#actually most Stephen King stories

[mejomonster]

Reminding myself at least im not writing a story about a 30-40 year old guy still hung up over a lost lover he varely knew/ex wife/missing wife who he idolizes to the point she's an object barely a person and when she is a person it clashes with the ideal hes longing for, and he thinks hes this rebel poor guy but hes got mega cash and can afford an LA/San Francisco/New York home AND a vacation because hes Got vacation time(?) Or just so money secure he can afford 1+ months not working, oh and he's probably a self employed artist who "has no ideas" and is lamenting it even though hes got enough money to indulge his trip to the Weird Scary Rural place so clearly the situation isnt dire. Oh and he has a drinking problem. He doesnt know whats real or not, but since hes alread deluding himself about his Imaginary Idolized Woman and Pretending Hes Poor... who can really say if hes seeing any scary wild shit at all or hes just dramaticizing the mundane (or lying)

At least im not writing a guy like that

#rant #dhdhfh okay look. i like House of Leaves. in fact i love the concept i love experimental rule breaking shit #but ive found this EXACT character mold in like 5 horror stories!!!!! #its practicallh EXPECTED im shocked when its not a 30-40 year old rich man thinking hes a poor loner hung up on a woman whos Not actually #in the story much. #i prefer my horror protagonists to be lesbians thanks #anyway at least. in the stories i write my protagonists are a plethora of bisexual dorks to suave dangers #but none are like. This. #im just a bit sick of the mold? it reeks of guy Author Self Insert #and whike thats fine. its fine to do. its like do yalk ALL have these same problems??? i hope not #i hope ur just using the same trope due to the references and synbolism of This Trope by this point #like. at least in the case of alan wake im like. i Know its a stephen king reference #in IT like... okay bill clearly fits this bill. but he has to MEET beverly so shes not an offscreen presence so much as a pedestal that #is forcibly confronted. at leasyly #and house of leaves i HOPE picked yhe trope to reference other horrors. so far its the least creative #most basic bitch thing about tbe novel

[thebibliosphere]

I both believe "poor people deserve art" and "artists deserve food", but it's hard to reconcile those beliefs. I blame capitalism. And I suppose it mostly matters who you're stealing from?

I don't mean to question you at all, I'm against people pirating your stories. I guess I was just wondering if you had more thoughts regarding the reconciliation the two beliefs I quoted above.

I think the reconciliation is working toward a future where things are better, and authors and artists don't have to beg people not to steal from them because they think every author is Stephen King, who wouldn't notice if you stole the pennies found under his couch when in reality most of us are hunting for spare change down the back of the couch because we are earning below minimum wage.

We need people to embrace the idea that art belongs to the working class, both in terms of consumption but also creation.

If you don't support the working-class creators, you'll only end up with rich fucks with no scope of the world beyond their own narrow view of privilege.

Indie creators are actually working very hard to change the way the industry works, and the publishing industry is shitting itself over it. They don't like the success some of us are having. It's why they keep upping prices while slashing corners on their own production (while never affecting the man at the top) to try and stay competitive within the rat race they've created.

They're not interested in the proliferation of art. They're not interested in making sure their authors can afford to live. They don't want more diversity. They don't want inclusion. They want profit at whatever the cost.

And while indie creators very much need to get paid because we live in a capitalistic society and everything is burning down around us, and a carton of eggs now costs more than what I earn per hour, our creativity is directly at odds with the type of profiteering big publishers want.

The money should go to the writers. Not the CEOs. The money should go to the workers in the print houses. Not the CEOs. No one needs the kind of wealth these people have. It's obscene. We need direct action against these conglomerates. We need unionization. We need a means to fight back so that we can make art and make it accessible.

So, how do we do that? I don't know. I'm just a very tired, disabled creator doing my best to keep my head above water. But I think getting people to realize that art and books are worth saving up for would be a good start.

That putting money in the pockets of creators is just as important as your own enjoyment of their art. Because if there aren't any artists, you've got nothing.

Getting them involved with their local libraries would also be a great start. Educating them on how the industry works is part of that. The number of people telling me they had no idea libraries paid authors is staggering. And that's intentional. It's a by-product of right-wing propaganda to make you think libraries are worthless and just sap taxpayers' money.

They're not.

If they were, the fash wouldn't be trying so hard to take them away.

Basically, we need working-class solidarity and for certain people on the left to rid themselves of the idea that just because something isn't borne of manual labor, it doesn't have worth. We need the artists and the dreamers as much as we need to bricklayers and the craftsmen. Otherwise, what's the fucking point of it all?

#sorry #this isn't an actionable answer to your question #I don't know what that answer is #I just need people to realize art is not the exclusive creation of the wealthy #and treating it as such is making everything worse

[flanaganfilm]

Is there any one thing that you've written/directed that scares you more than anything else you've created? Or perhaps something you've created that you thought was so scary it shouldn't be made public and you cut it?

The scene that scared me the most in my career was the baseball boy sequence of DOCTOR SLEEP. I knew the story needed the scene, it was an essential moment, and I was following the blueprint that Stephen King had laid out in the novel, but still... I'd thought we could sidestep a lot of the trauma by filming around the actual violence. I figured keeping all of it off screen and only focusing on a closeup of Jacob's face would help soften the impact, but Jacob delivered such a realistic and heartbreaking performance that the scene felt even more brutal than I'd thought it would be. (I always try to mention here - Jacob was absolutely fine. He had prepared the performance with his father in the weeks leading up to the shoot, and he hopped up off the ground after the first take with a big grin on his face. He knew he'd leveled all of us, he high-fived his dad and sauntered over to the craft service table while we stood there speechless and with tears in our eyes.) That scene affected all of us very deeply, and it remains the scariest thing I've ever filmed. I cut it back several times in the edit, and even that didn't do anything to dull the impact. When I showed the film to Stephen King, he said "I love the movie... but that baseball boy scene is a bit much though" and I didn't know what to say besides "... you wrote it!" I'm glad it's in the movie, and it is an essential part of that story - but man, that is tough to watch. My wife still hasn't seen all of it. During early test screenings, she'd leave the room before it started playing. I find myself looking away from it, even to this day.

#doctor sleep

[littlemissayu]

Wht Songs Would Play in Your Rom-Com? Pt2

A/N: Hey Loves!! I'm posting pt2, surprisingly I actually posted on the day I scheduled myself to post so that's great!! I hope you enjoy pt2 and it is as good as pt1. And PLEASE leave some feedback it is very helpful!!

pt1

Parings: Pomefiore, Idia Shorud, Diasomnia x reader(seperate/romantic)

Love Grows(Where My Rosemary Goes) by Edison Lighthouse

If you read the lyrics or have listened to the song this is obviously the song that plays as he slowly falls for you. This also most likely opposites attract kind of trope. Js imagine how cute it would be to see Vil fall hard for someone who is almost nothing like him and as much as some of the things you do he may prefer to stay far away from, still he’ll think it's cute because it’s you.

Sincerely Yours by Zenglen

If you have seen some of my prior content you might recognize this song as the inspiration for on of my post. Now part of this may be my haitian culture influencing my opinion but cmon, you can’t see Rook and his love dancing in the living room, yk like that first time moving in kinda of dance when you two are just super sickly in love.(that or Until I Found You by Stephen Sanchez)

Late Night Talking by Harry Styles

I might be reaching but just think about the possibility of you guys having your “thing” be just staying up late talking to each other despite how sleepy you are. And maybe you two work out your conflict by one of you coming over at night to talk out your problem together js like all the other times you guys have random conversations to the point its js a normal thin gyou teo do.

Video Game Lover by Narraws Music

Now this feels a bit{a lot} on the nose BUT your telling me you don’t wanna see Idia’s rom-com becoming good friends with you through a common game you two play but rarely talk to each other irl, not even knowing who the person is behind the screen. You guys just vent to each other through the chat an you guys are just binding til you say something ridiculously familiar and so he recognizes you from that and he’s too nervous to approach you irl, how the issue is solved is all up to you my loves. 

Can’t Help Falling In Love by Elivs Presely

This is obviously a human-fae love between you two. Are you kidding me, that title is “Cant help falling in love” hinting at the complexity of your relationship as a human lifespan is considerably shorter than a fae’s so he’ll have to live a large chunk of his life without you. Not to mention that Malleus is bound to be king of Briar Valley which the faeries of Briar Valley may not be too overjoyed at the fact their king is with a human.

