and over to where Phoenix was standing, cheering on Bob, who was still hanging on. Coyote wrapped an arm around Jake’s shoulder and Jake promptly ignored his shit-eating grin.
“You know, of all the words you could have used to describe her, you chose ‘interesting’?” 
“Shut up, Javy.” 
“To think I took advice from you. No wonder I don’t have a girlfriend.” 
~~~~~
# 57 - Given a Fake Name
Dove stood at the bar with Phoenix, waiting to order another drink. The other Daggers were waiting at their table, which they could see from the bar. Folding her arms on the bar, Dove glanced to her right as a man took the spot next to her.
“Have you been waiting a while?” he asked, causing Dove and Phoenix to turn to him. 
“Yeah, but they’re clearly understaffed, so we don’t mind,” Dove returned politely. 
“Have you been here before?” the man continued. 
“No, it was recommended by one of our friends,” Dove explained calmly. She shared a look with Phoenix, who subtly shrugged her shoulders. 
“And what do you think about it so far?” 
“The mechanical bull is a unique touch.”  
“Have you been on it yet?” the man asked, leaning on the bar with a smile. 
“Yeah, earlier.” 
“How’d you do?” 
“I think they said nine seconds.” 
“That’s amazing for your first time up on one.” 
“Thank you.” 
“I’m Jared,” he introduced, offering his hand for her to shake. 
Dove quickly came up with a fake name and introduced herself back to him. Shaking his hand in return, she turned back to the bartender. She and Phoenix shared a side glance before Jared asked her another question. 
~~~~~
# 58 - Been Bought a Drink
Jake glared at the back of Jared’s head, watching the interaction between Dove and the stranger intently. It was a bar and Jared was a random man who walked up to Dove and Phoenix. Jake had every right to be concerned, he reasoned to himself. 
“I’m going up there,” Jake stated gruffly.
“Did he do something?” Payback asked, turning around to look at the bar. 
“He’s loitering.” 
“It looks like they’re just talking. Dove doesn’t even look anxious.” 
“No, he’s bad news,” Jake insisted. 
“Because he’s doing something wrong or because he’s flirting with Dove?” Coyote questioned, turning to his best friend. “Would you react the same way if he was showing more of an interest in Phoenix?” 
“I’m going up there,” Jake insisted, ignoring Javy’s question. 
Meanwhile, at the bar, Dove and Jared had finally waved over the bartender. Dove ordered her drink, but before she could hand over her card, Jared offered to put it on his tab. And even though Dove insisted that she could pay for her own drinks, Jared insisted. 
“My treat. And besides, it’s your first time here. I have to make sure that you have a good time, so you’ll come back again.” 
“Thank you,” Dove replied quietly, quickly moving into unfamiliar territory. 
While they waited for their drinks to be made, Jared continued to ask Dove perfectly normal surface level questions. Dove was analytical by nature and Jared didn’t seem to ask her anything that was a blatant red flag. But she was still cautious. The bartender handed over their drinks before Dove turned back to Jared. 
“Thank you for the drink, but we really should get back to our friends,” Dove stated politely, offering Jared a small smile. 
“Before you go,” Jared stated, causing Dove to pause, “do you think that I could get your number? Or maybe, at least, a dance?”
“Um,” Dove began, trying to find the right words. 
“She has a boyfriend,” Phoenix interjected, causing Jared’s face to fall. 
“Oh.” 
“Sorry, I was trying to tell you before you bought the drink,” Dove replied, half-lying, half-telling the truth. She did tell him that she wanted to pay for her own drink. 
“Do you guys need help?” Jake asked, appearing from the crowd. 
Phoenix rolled her eyes at the subtle territorial display—or not so subtle, depending on who you asked—that Jake put on. Jared, quickly assessing the fact that Jake was built enough to kick his ass if he really wanted to—and Jake looked like he wanted to—slipped away, leaving Dove and Phoenix at the bar with Jake. 
“Are you alright?” Jake asked Dove, who nodded in return.
“Yeah, he seemed harmless. We’re fine.” 
“You’re sure?” 
“I’m fine, Jake.” 
“I’ll take a tequila shot,” Phoenix told the bartender, who nodded and moved to pour one for her. 
