#and i taught myself the rest with the help of the internet and one of my friends

[idontliketomatoesleavemealone]

Genuine question, when did y’all learn about lgbtq+?

#i know that i learned that gay and lesbian are a thing when i was like 5 because my dad had this kinda thing on the door to his study #that thing said something along the lines of #rainbow families matter #and i understood that #and i learned about trans when i was 8 in autumn break #i was at my Oma’s place and reading in a parent magazine #and it had an article about transgender ppl #and i taught myself the rest with the help of the internet and one of my friends #id love to say that i turned out a perfectly „normal“ kid #but im gay so it might not be the best argument #oH nO tHaT PoStEr My DaD hAd TuRnEd Me GaY #lgbtq #gay #lesbian #trans #queer

[art]

Creator Spotlight: @k-eke

My name is Kévin, but everybody calls me Kéké! I’m a 2D animator and illustrator, mostly drawing little bouncy animals and sharing them on the internet. I like cartoons and storytelling, trying to create stories where people can find themselves in, also trying to go further and develop stories that are rare in media, such as LGBTQ+ content, for example. I try to keep up with my 3DS to create my work and see how far I can go with it!

Below is our full interview with Kévin!

How did you get your start in animation?

I started animation back on September 4th, 2009, this is when I discovered Flipnote Studio on the DSi for the first time. I did try to animate before but solely on paper, and I had no knowledge about the medium at all, so it was an amazing discovery. I later became self-taught and could keep going by myself.

What is one habit you find yourself doing a lot as a creator?

I feel the habit that talks the most to me as a creator is communication. I feel it’s important to communicate with your public and fans to keep them updated and knowing how things are moving. It’s getting overwhelming to me the more I grow because the community is massive. Still, I keep up, and I thank many people for always updating me when something wrong happens (thieves, plagiarism, etc., etc.).

From idea to final piece, how long does it take for you to create something?

It all depends on the idea and process of the creation. For example, if my idea is just to animate a cat bouncing, this might take me a few minutes. Otherwise, if I want to animate 50 pigeons bouncing, this will take me around 5 hours or more! In general, an animation takes me less than a day or more if I’m busy on the side and can’t advance as much as I wish I could.

Have you ever had an art block? If so, how did you overcome it?

Art blocks often happen. I take them as good to rest and do something else. It’s not a must to draw/animate all the time or too often, and when it happens, I take it easy and try to entertain myself and see when it will be back. Also, I scribble sometimes just to feel like I’m still drawing but not with a point to reach a certain idea, just to let my hand go and make something silly. The mood can come back faster this way!

How do you use Tumblr to further your creativity?

I love Tumblr for the fact you can post 10 illustrations/GIFs as one whole post. This is not possible on other websites I know, so that was great for me to be able to make a compilation of GIFs and post it all there in one shot. It was really helpful and also allowed me to make a few little stories with this opportunity.

What is the hardest part of your process?

The hardest part is drawing on a DSi, 3DS literally! It’s so limited, with few colors (4 or 6 depending on the version), 2 or 3 layers, no zoom, and no options to make camera moves …… but I still love it haha. I’m so used to it that those don’t annoy me anymore, I accepted them, and people admire my art for it (I think!)

Have you ever wanted to dive into another medium before?

I did. Now I use TVPaint and Flash, toon boom more often, but in the end, I still come back to Flipnote Studio because it’s my favorite tool and program.

Who on Tumblr inspires you and why?

So many inspire me it would be hard to choose! But I did love Sarah Andersen, Owlturd comics a lot, visually and the humor. Also, the use of Tumblr to post multiple pages at once: it inspired me to try it as well!

Thank you for stopping by, Kévin! Check out more of Kévin’s work over at @k-eke!

#creator spotlight #artists on tumblr #gif maker #k-eke

[episims]

A Peek to My SFS Stats

I know some creators prefer not seeing their download numbers and that's fair! This kind of stuff can easily cause pressure and/or feelings of underachievement.

For me though, it's just statistics. And since it's pretty precisely 5 years from when I first uploaded anything to SFS, I've gathered some data to play with.

So, this very self-indulgent post is solely about my SFS stats. Just because I'm a total nerd I find it interesting, and I like being open about things. It's long and blabbery so the rest is safely under the cut.

For the background: I tend to create whatever I need for my own game. I share my weird stuff because I feel like it's a trade for everything I download from others.

Probably due to the lack of any consistency or branding at all, my CC has a wide range in download numbers. I have some popular pieces, sure, but also some niche mods like no snow accumulation that has only interested 126 persons in nearly two years.

Even though saying "only 126" is an illusion created by the internet. Imagine if those 126 individuals would come to you in person. That's more people than I've probably even had a real talk with during the last year!

The raw data of my SFS main folder is (calculated with a sheets program): it has 227 files and the average download count for each file is 1557, but 74% of the files have been downloaded fewer times than the average.

So even though my CC isn't usually downloaded that much, I've shared a handful of things that have been downloaded so much more than everything else that they pull the average up.

What are those things? Time is an important factor here, as most CC tends to gather downloads over time (not a single post from 2023 on this list).

1) Subtle wrinkles (January 2022)

17313 downloads (674 hearts; ~3,9% of all downloaders) Post notes: 1112

That's several thousand more than the second most downloaded thing I have, and it's such a random thing.

I'm sure most people have downloaded them to get those 4t2(ish) forehead wrinkles. I have no other explanation as the rest of them are hand-drawn by a person who can't draw. Also the preview is frankly hideous, I used about one minute to take it... safe to say I didn't expect this post to gather any attention at all.

2) Cellphone default (January 2021)

13547 downloads (565 hearts; ~4,2% of all downloaders) Post notes: 1133

Noteworthy that it's been updated a couple of times which pushes people to redownload.

This was a quick passion project, since at that time I couldn't find a cellphone default I was completely happy with. If it hadn't been a quickie, I would've used more time to find a good base mesh oof. Many thanks to @pforestsims for later improving it.

3) Tombstone defaults (December 2019)

12477 downloads (582 hearts; ~4,7% of all downloaders) Post notes: 1064

I was so proud of these when I made them. Those were my first mesh defaults ever! Today, I'm proud of my past self for doing them. That's crazy many meshes and subsets to handle for a total noob.

I couldn't do anything with BHAVs back then, so those defaults would've never ever happened without @midgethetree. She endured a lot, working with a noob who went through several meltdowns because of subset issues that didn't make any sense.

4) Baby personality mod (February 2020)

9724 downloads (489 hearts; ~5% of all downloaders) Post notes: 1193

The first mod on the list! Absolutely essential one for myself and apparently for some others too.

Also the actual first mod of my own ever. I can't really recommend starting with something this complicated, I had zero ability to perceive the scope of the mod when I asked if @midgethetree was willing to help me through it. She deserves all the praise for doing it, I've realized later that I couldn't ever teach anyone the way she taught me. So, if you read this: thank you, Midge.

5) Rabbit pen default (August 2022)

9628 downloads (442 hearts; ~4,6% of all downloaders) Post notes: 1305

This was completely @deedee-sims' idea and project! I just hopped in (hah) to help. I'm only hosting it for practicality, as the BHAVs most often need updating, and those are by me.

6) Turn On/Off replacements (July 2021)

8644 downloads (388 hearts; ~4,5% of all downloaders) Post notes: 1470

This post has more notes than any other post of mine, yet it's not even nearly the most downloaded thing I've done. The two don't always go hand in hand.

I've also shared an updated version of these lately in a new post. It's unlikely they'll get the same amount of attention, which on paper doesn't make much sense since it's practically the same thing but done better. But I'm sure everyone knows that the hype and the quality don't always match.

7) Pixelry’s KKB fridge recolors (February 2022)

8147 downloads (329 hearts; ~4% of all downloaders) Post notes: 662

This is such an oddity on this list since it's the only recolor set and the post has fewer notes than the other ones, too. People just (secretly) really like cute fridges, apparently.

8) Crib teeth anim fix (August 2022)

6157 downloads (431 hearts; ~7% of all downloaders) Post notes: 1408

This list is already long enough, but I wanted to show how fast the number starts dropping at this point.

This got posted a day before the bunnies, and I find it funny to think that for about 3000 people it's more pressing to have bunnies in their game than fixing their toddlers dropping teeth while crying lol.

No point in continuing the list forever, but among my most note-gaining Tumblr posts are also:

Puppy/kitten want replacements (October 2022, 1114 notes, 3849 downloads)

Improved biotech station (July 2022, 1110 notes, 3893 downloads)

Camera overhaul mod (January 2024, 1059 notes, 1752 downloads)

Newspaper default (March 2022, 970 notes, 5052 downloads)

While I don't have a real conclusion to offer, it's clear that notes don't always get realized to downloads, and likewise many people download without interacting with posts.

One more thing I'd like to point out is that the percentage of people who hit that SFS heart button seems pretty constant. I feel like it shows that some people just have that habit and some don't, and it's not likely directly related to how much they like the thing.

The amount of SFS hearts that crib teeth anim fix has gotten doesn't follow this pattern lol. It's really not common to see the percentage change even that much.

#text #text post #random #nerdy stuff #this is what happens when i start typing without thinking #i end up with a novel #that probably interests no one lol

[randomartkid-12]

id love to hear your roy hcs :3

Alrighty!

