#akutagawa comfort | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

kimetsu-chan · 14 days

Text

~can’t sleep headcanons~

A/N: I’ve been sleeping crappy the past three nights and tn I extra doubly can’t sleep, so ofc I’m writing this at 4 am 🤩 (I apologize in advance for any mistakes made—)

Characters: Akutagawa, Fyodor, Dazai, Ranpo

TWs ⚠️ reader cries, bc I cried(Fyodor, Dazai), Nicknames (Myshka)(Fyodor) (Belladonna, Donna)(Dazai), GN!Reader

Man, being tired is rough—

Akutagawa Ryūnosuke

Akutagawa most likely wouldn’t notice right away

whether that be because he is asleep, out of the house, or just busy in general

but he would come home one day to you laying face down on your shared bed, spread out like a star fish

he’d raise an eyebrow at you before checking if you were awake

once he confirmed that you were, he would question why you were up so late

and in your tired state, you would unintentionally retort back with unusual hostility in your tone

“[Name], why is it that you are awake at two in the morning.”

“Why are you just coming home from work at two in the morning.”

His mouth would instantly shut, not used to your annoyance

you would almost immediately apologize with a distraught expression on your face and he would immediately understand

seeing the reason for your stress, he quickly dismissed your earlier words

he would be quick in showering himself before slipping into bed with you and wrapping his arms around you

he didn’t really like physically affection often, he had a tough guy facade to hold up. But he guessed he could make an exception for you

Fyodor Dostoevsky

This man doesn’t sleep much either, so he doesn’t bother scolding you for it

he is likely the only one to actually be helpful about it

he would be working away at his desk in your guys’ room, and he would hear the rustling of sheets behind him

he would turn in his chair to look back at you with a blank expression

Fyodor had heard your struggles to sleep during previous nights, but tonight, you finally seemed to have had enough

he got up when he heard you angrily adjust your pillow, and made his way to the bedside before crouching down beside you

he saw the angry expression you bore on your face and blew on your face to wake you up

your teary eyes opened to glare at him and he realized just how frustrated you were

he reached out to wipe those tears before they could fall as he spoke in a quiet voice

”Now, now, Myshka, what’s with the tears?”

“‘m s’tired… but I can’t sleep no matter how hard I try-!”

Fyodor would hum in understanding, you were just exhausted

he stood back up all the way and figured he had some time to spare

he pulled you up and made his way to the kitchen with you tiredly clinging to his arm

”Let’s have a glass of milk, that should help.”

Dazai Osamu

He’s probably dead asleep beside you, and therefore won’t be of much help

there is also a good chance that he is the reason for your lack of sleep

this man will be sprawled all over you. And I mean all over you

he would have one leg thrown over yours, he would have his arm(s) wrapped around you in some way

he just has to be touching you

he also moves around a lot

which you normally don’t mind, but adding that to already not being able to sleep, geez you were frustrated

dont get me wrong, he is perfectly capable of being still and to himself in his sleep

he just doesn’t want to-

he can’t help wanting to be in constant contact with his precious Belladonna all night

but when you nudge him awake with tears ready to fall from your eyes, he instantly throws his wants out the window

he’d frown and wipe your tears away before asking what was wrong

“Oh ‘Donna— why are you crying?”

“I can’t- sleep, and you’re movin’ around s’much and it’s not helping..”

You didn’t mean to make it sound like it was his fault (even though it kinda was-)

but I’m your exhausted state, you couldn’t control it

instantly filled him as he pressed a kiss to your forehead

“I’m sorry ‘Donna… I’ll be still, I promise”

Ranpo Edogawa

Just like Dazai, he is likely the reason you cannot sleep in the first place

I headcanon that he is also a super restless sleeper in the sense that he moves a whole bunch

and maybe even kicks

so imagine you’re tired, and almost falling off the bed because he is taking all the space

deciding that you had enough, you grabbed your pillow and a spare blanket and trudged over towards the couch before plopping your tired self right down on it

you closed your eyes with a huff when you tucked yourself in, and began to drift off when you felt a weight on you

you opened your eyes to see Ranpo looking down at you

there was concern in his eyes, despite the unserious-ness of his statement

”[Name]? Why’d you leave? The world’s best detective needs his cuddle buddy.”

You quickly explained the reason of his absence and he nodded

you waited for a few seconds for him to leave, but he just stayed on top of you and made himself comfortable

“I guess I’ll just sleep on top of you then!”

His weight was actually kinda nice, and he was making an effort to be as still as possible

you eventually were pulled to sleep with the sound of your lover’s soft breathing in your ears

A/N: these were fun to write 🥰

but they took an hour—

n e ways

it is now almost five in the morning so I might as well just be up for the rest of the day 😃

Reblogs with tags are appreciated!

172 notes · View notes

j11nko · 6 months

Text

heaven sent

1K notes · View notes

anqelically · 10 months

Text

they have nightmares about you headcanons pt.2

featuring...! chuuya nakahara, ryunosuke akutagawa & sigma

content: no manga spoilers, comfort

navi | bsd masterlist | pt.1

CHUUYA NAKAHARA

• you were cheating on him in his nightmare

• the day seemed to be going normal for chuuya. he left work to come home to something that was anything but normal. another pair of shoes were at the door- a guy’s shoes. that’s when everything turned upside down

• he hurried into your shared home when he found another guy’s hands all over you. and it wasn’t just anyone, not to chuuya. his former brown-haired partner separated his lips from yours before he sent chuuya a smug grin

• meanwhile, you could only look at chuuya sadly before looking back at dazai. it broke his heart to see you just wrap your arms around dazai a bit tighter, not daring to defend yourself

“hm, seems he came back a bit sooner than we thought, huh?” dazai hummed.

“shut up,” you murmured, “you’re the one who lost track of time.”

• when he woke up, that sense of being betrayed hit chuuya hard. his heart raced as he turned his body around to look at you, who was just innocently sleeping

• he knew you’d never do such a thing, but dazai’s grin was taunting him in his head. and as if you could sense his troubles, you began to wake up. you tiredly rubbed your eyes as you looked at chuuya, who seemed spooked

“hey,” you asked, concerned, “what’s wrong? you look hurt…”

“my mind was messing with me, that’s all.”

you watched as chuuya tried to play it off, but it wasn’t working. you were no fool. you were the most perceptive out of the port mafia executives, so no one could hide anything from you, especially not your boyfriend.

“you look a bit paler than usual, chuuya. sweat’s dribbling down the side of your head as well. tell me what happened. i’m all ears.”

• once you’ve heard everything, chuuya feels embarrassed. you joined the port mafia after dazai left, so you don’t even know the guy

• not only that, he was both frustrated and upset that you had the audacity to cheat on him with dazai of all people in his nightmare. trust and loyalty are qualities chuuya holds dear, and you happened to break them

• you laugh it off before telling him that it’s normal to feel that way. you continue to comfort him and once he feels better about it all, chuuya holds you close. his arms are wrapped around your waist as the two of you fall asleep again

• this time, he finally gets to punch dazai in the face (yes he is happy, even if it’s a dream)

RYUNOSUKE AKUTAGAWA

• you were kidnapped in front of his eyes in his nightmare

• nothing scares this man more than having something important slip out of his grasp. in this scenario, you were taken away from him by a group that was fighting with the port mafia. not only that, but he never seen you ever since

• when he wakes up, although he knows it’s a nightmare, there is still a heavy sense of unease in his body. akutagawa would feel short of breath, grasping at his shirt to calm down

• but when he sees that you aren’t in bed with him, he’s alarmed and finds himself rushing out of bed. he looks around the bedroom, the bathroom, the living room. when he finds you in the kitchen, he’s more relieved than he thought he’d be

“ryu?” you greet your lover in shock. cold sweat dribbled down the side of his face as he heaved, letting out a cough as you stepped closer.

it was almost 3 in the morning, and you were only up because you had the sudden urge to use the bathroom and get yourself some water.

