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non-stop-imagines · 8 months

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My Girlfriend

From this idea 💖

Pairing: Logan Sargeant x Black Fem!Reader

Summary: In which Logan loves you. That's it. That's the tweet.

Word Count: ~4.1k words and a lot of smau

Warning: Twitter environment, mentions of food, one small steamy moment, it gets "angsty", Logan and reader get in small short fight, curse words, really really mushy, making it supremely obvious that Logan's love language is touch in this

A/N: I love you guys so much. I want to start there. You guys make me feel so comfortable and seen, so thank you. Now, this way actually really fun and cute to write. I don't know what it is but Logan brings my motherly instinct out but in a "I want to date him and take care of him" sort of way. Like he's the type of guy I would have a crush on in high school. Anyway, hope you guys like it and I hope to more Logan fics in the future because he deserves it. Love you all!! 💖💛💖💛

Masterlist

__________

You poke your head from around the corner of the Williams paddock to get a glimpse of who was approaching next, knowing from the commotion that it had to be a driver. It took a moment for your eyes to find the center of everyone's attention, but once you did your guard immediately went down and you waved at the couple walking toward the paddock building.

"Yn! You're here!" Lily runs up to you and engulfs you in a tight hug, making you giggle with her. Although you two haven't seen each other in person very much, but you both forced your boyfriends to give the other your numbers, so you guys have been talking non-stop since before it was even confirmed that Logan was going to be a Williams driver.

“Of course I’m here. It’s home race weekend! And my first full week of my last college summer break so I’m thriving right now.” You hold onto Lily for a little longer, basking in the touch of your friend, a temporary quelling of your real desire to finally be with Logan again in person. “Speaking of, have you guys seen the guest of honor? I’ve been waiting to surprise him for half an hour because he thinks that I had to stay on campus for an extra week.”

“He should be heading over in a moment, I think I saw him when we walked in, and we have a meeting in about 20 minutes, so…” Alex checks the time on his phone and then scans the paddock for his teammate. Eventually he spots a small crowd building around a blonde and his somewhat intimidating trainer, heading in the direction of the Williams paddock building. “He’s coming! Hide!” Alex whisper-yells towards you and Lily, who were still in a tight embrace. You two quickly break apart and you tiptoe back around the corner of the building waiting to hear your boyfriend’s voice in person for the first time in 5 months. “You’re late.” Alex starts to improvise once Logan reaches the building.

“What do you mean? The meeting isn’t for another 20 minutes.” Logan sounded exhausted already, probably emotionally from believing that the one weekend he thought he would be able to have you there was ruined.

“No, um, there was someone else that was looking for you. They said it was important.” You were surprised Alex wasn’t breaking. You thought he would in a situation like this.

“What? Who? Did you text me or something?” Right as Logan was going to check his phone for a missed text or call from his teammate, you saunter from around the corner.

“Where were you? You were supposed to be here 10 minutes ago.” You tap your wrist as you slowly start to walk over to where Logan stood, motionless, mouth hanging open. It took everything in you to not run and jump into his arms, and Logan was urging his feet to move but at the moment was failing to make them listen.

“No way.” These were the first words directed towards you, that and the brightest smile you’ve ever seen grace your boyfriend’s face. “No fucking way.” Finally his feet cooperated with him and he ran toward you, bring you into the tightest hug you have ever received, one arm fully wrapped around your shoulders and the other wrapped around just enough to cradle your head into the nape of his neck, giving you a much needed whiff of his cologne. Your arms immediately found home around his waist, resting there but also feeling like they were trying to pull him into you so he could never leave again.

“Did you miss me?” You giggle, sniffing back tears while your face is still in his neck.

“Are you kidding me? Hell, yeah I missed you! I thought you said you had to stay on campus for another week?” Logan spoke into your braids, pressing his lips to the top of your head when he wasn’t speaking.

“I had to throw you off my trail somehow.” It was like you read each other’s mind after you answered his question, because once you finished speaking, you both pulled back just enough to look at each other's face.

“I’m not letting you out of my sight.” Logan’s eyes continuously move over your face, an automatic grin tugging at the sides of his mouth.

“Sounds good to me.” You wiggle your arms from Logan’s grip to bring your hands to his face, leading his head down so you could finally kiss him, a borderline inappropriate kiss if you took in the entire scene and were close enough to see exactly the amount of tongue being used. A quiet cough signaled for you two to end the kiss, but it was a slow natural end because you knew exactly who it was that coughed. A cough you have heard many times over facetime.

“Hi, Ben.” You turn to the tall, buff man that has stalked up behind Logan’s shoulder, drawing out your words and giving him shit-eating grin as the cherry on top.

“There’s the voice that has haunted every single training session.” Ben reciprocates your grin, but after a moment, and a light scratch to Logan’s head, you’re released from Logan’s arms, grasp still on your hand, free to give a side hug to your boyfriend’s trainer. “How are you doing?”

“Much better now.” You’re yanked back into your boyfriend, your back against his chest as he brings his face back to your neck.

"Hate to break up this moment, really. But, uh, it's now 8 minutes until the meeting." Alex gave you two a remorseful smile, tilting his head towards the building. Logan doesn't move, doesn't loosen his grip, just groans into your shoulder, takes one more deep breath, then presses one more kiss to your head.

"Fine." Logan grumbles towards his teammate but then brings his mouth close to your ear. "Don't go too far, okay?" This made shivers run down your back, not the words, those were simple instructions given to make sure he could come right back to you. It was the feeling of his breath on your ear, the feeling of his hands grazing your sides, not wanting to break the touch, and the light kisses that are pressed right behind your ear and on your shoulder after you nod in agreement to staying close. Once he finally lets go of you to head to his meeting, Lily quickly makes her way to his spot, taking your hand to lead you God knows where, but Logan still watches you go off with her, glad that you were finally there in person, and realizing exactly how much of a positive difference just your presence had on the outlook of his race weekend. He needed you with him at races, and he was going to make sure you are always there.

logansargeant

Liked by lilymhe and 38,208 others

logansargeant Girlfriend appreciation post because I finally got to kiss her after not seeing her in person for 5 months

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user1 YES MY FAVORITE COUPLE IS TOGETHER AGAIN SUDJKSMS

yourusername Sooo when's my next race? 😗

>logansargeant All of the rest of the races this season if I can help it

lilymhe PRETTY GIRL 😍😍

> lilymhe Logan how in the world did you bag this baddie 🥵

>yourusername LOVE YOU BBY 😘😍💕

>logansargeant Well rn I'm questioning whether I've bagged her at all 🧍🏼‍♂️

"You left me." You pout, leaning from behind the barrier that separates guests from the rest of the garage to look at your boyfriend, who was in the nook where his helmet sat on a shelf as he spoke to his trainer.

"It wasn't my choice. I wanted to wait until you woke up." He takes a couple of steps towards you, undoing the top strap of his race suit so he could be more comfortable.

"We didn't have time to wait for you to wake up." Ben comments, picking up Logan's helmet as he does so.

"Ben, why do you hate me so?" You dramatically fluctuate your voice, instinctively allowing Logan to snake his arms under yours to pull you in as much as he could into a hug and nuzzle his head into your neck.

"I don't hate you. I will say that those 5 months I didn't see you in person weren't long enough." You both chuckle at the banter thrown between you two before you bring your attention to your boyfriend clinging to you.

"You okay, baby?" You bring a hand to the back of Logan's head, gently raking your nails through his hair.

"Yeah, just glad you're here." His voice was low, words vibrating through your neck before you feel his lips press a kiss at the base.

"I'm glad I get to be here." Logan finally lifts his head from the crook of your neck, tired eyes moving around your face and lips not giving away exactly how happy he was that he could touch you, smell you, hear your voice. "You sure you're okay?"

Logan stays silent for a moment, neutral face before pressing a kiss to your lips, nothing special, something like what you guys give each other after saying "Hello". After the kiss, though, a tickling, eye crinkling smile emerged on his face. "That's crazy…" His words were more of a whisper to himself.

"Can I get in on this great realization?" You mess with his appearance, velcroing the top strap on his race suit and smoothing down hair that moved while his face was in your neck.

"Kissing you calms me down immediately." It was said so matter-of-factly, but the abrupt discovery caused you to blink your eyes wide and for him to explain. "Ten seconds ago, I was ready to high-tail it outta here." He pauses, his child-like smile melting your heart. "Okay, I'm exaggerating, I'm just always very freaking nervous before driving, and not in a good way most of the time, but I had to just deal with it cause I had no choice. Now, I'm just excited. It's fucking Monaco, and your here with me and now I'm ready to put in some fire qualifying laps." He still had a smile on his face, looking at you like you were a crown jewel.

"Well, I'm glad I can help." You giggle out your words, a smile on your face that coaxes Logan to kiss you again, spontaneously, pulling you in by your shoulders.

"I love you." Logan didn't want to leave, didn't want to remove his hands from you, so he was glad that he could mentally use waiting for your response as an excuse.

"I love you too. Now, go put those fire laps in. I'll be here." You wave him away and watch as he practically bounces to grab his helmet, get weighed and then hop in his car. You look over at Ben, still in the nook next to the shelves that still held one more helmet, smiling and nodding at the "Thank you" he mouths your way.

__________

"16th isn't too bad." You place pressure with your thumb at the top of Logan's bare shoulder. You were kneeling behind him on the massage bed in his room, massaging his shoulders, the sound of the cars on track for Q2 quietly rumbling in the background.

"Yeah, I guess…" Logan has his head tilted to the side, exposing a greater surface area for you to massage. It was silent for a moment after that, you just kept focusing on massaging out Logan's shoulders, using the grunts he would let out as a guide for where to massage next, and placing kisses on different areas as you went.

"You extracted from the car what you could on this track. That's all anyone can ask for." You had to keep yourself from raising your voice, you had the tendency to get loud when you were passionate about something, in this case, passionate about keeping your boyfriend out of the dark cave he was walking himself into.

"Yeah, but Alex-" Logan was about to depreciate himself further, but you were quick to shut it down, stopping your hands where they were and leaning over his shoulder so you were able look at the side of his face, but the feeling of your eyes on him made him turn to look at you.

"Do not compare yourself to Alex. Alex has been driving at this level since 2019. He was a Red Bull driver. He was Max Verstappen's teammate. This is your sixth race in F1. You're still learning, and that's okay. Okay?" You watched him with a straight face, waiting for confirmation that he heard and understood you. To show that he was listening in his own way, he takes one of your hands that had traveled higher up his shoulder and grabbed it, wrapping your arm around his shoulder as a means of pulling you back to his side, letting his eyes roam around your face before leaning in to kiss you.

"Okay." He lets a content grin that held a slight bit of smugness settle on his face after he answers, and then goes in for another kiss. And another. And another. And as he kept kissing you, progressively using more and more tongue, he gently used your arm to guide you around him as he shifted back against the wall behind the massage table, ultimately ending up with you on your knees straddling him as you continued to make out. An air of youthful lust was swirling around you two as the make out session went on and hands began to wander. It first started with Logan's hands traveling down your sides, finally landing at your hips, thumbs massaging your the portion of flesh between your torso and the top of your thigh. It elicited an oddly erotic feeling as he did so, bringing you to want the same for him. So it was your turn to let your hands roam free next, removing themselves from his hair and running from his shoulders down to wear his race suit clung to his waist. You slithered a hand inside and continued down his thigh before coming back up to palm him through his underwear, your other hand sliding back up to his shoulder to give you stability. You smile into the kiss as you feel him get harder under your hand, swallowing the low, grumbling moans he let out.

“Fuuucckk…” This came out as a hiss from Logan’s agape mouth as you begin to move your hand up and down over him, still over his underwear, and kiss along his jaw.

“You want me to help you feel better?” You whisper this in his ear, then trail kisses from his earlobe, behind his ear and down his neck.

If everything went your guys’ way, you would’ve been able to do as you said, allowed the lust in his brain to take over and mask the stress from the day, even for just a moment. But life doesn’t work like that, and instead Ben walks in without warning, cause all three parties in the room to yelp in shock. “What the fuck, you two!?" There was a mad scramble from you and Logan to make yourselves at least semi decent while Ben exits and comes back in a minute later.

"I bet you'll knock next time." You comment when he comes back in, you standing next to the massage table and Logan sitting on top of it, leaning over to press his lips to your head, smiling against your hair.

"I never had to worry about it until you decided to grace us with your constant presence." He sets down some equipment on a chair in the corner and pulls out his phone to look at something.

"Speaking of, it's your lucky day. I'll be around for the rest of the season. Logan will have his own groupee." You beam like a proud child, looking toward your boyfriend when you feel his head lift up.

"Wha-how? What about your last semester?" Logan messed with your hair the slightest bit while waiting for your answer.

"My counselor helped me figure out how I could do the rest of my classes online. And since I'm studying athletic training and physical therapy, I can shadow Ben here and get some hands-on experience. Everyone wins, that is, if Ben doesn't hate me so much that he doesn't let me shadow him?" You bat your eyelashes and pout at the tall man who stares at you for a moment then takes a defeated deep breath.

"Stop saying I hate you. I don't hate you, you're just always here… but I guess you won't be a nuisance if you're helping." Obviously exhausted with the 2 horny young adults in front of him, Ben sighs and runs a hand through his hair, already mentally preparing to have to deal with you and Logan together for the rest of the season, but he couldn't help but feel a little sappy when he see you both send wide, thankful smiles his way. "Okay, that's enough. Stop looking at me like that. You, off the table and start stretching out your arms. You, over here so you can keep your hands off my driver." He points and beckons you over to him, and you watch as he begins Logan's post driving recovery routine.

"Fuck." This was the first word uttered from Logan as he plopped down in a folding chair in the garage following his retirement from the race in Hungary. He didn't take the time to look at anyone or anything, just sat down, took the towel from the back of the chair, and put it over his head as he rested his elbows on his knees. You look around the garage for anyone that could possibly reprimand you before moving from behind the barrier to go over to your boyfriend, squatting next to him.

“Hey, you were doing good. It was just a misstep.” You place a hand on his arm in an effort to console him, but in response he jerks his arm away from you.

“It was a bit more than just a fucking misstep, Yn. God, why are you always trying to make it seem like everything is fine when my literal fucking job is on the line each time I fuck up?” His voice was stern but tired as he turned his head to look at you, view partially disrupted from the towel.

“I think it’s because your fucking job is on the line that you can’t do this. It happens, Logan.” You match the annoyed energy he gave you, because you were annoyed. Yeah, this sucked. It felt horrible watching him spin out with only 3 laps to go knowing that he had the capability to do great things in that updated Williams car. But that’s not the situation.

“Sure, it happens, but not every fucking race. I don’t know if you realize, but I’m the only one doing this shit! And it’s not something I can just fucking get over, not matter what you tell me. So honestly I just need you to leave me alone because the last thing I fucking need is for you to tell me that everything is okay.” You proceeded to stand from your squatted position as he lashed out at you, watching as he swipes the towel from his head and sits straight up to look at you. From his eyes you could tell that he was not backing down from his words, and while you weren’t completely going to let his little boy-like outburst slide, you think about your answer for a moment. Your jaw shifted as you gave him an exhausted neutral look, observing the flush in his cheeks trying to be remedied by a creeping blush. He was tired. He was dehydrated.

“Fine. I’m gonna go. But not because you, whoever you think you are, told me to, but because I know MY Logan will meet me back in his room to talk to me like a person. You see, MY Logan doesn’t raise his voice at me, MY Logan doesn’t cuss me out, and MY Logan does not wallow. So, when MY Logan is ready to talk, you can tell him to meet me in his room.”

You turn on your heel and begin to make your way out of the garage, plastering a smile on for passersby. “Yn…” Logan calls after you, reaching a hand out that you don’t see because you kept your back turned, but you do put your own hand up to signal for him to stop talking, pausing for a second longer and then continuing on to where the drivers’ rooms were.

__________

There was a gentle knock on the door half an hour after the debacle that you didn't verbally respond to, you just jumped off of the massage bed and grabbed the Gatorade and banana that sat on the table next to you, waiting for him to open the door. When he does, he flashes a miniscule pitiful grin, closes the door, and walks over to take the snack that you were holding out to him. But he wanted to focus on you, have his hands free for the moment when he was able to touch you again without fear of you biting his hands off, so he places the food back on the massage bed and begins to play with his fingers.

"Hi." He started off slow, trying to gauge how you were feeling.

"Hi." Your arms were crossed and exhausted annoyance was still on your face, but he could see that it had relaxed somewhat, so he continued cautiously.

"I'm sorry." He tests the waters with a smile after he speaks, taking a small step forward that you don't step back from. You stay stoic and unmoving, only lifting an eyebrow when Logan began to run a finger up and down your upper arm. He was making progress."There's no excuse for how I acted out there. I was an ass."

You were silent, purposefully done so to make Logan sweat a bit before flashing a grin. "I forgive you. Honestly, the reaction you had made sense, you were tired and frustrated. But the way that you expressed it, that was where you went wrong." Logan brings you closer to him by your elbows, since your arms were still crossed, and gives you a kiss on your forehead.

"Yeah, I know." This was mumbled against your forehead because at this point, now that Logan had his hands on you, had your perfume swirling around his head, he didn't want to move.

"Next time, just tell me that you don't want to talk right now. And I would also suggest giving me a kiss so I know you're not mad or being a brat." You giggle, a sound that intensifies when Logan pulls you all the way into his chest and peppers kisses at the base of your jaw.

"Got it." He pulls back to answer you, and then gives you one more kiss, this time on your lips.

"Good. Now, uh, you still have the post-race meeting don't you?" You absentmindedly mess with the collar of his quarter zip jacket that your just now realizing he had on, trying to schedule out the rest of the day in your head.

"Yeah, and to be honest, I don't know how long it's gonna go. I probably won't be back at the hotel until late." His heart fluttered watching you, your face the physical representation of the wheels turning and then shifting in an instant when his words register.

"You mean 'we' won't be back until late." You grin confidently up at him.

"Uh, how would you…" Logan looks at you questioningly as you give one last swipe to his collar and pat him on the chest.

"It's pretty comfy on the floor outside of the meeting room. And I'll have earphones, so I won't hear a thing, even though you guys basically whisper anyway." You turn around to pick up and hand the banana and Gatorade to him again, flicking your eyes at the fruit indicating that you wanted him to take a bite. Now. And he does, aftee breaking off a piece and handing it to you since he knew that you were probably stressing all day and were extremely hungry. Just as you smiled and ate the piece of fruit there was a couple of knocks on the door before Ben entered, announcing his presence, but he stood confused when he just saw you two eating.

"You want some banana?" Logan somehow holds in his laughter as he holds out the fruit to his trainer who looks at both of you before pinching his nose and getting to what he came in for.

"No, thank you…Come on, the meeting is in a few minutes." When both you and Logan start following, Ben stops in his tracks. "Where do you think you're going?" Ben wiggles a finger at you as Logan snakes his hand in yours and you begin to swing the arm of the entwined hand.

"I'll be outside the room. And I've got earphones, so I definitely won't hear everyone's whispers." Your wide, tooth-filled child like smile didn't seem to visibly sway the trainer, but a tip of his head toward the door had you and Logan practically skipping behind him, hands clasped together up until the last possible moment when he disappears behind the meeting room door and you take a seat on the floor, making yourself busy until you can touch your boyfriend again.

yourusername

Liked by williamsracing and 20,480 others

yourusername So proud of this guy and were only halfway through the season! 💙 Now it's time to party 🥳

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logansargeant 💙

user2 LITTLE LOGAN 🥹😫

>yourusername I KNOW HE WAS SUCH A QT 😍😍

>user2 THE QUEEN ANSWERED I LUV YOU💕

>logansargeant Was? 😔

user3 I'm in love with all of these photos 😍 only Yn can grace us with such great pics of our baby

user4 We're all so proud of this boy! After Silverstone that car has been a rocketship 🚀

>user4 you know, all things considered

yourusername

Liked by lewishamilton and 29,839 others

yourusername A little R&R before gettin back to it. Spain and Florida style 🌴

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alex_albon Please tell me what Logan is like drunk 🙏

>logansargeant You could've asked anything and this is it

>alex_albon The world wants to know 🌎

>yourusername He's touchy feely ☺️

user5 Queen, you're with a man that takes fishing pics?

>yourusername It's his one down fall (but Im the one taking them so what does it say about me?) 🤷🏿‍♀️

user6 Loving this black women being loved aesthetic 🖤🤎

user7 Ben must've been the adult supervision

logansargeant

Liked by oscarpiastri and 39,628 others

logansargeant Quality Time ♥️ Now back to work 💪🏼

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yourusername This is why I'm with you...you take such great pictures of me 💁🏿‍♀️

>logansargeant Yes...that's why 👀

daltonsargeant It was great seeing you two! Now go put in those hours 💪🏼💪🏼🇺🇸

user8 Yn is so pretty it hurts

>logansargeant It's a satisfying pain 😌

#black reader #formula 1 #f1 imagines #formula 1 x black!reader #request #f1 x black!reader #logan sargeant x black!reader #logan sargeant x reader #logan sargeant #logan sargeant imagine #f1 scenario #f1 smau

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valyrfia · 21 days

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i want to start reading more f1 rpf other than lestappen but idk where to start is there any way you could recommend some fics pretty please?????????????? 🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺🥺

sure thing anon! below is just a selection of my favourite fics that aren't straight forward Charles/Max:

melepathic. or something. by Anonymous – Lando/Oscar, 8k, snappy and funny FWB, rated M

somebody else by piastrism - Charles/Max/Oscar, 31k, FWB and addictive on and off again situationships, rated E

ode to a conversation stuck in your throat by prettyrotten – George/Alex, 40k, pining exes to pining FWB, rated E

icarus falls by tiredgayloser - Charles/Carlos (main) and Charles/Max (endgame), 24k, complicated relationships and character study, situationships vs. relationships, rated E

on the faultline by limabima – Lewis/Nico, 47k, dual timeline, FWB and Internalised Homophobia vs. healing and facing your past, rated E

win or lose (it's how you play the game) by chiliconcarlos – Charles/Carlos, 18k, ridiculous bets and consequences thereof, gay chicken, rated E

matchstick people by ecorone – Lewis/Max, 60k, magical realism and folk horror, rated E

translation theory by linearity - Charles/Carlos, 9k, rancid vibes, a hunger to hold an upper hand and wanting what you're denying you'll lose anyway, rated E

the heartbeat is a hunger by withfeathers - Lewis/Seb and Lewis/Nico, 40k, soulmates and trope inversion, falling in love after losing the love of your life, rated E

even a Mouse by ficster28 - No Romatic Relationships (Charles and Max centered though), 20k, Dæmon AU exploring the concept of sacrifice in motorsport, rated T

Hide All Our Sins From the Daylight by kolyarostov - Carlos/Lando, 60k, secret relationship and the implications of being implied queer in the public spotlight, rated E

#f1 fic rec #asks #anon #fic recs #brocedes #carlando #lestappen #galex #sewis #lestapiastri #f1 fic recs

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tonicandjins · 11 months

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frequent flyers | lee donghyuck

CHARACTERS: haechan | lee donghyuck x fem reader

WORD COUNT: 13k

GENRE: angst, fluff, smut (non-linear) | best friends to strangers

AUTHOR'S NOTE: read with caution. this is written in a non-linear form, so you don't know when it's going to hurt ;) this is a dh x reader version of my markhyuck fic from ao3, but with a different ending

frequent flyers is the third installment from 23 moments with donghyuck

Donghyuck looks beautiful like this: skin glowing under the dainty string lines and lined up lanterns hanging from the high ceilings, lips curled up to genuine smile instead of the usual teasing smirk plastered on his mouth, cheeks tainted in berry red—a single manifestation of the glasses of wine he’s had tonight, eyes round and sincere and everything you’ve ever known.

