#and feels very likely as well bc there’s a mutual desire

[scary-senpai]

Idk. Felt cute, might delete later:

—Oi, wolfboy. Sit.

Suiryu watches him with the patience of a river carving itself into rock. The effect on Garou is the same; wearing him down as he wears away.

Garou narrows his eyes. —Why?

Suiryu sighs, shaking his head. —Why, why…You love that word, don’t you?

But Suiryu is already shifting his body, making more space, trusting that Garou will follow as surely as smoke follows beauty, or night follows day.

Above them, the sky flares with the first flames of a firebird sunset. Lurid hues of orange, and red consuming pallid shades of yellow and blue.

Garou is shivering. From the cold, from the scene, and from something else. He digs his fingernails into the bare flesh of his crossed arms. He shouldn’t feel like this.

—Sit with me, Suiryu says. Please.

But Garou’s body is already moving for him, toward him, moving on its own. There’s no question of heart; it doesn’t occur to him. But the answer comes easily enough.

Suiryu watches with a sly smile and eyes you could drown in—how chilling, how dark, how deep.

Garou stares back with eyes like flame; with a gaze as readily kindled as extinguished.

#one punch man #opm #opm fanfic #garou #garou x suiryu #idk probably won’t delete? Unless I come up with a wildly better draft and even then #my drafts are like my children I love all of them equally #it’s just that some of us are no longer on speaking terms #if you couldn’t tell it isn’t going to end well #I think I am getting tripped up writing this bc at that age / in this scenario I am definitely Suiryu #as in ‘indulging people’s desires without understanding that they have different feelings about sex than I do”’ #‘so uh we did some stuff last night… technically what does that make us?🥹’ ’idk dude very close friends?’ #I bring a ‘consenting adults are free to explore whatever mutually beneficial arrangements best suit them’ to the conversation #that many heterosexual men do not like to hear from a 21 y/old girl #(and still don’t really like to hear from a 30-something woman tbh) #anyway sir please kindly get dressed and leave my dorm room I would like to go back to drinking $5 Trader Joe’s wine & reading atlas shrug #*shrugged #plot twist ! the entire time I was asexual which in retrospect explains a lot

[qweerhet]

i am very, very much not a fan of how the conversation around “transmascs experiencing body image issues after going on testosterone” has been dominated by “what do you expect, that’s what hormones do, you’re not going to look like your anime twink waifu, don’t transition if that makes you upset”

primarily bc it’s shifting the focus away from the violent policing of men’s bodies under systems of oppression that are causing transmascs to have these sudden onslaughts of body image issues to begin with

like, cis men experience these exact same body image issues

cis queer men are socially punished for not being skinny, pale, hairless, and for balding. like, bears are a counterculture within queer spaces for a reason. fat, balding, hairy, nonwhite, and visibly varsex men are heavily policed in the queer community and the subject of a vast amount of intracommunity violence. they’re excluded from community-building and mutual aid, seen as sexually undesirable, mocked, viewed as predatory and dangerous, and discriminated against systemically.

fuck, straight cis men experience this form of body policing as well. straight cis men are also expected to be skinny, albeit a different kind of skinny, and to only have the “correct” kind of body hair (often mocked for having neckbeards, having body associated with being varsex or a person of color, etc). they experience discrimination and violence for balding, being fat, etc etc etc.

suddenly having a body type that’s subject to violence is dysphoria-inducing. if you were viewed all your life as a skinny white girl, and now all of a sudden you’re viewed as a fat balding dude and read as predatory because of your body/facial hair, you’re going to experience a massive influx of fear, betrayal, and disordered thinking about your body. you are suddenly experiencing a wave of cisnormative body policing, ableism, and often a very different kind of targeted racism than you grew up being subject to--this is a massively fucking destabilizing experience.

pushing the onus of that experience onto individual people reacting badly to it is covering up, and even to some extent doing apologia for, the systemic racism, ableism, and cisnormativity that are shaping the responses to transmascs bodies. like, yes, that’s “just what testosterone does.” but how are you shaping the spaces you are in to react to bodies that are balding, that are fat, that are hairy, that have visibly conflicting sex characteristics, that have signs of disability like “weirdly-kept body hair” and “moving aggressively” and “talking loudly,” how are you making the people around you feel about these traits?

look at the spaces you move through--are they ones that uplift testosterone-dominant and otherwise varsex bodies? do they celebrate deep loud voices and neckbeards and chest hair and big noses and big shoulders and fat bellies and balding in their body positivity? do they view them as socially appropriate, as positive aspects of the space, as sexually desirable, as lovable? if not, then why are you expecting transmascs to view themselves that way?

#fuck it. i might as well tag this as #transmisandry #because damn if that word applies to anything. it's this.

[strwberri-milk]

incubus Lads boys where mc starts falling in love with them on accident 🔞🤭😫

HMM im seeing this as??? like. l&ds beginning a sexual relationship only to satisfy their incubus desires and mc falling in love w them thereby breaking their friends w benefits situation but also. its so sweet if both of them are in love and i kinda did that bc if i didnt itd be too angsty and i just like happiness ;-; - also pls mind the growing pains theres a reason why rafayels the only well levelled chara in my account <33 so uhh theres more mutual pining bc they both fell in love by accident :(

He was very clear about the relationship that the two of you would enter. You want companionship and he has a need that has to be fulfilled. It didn't matter that the reason why he asked you and you specifically was because he already knew that there could be nobody else. You are absolutely perfect for him in every way that matters - from the way you fit in his arms to the pretty way his name sounds on your lips.

Zayne did his best to keep things professional. He was sure to meet you on your terms, even if it felt like he was starving for your touch. He already felt awful about needing you as badly and as frequently as he does and asking to have you when he needs you feels like a line he just refuses to cross.

You on the other hand found yourself wanting to do just that. You had no idea if it was because of his nature as an incubus or if it was the slow growing of your feelings for him that made you want to see him again and again no matter how little time has passed. You wanted more than anything to be as detached as he was, not wanting to make things difficult.

It didn't matter though. You lay there catching your breath, watching as he dresses again after another night. Your eyes lightly dance over the way his suit slips over his strong arms, face barely flush as though the two of you had done nothing more than catch up over a cup of coffee. He doesn't say much - he's never been one to talk too much in your presence regardless - but when he looks at you you feel your heart stop.

You don't even realise that you're reaching out to him until you feel his lips press against your fingertips. Your eyes are wide, unsure what the gesture itself meant. You didn't want to get your hopes up of course, but when he presses his lips against your forehead in a show of affection before leaving you allow yourself a moment of limerence.

Xavier has a tendency to forget that he has other needs until he sees you've texted him or a photo of you that pops up on his phone as a reminder that besides the friendship you two have, there's another level to your agreements.

He found himself always being gentler with you than you might want him to be. It didn't matter how you'd ask him or if you tried to convince him that you can handle it - a part of him was terrified that he'd lose you if he misjudged your passions and worked you too hard.

You sigh breathlessly as he presses another kiss to your throat, feeling the weight of his body as he presses himself closer in the throes of pleasure. He feels amazing as always and the rush of energy he gets from your pleasure is already something addictive. He knows he can't be without you now that he's had you and he known that for quite a while.

He turns back around partway through getting dressed, thinking you were trying to tell him something. You've always been sluggish after have sex, playfully teasing him and blaming him for sapping too much of your energy. He watches carefully to see if you'll say anything else, softening even more when you reach out for him.

You know that you need him here with you right now, fully aware this whole time that you loved him more than you are ever allowed to. That didn't seem like something you could ever entertain but here in your pleasure addled fatigue all you could think about was the need to feel your arms around him as he held you to sleep.

The bed felt warmer in the morning and you're absolutely certain you weren't wearing these clothes last night. You're not sure if you're just imagining the smell of his cologne in your sheets but you bury yourself in them regardless, quickly falling back asleep with dreams of him.

Rafayel was fun - that's how you saw it. The two of you practically fell into bed once you came to an agreement of terms and your relationship made it easy for you to trust him. He made you feel good and perhaps it was just in his nature but he was just always so romantic. He's an artist so perhaps that was just your imagination but his absolutely needy nature for your attention always spilled into bed.

You can barely breathe when he's got his lips on yours again, stealing your breath despite not needing it. You willingly give it to him as you always will, knowing that the way you held him was not just to ground yourself but borne out of a visceral need that eclipsed whatever kinds he has. He holds you just as tightly, reassuring words whispered into your ear.

You couldn't help but fall in love with him. You adored him more than you could ever fathom, staring up into the glass panes of his ceiling as you willed yourself to get up and get dressed. He was already up and about, well energised from your efforts and you tried your best to will back the fear of being nothing more than an agreement for him.

He sees your hesitation and you can hear him pause at the head of the bed, raising his brow as you turn to face him. You're not sure what he sees when he looks at you, unaware that he would be pleased to do nothing more than admire you until the day he died. The two of you don't notice how much time passes, scarcely moving a muscle until he reaches out and cups your cheek affectionately.

#love and deepspace #love and deepspace x reader #rafayel x reader #xavier x reader #zayne x reader #zayne love and deepspace #love and deepspace zayne #rafayel love and deepspace #xavier love and deepspace #l&ds

[prettyboykatsuki]

are you awake yet

is it time to talk about boot humping bakugo

safe with you | k. bakugou

✮ cw ; afab + gn!reader, boot-humping but loving akjdkjd, mutual masturbation, facials, the title sir, sub!reader, soft dom!bkg , praise and adoration bc its bkg <3 18+

✮ wc ; 1.5k (??)

✮ a/n ; i am awake sorry this came at 3am though ajhjdjk. also they have a very established switch for switch dynamic. writing my yearly dom bkg content lmao

also this is not the most original concept but its my iteration so i hope thats alright

It's not even that he's being particularly demeaning to you. You'd have to initiate it, because Bakugou always has been a simple person during sex. He's always busy but he's home today after early dismissal. Has on those thick, black boots with hefty rugged soles.

He's cleaned them off after coming from his job. So clean the light of your living room is bouncing off the bronzey metal.

And you're sitting on the floor of your living room. You come crawling towards him mostly to rest your head on his lap or just give him a nudge. You notice he looks good. He always does. Has the most handsome face even when it's twisted into a scowl - at home it's relaxed. The soft curve of his jaw, the pull of his lips - all flat nose bridge and pretty, straight lashes.

Clean, shiny boots. His costume is still on. Mask is pulled up and pushing his hair back. He hasn't even taken off his gloves today, not yet. His arms are muscular stretched over his head in exhaustion. enough to see his midriff coming through. Wispy blonde hairs in a trail above the low hand of his pants.

You rest your chin on his knee and he looks at you fondly. Lovingly. even though he usually looks so mean there's a warm, watery look to his eyes as he reaches his hands out towards you. He rubs your cheek with his gloves on. Pets your head so tenderly it makes you feel like you'll melt into the floor.

"Hey," He hums, a small smile on his lips. so full of mirth you can't breathe "Miss me so much?"

"Stupid question."

"I'm rubbin' off on you more and more everyday," He says. You laugh because it's true.

"You look really good right now," You offer bluntly. His face splits into a grin. A smirk, really - the kind where it barely flashes his teeth. In another life he has canines, fangs sharp enough to rip through you.

"That right?"

This part of him, so riddled with confidence, always makes your stomach feel like it's burning. So often Bakugou is rational and relative. A little irritable, a little ridiculous. It's been a long road, and he's finally at that place where the confidence is well-earned. No longer misshapen inferiority tacked together with anger.

But real, unshakeable confidence. He believes you when you tell him that he looks good. He gets a little cocky about it, and it only ever makes him sexier. Only he could ever pull it off. A wave of desire washes over you, a heat. You nod absently, and it's like something switches in him. A tenderness that's sharpened with love, with want.

"You wanna do something about it?" He gathers, maybe from the look in your eyes. You nod and he smiles again, a little fiercer this time around.

"And what's that? Gotta tell me or i won't know for shit."

"On your boots. Wanna—"

"Wanna hump my fucking boots?" And he laughs, breathless, a tent pitching that you can see from where you sit "Really?"

"Uh-huh. Can I?"

"I'd never say no to you, sweetheart." he says, clicking his teeth like it's the most obvious thing in the world "Go ahead. Do it like you fucking mean it."

"Yes, Sir."

A switch flips off in him. You can see it on his face, the realization washing over him. He laughs a little to himself. So it's like that, written all over his face. You rest yourself on his leg, a feeling welling up inside of you that you can't describe.

You scoot a little. Line yourself up along the edge of his boot, your clit touching the roundest part. You're glad you're wearing shorts, even though you're so certain that they're going to be soaked through because the direct contact might too much. You're worked up and wet and aching.

Bakugou is gentle. He's kind, a sort of pride rolling off him in waves as he guides your head to his leg. You press your cheek against his thigh.

"Want somethin' to watch, baby?"

"Yes. Please." You answer back. Small and simple. He laughs a little but abides your request. You watch carefully with your head tilted, as he pulls his cock out from his pants.

Half-hard, thicker than it's long with the tip and aching red that leaves heat crawling up your neck. He reaches forward to you, cupping his palm and giving you a tilted smile. The removal of his gloves is so painfully deliberate. Calloused hands, but beautifully thick fingers. You spit in his palm obediently, staring as it drips down his shaft. He goes slow, palms fisted around the base of his cock as he strokes it.

"Go on," He encourages, tender but teasing "Make yourself feel good."

So you do. It takes a little effort to work up to the right rhythm. You have to hold onto his leg - feel the hardness of as you anchor yourself up enough to roll your hips. It doesn't feel good until it does. Until there's enough pressure on you that you moan out. Your eyes are fluttery as you stare Bakugou.

And he's watching you so intently, fixed on the sight of you underneath him. There's something that always borders on obsessive when you get like this. Makes his chest swell up with pride that you want this, want him enough to hump against the steel toes of his work boots. You look damn good doing it, eyes hazy and shorts slowly riding up - curve of your ass and the bend of your knee making it hard for him to breathe.

The room is so thick with lust you can taste it in the back of your mouth. Bakugou strokes his cock, melting into the couch - head thrown back but always looking at you. He reaches a free hand out to touch you, using his thumb to wipe drool from the corner of your lips.

"So damn messy," He say, tucking his thumb into your mouth "You're gonna ruin my work pants, baby."

"Sorry." You hum. He chuckles.

"Making a mess of my boots too, probably." He hums, low as you suck his thumb "Gonna 'em all shiny, huh?"

A whine escapes your throat, a garbled and desperate sound as something gets all knotted up inside of you. The descent is slow and impatient. Makes your breath hitch hard with such utter need. You can feel it, how good you're feeling. How wet your getting, how even through the material there's more of a slip than it would be. And every time you open your eyes up - Bakugou is staring at you.

Peering at your needy expression with red eyes, thumb over slit and shivering from his sensitivity. It's the sight of you that he's using to get off. He's excited watching you be desperate, watching your expression change into one of utter devastation.

You're his favorite, messy angel. The sweetest thing in the whole world when you're like this. It makes Bakugou want to take care of you. Guide you gently, patiently towards the edge. Pushes all of his pride down and replaces it with devotion hard enough to swallow you - to make the glassy look in your eyes feel so fucking earned.

He does earn it. Earns his titles, always. Like Sir is just as important as Mr. Dynamight. Always earns that sweet fucking face you make when he fucks you into a stupid mess. You're beautiful like that, really. Beautiful when you're ruined, when you give him the wheel to take you where you need to go.

He softens his voice for you, just enough timbre to make your insides hot and sticky. "You wanna cum, don't you? Wanna cum humping my fucking boot."

"Yes, Sir."

"So well-mannered when you want something." He praises, though it sounds a little mean "Look at you. Didn't even get to take my work clothes off."

You want to say sorry. You're too close to think of the fact he's teasing you and that part of you makes him wrought with affection.

You feel hot as you whimper.

"C-can I cum, Sir? P-please, oh, pleaseplease."

"Close your eyes, sweetheart." He says, a tremor in his voice "Let's cum together."

You close your eyes and listen well as you let yourself go. It takes you a minute to get there, but the minute you pulse the first time - you feel something hot spill out against your cheek. You think it gets on your clothes too but you can't really tell. You're too busy cumming with him, all of you unravelling as you pulse and thrash and hold on so tight to Bakugou like your life depends on it.

You cum hard - eyes still closed. You hear Bakugou mumble something above you as you catch your breath. Some plastic crinkling and the feeling of something wet wiping off your cheeks. You wait until he's done to peel your eyes back open.

"Still with me? Feeling okay?" He checks in. You yawn but don't move.

"Yeah. Wanna say here for a bit though."

He laughs, petting your head.

"You look real comfortable."

You laugh with him.

"I am. I kinda see why you do this so much."

A flush spread on his face.

"Shut up."

#bakugou x reader #bnha x reader #bakugou smut #bnha smut #writing tag #return to sender #its a miracle i managed to write this without collapsing into a fit of dust

[emeyuko]

Okay, already posted on Twitter in a long ass thread but lemme talk about Yosuke's confession again, the "i never knew i had such a heat inside" or this depending of the traslation

It's SO important cuz It really empathizes their relathionship pretty fucking well. Yosuke loved Saki bc she was the first person that saw him as something outside of the Junes kid who's parents are gonna ruin the shopping distritc (even if the way she feels about him was more complicated than that), she accepted who she was, talked to him, was nice to him

we know Yosuke is a person who gets interested in people easily considering his flirty behaviour, but i am pretty sure his feelings for Saki were genuine and that there's a pattern, Yosuke is a lonely kid that is used to be treated like trash most of the time, seeing someone saying this stuff to him, makes him embarrased and...happy, and it makes believe that he's into people who are genuinely caring and kind to others, including a random loser like him. if Yosuke loved Saki for that empathic and kind nature, who's the person that fits perfectly those two terms? Is basically the whole point of their character considering that he's a protagonists and how it mix with the message of the game? That's right, Yu.

