#and i grew up in a school where i saw this kinda shit happen regularly

[stevenbasic]

Looking at the IG of one of the new applicants, Dr J thinks: What's this one's story?

About a year ago, huh..?

...

The reunion was in full swing, and Angie sipped the straw of her vodka tonic, alone for the moment at the edge of the crowd, watching him. She’d come into the evening like she did into most crowds: thinking she was the smartest person in the room. True, it’s not like she’d ended up top of her class - it’d been ten years since graduating from Middlesex High with these morons - or had found herself at a top-tier college. She totally could have, she always thought, if she had really wanted to. She just never put in the effort, it hadn’t meant enough to her. But she could have been valedictorian, for sure, right? And gone to an ivy-league? She just never set her mind to it, she told herself. Plus, back then, she didn’t have the tits...

Angie Wade was, certainly, what most people would call a “late bloomer”. Not only had her academic and career successes mainly come after her teen years in High School - she’d graduated with Honors from Bowling Green, got her Masters, and now managed two (soon to be three) branches of KLG Bank - but her figure had taken some time to come in, also. When she had graduated, she had been a mostly forgettable member of the drama club, the thin, unremarkable brunette with the big forehead. But, soon, things changed. Since high school she’d put on - haha - nearly thirty pounds, the majority of it generously deposited into the fleshy curves she’d squeezed into this low-cut black top and tight, tight knee-length white skirt. She wanted these people - him especially - to see what had become of Angie Wade, to realize what they had missed. And, the evening had gone predictably. Most of the girls, even some she’d been friendly with in school, either wanted nothing to do with her or treated her with snobby derision - fuck them. Because every guy she’d spoken to tonight had been very keen to chat. Most had given her at least a fleeting glance down her top, and many could barely keep from staring. But she hadn’t talked to AJ Shaw yet....

...and he was right over there.

...

AJ stood at the banquet hall’s bar, idly stirring his bacardi and coke, while Megan Rommety chatted animatedly in his left ear. He’d learned, among a prattling twenty minutes’ worth of other things, that she was a recent divorcee (“her decision”, to hear her tell it) She was trying to flirt with him, he had no doubt.  He had been excited about coming to this thing, the 10-year reunion for his Middlesex High School Class. He still hung out, pretty regularly, with some friends from the football team; he’d even hired a couple to work on his construction team. He still touched base with old girlfriends from time-to-time, Facebook or wherever; it was cool to see them with kids and flirt with them behind their husbands’ backs. But maybe there’d be some people from out of town to catch up with. Like Megan here: they’d been in a couple classes together, she’d dated a friend of his, been on the tennis team. She was nice to see, for the first few minutes, but now she was beginning to overstay her welcome in the seat next to him. “...anyway, after I kicked Brad out, I sold the house and bought my own condo down by the lake,” Megan was saying, stirring the ice cube in her chardonnay, “sooooo nice. Real hardwood floors, a view. You just have to come see it! In fact, kids are at my mom’s tonight and…” WHoahhh...Who was THAT?

“Yeah, I uh….” he said Wearing a black, low-cut top that revealed an impressive bulge of soft, creamy cleavage, she was smiling over at him, from across the room. In fact, “smile” might have been too soft of a word. There was something dramatic about the look she was giving him, something….yikes. His stomach fluttered and everything Megan was saying was being droned out, dissolving to just a buzz on his left. Taking a sip of her drink, this woman held his eye contact for an uncomfortably long time, before she began to strut over towards him. My god, AJ thought, that is a strut. Straight back and proud, each step in her killer heels brought a new jiggle to her chest and an extra sway to her hips in her tight, white skirt. This was a woman who knew how to walk, he could see that for sure, and draw eyes to herself. Was this someone from his class?? He had forgotten that he was in the middle of a sentence, a conversation. Hell, he practically forgot where he was. He’d kinda found that happening, recently. Pretty women seemed to throw him off base more easily than they used to. Ones with boobs, especially. “Hiya, remember me?” she said, sidling up to the bar and unceremoniously boxing Megan out. He tried to keep his eyes up, on her face, on her wide, wide smile. He knew he would look like an asshole if his eyes dropped to her tits….but it was a struggle. “I…uh” he began, as his mind began to work. He was usually so good at this! He felt like he knew everybody from his class, or at least everyone important. Especially the hot ones! But he was having trouble remembering this one, her name. Her face was sorta familiar, but he certainly didn’t recognize those curves from high school. “Uhmmmm…”

“Angie Wade?”  Megan interjected, from half-behind the newcomer.

Oh yeah, Angela Wade.

“Angie Wade?” AJ finally managed, lights beginning to click on, “You were in drama club, right?” “That’s me!” Angie beamed, biting her lower lip flirtatiously, “You DO remember me!” He...he did remember her, yes, Angie. But certainly not like this. The Angie Wade he remembered had been...skinny. Maybe not quite a dork, but not someone with whom he’d ever associate. If he recalled, his friends had told him she’d been an admirer of his. God, if he’d known she’d grow up into this...wow, she really grew a pair. “Excuse me,” Megan piped in, pushing her short, coiffed-blonde hair behind her ear, “We...were in the middle of a conversation?” Obviously annoyed, Megan could see how AJ’s attention had suddenly been drawn to Angie Wade and her big new tits. “Oh, I’m so sorry,” Angie responded, not bothering to hide a note of condescension. She shifted to unblock Megan from the conversation, a move that just brought her closer to AJ’s left side, and in fact let her press her big right breast into his left arm. She felt him shudder, almost imperceptibly, but tried to keep her smile to herself.

Angie glanced Megan up and down with a coy smirk before turning back to AJ. “So...Nice suit! You look great,” she said, knowing men’s weaknesses for flattery, “Seems like you’re doing well?” “Um, yeah! Thanks!,” AJ replied, wincing as he heard the weird enthusiasm in his voice. He can’t come across as creepy, just talking to this girl ‘cuz she’s built. He knew he had to maintain himself, his composure. “I’ve been good,” he continued, “Staying busy with work and-” Angie cut him off. “Yeah, I saw that your company has a bid in to renovate the stadium downtown,” she said, letting her eyes sparkle in admiration. Men loved that. “That’s soooo great…” They also loved this bimbo talk, she’d learned. “Yeah well, it’s um… an exciting project,” He finished lamely, glancing over at Megan, whose glare had gone icy. What was he doing? This was rude. He should try to involve Megan some more, but found himself just really not wanting to. “But enough about me,” he said to Angie, admiring the dramatically dark makeup around her eyes, “How are you doing?” “I’m doing SO, SO good!” Angie sang, right hand reaching behind AJ’s back, resting on a shoulder. Megan scoffed, watching as her left hand then found his knee. What a tramp. “‘So so good’?” Megan finally snapped, the derision in her voice unmistakable, “Last I heard you were working at Hooters. Brad said he saw you th-” “Oh, did he? Brad, your husband?” Angie smiled, turning finally to address Megan, smile big and white.

“Ex...husband…” Megan said, voice quickly fading.

“Hm. Well, did Brad mention that he used to come in every Tuesday and Thursday for lunch, with guys from work, or sometimes just by himself?” Angie continued, a new edge to her voice, “And when I moved to just weekends, he started showing up then, too?” She smiled as she saw Megan’s eyes go wide. She loved doing this shit to prissy bitches like Megan, when they thought they could flex. “Did Brad tell you that he always asked to be sat in my section, and when I finally left he’d asked the other girls about me? Where I went? Asked for my number?”

Megan’s jaw had started to quiver, and Angie had to keep herself from laughing. She remembered Brad, though it had been awhile. Guys from their old high school had often come to Hooters to drool, whether it was over her or younger girls like Shanette or Missy. Brad had been no different. “I guess he just saw something he liked…. “ Angie concluded, straightening her shoulders and pushing her boobs forward - which drew a glance from AJ, she noticed. “Maybe something he didn’t have at home?” “Holy shit y-you bitch,” Megan sputtered, doing her best to sound appalled but glancing down at her own modest bust, unable to keep from feeling a little inadequate. Yes, Brad had been “a boob guy”... Ignoring the insult with practiced aplomb, Angie turned back to AJ, catching him looking down her top. “Besides, you don’t mind...do you AJ?” she asked him, squeezing her right breast more firmly into his nicely-muscled arm, rubbing his broad shoulder through his suit jacket, “That I used to work at Hooters?” “Um, uh, what?” he stammered, uncomfortable with the tense exchange that had just happened between these two girls, feeling weird that he’d just sat here, passively. How was he supposed to answer this? “No...not at all,” he managed, “I think, uh, service work is perfectly dignified…” “See?” Angie giggled, still rubbing his shoulder and rewarding him with an extra bit of boob, “Good boy.”  Angie giggled again, so pleased with herself. Megan, for herself, looked aghast, watching AJ - who she always thought was a pretty well-put-together guy - fall for this bimbo’s simple little tricks. God, what a pair of tits can do... “I…” “..was just leaving” Angie finished for her, fixing her with a bright white smile and withering stare. She watched as Megan took her drink and stood from her stool. “You gonna go call Brad?” she added, for good measure, “Tell him Angie from Hooters said hello.” “Tell him yourself,” Megan sneered, and then turned to him, “And, AJ, nice talking to you. Have fun with the Titty Monster.” With that she stomped off, and Angie’s smile curled.

“‘Titty Monster’”, Angie repeated, chuckling to herself, “That’s rich. I think I’ll use that.” She bit her lip, narrowed her eyes. “So….” she began, turning all her attention back on AJ, her high school crush. She almost couldn’t believe it herself: here she was, little Angie Wade, proudly claiming Aaron Joseph Shaw for herself, just because she could. It was like wrapping him around her little finger. “Can I have a seat?” “Oh, uh, yeah,” AJ replied, shaking his head. What was wrong with him? He hadn’t even said goodbye to Megan. “Of course…”

AJ half-stood, chivalrously, as if to help Angie up into Megan’s now-empty chair. He sat back, finally, and began to order them both a drink from the bartender with the dramatic mustache.

“Two vodka tonics, please,” Angie had insisted, speaking over him with a will that made his loins clinch.

From there, the flirting began in earnest, disguised by a conversation about their jobs. Angie avoided divulging too much about her situation, her successes at the bank. She knew the male ego could be a fragile thing, and she didn’t want to scare him away. AJ seemed to be a successful guy himself, in his own way, but boys tended to like their girls dumb, and she could play that up a bit when she needed to. So, no mention of the degrees, no mention of the awards. Instead, she had leaned forward towards him just enough to open her cleavage for his approval. 

God, she has great tits, he thought to himself, marveling at their swell and mass, and I’m really getting to be a tit-guy these days. His eyes just could not keep themselves from falling down her top, and she seemed not to mind in the least. In fact, after their second drink together, her hand had found its way back to his knee and seemed to give him an encouraging squeeze every time his gaze strayed to her chest. She...she actually likes that I’m looking at her tits, he finally convinced himself, and had slowly started to relax.

After another drink, Angie finally sat up, stock straight, and slowly stretched her shoulders back to look around the room. Some of their old classmates had begun to leave, and the room was less abuzz than it had been. Predictably, his eyes had gone straight to her chest, and shot away before she met his gaze again. She waited for him to talk, knowing exactly what he wanted.

“So, it looks like things are starting to quiet down here,” he finally asked, “do you, uh, need a ride?”

Bingo. “No, I drove myself,” she answered, watching his face, seeing the old gears turning. 

“Well, I was thinking about, y’know,” he began again, poking at the remaining ice in his drink,  “heading back to my loft, downtown, if you wanted to, like, come with me…?” Angie smiled, and leaned in towards him, squeezing her arms together in a dramatic show of cleavage. “Hmmm, well,” she purred, watching his eyes struggle to maintain her gaze, “how about you come to my place tonight sweetie. It’s closer....” 

At that, she leaned in to his ear, and whispered into it with a voice thick with seduction. “And I still have my Hooters outfit at home. I can try it on for you….see if it still fits?” 

============================================

Angie attacks! A little GITJ tangent thread being co-written with AgeoftheGiantess, who you may know from GTScity. Look for her story to continue.

Next post, our first entry by new contributor Joyce Julep, available at my Patreon

#Growing Into the Job

[silverselfshippingchaos]

❝ you put your arm around me and i literally felt my knees buckle, this is so pathetic. ❞ with Felix!! :>

*evil laughs* This one excites me because it is SO Felix. I’ve been putting off writing this for a while because ✨school✨ but I’m so excited that I finally have some free time!!! I have a few ideas for this one!!! One is during the academy phase and the other during the war phase. Academy Felix really cracks me up, he’s just so awkward. Luckily, academy Ash is just as awkward as usual. They blend well. 

Most of this was written at insane hours of the night, so I apologize in advance for typos. 

This came out so much longer than I expected omg i am so sorry I swear I didn’t mean to make this almost 5k words-

~~~~~~

Ash finds herself out of breath after an intensive sparring battle with Felix, a friend she’s made at the Officer’s Academy. She and him have found themselves sparring regularly for majority of their school year so far. And every single day, just seeing him made her feel so happy. Goddess, he was so cute! The son of Duke Fraldarius... She was well aware of how unrealistic it would be for him to get together with the daughter of some random merchants, but she never stopped imagining. She takes a deep breath. “Alright!” Ash starts, her chest rising and falling heavily, “I think we should call it a day, yeah? Professor went kinda damn overboard with the homework today, and I’m tired as hell. Need to pick out a dress for the ball, too.” She wipes the sweat from her forehead, running her hands through her hair, adjusting her ponytail.

“That’s fine.” Felix says, tossing his training sword in her direction. She catches it (barely) and places it along with her own back in the corner where they were stored. “Welp, Imma head out. See ya during meal time, Lix! I’ll be in my room if you need me.” She gives him a small wave before turning around and walking towards the large, wooden door. 

“Wait.”

“What's up?” She turns around, “Need something?”

“You... You don’t have a date for the ball this moon, am I correct?” Asks Felix, taking a sip of water from the flask he always carried around. He leans back against one of the many stone pillars of the training grounds.

Ash notices how his dark hair falls into his face, his bun messy from training. He was so gorgeous... She tilts her head to the side in confusion. “Yeah, why? Is the pretty Gautier boy trying to set me up again? Tell him I'm not interested. I mean, he’s a great friend and all, but I have eyes for someone els-”

“Be my date.” He says, interrupt her. He brushes a stray strand of his hair away from his face, tucking it behind his ear. Ash notes how soft it looks.

Ash just blinks. “I-I’m sorry, what?” She must have misheard, she could've sworn she just heard Felix ask her out. Her heart was pounding in her throat. 

“You heard me. Be my date.” Says Felix again. 

Ash feels her cheeks get warm. Felix. The Felix Hugo “I’ll always be more comfortable holding a sword than a woman’s hand” Fraldarius had just asked her out. “Goddess, I would love to!” She wraps her arms around him in a tight hug. He finds himself quickly inhaling, his breath stuck in his throat as he freezes. He was tense.

But he didn’t hate her touch. He hadn’t really been touched since... He didn’t like talking about it.

“I never thought you’d ask. Never even thought you’d be interested in, well, social gatherings, or asking people out, for that matter.” She’s smiling so wide, and Felix can’t help but to stare. “I-I just... Don’t want any creeps making moves on you. Comforting you would be a bother, so I’d rather keep you where I know you’ll be safe. That’s all. No other reason!” He takes a deep breath and she giggles. Giggles. How dare she giggle and how dare she be so damn cute about it?!?! She was so small and her hair smelt so good. Her breath smelled like those peppermints she always carried around with her. He wanted to hear that giggle again and again, feel her in his arms forever, he wanted her to always smile. All for him. “Thanks so much, Felix. I've actually... wanted this for a while.” She only holds him tighter. He felt so good.

Lost within his fantasies, his knees buckle under him. He awkwardly places his hands on her back. She was so warm... What was he feeling?! He feels his heart flutter in his chest. Why is the world is my face so warm?! He wasn’t a huge believer, but he found himself praying to the Goddess that Ash couldn’t feel how fast his heart was beating. She looks up at him, blinking at him with those warm, brown eyes of her. He only feels warmer. He wouldn’t mind staring into them forever. “Are you... okay? You’re shaky.” She asks. Her face was a bit red too, her tan cheeks flushed with color.

Love, romance, they were all distractions. Felix knew that. His only goal was to become stronger. But she was so... cute?! Felix felt weak. 

“Shut up. I’m fine. Ugh. You put your arms around me and I felt my knees buckle... How pathetic. This is so stupid!” He yells, bringing his arm away from her back to rub at his temples.

Fuck, did I do something wrong? I knew I shouldn't have hugged him.. “Oh, I’m so sorry!” She says, immediately backing away from him, bringing her arms back to her side. “I-I’ll get going now!” 

“No!” He says, a bit too enthusiastic, “Don’t go!” She blinks, dumbfounded. “Felix, are you blushing?! What’s gotten into you?!” He covers his face with his hands, “I don’t know, shut up! I’m not blushing, I’m just...” He was at a loss for words, and Ash couldn’t help but shyly cover her face as well. He was so cute when he got shy. It rarely happened, but the way his face gets all red and how he stumbled over his words... So fucking cute. “Just what?!” She questions.

“I’m, um, I don’t know! This is all your fault, why are you so cute?!” One of Felix’s hands slaps over his mouth, but it was too late. “You think I’m... cute?” Ash blinks, her eyes wide.

“You're so slow! You make Sylvain look smart!” He grumbles. “Just, um, meet me at the ball, okay?! That’s all!”

Ash was shocked by just how red he was. Being that red was possible?! Her face felt as hot as the sun, “Oh fucking hell, you’re cute too, damnit!” She blurts.

Never in any of Felix’s 18 years of life has he ever has a crush, but that had officially changed. She called him cute?! What?! If Felix stayed in the training grounds for one more moment, he felt as if he was going to combust. “Felix, you’re worrying me. It's a bit concerning when you see your favorite person here look like the personification of a tomato. I think you're cute too, okay? That's all. If you wanna put this behind us, we can." Says Ash, pushing her red glasses up her nose. Felix notices how small her hands are. Gentle and soft. He wanted to hold them.

"No. I don't. I want to stay with you. You make me happy. But don't you dare tell anyone I said that, got it?" Felix sighs, glad to finally have that off his chest.

She nods. "I feel the same."

Okay, Felix. Deep breaths. I can do this.

"Then date me."

