#this post turned very long and rambly lol i just remember how much i like this 30year old book and also warps character arc<3

[warpolomewdarkmatter]

gomens trending again got me thinking about the parallels between aziraphale & crowley and of course the alltime faves warp & buzz... [SPOILER FREE POST]

idk its just! something ive been pondering is the structure of star command and its grabbag mix of peacekeeping / police / military / law enforcement functions and its ineffective & flawed structure and principles. even in blosc canon i think buzz is unquestioningly devoted to it because he is not, and has never been, directly opressed by, if i may call it that, the police state + he does believe that he as a space ranger works for the great good and general forces of justice... and yet! and yet he regularly goes against sc's rules and regulations on a whim! from disrespecting lives and privacy of perceived criminals (mocking, mind probing, other stuff i cant remember explicit examples for) to, on the other hand, not bringing them to justice or generally showing sympathy (looking at the ending of ancient evil of course, but also gravitina & millenial bugs bc ozma was breaking the law for sure there, no?). and he is also AWARE of how the system is not fair and "stacked against us" as shown in lone wolf! which makes me think he has some unexamined internal conflict about his job/calling--like aziraphale!!!

and on the other hand... sighs lovingly. and in the other corner we have warp who is obviously against star command (to what extent and based on what beliefs we unfortunately aren't shown) yet i think has never challenged its systems and operations openly, only subversively worked against em. maybe that's because in canon the whole time he had been a space ranger he was also secretly working against sc & for that reason he never cared enough to ever attempt to change sc or convince buzz they/he needed to change it ("convince buzz to do it" because buzz's a posterboy & the best & wrote actual RULEBOOK for star command--so he probably could've done a lot of improvements). and also for warp this whole star command thing was always just a job/cover so he wouldn't do all this hard unpaid work of Bringing On Systematic Changes that wouldn't benefit him immediately. BUT! imagine!!! if warp HAD to stick with the job--if he was forced to live and work under a fucked up rigorous unfair system encouraging blind obedience--as the angels and crowley had to!!--he wouldve rebelled SO FAST. punk demon warp + autism angel buzz for forever and a day!!!

so in conclusion in gomens/blosc crossover warp quits heaven day 1 and then after a lot of talking and questioning the established order of things and gomens-typical shenanigans buzz&warp must go from "a demon and an angel" to "two blokes fucking around" & go awol together married style. love wins?!

edit [STILL SPOILER-FREE]: i wrote this post before watching gomens season 2 and rereading/recontextualizing it now i keep thinking Wow. Did I Hit That Nail On The Head, especially with the buzz and aziraphale parallels. as i put it on twitter: "stubborn holier than thou autistic guy who genuinely believes the oppressive system hes working for is good and just" and "sexiest motherfucker on earth (who secretly cares)". the ending of s2 was almost a reversal of the buzz&warp main conflict which is DELICIOUS actually... with much more explicit gayness mixed in. fun! fun fun fun.

#shoutout to rangespacer with his BEAUTIFUL takes on buzz in general and the topic of starcommand specifically btw i should reblog those asap #this post turned very long and rambly lol i just remember how much i like this 30year old book and also warps character arc<3 #origpost #i think if canon warp ever came up to buzz and said Hey man ever think about how police and prisons are fucked up and what we do is harmful #buzz would either 1) [pre-tab] dismiss his concerns because buzzs bullheaded like that & believes in star command way too much #2) [post-tab] assume warp was being hypocritical/only saying that to improve the life of Evil Criminals--like HIMSELF apparently!!! #& apparently buzz cant trust ANYTHING!!! because his best friendship is apparently a lie!!! WORK MORE & NEVER QUESTION THINGS!!! #buzz + warp. greatest doomed relationship that never could happen because the 20 years of partnership have been spoiled from the beginning. #good job warp good job buzz. wish you two had had 4 thousand years to work your differences out <3...

[kfaem]

Love and Deepspace; when their S/O is a kpop idol

notes: brrr new fandom lets go. also yes i went MIA but hey im not like dead

the boys when MC is an idol :) this is self indulgent. im a zayne girlie but i got carried away with raf lol. im tired so this is unedited, poorly written, no structure, and kinda just rambling

Rafayel:

here me out

he was a fan for the longest time, creating multiple pieces based off of you and your likeness

you and your members go to one of his exhibitions and when you make eye contact he's immediately in love more than he was before

kinda in a weird way

but when you approach him first he's in shock and doesnt know what to do

after the initial talking period and when the relationship starts he acts like his normal self

attends every concert and fan meeting

spends hundreds of dollars on your albums, collecting your photocards and solo posters

brags about being your boyfriend on sns and your manager tries to get him to stop

thomas is so embarrassed everytime your manager reaches out and begs him to calm down cause its a bad image

doesnt care about the reporters, is willing to fight with elites over you and your reputation

he's a simp but is also kinda mean sometimes lol

is jealous when you go live and refuse to respond to him to at least an hour and makes his presence known in your chat

i find the image of the matching outfits, couples goals posts on sns, and articles where he names you his muse to just be so <3333

Xavier

You guys bumped into each other at a convenience store, both reaching for the same bag of chips

both flustered with red cheeks, you let him have it and apologized

awkward

so, so very awkward

both of you are stuck in a awkward, silent encounter and neither of you want to say anything

one of your members comes over to see whats taking you so long and realizes that you're in a standoff with a cute blond and decides to play cupid

it worked

you two end up becoming good friends, and then eventually some sort of situationship

he doesnt want to damage your career and acknowledges that you both dont have time to spend with each other

but still acts as a loving boyfriend, buying your albums, concert tickets, merch, birthday specials etc.

then when you guys go on a snack run, a reporter recognizes you and within the week you're caught up in dating rumours

deciding that you guys couldnt avoid the truth, the situationship turned into a real relationship

doesnt really make a big deal out of your relationship or your popularity. would rather spend your guys' spare time reading together, watching movies, eating good food and relaxing

the media eventually forgets but the fans dont

they love every piece of media that ever gets showed, glimpses of xavier in mirrors, reflections on water, glasses, windows. mentions of a lover in interviews when asked what inspired you

just a loving boyfriend who tries to give you a sense of normalcy outside of the flashing lights

Zayne

Childhood friends

he hates your career and how much soul it has taken from you, but also acknowledges that you love what you do and are willing to risk your health and privacy

zayne is the king of situationship lmao

dates all the time, dinners at small restaurants hiding in booths in the far corners since you both like to be alone, together

your members genuinely dont understand how hes "not your boyfriend"

has lingered on music video shoots, using his title as your personal doctor to not raise any eyebrows

doesnt go out of his way to buy your albums but... if hes at a corner store and sees it, he'll buy it. or two. or three.

keeps one of your photocards and a normal picture of you in his wallet, grayson found it on the floor in his office once after it fell out of his wallet and he could never live it down

the entire hospital staff knows but wouldnt say anything for fear of their life

always sending messages no matter what side of the world youre on. Please remember to eat, drink water, and rest as much as you can. Too much strain on your body can cause long-term side effects.

buys tickets to your concerts, trying to hold back his smile as you glow on the stage while performing in front of your many fans

yeah he gets jealous

wont say it

and you can barely tell

but the chill that fills the room when another idol hugs you and is being overly touchy is so very much obvious and has people rushing to do something else

a reporter approaches him and tries to ask about your dating life. he shuts them up with a glare. the reporter doesnt even dare publishing that article.

your fans have a basic idea of what zayne is to you, but they respect you enough to not make a scene of it.

then one of your members gets drunk on a live and asks about your boyfriend and it comes unravelled

you post a picture with him, captioned with a heart, and its never brought up again

has brought your fans food and drinks whenever they set up cafe events for support

he appreciates everything that your fans do for you and has asked them to take care of you when hes not around

your relationship is never actually made official but yall live together when you arent required to be at the dorms and own like two cats so idk

still the caregiver that we love

#love and deepspace #love and deepspace zayne #love and deepspace rafayel #love and deepspace xavier #lads rafayel #lads zayne #lads xavier #loveanddeepspace

[quin-ns]

High Infidelity (JJ Maybank x Reader, Rafe Cameron x Reader)

Word count: 1K

Summary: after spending time in secret with JJ, you go home to rafe

Tags: happy times with JJ, not so happy times with rafe, cheating (or should I say infidelity), kissing, very minor amount of smut (with JJ), fluff, angst, lying, arguing

Request: “Another swiftie into obx omg hi!! For the song requests, can I ask for high infidelity where the reader is sneaking around with jj while rafe is her boyfriend?? Thx!!”