Zhong Chenle’s mellifluous voice echoes in the banquet, singing to the tune of lover as the newly weds take their first dance (third song in) in the middle of the floor, surrounded by couples and lovers swaying. From your peripheral view, you catch a glimpse of Park Jisung sneaking his phone out and recording the whole thing—after Chenle clearly mentioned no one else aside from the newlyweds’ assigned videographer is allowed to film him.

On other days, you’d love to listen to Chenle’s golden voice, and he knows this because from all the years you’ve known him, you’d supported his career and you’d spend many hours sitting in his studio, listening to him record, or sitting somewhere halfway across the world, watching him write his songs. I can listen to him sing all day, you’d say, but as the night jumps deeper into its darkness, you realize how excruciatingly long his 15-minute medley went by.

You look across the room.

Donghyuck looks enthralling like this: beautiful even after all these years, charming like he’s the day he turned 21, grown, earnest, and at ease. It’s agonizing to look at from where you sit across the room—hands wrapped around her waist, eyes closing as he leans in, drunk, drunk, drunk like the night you’d left him, heart void of you.

You begin to count.

At 27, you’re pretty much done with all kinds of romance the world could offer.

Unlike the person sitting next to you, you prefer to listen to Blushing Youth than watch some high-rated romantic comedy film during your 12-hour flight from Heathrow to Incheon, and while you’ve been moving around for most of your life (having earned your nickname as frequent flyer, credits to Jisung), flying is not one of the things you’re fond of. In fact, it’s not in the long list of strengths you brag about in your LinkedIn bio. You reckon it would truly be embarrassing, to say the least, to ask a stranger to distract you from the sound of the aircraft’s engine running at full power as it takes off from the runway, hence you opt to blast Ahn Jiyoung’s voice right in your eardrums.

It’s odd, people would say, for someone who’s supposedly mastered the art of moving from one country to another to be so terrified of flights, but if people want you to be completely honest, nothing sounds more horrifying than the thought of seeing Lee Donghyuck after years of radio silence.

As pathetic as it sounds, your heart still skips a beat—three, sometimes—at the thought of him.

Donghyuck, who used to be your sun, who had you orbiting around his gravitational pull for years, who used to be so close but not enough to have, who—if you think about it now—might have never been the center of your solar system after all, but maybe just a shooting star passing by.

The plane takes off, roughly and loud like you’d expected, and you catch a glimpse of a scene from Love, Rosie from the person sitting beside you and immediately regret going coach instead of flying business like how you would if your flights last more than ten hours. You hate this film; you hate it because Alex is to Rosie, like how Donghyuck is to you.

Alex and Rosie, like you and Donghyuck, are—were—long-time best friends who used to be inseparable until one day they’re not. Rosie misses her chance. Alex stops yearning, hoping, waiting, and finally decides to get on with his life. It’s a story of a bunch of tangled webs—a messy tumbleweed of missed calls and delayed flights, of long nights and short days, of forgotten promises and faded hope.

The film introduces new people, bids goodbye to old chapters, but in the end it’s Alex and Rosie.

And you wish that’s how your story went. You don’t end up kissing him in your very own hotel with an awe-striking view of the horizon right outside the window.

You bury the thought before you start missing him again. You run out of tracks from Blushing Youth’s discography like how you run dry from thinking about what happens next when your plane lands.

Might as well sleep it off.

A sharp, jabbing pain on your left leg wakes you up from your unscheduled sleep. Hissing, you find Donghyuck sitting on top of your legs.

“I swear to God,” you breathe, kicking your best friend’s weight off your limbs. “I will freaking kill you.”

“Dude, what’s wrong with saying fuck? You’re literally twenty,” Donghyuck replies, moving further so his entire body crushes yours, and you have to pretend that his warmth doesn’t make you feel some type of way, hence you push him as hard as you can until he falls onto the carpeted floor of your room.

He falls with a thump. “Screw you,” he mumbles, mouth forming a pout that you’d gladly smack out of his face—except you’d do it with your very own lips. “It’s almost one in the afternoon. Why are you napping?”

“Good question, Donghyuck,” you start, sitting up and rubbing your eyes while looking for the pair of specs that Donghyuck is already shoving towards your direction; you gladly take it. “Unlike you, I had to work in the café until one in the morning. I hate being rostered in the closing shift, but it pays damn well. Plus, I forgot to do my laundry so I had to throw my clothes in before I slept.

“Overworking again, I see,” he muses, sighing as he scoots to sit cross-legged across you on the bed too tiny for two people.

“The last week of the semester always sucks balls,” you answer, tilting your head in attempts to stretch your stiffened neck and get some kind of relief. “Why are you here anyway? Shouldn’t you be out there doing something stupid with Na Jaemin?”

“There’s a music festival on Friday,” he starts right away. “Jaemin’s wondering if I’d be interested to go, says he could get us some free passes from the guy he’s hooking up with. Apparently, the guy is DJ-ing.”

You blink. “Which one? Lee Jeno? Or Yoon Sanha?” you ask, genuinely curious because Jaemin is Jaemin and he could never be caught exclusively hooking up with one person.

Donghyuck shrugs. “Does it matter? Is it a yes or a no? That’s the question.”

He begins to fiddle with his fingers, playing with the rings on his long, delicate digits, and you recognize it almost instantly. Donghyuck is nervous. You might have an idea why.

“Is this you finally asking me out, Lee Donghyuck?” you half-joke, scratching your head. Donghyuck looks anywhere but your face. A glimpse of his eyes is all you need, because if the eyes are the windows to one’s soul, then Donghyuck’s are wide open, with no curtains and bare from all layers—at least that’s how they are to you. His eyes are wavering, and though he’s mastered the ability to keep his face tough as steel, those orbs could only do so little when it comes to hiding from you.

So, you smile, reaching out and leaning closer, kneeling until you’re face to face with him. “Only kidding, Hyuck,” you say finally, taking it easy because this conversation is not for one who’s hazy from sleep and one who can’t even look at the other in the eyes. “Of course, I’ll come with you. Who else can you bring anyway?”

Donghyuck looks up, rolling his eyes; he’s back. “You’re not really irreplaceable,” he replies smugly. “Don’t think too highly of yourself.”

You poke your tongue out and reach over your night stand to check your phone; at the same time, Donghyuck starts biting his fingernails. You don’t think twice—like blinking, a habit, natural—and reach out to pull his hand away, mumbling about how he should start working on getting rid of this bad habit of his. Donghyuck’s hand is warmer compared to yours, and he lets out a whine, complaining about your freezing hands, but squeezes you hand back anyway.

You are content with this. You hope Donghyuck is, too.

The lingering touches. The stolen kisses. The piercing glances.

While they all seem fleeting and simple, they mean the most to you. You begin to think if Donghyuck feels the same as he pulls you closer until you’re both back lying on his bed, your cheek resting on top of Donghyuck’s warm, cloth-covered chest. You wonder if he means it, when he says you’re not irreplaceable and that maybe you’re a little too comfortable, a little too satisfied with whatever it is that you have.

On a drunken night, Donghyuck may have asked you once. You remember it and think about it so much that sometimes it felt like a dream.

“How long, Y/N,” he had asked, his voice an octave deeper than usual, gaze a shade darker. “How long until you let yourself just lose it? For once, just—just please, let your feelings consume you.”

You didn’t want to—not then, not now—because it’s going to hurt.

It’s going to hurt because it’s Donghyuck.

It’s Donghyuck who feels like home, whose hands are warm enough for your cold ones, your own little sun. Losing him is the extinction of your solar system.

“Y/N,” he had whined when you didn’t reply, shaking you, pleading. “When are you going to want for more? I want you to ask me for more.”

But Donghyuck had passed out before you had the chance to think of an answer—time frame—and you wonder what your answer would have been if Donghyuck stayed awake for a couple more minutes.

“I guess napping at this time of the day doesn’t sound too bad,” Donghyuck murmurs against your hair, kissing it before relaxing. “Set an alarm for me. 3 pm.”

You hope Donghyuck asks you again, not this time, but you hope the question lingers in his mind a little longer.

He falls asleep to the sound of your breathing.

When the person sitting next to you finally wakes up, you could only sigh in relief.

The aircraft has landed a few minutes ago, and your flight seatmate slept so soundly that it took you a couple of minutes to shake her awake.

The 12-hour flight is a pain in the ass, and you wish you mean that figuratively. Waiting was something that you were once good at, and Renjun often told you he wished he had half the patience you had. If you think about it now and reflect whether you’re as patient and as willing to wait as before, you’d changed vastly. Ridiculous, how one could change so much in a lifetime.

Huang Renjun is standing behind a barricade when you finally reach the arrival area after going through immigration. He’s holding a piece of paper that says WELCOME HOME, Y/N! Renjun doesn’t give you the time to cross the boundary because he attacks you in bone-crushing hug the second he’s allowed to. You almost topple over him, your glasses at risk of either falling out of your face and into the cold, hard ground, or being crushed between your nose and Renjun’s shoulder.

Renjun chants your nickname over and over again, swaying both your bodies left and right as though you weighed nothing. “I’m literally about to combust. My chest has been pounding since I arrived here. You have no idea how much I missed you, and you were taking forever to go through immigration.”

“Oh, Huang Renjun,” you sigh, inhaling his scent and returning the hug. “Some things never change. You’re still the sweetest when you miss people. Absence really makes the heart grow fond.”

Renjun pulls away to get a good look on you. “Y/N, you’re all grown up. I can’t believe you resisted not seeing me in person for four years.”

“You’re just as grown up as I am,” you reply. “We Facetime each other every other day. What are you talking about?”

“It’s never the same,” he mumbles and helps you with your luggage despite it only being one small luggage, a small duffel bag, and your small backpack. He starts nagging as soon as he notices how small your baggage is.

“You were away for literally four years and you think packing three old shirts and a pair of jeans will be enough to get you through your entire trip here?” Renjun gasps. “You’re stupid if you think Chenle and Jisung are allowing you to leave after what we’re all here for. They have an entire month planned out the second you agreed to come home.”

“I didn’t bring only three shirts, for your information. And I did bring a few pairs of trousers and a coat, plus my dress for the wedding,” you defend. “And I can’t extend my trip here. I thought we’ve all got that one settled.”

Renjun laughs, as if what you said is some kind of joke, as he leads you towards the exit of the airport. “You know we would 100%, without hesitation, burn your passport if it means we could make you stay longer, don’t you? I hope you don’t underestimate us like that.”

You chuckle at his empty threat, your chest swelling at the thought of your long-time friends being thrilled of your arrival in Seoul. You wonder how much has changed in the last four years, and you reckon nothing much has when it comes to your friends. You’d left when most of you were twenty-three, and the only person you’d ever seen in person since then was Chenle, who at that time, had business in London so he stayed where you lived instead of a luxurious hotel he could afford.

“We’re heading to Chenle’s place,” Renjun announces as soon as you sit comfortably in the passenger seat of his car. “But he’s still in his studio recording something, so he won’t be around until maybe five.”

“Why are we going to Chenle’s place if he’s not there yet?” you ask. “He didn’t tell me he had work.”

“We’ve all worked around our schedules to meet you today,” Renjun explains as he turns the ignition on and starts backing up. “And everyone knows his home’s passcode. Remember back in college when his stupid fancy condo eventually became everyone’s? That’s still how it is now. Only this time, he owns a penthouse in Gangnam’s most expensive building. What a spoiled brat.”

“He earned it,” you comment.

Renjun hums. An old track from the local radio station plays just as the vehicle exits the airport’s parking area. You hadn’t heard this song in years, but your mouth sings the lyrics as though it’s only been yesterday.

Renjun is amused. “Some things never really change.”

Donghyuck suddenly changes his hair color on Sophomore year in college. You, on the other hand, are about to have an aneurysm.

Na Jaemin makes fun of you, laughs as if your reaction is the most hilarious thing he’s ever seen his entire life. He deems it as the best day of his life.

“Jaemin, am I a fucking joke to you?” you ask. Jaemin doesn’t even bother to answer. “You think this is funny?”

You almost choke on nothing when Donghyuck decides to walk towards the table you’re sharing with Jaemin inside the university’s very own cafeteria. He’s holding a tray of food for lunch. The man himself has a shy smile on his face, evidently aware of the attention that the people around are giving him because of his newly-dyed pink hair, and you can’t really blame anyone if they stared a little longer.

Because Donghyuck is already beautiful, with his shining eyes and glowing skin and a smile that could make the earth stop orbiting around the sun.

But this Donghyuck, Pink Sun as Jaemin had started calling him, he’s something else. You might pass out if you look at him a little longer.

“I told you pink looks amazing on you!” Jaemin exclaims as soon as Donghyuck is close enough.

Donghyuck instantly blushes, but covers it up with a smug smirk across his mouth.

“Careful,” Donghyuck warns. “I don’t want you getting hurt if I reject you.”

Jaemin gasps, “You would never!”

Donghyuck playfully sticks out his tongue on Jaemin and finally, finally, turns towards you. Your breath is caught in a hitch. Donghyuck tilts his head slightly and you’re about to punch himself in the face.

“What do you think?” the man asks, smiling cheekily. “Do you think I look better blond or pink-haired?”

You swallow. It takes you great power not to pull Donghyuck and kiss him squarely on the mouth.

Blond Donghyuck was a menace in the society. Pink Sun is giving you a heart attack.

But you’re not about to make things too obvious, so you shrug and mutter a small “either is fine.” Jaemin kicks you under the table. Donghyuck sighs, taking out his phone to open its front camera, probably to check himself out as he brushes his fingertips in his hair.

“You’re cheap, Y/N,” he says, putting his phone down. “I basically burn my scalp to get this hair color and pull it off better than Lee Taeyong ever will, and all I get from you is, ‘either is fine.’”

Jaemin laughs hysterically, taking his phone out as Donghyuck takes the empty seat beside you—like always, because seats beside you are always reserved for him. Donghyuck carefully places the tray of food he got, immediately, your eyes catch the extra drink he has and your heart somersaults because you know it’s for you.

And this is supposed to be normal. Your friends tell you it’s a routine—every day—and you and him do things for each other like second nature. So, why does it make your heart race like this?

Your phone chimes as Donghyuck starts eating.

“We really need to work on your communication skills,” the text message from Jaemin says.

Your comprehension in Korean went from bad to worse, if it’s even possible.

Renjun is currently roasting you for it, while Jisung and Kim Minjeong are arguing about what to eat. You tell them how small the Asian community in London is as compared to other countries. Jaemin announces that Mark Lee just boarded his flight from Vancouver, too, and you cheer, excited to see him as well after all these years. Yoo Jimin calls out Jisung and Minjeong’s bullshit and says she’d already ordered from the nearest restaurant.

How you all end up in Chenle’s penthouse before the owner himself is aware, you have no idea. All you know is that things have not really changed that much.

You feel a little disoriented, your mind still a little hazy from the 12-hour trip, and you hate that the jetlag is hitting you as early as now. You feel like you could fall asleep anytime soon.

Then you hear familiar voices faintly coming from the door, then the door itself being unlocked. You observe from the digital clock above Chenle’s fancy television that it’s only nearly two in the afternoon, so it’s not Chenle who’s coming in.

Donghyuck appears from the door before you realize it, and he takes your breath away before you could even look him in the eyes.

“Sorry, we’re late,” the dark-haired man says, his voice making you feel suffocated, stepping out of his boots because God forbid anyone who steps inside Zhong Chenle’s penthouse wearing the outdoor shoes.

Lee Jeno enters behind him, his eye smile ready to meet you, while Jaemin says they arrived just in time for lunch. All is a blur and everything sounds like white noise, because Donghyuck looks at you in the eyes with the softest gaze, the smallest smile, and suddenly it doesn’t feel so cold in Seoul.

Jeno walks past him and finds his space beside Jaemin. You hear Renjun and Jisung start arguing about another thing. All while Donghyuck stays still from where he stands, about ten feet away from your space, eyes still on you.

When they’re done dancing, Donghyuck walks with her, holding her hand and keeping her close.

He passes by, doesn’t even take a glance to your direction.

Donghyuck looks at you in amusement.

“It was terrible,” you grunt. “The worst day of my life.”

He giggles and pulls you in his arms, kissing the top of your head while you stand in the middle of the room. You’re still dressed in your warm clothes as you’d just arrived from the airport. You sigh in relief because you’ve been waiting for this all weekend.

“Don’t be too dramatic,” he mumbles. “Your cousin’s going to be ballistic if he learns that you called his wedding the worst day of your life.”

“You should’ve gone there with me,” you muse. “They were introducing me to so many people, and my uncle knows I’m shit at socializing, therefore forcing me to hang out with people I barely know is like stabbing me in the eye and asking me how many fingers you’re holding up.”

Donghyuck chuckles. “What could I have done if I were there?”

You smile, burying your face in his warm chest. “Absolutely nothing.”

“Then why’d you need me there?” Donghyuck asks again. You know he’s teasing you now, poking until he gets the answer he wants to hear. And you’re not about to deny Donghyuck of that. Besides, nothing is more satisfying than knowing you could make Donghyuck feel flustered despite of his strong, wild persona. So, you reach up and kiss him on the chin and hug him closer.

“Because nothing is as bad as it seems when you’re around, my love.”

Donghyuck begins to pull away, making you hold onto him tighter, as if your hands would grow cold without touching him. Donghyuck only laughs, allowing you to hug him longer, and you wonder if you could stretch this night out for as long as he can.

The moment passes by quickly.

“Donghyuck, will you at least listen to me?”

“I’m done, Y/N.”

Renjun announces he’s done cleaning up.

Jaemin doesn’t waste a single second, getting up from his space on the other couch and announces it’s time they really catch up with everyone. It turns out that Jimin herself just got back from Germany yesterday as well, while Minjeong took a week off from work, and all had waited for you to come home before gathering in Chenle’s place.

“Mark’s a piece of shit, just like you,” Jeno comments when asked why the older didn’t take the earliest flight. Apparently, like yourself, Mark couldn’t get a couple of weeks off from work, hence he’d decided to travel a few days before the wedding, which is essentially why you all had a reason to gather once again after all these years.

“Why are you all harassing me and Mark for not being able to take a longer leave from work?” you whine, throwing a cushion towards where Jeno is seated, right beside Jimin. “It’s not like we can help it!”

Minjeong snorts, “You could’ve said you have COVID or something.”

You snicker. “Only you could think of that, Minjeong-ah.”

Jeno talks about his recent flight to Yonagunijima in Okinawa for a business trip. Renjun tells him he’s never gone that far in Japan, his farthest trip being in Osaka; Jeno says he can take him there anytime he gets some free time from work. Jaemin hypes up Jisung’s newly built dance studio and the contract he’d just signed with the biggest entertainment company in Asia, to which Jisung only downplays and says it’s not that big of deal.

You and Donghyuck stay quiet while everyone else talks over one another. He sits at the other end of the same couch you’re sitting on while Jisung occupies the space between you and him. Renjun probably feels the tension, so he cuts it.

“Donghyuck, what have you been up to?” Renjun asks, reaching over for a piece of chocolate you’d stolen from Chenle’s fridge.

Donghyuck shrugs. “Renjun-ah, don’t act like we don’t see each other every weekend.”

Renjun scoffs. “We’re here to catch up. Do you want me to tell them what you’ve been up to myself?”

Donghyuck throws a cushion and misses. “Nothing’s new about me, guys. Nothing that’s interesting enough.” Then, he leans forward and turns to you. “Maybe Y/N has anything to say. I mean, she’s the one who’s been away the longest.”

It takes you aback, the interaction unexpected, and gets you stuttering. “I’m—There’s really nothing, I mean.”

Donghyuck laughs lightly. “Loosen up. You look like you’d rather be elsewhere but here.”

“It’s not like that,” you defend. “It’s just—jetlag.”

“Of course,” Donghyuck nods. “How long was the flight?”

“Twelve hours,” you answer. Renjun does his best, distracting everyone else with a new conversation so you and Donghyuck, you assume, would feel more comfortable rather than have everyone listen to you talking with the person you used to know the best. Jisung tries to subtly leave, pretending like he needs to go to the restroom, and you know it’s a tactic because you also know Jisung like the back of your hand.

Donghyuck immediately moves closer, taking the space Jisung used to sit on, the distance pulling the air out of your lungs.

“And my flight was delayed for a couple of hours because of a storm,” you continue, clearing your voice. “So, fourteen hours in total, plus one hour from Incheon to Gangnam.”

Donghyuck nods. “Well, you fly frequently.”

You nod back. “Not that frequently anymore. Since the pandemic, I’ve been working from home a lot; there was no need to travel after all. Or move to a different country. It turns out we can do everything virtually.”

Donghyuck chuckles, almost sarcastically. “What a shame that the entire world realized suddenly that everything could work virtually.”

You smile, sadly almost. “Yeah. What a shame.”

“I didn’t get the whole thing,” Jisung sighs. “What a shame. The last parts were the best.”

“You know Chenle’s going to kill you if he finds out you took a video, right?”

Jisung nods proudly. “That was the point.”

“Lia, wait,” Donghyuck’s voice echoes—not loud enough to catch anyone else’s attention, but definitely enough for you. You watch him follow Lia out.

You decide you’ve had enough. The wedding’s done now, anyway. There’s nothing left for you here.

Jisung looks at you. “Y/N.”