“what’s wrong? tell me.”

• i see him as the type to just pretend nothing is wrong, meaning he’d say he’s fine and try to head back to the bedroom. you are faster to act, however, meaning that he wasn’t going anywhere without telling you what happened

• he’d react rather harshly, probably smacking your hand away by reflex if you tried to get a hold of him. though, he’d quickly apologize because he knows it’s wrong of him to do that

• getting akutagawa to confess will take persistence from you. he’s stubborn, so getting him to change his mind wouldn’t be so easy

• but once you get him to tell you everything, akutagawa feels a sense of relief. hold him close and tell him you won’t leave him because i feel like akutagawa would need that the most at the moment :((

SIGMA

• you ended up using sigma in his nightmare

• by organization after organization, sigma was always being used. although you wouldn’t dare to do the same, his nightmare led him to believe you did

• sigma was walking himself towards his office, knowing who was inside. but before he entered, he could hear your voice as you spoke with fyodor and nikolai

“oh, he’s wrapped around my little finger like the fool he is,” you laughed. “a desperate man who can’t remember things of his past is nothing. he’ll do anything i ask for specifically, so proceed with the plan.”

• hearing that come from you had broken his heart. he awoke with a loud gasp, and his movement managed to wake you up as well. his hands were buried in his uneven layers of hair, grasping them so tightly you were afraid they may fall off

• you have to pull his hands away before you ask what’s wrong. and when you do, sigma lowers his head in shame. he probably thinks it’s wrong for him to even imagine you doing that, even if that dream was out of his control

“it’s nothing, y/n,” sigma reassured you. “my mind is playing games, i know you wouldn’t do that.”

• sigma may say that, but it doesn’t stop the fear from being instilled into his veins. what if you do end up using him? what if he just becomes another pawn in someone else’s game? sigma hates to think that way, but he can’t help it

• in need to calm down, sigma would probably go outside for fresh air. let’s be honest, the casino man definitely has a balcony connected to his room

• when you join him, sigma is already staring at the night sky. it’s also probably cold, so bringing a little blanket over your shoulders wouldn’t hurt

• he’d probably ask what you’re doing outside with him, or tell you that you should go back to sleep. he doesn’t want to trouble you further, but we all know it doesn’t matter

“nothing’s going to be resolved if you don’t tell me what’s wrong,” you honestly told sigma. “if it’s about that dream… i hope you know i would never do anything like that.”

a flash of hesitation is seen on sigma’s face, and he lets out a quiet sigh, “what if you leave? what if… what if this is a dream? what happens when we wake up to reality?”

you stared at him in surprise, “you need to wake up. this, me and you, is reality.”

using the blanket you brought with you, you also wrap it around sigma before pulling him into an unexpected embrace. the dual-haired man grabs your waist on reflex, and the two of you stand like that for a while.

eventually, you take his hand and place it over your chest. beneath his slim fingers, sigma can feel the beating of your heart. his lips part at its quickened pace.

“my heart genuinely beats for you, sigma. please, don’t doubt it. the last thing i’d ever do is try to use you.”

• and that’s all it takes for sigma to lose it. crying or not, he hugs you like it’s your last :((

note: PART TWO DONE!!! i don't like it but yeah.. also the bullet format is different so it’s easier to post my stuff to wattpad 😗

reblogs are appreciated + join my taglist !

@seisitive @enomane @er0ses @spenzitz @wineaddict2904 @aeshiiteiru @chuuyrr @ashthemadwriter @sanjis-fav-w1fe @bejeweledgirl @ma3mae @piichuu @dreamlessimp

#୨୧ [ writing ]#bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #chuuya x reader #chuuya nakahara x reader #akutagawa x reader #sigma x reader #bsd headcanons #bsd comfort #bsd hcs #bsd #bungou stray dogs

2K notes · View notes

originalartblog · 1 year

Text

(domestic skk?? here???)

Sometimes it's hard to be vulnerable but they're working on it.

#i decided i'm nice again #@carrotkicks you destroyed me with chuuya plushie angst i'm riposting with the chuuya plushie comfort that possessed me #also coming out as someone who draws dazai's hair like they're dog ears it's like atsushi's single hair stripe and tail-belt #look up french spaniels look at their ears and tell me that's not dazai #(chuuya can be a cocker spaniel. or a cavalier spaniel. to match.)#bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #bsd fanart #bsd chuuya #bsd nakahara chuuya #bsd dazai #bsd dazai osamu #skk #soukoku #nawy's comics #i put chuuya in that outfit when thinking how akutagawa has civilian clothes so chuuya must hang out in something else too #but since i gave him the same thing for my AU it can be whatever now #aaaaaugh i've been looking at this for too long i can't say if it's good or not WHATEVER #getting out of your comfort zone is hard. i don't do domestic stuff. i do jokes and concepts and canon stuff.

2K notes · View notes

kyouka-supremacy · 7 months

Text

BSD Beast clean cover

574 notes · View notes

catmelonwriting · 13 days

Note

Oohmygofd pleaaase plsplspls write bulimic reader... As some1 who's bulimic i will die if u do (positively)

BSD Men with a bulimic!reader

Warnings: Bulimia, not proofread, vomit type purging, very self inserted and based off my experiences, bad body image, reader is not underweight, hurt/comfort, a couple usages of (name) in akutagawa's bc I just can't see this man using pet names

Characters: Akutagawa, Chuuya

A/N: I'm sooo glad I'm not the only one who wanted this.. I was really hesitant to write it bc my blog is entirely smut and that usually does better than hurt/comfort, angst, or fluff, but if I'm not the only person who wants it I'm deffy gonna write it!! I don't really like Akutagawas I definitely didn't do him justice but I loveeeee chuuya's

Akutagawa

- Probably will not notice until you tell him.. just thinks you're sick or something when he hears coughing noises from the bathroom.

- From then on he's really concerned, he'll probably do a lot of research on it (w/o you knowing ofc)

- Will try and get you into treatment, even just IOP, but if you refuse HE is going to monitor everything your eating

- If you do end up binging in the middle of the night or while he's not there, the bathroom is off limits for the next 45 minutes.

- He will literally stand in the way of the doorway if you try to go, he's not risking anything.

- If you try not to eat too much the next day to 'make up for it' he'll sit with you while you eat and give you encouraging words here and there, but neither of you are getting up till your finished.

One shot

You're kneeled over the bathroom toilet, the back of a toothbrush nudging your throat, when you let out a loud gag. You immediately take the toothbrush out and cover your mouth.. you had learned to be so quiet after akutagawa found out about your eating disorder, how could you let that happen?