~~~~~~~

The next few days leading up to the ball were strange, yet comforting. Ash and Felix still sparred everyday, and the blush on Felix's cheeks only grew. Ash would spend all day thinking about him and how sweet he is.

Balls were a fairly new event for Ash. Yeah, she had attended several somewhat fancy parties, but this was a large scale ball at Garreg Mach. It was the only time where all of the students could get out of their uniforms and truly get a chance to get themselves all dolled up.

Ash had gone dress shopping with a close friend of hers, Sylvain. Sylvain has insisted on tagging along since Ash told him about what happened at the training grounds. Well, actually, it was more like her screaming about how happy she was instead of actually speaking, but that's besides the point.

"You guys aren't gonna coordinate your outfits or anything?" Sylvain asks, walking next to Ash in the shopping district of a nearby town.

Ash shrugs, "Nah, I think we're just gonna meet up and spend the night together."

Sylvain smirks. "As my father always says, no heirs before you're marri-"

Ash rolls her eyes. "Sylvain, shut up. We just started dating."

He chuckles, "Yeah, yeah. Still kind of shocked about that. It's rare seeing him not be... bitchy. He always goes on and on about how love is a waste of time. Now look at him!" Sylvain claps his hands together in excitement, "Anyways, I've heard good things about this shop. A couple girls have been talking about it on our dates and stuff. Let's see what we can find you!"

Although shopping was somewhat difficult, mostly because of Sylvain aggressively flirting with the shopkeeper, Ash certainly wasn't complaining about the discount that they got on her dress. It was long and it reached her toes, emerald in color. Her favorite color. Part of her debated wearing a suit, but she was starstruck when she saw the dress. She gently ran her hand over the expensive fabric. Damn... The jewels sewn into the skirt were simply dazzling. all the work seemed to be hand-stitched. She fell in love at first sight. Luckily, Sylvain seemed to agree and ushered her to the changing rooms, insisting that she try it on. His jaw dropped to the floor when he saw her in the dress. She looked stunning. 

“Do I, uh, look alright?” She asks, doing a small twirl. Sylvain just blinks. “You look more than alright. If Felix doesn’t love it, then clearly his eyes don’t work.”

She smiles at the compliment, but then gasps. "Holy shit, Sylvain! This thing has pockets!" That was all she needed to know that this dress was the one. She bought the dress. It left her pockets feeling significantly lighter than they were before she arrived at the shop, but it was so worth it. She felt ecstatic.

~~~~~~

Felix groaned in anger, tugging at his hair in front of his mirror. Why isn’t it sitting right?! He couldn’t count the amount of times he’d tied his hair up in his usual bun, but it never looked right. Normally he kept his bun a bit messy. After all, why would his outwards appearance matter? Was his face going to fight battles for him? But Ash had complimented his hair so much, maybe he’d ought to make it look nice just this one time. He’d hate to disappoint her. He already knew that she was going to look stunning, she always does. He ties it up once again. That’s not even centered! 

“Ugh!” Felix yanks the hair tie out of his hair, and hears a snap. He looks down at the broken tie and sighs, tossing it into the trash can under his desk. He grabbed one of the spares he always kept there just in case (after all, training was so annoying with his hair in the way) and takes a deep breath. He bites the hair tie between his teeth, his slender fingers twisting his hair into a bun. He holds it in place with one hand and grabs the tie with the other, securing it in place. Then he needed some pins and some hair oil... 

And just to make things clear, Felix only had so many hair products for, um, training reasons. Nothing else. 

He takes a deep breath, backing away from his mirror. He looks down at his suit and gently brushes it off, looking at himself in the mirror. Hm. Not bad. Now he had to wait for Ash to arrive at their meeting spot, the courtyard just outside of the reception hall. Part of him was thankful for his dark blue suit. It was easy to move in, and far more comfortable than some of the other outfits he had worn over the years to special events, reserved for only the most esteemed nobles. He adjusts his sleeves. Why was his heart beating so fast? Why was he so nervous?! He tried his hardest to stay undetected on his journey to their meeting spot. If anyone, especially one of his classmates, were to see him this fancied up, he was well aware of how much they’d tease him. He wasn’t a big fan of loud noises, and the crowds upon crowds of students only irritated him.

Felix takes a deep breath, the air chilly against his face and hands. “She better hurry. I don’t have all the time in the world.” 

~~~~~~

Ash was stressing out. Getting the dress on was a hassle in it of itself. “Why is the hell is the skirt so damn puffy?!” She yells, trying to find out which hole was for her arms and which for her head. She lets out a sigh on relief. Okay, we got this. She looks at her own reflection. “Damn... I look decent.” A small smile made its way to her face, but it immediately slipped away. 

Did her makeup look okay? Does it need more green? Or am I overdoing it? More glitter? Eh... She reaches for her brushes again. Maybe a bit more dark green would help..? Shadows are good. “You gotta add dimension, sis... Gotta blend...” She mutters to herself under her breath. A small little touch up on her blush... A bit of pink to the lips... “Okay! I think we can put this away now...” She packs up her makeup palettes, putting them back into her drawers. Time for the most stressful part. Ash loved jewelry, and accessorizing could bring a lot of life to an outfit if done well. She sorts through unless pairs of earrings. After much debate, she settles on some silver ones, emerald in them. She’s quite proud of how much her jewelry collection has expanded over the years. Her parents weren’t filthy rich, but they were some decently well-known merchants. Her mother would always buy her jewelry items for her birthdays. I should write a letter to mom and dad soon... 

Necklace time. The stress was eating away at her. Ash always was a bit on-edge, but making decisions...? Not the best couple, to put it simply. “The silver one would match my earrings, so... But the bronze one has a little moon on it...”

She looks back into the mirror. Silver necklace it was. Ash looks down at her hands. Too bare. She picked out her favorite ring, one that she bought herself quite recently. It’s silver, so it should look alright... She tilts her head to the side. “Would two rings be overkill..?” She puts the rings aside. Okay, now we need bracelets... 

She was shocked by the sound of footsteps in front of her first-floor dorm with lots of chatter to accompany them. The other students were already heading to the ball?! “Oh fucking hell!” She grabs a random one from her box and kicks on some casual boots. Not appropriate for her dress, but the dress was long enough. And she valued comfort. She slides on the bracelet. String. Dark blue and thin, a small charm of a star on it. She rushes out of her room and begins to make her way to the courtyard. 

~~~~~~

Felix is looking up at the sky. It's somewhat chilly, but being from northern Faerghus, he didn't mind it. After all, he hadn't been standing here for long. Knowing Ash, she probably got her head stuck in some random book again. Cute.

He hears footsteps. A small smirk makes its way onto his face. "Felix! Hey!" It was her. Her voice always got so high pitched when she was excited, Felix loved the sound of it. He continued to stare up at the sky. "Hello, how are yo-" He looks down at her. From the huge gown, the bright makeup to the rings on her fingers, she looked... breathtaking. "Wow." He blinks. "You don't look bad at all." He says.

Ash smiles. That's the best you can get from a guy like Felix. She looks him and up down. His suit, dark blue, just the slightest bit tight, hugging his body. She looks at his hair, and how it looked like it took so time consuming. "You look so good, Felix."

Felix smiles softly, "Thanks." He holds out his hand, which she takes gratefully. He holds her hand tight, gently bringing it up to his lips. She feels her face go warm. "A-Anyways. Let's go inside. Don't want you catching a cold, that dress looks thin. I hope you're prepared to dance." Says Felix, walking towards the door to the reception hall.

"You see, Felix..." Starts Ash, stopping her moments completely. He looks back at her. "I, uh, don't know how to dance." She admits. "Tch, how pathetic. I guess I'll teach you then." Felix rolls his eyes, opening the door for her. "Wow, how gentlemanly~!" Teases Ash, walking through the door.

"Ballroom dancing isn't too difficult, you should be fine." Felix explains, leading her to the dancefloor. They receive a few odd looks, but one stare back from Felix made them stop. "Got it. How do you know so much about this, anyway? Never took you for the dancer type." Shrugs Ash, brushing down her skirt.

"Trust me, I'm not. Had to take classes as a kid. Had that shit buried into my brain, I don't think I'll soon forget. My brother also really enjoyed- Nevermind. I said nothing. No use talking about someone who's long dead. Maybe if they took swordplay more seriously than dancing of all things, they wouldn't be a bunch of damn fools. But oh well, basic knowledge of ballroom dancing is a bit of a requirement for nobles. It's stupid, I know." Ash nods, but she felt a pang in her heart upon seeing the pure sadness on Felix's face as he brought up his brother.. "I mean, if you can't beat 'em in a fight, maybe you can knock them out with your, uh, rocking moves?"

"Ugh, you are the worst." Groans Felix, but Ash didn't miss the smile on his face. "Anyways," He sighs, "Give me your other hand. Follow my lead."

"Okay, I can do that"

"And don't you dare step on my toes, are we clear?"

"Eh, no promises."

"Idiot."

Ash smirks. "Your idiot."

~~~~~~

"Ugh!" Ash plops down onto a chair away from the bustling dance floor, "I am fucking exhausted. Dancing has no right being that hard."

Felix sits down right next to her on a nearby chair, "Having your toes constantly stepped on is quite hard too, I'll have you know."

She reaches over and grabs his hand, rubbing small circles into it with her thumb. "Hey, I'm sorry! Maybe you shouldn't have put your feet where I was gonna put mine." She laughs. Felix stares at her. That was his favorite sound.

"Hmph. If you keep being that inattentive in the battlefield, youre going to get yourself killed." He sighs, "Don't you dare die on me."

She smiles, "I won't. I mean, how can I when I have someone so strong watching my back?"

Felix feels his face heat up. "You're not horrible, though. You're good at keeping a steady rhythm. Perhaps professor should've chose you to represent the Blue Lions at the White Heron Cup." He adds.

"Oh, thanks. It was pretty fun, dancing with you. We should dance again sometime, yeah?" She looks up at him, her dark brown eyes shining in the lights. “And I personally think that you would be so much better for the White Heron Cup. I mean, you’re not a horrible mage and your skills with a sword are unrivaled. And hey, if I were to see you in the dancer outfit, I’d be motivated for sure, if ya know what I mean.” She smirks and gives him a small wink. Felix can't help but stare. Why is she so beautiful?! And why the hell am I suddenly so flustered?! This is pathetic...

“You are such a fool.” He rolls his eyes. 

“Oh yeah? And you’re blushing.” She points out,

“It’s just... really hot here! Maybe we should get out of here? You once mentioned that you liked walking around during nightfall, so... I thought it’d be nice. And it’s also very loud here. Need some respite.” Suggests Felix. 

Ash gasps, “You remember that?! You’re the sweetest. I’d love to.” She wraps her arms around his body, pulling him close. 

“Goddess, you are so touchy....... Don’t you dare stop.”

“I won’t. I love being close to you. You make me feel so safe.” Ash holds his hand and plays with his fingers. She was surprised by how soft they were, considering how much he fights and trains. They seemed to interlock perfectly with her own. 

Felix was still getting used to being held and touched. He hasn’t been big on physical contact since he was a child, and nowadays, it usually just made him feel uncomfortable. But he didn’t mind Ash’s touch. It was soft and loving. It made him happy. 

“Follow me. I found a place I think you’ll like.” Felix says, cautiously walking towards the exit. Surely it wouldn’t be too difficult to sneak out. All of the staff were much too busy to notice the absence of two students. 

~~~~~~

“A tower? This is what you wanted to show me? It’s really pretty.” Ash questions. 

Felix nods. “This is the Goddess Tower. There’s a nice view from the top.” Felix begins to rush up the steps, and Ash tries her best to follow. But with her dress getting in the way and the sheer amount of steps to climb, she found herself tripping. “Slow down, damnit!” She yells. 

“You are so slow!” Felix sighs and climbs down a few steps to where she was. He picks her up, one hand under her knees and the other supporting her head. “Oh my-” She started screaming as he began to run about the stairs again. “Shh, shut up!” He whispers. “I don’t think you’re realizing that we’re not supposed to be caught here.”

“Okay, okay.” Ash wraps her arms around him, resting her hands on the silky fabric of his suit jacket. “Just don’t drop me, got it? You may be one of my favorite people, but that in no way, shape, or form will stop me from sticking a fucking Thoron up your ass!"

Felix snorts. And starts laughing. Actually laughing. Not one of his usual cocky chuckles, but a full on laugh. 

Ash had never heard him laugh before, but it was now her favorite sound in the world. Music to her ears. 

“Your laugh is really cute.”

Felix went red.

~~~~~~

“Here.” Says Felix, lowering Ash back onto her feet. She smiles, “Thank you so much, you didn’t have to.” He was panting softly, “It was nothing. Welcome to the Goddess Tower.”

She looks around the dark tower, moss and vines on the walls, “Woah, it’s so nice here. It’s a great view. The monastery and the town, the stars... Thanks for bringing me here.” She looks up at the stars. The softness of her eyes made Felix feel warm. 

“Have you heard the legend of the Goddess Tower?” Felix asks, “That if you make a pledge, it will be fulfilled? Childish, I know. But if it were true...” 

She smiles, “That’s actually kinda cool. Let’s make a pledge to the Goddess, then.”

“I pledge to...” Felix stops, lost in thought. “Become the strongest warrior in all of Fódlan.” 

Ash nods, “I admire that. You’re very passionate about your pursuit of strength, I’ve always loved that about you. You know what you want and you’ll do a lot to get it. And if you don’t mind me asking, why is it that you want to become so strong?”

“I...” He awkwardly rubs the back of his neck, “I’ve never really thought about that. The weak die, the strong live on. Grow strong so you may live, and live to grow stronger. I don’t want to be weak. I don’t want to... die. I don’t want to lose. I can’t lose. I’ve already lost so much. Mother....” He hesitates. “Brother. And now I just have one more thing that I can’t lose.” He whispers. 

Ash pulls him in for a small hug, “Thanks for opening up to me, I know that talking about your feeling sucks, I get it. Are you okay with sharing what that new thing is?”

“You. Obviously.” 

Ash’s eyes go wide, “Oh. I don’t want to lose you either.”

“Anyways, what’s your pledge?” Asks Felix, “I can’t be the only one making one.”

“I pledge to...” Ash blinks, shivering from the cold of the night. “I’m not sure. I don’t really know what I want in my life. I want to... be happy, I guess. I want my name to go down in history. I don’t want to be forgotten. That’s one of my biggest fears, actually. I want people to remember me, I want to lead a life that makes me happy. Not what my parents want, not what my sister wants, what I want. I won’t be forgotten. I will be happy. I’ll live a life that makes me proud to be me. I pledge that to the Goddess.” She sighs, her breath foggy in the air. She feels a gentle warmth drape over her shoulders. Felix adjusts his suit jacket so that it covers her. “Is that better? I’d hate for my favorite sparring partner to catch a cold.”

The jacket was so warm. A bit too big for her, but it felt so nice. And it smelled just like Felix, too. She felt loved. “A lot better. But what about you? Aren’t you going to get cold?” She asks, taking off the jacket and giving it back to him. He refuses, pushing the fabric back into her arms. “You need it more than I do. I’m good with the cold, I grew up training during snow storms.” 

“Welp, thanks then.” She looks up at him, and he was looking right back down at her. It was dark, but she felt safe. 

“An interesting pledge... I won’t let you be forgotten. We’ll be happy, I know it. It’s difficult, I know, but I have you now. And you have me.” Felix cups her face in his hands, leaning in slightly. 

“Thank you.” I’m not rushing this, am I? “Felix, I... I love you.”

His amber eyes go wide, dark in the lighting of the night. O-Oh.. 

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have sai-” Ash starts, backing away. 

He pulls her close and kisses her. 

Ash freezes in his arms for a moment before kissing back. No way. No way in hell... The kiss was awkward and messy, but it felt so right. 

Felix pulls away after what felt like an eternity of pure bliss. Her lips tasted like peppermint, and they were so soft against his own. He was glad that she couldn’t see the blush on his face. “I love you too, moron.”

“Oh. Wow. Oh my. I can’t believe this is happening, holy shit.” Ash says, laughing. “That was my first time kissing someone...”

“Oh? You spend all your time with that flirting dimwit, so that’s quite shocking. It was... my first time kissing someone too.” Felix admits. 

“Looks like it’s a lot different than the romance novels describe it, huh?” Ash smiles, getting on the tips of her toes to reach his lips. She kisses him again. 

Felix can’t stop smiling. This was the best night ever. 

“It’s getting late and cold. Everyone else is heading back, too. I’ll walk you back to your room, alright?”

Ash nods and Felix takes her hand in his own, his heart still pounding fast in his chest. It took a while to get back to Ash’s room, considering how high up they were, but the silence was a comfortable one.

“And we’re here!” Says Ash when they arrive in front of her room. The smile on her face hasn’t faded in the slightest, and seeing her happy made Felix feel like he was flying. “Thank you so much for tonight, Lixie.” She giggles. 

“Lixie, huh? That’s a new one. You usually just stick with Lix.” 

“Nah, Lixie’s cuter. Cute nickname for a cute guy, am I right?”

“Ugh.” Felix smiles, “Just go to bed, you halfwit.”

“One more thing!” Ash pulls him down for a quick kiss. Felix smiles, he smiles bigger than he has in a long time. “Tonight was nice. Sleep well, okay?” He ruffles her hair and starts walking away.

“Wait!” She yells. Felix turns around. She slides the jacket off her shoulders and holds it out for him to grab. He shakes his head no, “Keep it. It looks better on you.” And with that, he walks back to his own dorm. 

He couldn’t sleep that night. He kept replaying the memory of her kissing him again and again in his head. “I am so pathetic... Acting like some stupid pup over some silly girl...” He smiles. “I love her.”