• Roy has an adopted sister (Ruby) who was like his best friend growing up. He never talks about her much to the team though, since he’s usually not fond of talking about personal stuff.

• Helly taught him how to use the internet

• He has a secret hobby of art and animation. He has a small channel online where he shares his stuff. Only Poli knows about this.

• Roy is a REALLY good cook, and at that, one of the only rescue members that can cook. He likes to teach the others how to make some easier types of food, like pancakes, eggs, and so on. The team is always complimenting his cooking skills, which usually get him flustered.

• I like to imagine that Roy is a little OCD. He’s an extreme perfectionist and prefers to go by a schedule and can be thrown off by new things. He cleans the rescue center all of the time and feels like he has to fix any imperfections.

• Roy will eat literally anything. He’s actually a bit of a picket eater, but he eats stuff anyway because 1. Not to be rude 2. it’s probably good for him. 3. He loves to eat stuff. Sometimes his one braincell will make him eat inanimate objects as well.

• Roy is an insomniac. It’s not unusual for him to pull all-nighters. But by midday, he’s trying his hardest not to fall asleep.

• He has a minor allergy to some types of fur. He can’t have animals like cats or dogs around him for too long. Roy is often upset by this as he loves animals but can’t be around them without feeling like crap.

• Roy sees Helly as a younger brother, sometimes even getting him stuff and hanging out with him for long periods of time. He loves hanging with him and would protect him with his life!

• Because of his kind and somewhat gullible nature once you get to know him, Roy has gotten into some bad situations in the past, leaving some nasty mental scars. On high school he ended up getting stuck in a abusive relationship, which had a pretty bad impact on his mental health.

• Poli always helps when Roy is feeling down. He’s always there for him and hates to see him upset. Sometimes Roy wonders how he has such good friends as Poli and the rest of the team.

• Usually he tries to act brave and social around the townspeople and his friends, when in reality he’s actually rather shy. He overthinks all of the time and is a better listener if anything.

• Roy and Amber often bicker like siblings, they’ll occasionally fight before crawling back to each other after 30 minutes apologizing after tying to avoid one another. Same thing goes for Jin and Helly.

• When Roy was a really young child, he didn’t talk much or smile. The first time he smiled was when he was sat in the back of a fire truck with his mom and other firefighters. His mom literally cried over that.

• Roy is the bug killer of the house.

• Roy has a small fear of being around a lot of people or by himself.

Okay, I should probably stop myself before I go on forever. I just realized how many hcs I have for Roy. Hope you like them! I had some fun writing these :D

#robocar poli #rcp #robocarpoli #hc #my hcs #request #roy #reqs open #i loved writing this #ngl

[renlyslittlerose]

Hi! Your fics are absolutely stunning but I think your job sounds so incredibly cool! If you’re comfortable answering a slightly personal ask, how did you become an archivist? What drew you to that kind of work?

Thank you for your amazing contributions to the Obikin fandom ❤️

Oh gosh, thank you so much! You're too kind!!! 💗

And I don't mind at all! I actually stumbled into it (mostly) by accident. I was finishing up my double degree at university in the Classics and History when one of my professors said that a local private club (think 'White's' in London - elite, mostly rich members or literal royalty) was looking to take on an assistant to help their lead historian, and they wanted a student from the history department. I decided to apply and lo! I was hired.

So I learned a lot about the basics while working alongside their more experienced archivist and curator who, bless her, really wanted to help me along. She gave me lots of tips, taught me how to carry out the job, while also trying to guide me toward bigger things.

Meanwhile, while I was working that job at the club, I started volunteering at my local RCAF museum where I learned how to accession, archive material, preserve artefacts, etc. I actually networked with my current boss at a Renaissance Fair lol (my boss used to be a professional jouster, if you can believe it).

Then, a few months into my volunteer work with the RCAF museum, they asked if I would be willing to come work for them as an assistant curator. I of course jumped at the chance, and with the blessing of my boss at the club, I quit and moved on to the museum! While working at the museum I went on to receive my Masters in the Classics, while continuing my on-the-job education at the museum. Archival work sort of pivoted to me over the years, so now I split my time between digitizing our archival material, photographing the artefacts in our collections space, and transcribing letters, diaries, etc. While also still accepting and accessioning new donations and trying to find space for them in our very small area 😭

I think I was drawn to the work because it's a real and tangible way to work with history, and to distribute knowledge to the wider world. Working with history can sometimes feel like you're yelling into the void - no one hears you in amongst the rest of the voices. Or, those who do hear you are just part of your very insulare, often times elitist community. Post-secondary education and the trappings that come with such institutions are often times gated to those who don't have the money or the means to attend. Education at a higher level is a privilege rather than a right.

But when it comes to museum work, we get to share our work and our knowledge with the wider community - with those who live nearby, student groups from local schools, as well as with tourists. And the amazing thing about our archives is that they're available online for free. Anyone, anywhere in the world, so long as they have access to the internet can peruse our archives at their leisure. I have spent the last eight years digitizing our archives and putting them online for anyone to use. Our knowledge and the history that is contained within the walls of my office aren't just for me, or for those wealthy enough to access them. They are for everyone.

And I think that's really, really cool. And that is why I love my job.

In the next few years we're hoping to expand the archives to include photographs of our artefacts, so that the material we cannot put on display are still available for the public in some form. And again, these will all be available for free.

I would link to our archives but I don't wanna dox myself (which is a sad statement to make, but that's just how the internet is now a days). But maybe one day you'll accidentally stumble upon my handiwork out in the wild, and if you do I hope you enjoy photographs of airmen and women, ground crew, officers and NCOs, dogs and cats as airbase mascots, or a ventriloquist mummy made by a POW out of cigarette cases :)

#ask #reply #mercutiosdiary #sorry that went on for forever

[things-about-cars-in-posts]

favorite band/artist?

Sheesh. Complicated one.

You see, my music tastes are, to put it mildly, rather varied. I think it showed in my music recommendation post and the post that further explored one of those artists, but to further illustrate, my library includes:

Earth, Wind & Fire

New Kids On The Block's Jordan Knight's first solo single

Dubstep band Hadouken!’s Lana Del Rey cover

A mashup of Wham! and a fishing anime

A Japanese bilingual melodic punk rock band's two songs about bowling

80s remixes of Justin Bieber songs

A Japanese "punk ska and melodic hardcore band"'s cover of Scatman’s World

A 140+ song Beatles remix collection, featuring such gems as "Octopus's 3D Garden", "I Saw Her Yankin' There" and "Help!" (suspicious)

A eurobeat female duo of rotating Italian and British members’ Abracadabra-sampling track about falling in love with a banana

A remix of Azumanga Daioh’s Sata Andagi scene I retrieved from a porn site reupload

Moldovan folk punk band and folk musician duo’s collab about celebrating the reopening of a railroad

The soundtrack of Pictionary for the NES

A mashup of AVICII, Rick Astley and Chumbawumba

An 80s pop Linkin Park remix

Black Sabbath covers by The Cardigans (of Lovefool fame)

JT's solo debut

A Flock Of Seagulls (of I Ran (So Far Away) fame)

One (1) DJ Khaled song

A 2011 My Little Pony-themed song by then commentary youtuber

(And I beg each and every one of the people who read this list and thought "Okay that one cannot possibly be good" to hop in my askbox and allow me to prove them wrong.)

But let's go through bands and artists I've not posted about before.

Two Door Cinema Club Just out of statistics. I can prove I played I Can Talk over a hundred times and I can tell you any number under two hundred is underselling it. There is genuinely some problem with my brain that that intro slots into perfectly.

Oh also all the rest of their first album this comes from is this great too, and if you ask me what a perfect album sounds like I will tell you it's not that far off their second album.

OK Go Now, I like the music. Actually, I'd left my two guitars alone for years until an easy OK Go song made me think "Oh, maybe I can play this" and realize that rather than -as I had prior- just play the music I'd been taught I could actually teach myself to play the music I was listening to, which snowballed into playing more OK Go songs and then it expanded and now I have a ukulele, a bass, a third guitar I need to merge with that bass (it's complicated), a fourth "guitar" (it's complicated) on the way, a Casio calculator/synth (it's complicated), a melodica, a launchpad and a kazoo. Whoops. But really, all you need to be sold on OK Go is see two of their videos. One to find out what they're like (and you're already good on that front because you have visited the internet ever and have thus seen Here It Goes Again aka "The Treadmill Video" aka what when posted to YouTube upon its CEO begging them became the biggest video of all time) and another to find out that no the first one was not a one-off fluke. I am serious, go click that link, it takes you to a playlist of their videos and each one is crazier than the last. I mean they played a song with a car. A song. That has a guitar solo. With a car. Have you seen the name of this channel.

Ah, right, the name of this channel. I guess I have to say a thing about that car now. Uhhh this video was sponsored by Chevrolet to promote the Aveo which, despite being badged as a Chevrolet, like many of the more Europe-oriented Chevrolets was made by the automotive branch of Daewoo, brand General Motors picked up after the Daewoo conglomerate (then the second largest in South-Korea which may as well be called Samsungland) went bankrupt in '99 over almost $90B modern dollars in debt. Its founder Kim Woo-chong (because Lord knows the "woo" in Daewoo did not stand for "woo what a great car") earned a ten year sentence, but I feel they focused too much on the wrong guy. The REAL criminal is whoever penned Daewoo cars.