A/N: I asked for obx prompts based on taylor swift songs and ended writing this in ab 30 minutes (not including editing lol) bc I love that song and the ~drama- of it so much. just based on the song, not a songfic

cross-posted to ao3 • obx masterlist • main masterlist

You felt so alive with JJ.

Whether it was just hanging out and having fun, or things getting hot and heavy (and having fun), you were happiest with him.

Right now, the two of you were drinking on a secluded spot on the beach, sitting side by side, laughing together as you watched the sunset.

His arm was around your waist, holding you against him. His smile was so bright as he rambled off some story that amused the both of you.

“You’re ridiculous,” you told him lightly, turning your head to face him.

JJ mirrored you and grinned. His eyes flicked to your lips before he said, “Maybe, but you love me anyway.”

He was right, you did.

He leaned in to kiss you then, those perfect lips of his capturing yours.

You wanted to stay in this moment forever, you couldn’t remember the last time you’d felt so loved and so free.

Things started to escalate, the kiss becoming more heated and both of you responded to the want you felt. You ended up stripped of your clothes beneath him, his body moving on top of you, and those gorgeous blue eyes staring into yours with such awe as you both became overwhelmed with pleasure.

You wished that’s how your night would’ve ended. The two of you together on the beach, not a care in the world, only focused on one another.

With JJ, things were so uncomplicated.

It was long past sunset when you finally decided it was time to go. You reluctantly left one another, but not before making plans to see each other soon. He even kissed you goodbye, and you thought about it the whole way home.

When you got home, you were reminded of how complicated it actually was.

It wasn’t hard to sneak into Tannyhill, they sometimes forgot to lock the back door.

Unfortunately, the door led right to the kitchen where your boyfriend was waiting.

Of course he was. He barely said a word to you today, but now that you hadn’t been home he was waiting up just for you.

How romantic.

You should’ve just walked passed, if you had you could’ve avoided him, but you were still tipsy and really, really needed water.

Plus, you figured he’d just catch up to you anyway. You shared a bedroom, it’s not like you could kick him out. You didn’t exactly have anywhere else to go, either.

“Hey,” you greeted casually, but you couldn’t quite meet his eye as you walked to the fridge. “Shouldn’t you be asleep?”

Rafe was sitting at the counter, watching you with an angry look. You knew it wasn’t just because you slurred your words ever so slightly.

“Have fun with Sarah?” he asked, not bothering to even look back to see if she was behind you.

That had been the lie you told him. She had mentioned having late night plans with John B, so you figured if she would be gone too, might as well use her as an alibi.

“Yeah, I needed a girls night.”

It used to bother you when you lied to Rafe, but not so much anymore. That probably should’ve bothered you as well, but it didn’t. You did it with such ease now.

You grabbed the water pitcher from the fridge and a cup down from the shelf. You went to the counter and stood across from him.

You forced a smile as you poured yourself a glass of water, but Rafe’s expression didn’t soften.

“That’s funny, because I saw Sarah come back over an hour ago,” he revealed. “She had no idea where you were.”

You set the pitcher down, feeling completely sober all of the sudden. The thud of it against the counter was the only noise to fill the uncomfortable silence.

“She left early,” you countered with a shrug. You grabbed the cup and sipped at the water, trying to avoid eye contact.

“That’s six nights in the past two weeks,” Rafe noted.

You turned your back on him to go put the pitcher back in the fridge.

“What?”

“Six nights in the past two weeks that you’ve come back late, and now I’m thinking you’re not spending them where you say you are.”

You furrowed your brows and slammed the door. You turned and looked back at him. You couldn’t quite read the look on his face. It was something between smug that he’d finally caught you in a lie, and pissed that you’d been lying.

“You’re keeping count?”

“You’re my girlfriend and freeloading at my house, so yeah, I notice when you’re gone,” he sneered.

You wondered what happened to the Rafe that made you smile and laugh. Now he just made you feel small and brought a frown to your face.

JJ made you smile and laugh all the time.

“Where were you?” Rafe interrogated, standing from his seat.

You watched wordlessly as he made his way around the counter to stand in front of you.

You swallowed, but looked up at him dead in the eye. Maybe he wanted to know, but he didn’t need to know. You’d bent the truth too far and he wasn’t going to accept you dancing around it anymore.

Your relationship was dying, and you felt like you were dying on the inside.

“Do you really wanna know where I was?”

But you still loved him. It was sad, but true. As you stared at Rafe, your own question lingering in the air as he waited for an answer, you couldn’t bring yourself to tell him how JJ had brought you back to life.

Your shoulders sagged, defeated by your own inner turmoil. Your expression softened, even as he stared down at you, waiting impatiently.

You shook your head a little to yourself and broke away from his gaze.

“I was out with friends,” you said, brushing past him.

You needed to shower, to rid your body of any evidence before you went to the bed you shared with him.

You had a feeling this was the last straw, but when Rafe watched you walk away without a word, you wondered if that’s what he’d rather believe.

Laying beside him and trying to sleep peacefully was going to be awkward, if not a struggle. But on the bright side, at least you’d be seeing JJ again soon.

#jj maybank x reader #jj maybank x you #jj maybank #rafe cameron x reader #rafe cameron x you #rafe cameron #outer banks #obx #request #quin-ns writing

[gilded-fern]

Hi! I love your Kratos posts there isn’t enough content on here about him!! This isn’t really a request but more of an idea (if you want to take up on it ofc) but i absolutely loved your relationship rambles on Kratos so I loved to here your rambles and thoughts on if you think he’d ever have any more children and what he’d be like with more kids. Honestly I see Kratos with a big family and the thought of Atreus having siblings is 🥺

Kratos x Reader Family Ramblings

A/N: Ngl the thought of having a family irl freaks me out, but in fiction its so appealing lmao. If any of you want to send rambling/fic ideas feel free! Also this is all over the place, i was just writing lol.

Reader is implied female, mentions of pregnancy

Word Count: 510

Warnings: None

Upon first glance at the towering spartan, your thoughts would be somewhere along the lines of “intimidating, scary, stoic…”. To a stranger it is hard to imagine someone as cold as Kratos would even want a family. But in reality, it's something the man longs for.

To start a family with you however, will force Kratos to face the pain and trauma he’s forced down. The fact he murdered his first family, and his harsh treatment of Atreus when he was a young boy. A big fear of Kratos is turning out like his own father, being cruel and vindictive with little to no care for others. But in your eyes, Kratos is the kindest man you have met. You’ve seen how he interacts with others, the underlying gentleness in the spartan when he interacts with Atreus. How his eyes will worriedly flicker to you every so often just to make sure you’re ok. You think Kratos is nothing like his father.

But give the poor man some time, as seen before with Atreus when he was very young, Kratos doesn’t always have the… healthiest ways of dealing with inner turmoil. Trips off to the forest to clear his mind will be quite frequent, sometimes you join him but majority of the time you do not.