~~~~~
# 59 - Danced with Someone at a Bar
“I love this song!” Phoenix yelled, getting to her feet. 
The Dagger Squad had settled around their table, enjoying their drinks and catching up, but Phoenix was itching to move. Phoenix reached over and grabbed Bob’s arm, practically pulling him straight out of his seat. 
“Let’s go dance!”
Jake watched Phoenix drag Bob off her before turning to look at Dove, who was already staring back at him. Turning so that his whole body was facing her, Jake leaned in closer to her so that he didn’t need to scream over the music.
“Do you want to dance too?” 
“Do you want me to make your night more interesting?” Dove quipped back, though she looked unsure of herself. “You know that I have two left feet, Jake.” 
“I’ll lead.” 
“If I fall on my face—” 
“—I won’t let you fall,” Jake promised, causing Dove to pause as her cheeks warmed.
“Alright.” 
Jake and Dove left the Dagger table and walked out onto the crowded dance floor. Dove reached out and kept a tight hold on Jake’s hand, worried about losing him in the swarm. Jake managed to find a space for them before turning back to Dove. She released his hand and smiled anxiously.
“Just follow me,” Jake called over the music. 
Dove nodded and just sort of swayed to the music. The crowd shifted around them and pushed them closer together. Jake put his hands on Dove’s waist to keep her steady on her feet. And Dove, either subconsciously or consciously leaned against him too, letting Jake wrap an arm around her. 
They swayed together to the music as Jake reached for Dove’s hand. Twirling her around gently, Jake wasn’t aware that he was giving her the most genuinely joyful smile and that his eyes never once deviated from her. 
From the way that her nose crinkled as she laughed to the soft look in her eye as she turned back around, he was entirely and completely captivated by her. 
Dove spun around again and laughed as she leaned against Jake, still a bit clumsy. Jake wrapped an arm around her waist, not just to steady her this time. But to unabashedly keep her close to him. And Dove didn’t push away from him.
From across the room, Coyote, Rooster, and Payback sat together, all quietly watching the interaction between Jake and Dove. Coyote appeared tired, not from the night or the alcohol. But from watching Hangman and Dove continue to tiptoe around each other. 
“Have we tried just pushing their heads together yet?” Payback asked, taking a sip of his beer.
“I’m really considering it,” Coyote replied, shaking his head.
“I can flirt with Dove some more,” Rooster offered, causing Payback and Coyote to turn to him. 
“I’m honestly worried he’ll rip your head off at this point,” Coyote stated, turning to Rooster. “He turns almost feral.” 
“I know. But I’m really enjoying pissing him off.”
~~~~~
# 60 - Shown Someone Else Your Tattoo
Standing outside the bar beside Jake’s truck, Dove turned around. She had to unbutton her jean shorts to do it, but she pulled the waistband of her shorts and her underwear down a little to show Jake her tattoo. She had placed a protective clear patch over it for her shower and just decided to wear it to the bar as well. 
“It’s not very large, but I’ve wanted it for a while,” she explained, causing Jake to nod. 
“What made you pick that one?” 
“I was always drawing stars when I was anxious when I was in college,” Dove admitted, glancing back at her tattoo. “And this was just a group of them.”  
“It looks good,” Jake complimented Dove, causing her to smile. 
“Thank you. I’m really glad that I got it, actually.” 
“It suits you.” 
Pulling her shorts up and buttoning them once again, Dove turned around to face Jake. She leaned back against his truck, folding her hands behind her back.
“Are you excited for the team trip?” 
“I guess.” 
“You’re the one who voted for the lake house,” Dove reminded him.
“I just didn’t want to go to Vegas.” Shifting his weight on his feet, Jake met Dove’s gaze once again. “But I was thinking . . .” 
“Yeah?” Dove asked softly.
“Did you want to leave maybe two days before everyone else? There’s a few more things I think that we can knock off the list if we do.” 
“Just the two of us?” 
“I mean . . . yeah.” 
“I’m just teasing you, Jake,” Dove mused, pushing off of his truck. “Just tell me when I need to be ready to leave, and I’ll be ready.” Offering him a soft smile and letting her touch on his arm linger, Dove added, “Goodnight, Jake.” 