“Just need some space, Jisung,” you say. “I’m okay.”

“You’re lying,” You gasp, almost dropping your iPad upon Donghyuck’s revelation. “Holy shit, Donghyuck, that’s huge!”

“Never thought I’d hear that in another context but thanks, my love,” Donghyuck replies, a proud smile etched on his mouth. He reaches over and shows you a piece of paper, the confirmation of his participation in a convention in Shanghai a couple of weeks from now.

“Wait until Jaemin hears this,” You ramble, already on his phone to text said friend about the good news. “He’s going to throw a party for you.”

“You guys are too proud of me,” Donghyuck whines. “What if I end up being such a flop outside my comfort zone? There are going to be so many amazing artists out there. I heard some vocal majors from Konkuk are attending the conference with me, and I am already terrified of them. I can't imagine myself once I'm surrounded by even more talented and more intimidating singers."

You put down your tablet on your desk, sighing as you step closer towards Donghyuck. You’re in the apartment you share with Jimin, and Donghyuck called in earlier to tell you he’s got some great news. Neither of you really have much time to meet these days, with your internship at Seoul's biggest web developer company and the drastic changes in Donghyuck's schedule, it's a little too difficult to hang out in the safety of your apartment.

Donghyuck is evidently taken aback when you suddenly wrap an arm around his neck, tumbling when you pull him closer and kisses the air out of his lungs. You regret closing your eyes when your lips touch, thinking about the way Donghyuck looks like whenever you kiss him like this. Like Donghyuck's all you’ve ever needed. Like all the years of pining and hurting are expressed in a single kiss. Like it's everything you’ve always wanted and more.

It's not the first time you kiss—you’ve lost count you made out in the back of Jeno’s car two months ago while all your friends are drunk and out of their minds—but it always feels like it is.

Donghyuck's lips are soft, soft, soft, and you can never get enough of the kissing him. The first, featherlight, a little hesitant touch of your lips would be your second favorite part (the favorite is when Donghyuck's licking your mouth and nibbles on your lower lip), and his hands, his delicate hands would always be in your hair, pulling and pressing and touching.

It's perfect. Donghyuck pulls you down with him on your very own bed, letting you sit on his lap.

He's kissing you everywhere, your lips, your cheeks, your nose, your neck, your jaw, but he stops when you begin to unbutton his shirt. You look down on him, confused and eager and dazed, and usually, Donghyuck would give in without a single fight, but this time he stops you.

"What are we doing, Y/N?" Donghyuck lets out, like he's been holding this breath forever and now he's finally exhaling it.

"We're," you start, confused why he’s asking all of a sudden, but you don’t really have an answer to that. "We're—”

"Messing around. Having fun while we can," Donghyuck finishes, quoting your own words the first time you hooked up. "I know. But that was before, right? What about now? What are we doing now?"

Your hands drop on Donghyuck's side. Donghyuck quickly takes both of them in his, giving you a comforting squeeze, as if he's encouraging you to say something. To be brave. To let go.

"We can't go on like this if you don't answer me, Y/N," Donghyuck says softly. "I know what I want, and you know that it's you. Just you. From the beginning. As long as I live. And you are making me happy right now. But I need to know if this is what you want, too."

"Love, I wouldn't be doing this if I didn't want you," you explain, eyes wavering.

"Y/N, listen to me," Donghyuck urges, letting go of one of your hands to hold your face so you could look into each other's eyes. "Tell me now. Tell me now, honestly, if this is something you would want in the long run."

"Donghyuck," You sigh, like you’re begging for Donghyuck to stop asking. But Donghyuck doesn't let his guard down. He keeps his hands on you, waiting.

You want nobody else but Donghyuck, too. From the beginning. For as long as you live. And Donghyuck is making you happy, and you know well that Donghyuck will make you happy in the long run. The last two months of whatever game you’re playing had been fun. There was no agreement on being exclusive, no rules of some sort, and it all fell into place like you and him are supposed to end up like this. You hadn’t put a label on it, but you and Donghyuck are best friends for many years now. You went through growing pains together, survived each one of the flights you frequently took around the world, went to the same college together, and you don’t really see the point of rushing for a label now.

Because you have other things in mind other than what you feel right now. You have codes to master and board directors to impress. Donghyuck has auditions to pass and flights to catch as well, and now, an opportunity in Shanghai. Not to mention you’re both cramming to have the best credentials to get you the best job after graduation. Now is not really the best time.

So, just like many happenstances in your life, you come up with a stupid, stupid answer.

"I—I don't know, Donghyuck," you say nervously. "I mean, you're clearly making me happy. And I don't plan on seeing anyone else, but I haven't really gotten around to think about it."

Donghyuck takes his touch away all of a sudden. You reach out to hold his hands in place back to your face, but he lets go.

"Think about it?" Donghyuck asks, voice shaking. "What is there to think about? It's a simple question, Y/N. Do you want me for a long time or am I just some good fuck for you?"

"Donghyuck, why are you saying that?" you retort, angry now. "I just said you make me happy. And I'm not playing with you. I just—it's—with all the things going on in my life and yours, a relationship is not something I can maintain right now."

"Maintain?" Donghyuck chuckles, pulling his hands away, gently pushing you off his lap and standing away from your bed to put some space between you and him. "Y/N, we've been best friends since we were in high school. Literally nothing has changed for us except we kiss and fuck now. What is there to think about? I really do not understand."

You sigh. The sound of it makes Donghyuck pull away further until he’s picking up his backpack.

"Donghyuck, wait," You say, but Donghyuck is already out of his room, barefoot, his shoes in his hands.

Barefoot, his shoes in one hand, two bottles of beer on the other, Donghyuck finds you by the pool outside the wedding reception. He sits beside you and mimics the way you rolled the bottom of your dress up to your thighs so it doesn’t get wet and does the same with his expensive trousers.

“What are you doing out here?” you muse, eyes staring blankly at the way your feet look blurred out underwater. “Shouldn’t you be inside getting drunk and having the time of your life?”

Donghyuck chuckles, his cheeks painted like cherries, mouth glazed like strawberries, and hands you the cold bottle of beer. “I’m already drunk. Do you think I’d have the courage to come find you here if I was sober?”

You nod, taking the bottle from his hand. “Good point. Fun party?”

“Jaemin and Jeno never fail to organize the best party,” he stammers. “They used to invite everyone in their shared apartment to play the American games they learned from Johnny-hyung. I can’t believe they’re married now.”

Jaemin and Jeno, the very reason why all of you gathered after all these years, have always been destined for each other, and you know this because you’d seen them start off as nothing and watched them turn to everything. Their wedding had been the sole reason why you’d returned to Seoul.

“I always knew they’d end up together,” you mutter, drinking from the cold bottle. “I used to manifest it. I said it all the time I saw them together.”

Donghyuck giggles. “You used to believe in the law of attraction so much. You manifested everything that’s happened in your life.”

“I did, didn’t I?” you reply, tasting the bitterness coming from the drink, a reminder why you prefer any other drink aside from beer.

It’s quite for a minute until Donghyuck talks.

“Why didn’t you manifest us?” he says suddenly, words a little grumbled. He’s probably had too much to drink already. You hold onto him naturally as his head starts swaying until his head is leaning against your shoulder, close enough to hear each other breathing. “Y/N, why did you never say we’d end up together like this, too? You were so damn good with this law of attraction bullshit. You could’ve manifested our wedding, too.”

Donghyuck is drunk, and drunk Donghyuck is always vulnerable. His tone of voice is enough for you to decide to cut this trip shorter than it already is. A week, you had promised Jeno and Jaemin, you’d leave two days after the wedding. But at this moment, when you’re frozen in place, Donghyuck’s warmth touching your coldness, you begin to ponder if it had been a good idea to come back in Seoul at all.

You love Jeno and Jaemin and would do anything for them in a heartbeat. Therefore, when the couple announced their engagement two months ago, it had been a quick, solid yes, of course, I’ll be there because you wouldn’t miss their wedding for the world, even if it had been exactly four years and two months since the last time you’d breathed the air of Seoul and that you’d rather die than be in a 12-hour flight, you swore you’d be with your friends during such a huge chapter of their lives.

Your schedules were immediately reconstructed, a ticket to Seoul safely tucked in the files in your desk’s drawer, and all your friends from London were already asking you to bring something back from Seoul when your trip is over. It was all set, with the promise of checking in with your teammates from work during your one-week leave, and it was the easiest itinerary you’d ever made. What you failed to prepare, truly, is yourself.

Somehow, you knew this would happen. You knew coming back would mean seeing Donghyuck. And seeing Donghyuck means opening wounds you’re not certain have healed and resuming conversations you’d never wanted to go back to. And this means, at any given time Donghyuck is within your space, you’d be a goner.

Because four years, it turns out, isn’t enough to get over him.

Quite funny, if you think about it now, how after all these years, you’re still orbiting around him.

You clear your throat, no words coming out, and Donghyuck starts to fall asleep against your shoulder.

Your right shoulder feels sore after falling asleep on your side on Chenle’s couch the morning after Jaemin and Jeno’s bachelor party. It was crazy, to say the least, and you’d decided to drink your guts to in hopes of not remembering anything in the morning. It sucks because you’re stupidly hungover and you remember everything.

The group was divided into two. You, Renjun, Donghyuck, and Minjeong were in charge of Jaemin in the other side of the city, courtesy of Jung Jaehyun for sponsoring and personally planning the grand party for his favorite dongsaeng. Meanwhile, Jisung, Chenle, Mark, and Jimin had planned Jeno’s very own party, along with Lee Taeyong who funded the event.

If you’re being completely honest, you’d think that after college, your friends would lose their sparks in setting up amazing parties, but last night proved you wrong.

The alcohol was disgusting, but you like that it made Renjun do things he wouldn’t do sober. Jaemin refused to get shit-faced drunk because his wedding is in two days, his hangovers usually last an entire day—he doesn’t want to show up at his own wedding looking like a zombie. Minjeong, well, she’s Minjeong, so she was just all over the place, nagging and getting drunk. She’s also a snob who thinks so highly of herself despite being the youngest in the group and liked to look down on her older friends all while attempting to stand upright after downing five shots of tequila.

Donghyuck, however, decided to bring his new girlfriend. Her name is Lia. And the only goal last night was to stay as far away as possible.

You knew that the relationship was new because Jisung filled you in before you had all parted ways for the parties, said that Donghyuck started dating her two months ago right around the time Jaemin and Jeno got engaged, Jimin being their bridge because Lia and Jimin have been friends since last year. Apparently, Lia’s been interested with him for years now; she just never had the chance because like you, Donghyuck also disappeared in and out from Seoul for a couple of years until he’d decided to stay here for good two years ago.

You can’t remember how many shots you had and how many cocktails were handed to you last night, but you wish you had more because it was evidently not enough to erase the scenarios from last night. It wasn’t enough to blur out the memories of Donghyuck holding her, kissing her, dancing with her, and just all out being a lovey-dovey boyfriend.

It’s a relief that you got home safely. There was no designated driver because the plan was to really get drunk, so Jaehyun had one of his employees drive everyone to Chenle’s penthouse because it’s the closest. You hope the others returned to Jeno’s place safely, too.

You stay still from where you’re lying down, eyes up on the ceiling, wondering what time it is. There was no plan for today aside from wedding rehearsal at six in the evening to make sure everything’s all set for tomorrow, so you reckon you have the entire day to get rid of your hangover.

You roll over to your side, facing the television, and the clock tells you it’s eleven in the morning. Renjun is snoring away from the other couch, and you remember letting Minjeong sleep on your bed for the night. You’re staring at Renjun’s sleeping form when someone on the carpeted floor suddenly rolls over, allowing you to see their face.

Donghyuck’s sleeping on the floor beside the couch, body parallel to yours so you can see his peaceful sleeping face, mouth slightly agape. He’s now sleeping on his back, head supported by one of the cushions, body covered with his jacket from last night. You remember parting ways with him with him last night. He’d taken a taxi with Lia back to her place while the rest of you went home in Jaehyun’s SUV. You don’t remember him coming back here.

You stare at him for as long as you can, because in the last three days in Seoul, you’d never really gotten the chance to get a good look on him. You and him don’t follow each other from any social media, so the last four years had truly been radio silence from both sides. Donghyuck, at 27, doesn’t look like he’s aged that much, albeit his round cheeks being gone, replaced by prominent cheekbones. It looks like he never bothered to get rid of the constellations forming on his face and neck, too, because they’re still here, just like many things that haven’t changed. Donghyuck used to love dyeing his hair crazy colors, now his hair is just colored naturally. His lips, wonder if they still taste the same.

“He’s going to melt,” Renjun says suddenly, you plop your head back to the couch, guilty for staring too long. Renjun sits up, stretching and laughing at your misery. “And you’re going to have a heart attack if you keep sneaking glances and getting caught. How many times has Jisung caught you in the last 72 hours?”

“Shut up,” you mumble, getting up and stretching as well. “What do you want to eat for breakfast?”

You carefully get off from the couch, making sure you don’t topple on Donghyuck’s sleeping body, draping the blanket over his body, walking towards Chenle’s fancy kitchen. Renjun helps you, rummaging through the fridge, and comes up with a breakfast menu with whatever you had in the kitchen.

Donghyuck wakes up before you and Renjun could finish cooking everything. He’s quiet when he approaches you in the kitchen, softly asking if you could make coffee for him. You don’t say no, of course.

“This is the most disgusting cup of coffee, I’ve had my entire life,” Donghyuck complains, leaning over the counter where you’re working on the opposite side of. “Stop jeopardizing the café’s reputation. You’re not some scientist so stop mixing concoctions from hell just to brag that you’re a part-time barista and a full-time college student. You make me sick. Literally.”

You ignore all of it, of course, eyebrows furrowed as you take another sip of the quote and quote disgusting coffee, trying to figure out what went wrong this time.

“I think it needs a bit more vanilla,” you think out loud.

“I will not join you in this stupid crusade of making your own “Barista’s Special” recipe,” he continues. “And I will tell your manager you’re wasting coffee!”

“Aha!” you exclaim when you think you got it right. “Maybe I need to level the grounds better and add another pump of vanilla. Let me try that. It should taste better.”

Donghyuck chuckles as you move around and attempt to make another cup. “You’ve been saying it should taste better since last week.”

He keeps complaining, but takes the new cup of coffee as soon as you’re done.

Donghyuck drinks.

You wait.

It still tastes disgusting.

“It’s sweet,” Donghyuck comments when he drinks it. You tilt your head. Renjun is finishing up on the scrambled eggs. You hear Minjeong come out of your room.

“Is that a bad thing?” you ask, hopeful.

Donghyuck shakes his head, chuckling. “Better than the ones you made when we were in university.”

“Hey!” you laugh. “I was awarded employee of the month once!”

“That doesn’t erase the fact that you forced me to drink your disgusting concoctions for three weeks straight,” he states, making you laugh even more. “I guess, all these years you’d learned what you were missing.”

“I’ll miss you,” you mumble against Donghyuck’s chest. “The internship will just be for a few months. I’ll be back before you know it.”

Donghyuck kisses the top of your head. “When you come back,” he mutters. “When you come back, I’ll ask you to be my girlfriend.”

You freeze.

“And you’ll say yes. And we’ll graduate together and make a life for both of us.”

You pull away a little so that you’re looking at him face to face. Donghyuck has tears threatening to fall from his eyes. You wipe it off with the sleeves of his jacket you’re wearing.

“I’ll say yes,” you promise. “And we’ll graduate together and make a life for both of us.”

A woman’s voice announces your flight number once again and says the gates are closing in five minutes. Donghyuck kisses you in the mouth—a promise—and tells you he loves you.

“Oh, Donghyuck,” you say. “I love you, too.”

“Come back home to me, yeah?”

“I will.”

Yours and Donghyuck’s favorite restaurant was located two blocks away from his parents’ home. It closed a few years ago when its owner passed away and his children were too heartbroken to keep the business running. It was a staple from your entire high school life, and if you could say it, it defined your standards when it comes to food.

You’d just gotten a call from home that your childhood pet had to be put down because of old age and many diseases, and you called in sick for work—thank God, Johnny was willing to cover for you otherwise the manager would’ve rejected your request to stay at home for the day—and you’re truly not in the mood for anything at all.

You haven’t been home for quite sometime now, the last time being the holidays and you normally just spend a couple of days before heading back to the campus, so everything really sucks. You didn’t even get the chance to say goodbye.

Donghyuck hears this from Jimin, of course, because your roommate called him as soon as she heard you crying from your room. He literally carries you out of your room, says grieving is better when there’s food.

As soon as you see the person standing behind the counter, you recognize the place right away. Although located in a different street now, nearby where you are, the place looks exactly the same from when it did years ago.

“Y/N! Donghyuckie!” the lady behind the counter greets.

“Oh my,” you squeal. “Auntie, I didn’t know you’re back in business! How long has it been?”

The new owner, the late owner’s eldest daughter, smiles at you and tells you they re-opened sometime this year. She tells you to find a seat and confirms she knew your order by heart.

Donghyuck sits across you. “You like it?”

“Why did you not take me here sooner?”

He smiles. “Supposedly on your birthday a couple of weeks from now. But with what happened today, I guess this is the best time.”

“You’re the best.”

It’s Jisung and Chenle who find you and Donghyuck by the pool area hours later. Donghyuck had completely fallen asleep on your shoulder. The younger ones help you and practically carry Donghyuck towards the car.

Jaemin and Jeno have left the venue so they could prepare for their flight the next day. You hadn’t paid much attention to the time when Donghyuck drunkenly approached you. Jisung tells you it’s already two in the morning.

Chenle tells you Donghyuck had broken up with Lia—the reason, he’s uncertain—which is why she stormed off from the reception and Donghyuck decided to drink his ass off while you were wandering around the place. You shrug, acknowledging the news like it doesn’t make your heart race, like it doesn’t give you some sort of hope you didn’t know you had stored, and tell them they should take him home.

Jisung says Donghyuck lives on the other side of the city, so it’s best you all head back to Chenle’s.

Jisung and Chenle share the latter’s bed, and you’re not going to let Donghyuck sleep on the couch after he had complained about his back hurting when he’d fallen asleep on the floor the other day, so it’s only right that you let Jisung and Chenle carry him to your bed.

When you wake up on the couch the next day, Donghyuck’s shoes are no longer by the doorsteps.

His footsteps are loud.

“Donghyuck, this isn’t going to work if you don’t fucking give me a chance to explain!” You scream a few feet behind Donghyuck.

Donghyuck is running away, and you’re beginning to think that convincing him to go to the gym might not have been the greatest decision because Donghyuck is literally sprinting, like he’s being chased by something so terrifying.

You almost stop. Donghyuck, who always called him home, never ran away from you all these years. Not, it looks like he’d rather be anywhere but where you. Nothing feels worse than that.

You’d just gotten back from your internship in the US, one more term and you’re graduating. The internship was easily the best thing that’s happened to you this year. They were already thinking of offering you a contract as soon as you graduate. They let you go back home, of course, to complete your degree, and said they’d be willing to keep training you in the states and have you relocate to Europe once you graduate because they’ll be expanding their business out there.

It's also the night of Donghyuck's first showcase, the first show he's headlining along with musicians and artists from different universities. You had promised Donghyuck you’d watch and support him, but things doesn't always go on your favor, because as soon as you’d landed, you were needed back to the campus for an interview for the university’s publishing team because they wanted you to talk about your experience alongside the others who went to the states to complete their internship. It was supposed to be an hour session, but you and everyone in the panel liked the questions they were asking, and somehow you felt like this was a sign that the company in the US could lead to better, brighter things for you.

Hence, you were late. Halfway through the show. Donghyuck got mad, but promised he understood. He asked for some space, at least for the rest of the night. But you wanted to apologize properly, to take him out for dinner even if it's already past midnight, and insisted that you should talk about it. Donghyuck refused, you kept insisting, until the former said something about you being a shitty girlfriend.

It’s a shitty excuse, but you were absolutely fucking tired. You’re still jetlagged from the 16-hour difference, and the entire session with your fellow interns took two hours of your day.

What you had left for the day was so little, and you chose to spend it with Donghyuck, but he decided to be an ass about it.

"I never said anything about being your girlfriend," was your dumb reply, which is why you’re now running after him from the building of Chenle’s condominium.

You pull Donghyuck with force as soon as you catch up with him, and you’re faced with your worst fear.

Donghyuck is crying. He’s never cried before, not because of you. A deep painful breath comes out of your mouth, and it hurts when you breathe, like inhaling a cloud of smoke or being hit by a ball in the back. Donghyuck keeps crying, doesn’t even hide it. He sobs and heaves and he doesn’t wipe his tears.

"Donghyuck, can you just—”

“I’m tired,” Donghyuck sobs. “Y/N, I’m so tired. I sound pathetic and I’m not sure if I’m exhausted from the performance or I’m just done with you.”

“I’m sorry,” is all what you could come up with.

“This,” Donghyuck says, gesturing the small space between you. “I don’t think it’s worth all of the pain I am feeling right now, Y/N. You’re my best friend. I—I, fuck, I used to think that maybe someday this will all be worth it, but I am tired of waiting for that day. I am drained and you have consumed all of me. I waited for you, and I keep waiting until you finally just—let go and decide you want to be with me and stop playing this never-ending game of friends with benefits bullshit we started. I’m done. What else do you want from me?”

“I—I… Donghyuck,” you stutter. I want you to give me a chance. I want you to give me more time to figure some things out myself. I want you to wait a little longer.

"I rejected Ryujin a week before you came home,” Donghyuck confesses. "When you were in the states, and you suddenly changed your mind about being my girlfriend and told me I should go out and date other people and that I shouldn’t hold myself back, I was angry. I didn’t understand why you were pushing me away so much when I’m here!”

You stay still, crying.

“I’m here,” he repeats. “I’m here and I love you, and I’ve never asked anything in return. And you tell me you love me, but you do things that—that hurt me. Every time I think we’re finally going somewhere, you—you push back and I’m just—I’m sick of it. And Jaemin said I should just move on if you can’t make up your mind because I don’t know if you haven’t realized it but Y/N, we’ve been at it for years.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Jeno and Jaemin set me up with Ryujin,” he continues. “We went to a couple of dates. And then you called me saying you’re coming back home. So, I broke it off before we even got started. I told her it would be unfair if I kept leading her on when I know that I am still ridiculously in love with you. She said it would be alright and that she's giving me all the time and space I need to think about things."

Donghyuck curses and continues, "But I didn't need time and space, Y/N. Because I already knew that all I've ever wanted was you. I didn't need to think. I only needed you."