You hear footsteps approaching the bathroom door before three short knocks. "Yeah, Ryū?" You ask, your voice was raspy and you sounded like you had been crying. Fuck, he knows.

"..(Name) are you alright? Are you doing something you shouldn't?" His voice was sharp, like he was angry. You knew he wasn't, you knew he would never be angry at your for something like this.. just.. upset, but you can't help the guilt that courses through your body at his words.

"No." You choke out, shuffling to shove the toothbrush back in the holder. "I heard gagging." You clear your throat, trying to get rid of the rasp. "Um.. I wasn't. Just coughing. I'm not feeling well." You call out, quickly flushing your thrown up dinner down the toilet. "I'll be out in a second."

You dig in the drawers for your perfume, air freshener, dry shampoo, anything you can spray to cover up the smell of your throw up, but you couldn't find anything. So you hesitantly clean your hands and leave the bathroom with the overwhelming smell of vomit filling it.

"Hey, love." You mumble, sitting down next to him on the couch, your voice shaky. "..(Name), don't lie to me. I know what you were doing." He mumbles, placing his hand on the back of your head, pulling you closer to him. You blink back tears as you push your face into his chest. "Im sorry.. I'm so so sorry.. I didn't mean to.. I didn't.." you choke out, sniffling.

"Don't apologize to me, dear. I'm not mad, or even upset. Just.. concerned. You told me you would stop." His voice sounded sympathetic, something you weren't used to with him. The smell of cigarette smoke hung on your jacket, a scent you had grown to love and found comforting since meeting him. The way his lanky, boney, ring covered fingers glided through your hair, his soft voice, it all comforted you, it all told you it was okay to cry.

His heart ached at the little gasps and sniffles and whimpers you let out whilst sobbing into his chest. It made him want to start bawling with you, but of course he wouldn't. He could never appear weak to you. "I'm sorry- I'm so sorry Ryu- I just can't stop- I can't stop no matter how hard I try.." you sob, hands moving to cling onto the fabric of his shirt. "I'm so sorry!"

"Oh baby.." he sighed. You didn't want to look up, you know he's looking down with pity. Pity you didn't want. "It's alright. I don't want you to cry, it's not your fault.. I understand- well, no, I don't. I don't understand, but I want to help you." Wrapping his arms around you, he leans into your head, the scent of your shampoo filling his nose.

That's where you two lay for the rest of your night, him whispering comforting words in your ears, giving you all the love you could ever ask for, something you'd never expect from a man like him.

Chuuya

- He notices within the first month of FRIENDSHIP

- The way you get up and scurry off to the bathroom after every meal you share, the guilt on your face after grabbing a third serving at the party you two are at, how quick you shove shit down your throat before tears well up in your eyes and you excuse yourself.. all of it.

- He definitely cares, but probably won't confront you about it till later on in the friendship if you're still having trouble

- He won't just send you a lousy "have you been eating properly?" Text either, he's gonna invite you over to his house making it known you two are gonna have a serious conversation, then sit you down in his living room then prod and probe till you admit it.

- If you're still struggling w/ it when you're dating/when you move in together (which you probably are bc eds are harsh) he'll be like Akutagawa and monitor everything you eat, just a little more stealthily

- He is not afraid to tell you to slow down if you seem to be overeating.. he takes the binging just as seriously as the purging.

Oneshot

You had awakened in the middle of the night with a need for food. Anything you could get your hands on you needed inside of you asap.

You quickly and carefully slipped out of his arms and out of bed, tip toeing to the kitchen and flicking the light on. The first thing you see is a brand new box of cereal you had bought today, Chuuya hadn't had it in awhile, it was his favorite as a kid and he seemed happy while buying it. Guilt tote through you when you ripped open the box and shuffled handfuls into your mouth, before discarding the half empty box on the ground.

You reached for the cake you two had made for your birthday last week, taking fistfuls with your bare hands and shoving the icing covered cake in your mouth.

After shoving everything in vicinity down your throat, you open the fridge to find a diet coke, or a regular, just anything with bubbles.. anything with carbonation to help you get this all up better. Anything. Your eyes land on an energy drink you had bought yesterday.. you were saving it for today, but in your eyes you needed it now.

You crack it open and glug it down, before looking at the mess you made on the floor. Empty boxes, half eaten cake, a carton of half eaten cookies, an empty bowl that was previously filled with salad, an empty milk carton.. you felt sick to your stomach. You needed this out of you now. Now.

You quietly tip toe to the bathroom, turning off the kitchen lights behind you and locking the door behind you, kneeling on the ground in front of the toilet. You hated doing this, you hated how gross you felt hovering over something where your ass went.. but you needed it gone. You couldn't gain weight.. you already felt so fat as it is no matter how much chuuya tried to convince you you're average.. you just couldn't believe it. Looking in the mirror all you could see was piles of fat.

You push the back of your toothbrush down your throat, gagging almost silently as the first few things came up. You recognized some chocolate, veggies, something.. red.. you didn't want to think about it too much as you shoved the toothbrush back down your throat. You watched as everything you ate came up opposite to the order you had it in.

Finally, you recognize barely chewed lumps of cereal fall into the toilet, and after you throw up stomach acid mixed with dark blood, you sigh, wipe your mouth and stand up, flushing the toilet, and clean yourself up.

Walking out of the bathroom, you see the kitchen lights on. Fuck. You could've sworn you turned those off.

Your ginger haired boyfriend turns the corner from the kitchen, looking you dead in the eyes with disappointment on his face. You wished you could just evaporate. "Love, what is this?" He sounded.. exasperated. Tired of you, tired of your illness, tired of having a girlfriend who can't just eat normally. You were tired of it too, but the Internet made recovery seem so much easier than it really was.

Tears flow out of your eyes as you wipe the remaining spit dribbling from your mouth away. "Did you throw up?" He sighs.. you can't tell if he's being sympathetic or if he's annoyed. Maybe both. All you can muster is a nod before you fall into his chest, letting out broken sobs and choking out apologies. From where you are you can glance into the kitchen, noticing he had cleaned up the little mess you made.

God, not only did he have to deal with such an emotional, disordered girlfriend.. he had to clean up after you too? You felt like such a terrible person, like you didn't deserve his love.

"Cmon, sweetie, let's go to bed. Let me tuck you in." He mutters sleepily. "Don't apologize.. don't apologize, it's not your fault. You know I'm not mad." His whispers comfort you and make you feel worse at the same time, you didn't understand it. "I'm not mad, just worried. I could never be mad at you." He speaks softly, nudging you towards the open door of your bedroom.

You whimper and sniffle as he tucks you into bed, before getting back in himself and wrapping his arms around your waist. He leans in, whispering sweet nothing's in your ear, tracing shapes in your hip, telling you you're beautiful and it'll all be okay until you fall asleep.

When you wake up the next morning, Chuuya isn't there. He must've gone to work already. You see a small note on the bedside table next to you, and hesitantly pick it up to read its contents.

"Hey doll, I'm sorry I left for work before we could talk about this in-person, and I definitely have a plan to speak to you about it tonight. But I wanted to let you know I'm not mad at you, nor am I upset with you, I'm just concerned for your well-being and safety. I want to get you into some treatment program because I'm not trained in this, and I don't really know how to help. I know this isn't entirely about your weight or how your body looks, but baby believe me when I say you're beautiful. You are the most gorgeous girl I have ever laid my eyes on and I am so lucky to have you. You are not 'too much' and your emotional baggage is not too much for me to carry. Even if it was, it's worth it for a girl as sweet and caring as you.