There are some parallels with Saki and Yu, in lots of ways, Saki and Yu both has this kind behaviour, can be teaseful around Yosuke and they both are big siblings that really love their little siblings more than anything, but despite their cool easygoing and kind behaviour, they are implied to be really deppresed individuals, for Yu/Souji more specificed in the manga about his parents("i wish all could dissapear" is a very suicidal thought, that Saki's shadow herself mentioned, like if she has thought about killing herself before)

Saki made Yosuke feel slighty better with himself, how he shouldn't worry about what the others are saying around the town, because he knows that isn't true

Yu made him realize how nothing would change for him if he doesn't do something about himself, how he isn't alone and has everyone else and i would say he did more than Saki did.

Yosuke wasn't ready for a relathionship yes, but he slowly realized how much Yu mattered to him, how much he is "special" to him, Yosuke finds himself comfortable in Yu's presence, smth he didn't felt until Saki came in, so i think that's what "i never knew i had such a heat inside" means

he's a perceptive person that knew that his relathionship with Saki wasn't mutual ("i knew all they said was right, i was just too embarassed to admit it...") and afterwards he saw how much he had going on in her head "i wish everything could just dissapear", Yu actually reasurred him, his kidness was more in a "i do like you as a person" instead of "i am kind to you bc i would be a ass if i weren't", Yosuke probably fell even harder than he fell for Saki, he finally found a genuine connection, the most genuine one he could ever have, that changed his life for better.

And i think It really fits his character, he is really someone who desires a genuine connection due to loneliness, people who genuinely liked him, instead of treating him as someone they need from time to time, thanks to Yu he's closer to the team.

And no, some people may believe Yu was like a """remplacement""" of Saki but i do believe this is just a natural course, you cannot control who you get feelings for, and slowly, you get to know them and fall for them, i do know people who broke up/lost their ex before and some weeks later, they fell for someone else, and there's nothing wrong about it, time passes, feelings changes, some people faster or slower than others but it's natural, and Yosuke should allow himself to love someone else when the other already passed away

So yeah, i do believe he got to experience, even an stronger feeling than before and it makes sense, (Yosuke also realized how life slowly changes in his SL, fitting EVEN MORE with his character arc)

Saki is special, Yu is special, and that wouldn't change in any way, not even how he sees himself, bc thanks to this experiencie, he could finally say he's special in his own way.

#yosuke hanamura #souyo #otp: my heat inside #ANYWAYS here's me going bonkers with his confession again enjoy

[sophaeros]

golden trunks theory but i've forgotten how to do literary analysis:

so i think much like a lot of tbhc golden trunks is about a juxtaposition between intimacy/desire and the facade u have to put up as a public figure

like the opening verse/chorus are so starkly plain in the mental image they describe. it's just a simple portrait of an intimate night falling asleep together, and theres a very secretive tone created by the words "whispered" "admit". so from the get go we know immediately that it's about "true love" → romantic connotations, and this true love is associated w the night ie secrecy

this is a stark contrast to the second verse and bridge but esp the bridge where he plainly says "in the daytime". usually the day and light are associated w truth and revealing things but here he uses the daytime to talk about "a fresh new pack of lies", in contrast to the nighttime's "true love". the fact that the bridge is about being a celebrity and contending with lying for the sake of public relations is made very clear w how he says "bendable figures" → public figures who just bend/conform to the narrative crafted by pr managers, and most obviously w the use of the word "publicise". in an interview w la times hes asked if he enjoys being a pop star (w all the pressure and attention that entails) and he says "i have very little basis for comparison. the band has been going on for a larger fraction of my lifetime than it hasn’t." so as a very private person even leaving conspiracy theories about sexuality aside hes obv familiar w trying to keep the details of his relationships out of the spotlight. + this idea of the nighttime being the time for truth has been used before in diwk so it's a consistent theme

lots of people say the song about politics bc of the second verse cuz they say it's about (eugh) donald trump but i feel like thats a very surface reading. it's very out of place to me for him to have this randomass political commentary in a love song that he never brings up ever again which is why i dont think it's actually political commentary (or well, not Just, the pitchfork interview shows that is Is aware of politics obv it's just not the Point) it's just another angle to illustrate the idea of a public facing facade. he states in an interview that he thought of the wwf, which has given us the very interesting concept of kayfabe: the fact or convention of presenting staged performances as genuine or authentic. the public persona, like a wrestler w a dramatic theme song, is larger than life, rehearsed, beloved and famous, and also very much fake. 

this next part i said entirely as a joke making shit up while talking to my mutuals but then i was like wait maybe i was cooking. we're getting into more speculative rpf territory here but essentially i thought it was very interesting how he specifies that this is "the closest thing to a love song on this record", and also that the character it's centred around is one that he "made". many of his past love songs everyone knows are about his real actual love interests (eg shes thunderstorms was about alexa. alexa was a tv presenter) and now here's this song that is about simple, straightforward admittance of desire towards someone that doesnt exist. summed up in my og message to my mutuals, "hes singing to the amalgamation of his lovers an imaginary ideal to whom he can be simple and honest with in a way he can't quite bring himself to be in real life". i honestly feel like this gels well with the ultracheese's last two lines; a vague admission of guilt, of complicated feelings, vs capitulating to honesty and tiring of lying for the sake of pr ("i'm sure you've heard about enough"). + i find it interesting that golden trunks is that only tbhc song that has never been performed live

++ this idea of duplicity and lying has come up a lot in his discography but in tbhc specifically the bside anyways has the line "what a place for both the opposite sides / of my double life to finally collide"

and finally. the absolute funniest part of golden trunks.

Let me set the scene: sometime between Axl Rose getting braids (2002) and People Just Do Nothing jumping the shark (right now), those brothers in melodic yarns Turner and Kane, plus “another human being” – let’s call her “The Girl”, shall we, to save her poor mother’s heart condition? – are intertwined among the postcoital flotsam of an upmarket hotel room. “Hey, I’m glad you came,” Turner is alleged to have said, forever on the right side of etiquette and politeness in such matters. While Kane, in his sludgy Scouser lilt acknowledged, “Ah, thanks, man.” At which point Turner sat bolt upright in his sparkly gold briefs (unconfirmed) to stress who, in fact, his grateful aside was aimed at: “Not you, you wally. Her!”

sauces: - quotes curated by genius - la times - gq magazine / tumblr post

#my content #arctic monkeys #alex turner #arctic monkeys analysis #literally copy pasted this from my ramble to my irl i feel like i keep repeating myself but also not elaborating enough sorry 🥰🙏 #m just bored

[planetdream]

— SKZ AS SOFT DOMS <3

THIS POST CONTAINS ! smut [d/s dynamics. mentions of—cum. fingering. oral—f.rec. subspace. toys. aftercare.] minho has a longer part bc i love him <3

💌 writers block and i are fighting, and man, im getting my ass beat. hope someone likes this <3

CHAN ! is the sweetest soft dom on the planet. taking care of and showering you in praises is just something that comes naturally to him. chan has got all the patience in the world for you—anything you want and/or need, he'll give it to you, twice over. he's all about your pleasure, even putting it before his own. just loves being all sweet to you (making you cum is a bonus). and while normally, receiving praises makes him a bit shy, he loves when you vocalize how good he made you feel.

MINHO ! loves fucking you into subspace. once that film crosses over your eyes and you're mumbling words to him, holding onto him tightly, is when he realizes how much you've got him wrapped around your finger. minho would literally do anything to please you, and once you enter subspace, it gives him even more of a reason to be extra doting on you. sometimes, he can be a tease, but the second you tell him to knock it off, he'll give you whatever you want. for minho, i think a lot of it is also psychological, as well. he likes to softly take you apart, and sweetly put you back together again. you could try being anything but good for him and he's gonna give you a pout and tell you how 'this isn't you, baby'. easily putting you back into that good, subby headspace.

CHANGBIN ! sometimes can't help being rough, so he makes sure aftercare is super sweet. he's very playful with you—changbin doesn't want sex or the scene you've created to feel like a chore for you or him. i think changbin likes for you to be a pillow prince(ss), most of the time. all you need to do is sit back, relax, and be your pretty self; let him do all the work. absolutely loves it when you reach up for him, wanting to feel his skin against your fingertips. it makes him feel desired, which in turn makes him want to keep treating you.

HYUNJIN ! rewards you constantly—any and everything you do is deserving of a reward in his eyes. he's very sensual, too, as this is something the both of you are supposed to enjoy. honestly, he's quite a needy dom and hopes that you need him just as much, if not more than he needs you (and you do). hyunjin takes his time with you, not wanting to overwhelm you too much, and if you ever need to stop and take a break, he grants that—giving you space if needed or showering you in kisses and hugs.

JISUNG ! can't help but give you every single thing you want. you look up at him with those pretty eyes of yours and tell him the things you want him to do to you?? really, jisung being a soft dom is more about having fun together. shedding away some of the seriousness that comes with him being more of a hard dom or vice versa. can't get his mouth off of you—lips trailing everywhere on your body, planting wet kisses and sucking marks onto your skin. loves when you suck his fingers after they've already been inside you.

FELIX ! is a pleasure dom—he gets off on getting you off, it's like he's addicted to making you cum and feel good. loves mutual aftercare—you really care about his wellbeing and want to take care of him, felix appreciates that (it makes him hard, too). really enjoys getting all warm and cuddling after he's got you all cleaned up. from him eating you out, to fucking you open, to running a nice bath for you; it's a lovely bonding experience and felix is glad to share it with you.

SEUNGMIN ! loves taking care of his sweet baby so much. he's always extra reassuring, and if you're ever nervous or shy about (doing) something, he guides you through it—just take everything step by step, breath by breath. likes making you wear pretty plugs to get you all stretched out for him; making you keep it inside of you for hours until you're both ready. seungmin is patient, he has all the time in the world when it comes to you—which means he can be a tease and edge you sometimes. but he always rewards you for taking it so well.

JEONGIN ! likes to spoil you—showering you with kisses, cuddles, making you cum back to back on his tongue, fingers, and then his dick. spends so much time between your thighs just eating you out and when he's not fucking his fingers into you, he's intertwining them with yours, holding your hand through it. likes to give you small orders just to see if you'll obey them because he gets off on having power over you—and when you do, jeongin decides he has no other choice than to make you cum a few times as appreciation.

© PLANETDREAM 2022

#☁️ — daydreams #☁️ — daydream.skz #skz smut #stray kids smut #bang chan smut #lee minho smut #lee know smut #changbin smut #hyunjin smut #han jisung smut #lee felix smut #seungmin smut #jeongin smut

[seriousbrat]

let sirius (and james) be mean

Obviously in SWM both James and Sirius are atrocious towards Snape but I think it's pretty revealing how mean they also are to their best friends, especially Peter:

And while I think James possibly grew out of his mean girl phase to some extent Sirius didn't, at least not fully. To be fair he's usually not outright rude unless he dislikes someone-- mostly, he's dismissive or impatient especially when someone says something he perceives as stupid, as well as being overall insensitive to the feelings of others.

In the prequel they're both fairly insensitive and rude to two terrified Muggles lol, I mean who cares and it's funny but there are examples of Sirius being something of a mean girl later on as an adult. obviously, the famous one:

and yeah you can defend this by saying he was stuck in grimmauld place and frustrated, bla bla bla, I do get it and I still love him and don't think it makes him a terrible person or godfather but objectively this is an incredibly mean thing to say to Harry.

Other somewhat minor instances that nevertheless paint a wide picture:

OotP (I'm leaving out his interactions with Kreacher bc those are self evident)

-------

-------

he's also kind of dismissive towards Harry's feelings at certain points. A good example of this is the stiff "one-armed hug" and gruff goodbye he gives him when they leave for Hogwarts after christmas, or this earlier conversation:

Also, how he talks about Regulus. obviously it's somewhat justified since Sirius believes him to have just been a Death Eater, but he specifically calls Regulus stupid rather than just saying he was a bad person. This is interesting because it can be inferred that Regulus was not stupid at all, given that he figured out the secret of the Horcruxes. imo Sirius was too dismissive of his brother to actually know who he really was.

(and bonus him being snippy with Harry)

GoF

like this is probably true but it's still rude lol, as is this from OotP which has definite mean girl vibes:

next:

so this on its own doesn't seem especially mean but it does come after Sirius has basically dismissed every single thing that Ron has said lol, even raising his hand at one point to shut him up. It's not the worst but imo does indicate his impatience with "stupidity" which we also see in SWM:

and James has this too:

imo this shared feeling of superiority and mutual delight in their own intelligence were big factors in his closeness with james.

ALL THIS TO SAY, Sirius was mean lol ESPECIALLY as a teen. my rude scorpio child. So I think when writing teen Sirius it's an important part of his characterisation (and James's) for him not only to be rude/disdainful to people he hates but also just generally. It's also why it's extra ridiculous that he's portrayed as dumb in fanon seeing as he's very often dismissive and judgmental to those he perceives as being of lesser intelligence.

And this isn't a criticism of Sirius at all, I love him and tbh his mean streak is one of the things that make him so fun to write for me. He's a beloved character and I understand the desire to paint him in a positive light, but he wasn't perfect. As others have said the friendship between the Marauders wasn't something idyllic and aspirational, it's a warning story to Harry. Furthermore, kindness towards Kreacher being something that helps them find the Horcrux is also a lesson for Harry.

Sirius's insensitivity to the feelings of others was what got him killed, his insensitivity and disdain for peter led in part to James and Lily's deaths too. it doesn't make him a terrible person, just a flawed one.

#sirius black #meta #anyway stupid himbo sirius black is my villain origin #but so is doe eyed sweetheart who would never hurt a fly sirius #like just let him be a mean girl #this isnt as long as it seems rip theres just a lot of excerpts. #sirius #he's even kind of blunt to james with 'put that away will you' #and i love him for it! #he was also an eldest child i rest my case (so am i dont be offended)

[thswrtchdthng]

Okay here are some Magshawe prompt questions for your pleasure

1. Could Jonah kill Jonathan? Could Jonathan kill Jonah? I feel like they both have reasons to.

2. Who'd be willing to do cannibalism on the other?

3. Who do you think "died" first, Jonah's official death or Jonathan?

4. How do you think they met up?

5. Did they ever kiss?

6. Are they ever capable of being soft or are they stuck forever in passionate mode?

7. What if Dr.Fanshawe got time travelled to modern times and met Elias, would he fall again?

OH MY GOD THANK YOU SO MUCH

always coming in clutch, love that of you

1. well I've always thought of Jonathan as being quite a lot more physically strong than Jonah, so he definitely could kill him. I imagine it would be in a fit of that mix of rage and passion and fear and general morbidness that characterized the later part of their relationship. probably an accident too, and he'd feel equal parts like a hero for erasing an evil like that from the world and like absolute shit bc, well, he just killed the only person who understood him. he just killed his Jonah.

and as per Jonah, I don't think he could do it himself (even poisoning him or shit like that, it's just not his thing. I reckon he'd feel kinda meh about getting his hands dirty back then and he knows there are better things he could do). what he could do, and what he did in my interpretation of their relationship, is drive him to suicide. like just manipulating him and generally fucking him up emotionally and psicologically that he just kills himself yk. also in my brain it was a very gorey death, I might write something about that. of course, Jonah feels terrible about it too, but a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do yk.

2. cannibalism as a metaphor for love is so them. both. idk what it'd take for Jonah to do something like that but he's definitely not above it. I think a big part of his feelings for Jonathan in their later years together is the desire to metaphorically swallow Jonathan whole, which might translate to something literal. I'm not sure why or how, but he definitely could do it.

and Jonathan- well of course he could. I get the vibe that that desire to metaphorically devour the other was mutual, and along with his general Feelings by that point (the love, the rage, the constant panic, the distrust, the morbid curiosity) who knows what he could have done.

3. Jonathan. definitely. Jonah was not letting Jonathan outlive him, and I always thought the whole bodyhopping ordeal came as a surprise to him. so yeah he would've taken good care of Jonathan before anything.

although now that I think of it, the other option is also fun. Jonathan catching wind of the stuff going on both at the Institute and ar Millbank and being like "wtf are you doing now" but not wanting to give in to curiosity (and the need to see Jonah of course). Jonathan finding out about Jonah's 'death'!!!!!! he wouldn't know how to feel lmao.

4. hmmm I always thought they might have met at some sort of conference (those did happen back then didn't they) or symposium about some really morbid, really understudied branch of medicine (yk those that would piss off the church). Jonah did that thing where he starts asking the weirdest fucking questions like one asks about the weather and Jonathan was immediately like "he's so clever and interesting and curious and unashamed I need to talk to him" and they just hit it off

my second idea for a meetup is back in their university days. Jonah didn't study medicine (I have my own headcanon on that) but I think the general social scene was pretty open. maybe Jonah was out for drinks with some friends and saw Jonathan sulking in a corner and thought "interesting specimen, need to investigate"

a third idea I had was one of Smirke's little gatherings, but I wanted to see if I could come up with something new lol

5. yep. and much, much more. I imagine Jonathan was very reluctant at first, but by the time they first kissed the tension was unbearable and Jonah was already, well, a whore, so they were fine in the end (no they weren't).