You don’t know what to say. You’re still holding him by his arm.

“If you're not going to say anything, let me go,” Donghyuck sternly says. You have a feeling it’s not the grip on his arm that Donghyuck is talking about. “Please.”

The single biggest mistake of your life happened on the third street from Chenle’s place, under the broken streetlight, across the ice cream parlor Donghyuck used to work at when he was seventeen.

You let him go. Donghyuck stops waiting.

The wait from the audience was long enough.

They say your graduation day is going to be one of the happiest moments in your life. It’s not. Not at all.

Not when you’d gotten your diploma on stage and Donghyuck shows you he doesn’t give a fuck by looking everywhere else. Not when it’s picture taking time with your friends and families and he decides to stand on the other side, far, far away from you. Not when his parents ask him to take a picture with you and he shrugs it off and says he’s hungry and that he’s meeting everyone at the restaurant, leaving with his entire family.

Renjun whispers, “Does he even know you’re leaving first thing in the morning?”

You shrug it off, too. “Looks like he has other things to care about.”

Jaemin sighs. “You’re not serious about this, are you? You and Donghyuck better pull your shit together. Both of you already ruined the moment for everyone.”

Renjun eyes him. “It’s not your fault, Y/N. If Donghyuck doesn’t want to listen, then so be it.”

“It’s not Donghyuck’s fault either,” Jaemin defends. “Because he’s been trying to get answers and you wouldn’t give it to him. So, I don’t think it’s his fault that he’s done.”

“We’re not picking sides here, Jaemin,” Jeno says. “Let’s go.”

Jeno and Jaemin sandwiches you in a tight hug.

The next day after the wedding, in the afternoon, the newlyweds are bound to France for their honeymoon. They’re traveling the continent for two weeks (unfortunately, London excluded from their itinerary), and all of you decided to drop them off as if they’re leaving for years. In your case, this may be the last time you’re seeing them for a long time.

“I love you,” Jaemin says as the two very strong and buff men hug you. “I know things have been tough and coming back here took a lot from you, but thank you for making sure you were present during the wedding.”

“I hope this isn’t the last time in another four years that we’d see you in person,” Jeno adds. “We miss you, you know? Please come visit us when you have time.”

“I love you two so much,” you cry, emotional with the way they’re holding you. “Go have fun.”

They bid their goodbyes to everyone else and enter the airport.

“If I don’t get the same treatment when I leave, I’m ghosting everyone,” Mark announces. Jisung laughs. “What? You all acted like they’re going away for two years. They’re coming back in literally and exactly two weeks!”

“Go be unhappy somewhere, hyung,” Donghyuck teases, making everyone laugh as you all walk back to where their cars are parked.

Chenle needs to go back to work, so did Jimin and Jisung, hence they ride all together. Minjeong’s visiting a friend, so she’s riding with Mark and Renjun because they’re all going to the same side of the city. Which means, Donghyuck is driving you back to Chenle’s place.

“Your flight is tomorrow, too, right?” Mark asks. You hum, nodding. “Come visit me in Vancouver sometime soon, too. Or I’ll fly to London.”

“Wow, you have a lot of money to spend on flying around the world multiple times, huh?” you tease.

“Hey, you’re the frequent flyer here,” he comments. “Wonder how many miles you’ve earned and redeemed from all this flying you’ve done in this lifetime.”

You laugh. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Mark.”

Renjun and the others bid you goodbye. You’re not really certain why you and Donghyuck silently agreed to watch your friends leave, you and him standing a foot away from each other as they all drive away. For some reason, it feels like the last time.

The first time it happened, you and Donghyuck decide it’s an accident.

You were drunk, and it had been a while for the two of you considering how busy you both have been because of finals coming up. It was convenient, if you say so yourself, to have your best friend right beside you when you were feeling hot and horny. The morning after was settled with a kiss on your forehead—no apologies as discussed, because neither you nor him regretted it anyway, but there’s a promise that nothing changes.

The second time it happened, you and Donghyuck decide it’s not going to be a one-time thing.

“So, to make it clear,” you huff as you quickly get rid of your pants while Donghyuck pulls his shirt off. “This isn’t a one-time thing.”

“I don’t see an issue if it’s not,” he replies, unbuckling his belt and pulling his pants down, pushing you against the wall and kissing you down your neck. “Besides, we’re best friends.”

You lean your head against the wall, thinking if it’s too late to back out, but Donghyuck’s already has his hands all over you—one on your breast and the other on your waist. It’s not really that bad of an idea. Donghyuck is your best friend, and your friendship has withstood time, distance, growing pains, and mostly everything. And perhaps it’s the way you haven’t stopped thinking about your first time together that’s making you feel so, so vulnerable under his touch, but it’s not like anything’s changed since that night. In fact, if you’re being completely honest, it made you feel like you and Donghyuck know each other better now—in ways that other pairs like you don’t.

Hence, whatever thought you had a minute ago, you throw it down the drain and you let Donghyuck (messily, heartedly giggling) carry you by hoisting you up and wrapping your legs around his waist and bring you back to his unmade bed.

Donghyuck knows how to use his tongue, and you’ve kind of always known because all the girls he’s ever slept with talk about him like he’s a god of tongue or something. Donghyuck licks your lips before diving in, as if he’s giving you a taste of what you’re about to have, and he pushes his tongue in, massaging it with yours, and it almost feels like he’s teaching you how to use the muscle in your mouth. You realize how much he likes kissing, because he kisses more than he touches. He kisses you for what felt like hours, and you’re not about to complain about it.

You let him gently drop you on his bed. His warm palms caressing its way from your waist down to the side of your thighs where he knows you like being touched the most (and you’re not certain whether he’d learned this from stories or from the time you and him had sex); Donghyuck keeps his mouth on you as he rubs circles against your hot skin.

The finger he slips between your underwear and right above your clit sends you shivers down your spine. He allows you to catch your breath for a second, moving his mouth from your lips down to your neck, but doesn’t give you enough time to recover because he rubs your clit oh, so gently.

“We’re best friends,” he repeats, murmuring the words against the skin on your neck. “Nothing changes, except now I know where to touch you.”

He does. He touches you everywhere and slips his middle finger in your hole, sighing against your skin when he feels how wet you’ve gotten simply from kissing.

“You’ve always been such a good girl for me,” he whispers, keeping his finger inside, his palm pressed against your clit. “Such a good girl. Wet and ready for me. You really are my best friend.”

“Donghyuck,” you whine. He starts rubbing from inside, moving a single finger in an upward motion, eliciting a moan from you.

“What?” he asks innocently. “You are. You are my best friend. I don’t think everyone can say they let their best friends fuck them when they’re horny. Which makes me the best best friend, too. Because I fuck the brains out of you when you’re horny. Aren’t we the best team the world has ever seen?”

Donghyuck slips another finger in—easily, because nothing can describe how we you are now. He tongues the skin on your collarbone, licking and tasting and smirking all throughout, then he fingers you properly. At this point, your underwear’s stretched from one thigh to the other.

Donghyuck likes to tease you, and you know this because he massages the inside of your hole in a swift upward motion before pulling his fingers out and slowly filling you again. He does this slowly, then fast, then slowly once again. The explicit sound of your wetness makes him chuckle, leaving your collarbones and using his other hand to pull the left cup of your bra down and goes in. He bites and nips and licks and sucks your breast while he fingers you stupid—legs apart, shamelessly wet and fucking ready for him—and you take everything he gives you.

He doesn’t make you cum though, because Donghyuck is Donghyuck. Nobody is more cunning than him.

But he doesn’t make you wait. As soon as he feels you’re about to cum, he slips his fingers out and rids himself off his own underwear, then slipping the last two pieces barely hanging on your body.

He fucks you dumb. Raw. All his glory and skin. You have no other words aside from that.

He doesn’t wait because there’s truly no need to adjust with how wet and ready you fucking are. He’s big, but Donghyuck knows how to fuck well. He knows how to prevent discomfort and he’s done a very good job at proving that to you.

He fucks you missionary, and usually, this isn’t something you’d opt for. You like being fucked hard with no sense of affection and all that bullshit when you’re stressed and in need of some kind of relief. But with Donghyuck, it’s heavenly despite how sinful his hips snap.

He fucks you. Again and again. He makes you cum twice before he pulls out and spills himself on your stomach.

He kisses you, giggles at the way you’re dumbfounded, cleans you up, and lets you sleep on his bed as though nothing has changed.

Because nothing did. Nothing ever will.

“Funny how things have changed so much in the last four years, huh?” Donghyuck asks, eyes on the road.

Donghyuck’s said he’s driving you home. You haven’t been in Seoul in four years, but the route he’s taking is definitely not the way to Chenle’s.

“We’re taking the long way home,” he interjects when he realizes you’re looking at the GPS on his car’s tablet. “There’s, uh, heavy traffic on the usual way because of some road construction. And you’re going back tomorrow. You haven’t really gone around the city, so I figured it’d be a good time.”

You hum, looking at him with a small smile.

“Sure,” you buy. “It feels like only yesterday you were driving a beat-up Hyundai. Now, you’re all fancy.”

He chuckles, turning as his car speeds through the bridge. “Well, many things have changed since you left.”

Donghyuck looks beautiful like this: Seoul’s horizon running like a movie as he drives, smile soft, eyes bright.

“I’m sorry,” you brave up.

It takes you great courage to say it out loud. As best friends, you and Donghyuck had always said “thank you,” and “I love you” openly, and in countless of occasions, these words have healed scratches made around your friendship. Rarely you and him would ever say you’re sorry. The only time you can remember apologizing to him was the night, a few weeks before graduation when you’d just returned from the States after your internship. That sorry barely made up the wounds you’d caused.

At this age, you understand why saying sorry wasn’t normal for you and Donghyuck. You and him were inseparable. You were soulmates—are if you can bravely say it out loud. Your bond is stronger with him than anyone else, and you’d always believed that nothing could ever come between you and him. Like the decisions you’d made, nothing changed until something did. And when things changed, you and him had no idea what to do. Because as far as you can remember, you and Donghyuck remained constant, like a routine, a bible with a comprehensive and cohesive series of stories that’s never changed. So, when feelings got in between—denial and pining and confusion—neither of you had any idea how to handle it.

Donghyuck was bold and brave. You, on the other hand, had no ounce of courage to give it a try.

He only smiles. “A few years too late, don’t you think?”

You nod. “I know. Do you accept my apology?”

“If you buy me ice cream,” he answers.

“Done,” you say, smiling back at him. “I was scared.”

Donghyuck keeps his eyes on the road. “Of?”

“That I’d come back to Seoul and see you married with kids and all.”

“And what’s so scary about that?”

“Because it would mean I’d thrown away all the chances the universe has given me.”

Donghyuck looks ethereal like this: in a suit, smiling as he watches his bride walk down the aisle.

“Take care, yeah?” Renjun whispers as he hugs you.

Mark’s Dad and Mark himself are waiting for you outside. As most of your friends have gone home to their families after graduation, with the exception of Renjun and Jisung who spared some time today just to see you off, Mark volunteered (his dad) to drop you off the airport.

“I will,” you say, burying your face into his chest. “Any word from Donghyuck?”

Renjun pulls away and looks down. You know the answer.

“It’s okay,” you answer, mostly to yourself. “He’ll call me back soon. I’m sure.”

“I hope so,” Renjun mumbles.

The only call you get before you enter the gates is a drunken one. It’s Donghyuck.

“I hate you,” he grits through the device. “And I never want to see you again.”

“I didn’t want to come back,” you confess. Donghyuck keeps his hands on the steering wheel. “Because you’d said you never wanted to see me again.”

“And I sent you messages you never received,” Donghyuck says. It surprises you. “Because your Korean number was no longer active and you’d blocked me from everything at that time.”

You smile, wondering if you had a little bit more understanding—if you had waited a little before deactivating your old number, if you had given it some time—would you and Donghyuck end up together in the end? If Donghyuck hadn’t been drunk the night you left Seoul—if he’d taken a taxi before you boarded the plane, if he’d just said sorry back—would you and him have gotten into a relationship right away?

Regret, just like grief, makes you feel things like this. They make you wonder what could have happened, if it would’ve given you the same, awful outcome, or if it would take you to the happy ending you keep dreaming about.

“Funny how we had many things we couldn’t say despite us being best friends,” he comments. “And you agree that many things have changed in the last four years, right?”

You hum, looking out your window, watching the horizon blur in motion.

“Donghyuck-ah,” you whisper, eyes still on the moving horizon. “The only thing that hasn’t changed for me.”

“What?” he asks.

“You,” you say. “You’re the only one that hasn’t changed for me. You’re still sharp when you need to be, but gentle where people you love need you to be. You’re still beautiful like the day I had realized I loved you. It wasn’t shocking, though. That day. I wasn’t all too shocked that your newly-dyed pink hair was the eureka moment for me. Because I knew all along. It was more like a flick on the wrist rather than a surprise. Like it’s always been there. The pink hair was just a reminder.”

Donghyuck stays quiet.

“And I say this like I’m hoping I could go back to four years ago and try harder to apologize,” you continue, tears already brimming your eyes. “But I guess we needed this, Donghyuck. We needed to grow—sadly—apart. And I feel like, no, I know that I wouldn’t have gotten to know myself better if we didn’t grow apart.”

“Yeah,” he speaks for what seems like a long time. “We were—you were right all along. We couldn’t just risk it all for a relationship. I had offers left and right even before we’d graduated, and you.”

You look at him. Donghyuck’s eyes are carefully still on the road, but his gaze is soft, eyes shining from the tears welling up.

“You were made to see the world,” he says, and it breaks you like glass. “I wouldn’t have forgiven myself if I were the reason why you don’t have the life you have now. Because it wouldn’t have worked. I love you, and I just know that at that time, when we were young and all, I wouldn’t have let you go work abroad. The few months you spent in the state for a mere internship already shook our friendship in ways we didn’t expect. What more if we had been in a relationship?”

“Donghyuck,” you sniffle. “I love you. And it hurt. And I’m sorry it us this long. I’m sorry it took me this long.”

“Stop apologizing. Y/N, I would’ve let you go eventually,” he confesses. “Because I love you so much that I’d be willing to let you go if it meant you could soar.”

The sun sets in the horizon the next time you look out your window.

Donghyuck keeps one hand on the wheel and shows you the other, palm up.

You take it with courage.

And you. You look beautiful like this: dressed in white, smiling as you walk towards your groom. You best friend. Donghyuck.

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the-californicationist · 5 months

Text

The Fourth of July

Another gift fic for another awesome friend of mine! Stockings are getting stuffed left and right this year. <3 <3

Alex/FReader - foreign reader, blowjob/Facefuck, spit kink, soft!Alex

You are celebrating your first July 4th with Alex and his friends at your brother's lake house. Seeing the booming fireworks, eating hotdogs, and drinking out of those red solo cups - just like the movies - has been so much fun. But, you and Alex get a little carried away in the pool house.

MDNI/18+

AO3 Link

When he picked you up for the party, Alex looked like he was Mr. USA. His fluorescent blue swim trunks were short, the hem sitting high on his huge, muscular thighs, showing off his carbon fiber leg. The arms of his old Army tee shirt were sliced open, giving you a view of his endless, tanned skin. His ribs and abs rippled beneath the surface as he parked the Silverado in the road and hopped out of it to greet you.

You’d never wanted to run your hands through a shock of hair so badly in your life, buried under a bright red trucker cap with the bill turned backwards. He was smacking his gum loudly, and he was already sunburnt across his nose.

“Hey, there. You ready for some freedom?”

You smiled, enjoying his American accent,

“As ready as I’ll ever be, I think.”

“C’mon. Your brother’s waitin’ for us at the house. Got about fifty pounds of barbeque workin’ on the pit, I’ll bet.”

He grabbed your bag and threw it into the back of his truck before grabbing your arm and helping you into the lifted cab of the vehicle. Your swimsuit coverup billowed in the wind, and he gently gathered it up for you, moving it away so it wouldn’t get caught in the heavy door.

Alex pulled himself into the driver’s seat, flexing his tattooed forearms as he settled into position, gripping the wheel tightly. As you looked closer, you started to notice little scars, nothing major. But, you were always quick to forget what his day job was: CIA war machine. He threw on a pair of hot-pink sunglasses with a floater neck strap attached, and handed you his spare pair. You slipped them on, feeling much cooler than you thought you should. As you pulled onto the road, he cranked up the music until you couldn’t even hear yourself think.

You took the opportunity of being bathed in sound to study him from across the center console of the truck. The landscape of America - strip centers and wooded fields - rushed by you unadmired, and you were trapped by him. You thought you’d gotten away with a long, delicious appraisal, but he flipped his glasses down his nose and peeked over them at you. The look in his eye made you blush.

He turned the music down and stared at you while the huge truck idled at a red light. His voice was nice and even as he asked,

“What are you lookin’ at, darlin’?”

“Nothing,” you tried to be dismissive, playing coy but doing it badly.

An enormous, rough hand grabbed you around your knee,

“Nothin’? Like what you were wearin’ in that snap you sent me last week, nothin’?”

You blushed pink. The light turned green. Alex stayed staring at you, squeezing your leg, until someone behind him honked, and even then he took his sweet time.

“Mmhm,” you said, waiting for his next move as he drove onward, revving the truck’s angry engine.

“Did you tell him yet?” Alex asked, threading his fingers through yours as you captured it from your lap..

“No,” you laughed under your breath, “I think you’d have known by now if I had.”

He laughed with you, readjusting his cap,

“I think I’d have a black eye by now.”

You grimaced in reply, knowing your brother’s temper. He wouldn’t be thrilled to see you flirting with his best friend from when he was enlisted. Alex saw you frown, and he held your hand a little tighter, saying,

“Worth it.”

You drew in a tight breath and looked over at him. His gaze stayed on the road this time, pushing the speed limit, taking the exit to the lake.

You’d known Alex Keller ever since your brother moved to Clearwater. Your brother, Charlie, had studied at university and he had fallen in love with a man who was in Alex’s old regiment. They’d gotten married, and now, Charlie had his green card and everything. All of Alex’s friends and army buddies had brought Charlie into the fold. He was even driving a Ford F-150 these days. If it wasn’t for his Kiwi accent, he could’ve passed as a true American.

You tried to come over to see Charlie and his husband, Greg, every summer. But, with the restrictions in place, it had been a few years. This would be a happy reunion as long as he didn’t discover the relationship blooming between you and his best friend, Alex.

It had been an accident, really. Charlie had lost his phone, and Alex had called you by accident, trying to find it. Then, you had just…kept calling. They were late night talks for you, and early morning talks for him, but you and Alex just seemed to have so much to say to each other. When he flew out to Urzikstan for dangerous missions, or over to Russia to do God knows what, he would always send you back some little trinkets from his trip.

You knew it was a lie. You knew, in your heart, that he had been over there killing people and saving the world from whatever horrors were terrorizing those deep, dark places. But, when you got a little glass camel figurine in the mail, its box covered in a million stamps, you put it on your window sill and watched the light dance through it like it hadn’t been shipped from some sort of master of war. But, if you were truly honest with yourself, you didn't give a shit.

You’d been talking for about six months now, and the build up to your trip was intense. The anticipation was killing you both. Seeing him now, feeling the bones of his hand in yours as you massaged the tiny muscles inside of his palm, it was all too much. You needed Charlie to understand that you had fallen madly in love with his best friend.

“I think we should tell him,” Alex said, interrupting your thoughts.

“Shit,” you scoffed, “He’s gonna lose it.”

“I don’t want to keep hiding you away. And maybe…” you heard the familiar tones of doubt in his throat, “Maybe I’m not the kind of man your brother wants for you. But, I can be.”

You kissed the back of his hand, letting the tiny hairs tickle your skin. The lake house wasn’t far, but you wanted to reassure him more than just chaste affection.

“I’m eager to see the kind of man you can be,” you turned the seduction up to eleven, hoping he wouldn’t immediately laugh at you.

He didn’t laugh. If anything, other than a flash of panic in his eyes, he didn’t move. He allowed you to flip his hand over, its wide palm facing the sky as you planted kiss after kiss onto his skin. You felt his breathing quicken, rippling through his limbs. Finally, you took his forefinger into your mouth and began to gently suck on its tip. It was salty, and probably unclean, but you didn’t care. You kept going, moving your mouth up and down his thick digit as if it were his cock. And goddamn did you want it to be his cock.

The phone calls had turned flirtatious, and then downright lascivious, in the last few months. Once, while he was hiding in a bunker somewhere in Ukraine, he’d called you, desperate. You listened to him as he pulled hungrily on his cock, letting you listen to the wet slipping sounds of his fist pounding into his skin, searching for release. He’d begged for your mouth. He said it was all he could think about, and the gorgeous little whimpering noises he made had set it in your mind. You dreamed about blowing him for weeks. You thought about how his come would taste when you had been sitting in the terminal and waiting on your plane. You were going to suck the life out of Alex Keller at this fucking party tonight if it was the last thing you ever did.

“Oh,” his voice was shaking and quiet, “Fuuuuuck.”

One more strong suck on his finger and you let him loose, wiping away the wetness with your hand, lacing your fingers back through his as if nothing had happened.

His breathing was ragged, and his hand was trembling. The lake house was just up ahead, and as Alex pulled into the drive, he took his hand back from your grip to adjust his growing cock. It looked heavy, and you couldn’t stop staring.

“Holy shit,” he sighed, “Charles is gonna kill me.”

“I won’t let him,” you smiled.

“That mouth…” he was still turned on, and his voice was deepened by his arousal.

“Wait til you see what else it can do,” you grinned and popped open your door to greet Charlie.

Your brother was in a black apron and carrying a set of tongs. He was at least six and a half feet tall and built like an ox. The back of his neck was red from the sun, and he wore his hair up in a poorly coiffed bun. You shut the truck door and he turned around. When he saw you, his face lit up, and he shouted your name across the yard.

“Kia ora, sister. Look at you! How’s the Air B&B?”

Charlie held you close to his body, hugging you so tight that it hurt. You let it hurt.

“Fine. I’m starving.”

“It’s coming. Where’s Alex?”

“Grabbing the bags, I think.”

You turned back around and watched as Alex bent into the truck bed and pulled your bag out along with his. He’d let his sunglasses fall around his neck and walked over to you and Charlie.

“Charles,” Alex smiled, dropping a bag to shake your brother’s hand.

“Alex, thanks for picking her up. Greg and the boys are down at the dock.”