Love, Chuuya"

You hold the note close to your chest and push yourself backwards into bed, draping the covers over yourself and falling back asleep with his letter held close.

151 notes · View notes

raccoonwxrks · 4 months

Text

Some months ago I read "Confession of a Mask" by Yukio Mishima and suddenly Shin Soukoku took over my thoughts 👁️👁️

The idea is similar to the book but less...cruel??

Idk if you read the book you know what I'm talking about--

#bungo stray dogs fanart #digital art #bungou gay dogs #bungou stray dogs #shin soukoku #sskk #atsushi nakajima #akutagawa ryuunosuke #bsd aktugawa #bsd atsushi #atsushi x akutagawa #this au is angst but at least there's some comfort too #akutagawa got some problem but he's working on that #atsushi needs an hug

174 notes · View notes

exquisitesimp · 7 months

Text

Comforting Akutagawa during a mental breakdown

A/N: Hello to everyone reading this! I’m back at it again with Bungo Stray Dogs, more particularly the Port Mafia. In this story, the reader (F) is giving comfort and affection to her emotionally damaged boyfriend Akutagawa, after an unfortunate encounter with his old mentor figure (aku was my first love in bsd). Thank you so much for reading and interacting with my posts, it means so much to me! Stay healthy, eat well and drink plenty of water! - Sam

Tags: Bungo Stray Dogs, Akutagawa Ryunosuke, angst, reverse comfort, SFW

Warnings: mental breakdown, emotional and physical abuse, NSSI

Word Count: approx. 4.8k

It was one of these nights again; these difficult, heart-wrenching nights that constantly made you question the meaning of such a life, a life filled with pain and suffering. You’ve become a little too familiar with this feeling since you’ve experienced, well… a little too many nights like these.

“Remember what you’re doing all this for!” you exclaimed.

Except there was nobody there to listen, save for the librarian that was sick of having you be the last one to leave the library in the dark hours of the early morning for the fifth time this week. Talking to the void, maybe all that studying did drive you insane after all.

“You scared the life out of me, for the love of god!”, the lady gasped, jumping awake from the information desk. Poor her, she probably hated these nights even more than you did.

“I’m terribly sorry”, you said, chuckling in awful embarrassment.

She gave you a cold stare, which truthfully saddened you deep down, because you were under the false impression that you had bonded with the woman by now.

“Don’t look at me like that ma’am”, you said, “You know med school isn’t a piece of cake…”

“I know dear”, she responded with a certain sweetness in her voice and a tired sigh, “but isn’t it time to go home soon?”

You looked at the clock above the information desk. It read 2:45. A look of desperation channeled itself on your face as you were thinking about just how much more work you had ahead of you before you could allow yourself to go home and finally get some shuteye.

“Just one more unit, I promise!” you lied, knowing damn well that it was much, much more than that.

“Pfftt….Like we haven’t heard that before…” the librarian mumbled as she began moving around all sorts of books and paper sheets around the information desk.

Of all the times during the day she could get that taken care of, she had to do it right now? The noise she made was getting on your nerves and messed with your focus. However, you knew she was going to kick you out for sure if you dared complain about it. So you just decided to let it go, for your own good perhaps…

Resting your head which had grown quite heavy and dizzy on top of the open books, you sighed in exhaustion, waiting for the woman to stop messing with the papers and your concentration along with them. Wondering how the hell you were supposed to pass all these exams the following week, you were just sitting there, beating yourself up for always leaving things for the last possible moment. But not even a minute later, your phone, which was laying on the table, suddenly buzzed and stopped your overthinking.

It was a voice message from your boyfriend, a little smile subtly forming on your face upon seeing the notification. You’ve been together for almost a year, but the habit of smiling at his texts hasn't faded away whatsoever.

“Ma’am, can I pleeaase use my phone?”, you joked, since there was obviously nobody there to be disturbed by mobile phone usage… except for the poor lady of course. “It’s my sweetheart!”

A few moments of deadly silence followed. From the look on her face, you’d think she was finally done with your smart-ass idiocy.

“Eh, to hell with it…” she responded, having accepted — to your grand surprise — that she’d have you here for quite a while once again.

“God bless your patience! I shall treat you to a huge meal once these detestable exams are over!”, you proclaimed in comedic exaggeration, yet genuinely wanting to express your gratitude to her in some sort of way. With your late-night hypertension and your endearingly annoying sense of humor, you could imagine that having you study here all these days must have been quite a handful.

“Who said I wanted to have a meal with you?”, she shrugged and rolled her eyes.

Purposefully ignoring her rhetorical question with a smile on your face, you opened the message and placed your phone next to your head with the speaker facing your ear, the woman sighing at your shenanigan in the background.

“Hey, Y/N…”

You didn’t expect to hear Gin’s voice.

“Listen… I found my brother’s phone in a dark alley on the ground, and it’s all cracked up now, and I’m not quite sure what happened... He was still supposed to be here, but I assume there was some big trouble and he had to flee. Problem is— TACHIHARA CAN YOU JUST SHUT THE F— sorry about that… problem is I contacted our headquarters and he’s not there”

Your eyes opened wide as the message kept on playing. Two opposing forces fighting in your brain; one worrying that something terrible has happened to him, the other trying to remain cool-headed since you didn’t know any crucial details about the situation.

“My guess would be that he’s at your place. I know you have a lot of work to do in the library, but please check if everything’s okay with him. Gotta go, the Armed Detective Agency is just around the corner”

You heard the words “Armed Detective Agency” and you instantly knew what this was about.

“Oh fuck” you said out loud and stood up from your desk as if struck by some invisible thunder.

“What is it this time?”, the librarian desperately asked.

“It’s your lucky day”, you replied, packing up your bag in quick, messy movements, “I’ve got to go right now”

“Good grace”, she mumbled as she started switching off the lights to finally close the place down for the night.

“Thanks for everything!”, you shouted hurriedly, storming out of the university library and rushing to the parking lot.

You jumped in your car and immediately started the engine. You already knew by now that no encounter with the Agency could possibly be any good for Akutagawa. And this time, you had a strong feeling that something was very, very wrong.

In less than half the time it would usually take, you sloppily drove back to your apartment, very lucky that you hadn’t crushed the car onto anything on the way there. Running with light steps and pushing through your own fatigue, you finally reached the door and knocked on it.

“Sweetie?”, you called out softly.

There was complete silence on the other side, a type of silence that grew an unshakeable fear within you. After taking a deep breath, you reached for the keys in the pocket of your jacket and slowly opened the door.

You took a good look at the living room before entering, and everything was exactly the way you left it, including the little lamp you always kept switched on even when nobody was home. From where you were standing, nothing seemed wrong with the kitchen either. At first glance it all looked perfectly normal, but there was something very intuitively suspicious about this quietness that consumed the entire place.

Due to your intensive studying at the library the past few days, you ended up coming home at times like these almost every day, and you found the emptiness to be serene, and even comforting in its own way. But now it was frantically maddening, as if you’d be crazy to assume someone else was here, but equally as insane to think that you were totally alone.