After the initial fear, Kratos would be delighted to raise a large family with you (Or a small one! If that's what you want of course, Kratos is just happy to be with you). Kratos does quite like the pregnant look on you, it makes him happy seeing you trust him so much to raise children with him.

In terms of a big family I like to think somehow you would end up with 4 kids, 3 older boys and the youngest being a girl. When you give birth to your daughter, Kratos is more choked up out of all his children’s births. Holding a little girl in his arms again makes him remember how he failed Calliope. Father protectiveness to the max with her, it’ll be hard for her to find a future partner.

Generally speaking, Kratos' way of raising children is still a little harsh. He wants them to be capable and to be able to pull their own weight. But not to worry, it's nothing traumatizing. Daily sparring exists, and once your daughter is old enough to join in so do you. Although sparring sessions with you and Kratos are much more lighthearted and silly than your childrens.

Atreus would be overjoyed with his new siblings, on his visits home you can often see him roughhousing with the boys and teaching your daughter self defense, even though Kratos has done this a million times now.

Your family will be full of love, some days will be harder than others. Kratos won’t just be able to remove all of his struggles from his memory. There will be arguments, but you and Kratos will persevere. These arguments consist of disagreements on parenting techniques or Kratos’s awful habit to shut people out at times.

#kratos x reader #kratos #reader insert #gow ragnarok #gow reader insert

[nabbit-unmasked]

Hey! I am most likely one of the China placekins you've heard before. I reached out on Reddit but I'm pretty sure r/otherkin restricts new users or something. I was so excited to finally know of someone who is both a country AND objectum for another country!!

Excuse some awkwardness here and there. I just wanna rant about being countrykin. It's so awesome to meet you CAR!

I am personally objectum for the USA (she/xe/purr/it) and I introduced my bf to that as well (we're both otherkin.) We wish you and The Gambia the absolute best! The post with the hearts you made with her is my fave.

I have some very strong thoughts on the controversy of being countrykin/placekin, especially since I believe my alterhumanity originates from trauma (not copinglink though) and being China gives me so much strength, physical and mental, and the power inherent of being a giant physical and conceptual entity is so freeing.

It's one thing to be connected specifically to countries/concepts specifically connected to one brutal regime/etc., but as an Asian guy with Chinese descent, it just feels gross and even racist to an extent. I am so much more than my government. I am the mountains that touch the sky, the rivers of life that color the soil yellow, the love and hearts of a billion people, the endurance of a long history, the strength of my flora and fauna. Same with being the CAR. There will always be issues within a place that exists in our physical reality. But we are more than the sum of our parts.

I am just so glad to have another countrykin here. It feels really isolating sometimes. Especially when my kin has affected my identity so much, including my chosen name down to my favorite colors and how I choose to curate my room.

So I am here to say... Please. PLEASE talk, discuss, ramble, vent, rant more about being the CAR. You are awesome. I connect with it so much.

Love from China 🇨🇳 ❤ 🇨🇫

Hey! So, as it turns out, I didn't meet 2 China placekins, and it's just a coincidence that we've found each other twice on the expanse of the internet! You're the only one lol. Also, I do remember you from reddit :3

I've actually talked to Gold before and he mentioned you. He and said that you might have talked to me in the past, so I'm glad we could meet again! I was super excited when I saw you in my notes :)

Thank you so much for the kind words towards me and The Gambia!! We're doing well and appreciate your wishes :) I wish the same for you and the USA and whatever other objects/things you and Tank are loving on ^^

I feel the same way about the whole placekin controversy thing and I couldn't have said it better myself. While man-made things are important to mankind, we are so much more than that. My identity is not human and has nothing to do with being human. I am a place who's human aspects are ran by humans, but that is only one part of me. There are many, many non-human aspects that make me...me. All of my life and non-life share me, a nonhuman entity.

I will continue to speak for myself and other placekin: that's why I made this blog! I couldn't find any other (active) placekin accounts that spoke out about us. Our community was in the shadows and pretty much unknown to the world, so someone had to be a voice for us. Not to from egotistical, but this blog brought placekin together, educated others on who we are, and even allowed others to discover that they were placekin themselves. I'm here to tell the world that we're here.

Happy to meet with you again, China.

Much love 🇨🇫 ❤ 🇨🇳 /p

#ask response #CARstuff🇨🇫 #placekin #china placekin #🇨🇫❤🇨🇳/p #objectum #alterhuman #otherkin #placeum #chinakin #country objectum #conceptum #CAR placekin #therian community #otherkin community #alterhuman community

[clara-aeri]

Love how you handled the different Zeldas in your Advent fic. And how you write Link in Rootsverse, it's exactly how I see him in this era. Do you have any thoughts about the other Links in other games? How they compare/contrast with botw/totk's Link?

Oh thank you!! 😊 Glad to hear that!!!

Boy do I have thoughts.

I guess- I should say that the way I wrote Link in Roots is definitely not how I’d imagine him to be in cannon. If only because I feel Nintendo values the self-insert aspect of the Zelda games too much to let the character stray very far from the “stoic hero” archetype. If anything, the Link I wrote in Undertow is the most similar to how I’d imagine his canon self to be- largely just due to how he doesn’t outright reject his responsibilities (pre calamity at least. I do subscribe to the idea that he’s much louder and funnier after losing his memories).

Agh- but anyway lol see my rambling below.

Starting with Ocarina of Time (OoT), that version of Link is definitely sadder than the others. He had a pretty good childhood, but his adult life fell apart in much more profound ways than the others’. He’d be as quiet as pre calamity botw Link. There might be a hint of the mischievous fairy kid still left in him, but very little. Lots of longing and disillusioned feelings that would maybe be best replicated in pre calamity Botw Link, yeah?

As for Twilight Princess (TP) Link, he’s a country guy 110%. I imagine he’d be too restless to go back to farming though- not after the world got so big. I assume he’d be a great guy to talk to, best with kids/animals, probably one of the most well adjusted after all his trials and a good pen pal to Zelda. He wouldn’t be as lively after losing Midna, definitely, but he’s doing leagues better than OoT Link. Probably has a much more dry, sarcastic sense of humor than Botw Link’s “He has a dumb belly” absurdist comedy.

Wind Waker (WW) Link- at a glance I’d almost say he’d get along with Botw Link, but after more thought I think WW Link would despise him. Botw Link would willingly eat rocks or stuff himself in an explosive barrel for jokes, but WW Link would either have to be tricked or forced into it. He seems… high anxiety. But also irritable. He has the most common sense out of all the Links and that is probably exactly what his problem is. I don’t know why, but I get the feeling that most animals would attack WW Link on sight because of his constant bad, exasperated energy.

As for Skyward Sword— lol I think he’s so funny. I think growing up with Zelda “the Goddess turned teenage girl” would have had an impact on him. By far he is the most stable, most extroverted version of Link, but I think there’s something about him that would make him unknowable. He’s so relaxed but upbeat at the same time, seems like he’s always up to something but nobody ever knows what since he’s always asleep. He doesn’t have a thought in his head but he’s so perceptive too just- he’s just odd. But cool. Botw Link’s extreme stoicism pre calamity and crazy behavior post calamity would both stand out a lot next to SS Link. Yet his relationship with Botw Zelda most closely resembles SS Link’s with his own.

I’m not very familiar with the other 3DS Links etc so I can’t say much about them. These are also the vibes I get from how I remember all these Links after 10 years of not playing their games, so I could be wrong in how I’ve described them for sure.

Lol either way thank you for asking! I was a fun question to think about! It makes me want to write a reverse Advent featuring all of them ugh 😭😂

#claraaeri #botw fanfiction #anon asks #ao3fic #the legend of zelda #botw #zelink #totk #twilight princess #ocarina of time #wind waker #skyward sword

[asksds]

Part 1 | Next

Previous events

((This page was pretty much exclusively asset-flipping from the Clip Studio Asset Store. Materials used: City | Sky | Rain, the latter two get regular use across the entire thing.))