A good person doesn't do this on purpose.

Owl City I have too few of his songs, but I absolutely love how comically upbeat he is. He is so precious. If c: walked this Earth. I mean "Golf and alcohol don't mix and that's why I don't drink and drive / Because, good grief, I'd knock out my teeth and have to kiss my smile goodbye". Protect this man at all costs. Also one time I saw the Fireflies video after what must have been a good decade and you know when you feel near crying? I adored that song when I was a kid and I was right.

Liquido European one-hit wonders - and not even "people know them just for one song", not even "people don't know them and just know the song"; I found you can tell people the name of their hit and they won't know what you're talking about. But hum the riff and infallibly, invariably any single person in my country (and, in my limited experience, the rest of Europe) will go "Ooooooh, that one". And to be fair, those guys did stumble on one of the most memorable riffs in modern history.

Not saying this is a hidden gem of a band, I am sure some bigger music nerd would stamp a big fat "SEEN BEFORE" on all their stuff, beyond some enjoyable splashes of "I wonder how much of this is them leaning into it" cheese (yes, even more than that video) - but I've still got their whole discography including all the B-sides, because to me, so what? It's good music and I'll treat it like it. What's the point of praising "groundbreaking", "genre defining" works and then glossing over those inhabiting the ground they broke and making the genres they defined? When I eat bread I don't complain that it doesn't innovate or set itself apart from the rest of the genre, so as long as my music doesn't bore me why should those be problems there? I feel like people have a problem in general separating their enjoyment of a work from its artistic merit. I'm digressing.

The Beatles If you ask me "What's your favorite number of pant legs?" I'm not going to answer five because two would be cliché.

And now we get to the final answer, the real answer, in such a league of its own it deserves to be separated from the rest via a Read More.

I lied, this is under a Read More because it's an entire fucking dissertation. Your fault for asking.

Caparezza I've spent well over a decade of my life mulling over his lyrics to the point me and my ex-flatmate played this game where she told me a random word and I'd try to find it in his lyrics (e.g. the first word of your ask, "favorite", was used in the second verse of the sixteenth track of his sixth album, yes I am neurodivergent why do you ask), and still it happens that as I am going through my everyday life I happen to accrue some information and slam my forehead going "Oh my God THAT'S what he meant there". His songs are more layered, more deep, more thoughtful, more cutting, more witty, more clever than most prose you see around and still he manages to play with his words and rhymes with incredible dexterity.

Take his last record, Exuvia - actually, take the previous record Exuvia picks up from, Prisoner 709:

Its name not only introduces the theme of imprisonment, but also of dilemmas and juxtapositions, since the prisoner's number, 709, stands for the dilemma about the number of the record: it's the 7th in his discography as Caparezza, but the 9th if one also counts the two shit records he made under his previous name Mikimix (we don't talk about those). Its tracklist, indeed, while being as typical for him incredibly varied in topics (from religions to his affinity with Ludwig II of Bavaria to "I'm not [x], BUT-" types) is arranged as chapters of a journey through an imprisonment (The Crime, The Punishment, The Weight, The Psychologist, The Letter, The Visit, The Yard Time, The Torture, The Revolt, The Guard, The Infirmary, The Window, The Evasion, The Hiding) and associated to dilemmas - for instance, as the record is about his feeling imprisoned in his body and in his role, the first song -and first chapter, The Crime- is indeed Prosopagnosia (i.e. face blindness), a track about him no longer recognizing himself in the artistic reputation he built himself, with the dilemma being between "Michele", his name, and "Caparezza", his rap name. Oh, and if you also want a taste of the impressive wordplay, well, count the letters of those two names. Yep. Every single one of the 16 tracks is a dilemma is between a 7 letter word and a 9 letter word. Because of course it is.

So now, let's get to the last record, Exuvia.

Nah, the pop-up edition's cover fucks way harder.

That's more like it.

Exuvia is the exoskeletal remains left behind by ecdysozoans after ecdysis, i.e. when creatures like insects and crustaceans develop a new exoskeleton and crawl out of their old one, as this record starts from his escaping from the anguish compounded through all his previous records and through a deep analysis of his past, his self, his surroundings, his fate, condensing it all and moving on to a new self, a new birth, a new shell. (Understand how I feel when people say the greatest rapper of all time is one whose greatest record is called "Damn" because the songs made him go "Damn" and whose biggest song is "Biggie Smalls' Juicy but this time about me".)

Well, in the second track of it, about running away from the dire situation of hatred, decay and persecution described in the first track, he says, and I paraphrase,

I give it all up, I'm dying, I retreat - Caporetto plus Waterloo Dripping and smelling like my head was in a station's toilet- oh.

introducing the desperation and hopelessness of military defeats and immediately following it up with an image whose comedic nature makes a contrast so stark as to surprise even him while still, being a reference to the military's hazing and bullying, latching back to the line before. While the prose I represent it with is deliberately poor, the concept behind the words is brilliant enough that it would be a good line if it didn't rhyme at all. And yet the original lines rhyme for twenty syllables. TWENTY.

Thing is, you can be as clever as you want, but the underlying music, you know, it can't be clever, it can just be good or bad. One would think. And yet the music is not just good but full of clever, witty samples and ideas that don't just reinforce the track's mood but tie the instrumental inextricably into the lyrics' themes, like Larsen (the track about his tinnitus, which he calls by audio feedback's technical name of Larsen effect) using high-pitched synths and emphasizing cymbals, Prisoner 709's title track being 79bpm (I wager 709bpm was a bit non-doable), House Credibility's instrumental featuring intercom buzz and cowbells reminiscent of cookware, or, well, everything in Exuvia's second single. See, that song is about the choice he faces between the story of Beethoven, who despite all his challenges kept devoting himself to music until the day he died, or that of Mark Hollis, lead of Talk Talk, who despite all the fame peaced out to focus on his private life - and the entire instrumental is devoted to that concept: the verses' reference Für Elise, the chorus Such A Shame, and the bridge I Believe In You; and when you tun into the background choirs you find they are rhythmically repeating "I don't know".

You start to get a clue why there's three years between his records.

So if his songs are so fucking good, why is he not famous? Well, he is! Except for his first album which no one really noticed (fairly so in my opinion - while I like a few songs I feel he really got going in his second one), the following records did really well for someone with such dense content: his third record has been certified gold! And all the others platinum. Some twice. Never since the first one did a record of his peak under 5 in the charts, and he's got 8 gold singles, 3 platinums and a double platinum. And don't get me started on the shows.

(That's me in the background!) Hell, he's even been on the cover of Billboard! So why've you never heard of him? Well, see the word next to Billboard.

Yep. The man, Michele Salvemini, is an Italian born and raised and, like any proper Italian, doesn't speak a whole lot of English, so pretty much all the English you'll hear in his music are the handful of English features, like Michael Franti, DMC (!) and Spandau Ballet's Tony Hadley, with which he made a song about Italy's emigration crisis.

Emigration that is also internal, from the underdeveloped, falling aparty and criminality-run south of Italy to where all the industries are, the richer and we-pretend-it's-not-criminality-run north. And since he's from Apulia, Italy's heel (his rap name in fact means "curly head" in Apulian dialect), he's made a song about its woes too, featuring the music of the tarantella, Apulia's traditional dance. (I don't know why y'all add an A in front. It's fucking "Puglia", y'all.) Here's an imperfect translation with a couple of helpful explainers to the asterisked terms over in the video's description.

It depresses me every time I think about it that all the English speakers I know will never be able to fully appreciate his lyrical brilliance. But oh well. At least y'all can appreciate the music... so fuck it, have that song whose music I yapped about so much. You'll hear the choirs in the background say "non so" (I don't know)... and a bunch more Italian words (translated here for those on desktop who want to follow along).

Links in blue are posts of mine about the topic in question - if you liked this post, you might like those!

#does it show #does it at all show #that you happened to tap into another one of my passions #music #chevrolet aveo #daewoo tacuma

[shadowbrightshine]

idk if this is too personal, but how did you figure out you were ace?? I'm asking as an ace person who is curious about other ppls experiences

My experience is kinda funny!

My friend mentioned being ace, assuming I already knew I was back a bit before covid.

Incoming long post and a tiny bit of tmi for me.

I, a Christian girl in a small town who had barely any friends and also wasn't on the internet proper yet, had absolutely no idea what that was.

Eventually I found my way into learning all about it and my heart soared.

It took about a year for my family to really accept my identity. They mostly worried it would take over my life and that I wouldn't feel like I could change later on if I set my sexuality in stone. But now my family is on board. (I'll explain that in a minute. )

Now as for how I came to be like this?

I've always known I didn't want to do the same things as my peers did. Undiagnosed adhd until 2nd grade and autism in 6th explained some of it. But not all of it.

I was in 3rd grade when I discovered what adoption was via A Series Of Unfortunate Events. That series got me to love reading, and sparked my early interest in darker writing. Also taught me tons of words that some people are still as an adult surprised I know.

I declared I would adopt tons of children at that age. In fact I daydreamed about buying an entire orphanage and being the best mom in the world. I thought about all those kids who needed a home and I wanted to help. I also loved Meet the Robinsons and it made me want to adopt even more.

