with the year coming to a close, i hope that anyone who's reflecting about how the year went remembers to be kind and fair to themselves with how you evaluate the year as a whole.
i think there are definitely times when life throws things that are... Not So Great at you. whether if it's some external circumstance that surprised you, or maybe your mentality wasn't at it's best. i wish for anyone who's encountered those kinds of challenges to be able to triumph over them and be able to say that they got through it.
heck, it might still be a work in progress even though you've kept chipping away at it, and that's ok! the results will show themselves eventually as you work through it! and i hope that we can all remember to be patient with ourselves as we go through these processes (learning, healing, etc.), because damn, it can be frustrating when you feel like you're "not there yet."
knowing that life can be rough at times, i think it's unfair to yourself (and others) to discount and downplay any progress you've made this year- whether if it's something that you did for the first time, or maybe you came to a new understanding and insight that you didn't have in the previous year.
it's not to say that you should undermine the validity of your experience with hardship, but to take the time to remind yourself what makes life worth living. to recall what moments were the most satisfying to you- and use it to strengthen your resolve for the next year and beyond. no amount of hardship will ever take away from the fact that you deserve to have hope that things will get better.
i hope that looking back on the year, you don't leave out the things you cherish. that you can remember the good that came this year. whether if the small victories are things like meeting someone new, trying something out for the first time, or making some strides in a long-term project/obligation...!
i wish everyone a happy new year! may it be prosperous, and that your life can move in a direction that's close to what you want out of life. you're all going to do great! remember to congratulate yourself for what you did well! despite everything, you're still here, and that's wonderful. never forget that!
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gomens trending again got me thinking about the parallels between aziraphale & crowley and of course the alltime faves warp & buzz... [SPOILER FREE POST]
idk its just! something ive been pondering is the structure of star command and its grabbag mix of peacekeeping / police / military / law enforcement functions and its ineffective & flawed structure and principles. even in blosc canon i think buzz is unquestioningly devoted to it because he is not, and has never been, directly opressed by, if i may call it that, the police state + he does believe that he as a space ranger works for the great good and general forces of justice... and yet! and yet he regularly goes against sc's rules and regulations on a whim! from disrespecting lives and privacy of perceived criminals (mocking, mind probing, other stuff i cant remember explicit examples for) to, on the other hand, not bringing them to justice or generally showing sympathy (looking at the ending of ancient evil of course, but also gravitina & millenial bugs bc ozma was breaking the law for sure there, no?). and he is also AWARE of how the system is not fair and "stacked against us" as shown in lone wolf! which makes me think he has some unexamined internal conflict about his job/calling--like aziraphale!!!
and on the other hand... sighs lovingly. and in the other corner we have warp who is obviously against star command (to what extent and based on what beliefs we unfortunately aren't shown) yet i think has never challenged its systems and operations openly, only subversively worked against em. maybe that's because in canon the whole time he had been a space ranger he was also secretly working against sc & for that reason he never cared enough to ever attempt to change sc or convince buzz they/he needed to change it ("convince buzz to do it" because buzz's a posterboy & the best & wrote actual RULEBOOK for star command--so he probably could've done a lot of improvements). and also for warp this whole star command thing was always just a job/cover so he wouldn't do all this hard unpaid work of Bringing On Systematic Changes that wouldn't benefit him immediately. BUT! imagine!!! if warp HAD to stick with the job--if he was forced to live and work under a fucked up rigorous unfair system encouraging blind obedience--as the angels and crowley had to!!--he wouldve rebelled SO FAST. punk demon warp + autism angel buzz for forever and a day!!!
so in conclusion in gomens/blosc crossover warp quits heaven day 1 and then after a lot of talking and questioning the established order of things and gomens-typical shenanigans buzz&warp must go from "a demon and an angel" to "two blokes fucking around" & go awol together married style. love wins?!
edit [STILL SPOILER-FREE]: i wrote this post before watching gomens season 2 and rereading/recontextualizing it now i keep thinking Wow. Did I Hit That Nail On The Head, especially with the buzz and aziraphale parallels. as i put it on twitter: "stubborn holier than thou autistic guy who genuinely believes the oppressive system hes working for is good and just" and "sexiest motherfucker on earth (who secretly cares)". the ending of s2 was almost a reversal of the buzz&warp main conflict which is DELICIOUS actually... with much more explicit gayness mixed in. fun! fun fun fun.
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Ok game time: Naegami Headcanons after the tragedy let’s go.
anon i am kissing you so sweetly for this one. under the cut bc i have MANY.