((MOM HOLY FUCK it's finally here!! I'll ramble a bit about it under a Readmore - but this one is 17 pages so more than 2 weeks of updates to look forward to! Yay! Return back to regular asks is nearing!))

((This really was such a particular roadblock for me and I think I have pinpointed 2 big reasons as to why it took THIS long:

I'd been thinking about it and layouting it in my head previously for years pretty much, and if you're an artist you know that overblown expectations like that can rarely be met by reality. Not getting to execute it like I imagined was a little frustrating so that made it harder to work on it

Turns out I was just helplessly overworked/kinda burned out from my job lol. The only time I could really get down to work on this was when I had any longer vacation, and we had a gigantic project at work spanning like 2-3 years that really went into overdrive last year with me pulling 10-hour-days for months basically. That left me no time and energy to really do anything else in the evening, and I'm pretty sure that impacted me until now since I could only finish this entire thing when I had another vacation and finally like...felt relaxed enough to draw?? and have fun doing it?? and have IDEAS?? It felt like I hadn't had ideas or motivation in years so that was a nice surprise, but also abolish jobs man I just wanna draw OCs and their shenanigans...

I'm really glad it's done, it did contribute to my posting anxiety to be honest where I felt bad posting anything because in my head I was like :( People will get mad if I do something else instead of work on this (ridiculous but you know how brains get. Like mate I drew a bunch of things for con prep and got too guilty to post any of it aaah) + for dramatic effect I didn't want to spam too many other asks inbetween which is why that grinded to a halt. Either way, it's done, it might not be perfect, it might show that it has spanned a very long time via some style changes between panels but what matters is that it's finished and I'm happy with it! If you read this (kudos) hope you enjoy, hope you have a great day and upcoming week, stay safe and hydrated in this hellweather, and remember the joy of creation because it's what makes life worth living!!))

#envy arc #comic

[whysamwhy123]

✨Fic Writing Review 2023✨

Tagged by the wonderful dynamic duo that is @aerodaltonimperial and @perhapswhoknowsvamp and it's very fitting that those two lovely people tagged me because they're a big reason why I wrote much of anything this year! Took me a while to get this done because I wanted to get my last fic of the year out the door first. I'll put the rest below the cut, and fair warning - it's loooooong. This bitch doesn't shut up, so I rambled on. A lot.

Words and Fics

76, 222 words published on AO3 in 2023

15 fics published on AO3 (16 if you count that one kinkmeme prompt I filled and posted anonymously)

2 little tumblr ficlets

Top 3 by Kudos

Voice in the Dark - Hookhausen (not super surprising, considering it was a popular pairing at the time, and it was the fic I wrote for the anniversary event)

Kids These Days And Their Darn Phones - Hookhausen

Half Your Age Plus Seven - OrangeHook (I continue to be incredibly surprised how well this fic did, like...huh?!)

Top 3 by Hits

Voice in the Dark - Hookhausen

Voice in the Dark, Part Two - Hookhausen (how fitting, LOL)

Half Your Age Plus Seven - OrangeHook (Seriously, what was it about this fic that drew people in? More so than any of my other OrangeHook fics? Like, I'm grateful and all but also confused, like this fic is way too long?! And weird about the age difference?!)

Author's Favourite

As much as I'm loving writing OrangeHook now, I think Voice in the Dark, Part Two is probably the best thing I've written? Even though it's also overly long and gets weird at the end (very much did not expect it to go in that direction when I started writing it), I'm actually pretty proud of how that one turned out. I had a clear vision in my head for how each scene would play out and what I wanted to get across, and man, I remember how most of the Hook/Evilhausen dialogue popped into my brain late one night when I couldn't sleep, so I spat it out into a doc and then about a month later when I actually wrote the scene, I don't think I changed a single word? I just added everything else around it, all the not-dialogue parts. And it was just a lot of fun getting to carry on that story, especially as someone who hasn't managed to crank out a proper multi-chapter fic yet. Who knows, maybe I'll return to that world someday...

Fandom Events in 2023

Uh, well, I guess I did the whole Hookhausen Anniversary thing? And...that's about it. I'm pretty disconnected from the fandom at large, whoopsie daisy 😬

Upcoming Projects

Hoo boy.

I have over 5k words of a Ricky/Christian Sugar Baby AU thing written already. I haven't posted it because it kinda needs some smut and that's still not something I can really do. I might post it someday, if I can make something work, or alternatively do what I normally do and put an annoying fade to black in there. Or maybe I'll think better of it and never post it because it's very self-indulgent and I highly doubt anyone else would really be interested or want me to continue it or anything. But I have Ideas for it...so many ideas...

Also, in my ill-fated quest to try and make myself write smut, I kinda started a Ricky/Bill championship celebration fic. Maybe I'll revisit that? Try to get it done?

And then there's that one fic I really want to work on, but have barely started. I've vague-posted about it here before - it's an incredibly fucked-up Dead Dove fic about Daniel Garcia and a Very Bad, Not-Good thing that happens to him, and the subsequent complete mental breakdown that follows. I've had the idea rattling around in my brain for the better part of a year at this point, despite not making much actual progress on it. Every time I think about it though, I have new ideas for scenes or dialogue. I'd like to make it work, but I don't know if I have the writing chops to handle it, plus it would probably end up being super long and nobody would want to read it, so it'd feel like a huge waste of time on my part? And I've had the idea for so long, it's out-dated too. But still, the urge remains...

Oh, and I still have a ton of OrangeHook ideas I'd like to make happen. Some are, of course, about their age difference. Some would (ideally) involve smut. And others... *nervous laughter* Others would likely result in an ''Everyone disliked that'' situation...

Writing Reflection

I was thinking about making a sappy post about this and whoops, here's my excuse! I don't talk a lot on here about my tragic backstory because honestly, who cares? But I will say this - before January of this year, I hadn't written a word of anything in years. Fic or otherwise. I used to love writing, but Stuff Happened and it killed all enjoyment I got out of it, and I thought that's how it would be forever. Then, for reasons I can't even remember, I started reading fic again, specifically in this wild little fandom of ours, and y'all are just so talented that it made my untalented ass want to give it another shot. So...I did.

I remember when I posted my first fic in ages back in January, I thought ''Maybe about three people will read this and no one will leave a comment or anything, but whatever, I wrote a thing and that's something I haven't done in years so that's enough for me!'' And to be honest, I still think that whenever I post stuff now? It's crazy to me that anyone actually reads my stuff and gets some kind of kick out of it. But every kudos and comment floors me and brings me so much joy, I can't even express it properly. I have to say a huge thank you to anyone who's ever read one of my fics, left kudos or dropped a comment. Whoever and wherever you are, you made my day!

And look, I ain't delusional. I know that calling myself a small fish in the fandom would be too generous. But I'm fine with that - because I'm genuinely enjoying writing again and that's what matters most to me. Even though I've also rediscovered how stressful writing can be (🙂🙂🙂) when it comes down to it, there's joy and happiness in my life that wasn't there last year and that's all because I started writing again. And because some lovely folks here decided to let me know they liked what I was throwing out there. The years have not been kind to ol' Sammy Sam-Sam and this year was no exception, but getting to forget about all that shit and write my silly little wrestling fanfiction has been a great distraction and a comfort through this whole year.