My parents gave me the sex talk. They didn't do whatever the birds amd bees is, I still have no idea what that is even now. They didn't go into a ton of detail obviously, I was like 10-12 I can't remember exactly. But they explained the "girl parts" and "boy parts" fit together to make a baby. (I learned the rest when I was a little older)

I thought it was gross. The idea of anyone's parts going in me made me feel kinda sick. It solidified my stance on adoption. I didn't want to have sex. I wanted to adopt kids because I didn't want to have them. But I did want to be a mother.

Growing up it was often chalked up to me not having hit puberty yet, me being young, and that I'd grow out of the adoption thing once I was a teenager.

It didn't. In fact once I hit puberty I wanted to have kids even less. My parts work, and feelings are feelings. I get horny, and I hate it because I don't want to have sex.

(Unfortunately for me, maybe tmi but I have bigger and longer labia, those protect the area but also have a lot of nerve endings. This leads to a lot of accidental stimulation and overstimulation from literally sitting on a hard chair. I can get sore riding bikes like the old newspapers claimed would happen to normal women. Pair that with autism, it's not fun.)

But the truth was I wanted to have sex less and less as I learned more and got more of a picture of how it works. The idea makes me feel bad. I don't want to look at a dick, ever. (I'm aware this may need compromise once I'm married. But I won't be having penatraitive sex even then. It limits my options by a lot but, I have plenty of time to find love)

Circling back I often made up crushes so people would stop asking me. I told other kids I had a crush on Einstein because he was dead so no one could tell him. I picked a random boy in 4th grade and forced myself to pretend I had a crush on him. I didn't really ever talk to him, but he was smart in my math class and he didn't make fun of me so I figured that would work. The closest to crushes over had were always on fictional characters, people who I couldn't upset or hurt or meet.

I never understood crushes. I do feel romantic love, in fact I've dreamt about falling in love for a long time. I experience aesthetic attraction, but the feeling I feel towards pretty humans is the same I feel towards a pretty painting. I recognize the beauty and then move on. Clothing stands out more to me than looks. This isn't meant to be a 'other people are shallow' thing. I do wish I understood how others felt like that. It looks fun. Now some of this is likely me being autistic as well.

Anyways. Once I learned I was ace, and accepted that for myself, things got easier on me. I felt so good to have a label for this.

Especially in high school. I finally had a fast way to let people know that I don't want to hook up. Not that anyone asked. I'm happy with how I look but I'm hoping I grow more into my mother's beauty because face wise I'm nothing special. (I've uh actually been complemented about my figure a few times though and that makes me very happy) I'm happy with how I look, but I know I don't turn any heads.

A few months ago my mom admitted something to me. She was actually relieved to learn I wasn't going to have kids.

My family has a ton of genetic health problems going up to 5 generations back on both sides. No, not because of weird interfamily relationships, because of unlucky genetic carriers and just plain bad luck. My dad has a degenerative condition, and my mother's side has had a variety of heart problems going back generations. Bad heart problems. My mom has hip displaisa, a partially fused spine, Hashimotos, allergies to nightshades, penicillin, mold, blood pressure problems, chronic migranes, chronic hip problems, and more. She has to take at least 7 pills daily, and none of them are pain meds.

All three of her children had to be delivered via C-section. I was born almost 3 1/2 months early. Turns out it was Preclampsia. That probably contributed to me being born with autism. Mom has never made it to full term with a child. If she had tried both of us would've died.

She said she's worried about what might happen to any children her kids might have. Especially the women in the family because (kinda obvious) that's where most of the genetic problems are coming through. Her mom had heart problems, her grandmother had heart problems, her great grandmother, and possibly farther but my mom's side didn't keep good track of the family tree. So she worries more about her daughters in that regard.

She says she looked into the Bible and also saw that God calls some to lives of celibacy. Which technically would be me. I plan to die a "Virgin".

She knows how much I want to be a mom, and she's supportive of me adopting one day. My dad doesn't talk about it but he's not against it anymore.

It was really nice to know she worried about that because I've been worrying about what might happen if I ever tried to have kids of my own for years. I always knew my parents had health problems. And from as young as 8 years old I worried about my baby getting really sick if I had one. I didn't want to have a baby but I still worried that if I did they'd get super sick.

I've always lived my life with the intention to adopt children from the time I learned about it. And when I learned how expensive it is, I adjusted and planned on making more money to afford the fees.

When I learned I was asexual it made me so much happier.

And it also made it easier to engage with kink content. There is plenty of kink that doesn't involve the private parts which is fun! Sorry if that's also tmi.

So... yeah! That's my story. Or some of it.

#shine post #im ace #asexual spectrum #actually asexual #asexual adult #ace #asexual #asexual journey #answers #ask me anything

[vivihern]

My Guide for the (in)Experienced CS researcher/student.

Introduction

So here you are, an up-and-coming CS student looking for some help when it comes to researching in your topic. Or maybe you are a veteran student looking for some food for thought while you research the next thing that tickles your fancy, or maybe you are just a self-taught coder looking for some more material to teach you.

Well, worry not, whether you fit any of these descriptions or not. This blog will present what I found to be some crucial information when it comes to research in this field, of course research can be described as formal paper writing, or even as simple as just looking into something on your own. Even if this blog does not teach you anything groundbreaking, it will still be a nice point of reference when you need that confirmation on something you are doing, won’t it?

The Info

There are plenty of places to begin or consider when looking at CS research, you may have questions such as: “Where can I get information at? How about online resources? What do Computer Scientists research? How do they research, what methods/approaches?”, etc. Well, if any of your questions follow those lines you may be in luck, as I have scoured some sources to find information on those questions I had myself.

 Well, let’s start with the nitty and gritty of formal CS research. Although the info I found was a little dated, I believe that the principles driving this subject have not really changed that much since then, rather than just the technology and concepts we use. This information is based off research articles and journals from the late 90s. Now to highlight some of the more important data, let us go in the order the study presents itself.

The spread of computer science topics that this study found in the articles that it reviewed. Now to no one’s surprise things like societal issues and disciplinary issues were not covered very much, if at all. The greatest topic of interest in these articles and studies was “Computer Concepts (at 28.67)”, this mostly comprised of hardware and architecture research, as well as operating system research. The next greatest was “Problem-Specific Domains”, which I imagine has to do with private programs and systems. However, the majority of this was graphics and pattern analysis. The rest in order of greatest abundance to least would be: “Systems/Software management concepts”, “Systems/Software concepts”, “Data/Information concepts”, and finally “Problem Solving concepts”.

This next bit of information will cover several table’s worth of analysis about the references, approaches, findings, etc. So, it may seem like a lot of jumping around, however I will include the link to the study so that you can look farther into it if this blog captivates you so.

The approach to the many different articles and studies covered by this study shows that the most used approach to research was a formulative one, at a whopping 79.15%. The findings for research methods show that nearly all of them used a Conceptual Analysis/Mathematical method, along with just Conceptual Analysis the two of which make up 88.54% of the methods covered by all the articles in this study. Now to little surprise, the analysis in these studies either covered “Computing Elements” or “Abstract Concepts”. And finally, the discipline that these CS researchers referenced the most was in fact their own discipline, Computer Science at 89.33%, with the next being Mathematics at 8.6%.

However, the issue with this information is that it does not quite include one of the biggest aspects of our modern lives, that of course being the world-wide-web, or internet. As well as it being based off articles and studies done back in the 90s. Now of course there is a lot of discourse whether sources online are trustworthy enough or not to be used for important research. And there is no definitive formula or standard for finding out whether a source is fit for research or not. Even those websites that seem respectable can be exactly otherwise, there are even loopholes to attain the .org and .edu domains for personal websites! It is up to you to determine a site’s credibility.

Some general steps to follow when going through these sites are things such as: misspellings, amount of advertisements on screen, stability of the server connection, and just your own intuition on the content of the site. Does it sound right or wrong? Did a real person write this, do they even know what they are talking about, etc. This is, of course, common knowledge on the internet. However, it seems that a lot of younger and older people lack this knowledge, so it doesn’t hurt to go over it once more. After all it’s not like CS is only for young adults or older teenagers.

However, there are some credible sites online where you can go to learn more about Computer Science, some examples are websites such as www.stackoverflow.com , www.w3schools.com , www.theodinproject.com , www.codecademy.com, as well as many others! Just know that if you want to learn more about Computer Science or coding there is a site for everything, any language, for any skill level. You just must look for it. So when you are just keep your basic internet safety tips in mind. And if something requires a payment to access, make sure it’s not a scam and that it’s worth it by looking at reviews and general opinion on that service.

Conclusion

Now I know this didn’t seem like an extensive guide to learn more about doing your CS research, but that’s the point. You can’t get all the information from me, this blog is to show you some beginning points, and to let your own curiosity go and check out the sources and sites I mentioned. You have what you need, and now it’s time for the baby bird to fly out of the nest. So go and start learning what you want to about CS. The sites I provided are great starts, and whatever comes after, formal education, textbooks, advanced courses, getting a job, etc. make sure you don’t forget the basics!

www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/S0164121203000153?fr=RR-2&ref=pdf_download&rr=873899782d9c6c82 (This is the study I was going over first if you put the name in the search engine and dig around a bit you can probably find one with public access. But you didn’t hear that from me!)

I included this audio recording just in case you were too lazy to read this text dump of a blog, Enjoy!