Little did he know, she couldn’t sleep either. The moment Felix left, Ash squealed into her pillow. His soft hair, his sharp eyes, stupid smirk, soothing voice... He was so perfect. 

~~~~~~

#oop #my hand slipped #i didnt mean to make this so long awsjfhailwenf #writing felix always kinda scares me because i tend to write him so soft?? even though he's actually a really huge jerk?? #so im a bit anxious posting this #twas a lot of fun to write though #i enjoyed it #thank you vv much for the ask hehe #answered #me x the boys #bunny 💙🦁

[thotwonu]

‘til the casket drops... pt. 1

the rest of Katia’s day went normally. her mind kept circling back to the boy who would come in earlier. she could practically hear her sister’s voice telling her to go to the old mayor’s estate house down the block and make up some reason to talk to the man some more. actually...Katia picked up her phone and called her sister. “what have i told you about that Maya?” she huffed as soon as her sister answered. her sister’s giggle tinkled across the phone. “don’t think so loud and maybe i wouldn’t be able to hear your thoughts.” Katia’s eyes shot up to the door where her twin sister was leaning.

the squeal that spilled from her lips was something she would deny to her grave, but she ran across the store and tossed herself into her sister’s arms. “fuck i’ve missed you!” Katia just held onto her twin for a second and let her calming aura fill her. it only lasted a second though because the comfort of family was overwhelmed by the thrumming of excitement in Amaya. “alright, spit it out. what’s got you so excited? also why are you even home? what happened to mr. muse or whatever his name was?” Amaya was jumping, practically vibrating. her aura around her was pulsing like a disco light, Katia almost had to squint to look at her sister. “he came home with me!” Katia’s eyes grew wide. her stomach flipped and for a second she wondered if the man she’d met earlier had been her sister’s musician friend and her stomach dropped. “god Kat no! he was a friend of my boyfriend’s but no. Brandon is sooooo not my type. i mean i’ve only met the guy like once but still.” 

the way Amaya rolled her eyes before smirking at her sister made Katia wanna hide. “you really liked him?” Amaya’s eyes sparkled with mischief and Katia just turned around and walked back behind the counter with her sister hot on her heels. “i don’t know what you’re talking about Maya. who is Brandon?” Katia winced at her own words. anyone who has ever had a sister knows how nosy the can be. but having one that could actually read your mind, literally the worst. “oh my god Kat, you’re ridiculous. c’mon, let’s close the store early and head over.” Katia turned to face her sister with terror in her eyes, “nope, no thanks. i’m good.”

***

meanwhile in the mayor’s estate...

when Brandon made it back to the house he could have sworn he saw Katia walking out of the house, except this girl had her hair down and was wearing a completely different outfit, and also there was no way Katia could have made it to the house before him. he walked inside and noticed Edwin standing in the doorway and pointed at the girl, “who is-??” the smile on Edwin’s face told him enough. Brandon’s stomach dropped. if that was Katia, why had she given him her number before? “her name is Amaya, she’s kinda the one who hooked us up with the place. her family is from here. she missed her sister, so when we started talking about vacation i suggested here to Austin and he found this place and she hooked us up with the mayor for a discount.” Edwin was sitting on a couch with stars in his eyes, or maybe hearts? Brandon laughed to himself and sat next to his friend, “so you’re the real reason why we’re in Halloweentown.” Edwin’s grin didn’t slip from his face, “dude, i think i love her.”

Brandon’s look softened. “she clearly makes you happy dude. how long have y’all been together? i didn’t even know you had a girl.” his friend’s face fell a little, “it’s been a few months, you actually met her once, but B, you’re barely around anymore. no one can get you out of the studio. this vacation is lowkey our intervention. we want our boy back.” a hum of agreement came from the doorway, “man we’re proud of you for everything you’re doing, but you’re a damn workaholic.” Zion sat himself on the couch across from them and looked around the room. “i really wish this wasn’t where we came for this damn thing though. this house gives me the fucking creeps.” Brandon had to admit, though the rest of the town looked modern enough, this house was creepy as hell. the Victorian architecture was stunning, but the furnishings were so old world that Brandon kept feeling like the pictures were watching him and that he might break something.

realizing he still had his bag in his hand from his little shopping trip he held it out from Zion, “speaking of you. i was in town and i found this little like spice shop thing, anyway, the girl who worked there sold me some stuff to help you and Nick sleep. she said this should help with the nightmares you’ve been having too,” he handed Zion a little bottle of blended oils. Zion raised  an eyebrow skeptically, but accepted the bottle. “thanks man, i guess i’ll try it tonight.” next to him Edwin was bouncing in his seat with the grin back on his face, “so what’s she like? Amaya talks about her all the time. she owns the store by the way, she doesn’t just work there.” it took Brandon a minute to figure out what the fuck Edwin was on about. when the light bulb clicked on he blushed and ducked his head, “so they are twins then.” Edwin laughed and clapped his friend’s shoulder, “is that a blush? bro, that’s adorable.”

Zion was grinning on the couch across from them, “tell us about her then. if she looks like Amaya we know she’s pretty. but what’s got you blushing lover boy?” both of the boys leaned in closer to Brandon trying to see what they could get outta the boy. “ooh, Brandon met a girl? what a miracle.” a third voice entered the room and Brandon groaned hiding his face in his hands. “are we teasing B? this is my favorite game.” the final member of their quintet entered the room and Brandon wanted the couch to suck him into it like a black hole. “Brandon met Maya’s twin and she’s got him all blushy,” Z offered to Nick and Austin who had found spots on the couch next to him. 

“did everyone know Amaya but me?” Brandon asked trying to change the subject even a little. “like Edwin said earlier, you been MIA bro.” the boys around the room got a little quiet and nodded. “we could all see you slipping away into the work B. you’ve been missing so much.” Austin’s sad but supportive smile made Brandon sigh. “i really didn’t realize. i’m really sorry guys.” Nick smiled at the group, “look at us. all 5 of us together in one room! honestly like, you’d think we didn’t all live together regularly with how little we all hang out anymore.” the other guys laughed as a sense of brotherhood settled over them. “oh yeah, dude, i got you some stuff at the shop too.” he pulled out the shower melts and handed them over to Nick. “Katia said that if you put one of those in the shower with you the vapors should help get you to sleep.” his friend nodded, “honestly, if we weren’t in this creepy ass house it’d probably help too.”

a knock on the door pulled the boys out of their comfortable banter. “don’t think you’re off the hook tellin’ us about you’re new girl bro,” Nick said hopping off the couch and going to open the door. there was no one there, but a weird note was taped to the door. “okay, i’m ready to leave this town. it’s creepy as hell,” Zion said reading the note over Nick’s shoulder. it was in weird calligraphy and on faded paper. “literally someone translate this shit please,” Edwin said throwing his hands up in the air. “it says, stay away from she who walks in darkness. the river is stronger than she appears, death to those who are entranced by her beauty. the darkness hides in her waves,” Austin said before looking up at the boys who were all giving him funny looks, “what? i took a calligraphy class in high school. it’s not that hard to read.” Brandon ignored the weirdness that was Austin, before turning back to the note, “so the town has a killer mermaid?”

the group broke out into various theories about what the note could possibly mean. “i told you we shouldn’t have come to this creepy ass town,” Nick yelled above everyone. “you can’t really believe that there’s something supernatural going on here?” Edwin scoffed at his friend. “maybe not supernatural, but there is some nut job out there who thinks so,” Zion backed up Nick’s earlier statement. “guys, it’s probably just some kids playing a prank, this houses is known for being haunted, they’re probably just trying to freak us out because we’re tourists basically,” Austin argued back. “Katia, mentioned this place was called Ye Olde Haunted House...” Brandon shrugged. “it’s not actually called that,” Austin rolled his eyes and made the boys all sit down while he told the story of the house.

he cleared his throat and put on mood lighting, turning all the lights down and lighting some candles. “listen if Austin starts chanting i’m out,” Edwin said pointing to the door. Austin flipped him off and began the story. “when the town was first founded, this was the governor’s mansion, nowadays that position is the mayor, anyway so he lived here with his wife and three sons, and it was during the witch trials, there was a lot of tension between the locals because accusations were being tossed around. basically the eldest of the three sons was seduced by a local girl, her name has kinda been lost, but basically she wasn’t noble, and when she got pregnant, she was accused of witchcraft. like in the sense that the only way a highborn man would sleep with her was if she used magic, anyway she fled before her trial and wasn’t heard from ever again. the eldest son married a rich girl and they had a son. within a year every man in the entire family was dead. the rumors now are that those men haunt this house, and that they died because the scorned witch girl put a curse on the family.”

“that doesn’t explain the killer mermaid in the note dude,” Brandon piped up. Austin rolled his eyes, “i don’t know dude. i only do ghosts, not killer mermaids.” the boys all groaned and rolled their eyes. “as fun as this has all been, i’ve got a girlfriend to go hang out with,” Edwin stood from the couch and waved as he walked to grab a coat. “what the fuck man! this is supposed to be a boys trip! she’s supposed to be visiting her sister!” Nick yelled from the couch. “we can all hang out later! i’ll have her bring Katia so Brandon can get all blushy again,” Edwin teased as he walked out the door.

Brandon thought about seeing the girl again and didn’t mind at all. he took out his phone and sent off a text, apparently, my best friend is dating your sister, so you wanna hang tonight with us at the big bad haunted mansion? her response was quicker than he expected, my sister has already informed me that i don’t have a choice in the matter. don’t drink anything she offers you though... Brandon laughed at the message and sent off a few more texts before pocketing his phone. he thought again about the note that had been taped on the door. “hey what’s Amaya and Katia’s last name?” he asked the boys who remained. “Rivera, why?” Zion said looking away from the corner of the room he’d been staring at suspiciously for a few minutes. Brandon shrugged it off... 

Katia and Amaya Rivera...

#prettymuch #prettymuch imagines #prettymuch headcanons #prettymuch concepts #prettymuch blurbs #prettymuch au #prettymuch spooky #spookymuch #spooky season #til the casket drops #brandon arreaga #brandon arreaga imagines #brandon arreaga concepts #brandon arreaga headcanons #brandon arreage blurbs #edwin honoret #edwin honoret headcanons #edwin honoret imagines #edwin honoret concepts #edwin honoret blurbs

[explcsivcs]

––––– ( jacob elordi, cismale, he/him ) i just saw CASEY O'NEILL walking down the street’s of provincetown the other day playing WATCH ME by JADEN out loud. rumor has it that the TWENTY-TWO year old is +CHARISMATIC, but can also be -RECKLESS — overall they’re a CRIMSON. they remind me of THE SOUND OF A REVVING CAR ENGINE, BOTTLE ROCKETS AT MIDNIGHT, NEUTRAL COLOR SCHEMES, and EMPTY MOVIE THEATERS.  –– it’s your local idiot, here with a new child! he’s a mess, but aren’t they all ?? like this or whatevaaaa and i’ll come to u for PLOTS !

BACKGROUND.

casey boiiii was born in london to a couple’a rich folk. dad, sean, is the ceo of a massive pharmaceutical company, and mom, emma, is from old money but spends most of her time bein’ a lil socialite and doing heavy charity work. they were good for a long long time. like casey grew up wanting for nothing, attending elite private schools and just all around living The Dream™

his dad is stern and driven by logic and money. if it were up to him, he woulda been working 24/7 and leaving his son in the hands of a nanny until he was old enough to inherit the company lmao. his mama is the one who really ... held the family together. she stayed home with case, she made sure sean regularly spent time with the family. queen of holidays and sunday dinners. casey was absolutely a mama’s boy

all was well! until casey turned 12 and his mom fell terminally ill. she passed away within like six months of her diagnosis and yessir this is.. when shit hit the fan. sean became absolutely miserable and threw himself into work, thus throwing casey into the hands of house staff. he was rarely ever home and really... kind of just stopped dad duties and wallowed in his own grief.

casey tried desperately to get his dad’s attention back. he was making stellar grades, perfect grades even. he was in sports year around, and he was fucking good at them esp lacrosse. he ... fuckin learned to cook in hopes of taking after his mom and being able to keep sunday dinners going. he joined student council and even faked an interest in business. lil dude grew the fuck up at such a young age. and it! didn’t! work!

when he ... got into high school ... he got frustrated with his situation and started leaning into his unresolved anger because let me tell you he was ... pissed. about all of it. this is when he fell into the wrong crowd. he made friends who were rowdy and rude and violent, and he found that the most fervent things he felt was when he was doing something wrong. he ,.... dabbled in vandalism but also really started to get in trouble for fighting akdjfh

and it worked. his dad was halfway paying attention, being called into school after school as casey was suspended and occasionally even expelled for.. fighting. .. he was woken up in the middle of the night when casey was escorted home for being too drunk at a party or for getting caught street racing. every time they saw each other, his dad was screaming at him, but at least he was seeing him ya know??

casey really got into a lot of trouble when he got his license and began street racing. the adrenaline from racing kinda.... solved all of his problems?? like it dulled the anger and numbed the pain while also ... bringing him all the excitement and joy ya know. 

when he was sixteen he uhhh got kicked outta the last private school in london that would take him for shitty attendance and fighting. the same week, he completely totaled his car, damn near killing himself in the process, by racing in a new housing development and uhhhh literally taking out an unfinished house (it’s ok all that was standing was like the wooden support beams aight) BUT it was either... spendin time in a juvenile detention center...... or being shipped off to stay with someone else and hopefully start over

so that’s what happened! good old sean o’neill said “nope” and sent his son to live with his brother in a tiny town in a tiny state in america. that’s right bois... when he was seventeen, case moved from london to provincetown. casey kinda saw this as... his dad giving up on him and got... angrier. but it’s better than prison so!

he was kind of... a brat when he got to provincetown. didn’t want to be there. didn’t want to be anywhere really. just broody and mad all the time. participated in sports solely to get some of the angry energy out but didn’t do much else. he’s really only a part of snackpack because his cousin (hiiiii bronny) is.... and he loves her tons so he was obligated to at least be civil to her friends

he ,... got his grades on track, for the most part... and stopped fighting, for the most part. but this dumb bitch can’t stop doing reckless shit. like i’m surprised he still has a license bc the number of speeding tickets is borderline not livable.

he never really felt like he... fit... in provincetown. he still doesn’t really know where he fits in the grand scheme of life. his grades and his dad’s bank account were the only reason he got into a decent college. he went for business, bc that’s all his dad would pay for, and his heart just wasn’t fuckin’ in it at all. he graduated in may but has no fuckin idea what he wants to do. at this rate though, if he keeps fucking around, he’s going to end up being :) a nothing :) just like good old dad expects :)

PERSONALITY.

very dude bro. like you look at him and you’re like ‘idk if i wanna fuck with that’ bc he is large and stupid confident ... sometimes arrogant. definitely one of those cocky smirk lookin, backwards hat wearin, lemme take u out types of assholes idk like he’s not broody ya know. 

he doesn’t really initiate conversation. like he’s not one for small talk, kinda thinks its a lil bit of a waste of time. he’s not unapproachable.. he just values good, interesting conversation

think ... jess mariano from gilmore girls, ronan lynch from trc, and a lil sprinkle of brian o’conner from fast and furious kAJSDAHFA

his moral compass is outta whack ok! like life is not black and white in his mind. everything is grey

very clever boy. consciously makes bad decisions, but he’s clever as fuck. quick witted. he doesn’t look it but... ya boy is smart. just doesn’t fuckin’ apply himself

charming! but like ... into the woods charming, not cinderella charming. charming with an ulterior motive. charming to get what he wants. very rarely charming just for the hell of makin someone feel nice. selfish lil shit

fearless as hell, always down for adventure and a good time

a lot nicer to his close friends than he is to everyone else like akdfhas sorry @ everyone who isn’t in the snack pack ur automatically a lil bit worse in his mind

a massive flaw of his is that he truly doesn’t know how to handle his own emotions,. he’s become a pro at repressing them. even when they’re good . feelings, he has a hard time showing it?? that’s why he... acts out dude. he’s pissed

would die for his lil cuzzo y’all should know this now to prepare urself

fiercely loyal to his people

still luvs to fsu when he has the chance,,... loves a good adrenaline rush

surprisingly good at cheering people up. not great at comforting them! he’s workin’ on that... but he is good turning that frown upside down!

literally just needs someone to kick his ass. 

PLOTS IDEAS.

a best friend... obvi. someone he clicked with as soon as he moved to ptown

frenemies bro... like they rag on each other all the time, they’re always competitive as hell, but in the end... they’ve got each other’s back type of frenemies

i have a plot in mind based on billie eilish’s ‘i love you’ that could be interesting aksdjfh specifically the ‘say you were tyrna make me laugh, and nothing has to change today you didn’t mean to say i love you’ line lol angsty

a mom friend! someone to kinda... keep an eye on him

partners in crime bro the kinda person that just..... when they’re together it’s next level . and borderline dangerous because they just continue to hype each other up and play off of each other

a bit of a hookup .. situation like kajsdf basically the type of shit you see in friends with benefits and no strings attached before they catch feelings. smth like a fling idk

college roommatesr

flirtationships or just generally flirty frienships those are s ofun 

exes and unrequited loves and slowburns y’all know i’m a slut for that shit 

ok that’s all!! this is so shitty lmao aksjfh ok like this and i’ll come to u for plotzzzzzz 

#snackpackintro

[elizabethrobertajones]

How after the mixtape are Dean and Cas' romantic feelings not considered canon? That shit was not subtext and even if you disregard the Mary and John Led Zepplin connection, mixtapes are almost exclusively romantic in fiction not to mention the whole returning one as a break up and framing of the scene. I just don't understand how even to the GA that was ambiguous. Honestly these moving goalposts are very confusing to me. Aside from PR not mentioning it I don't get what more the show needs (1/2)

to do, to establish that yes it’s written as romantic but that they are not in the being together stage. We don’t know what will happen in the future but to me 12x19 pretty clearly showed that at least at that point in their relationship, that’s where they were at. I wondered if you had any thoughts on it because it’s been nagging at me for a while? (2/2)

I mean, yeah, I have a LOT of thoughts about it because it was a sea change in the way Destiel presented, for me. There’s been MULTIPLE moments which took it up another notch, at pretty regularly spaced intervals through the show. I know my personal limit, when bingewatching 4-6 for the first time after an unintentional break from the show, was 6x20. Everyone who got into the ship without being prompted has a a moment along the way, whether it was considering all the ship teasing seriously, or thinking something about the narrative, or whatever, got to that moment where they actually hit the goalposts and started taking it seriously. 