6. wonderful question. I believe it's a mix of both. like their deranged passion has a bit of helpless softness mixed in, and back when they could be soft (before their entire relationship went to shit) even that softness held a passion that made it impossible to think straight.

7. oh that's a good one. for starters, it would be so fucking funny. like "what are you doing here" "what are YOU doing ALIVE. and how did you get there"

at first Jonathan would be absolutely outraged and disgusted by everything Jonah's done, but then, of course, he'd get curious. in my brain Jonathan was one of the first Flesh avatars, back when they were discussing whether the Flesh was real or not, so I think he'd have fun with that. and he was always big on the modification of the body from what it's born as to what you want it to be (Dr. Fanshawe said trans rights) so when he found out Jonah'd been straight up switching them around he'd be equal parts enraged and thrilled. can you imagine his reaction at how much medicine has progressed in the last 2 centuries? bby would be fucking elated.

Jonathan reading about modern medicine and being all euphoric while Jonah just watches him with heart eyes the entire time.

and it might get Jonathan far more into the Fears, especially into the Flesh. maybe he ends up like a different version of the Boneturner or something (and then monsterfucker Jonah kicks in and well, the rest is history yk).

this was so much fun tysm!!

#cw suicide mention #magshawe #jonahfanshawe #jonah magnus #jonathan fanshawe #tma #the magnus archives

[faejilly]

i absolutely love your sh meta so i was wondering what are your thoughts on Alec’d relationship with his sexuality bc i always sort of read it as him knowing that he was gay but absolutely not saying it out loud

absofuckinglutely nonny

There's an excellent post by amorverus that I cannot find the original of so have my reblog HERE that articulates it really well

I even wrote a fic about it! #shameless self promotion [tumblr / ao3] (That is, in fact, one of my favorite things I've ever written.)

I do strongly believe that Alec knew that he was gay, and felt no shame about that in and of itself. He is not offended by Magnus flirting with him, would not, I think, be offended by anyone else flirting with him, regardless of gender. (Tho prior to Magnus I also think he just... wasn't interested, but that's a separate conversation.) He knew, however, that it was not allowed in his culture and it would hurt his family and not just him if it came out.

(This is why Izzy makes me so uncomfortable in s1 regarding Alec, tbqh, because she lives there too, but refuses to see the danger to herself and, more egregiously in Alec's mind, because obviously she can chose to risk herself for him if she wants, for all he doesn't like it, but she's causing risk for their little brother if Alec is outed, and that's unacceptable. Even if I'm quite sure Max would agree with her priorities.)

I do, however, think Alec felt a lot of shame regarding his attraction to Jace. Jace was hurting and was supposed to be his brother and yet... Alec felt an attraction that he knew Jace wouldn't return. So he's got all the societal pressure on him not to be gay, and all this personal pressure not to manipulate or abuse someone in a vulnerable situation (because Jace was, even if he wouldn't admit it), PLUS all the normal human issues with feeling attraction for someone who is important enough to you that you can't lose them, and you can legitimately be terrified that if you can't get it under control you MIGHT... (Even more so for him than a mundane romantic vs platonic situation, obviously, because there's questions of command and exile and punishment, not just ruining an interpersonal dynamic in a way it never quite recovers from.)

Plus Alec's kind of also Jace's commanding officer which is yet ANOTHER unequal power dynamic, and he's supposed to be protecting an entire Institute, not just this one person, but he can't stop thinking about it because it's fucked up and he knows he should stop and he can't.

(Because, he realizes with the benefit of hindsight after he meets Magnus, by fixating on Jace he was safe, he was never going to fall in love for real with someone he might have a chance with, would never have to actually choose between his culture and his personal desires, while still telling himself that he already had, that he'd chosen his family and it was fine, he was FINE.

(He was so not fine.))

And so, even though he truly believes there's nothing wrong with being gay in general, he does believes there is something Very Wrong with him specifically being gay.

But he still never has any doubt about it. He never tries to project heterosexual interest in anyone, is very up front with Lydia about the terms of their engagement. (It seems clear, even if we never see that conversation, that they're both aware that their marriage would never be romantic or sexual unless they mutually decided to go the so-called traditional route for children.) And she agreed to it! She, unlike Jace & Izzy, had zero illusions about her relationship with Alec, and I ADORE HER FOR THAT.

And I've totally lost the thread of this rambling, I'm not sure I have a conclusion for you? 😅😅😅

Alec is, imo, refreshingly self-aware about most things, and many of his issues are legitimately external stupidity punishing him into a life of self-recrimination rather than him having internal bigotry or biases against his own sexuality in and of itself.

#jilly answers #Anonymous #the saga of #alec lightwood #honor vs duty vs shame #is really his life pre-canon #he throws away the shame tho #and I'm very proud of him for that #shadowhunters #my sh rambling #sh meta #queer as in #fuck you

[vole-mon-amour]

3x08, part 1.

Opening the episode with literally Jamie's name is !!! I'm already smiling. My boooy. <3 A streak of four wins just bc Jamie saw the flaw in Total Football, fixed it, and there we go <3

I am so incredibly sad for what Ted has to go through. This SUCKS. Some other man is bad enough, but your fucking therapist is a punch in the gut. Especially when you still have feelings for the woman you love, but she doesn't love you anymore.

I don't UNDERSTAND! If TedBecca isn't supposed to be romantic like Hannah and the writers say, why this? Like, yeah, they've been to the same party, obviously. And the mention is casual, "they're brother and sister to me", but I still see the foreshadowing. Like, I'm all TedTrent and bi Ted, but ????

Mae is so sweet. What a woman.

Seeing wlw in s3 of Ted Lasso was the last thing I expected, but hell yeah. Please don't make Jack evil. Please. If they're gonna break up, let it not be a scandal and a mutual breakup or something. However, I can see Keeley staying with Jack and Roy telling her he has feelings for Jamie and they hit it off pretty nicely. But that's just my shipper heart's desire. We'll see bc I don't think this show might be that bold.

I wonder how many women actually sleep with their bra on. It's the most uncomfortable thing EVER imo.

Keeley is such an excitable puppy. Just like Jamie when with Roy. :)

I'm actually surprised about Nate and Jade. Like... it's almost a complete 180? Idk, I still dislike him. I think I understand the point, be kind and and not judgemental, all of that, but I can't with him. I don't like him and his storyline. A lot of screen time was wasted on him when imo when it could've been something way more interesting.

She might as well might be a butch bi.

Laughing. Trent with his what I almost sure is an empty mug, just for the drama of it. Doesn't matter that he 'drinks' from it after. Show me liquid in there or I'm not fooled.

S1 Roy would never, and I'm proud of his development. Ted is one of his people now, isn't he? A good friend for sure. It's also very interesting for me to watch in terms of Roy's other relationships and interactions. He already went somewhat there with Jamie in Amsterdam, "I was a dick today, I'm sorry" and how he realizes that he often releases his negative emotions on Jamie "whether you deserve it or not".

Crying with laughter. Roy is ready to "talk about it", but definitely isn't ready to do THAT. It makes me feel good for getting this part of a relationship right in my fic, lmaoooo. Also, where is Higgins?

A real conflict here, hehe. Hopefully, one day, he's gonna be ready to join them and talk about it. That would be fun to watch.

Higgins summoning succeeded.

What are you doing there, Helga soft boy, with your sparkling pencil? This makes me think of that "Jamie — Jamie" thingy. Yeah, no, Roy and Jamie are in love.

This is more like a soft howling/whining :')

Babe, wake up, new reaction meme just dropped.

He sure does, but he's still repressed about it.

Trent Crimm woof'ing with a soft look on his face can be SO personal. I love him, your honor. I wonder what he'll write in his book about that. I also wonder when is Roy gonna join them. Oh, i'l watch him barking and woofing, alright. Jamie wouldn't let that go, EVER. At the same time I feel like Roy would refuse to imitate barking & they would let him just bc that's Roy. A simple "fuck you" and that's ok.

The difference in body language, wow. Love hounds though? Nate, you need to get back with Ted then. Gosh, this entire storyline is SO awkward.

I think I'm still in love with her a little bit. What a woman.

#natiswatching #ted lasso #roy x jamie #rebecca welton #trent crimm #keeley x jack #jamie tartt

[nagisagwa]

— waking up beside them

just some instances where they have some time off for once and start their day off in the best way possible — with you

INCLUDES : eichi ; nagisa ; nazuna ; rei ; rinne ; souma

A/N : currently crying to eccentric party night!! bc that song never fails to break me ;w; but also yes hi first es work !! i hope u all enjoy this and if u did, reblogs are very much appreciated <33

— eichi

instances where you and he are both awake at the same time are rare, but that’s what makes him cherish them even more; the soft, unfiltered sunlight peeking through and highlighting your features never fails to surface his unbridled adoration for you

when he has to leave before you, the guilt stings. sometimes you awake to a cold bed, and the mere thought of that plagues his mind for the day, and all the following days that accumulate after. but how could he wake you when you look so peaceful? if he were to do that then he truly would never be able to forgive himself. so instead he leaves a small note on the bedside table, giving your cheeks a soft peck or two before he departs with a longing gaze

but when he has the day off, he will gladly stay in bed with you, taking this chance to hold you so close you could probably wake up to his palpitating heart. in times like these he would fondly gaze at you, taking your hands in his and littering soft kisses across its expanse before holding them close to his heart

so when you wake up, hands warm and eichi’s soft features greeting you, don’t be surprised if he holds you in place with him under the covers. the only time you can get up is when he goes down to prepare some tea for the both of you to indulge in

— nagisa

waking up beside nagisa is a light feeling; it’s something soft and fleeting, a layer of warmth settling over you like the arm draped carefully over your body. and yet his embrace around you is protective and all-consuming, a firm hold that keeps you in place, but not to the point you’re unable to move

well, it’s not like you mind — not at all !! in fact, he happens to be a very good cuddler when it comes down to it, his natural warmth lulling you into a deep slumber within seconds, and allowing for a welcome awakening all the same

but it’s not often nagisa gets to enjoy laying in bed during the early hours with you, what with the way his idol work has a tendency to keep him away from you for elongated periods of time. and even when you do see each other during work hours, your mutual agreement of keeping your professional and private lives separate only forces longing glances and aching desire to occur

so when he wakes up, your resting face so close to his warm one, he swears his heart stutters. it’s not long before he brings his arms around your body, repressed affection blooming in the way he gently tugs your body close to him and tucks your head in the crook of his neck

waking up beside nagisa is a light feeling; even more so when you try to get up for some water, only to witness a slight furrow of his brows, a subtle pout settled on his lips, as his arms carefully pull you back down to him

...perhaps staying in a bit longer wouldn’t hurt anyone

— nazuna

mornings with nazuna are soft, spending the sparce time just cuddling and exchanging hushed giggles

he tries his best to be there when you’re awake, but sometimes it’s not all that easy. practice can be demanding, and other projects just can’t have time rearrangements. so when he does find the time to spend them with you, he’ll be sure to not let the moment slip nor take it for granted. after all, mornings like this are precious to him, but so is every moment spent with you

when he’s the first to awake, he’ll find himself admiring you. perhaps a gentle kiss to your nose, or brushing the back of his palm against the apple of your cheek will suffice but, no matter what, he’ll do so in a way that won’t wake you — the guilt would be too much for him if you didn’t get to wake up naturally

in times such as these, however, he would be gazing at you while lost in thought, ideals and prospects for what the future for you both holds steadily filling his mind (though he does catch himself before he can get ahead of himself most of the time)

so when you wake up to nazuna’s unbearably soft gaze and rosy cheeks, you can’t help the giggle that slips out. even when he sputters and flusters more, his unyielding adoration for you triumphs; even when he buries his face into your shoulder in embarrassment

— rei

sleeping in with rei isn’t a rare occurrence. there would be times he would simply guide you into his coffin to take a very (not) much needed nap, holding you close with a content sigh escaping him, and then there would be times like now, where he’s curled around in you bed, curtains drawn so not even a slither of light passes through

he’s a cuddler. a bit clingy, but it’s more so in the way his subconscious thoughts of you not being there when he wakes up prompt him to hold you long into the night. but you don’t mind, not even when the heat starts to become unbearable. if it’s for the sake of rei’s peace of mind, you’ll just sleep through it

typically it’s you who awakes before him, admiring his relaxed features and carding a gentle hand through his hair. but on the off-chance where he awakes before you, he’ll catch himself smiling at your sleeping visage, a careful hand cupping your cheek before peppering tender kisses across the surface of your face. though he would purposefully leave your lips, saving it to greet you a good morning for when you wake up

and when you do, you’re greeted with the blissful sight of rei’s soft smile, honey-dripping eyes the last thing you see before your breath is stolen in a delicate kiss and a light giggle

it’s times like these where rei considers himself lucky to have you; someone who unknowingly lets him know it’s okay to be himself, no matter how trivial the topic at hand may be. and so he makes sure you know how much he appreciates and loves you in these special mornings where it’s only you and him in the world

— rinne

mornings with rinne can be spontaneous (you’ve had a couple rude awakenings from his inexplicable urge to tickle you), but they can also be quiet and loving

waking up to a bed without him isn’t hard. more often than not he’ll always be the first thing you wake up to — whether that’s his resting expression, a cheeky grin with your name lovingly uttered from his lips, or a soft countenance and a light kiss to your forehead — and vice versa

and though rinne tends to avoid outright displaying his true emotions in public, behind the closed doors of your shared room and within close quarters he doesn’t feel the need to put on a facade. after all, you’re someone who can figure out his small habits and changes without a second thought, so who is he to hide from his beloved?

so on the days where he wakes up before you, he takes to admiring your soft features, sometimes raising a hand to brush against the curvatures of your face, and other times he would pull you into his chest, littering light kisses along your face before holding you in a protective embrace.

and through all of these actions, he does so with a lovestruck smile that’s unable to be repressed even if he wanted it to be

— souma

as someone undeniably sincere and wholly devoted to his ideals, souma would continue the unspoken tradition you both established: wait for the other to wake up, or leave a written note if something comes up

while it may not seem like that much to others, souma follows this routine down to a tee. he hates the very notion of you waking up with him nowhere in sight, bed cold and no idea of where he could be — and vice versa. you could be in danger and he wouldn’t have a single clue of your whereabouts (though it may be irrational to some, he worries of your status as his lover, an idol’s lover, and how some may react to that)

often times he would find himself playing with your fingers, bringing them up and placing a small kiss on each one before encasing your hands in his. souma likes holding you close to him, and sometimes he can hear your sleepy mumbles of random nuances, or even hushed declarations of love you hold for him. and it’s at times like those where he can’t stop his love from leaping out, pulling you close and resting his head on your chest to fall asleep to the steady beats of your heart

so when you awake to tufts of violet hair through blurry vision, the soft smile you produce is almost instinct. carding kissed fingers through his untied hair, you feel as though the world has come to a stop, for only you and souma exist in this space, and this space alone

#ensemble stars #enstars #ensemble stars x reader #enstars x reader #eichi tenshouin #eichi tenshouin x reader #nagisa ran #nagisa ran x reader #nazuna nito #nazuna nito x reader #rei sakuma #rei sakuma x reader #rinne amagi #rinne amagi x reader #souma kanzaki #souma kanzaki x reader

[thunderwetter]

What about First Aid?

ALRIGHT! Finally I can continue with these, it's been a while!

So, First Aid, our lovely little pacifist medic, let's see~

TLDR;

- Clear Priorities: Work > Partner > Anyone else > Himself

- Hard time relaxing, mentally always at work

- Goes with the flow, tries to endure unpleasant situations for the sake of his partner as long as possible

- Desire to please, needs reassurance through feedback

- Doesn't like being the center of attention, prefers mutuality

- Super noisy, lots of whines and moans (not a screamer tho)

- Enjoys medical play (be it gentle or mean, he knows what's safe)

- Doesn't enjoy intoxication, but is weak for being hypnotized (rarely indulges though bc he feels bad about it)

Curious about other characters? My ask box is open!

Previous HCs: #thw kinklist

Currently in queue: Tracks, Rumble and Frenzy

Longer version:

First Aid really is one of the sweetest guys in the known universe, not that anyone is surprised to hear it. He has very clear priorities, putting his work first, his partner second and himself behind anyone or anything else. This applies to any situation, making him somewhat difficult to catch off-duty. Mentally, he is always tending to patients, making it hard for him to fully relax.

He is a very generous lover, willing to go with whatever his partner may be into, trying everything at least once before settling on whether he likes it or not. If he dislikes something, he'll be hesitant to let his partner know, he will try to force himself through it if possible, but if he actively feels like his partner's pleasure doesn't weigh up with his personal discomfort, he will attempt to gently guide the interaction into a different direction that makes him feel more comfortable.

First Aid has a strong desire to be acknowledged, not in a kinky way, not from a point of insecurity, but rather in a way of reassurance. He's the type to be very focused on his partner's feedback, paying attention to the way they react to his actions. He'd ask before every touch and take any comment to spark. Reassuring him that he's doing his "job" well, telling him that what he's doing feels good, to keep going, would help him relax in return, even make him feel a little pride.