#computer science #coder #research #student

[amalasdraws]

Hi! do you have any advice on looking for/noticing a promising study material and not falling for unhelpful art tips? Ik what I want to improve and study but still catch myself having trouble finding effective and useful content, im afraid of falling for another unpleasant art method and only realize it after a long time

Hey hey, Ohh I have a lot of thoughts on this so I will try to collect them and find the right words. Sorry if this might get longer.

Something important to understand about art tips online is, that they are tips. Never the universal truth. They are posted by artists who are not teachers, but people who draw and found a way that works for themselves. And as many of those art tips are good and might even show important basics, it's based on what the artist knows, what they consider important and what works for them. And, not to forget, what they were able to put into works and what they had time and energy for to put together. They are doing it for free after all!

I'm a self taught artist and a lot of the things I do are not how a classical art education would teach them. I figured out my own ways and found ways and things that work for me. I always try to voice my small art show and tells that way. This is what I do. This is what works for me! It might give a nice insight for others and even help some. But for some it might not. Doesn't mean they are unhelpful! Just that what works for one might not work another.

One of the most controversial art advices is "just draw". And as this is is not always constructive and sure has its flaws I still see a lot of truth in this! I have many young artists ask me things like "how do I draw", "how do I get better". And as learning basics is essential, I feel it's very important to first just draw and explore things. Be free and have fun. Not only does it help to get our muscles going and smooth out our lines and get the whole machine going, but also helps to figure out what we want and what works for us!

You say that you know want to improve and study. This is already great and a very important first step. I would advice to figure out what works for you. Everyone learns differently and has their own approaches. I'm for example are not good with classic studies and book practices. I need to do the thing, draw, look at things and find my own tricks and ways. Puzzle it together myself by drawing the things I like. Studies and where I have to draw what I'm told bore me to death. Others are more technical and need more structure. What works for you?

Either way I would advice to not see internet tutorials as unhelpful, but still be wary of them and not just take everything as word! You can pick your own things together. If you like one thing from a tutorial but the rest doesn't work for you, okay, good, take what you need! Both things together from different tutorials and find out which of them is actual helpful for what you want and need and what works for you. Mix your own ideas into it. Art tips are only that, tips! Take from them what works for you own art method and own style. You know best what works for you. Trust that!

This is me talking from own experiences, but one thing that worked for me is to not look as much as tutorials at all. Rather look at what other artists you like do and try to figure out how they do it or how you could get there. What is something they do you like? Why do you like it and how would this translate this to your style and own art? If you see an artist who does something you like and would like to know you can also ask them how they do it. Again, this will be their way, but this insight might help you to understand how it can be approached and then see how would this work for you. And best is always to ask concrete questions. Not a general "how do I draw" or "how do I get better". This is way too broad and difficult to answer. Size it down to what you actual want to know and ask specifically. Sometimes this can work better than a general art tip.

Of course there are also study books and basic studies collected by people who are art teachers and who have found methods and words that work. Again, not everyone can work with such instructions and books, but for those who can those can be helpful. So if you are someone who works better with methods and constructions it might be worth to find some books and borrow or even buy them and not relying so much on online sources, as those are not filtered and can have everything from good to terrible advice. Or if you found an artist online who shared some helpful things for you, stay there! Find sources and artists you trust and stay with them and don't look too much around for every art tip. Too many might be too much. This is what I mean with not to look at too many tutorials.

All of this is based a lot on own experiences and how I learn. So this might be unhelpful to you too :D or at least take it as one insight and tip only, not the total truth there is.

I wish you all the best on your art journey! And if there is something specific in my art you like and would like to know more about feel free to ask. I can tell you what I do and what works for me :D

#amalas talks #long text #drawing progress #art tutorial #amalas answers

[lumine-no-hikari]

Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #28

I found myself feeling just a little bit world-weary today as a result of various things piling up. I'll not get into the specifics; it's not important. I thought I'd have more energy to do things, but the last straw happened on my way home from being out and about; it's been snowing here all day, and even though I was driving slowly, I still ended up slipping on the ice and the snow, and almost crashed into oncoming traffic as a result. I made it home all right; nothing bad happened. But I was still spooked, so I tried to use today to rest, with varying success.

Do you ever feel that way sometimes? Spooked by random happenings outside of your control? Tired of dealing with the broader social fabric of things that causes people to get hurt arbitrarily even though you know that it wouldn't have to be this way if everyone just agreed to not be nasty to one another? What do you do when that happens? Do you rest? What does rest look like for you? I wonder…

Today I tried to refill my depleted energy reserves a little by doing nice things for myself and the people around me. I brought home pizza and milkshakes for myself and the folks in my house. They seemed happy, and I felt good in response to that for a moment - as though my existence has some kind of use somehow, despite everything.

…I know that no human being should have to be useful in some way to be considered worthwhile. But I have what feels like a lifetime of conditioning in which I've been taught that my existence is only tolerable if I'm making myself useful to someone else. So, although it's easy for me to see that other people have inherent worth no matter what (you, too; you don't have to be "useful" to anyone first), it's often hard for me to look at myself with those same humane eyes. I wonder if you might know a little about what this is like. Something tells me you might.

But I can't stay like this forever and still expect myself to be any good for the people around me; the people who love me want me to act like a human being, not like furniture (silent and out of the way until it's needed). Also, it makes them sad when I'm hard on myself, and them being sad just because I am surrendering to old survival-oriented mental-emotional scripts is unacceptable to me. So I work on it. I learn to be a little kinder to myself day by day, and I get a little better the more I practice. I do this work because I've since learned that the real meaning of strength isn't within making yourself into someone who is unfeeling and hard-hearted. No, real strength lies in challenging all the self-destructive bullshit you were fed your whole life, replacing harsh beliefs with softer, less judgmental ones, and having courage enough to make kinder choices towards yourself and towards other people, even when you know you might get hurt as a result of it all.

So I rested. For me, that looks like eating tasty food, staying hydrated with some warm beverage (tea is good stuff), and doing things that replenish me. Today I played Pokémon. I stuck up for someone on the internet who looked like they could use a kind word. I talked to a few friends. I tried focusing on the small ways that I can do good things in my immediate vicinity, even though my brain is doing everything in its power to try to make me think that my existence is an aberration or a mistake. I don't have to surrender to thoughts like that. And I can feel my emotions fully without them controlling me, and when it becomes too much, I can ask for help, like all humans should. I can do difficult things like that. You can do difficult things like that, too.

And, in terms of metaphor, if emotions are fish, then I am the pond, and I can accept that sometimes the fish are gonna flop around and dart to and fro, as fish do. A proper pond gives the fish plenty of room to be themselves, flowing artfully around each individual one instead of trying to control or suppress them. Every human can be a pond whether they realize it or not. As such, I hope you are taking care to get to know each of your fish so you can treat them properly. It will allow you to make good decisions, even when they're thrashing and wriggling around.

I know you can't answer me, but I'm asking you anyway because you're worth someone caring enough to ask, and your mind is worth being known and considered by other people: what does rest look like for you? It's essential to all living creatures (you're a living creature and a HUMAN, no matter the circumstances of your birth and no matter what any half-crocked butt-nugget tries to tell you). It's one of the things that makes living worthwhile. And it's one of the things that allows us to be our best selves for the people around us. I'm still practicing letting myself do it reliably; I'll get there. And if you're not good at resting, then you'll get there, too, if you practice; you're a lot smarter than me, after all, and so you'll probably learn it a lot more quickly than I can.

On days like today, when my brain is being particularly nasty, sometimes I'll try to drown out its nonsense with a song. Today, this one seems most appropriate:

The shape of the melody and the color of the words match the inside of my mind quite nicely right now. Perhaps you'll find it relatable.

If it was up to you and you knew that you might lose… would you still be brave and choose to continue? Will you refuse to give up on all the beautiful and loving things that this world can still offer, despite all the other unpleasant stuff that sometimes happens? Will you keep moving forward, no matter how many weary footprints you've left behind in the sand?

You can do it. You can make good, kind, and loving choices. I believe in you, and I'll always be over here, cheering you on in whatever ways I can. So please stay safe. Please come back to us in one piece. Please put yourself in a position in which you can build a peaceful life for yourself and all the people of your world. Genesis, Angeal, and Zack are waiting with open arms for you to return to them, I'm sure. And lots of people in my world are waiting for you to return, too, if you're ready. Let us help you, won't you? We can still fix this.

I think I'll end this one here-ish; I'm pretty tired, and I feel like if I keep going, I'm just gonna ramble. So please... just... remember that you're loved and necessary, okay? Don't ever lose sight of that fact.

Until next time.

Your friend, Lumine

#sephiroth #ThankYouFFVIIDevs #ThankYouFF7Devs #ThankYouSephiroth #final fantasy vii #final fantasy 7 #ff7 #ffvii #final fantasy vii crisis core #final fantasy 7 crisis core #final fantasy crisis core #ffvii crisis core #ff7 crisis core #crisis core #ff7r #final fantasy vii remake #final fantasy 7 remake #ffvii remake #ff7 remake #final fantasy vii rebirth #final fantasy 7 rebirth #ffvii rebirth #ff7 rebirth #final fantasy 7 ever crisis #ffvii ever crisis #ff7 ever crisis #ffvii first soldier #rest is essential #continue #wholesome

[airi-p4]

JATP AU: Everlasting musical connection - Chapter 4

Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Epilogue … 

Julie and the Phantoms x Lukanette AU

(Sorry for the incoming little rant)

I'm a bit mad tbh because I wrote this before we had any leaks or information about S5 and now it looks like the 'red moon' and Felix are a canon reference when they're NOT. But I guess it's partly my fault for not posting this earlier... *sigh*

Anyway- This story will be finished! Idk when but it will! Thank you for your patience.