So...yeah. Thanks to everyone who's ever commented on my writing, thanks to the folks who follow me on here (I don't know how you manage that though, I'm such an annoying bitch, aren't you sick of me yet?) and thanks to anyone who I've had the chance to chat with about writing and ships and whatever silly little ideas pop into my head (any of y'all feel free to message me at any time, I am always down to blab about whatever blorbos/ideas take your fancy). I'm hoping I can keep this train a-rollin' a little more next year. Still thinking back to when I started writing again, I made my new AO3 account expecting to write Dustjim only, but then I quickly decided I couldn't write those two well enough, and since then I've bounced around a bunch of different pairings, with a few rarepairs shoved in between for good measure. God only knows where my head will be at this time next year, LOL. I'd love to finally be able to attempt some of the bigger ideas I've been cooking up for a while now. Maybe I'll even write a proper multi-chapter fic? We'll see, but this bitch can dream, at least.

Rules:

Feel free to show whatever stats you have. Only want to show Ao3 stats? Rock on. Want to include some quantitative info instead of stats? Please do this. Want to change how yours is presented? Absolutely do that. Would rather eat glass than do this? Please do eat glass, I’ve heard it’s good for your gums.

I'm not going to tag anyone because I'm pretty sure everyone I know who writes has already been tagged? So if you're reading this and you haven't, go ahead and do it! By which I mean, eat glass. Eat all the glass that you want. Accidents happen in the dark.

#What is wrong with you Sam you should not be allowed to write #Also you really need to learn to shut up dude #This bitch went onnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnnn and on #But it was kinda fun reflecting on The Year I Got Back Into Writing #It's been fun yo #Who knows what this next year will bring??

[minecraft-sideblog-tm]

(this ended up being a very long post where I ramble about some lore in my solo world lol)

I added this right after bamboo wood was first added and I went around finding places I could add it to builds. Still lowkey one of my favorite little details in a build like Idk it just looks really nice to me lol

(don't mind the mumbo jumbo video playing in the top corner lol) I also don't think I ever posted the bamboo farm/ancient plant room I added to the underground plant lab a while back. So here's that!

Oh!! And I also don't remember if I ever posted the condemned sculk lab I made either! Actually I might have posted about it, but I don't think I really went into detail and it's been a while anyway lol, so here's that too.

This is really rambly, so- *inhales*

It's connected to a little hallway in the secret nether lab.

The lore is like this person already had a secret lab to study nether plants and whatnot without the villagers knowing. (Like, the nether is public knowledge and avoided due to how dangerous it is, so they wanted to keep the extensive study a secret as to not freak out the villagers)

((the only reason it's "public knowledge" is a meta thing because I already have a very obvious nether portal room and couldn't fit that into the secret lab lore unless it was like Oh yeahh that place? so risky and SO dangerous, and we never go there......unless? 👀 lmao))

While exploring far away they discover sculk deep underground. It's vaguely plant-like, or at least it unsettlingly seems like it's alive, and their Whole Thing is studying plants so they decided to take samples to study.

The sculk must be as ancient as the city, obviously causing the city's decay. And while it was clearly still spreading through the ruins it was doing so VERY slowly. At least, that was the assumption based on how little of the city had been covered in the seemingly hundreds or thousands of years since it must have abandoned.

Foreshadowing is a literay device used to-

Back at home, they decide to add a small room to the existing secret lab. They connect it to a small hallway off the main hallway, rather than building directly off the main hallway, because they were afraid the heat from the nether plant grow rooms might be too much and inhibit the growth of the sculk. Putting a bit of distance between the heat source and the sculk lab might promote better growth and therefore better research!

Foreshadowing is a literary devic-

.....

*ahem*

Anyway, turns out they were very, very wrong. The sculk is MUCH newer than the cities, only overtaking them long after they fell to ruin and, therefore, grows much faster than expected. Maybe even accelerated by the fresher air this high up (this lab is around Y-level 41), and the high heat from the nearby grow rooms.

The lab is quickly overtaken and subsequently sealed off (there are three doors with glass walls between the hall and the room itself). While the assumption is that no one else will ever find any of this secret lab, the sculk seems so dangerous that they had to put a warning on the hall. Should someone ever discover the lab, it wouldn't be right to let them unknowingly walk into the sculk.

(that part was inspired by me watching a video that mentioned scientists having to think about how to label stuff like nuclear waste in such a way to convey the danger of opening it to people potentially FAR in the future when our languages may be long dead or certain icons might have entirely different/unknown meanings and I can't even remember the video now but oh my god that's just so fascinating and terrifying to me, *inhales* ANYWAY back to minecraft)

Tried to use armor trims to make a weird hazmat-esque suit. I feel like it looks a little silly, but I like the concept so I kept it. Also since the compass over the door is always spinning I like to imagine it's some sort of Geiger counter for sculk

Combo of empty chiseled bookshelves and placing normal ones around until I found the spots with neutral/empty texture variations in the texture pack I use to make it feel quickly abandoned.

Then I tried to make the room feel unfinished too. Like maybe they'd just barely gotten it built and created a seemingly safe containment area for the sculk first thing so they could observe it. Sculk starts to spread outside of the containment, they try and fail to stop it from doing so, and they take their notes and seal off the room before it's finished.

I also wanted it to seem like the sculk was degrading the floor, causing it to sink. Maybe sculk just thrives further down so it's naturally growing that direction, maybe it's vaguely sentient and purposefully trying to bury itself deeper, maybe the floor material is just weaker and/or closer to where it broke out of the containment so it's just the most affected. You decide!

They've done there best to not let any of the dangerous research slip to the villagers they live with, as to not worry them when the situation is definitely totally contained. However, one day a path above ground collapses and reveals a small pond with a....strange ecosystem. They aren't sure the villagers will believe it's just algae if they ever see it....

it was entirely unintentional but this pond is actually almost directly above the blue nether plant room, so that's neat! Also this pond was naturally here, and I had decorated it like this (minus the sculk) and added a broken path long before building the nether lab or before sculk was in the game. Then much later I had the idea for a condemned sculk lab and thought oh hey! New pond lore!

The original weird pond lore was that every time I harvested potatoes I'd throw the poisonous ones in there, so eventually the water just Did Things. And I still like that idea because it's silly so maybe it's just a mix of both now lol

Anyway that's enough rambling about my solo minecraft lore because I've been rotating it in my head for months and just needed someone else to know. If you read this long I hope you enjoyed it and also thanks lol

#lee speaks #stuff i built #minecraft

[professor-rye]

10, 20, 30, 40 for the weird writer asks!

Thank you for sending me some questions! Apologies in advance for how much I ended up rambling 😅

10. Has a piece of writing ever “haunted” you? Has your own writing haunted you? What does that mean to you?

Oh gosh. Definitely Dapple. I was worried that I wouldn’t finish the very beginning idea I had (which ended up just being act 1), so I’m sure you can imagine my surprise when not only did I finish that, but then it kept going… and going… *and going.* I’ve always been good at coming up with ideas for long fics, but never before (or since) have I ever been able to actually *stick* with writing them, let alone so consistently. For some reason, for Dapple, my ADHD brain said “This is your life now and you are addicted”. It literally was what kept me on this earth for a while there. It unironically saved my life. And then it just… disappeared. 

My brain no longer wanted to think about it, and it was only habit keeping me going for a while there. I pushed past that point way too far and got burnt out, and I’m still waiting, desperately hoping, that the floodgates will open again. And not just because I want to finish it, mind you. Like I said, writing and posting dapple did so much good for me. It was a safe harbor in a storm. It helped me process some of the worst traumas in my life. It got me *so many friends*. I can not express enough how much I miss it. …. Gods, okay, that got way deeper than I intended. Apologies! Gods… well uh, on to the next question!