You spent the day jet skiing and swimming with Alex and all of your brother’s friends. The girlfriends and wives and husbands all introduced themselves, or reintroduced themselves if they had met you before, and Alex stuck by your side through it all. He could have easily abandoned you to go on the fishing trip that most of the other men were keen to take, or he could have hung around Charlie all day since it had been months since they’d seen each other, too. But, he didn’t. He seemed to know that you didn’t want to be alone, and he held you to him in as much as he dared.

It would be a lie, though, if you two didn’t admit to sharing a stray touch or even a kiss every now and then. You kept finding excuses to be alone together.

Finally, it was nearly fireworks time, and Greg was setting up the array of them. The purple dusk was just settling on the horizon, and you and Alex had front-row seats. He had brought you another icy beer from the cooler, and a towel from inside the house to sit on. You’d positioned yourselves right next to the small pool house, a little away from the crowd.

The pool house was little more than a small bedroom and a toilet, but it was big enough to block anyone from seeing you two from behind. That way, if someone was looking at you, you’d know it. The excitement of hiding your affection from everyone was exhilarating.

You had worn your bright pink triangle bikini, and Alex had spent most of the day staring at it. You’d even made him retie the bows a few times, just to torture him. Once, he’d even managed to swipe a finger over your nipple, so you knew that once everyone’s eyes were focused on the exploding sky, it was on.

Other houses on the lake were popping their own fireworks, and there was a man who was famous for his end-of-the-night show. As Charlie lit more and more of the small ones, you noticed the other houses following suit. It was pretty, and every time a mortar cracked in the sky, you could feel it in your chest.

Once it became dark enough, you started to rub your hand up and down Alex’s bare thigh. He scooted closer and closer to you like a dog begging for more pets. You obliged him, running your fingers higher and higher until you were disturbing the hem of his shorts. Then, you went for it.

He felt you move your hand to the warm flesh between his legs, and he whispered,

"No, no, wait...oh, fuck..."

You put your hand through the stretchy leg of the nylon trunks and searched for his heavy cock and balls. You ignored his dick at first, rubbing his balls gently, moving them around in your hand, massaging them and feeling his dick fighting for attention above your wrist.

“Holy fucking shit, woman,” he hissed, fidgeting in his seat, his eyes turned skyward as he gasped as quietly as he could.

“You enjoying the show?” You asked, acting very casual.

“Enjoying…Jesus Christ,” Alex furrowed his brow at you and wiped a hand down his face. His eyes shone blue and then green and then red as the colors burst above you.

Finally, you wrapped your fingers around his swollen rod, nearly three times as large as it had been soft, and started to pump up and down slowly and deliberately. He let out a trembling breath.

“Baby, baby, baby, please…ah, please.”

“What do you need, Alex?” You whispered, kissing his neck, “Tell me. I wanna hear it.”

“I need your mouth, baby. Please, I’ll do anything,” he kissed you back, his mustache and beard tickling your skin, sending chills down your arms.

You looked over your shoulder at the pool house, and he followed your gaze. Then, you looked back down at the dock and saw Charlie and Greg untangling a huge fireworks display. You had time.

“C’mon,” you stood up quietly and opened up the door to the pool house.

The two of you snuck in and shut it behind you, still able to see through the small skylight as the fireworks were going off outside. You didn’t wait for him to get settled. In fact, you grabbed Alex by the arm and pulled him into the small room, sinking to your knees on the well-worn rug. You looped your fingers in the waistband of his shorts, and pulled them down. His cock flagged free, bobbing up and down, and he was as hard as a stone.

“Holy fuck! Wait, wait…oh, fuck!” He tried to catch his balance, and set his hands on your shoulders.

You stared at his hard length, admiring the velvety smoothness of his skin, looking at his bare, pink head. You could see the scar from his circumcision, and you ran your tongue along the dark line of skin, licking him up and onto his plump, uncovered head. The sound he made from your first contact would be burned into your brain forever. It was a low, dark growl mixed with a sigh that seemed like he had just been relieved from carrying the whole world on his shoulders. Maybe he had.

You took him into your mouth achingly slowly, looking up at him the entire time you did so, watching his face contort into different stages of blissful agony. He had one hand in his hair, pulling on it at the roots, his hat knocked back, looking like he was in shock. You swallowed him deeper, opening and closing your throat with swallow after swallow, making more and more drool pool in your mouth as you did until it was running out of your lips and down onto your chest.

Then, you began to bob your head back and forth along as much of his length as you could take, choking yourself with it until it hurt just a little. You tried to relax. You wanted to show him that you could take it all, that you could be his relief.

You focused on his head, running your tongue over its crest, tasting his salty precome as you lapped over his hole, rubbing the slick back and bumpy front of your tongue across it over and over and over. You used your hand to pump him up and down as you did, shaking him vigorously while he was sucked into your mouth.

Then, just as you were finding a steady, beating rhythm, he took your head in his hands and pulled you off of him. He was panting and ferocious when he whispered to you,

“Oh, my fucking God, baby. You don’t have to —”

“I want to,” you insisted, wrapping your hands behind your thighs and pulling his cock into your lips again. You kissed his head like it was his mouth, making out with his cock, covering him in your spit.

You felt him take one of the strings of your bikini in his hands and tug. Your top fluttered down, exposing your breasts to the dark room. You moaned.

When you did, he stumbled forward, losing his balance,

“Shit. Baby, I can't...” he begged, catching himself on the side of the end table, his knuckles white and straining to hold up his weight.

“I’ll let you sit,” you said cheekily, “If you hold my hair for me.”

“Oh, God,” he sank to the bed and laced his fingers through your hair, grabbing the back of your skull.

You sucked him harder, moaning as you did so, playing with your nipples and feeling your drool run down your chin.

Alex’s hand was only loosely connected, and you wanted more from him. You pulled away again and looked up at him with the biggest doe eyes you could muster,

“Alex,” you had his attention like a bright fire, “Fuck my face. Please.”

A snarl came out of his mouth, and he had to put himself back together before he answered you. He used his big hands to pet your hair out of your face, running a thumb across your wet bottom lip with tender care,

“I don’t wanna hurt you, baby. This feels so good. I don’t need you to -”

“I need you to. I wanna feel you in my throat.”

“Are you trying to kill me?”

“Only a little,” you smiled and licked the tip of him again, teasing him.

“If I hurt you, pinch me. Hard.”

You nodded, taking him as deep as you could. Then, when you reached your limit, you felt his hands get tight, shoving you down past your mouth and into your throat. He was still so gentle with you as he moved himself inside of you, fucking you ever so slowly, waiting for your pinch. So, you started to moan and lick and pull him closer with your hands, pushing yourself to the point of gagging.

He yanked you off of him in a hurry, thinking you were injured. A long, frothy line of drool came out with him, and you spit the rest onto his shaft and returned him to your mouth. Now that you knew that you could go that deep with help, you tried to do it without, and you nearly succeeded.

Alex was a complete mess above you, and his moans had become high, whining whimpers. With every swallow, with every lick, you earned a new noise. A gasp, a curse, a shaking cry. You played him like an instrument. Loudly.

Finally, you took him all the way in, past even where he had dared to push you, and you buried your nose in his crotch, smelling his hair and sweat and skin.

“Oh, fucking shit! Fuck that’s deep. Oh, God. Oh, God! Baby!”

He was unraveled like a ball of string, spilling out everywhere. His body betrayed his politeness, and he thrust himself into you once, twice. You watched as the rockets and cannons and mortars all exploded around you in a fiery, rainbow crescendo, he came down your throat, crying for you, whimpering your name, gasping through gritted teeth.

You counted to ten, trying not to gag, feeling his cock pulsing in your mouth, beating like a heart. Then, you started to get light-headed. So, you pulled back, releasing him in a slobbery, wet mess of come and spit.

You leaned forward into his lap and began to lick him clean. He shuddered as you did so, shaking and moaning as your tongue touched all of his sensitive places. You saved his head for last. Licking up and down his shaft, cleaning his come from him, tasting his body’s sweet, sticky release. Until finally, you looked up at him with a sly smile.

He looked down at you in dumb shock as you sucked all the fluid away from his swollen head, and he gasped as you finished the job. You released him with a pop from your lips and smiled, sitting back on your heels and playing with your tits.

Alex lay on the bed for a while, and you joined him, rubbing his skin under his cutoff tee. He rolled onto his side and greedily suckled on your nipples, kissing your mouth and neck affectionately, fondling you a little more aggressively than you expected. Then, he looked up at the door and back down at you,

“Will you still want me after your brother breaks my nose?”

You laughed, rolling your eyes,

“Sure, I will.”

“Then, wait here, baby. I’ll be right back.”

#call of duty fanfic #cod mw2 #cod mwii #alex keller #alex keller x reader #alex keller smut #alex keller cod #call of duty modern warfare 2 #cod

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gffa · 1 year

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Hey, hi, cool, so I just thought, for no reason that I can think of at this particular time, you all might want to fall back into the Kalluzeb rabbit hole with me, especially since they didn't get onscreen resolution for the desperate need I had for them to kiss, so fic is here to help solve that for us. Also feelings. So many, many feelings. And delicious mutual pining and hilarity of two idiots who clearly want to bang each other, with the knowledge that Zeb eventually will totally get his man (Steve Blum said so!!! just like that!!!) which makes it fun to watch two dumbasses circle each other around. Or finally give in because there's definitely a lot of giving in. Anyway, yes, have some STAR WARS REBELS fic, centered on Kallus and Zeb just because I thought it would be a fun side trip today. No reason! Just seemed like the thing to do, is all! STAR WARS REBELS KALLUZEB FIC RECS: ✦ A Lasat Walks into a Bar by Holderisms, zeb/kallus, the mandalorian spoilers, 1.3k After speaking with Teva, Zeb gets a drink. Even when someone is waiting on him. ✦ Eudaemonia by Bur, zeb/kallus, 7.9k Alexsandr never expected to find peace more terrifying than war. ✦ Hoth is (Not) for Lovers by bar2d2s, zeb/kallus, 1.2k Hoth is cold and Kallus is miserable. Set only just before Empire Strikes Back. ✦ Falling in Love with the Right Now (Poster Boy) by akaparalian, (pre-)zeb/kallus & ghost crew, 1.6k Somewhere out there in the galaxy, there's a rebel propaganda artist who deserves a raise. ✦ It Works on You by Kereea, zeb/kallus, 3.2k Humans and lasats can have very different ideas about what's attractive. Zeb and Kallus still tend to line up by each other's standards. ✦ Warmth by icarus_chained, zeb/kallus, 1.6k Zeb and Kallus, in the aftermath of Zero Hour. Someone needs to put Kallus back together, or near as can be managed. ✦ Mating Rituals by Velvedere, zeb/kallus & sabine & cast, 4.7k Zeb has been acting weird lately. Kallus vents to Sabine about it. ✦ in your warmth I forget how cold it can be by dykeannebonny, zeb/kallus, NSFW, 3.6k "Are you going to kiss me, Garazeb Orrelios?" Alex's lips were parted; he inhaled deeply through his mouth. "I'm thinkin' about it," Zeb said quietly. ✦ What We Want by TheTrashMan (Viraaja), Viraaja, zeb/kallus, NSFW, 12k Kallus and Zeb realize what it is they want from each other: sex, obviously. ✦ Falling in Love with the Right Now (Poster Boy) by akaparalian, zeb/kallus & phoenix crew, 1.6k Somewhere out there in the galaxy, there's a rebel propaganda artist who deserves a raise. ✦ The Care and Keeping of Ex-Imperials Who Need Coffee, a Nap, and a Hug in That Order by akaparalian, kallus & phoenix crew (& some zeb/kallus), 8.8k Five Ghost crew members who helped Alexsandr Kallus, and one who he helped in return. ✦ In the Middle of the Night by bar2d2s, hera & kallus (background kanan/hera & zeb/kallus), 1.8k When one member of your self-made family is pregnant, you’re all pregnant. ✦ Celestial Navigation by ambiguously, zeb/kallus, 1.7k Kallus doesn't understand why Zeb's not sad. ✦ Untitled Rebels Fic by Mirror and Image, zeb/kallus & cast, 11.6k Kallus, on Yavin IV, sees a Lasat that isn't Zeb. Things go as expected. ✦ When we have peace by apocrypha73, zeb/kallus, 2.9k After the Battle of Endor, Kallus and Zeb enjoy the celebration. ✦ The Last Parking Spot on Lovers' Lane by ambiguously, zeb/kallus & hera & cast, 3.7k All Zeb wants is to find a nice quiet spot to make out. This is not as easy as it should be. ✦ Speculation by Nana, zeb/kallus & ap-5, 1k "AP-5," Kallus said, "are you under the impression that Captain Orrelios and I are involved, romantically?" "It is common knowledge at the base, sir. You don't have to deny it just because I am a droid." ✦ roisters by spookykingdomstarlight, zeb/kallus, 1.8k For once, he is willing to put aside his thoughts and act. “Garazeb,” he says, because he is the only one who calls Zeb by his full name and because he’s noticed the way Zeb’s fur ripples in pleasure after he says it and somewhere in the back of his mind he knows that means something. “A word?” ✦ in this world by xpityx, zeb/kallus, NSFW, 2.1k It had been eight months. Eight months since he'd last seen Alex in person. He'd still been Kallus then, had still been convinced that the Ghost crew were taking him to his executioners. ✦ The Sea Has Ten Thousand Names by ambiguously, zeb/kallus, 2.6k Living on a new planet is hard when you don't know the language. ✦ Date Night by ambiguously, zeb/kallus & kanan/hera & jacen, 1.7k Asking your not-boyfriend out on a date is even harder when he's stuck babysitting for his friends. ✦ Heard It in a Love Song (Can't Be Wrong) by ambiguously, zeb/kallus, 2.7k Kallus can't quite figure out what makes Zeb tick, but he keeps trying. ✦ a more than mutually beneficial agreement by wrennette, zeb/kallus, NSFW, 3.1k It takes a while, getting ex-Agent Kallus to open up. ✦ Another Mission, Another Mess by icarus_chained, zeb/kallus & kanan/hera & ghost crew, 6.5k Kallus has been slowly intergrating into the crew when the Ghost is assigned to a normal supply run. The mission goes south, as it usually does, Zeb takes a hit, Kallus doesn't take it well, and the rest of the crew try to pick of the pieces. Another mission, another mess. Just another day on the Ghost. ✦ Rebel Teamwork by sempaiko, zeb/kallus, NSFW, 4.9k How many Rebels does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ✦ Unscheduled Contact by Kala_Sathinee, zeb/kallus & cast, NSFW, 3.4 During a rescue mission, Zeb gets stranded aboard the Chimaera when it jumps to hyperspace. He and Kallus make the most of the time. ✦ just another damn of the damns you're not giving by shades, zeb/kallus & cast, NSFW, 6.8k The thing is, Zeb’s handsy. ✦ taste of pleasure by wrennette, zeb/kallus, NSFW, 1.2k The one where Zeb follows through on his idea of fucking Sasha full of come and then eating him out until he cries ✦ Scent Blind by Rachello344, zeb/kallus & cast, NSFW, 4.4k Alexsandr has been avoiding Zeb since he joined the Rebellion in full, convinced that prolonged contact with the Lasat will prove his undoing. As long as Zeb smells so unfathomably good, he’ll never be able to speak with him casually, especially now that there are no other divides between them. If only Zeb had gotten the memo that Alexsandr was doing this for both their sakes. Unfortunately, it seems Zeb can’t, or won’t, take a hint. ✦ In Your Orbit by LoveCrumb, zeb/kallus, NSFW, 3.2k After wanting to touch Zeb for so long, Alex reaches up and runs his hands down Zeb’s wide chest. The fur there, like much of his body, is short and thick; it feels velvety as Alex strokes downward, and more textured and coarse on the upstroke. ✦ We Belong Way Down Below by Mithrigil, zeb/kallus, NSFW, 1.6k Zeb runs into Kallus on a routine mission. He doesn't know how that resulted in both of them getting off, but he's not complaining. ✦ ibac jaon by wrennette, zeb/kallus, nsfw, 3.9k Fulcrum had given up on being found. ✦ Cogs by ambiguously, zeb/kallus, 1.1k "You brought him home. That makes him yours." ✦ ever so patiently by Anonymous, zeb/kallus, NSFW, 21.2k Lasat have very peculiar mating habits. No one thought to tell Kallus about that. or: Kallus is the last one to find out he’s being courted.

#alexsandr kallus #garazeb orrelios #kalluzeb #the mandalorian spoilers #fic recs #star wars fic recs

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albonious · 5 months

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hiii hope u dont mind me asking, but could u recommend ur favorite galex long fics out there? also!! ur fic u have pinned i read it before we even were mutuals and it's SO GOOD one of my favs!!

ahh thank you so much, i'm glad you liked it!!

i don't know what you consider a longfic but since there are barely any 50k+ galex-centered fics i will list my favourites that are 20k+ lol

all green lights by venerat (22k) f1 driver george texts the wrong number after a hookup and he and non-famous alex start texting, and then they accidentally meet in a club.

it's you i fell into by glitterbb (@yesterdayiwrote) (22k) george and alex go on married at first sight and get married to each other.

nothing but teeth by crescenteluce (@janinaduszejko) (25k) george finds out alex has hooked up with guys and becomes obsessed with it, so they end up hooking up as well and not talking about their feelings (but what else is new).

you and me till the end of time by alltimecharlo (28k) george has a four-year-old daughter and alex is her preschool teacher, and actually, his daughter's preschool teacher is really cute, george thinks.

wait 'till the world is mine by lewisshamilton (@georgerussells) (30k) this is a classic. george finds out he's the crown prince of the uk and alex is with him through all his struggles.

who's that guy? by ohmygaslys (singsweetmelodies) (@singsweetmelodies) and welightitup (@welightitup) (31k) a new girl au! if you (like me) have never seen new girl, yuki, pierre and alex live together and after max and daniel moved out, they needed two new roommates, who end up being (surprise surprise) george and charles, who also happen to be alex' and pierre's exes. george and charles think pierre and alex are dating, pierre and alex think george and charles are dating and yuki is just so. incredibly. done with them all.

what do i know? show me the right way to go. by tiredtiredsharl (34k) musician alex and actor george used to date, but broke up and became strangers. years later, they reconnect because the band alex is in is writing the theme for the james bond movie george will be playing in.

champagne gold by lewisshamilton (@georgerussells) (34k) alex, son of the uk's prime minister, and george, crown prince of the uk, fall in love. it's as simple as that. (loosely inspired by rw&rb).

ode to a conversation stuck in your throat by prettyrotten (@prettydangrotten) (40k) loads and loads of miscommunication, they both can't talk about their thoughts for shit and it's so awkward but it's so damn rewarding when they finally get their shit together and talk.

confide in me by glitterbb (@yesterdayiwrote) (45k) alex, writing for a right-wing tabloid, meets george, son of the labour party leader, at a labour party event and against all odds, they fall in love.

if you know some more good galex fics, please send them to me, i am desperate for some more content of them!

#all of these are so good i'm so obsessed with all of them #myr answers #f1 #f1 rpf #galex #f1 fic rec #fic rec #george russell #alex albon

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hiramaris · 8 months

Text

Kiss It Off Me

CHAPTER 1

Summary:

A story revolving around the newly arrived resident farmer in the eyes of the personified perfection, the sunflower of Pelican Town herself, Haley. Or. When Haley finally met the person that caused ripples in what was once a stagnant town, and she didn’t know how to handle such massive change.

Pairings: Haley x Fem!farmer

Notes:

Haley's heart events are just soooo wifey, especially after marriage. Her character development is well written off but I just can't help but notice that something is missing, like the heart events are just not that connected in some way. Stardew is an absolute gem don't get me wrong. I'd like to try and connect what I think is missing which is the reason this fic is created. P.S. Second try in making fanfiction. I apologize for any future grammatical errors or whatever. English is not my primary language.

Disclaimer: I do not own Stardew Valley or any of the related characters. Stardew Valley is created by and owned by ConcernedApe. This fanfiction is intended for entertainment only. I am not making any profit from this story. All rights of the original Stardew Valley story belong to ConcernedApe.

Warning: None so far? Just Haley being her usual self

Gif from reddit.com

Winter 25

Immobile.

Stagnant.

Bland.

What words could possibly do justice to describe this sleepy town? Pelican Town had its charms sure. It’s peaceful, the air is fresh, and would never choke you on your sleep plus it gives a really nice tan so Haley wouldn’t really complain.

But it was just so... boring. Was that the right term?

The people are meh, nosy, and just as bland but they are good neighbors though don't get her wrong. They look after them— her and Emily when their parents can’t.

Ugh.

Them again. Thinking about them just makes her angry— blood boiling and all that, and well… sad which is infuriating.

How can you just leave your kids just to go follow your own dreams and travel? And then act like you care just by sending some half-hearted letter? Sending a letter now and then was hardly enough to make up for their absence. How low could that be?

Emily doesn’t think so. But what does she know? Her cooking was as bland as the town, and her obsession with crystals and hippie clothes was just plain ridiculous. She knows nothing.

Her sister is anything but pessimistic. She saw the light in everything whereas Haley ever saw them through the lens of her camera.

Capturing a single moment in a photograph was a thousand times more vivid and alive than the bleak and colorless reality she was currently living in.

She should be in college right now, pursuing her dreams, being the center of attention, and having boys falling over themselves to impress her. Or she would have been running her own photography studio by now in a city that never sleeps, schmoozing with some famous photographers and carving a niche for herself in the cut-throat world of photography.

But no, because here she was, stuck in a six-mile drive from the nearest city, life as directionless as the people in here.

Why am I even staying here? She wonders.

Oh, yeah— grandma.

This house is hers. Her house is the only thing that made her feel that Grandma is still here, with them. Even though Haley is talking big about leaving this town, she knew to herself that she doesn’t have the strength to just leave it just like that. Which is why they both tried to keep it tidy and well... avoiding it from falling apart.

Aside from that, there was nothing to do here. The only things keeping her sane were her camera, her phone, and the clothes she ordered online.

Oh, and of course, her best friend, Alex.

He's the only one— aside from Emily and of course, the Mullner residence, Granny and George are good people even though George is grumpy all the time, that she's able to have a decent conversation. She and Alex are, after all, not the sharpest tool in the shed, and shares almost the same brain cell.

He’s that typical jock boy, ripped as hell but in terms of brain, well… meh. Not like Haley's any better so who is she to judge?

They went to the same school, belonged to the same clique, and were both popular, of course. He’s here to practice his grid ball or whatever but Haley knew better.

Alex, despite being the dungus that he is, has a lot on his plate already. He needs the peace this town could offer.