But you two just cant help but fall for each other and this song plays as you two are out dancing together in the dark, relishing the relationship that you two might not be able to have for long.

Viva La Vida by Coldplay

Despite this not being a love song it is pretty similar to Lilia’s story and so just imagine this playing during like your first truly swoon worthy kiss. But not only during the kiss, the instrumental can lightly play in the background in either the learning of his backstory OR during that first moment you meet. Maybe even when he first falls in love with you.

Bam Bam by Camilla Cabello and Ed Sheeran

Fell first(you) and fell harder(Silver). You fell first obviously bc he’s constantly asleep so it’d make more sense for you to fall first. And when you fall for him you begin to do things to help him out, some are smaller things like adjusting his head so his neck doesn’t hurt or bigger things like putting a pillow beneath his head(wheter thats one of your body parts or an actually pillow is up to you). Those little things add up and he notices and slowly you creep into his thoughts and dreams and now one of the only things he sees in his sleep is you. Convinced that its one of those tropes where you say you love him while you think he’s asleep and you think he doesn’t hear and he doesnt like you back, but he just hasn’t been able to find a way to tell you as their are many plot thrown in issues that get in his way.

That’s How You Know by Amy Adams

I’m very well aware this is another Disney song BUT, think about Sebek with a stereotypical Disney Princess who just belts into song whenever, and she’s not really singing to him but giving other guys advice on how to treat their loves and he just ends up finding himself admiring the fact your giving these random guys advice all the while not realizing that the seeds of his love for you were being sewed.

A/N: Well I finally got pt2 out!! Lmk your thought and opinions not only on this post(+the last one) but some other things that are similar(other ideas for post). Ik i haven’t responded to anything in my inbox in a while but i promise I’ll do my best to get to them I js have many other things on my plate as well

Pomefiore Masterlist

Ignihyde Masterlist

Diasomnia Masterlist

TWST Masterlist

Grand Masterlist

#twisted wonderland #twst #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #fluff #vil schoenheit x reader #rook hunt x reader #epel felmier x reader #idia shroud x reader #malleus draconia x reader #lilia vanrouge x reader #silver x reader #sebek zigvolt x reader

[shenqingqiustanaccount]

/r/relationships

My (32m) husband (30m) keeps saying he isnt gay. We've been married for five years. Help?

We met when i was working as a freelance writer. He was one of my regular readers, and he hated my writing so much that he paid me to move in with him (dont ask, it's complicated) so that he can edit my stuff. To his credit my work has gotten a lot better since then, but that also might have had to do with regular food & the lack of rent. Anyway we started making out like 3 months in. things clearly escalated and now we're married and we have 2 cats.

For like a year after I moved in he kept on saying that he was straight. Since we were having sex I kind of thought he was joking? Or that he at least stopped thinking he was straight when he introduced me as his partner to his family. He stopped bringing it up at some point anyway, and i figured it didnt matter after we got married. Only recently i brought up how he used to think he's straight and he told me HE STILL IS. How the fuck does that make any sense? Who can be straight after nearly 10 years of monogamous dicking?? I've never even heard him call a woman attractive!!! He is CONSTANTLY telling me about some new hot dudes he's seen!!

How do I convince my husband that he's probably not straight?

Edit: stop calling me fake i WISH i were joking but he is very serious about this. i asked if he thought i was attractive, and he said of course he does. i thought that was a "gotcha" moment but he said that because the protagonist of my novel is a self-insert, and that i described him as the most attractive man ever, my husband would obviously be attracted to me? because of novel protagonist logic?? i literally do not understand

Edit 2: Okay, i've tried some of the (ACTUAL) suggestions people left. I printed out pictures of "hot" people, men and women, and asked him to sort into a Hot and Not Hot pile. Most of the men were deemed Attractive and all the women (+some men) were deemed Not. i asked him what that means. i can't remember his exact logic but i think it boils down to the fact that he thinks all of his opinions are actually objective fact. i guess it's nice that he thinks I'm objectively hot. i spoke with his siblings, they all agree that he's absolutely gay, and they talked to him individually but he's still telling me he's straight.

Edit 3: i was going to ignore all those comments but you ASSHOLES won't leave it alone. YES, WE MET BECAUSE I WAS A NOVELIST AND HE HATED MY BOOK. He was NOT normal about it. i don't know what else to tell you. He's a closeted rich kid (as some of you had guessed already) and i guess he just yearned for the touch of a man so hard that i had to marry him. Whatever. it was our anniversary yesterday and he said "no homo" when he gave me flowers because i guess i was too insistent about him being gay. he was kind of joking but definitely not entirely.

Edit 4: some of you have guessed my pen name?? how??? A few others have even guessed my husband's username. Absolutely insane. I didnt even give that much info. He still says he's straight btw. Honestly i've kind of given up on changing his mind, but i did direct him to some queer websites a couple people suggested, so maybe reading more about internalized homophobia will cure him? It's actually stopped being funny and now I'm worried for his mental health, so I'm really hoping that personal stories he can actually relate to might do something.

Edit ??: you've fucking done it guys. he found this post. my sweet darling husband yelled at me for 5 minutes. those websites must've worked though, because he can easily go on for 20 minutes if he actually cared, and all the replies people left maybe helped a bit too. he actually apologized to me at the end!! can you believe that??? if you want to see him in all his glory he's the jerk with all the awards and upvotes in the comments here. you will definitely recognize him for a stephen king antagonist when you see him.

Edit 6: our cats are named Crybaby and Little Fucker 😊

#svsss #shang qinghua #cumplane #dont talk to me about reddit im scared of reddit #i only vaguely know how the posts are formatted #fanfiction #<-recently added since more than one person asked if this was real #sorry folks 🙏 it is not real

[bitterkarella]

Midnight Pals: Fuckenstein

Guillermo del Toro: submitted for the approval of the midnight society, I call this the tale of Frankenstein del Toro: but what if Frankenstein was hot Stephen King: do you mean the doctor or the monster King: because, technically, the monster is frankenstein’s monster and del Toro: I know what I said, steve

Del Toro: in this retelling, the doctor is played by Oscar isaacs del Toro: and the monster is played by Andrew Garfield Barker: do they fuck Poe: clive Barker: no really Barker: I think in this situation Barker: this is a good question King: yeah actually he has a point

Mary Shelley: sup fuckers del Toro: I was just talking about my Frankenstein adaptation with Oscar isaacs and Andrew Garfield Shelley: do they fuck? Barker: see? That’s what I was asking!

Del Toro: “do they fuck” del Toro: what a question! del Toro: would I, Guillermo del toro, cinema’s most notorious monster fucker, make a film where monsters fuck! del Toro: it’s like none of you even saw the shape of water King: oh what happens in that? del Toro: del Toro: they fuck King: wait do they really King: on screen? del Toro: hardcore X-rated swim bladder action

Bram Stoker: oh GREAT now you’re gonna ruin Frankenstein! Stoker: it’s bad enough that they made Dracula horny Stoker: now they’re gonna back Frankenstein horny! Stoker: so gross Stoker: bleh! Stoker: why do you guys always have to make everything so sexual Stoker: it was better when Frankenstein was a big green thing with, like, the weird head Stoker: man, there was NO way yo could get horny looking at that Stoker: so totally good and unsexy Stoker: now that’s the way to do it Mary Shelley: shut up

Mary Shelley: so they fuck right del Toro: of course they fuck Shelley: I got a great scene for ya Guillermo Shelley: what if they fuck on the monster’s mother’s grave del Toro: del Toro: um the monster doesn’t really Shelly: [flipping switchblade] who’s writing this story, nerd?

#midnight pals #midnight society #the midnight society #guillermo del toro #mary shelley #bram stoker #stephen king #clive barker #edgar allan poe

[copperbadge]

Supposedly, people with Anphantasia don't get scared reading scary stories, or at least not much. Is that true with you if you ever read Horror?

You know, I'd never thought about it, but I suppose it is. To an extent, anyway.

Follows a discussion of my relationship to horror prose and media; if you don't know what aphantasia is, as many people coming to this tumblr don't, I have a tag for it here that may help -- it's basically the lack of a "mind's eye", a visual imagination, so I hear/read things and don't see an image of them in my mind. If you are scoffing right now that nobody actually has a mind's eye, congratulations, you may also have aphantasia. The articles linked in the tag will be useful to you.