I think several of the past moments that I find really important are also statements of intent - 9x18 for me was when I went from casual viewer and while I believed in Destiel I also saw it entirely as a subtextual creation that was not sort of… for serious consideration as a narrative tool/character endgame the show would ever even nod towards at the end of the day… to definitely thinking they were at the very least intentionally building their story with these blocks, and that it was worth investigating and exploring… That was Metatron asking us to consider the subtext and how it was a part of the story. That it wasn’t something that passes by like that but that there is an awareness and that it can and will give the story meaning. The episode being so full of strong Destiel subtext, it put me firmly where I am now in meta fandom with an overnight transformation >.> 

And 10x05 was the other one where there was a serious goalpost, where “Destiel” was said in text and a pseudo Destiel depiction happened on screen… To whatever degree it was jokey or wish fulfilment or could be interpreted this way and that as a statement to how Destiel stood in the text, it gave it a weight and presence it hadn’t had before. Even though fans had had a name for it all along, there’s something very important about naming the thing within the story and even having Sam sound out different versions of the name with pedantic detail. Between that and “I’ll just wait here then” it really established Destiel in the subtextual building blocks of the show in a fascinatingly meta way. 

Then for all the random canon events of maybe extreme shippiness, it was 12x19 that for me was a real SHIFT when it came to perceptions and presentation in the story, because of course even on the surface level it’s an extremely romantic trope to give a mixtape, and ignoring all the other analysis of the scene which only makes it worse, it betrays an enormous amount of emotion and care between Dean and Cas, in a way that’s coded strongly to our cultural perceptions as a romantic gesture having passed between them. Which means it’s another goal scored when it comes to… upping the ante of not-quite-canon-ness? 

I sort of feel like Cas’s death and return and all the connected stuff from the moment he’s stabbed through Dean saying “I do” and hugging him under the romeo+juliet glowing neon cross was either a further upping of the ante, or just showing us how to play in the rules which now exist post-mixtape, where this is the level of implied canon it’s at now… 

I mean I honestly keep saying and I mean it that pretty much since the mixtape or 12x23 I’ve been quite lost about how to handle Destiel in the sense that these were goalposts I didn’t even know I would expect the show to meet, or that if they did it would be the implied canon ending of the show where it gives us an equivalent gesture and leaves us to wonder what it was about. Instead it happens at this point and we’ve got over a season of Dean n Cas portrayed as exasperated husbands and all my interest and expertise in lawyering subtext to prove how gay it is has been left behind in its wake, so I’m just here to enjoy myself and see how it pans out now, because I set my own personal goalposts of what I assumed the show would do much lower than what Dabb set? Like, the reverse problem of people who keep moving them rather than examine the subtext and see what it says fairly without trying to lawyer their way out of what all these implications are instead. :P

But at least the mixtape made it very clear to me that you can now sort out the people who will NEVER accept something as good enough proof that the show even has romantic subtext for Dean n Cas and refuse to understand why people see it or ship it. To discount that entire conversation and the clearly expressed feelings of concern for each other, regardless of shipping, in order to claim that they don’t mean that much to each other and it’s ooc to suggest otherwise, means they’re doing the harder work when it comes to interpretation and THAT is a flipping of the stances from pre-mixtape where plausible deniability and doubt and stuff all mixed together to make it at least an awkward sell to people who hadn’t thought of it that way yet, and empowered people who wilfully didn’t want to see it. 

The Cas death arc just gave us more fodder for where shippers do less work than people who actively want to deny that Dean cares. 

But for general audiences, I think it’s quite easy to get stuck at the stage where I was pre-9x18 where Dean n Cas might even seem to be somewhat a ~confirmed couple~ except that people will lend it no credit to intent or their importance to each other in the emotional endgame, just for reasons of it not being done, or not thinking it’s possible, or in general not putting in the attention and time to piece together the relationship that a definitive canon statement would cause them to do a double take on. And that even if they then say they knew it all along, because many of these goalposts are unmissable in some senses, the credibility lent to the ship is fully missable without knowing to give it. Which is the whole problem, really. 

I’ve known the show long enough to feel its old school bones pretty deeply so I feel like that affects my personal perspective on… owedness of canon or where I started to take it seriously, and how much of the old gods of TV vs new gods possibility I would casually see in its genetic makeup. So 12x19 - being written by the new gods of TV - took the show a step further as Dabb seems to be the first showrunner of that generation of TV writers vs the ones who would play the subtext game forever - and that’s really unsettling to me. In the sense that there’s some sort of storytelling subversion thing going on here and my understanding is still kinda maybe rooted in an older postmodern take than what might end up being labelled something entirely new by future scholars… And a lot of that to me is in expectations and tropes no longer being what they were and I end up thinking of all the factors from the mass-saturation of media vs everything having to be new and individual to be considered worthy, to the effect of the internet, and the political climate in America, and the world the younger millennial writers grew up in (and we can see that literally warring with Buckleming’s old school writing in the show), and not just storytelling but representation of all walks of marginalised life coming into it, and it’s all a bunch of stuff that probably soon there’ll be a bunch of interesting scholarship on, but in the mean time we’re all riding the wave and in my personal experience I feel like we don’t even know what our surfboards are any more. 

I mean 12x23 seriously knocked me into orbit when it came to my understanding of the show, and I haven’t recovered yet. And since I spend a lot of time over-thinking as a matter of course, this is a tiny percentage of the ridiculous musings I have on it all and why I can’t just get mad at it for goalpost issues, and why I feel people lag behind and stuff. I feel like WE are lagging behind, even the people who claim to know everything about the show and analyse it all the time, and the best we can do is take it as it comes and see… But this is very much an utter fascination with watching Dabb era shed Carver era’s subtext cocoon and start testing its bizarre, mirrored, fractal wings.

#Asks #dabb vs cars #top 13 zepp traxx #riverboat gambling #12x19 #destiel

[geeharrisons-blog]

hey you crazy kids, it’s me, ya girl LARA. bringing in my fave gorl, the friend who wants to comfort you but has no idea what she’s doing, the girl who wanted to compliment you but accidentally insulted you and now doesn’t know how to fix it, who regularly says “ thanks, you too ” to ticket salesmen at the movie theatre tell her to “ have fun ” ... GEETA ( aka gee, greta, saint geeta... )

( NAOMI SCOTT, CISFEMALE, SHE/HER ) you’ve probably already heard of GEETA HARRISON through the LA music scene. the TWENTY-THREE year old is the BASSIST & CO-LEAD SINGER of the band SHY VIOLETS, an INDIE POP band that has FOUR members & sounds kind of like GROUPLOVE, FICKLE FRIENDS & THE KOOKS. GEE is said to be DEXTEROUS but also CONFRONTATIONAL. i wonder what bandslam makes of them ?

( tw: drunk driving, car accident, death )

— ✧ HISTORY

your first memory is her laughter. years later it still rings in your head, it resounds against the walls of your chest. it’s still in you. the sound of her voice as she cradled you, sang with your head against her chest. you still don’t understand the language, but the soft hums and vibrations tell you that you are oh, so wanted. oh, so loved.

your parents are DAVID and SAMIRA. your parents were young and in love. your parents were broke. your parents moved to SAN FRANCISCO and started a band. you weren’t planned, but who cares about plans anyway ?

you are born from their music. you sprout from the fingertips that caress the piano keys, or strum the guitar. they name you SONG, in your mother’s native tongue ( GEETA, GEE-TAH ). you were always meant to make music. to BE music.

you never knew silence. there was always MUSIC, always beautiful harmonies filling the air and flooding your lungs. the beatles, the stones, hendrix, joplin, dylan, bowie. you don’t listen to the radio. you only know your father’s records, and your mother’s voice. the strum of his guitar. her fingers on the piano keys.

you turn TEN years old and you hold a guitar for the first time. he teaches you his favorite songs, which are also yours. you don’t have a lot to talk about, but you have THIS. this is the ONE thing you can share with your father, and you take to it like a duck to water. you were B O R N from music, like athena from zeus’ head. you were ALWAYS meant for this.

school lets out, and you run to the music store. you make music for the people, take advantage of the instruments on display. you learn how to play on borrowed keys and strings. there isn’t a MOMENT when you’re not playing, or listening, or making music. at school, you write, at home, you practice. this is ALL you know.

the first time you hold a BASS guitar in your hands you’re FOURTEEN. you feel as if part of your body has been missing until this very moment. it’s a tan-colored stratocaster, and it feels like coming HOME.

the summer after you turn FIFTEEN, you’ve got your eyes set on a seafoam green fender. you work all summer. you don’t see your friends. you bring her home and name her PENNY LANE.

in high school, you join every band that will have you. you just want to play music, you don’t care about the genre. you NEED to play. at home, you write your own songs, but you keep them to yourself. one day, they’ll find the right outlet.

you’re EIGHTEEN and almost out of high school when some drunk asshole C O L L I D E S with your mom as she’s driving home one night. they rush her to the hospital. you’re hanging out with your band after a show when you get the call. your father is holding her hand as she takes her last breaths, moments before you come running in. you’re too L A T E.

you almost don’t graduate. you stop playing. you stop writing. you live with your father in complete silence. for the FIRST time, there isn’t a sound. not a note, not a hum. the next year passes by in a foggy blur. suddenly you’re NINETEEN and nothing has happened. you haven’t moved an inch.

your dad has moved on. you don’t understand how. every day he walks further, and further A W A Y from you. you hoped it would be the other way around, that this would bring you closer. isn’t grief supposed to do that for people ? instead, he finds someone else. you were so used to seeing your parents together, so used to thinking that they were the ONLY people out there for each other. it doesn’t make sense in your head for your father to be putting a RING on someone else’s finger.

now, you have a stepmother. she’s sweet, but she’s not your mom. you let her know. don’t let her fool herself into thinking she’s a replacement. you have SIBLINGS now. around your age. they’re nothing but STRANGERS to you.

one day, you sit down at the piano your mother used to play. it doesn’t sound the same as when she played it, each notes bouncing off the walls of the apartment you grew up in, but it kind of feels like she’s still THERE. your dad starts crying. there’s a moment of understanding. this is where your paths diverge. he’s MOVING with his new wife and kids. there’s a baby on the way. you realize you need to move too. this isn’t the same apartment you grew up in. you can’t STAY here.

the next day you pack your things and drive to LA. you don’t have a plan yet, but you’re not too worried. again, who cares about plans ?

a friend lends you his couch. you get a job at a music store ( those have always felt like home, no ? ). you two find your own place. you work a few different jobs, teach other kids how to play music. you find your way around the scene. make some friends who play in bands. you join a band called SHY VIOLETS. you’re back to playing the bass, and you feel like you have a home again. everything is finally making sense. THIS IS WHAT YOU WERE MEANT TO DO.

— ✧ PERSONALITY

❝ she didn’t sob or wail. her grief was horribly discreet  but as persistent and almost as silent as bleeding from an unstitched wound. ❞

ZODIAC SIGN: aries-taurus cusp ( april 20th ) PERSONALITY TYPE: estp – the entrepreneur ENNEAGRAM: type 8 – the challenger TEMPERAMENT: melancholic HOGWARTS HOUSE: gryffindor MORAL ALIGNMENT: true neutral PRIMARY VICE: pride PRIMARY VIRTUE: diligence ELEMENT: earth MORE STATS HERE !!

hello kids this is geeta aka gee, my sad, awkward, fighty gorl.

at first, she’s kinda quiet and reserved. she has a one-track mind, and the only thing she cares about is the music. she wants to be the best bassist she can be. the best singer she can be. make the band the best it can be.

she lives and breathes music. it’s what she grew up on, it’s the only thing she knows. doesn’t really understand people who aren’t as passionate about music as she is. can be a little closed-minded when it comes to this. she honestly just doesn’t do anything that isn’t music-related. definitely needs to learn how to relax and get a life outside of the band. music is her life; she doesn’t care about anything else.

she’s pretty great at what she does and she knows it, so she can get cocky sometimes. she’s very proud of the band and what they’ve achieved, and sometimes that can go to her head. but the truth is she has the chops to back up her talk.

she’s stubborn as a mule and that definitely shows when dealing with the band. she knows what she wants and has trouble compromising. shy violets is all she has so she’s fiercely protective of it, and extremely loyal to her bandmates.

she doesn’t trust people easily, so she’s very cautious when making band-related decisions. who they sign with, where they play, etc. she’s kind of a control freak.

she’s a generally friendly person, but she doesn’t open up easily and plays things close to the vest. she can come off a little cold sometimes, but not rude. just awkward. her communication skills are shit.

she’s only comfortable enough to be emotionally open with a few select people. or, of course, through the music she writes.

she can’t back down from a fight. it’s a problem, and she knows it, but she can’t avoid confrontation, she runs headfirst into it, even if she’s in the wrong. mama didn’t raise a quitter, but she did raise a fool.

she’s always listening to music. she’s that – *planet explodes* *removes one earbud* what – meme.

she doesn’t really drink, partly because she’s a control freak, and partly because she’s still spooked by what happened to her mom. she’s not very comfortable around drunk people, unless she’s also a little tipsy. she’ll drink just enough so that the people around her don’t think she’s weird, but she’s always the sober friend at the end of the night. she’s always the designated driver, even if she wasn’t out drinking that night. she’ll get out of bed to drive the drunk children home. she’ll do this without being asked, but she’ll still complain about it the whole car ride.

a bicon™ because i’m a firm believer that straight people don’t exist.

you will all learn soon enough that my specialty is sad girls™ and this is. only the first. it’ll only get sadder from here on out.

— ✧ EXTRAS

BASSIST CLAIM: laena geronimo from the like. VOICE CLAIM: greta salpeter from the hush sound. THEME SONGS: way it goes – hippo campus | some nights – fun. | don’t take the money – bleachers | drive – pale waves | some nights – fun. PINTEREST: xx PLAYLIST: [ always a wip ] xx

— ✧ CONNECTIONS

i’m probably gonna work out a page for these, but in the meantime, i’m just gonna list some general ideas in case anyone is interested !!

your character and geeta grew up around each other in san francisco, and they moved to la around the same time. they sometimes drive up there together [ taken: open 0/1 ]

your character was the first new friend gee made when she moved to los angeles. still very raw from losing her mother, she opened up to them. they know her better than most people [ taken: ricky clark ]

your character is the friend gee crashed with when she first arrived in los angeles, and later got an apartment with. they still live together, with all the ups and downs that entails [ taken: nathaniel taylor ]

your character is a big influence in geeta’s music, she probably saw them live a few years ago and is absolutely blown away by what they do musically. she admires them greatly, and really looks up to them [ open 0/1 ]

your character is geeta’s best friend. her platonic life partner. 10/10 would die for them without thinking twice. they sometimes makeout a little too [ taken: jade vandermeer ]

your character worked with geeta at the music store [ open 0/?? ]

your character and geeta dated shortly after she moved to la. it didn’t last, and they both realized they were together for all the wrong reasons. they’re friends now, but not after writing some angry breakup songs about each other [ taken: nathaniel taylor ]

your character and geeta dated for a while, but it didn’t end well. not necessarily messy, but awkward. she does everything in her power to avoid them [ open 0/1 ]

your character and geeta dated for a while, and they were really into each other, but that kind of fizzled out. they’re still friends though [ open 0/1 ]

your character and geeta hooked up once. it’s nbd [ open 0/?? ]

your character is someone geeta kind of hates. maybe she doesn’t hate them, but she’s kind of grossed out by them. the last person she would ever expect to hook up with, but hey, she did. and now they won’t let her forget it, because it’s so easy to get under her skin [ open 0/1 ]

your character and geeta aren’t in the same band, but often get together to jam out, or write music together. throughout this process, they bond and learn a lot about each other [ open 0/1 ]

your character and geeta almost dated once. almost. something happened that made them reconsider [ open 0/1 ]

your character has a crush on geeta, and she doesn’t even notice. perhaps it’s better this way, since she can’t return the feeling and wouldn’t know how to turn them down [ open 0/1 ]

your character and geeta don’t really get along. they’re always trying to one-up each other, always trying to beat the other one. they don’t hate each other, but they’re constantly competing [ open 0/1 ]

your character has geeta’s phone on speed dial for when they’re too drunk to go home. they crash regularly on her couch [ open 0/?? ]

your character is someone geeta’s had feelings for some time, but still hasn’t acknowledged. they’re good friends, so taking that next step feels impossible. they’re someone she can open up to, and her feelings are getting harder and harder to deny [ taken: ricky clark ]

#❛ ɪ ᴡɪsʜ ᴛʜᴀᴛ ᴍʏ ʟɪᴘs ᴄᴏᴜʟᴅ ʙᴜɪʟᴅ ᴀ ᴄᴀsᴛʟᴇ ❜ ( muse ) #scene:intro #drunk driving tw #car accident tw #death tw #just covering my bases here

[sonderei]

I got bored and answered one of those 100-questions things so if you ever wanted to know a stupid amount of useless information about me read on, otherwise enjoy whatever content is in the next post!

Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? Spotify

is your room messy or clean? my room is a mess, the rest of the apartment is pretty clean

what color are your eyes? brown

do you like your name? why? its grown on me. I used to get teased a lot in school “hey Ariel, where’s your best friend Flounder??” but now I work on Disney property and it’s on my name tag so I get to make a lot of kids (and adults) happy

what is your relationship status? been dating a small mess of a person for 4 years, whom I love dearly 

describe your personality in 3 words or less basically a cat

what color hair do you have? brown, or like a really dirty blonde if I spend enough time in the sun

what kind of car do you drive? color? a black 2013 hyundai accent hatchback (named Jazz)

where do you shop? where I shop: target, forever21, H&M, BoxLunch, Garage where I’d LIKE to shop: ModCloth, ASOS

how would you describe your style? I once bought an oversized Polariod windbreaker and I wear it everywhere I can??? I also love passive aggressive crop tops (”no thanks”) I wore it to a mandatory meeting at work at 9am and any time my managers asked me a question I just pointed to my shirt. So idk that should tell you something

favorite social media account I think I enjoy Instagram and Tumblr equally?