20. If a witch offered you the choice between eternal happiness with your one true love and the ability to finally finish, perfect, and publish your dearest, darlingest, most precious WIP in exactly the way you've always imagined it — which would you choose? You can’t have both sorry, life’s a bitch

Well, after the last question, I think the answer is probably obvious lol. No question at all, I would pick to perfectly finish Dapple (Gods, and if that also let me get the sequel idea I had as well?? And also all the side fics??? Shit I would sell my soul for that). (It also doesn’t help that I am ace and have trouble contemplating the idea of magically gifted eternal happiness, so like… it was just very stacked in Dapple’s favor already)

30. Talk to me about the role dreams play in your writing life. Have you ever used material from your dreams in your writing? Have you ever written in a dream? Did you remember it when you woke up?

So, its kind of complicated? I am very much so that writer who just daydreams about fic ideas as I lay down to sleep every night, so there is a very hazy period during the in between where sometimes I’ll get ideas that I can actually remember the next morning.

But I don’t think they’re actual dreams, because my normal dreams tend to be a) incredibly stressful and b) about the most boring stuff imaginable, which is quite the combo. 

But I will say that the pre-sleep daydreaming feels so different from any other actual plotting that I do. It’s very… gods, how do you describe this… 

There’s a thing I learned in art school where you step away from your composition and squint till you can only see the hazy outlines of the different elements of the work. Or like when they tell you to turn the painting upside down for a bit to see what isn’t working. The pre-sleep daydreaming always involves reimagining the scenes I had already thought about during more lucid moments, but looking at the broader strokes and the pure emotion of it (because sleepy). 

So most of the “ideas” I got from those moments were realizations that certain elements didn’t quite work the way I wanted them to, and then once I was actually lucid, I could think back on it and then (sometimes) realize a better way to handle that particular part. 

So… yeah? It’s hard to say if that counts as dreams specifically, but it’s also a really big part of my writing… existence? Process feels weird to say there lol. But yeah, it felt relevant to share. 

Gods, I’m rambling again. Last question! 

40. Please share a poem with me, I need it.

(not me taking several days to find this poem because my memory is terrible and I kept mixing up the line I was searching)

If you suddenly and unexpectedly feel joy, don’t hesitate. Give in to it. There are plenty of lives and whole towns destroyed or about to be. We are not wise, and not very often kind. And much can never be redeemed. Still, life has some possibility left. Perhaps this is its way of fighting back, that sometimes something happens better than all the riches or power in the world. It could be anything, but very likely you notice it in the instant when love begins. Anyway, that’s often the case. Anyway, whatever it is, don’t be afraid of its plenty. Joy is not made to be a crumb. ~ Mary Oliver

So yeah, if anyone else wants to send questions, here is the original question list post thingy. I will try not to ramble quite so much next time 😅

#my writing #writer ask game #dappled shadow and penumbral light #fan fiction writing

[wickedmoonlite]

KinnPorsche Rewatch 2023

Reminder: as we go into heavier topics in KP (dub-con/non-con, toxic behaviors, etc.), I will not be doing deep dives. I'm planning on taking this just below surface value as these are literally thoughts I have in the moment as I'm watching. Thank you.

Episode 6 Random Thoughts

FOREST EPISODE FOREST EPISODE FOREST EPISODE. Literally my favorite episode of the series. I like shows and movies where the relationship is the plot. So having an episode almost entirely dedicated to the blossoming relationship between Kinn and Porsche with little outside involvement is v good. Also, I really wish we could see the gentle, caring, silly, soft, carefree side of K more after this episode. We see glimpses later but nothing like this, when KP are well and truly alone together.

The super aggressive rock, paper, scissors is sending me.

And the fact that Kinn keeps bringing them back to the same spot and then Porsche does exactly the same thing before they just happen upon a little creek by sliding into it (though if it was really that close, how did they not see it 😬)

The betrayal after P spits on K lol

How far do they walk every day and back to get to the truck and creek though??

Kinn... Regular rocks do not start fires. Flint does though. Also lighters 👉👉

Porsche is such a shit.

Pete trying his darndest to stay hidden like Vegas definitely doesn't see him sitting in the car... The windows aren't even tinted dude (which I know is for filming purposes but come on).

The fucking smirk on Vegas's face when Pete finds the condoms then yells though.

K is trying so hard to catch a fish. Then P just pulls out some fruit like "lol I found this, keep trying for the fish tho."

The childlike wonder in K's expression and manner while P catches his fish and then he catches his own is so cute.

Apo looks so cold in the waterfall scene (I haven't watched the BTS for this episode but apparently he almost became hypothermic, the dedication ugh).

Porsche wants more kisses, Kinn. For the love of all that is holy, kiss your man.

I love that they get to know each other by sharing their dreams. It's such a nice little reflective moment where they get to know each other more and I appreciate it muchly.

The fact that Porsche really does "remember" the car crash just shows how suggestable our brains are as children. There are memories I have to this day where I'm not sure if it actually happened or was just a dream or something and my brain turned it into a memory.

They really should have tried to get a running start for that jump. Also, that was a pretty good distance they fell. Very surprised nothing was broken after that.

I really can't blame K for not wanting to go back, honestly. He must have so much on his shoulders as the heir (I mean, obviously).

"One strike, okay?" With... a pocket knife?? Yeah that's definitely gonna go through bone with one strike, P.

I like that K encourages P to leave... Because he knows it's best for P.

I LOVE how Apo acts this scene (honestly the whole sequence including after the bad guys show up) after Kinn tells him to get out of there... You can really see the man go, "Shit. I have to do this first." And then turns around and gives such a good feeling kiss. Ugh. K clenching his shirt because for him, it's the last time he'd see P and he doesn't want to let him go. Then the focus on the cuffs they'd just been wearing for who knows how many days as a symbol of them together and the journey they just went on and the falling in love. It's all so good.

P really said "you're not getting my man, fuck you." And then K gets shot 🙃

Then the look of, oh my god I really almost got away from here but now I'm trapped again, fuuuuuuuuuuuuck.

Another long one. So sorry, but not too sorry. I appreciate all of you who read these rambling text posts very much ❤

Rest day tomorrow, which I kind of need because adulting and work. I shall see you all on the 8th for episode 7. Thanks for reading, y'all.

#kprewatch2023 #i couldn't find this gif in search #so i made it in adobe express #because i'm fucking poor #and don't want to pay adobe for creative cloud bullshit #kinnporsche #kinnporsche the series

[thiswholewideworld]

ok just posting some random things about the concert last night

- I was on Ray’s side so I saw him come out first and I literally screamed. so sorry to everyone around me

- Gerard in the cheerleading outfit!! they really seemed so happy and comfortable in it just jumping and twirling around, it definitely felt more like personal expression than a performative gesture

- towards the end of the show G said “the only thing I’m sad about is that I probably won’t be able to wear this again” to which everyone awwed, but like. no. you are WELCOME to wear it again my best friend

- also loved everyone else wearing Mikey shirts since he lives in nashville!! side note: Frank’s cardigan…….

- I was worried they wouldn’t play our lady of sorrows since they played it at the last two shows and it’s one of my all time favs but THEY DID I’m actually so happy

- during give ‘em hell kid right before “you’re beautiful” G pointed at us and was like “no YOU are. it’s YOU” <3

- they were all just so smiley! like smiling at each other and at the crowd and I know everyone’s been saying that they’re just so happy to be back but like- it was just awesome to see

- I loved Mikey’s posing like you go king!! lol

- boy division, sorrows, give em hell, and HOUSE OF WOLVES back to back HOW did any of us survive

- Gerard has officially proclaimed im not okay the “greatest summer jam” so everyone else can go home now sorry

- hearing “trust me” live… my life is actually over now thanks

- being able to see Mr Ray Toro working his magic up close was life changing. I’ve never seen anyone look as happy as him playing guitar

- sadly Frank shelved the moaning during DESTROYA probably since Mikey’s fam was there but boy G sure didn’t !