And maybe, maybe I need it, too.

Maybe being away from the city has a good cause, despite her constant complaints, this town has been her home for the past six years after all.

But she just really couldn’t help but dwell on this stupid thought of hers of being stagnant and directionless at this time of the year.

Winter.

Ugh. It’s stupidly cold outside and there’s no way she’s walking in six-inch snow just to get a quality photo, which isn’t much considering the lighting outside does not satisfy her at all. The only, and probably one good thing about winter is peppermint coffee. It's hot, minty, and makes her feel warm while making her mouth worthy of being sucked on— err... that's a want that cannot be sated as of the moment.

The bachelors in this town suck for real. They are not even worthy of a single glance. Apart from Alex, of course, but he's a friend so... no.

And what's made it double suck is that she ran out of peppermint coffee. Pierre is out of stock and there's no way she'll let herself be caught alive inside that creep manager's store that runs Joja or whatever.

Now she's stuck sitting at the table, devouring a massive pink cake that could feed an entire family, enduring a coffee so bland it makes her want to try and drink tea.

She hates tea.

Oh yeah, she's also holding a note and a sunflower in her other hand.

She doesn't want to read the letter but considering the gifts she just received, it’s probably just the same lame-ass apology about being unable to be here on her birthday this coming Spring 14th. Not that it mattered anymore; it had been two years of absence, and she had grown used to it by now.

With a flick of her wrist, she tossed the note onto the table, debating whether to toss it into the fireplace or tear it to shreds or whatever.

If it's just another excuse, she doesn’t want to hear it.

"Haaaay!" And there's a familiar voice.

"If you don't have peppermint coffee with you I swear to Yoba—"

"What's the case, long face?" He quipped. "And no, I don't have anything with me."

She looked up from her cake, finding Alex strolling in their kitchen with one of his shit-eating grins, hair covered with a concerning amount of snow. She grimaced, "sometimes I wonder why I'm friends with you."

He feigned a hurt expression, "I thought you love me though."

"According to gossip, maybe but really, I don't." She deadpanned.

He cackled at the mention of that. At the center of the gossip mill passing down from Marnie, Jodi, and Caroline, maybe Robin, too, and probably all the yoga club, is he and Haley dating. Which was absurd, to be honest.

"No, really, Hay." He finally turns serious. "What's up? What's got your face looking like that?"

"It's just the stupid climate." Haley tried to lie. She didn't want to stir up drama at the moment. Alex frowned, catching up with her lie almost immediately. He caught sight of the letter Haley threw earlier. "Alex don't—"

Too late. He already got it. He sat down next to her as he read the contents of the note, his brows furrowing in what she assumes is annoyance. "Parents, huh? Same old, same old?" He raised an eyebrow.

Haley huffed and snatched the letter away. "Yes, the usual."

"Well," Alex propped his elbow on the backrest, a sly grin returning to his face. "I just got the perfect news that might take your mind off things."

Haley arched a perfect eyebrow, curious. Gossip wasn't his usual forte.

"Spill."

"A new farmer is coming to town."

Haley's fork paused in mid-air. "Uh... I'm not sure how to react to that, and what's so great about it?"

His smile widened. "I heard she's from Zuzu City."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Why? Surprised another Zuzu native is coming here?"

"No, you dungus." She slapped his hand attempting to take a slice of her cake. "I heard you correctly, right? You said the farmer's a she? A girl is taking over that farm?"

"Yes," Alex confirmed, finally snagging a bite of cake. Haley makes a scrunched face in mock disgust. "The farmer's a she. What's the problem though?" He asked in mouthfuls.

Haley stood up to grab another spoon. No way she's getting his imaginary cooties. Alex doesn't seem to mind; it only further encourages him to eat some more. "Because it’s weird." She said as she sat down. "Farming isn't exactly a girl's job, especially for a city girl like her. I bet you she wouldn't last a month."

"Not all girls are like you, Hay— ow! What's that for?!" He rubbed his ribs where Haley just nudged with her boniest elbow of all time.

"As I was saying before being rudely interrupted," she rolled her eyes, "farming is all dirt and nasty, smelly clothes. That farm was barely run by old man Raileigh before he died. What could possibly a city girl like his granddaughter could do with that rundown farm? I bet you it’s already smoldering by now."

"Good point," Alex said as he continued eating. Haley swear to Yoba all this idiot does is eat and relax in here.

He has a diet, right? So does she, and they're like eating a fat block of sugar right now.

Whatever. Pink cake has always been an exemption from all her seasonal dietary plans.

"But I guess we'll have to wait and see; don't you think so?" Alex turns to her after a few moments of silence. "I heard she's around our age. If it's true that farming is as difficult as they say, the least we can do is make her feel welcomed."

Haley barely nods in acknowledgment.

This town is like a pond, where everything that enters stays and everyone already there remains. The city is a raging storm with ocean waves ready to swallow you if you go against the flow. A lot of people there has a sense of direction, one Haley aspires to have, and what Pelican lacks. You can't, at all costs, be still and unmoved and some people just couldn't do that.

And those people who couldn't stand the pressure, come here, like a moth drawn to a flame, seeking the mundanity Pelican Town could offer them. Perhaps they have grown weary of the constant hustle and bustle. Maybe city life has been too much. Maybe modern life has been too much for this farmer.

Who knows?

But one thing Haley doesn't like, and what keeps her unmoved and still, is change. Adapting, and adjusting isn't meant for her. It took years before she could finally settle a lifestyle in this town, and another two years of adjustment when her parents decided it would be a good idea to abandon them and go travel. She knew where to go, where townspeople go just so she could avoid interacting with them, she accustomed herself to their culture, and the perfect spots for taking pictures. She has it all memorized and planned out perfectly.

And this farmer will be an anomaly to her perfectly (not as perfect as she thought) crafted routine. New face, a new attitude, and just an overall new person she might be obligated to talk to for the sake of introduction.

Pelican is a stagnant pond, yet this farmer, this alien to her world, she's not yet even here but she is already starting to cause ripples.