“Night, Dove.” 
Jake turned and watched Dove walk over to her car. He stood there until Dove got into her car and drove home, trying to keep his mind focused. But that was becoming more and more difficult around Dove these days.
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st4rd0lly · 1 month
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𝐖𝐎𝐍’𝐓 𝐁𝐈𝐓𝐄 !
𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘱𝘭𝘢𝘯𝘯𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘣𝘦 𝘢 𝘴𝘮𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘪𝘭𝘺 𝘪𝘯𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘥 𝘣𝘺 @/𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘬𝘰𝘭𝘺𝘢 ’𝘴 𝘥𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘰𝘳 𝘈𝘜 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘕𝘪𝘬𝘰𝘭𝘢𝘪 !! 𝘱𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘦 𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘤𝘬 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘪𝘳 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘬, 𝘵𝘩𝘦𝘺’𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘯 𝘢𝘮𝘢𝘻𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘸𝘳𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘳 <3 
@doukeshi-kun
cw : no smut just yet , MDNI still , slight implications of future dark content , reader is an adult in early 20s while nikolai is older , fem reader
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A young rising star actress, gaining more and more popularity within each film you star in.
That was you.
And unfortunately for you, you had a very big director with his eyes glued to every move you make. Nikolai Gogol was a very prominent actor and director, he’s been in the business for a long time and he’s good at it. Almost too good.
There’s a lot of mysteries, rumors, more surrounding the man in general despite him being there for so long. Not much is known about his personal life or how he started to rise up. Most of the public just knew that he started off as a child actor.
There’s almost an aura of weariness that people get around him, but his charismatic and mischievous nature keeps pulling them back in for more despite their gut. When he walks, the people shifts and the mood becomes a tide dependent on him due to the air he brings. He knows how to perform and then perform, even when he’s not on the job.
It was only natural that he gained interest in a new star, he was a director after all. That was what most people told you. But there was just something off about him to you, though you never had an actual full conversation with the man besides…
-
“Haha, isn’t it my lucky day! An amazing actress with more amazing work, lovely meeting you.” The man stood before you, giving a small grin before shaking your hand. You’d smile back at him, shaking his hand too.
“Pleasure to meet you Gogol.” You said, your voice firm but sounding polite and friendly. He was a very attractive man, that you couldn’t deny. He was tall, he had pale skin, and pretty white, fluffy hair that was tied in its usual braid. His eyes were something that were easy to get lost into, a green that’s rich like emerald and a shade of a blue that paints the sky. 
Not to mention, the scar that sits on top with a nicely put together outfit. The red tint of his lips made a nice contrast and you couldn’t help but feel a slight dread to hear him speak again for some reason.
“Oh please dear, do call me Nikolai. No need for last names.” He reassures, the smile on his face grew wider, letting out a small chuckle. You felt your chest tighten. Did everyone feel so off when talking to him? 
“Director!”
“Ah, I have to get going. I’ll see you around yeah darl?”
“Of course.”
-
And that was the last you’ve talked to him. It was a while ago, back at an event for god knows what. You’d been to too many for your liking. You still remember the moments where he was glancing at you ever so subtly. 
But now your team came to you with an opportunity, an opportunity to act with him.
-
“It’s a really good chance for you to really get out there. Gogol is one of the best, he’s directing and acting and! He’ll be a great guidance.” Your manager told you, you nodded your head but pursed your lips into a thin line in thought. 
“I don’t know…” You sighed, bouncing your knee while you sat. 
“You’re already gaining a lot of popularity, a boost wouldn’t hurt. You’ve got great skills and a good mindset. You mind if I ask why you’re hesitating?” 
‘Because he’s off! There’s something off about him!’
“Guess I’m just… a little intimidated is all. Don’t get me wrong, I know this is pretty rare for newbies to get invited into such a huge project by someone like him. But I just—”
“He’s been one of your supporters since the start, it’s a good thing he’s interested in you. I get it, it might be overwhelming but that’s just how the industry is. —With that being said, it’s still ultimately your choice.”