I have definitely been scared by prose before but it's very rare, and not much since I was a child, when the stories I found scary were preying on fears I already had. I loved the Scary Stories To Tell In The Dark books, and I think it's not unusual that I found the illustrations more frightening than the prose, but the only story that ever scared me was the one about the vampire who kept trying to grab a kid through a window -- because I had a window over my bed in my childhood bedroom and I was terrified I'd look up to see someone looking down at me through it. Likewise, as an adult, the only content in horror I find scary is what I think of as "mind horror" -- the loss of faculty or the loss of awareness of faculty (think the end scene of the novel Hannibal with the brain). Which is one of my biggest fears.

I don't read much horror because generally I get bored, which has in the past made me feel faintly appalled at myself, but which now makes more sense. Certainly I have no interest in slasher-style gore in prose, because I find it uninteresting and it goes on a really long time, while I don't watch it in movies/TV because the visual is upsetting -- so if I was getting the visual from the prose I might react more emotionally. I am a fan of Stephen King but mostly his early work where he was shorter on suspense, and I was reading it because I liked the ideas and the characters. Carrie is super interesting because of the personalities involved, not because of the violence or the horror aspects. But I've never seen a movie adaptation and I can imagine I would be deeply unsettled if not distraught by certain scenes if depicted visually. Although I didn't find the Hannibal TV series super upsetting (I mostly was put off by how bad I imagined Will smelled) so perhaps body horror just doesn't do it for me.

This may also explain my hard-no on zombie media, because I'm not scared at all of zombies, I just find them boring and gross, and that leaves the post-apocalyptic humans. My hard-no on post-apocalypse anything is an aversion to imagining the end of my world, though, which isn't visual, it's conceptual, and not scary, just upsetting.

Like, people kept suggesting Zombies Run! to me when I was taking up running and -- well, one, I needed the music to keep my pace, I didn't want it interrupted. But two, I didn't see why a bunch of random groaning noises would make me run faster. If you could see zombies chasing you in your head, yeah, that'd probably be more motivating.

It kind of explains too why I haven't written much horror. I used to be very curious about how people worked out what's "scary" in horror prose and I guess part of the curiosity came from not experiencing it myself. It's tough to know how to write a scary story when stories don't scare you.

To be clear, I definitely experience fear. Reading Stephen King's "It" didn't really scare me, but there were scary moments in the film adaptations. I startle at jumpscares. There's plenty of stuff in real life that I'm scared of. And even podcasts -- I don't get mental images during podcasts like apparently most people do, but Magnus Archives got me with the "digging into your pre-existing fears" thing once or twice, and while I didn't finish The Left Right Game (I just got bored) the hitchhiker scene definitely got me. But I think, unless it's playing on something conceptual that already existed, yeah, I don't find prose particularly frightening.

Huh. This feels like the kind of thing that could have a significant impact on my creative output if I could crowbar my way into it. Knowing that I as an aphantic don't need descriptions that other people do has already, I think, impacted my editing process, but this feels like it maybe would somehow have an effect on the whole thing -- the fact that I don't experience emotions when reading in the same way other people do because I don't get the visuals is something to meditate on.

How the fuck did I ever even become a writer. Like what's up with that.

(Ironically it was X-Files fanfic. X-Files, a show that very much did scare me, for which I wrote and read a lot of fanfic, none of which did...yikes. Well, that's something to meditate on for the weekend.)

#sam has adhd #an aphantasia fantasia

[onlycosmere]

What book sequel are you STILL waiting for? 

marsh642: It's been weeks since Brandon Sanderson released a book. I hope he's doing ok /s

PattableGreeb: One day I hope to be like that guy output-wise. Not necessarily in terms of volume, but like, the sheer ability to just get into it and commit without much fuss.

erossthescienceboss: I’m a writer, and deeply envy his ability to work within a schedule and use his time. Has he ever experienced writers’ block? At all? Like, I’m in nonfiction — I don’t even do creative writing! Yet so often, it’s like pulling teeth.

Bird by Bird by Anne Lamott is a great book for those of us prone to writers’ block and procrastination (I related to Anne’s writing struggles deeply, and often wonder if she has undiagnosed ADHD) but I’d love to read a Sanderson guide to Actually Writing and Getting Shit Done.

Brandon Sanderson: I'd say that what you do, in nonfiction, is a different beast than what I do. I find nonfiction like pulling teeth too, sometimes!

Of course, fiction can be like that too. I do experience writer's block, but I am fortunate in several ways. One is that I managed to build a very good work ethic during my unpublished years, one I was mostly able to maintain after going professional. I also found a multitude of strategies for dealing with writer's block that have been helpful.

Once in a while, a book just doesn't work, though, and I DO abandon it and get into a funk for a while.

Simple guide for me is:

1) Make manageable goals.

2) Write consistently, and develop habits. Long hours are not as good as consistent hours. Crunching on a book burns you out. Instead, I follow the Stephen King method of shooting for around 2k words a day.

3) If I get into a funk, write anyway, planning to throw those words away. Then re-read them the next day and see if they are actually terrible, or if I was in a funk. Most common result if the words are bad is this: writing them gives my brain something to fix, and it does, giving me a new scene to try. But if I just stop, and don't write the bad words, I get stuck.

4) In emergencies, having something fun and different to work on can give a breather. This is where the Secret Projects came from.

Good luck! Don't know if that helps, but I hope it's at least interesting.

xXCoffeeCreamerXx: Step 2 is where I get caught up. I know I need to build good habits, but I simply can’t get started/stay consistent enough to form those habits. So is there a tip 1.25, 1.5, 1.75?

Brandon Sanderson: There is, but it's unfortunately not going to be quite as useful. That's the step that is most likely to be the tough one, but diagnosing what is causing it is a little like trying to diagnose a disease from a headache. Basically anything can cause you to have trouble building the habits, and so general advice is tougher to give. The solution will really depend on your personal psychology.

How have you built other habits? What motivates you? (Loaded question, I know.) An easy trick is to put your writing time just before or after something you do every week already, and don't have trouble remembering to do. Have a weekly raid with the WoW team? Add writing in before it for two hours. Go to the gym on a Saturday? Build a playlist of mood music for your story, imagine it while there, then stop at a library/cafe always on the way home and write for a few hours as part of the weekly routine.

Involving others in your life can help. Telling them your goals, and getting their buy-in to make you responsible. Starting/joining a writing group (which isn't for everyone, mind you, but works for some of us) so you have a responsibility to submit can work too, depending on if you're the type who will fill bad not having something to share each week after you promised to do so.

Like the cafe suggestion above, a lot of people have more success building a habit if it's something they go out and do--rather than something they do at home, particularly if you're trying to write in a space where you ordinarily relax.

But really, there's a WHOLE lot going on inside of us in regards to motivation, and the individual brain brew is unique to us all. I am helped by keeping a spreadsheet of work done, so I can watch the numbers count up and see my progress. Others I know need a stick or a carrot. Others work on a yearly habit (writing during the summers as a teacher, for example) rather than a weekly one.

And all of that is assuming you're not avoiding writing for other reasons, such as performance anxiety, fear of the blank page, or a sense that something's wrong with your story you don't know how to fix.

Best of luck. Like I said, the advice here might not be as good/relevant as either of us would like. But maybe there's something in it you can take away.

#writing advice #long post #brandon sanderson #cfsbf #root #branderson

[olderthannetfic]

New favorite pastime: telling people who say that I must have gone through trauma in order to write dark things well that I don't think they're old enough to read my story, as discerning reality from make-believe is something most children do very early on, then recommending they have their grown-up install a net nanny program on the computer to keep them from ending up seeing something that might distress them. Then, when they insist no, they were complimenting me, actually, telling them that Stephen King committed zero murders, etc, etc., for as long as I can think of authors' names and examples. Repeat copying & pasting that last comment for all subsequent interactions.

I can already hear people going, "just block them!" but I like making the people who make my day worse feel bad, and this is a way to do that. When I think I'm about to get an actual comment on my work and instead it's someone going, "I'm so fucking stupid and braindead that I assume you have to do something in order to write it because the whole concept of 'fiction' is lost on my dumb ass", it annoys me, and I'm tired of being expected to be a mom who gently goes, "oh, I'm sure they meant well!" I much prefer being the snide, bitter old witch who goes, "wow, you're a moron" and doesn't coddle them.