You gulped as you took a few steps in and closed the door behind you, cold shivers running down your body. Only while taking off your own shoes did you look down to check if his were there, and much to your relief, they were just beside the door. You immediately felt a weight fall off your shoulders, knowing now that nobody had broken in or that you weren’t… imagining things.

You quietly made your way right in front of the shut door of your bedroom, and since you already passed by the empty bathroom, you knew that was the only place where he could possibly be. Just by standing there you felt a dark chilly aura strike you down to the bone.

Knowing about his occupation and even his abusive past, you were already aware that Akutagawa was very much capable of becoming violent. But this wasn’t the first time he went through a crisis like this with you, so you had faith that if you stood there for him once again, it would all work out, just like the previous times.

You plucked up all the courage you had inside you and knocked on the door.

“Sweetie?”, you repeated. “Are you alright?”

Once again, no answer. At this point you started getting worried. That was the only place he could be, right? Then why was he not responding?

Making the tiniest amount of sound possible, you pushed the door open ever so slightly to peek through the crack, and that’s when you saw something you’ve never witnessed before.

Although the light switch was on, the room was pitch black with only a few strands of light somehow making their way through. Sinister branches of darkness were spread all over, some intertwined with one another in an infernal veil, and others ruthlessly piercing the entirety of the space like enormous, sharp blades.

You were completely astounded. You had no idea that Rashoumon could take on such a petrifying form.

Before you could even begin to grasp the density and the complexity of what your eyes just viewed, the door was somehow explosively shut inches away from your face, causing you to gasp at the thunderous noise.

“HOW MANY TIMES HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT THE DOOR?”, Akutagawa yelled, his strung out voice echoing within his ability’s construction.

“I’m sorry sweetie”, you responded peacefully, “I just wanted to check if you’re okay…”

“What does this look like to you?” he asked sarcastically, while Rashoumon locked the door from the inside, eliminating any possibility that he’d just let you in that easily.

“What I meant is, are you physically okay? Did you get hurt?”, you asked, trying to maintain your calm composure.

“I’m intact”, he answered as if even such a small question was so immensely bothersome to him at that moment, “now LEAVE. ME. ALONE!”

“How am I supposed to leave you alone in a state like this?”

He didn’t respond, but it’s not like you expected him to. Hurt and afraid, he always hid inside his hard shell at times like this, and it took a lot of strength and effort to get him to open up to you. You took a big breath, because the difficult part was just starting.

“Your sister found your phone somewhere in the city and contacted me…”, you began.

“I don’t wanna talk about this…” he growled as rage kept building up within him.

“I know it’s difficult to talk right no—“

“THEN CUT IT OUT”, he screamed with a trembling voice and paused for a second, “before I break the door…”

“You don’t have to talk about it right now, but please just listen”.

You paused for a while to see what his reaction would be. Although he was once again mute, you were quite happy that you didn’t get smashed by the door; it meant he was waiting for you to speak.

“I know you’re not feeling well right now, and I just want to let you know that it’s totally okay to feel this way, even though I don’t know what exactly happened… I just wanted to tell you…”.

Another silence-filled pause ensured you that he was still listening.

“You did the right thing to come here, sweetie… The fact that you’re here right now means that even if you want me to leave you alone this instant, some part of you wants to find comfort here… And that’s exactly what I want to do for you right now. I just want to make it better, I promise. Please, Aku…Let me help you…”

No response.

“I’ll be waiting right behind the door for as long as you need. Please don’t break me along with it, or better yet, let me in whenever you feel like…”

It wasn’t much later that you heard the door finally unlock behind you, so you stood up, carefully opened it, and saw that your previously unimaginably ominous room was now just the way you remembered it.

Akutagawa was sitting on the floor in the corner across the room, curled up so he could take up as little space as possible. He had wrapped his arms around his knees and held them closely against his chest. His cloak was thrown over his shoulders, covering most of his upper body and his head was buried on his forearms.

You quietly approached him and sat next to him to keep him at ease. All these months in a relationship with him taught you that at times like these, he felt threatened by people sitting right opposite him, and didn't respond to them so well. He also deeply despised being looked at when he’s in such a vulnerable state, so you respected his wishes and looked at the floor, avoiding his eyes at all costs.

“Take your time, sweetie. I’m here to listen”, you said after a minute or two.

He took a big breath before lifting his head up, while you made sure to make him feel as comfortable as you could, based on his own individual terms.

“The Command Unit was sent to the center of Yokohama to investigate some strange movements in the black market… and there, I ran into that stupid weretiger...”

“Mhm hm”, you nodded as you kept listening carefully.

“We started a fight and I had cornered him in this alley… that was all until he showed up…”

“Dazai?”, you asked, just to make sure your assumptions were correct.

“Yes…” , he answered as his voice got weaker. “He nullified my ability and told the weretiger to leave, so it was just the two of us…”

You noticed it was getting harder and harder for him to speak as the conversation shifted towards Dazai. It was no surprise since he’d talked to you about him before but it was, nonetheless, upsetting to hear.

“No…”, you said, “and what did he do?”

“Well, he…”, Akutagawa said and then paused as if to collect himself, “he kicked me right below the chest and I was on the ground coughing…”

He took a breath, before proceeding to give you the rest of the story.

“And he said some things… something about the weretiger being better than me… but I’ve heard that before…”

“Aw sweetie—“

“He knows…”, he said, burying his head on his knees once again. “He found out about my disease somehow…”

When you heard him quietly weep, you moved a little closer to him, just enough so that he didn’t feel alone in this difficult, doleful moment. Before you could even begin to ask how Dazai managed to find that out, Akutagawa jumped into your arms and buried his head on your shoulder, letting his black cloak fall off his frail body.

As he did that, you didn’t fail to notice that his white shirt had bloody stains on each sleeve, a little bit above the length of the elbow. Both sides had five holes each, one for each of his own fingers that had been digging into his skin, scratching and ripping it apart.

You were so upset, but you realized that it would be no good to address it right now. So instead, you wrapped him up in the warm embrace that he desperately needed at the time.

“That lung disease you have is going to kill you soon… Maybe then, I’ll consider coming back to the Port Mafia… Such a shame that… even when you leave your last pathetic breath… there won’t have been a single moment… when you were better than my new apprentice…”

“That’s what he said to me…”, he uttered, sobbing in between these nasty, horrible phrases.

Your eyes started watering as you squeezed him tighter against you. It was beyond you how anybody could be so viciously cruel to someone so loyal and devoted, even if fate brought it so that they parted ways.

“That’s so hurtful…”, you whispered as tears were running down your cheeks. “It’s okay… Let it all out, I’m right here…”

“Why? Just why?!”, he cried in anguish, “How much more must I do? When will all this be over? When will I ever be enough?!”

You didn’t know how to respond to such questions at times like these, so you just let him lash out until he hopefully calmed down eventually.

“What am I saying? That’s never gonna happen…”, he lamented as his body started shivering, “I’m so sorry, Y/N… I’m a worthless and pathetic fool…”

“That’s not true…please stop saying things like that…”, you pleaded.

“I’m just gonna die so pointlessly… And it won’t even matter to him…”

“Well it’s gonna matter to me!”, you raised the tone of your voice, verklempt and teary-eyed.

His chest kept pumping against yours as he was struggling for breath.