You bit your inner cheek. It would be rude to decline an offer from a big shot like him, especially when he’s been supporting your work you figured. And it doesn’t hurt to be curious about him too, only way to figure out more about him is…
“Let him know I accept then.”
‘We’ll see how this goes.’
-
The past few days working with Nikolai, your co-stars, and staff have all went well so far. Your manager was right, so far at least. You were still somewhat skeptical. He was great at guiding people in the right direction. Not only was he easy to talk to but he was friendly, very friendly. 
Almost a little too friendly to you, but you shrugged it off. It must because you’re still somewhat new to the acting scene. You still weren’t sure how to feel.
“Hey darl, how’s my favorite star holding up?” Nikolai’s cheery voice snapped you out of your thoughts, his hand placed on the low of your back. You didn’t think much of it and you smiled at him politely.
“A bit tired but nothing I can’t handle. I’m excited to run upcoming scenes.” You told him, eating a strawberry that they had out on the food table for lunch. You managed to grab a few before they ran out. Your manager always told you it wasn’t good to act with completely empty stomach. He let out a small chuckled, nodding his head.
“Yes, yes! I’m glad you’re having fun dear.” He grinned, but then his eyes trailed to your lips. “Are the strawberries sweet?” He asked, keeping the cheerful expression on his face.
“Yeah, they’re sweeter than I expected. I really like these.” You responded genuinely, grabbing another one. 
“Let me have a taste.” He said, leaning down and eating the strawberry from your hand to his mouth. You were surprised, not expecting him to do something like that so casually. 
‘He smells sweet.’
‘….And his hands are really nice.’
You looked at him still with a surprised expression, letting out a small laugh when you saw his focused face on tasting the the strawberry. You were aware he was probably doing this to make you feel more comfortable and light hearted. At least that’s what you thought to make of his actions.
‘Wait, did I just say he smells sweet? In my head?’
“Yes—”
“Huh?” You cut him off, snapping out of your head. Worried that you had said your thoughts out loud, you turn your face to his more directly. He raises a brow at you, an amused look on his face.
“I was about to say, yes you are right. They are pretty sweet but it looks like you have something on your mind honey.” He tells you, nothing ever goes unnoticed by him.
“O-Oh! It’s nothing, sorry I was just thinking about something random.” You try to explain, there’s no way you’re going to explain what you thought about him to him. That was weird. He’s weird… okay but maybe you’re weird too for thinking that of him-
“You always look so tense around me darling, you always have something on your mind don’t you?” He chuckles. “Dim your worried thoughts pretty thing. I’m not gonna bite you.” 
…Okay yeah he is weird.
But for some reason, your cheeks feel like they were growing warmer. 
“Unless you want me too.”
You didn’t quite catch what he said that moment, so now it was your turn to look at him a little amused snd confused. 
“What was that?”
“Oh nothing nothing dear!” He rubs the inner of your wrist quickly with his thumb, standing back up straight and patting you on the back. He let out a small light hearted laugh. “Oh you’re so cute. Relax okay? This is your first time working with a huge director isn’t it? —Ah maybe that sounds too arrogant of me. I’m just rather familiar with the position is all.” 
“Y-Yeah it is, you know just wanna do my best.” You stammer a bit, nodding your head in agreement.
“You’re already doing so good for me sweetheart, you’re gonna be just fine.” He reassures you, he was a little too good at eye contact. “Actually, you know what? Say, are you free after the shoot?”
You blink.
Where did this come from? What did he plan to do? Why was he asking? You had to come up with an answer. Quick. There wasn’t any time to think-
“Uh, you know I think I am? I don’t usually have anything planned after shoots.”
‘Fuck. What was that?’ 
You internally started cursing at yourself. You initially planned to deny, a thing your gut was screaming at you to do. But you couldn’t think right when he looked at you. It almost seemed sly in the way he smirked.
“How about this? After this shoot is done, go home and get dressed. Come over to my place for dinner yeah darl? I’ll give you some advice, I would just tell you now but we have to run the next scene in about 30? And I don’t wanna stay at the studio much longer after. What do you say?” He asks, tilting his head ever so slightly.
‘There’s no backing out now..’