I get it. A lot of people are stupid enough they, personally, could not write a thing they didn't experience. "Write what you know" exists because people that dumb are so common. But their empty skulls aren't universal and I'm tired of pretending there's anything rational or logical about assuming my stories are autobiographical.

Why do people like this even bother commenting? A video of them taking a shit would have just as much intellectual insight to add to the conversation, and I could at least sell that online to a niche porn site for money.

--

[lunellasflo]

My Revision of Wish

As someone who loves the concept of Wish, I thought it was a decent addition to the Disney Animation Canon. I enjoyed the songs, the gorgeous hybrid artstyle, and the homage to Sleeping Beauty's wide cinemascope aspect. Unfortunately, the more I think about Wish, the more disappointed I was with the final product. For what was supposed to be a celebration of Disney's legacy, it ended up being shot with the blandification ray by the studio itself, because they had a lot of interesting concepts planned for the film. It's just impossible for me to hate Wish like everyone else on the internet, because I know there's passion behind this idea, it was just muddled and screwed over by the despicable corporate side of Disney.

Now, while I did love the final product and was also simultaneously disappointed over what it could’ve and should’ve been, I wanted to showcase my version of the film with a heavier emphasis on the wishing star’s untold origin story. This is actually an updated/edited version of my original draft, and I added a little bit of characterization as well.

SPOILERS FOR THE ACTUAL FILM BTW

Wish (in my version) is fully 2D-Animated, and contains music, orchestration and lyrics from Alan Menken and Stephen Schwartz, with additional output from Julia Michaels.

Cast:

Alycia Pascual-Peña as Asha

Chris Pine as King Magnifico

Amara Le Negra as Queen Amaya

Roman Banks as Orion (Star)

Summary: 

“Have you ever wondered how the legendary Wishing Star was born?… Set in a time centuries before Snow White wished by the wishing well, or Geppetto wished for his little wooden puppet to become a real boy, Wish takes place in the medieval city of Rosas, a fantasy kingdom off the coast of the Mediterranean Sea where your wishes can literally be transformed into reality. The kingdom is ruled by King Magnifico (Chris Pine) and Queen Amaya (Amara Le Negra), respected by all as the kingdom’s sole wish-granters. They live happily in peace with their royal daughter named Asha (voiced by Alycia Pascual Peña), who was set to take her parents’ throne once she turned 17. 

Princess Asha is sharp-witted and wildly smart beyond her years: a young philosopher in the making, who believes that the stars are always there to guide her. She's a shy bookworm who is very creative, she draws animations in her notepad and paints with watercolors all over her bedroom, much like Rapunzel. Asha also wants to be a musician and to inspire the people with her music. While being devoted to her goal to ensure that everyone gets their wish to come true, Asha also struggles with poor leadership skills, and she doesn't know how to be a good leader to her friends, or her kingdom. Her parents seem to make it look easy, and sometimes Asha prefers to rely on them to make her dreams come true. However, Asha believes that a bigger and stronger wish requires a much more difficult journey, and in order to achieve her wish, she must confront her own parents, two of the fiercest and most powerful villains the Disney universe has ever known.

King Magnifico is almost the same as his canon depiction, except he has no backstory of him losing his family to destruction which would've make him more sympathetic, and does not mesh well with him being a villain. He uses his magic to remove wishes from people's hearts and keeps them in his own "wish orbs" for personal keeping, but we don't find out what he does with them until the first act. Before he praticed magic, he was a philosopher who believed in the power of the stars in the night sky, inspiring Asha to develop her belief that there is magic in the stars.

Queen Amaya is a female villain who is madly in love with Magnifico and pressures Asha to be a perfect royal daughter, much in the vein of Yzma and Maleficent, with shades of Mother Gothel. She is a black dark-skinned Latina, and Asha's birth mother. Queen Amaya owns has a pet cat assistant named Cleo, who is a callback to Maleficent's crow Diablo, or Lady Tremaine's cat Lucifer.

Alright, now back to the story!

On her 17th birthday, during a beautiful royal ball, Asha notices that her parents have wondered off from their thrones, and she uncovers a dark truth about both of her parents and how they want to keep the wishes of the people for themselves. Even worse, she peaks through the cracked door of the throne room to witness that the King and Queen are crushing the people's wishes, and infusing their energy, in order to make their own magic more powerful, and thus manipulating the townspeople and giving them the false hope of their wishes being granted. Asha tries to keep what she saw a secret from her parents, but she argues that the wishes must be free and sent back to the people. After a heated argument with her parents, she runs to the forest and makes a passionate cry for help to the stars, in the hopes that they will give her guidance and strength to help her entire kingdom. (‘This Wish’ is staying btw, but with adjusted lyrics) Her plea pulls down the brightest star out of the sky and transforms it into a glowing ethereal humanoid being without a name.

Here is where we meet Orion. Orion is THE wishing star of legend. He is a glowing, Black-coded, humanoid boy around the same age as Asha. Newly formed, he has no name and no sense of right or wrong, much like Pinocchio, but he reveals himself to be a powerful shapeshifter with magic celestial powers. The starboy is aided with the tiny, Luma-like canon version of Star, named Little Dipper, as his personal companion. Little Dipper is more mischevious than Orion, but it's also a powerful wish granter in a tiny celestial body. With a reworked, more orchestral version of "At All Costs", Orion takes Asha on a gorgeous flight, explaining his purpose to help Asha, as the duo sings in harmony above the stardust-sprinkled woodlands, with Little Dipper setting the scene. After the song ends, Asha tries to name all the constellations off the top of her head, and ultimately names the starboy Orion (serving as a subtle callback to Kiss the Girl). Asha brings Orion back to the kingdom, and she tries to teach him how to grant the peoples’ wishes. As the two plans to give the wish orbs back to the people, Asha notices that her parents are angered over the townspeople praising Orion’s descend, hoping that he will grant the wishes of all the people. Feeling threatened by Orion’s presence, the King and Queen scheme to use dark magic to kill Fate and steal her magic, so that they will remain as the only wish-granters in Rosas, but at the risk of permanently being surrendered to the dark side. (This Is The Thanks I Get, except it's reworked into a grand, badass, orchestral villain duet with Magnifico on the first verse and Amaya on the second verse)

Desperate to warn the kingdom about her parents’ true colors, Asha disguises herself (a la Sleeping Beauty) as a peasant girl, while Orion tries to disguise himself as a normal human boy. As the two try to grant the wishes of the townpeople who haven't given their wishes to the king and queen, the town descends into chaos with some wishes spiraling out of control. While it is a moment of hilarity, Asha and Orion come to a realization that some wishes should never be granted in the first place, as they're more likely to cause harm and chaos than pure good. The two comes across a group of seven teenagers modeled after the Seven Dwarfs, Asha's longtime team, and Orion starts to get to know each one of them, before planning a rebellion against her parents, and yet, Asha is secretly hesitant to disobey her parents, she confesses to Orion - in a short reprise of At All Costs - about how she used to be perfectly obedient and a perfect princess to her people. Meanwhile, Orion reveals to the Seven Teens that he’s still learning to grant wishes, but they also end up horribly wrong, but he comes to a realization that he shouldn't grant wishes that could cause harm, no matter how much they beg for it. The Teens make a promise to Asha that they will protect her secret, as well as Orion's. The duo and the teens team up to stop the King and Queen, with a reworked version of "Knowing What I Know Now."

During the epic climax, Orion and Asha create a diversion, with Asha freeing the wishes with her team and learning to be a good leader in doing so, while Orion shapeshifts into multiple forms to battle the King and Queen and distract them away from the castle, but they capture Little Dipper into the scepter, and use Dipper's magic to transform their cat Cleo into a giant dragon (akin to Maleficent's dragon form) that flies them to the top of the castle, with Orion chained up. The parents chain Asha to the top of the castle where the battle occurs, and they force their daughter to watch Orion suffer. Engulfed by the pain of losing her protector, Asha breaks into the This Wish reprise, as do the other residents of Rosas. The King and Queen try to push Asha off the castle to her death, but the townspeoples' voices lift her up, as does Orion's, and he uses his magic to make her float above in mid-air. Everyone's hearts beginning to glow and attract their wishes back to their hearts as they sing in unison. Orion transfers most of his celestial powers into Asha, who uses her temporary celestial powers to free Little Dipper from the scepter, and blast the King and Queen to their death, while Orion simultaneously creates a powerful sword to throw into Cleo's heart, killing her as well. After a moment of silence, Asha breaks down into tears and feels bittersweet that she’ll never have her parents again, but more optimistic about being the ruler the kingdom desperately needed - someone who will choose only the best wishes to come true. Orion comes down to Earth to comforts Asha with a hug, and the kingdom rejoices with the evil King and Queen gone for good.