And Haley doesn't know what to think of it.

~~~~~

Notes:

The title was inspired by Cigarettes After Sex' Kiss it off me. Their songs are such *chef's kiss* and whilst I was listening to this song, it kind of, sorta, reminded me of how my farmer sees her wife. Thus kabooOm this fic is born

Edit: Because I'm procrastinating and I made sure to finish off my other story first, I decided now to transfer this story from Ao3 to Tumblr

#stardew valley #stardew farmer #haley x farmer #haley x reader #stardew fanfic #stardew alex #stardew haley #sdv

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thisbuildinghasfeelings · 5 months

Text

It's been a tough year in a lot of ways, but one thing I've been able to consistently count on to bring me joy is the incredible writing in this fandom! I feel like 2023 has been almost a golden age of Tarlos fic. With both the sheer quantity AND quality of fic, it has been a wonderful time to be a Tarlos fic reader! In celebration of this golden age, I wanted to share a list of some of the fic that brought me the most joy in the past year.

Of course, this is not a comprehensive list...as much as I may want to, I can't possibly read everything this fandom has to offer. There's still a lot to get to on my to-read list. And even from the fic I did read, I'm sure I'm forgetting some amazing ones. There's just SO MUCH. But here I have listed (alphabetic by author) some of the fic that most resonated with me the past year, fic that I still think about and reread, and fic that has taken up full time residence in my brain!

There are A LOT...so I'll be putting the list under the cut.

all my blood for the sweetness of his laugh by @alrightbuckaroo

A truly beautiful little fic about Carlos' feelings about TK's laugh. A bit of angst and a lot of love.

anger has told me her real name is grief by alrightbuckaroo

An excellent 4x17/4x18 fic that deals a lot with Carlos' grief and the journey he goes through in those two episodes.

my beatin' heart belongs to you by bartsy

A fic about Carlos' anxiety after the death of his father, manifested in his fears for the safety of his husband. This fic is so beautiful and very in character. I would love it so much if the show would go even a tiny bit in the direction of exploring Carlos' anxiety!

It Beats for You by @basilsunrise

A 4x04 coda, porn with feelings and bottom Carlos...truly, what more could I ask for?? Very hot and SO MANY feelings!

she has almost killed me with love for that boy by @beautifulhigh

Another 4x04 coda (there can never be enough) that's also a study of the different types of love, all of which Carlos has in his life.

How quickly we change overnight by @birdclowns

A pre-canon fic about TK and his relationship with Alex. I particularly love this kind of thing where we have so little concrete information in canon. It's a perfect opportunity for fic, and I really love this one. Alex could easily be handled as some horrible villain, but the way he's handled here is far more realistic and I think it makes my heart break for TK even more.

Even if the World Ends Tomorrow by @bonheur-cafe

A post-apocalypse AU that's a little terrifying but ultimately very hopeful. This is one that I kept thinking about long after I read it.

can i be close to you? by @catanisspicy

A 5+1 fic about TK asking Carlos if he'd still love him if he was a worm. A true delight! This is another fic I still think about all the time.

slowly, then all at once by catanisspicy

A fic about TK and Carlos loving each other, which is one of my favorite things in the world.

The Center of the Maze by @carlos-in-glasses

7 times TK and Carlos thought they would never get married and one time they actually did. This fic covers so many of the most significant moments of their relationship and is so very beautifully written. I think my favorite part is (predictably) the section related to the soulmates scene.

When Soulmates Swim by carlos-in-glasses

A wonderful AU where TK and Carlos get to know each other while swimming together. It's everything: hot, sweet, beautiful, poignant, and sometimes incredibly hilarious.

Release the Hand to Relax the Animal by carlos-in-glasses

A fic that's all about touch and the great sex, past and present, that TK and Carlos have had. A true masterpiece.

We Have Suffered Enough by @chicgeekgirl89

A 4x16 coda. Oh, the soulmates scene! I'm automatically going to love anything even remotely soulmates scene-adjacent, and this one is particularly beautiful.

Shiner by chicgeekgirl89

A 4x15 coda dealing with Carlos finding out about TK's black eye, which is something I desperately wanted to see on screen. I love the way it goes here. It's incredibly sweet.

Cold Feet by @cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut

A lovely little fic that has Carlos feeling some big feelings about his soon-to-be husband.

When I'm Like This by cold-blooded-jelly-doughnut

An early season 1 Tarlos fic with a lot of angst and feelings, which is always one of my favorite things. This one is ridiculously hot, yet also filled with so much emotion and feelings and gorgeous writing. Just thinking about it makes me want to reread!

to build a home by @freneticfloetry

A Carlos character study, from pre-series through season 4. If there was ever a character I wanted to study, it's Carlos Reyes. And this fic is beautifully done, expertly exploring the complexities of his character and the gaps canon has left to be filled.

The Sting by @goodways

Shortly after they're married, Carlos gets involved in an FBI sting operation that requires him to go on a date and flirt with another man, something that TK is not thrilled about. This fic is at times funny, emotional, hot and sweet.

First night by goodways

The first time TK and Carlos have sex and all the feelings and attempted avoidance of feelings that comes with it. So many feelings!!!

Take my hand, take my whole life, too by @heartstringsduet

HANDS. What more could I ask for? This fic is an absolutely gorgeous exploration of TK and Carlos' intimacy across their whole lives together. I'm ready to tear up just thinking about it!

But most of it was beautiful by heartstringsduet

An at-home Tarlos honeymoon fic. I call a lot of fic on this list beautiful, but sometimes there's no better word. This fic is beautiful.

broken glass by @irispurpurea

A beautiful, heartbreaking exploration of Carlos' grief. It's all fragmented and non-linear, which only adds to how moving and powerful it is.

a little bit more by krissyloowhoo

An installment of a series in which TK and Carlos adopt a baby girl. This one features Carlos in love with what a good dad TK is.

Stand your brand of love by @ladytessa74

A Tarlos honeymoon fic written prior to the end of the season. This was a go-to reread for me in the weeks leading up to the finale. Even now, when it's no longer technically canon compliant, the emotions hit just as hard.

How I linger to admire by ladytessa74

This fic is pretty much my dream season 5. It has everything: Carlos solving his father's murder, TK and Carlos getting held at gunpoint, and Lou II saving the day. Several items on my wish list for season 5 were directly inspired by reading this fic.

Do it all over again by ladytessa74

TK tries for a do over of the proposal because he thinks Carlos deserves better, which leads to a series of funny, adorable and touching moments. The writing is beautiful, and it even inspired a cross stitch! I have many favorite things about Tessa's writing, but one of my very favorite things is the way she writes the intimacy and affection and touch between TK and Carlos. This fic is filled with some of my favorite examples of that.

All Your Colors Make Me Feel Alive by @lemonlyman-dotcom

This wonderful fic uses the music of Beck to explore moments in TK and Carlos' relationship. Angst and fluff: the best combination.

I'm Not A Fortress, But I Will Try To Protect You by lemonlyman-dotcom

TK and Marjan have a conversation in the wake of the events of 2x04. One of my favorite parts of Lemon's writing is the incredible amount of backstory detail, most particularly the friendship between TK and Marjan. There are hints of this in canon, but here it's beautifully developed and I love it so much.

Call Me If You Get Lost by lemonlyman-dotcom

TK and Carlos go for a romantic weekend while also looking out for a friend. This fic is a delight and so much fun!

Love From the Other Side by @lightningboltreader

Exes to lovers and only one bed...what could possibly be better?? I particularly enjoy the conversation between TK and Carlos that leads to their reconciliation.

We were in screaming color by @liminalmemories21

I was looking forward to this season 4 fic since before the season even started airing! I can imagine it must have been particularly difficult to write, from the ridiculous season 4 timeline to all the plotholes and inconsistencies that the Iris storyline and Carlos' sudden two sisters created, but it was done beautifully. It made me think about so many season 4 details and moments in different ways and ultimately led to an enhanced appreciation of the season.

I need you so much closer by @marjansmarwani

A 4x04 coda. This one focuses on all the many people who love Carlos. I always love to read about Carlos being loved!

where the empty space is a saving grace by @maxbegone

Carlos talks with Gwyn in the time before he's revived by TK and the narcan in 4x04. Beautiful and poignant.

etched in gold by maxbegone

A lovely little wedding moment where TK and Carlos get some alone time during the reception.

By Your Side by @never-blooms

The Reyes kitchen through the years. If there's anything that deserves more exploration, it's the Reyes family and all their complexities. This fic does an incredible job of this and is so beautifully written.

The Calling by @orchidscript

This is a fascinating and beautiful fic about TK using his experience with addiction to help people in the course of his job as a paramedic. It's something I would love so much for them to explore on the show!

Under A Star Spell by orchidscript

In this AU, Carlos practices folk magic. The fic itself is absolutely magical. One of the things I love about it is how different it is from pretty much every other Tarlos fic I've ever read.

Lost and Found by @paperstorm

A 4x04 coda (if there's one thing about me, it's that I love a 4x04 coda). I loved this episode so much but there was so much more I wanted, particularly to see what happened in the aftermath at the hospital, which is why this fic is so appreciated.

Ritual by paperstorm

An installment of Andie's spectacular Missing Moments series. I could easily have put every installment on this list, but I chose the one for 2x11, which is my favorite of the season 2 fics. I'm always a sucker for Carlos working through his feelings about his relationship with his parents!

The Firehouse by paperstorm

An incredible AU with TK and Carlos as childhood friends who meet again years later when Carlos is undercover and TK is living a life of crime. The angst in this one is spectacular, and the payoff is beautiful and earned and extraordinarily satisfying.

peace by @redshirt2

Carlos post-breakup. This little fic is heartbreaking and perfectly captures Carlos' desolate state of mind as he's left alone.

dream this night away by @reyesstrand

A pre-season 4 honeymoon fic where TK and Carlos end up in a motel after their flight is cancelled. A little bit of angst and a lot of love and tenderness.

to which there is no reply by reyesstrand

An absolutely gorgeous honeymoon fic, this time canon-compliant, that features Carlos struggling with his grief and being loved by his husband.

balancing act by reyesstrand

TK and Carlos sharing food and falling in love. What could possibly be better? This fic is so beautiful and it spans the entirety of their relationship. An incredible achievement and a true gift to readers!

the strong will never fall by @rmd-writes

Another 4x04 coda (I truly can never get enough). This one is incredibly tender and emotional.

shine some light on my day by @rosedavid

A sweet, fluffy, gentle fic about TK and Carlos waking up and getting ready for the day together. Domestic fluff at its finest!

and salt the earth behind you by @safeashousespdf

TK brings Carlos to New York 6 months after Gwyn's death and TK grapples with the ways things have changed and the ways he has changed. This fic is incredibly powerful. I read it months ago but I still think about it.

you and me, forevermore by @strandnreyes

A gorgeous wedding coda that made me cry multiple times.

Come what may, I'll still stay by strandnreyes

Carlos struggles with his work-life balance when he becomes a detective. It gets worse and worse until he makes a pretty big mistake that shows him just how bad things have gotten. Lots of angst, but also lots of happiness by the end and so much love permeating through every bit of it. This was one of the THE fics of the year for me and it still lives rent free in my brain!

no rules in breakable heaven by strandnreyes

An AU where Carlos takes a job as a private chef in the Hamptons for TK's family. Jen wrote so many incredible AUs this year, but this one was my favorite. Just the right amount of angst with a proportionately happy ending! And the descriptions of the food Carlos was preparing always made me very hungry.

As long as it's with you by @tailoredshirt

TK and Carlos spend their first Valentine's Day as husbands in the ER, but it's nothing too serious. This fic is mostly soft and sweet. I still think about it all the time, especially the little gestures and affectionate touches between them. It's a lovely little fic that's guaranteed to make you smile.

tell me how by @theghostofashton

Carlos and his grief leading up to the wedding. Beautiful and heartbreaking. I loved this so much.

Back to You and Me by @three-drink-amy

A lovely 4x16 coda. In celebration of finding out that TK doesn't have to worry about Huntington's, TK and Carlos go back to the honky tonk where it all began!

The Weight of Grief by @wandering-night19

This is an absolutely riveting fic that has TK near-death in a coma (again). It's poignant and heartbreaking. One scene in particular in the final chapter makes me want to cry just thinking about it! Some chapters deal with Andrea and Gabriel backstory, which eventually links up to the ongoing story in the present. The whole thing is so well written and beautifully constructed.

living at the centre of a wound still fresh by @welcometololaland

A heartbreaking, beautiful masterpiece of a fic. Carlos struggles with his grief on their honeymoon, but TK is there to help him through. Just thinking about this one makes me want to cry...and also reread!

a long time ago (we used to be friends) by welcometololaland

A masterpiece of an AU, exes to lovers with private investigator Carlos and wrongly accused of murder TK. They work together to clear TK's name and come back together in a beautiful way.

#911 lone star #911 lone star fic #FIC REC

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its-all-ineffable · 8 months

Text

Not me writing another Red, White & Royal Blue fic..... centering around Alex liking to lift Henry onto things...

I mean...the polo match and the red room anyone?!

EDIT: It exists and is out on AO3. Read it HERE!

#alex x henry #firstprince #rwrb #red white and royal blue #red white and royal blue movie #rwrb movie

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81-op-pastries · 5 months

Note

Ok another request this time Daniel with (it’s okay to cry)

Also I loved the Alex Albon fic ❤️

Hello! Sorry this has taken a little while lovely but I'm so glad you liked the last one! ❤️ I've decided to incorporate this one with the F1 Christmas theme I'm going for so if you want it again but normal just let me know ☺️

You'll never be alone | Daniel Ricciardo

Danny ric x reader

Warnings: None ❤️

Summary: For the first time you're not going to make it home for the holidays but thankfully you have Daniel by your side

Daniel entered the living room of your apartment with a huge grin upon his face. He gazed at the winter wonderland you had both been working on all day for your first Christmas together, as he saw your figure sat under the soft glow of the tree lights he noticed a quiet sadness in your eyes.

"Baby? What's wrong?" Danny asked you concerned as he noticed you looking down at your phone. He approached you with a gentle hand on your shoulder and a soft reassuring smile.

You looked up at him with tears in your eyes as you shared the weight in your heart. "I'm so sorry babe I just miss my family most during the holidays, it's the first year I won't be able to make it home and it brings back all the memories"

Daniel understood the depth of your emotions more than anyone, thinking back to the year he wasn't allowed to fly back home to his family. You were his saviour through that dark period and he was there to return the favour.

Daniel pulled you into his comforting embrace. "It's okay to cry. But I'm here for you, Christmas is about being with the ones you love and we can create our own memories"

You hugged him tightly as he soothed you, before carrying you into your shared bedroom. "Now you need a nice long bath while I go get you a surprise, don't come out until I get you okay?" He asked before putting you down and placing a kiss on your nose.

"okay baby I love you" you said giving him a quick peck before heading off to your ensuite to run yourself a bath, you slowly climbed in feeling the warmth of the water relax your muscles.

Some time later you had gotten out and was now sat down drying your hair as you saw Daniel enter the room with a huge grin on his face. "Okay it's ready!" He said with an excited chuckle.

You couldn't help but giggle. "Danny what have you been doing for the past hour?" You asked him curiously, wondering what the heck he's been up to.

"Oh you're about to find out" he said as he helped you stand up. "but you've got to close your eyes i want it to be a surprise" he instructed as he held his hands over your eyes and guided you to the living room"

"okay babe" you said with a chuckle as he walked you to the center of the room before lifting his hands away. "Okay open em!" He said really excited as he watched you slowly open your eyes and gaze around the room. Which was now adorned with lots of decorations, the table full of familiar snacks and your favourite Christmas song on the radio.

"Oh Danny, this is amazing" you said with tears in your eyes as you turned to face him. He still had a huge grin on his face "I changed the lights on the tree to those warm white ones you always talked about, but I left the star off cause that was always your job at home, although I'll have to lift you up so you can put it on" he teased with a laugh as he pulled you in for a tight hug.

"I got all your favourite snacks too so we can have them while we watch a Christmas film and bake cookies. I was going to surprise you with all this on Christmas eve but I figured you needed it now. I hope you like it" he said as he planted a soft kiss to your forehead before smiling hopefully at you.

"I love it baby thank you so much, this is the best Christmas present I've ever had" you said with a big smile as you peppered kisses all over his face, hugging him tightly.

He hugged you tighter bringing your head to rest on his chest as he whispered in your ear "you're not alone love you'll never be. old traditions or new ones, we can do them both together and I'm grateful to make new memories with you"

And that's just what you both did, having the best Christmas you've ever had.

#daniel ricciardo #daniel ricciardo fic #dr3 x reader #daniel ricciardo x reader #f1 fiction #f1 #formula 1

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happiness-of-the-pursuit · 2 months

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Six Sentence Line Sunday

Hi, I'm late again. I did a lot more beta reading than writing this weekend, and also did myself dirty by drinking way too much coffee today which resulted in a stomach ache in a big way. Once the nausea receded and the fics were betaed, I finally wrote some words. Like five minutes ago, so, you know, not edited.

Here's six lines from Working Title: Daddy Issues:

“It’s lovely to meet you as well,” Henry says. “Now I know who to contact for embarrassing stories and the like.” Raf grins as Alex scoffs. “Please, June’s already got that covered.” “You can never have too many,” Raf argues. “Plus, there’s that time you called me asking about STD test centers—" “Fuck off, that was fucking terrifying,” Alex complains, though his smile still stretches across his face. Raf ignores him. “I was about to start the Ave María. I just knew Oscar was going to put some kind of curse on me for being a bad Gay Guide for not talking to you about testing earlier. Gracias a Dios, we both learned about allergic reactions to flavored condoms—” “O-kay, that’s enough,” Alex says, laughing. He looks to Henry, his face slightly bashful, as if to check that he’s not completely horrified.

Tags and thanks below the cut :)

Thanks for the tags @littlemisskittentoes @suseagull04 @benwvatt @nocoastposts @itsmaybitheway @hgejfmw-hgejhsf @magicandarchery @getmehighonmagic @leaves-of-laurelin @kiwiana-writes!!

In case anyone wants to slide in late (or use this for another day this week, honestly pick one, especially if you posted and I missed it) I'm tagging @affectionatelyrs @cactusdragon517 @cultofsappho @eusuntgratie @gayrootvegetable @gay-flyboys @jackzimmermemes @juloviz @leojfitz @msmarvelouswinchester @read-and-write- @rockyroadkylers @rmd-writes @ships-to-sail @sherryvalli @user-anakin @welcometololaland @whimsymanaged @xthelastknownsurvivorx @zwiazdziarka :)

#red white and royal blue #rwrb fanfic #rwrb #fanfiction #rwrb fandom #firstprince #henry fox mountchristen windsor #alex claremont diaz #rafael luna #six sentence sunday #rwrb wip #happinessofthepursuit writes #wip: daddy issues

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neoyongz · 10 months

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good night, baby 🌙 | alex turner x reader (smut)

Alex found the perfect chance to make your fantasy come true.

warnings: somnophilia, alex!dom, breeding kink, the whole fic is kinda centered around him, wet dream, Al likes being called sir (blink and you won’t notice it lol), mention of shower sex

word count: 2.1k

disclaimer: english is not my first language so, in advantage, i apologize for grammar mistakes 🤭

requested by: anon

It was past midnight. You found yourself sleeping after a very long day of working, and your husband prepared a romantic dinner at home with red candles and roses. You didn’t ask for it, but he knew how tired you were after a whole week of working 2 shifts a day and he wanted to cheer you up by preparing your favorite dish.

Quickly after eating, you took a relaxing shower and went straight to bed, and even if he wasn't going to sleep at that time, Alex layed down with you. He hugged you and let you sleep hiding your face in his chest, just as you liked. You fell asleep almost immediately as he kissed your forehead and caressed your hair softly, his hands were warm and his caresses made you feel comfortable.

It was something common for you to sleep hugging him, that position always made you feel better after an exhausting or bad day, and he also loved sleeping like that.

Anyway, a few hours passed and Turner still wasn’t able to fall asleep, hugging you and sighing at his boredom. He looked at the clock: 3 in the morning. Suddenly, a thought came across his mind:

“Al, can I ask you something?” You smiled and sat beside him.

“Sure, pumpkin. Tell me” He took a hairbrush and started brushing your wet hair.

“I’ve had this dream the other day about you… fucking me while I was sleeping” You whispered, feeling your cheeks blushing. “And I want you to do it if it doesn’t bother you”

He continued brushing your hair and kissed your shoulder. “Of course, cutie”

“I give you consent to do it whenever you want to, unless i’m feeling bad or something like that” You turned around and looked at him. “But yeah, I thought it would be something cute to do”

He had that conversation with you about 2 days ago after you had a quick session of shower sex and he thought maybe he could turn your fantasy into reality tonight.

To do it, he started by lowering his hands south into your shorts, slowly touching your buttcheeks. After a few seconds, his left hand went to your front, almost touching your pussy, but he went up again and caressed your tummy all the way up to your tits. He knew you always slept without a bra because it was uncomfortable, so this time the table flipped to his favor: He sneaked his hand into your shirt and started massaging your breasts, playing with your nipples to get them hard.

Once he did, he lifted up your shirt and stared at your perfect pointy tits getting lightened by the moonlight and a few candles he lit before you fell asleep. He started feeling an erection forming under his pants, he approached your tits and gave them a few kisses being careful to not wake you up. He licked and sucked your nipples to see how far he could go before you noticed what he was doing, but luckily you fell into a deep sleep that night.

He got back to your shorts to take them off, leaving you almost naked. His hand went into your panties to masturbate you for a few seconds to get you wet enough, and once he accomplished that, he spreaded your fluids all over your entrance to use them as lube. Holding your panties with his other hand, he licked two of his fingers and then got them down again, teased your entrance with a few touches in circles and stroked your clit carefully as he left some kisses on your neck. He wanted to wait a bit to get you fully wet before he went into action to not hurt you.

Alex continued masturbating you while kissing your neck and chest trying to get you used to all the stimulation while sleeping. His free hand went to your waist, holding it firm to get you closer, rubbing his boner to your privates.

“This is how you get me” Alex whispered. “This is what happens when I think of you, my love” He licked your bottom lip and slowly introduced two fingers into you.

He almost prayed that it didn’t wake you up, but luckily, your only reaction was whimpering and trying to move, but he tightened his grip to bury his fingers even deeper making you moan. It was all going well for him, until he heard you gasping “Damn, Alex”. Were you awake? Nah, it couldn’t be like that.

Just to be sure, he got a third finger inside and you didn’t make any sound other than a very airy moan. You smiled through your dreams and kept sleeping while he fingered you, thinking it was all just a dream.

Alex started moving his fingers slowly to stretch your walls, rubbing his erection to your tummy feeling how it was already leaking some pre-cum. With his free hand, he got rid of his pants and underwear, now feeling a lot more comfortable to do whatever he wanted. Still moving his fingers inside you, he got closer and started moving his pelvis up and down to jerk off against you while giving a few kisses on your neck.

Even if he tried to take it easy to let you sleep, he totally forgot about this because of the pleasure numbing his mind. His cheeks were red, his forehead was covered in sweat and his eyes were closed to let his imagination fly, visualizing your hand wrapped around his cock. His fingers curled inside you trying to touch your g-spot and rubbed your clit with his palm until he realized how much stimulation he was putting on you and slowly got his fingers out, he removed your panties and you tried to move as he felt a cold breeze on your legs.

Alex approached the nightstand and opened one of the cabinets, took a condom and opened it. Once he got it on, he aligned his length to your entrance and pressed it against you to get in. Almost instantly, he felt a rush of pleasure and relief all over his body as his cock got buried into your warm and tight inside. He took some time to get fully into you just to feel that sense of relief for a few more seconds, and once he finished getting in, he stayed there so your body could get used to it and that’s when you whimpered again.

He carefully got on top of you and when he felt like he couldn’t wait more, he started thrusting slowly while groaning. He felt at heaven, even if he missed your kisses, but knowing he could do whatever he wanted to you because he was the only one in control made him feel kind of powerful. Obviously he wouldn’t do anything he knew you wouldn’t like.

He kept thrusting as he sucked your tits again, smiling at how hard your nipples were. You moaned, still dreaming about him fucking you, half awake and half asleep. Even when dreaming you kind of knew you were actually getting fucked and that it wasn’t just a wet dream, but it was like your mind didn’t want to escape from your dreams.

“Uhm, Alex” You moaned trying to open your eyes, but Alex quickly covered them with his hand.

“Shh, go back to sleep pup” He whispered and kissed your cheek. Lucky him, because your body obeyed and let you have some more minutes of sleep.

His hand left your face and got to the bed so he could support his weight better, now thrusting a bit faster. He sighed and closed his eyes as your pussy contracted because of the stimulation, making him groan and get his hand to your clit to masturbate it. His head was full of pleasure, his back was slightly arched and his lips were getting puffier because of him biting them trying to make as less noises as possible.

He buried his head in the bed next to your neck, which he kissed and bit carefully leaving a few marks. Those bits were the ones that woke you up fully.

“Al- Fuck” You whispered and opened your eyes, feeling helpless at waking up at so much pleasure. “Did you-“ He shut your lips with a kiss, a needy and desperate kiss. He played with your tongue, curling it and making it explore your whole buccal cavity. He bit your bottom lip and separated a few centimeters, but still touched your lips with his.

“Shh, stay quiet and let me fuck you good” He whispered while thrusting harder, groaning in ecstasy. “Relax, babe”

You closed your eyes again now moaning out loud as he thrusted into your g-spot, making you tear up and try to reach his neck to hug it but failing because of your mind being blurred by all that pleasure right after waking up, it was almost too much, but you for sure enjoyed it.

“Are- are you using a condom?” You asked in the middle of your moaning mess.

“Yeah, why?” Alex looked at you and smiled, he loved looking at you while fucking.

“Take it off” You buried your nails on his back as he pushed your spot again. “And- cum inside”

Well, that took Alex by surprise. Of course he always wanted to do it but he was too shy to ask and as this was already making one of your fantasies come true now, maybe doing something else would be too much for you, but he still liked the idea.

“Are you sure, pumpkin?” As he felt close, he slowed down his thrusts and kissed your neck. You whispered a very soft “Yes” to his ear, and after your confirmation, he started thrusting hard again.

Your moans echoed in the room as well as his groans and the sound of both bodies crashing into each other, the whole room felt warm and Alex was at the edge of his orgasm. He grabbed your neck to choke you carefully, your eyes teared up again and you grabbed his arm.

“Alex, fu-“ Alex quickly took your hand out of your neck and put it on your mouth and groaned before giving his last few thrusts.

“Let me fill you up, baby” He sighed and took his cock off of you, leaving you feeling empty. He quickly took away the condom and went inside again, stealing a scream from your lips before doing some more thrusts until he finally reached his orgasm and cummed inside you as he thrusted hard into your spot.

You moaned and arched your back, burying your nails once again into his skin and leaving some red marks.

“Shit, Alex” You whispered and sighed, you were exhausted.

He didn’t speak a word, he just came out of you and looked at his cum dripping out of your cunt.

“You looked so cute sleeping” Alex smiled and kissed your thighs. “Lemme clean you up”. He got his underwear on again and got up to take some tissues, came back to the bed and cleaned your legs carefully.

“Did I? Well… I was dreaming of you” You laughed and opened your legs for him, putting your hands on your inner thighs.

“Yeah, I noticed” He smiled and tossed the tissues. “Don’t do tha’, you’ll get me horneh again.” He joked and you didn’t obey. Instead, you passed your hands around your thighs and went down to your pussy, taking a bit of his cum to taste it. “What are you doing?”

“Nothing” You smiled promiscuously. “Just tasting you”

“You naughty little fuck” He smiled and kissed you, sucking your bottom lip and biting it slowly.

“I didn’t get to be conscious for the whole first part” You pouted and took his hand to your tits. “Also, I wanna make you feel good too. Please, Al” You hugged his neck and moaned into his ear. “Please, sir”

You took your hand to his tummy, going down all the way to his underwear, playing with the elastic and teasing him, being fully conscious that it was a good strategy to drive him crazy with little teases to get what you wanted.

“One more?” He asked and grabbed your breast, playing with your nipple. You whimpered his name.

“Mhm, please, Alex” Just hearing you begging already got him horny again, and even before noticing, he was kissing you passionately.

Both tongues started colliding again, your lips getting red and puffy, and with no rest in between, you both were getting ready for a very long night incoming.

[ . . . ]

hi everyone !! new fic dropped hehe 🤭 btw i got the breeding kink idea from @mywritingonlyfans so credits to her for that part :3 hope u enjoyed !! feel free to ask me anything in my questions box :p love y’all !!

#alex turner #arctic monkeys #alex turner fanfic #alex turner imagine #alex turner x reader #alex turner x y/n #alex turner x you #alex turner smut

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sstar-ggirl · 4 months

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The Lights shine brighter when you’re there.

Pairing: Alex Turner x AFAB!reader (but u can read as wtv u want)

Word count:1081 (this ain’t a blurb ts a fic atp😭💀)

Summary: filming for TBHC, 2018 era, super cute fluff shit

Mars rambles abt things: AIGHT SO I NEED THIS MAN TERRIBLY BAD. ESPECIALLY TBHC ALEX😭. Anyways I wrote a cute little fluff fic for the first time in forever bc I had time(FINALLY) anyways I’ll try to write as much as I can.

The set was abuzz with anticipation as Alex Turner prepared to film the music video for his latest album. Surrounded by a team of producers and filming crew, he couldn't help but feel a surge of excitement for this particular project. The album was a supposed to be “a playful tune, super smooth but makes you feel expensive”he said when you asked about it. It carried a personal touch that resonated deeply with him – and he had the perfect person to share the screen with, his girlfriend, you. His most prized possession, something he wants to show off forever.

As the cameras started rolling, the set was transformed into a mesmerizing, eye catching jazz bar. The director, recognizing the unique connection between Alex and you, aimed to capture not just the essence of the song but also the genuine emotion shared between you two. The first scene unfolded in a dimly lit but well decorated jazz bar, the air heavy with the lingering notes of the melody.

Alex, dressed in his signature 70s style, met you in the center of the set, dressed in a tight black dress with a long slit in the side, black heels with gold accessories. There was an unspoken understanding between you two, a silent agreement to let the music guide the movements. As the haunting notes filled the room, you two moved with a fluidity that spoke of a deep, unspoken connection. It was more than just a regular dance; it was a dance of the heart.

The director, observing from behind the monitors, couldn't help but marvel at the chemistry on display. The raw emotion conveyed through his and your expressions painted a vivid picture of love and longing. The first scene wrapped, leaving everyone on set with a sense of anticipation for what was to come.

During a break, Alex and you found a quiet corner to steal a moment away from the commotion. You two shared a deep hug and kiss, acknowledging the magic that was created by you two. As you two broke from the kiss, Alex couldn't help but express his gratitude for having you by his side.

"(Y/N), you brought something special to this video, in fact this whole album – something only you could inspire. It's like the songs, the lyrics, the melodies come to life when you're here, or at home or sitting in the studio waiting for me to wrap up. You are truly the muse for my art." he confessed, his eyes reflecting sincerity.

You grinned and blushed, "Well, I happen to think your music brings out the best in me too, Alex. This is a great masterpiece in every sense."

As the day progressed, the scenes became more diverse, each one telling a different chapter of the song's story. From a rooftop overlooking the casino to a dimly lit jazz bar to the pool setting, the couple seamlessly transitioned from one setting to another, their connection intensifying with each passing frame.

The highlight of the video was a sequence where Alex and you found yourselves dancing under a canopy of fairy lights. The soft glow accentuated the tenderness in your movements, creating a visual poetry that mirrored the song's emotional depth. The crew watched in awe as the couple moved through the enchanting scene, your silhouettes etched against the twinkling lights.