_______________________________

TW: check AO3 for the tags ( !!! )

Chapter summary:

Marinette refuses to accept the Phantoms imminent crossing over, and decides to face the only one who may know a way to help them: the magician ghost Felix- their enemy.

___________________________________________

AO3

___________________________________________

CHAPTER 4

While the ghosts were busy at the cemetery, Marinette snuck out of high school to go to Paris' Ghost club. She had only heard about the exclusive club from the Phantoms and rumors, and she had no idea how to find it… but the Internet tricks Alya taught her some time ago did the rest of the job.

Felix wasn't lying when he said the doors would be exceptionally opened for her anytime. She would have never imagined going straight to the enemy's headquarters and exposing herself to such danger.

The girl had already confronted the centuries old magician ghost once and knew too well how dangerous he was. She had to be cautious- he knew a great amount of tricks. She stepped in, carefully at first, but soon brought her courage afloat after remembering her mission had a time limit.

Just a few more hours.

She had no time to lose.

“Felix! Show yourself! I know you’re here!” she called loudly.

“Oh, my my… look who's here: Marinette Dupain-Cheng…” a voice said from the shadows. The teenager got shivers, but remained courageous, standing tall. “To think you would visit me… Aren’t you scared I may possess your body like I did with your blond pathetic friend?”

“I know how to kick you out now! I’m not scared of you!” she yelled, and his evil laugh interrupted. Within a blink, he appeared in front of her and she gasped. “I’m- I’m not scared of you!” she repeated.

“Yet you’re here, trembling like a newborn puppy…” Felix laughed, amused by her fears. The sound of his slow steps walking in circles around her was keeping her alert. “How desperate you must be for your ‘Phantoms’ if you’ve come to me in order to save them…”

“Shut up!" She recomposed at the mention of her friends "I know there has to be a way! A way so they don’t have to cross over! Or maybe that they can come back to life!”

“Oh, innocent child… Don’t you think I’d have already done that myself if there was a way?”  His laugh echoed in the club, giving her goosebumps.

“I know you keep secrets. And I know you’re good at hiding them. But your powers are not only for evil. And music! Music has to be the reason you’re still aliv- well, not completely dead.”

“Haha… Very funny…" A few claps followed ironically. "You did well figuring out this much… Hmmm... What would you say if I told you there’s a way for them to come back to life?” he tempted her in a hum.

“Is there!?"

“Oh, so you’re interested, huh?” He smirked evilly and Marinette remembered he wasn't going to give her what she wanted for free. She knew him.

“What’s the deal?” she demanded, looking straight in his eyes.

“An exchange." He paused in front of her, close. "Your soul. Your life for theirs. How does that sound?”

She paused for a second, out of the shock, and before her voice left her throat she was interrupted by three newcomers.

“NEVER!" they yelled. Marinette's eyes opened big.

“Luka! Guys! Why are you here!?”

“Oh, c’mon Marinette, we know you. We’ve been together for a while now.” Juleka winked. "You can't fool us."

“We’ve actually followed you here and eavesdropped a bit…” Ivan innocently confessed.

“Don’t tell her, Ivan! I was trying to act cool and steal the show!”

“Oops, my bad-”

“Anyway- No one is taking away Marinette’s life. That’s out of the question. We’ll cross over and Marinette will be an amazing singer on her own- or with her new band or whatever she chooses to do with her outstanding talent.” Luka stepped in between Marinette and Felix, pushing him and raising a protective arm in front of her. Marinette's eyes glowed and teared up at him.

“Are you sure you want to cross over while I’m still around? I could try to harm her anytime… Try to figure out her connection with spirits… Or maybe a fatal accident could bring her talent here, to me. Maybe she would agree to remain in my club for all eternity, unlike you...”

“Don’t you dare!” Felix's threat enraged Luka. "Touch her and I'm killing you!"

“Luka…” Marinette blushed, moved.

“Yeah. It seems our last warning wasn’t enough... Let’s kill this ghost.” Juleka jumped closer, fists clenched.

“I wish so too, but guys: we can’t kill him. He’s already dead!” Ivan pointed out and Felix's smile widened.

“You’re not helping, Ivan!” The bassist glared. “And I'm not giving up just like that! There has to be a way to stop him for good!” Her nails sank deeper in her palms.

“There might be a way,” a familiar voice that sounded weak and sweet interrupted, appearing from upstairs.

“Rose!? You were ok!?” Juleka ran towards her beloved ghost, holding her hands tenderly.

“I heard your voice, Juleka, and I rushed here despite the jolts of Felix’s attachment spell." She smiled weakly and it brought Juleka to the verge of tears.

“You fool! I’m so happy to see you…” She hugged her.

“Me, too.” Rose pulled her closer, enjoying the warmth.

“Oh, what a sweet moment…" Felix hummed. "Too bad it won't last long…" His eyes turned red and the blond girl gasped. "Rose. I own your soul and you disobeyed me. You’re going to disappear now-” His fingers were about to snap, but Juleka jumped between Rose and Felix.

“No! I won’t let you harm her!”

The next second, Rose pushed Juleka behind her, making her fall to the floor. Felix's destructive thunder followed its path towards the two ghosts and everyone gasped when the blond ghost was hit.

“ROSE! NO!” Juleka cried, crawling to hold her falling body in her arms.

“Juleka, guys, listen…" Rose coughed. "I’m going to disappear soon, but… there’s a way… There’s a way you can stay here. Love and music... The red moon… Join your powers together... Your bond is special- strong. You can do it… you can make a miracle happen...”

"Rose! No!" Juleka cried.

"As for Felix… Take my curse and cast it to him… hurry up… before I disappear… Do it and he'll remain trapped here forever…" Rose whispered to Juleka. She knew the Phantoms were close enough to hear her, too. "Ivan. Do it, please. Only you can. Hold my wrist and take it. Hurry!"

"I- ok!" Ivan did as Rose told him, and a mark appeared on his wrist.

"Good…" She smiled in relief. “Now you have to say the words: ‘Resistance’, pass the curse to his wrist and say ‘Gift.’. The spell will activate then. Will you do it?” Ivan nodded, uncertain. Rose’s voice became weaker. “Thank you… Now I can leave at peace…"

“No, Rose… Don’t leave me…” Juleka begged in tears.

“I’m very happy to have met you, Juleka." Rose smiled weakly at her. "I love you.”

“Rose… I love you… I love you, too…” Some of Juleka's tears fell on Rose's cheeks. The rest fell on the floor through her disappearing skin.

"Don’t hurry up to join me on the other side, ok? Make a miracle happen. I’ll wait for you. Forever…”

"Rose, no!" Juleka cried. "Rose!!'

"Goodbye…" Rose smiled as she turned into hundreds of flying shining golden lights. On the floor, only her unicorn hairpin remained. Juleka picked it up, kissed it, and put it in her hair. Her long bangs now stuck in place, not covering her deathly glaring eyes anymore. Then she took a deep breath and cleaned her tears as she confidently recovered. Her eyes soon glared at Felix with all her wrath.

“Guys- That’s it. I’m killing this man! Are you with me?”

“Juleka, don’t be reckless, you could end up harmed too!” Luka warned, terrified for his sister, Ivan, and Marinette's safety.

“I don’t care! He just killed Rose! I can NEVER forgive him!”

“Juleka!”

Juleka's fierce voice turned into a loud roar, and it made the whole club tremble. Luka tried to hold Marinette, but she lost her balance when she fell through Luka's spiritual arm. Felix's eyes opened wide and before he could even blink, Juleka charged against him, punching his face with all her power. Felix fell on the floor with a face of not believing what was happening.

“What!?” Her bandmates gasped, in awe.

It took Felix a second to react. He touched his face where the punch had landed and checked his fingers; there was blood at the corner of his lip. “How- how is this possible!? You-- injured ME?”

Juleka roared loud, jumped, and tackled Felix, immobilizing him with Ivan's help. “Guys. We can do this.” Juleka's fist clenched again, more confident, ready to attack once more. Some stripes, resembling a tiger, appeared over her skin, on her face and arms.

“You…" Felix looked as if he couldn’t believe it, but seeing how her fist raised he changed his attitude to a self-protective one. “I see… So that’s how it is…” he mumbled. He tilted his head down and half-covered his smile with his hand.

Enraged, Juleka raised her fist and prepared to punch him again. "What's so funny, huh!?" Felix didn't answer.

"Do it now, Ivan! The curse!" Luka yelled.

Ivan took the chance while Felix was immobilized under Juleka to pass him the curse. "Wait. Is that Rose's curse? As if this was going to work…” He smirked. But his smile didn’t last long- wiped off his face when Ivan said the words he learnt from Rose: “Resistance.”. His eyes opened wide, as in realization. “No… No! No please!" He begged, but the mark had already appeared on his wrist. "No…!"

“Gift,” Ivan finished the spell, and the mark blended with his ghost skin. The Phantoms looked at the mark's shine spreading over all his body. A jolt followed and it was proof enough the spell seemed to work. They exchanged relieved looks while Felix curled his body in pain.