Cut to a few months later with Asha hosting her first royal ball for Rosas, and dancing with Orion, similar to the endings of Sleeping Beauty and Beauty and the Beast. Before Orion flies back to the night sky to become the Wishing Star, he gets Little Dipper to create a magic wand and grants her the role of a honorary Blue Fairy guardian, transforming Asha’s purple queen gown into a beautiful, glittering, baby blue gown. Orion informs to Asha that Asha will be reincarnated into a true Blue Fairy after her time on Earth comes to an end, but Orion will descend back down to Rosas every now and then to help Asha. As a final gift, even though he admits his magic is not perfect just yet, Orion finally grants Asha’s wish and creates a lute for her to play for her people, but Asha realizes what her true wish was all along: To be a good leader to all of Rosas.

After Orion forms into the glimmering Wishing Star in the night sky above Rosas, Queen Asha looks down on the townspeople of Rosas with hope in her smile and she looks up at the wishing star above her, with a hope that everyone will have a wish to come true, because now, Queen Asha knows that there is no force, no magic more powerful than the power of a wish, for a wish is more powerful when it’s inside your heart.

Cut to a few nights later, after the credits have rolled, when Asha walks out onto the balcony above the kingdom. She pulls out a music sheet, and begins to play ‘When You Wish Upon A Star’ for the stars, as an homage to Orion.

My version of Wish will also contain hundreds of Easter Eggs that all pay tribute to ALL 61 FILMS in the Walt Disney Animation Studios library, all worked seamlessly into the context of the story, not just containing the ones that inspire the film like Sleeping Beauty or Snow White. Anyway, all I’m saying is that Disney should’ve hired me and put me into the writers room, because as a Disney fan, I know how to make this story work and how to make it even better, and I hope you guys love this version of the story! Oh, and also, screw Disney for donating to a genocide. Goodnight Kingdom of Rosas!

#disney #wish #disney wish #asha #king magnifico #queen amaya #disney100 #disney animation

[bogleech]

31 Days of Bizarre Movie Monsters Wrapup Tumblr Post

Deep Dark: the monster is a sexy hole and not really the villain.

Vanishing on 7th Street: the world is consumed by darkness, literally.

Vivarium: human cuckoo birds still not sure how to take care of the humans.

Tetsuo the Iron Man: repressed homosexuality might give you rocket shoes.

The Babadook: sometimes trauma is a weird guy.

The Autopsy of Jane Doe: when a dead witch is actually neither thing.

The Empty Man: psychic cults, tulpas and a hare-brained human internet. Ties in with a short comic series that provides more essential lore.

Smile: sometimes trauma is where a weird guy lives.

Little Otik: a piece of wood thinks it’s a baby, but doesn’t get it quite right.

Rubber: a tire kills people in a confounding meta-meta narrative.

Honorable Mentions I: some monsters that didn’t make it in.

The Ritual: a fucked up deer thing might be a norse demigod? This wound up the most normal monster in the list and could have probably stood to be a different choice, but I had fun reviewing it.

Galaxy of Terror: please pick up after your children before going extinct. The only movie I included that’s considered “so bad it’s good.”

Eraserhead: he’s just a little guy :(

Amulet: weird bats, a mollusk goddess of revenge and a truly horrific final twist.

Event Horizon: the famous “spa

ceship possessed by hell” movie. She just wants to go home, that’s all.

In the Tall Grass: this time the Stephen King monster IS the midwest. A field of grass warps space/time to torment intruders.

It Follows: about a sexually transmitted stalker.

Honorable Mentions II: more movies that were left out of the main feature.

Malignant: also just a little guy but also kind of a prick. An atmospheric horror film that (intentionally) becomes cheesy horror-action.

Incarnation: a single mom vs. a forgotten goddess in a heartwrenching and creatively immersive found footage film.

Possum: about a man and his terrifying puppet, but neither are the real monster.

Await Further Instructions: a toxic family are prisoners of their television.

Terrified: ghostly encounters that are really something completely different.

The Tingler: doctors hate him! Local man discovers the weird bug that lives in everybody’s vertebrae.

Oculus: mirror hates people, dogs and houseplants, may be most unbeatable antagonist featured.

Fiend Without a Face: the original “tentacled brain” monster movie and more.

1408: rude customer vs. sadistic trickster god hotel room with multiple, equally canon endings.

Pontypool: the most “abstract” monster in the entire feature.

Ring: a weirder horror franchise than most people actually know, and Sadako to begin with is weirder than most people remember.

Ana and Bruno: like I say at the end of the review, it’s a more touching Toy Story meets an even darker Babadook

[fernsnailz]

February 2024 Review Roundup

well i sure did watch some stuff and read one book this month

the things i finished this month reminded me that for every incredible piece of art i find myself enjoying, i end up watching some Hot Garbage immediately after to balance things out again. idk why i do this.

i have quite a bit to say about both the things i enjoyed and the things that brought me physical pain this month, so there is um. a lot under the cut. any previous desire for brevity i had in january has been completely thrown out the window as i use these roundups as an outlet to gush about things i like and complain about things i didn't. fair warning, if you open the readmore you will be scrolling for a while. enjoy i guess

House of Leaves

does any other book out there have the balls to write a completely fake interview with stephen king

House of Leaves is a novel you gotta throw around a little bit. It feels really weird that my copy is still in the pristine state I bought it in - It seems like it should have water damage and smell like mildew with its pages falling out and spine cracked into pieces. Getting the full story from this book requires flipping back and forth, turning it around, searching for answers. All things considered it’s not that difficult of a read, but its format still allows you to feel like you’re discovering every hidden piece for yourself, and I really liked that interactivity. I was engaged pretty much the whole way through.

I don’t really think I’ll be able to revisit this book anytime soon though. It’s difficult for me to format what else I’d like to say about it because to be honest, it caught me off guard and disturbed me on a fairly personal level. There’s a relief I feel when I remember that I don’t actually know what was going on with the house - maybe that was intentional on the book’s behalf, maybe I just didn’t look hard enough for answers. I don’t know. But the implication that something divine was down there was enough of an answer for me. The book's good. read it if you want a spooooooky time or if you never want to look at a hallway the same way again

Doctor Who (Series 1-4) (rewatch)

ok so this is a fuckload of doctor who to cover so i’m gonna give some thoughts on a few of the characters and my favorite + least favorite episodes

9th doctor: My favorite butch lesbian. Christopher Eccleston truly embodies the concept of The Doctor so, so well: otherworldly guy who knows too much, genuinely cares about life across the universe, and also has a bit of deep, unresolved rage. His moments of joy and careless fun stick with me the most, he absolutely radiates with life and brings so much to this character.

Rose: I first watched Doctor Who when I was in middle school, and I didn’t like Rose that much back then. And guys. I have bad news. I'm still not really much of a Rose fan

I definitely understood her more this watch through - that desire for adventure and some sort of control over her life, emotions so strong that she’s willing to throw near everything away. That’s just what being 19 is like sometimes. I think Rose is a very compelling character who just happens to frustrate me a bit. And that’s kinda the point, her co-dependent relationship with the Doctor is doomed to fail and it's meant to hurt. Ultimately, I think when I first watched the show I was too young to understand Rose, and now I’m just too old to relate to her.

Captain Jack: Jack is my favorite character. I fucking love this guy. Dude has the worst luck in the whole universe and still cannot be stopped. Legendary. Every episode with him is a goddamn delight because he has so much chemistry with every single cast member. No notes 10/10 i love my problematic bisexual king

10th doctor: About four episodes into David Tennant’s run I realized that he dresses like a Hazbin Hotel character and it made me very sad. Still, there’s a reason this guy inspired every middle schooler to buy a pair of converse in 2008. He has style, he has depth, he’s got the sauce. It’s genuinely terrifying to see his anger, I like that a lot of 10’s run is about his denial of godhood and power over life in the universe, something that the rest of the time lords desired. idk i like my sad pathetic little weasel but he's also a huge fucking asshole sometimes which sucks. especially when it's directed at Martha.