“Sure, that sounds good to me.” You gave him a sheepish smile. A grin was too swift to grow on his face before relaxing into a casual smile. He reached for his phone, it was different from the usual phone he uses. It must’ve been a personal phone. You figured you should grab your own too.
“Here you go.” He says, handing you his phone and swapping with you. You both take a few moments to put in your numbers and for some reason, you feel as if you’ve greatly messed up. You both swapped the phones back. “There’s my number, give me a call before you’re on your way dear.”
“Okay, I will. Thank you.” You told him, now somewhat nervous to look up at him again.
“Gogol! Makeup touch ups!” A staff called out for him, your makeup artist was also probably looking for you.
“I’ll be seeing you later.” He winks at you, walking away. You let out a small laugh, nervous. You finished the strawberry off quickly, tossing it into the trash before walking off to find your makeup artist.
This is too weird.
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dividers : @/cafekitsune
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veethefreeelf · 7 months
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Hello, I was wondering if I could make a request for jeonghannie 😢😢, how would he react to seeing you breastfeed your baby in front of him? And then he just wants to have sex and suck your tits like the baby 😢😢
Sorry Anon for 2 things. One, I took forever with this request and two, I might have gotten carried away (2.5K words, yikes). Anyway hope you enjoy it ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ Also big thanks to @leejihoonownsmyheart for giving me the courage to post this CHEERS 🥂
You’ve always wondered if you would be a good mother. Not because your childhood was bad, but because you never saw yourself as such a figure in anyone’s life. You were always the baby of all your friend groups and it took you quite some time to consider yourself an actual adult and not just an overgrown kid. 
Now, looking at the little angel in your arms, you find yourself wondering how you could ever have had such a thought. Sure, she just barely came out of you but overall, things have been pretty smooth. You have the instincts down but what you have better than anything else is the person whose eyes are looking at you two with so much adoration that you could just crumble right then and there.
“Well… Are you just going to sit there and stare at us?” you asked teasingly.
“If I could help I would angel, but pretty sure breastfeeding is going to be an ‘only you’ task” he said as he smirked. You smiled at each other and as you continued feeding your little angel you looked back at your relationship with him.
Yoon Jeonghan. Before you met him, you never had been one to settle down. You had been in relationships sure, but nothing that had lasted more than 6 months max. You always ended up realizing the person in front of you just wasn’t your forever person and you had to move on. At one point, you even considered the fact that maybe you just weren’t built for love. Well, romantic love, you knew when it came to your friends and family, you loved fiercely and unconditionally, however, when it came to romantic relationships, things just… fizzled down and you always ended up realizing you had never felt true love before.
But boy did that all change when you met him. You were crazy about him from the very beginning and you tried to keep him away to try and protect your fragile heart. But he was having none of it and kept breaking through your walls with ease and he did it consistently and with purpose, because what you didn’t know was that he had been just as crazy for you as you were for him, since the very beginning. 
Five years later and looking at the little family you two have built, you find it funny how you could have ever had such ridiculous thoughts about yourself and how you could ever have doubted him. 
And, at this moment, after five years of knowing Jeonghan, he still manages to surprise you with the next sentence that comes out of his mouth while staring at his perfect girls. 
“So, baby, when is it my turn?” he asked with such a shit eating grin. You lifted your head and stared at him. His eyes had that familiar spark they usually have when he wants to absolutely wreck you, and he is darting his beautiful orbs between your eyes and your breasts where your baby girl is currently finishing up her meal. 
Once you realize what he means, you start laughing and ask him “Do I look like an open buffet to you, Yoon Jeonghan?”
“Hmm… You do look like a five-course meal, angel” he teases.
“Wow… That was incredibly cheesy even for you, Hannie. Oof… I think you might be losing your spice, baby” you teased.
“Losing my spice, huh? Well, we’ll just see about that later tonight won’t we, angel?” he said as he crossed the room to you.
He kissed you in your temple and held your baby girls’ hand and said “When she’s done with her dinner, I’ll get her to sleep, angel. You can go and do your night time routine, yeah? Look nice and pretty for me, hmm?”
You knew exactly what he meant and you swallowed hard. Maybe you shouldn’t have teased him before but also, who are you kidding? You want this as bad as he does.