He'd be reluctant to let anyone service him, but once you have him convinced, his soft-spokenness would leave this bot like a demon being exorcised. He will be NOISY oh boy. He'd try to hide it out of embarrassment, but there's pretty much no hope for him once he really lets go of himself. It would start out with sighs and hums, those would turn into whines and by the end of it, he'd be a moaning mess. He wouldn't be deafening loud, but definitely clearly audible. Still, he doesn't like how greedy service feels to him and prefers to at least have mutual stimulation, be it via Sixty-nine or classic interface.

First Aid really doesn't make many demands and goes with the flow, but that doesn't mean he doesn't have any kinks himself. He isn't likely to request it, but there's definitely some excitement when he's asked for medical play. First Aid loves his job dearly and making it part of interface brings him a lot of joy. Ask him to be gentle, ask him to be devious, he knows exactly which cables to pull, which ones to caress, which ones would make your leg jerk and which ones would kill you on the spot. And whatever one asks him to do - he'd be having the time of his life. I honestly can see him having so much fun that he forgets about interface altogether, he'd absolutely get carried away.

First Aid would avoid intoxication (in general) and intoxicated interface. He's not that much into getting high or drunk in general and even less he's into it when his partner is wasted. He's a firm believer that stimulating substances are not necessary for relaxation or pleasure and that anything can be achieved by just making the right move at the right moment.

It would be fine for him to try hypnosis with a trusted mech though, mostly because it doesn't require any consumption of drugs, but also because he knows he's too tense and that he needs some relief. It would work like a charm on him, but afterwards he'd feel guilty for being the one being pleasured and not being able to reciprocate properly, so hypnosis would be more of a rare indulgence.

That's all I got for now, once again sorry for taking ages with this, at least I got my assignment done in time and can now resume to the horny :]

#valveplug #valveplug headcanons #ask thunderwave #thunderwave tf verse #thw kinklist #first aid

[blushinggray]

change of plans: part 12 [final]

sero hanta x fem!reader

part 12/12 (part 11 | part 1)

cw // fluff. sappy, sugary, cavity-inducing fluff. slight angst, self reflection, implied sexual content. and last warning: fluff

a/n: finally at the finish line, folks!! tysm for sticking with me to the end and being so patient for this last part. i hope you enjoy it so very much. also watch out, bc this last part is about 17k

—

Hanta believes in love. He always has.

He's seen it in his family, his friends, in the movies, TV shows, photographs, books, everywhere. He'd say he's even been in love himself before. It was a wild and exciting adolescence, and they eventually grew out of each other, but it was real.

And because Hanta knows that it can be real, he knows that it's perfectly fine to take his time. He's a romantic at heart, but there's nothing wrong with having a good time.

If he’s learned anything from his family’s and friends’ relationships, and all the telenovelas his cousins made him watch in the past, it’s that it’s perfectly natural to take time to build a connection. As well for a little drama to crop up in the process.

So that's why he spends the first half of his college years playing the field, seeing what kind of style of love or partner he likes, building skill and experience.

It's not that he's afraid of commitment, despite what his reputation or body count might imply. It's more like... he hasn't really found anyone he's truly interested in yet.

Yeah, he's connected with plenty of people, charmed his way into the graces of many a pretty face, and he's diligent about his partners' pleasure — he never lets them leave with just one orgasm, if he can help it. And there have been a few that he comes back to once or twice.

But still, he rarely comes across someone who makes him think, "they could be the one."

Someone who could make him feel that beautiful thing he's seen shared in a tender kiss, or a soft hug in the kitchen, or worn hands kneading tortilla dough together, or a conversation over morning coffee.

That's not to say he hasn't tried before, because he has. He has plenty of tricks he's learned over the years from his family and friends all over the world to woo someone and give them a few more butterflies.

But it's not just about that. He has to feel it; that connection, that desire, that passion. It has to be real, and mutual.

And he's sure that when the person comes, he'll just know.

When he meets you for the first time, he barely has a clue.

He's at a live karaoke bar with friends. Usually there are always some drunk college kids who are willing to step up to the mic and entertain or annoy the room, but it's actually pretty dead that night.

Hanta's mainly here because Denki brought him to hang out with his other friends in the psych department. He's met Monoma and Tokage before, but there were a few new faces he was getting to know tonight, namely Shinsou and Honenuki — both of whom resembled zombies in laughably different ways.

In Shinsou's case, it was the dark circles that would make you think he had already died once. Probably because he's already working his ass off to get into the school's graduate program.

For Honenuki though, he just had a really sharp facial structure, like his skin was thinner than most people's so it'd make every bone in his face stand out. Hanta's always had big teeth and a wide smile himself, but he swears he could practically see Honenuki's molars when the guy smiled.

They were all cool though, and they knew a bunch of people around, so Hanta's introduced to even more new faces throughout the night. Many of whom are very pretty, he might add.

When he's spoiled for choice, he tries to take his time to see who's interested in some conversation first. Not that he's opposed to a dirty fuck in the bathroom every once in a while, but the night is still young.

So far, his attention's been taken up by this cute brunette twink with a small waist and perky ass. He's got a bunch of piercings in his ears and one on his septum. And he had "let slip" that his nipples are done too, which Hanta is always a fan of.

They're all having a good time, taking shots, getting drinks, cheering on whoever's willing to get up to the slightly raised, circular stage in the middle of the bar and grab the mic.

Hanta's got his arm around the cute brunette's waist — whose name is Riki, he's learned — a while later, helping hold him up since he's apparently a lightweight and already had two drinks. And with the way Riki's clinging onto him, Hanta's fairly sure he'll get to see those nipple piercings for himself later tonight.

Some point in the night, Denki is complaining about how no one's given a decent performance on stage so far, "Like, how come none of the acapella girls are out tonight? They love this place!"

"There's an acapella group at our school?" Shinsou asks.

"Yeah, but they're like, not an official school club or anything." Denki waves his hand, "They just sing together out in the quad or something. There's no big competitions to try out for like in 'Pitch Perfect.'"

"Oh yeah, I've seen them singing together out in the grass sometimes, too." Riki says, "I heard they're actually just friends from one of the local church choirs."

"Yeah, they are." Honenuki confirms, "I'm friends with a few of them, and they're pretty good. They post videos of them singing online sometimes that do pretty well."

“Sero’s pretty friendly with a few of them too, aren’t you?” Denki shoots a look over at Hanta, like a little shit.

Does he not see this cute boy hanging off of him right now?

“You should call them up and invite ‘em out here!” Denki suggests.

“Shut up, dude.” Hanta shakes his head, rolling his eyes, “I’m not that close with them. I don’t even think I have their numbers saved.”

He does. But calling up girls that he’s only ever slept with before when he might be sleeping with someone else tonight would not be the move.

"Honenuki, you should call them to come out then!" Denki moves on quickly, "This place is so dead tonight, we needa liven it up a bit."

"I mean, I can ask, but there's no guarantee that they'll come." Honenuki shrugs, but takes out his phone anyway.

It was a long shot, but by some miracle, one of his friends responds and apparently she's already out on the town at another bar with some of her own friends. So she said she'd hop over here since they were figuring out their next stop anyway.

And when a new group of about five girls show up to the bar, Honenuki waves you over. Hanta doesn’t recognize you or any of the friends you’ve brought along, which is a relief to him.

You lead your group over and get everybody introduced, though you and Denki already seem to know each other.

"We had a communications class together in freshman year." Denki explains.

"Your presentations were always hilarious." You chuckle at him, "You were definitely high during most of them."

"Oh shit, that obvious?" Denki laughs with you for a bit until eventually, he says, "But I didn't know you were part of the acapella group!"

"I'm not part of the church choir that most of the girls are in, but I'm friends with most of them. So they just let me join in whenever they're doing a singing circle or whatever." You shrug. "I'm definitely not nearly as good as any of them though."

"Oh, come on. You're good." Honenuki says, nudging you with an elbow. "That's why they keep inviting you to join them."

You hum with a cheeky smile before you nudge him back, "Well, you said it, not me."

"You should sing something tonight." Honenuki suggests, offering you the weed pen he’s been smoking from, "It'd really liven up the place."

"Yeah? You need me to wave around my karaoke mic like a magic wand to save your night?" You joke, still smiling even as you take the vape.

Honenuki meets your smile halfway, suddenly creating something more electric in the room.

And he says, "What? You didn't come here to save my night?"

“Okay.” You break into a small snort as you shift your body towards him as you bring the vape pen up to your mouth, creating a soft tension that Hanta can't look away from. "And what do I get for singing a little song for you?"

At that, Honenuki gives you a small shrug before leaning in to whisper something into your ear while you're slowly inhaling from the mouthpiece. And when he pulls back, the two of you watch each other as you blow out the thin smoke.

There's a special kind of tension there that slows everything down around you, and Hanta can't help but watch and appreciate it, kind of wishing he had something like that for himself.

"You know ‘Fierce Wings’?" You eventually ask, breaking the long, sticky gaze with Honenuki.

"By Hawks? Yeah." Honenuki answers.

"You start, then. I'll sing backup." You say as you take another long puff before returning the pen to him, then beckoning for him to follow you up to the song selection tablet placed beside the stage.

That's how Honenuki gets wrangled into taking the stage as the main vocalist of the song you end up choosing. You really do just take up the supporting role of the song, harmonizing with him and singing the background lyrics in the chorus until you trick everyone into thinking Honenuki is the star of the performance.

Hanta really doesn't know what to make of the whole thing, but the bar and the stage do end up getting livelier after that. There are cheers and suddenly other people are queueing up songs, and Hanta vaguely recalls you taking the stage again with your friends at some point.

He ends up a little preoccupied with Riki's cute, heart-shaped nipple rings to remember much else about that night, but the effect of your presence doesn’t leave him or his memory.

—

He does remember you the next time he sees you at a party.

Denki's the one who greets you and reintroduces Hanta to you, though you only give him a polite smile and greeting before starting a conversation somewhere else. He doesn't think much of it until he sees you jamming out in the living room with a few of your friends, like something out of a coming-of-age movie.

And that’s probably the first time he lets himself take a good look at you, long enough to realize how pretty you are.

Maybe he was a little too preoccupied to realize it last time, but it’s pretty hard not to notice a smile like that. Especially when you put a little playfulness into it.

Hanta doesn’t get to see it for himself a lot. Every time he runs into you at a party after that, he only ever catches that pretty smile when you’re laughing at someone else’s jokes, or singing and dancing along to a song that’s playing, or cackling drunkly with your friends, or maybe even flirting with someone else.

And he can tell when you’re flirting with someone.

You’ll have that smile on your face, but suddenly the air around you will just thicken and fill up with that same tension he felt around you that first night at the karaoke bar. Tension that Hanta can sense even from across the room or through a window or from the balcony he’s (unintentionally) watching from.

You flirt in a way that makes him feel like he’s wading through honey just from watching you.

It’s not long before he starts to wonder if he can get a taste of it for himself. And to his credit, he gives it an honest try. Comes up to you and tries to start a longer conversation or make a flirty joke, but you never give him the opening for long.

After a while of assuming it’s just bad timing on his part, Hanta starts to realize that your excuses are very much intentional.

“Oh hey! That’s my friend over there, I’m gonna go catch up with them. Nice talking to you, Sero.”

“Sorry, I wasn’t planning on staying long tonight. Got an exam coming up.”

“I was actually on my way to the bathroom. If you’ll excuse me.”

“Ugh. You are too much.” You had just straight up rolled your eyes at him once and left (after an admittedly cheesy line), ��Catch ya later.”

While you never fail to escape him, he doesn’t get the sense that you’re uninterested in him. He has a feeling that if you really wanted nothing to do with him, you’d let him know.

Because he’s seen it. Those short tickles of tension that fill the space between you when your eyes meet for a little too long. A short few seconds where you let your guard down and enjoy yourself in front of him.

Something’s there. If he could just extend those seconds for a little longer…

“Are you ever going to stop making those dumb, googly eyes and actually, you know, talk to her?” Mina breaks him out of his thoughts one night, when they’re all just kicking back at Denki’s place.

In all honesty, Hanta wasn’t even sure if he wanted to come tonight, but when his friend eventually dropped your name among the others that were coming, he couldn’t stop his own sudden change of heart.

Not that his chances with you will improve any more than he’s tried so far, but it doesn’t stop him from showing up and staring (apparently obviously) from his corner of the room anyway.

“I’ve talked to her,” Hanta defends himself, taking a gulp of the vodka and orange he mixed himself before he shrugs, “She just doesn’t wanna talk to me.”

“What? Why not?” Mina asks.

“Probably because he’s already slept with a few of her friends.” Denki snorts, finishing up his own drinks on the counter.

He hands one of them to Mina, who takes it with a hum, “That checks out.”

“Hey! How is that my fault?” Hanta defends again, “I met them all on different occasions. And it was always mutually casual.”

“Okay, whatever.” Mina rolls her eyes before taking a sip of the poison Denki mixed her before almost choking on it.

“Well, cut him some slack.” Denki shrugs, “He definitely hasn’t made those googly eyes at any of her friends so far. Honestly the first time I’ve seen Hanta simp like this since high school.”

“I am not simping.” Hanta groans, “I’m just interested in her. That’s all.”

He wants to feel how dense the air gets when you turn that playful smile at him. Maybe take a bath in it if you let him. He just has yet to convince you that it’d be worth your while.

But Denki might have a point. If Hanta’s reputation precedes him, then that would explain why you barely ever spare him more than a few minutes of your time.

"Well, I think you guys would be cute together, so I am totally onboard with this little crush." Mina smiles widely, clearly eager to start meddling. She’s already turning over to Denki to ask, “Do you still have that Jenga set that we wrote on?”

By some miracle of Mina’s making, about an hour later, he’s sitting in a circle with you and the others, looking down at your pretty eyes as he spits a shot of jaeger into your open, waiting mouth. He’s almost immediately at half mast as you look up at him while you take all of his alcohol and spit.

And not too long after that, he’s nursing his poor semi with the sound of your drunken giggles in the kitchen, taking up your space, absolutely relishing the feeling of you finally flirting back.

He savors every smile, returns every comment, and takes every opening that leads him to the taste of your lips.

Because once he finally does get to press his lips into yours, with a mouthful of orange juice no less, he gets it.

He finally gets what he was missing, what he’s been wanting to know this whole time.

What it feels like to be caught up in your eyes and honey web aura, and to enjoy capture.

When you sigh like that and wrap your arms and legs around him after he places you on the edge of the sink, Hanta thinks that maybe he enjoys being caged after all.

If you wanted to keep him anchored to you with this dense, hot-wired, yet giddy feeling you bring out of him, he can’t say that he’d mind.

Just when he starts to think he’s going to have the best night of his life, however, he’s interrupted.

Then pushed away.

Then stumped as you pull a move that Hanta did not expect.

You look like you just had to snap yourself out of a bad dream when you turn on the sink and splash the adorably dazed look you had right off your face.

He has no idea what’s going on, but suddenly you’re apologizing and leaving the kickback like you hadn’t just weaved bits of Hanta’s soul into some new, puzzling shape.

Maybe it was a good thing that Mina and Toru accidentally interrupted, as much as his dick wants to say otherwise. Hanta finds it dizzying to settle back into reality after that kiss. It’s like the two of you had built up your own little world around him before you suddenly broke it right back down.

Hanta can't seem to get the taste of you out of his mind even when he washes it out of his mouth with more drinks.

Mina keeps trying to convince him that there's still hope, but the way you broke out of his arms and ran for the door was as clear as rejection could be. As much fun as you seemed to be having with him tonight, there is clearly something holding you back.

Ironically, Hanta is more fired up than ever to try and close the distance now that he knows how you flirt and taste firsthand.

He’s finally in your peripheral. He just has to find a way to stay there.

—

He hadn't expected to see you again so soon, let alone have one of the nicest meals he's had with a new companion in a while.

According to Magne-san, he was just all smiles throughout lunch, which she made sure to tease him for while he paid the bill.

Which, fine, yeah he was playing up the humor and smooth talk a little more than usual, since he saw you react so well to that when you were flirting with other guys before.

But it didn't seem to have the same effect on you when he did it, which kind of sucks.

He thought he was doing pretty well with the banter, though he was caught off guard a few times when you genuinely made him laugh.

Even when you’ve got your guard up around him, you’re still rather pleasant to talk to. Or at least, you bounce off of Hanta’s playfulness pretty easily. He finds himself wishing for lunch to last just a while longer, so he can keep rallying with you, convince you to lower your walls just a little more.

But by the time he and you part ways at the station, it still doesn't feel like he's changed your impression of him. He didn't even get your number, or any kind of real promise to see you again.

He did manage to sneak a photo of you.

While he told you he deleted it, he sent it to Mina first to archive it. It was just so cute. When he gets home and settles down in his room, it's the first thing he pulls up to stare at for a while.

Your cute, concentrated face being stuffed with noodles as you genuinely enjoy the food at one of his favorite places. It's so casual and natural that he could probably convince himself that this is a date picture.

He saves it to his favorites and tries not to think about your pretty face and sarcastic humor for the rest of the week.