Martha: Martha I am so sorry for what this show put you through. Martha was my favorite companion when I first watched the show, and I still have a huge soft spot for her. Her ability to hold her own and navigate foreign worlds using her own intelligence absolutely rules, and her drive forward is unbreakable. But the show seems to put her down at every possible opportunity, most notably with how 10 treats her. Her struggles and wants are constantly ignored, and she's often treated as a rebound from Rose. And I like that she eventually chooses to end it by not traveling with 10 anymore, but it hurts because it feels like she was never given the same chance or care that Rose and Donna were. This era of Doctor Who really doesn’t treat its black companions well because Mickey goes through something similar - both Martha and Mickey are characters designed to be ignored or left behind, and it sucks.

Donna: Donna Noble is one of the greatest fictional characters to ever exist. Despite seemingly living a fairly average life and working a fairly average job, Donna reflects the idea that no one is truly "average" and every single person is brimming with personality, life, and love. I love that her relationship with 10 is purely platonic, personally their friendship feels like it has a lot more depth than either of the romance-oriented relationships 10 had with Rose and Martha. 10 and Donna bounce off of each other so well and it's delightful, Donna brings so much humor and life to every world she's taken to and it's incredible. I wish her and Captain Jack could have interacted more.

My favorite episode: The Runaway Bride is hard to not choose as my favorite. I have a blast every time I watch this episode and it’s such a good introduction for Donna. Also the Tardis car chase kills me, I love when it cuts to the kids in the back of another car clapping and cheering. I was also surprised by the episode Midnight - it’s dreadful to watch and I kinda loved it. So much spirals out of control when shit hits the fan, even though no one has any idea what they’re trying to fight against. Really interesting exploration as to how fear can drive people apart.

My least favorite episode: It’s Love & Monsters. I wish I liked this episode - stories that follow regular ass people living in this world are often some of the best episodes in the series (Weeping Angels and all that). And this episode definitely has some of that. It’s honestly really touching to see this group of nerds get together and enjoy life in the first part of the episode. I think the antagonist of “guy who absorbs people” ends up dragging down any charm this story had because he just. eats all of the interesting characters. But despite me disliking this episode, I honestly have a deep respect for it - it’s fucking crazy. It ends with the main guy telling us about his sex life with his girlfriend who is now stuck in a piece of concrete. Where else are you going to get a story like this. It fucking sucks and that’s hilarious

oh also the production design: GODDDDDD I FUCKING LOVE THE PRODUCTION DESIGN AND SETS ON THIS SHOW. I love how dirty and rundown a lot of the spaceship sets look with wires and lights scattered everywhere. And a number of alien designs also go CRAZY with the prosthetics - I keep thinking about the Hath from The Doctor’s Daughter and how every head prosthetic had liquid inside it that could bubble. Absolutely crazy. I also love the moments where you can clearly see they did not have that much time and just had to throw something together or pain a bald cap green. Jank is the nature of sci-fi production design and I dearly love and miss that Doctor Who jank.

Rebuild of Evangelion

Last year after finishing the original Evangelion series + End of Evangelion, I remember going through the Evangelion tumblr tag and being very confused by the number of slice of life/found family-esque fanworks of the cast. It left me puzzled and thinking “...did we even watch the same thing??”

APPARENTLY NOT

[spoiler warning here because these movies are very good and i give the best parts away. if you want to watch these movies then DO IT NOW!!!!!!!!]

I honestly never expected a world where these characters got a happy ending. I so, so badly wish I could see 3.0 and 3.0+1.0 in theaters - these movies are stunning. I know I say things “go crazy” a lot, but man. They go fucking CRAZY.

While I have a few issues with how the first two movies adapted the original show, I do think the changes they made better serve the story this rebuild is trying to tell. For example, my favorite episode in the original Eva series is episode 18, where Toji is chosen to pilot Unit 03. It’s absolutely terrifying because Shinji doesn’t know who 03’s pilot is, yet he’s forced to be inside Unit 01 as it tears 03 apart. His resolve not to kill anyone despite not even knowing who’s in danger is an aspect of that episode I love and speaks to Shinji's inherent humanity, and when he learns Toji was in there it hurts even more. The rebuild movies change Unit 03’s pilot to Auska, and Shinji knows she’s in there from the start. I think this choice works for the movies and is still an effective emotional beat, but personally I still prefer the version where Shinji had no idea who was in there. That lack of knowledge is infinitely more terrifying to me.

I really like what these movies did with some of the angel designs though. The sixth angel (the fuckin. blue diamond cube thing) works really well in 3D/CG animation. The way the thing warps and moves is otherly and terrifying - and it’s just a fucking cube. I’ve always really loved how the Eva series approaches angel designs and the divine - despite the alien-like designs, there’s often something extremely familiar about them. They’re often reminiscent of an animal, a machine, or a human. This is also how they approached the anti-universe in these movies, I loved how it takes the form of various locations from the series and turns them into a movie set. It’s deeply familiar, but ultimately just an illusion of familiarity like the angels and the divine.

Also I gotta say. I fucking love Mari. I think she’s hilarious. She first meets Shinji by accidentally parachuting into him and then immediately starts crawling on all fours to sniff him. This girl also introduces “Beast Mode” where the Eva pilots can go wild turn their mechs into a fucking. superpowered beast of some sort. And also she defeats a whole army by using the Eiffel Tower as a spear. She’s such an absurd character and I honestly kinda love it. The only thing I knew about these movies before watching them was this gif of her Backing That Shit Up and she truly lives up to the insane nature of this shot.

My favorite section of these movies is definitely the first part of 3.0+1.0 where the pilots are basically just living a domestic life in a small town - it’s truly beautiful. The growth that Rei’s copy goes through here is fantastic, I love stories about seemingly emotionless beings learning how to live. And right after she dies, we get the shot that absolutely broke me the first time I saw it:

This shit. The way you can just barely tell he’s been crying from the red around his eyes. They don't talk about it, they barely linger on it, but it's allowed just enough time to punch you in the gut. I don’t know why this shot got me as hard as it did but goddamn. jesus christ. i want to throw up

There’s some goofy shit in these movies. The infinite synch rate. Misato’s stupidass hat and sunglasses. Some goofy ass 3D animation that doesn’t age super well. The rainbow that shows up every time an angel dies. But these things really didn’t take me out of the core of these films, and there’s so much genuine emotion and beauty in this series that had me absolutely hooked - especially in the last two films. They go crazy. My favorite line is 100% “The only thing a son can do for his father is pat him on the shoulder… or kill him.” and man. ain’t that what Evangelion is all about. i love these movies

High School Musical 3

kinda slaps just a little bit

High School Musical 3 starts with a finale number. The last high school basketball game of Troy Bolton’s life - and it goes kinda hard. The classic pep band brass that’s essential to so many High School Musical numbers returns, and the constant theme of two feuding cheer teams in the background? Genius. This is truly art. I love listening to Now or Never without visuals because in the middle Troy just starts coughing and gagging seemingly out of nowhere

Unfortunately, starting the movie at such a high point means that the rest of the runtime doesn’t quite match up to it. The story lags and meanders quite a bit, but part of me kinda appreciates that - it’s their last semester of high school, which is always a time of confusion and turmoil. However, I do have a pitch for how they could have countered the constant falling action this movie seems to go through:

The Wildcats should have lost their last game at the beginning of the movie.

What if the game is instead the inciting incident that leads Troy and his besties through their tumultuous last semester? Troy is still torn between basketball and theater, but his identity would be even further challenged here - is winning and success all that matters for him, or is it the love of sport and performance that keeps him going? idk whatever this movie came out 16 years ago i can’t be out here writing AUs for it jgnfsgfnjdksg

Some miscellaneous thoughts about this movie that i don’t care about formatting into larger paragraphs:

Ryan and Sharpay’s number (I Want It All) slaps as usual. The part where Ryan shouts “MADISON SQUARE GARDEN!!!!!!!” makes me so happy every time i hear it

The production design and sets go absolutely fucking crazy. I still have no idea how they pulled off the spinning hallway in Scream.