- also I wasn’t super close since I got into the pit late but it was enough that I could fully see all of their faces. the thought that any of them could have seen my face is kinda messing me up ngl

- there was never a moment where I was like “oh fuck they’re looking at me” except for one time when Gerard stared in my direction for a long time and it was… very intense. I was recording at that moment (you can’t see their face very well) but I was like- do I have the flash on or something is that why he’s staring this way?? you can see me nervously turning the camera to check in the video lol

- Ray’s vocals during na na na are literally everything to me <3

- being at the first show that they played the finished version of the world is ugly is something that is actually soooo special to me

- also this is the best day ever- bullets songs just hit different man idk what to tell you

- I’ll be honest I don’t listen to wttbp a lot just because it’s such a thing, but hearing it in person surrounded by everyone singing along is just so epic. it could never be overhyped

- mama with G in the dress is obviously incredible and I’ve seen a ton of videos of them during the “should’ve raised a baby girl” part but I remember looking at Ray right before that part as well and he just looked so happy and excited knowing how loud everyone was about to sing along. they all did really. they absolutely know how much that part means to their fans

- when the intro to sleep was playing Ray smiled and raised up his wine glass lmaooo

- love that they played Helena early so they didn’t forget this time lol

- GERARD SINGING THE CIRCUS SONG WHEN THEY CAME BACK ONSTAGE FOR THE ENCORE. bestie are you calling US clowns?? ok

- Gerard’s little ramble before kids of yesterday, saying he recognized people’s faces… <3

- Ray’s solo during kids was gorgeous to behold- perfect way to end

- I’d only ever been in the pit at two other concerts and this one was by far the least crazy crowd. even though everyone was obviously excited and super energetic everyone was very respectful and considerate (also the band and crew were great with safety and giving everyone water)

Anyways this was the best night of my life and though I hope to see them again, if I don’t I’ll still be happy to have been here

#my chemical romance #mcr #mcr nashville #ray toro #mikey way #gerard way #frank iero #mikey fucking way #cheerleader gerard

[alittlefrenchtree]

I think Taylor's more professional and calmer/put together side is very noticeable in so many videos of him. Think about it! When he's interacting with fans and he's so patient, soft-spoken and the way he gestures and moves? The way he's so chill and level headed in interviews? Please read the Tatler interview from China cause it's so good and it is so apparent in how he manages himself. Like you say, because he's an adult in his early 30's, he's at that stage in life where you know who you are and he seems very confident in who he is and that's displayed on the way he speaks, which is so so beautiful. I also have a competency kink, lol. But more than that, his kindness turns me on so much, it's insane.

Hi there! I don’t even know if you remember sending this since your message has been sitting in my inbox for so long and for that I’m so sorry. I’ve been caught in the delicious daily life of being either too busy to hang out here or too tired to think and write in English. On top of that, I was late in answering asks so it took me a while to get to yours and here we are, weeks(? Probably) later.

You’re obviously right in everything you mentioned about Taylor. I feel like this conversation has been going on for so long (and it’s my fault entirely) that we kind of lost the point of how it started. All of the things you talk about are examples of how he acts when he’s the main character of the situation. Obviously for Taylor, how he acts when he’s the center of the attention and when he’s not seem to be two close things, but it’s not always the case. What fascinated me in the post that started this whole discussion was how he acts when he is part of the background somehow? What it says about him -- that someone who he’s a model and an actor with such a sunshine personality doesn’t feel the need to push himself in front of the lens, doesn't feel the need to put the attention on himself and simply is this quiet presence in the background, who just focus on his work even if it doesn’t look like the most exciting thing to do (like taking the same step over and over again to get the perfect shot) -- has intensified how I feel about him.

Like said, the thing you talk about and the thing I talk about are close things — the same traits (calm, patient) in different settings.

I’m pretty sure I’ve already read the Tatler interview but yes, point is, I suppose we’re all receptive to different circumstances even if it’s of the same qualities. I like all Taylor content but I always take very public content with a grain (or a pinch) of salt especially regarding of what people really are based on how they act in front of a camera. I don’t know if that makes sense. English is hard. I hope I don’t come across as saying that you’re wrong or that you didn’t understand something. I just like details and nuanced thoughts and I like to split hairs (is that how you say it?) to express opinions I guess.  

And oh and yes, competence kink. I had never actually put words on it before reading it in Alex but yes, obviously. Admiration is the big thing for me and what better way to summon admiration than by looking at someone who is very competent? Please.

But kindness doesn’t do much for me, actually. In general or in an is it attractive trait or not situation. It is a valuable thing but not something that triggers anything particularly positive in me. I even (sometimes) not to be suspicious over kindness because human beings are so rarely worth of trust even when they look like it. Obviously not talking specifically over Taylor here, just in general. Therefore, that’s my cue to stop rambling and say thank you for your message. So sorry it took me so long to answer 💜

#alft asks

[cream-and-tea]

how do werewolves work in lmd (plus anything else like that)

OK SO.

(this got very very long)

(just as a warning)

(also i’m going to tag @transmasc-wizard bc i remember you asked about this a while ago and a lot of this response comes from what i had typed up to respond to YOU lol)

(okay here we go)

there are (putting it very very basically) two main kinds of magic in the Ghost Story Universe: mortem (Death Juice) and vita (Life Juice). they draw from the same source (God Juice) (which is also the source of the apocalypse but that’s another post entirely) and are kind of different aspects of one thing, but still act as opposing forces. equals and opposites, can’t have one without the other, etc etc. the point is that even though they’re two different types of magic they share the same set of rules and operate under the same basic facts. one of the most basic being that magic is physically taxing to use. no magic comes without a cost

so this is pretty straightforward. and generally it isn’t anything too debilitating, but the more powerful the magic and the more magic used, the more damaging the physical effects become (for example: early on agnes’s chitchats with the ghosts she sees don’t really wear on her because it’s a very passive form of her power, but as the plot progresses and she actively draws on it more and more she starts to develop chronic headaches). the more active magic bullshit you do in succession —> the worse you’ll be feeling the next morning. people would usually need to rest for upwards of a few days after performing a major act of magic and the reason The Library focuses so much on endurance and repetition is to prevent that from happening. it’s to the point that some majorly powerful stuff is possible but the benefit of it is almost completely outweighed by the potential damage it would cause.

rambly worbuilding aside, this is really just a preface so it makes sense when i say: vampires and werewolves are what happen when people push their magic to far.

they’re basically the most extreme end of the spectrum for either kind of magic. vamps are a result of overusing vita (blood life stuff), and wolfs are a result of overusing mortem (spooky death stuff). this happens to people when they’re drawing on so much magic that their body literally cannot support it anymore and starts canabilizing itself in order to support the magic and prevent the person from just. coming apart at the seams. a Regular Person body is just incapable of handling that amount of power, so in turn they have to draw their sustenance from a different non-human source. the comparatively small piece-of-magic-apocalypse-juice in them mutates and co-opts the functions of their body in order to save that body from collapse. both vamps and wolves have to feed CONSTANTLY or they risk their bodies giving in and all their organs straight-up failing. it’s a slow transformation process and sort of representative of how much Whatever Caused The Apocalypse has become so deeply ingrained in every part of the new world. again: it presents differently but it’s all the same stuff in the end.

the world is full of monsters and weirdness and general spooky bullshit but vampires and werewolves especially have an ENORMOUS amount of stigma surrounding them because of the fact that most people still see regular magic users as recognizably human, and view the transformation as a transition from Human Person With Emotions Who I Should View As Such Despite This One Weird Thing to Inhuman Monster. most magical creatures aren’t seen as sentient in nature and many of them are actively dangerous to humans, so if someone pushes their abilities to far and ends up undergoing the transformation then it’s seen as a shift from being one of Us (normal people just trying to survive this crazy broken down to world) to being one of Them (unnatural monsters that came about as a result of the evil forest and apocalypse and want to destroy humanity), except that obviously the people who are turned are the same people they were before, just with an extra set of challenges and probably more bloodlust (which i can see being a bit of concern but c’mon. are u really going to let a little killer instinct get in the way of a lasting and meaningful relationship. weak).