—

Running into you at Jirou's place is an actual coincidence. Mina and Toru hadn't mentioned anything about this hangout to him since it was probably a girls' thing in the first place, but Denki wanted to crash the party when Hanta mentioned he was going to drop by to give Jirou her edited photos.

It was coincidence, but... when you don't choose to sit away from him, he can't help but get close.

And then, when you start to run your fingers through his hair, he can't help but melt against you.

Once you start singing in perfect harmony with Yaomomo, casually revealing that you know French, he can't help but just stare up at you in awe.

And then, when you start talking about some French guy named Aoyama, telling stories about him that put a cheery laugh on your pretty face, Hanta can't help but feel a light pain in his chest. As well as the irritable burn of jealousy flaring up.

"Hey, c'mere." He brings your attention back to him when he receives the blunt again.

He doesn't know what possesses him to do it, to kiss you in front of everyone unprompted, but he does it.

The jealousy is one thing, but the nerve to bring you down to shotgun a breath of smoke into your mouth as an excuse to get your mind off of this super funny French dude you're talking about is... Well, it's certainly a surprise to him.

What's even more of a surprise, though, is that you give him that cheeky look of yours and return the favor, snatching the blunt out of his hand to blow a fresh breath of smoke right back into his mouth.

Hanta tries not to kiss back too eagerly, despite the fact that he's got his hand on the back of your neck to keep you down here with him. But he's predictably interrupted again when Mina demands to know what is happening.

Honestly, he’d like to know himself. But you play it off before he can flirt his way into a more promising answer.

He plays it cool for the next few hours as you try to get your space from him, but frankly, after you kissed him back like that, it's a lost cause trying to keep his mind off of you.

All he wants to do is kiss you again.

He has to kiss you again.

So he does.

When you leave for the night, he chases after you and gets a proper taste of your mouth again before you start hypnotizing him with that honey-thick tension you create with your eyes. Your body is so soft, and your voice so sweet as you make little whining noises against him.

So fucking cute.

He can't remember the last time he's felt like this from just kissing someone. His hands are cupping your face, but his body is going crazy. Just the satisfaction of you finally reciprocating his surprisingly profound desire for you has him bricked up.

Because you do want him.

Despite how you've been trying to keep your distance, you want him too. He can tell, from the way you just kiss him like you're planting seeds of your soul to root into his heart.

Which is why he's that much more thrown off when you push him away again.

How can you kiss him like that and still want to go home alone?

He won't lie. He's a little disheartened.

And confused.

You left him your number this time but if things are just going to keep going like this, then he isn’t sure what to think.

While he can handle the slight blueballing, he doesn’t know how to read all of your mixed signals.

You kiss him like you want him.

But then you insist that you don’t.

He calls you that same night in some desperate attempt to get some reassurance, only to be shut down. Though he was faded by that point, so he can’t remember if he had the best approach or not.

From the sound of your voice, you actually sound rather annoyed, so now he’s even more dejected.

So he figures maybe it’s a sign that he shouldn’t keep pushing.

—

He mutes your notifications on purpose, to keep himself from jumping to text you back the very moment you send him a message. To play it cool. To not push you further away than his reputation seems to have already done for him.

Hanta keeps busy as usual, preoccupying himself with school, his friends, work, photography, spontaneous outings, stupid behavior, all his usual things.

Well, maybe not all his usual things.

He's been turning down a lot of invitations to hang out with people he'd usually end up naked with.

All the flirty banter, the pretty faces, the killer bodies, and the casual fun Hanta would indulge in don't appeal to him as much as they did before.

Or, maybe it's more accurate to say that someone else appeals to him way more.

He still appreciates a cute face or a flirty interaction every here and there, but nothing hits the same as your pretty face after you come up from a kiss. Which is something he ends up replaying in his mind at some point every day.

Even when he keeps himself busy, or smokes his thoughts away, or keeps his phone out of reach for most of the day, or even tries to flirt around with someone else, his thoughts always go back to you when he’s in bed at night. There’s no way to stop them from taking over his mind once he’s alone, forced to sit with his own thoughts.

It’s pretty bad.

And sometimes, when he ends up dreaming about you, he'll wake up with an almost painful hard-on that he has no choice but to relieve himself from. It's not like he's getting any other action these days.

If whatever wet, humid dream he was having escapes him before he can finish, he just imagines you himself.

He'll start simple, with an easy stroke as he recalls actual memories of your dazed eyes and cute pout after he kissed you. The softness of your lips and body. The sweet scent that lingered off of your skin when he leaned in close enough.

Then by the time he’s full-on fantasizing about you naked in countless positions he’d never repeat aloud to anyone, he’ll make a fucking mess of himself. Sometimes his dick doesn’t even die down with the first one, so he’ll do it again.

Pathetic as it is, he kind of sees it as image training. Hopefully for when he does eventually get the chance to feel you against his body for real.

He can't be sure when that'll ever be, but it's just how he makes do for now.

When Hanta catches sight of you by chance in the student center, a good three weeks or so since he last saw you in person, he ditches whoever he’s with at the time and scurries over to you without a second thought. Like a moth to a flame.

And while he thinks all’s going well at first — your eyes won’t stop darting towards his new lip piercing that he got on the fly last week — you���re quick to pull away. And then even jump ship when you start jabbering away in French with a pretty blonde twink who appears out of nowhere. (He really is pretty, though his style’s a bit gaudy for Hanta’s taste.)

It really hits him then when your mood takes a complete 180 once this Aoyama guy shows up. All the muted caution and slight grumpiness you had given Hanta had all but melted away as you made contact with your friend.

And while Hanta is fairly sure that you’re not into Aoyama that way (now that he’s met the guy for himself), that doesn’t mean that his chance with you has improved at all.

That’s when he realizes maybe he fucked up a bit.

Because he likes you. He wants a chance with you.

And he’s spent the last couple of weeks flubbing his opportunities to talk to you, trying to play it cool when in actuality, he only wants to get to know you more.

He wants to have more meals and longer talks with you. He wants to know more about the things you do, know, and like. He wants you to have that cheerful, happy look on your face that you gave Aoyama when you look at him.

He wants that.

He realizes that now, stupid as he is. But it’s clear by the guarded, huffy way you talk to him that he is nowhere near your good graces right now.

But fuck, he’d do anything to find his way back. He tries, in a last desperate attempt, to see you again. In a group setting, just to be safe. But the way you say goodbye to him tells him that he shouldn’t get his hopes up.

—

Hanta can tell something has changed by the time he has sex with you for the first time.

He kind of just lets himself daydream about you without restriction now, which is honestly freeing.

Unfortunately, his texting relationship with you doesn’t seem like it can be salvaged anymore, but he still feels so much better now that he’s realized how he actually feels about you.

While he’s silently becoming more and more obsessed with you, he kind of just loses his sense of shame or embarrassment every time his friends try to tease him about you.

When Denki told him that you texted him about the kickback, Hanta didn’t even hide his wide-eyed shock or anticipation. Denki and the others who were there at the time laughed at him at first, but quickly switched gears when they realized he was being serious.

“Shut up, you guys. Don’t mess this up for me.” He had pleaded, “I really think I like her. But she seemed kinda pissed at me recently, so I really don’t need any more reasons for her to hate me.”

“What? Hanta, come on, she doesn’t hate you.” Mina insisted, “If anything, she probably hates that she likes you.”

“That’s the thing. I don’t want her to hate that she likes me. I want her to want to like me.” Hanta said.

“Wait, what?” Eijirou blinked, not following, “If she likes him back, then why would she hate liking him? Or wait— did you mean that she hates and likes him? Or that she hates— Wait, what—”

“Thank you, sweetie. Shut up, now.” Mina patted their friend’s head before getting back to the matter at hand, “[Name]’s probably just being careful, okay? Last time she dated a guy like Hanta, it didn’t end well for her.”

“Who’d she go out with?” Denki asked.

“This guy named Kaibara, from the engineering department.” Mina answered, “Super pretty boy. Fuckboy Supreme, honestly.”

“Oh shit, Kaibara Sen?” Denki sat up in surprise, “Dude, he is hot. I mean, not within the engineering department, but you know their building is right next to humanities, right? So all the girls there are always lingering around engineering for him. Guy’s got bitches lined up.”

“Yeah, okay, whatever.” Hanta interrupted, “Who gives a shit about him? I need to prove that I’m not him so that she’ll stop avoiding me.”

“Wow, you’re really serious about this, huh?” Eijirou awed, “You must really like her, bro.”

“And what about it?” He pouted back, hiding behind a blunt.

“Alright, everyone shut up!” Mina clapped her hands to demand everyone’s attention, “We all have to be on top of this if Hanta’s gonna get his proper one-on-one time to win [Name] over. So come Saturday, no one is allowed to hoard more than five minutes with her at a time!”

“What if Hanta’s with her in a communal area?” Shouto asked.

“Unless Hanta is with her in a communal area!” Mina revised, making Hanta groan in exasperation.

He loves his friends but they can be so damn dramatic.

Still, he appreciates their support. He probably wouldn’t have had the chance to get to know you better in the first place if it weren’t in part for their meddling.

And despite how he knows he’s going to have to endure a lot more teasing and jokes at his expense from them, he already knows that just a kiss from you is worth all of it.

Because he’s kissed you enough times to know that each one changes the chemical balance in his brain a little more. That he’s gonna develop an addiction to you soon enough.

When you show up that evening wearing the greatest hoodie he’s ever seen from the HR franchise, the nerves in his hands dance with the need to immortalize this sight. He just has to keep this image of you in Cellophane colors forever.

When you look up at him after he’s cornered you in the kitchen, he feels that chemical change snap inside of him, charging up for a strike as you ask, “So what do I get in return for being your pretty little subject?”

Just like that first night he watched you talk to Honenuki.

When you break away from his gluttonous, desperate kiss to say, “Take me to the roof,” he feels his blood crackle beneath his skin, about to flare up in a fire from the inside.

Your body feels like heaven, and your face when you come is just… meant to be captured in a painting or something. Everything about you has him sighing in bliss or staring in awe or kissing in desperation.

He can’t stop kissing you.

It just feels too good, tastes like his own personal nectar.

He feels like he’ll die if he doesn’t find out what your pussy tastes like, too.

It all feels like it passes far too quickly, despite his thorough intent to take his time with you. He would fuck you out here on this rooftop until the sun came up if you’d let him, and it still wouldn’t feel like enough time. There are just so many things — so many things — he still needs to learn about you.

Like if you sound like this every time you come close, or if you make different noises based on how long he’s had to tease you.

Or if you’re sensitive in any spots that he can’t reach while you’re both trapped in your pants around your thighs.

How do you look when you’re completely naked?

What other position do you like? What’s your favorite one?

Do you want to do it with him?

Because he wants to do it with you.

Everything.

He wants you in every which way you can possibly think of.

Until you can’t think anymore.

It’s one of the best nights of his life. Which is kind of bittersweet because Hanta isn’t sure if you’ll let it happen again. Despite how amicably you returned to the apartment together, you don’t show any signs that you’ve changed your mind about him.

He's flying so high that he almost resigns himself to making do with the (absolutely perfect) pictures of you in the Cellophane hoodie for the rest of his life, thinking that he's probably already gotten the most of what you’ll allow him.

But when the opportunity comes pouring down on him from the sky, he seizes it.

Next thing he knows, you’re dripping, screaming, and laughing with him under a rainstorm as he all but drags you into his room.

And when you follow him inside without protest, let him eat your pussy in the shower, and start singing and dancing around in his bedroom without a second thought about anything else, he knows he never would’ve made do with a few pictures.

His fantasies could never keep up with you.

—

When you start coming over more, Hanta can feel love in the air.

It surrounds him, envelops him in this warm, satisfying feeling whenever you smile at him, or laugh at a dumb joke he makes, or look at him after he kisses you.

God, he loves that look on your face after he kisses you. So cute, so dazed, a little flustered, a little shy, and so unfairly pretty. He really does have to fight himself from pulling out the camera every single time that you make such a cute face at him. 

It feels so natural to be with you, even if he has to fight for it a bit first.

You always act exasperated when you see him and he invites you over, but Hanta can always tell when you secretly want to say yes. All he has to do is wait around, maybe pester you a bit more until you agree to join him.

But he always tries to make it worth your while. 

Hanta usually likes to put an album on and share a joint with you before — or even while — he enjoys a little romp with you in the sheets, or the desk, or the hammock, or the floor.

He’s not picky, and neither are you.

He has to say though, you really are becoming quite the addiction for him.

Because he’s learned that nothing pairs better with a joint than the sight of you fucked out, or lazing around in his room wearing one of his shirts. Especially when you’re just a little bit loopy after a few hits and you let your defenses down a little more.

Sometimes you sing or dance along to the album playing, sometimes you pose a little more freely for his camera, sometimes you sit in his lap without prompt, just purring for him to give you attention like a cute, little kitten. 

Once — after smoking a new strain Hanta was trying — you had just… looked at him from your spot lying on his bed, beckoning him over from his desk with a finger and your irresistible eyes. And then you proceeded to ride him for, legit, ten minutes.

He was helpless underneath you, just watching you grind against him as he smoked away the rest of the joint — for both his and your own good. 

But another time, he's just lying with you side by side, listening to an earlier album by an artist you both like. Sometimes he would talk with you about the music you listened to together, but today, you're just singing along gently, in tune with every word and harmony. Or usually, melody, depending on your mood.

"You are so good at that." He says after a song fades out, "At harmonizing, I mean. I forget that you're an honorary acapella girl sometimes."

"It's not that hard once you get your ear used to it." You say, "I don't sing nearly as much as all of the other girls though, so they're at a completely different level than me."

"Still," he insists, tucking his arm beneath his head as he turns his body towards you, "It's beautiful. I feel like I'm listening to a whole new song."

"It does feel like that sometimes, doesn't it?" You smile as you reach over to take the lyric booklet out of the album cover. Turning over to a certain page, you scoot closer to him as you hold the booklet up between you to read, "Why don't you try it with me?"

Hanta lets out a snort of a chuckle, "I'm not much of a singer."

"Well, it's not really about singing. It's about hearing another rendition of the song." You encourage him lightly, "It's fine, I'll give you the easy part. You just sing along to the tune that you already know."

So he does.

For the first half of the next track in the album, he reads along the lyrics from the booklet and sings it as normal, with you doing some simple harmony at the ends of certain lyrics.

But by the second half, you start vocalizing to another layer of the singer's voice that he had never actually noticed before.

Then, when he's on the last chorus, you sing along to completely different background lyrics that he hadn't even realized were echoing behind the song before.

And yet, the lyrics are all there, in parentheses printed on the booklet alongside the lyrics he's been singing and hearing all this time.

And it sounds... totally different. Amplified, layered, dynamic. Even in his regular old voice.

You somehow open up new facets to a song he’s listened to for years, simply by mixing your voice with his own.

It resonates that much more with the vision of your pretty face just a head tilt away as you lie close beside him, briefly meeting his eyes as you sing the last part in harmony with him.

It actually throws him off a bit and he messes up a few of the lines before getting back on track with you to finish the song. At which point, he kind of just turns over to stare at you, wide-eyed and awestruck.

While he's fumbling for words to say, you just smile at him with a cute, cheeky "toldja!" kind of expression before rolling back towards your side of the bed. And you flip through the lyric booklet as if you didn't just shake up his soul like a can of soda.

That ease with which you switch between angel and siren mode gives him a bit of whiplash.

Sometimes he wonders how exactly you condense and transform the atmosphere around you to share such an ethereal moment with him. It’s just so beautiful, a moment that he wants to capture so badly because he just knows it can’t be replicated.

It reminds him of all those snapshots and glimpses of love he’s seen over the years, that gave him such faith in its existence in the first place.

But right now, here with you, he thinks maybe he’s found his own special rendition of it.

Something meant only for the two of you to see.

—

He starts calling you querida. Something he’s never called anyone before, despite his ample use of Spanish love talk in the past.

Other pet names are easy to throw out to anyone; bella, linda, mami. But somehow querida only fits you.

It’s something he would hear his uncles call his aunties. His really cheesy tíos who loved their wives a little too much in front of the family. But the affection was bold and true in the way they spoke to them, and Hanta can kind of understand the appeal of the term now.

Because it doesn't feel exaggerated when he uses it for you.

It feels right having you around, whether you’re pressed against his skin or covered in his clothes. He enjoys every minute of it; bantering over nothing, fucking without cause, laughing at something silly. Even having your scent soaked in his sheets puts him to sleep easier.

But you never stay for long, to his disappointment.

He usually offers to make you dinner or invite you to stay the night, but he only ever gets as far as watching a movie or a show with you before things get down and dirty.

He doesn't push it since he figures that's what you're comfortable with, but he can't say that it doesn't leave his room feeling lonelier at times. Because it's just so much easier to imagine you filling up his room with your presence now that you’ve been here.

Even though his room hasn't actually changed, it somehow feels more vibrant when you've left traces of yourself for him to find afterwards.

Your shampoo in his pillow.

A lip stain on an emptied mug.

A misplaced CD.

A few stray hairs.

A new song playing in his head.

Some new French phrase you taught him scribbled on a sticky note.

Polaroids in his desk.

Photos in in his memory card.

So many gorgeous photos.

Sometimes he takes a little extra time to "edit" the photos he took just to look at them for a while longer. He doesn't really realize how pathetic that is until maybe the third time Shouto walks into his room and sees your face on his computer monitor and asks, genuinely, "Wouldn't it just be easier to set it as your wallpaper or something?"