"Good. You can't leave this hotel ever again, Felix. Now Marinette will finally be safe," Luka said, looking fondly at Marinette.

"And now… To ensure it even further… I'm going to kill you!" Juleka raised her fist one more time, and Felix's face changed to one of fear.

"No, wait- wait please! I'll tell you what you want to know! There is a way to survive! Just don’t kill me!” the magician begged, coughing from the jolts.

Juleka wasn't stopping. "We’re not falling for this again, Felix!”

“The red moon!" he yelled when Juleka's fist almost touched him. "Tonight! It grants special powers to the spirits! Rose is right! With the right spell, a miracle could happen under the moon!"

“Really?” Marinette stepped closer.

Luka looked at her hopeful eyes in worry. “I’m sorry, Marinette, but I don’t trust him. I don’t think we should risk it…" he said, and Marinette looked back at him in sadness.

“But what if he’s right? What if it’s possible for you to come back to life? Or to stay as you are? Rose said it, too! We have nothing to lose! Let’s try it! Let’s go under the red moonlight and-” the girl insisted, desperate.

“Wait.”

“Juleka?”

The purple-haired ghost roared as she punched the floor just beside the magician's face. He gulped in fear.

“Tell us what’s the spell. If you don’t then…” Her fist rose again and he covered his face with his arms.

“Fine! I’ll tell you!” he finally gave in. “Tonight, under the red moonlight, at 2AM exactly, you have to repeat the magic words, three times: ‘kwamis, release the magic.’ If my theory and Rose’s suspicions are correct, you’ll be able to ask for a wish- a miracle.”

“And how do we know you’re telling us the truth?” Ivan asked.

Felix smirked. “You can’t know, truly. But I have no reason to give you a fake spell. I can’t cast it on my own anyway, since moonlight is needed and I’m now trapped here forever…” He suffered again from the spell.

“Tricking us for revenge sounds like a good reason for lying to me…” Marinette glared.

“Revenge? Against you pitiful souls? Don’t make me laugh.” He smirked evilly, still coughing. “You’re worthless. As pathetic as Rose was…” He touched Rose’s unicorn hairpin for a second and Juleka grabbed his shirt collar.

“DON’T YOU DARE MENTION ROSE EVER AGAIN!” Juleka threatened.

“Hmph- Whatever.” Felix's smirk widened. “You can try the spell or not. But isn’t this your only chance? No one knows if it really works anyway, but you won’t know unless you try. You know what not trying means anyway…”

Juleka growled at him and he shrugged, his fear seemingly gone despite the electric jolts striking again.

“Let him go, Juleka. He’s right,” Luka said, to Marinette’s surprise. “We don’t have much time left, and he’s trapped here forever, whether he's telling the truth or not, our fate is sealed. I can rest in peace knowing he won't be able to harm Marinette.”

“But-” Marinette and Juleka protested.

“We have a concert to go to, right? Let’s forget about Felix and enjoy the last hours we have together.” Luka shrugged with a weak smile. Marinette and Juleka weren’t happy, but ended up following Luka’s lead.

"It's time for you to pay for your sins." Juleka stood up and looked down in absolute disgust at Felix. “Enjoy your solitude for eternity.”

_________________________

The ghosts escorted Marinette out of the hotel and they sighed in relief when they reunited outside. Once outside, Luka turned to speak to Marinette.

"Don't you ever do that again, Marinette. Don't expose yourself to danger like that. Especially not for us, when we're already…" The guitarist had an urge to hug her, but he knew he couldn't even touch her. His body language was obvious to his ghost bandmates, though, who smiled sadly at them.

“I'm sorry… I wanted to-" she stopped, not wanting to be scolded again when the count on their wrists kept going down. "You’re the best friends I could ever have,” Marinette thanked them.

“You’re our treasure, Marinette.” Luka gave her his sweetest smile and she blushed.

If he wasn't a ghost, he would have probably leaned down to kiss her, had she allowed him, of course. But he knew better. Both of them knew better. They belonged to different worlds, despite their connection being so real...

*cof cof*

The pair turned to Juleka and realized they had been staring at each other's eyes for too long. Ivan looked away, slightly blushing, and Marinette panicked a bit. Luka smiled at her cuteness before taking the lead again.

“Ok, let’s go! We can't be late to our last concert tonight!”

“Hell yeah! I’m on fire!” Juleka exclaimed.

"Have you decided yet which song we're performing?" Ivan asked, stretching his wrists.

"I have," Marinette interrupted. "I know exactly which one song we should perform." She grinned and the Phantoms smiled back at her.

"Ok, let's do it!"

____________________

"We're 'Marinette and the Phantoms,' and today was our last concert. Please enjoy our last song: ‘everlasting musical connection’!"

There was evident shock, sadness, and devastated fans at the French Orpheum, but it was soon replaced by the feelings that resonated through the music with the frantic audience.

Their last concert was short, but moreover, it was unforgettable. Epic. Outstanding.

Legendary.

Those were the adjectives the specialized press was already calling it online.

#my fic #airip4 #JATP AU #JATP x Lukanette AU #lukanette fic #endgame lukanette #(((PLEASE: check AO3 for possible TW))))

[lostvox]

Growing up on the internet was something that ended up being both a blessing and a curse. On one hand, it allowed me to learn about so many different things from around the world that I would never even know existed. It gave me community in the various places I have frequented since 2007, and helped me grow into myself as a musician and artist.

On the other hand, it also gave me incredibly crippling imposter syndrome - I felt that I could never compete with those who were older, smarter, and more talented than me. I always felt a sense of belittlement from my own mind because I wasn’t where I wanted to be in life. It also crushed my kindness and made me a meaner person for a long time, and I’m still working on trying not to be them anymore.

But the biggest thing it has done for me, especially in the last six years, is given me my agency back. I was so afraid of being made fun of as a kid; I had a lot of trauma from both family and friends that made me a reclusive person. The internet let me be who I wanted, and gave me knowledge to help me find who that was.

The internet helped me find the furry community. It gave me an understanding of trans identity, and it exposed me to what life can truly be like as a queer person, which I had never had access to as someone who grew up in predominantly red areas.

It also taught me to live authentically, and that ‘cringe’ is a construct. Being able to write songs about wanting to be a dog, wearing animal costumes in cities all over the US, and foster more intimate relationships with those I love in my life has been a gift. I know I wouldn’t still be here if it weren’t for all of my friends hiding in my computer.

All this to say, I’m so glad to have the life I do. I’m thankful to be able to act like a dog and have people be like “yeah! bark bark!”. But most of all, I’m grateful for the parts of everyone I’ve met being embedded in my soul for the rest of time.

#sorry for the novel lmao #feeling strong feelings today

[zerobaseonefics]

Hello! How are you??

I'm Luna, this will be kinda random because I haven't sent you any other asks before, but I gotta tell you, my blood is boiling right now. I'm tired of seeing almost every single day a bunch of p*rn bots interacting with my stuff (or following me), and I hate to see certain things when I go to their "blogs" in order to check if everything's safe (like, the normal things you would see in a normal blog) and confirm if I have to block them or not. Up until this is fine, I guess. Normal behaviour involving random cursed bots.

But. BUT. You know it must be a real person behind an ask, not even the Anon feature can hide that. To see people straight up asking for NSFW content about idols who happen to be literal minors... It's fucked up as hell.

Actually, and as far as these cursed Internet lands had taught me over the curse of the years, NSFW involves things that may be disturbing for the eye, such as gore and violence themes. Sensitive topics, you may say.

There's people who write that kind of stories, mostly involving Mafia, Supernatural Creatures (such as vampires and werewolves), Murder (I've noticed that the japanese sterereotype of yandere has became really popular)... I can confidently say that this fields are kind of a "safer" path to take when it comes to NSFW.

Then again, we go back to the cursed shit. The sexual themes.

I'm not a fan of that, at all. I respect authors who choose to revolve their works around it, though, but I would never read anything from that genre. However, we all know there's a limit to (almost) everything.

I'm young, I've been a teen, surrounded by all those classmates going through puberty and changes. I have basic knowledge about how the human body works, and, even if mine doesn't seem to follow those rules, I know even teenagers can experience certain feelings and emotions as actual adults do.

I can understand that there may be non-adult fans that may feel those things towards idols like they would towards any other random people. I can understand too that those idols can be minors as well, completely normal, can't say that I like it, but I won't judge.

But when those feelings and emotions come from an actual adult... That's when you know you have to ask for help. Maybe it's just that you have a mental ilness (wouldn't justify it either) and all you need is therapy, or maybe you're just a literal disgusting piece of shit who doesn't deserve to leave their house nor have access to the Internet for the rest of their useless life. All I know is that even if you wait for them to grow up, you're still the whole garbage dump.

...