what size bed do you have? queen

any siblings? one full brother (5 years younger), one half brother on my dad’s side (13 years younger), and one half sister on my mom’s side (18 years younger). 

if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why? idk because I haven’t traveled anywhere I’d actually like to live. I love the idea of living northwest US (Seattle, Portland) or in NZ or like Scotland or somewhere with beautiful scenery but like...never been so can’t say for sure?

favorite snapchat filter? flower crown

favorite makeup brand(s) NYX is pretty much all I use but I also do like bare minimum with my makeup

how many times a week do you shower? typically every other day unless I’m super gross

favorite tv show? too hard. Steven Universe, Game of Thrones, A:TLA, and Adventure Time?

shoe size? 7-8 depending on who makes them

how tall are you? smol. Like 5′3″ or so? 

sandals or sneakers? sneakers, unless going somewhere involving water and/or sand

do you go to the gym? nah. I’m up and down stairs at least 20 times a day, usually while carrying stuff. that’s my exercise.

describe your dream date sitting in front of the Ocean Voyager exhibit at the Georgia Aquarium all day. like literally that’s it. and my date lets me without asking to move on, and ideally enjoys it as much as I do.

how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment? uhhh like $25 because that’s how much you have to have to open a new bank account which I’ve been meaning to do for like two weeks now

what color socks are you wearing? not wearing any, but I was wearing shark socks all day

how many pillows do you sleep with? just one, super soft and squishy

do you have a job? what do you do? I'm a server at a restaurant in Disney Springs at Walt Disney World. Its challenging and often frustrating and stressful but I get to meet some really cool people so it evens out. (Pat Sajak from Wheel of Fortune was in last week, I didn’t ask him if I could buy a vowel because I have some dignity)

how many friends do you have? like true friends, would drop everything for me if I asked them / needed them to? I’d say 3. But my social group is like...maybe 10 people? That I actively try to hang out with semi regularly.

whats the worst thing you have ever done? I honestly don’t even know. I forgot a woman’s ketchup last week at work and apparently I ruined her entire Disney vacation so

whats your favorite candle scent? usually anything with jasmine, so long as it isn’t overpowering

3 favorite boy names Nathaniel, Sebastian, Milo 

3 favorite girl names Riley, Maisie, Phoebe

favorite actor? robert downey jr probs

favorite actress? tessa thompson?

who is your celebrity crush? ugh. tom holland, tessa thompson, rdj? 

favorite movie? Spirited Away or Howl’s Moving Castle

do you read a lot? whats your favorite book? I used to, before I worked at a bookstore. For some reason that killed my love for reading. But favorite books were the Bartimaeus Trilogy and Abarat.

money or brains? brains

do you have a nickname? what is it? Skip (long story short, its a Cabin Pressure reference because I’ve always wanted to be a pilot)

how many times have you been to the hospital? for myself? 5? maybe 6?

top 10 favorite songs in no particular order Evolve by Phoria Put ‘Em Up by Priority Cleopatra by The Lumineers Feel It Still by Portugal. The Man Miracle by CHVRCHES Dissolve by Absofacto Taro by alt-J Lavender by Two Door Cinema Club Dinosaurs by The Maccabees Ambling Alp by Yeasayer

do you take any medications daily? nope

what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc) ehh a bit on the oily side

what is your biggest fear? losing the ones I love

how many kids do you want? NONE ZERO NADA ZIP ZILCH FUCK NO

whats your go to hair style? pull it back, messy bun if possible

what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc) a p small apartment (but not tiny, I think it’s like 800-900 sq ft)

who is your role model? Steve Irwin

what was the last compliment you received? a guest at one of my tables told me I looked like one of the recent Bond girls

what was the last text you sent? bailing on a few friends who were going to Blizzard Beach because I was exhausted from having my dad in town for the last two days so I wanted to sleep

how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real? like 2 or 3. not very old

what is your dream car? realistic? a nice Subaru or Audi. Maybe a Tesla unrealistic? bugatti veyron

opinion on smoking? cigarettes? ew gross not around me also poor life choices weed? don’t care, just not around me please and thanks my other half is allergic

do you go to college? I did, graduated two years ago, still haven’t done anything with my life / degree

what is your dream job? anything working directly with animals, especially marine mammals, big cats, or non-venomous reptiles

would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs? big city. right in the middle of it.

do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels? not usually, I have specific stuff I use for my hair that’s a lot nicer than the stuff at hotels

do you have freckles? not like a ton but yeah

do you smile for pictures? if I feel like it? also depends on who’s taking the picture

how many pictures do you have on your phone? I’d say somewhere in the realm of like 650-800?

have you ever peed in the woods? yep, used to go camping a lot as a kid

do you still watch cartoons? hell yeah, I usually prefer them to anything else. Steven Universe, Adventure Time, Voltron, A:TLA, Foster’s Home for Imaginary Friends...that shit is my jam

do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds? mmmm Wendys but I usually don’t get c nugs from anywhere

Favorite dipping sauce? chick fil a sauce or ranch

what do you wear to bed? just underwear

have you ever won a spelling bee? no but I came close in middle school

what are your hobbies? not many tbh. I have a few reptiles that I take care of. I collect / trade Disney pins. I love swimming but don’t do it all that often. Uhhh...seeing how many times I can ride Kilamonjaro Safari in a row before the cast members begin to judge me?

can you draw? not really, no

do you play an instrument? nope, I can’t even read music and I can barely hum

what was the last concert you saw? uhhhh...I think Death Cab for Cutie and CHVRCHES?

tea or coffee? tea

Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts? Starbucks for drinks, Dunkin for food (donutssssss)

do you want to get married? yeah, eventually. I told the SO that ideally before I’m 30 and that we’re not having a wedding but we’re gonna elope instead because fuck weddings I don’t have the money for that or the patience to plan it

what is your crush’s first and last initial? not really a crush but more of a “current-and-potentially-forever life partner” but DU

are you going to change your last name when you get married? no idea. D wants to change their last name but idk if they’d take mine or they’d just change it to their middle name and then I’d take that? honestly it doesn’t really matter to me each way so long as I don’t get their current last name (because of bad associations)

what color looks best on you? no idea honestly. I prefer dark, muted blues?

do you miss anyone right now? my parents and siblings, and two of my best friends

do you sleep with your door open or closed? open, otherwise the cats would never let us sleep

do you believe in ghosts? nah, not really. I grew up in a town that had a bunch of history and by extension ghost stories, so it was more a part of “tourist culture” than something that seemed legitimate to me

what is your biggest pet peeve? I never know until someone starts doing it around me. but uhhhh I hate loud chewers, people that refuse to even try to see your side of an argument, and when you’re sitting somewhere in public like on a bench or something and there’s plenty of other empty seating options nearby and yet someone comes up and sits RIGHT NEXT TO YOU nope you know what that’s it I fucking hate that and it happens to me all the time at Disney

last person you called` I think my mom?

favorite ice cream flavor? cookies and cream, unless I’m at one of those places where you can basically make your own flavor in which case I will ALWAYS do a rose-infused ice cream with pistachios 

regular oreos or golden oreos? please don’t make me choose

chocolate or rainbow sprinkles? rainbow!

what shirt are you wearing? not wearing one ;)

what is your phone background? just a basic stock photo of some ferns. kinda boring but I like simple backgrounds

are you outgoing or shy? its pretty even but if I had to say one over the other I’m probably slightly more outgoing than I am shy.

do you like it when people play with your hair? only people I know and allow. don’t just come up and start playing with my hair unless you KNOW that I’d be okay with it

do you like your neighbors? haven’t met them! we moved in like a month ago but we still haven’t seen anyone that lives on our floor

do you wash your face? at night? in the morning? if I remember, but honestly I’m really bad about doing it unless I’m in the shower in which case it’s every time I take a shower

have you ever been high? nope

have you ever been drunk? sadly no. I have a ridiculously high natural alcohol tolerance, so I get sick to my stomach before I can even manage tipsy.

last thing you ate? pizzaaaaaaa

favorite lyrics right now idek and that’s a lot of effort so sorry here’s me “free pass” I’m using it on this question next

summer or winter? ugh winter always I can’t stand the heat there’s only so many layers you can take off

day or night? night

dark, milk, or white chocolate? milk or white. milk for straight eating, white for flavoring other things

favorite month? october

what is your zodiac sign leo!

who was the last person you cried in front of? my significant other

#I was bored #fite me #in case anyone ever wanted to know what I do for a living #or what my favorite songs are #or what color my eyes are #now you know

[purplenickel]

So this turned more into my queer dating history but its fun lol

So I have always been attracted to boys even before I knew that trans was a thing much less that I could transition. I also always admired girls and found ways to rationalize it until like middle school when I became aware of bisexuality where I had so many crushes usually on the mean kids at least the ones that didn’t have like weird shaped heads or watch alarms that went off at weird times during class like why do you need an alarm for 1:27? Youre supposed to be learning basic Spanish do that instead lol An I dated one guy in middle school when I knew I was bisexual and at least a tom boy. And the things I wanted to do to that boy. Like I was kinky as a small child lol like damn you could do a lot more than hold my hand and let me give you innocent little cheek kisses.

We stayed together until freshmen year of high school where I was bored with how slow things were going so I broke up with him. It probably didn’t help that I was starting to question my gender then either.  I told my mom I thought I wanted to be a boy and she shot that down real quick “You’re a girl and cant be a boy” so I ended up trying to cut off all my hair until it was so fucked she had to give me a buzzcut and I ended up looking like a hard core butch lesbian for a semester)

Second boyfriend was this skinny dude like only an inch taller than me and I was 5’3 at the time. I wrote down love song lyrics and gave them to him to ask him out. Im romantic like that lol. We dated for a while and I guess we just grew apart. He wouldn’t do much more than kiss me occasionally and I was like damn yall how do I keep getting these innocent Victorian straight boys. But he was cute and I still see him around town much to my embarrassment. Idk why im embarrassed so much maybe I feel bad that he thought he was dating a girl and im not?

Next boyfriend was a bi emo guy named Justice. I dated him mainly because he was the only bi guy I knew at my school in rural redneck Virginia lol he ended up being really kinky and kinda weirdly intense.  Like the fun part was he didn’t mind that I was all for sitting in the back of the anime club/computer classroom and tryina get down. The weird part was that he had the idea to write Real Person fanfiction staring ourselves as like vampires because he had a major biting kink and was really emo and thought he was goth but rural VA is a hard place to be goth when all your clothes come from walmart. But he was really intense like he had our entire lives planned out in the fanfic and actually went a bought me a ring  , gold with a pearl setting, that I immediately lost because why would you give me a ring??? Nah so I got real disinterested in Justice and planned to break up with him. I actually ended up cheating on him sort of. My class went on a field trip to Jamestown famous school tour site all Virginian probably had to go to. And one of my classmates/kind of friends was this really hot guy with this shaggy blonde hair and this wiry lanky body and was this laid back hot stoner type and I really liked him so I sat next to him on the bus ride and seduced him through out the whole trip until we stopped in this little shopping mall on the way back to school. I was walking around one of the department stores and saw him trying one underwear of all things lol he invited me to help him pick out a new pair of tight good looking underwear and I agreed and slipped into the changing room while he was putting them on and ended up giving him a hand job he was grateful lol. Then we went back to the bus and pretended like nothing happened but there was already a rumor going around the buses that somebody had sex in the store. A few days later Justice actually broke up with me because he felt that I was “acting different” and I probably was simply because I wasn’t attracted to him any more.

Between dating Justice and the next guy I did have my first kiss with a girl! She was so pretty with silky black hair in a bob and dark blue eyes and the palest skin. She dressed in rave clothes all the time and sometimes wore fairy wings and cloaks to school. She was delightfully strange but moved to florida I think but we were saying goodbye by the schools front doors and when it was my turn I gave her a tight hug and she turned her face and gave me a kiss and I was just wow kissing girls is so nice. Speaking of girls, I also had a huge crush on president of the anime club. She was so tall and really thin with a few curves, but she was really confident and funny and just made you feel at ease and I could’ve seen myself dating her easily but she was dating someone else but im pretty sure she might have been bi but she graduated and moved to Washington state to be a masseuse.

Next boyfriend was extremely religious and also wanted to get married. I was against getting married so young, really against converting to southern baptism and definitely against having kids. Pregnancy has always freaked me out mostly because I don’t like pain and don’t want to be in pain and in general everything about reproduction freaks me out idk why. But I really wanted him. He had these nice big and rough hands and was so warm all the time. He was also really sweet. But I broke up with him because I couldn’t do the religious thing It was Too Much™.

After dating him though I had this huge crush on this girl a year younger than me in me creative writing class. She was gothic in a very flowery dark fairy type way and I loved it she was also had a huge gay crush on my female friend who I can confirm is very beautiful with long dyed red hair and olive skin and this soft husky voice that would be perfect for a late night radio talk show where you call in about relationship problems. But anyways the girl I had a crush on was named Sage and she was beautiful  with her long blonde hair and her light green eyes and small everything she was very thin like scarily thin she actually had an eating disorder that we tried to help her with and she could reach her hand behind her ribs and grip the bottom of her ribs it was creepy to look at. She wrote beautiful and dark poems and never seemed to mind that my crush took the form of hugging her and resting against her as often as I could. She never seemed interested in me though I think she was actually fatphobic or maybe she was just femme for femme I dunno but I graduated and nev er saw her again so whatever.

After I graduated high school I decided to go to a traditionally womens college. My roommate was ace and like the first openly ace person I had ever met and she was really cool and introduced me to the idea of being ace but at the time I was decidedly bi and later pan once some more friends introduced me to tumblr and I started openly learning about gender and sexuality. All my friends were really hot that I met at college and I probably would have been down to date any of them except for the girl that I met through the anime club who also really liked the anime Hetalia. We could get together and watch episodes and read a variety of fanfictions ranging from family type things to kinky sex shit we were very close and im sure that a lot of people thought we were dating or at least fooling around together. We actually met each other at a Virginia anime convention where the anime club people went in a group and I went separately with some friends from high school (the best part of the experience was the wafflehouse in the hotel parking lot) but me and my friend got together at the con and went back to my groups hotel room to gush over the merch we had found and watch some anime together. I was in a closet cosplay that consisted of booty shorts and tied button up shirt so I had a lot of skin showing and we were sitting on the bed by ourselves until my friends came back and they all thought we had sex like no she was very attractive and had really nice curves but girl needed to shower more often because unfortunately she had a smell to her that I just didn’t like. I think she was interested in dating me but she ended up having financial problems of some sort and couldn’t come back to school the next year.

After she left school I came out as trans and got closer to the core group of the college anime club. They were all really hot except for the vegetarian one but she had a boyfriend and didn’t seem to like me much anyways so whatever. I also dated this one girl in my graduation class for like three days over the summer but she broke up with me because she was again a southern Baptist and couldn’t honestly date a trans person because it somehow went against god or some shit. That person has since come out as trans masculine. But anyways next person I dated was this smoking hot older girl who only wore skirts. She was southern Baptist and straight but I had to try even if I never got to be anything other than her creepy friend who everybody knew had a crush on her. She surprisingly was interested in dating me so we started going out. We went on dates around town to explore and see new stores and went to the park and shit was great we had kisses and cuddles and fun cute dates and sexy times but we also clashed a lot over mostly miscommunication. It didn’t help that I was on a medicine that once I started taking it regularly like I was supposed to my sex drive dropped to nonexistent. We fought over this a few times but still planned to try to get an apartment off campus the next year. I thought she was being too clingy by texting me pretty often that summer. I was in a bad mood all of that summer though. We broke up and got back together over the phone probably at least three times before deciding to break up for good. Sometimes I wonder what would have happened if we had stayed together because when we weren’t fighting we had a lot of fun and I told her things I hadn’t told anybody before, I felt safe.

The next person I dated didn’t go so well. This was a friend from the colleges LARP club that also had people from the community or it was a community club that extended to the college kids and just ended up being held on campus but that’s how we met. She had a very butch androgynous look but I just really liked her personality no matter how hot she looked in her leather jacket. So we started off as LARP friends and then I worked up the nerve to ask for her number and just texted her about random things and we ended up talking about how much we both like coffee so that turned into a coffee date at the local dunkin and it was a lot of fun and we had a few more dates like that and things were looking good. A few friends that knew both of us warned me that she didn’t normally go for men but I had talked to her myself and was like that a lie and you don’t know what youre talking about ok so we hung out for a few months going slow and not really relationship dating. Around the time I was thinking of asking her to be a couple my mental health deteriorated and I ended up being hospitalized. I tried calling her once to keep up the habit of talking at night through text since I couldn’t text at the time but I think me being in the “cr*zy ward” freaked her out because 1) the phone call did not go well and was never tried again and 2) once I got out of the hospital I texted her to see if she was interested in picking up where we left off and she shut me down saying she just wanted to be friends. Of course not even a month later I found out that she and the girl I had dated for over a year were now dating. This bothered me for a long time and I was constantly wondering if I was too cr*zy to date somebody or it was because I was trans a whole bunch of self hatred type thoughts. I eventually got over it (mostly)