And he pitifully answers with, "But then I'd have to choose only one."

Completely serious.

If it were anyone other than Shouto, Hanta knows he would've been laughed out of his own room. But he's spared from the embarrassment when his blessedly indifferent roommate just responds with a calm, "I see." before leaving him be.

But Shouto being the secret little shit he is, waits until everyone's gathered together to watch a MMA fight to put him on blast.

"So how're things going with you and [Surname]?" Eijirou brings up during a commercial break.

"Good, I think." Hanta shrugs, "I mean, we're still kind of casual right now though."

"Seriously?" Denki asks, "Would've thought you'd have dropped to your knees and begged her to be your wife by now."

"Shut up, dude." Hanta scoffs, hiding his actual embarrassment behind a laugh.

"Bro, I can't. You make it too easy." Denki chortles, "You've literally had hearts in your eyes whenever you've talked to her for the past few months."

"The fuck I do!"

"You should see his face when he's staring at her pictures on his computer." Shouto chimes in, casually sipping from his drink.

"Wait, what? You have pictures of her on your computer?"

"That you stare at?"

"In your own free time?"

Hanta shakes his head in exasperation when the room breaks out into cackles and and horrid impressions of Hanta talking to and making out with hypothetical photos of you.

"Dude, what the fuck?" He directs at Shouto, who only shrugs and continues to sip at his drink.

Luckily, the match comes back on soon after that, so everyone's attention is mercifully diverted back to the TV for now.

But not Hanta's, because as the match is starting to heat up, his phone starts vibrating in his pocket somewhere, and he just about has a heart attack when he sees your name on the screen.

Without a word to the others, he jumps out of his chair to run out of the room to the balcony before anyone can sniff out what's going on.

Once he’s outside, he can’t pick up your call fast enough, but he realizes maybe he should’ve taken a breath before letting your voice swim directly into his ear.

"H-Hi..."

Fuck, you are cute as heck, even through one word on the phone.

He keeps his cool as he asks why you're calling, slipping out a flirty joke in the process, "What's up? You missing me already?"

"Shut up." You huff, which Hanta can't help but grin at, effortlessly picturing your rolling eyes. But you follow up with an unexpected, "So... So what if I am?"

Wait.

What the fuck?

Did you really just say that?

To him?

Did you really just admit that you missed him?

Is that why you're calling? Because you missed him and just wanted to talk to him?

Hanta brings his hand up to cover his own mouth and starts pacing along the balcony because holy fuck, holy fuck, holy fuck holyfuck—

He's a little out of his mind as he tries to keep up with the conversation and will down his giant grin, but when you drop in some French out of nowhere, he freezes for a moment, buffering.

Because wait, what did you just say?

Was this something you told him before in passing?

He can't remember.

Is this a test or something?

When he tries to ask you what it means, you retreat quickly, which makes him want to know even more.

So quickly tapping the record function on his phone for the call, he convinces you to say it again. And thankfully, you do. He'll just have to ask Yaomomo to translate it later.

He can hardly wait to find out what made you so shy that you couldn't tell him directly.

But that's not all you leave him with. Something you say catches his attention, and leaves him buffering again.

"Tough as it is trying to figure out what you're really thinking all the time, it's not as hard to guess when you're gonna point a camera at me anymore." you remark offhandedly.

He blinks out into the city scape, processing, "You can't tell what I'm thinking most of the time?"

"How could I? You're so unserious. I can never really tell if you're trying to have an actual conversation or if you're just setting me up for a line."

And that's... well, what can he say to that?

You eventually hang up, leaving him in a daze as he ponders over what you said.

Because playful as he is, he's still been real with you.

He has, hasn't he?

Like yeah, he lays it on a little thick sometimes, but he can't just fake all of those moments he's shared with you.

Plus, the longer he's spent with you, the more he wears his heart on his sleeve.

Surely, you can see some of that, can't you?

"Something going on?" Shouto's voice rings Hanta back into reality before his roommate appears on the balcony beside him.

“Er… well, [Name] just called me.” He admits, looking down at his phone.

“That’s good." Shouto nods, "Right?"

"Well, I thought so. But... It sounds like it wasn’t going exactly as I thought it was.”

“What do you mean?”

He gives Shouto a rundown of his conversation with you, sharing a few tidbits of how his relationship has been going with you lately. Or at least, how he thought it had been going.

“Sounds like your communication styles aren’t lining up.” Shouto says.

“Yeah, well I got that much.” Hanta sighs, leaning against the balcony railing, “But it was hard enough to get her to even talk to me at the beginning. I was trying not to push her too fast, you know?”

“I suppose that’s fair, but you guys have been sleeping together for a few weeks now, haven’t you?” He asks, which doesn’t really sound right to Hanta’s ears.

What he does with you… it’s so much more than just sleeping together (even though that does take up a big part of it).

“Yeah, like… almost two months or something.” He confirms anyway.

“Does she even know that you’re pretty much in love with her?”

“I am not—” Hanta interrupts himself to sigh, knowing that denial would be an outright lie at this point.

With how much he thinks about you, looks forward to seeing you, still wants to know more and more about you all the time, it’s pretty obvious what this is becoming.

“Fuck…" He drags a hand down his face, "How bad is it?”

“It’s not a bad thing. If anything, it’s the opposite. I haven’t seen you this happy before.” Shouto points out, reconfiguring Hanta’s perspective out of nowhere like the genius boy he is.

Hanta sits with the statement for a moment before admitting, rather easily, “She does make me pretty happy, doesn’t she?”

Shouto turns to give him a small smile, saying, “Yeah. It’s nice to see.”

And, well, if being with you is something wholesome enough to get an approving smile out of his reserved, unbothered, but super smart and trusted friend, then that’s probably all the proof that he needs.

You’re someone worth being around.

“Do you make her happy?”

Tires are suddenly scratching in Hanta’s head as Shouto turns the mood up on its head.

He lets out a groan before saying, “Honestly? I thought I was, but after this call… I dunno. It sounds more like I’ve been confusing her.”

“Is there something confusing about a guy who likes you enough to stare at your pictures alone in his room all the time?” Shouto asks, somehow unrhetorically.

“Dude! Come on. Stop making me sound like a creep.”

Shouto shrugs, “I’m just saying, the photos aren’t the ones who need to know how obsessed you are. And I don’t think they’re gonna pass on the message for you, either.”

“Fine! I got it, I got it. I’ll tell her how I feel and all that shit.” Hanta groans, standing up straight and waving off his friend’s calm, yet patronizing look, “Cut me some slack. She makes me kind of stupid.”

“I’m sure she does.”

—

"I miss you. Do you miss me?"

"I miss you. Do you miss me?"

"I miss you. Do you miss me?"

That's what you said, apparently. According to Yaomomo.

Tu me manques. Je te manque?

A gorgeous phrase.

Yaomomo had explained to him that in French, to say 'I miss you' you say it in a way that means, 'you are missing from me.'

"Tu me manques. Je te manque?"

The more Hanta listens to the recording of your call, the deeper he falls into the pit of his own feelings.

You sound so sweet and soft, and then genuinely exasperated with him, like you actually wish you knew how he felt about you. Like all your problems and doubts would be solved if you just knew.

The longer he listens and overanalyzes your voice cues, the more he hears your unspoken plea for reassurance.

But at the same time, Hanta can hear himself, and just how whipped he really is for you.

If this is how he sounds when he talks to you, then it’s no wonder all his friends have been making fun of him. It's almost cringey to listen to how soft and suave he tries to be when he's talking to you. So he also wonders how you somehow can't hear how crazy he is about you.

He ended up asking Yaomomo for suggestions on how to respond, and she was kind enough to even practice with him over video call.

It feels a little silly going this far to practice with a friend just to flirt with you in a language you know, but it's also kind of fun.

Hanta can think of countless things to say in Spanish to you, and they'd all be effortless. But having to work a little to get his message across feels like proof that he really does want to do this. For you.

He doesn't even know how you're going to respond, but he wants to show you that he put a little thought into this. That he did this because you likes you.

More than likes you.

And Shouto has a point. You might not know if he doesn't tell you himself.

So once he's confident that he can say the phrase seamlessly enough, he calls you back, like he's been waiting to do ever since you hung up the first time.

"Hello?" Your voice greets him like a warm hug.

"Hey, beautiful. This is a good time?"

—

The end of the semester is a fucking tornado.

On top of exams, projects, going back and forth with his boss at work to make sure all his shifts are covered while he's gone for the rest of the winter break, planning the trip back to South America, and entertaining all his visiting friends who finished their semesters earlier, Hanta is swamped from morning 'til night.

The only thing that really keeps him going through the days are his texts and calls with you.

To: [Name] 💗 honestly fuck this school shit all i can think about is seeing u again querida

From: [Name] 💗 lol i will not be blamed for your academic failures it's only a few more days

To: [Name] 💗 only???

From: [Name] 💗 you've made it this long, haven't you just a little longer then we can all party through the night

To: [Name] 💗 i only wanna party all night with u ❤️

From: [Name] 💗 i'm sure kaminari and the others would be heartbroken to hear that but i wanna see you soon too

To: [Name] 💗 😩😩😩💞 te adoro 😘 do u have time for a quick call tonight?

Hanta is no longer above embarrassing himself for you. In fact, he's probably lost a bit of control over all the mushy stuff he sends you. He's gotten plenty of eye roll emojis back from you.

But he doesn't care. He's so fucking excited to see you again and finally make his intentions clear.

"Dude, I think you need to take it down a notch. Your phone's gonna start feeling self-conscious."

"What?" Hanta looks up from the push notification (not you) that just appeared on his phone, then realizes that he's been in and out of it all day because he's been doing this the whole time.

So quickly, he pockets his phone and tries to return to attention to his friends, who had driven hours here to visit him.

"My bad, guys."

"Wow, you mentioned this girl a few times, but I didn't realize you were that into her." Koichi, his hometown childhood friend, raises his brows at Hanta. "She must be special."

"Yeah, right. As if someone could wrangle down Hanta's playboy ass." Kazuho, their other hometown friend, comments as she messes around with her suitcase, organizing the entire closet she decided she needed for this short trip. "He's probably just obsessed with her right now because she gives him a hard time. Once he gets bored of it, he'll be back to his usual prince charming/casanova mode."

"What the heck?" Hanta protests, "What did I do to deserve this kind of slander?"

"You literally have not had a single steady relationship since you were in high school." Kazuho accuses.

"So? It's not like that's not normal for a college student!" Hanta defends.

"Yeah, but the way you look like you're about to start panting with your tongue out every time you get a text makes me sick, knowing that you're probably just gonna move on by the next time we see you." She groans with her tongue out, rolling her eyes, "Just like you do with every person you're 'into' for a month."

"I resent that!"

"Uh huh, of course you do."

"Hey, hey, Kazuho, let him be." Koichi comes in to mediate, "I mean, you never know. Hanta might've found someone he really clicks with."

Hanta is about to thank Koichi for coming to his defense, until his friend continues with:

"Besides, even if he's got a bit of a high turnover rate, that doesn't mean he didn't genuinely like them. Honestly, a month is pretty good for Hanta."

Sometimes, he forgets about that dense and indirectly rude side of his friend.

This is probably why he only ever sees them a few times a year.

"Okay, whatever." Hanta dismisses, "I don't care what you guys think. But I'm being serious right now. And for your information, I've been seeing her for like, two months now."

"'Seeing her' as in dating her or sleeping with her?" Kazuho raises a skeptical brow at him.

"Well... yeah, we've mostly been just sleeping together but I'm planning on asking her out officially once we talk at the party tonight."

"Right. 'Cause that's definitely gonna go over smoothly." Kazuho drawls as she goes back to sorting her skirts and boots.

"What? What's that supposed to mean?" Hanta pinches his brows together at the comment.

"You really think some girl you've been treating like your favorite booty call is gonna believe you wanna be serious all of a sudden?" She rolls her eyes, "If she's smart, she'll probably laugh at you, at best."

As much as Hanta wants to puff his chest out and argue, he doesn't take the bait. Kazuho might be overly blunt sometimes, but she only calls it like she sees it.

All that means is that Hanta has to prove himself to her, too.

"She is smart," he acknowledges, "but it isn't sudden. I've... I started liking her a while ago. It's different this time, okay? At least, I want it to be."

"Uh huh. So have you even asked her on a date?"

"I've tried. But she would always brush me off. And even when we started seeing each other, she'd always leave before we could do anything else."

"Commitment issues?" Koichi guesses.

"No. I don't think that's it." Hanta sighs, "I mean, I'm pretty sure she likes me back... She just... doesn't know how to say it."

Kazuho is pinning him with a harsh, judging brow while Koichi is just blinking at him like he doesn't know how much of this to believe yet.

But Hanta takes another breath before saying, "Look. I know it must be hard to believe, coming from me. But I really like this girl, okay? Can't you just have a little faith in me?"

From the way Kazuho stares at him, he can tell she's trying to get him to break character or something. But after failing to gauge the reaction she expected, she sighs and stands with her hands on her hips.

"Fine, if you say so." she relents with a sigh, "But I can't let you go to your holiday party looking like that."

Hanta furrows his brows as he looks down at his loose t-shirt and cargo pants. It's simple, but it's clean. And it suits him.

"What's wrong with this?"

"I think it looks fine." Koichi shrugs, "I mean, even though your rich friend is hosting, it's still just a casual party, isn't it?"

"Casual party?! Do you think she's going to be showing up in fucking athleisure or something? If she likes Hanta back and is planning to see him tonight, then what the fuck do you think she's gonna wear?"

"Uhh..." Koichi trails off but Hanta is silent, thoughts suddenly running wild with all kinds of cute or sexy outfits you might show up in.

Santa Claus dress and hat?

Sweater and jeans?

Something Cellophane themed?

You'd probably look cute even with an ugly sweater on.

God, he can't wait to see you...

Kazuho lets out a loud groan, having mistook his silence for obliviousness, "This is why men are useless."

"Okay, now that's a little harsh, don't you thin—"

"Shut up, Koichi. And get the keys." Kazuho demands, "We're going to Hanta's place to fix him up."

"Wait, what? But Yaomomo's party is starting soon." Hanta protests, getting up from his own seat, "She might already be waiting for me."

"Well are you serious about her or not?" Kazuho demands, eyes almost venomous.

"I am, I am!"

"Then at least look the part." She rolls her eyes as she goes to grab her jacket, "If you really want to prove it to her, you've gotta put in effort, Hanta. None of your usual charming, playboy, smooth talk bullshit. That shit makes it so hard to take you seriously."

Hanta almost trips over his feet.

And it hits him all over again.

Because you had said that exact same thing.

He forgets how logical Kazuho is behind all the berating sometimes, but maybe he needs her help after all.

"Then what am I supposed to say to prove it to her?"

"Do you seriously not know the answer to that?" Kazuho only stops to give him a deadpan look before huffing at his blank expression and turning back to her shoes. "Just be fucking honest, Hanta. Say what you really mean."

"Maybe without all of the embellishments." Koichi adds, slipping on his own shoes.

"Right. Honest." Hanta gulps as he follows his friends out the door, "I can do that."

—

Turns out, honesty has duality. It can be transparent, or even reflective, like mirrored glass. Or it can be lethal, like gunpowder.

Because if he's honest right now, he'd like nothing more than to throw a few punches at every single dude in the engineering department.

It's one thing to see that pretty boy Kaibara using his eyes to lick you up and down, but it's another to try and fabricate a kiss between you two.

What the fuck is Tetsutetsu even doing? Walking around like a holiday matchmaker. He has to know that he's breeding awkwardness in all that chaos, right? Marching around with that dumb mistletoe fishing rod he's dangling around like a cat toy.

Hanta only got here thirty minutes ago and he was already attacked by Denki, who apparently had Mina on the line, who ended up yelling at him over the phone to get his ass over to karaoke room 3 or wherever.

And holy shit, did he walk in on a scene.

He had half a mind to walk up to Kaibara and yank that damn mic out of his hand. The sleazy way he was eye-fucking you under the guise of the song you were singing together, twirling you under his arm with a charming smile.

It made Hanta want to puke.

Never mind the fact that he would probably do the exact same thing if he were in that situation.

But then Mina gets a hold of him and starts yelling all sorts of shit at him.

"About fucking time! Where have you been all night?! I've been calling and texting you like crazy!" She demands, then proceeds to interrupt Hanta's attempt at an explanation anyway.

"Do you see this? Do you see what's happening right now? Kaibara has been trying to slide in for the past hour! Hello? Ring any bells? Her fuckboy-ex-Kaibara?"

"Yeah, I'm aware." Hanta deadpans as he glares over at the couch area where you and Kaibara are still singing together.

You look stunning. So cute in that skirt and beret. He wouldn't be surprised if you had been approached by more than just Kaibara tonight.

"So are you going to do something about this?!" Mina asks, "She still doesn't know how you feel about her after all this time! I can't believe you're showing up this late when you apparently promised that you were gonna talk to her."

"I know! I know. I just—" Hanta grunts out a sigh, "I am gonna talk to her, alright? My friends got me held up for a while, but I'm here now. I swear to god, this is practically the only thing I came for tonight."

"Well I hope you've got a good speech prepared or something, because that—" she points her chin towards the other side of the room, where Tetsutetsu has suddenly appeared, causing a ruckus, "—could very well be the least of your problems."