One of the classic staples of HSM is Chad’s shirts. Most of them are fairly silly and like something you would expect to find in the walmart clearance section. However, there’s one shirt he has in this movie that confused the hell out of me. It’s this one:

What the FUCK does Greenster mean. Is it just a combination of Green and Monster?? Why??? What green monster are we talking about here????? Where the fuck did this shirt come from?????????

Avatar The Last Airbender (2024)

There’s really only one word I can think of to describe what this show is like: sauceless. No flavor. No depth. No character. No sauce. This show is honestly so fucking boring and seems to fundamentally misunderstand what the appeal of the original Avatar series is - not necessarily because things are changed or removed from the original, but because nothing of substance is added in return. 

Most of the characters are mere echoes of their original counterparts when compared to their source material. Sokka is reduced to a guy who wants to fight good, Katara’s stubborn and confrontational nature is very rarely utilized, and Aang’s mischievous antics and love of fun is sorely missing. One of the major reasons for the dull interpretations seems to be the directing - While I have faith that most of these actors are trying their best (especially since a number of them are kids/young adults), the direction seems to be incredibly lackluster and takes away nearly every cast member’s stage presence or personality. There’s a number of reaction shots of the main trio that just look like this: 😐😐😐 as if they were just told to “look concerned” at the events unfolding before them. And these issues are apparent in the majority of the performances - for example, General Zhao talks like he’s in a board meeting up until the last episode, and it’s an incredibly flat performance. He talks somewhat monotone in the original series as well, but this live-action take on the character often meanders with his dialogue and lacks that sharp, terrifying quality that I think this character needs. Uncle Iroh also feels incredibly stiff in this adaptation, and it’s a goddamn crime that they took away the cunty little outfit and chains he was originally wearing when he gets captured by earthbenders. wait who said that

Credit where credit is due, there’s a few cast members that seem to be giving their best. It’s clear that Aang’s actor enjoys the role and does pretty well despite the lackluster direction and dialogue he’s given. On top of that, I think Zuko’s actor is honestly the best part of the show. His take on Zuko leans much more into teenage tendencies and sarcasm, which, although it can be silly, is a welcome take of the character in my opinion and pretty fun to watch. There’s this one line he has at the beginning of episode 2 where, in an incredibly whiny tone of voice, he goes “He RAN! The ultimate warrior! He’s a Coward :((((“ and the read is so. fucking funny

The case of bad direction isn’t limited to the performances, however. It’s also stunningly apparent in how everything is shot. Despite being in a widescreen format, most shots are incredibly centered - you could crop the entire runtime into a 4:3 frame and you wouldn’t be cutting out much of anything. I’ve seen some speculation that this was an intentional choice to make things more adaptable or readable for TikTok/phone video, but honestly I think that’s a dumb take. I think the issue stems from a lack of creativity and thoughtless composition. Keeping everything staged in the center can make shots feel disjointed, lacking much depth, or completely empty. It’s a boring way to shoot and indicates that the show lacks any unique vision at all.

Overall, this show doesn't really seem to understand what makes Avatar interesting in the first place. It's more interested in spectacle and action than the characters' relationships, emotions, and mistakes. I try not to compare it too much to the original since it's allowed to take liberties with its adaptation, but very few of its changes add much to the end result or give it a unique voice. It's just sauceless and boring.

Some YouTube videos i liked in February:

💥 My House.WAD - Inside Doom's Most Terrifying Mod (some supplemental House of Leaves material for ya) 💥 Martha Jones Deserved Better (this video explains how Doctor Who did Martha dirty better than i ever could) 💥 bringing JUSTICE to the worst garfield game 💥 Selling Kids for Clout: The Downfall of Family Channels

And that’s my roundup for February! Thank you for reading, I promise there are no more reviews left to scroll through below this goodbye. Nope, nothing else I watched this month. Bye!

…ok is everyone gone. phew, i’m glad no one noticed i pulled an hbomberguy and hid the largest part of this post under a false ending. Anyway holy shit i need to talk about hazbin hotel

Hazbin Hotel

well i didn’t like it

Hazbin Hotel is a weird, fascinating mess of a show. Every episode left me wondering what creative decisions (or lack thereof) led to the sequence of images I just watched. There’s been a lot of discussion of this show recently and I’m not interested in covering every critique I have, but there’s a few things that I'd like to talk about somewhat in-depth.

Hell is real and it's just Red Chicago

The setting of Hell is kinda boring in this show.

Let me try to put this into perspective. Aside from the hotel, here’s a list of the locations we see in Hell:

A boardroom

A video store

Vox’s evil lair (it has cyber sharks which is kinda cool)

Various streets

Another boardroom

A BDSM club

Carmilla’s house (it’s gray and has. balconies?)

A porn studio

A bar

Another bar

A town square (full of cannibals)

None of these locations really take on any sort of otherworldly form besides some vague demonic imagery scattered throughout (and the cannibals. i guess. whatever). In short, Hazbin Hotel’s setting resembles Chicago more than it does Hell.

I can see a world where that’s intentional. Perhaps making Hell resemble a modern city could be used as a thematic tool or point of relatability? But Hazbin doesn’t really do anything like that - since the characters rarely ever interact with their environments, these locations end up seeming like they lack creativity, like they’re just cardboard sets where characters go to swear. They all start to blend together after a while - every street feels the same, every boardroom fades into the background, and every bar feels like a google image search result for the word “club.” This world feels stunningly empty despite the busy designs and colors. Even though the backgrounds are painted and designed fairly well, nothing of substance is ever really added to them through the story.

However, a few musical numbers take effort to break away from these settings. This felt like a weight off of my shoulders whenever it happened, it was nice to see some interesting setpieces and backgrounds that weren’t red. I liked the bombastic and over-the-top broadway lights in Loser and the glowing alternate world in Charlie and Lucifer’s song. But these moments are few and crowded by the dull locations in Hell - or worse, the Hotel itself.

Despite being the namesake of the show, the actual Hazbin Hotel is… lifeless. Which, yeah, it’s a hotel where dead people go in the afterlife, but it’s missing any sort of personality or history besides “it’s old and falling apart.” I expected the hotel to be full of secrets - like maybe some hidden passages or rooms, or mysterious cabinets full of rotted meats, or old valuables hidden under the rugs by the previous owners. Something for the cast to explore and discover, and as they get closer to each other they also start to understand the hotel more. Alastor seems very intent on keeping the physical hotel standing for some reason, but I never really understood why. There’s nothing there. And that nothingness is fully realized when at the end of the show, they just rebuild the entire hotel to be grand and beautiful - an emotional beat that didn’t hit me at all because I never felt like I knew the hotel in the first place. Despite rebuilding it from the ground up, it will feel just as empty.

3 SHOTS THAT DRIVE ME CRAZY

I was truly baffled at how some of these scenes are timed and put together. Multiple sequences left me feeling nauseous and dazed - the camera moves like it’s being swung on the end of a rope, and there’s so many misplaced or meaningless cuts scattered through these episodes.

There’s a sequence of three shots in the first episode that I want to dissect. I will fully admit that I'm breaching nitpicking territory here, but the shot composition issues in this show are pretty rampant and my analysis here is just a hyper-specific look at a single part of that larger problem. Hopefully you can also use it as a quick storyboarding lesson too idk

First, we see Adam teasing Charlie.

Then, it cuts straight to this shot:

A few things here. 

Shot 2 is just closer on the characters, which is not a great idea to cut to after the previous waist-up shot. On top of being a jarring jump cut, there is no purpose for this new shot. All the information we see here (Adam laughs, Charlie fake laughs) could have just been conveyed in the previous shot.

Despite the characters being in the same position as the last shot, the background changes. This straight up just feels like an error. I think the idea is supposed to be that the camera is at a different angle, but the position of the characters does not convey that. It looks like reality changes behind them.

And if that’s not enough, this is the shot we get immediately after those two:

In this shot, the residents of the hotel sit on the couch as Vaggie walks into the shot, framing them between her legs. But there’s something… off.