Then I didn’t date anybody until last year. I started texting my friend Cat from high school (back then we had a very cute James Potter Severus Snape thing going on where the characters were dating but we weren’t) and I learned that they were agender and ace and I thought it over and determined that I was ridiculously attracted to them and didn’t mind being in a nonsexual relationship because at the time I was still pretty sex repulsed myself besides for reading kinky fanfiction and getting myself off every once in a while. So We went on a friends date in the spring to see Zootopia and it was so much fun and they were so cute in their leggings and hoodie with their windblown cropped hair dyed dark red. I asked them if they wanted to date and they said yes so we went on our first official date (a hike up an abandoned walking trail where we both got covered in ticks and I had to stop and stretch out a bad leg cramp, then we got lunch at a cute vegetarian café in town and went to the town park to hang out. We sat in the grass and listened to Florence and the Machine songs and smiled at each other looking cute. We then got milkshakes and learned that we still had ticks on us from the hick and they took me home and gave me a sweet kiss goodbye with the promise of more dates in the future). Over the summer we hung out a lot because they and their mom were moving from the house they had lived in for years to a house a county over and I volunteered to help with the moving of the last few belongings. Maybe 5 trips all together, but it was a good time every day we got to see each other. We would comfortable hang out in their old house packing things up and taking our time and then we would take the forty five minute drive to the new house listening to whatever queer music we could find and save to playlists.  Then we would cuddle on their couch after taking the days moving things inside and find something nice to eat on the way back to my house. I visited their college a few times (another traditionally women’s college) and met their friends who were also agender and queer and very cute people indeed. I enjoyed all the time I spent with Cat. Cat also helped me realize I was leaning more towards being a demiguy than strictly binary trans and that it was okay if I was ace, that sexuality can be fluid. Our relationship was very intimate and domestic and I loved it, especially the tight hugs and long slow kisses I would get each time we met and each time we had to say goodbye. I fell in love with Cat and because we didn’t see each other all the time and there was no pressure to maintain a sexual relationship I felt I could maintain those feelings I had for cat for a long time. We dated up until August of 2017 when they texted me and let me know they felt they were not only agender and asexual but also felt aromantic and would prefer to be platonic as they couldn’t keep up with the demands of a relationship. This devastated me. I took a week off from school to lie at home and let myself deal with the depression this brought. Im over Cat now. I enjoyed what we had but Im happy being friends though our ideas of friendship are different but that’s another textpost entirely.

I recently went to Charlottesville Pride 2017 with my friends that are the couple where I dated both and now they are happily dating each other and one of their other trans friends and it was so much fun. I think the act of getting a bag of free condoms reawakened my sex drive somehow?? Because now I would totally be down to get sex from anybody I was attracted to?? And im attracted to a lot more people than I usually am?? Like it was my friend Ness’s birthday a few weeks ago and she invited the same trans friend that went to pride with us to come and she brought her cousin with her and damn. Her cousin was the cutest and got so drunk like baby no you gotta stop while its still fun. So he’s agender and gave me his Snapchat and Im just…crushing so hard…hes too cute. But also I’ve been talking to people on OKCupid and everyones just so attractive (not the cismen tho neither the hets or gays wanna hit it so fuck em I don’t need that kind of negativity in my life) and all these tumblr people are cute and I wanna date everybody but everybody live like at least three hours away and it makes me sad because nobody seems to wanna try a long distance type thing which I would be up for.

So tl;dr:  if youre reading this and you think im cute, message me and ill tell you what all we could do together  ;)

Im a biromantic greyace chubby transmasculine enby and i like all body types and most personality types lol

#long post #personal #me #queer #queer dating #dating history #mlm #bisexuality #birom ace #greyace #grey ace #who want to date me #dating #girls are so pretty #i love girls #i love boys #diamoric #achillian #achillean #sapphic #only because theres no greek style word for i like girls but im not a girl #lgbt #lgbtq+ #nonbinary #nblm #nblw #nblnb #transmasculine

[dontcallmecarrie]

Live Through The Rain

On a bit of a WtNV kick lately, despite not being completely caught up yet. Add in dubious amounts of sleep and caffeine, a bout of Maria Stark feels, plus my knee-jerk reaction to stress, and I think you guys can tell where I’m going with this. 

Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe [films], Welcome To Night Vale [podcast]

Warnings: for everything Night Vale related [Librarian-caliber gore, cosmic horror, dystopian themes, etc.] plus unreliable narrator [because of different priorities, skewed ideas as to what’s normal, etc] and large amounts of crack because reasons. Under the cut, also because reasons.

Here’s a fic idea/minific-I-might-expand-later-on from some premises I kinda want to play with, with bonus Maria Stark backstory because turns out she’s a pretty major influence and butterfly effect ftw:

In which Maria Stark’s hometown was Night Vale.

Maria Carbonell grew up in a small, quaint town with good schools, [literally] breathtaking infrastructure, and left a legacy that had everyone warily looking over their shoulders and in the rafters before speaking her name. 

She may or may not have been part of the reason the town referred to an incident only as the Time of Knives, featuring a teenage Maria and a truly terrifying number of Librarians, and had been taking classes at the community college and interning at the local radio station when an errand to investigate the appearance of mysterious portals ended up leaving her stranded in New York. 

She didn’t have much to go back to; her father had entered the Blood-Space War when she wasn’t quite eight, and his letters always reached her regardless of where she was. Her mother was bitten by an antique years ago, and she’d been an only child. Besides, she could hear the radio just fine, so the homesickness wasn’t that bad.

So Maria Carbonell did what any Night Vale citizen did: she rolled with it, and settled into this new world with what she had in her pockets, and little else. Turns out, it was just enough, especially paired with her skills from when she’d earned her Undercover Operations badge, back when she’d been in Girl Scouts. 

Time passed, and she fell in love with Howard Stark, and you guys know the rest of the story.

He thinks she’s got some odd quirks, but didn’t everyone?

And Howard…changes, over the years. Hardens, becomes colder. Becomes more secretive. In another life, Maria might’ve been dismayed, by that. 

But in this one, she’s reminded of home more than ever before, because…really. Besides,it’s not like she doesn’t have her own secrets, like the bloodstones she’s carried in her pocket since leaving Night Vale, and she’s so proud of his progress in making a Vague Yet Menacing Government Agency. [Really, his attempts at secrecy are adorable.]

He’s gone for more and more time, searching for Captain America, and Maria’s left holding down the fort, smiling prettily for the cameras and unnerving literally everyone else, because the spies who work with Howard are seeing her skills with counterintelligence and information-gathering and debating about whether she’s a deep-cover agent or something else. [Howard, for his part, gets very offended by any implications of his wife being a spy, plus he researched her background himself, thus their reluctance to say anything otherwise.] Plus her skill with anything with blades? Ditto. Jarvis is slightly wary at first, but they become friends soon enough, bonding over watching Howard’s back and sharing recipes [even if Jarvis had to modify some, because apparently people around here didn’t like adding crushed pumice to brownies. Weird].

Just…Maria Stark’s content to be in the background, but is kicking ass and taking names because she was born and raised in a small town that regularly deals with eldritch abominations and temporal disparities and it’s hard not to be a badass after having earned merit badges in Concealed Weaponry and Advanced Knife Fighting Techniques before puberty. 

She loves quietly but fiercely, and takes on the world with a bright [vicious] smile and a knife tucked out of sight. [Turns out it’s genetic.]

I could go on, but this got off-track as is, so…

Tony’s birth signifies a change. 

[Of course it does.]

Suddenly, the differences between Night Vale and the rest of the world are so, very vivid. 

 For instance, her pregnancy had been very interesting. 

She was just happy Tony had ten fingers and toes, really. And didn’t mind that he’d taken after his father in looks, because her side of the family had tentacles in their family history, and while Maria didn’t see what all the fuss was about, these people were surprisingly squeamish about extra appendages. [Weird.]

Time passes, and Howard’s still out and the mansion’s mostly vacant, excluding Jarvis, so nobody should be surprised at just how large a role she played in raising him, really. 

In canon, Tony was always closer to his mother than his father, but here? Well…he’s got Night Vale in his blood. 

Here, Tony’s childhood is unusual, and it’s not even because of the genius thing. 

His bedtime stories are of flying police cars and Hooded Figures and Radon Canyon. Howard’s not home very often, but his grandfather’s letters arrive like clockwork, so there’s that. [It was only when Tony got older that he realized the irony of it, really.] The Sumerian lessons, and the self-defense against Librarians, and the best way to handle assault rifles, were all part of his fondest childhood memories. Even if they had to be kept secret, because he noticed how some people looked at his mother, like she was an alien in human skin. [Or a Librarian, or…]

Time passes, he gets older, and Jarvis is despairing in the back because Tony inherited his mother’s taste, and explaining just why there was motor oil in the cereal bowl had been a trip and a half.

Tony’s growing up, and while he’s blowing through classes, and being a prodigy just like in canon, here, when he’s at home he’s learning how to make hot chocolate just the way his mother makes it, with a dash of chili powder and just a hint of antifreeze. The stories now include the Void and Street Cleaning Day and monsters great and terrible [Librarians, what can you do? Plus the Woman From Italy] and whenever the signal’s good, they hear the broadcasts together.

[Part of Tony knows it should be impossible, but then, so’s the bloodstone circle chants, and the small bits of dark magic his mother knew and taught him because she’d earned a merit badge for Combat Incantations. He’s not good at it, but it’s enough for a pinch, so whatever.]

Sometimes, he wants to visit, but life in the spotlight, plus it being practically impossible to find sometimes, meant it’d be something for the bucket list instead. 

Time passes, and he gets older. 

He’s learned from his mother how to smile for the cameras, and he’s not even a year into MIT but he’s already sick of hearing everyone comparing him to Howard because sure, they had a family picture every so often, but really the last time he saw his father had before the man had left for yet another expedition, nearly five months ago. 

Maria’s still done her best to bridge the gap, but here there’s also the Family Secret to contend with; Tony’s got Night Vale in the blood, after all. That’s not a small thing. 

The car crash still happens, and Maria still dies. 

Except here, Tony chalks it up to time-traveling assassins from the Society For A Blood-Space War, because he’s heard of them before and it would’ve taken a lot more than a mere car crash to end Maria Stark neé Carbonell. 

The Winter Soldier, meanwhile, had to fight for his life and only narrowly made it out because the target’s wife put up unexpected resistance. The scene had to be set on fire to get rid of all the biological evidence, and HYDRA had to do some emergency surgery even though nobody’s quite sure as to where the machete wounds, or third-degree burns, even came from.

Maria had taught Tony how to handle assassins from an early age. She thought it’d be his grandfather, or his father, that’d be the reason for trouble, but just in case…

Tony’s grieving, of course, but he’s a bit more at peace than in canon. [It helps that he recognized the lingering scent of dark magic, and knew she’d fought back, when he goes to the scene.] But he’s got Night Vale in the blood; death and fire are like a second skin, to him. 

Time passes, and canon ensues, for the most part. 

He still becomes the Merchant of Death, still sells weapons that devastate landscapes and smiles for the camera. [It’s Tony Stark, of course.]

The changes are more minute than not, here; they’re in how Jarvis lived a few months longer than what the doctors had expected, after having been diagnosed with cancer [bloodstone chants for the win], they’re in how Tony actually likes DUM-E’s smoothies, because the tang of motor oil’s a very good counterpoint to the mellow notes in the alfalfa, they’re in how he sometimes turns off the music and puts on the radio, when it’s late at night and he’s alone in the workshop. [Rhodey, Happy, and Pepper get clued into his unique background, of course, and roll with it..]

Canon ensues, and shit goes down.

He’s still captured on a bright day, not a cloud in the sky and the sun scorching down on him.

The change here is, Yinsen’s feeling tendrils of darkness where there’s supposed to be a heart. The difference here is, Tony first wakes in the middle of his impromptu surgery to a doctor who’s looking at him with horrified awe, and the arc reactor goes in anyway because turns out that physiological quirks aside, his heart still doesn’t like getting shredded, protection around it or no. 

Tony left his bloodstones back home, and he was never quite as good at magic, so he goes with what he knows, to break out. Except here, he also has the shadows to help him, and their captors become increasingly drawn and tired as the days pass by. Yinsen doesn’t breathe a word, but watches with fascination as this all goes down.

They break out, of course. 

Not sure if Yinsen makes it, in this one. Hmm…details, details.

Tony crash-lands, and it might’ve killed a normal human, but…well. He’s not normal, now, is he? 

Canon ensues, with a few tweaks. 

When he meets Nick Fury for the first time, Tony doesn’t get why the man twitches like that when he offers him a drink. [Fury’d seen Maria cheerfully add Tabasco sauce to her tea, like hell he was going to drink anything her spawn offered him!] And that talk of a bigger universe? Adorable. Why’d he’d booked it shortly afterwards, he did not get, either. 

The palladium tastes like grape-flavored cough syrup, so of course it had to go. [The headaches he got from it were secondary, really.] Natasha gets hired, because he recognizes the gleam in her eyes. He hasn’t seen it outside of the mirror for decades now, like hell he wasn’t hiring her. [It’s months later that he finds out she’d been born five minutes away from Nulogorsk. Nice.]

The Avengers assemble, of course. 

Except here, there’s a lot more weirdness to contend with; Steve is so, very not prepared for the chaos that is Tony Stark. [Nobody is, really.]

The fight with the Chitauri’s the first time people start to twig that he’s Not Normal, though. Kinda hard not to, when he’s so very nonchalant about fighting alien armies [his laser knife fighting skills were very rusty, but decent enough in a pinch]. When he diverts the warhead from its intended target, he remembers all the warnings about the Void, but curiosity killed the cat so he glimpsed it anyway. 

Wasn’t much of a Void, really; the aliens are mildly alarming, to be sure, but this still isn’t the cosmic horror of the Things That Should Remain Unseen that he’d been expecting. [Overall, 4/10, for being a disappointment.]

[Loki, though, he saw the Void, Tony knew. It was obvious, from the look in his eyes even if the others didn’t quite recognize it.]

Time passes, and he carries on. 

Thanos is a threat, to be sure, but Tony’s already been quietly preparing for the Blood-Space War, so it’s a minor issue. Even if the others don’t quite agree. 

Tony talks in Russian with Natasha, sometimes, and alarms the team as his more private quirks start to show the longer he sticks around. Steve’s horror at his not blinking at the soap in his smoothies is pretty entertaining, to be sure. The less said about Clint’s finding his homemade chocolate stash, the better, and Tony only knew a few phrases in Triple Spanish but it was still enough to get the room’s attention. 

Wanda tries to get the drop on him, but turns out his worst nightmare’s a scorching sun with a Smiling God in a desert so it’s pretty much impossible to manipulate that into anything she can work with. That Tony threw a fireball right back at her didn’t exactly help, either. 

Ultron still happens, except here, JARVIS has some…quirks, because Computer and Fire Science is a department in Night Vale Community College and that implies a closer relationship between the two than one would expect. [Ultron doesn’t happen, is what I’m saying.] 

Civil War, if it were to happen, would be…fun. I mean, it probably wouldn’t even happen, because no Sokovia, and without the time crunch Tony’s able to hit everyone upside the head with the paperwork and broker something that’s approaching functional. 

Thanos…well. If Infinity Wars were to happen, Tony would go ‘screw it, time for the big guns. JARVIS, help me find Night Vale, time for that vacation’, and…well. Thanos is formidable, sure, but Tony can get his hands on Librarians and he’s the son of Maria Stark neé Carbonell, so really, who’s the scariest here?

Not mentioned: HYDRA’s got some ties with Desert Bluffs, Phil Coulson’s from Red Mesa [thus the nonchalance at all this shit going down], if I wanted even more crack I could easily try shipping Thanos with the Woman From Italy, and I could probably—uh-oh.

…this is going to be its own AU, isn’t it. Dammit, brain!

I mean, this is pretty rough considering it’s off the top of my head, but…oh no. Brain, don’t do it.

#fic idea #fic ideas #crossover #brain don't do it #gdi brain #my brain did a thing #welcome to night vale #marvel #naught rambles

[werenzki]

Andre Burakovsky #2

Anonymous said: would you write a friends w benefits imagine with andre? idk exactly what plot or whatever, but im a sucker for friends w benefits stuff and your andre writing is adorable!!

A/N: so this is probably one of my favourites, i hope you all like it as much as i do :)))

Word Count: 1,879

This wasn't exactly how you imagined life to be. Casually screwing a player of the Washington Capitals wasn't your game play, that was for sure. Yet after meeting him through Gina, the wife of another Washington Capital, you found yourself engulfed by the fun of it all. Friends by day, sharing beds by night.

"Jeez Gina," you chuckled as she filled your glass, "if I have any more wine I'll be jumping into that pool fully clothed with Bulldog right behind me," 

"Again?" John shook his head while taking a sip of his beer. 

"Hey! Your son freaking loved it," you pointed your finger at him before switching the target to the grinning young man beside him. "But we can all blame Andre for giving me the idea," you said, grinning back at him. 

"Well I blame both of you for giving Lucca the idea that he can do that regularly now," Gina narrowed her eyes at you both. 

Andre and you turned your grins into smirks. You shrugged your shoulders and sipped your wine. "Kids will be kids," you said. 

"Oh trust me," John said, "we know," 

It didn't take an idiot to know he was obviously referring to you and Andre. He and Gina were only five years older than the two of you, yet John liked to think of it as ten years instead most days. It wasn't your fault he lost his fun side after getting married and having a kid. You and Andre still liked to see the fun in everything, hence why you two clicked pretty instantly, and became such good friends. 

Only a week after the two of you meeting and Gina was trying to plan your wedding. But you made it pretty clear you weren't looking for any sort of relationship at this point in your life. Simply because your life consisted of work, work and more work. Owning a business in the city wasn't easy, especially one that was known for the Obama's loving your pastries and the Washington Capitals praising your cookies. So Andre stayed in the friend zone, but after only a month he was toeing at the lines and making your headboard shake.

Friends with benefits was the deal. When it got brought up you felt like you were back in high school again. But it just felt right between the two of you. Cause hell, if you weren't so busy with your own crazy life, you'd probably be into Andre as more than a friend. But instead you decided to keep him just that, and get a good lay out of the situation too. 