Once your baby girl was done, he picked her up to have their own bonding time as he always puts it. Jeonghan is the proudest when it comes to bonding time with his daughter and he takes it very seriously. He always makes sure to be the one to get her to sleep and, on nights where he can’t be present, it always eats away at him and he feels incredibly guilty for missing out on his baby girl’s bedtime.
You go through your night routine (shower, lots of skincare, lots of hair care) and you are now standing in front of your closet wondering what kind of night this will be.
Is it a normal underwear kind of night? Is it a lingerie kind of night? Or maybe a Hannie shirt and nothing underneath kind of night? You choose the latter. From the look in his eyes earlier, this calls for the option that will make him the craziest for you, and he has always said, there’s nothing better in this world than looking at you wearing just his clothes and nothing else. A possessive little thing he is, but in the best of ways.
You go to bed waiting for him but you find yourself so tired that you start to doze off. Later, you wake up to his lips on you. He feels so warm and he is kissing you so delicately, you think you might still be dreaming.
“Sorry, angel. Baby girl took longer than usual to fall asleep. Hmm… I was just going to let you sleep but I got here and you’re in my shirt and smelling so heavenly, I couldn’t help myself” he said as he continued kissing down your neck and climbing on top of you. 
“Hannie…” you moaned.
“Yeah, angel. You want me to continue or you want me to let you sleep? Your choice, baby, but choose now before I go insane” he says leaning his forehead in yours.
“Want you, Hannie. Don’t stop, please” you whispered. 
He sat back on his knees and took his shirt off. You kept staring at him and wondering how you even got this fucking lucky. You’d have to pray to all the gods and the universe tomorrow.
“Angel, you can’t look at me like that. With those innocent eyes when I know that what’s going on behind them is not even close to being innocent”. 
You sit up and start kissing him. Properly, taking your time. It feels like ages ago since you last just sat and kissed like this. Deeply, so profound that you forget everything else around you. You then start kissing down his neck as he starts massaging your breasts. You stop for a bit and he senses your hesitation. 
“What do you think, angel? Is it my turn now?” he asks, looking you in the eyes as he keeps caressing your breast with one hand and holds your face with the other. 
“What… What if it… You know… Comes out?” you asked in such a low voice you almost sounded like a scared child. 
“Angel, you’re my wife. The mother of my child. You are my whole world. You have nothing to be embarrassed about. This is the most natural thing in the world and I want you so fucking bad. I want them” he says while massaging your breasts now with both hands.
“I want them so bad. I’ve tried hinting at it before but I didn’t know if you were ignoring it or if you weren’t getting the hint. But I want all of you. You know how sexy it is that you carried my child? That you brought our baby into this world? Fuck, everytime I think about it, it drives me fucking insane” he says while leaning his forehead in yours.
“Hmm… Mommy kink, Hannie?” you say, now smiling.
“More like a You kink, angel. Everything about You, always” and before you can tease him again about that line, he starts kissing you, taking your (well, his) shirt off of you and, in no time, you are in the position you were in when this all started.
He is kissing down your neck and his fingers are moving closer and closer to where you desperately want him to be. He kisses your chest, just below your collarbones and he starts running his fingers through your folds.
“Fuck… You are so wet, angel… It seems I’m not the only one wanting to try this huh?” he says in such a cocky way. You wish you had the strength to tease him back but you are getting way too desperate for his touch.
“It’s you, Hannie… The way you talk about me… About this… Fuck, please, keep going” you are now whining and getting more and more desperate.
As he starts slowly touching your clit, he moves his mouth and his free hand to your breasts. He quickly latches his mouth on one of your nipples and starts kissing it, devouring it. He’s making such sloppy noises, if it was anyone else in the world you would be so fucking embarrased but he keeps humming and moaning as he suckles and makes out with your tit.
You find yourself getting closer and closer, the fire in your core is igniting fast, too fast for your liking.
“Hannie. Hannie. I’m.. I’m close. Slow.. Slow down, please” you pant, barely making sense. He then pushes one finger… Then a second finger into your pussy and keeps reaching into that one spot inside you that makes your mind go completely blank.