The new few minutes feel kind of like a fever dream. A really fucking painful one.

He literally starts sweating when he sees that mistletoe appear over your head.

His heart is beating in his ears as he's stuck watching you exchange gazes with Kaibara.

For a moment, he's offered reprieve when you turn your cheek over to him instead. But then it's shattered in the next when that pretty boy up and kisses you anyway.

There's pain in his chest. A sharp one.

An amalgamation of fear, shock, and realization. As much as it hurts, it also reinforces just how much he likes you.

It wouldn't hurt this much if he didn't really, truly like you.

And if anything, the pain is just a reminder that he's gonna have to fight for you. He's got to put in effort. He's got to prove his worth and his love for you.

Wait, did he just say—

A harsh smack onto both of his shoulders brings his attention back to Mina, who starts shaking him a bit, "Get your head in the game, Hanta. The only reason she's even giving that guy her time right now is because you still haven't made her think that you're serious about her. Which, honestly, I don't even know how that's possible. But it is."

He's about to reply when he sees you coming their way. And suddenly everything seems to freeze.

"Hey." He says first.

"Hey." You reply easily enough, "I was uh, I was looking for you."

"Yeah, me too." He says immediately, "Sorry I didn't text you. I was out all day and my phone died on me."

Which isn't untrue. His phone had died when Kazuho was ransacking his closet to put together an outfit for him, and he had forgotten to plug it in before he left.

"Oh." You nod, seeming to accept the excuse for now.

Mina gets you some water, which you accept, and Hanta impulsively comments, "That was a pretty eventful song."

It doesn't come out as funny as he thought it would.

"Yeah, I'll say." You sigh, at least sounding like you didn't enjoy it.

"Are you okay?" Mina asks you, her eyes quickly darting to Hanta as if to urge him to follow up or something.

"I'll be fine." You say, meeting Hanta's eyes a little more directly as you continue, "But I could use some air."

That's his cue. He offers to bring you outside, just hoping and praying that this whole honesty thing goes well.

—

Now that he has a moment, he can't stop looking at you.

Which is nothing new, really. But fuck, do you look cute tonight.

Kazuho was right. You did come dressed to kill him tonight. And despite how long it took, he's pretty glad she helped him out with this fit too. Because your eyes keep sweeping him just the same.

He could really just stare at you all night, showering you in compliments and hopefully kisses, but eventually, it comes out.

He can't stop himself from asking.

"So. You and Kaibara, huh?"

To his slight surprise — and delight — you react with a scoff and a shake of your head at the mention, as if you’re already sick of the memory.

“It was just mistletoe.” You say.

“Yeah, I know.”

He knows. He does, but it hurt to see anyway.

It’s something he never really wants to see again.

“I heard from Mina though,” he takes it one thing at a time, “that… you and he had a thing before.”

You face stiffens a bit as you worry at your lip, before admitting, “Yeah. I guess you could call it a ‘thing.’ Not totally dissimilar to the thing we have going on right now.”

Not dissimilar?

Fuck, that is the last thing he wants. To be compared to your lame fuckboy ex.

Hanta has wholly believed that what he has been sharing with you is special. He had assumed that you thought the same, but clearly that was lost somewhere in the haze. And if he doesn’t clear it up tonight, he might lose you.

So he asks, “Yeah? And what kind of ‘thing’ do we have going on, exactly?”

“I don’t know, actually.” You shrug, “That’s what we’re here to talk about tonight, isn’t it?”

“Right.” He agrees.

After a short pause, you speak up first, “I’ll tell you this though: I do not want another Kaibara situation. What happened between me and Sen… really fucking sucked.” You let out a short sigh as you look over the balcony into Yaomomo’s overly extravagant garden, “I really liked him, but he didn’t want anything serious. So he kind of just let me fade into the background and I was pretty messed up over it for a while.”

“What the hell? What an asshole!” Hanta reacts before he can stop himself.

His blood is boiling as all of the pieces start coming together.

You caught feelings for Kaibara, and that fucker didn’t even bother to let you down. To let you move on properly.

And now with that deep impression left in your heart, it’s no wonder you were wary of Hanta at the beginning.

But even after all of that, he still has the nerve to come crawling back to you under the good graces of winter holiday spirit and high-end booze. He could kill that shitface right now.

“He hasn’t changed, that much I know.” You stop Hanta with a hand up, so he exhales and beats down the urge to march back in there and start something. “Which is why I didn’t fall for it this time. I don’t like him anymore, so it wasn’t that hard.”

Hanta sucks in a deep breath, leaning on the railing to sigh it all back out as the relief starts to trickle into his body.

Okay. You don’t like him anymore.

You said it yourself.

Loud and clear.

He can only take your word for it.

But then you start to talk about how he and Kaibara are actually kind of similar, which leaves a bitter taste in his mouth. Because the more things you list off, the more textbook fuckboy Hanta feels.

And yeah, he admits to a lot of it. The smooth talking, the height, the confidence, even the fucking photography hobby.

Even so, he at least knows this.

“Well if he was stupid enough to let you go only to come crawling back with an assist from Mistletoe Man, then I’d argue that we’re nothing alike.”

You give him a chuckle for that, that sweet smile gracing your face that makes his heart beat just a little faster, “I know that you and he aren’t the same. Like what you said over the phone that other night. I don’t think he would have ever told me something like that. And… I was actually really happy to hear it.”

Fuck, he wants to kiss you right now.

Something about your honesty is just… endearing. Sweet. It warms his heart and makes him feel light.

And if your honesty makes him feel like this, it just reinforces how much he needs to return the favor.

“But still. If there’s any chance that it’s gonna turn out like how it did with Sen, then I’d rather know all that now.” You say with clear, unwavering purpose, “Because even if you say you like me, if you’re just gonna keep me around when it’s convenient but still mess around with whoever you want, then I’d rather we just stop all of this. Here and now.”

“I don’t want that.” He says immediately.

Even the thought of stopping this with you grips at his heart harder than that kiss saw earlier.

He can’t. He doesn’t want to lose you.

And he’ll do anything to prove that to you.

“I don’t know what kind of shit was going through that jackass’s head, but I’m not stupid enough to treat you like a backup plan.”

He takes a step closer to you, slipping a hand into yours.

He’s going to put it all on the table. No more hiding behind all the smooth talk and physical chemistry. You’re gonna see everything.

“[Name], I meant what I said. I really do like you.”

And probably for the first time, he’s completely honest. He pours his heart out as best he can. Feeling like he might spill over any second.

Yeah, a line slips out here and there, but you take it with good grace, your usual eye roll and all.

But you take all of his honesty, and you give it right back. Until you finally open his eyes a little wider.

“I mean, all you’d ever do is take me straight back to your room. It’s not like you ever tried to ask me out on a date. And sometimes—" you pause to take a breath, as if wondering if you should even say whatever else you’re thinking, “Sometimes, I’d still see you around campus getting close to or flirty with other people. Only a few days after we were together, too. Can’t say that really inspires confidence that you were ‘serious’ about me…”

He what.

Other people?

That can’t be—

Shit. Okay.

He supposes he can think of an instance or two where he might have been around campus getting a little close with a pretty girl or a cute guy. But it was nothing outside of his usual behavior, so he didn’t think much of it.

But if you saw it and thought otherwise… Hanta can hardly blame you for thinking that.

Especially after finding out how it feels to see you with someone else.

The only thing he can do now is own up to it and hope you’ll still have him.

“You’re right.” He admits.

He admits everything to you.

How he started out treating you like one of his usual pursuits, then wondering why you left such a mark on him once you were gone.

How he thought his usual charm would eventually wear you down, when you were the one who was chipping away at him.

How somehow, you had struck right into his heart without him knowing, and turned him into some lovesick animal.

And how he was wrong not to do his due diligence and treat you like the treasure that you are.

Hell, he even admits to you the photo-staring thing — which is really fucking lame. Why did he think to do that? His mouth just kept running and now he’s just straight up embarrassing himself.

And most importantly, he tells you how much he likes you. Upfront and personal.

He likes it when you sing and harmonize out of nowhere.

He likes the way you eat your heart out.

He likes how you use French to run away from telling him something that makes you feel shy.

He likes all of those things.

“I—” you start to say before a shiver runs down your body, the night cold suddenly clicking into place in Hanta’s idiot head.

“You’re cold. My bad, I forgot you’re only wearing a sweater.”

He starts pulling at his zipper, even though you insist that he not give up his jacket. Which he’s obviously not going to do if you’re standing here, cold and shivering.

But your brilliant little brain brings you right into his arms as you cuddle into his chest, hiding away from the cold like his embrace is all you need to feel protected.

Something about that makes his chest bloom beneath your cheek. Because you’re bringing yourself closer to him. You’re still here after he laid his heart bare for you. You still… want him, even after all the weird miscommunication and missteps. You—

“I like you.” You say, striking an arrow right into his heart. “I really like you. I think— I think behind all the playboy, machismo stuff, you’re really one of the coolest, most interesting, and fun people I’ve gotten to know. So I… uhm… I wanna…”

FUUUUUUUUCCKKKKK.

Hanta wants to scream into the sky right now — because you are just so freaking CUTE.

But he can’t bear to look away from you now.

You’re facing him head-on, so he has to wait for you to say the rest.

But damn it if he doesn’t want to just lean in and kiss your forehead as you take a nervous breath in to say, “I just… wanna see where this goes. For us. For real.”

Well. He supposes that’s the best he can get out of you. And he doesn’t mind a bit.

There’s already a huge grin on his face, so he couldn’t hide his joy even if he tried.

“Yeah. I’m good with that.” He says, trying to play it cool as if he didn’t just spill his guts to you two minutes ago.

“With only you and me, right?” You pin him with a scolding, yet pouty look as you look up at him through your lashes.

“Only you and me.” He smiles.

“Okay. Good. Me, too.”

“Great.”

“Yeah.”

Fuck. You are the cutest.

He has to kiss you. There’s no possible way he can hold off any longer.

And when he does, he can tell something’s changed.

There’s no more holding back, from either of you. You’re kissing him like you have nothing to be afraid of anymore. And he kisses you as if swearing to protect you, to reassure you that you’re right — that you have nothing to be afraid of.

It tastes different. Heavily seasoned with sort of newfound trust and eagerness.

It’s saturated with new emotions like some colors have been corrected in a photo.

And god— it feels so, so good. Somehow better than before. It feels like… It feels like—

Love.

This is it.

It’s here, right in his very own arms.

That special connection he had always known was real in the back of his mind, that he had seen in all the movies and books and people around him.

It’s real. And it’s right here. In your voice when you sing, in your eyes when you look at him, in your witty retorts and jokes and banter. In the way you kiss him, and hold him like you just can’t get close enough. And it’s in the way your body just feels like heaven in his hands.

He’s had a feeling for a long time, but he’s fairly sure about it now.

Es amor.

Es todo lo que yo soñé.

It only gets better as you ask him dance, start singing along to the Spanish song playing like you know the exact dialect of his love language, and then leading him right to a hanging mistletoe to overwrite that kiss he saw earlier.

He doesn't think it could get any better than this, but then you lead him right over to Mina, and hand him the sweetest photo he has ever seen.

"Here. For you."

It takes a few seconds for the photo to develop properly but it gives Hanta the time to figure out just what you were up to in the past few minutes.

You ran off to Mina to get her to take the photo, distracted him with your super cute Spanish singing, and choreographed a kiss to get this... absolutely perfect shot.

And you did it all right under his nose.

"You're always taking photos of me, but we don't really have any of us together. So here's one to start," you say, gesturing at the polaroid, "Candid, honest subject and all. Like you like it, right?"

He's a goner.

How could he not fall in love with someone like you? You just make it way too easy.

And on the other hand, he's done the opposite for you. He's almost ashamed that you went on thinking that he didn't care for you for as long as you did.

Well, there'll be no more of that.

He's going to love you up and down until every single doubt is scrubbed clean from your pretty little head. And he's gonna be thorough about it.

Starting tonight.

"Ready to get out of here?" He asks you after ignoring a smug, but encouraging look from Mina.

You nod and take his hand with the prettiest smile he's ever seen, "Vamos."

— — —

Love is like learning another language. 

Exciting, intriguing, a challenge in communication, discovering new cues, slang, cultural contexts, not to mention extremely difficult to keep up with. Especially because it takes time to learn.

But Hanta loves every part of it. 

Learning to love you is different from everyone he's loved before. Sure, there's family and friends, and even some first loves and crushes, but something about loving you feels like he's really building character within himself.

By studying you, what you like, how to make you laugh, what makes you upset, how to read all your different expressions, how to speak to you appropriately, what turns you on or off, and how you like him to treat you, Hanta feels like he's becoming more fluent every day.

And he keeps wanting to learn more. He wants to become so fluent in loving you, that it just curls and slides off his tongue like another part of him. 

He wants it to be so apparent how much time and practice that he's put in, that you never second guess how he feels about you again.

And Hanta would say he's gotten pretty good at it.

Honestly and humbly speaking, he’s a natural. He’s always enjoyed expressing himself, finding new ways to present his thoughts and personality in any medium. 

That’s how it is with photography. That's how it is with all the Spanish dialects his family speaks. And that's how it is with love.

Sometimes he likes to mix them all together.

He really can't resist that look you get when he starts talking to you in Spanish. The way your eyes become a little more hidden behind your lashes and your bottom lip slightly disappears behind the press of your teeth. The way you stare up at him, silently pleading for him to speak more because you're too shy to ask him outright.

He likes how your aura changes a little whenever he brings out the camera. Sometimes, it shrinks as you shy away from him, but then grows and gets reshaped after a little guidance. He learns how good you are with directions as he tells you how to pose or look at him, suddenly giving him the most gorgeous snapshots despite your tendency to curl back into yourself soon afterward.

He's learned to time it all perfectly to coax out that perfect, picturesque side of you when you're on top, riding him like an amateur pornstar while the camera's rolling on the nightstand. When you become a cockdrunk little showoff for his phone camera, Hanta knows that all the hours put into studying you are worth it.

However, he's still a long way from mastery. He's reminded of that every time you roll your eyes and groan at him. Which he usually doesn't mind.

But sometimes, he runs into problems that feel a lot like tackling a tricky grammar lesson. Things that he just can't wrap his head around.

"No."

"Aw, come on baby. Why not?" He pleads, "You don't think it'll be fun?"

"I already told you, Hanta, I don't want to be a model." You continue to resist.

"But you model for me all the time." He says.

"If it's for you, it's different. I can trust you. But I don't even know this guy. Can't you just ask him to find someone else?"

Okay, he kind of likes hearing that you'll make exceptions for him. But he wants to do this with you. And he already promised his friend to give it a try.

One of his buddies in his photography circle is working on a cool project for his final portfolio before graduation, and it involves capturing different expressions of love. So he's been reaching out to all the steady couples he knows to model for him.

Hanta was eager to join in on the project, and since you agreed to model for his own personal projects before — and even let him post the photos online — he figured you would be onboard with this.

So he really did not expect this vehement refusal.

"I mean, I can. But I wanted to do it with you." He tries pouting, "I thought it'd be cool to add a few more photos of us to the books."

You make a noise of disgruntled surprise at that, finally showing some hesitance in your expression. A good sign, so he should keep rolling with it.

"I've been friends with this guy for a couple years now, so you have my word that he won't do anything weird with the photos." He swears, stepping into your space to wind his arms around your waist and make it harder for you to avoid him, "If he ever tried anything though, you know I'd kick his culo right off the block, right?"

Instead of answering, you just glare up at him as you stay captured in his arms, not pulling away but not leaning into him just yet, either.

"Besides, don't you think it'd be cool to have a nice framed print of us just being sexy together? You know I'd hang it right above my bed." He teases, leaning down to nose at you before leaving a light, feathery kiss on your lips. Not coercing you, but enough to be a little persuasive.

You inhale deeply through your nose before slowly sighing, still glaring as you say, "I still get dm's from random people who found me from your photos. I don't need more."

That's still quite the mystery for him. Hanta has never tagged you in the photos he's posted of you (upon your request), and you're on private, so he has no idea how people still end up finding you to hound you for modeling jobs or just be thirsty in your dm's.

Though he also really can't blame them. You look incredible on camera even without Hanta's photo edits. It only makes him that much prouder that you chose to be with him.

"Well, it is a couples concept shoot. If you're with me, then they'll get the idea." He says, smiling into another kiss to your lips.

You scoff, but you don't push him away, "As if that'll stop them from trying."

"Let 'em." He accepts the challenge, "I'm not afraid of a few online fuckboys."

"Like you aren't one yourself."

"Not anymore. Those days are behind me." He leaves a kiss on your nose this time, noting that your glare has already softened into more of a reluctant pout, "I'm a changed and committed man. And I want everyone to know it. That's why I want to do this photo shoot."

He keeps you pressed close to his waist but lifts one hand up to lift your chin higher so he can look deeper into your eyes, mustering all his sincerity and charm into his next breath, "Come on, querida. Won't you let me show the world how much I love you?"

You close your eyes with a groan, but Hanta can tell by the slight tremor of your body that you're not writing him off for this one. In fact, it's clear that he's won when you press yourself closer to his chest and start kissing him as you cling to his shoulders.

He exchanges kisses and breaths with you for a generous while before you finally pull away and agree with a heady gaze, "Fine. Let's do it."