"I should get this kid to bed," Gina said while ruffling Lucca's head of curls. The toddler pouted, the tired look was clear as day on his face now. 

"I'll help," you offered while standing from where you sat on the comfy grey chair. It was sort of 'your spot' at the Carlson's house and everyone knew it too. It's where you sat and drank wine during the evening and where you read stories with Lucca during the day. 

"Aunty," Lucca said while reaching up for you. 

"Lucca," you copied his baby voice while picking him up. His head immediately rested on your shoulder while Gina walked into the kitchen and you made your way around the living room to let Lucca say his goodnights to everyone else. 

Tom tried to rile him up again but you quickly gave him a glare and whacked his arm, which made the other two boys in the room chuckle. Andre simply kissed the crown of Lucca's head and said goodnight in Swedish, it was a word you became familiar with over the months of knowing him and sharing a bed some nights. John said goodnight to his son and then you met Gina at the bottom of the stairs and you two walked up together to put him to bed. 

It only took one story and a bit of whining and crying before he was sipping his milk and watching the two of you leave with wet cheeks. Lucca's night routine was one you have known since he was just an infant. Being his godmother and all, you kinda had to get a handle of those sorts of things. 

Once you walked down the stairs with Gina behind you, you saw your seat was occupied. Andre tried his sweet smile, but it failed as you glared at him. Walking across the room, you stood in front of him and waved two finger at him. 

"Move," you said. 

"Tom took my spot and Gina sits beside John, I'm tired of sitting on the floor," he exclaimed. 

"You were fine with it all night," 

"That was when Lucca was sitting with me," 

"Andre," you groaned and pouted out your lip. He rolled his eyes at your childish behaviour and wrapped his fingers around your wrist, pulling you down with force till your butt landed in his lap. "What the hell," you huffed. 

"Just shut up and drink your wine," he said while passing you the glass half full of red wine. 

The night went on, more drinks were drank, and Andre's hand kept creeping more and more up your thigh. The whole benefits part of your friendship wasn't something you openly shared with your friends, so you constantly were grabbing his hand and pulling it away from your thigh. It seemed the other three never noticed or cared to question it - in their eyes you two were just good friends. 

"I'm going over to Rebecca's," Tom stated while standing up. He had finished his last beer and you could see just how buzzed he was from the glossy look in his eyes. You had no clue who Rebecca was, but if you had to guess you'd say it was his current hook up. 

"Kay," Andre nodded. 

"You think you can mange getting to the apartment yourself?" Tom questioned, teasing Andre with a smirk across his face. 

"You think you can manage getting it up?" Andre asked, raising a brow at his pretty tipsy roommate. You nearly spat out your sip of wine, having to cover your mouth with your hand while John let out a howling laugh. Gina slapped him on the chest and muttered their sons name, warning him that he was indeed asleep upstairs.  

Funny," Tom said, "I'll be back home in the morning," 

"Have fun," you said while he made his way towards the front door. 

"See ya guys," he waved and slipped into his shoes. Everyone said their goodbyes before he opened the door and left. You lifted up your glass, which Gina had emptied the bottle into a while ago. Another few sips and it'd be gone.

"So next weekend," Gina paused in order to get your full attention, you raised your eyebrows at her and she continued, "you're free to come to Disneyland with Lucca and I, right?" She questioned, "Cali girls trip," she smiled. 

"I should be, unless something big happens at the shop," you shrugged and then took a sip. Andre's hand was inching up again. By now your mind was fuzzy with the amount of wine you have had and you were thinking dirty thoughts. 

"Good, it'll be fun," she smiled. Then John yawned, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. "Looks like it's almost time for bed for this one now," she teased. 

"I'm fucking tired," John grumbled while holding his head in his hands. 

You took another sip of your wine before looking over your shoulder while Andre was leaning back against the chair. "Want to share an Uber?" You asked. He knew what you really meant. 

"Sure," he nodded while rubbing circled on your inner thigh. Just a little too close for comfort, you grabbed his hand and got up out of his lap. 

"We're out," you announced as Gina and Andre stood up as well. You hugged Gina and then she took your now empty glass of wine. "Thank you for having me over tonight, dinner was great," you smiled. 

"Anytime, babe," she said and returned the smile. 

"You girls and your pet names," John shook his head. 

"You're just jealous," you teased while twirling a piece of Gina's hair. John rolled his eyes at you while the two of you girls laughed. 

After Andre and you said your goodbyes, you walked out their front door and walked towards the awaiting Uber. Andre held the door open for you to get in first, then he slid in beside you. His hand landed comfortably on your thigh again as he greeted the driver. 

"My place or yours?" He asked. 

"Yours, it's closer," you smirked. Andre caught the look in your eyes, squeezing your thigh before giving the guy his address. Once the car got going, you leaned into Andre and watched the bright lights go by. Maybe you had a bit too much wine. 

Upon arriving at Andre's apartment, which he shared with Tom, your head knocked against the back of the front door while Andre cupped your bottom and latched his teeth on your bottom lip. You moaned, he groaned, and things only got hotter from there. Clothes flew around his room, you were practically thrown onto the mattress, while Andre used his tongue in other places than your mouth. Tonight it was his headboard hitting the wall behind it, with which thrust your moans grew and you screamed his name with no shame of the neighbours hearing. 

At least an hour had passed as you laid on your side and stared at the blank wall in front of you. Andre fixed the blankets over the two of you and threw his arm over your waist. Yet somehow in the process of doing so, he punched your hip. 

"Ow," you gasped. 

"Oh fuck, sorry," Andre's eyes were wide as you turned around and punched him back. You went to hit him again, but he grabbed onto your wrist quickly and raised his brow at you. "One for one, babe," he said. 

"Fine," you huffed and relaxed against him instead. Your legs tangled together while you rested your head on his chest. 

Some time passed, silently, while you moved up and down with each breath Andre took. There was something soothing about hearing his heart beat and feeling his breath on you. Your eyes slowly grew heavy, finally shutting while you still were in some sort of state of consciousness. 

"I could beat the shit out of you," you mumbled against Andre's chest - clearly referring the the little fight that had just passed. 

"I know," Andre sighed. You couldn't see his face, but you knew he had smiled afterwards. "Godnatt," Andre mumbled into your hair. You smiled and almost instantly fell asleep in his arms. 

That night you had one of your more realistic dreams. Andre was your boyfriend, you two held hands while walking, there was a dog and a big house on the lake front. It was pretty nice, you weren't going to lie, but it was only a dream. When you woke up the next morning, you'd hurry out of there before Tom got home and got into the shop before anyone else did to bake till the dream left all thoughts.

#andre mine #andre burakovsky #andre burakovsky imagines #washington capitals #washington capitals imagine #nhl imagine #nhl imagines #hockey imagine

[ghostsinthewoods]

Chapter 8: The Mines

Mae hadn't slept well the night before. She'd been asleep for the usual ten hours, sure, but she didn't feel rested. Germ's words had been stuck in her brain. She'd tried to dismiss what he said about seeing someone at the mines, but she couldn't. Everything was swimming around in her head.

When Mae woke up from her dream about a sky filled with trees and a party filled with noise, she had already decided on going to the mines. She wasn't going to be able to sleep properly until she saw this guy herself.

Mae hurried on downstairs without logging onto messenger. Bea, Gregg, and Angus were all probably at work, so there was no point in using it to say where she was going. Besides, Mae was just heading out to take a look. They didn't need to worry.

When Mae got down to the bottom floor, she decided it would still be best to go and talk to her mom. Mae turned the corner and walked past the stairs, into the kitchen where Candy Borowski was sitting.

She wasn't reading one of her books this evening. It was a newspaper. Mae's mom had been reading newspapers a lot more lately. Mae could guess why. She was probably hoping to find some news about Aunt Molly.

It hurt to think about that, though.

"Morning, mom," Mae said as she hopped up onto the kitchen counter.

Mae's mom looked up from her paper and gave her daughter a warm smile. "Good morning, movie star," she said. "How did things go last night?"

Mae didn't know how to answer that. They hadn't done a whole lot of movie-making, after all. Mostly, they'd just wandered around in the woods and confronted the weight of their past sins.

"Kinda slow," Mae said after thinking about it a bit. "Got kinda weird after. We saw Germ with a torch in the woods."

"A… torch?" Mae's mom repeated. She barely knew who Germ was, but Mae got the feeling that even she was starting to get a good picture of Germ's weirdness. "Like, a literal torch?"

"Yup," Mae said. "The kind you use to chase Frankensteins."

"That can't be safe," Candy mused. "What if the fire spread? You could burn the whole forest down."

"Well, they'd have more space for parking lots," Mae joked.

That got a laugh out of her mom. Good. A laughing mom cheered Mae up most of the time, and this was one of those times. Her work done, Mae leaped down from the counter.

"Well, I'm heading out," Mae said. "Got some stuff I wanna check out."

"Check out, eh?" Mae's mom asked curiously. "Ooh, is this good news? How's the job hunt going?"

Oh, God. The job hunt. Mae had promised her mom she'd start looking for a job. She'd completely forgotten after everything with the Dream Casey had started up. All in all, Mae had applied to maybe two places in, like, a month, and she'd been turned down by both of them.

"Still waiting to hear back," Mae said quickly. "But, y'know, fingers crossed."

"Fingers crossed," Mae's mom repeated. "Okay, bye-bye, sweetie."

Mae let out a quiet little sigh of relief as she turned to exit the kitchen. She felt guilty about lying to her mom, but she didn't want to let her down, either. Of course, Mae felt like the longer she went without finding a job, the more she was letting her mom down.

It wasn't easy, though. Mae's work experience didn't exactly inspire confidence. Not to mention, most of the business-owners in town knew her as the girl from the softball incident. Either that, or the girl who'd once tried to climb the flagpole outside of the school.

She wound up getting stuck on top of that flag pole for nearly six hours. The fire department had to come in to get her down, but she ended up just falling off of the pole and landing on Tim Whitley.

Oh, yeah. That was another person Mae needed to make amends to.

Mae had completely lost her train of thought by the time she made it to the front door.

Mae had more or less made a beeline towards the old basketball courts that sat on the edge of the woods. She didn't stop to say hi to anyone, which was a bit weird for a social butterfly like herself. Mostly, Mae just didn't want to worry anyone, or let anyone see her acting strange.

It was just one guy, right? Mae probably didn't need help. No need for her friends to get all scared and protective and stuff. Probably.

Of course, once Mae made it out to the Food Donkey parking lots, she realized she'd forgotten one little detail: Germ. The little guy seemed to always be hanging out in the parking lot, and today was no exception. There he was, right in front of her.

He'd already seen her, so there was no way Mae could just, like, walk past him. Or maybe she could? It'd be rude, but Germ probably wouldn't mind. Germ was kind of a rude dude himself.

Whatever. Mae decided the best thing would be to just wave as she passed him by.

So she did just that. Mae gave Germ a friendly smile and lifted her hand as she walked past him.

"Hey," Germ said. Then, he immediately began following Mae.

It took Mae a few feet to realize he was tagging along. She stopped, turning around and looking at Germ. He had the same, Germy expression on his face. Mae had seen Germ smile, but it seemed like even when he was happy, Jeremy Warton defaulted to a blank, mysterious stare.

"Were you following me?" Mae asked slowly. Obvious question. If he was just walking home, he wouldn't be directly behind Mae. He'd be off to her right, to walk past the stairs and the basketball court. As it was, he was poised to walk up the stairs along with her.

"Yeah," Germ said. "You going to the mines?"

God dammit. Was Germ psychic or something? "Yeah…" Mae said slowly. "I'm just gonna check it out. See if I see the weird dude you saw."

"I mean, he didn't look all that weird," Germ said. "He just looked like a normal dude. Except he was staring at the mines. For, like, a long time."

"Yeah, see? That's weird." Mae said. "Nobody should stare at mines except for, like… miners."

"I mean, I can show you where I saw him," Germ said. "You probably shouldn't be out there alone anyway. You look bad."

He was probably right. Mae's head was throbbing, and her whole body felt tired. It was a repeat of last November, alright. Maybe not as bad, but definitely not good. Still, Mae didn't exactly like him pointing it out. Stupid, concerned Germ.

"I'm fine," Mae mumbled. "I'm good. You don't have to follow me, Germ."

"Okay," Germ said. "I'm still going to, though."

"I appreciate your honesty," Mae said. She sighed, too tired to argue this any further. "Fine. Adventure time with Germ. Let's go. You'll see what you missed out on last year."

The gang had filled Germ in on what had happened to them a few days after the incident in the mine. He'd thrown dynamite into a well for them, so it was the least they could do. It was difficult to tell how much of the story Germ believed, but he at least took their story seriously. Seriously enough to stake out the mine fairly regularly, it seemed.

Mae continued to march her way up the stairs that connected to the old basketball court, Germ in tow. Mae didn't know if this place had ever really been used for basketball. Mostly, it was just a place for the local skater kids and Gregg to hang out.

Well, Gregg had tried to be a skater kid. Tried and failed. Repeatedly.

It wasn't much of a basketball court now, though. There were no basketball… towers. Is that what you called them? Mae was going to call them that from now on.

"Hey, Germ," Mae said. "What do you call the… things you use to play basketball? Like, the big sticks with the baskets on them."

"Hoops," Germ said.

"What? The whole thing is called a hoop?" Mae asked. "But, like, the only hoopy part is the baskety thing. Why is the whole thing called a hoop?"

"It's the rules," Germ said simply. "You gotta call it a hoop."

Okay, this was all just making Mae more upset. Basketball was stupid.

Woods, woods, woods. Mae felt like a significant portion of her life in Possum Springs was spent in the woods. The woods were where the parties were held, and where teens got up to their nonsense. Even these woods, which were supposed to be off-limits, had seen their fair share of teenage malarkey.

Walking this path made Mae nervous. Her last few experiences in these woods weren't exactly good. She'd been shot at, for one. That was kinda bad. The second time, someone else had gotten shot, but they kind of had it coming.

Hmm. Mae hoped nobody got shot at this time.

"Hey, Germ," Mae said, "you live close by, right?"

"Sorta," Germ said. "Kinda. I don't tell anyone where I live."

Mae nodded. "Yeah, I think Gregg mentioned that once. Is your family, like, really embarrassing?"

Germ shook his head. He was walking side-by-side with Mae now. That was kind of nice. Mae liked hanging out with someone she was taller than. Hopefully, Germ wouldn't grow any more in his life.

"I like to keep my home life and social life seperate," Germ said. "I mean, I almost invited you over to dinner once."

That caught Mae off-guard. That was mostly because the idea of eating dinner at Germ's house was so mysterious. For some reason, Mae pictured Germ's family as, like, a clan of trickster wizards. That was probably wrong, huh?

"It was last year, when you were going through your stuff," Germ explained. "I thought you deserved a chance to, you know, chill. I decided against it, though. I was nervous about you meeting my gramma."

"The spooky one?" Mae asked.

"The only one," Mae said. "But, yeah, she's real spooky. I was worried she'd scare you off. She's kinda weird."

"My granddad was kinda weird," Mae said. "He kept a tooth in a safe."

"That's some secret society shit right there," Germ said.

The trees were beginning to clear away as they grew closer and closer to the mines. They were nearing the old mining equipment now. It was a graveyard for the things that had built up Possum Springs. It was so weird to think of what this place must have been like, and what the town must have been like, back when the mine was running. Back when the town wasn't dying.

Those guys in the mine said that what they were doing was keeping the town alive. Mae had given a lot of thought to what they'd said, but it didn't add up to her. Lots of bad things had happened since they'd started feeding that… thing. Businesses had closed, streets had flooded, people had died or gotten run over by runaway parade floats…

Had their sacrifices even done anything? Somehow, the idea that Casey died for no reason hurt even more than the idea that he died for some crappy old guys' retirement plan. Not like the reason mattered, really. But Mae wanted Casey's death to mean something, at least.

"Pretty amazing to be something, at least."

"Hey, Mae?"

Germ's voice brought Mae back to reality. Germ was staring at her. Was that concern in his expression, or just confusion? How long had Mae been standing there among the old machines and carts?

"Sorry," Mae muttered. "I spaced out there."

"Do you wanna take a few minutes?" Germ asked.

Mae appreciated that Germ hadn't suggested turning around entirely. With the way Mae's head felt, a rest sounded good. She promptly fell into a sitting position on the old, dusty ground. Germ joined her, his hands in his lap.

"I been up here before," Germ said. "Back when I was a senior."

Mae nodded. She hadn't been in Possum Springs then, of course. She probably spent Germ's graduation day sleeping in her room, trying not to cry. College had been garbage.

"Did you see anything weird?" Mae asked. Germ shook his head.

"Nah, it was a party. Tim Whitley was in town and wanted to do a, like, homecoming thing. Me, Casey, and Gregg went."

Mae chuckled. "Wow, you went to a college party in high school? I'm kinda jealous."

"It wasn't a lot of fun," Germ said. "It was cold and windy, and Casey spent all night making out with some girl. He almost didn't come home."

"Yeah, that sounds like Casey," Mae mused. "He was big on smooching, and being smooched. He was, like, the first one of us to actually get kissed."

Germ nodded slowly. Mae wasn't sure what that meant, exactly, but whatever.

"I've only kissed, like, two people," Mae said. She paused, and then decided to be honest. "Well, one-and-a-half. I don't think Cole counts that much. What about you?"

"I like skating," Germ said. "I don't have a lot of interest in, like, kissing. It's kinda dumb."

Mae considered Germ's view on things. Looking at him, she wondered if it was even possible for him to kiss someone. His beak was kind of… out there. Yeah. Probably poke someone's eye out. Then again, it was kinda round. Maybe it'd mostly just get in the way of things?

Wait, why was Mae thinking so much about kissing Germ? This was stupid.

"I mean, I might be interested if I really liked someone," Germ said. "But mostly I think I'd just want to, like, play video games and skateboard with them."

"Those are good relationship goals," Mae said. "I'd want to wrestle with them. Then live with them on a farm in Iowa."

"Iowa's big and empty," Germ said. "Good place for a farm."

"Yeah, I don't know why I wanna live with them on a farm," Mae said. "I've never really even been on a farm. Ever since I was a kid, though, I've wanted to, like, spend my life on a farm with… whoever. And have two cats, and a dog, and howl at the moon with them."

Things got quiet for a bit. It was nice out. The sun was in the sky, and the weather was pleasantly warm. Mae would probably switch to short sleeves sooner or later. Maybe. Eh. Changing clothes was a hassle.

Mae stood up and stretched out. Her head did feel a little bit clearer after resting. Germ stood up as well, and without a word, they were walking again. It wasn't much further until they reached the cliff overlooking the mine. Hopefully this time, they wouldn't see a bunch of dudes getting ready to kill someone.