“Shhh, let go, angel. Fuck, I can feel your cunt squeezing around my fingers, you’re dripping on me. Just let go, I got you” he whispers while still latched to your nipple and staring you in the eyes. 
He kept going, getting sloppier, getting louder and staring at you like you are the most precious piece of art. His fingers have set the right pace and he has his thumb circling your clit with just the right pressure. Everything sounds so filthy and it’s what pushes you over the edge with a moan of his name.
He helps you come down from your high and is now kissing you all over your face and whispering “good girl. You were so good for me. I love you so much”. When you are back down on earth, you start kissing him back and you can feel just how hard he is. It must be painful at this point. He’s practically humping you and moaning praises while kissing you. You reach down to palm him through his (still very on) pants and you start massaging his cock.
“Hannie… You’re so hard, baby. Get those clothes off and get inside me. I can’t wait anymore…” you whispered in his ear between kisses.
He groans and quickly strips down. He’s now sitting back on his heels in the bed with you between your legs and he pushes your legs open. As open as they can be and he starts staring at you while running his hand through your leg. He takes his other hand and starts stroking his cock while staring down at you.
“Fuck, angel. One of these days, you’ll kill me. Look at you, all fucked out from me sucking your tit and touching you. I’ve barely started with you and you’re already so wrecked” he keeps stroking himself and staring at you. You lick your lips and start pouting.
“Hannie… You can make yourself come on me any other day, but tonight, please, fuck me. I need you inside of me, so bad” you say in your best innocent voice that you know drives him crazy.
“You sure you’re ready for me, angel? Don’t want to overwhelm you” he says. Then two things run through your mind. One: he looks like he wants to fucking wreck you but he is still giving you the option to stop him since he knows that after the birth of your girl you both have been very careful and well, for lack of a better world, vanilla in bed due to doctor’s orders and some of your fears. And two: you are the luckiest woman alive.
“Please, Hannie. I’m ready, I’m so ready. I need you now. I need everything. I’ll give you everything” you moan while staring back at him so he knows that you fucking mean it.
He leans over you, kisses you deeply, tells you he loves you and starts rubbing the tip of his cock on your pussy. He holds your hand above your head and stares into your eyes as he pushes himself into you, finally. You’re both panting and giggling and kissing, like teenagers. 
At first, he starts slow. Long, well-timed strokes. Holding your hand and your hip in position, making sure your legs stay as open as possible for him.
“Faster, Hannie. I’m not gonna break. Please” you moan. 
“Hmm.. My angel wants to get fucked hard, huh? Seems like my angel is a little slut tonight, isn’t she?” he said as he started speeding up and fucking you harder and harder and you moan louder and louder.
He slaps your thigh. “I need words, slut. Fucking tell me what you want. Tell Hannie what you want”.
“Fuck… Hannie… I‘m a slut tonight. Your slut… Please…” you said, completely and already fucked out of your mind.
“Shit… That’s right… Mine… All fucking mine” he says and groans. He’s getting closer and so are you.
He removes your hand from his and grabs on to your tit while his other hand is now rubbing circles on your clit. He starts sucking on your tit that he overlooked earlier tonight and keeps massaging the other. He starts rubbing your nipple and making out with your other tit and nipple. Again, getting sloppy, making the most obscene sounds. 
He senses you’re close. He knows, he can tell by the way you are moaning, by the look in your eyes and by the way your pussy is squeezing his cock. He’s not going to last much longer either, not like this and he goes in for the kill.
“Is my angel close? I know you are, I can feel it. Fuck… I’m right behind you” he speeds up, latches back on to your nipple and for the final blow, he slightly bites down on it and that’s when everything erupts. You come with a cry of his name. You’re shaking and panting and he doesn’t think he’s ever seen anything so pure and beautiful.
He comes then with a groan and keeps whispering ‘I love you’ over and over again.
You just lay there together, you don’t know for how long. You’re holding him, one hand running through his hair and another running up and down his back. He lifts his head and looks at you. He then surprises you again with what comes out of his mouth.
“I knew you were gonna love that. You’re tits have always been so sensitive, specially your nipples, angel” he starts laughing against your neck.
“I guess it’s an open buffet after all” you said and you both burst into laughter still tangled together.
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