I'm truly sorry for all of this, both you having to deal with those horrid creatures and me bothering you with my blabbering. I didn't mean to write that much, but I just needed to take the stuff out in hopes to feel better I guess?? Once again, if you've read all of it, I'm so sorry. I hope I'll come back with another random ask that actually involves your blog sometime! Also, keep up the good work! 💖

hey luna!! i'm venom and it's nice to meet you <3 it's a shame we get to talk for the first time because of this matter. your message is in no way bothering me, don't worry!! i even find it interesting, don't feel pressured about the fact it was long.

first, i'm so sorry you had to come across so many of this kind of blogs :// hope you won't see them anymore in the future.

just like you, as much as i respect authors who write nsfw, i avoid reading it. first, because of religious convictions, second because i just keep imagining myself in the place of the artist and i think i'd feel unconfortable seeing nsfw about me. i mean, yeah, they'll probably never see it but i don't think i could ever write one. i can read it if it's something necessary in a story for example, and it's nicely written, otherwise it's not my kind.

but i just think it's basic human decency to not write about minors. there's nothing to explain there, it's just common sense and it strikes me sm to see that it's not something logical for some ppl.... the fact that they are waiting for yujin to be an adult doesn't make them less disgusting, because it doesn't mean nothing is happening in their head. they must be thinking disgusting shit about it, the only thing they are waiting for is something to help them satisfy it and i honestly can't stand this. plus, the fact my little brother is the same age as him makes me feel even more grossed out cuz i would never want my brother to live this.

but yk? it's the internet right? and the power of being anonymous ig. no matter what we'll say i don't think anything is really gonna change for the moment...

you can come around whenever you want, whatever the topic is, don't worry <3 i'm glad you like what i'm doing, have a nice day!!

#zerobaseonefics

[wanderlust-----witch]

I decided to do some basic internet research on the church denomination I grew up in. Having distanced myself after coming out as bi and trans, I didn't really think much about its influence on my life past the age of 19. However, I can't ignore it anymore.

I am culturally Christian and I grew up in an evangelical church and home. My mother and grandparents on her side had a very large influence on how I was supposed to grow up. Clearly, somewhere, they missed the mark, because I am still very openly polyamorous, genderqueer, and pan/ace. I love my mother and my nana and my papa (rest in peace). But I can't associate with the church that they do. My mother and grandmother have overcome so many of their bigotries, and they both accept me and my siblings regardless of who we are. I love them, but I can't love the church that raised me.

I have a lot to unlearn. Like, a LOT. Growing up in the church that I did, we were strongly encouraged to attend all sorts of conferences and retreats and camps and the like to be with others like us. Other people who understood us. The community we had was encouraged to be tight knit, there were no secrets. Secrets were sin, and we didn't sin. Sure, slip ups were inevitable, we're only human after all. But we could overcome sin if we did everything else exactly the way we were supposed to. We read the Bible, we abided by the Word, we lived for Jesus and loved God and shared the Holy Spirit.

The favorite Bible verses of my church were Matthew 28:19-20. "Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, blessing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit..." I can recite it still. It haunts me. I was taught for so long that the only right way to be a Christian was to pass the Word to everyone I met, to show them how much better their lives would be if they just followed Christ like I did.

We weren't encouraged to leave the church for any means. The only college they offered to help us get into was the sole college associated with the denomination. After that, we would return home, get married to someone we had likely met at college, have kids, and raise them in the church, propagating further generations to follow and serve in the same ways we did.

I felt disillusioned after I wanted to live as my true self, and I told my pastor, and he discouraged me from sharing it openly. I think that was actually the last time I stopped regularly going to church. I took any and all shifts I could on Sundays for the excuse of not being able to attend church. My boss noticed I was suddenly eager to work early on Sundays, and asked if anything changed. "No," I replied, "it hasn't."

Oh but it had. My entire community abandoned me. I hadn't known anyone else. I attended one church from infancy to twelve years old, and another from thirteen on. I hardly remember by first church because of my age (but also familial trauma, unrelated). But the second church. It was a home to me. There were people my age, older people to look up to, younger people to teach, we were all just one giant extended family.

I attended weekly, I volunteered for special events, I taught Sunday school, I participated in the middle and high school youth groups. I did everything I could for my church. But they stopped doing things for me.

So here I am, 25 years old, finally learning about the environment I grew up in. It was so toxic, so so very toxic. Toxic positivity, toxic views of the world around us. It was very much "us versus them", and the "them" was to be converted to "us". We were the only "right" path. In my minimal research conducted so far, I have read that the church was supposed to be fairly diverse. And yet, the churches I grew up in were 98% white. Oh sure, there were some single parents, some individuals. But we always told them, you have family in us.

I remember a time where we talked about the ways of overcoming sin in one of the youth group meetings. We talked about someone who had attended the group previous admitting he had an addiction to porn. Now, back then, I was under the impression that any sort of porn consumption was bad. Masturbation? Forget about it. It was all bad, all sex was bad unless you were married and trying to have kids. It was the worst thing you could do for your body. So porn, obviously, was the worst form of media to consume. We never got details about how much porn he watched, and I realize now it was likely intentional. One video a week, ten videos a day, regardless you were consuming it despite knowing it was wrong, therefore it was clearly an addiction that needed intervention. Of course it scared me out of consuming porn, I didn't want to develop an addiction. My familial history showed me that I was genetically predisposed to addictions, so if I ever watched porn, I feared becoming addicted.

It all came to a head, like I said, when I was actively discouraged from living my life as myself. Stepping back after so many years has made me realize a lot more about my upbringing that I ever expected to learn. I grew up in a cult. A Christian cult. Evangelism is a cult. And I'm trying so very hard to learn and unlearn and grow from this. I am no longer a Christian, and I don't think I will be in this lifetime again. I am too afraid to fall into those traps again, proselytizing my heart out for the good of humanity. That's not right of me to do, and I don't want to do it. I will never try to convert anyone to my beliefs. They are my own, and they have no bearing on any life except my own.

My husband knew I grew up in a Christian household. He didn't know the details until recently, when I casually mentioned it to one of his friends. I don't remember the exact context of the conversation, but I do know that was the first time he heard me say "I grew up evangelical". His friend laughed, and said "damn you grew up in a cult," and we moved on to playing MTG. But that comment rattled around in my brain for months before I realized she was right. I never doubted she was right, but I was finally able to admit it recently.

I am the product of a cult. And I have a lot to overcome if I want to be a halfway decent person. I hope I can achieve it someday.

#personal #outside the shadow #cultural christianity

[thediaryofs0nic]

I have a problem... well... several. I'd say I needed professional help but no thats not it even. I need to go back in time and be taught proper self control as a young kid, I need to be loved by my father, and I need to be taught not to resort to anger in frustration. I dont think people can be perfect but I do think they can be better. I know my mother tried her damndest to be the best mother she could and she achieved it in my eyes. My father on the other hand, to his admittance, was a manipulative, avoidant, asshole who didnt care to watch his mouth or behavior. He thought he was worthy of attempting to control my view on him and the world and he thinks he's succeeded. He is so lost on his narcissistic, egotistical, high horse that he can't see how he's harmed people. He can not see that he is the problem and refuses to feel any important emotions. He suppresses the important ones and expresses the rest in anger. Boys don't cry or at least they do in private because crying is shameful and a sign of weakness. Two genders but you can be whatever you want. I love you yet I'll call you a clown when you finally seem happy. You're brilliant and important but you're not trying hard enough. I've watched you scare away countless people and the only ones you still have are internet trolls or people that need to be around you why tf do you think you don't have friends. My cousin hangs out with you because he likes laughing at your shit takes plus its not like your moral "lessons" are getting through to him he literally has 4 kids all to different women. He isn't too bright.

My parents have also lost themselves into their political ideologies. My mother thinks Ben Shapiro is brilliant and my father wishes death on all Democrats. From the blatant sexism to the upfront racism (all from father) I don't feel safe around him all the time. There are times I remember being in fear of my father drinking a little too much and attempting to kill me. There are times where my father has inadvertently called me useless and said my life wasn't worth anything. ((Context: He said suicidal people/people who commit suicide don't care about anyone and shouldn't have been born to begin with)I was in therapy for my depression and had been sh for a few months at that point) Really racking up the great father points there. When I said I wanted a nose ring he angerly asked if I wanted to be a cow (I just thought they looked cool and I got one the second I turned 18). I was fighting with him about something at the dinner table (I was summoned even when I didn't want to eat with them) and got into a fight over whatever with him and then he interrupted me and started talking to my mother who was crying (because of him) and I responded (because he was only gonna make her feel worse) he didn't let me finish and in a cross, angry, pointed tone through clenched teeth said "not everything is about you" LIKE A FUCKING 4TH GRADER. It made me highly angry so I went up to my room and fumed in my notes app so I could tell my therapist. I hate my father. He also mentioned to me that he wondered what id be like if they didn't give me all the hormones in the milk because he thinks I act the way that I do (feminine and like men) because of the food. He genuinely thought that was a good talking point with me, the queer in the household, his only child, the one person with mental health and identity issues in this house... GO FUCK YOURSELF. God fucking damn it I don't like him at all. He implied my existence wasn't valid or real, that I am not the person I couldve been. I DONT GIVE ANY FUCKING SHITS WHAT I "cOuLDvE BeEn" YOU THOUGHT THAT WAS APPROPRIATE. GO. FUCK. YOUR. SELF. He also told me genderfluid wasn't real for no reason when I had literally thought of going by that. The thing is I NEVER mentioned that anywhere near him, when I said the word and that it made me comfortable to my friends I wasn't even on the same floor level. He wants me to kill myself at this point. I could probably think of more but im too angry now and it's 3 am so maybe ill stop.

(My mother rarely defended me when she was the only one I was comfortable talking to so she knew how I must've felt hearing a lot of those things)

Tldr: I hate my father

Overall conclusion: He will never enter my living space once I move out of this bitch.