Mae didn't like the silence, but she couldn't really think of what to say. Germ was kind of hard to start a conversation with. Back in January, she'd tried talking to him about getting some dynamite, and he'd started talking about the time he got a concussion.

Thankfully, they only had to walk for a few minutes. Soon, Mae and Germ were standing on the rocky cliff that Mae had stood on less than a year ago. Looking down at the mine, Mae half expected to see a gathering of hooded figures again. But no.

Nothing but rocks, and a thing that used to be a thing.

"Last time I saw him, he was down there," Germ said, and pointed to the spot in front of the mine's sealed entrance. Lots of rocks were poking out of the entrance's wooden frame. Jeez. That cave-in had really done a number on the mine, huh?

"Did he, like, notice you?" Mae asked.

Germ shook his head. "Nah, I'm pretty quiet. People don't notice when I'm watching them."

Mae took a minute to fully register what Germ had just said. "Wait, Germ, you don't, like, stalk people, do you?"

Germ opened his mouth to speak, but another, deeper voice interrupted him. It came from directly behind them, on the trail that lead into the woods.

"The hell are you kids doing out here?"

Mae let out a little scream. She couldn't help herself. She noticed that even Germ looked a bit surprised. Slowly, Mae turned, and found herself looking at a tall, middle-aged man dressed all in flannel, eyeing both of them suspiciously. He looked familiar, but Mae couldn't quite place it.

Possum Springs was a small town, so it'd make sense that Mae had seen him before. He was probably someone's dad.

Lots of people's dads were probably out in the woods.

Apparently, Mae wasn't the only one who recognized someone. The man squinted a bit at Mae, clearly trying to place her face. Mae fidgeted a bit, nervous as the man studied her.

"Wait, Mae? Mae Borowski?" The man said.

"Uh, no." Mae said quickly. "No, I'm… June. June Muddy."

The man's harsh, distrustful expression dissolved into a friendly smile. "Yeah, you're Mae, alright," he said. "The hell are you doing out here, Borowski? This place is supposed to be off-limits."

The man's eyes darted to Germ, whose nervousness had been replaced by the same blank expression. The stranger looked back at Mae, his eyebrow raised. "This isn't really a good place for a date. All these old rocks are death traps."

Yeah, Mae knew that better than most people.

"We aren't here on a date," Mae said.

"That somehow makes being out here even weirder," the man pointed out.

"I was gonna show Mae a dead buck I found," Germ said. His tone was completely natural and unchanged. Mae was surprised. She hadn't pegged Germ for a good liar. She wondered if Germ was constantly lying all the time, and no one realized it.

The man winced a bit, clearly grossed out. "Had it been shot?" He asked.

"Nope. Just dead."

"What's a dead buck doing up by the mines?" The man asked. "Deer usually don't come out here. Something about the place spooks 'em."

Mae could understand that. She had some firsthand spook experience with the mines. Deer were probably, like, super smart, and knew all about cults and stuff. But they weren't smart enough to avoid getting shot by hunters. Heh. Stupid deer.

God, though, who was this guy? He was weirding Mae out. She knew she'd seen him before.

"So, like, speaking of why people are at the mines…" Mae said, "Why are you at the mines?"

The man's smile seemed to falter a bit. He tried to hide it, but there was no mistaking that look. Mae often got that look when she asked people questions that she apparently shouldn't ask. Seemed like this was an off-limits topic.

"I come up here every now and then," the man said. "I worked up here for a while after I graduated from school. I started coming up here after they closed it down. Just, you know, to look around."

The man's attention seemed to shift beyond Mae and Germ, to the mine's entrance down below the cliff. Mae didn't like how focused he was on it. It was like he was trying to look through the rocks and stone.

"Looks like there was a cave-in sometime last year," the man muttered, his voice slow and thoughtful. "Probably some bootleggers messing around's what caused it. Hope no one was in there when it happened."

Oh god. Oh god. Mae felt a chill pass over her whole body. Did he know? Was he one of them? With the way he said it, Mae didn't know if he was just stating a fact… or accusing her. Even if he was a member of the cult, though, he couldn't know that Mae and her friends had caused the cave-in. Right?

Mae tried to say something to brush all of this off, but she couldn't find her words. She was speechless. That didn't happen often. Thankfully, Germ spoke up and saved her the trouble.

"Probably wasn't no one down there," he said. "I mean, most people avoid the mines."

Germ was certainly playing it cool. Well, as cool as he usually played it. Still, it was easy for him to stay calm. He hadn't almost died in a hole and communed with an eldritch horror. At least, as far as Mae knew, he hadn't done those things.

The man seemed to consider Germ's words, and then nodded. "Yeah, yeah," he said. "You're probably right there. I guess I'm worrying over nothing." The man gave a smile that was all teeth. It freaked Mae out a little.

"Well," the man said, "I'll leave you two alone to look for your deer. Say hello to your dad for me, Mae."

Was this one of her dad's old work friends? Mae only knew a few of them. She hadn't seen any of them since she was, like, eight. Mae doubted she'd really recognize any of them like she recognized this guy.

"Sure," Mae said. Her fear that this man was one of the cultists was about on par with her shame at not knowing who he was. "It was weird seeing you again, mister… you."

Well, that pretty much let the cat out of the bag. When he realized Mae had no idea who he was, a look of confusion appeared on his face. Also, he looked a little hurt? Mae might have just been imagining that, though. She might have been imagining a lot of things.

The man didn't correct her, however. He just gave her a brief nod, and turned to walk off the way he came. Mae watched him walk off until he was out of earshot, and then tilted her head to whisper to Germ.

"Dude," She said. "Was that the guy you saw?"

"I dunno," Germ said. "Maybe. Sure. I only saw him from behind. I mean, he seemed weird enough."

"Yeah, he definitely did," Mae said.

Mae watched the man shrink down smaller and smaller as he walked into the distance. Eventually, he disappeared on the horizon as he walked down the hill and out of Mae's sight. It wasn't until Mae was certain that he wasn't coming back that she let loose the breath she hadn't realized she'd been holding.

The walk back into town was quiet and uneventful. Mae was still trying to wrap her head around the things the man had said. There was no way he didn't know about people dying in the cave-in, right? That was how it seemed, at least. But did he know Mae had been involved? If he did, how did he know?

The gang needed to know about this. When Mae got home, she could contact them on messenger. Let them know what had happened. For now, Mae just wanted to get home. If she and Germ hurried, Mae would make it in time for dinner.

Mae had expected Germ to part ways by the time they reached the old basketball court, but he continued to follow her well into town. That was a little odd. Mae didn't mind too much, though. It was nice to have some company.

They stopped once they reached the Snack Falcon, and Mae turned to say her goodbyes to Germ.

"Hey, so, like," Mae said, "thanks for hanging with me today. It was good to have you around."

Mae thought she detected the faintest hint of a smile on Germ's face. She might have been imagining it, though. "No problem," he said. "I had fun."

That was surprising. "Did you?" Mae asked.

"Eh," Germ said, shrugging slightly. "I mean, it was a weird bad time, but it was cool to spend time with you. We should hang out more."

"I check in on you, like, every day, dude," Mae pointed out. That was true. She'd started thinking of the Food Donkey's parking lot as Germ's lair. Could parking lots be a lair? Did a lair have to have, like, walls and stuff?

Whatever.

"Yeah, I guess," Germ said. "I mean, it'd be cool to do something sometime."

"What, like skateboarding?" Mae asked. "I don't skateboard. Casey tried to teach me once, but I couldn't figure out how to turn." That had been embarrassing. A bunch of cool skater kids had watched her eat it. Still, she hadn't been as bad as Gregg.

Germ was quiet. He seemed to be thinking of something to say, but couldn't decide on anything. Mae was used to Germ just blurting stuff out most of the time. Him apparently not knowing what to say was weird.

"No," he said. "I mean, I'd kind of like to be better friends. Gregg's gonna be moving soon. It'd be cool to have someone to do something with."

Mae felt a feeling that she didn't have words for. On the one hand, what Germ was saying made her sad. Gregg moving away was, like, bittersweet. But, on the other hand, Mae got what Germ was saying. She really did.

If Gregg was going to be gone, maybe something could be made with the stuff he'd left behind.

'Left behind' didn't feel like the right word for it, but the sentiment felt right.

"I get you," Mae said. A smile slowly crept onto her face. "But if we're gonna hang out more, I've gotta ask you something. Tell me, Jeremy: what's your opinion on crimes?"

#night in the woods #nitw #nitw postgame #nitw fanfic #ghosts in the woods #fan fiction #germ warfare #mae borowski #postgame #part 8

[musicmapglobal]

Fortune Shumba

Recently we premiered a track from a devilishly good digital dub EP entitled Dubokaj Meets Fortune Shumba, and immediately we wanted to know more about the singer adding his honeyed vocals to the Swiss producer’s ‘Alpine Dub’. As the title suggests, that singer is Fortune Shumba, a Joburg artist originally from the township of Mpumalanga.

After discovering music while cleaning his father’s taxi cabs, Fortune Shumba determinedly set out on a creative path that was not without its pitfalls. From being ripped off by unscrupulous promoters to getting accidentally stranded in Texas, it’s fair to say the smooth-voiced singer hasn’t had it all his own way. However, aided by a diverse range of influences and his irrepressible artistic energy, Fortune Shumba is showing that there are few barriers to self-expression that can’t be overcome. Read on to learn the rest of his compelling story…

MusicMap: We recently premiered a track from your EP with Dubokaj – what were your favourite moments from those recording sessions?

Fortune Shumba: Hard to pick! I could say the lunch breaks? But then you’ll say I eat too much hahaha so… it has to be when I was first being introduced to the instrumentals with no words and I had to come up with melodies that would perhaps enhance the songs (cause honestly they were already dope without my vocal!). Also cause this was new territory I was branching into, as far as the genre. I’d never really made dub before this.

How did recording with Dubokaj differ from your usual studio experiences?

He really lets you be as weird as you wanne be without giving you the eye LOL! He pays fine attention to fine detail, if a recording take has one tiny thing bothering him he will not be afraid to tell you to do another one. He also has a no rules policy, he makes music that feels good but there is no specific formulae. Anything goes!

Where would be the ideal place to listen to the EP, in your opinion?

With friends once everyone is super baked or alone in bed and in your feels (and/or baked). Bottom line is, it’s even nicer when you are baked. Promise you.

You’ve previously said your music is inspired by dreams – what’s the strangest dream you’ve had recently?

I keep dreaming of my late grandmother, and her house, it’s a recurring dream. But in these dreams there is a huge flood headed our way (My mom, younger brother and I keep driving to escape by driving away). She most probably misses me as much as I miss her. We used to visit her place every holiday and spend some time together. She was a poet and a school teacher so we’d spend most of our time writing or painting or something creative. I guess I also miss that life, hence these never ending dreams about that and tons of flashbacks from my childhood, suddenly.

You’re originally from Mpumalanga. How would you desribe it, and how does it compare to living in Johannesburg?

Mpumalanga is very quiet and reserved. I grew up in a simple, small township and not much really goes on that side. As a kid I was really errm.mo different (or weird depending how you look at it really…). So, as you can imagine – I did not have that many friends, hardly ever went out.

But I have some great memories of my time there. I know we had loads of trees at home so that meant we never had to buy Mangoes or Avos or Bananas. Some great weather too. I realise now how lucky I was because I moved to Joburg and had to pay a fortune for a tiny avo and it’s usually really cold. Nelspruit is generally relaxed.

Loads of WTF moments about Joburg however! Like, the fact that everyone is minding their own business and always on a rush to somewhere. No friendly hellos and smiles from strangers like back at home here. Everyone is on their daily hustle and no one trusts anyone or feels the need to get to know anyone. But also this is an exciting thrill, this pushes you to push yourself! I am still trying to get used to this rush and just being here and I moved here like a year ago already.

Can you send us a photo of the view from your window?

What sort of music were you exposed to when you were growing up?

Kwaito first, my father was a taxi driver who later went on to start his own taxi business. Before he and my mother divorced I was exposed to the taxi life almost everyday. My dad played a lot of Brenda Fassie, Soul Brothers and Yvonne Chaka Chaka in his cars.

When he expanded his business there were more taxi drivers involved, each one had their own different taste in music and since it was my duty to clean the “mini-bus” taxis upon their return every night, I’d go through each driver’s music catalog and sing my heart out while doing my “chore”. You’d get guys that would play Brandy or Whitney or Destiny’s Child or Luther or Celine or whatever, the more younger drivers would have more edgier Kwaito and House stuff like Boom Shaka or Arthur Mafokate or Mandoza or Brenda Fassie or even Oskido. Then you had those drivers that liked American rap, your Ja Rule and DMX and Jay Z or Biggy or Pac. I played everything!

My gran played a lot of Dolly Parton so I was exposed to that too. She’d cry over it or dance or whatever cause it reminded her of a friend that had passed on. My grandfather from my dad’s side was from Zimbabwe, he ran a drinking shebeen for the villagers to drink at and he normally played a lot of Zimbabwean records, really loud. We’d normally dance to that and the people who were there to drink would form part of our audience and would sometimes throw some money at us.

I then grew a little older and went through my little gothic phase (picture this, a township kid in a public school who is goth and queer). I was listening to 5FM which was considered a “white station”. Radio introduced me to bands like BLK JKS, Panic at the Disco, Freshly Ground (first live show I saw and to this day I aspire to be as liberated as Zolani was on that day) and so forth. I was also listening to Evanescence, Paramore, Green Day, The Killers, Daughtry, Queen, Adam Lambert and 30 Seconds To Mars.

Then I kinda outgrew that and started listening to a lot of world music, loads of Busi Mhlongo and Jabu Khanyile and Bholoja and Dobet Gnahorè, some Sade too.

When I was in high school I began dating a guy who was older than me and was a die hard Bjork fan. I jumped on that too, became super obsessed. Oh I loved Beyonce (still do), my playlist had some Rihanna, and some Missy Elliot, some Pink, some Madge, Bowie, Grace Jones. I liked the pop artists who were super visual and were pushing boundaries.

And then when I would still go to church one of the American missionaries who’d visit our house regularly told me about Florence and The Machine and Kate Nash and a bunch of very quirky and alternative Brit acts he liked. I was genre hopping a lot growing up.

When did you start making your own music and what was it like?

First time recording, I was in 10th grade and it was a hook [by] a guy called Pressure, a rapper neighbour of mine at the time. Never got to hear that mess after recording it and also, I was glad cause I hated it so much OMG I thought I had a really annoying voice!

Since I spent a lot of time with my writer gran, I became a writer and poet first before even deciding to sing my own songs. In 2013 when I went to University I was yearning to record music suddenly. I’d skip some classes and link up with some guy in the city who had promised to make me a star. I paid him for studio time from my own savings without telling my mom and he got these two guys to produce a house song for me and it was not as bad as my first attempt with the rap hook.

The two guys disappeared with the song and my damn money. The other guy who’d said he’d make me famous vanished too. So I never got to hear that song too, post- studio session.

Later on during the June school holidays in that 2013 whilst visiting a friend of mine from back home who had his little backyard studio set up, just a mic and mixer – nothing fancy but heeeeyyy. He played me a tribal house beat and I started free styling over it, he lost his mind completely. See, I was not that confident in my singing, he kinda hyped me up and talked me into recording that song the next day. We ended up doing an entire mixtape and I was like “I love this shit!”. I realised I really enjoyed singing more than anything.

I went back to University and wrote more music while other kids were studying hard for exams, it was an otherworldly experience honestly and I had been sucked into this fantasy land where I could be anything or anyone I wanna be through song. I ended up dropping out of University where I was studying Accounting and pursued the music thing full time. And yes my parents were disappointed in me, severely… but I could care less. I felt free through making music.

Does your local area influence the music you make?

Definitely! I mean… as a writer you find inspiration in almost anything and Jozi is like a melting pot of cultures so inspiration finds you all the time. I started being more outgoing, braver and edgier when I moved here. I grew into my own, away from all I knew back at home. The people I hang around with now, the spots I go to, just my general view of the big city and its impact in my way of living and thinking has definitely influenced my sound somehow.

Who’s your biggest South African musical influence, past and/or present?

Present: Die Antwoord, Black Coffee, Thandiswa Mazwai. Past: Brenda Fassie, Boom Shaka/Lebo Mathosa, Busi Mhlongo, Jabu Khanyile.

What one place should music fans visiting South Africa see or do?

Definitely Maboneng. Very artsy vibe. Real African experience. There’s usually shows happening and there’s a back packer too, loads of places to get wasted at and buy some trees. Really tourist friendly and all the cool kids hang out there so there is some great company too.

What’s the biggest challenge facing musicians in South Africa right now?

People do not wanna pay for our stuff out here ’cause the respect for our craft is not really there. Though you do get lucky sometimes.

Promoters also do not pay artists and if they do it’s not what they are worth. And you get festivals that will book the same acts every year and shut other kids out. I could go on cause there’s a lot but that is up there in my top three… oooh also, no radio or tv air play for the kids who try to bring something fresh and original.

Where in the world would you most like to perform?

Does “All over the world” count as a valid answer? Lol Would really love to play a huge stage at a European festival. I really love Europe. I think I was meant to stay in Europe?

What’s your favourite album of all time?

This is so difficult. I will go with Bjork’s Vespertine.

What’s your favourite track of 2017 so far?

Besides my own of course! I really like Sevdaliza’s ‘Bluecid’.

Finally, Fortune Shumba, what are the luckiest and unluckiest things to happen to you in life so far?

Unlucky: Losing both my maternal and paternal grandmothers around the same time. My messed up relationship with my father. My parents divorcing when I was a kid… getting lost at night in Johannesburg on my first week of being here… what else? I got drunk at SxSW last year and got on the wrong bus back to the hotel, ended up stranded in the middle of nowhere in America and I had a flight to catch the next day. Also being molested at a young age changed my entire life and not being able to talk about it. And recently I was supposed to go to Switzerland for three months and my Visa got declined. Too many things to mention really… LOL

Lucky cause I am still alive and able to create music. Lucky to have a loving and supportive mother and siblings. Lucky to be free. Freedom is not known to others.

#black coffee #afro #Bjork #Boom Shaka #Brenda Fassie #Busi Mhlongo #Die Antwoord #dub #Dubokaj #Fortune Shumba #Jabu Khanyile #johannesburg #Kwaito #Lebo Mathosa #Maboneng #Mpumalanga #queer #Sevdaliza #south africa #Thandiswa Mazwai