“I’m so sorry my love…”, you apologized, fearing that all you just did was worsen his situation by letting your own emotions take over. He tried to say something, but in this state, coherent words couldn’t come out of his mouth.

You had to stay strong and help him during this difficult time. Right now, the situation wasn't about you.

“Listen to me, let’s take some deep breaths okay? Breathe in till four, hold till four, and breathe out till six. Can you do that for me?”

You felt him nodding yes, lifting his head up and letting his chin rest on your shoulder.

“Perfect, I’ll count: 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6…”

Akutagawa tried to follow your count as much as he could. You had to do this exercise about fifteen times before his breathing took its normal pace back. Your hand was always gently caressing the back of his head, and with every round you completed, you made sure that he knew he was doing a good job.

“I’m so proud of you”, you murmured and kissed his temple, “are you feeling any better now?”.

He nodded yes and sniffed his nose.

“Can I look at you?”, you asked.

He sighed, then nodded yes once again. Once he let go, you gently cupped his face and lifted his head up so you could look at him. His poor, restless eyes were ever so red and puffy from all the tears he’d been shedding.

“My sweet Aku…”, you whispered, “if only there was something I could do to take your suffering away… I can only imagine how terrible it feels to be treated so horribly by someone you look up to so much, to always feel like you’re the second option…”

You paused to take a big breath and collect yourself.

“And I know it’s not the same to hear it from me… but you’re always going to be my first choice… always…”

A sad, bitter smile morphed into your boyfriend’s face upon hearing these words, as if they were half-empty, not coming from a certain someone he’d want to hear them from instead.

“I’ll always be here for you… You’re my everything, my love… I love you more than anyone and anything in this world… And seeing you suffer like this… it crushes me…”

Akutagawa sat there in silence, guiltful and grey, shifting his gaze to the cold, hard floor.

“Especially this…” you said with a cracking voice, and looked at the red stains on his sleeves, “this just… it breaks my heart…”

His withering eyes were filling up with tears again.

“Promise me you won’t do it again…please…”, you begged.

“I promise…I’m so sorry…”

“Don’t be sorry sweetie, none of this makes you weak in my eyes…. You’re so strong… so much more than you think…”

You looked at him sweetly before pulling him closer to give him a soft kiss on the mouth, his lips passive, almost motionless against yours.

“Now go have a warm shower, you need to relax”, you said, getting up from the floor and offering him a helping hand to stand up as well. “Make sure that a lot of water runs over your wounds. I’ll take care of them once you’re done, okay?”

“Okay”, he answered, giving you his hand, letting you pull him up and still hold him all the way to the bathroom.

“Thank you so much, Y/N… really…”

“Don’t mention it”, you responded lovingly.

As he shut the door behind him, you immediately got this morbid feeling, this insurmountable urge to break down and cry.

You loved him with all your heart, but in comparison to even the tiniest praise from Dazai, your love for Akutagawa didn’t matter nearly as much to him. And that thought pained you so much, it cut deeper than a knife… In a way, you could even say you understood him, knowing that your one and only was gonna leave you soon, and that you’ll always come second, till the last moment… till his last moment, his very last breath…

It was all so devastating… But as you pushed the tears back, you remembered the promise that you made to yourself when you first got into a relationship with him; no matter how hard things got, you were gonna love this person as much as you could, for as long as you could… Until the very end, you had to be his pillar of strength and continue cherishing him no matter how much it hurt you in the process.

And you loved him so much, you wouldn’t have it any other way.

“Hey Gin”, you spoke to your phone as you recorded a voice message for her, “I found him, he was at my place. He’s okay, he has a few surface wounds on his arms, most probably nothing to worry about. You can let your boss and the others know that he’s safe and that he’ll stay here for the next couple of hours… And, by the way, thank you for contacting me as soon as you found his phone….Things might’ve been worse, had it not been for you… Call me if you need anything”

As you hit “send”, Akutagawa walked out of the bathroom, wearing an oversized white t-shirt and plaid black and white pajama bottoms, with the towel he used to dry his hair thrown around his neck.

“Feeling more comfortable now?” you asked.

“Yeah”, he responded.

“Good. Now come here, let me see your arms…”

He made his way next to you, letting you investigate his wounds.

“Hmm…”, you said, lost in thought, “they’re not as deep, so you’re not gonna need any stitches… but they do look a bit inflamed… we definitely need to disinfect these”

You took him by the hand back in the bathroom again, where you kept your medical kit. You grabbed the disinfectant bottle and lathered some liquid over a big piece of sterile cotton.

“I gotta warn you sweetie, this might burn a little…”

“Yeah, like I haven’t had worse– OWW!!”, he exclaimed as you pressed it against his wounds.

“I’m sorry, perhaps I wouldn’t have to do this if you hadn’t used your own hands. You were out fighting, who knows how many germs they had…”

“It burns…”, he hissed, clenching his jaw.

“Warned you…”, you responded. “You’ve never used disinfectant before?”

“Do you really think people in the mafia care to use this sh– AUGHH!”, he snarled once again as you repeated the same treatment to his other arm.

“We’re almost done now…” you reassured him as he gave you the most displeased, irritated stare.

“Hmm let’s see…” you mumbled to yourself while searching the contents of your kit, “I don’t have big enough band-aids for this… guess we’ll have to cover them with something else…”

You opened up two bandages, and with a little hesitation, Akutagawa let you wrap them around his arms tightly.

“All patched up!” you said, giving his boney shoulders a light squeeze, “Is there anything I can make for you? Anything to eat? Some tea maybe?”

“No, I think I’m gonna throw up if I do…”

“Yeah, we wouldn’t want that… Okay then, I think we should go to bed and get some rest, no?”

“Yeah…”

After you changed into your pajamas and brushed your teeth, you made your way into the fluffy futon and scooched over for Akutagawa to join you shortly after. While he is generally the quiet type, this time you could tell that he was way too tired even for the short-lived, yet endearing small talk before bed.

“My eyes hurt…” Akutagawa murmured as he slid next to you.

“I know, sweetie…Come here…”, you said, lifting up the cover and inviting him close to you.

Your boyfriend found his way into your arms again, his tired head buried in your chest and his thinned body clinging onto yours, the entirety of his being searching for warmth within your embrace. The comforting motions of your hands caressing his back and the sound of your heartbeat was everything he could ask for at the time.

“Feels like you’ve lost more weight…”, you pointed out as you grazed your fingers over the prominent parts of his skeleton, “Have you been eating well lately?”

“Mm-mm”, he shook his head no after a short pause, as if to adjust his thinking to your own standards of self-preservation. To him, if he made it out alive at the end, what was there to care for?

“Well that’s no good…I’m making you fluffy pancakes and your favorite tea in the morning”, you said knowing that, being starved of affection almost his entire life, he found these simple acts of kindness to be a huge deal. His contentment was clear as day, flowing through you as he pulled himself closer, practically sealing shut whatever space there was between the two of you.

“Thank you…”, he purred against your chest, the mere sweetness of his adorable reaction leading you to plant gentle kisses on the top of his head.

“Anything for you sweetie… I just want you to take care of yourself. Undereating can’t do any good to your condition… And I want to keep you around as much as possible, make as many happy memories together as we can…Like that time when you took me to dinner with the mafia for the first time and Higuchi kept warning me not to hurt your feelings or ‘I’ll be dead’...”