"Mm, thank you, baby." He hums as he lifts you up by the thighs to carry you into his bedroom to finish this conversation in private.

Though even if he convinces you to come, it doesn't put you at ease when the day comes to be photographed.

"So, the theme is kind of about how people express love for each other." Togaru explains the day of the shoot.

Hanta's friend had rented out the studio for a few days to work on his project, and it is decked out with all kinds of materials.

There's a bunch of photography and lighting equipment already provided by the studio, but the wardrobe, the makeup station, and the collection of lenses laid out on one of the tables are all Togaru.

He's really going all out with this portfolio, and Hanta can only respect it.

"I'm doing friends, family, and obviously, you guys are one of my couples." Togaru continues, "So is there some sort of motif or metaphor that you always fall back into when you think about your relationship?"

Hanta blows a raspberry through his lips, shuffling through all of the cheesy things he's thought of before, "How do I even pick?"

He throws out several ideas, just to get the ball rolling. He brings up the language metaphor, color concepts, smoke (as a metaphor and an activity), Spanish terms he's learned to like, his own photography that he uses to capture moments of you to keep forever.

Honestly, he could take any trope from a movie or show and apply it to how he feels for you. It's actually harder than he thought to nail it down to one motif.

So he's really curious to hear what your take is.

"Those are all great. We can work with a lot of them." Togaru says, "How about you, [Surname]?"

You hum thoughtfully before saying, "I don't know. I like a lot of those too. But for me... it'd have something to do with music, I guess." You quickly turn to look at Hanta as you elaborate, "I feel like a lot of special moments we shared usually had a song involved. Something that I can listen to again that will take me back to that very moment in time."

Hanta looks right back at you, reflecting back on the days he was still getting to know you.

And now that he thinks about it, you're right. There are tons of moments like that where a good song is playing and creating a core memory of you and him.

That time when he first heard you sing in person, crooning in French as he laid his head in your lap.

That Pink Martini album he played when you came to his room for the first time.

That song you taught him to harmonize to and practically rediscover.

All of the other albums he would listen to and discuss with you on late afternoons, half naked and sharing a joint.

That Spanish song you danced and sang along to at that holiday party the night he and you agreed to be official.

All of the CDs you would gift him, adding your own favorites to his collection. Making an entirely new library for the two of you to share.

Of course. That makes so much sense.

It all feels so obvious now, the music theme. He's spent so much time studying you and falling in love with you just by listening to music with you in his room, or listening to you sing, or dancing with you at a party. Sometimes, it feels so obvious that he forgets about it.

Maybe that's a sign of fluency. It's so embedded into his brain and his relationship with you that it just comes naturally enough for him not to think about it anymore.

It's already a part of him. You're a part of him.

Just like he had hoped you'd be.

"And... I dunno." You continue, turning back to Togaru, "Sometimes I feel like getting to know him is like listening to a new album. I may have some sort of expectation from the artist, but he ends up surprising me every now and again." You tilt your head as you slip Hanta a small, but slightly cheeky smile, subtly sliding your hand into his, "And it's not like I always love every song, but I'll always listen to it again. And sing along to my favorite parts."

And there it is again.

Your aura that seems to just slow down time.

The way you change the taste of the air around him with your thick honey gaze and quiet flirting expression. That subtle tension that makes it impossible to look away from you, since the first time he watched you cast your spell on someone else.

He'll get caught in it as many times as you'll set the trap for him.

If only he could get away with staying in these moments with you forever.

"Okay! I'm liking this idea." Togaru claps his hands together as he rolls with it, "If we're talking music, are we talking dancing? Big bachata man Sero, here and all."

"Oh dude, no. If it's music, then that is so [Name]." Hanta jumps on the concept immediately, "She can sing."

"No kidding?" Togaru gives you an impressed smile.

"Hanta, no." You huff, letting go of his hand to smack him in the arm, "Why are you telling him that?"

"Because it's true?" Hanta raises an eyebrow at you, "Come on, dude. Let's go put on a playlist. I know just how to get this going now."

About ten minutes later, Hanta's got you spinning around by the hand to loosen you up for the camera, a mix of his and your favorite songs echoing through the room from the studio's speakers.

You're resistant and shy at first, but after some coaxing, you warm up to his silly demeanor and start dancing with him. The initial awkwardness starts chipping away step by step, until you eventually give yourself away to a bright laugh and your favorite chorus.

Neither of you stop as Togaru starts snapping away with his DSLR, the music making this foreign studio environment feel as natural as his bedroom.

"Okay, yes. That's beautiful." He praises, giving you or Hanta a placement direction every so often.

Then, as a softer ballad starts playing, you pause and look up at him as you focus on harmonizing with the singer, holding a finger up as if to keep yourself concentrated while you casually just start singing like an angel.

Togaru introduces a cube stool for the two of you to sit on, and he starts giving you directions on how to pose. Then he allows you free rein to keep singing like you usually do as he does his thing.

The rest of the shoot is just so much fun, and even better when he sees you enjoying yourself along with him. The raw preview photos are just stunning, even at a glance.

Every single one of them is gorgeous. Not only with the composition, but the lighting, the color correction, the atmosphere. He can feel something coming through in these photos.

Man, Togaru is good at this. Hanta always learns something new from his art.

It only takes about a week for Togaru to send him the final edited versions. And damn, he can't even choose a favorite. There are so many good ones.

A couple of the dancing shots, but with different compositions. Some that are full of motion in the waves of your twirling skirt. Some where you're looking at Hanta with an expression full of whimsy, joy, and trust. Hanta looks lovestruck as usual, but with a warm, settling comfort that he doesn't think he had before.

There are also a few more casual shots, like where you're both caught mid-laugh, his arms around you as he lifts you by the waist from behind. Or another fitting shot of you just looking at him with deadpan sarcasm while he looks almost like a con artist type of flirt.

However, there is one in particular that stands out to Hanta.

One where, somehow, Togaru managed to capture and recreate that thick, pretty aura that you always seamlessly emulate.

It's one of the shots of you sitting back to back with Hanta on that cube stool. He's got his legs spread long and wide across a corner of the cube, looking relaxed but reasonably hypnotized as he tries to sneak a peek at the siren behind him.

But you. You're simply leaning back against him, eyes closed and head resting back against his shoulder as you sing out a gorgeous note that he can hear even through this still photo. You've got a knee hugged to your torso, but you look relaxed and in the zone as you smile into your note.

Absolutely beautiful.

He posts them online as soon as he gets the okay from you, eager to show you off. To flaunt you as his.

Querida 🖤 thanks @kamakiri.togaru for letting us be part of your final portfolio. you really took no prisoners with this one! it was cool getting to model for a change

The comments come in hot, burning him with affection, embarrassment, and laughter.

kaminari.bolt brooooo these are so 🔥🔥🔥 who knew ur simp ass could work the camera too 😎

redriot yo these look so good!! u guys look awesome :,)

acid.pinky AHHHHHH!!!!! MY BABIES!!!! i love you both so much istg i need these printed and framed in MY house 😩😩😩💞

kamakiri.togaru thanks for letting me shoot you guys! honestly some of my best models ever

deepdope you two look so good together!

toru_16 💗💗💗 [name] is so gorgeous 🥺 work it sero! 😉

o.mashirao 👍👍👍

popstep.kzh we get it. you're in love 🙄

crawler_koichi nice to see you in front of the camera for once! it suits you :)

shoto.tdrk 👍

yaomomo What a beautiful set of photos! Très magnifique! ❤️

He puts his phone down when the random thirsty commenters start coming in. Most of them predictably asking about you, as usual. Dumbasses who don't realize that all the photos of you on his page are still hard launches, despite them being photography projects.

But it doesn't matter. He has better things to do than worry about dudes who are (understandably) thirsty for his girlfriend.

Like stare at more pictures of his girlfriend.

He was only able to post a few of them, but this file is full of great shots that he could spend hours staring at for his own enjoyment.

So many precious captured moments for him to pour over. To admire and study. To tattoo into his mind to keep forever.

The only thing that could possibly make this any better is—

"Hey, babe. Shouto let me in." A knock and your voice emerge from his opening door, and the angel that's been crossing his mind all day appears like a blessing in his own room.

"Hey, beautiful." He greets you, spinning to face you in his desk chair.

He's about to stand up and walk over to give you a proper hello kiss, but you immediately paddle over to him once you catch sight of his computer screen.

"Oh! Are those all of the other photos that Kamakiri sent you? I wanna see!"

And then you plop yourself right onto his lap and spin the chair back towards the desktop to start clicking around.

Hanta can only smile as you start cooing at all the different photos you didn't get to see yet. Wrapping an arm around your waist, he brings your back right into his chest so he can tuck his chin onto your shoulder — leaving a quick kiss on your temple — before he settles his hand over yours on his wireless mouse.

"Lemme show you this one."

As he spends the next hour looking through all of the photos with you, discussing photography concepts and praising how good you both look, Hanta feels incredible satisfaction settle into his heart.

He really can't think of anything else that's made him feel this way. So full of joy and pride and affection and just— love.

This is love.

Es amor.

Just having you sit here on his lap as he sifts through photos with you. Or listening to an album together. Or sharing a meal you prepared together. Or arguing over some small misstep before talking it out and making up. Or learning something new about you today that he can use to make you happy tomorrow.

All of that's love.

Es amor.

And he's glad he found it with you.

— END —

a/n: if you don't recognize them, koichi and kazuho are characters from bnha: vigilantes (a spinoff story in the bnha universe) btw! i thought their personalities/dynamic were super funny and perfect for the role i wrote them into.

a youtube playlist for this fic, or my own personal spotify playlist for those of you who might be interested. lots of songs that inspired me and got me in my feels for this story. and link to the master post if you wanna keep it bookmarked in the case you'd like to find this fic again!

ty so so much for reading, interacting, and sharing your love for sero with me! pls feel free to share with me all of your final thoughts as well! bisous and besos to all of you 🥰💋

#sero hanta x reader #bnha x reader #sero hanta #ty again to leo for the spanish help i have really bothered them too much for this silly fic 😔🌹 #and once again ty for those of you who've been waiting patiently for the last *checks watch* 3 months lmao #hope it wraps up nicely. i'm honestly horrid with endings #drabble #mine

[astroismypassion]

Hey, I need to know your opinion here. It's totally fine if you don't wanna but just read maybe you'll enjoy 🤣

My moon and venus is in his 8h and my sun in his 7h; his sun is in my 8h, his moon is in my 9h and his venus in my 7h.

Sometimes I feel very overwhelmed— like why are you so obsessed with me?🤡 like what does he even sees in me??

He constantly tells me that he would leave his family if they tried to stop us being together (I'm assamese and he's a nepali— different tribes also his family knows about us but mine doesn't cuz they are strict asf)

I will not lie, at first I totally ignored him (for 2 year💀 kinda on and off contact- we were classmates) but there was something about him that kept pulling me towards him like crazy istg

He can't express very well nor can I wait he's actually better at expressing his feelings compared to me.

He's lost his v card and I have not. For me, my v card needs to go to someone who is gonna be my permanent not 'maybe/temporary'— he thinks otherwise. So different values and morals.

He constantly spends money and have to keep reminding him to be more strict with his finances (this one irks me so bad)

He gets jealous so fcking easily— like I do too but I try to rationalize my feelings and tell myself that "no they're are just friends, he can have friends okayyy!!" I try to control my possesiveness but no he doesn't.

This is actually my first serious relationship. I'm scared that I will lose my v card to him— no bad if we are the end game but if not then i don't wanna give other than my future hubby TT

I'm scared to commit with him bcs in his past he played around with different girls (NO I'M NOT A 'I CAN FIX HIM' ENERGY 😭) but he claims that I'm the first girl he wants to be with and commit too (his sister told me that he never cried for any girl in his past except for one but that was long ago and now he cries for me bcs I don't trust him) yesterday he told me that "you are making me crazy— are you having fun by having a guy run behind you like a dog??" I was speechless. He was drunk btw he called an hour ago apologizing (he doesn't remember anything he apologized cus his roommates kept scaring him that he told me shit) we haven't talked after that tho

Like always it's an on and off connection.

Okay there's so many things I wanna spill but I'll stop here. Thank you for reading, I hope you had fun my reading my tea lol 😹 anyways

Byeeee<333

Hi!

Hm, lots of complex questions these days in my mailbox. No, but it's alright. I understand the 8th house synastry desire to vent haha. Honestly, so much is to be said, when you are in an 8th house connection.

Definitely don't rush losing v card with the said person. You sound indecisive, which often leads to a "no". Remember that when you are unclear, confused or unsure about something, it's because it's probably a "no". I think that 8th house connections (especially with Sun in the 8th or Mercury in the 8th overlay) are not really worth losing your v card, if you are not beforehand in a committed, mutual partnership with this person. Otherwise, it's just regret and kind of feeling present you would wish to wait it out for someone that you truly have a mutual respect of boundaries in the connection with. If this has not been discussed and establish beforehand, I advise to not engage in any type of sexual activity. Sex might overly complicate already complex situation and when it's sex and feelings involved, the confusion is even stronger after. Don't think that by having sex this will give you more clarity. Try to simplify things for yourself and not overly complicate them, mutual respect is very important.

#astrology #astroismypassion #astro notes #astroblr #astro community #astro note #astro observations #natal chart #astrology blog #chart reading

[ahoyimlosingmymind]

You dislike Sophie? Any particular reason?

This is all my opinion, I'm not even concrete in it ngl, there's just lil things that irk me about her character. I also haven't read the books in a fatty minute, so maybe I'm just delulu. its also 2am so hehe

Similar to how I feel about Keefe, it really comes down to execution of her character for me. I don't have as in depth thoughts on her as I do about Keefe's character, but anyway-

I really really loved her in books 1-5. <- I just think this was the golden age for the books in general but I digress. She was very moral, sweet, and logical. She rushed into danger and questioned things, which landed her in hot crap sometimes. But there was always a REAL motive behind her desire to not listen to the authority figures. She was really relatable in the way she wasn't totally over-powered, still trying to find her footing in this new world etc

But then, at some point, I'm not really sure WHEN it happened, Shannon decided that every single one of her female characters needed to be a girl-boss. No exceptions. And this was when I noticed the shift in Sophie's character. She lost her distinction a bit imo. you could easily interchange any of her 'Girl power'-esque lines with any other girl in the series and I wouldn't blink. That's how little her 'confident character development' sticks out to me. Because it comes off as FORCED.

here's the thing. Sophie already was a girl boss character. It was obvious. From book 1, she was brave and selfless and moral and strong... I love her for that.

The issue is that the narrative became aware of it too. And started TELLING us instead of letting her actions speak for themselves.

This telling was greatly reinforced by characters like Ro who always has to comment on being bad ass. And like- Linh losing some of her original softness for the sake of being 'powerful' and I AM ALL FOR empowering stories and characters- but when they lose the original aspects of their personality for the sake of it?? That's not growth, it's erasure. Confidence and softness aren't mutually exclusive. And when Linh was first introduced, that was one of the shining aspects of her personality. But now, There's so little distinction between a lot of the girl characters now for this reason. They serve as a comment on society, they're vessels to embed a message into. And they lose their individualism within that. BC THE MESSAGE WAS ALREADY THERE. IT DIDN'T NEED TO BE EXPLICITLY STATED EVERY OTHER PAGE. *cough* sorry.

And sadly, Sophie's character got lost in the sauce with it for me. (And it does not help that the side cast of characters is so vast they kinda blend together as well)

What really got me though, was when she started making weird choices that felt like forced edginess. Like burning down the storehouse. She's done some crazy stuff in the past, but I was always on her side. but this time??? no.

THERE WAS VALUABLE STUFF IN THERE. That was pure shock value. Because wdym we've been scrambling for answers for the past several books, and when Sophie stumbles upon a storehouse stock full of Neverseen stuff she just... burns it to the ground?? Like wasn't Gisela's Arche-something in there?

Sophie had no issue letting Alvar go for some info in regards to Keefe, but then she get's his mom's book of plans and BURNS IT???

And I get her thought process behind it was "The Neverseen has taken everything from me, so I'm going to take something from them. I'm tired of always sitting back and just reacting and never being proactive." I GET THAT. But burning the storehouse was SO not the moment lmao. She's also traumatized and the Neverseen is very triggering for her obviously, which means she doesn't always have the clearest thoughts in regards to it. But BOI-

I might just be an asshole. Idek.

I made a previous post talking about how unfair she was to Fitz when they were dating. It's buried in my blog somewhere. But she was not a saint in that situation (neither was he.) but just like Keefe, the narrative doesn't hold her nearly as accountable as it does when it comes to basically everyone else.

I don't hate her at all, but yeah idek. I'm tired lol

#Shannon is also propping her up into leadership roles #and while it is cool to see a character forced into a position that does not come naturally to them #anytime Sophie starts bossing everyone around it just comes off as posturing #and maybe it's SUPPOSED to?? #if it's supposed to #I can respect that immensely as a character choice #however you have lines from Keefe like “You're so cute when you're being all leaderly” #which leads me to believe Shannon wants me to think she's actually a natural born leader #but it's always been obvious to me that Sophie is a lot more reserved. She can lead a moral charge and all #and advocate for a cause. those are her character strengths #but she 100% works better when she's bouncing ideas off of other characters and not being 100% in charge #but that's just my opinion #kotlc #sophie foster crit