As the day drew to a close, the final scene approached. The director wanted to capture an intimate moment between Alex and you that would serve as the emotional climax of the video. The setting was a quiet, candlelit room – a metaphorical space where their love could unfold without any distractions. A safe haven that hides all troubles and shows your true self to eachother.

The room was adorned with vintage furniture and flickering candles, casting a warm glow on as you two stood face to face. The soft strains of the song echoed in the background, creating a cocoon of intimacy around you. The director, satisfied with the day's work, whispered instructions to the cinematographer, signaling the start of the final scene.

With a subtle nod, the cameras began to roll, capturing the delicate nuances of the couple's expressions. Alex gently reached for your hand, his touch conveying a silent reassurance. His eyes locked, and in that moment, the world outside the set ceased to exist. It was just the two of them, immersed in the emotions the song evoked.

As the lyrics unfolded, Alex sang with a soul-stirring resonance, his voice intertwining with yours in a beautiful harmony. The vulnerability in your eyes told a story of love, heartbreak, and the unspoken promise of togetherness. The director, realizing the magic happening before him, chose to let the scene unfold organically, without interrupting the flow.

The room seemed to disappear, replaced by a realm where only your emotions mattered. Alex's thumb traced gentle circles on your hand, a silent gesture of comfort. Your closeness spoke volumes, transcending the scripted nature of the scene. It was a genuine moment, an unfiltered expression of the love they shared.

As the last notes of the song lingered in the air, the director called for a cut. The crew erupted into applause, acknowledging the authenticity and beauty captured in that final scene. Alex momentarily pulled out of that intimate bubble, shared a knowing smile, proud of the art you two had created together. You couldn’t stop staring at him falling deep in love within each second.

With the filming wrapped, the couple found themselves outside the studio, bathed in the soft glow of the evening. The air was crisp, and the city lights twinkled in the distance. They walked hand in hand, reflecting on the day's journey.

"I can't believe we did it," you exclaimed, your eyes sparkling with a mix of joy and exhaustion. Alex grinned, "It was magical, wasn't it? Having you by my side made it even more special. You’re really a present full of surprises aren’t you"

Later on, after leaving set, you two continued to stroll through the quiet streets, savoring the post-production bliss. The city seemed to have slowed down just for them, allowing them to relish the shared triumph. The music video, a testament to their love and collaboration, was destined to become a visual masterpiece.

Days later, as the video premiered to the world, fans and critics alike were captivated by the palpable chemistry between Alex Turner and you, (Y/N) (L/N). The comments flooded in, praising not only the song but also the genuine connection that elevated the video to a realm beyond ordinary music visuals.

In interviews, Alex and you shared snippets of their experience, emphasizing the organic nature of the collaboration. The music video, now a symbol of their artistic minds, resonated with audiences on a profound level, leaving an indelible mark on the hearts of those who watched it.

As the applause echoed and the views skyrocketed, Alex couldn't help but feel a sense of fulfillment. His journey- no Your journey together, from the studio to the screen, had not only produced a beautiful piece of art but had also strengthened the bond between eachother. The music video became a cherished chapter in your love story, a visual representation of the magic that happens when two hearts beat in perfect harmony.

#alex turner x reader #alex turner #tranquility base hotel and casino #arctic monkeys #i love him #I ADORE HIM #i had so much fun writing this #but writers block was fucking kicking my ass so hard I had to get my get back #IM UP THO #mars writing?!(rare occurrence)#LET MARS COOK 👩‍🍳

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genocidass · 1 year

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believe — joão félix

joao félix x fem!reader

wordcount: 1.6k

a/n: this is my first fxm and xreader fic i've ever wrote. also, english is not my native language.

watch it: angst, smut, cheating, unprotected sex, creampie, doggy style, (and he basically likes if you cry).

summary: you saw Joao probably flirting with another girl.

—

It was supposed to be a surprise that you came all the way to England just to see him, that you'd find him that night without his knowledge and surprise him. That you two would spend a nice night together after a couple of weeks without seeing each other.

However, you saw him whisper something to a girl at that party. She laughed at his joke, you felt the anger and disappointment build in your eyes when you saw him smile the way he smiles at you: charming and suggestive. You couldn't stay there any longer, you didn't even want to get close to complain or yell at him, you didn't want to make a scandal, you didn't want to be the center of attention for something as sad as that.

You went home, he came back not long after you arrived.

"Sorry baby, it's not what you think, it wasn't at all what it seemed."

You don't say anything, you're about to shed tears in front of him again.

"I swear that it's not like that, I came running as soon as the boys told me they saw you."

You know, you also saw them when you were leaving the club. Your chest hurts, in your throat there is a knot.

"I know what I saw, Joao" you say as a whisper, he still listens to you and denies.

"It's not like that, she's nobody, just a friend of Alex's."

"I saw how you looked at her."

"Meu amor, believe me, I would never do something like that to you, please, believe me."

He takes your face in his hands, they feel warm against your skin. His thumbs trace a path under your eyelids, and it's then that you realize you've finally collapsed in front of him without being too conscious. That your tears came out without being able to avoid it anymore, and he wipes them with his fingers.

"You know you're the one and only for me."

And you decide to believe him when he kisses your lips softly. You decide to believe him even though you know it's not the first time you've seen him in something like this. That public rumors run, that there are photos and evidence that he is cheating on you. You believe him because the way he holds you makes you do it. Because there is no way that someone who treats you with such passion and love, who says such sweet and beautiful words to you, could be lying to you.

"I'll make it up to you" he says against your lips. "Please?"

You nod. You stop crying when the kiss becomes more intense. The hand that supports your face goes down to grab your neck with a slight pressure. His lips slide until they are no longer on yours and now he gently bites your neck, leaving slight hickeys on the sensitive area.

"You are so beautiful, babe, I have missed you so much"

You let yourself be carried away by the sensations. You end up in bed, as you almost always do. He kisses every inch of your skin once you're almost naked. Teeth that bite superficially into the inside of your thighs causing you to start to get wet. Tongue that flutters over your nipples, leaving them hard and sensitive. Joao keeps saying things that sound like 'my love' and 'forgive me'. You still feel your chest hurt, but you try to ignore it and avoid thinking about it anymore.

"I love how wet you always get for me," he says against your ear as he comes back up to kiss you.

His fingers slipped under your underwear. You shudder when you feel how they sink into the small separation, feeling your fluids. Your legs wide open, because you can never deny to him. His fingers end up entering you, slowly stretching as he bites your lip.

"Joao" you moan against his mouth, your eyes pleading.

"Tell me, baby."

"Please" you don't know why you beg, it takes you a few seconds to collect your ideas. The fingers are starting to go in and out of your pussy, the feeling is good but you want more. Just like you want him to keep saying how much he loves you "Please don't ever leave me".

"I won't, amor" he says with a smile so warm that you give up immediately at that moment.

He takes off your underwear. He caresses your legs for a few seconds. His eyes drift to your pussy, which must be drenched from so much preparation. You don't want to wait any longer, you lift your hips a bit, Joao laughs softly.

"Do you want my cock so bad, baby?" he ask, you nod.

"Yes, please, please."

He enters you. He seems compassionate and tender at first, caressing your body with his big hands. Going in and out of you slowly. You can feel it fill you up, you've missed this.

"You feel so good."

You then forget whatever you saw, that doesn't matter anymore. Not when his hips start to move in a more synchronized rhythm and he hits the right spots inside of you. You can't stop moaning because of how good he feels, because of how good Joao always fucks you. Your eyes water and you tell yourself that it is not from sadness but from pleasure. He likes to see you cry while he fucks you, he always has. He doesn't stop with his thrusts, he just approaches to wipe your tears with his hand and he says things again that make you feel better. Things like 'everything will be fine, love', 'I like you so much' and 'it won't happen again'.

He starts fucking you harder. The room filled with the dirty, wet sounds of splashing and skins colliding. Joao runs a finger to your mouth without stopping to move. You suck it while looking into his eyes, because you know he loves it. You wrap your tongue around the finger, unable to stop gasping for breath.

"My good girl."

When he pulls out his finger, he also pulls out his cock of you. He asks you to turn around and get on your knees, you do so. He reintroduces himself into you, in this position you feel different, but just as good. Your face is pressed against the soft blankets of the bed, while Joao kneads your ass in his hands, sinking his fingers into the skin, while he moves you so that you are the one penetrating yourself with his penis.

You start a rhythm, going in and out, however, it's not enough for him when he starts moving his hips too. You feel him so deep inside you, so good and hard. With not too strong spankings that he gives you, with his fingers bruising your skin, making you moan and make obscene sounds.

Thrust after thrust he melts into you. You two are one in this way. No matter how many times it happens, no matter how many times he makes you feel insecure, you always come back to him, and he to you. As if neither could leave the other, as if what he says about nothing having happened was true. You don't want to care if it happened or not, you want to stop thinking about it but you can't. You feel just as good as bad. You feel how the pleasure implodes inside you next to your pain. And somehow you also enjoy that feeling.

"I love you so much" he says, his voice cracking from so much action.

"I love you too."

He feels so good how he does it to you, you know you're about to orgasm by the way your legs don't want to hold steady in that position anymore. Because you feel how you start to shudder more and more. Joao realizes this and doesn't stop. Faster and more erratic thrusts. He keeps saying how beautiful you look like this, and that you can come for him.

You touch the climax then, you moan when you feel the orgasm embrace you. Joao keeps moving inside you causing overstimulation, seeking his own pleasure. You let him use you, like you always do. You like this, you like having him inside you, the kisses from him that he is now spreading over your back and shoulders. You don't know when you dropped and your knees gave up, but he's still inside you.

"Fuck-babe, do you want me to fill you, hm?" he murmurs pasty against your skin, you emit an affirmative sound.

He asks you to get your ass back up and you do, he has better access now. You can feel him fucking you harder and faster, his balls crashing against your sensitive and overstimulated clit. You close your eyes with pleasure even if you've already come. Joao lets his cum spilled inside you, you feel when he finally orgasms. You listen to his agitated breathing and murmurs that come out of his mouth once you pull out his penis and see how the hot cream comes out of your hole. He says things that you can't fully understand, because his voice is low, but you know it's things admiring how good you look like that. He loves seeing you dripping from his cum, and you love the feeling of him leaving something from him inside you; the thick, warm liquid running down your thigh...

He cleans you with some handkerchiefs from the nightstand. Then you both hug each other lying on the bed. His body sweaty against yours, his breath still ragged. He sighs after placing a kiss on your forehead.

"There is no one like you."

And you believe him.

#joao felix x reader #joao felix x fem reader #joao felix smut #joao felix #soccer imagine #joao felix fanfic #joao felix x you #joao felix one shot

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angelofthenight · 4 months

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What Doesn’t Kill Me Pt.1

(Yandere!Alex Delarge x Fem!Reader)

Summary: You were finally free from your abusive and obsessive “boyfriend” when he was arrested with a long sentence. But when he comes back to you on his knees in tears after the Ludovico's Technique, you can’t help but welcome him back into your arms once learning that he is literally incapable of harming you ever again. Yet you begin to question your own morals.

Warnings: Yandere, Dark themes, Ladstat, Swearing/Language, Unhealthy/Abusive relationship, Sexual context/themes, Non-Con (off screen rape), Gangs, Obsessiveness, Home invasion, Sexual sadism, Physical abuse/Violence, Knife threat, Blood, Spitting, Brief pussy slapping, Alex is his own warning, You are responsible for your own content consumption

Word Count: 4.2k

( Fun Fact: I fucking hate Alex so much but I wrote a very long essay about A Clockwork Orange’s moral of redemption for my senior year of film studies class and I got an interesting idea for a yandere fic. Like how would the darling react if the yandere was “cured into being a good person”? )

Table of Contents

You hated Alex Delarge. You hated him. You loathed him. You despised him. But most of all, you were terrified of him.

On the contrary, Alex was head over heels in love with you. He was absolutely smitten with you and you were the center of his world.

You were practically forced to be his girlfriend. He just one day walked up to you and declared that you were his girlfriend now. And every day since that day was hell for you, the torturous part of hell that you are chained to.

Your soon to be nightmare all started when you two were just standing next to each other at the record store flipping through rows of records that were next to each other. He pulled out a record that caught your eye, it was one of your favorites, you thought you were the only one in town who listened to that band. Your passion for that specific artist made you smile and say aloud, “I love that record.”

He looked up at you with surprise in his eyes. He didn’t think anyone in town knew the record.

His silence made you awkwardly rant. “I honestly thought I was the only one in town who liked them. No one knew who the hell I was talking about when I would bring it up.” You gave a lighthearted laugh. “I love how the order of the songs makes a story and how each melody can, like, control what you feel. It’s a work of art. Gives me chills every time I listen to it.” You said all of this with your grin growing bigger, so happy you could talk to someone with taste.

The corner of Alex’s lips lifted up and his eyes gleamed with genuine joy, thrilled to meet someone who understands the brilliance of his favorite record. The two of you had a very long conversation about the record which extended to talking about other kinds of music. You both would drag each other around the shop to show the other some of your other favorite records.

You two instantly clicked and got along. Alex felt so comfortable with you, his mind felt at ease, and he enjoyed just simply talking with you. He’s never felt that way about anyone before. He actually enjoyed listening to you. You were so understanding, so open minded, so fascinating.

You two met in the record shop about three more times after that and would hang out for the rest of the day. You liked being around Alex. He was very funny and always put you in a good mood with his positivity. He was a very easygoing and eccentric guy; a rarity in this town full of people with sticks up their asses.

You thought nothing but good things about Alex. You really enjoyed having him as a friend. That is, until he fell for you.

In his own defense, how could he possibly not?

You were so kind and gentle with him, treating him as if he were your priority. You could get so feisty, like a house cat. As much as he loved his women defenseless and frail, your straightforward approach and no-nonsense attitude in situations that called for it really riled him up. You made him laugh and always had knowledgeable opinions. You were so smart and had an ability to be unashamedly open. And you had some real horrorshow groodies.

It was as if you were specifically and meticulously and personally made for just him. You had the same music interests as him, your exact physique was his dream girl body, your jokes always landed perfectly with him, your eyes were coincidentally his favorite color, and your breasts were the perfect size for his hands.

Alex didn’t believe in love, nor believe in wasting time seeking it. But you… you had just infected him with a fever no ice pack could soothe. Your ivy vines laced and intertwined around the wrinkles of his brain making you his constant thought. And those leaves left behind a poison ivy rash he couldn’t scratch away.

You were everything he had ever wanted. Everything he would never be… but still wanted to own.

After a night of exhilarating ultraviolence, terrorization, and vandalism with the gang, he felt such a rush. And because of that rush it was that moment where he realized he had to tell you the truth. He must have you. So he left his pals a little early to make his way straight to your apartment. He knew where you hid your spare key so it was easy storming into your living room and finding you cleaning up after yourself of your dinner.

Alex was too caught up in his adrenaline to take notice that he only took off his mask and hadn’t changed out of his gang-related wardrobe, far too focused on getting to you. But you had noticed. It was the very first thing you noticed as he stood in front of you with a breathless grin. And it was all you could focus on even as Alex declared with a cane in his hand that the reason as to why he’s been acting so strange lately was because he was in love with you.

Your iris’ were shaking and your breath was heavy within your chest as you took in the clothing from his bowler hat down to the visible codpiece. What he was wearing looked exactly like what one specific violent gang wore in the papers next to the article explaining the increase in gang terrorism due to the reduction in policing effectiveness. Juvenile delinquent gangs populated the streets because of how understaffed the police force was, most people barely even went out these days. But, for a reason you now understood, you always felt safe yourself when you went out into public, especially with Alex. But now you understood why you were safe when seen with him.

“Alex… what are you wearing? Is this a joke?” You shakingly spoke out, not responding to his confession which appeared to irk him. He took a step toward you which prompted you to take one back. Alex glanced down at his clothes and in honesty… he didn’t really care if you knew. He was creative with ways he could keep you quiet. He honestly kind of liked it if you knew.

"These here are just my nochy on the town duds with my droogs.” He announced with a sharp grin, gesturing towards his white clothes. “You won't dob me in, won't you, devotchka?” He said with a joking tone despite the threatening look in his eyes.

Your frown sunk down, your lungs feeling as if they were closing in on your heart making it harder to breathe steadily. Your hands wrung together in a nervous fashion as you seemed to cower away from someone you considered a friend. “Alex, you’re scaring me. I… I think you should leave.” You said with the delusional hope that he would respect your wish and exit the way he came.

But Alex wasn’t having it. “Leave without your answer?” He exclaimed as he held out his cane then slammed it down against your floor with one hand on his hip, tilting his head up with a sense of pride. “I think not.”

He wasn’t going to leave until he got your answer to his confession. You felt sick to the pit of your stomach. Your lips parted but no words were released. You didn’t know what to say, too caught up in the chilling realization of Alex’s secret life.

You’d be lying if you said you never really thought of him in that way, because you have once in a blue moon. How could you not with your handsome and funny male friend who always made time for you? You always teased the idea of dating him in your mind, experimented with the thought of being in a relationship with him. But it was never more than that though. More of curiosity and craving a partner rather than a crush.

You struggled to find the right words. “I… I… I feel… I-” You were torn between not wanting to encourage or provoke him yet also fearing your safety. “Spit it out, devotchka. Koshka got your tongue?” He giggled with a devilish smirk.

“I just…” You swallowed the growing lump in your throat, as if trying to swallow your fear, before it got too big that it would render you mute. “I really like you as a friend.” You fully expected him to lash out, scream at you, anything of the sort. But he simply cackled like a child.

“Nonsense, dearie!” He said in between the chuckles. “You’re just taken by surprise, is all! You’ll surely change your mind after some lubbilubbing.”

Your eyes widened in shock and horror and offense. You thrashed your arm up to point at your front door with a face full of upset anger. “Get out, Alex! I mean it!” You demanded, not believing this was all coming from someone you used to respect and think kindly of.

He, however, wasn’t phased by your raised voice and demand as he began to take swinging steps toward you, his cane lifting up to rest over his shoulder. “You’re not just gonna send me off without any sweet treat, are ya, love?” He said with a sick smile, his eyes going hooded with a predatorial shadow over his blue orbs that began to travel your body.

Your blood went cold, stinging your bones like frostbite, as you took notice of your nighttime wear. You didn’t plan for company and due to living alone you had the habit of dressing a little more indecently, as well as because you planned to go to bed right after finishing cleaning your dinner dishes. Your goosebumped skin hardly had the safety of coverage from your silk one-piece pajamas that consisted of thin tank top straps and shorts.

Your bottom lip grew so unbearably heavy that it began to shake, you taking a slow step back despite how close he’s gotten already. Your frighteningly alarmed eyes kept themselves trained on Alex’s as he stalked forward like a lion cornering an antelope, that shit-eating grin still intact.

“Y’know,” he started while he slowly began to close in on you as you walked backwards, “I think, deep down, you’re a bit of a bad girl.” He said, a tone a tad darker than before which only made your heartbeat pump painfully in your pulse. Your terror was slowly swallowing you whole like a drain.

“I think you might get a kick of it if I come on strong, just a bit rough.” He said, and before you could react in fearful panic to what he was implying, he held both ends of his cane in his hands and swung it over your head to land on your lower back. He used the position of his horizontal cane to roughly pull you closer to close the gap, sending you straight into his chest.

You gasped at the action and instantly began to struggle, throwing your hands up in an attempt to push him away by his shoulders or to at least grant some distance between the two of you. But he kept you tightly against him. “Excited now are we, eh?” He chuckled down at you, your resistance getting him all hot and bothered.

Before he confessed how he felt about you, Alex had already assumed that you felt the same way. He had an intense belief in his own perception of reality and didn’t really consider the possibility that you may not share the same feelings. His view of love was distorted and interpreted any signs of kindness or attention as your reciprocation.

But Alex was a self-aware guy. He wasn’t blind and deaf to how you clearly did not want him by how you panicked and struggled within his hold. But now that he thought about it… he didn’t really care about how you felt. Your rejection surprisingly affected him a lot less than he would’ve guessed, it actually didn’t really hurt that much.

He was naturally driven by his own twisted desires and impulses. He just wanted to exert control and power over you, rather than to seek your genuine love and affection, even though he had to admit that those would be nice to have. It was like he was in his own world, detached from the reality of reciprocal love.

He loved you. And that was all that mattered. He could still do whatever he wanted to you. And with the right tactics, he could make you do whatever he wanted. So what exact difference would your feelings make?

Alex’s cane dug into your lumbar spine, springing a pained wince past your teeth. Your attention was so focused on the pain on your skin that you gasped in unpleasant surprise at one specific tug on your body that made your pelvis grind right into the bulge of the codpiece. You stifled your whimper behind your teeth, the hard pad rubbing a sensitive part of your clit as Alex continued this action with a malicious grin.

When he got you distracted enough he took the opportunity to quickly pivot around you, rotating his cane around your body from your lower back to against your neck. The sudden harsh pressure on your throat instantly made you wheeze, your hands flying up to grasp onto the stick to try to grant you some air but to no avail due to the imbalance of strength between you and Alex.

You felt his chin rest in the crook of your neck and shoulder, his cheek also pressed against the side of your neck. You felt his smile and heard his pleasurable inhale through his nose. He was enjoying your struggle. He lifted his head so that his lips touched the shell of your ear, prompting you to make an effort to squirm away from his touch. But the grip he had on the cane across your frail throat made it easy to keep you as close as possible.

“Very well tomorrow’s your laundry day,” he practically purred into your eardrum which only created nausea that spread throughout your gut, “because those sheets of yours are about to get very merzky.”

If his innuendo hadn’t paralyzed you to absolute terror, you would’ve paid more fearful mind to the question on how he knew when you did your laundry.

You whimpered in powerless fear when he jerked you with the cane to force you to walk backwards. Well it was mostly him walking and your feet practically being dragged; your hands still remained on the cane to try to loosen its pressure on your cartilage. He led the two of you into your bedroom, jabbing his foot back to kick your door open in a wider frame. Once you were in he had tossed you onto the mattress with little care.

Tears began to prickle your eyes once you had collided into your bed, coughs following from the stinging pain on your throat as you gently touched where it hurt. You weren’t allowed much relief of personal space when Alex threw his hat to the side before crawling onto the mattress to reach you. He tightly grasped your biceps to flip you onto your back, him taking a comfortable seat on your waist.

He angled his torso above you and rocked his hips, grinding his clothed erection against your pelvis just once before he placed one hand next to your head. His other hand slowly wrapped itself around your face to force your shaking, watering eyes onto his carnivorous ones. He stared at you for a moment, a moment too long for your comfort. He stared at you and you could practically see the feverish twisted and covetous thoughts stream behind those bright blue eyes. And then a Cheshire Cat grin spread his lips after realizations awoke in his mind.

“Thou art such a beauty when you platch.” He said. The feeling of sadistic fervor and his far-too-long repressed lustful temptations were morphed together into bedroom eyes.

You went owl-eyed around your petrified pupils. Finally, you couldn’t hold the weight any longer as the situation became much too real to you and the heavy tears spilled out of your eyes. Alex’s smile widened before he pushed himself back up to straight posture, both of his hands reaching behind his back to unsheathe a dagger from his cane.

The sight of the long and sharp blade made your deep frowning lips part, a faint yelp weak in your throat. It was as if your horror stole all the words from you and left you far too terrified and weak to say anything. And your ears felt nearly deaf from the violent beating of your heart that rang in your eardrums. The only sounds you could hear were your scared sobbing wails and the sound of your pajamas ripping as he dragged the dagger down the clothing like a zipper.

Once sliced open enough, Alex placed the knife in his mouth to hold it with his teeth as he used his hands to tear it open the rest of the way. You were left in nothing but your panties, no bra due to the fact you had planned for independent slumber. But now you wished your sleeping customs were different as you laid exposed and helplessly vulnerable underneath the wicked monster you once felt joyful to call your dear friend.

And that monster’s eyes took in your vulnerability with a deranged infatuation; eyes that ravished the sight so hungrily. With the dagger still clenched between his white teeth, Alex’s hands were free to reach down and grope your breasts like dough. You whimpered with a feeble tremble, your leaking eyes squeezed shut in severe discomfort as you tightly gripped the sheets with white knuckles.

He grasped the side cups of your chest to push your bust together, giving him a better view of both of them at the same time. The action made you sharply inhale from the sensitivity, but it was as if that woke you up because you then felt the protective courage to snatch his wrists in an attempt to claw his unwanted touch off you; furious and disgusted by his animalistic audacity.

Your attempt of defense was rendered as nothing but a detriment to yourself as it was simple for Alex to free himself from your hold. One hand slammed onto your elbow to cage it to the mattress and his other hand retracted the dagger from his mouth to push it horizontally against your still hurt throat. Not hard enough to draw blood but hard enough to make you cower away from him and attempt to push yourself deeper into the mattress to escape the touch of the blade.

“Now, now, now, my dear darling.” He spoke with a sharp smile and pupils dilated in insanity. “Don’t do anything you will regret. Best to just lay back, relax, and enjoy the show. Maybe a couple of tears here and there for sweetness. But be the noble girl you always are and behave while I ravage your cunt.”

He turned the dagger diagonally to rest the tip atop the center of your collarbone. His grip on the handle was tight and you knew one wrong move on either of your ends would end with your blood gushing down your naked body. “I’d hate to carve up such elegant plott. It’d be a sin!” He tapped and glided the blade against your neck teasingly.

He leaned down to position his lips next to your ear. “But it’s a good thing I’m not a gloopy malenky dobby church boy.” He breathed out, causing your limbs to shiver in sickened fear. “I’m not afraid to get a little sinful.” He husked before he opened his mouth to drag his wet, warm tongue from your jawline up to your ear. Your joyless frown involuntary trembled.

Alex angled his face above yours, taking in your visibly terrified features and your salty rivers of tears and nearly salivating at the sight. “Now… Do you promise to behave?” He asked you with a cruel, mocking tone. The breathy, agonized sob you were holding occupied your throat so all you could do was reply with a twitchy yet compliant nod.

His smile practically lit up. “That’s my devotchka!” He exclaimed proudly before parting the dagger from your chest and instead moving it to rest against your jawline, allowing his thumb to caress your tearfully wet cheekbone. He dipped his head down to capture your lips within his for a sweet and simple kiss. He separated himself after he was satisfied with the taste to look up into your immensely glossy eyes with unfiltered fondness.

Your intoxicating lips tempted him to return for another, but quicker, deep kiss before his hands slid down your waist to hook his long fingers around the hem of your panties. He kept them there as he moved himself to come face to face with your sheltered cunt. Your frowning lips quivered as you bit them to ease your pounding heart. But not even your mind that tried to make you recite an entire work day in your head to distance yourself from your reality could distract you from Alex lifting your hips high up into the air so that he could straighten his back.

He smiled devilishly down at your forbidden flower with unhinged admiration laced within his features and eyes, your legs dangling over his shoulders. And without a hint he had shoved his nose straight into your clothed clit and took a deep, dirty inhale. You whined at the contact. He removed his nose to look down at you. “My, oh my. Your sladky von of strack is quite to die for, my dear.” He chuckled sardonically in his throat to himself before jokingly pecking a kiss to your clothed folds, creating a ‘mwah’ sound, and chuckling again at your second whine. He truly found your meek fear amusing.

He released the hold he had on your hips, letting your lower body plop back onto the bed with a bounce. Then he jumped the gun, his hands back onto the band of your panties and tugging them off down your shivering legs. Clasping his hands tightly onto your inner thighs, he pushed them apart to spread your legs wide open to put your cunt on full display for his ravishing eyes.

Breathy sobs began to invade your voice despite your desperate resistance to such. You just couldn’t believe this was happening. Your body shook as if you were freezing yet you felt your humid sweat as if you were boiling, it was a sickening feeling as your once sanguine world crumbled around you.

Alex retched inward to spit onto your clitoris, gave it a second to let his thick saliva ooze down your folds before using his fingers to rub in the slimy substance. He used an up and down then circular motion before giving it a slap, creating a wet, lewd sound.

You barely even registered Alex removing his codpiece then pants and boxers until he positioned his erection near your now wet hole and climbed on top of you, leaning his face awfully close to yours with his hands pinning your wrists. He relished the sight of your bloodshot eyes coated with hot tears and the sound of your distressed sobbing begs. A sense of sick euphoria swelled up within him.

Oh god how he adored you; his severe psychopathic obsession. Truthfully, Alex would’ve done whatever it took to have you.

He held a predatory gaze. “You’re my world, darling.” He purred to you before thrusting himself into you with a possessive claim and lustful selfishness fueling him.

Alex was right about your sheets. After a very long night of the old in-out-in-out, multiple rounds and positions and orgasms later, he finally left you on your bed and made his exit. Not without promising that he'd be back and proclaiming that you were now his and his alone though. And threatening you as well about tattling.

He was right, your sheets became filthy. They were vandalized with both of your climax’s and your blood, as well as your tears and a few rips that had been made with your gripping nails and his dagger. Your body was as vandalized as your sheets. The elegant skin of yours he seemed so fond of was now littered with bruises, hickey’s, bite marks, nail scratches, and small blade wounds (you just couldn’t stop yourself from resisting and fighting back so many times). But it seemed like he loved the sight and color of your blood as he had lapped it up every time his dagger and his teeth punctured into you.

You laid in the mess and weeped. Your mind was vandalized worse than both your sheets and body. Vandalized with betrayal, trauma, violation, dread, and a mortified horror. All of what Alex was deep down this entire time.

That was when your life became the torturous hell you had to live with.

#reader insert #yandere #yandere x reader #dark fic #alex delarge #yandere Alex Delarge #alex Delarge x Reader #yandere Alex Delarge x Reader #a clockwork orange #clockwork orange #stanley kubrick #malcolm mcdowell

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