They’re also used as an excuse when it comes to hatred of people born with magic at all. bc sure it SEEMS harmless when you kid is learning from their dead grandma or healing a little bit faster than normal, but with ONE WRONG MOVE they could become A VISCOUS BEAST or a BLOODSUCKING MONSTER and do you really want to take that risk?? wouldn’t it be better to stamp that out now before someone gets hurt??? even in places like The Library, which usually serves as a safe-haven for people born w magic, vamps and wolfs are seen as somehow Lesser. The Library toutes them as cautionary tales and failures of magic, basically a warning of what not to do to their students.

to get into the more specific abilities and effects and What Being A Vampire Or Werewolf Means i’ve made some handy little lists (ft. calliope and luca macnamara, a book 2-3 character that nobody knows about lol) (please click tumblr absolutely wrecked the quality):

so. yeah.

#i hope this is coherent i am truly just Saying Shit #tldr is if you do to much extreme magic you get fuckin vamped. or wolfed. but i felt the need to dig deeper and also make silly little #drawings about it. as you do. #worldbuilding isn’t always my strongsuit but i LOVE LOVE LOVE vampires and werewolves and i think i managed to do something interesting here #idk we all know monsters are Queer As Fuck and i mean. obviously. but the way i think about vamps and wolves in the lmd-verse is a bit more #in line w being disabled? especially in terms of chronic exhaustion and chronic pain since those are what i have the most experience #dealing with. but it really is pick your metaphor. #the monsters are a metaphor for eeeeeverything babyyyyy #i got to draw luca for this that was fun i love luca #he’s just a guy. anxious guy. tired guy. he just wants everyone to leave him alone so he can do crossword puzzles in peace. #if i love anything it’s my little side characters. technically a book 2 antagonist is a vampire and has a bigger role #but he’s an asshole so i don’t wanna draw him #the joke i make about calliope and luka is that calliope is a gay werewolf #who dresses like a gay vampire. and luca is a gay vampire who dresses like a gay werewolf. #nblw and mlm solidarity if you will #wip: ghost story #creme does an art

[sugirandom]

Turns out it’s the second op that I love and remember well. But like…! Look how different in tone and genre it looks compared to the first one! Admittedly the anime had filler and dragged out the beginning? I actually liked reading Bleach. And ngl I probably rewatch this arc more than the actual beginning because it is more put together but… I also love the IchiRuki lol

Unfortunately I don’t get invested in the Orihime rescue mission the same way as this Rukia rescue mission. And I can see how ppl don’t like the repetitive nature of the plots. But I do feel like there are at least some differences. Like the emotional weight is different. Both of them “chose” to leave with the antagonists. But I feel like it was very different circumstances. It’s established Orihime has feelings for Ichigo. But I don’t feel it’s reciprocated. Ichigo wants to get her because she is a friend. For Rukia he feels like he owes her. And I feel like their bond it’s different from Orihime. He feels so strongly for her despite not knowing her for as long? But Rukia is also credited as being the one who “stopped the rain in his soul”. So like…!

But also Rukia was on a clock ro execution, Orihime was just a pawn and not in danger of being killed. They both left to protect Ichigo, and his friends. But Rukia left in front of his eyes and Orihime left secretly. I can understand Ichigo’s trauma and having lost ppl would make him sensitive to Orihime just leaving and not seeing it. But it was also way more clear for Rukia it was a lot more targeted to Icjigo. The others weren’t close to her like he was. They were helping for Ichigo. For Orihime they all had a vested interest in getting her back.

I’m already rambling but as I said I have a lot of feels for Bleach but especially IchiRuki.

Sugirandom: Yes, so the second opening does look more in-line with the genre of the show even though if I recall correctly Season 2 also had a ton of filler. It's interesting to read your explanation of the differences between Orihime's rescue mission and Rukia's. I don't remember if I ever saw both of them but I think if I did I also would be a lot more invested in Rukia's rescue. Even though Orihime does eventually get some kind of powers I think? I feel like she's more of a damsal in distress type of character and therefore didn't feel that invested. I do feel like Ichigo only views Orihime as a friend and that Rukia had a substantial impact on his life in many ways.

Skipping the second op for the rescuing Rukia part of the arc, and the two filler op’s? (You can get whiplash from op’s being high action and fast passed and dramatic/angsty, or more happy and slice of life feeling. I think this following one was for when they went to rescue Orihime (I’m not a big fan of the visuals or music)

I wasn’t a big fan of the above opening 6. But opening 7 is also one of my faves (I also just love Asian Kung-Fu Generation) Still rescuing her. But I also wanna admit I couldn’t finish watching or reading all of this arc despite it’s importance to the lore. It felt too dragged out and it only made me dislike Orihime more rhan before. Whereas for the Rukia mission I grew to like her more. I mostly waited until this arc was over and watched the final battle because I heard what happened. I didn’t come back to Bleach until the Fullbringer Arc which I don’t recall when that happened in the timelime

Sugirandom: Ahh, Opening 6 definitely gives off more IchigoXOrihime vibes and I'm not really a huge fan of the animal companions lip-syncing lol. Opening 7 is much better but I'm also bias in liking Asian Kung-fu Generation. Thanks for sharing these and sorry it too so long to post my responses.

#Bleach #video #opening #Aisuryuu #Youtube

[kasaneteto]

things that have been on my mind recently:

1) i miss the posting format of twitter. well i guess not the posting so much as the following format. the posting aspect is not that different from tumblr i just miss having a private space to ramble, because tumblr is much more anyone-can-see-it. private instagrams arent the same. passworded blogs arent the same either cuz iirc those posts dont show up on your dash so thats more like screaming into a void. fuck you elon musk for taking away my safe space 🖕 it has been nice to talk more with people i wasn’t seeing on twitter tho. so im glad about that at least. its also VERY nice to not have a character limit

2) i use romantic relationships as a crutch in my life which is why theyve all turned out the way they have. or at least part of it. i need to have a relationship that moves slowly but ive never had that. every relationship ive ever had was like, jumping head first into the deep end. there was no build up or anything it was just “i like you” “i like you too” “okay we are dating now” and then i spend all day every day with that person until i get tired of them and the relationship. its fucked up!!!! i don’t want to be like that!!!! i have no idea when ill be ready for a new relationship but when i am i need to be pickier. i need to go for someone who’s exactly my type. because i also need to learn how to be independent and im still learning that. but once im independent enough to start dating again i need to wait for the perfect person to come into my life & then throw everything at them. (had a whole long thing describing my type here that i cut bc i dont want anyone to think im describing them and get weird in my dms. idk i attract desperate weirdos like flies so im being careful leave me alone) and who knows how long it will take to find someone like that! could take forever! anyways ive gone way off the rails here but the point im trying to make is that im perfectly content waiting for the perfect person to come into my life because i need to be focused on myself right now anyways.

3) i do very poorly with guilt & feeling like ive upset someone important to me. especially if the upset feels justified to me. my brain tends to rationalize my behavior for me by thinking things like “thats a weird thing to be upset by” or something when like. that doesn’t matter. maybe this is a normal thing to do but i wish guilt didnt consume me the way it does. even after ive apologized and the person has forgiven me im still so guilt ridden that it makes me depressed. its so weird. i don’t understand it at all. its something i gotta talk to my therapist abt. thats why im writing all of this down anyways is so ill remember what i wanna talk to her abt this week lol

#txt