“Tsk, that piss-off…” he mumbled in a mix of displeasure and nostalgia, getting annoyed just by remembering the event, but being strangely happy that he got to experience it with you.

“It made me very happy that you apologized to her…”

“After you told me I was acting just like him, I had no choice…”

“And I’m so proud of you for that, sweetie…” you whispered, running your fingers through his hair

“I still remember when we had Gin and Chuuya over for my birthday and we played that drinking game he had suggested. I’m pretty sure at some point he stopped caring about the rules and started losing on purpose…Ah, what an iconic day…Oh, and that day when I first told you that I loved you…Hahah, you were so awkward whenever I told you that on the phone. It took you a couple of weeks before you were brave enough to say it back to me... But it’s okay, I’m not blaming you, it’s most wise to wait for the time when you are a hundred percent sure that you feel the same way for me… Hey, what about the day of our first date–”

You’d been talking for quite a while now, vocally walking down memory lane, too absent-minded to notice that Akutagawa was fast asleep by then. Your melancholic monologue got softly interrupted by his faint, quiet snores.

“Aww of course. I almost forgot how easily you fall asleep whenever I start rambling like this…”

You slid your hands under his shirt and felt the soft skin on his back. His hold on you was more relaxed, but far from apathetic, as if what remained of his slowly melting tension was love, and only love.

You smiled, feeling infinitely blessed that your boyfriend was there with you, that you were listening to his slow breathing as he was drifting somewhere far away. Your eyelids had been feeling heavy for a while, but before you joined him, you wanted to get some things off your chest; somethings you truly wanted Akutagawa to know, even though you knew that he wouldn’t hear much of it in his sleep.

“Aku, my sweetheart… You are worth so much more than you think. You are enough— no, you’re even more than that… And I wish I had the means to show you just how much you mean to me… Oh, if only I could make you feel even half of my love…”

A/N: Akutagawa cried again in the middle of the night, but didn’t want to bother Y/N with his feelings any further. He removed the bandages because anything that reminded him of Dazai, he couldn’t have on his body. After Y/N found out, she apologised for her ignorance and made him the most delicious fluffy pancakes.

265 notes · View notes

mncxbe · 9 months

Note

Hi please could you write some comfort for aku? i need it after this episode 😭😭

Yes get it I literally bawled my eyes out all evening after watching that episode. Like I knew it was gonna happen but still😭😭 Ok so enjoy♡♡ it's a bit angsty at the beginning but bear with me. it gets better

00:01☆

𝑨𝒌𝒖𝒕𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒘𝒂 𝒙 𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓

𝑮𝒆𝒏𝒓𝒆: comfort♡/ angst

𝑾𝒂𝒓𝒏𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒔: soft Aku

The bruises on Akutagawa's body have already turned purple by the time he got back to the headquarters. But he didn't care about the cuts and marks that now adorned his pale skin, nor about the fact that he almost lost his life in battle; all that mattered was that he came victorious in a fight against one of the most powerful ability users in Yokohama.

Despite the sense of pride he felt as he was leaving the fight scene, anxiety rooted itself in his mind and soul. Because he knew you weren't going to be happy with his current dishevelled state.

But why would he care about your opinion? After all you were... what? A colleague, a friend maybe, someone he occasionally went on missions with? The boundaries of your relationship were not clearly set; even so, Akutagawa knew you cared about him and although he failed to admit it, he cared deeply about you too.

The mafioso could make out your figure under a streetlamp; you were sitting on the stairs in front of the building, hunched over a book. The light of the lamp pole fell upon your frame, enveloping you in a golden mist.

Upon hearing his footsteps your head slowly turned in his direction.

"You're back" you stated in a plain tone as you closed your book and rose to your feet.

"Yea. I just have to write the report and then I'll leave for the night."

Akutagawa cursed himself for how weak his voice sounded. With a blank expression on your face, your eyes scanned his body; lingering on the deep cut on his cheek and the crimson patches on the sleeves of his blouse.

"Everyone left already. You can turn in your report tomorrow, now you're coming to my place"

"But I don't need to-" he tried to protest but you quickly cut him off with a swift motion of your hand.

"You're not in any position to object." you said codly, voice laced with seething anger.

Without waiting for his reply, you hailed a cab and as soon as the yellow car pulled over you yanked the back seat door open and motioned him to get inside.

The ride back to your apartment was marked by a heavy silence. He didn't dare utter a word, opting to spare you quick, fearful glances. It was obvious that you were enraged, but your anger was of a cold nature; the unspoken words stinging like an ice burn.

The tension between the two of you kept growing as you nimbly made your way up the flight of stairs that led to your condo; but as soon as the door shut behind you, your cold facade crumbled.

"You idiot how could you put yourself in danger like that? You could've died." you screamed, throwing your hands up in a desperate gesture.

"Don't worry, ok?" he replied in attempt to ease your mind "All it matters is that I defeted him and-"

"No, Akutagawa it's not just about surviving fights. You need to be more careful. Why do you even accept such dangerous missions?"

"You don't get it, Y/N. These are all trials. If I manage to triumph over the enemy Dazai will surely deem me worthy. My life won't be lived in vain."

Although he spoke those words in the most gentle voice possible, the truth behind them shattered your heart. Pearly tears began to cloud your vision as you spoke in a harsh voice.

"Did it ever occur to you that maybe Dazai is just using you? You're putting your life on the line for someone who doesn't even care about you. And your reckless actions don't only affect you, you know?" By this point your whole body was trembling but your fierce gaze still held his as you continued talking:

"They affect the people who actually care about you. You're hurting us, Ryu. You're hurting me."

Akutagawa wasn't an affectionate person; you knew that very well. That's why the moment you felt his arms wrap tightly around you, your body froze.

"Shhh" he said in a hushed voice, gently caressing your back "I'm here now, so don't cry."

Akutagawa himself was surprised by his soft-hearted behaviour. Normally when people spoke badly about his former mentor he'd lash out, but when you said those things all he felt was... guilt? Pressing you closer to his chest, he held you until you managed to regain your breath.

When you eventually pulled away, his dark coat was stained with your tears. You wiped your running nose with the back of your hand, earning the smile from your colleague.

"Look, Y/N" he began gingerly, taking one of your soft hands in his "All I can do well is fight. I was born and raised a weapon and this is what I love doing, it's my purpose in life. You cannot ask me to give up on that."

His gaze softened as he heard your breath hitch again. Giving your hand a reassuring squeeze, he continued talking.

"But for the first time in my life I'm driven not only by the need to prove myself to Dazai. I fight for you too. And so no matter what, I'll come back to you. I swear."

A soft smile rose to your lips upon hearing his confession, your eyes glimmering with hope.

"You promise, Ryu?" you asked in a mellow voice as you took a step towards him; he was now mere inches away from you.

Suddenly, Akutagawa became aware of the closeness between your bodies and attempted to retreat, but your arms hurriedly snaked around his neck to keep him in place. As your gaze traced along the fine features of his face you could see his cheeks turn a dark shade of pink.

"Are you perhaps blushing, Ryu?" you giggled, playfully raising a brow.

Your friend shifted closer to you; his lithe fingers digging into the plush of your hips as he pressed your frame flush against his. His sudden, daring actions caused a blush to spread across your face too.