SO i don't see them getting together while at hope's peak pre-tragedy. maybe if the tragedy hadn't happened, something would have happened in their final year -- but togami has such a stick up his ass that i think that they would have juuust become real friends when the tragedy happened.
post-killing game, i think togami has. feelings for naegi that he doesn't recognize as such. he just thinks he's neat! i also always like to think of him as devoted to naegi to the point of comedy. hagakure is behind on his work? no mercy. naegi is behind on his work? "well i suppose i could stay late tonight and help you get through the backlog. do you want coffee?" he's whipped he just doesn't know it yet.
naegi, for his part, is really proud of how far togami has come since the beginning of the killing game/since their first days at hope's peak -- but i don't think he has romantic feelings for him until after he gets back from towa city.
SPEAKING of towa city and togami being freakishly devoted to naegi. the moment they find out that komaru is alive and being held captive, togami volunteers to lead the rescue operation. he justifies it as a way to settle the debt he owes to naegi for saving him in chapter 6, but really? he would have done it even if naegi wasn't the ultimate hope.
naegi doesn't take it well when togami is captured. obviously. not only does he have no idea where his sister is or if she made it out alive, now he's simultaneously dealing with the possibility that he may have just lost another friend to the tragedy (and, of course, he blames himself because it was his sister that togami ran out to save.) he... doesn't sleep much during UDG.
on the other hand, the relief he feels when togami is rescued and his sister is confirmed to be safe? he practically launches himself at togami when he gets back to headquarters, triggering a moment of Realization for both of them.
that said, i think both of them are really good at managing their priorities -- it's still the end of the world, after all -- so while they might feel Extremely awkward around each other during meals or around the office, when push comes to shove, they actually work together better than ever.
when naegi first approaches him and kirigiri with the idea for the neo world program, it wasn't even a question for togami. he believes in naegi (they all do) so when he says "hey lets commit treason" of COURSE he's in.
i think they get together while they're on jabberwock island. not while the killing game is happening, of course, but as they're setting up. they're all still so hopeful that this will work and they're (practically) alone on a beautiful island. awkward first kiss while they’re pulling an all-nighter before the system launches in the morning. a moment of hope before it all goes to absolute hell.
again, they’re very good about priorities. the minute killing game (2!) starts, they kind of silently agree to put things on hold until they can figure out wtf to do. it’s very tense and they share several charged moments where they’re *this* close to cracking under pressure.
shortly after sdr2 chapter 6, togami realizes that he’s full blown in love with naegi and has been for awhile. kirigiri is ready to kill him because she’s known the whole time (of course)
they don’t even really have time to recover/actually figure out their relationship because -- of course -- naegi is put on trial for treason and dr3 starts. turns out having a relationship in the middle of the apocalypse is difficult. togami has never been more afraid in his life, but he’s determined to get naegi out of there if he has to strangle munakata with his bare hands. naegi realizes he’s fully in love with togami the first time he sees his face once he’s out of the future foundation black site.
the reconstruction of hope’s peak is where they finally get to have an actual relationship, holy shit. meanwhile komaru and syo have been dating for like a year and a half, totally unbothered.
i’m a huge fan of the thh survivors sharing a living space because, as i’ve mentioned before, they aren’t great at functioning without the others nearby. shortly after the reconstruction of hope’s peak begins, naegi quietly moves into togami’s room. kirigiri notices right away, but it takes the others about a week to realize LMFAO.
once the reconstruction is finished and naegi and kirigiri are prepping to take on the incoming class, togami gives naegi the extremely normal anniversary gift of an entire fucking house. it’s... understated, given that togami was the one behind it.
the original plans he showed the other survivors (+ komaru lol) were much more extravagant, until asahina and komaru not-so-kindly pointed out that naegi is normal and probably doesn’t want a fuck off huge house.
(timeline here is about a year post dr3, three years since UDG, 4.5 years since the events of thh, and a whopping 6.5 years since they met at the original hope’s peak for the very first time)
8 years after they escape hope’s peak, togami decides he’s going to propose to naegi -- they’ve talked about it before, of course, but now that the world has finally started to really, truly recover from the tragedy, it feels more appropriate. he enlists asahina and komarus’ help in picking out the ring and obsessively plans out the perfect day/time/place.
when the day finally comes where he’s finally going to do it, naegi beats him to the punch with a simple-yet-sweet proposal over breakfast that morning. togami rapidly cycles between stunned to elated to furious that naegi beat him. he gets flustered and accidentally rejects the proposal before backtracking and having to admit that he wanted to be the one to propose, damn it!! they figure it out, eventually
their actual wedding is just a simple and sweet courthouse ceremony with kirigiri and komaru there as witnesses. once the news of their engagement got out, they were pretty immediately overwhelmed by attendance requests and, while togami is one for excessive ceremony and naegi loves his friends so much, they’re actually pretty private about their personal lives and ultimately decide to do one wedding that’s just for them before throwing the obligatory big party with everyone being invited (and, of course, media coverage bc, y’know. ultimate hope and the last surviving togami heir.)
i have SO many more thoughts about them/their domestic life but oh my fucking god this got way too long. sorry for liking a really really long slow burn LMFAO
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