"Who's blushing now, huh?" he huffed, bringing his lips close impossibly close to the shell of your ear. "And not to mention that you got so worked up about me dying that you cried. So don't start teasing me when you're no better. Ok dear?"

As he uttered those words in his usual, low voice a wave of heat washed over your body and you shuddered lightly. Your reaction didn't go unnoticed, his lips curling into a smirk.

"You look pretty when you're flustered" he babbled out before meeting your gaze again. "But really now, I hope you know I meant every word I said to you. And I know that may not be enough to ease your mind. After all actions speak louder than words, so I'll prove you"

"You don't have to prove me anything, Ryu" you replied in a reassuring tone "Just keep your promise, ok? And let me patch you up, you look terrible"

With a warm smile on his face, Akutagawa leaned slightly forward, his forehead pressing against yours; a pledge of devotion to you.

"Okay. But let's stay like this a bit longer" he whispered as he closed his eyes, relishing your presence and the brand new feeling that was blooming in his heart.

#bsd #bungou stray dogs #bsd x reader #bsd fluff #akutagawa x reader #akutagawa #bsd akutagawa #bungo stray dogs akutagawa #fluff #bsd comfort

219 notes · View notes

poeticlilies · 1 year

Note

okay, first of all i want to say that i love the way you write💞 you said that you would try writing something platonic so can you write something for akutagawa and executive!reader who is chuuya’s s/o? They have a similar personality to dazai’s and used to be closed friends with him back when he was in the pm; so just something where akutagawa and reader are sent on a mission and he messes it up to the point he gets severely injured and reader has to fix the situation and afterwards he expects them to snap at him or something but they just take care of him and reassure him that everything is okay :(

okay i didn’t expect this to get so long and specific😭 ofc you can change whatever you don’t like if you even choose to write something like this🫶🏻

♡ Accidents happen!

Akutagawa Ryuunosuke x Reader (Platonic) , Mentions of Nakahara Chuuya x Reader (Romantic)

Desc: You comfort Akutagawa after he fucks up a mission. (gender neutral reader)

TW/CW: dark themes, bad thoughts, severe injuries, mentions of hospitals/surgery/treatment, fight scenes

He fucked up.

He fucked up, bad.

And he knew it; from the large slash across his chest to the fatigue settled deep into his bones, he knew that he had messed up big time.

But there you were; ever so casual, laughing merrily as you hauled his ass back to an escape vehicle, waving cheerily and telling him you'd handle it.

Though there was no ill intention in your words, Akutagawa couldn't help but try to swallow the rising pit of fear bubbling in his chest, crawling up his throat and choking him. Though there was no ill intention in your eyes, he never knew, because he didn't meet them once after he had gotten careless and suffered as a result.

He had been cornered; stuck between a rock and a hard place. The files the mafia needed were right there, and so he gambled his chances and lunged forward, hand outstretched, desperately trying to grasp the documents.

However, the damned newbie, the one the Port Mafia didn't have any information on yet, somehow managed to blow the sheets of paper away, pearly white fluttering against the wind before being torn to shreds by oncoming bullets.

He had frozen, in shock; still processing the situation even as the group recovered and launched a counterattack. And though his Rashomon acted on it's own, it still wasn't as efficient without it's master's command, like a piece of technology being given instructions but not how to carry them out.

He felt it, felt it as it dug into his chest; how it burned on his skin like fire and how it had woken him from his slumber. Eliminating everyone else was easy; he was made for this, was born for it, it came naturally like breathing. However, there was no way to recover the lost documents, and as more and more swarms of men came running (where did they even come from?) Akutagawa Ryuunosuke simply stood there, bitterness filling his throat as the wound slowly stained his shirt crimson.

It was then that you had arrived; yelling (or rather, screaming) his name and tackling him just as an onslaught of bullets whizzed by where the two of you where moments before.

Every other detail was a blur; all he remembered were flashes of it, little pieces that he tried to stitch together, but couldn't. Eventually, he gave up; and in the back of the black Port Mafia vehicle, he closed his eyes and allowed himself to fade away into unconsciousness.

He woke up, however. Everyone has to wake up at some point, except for when you're dead.

You were by his bedside, talking to another executive; words swam around in his head before he finally grasped the name of the orange-haired male who stood beside you. Nakahara Chuuya, he thought. That's right.

You were chatting with him, recalling details of your (failed) mission. Though the events and details you recounted were gruesome, you still had that grin on your face as you recounted details and made little jokes.

For a second, your figure was replaced with Dazai's, his ex-mentor; and he immediately panicked.

Scrambling up, he saluted you with shaking hands despite the pain that flared up in his chest. Heaving, he choked out apologies for failing the mission, for being careless, for gambling it all and losing, as images of Dazai flashed through his head.

You startled, surprised, before pushing him (gently) back into bed. Hushing him when he looked at you, shocked that it was you, and not Dazai; telling him it was okay as Chuuya watched in concern for his subordinate.

You told Chuuya to leave the room, bidding him farewell with a kiss to the cheek and a smile. He complied, waving goodbye and looking at Akutagawa for the last time (with pity? or concern? or scorn?) before disappearing into the hallway.

Akutagawa shook like a leaf in the wind; terrified of what was next.

He expected you to shout, to yell, to scream; to hit him and berate him and cruelly punishing him. That's surely why you had sent Nakahara-san out.

So, instead, when he was met with your gentle embrace and the warm comfort of your reassurances, he froze up again like he did some hours prior. Stunned that he wasn't being yelled at, kicked at, for messing up the mission.

He opened his mouth to talk, but all that came out was a soft gasp; his hands acted of their own accord as they curled into your shirt, grasping tightly and burying themselves into the fabric as he gently rested his head against your shoulder.

"Shh.. it's okay..." you had told him. "It's alright, we can fix it.. it's not a big deal, it's okay..."

Those words were so foreign, so strange, he had to take a moment to comprehend them; chest rising and falling as tears clouded his vision. It was okay? He was being forgiven for failing the mission?

Even as he began to softly cry, latching on to your figure and refusing to let go, you comforted him; murmuring reassurances as you held him, in the hospital wing of the mafia building; the only sound other than his crying the soft beeps and whirrs of the machines next to the bed.

Eventually, he tired himself out; tears stopping like a river's flow in the summertime, slowly ebbing away until there was nothing left except his uneven breaths and sounds of the medical equipment next to him.

He was so, so tired; and you were so, so comfortable; and though he fought it, he could not help but sample the sweet taste of rest as the sensation of sleep lulled him into a tranquil state. You slowly rested his upper body against the mattress, gently adjusting the covers as he closed his eyes.

"It's okay. Just go to sleep." you said; and he listened. Followed your advice as you gently soothed him to sleep, hand smoothing out the knots in his hair as you sat by his bedside, keeping watch over him.

And as he was slowly pulled into dreamland, he curled up against your body, knowing it would be alright. That you were here, now, and that you would fix this.

Akutagawa Ryuunosuke fucked up a mission;

but it wasn't the end of the world. It was okay. You would be there to catch him if he fell, like you did today.

eugh,, so tired. this is so bad. i'm sorry for the quality.

#akutagawa x you #ryunosuke akutagawa #akutagawa ryuunosuke #akutagawa x reader #bsd aktugawa #bungo stray dogs #bungo stray dogs akutagawa #bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #bsd comfort

473 notes · View notes