Vaggie either looks like she’s floating or she’s three stories tall. Quick storyboard lesson as to why:

The main problem with this shot is that the perspective of the background doesn’t match up with where Vaggie is placed. The couch is framed as if the camera were above it, but Vaggie is framed like the camera is floor-level below her. I’ve traced the shot and added a perspective grid to hopefully better illustrate this:

Do you see what I mean? If the camera WAS actually on the floor like Vaggie’s position in the shot suggests, the composition would look more like this:

Notice how much closer the floor grid is to the bottom of the frame and how you can see the underside of the couch.

And to be fair, this is probably what the original storyboard for this shot looked like! Personally I think something went wrong in the compositing stage - this might be a couch background from another shot that was reused here to save time, or whoever approved this shot just let the error slide since the shot is so short (i've been there. sometimes you let the jank slide). Most animated shows will have some poorly framed shots and continuity errors because mistakes are bound to happen, but two egregious ones right next to each other like this is. pretty bad. It's so noticeable from a directing perspective.

Here’s the thing: these three shots happen in the span of like 10 seconds. Most viewers probably wouldn’t notice these issues, and that's fine. But even though these errors are quick, they stack upon each other so fast that even if you can’t pinpoint exactly what’s wrong, something still feels wrong. There’s so many other moments where the show breaks extremely basic shot composition, continuity, and staging rules - for example, the second musical number of the show breaks the 180 rule like four times for no good reason. The whole show feels like a dizzy, nauseating mess because the shots rarely feel like they form anything cohesive.

MY ROOMMATE TOLD ME TO GO TO BED SO HERE ARE SOME FINAL THOUGHTS

Here’s a rundown on some other thoughts that I don’t care to format into larger sections:

The show seems to lack much to say about sin and redemption other than “redemption good.” like sure, but what are they being redeemed from? Is heaven truly the place they deserve to go after being redeemed, even though it’s shown to be unjust? Are there sins that are too great to be redeemed from, or others that shouldn't be considered sins at all? I asked myself a number of questions like this, but never got many answers from Hazbin.

This show has a bad relationship with kink and sex. Both are mostly used as a punchline or a form of control. I didn’t like it. Perhaps the reason Hazbin never really comments on the nature of sin is because it needs you to consider sex and kink sinful or otherly for these jokes to hit.

Some of the animation is crazy good. I will praise any animator that even attempts to make these character designs move. A number of extremely talented people worked on this show, a few of the musical sequences in particular have some incredible movement.

Alastor is a very boring character. It’s wild that most of the side characters in this show only exist to talk about how much they like or hate Alastor, he mostly just stands to the side of some shots or kills random nameless goons. I expected him to have a much larger role in the story, but he just gets his ass kicked in the final episode and then crawls back to the hotel.

Episode 4 is the most cohesive, and i think Angel is the best character in the show. Unfortunately, the fact that Hazbin takes so much effort to show Angel’s misery left me… concerned? None of the other characters get treated as poorly as Angel by the narrative. There’s a few smaller explorations of trauma, but nothing remotely compares to what Angel is put through on-screen. This isn’t to say that I think the whole cast needs to be extremely traumatized and constantly miserable, but rather that I find it concerning that the only character subjected to incredibly graphic abuse and torture (that we see or hear about) is the gay sex worker. Which sucks, because I think the concept of hypersexuality resulted from sexual abuse is an important topic worthy of discussing in adult media. I just think they tried to execute this theme without much critical thought beforehand.

I think the voice cast does a fantastic job for the most part. Keith David is way too good for Husk.

I really liked the one shot where Charlie opens her phone and we see that she has a contact for every individual egg minion.

I was very brave and got through this whole review without talking about my new least favorite character of all time, Vox. here’s what I think of him:

The overall vision and end result of Hazbin Hotel is just mediocre. While I don’t know what led to the messy state this show ended up in, my guess is that it was probably the result of inadequate direction, sloppy writing, and lacking creative support from the studios involved. Because of this, please understand that I have no desire or intention to put down any individual artists that worked on this show - I hope it's clear that most of my criticisms are directed at the larger vision these artists were given to execute and/or the lack of creative support they received while working on this show.

I also don’t really have much desire to participate in any further Hazbin discussion or discourse because it has wasted enough of my time already and I want to be free of this curse. please spare my inbox from hazbin hotel discourse. please. i'm begging.

You want to know what the most fucked up thing about this is though? Despite everything I said about Hazbin, Avatar the Last Airbender 2024 is still the worst show I watched this month. I would take Hazbin over Avatar 2024 literally any day.

well if you got this far. thanks for reading. also sorry you read all that. whelp alright back into my hole i go bye bye

#to get to my hazbin hotel opinions you must first read my pitch on how i would have written high school musical 3 #jesus christ. either i gotta watch less things or learn to shut the hell up next month this is a longass post #review roundup #long post

[flanaganfilm]

Hey Mike, can you talk about your work on Revival? What was it like reading the book, writing the script, making it all work? I know people thought it was going to be like Midnight Mass, but King is tackling religion far differently & I would have loved to see your adaptation of that. Furthermore, why did you decide to leave the project? I read somewhere it had to do with the film rights, but I’m sure there’s more to that story & id love to hear your side of it.

Also, Life of Chuck…. 1.85:1 or Scope? C’mon, Mike! Spill the beans!

Thanks!

I was very excited about Revival. King had given me the rights after I finished the script for Doctor Sleep, and we took it around town as a pitch. Warner Bros. picked up the project and commissioned the script.

I wrote a script I love, and turned it in to Warner Bros. It couldn't be more different than Midnight Mass; that was always a very weird and unfair comparison. The only thing they have in common is that each story features a priest; any comparisons wouldn't have survived opening weekend, that was never really a thing.

Revival is one of King's scariest and most effective books, and I was madly in love with the movie. I stayed very true to the book, and the story spanned over decades. It was a character-forward epic about mortality, and the futility of hope, dealing with themes of lost love, addiction, and hubris. In fact, it has way more in common with Frankenstein than Midnight Mass, and I was stoked to make it. It wasn't cheap, though - the set pieces were big, the VFX budget was intimidating, and it fit into a type of budget that isn't typically made these days.

For those reasons, ultimately, after Doctor Sleep's disappointing performance at the box office, Warner Bros. didn't want to pursue the movie. They had really liked the Frankenstein comparisons, but that only comes into play at the very end of the story. Their pitch was to start the story there, and jettison most of the actual novel in favor of a new, heavily Frankenstein inspired narrative. It was a bridge too far, and changed the source material too radically.

Warner Bros. faith in the project had been seriously damaged by the box office performance of Doctor Sleep, and the character-forward epic I was pitching was just too risky given the hefty price tag. Ultimately, I wasn't willing to change the story as drastically as they wanted to, and it just didn't make sense to make it for that budget - so they opted not to make the film, and that was that. I didn't leave the project at all - the studio just didn't want to move forward with it. Revival is not the most obvious project. It is more expensive than a lot of comparable horror titles, and we didn't want to do it as a streaming movie - we bet the farm on a theatrical feature, and the cards didn't fall in our favor this time. My window of availability as a director rapidly closed. I was heading fast into Midnight Club and Fall of the House of Usher for Netflix, so without a viable attachment from me for at least a few years, the project couldn't move forward at all, and the rights reverted back to Stephen King. We discussed whether we wanted to try to keep it alive, but we were already deep into talks about The Dark Tower, whose rights were about to become available after years of being tied up. Steve doesn't like to give the same person multiple rights as a general rule, because he doesn't want his projects to stall out in development, which makes good sense. Given the choice, we absolutely wanted to focus on The Dark Tower. We let Revival go, and last I heard, some other people were developing it as a TV project. I absolutely love the script I wrote, and I'm disappointed that Warner Bros. didn't want to make it, but it's their studio and their prerogative. I can't say I blame their reasoning. In fact, I completely see their point. I could have dug in and fought harder to keep it, but that might mean I wouldn't have gotten the rights to The Dark Tower.

And I hate to say it, but Revival would have taken a similar narrative approach to Doctor Sleep, and - well - audiences just didn't show up for that movie. It's entirely likely that the same would have happened here - this was another long, character-centric story that wasn't entirely a mainstream horror tale, and it was expensive. And this didn't have The Shining connection to lean on. I am so sorry to say this, but I don't have a lot of faith that audiences would have supported us if we'd bet the farm on a theatrical release of Revival as I wanted to make it. So honestly, I think it all worked out for the best. You win some and you lose some in this business. Who knows, maybe it'll come back some day - I also lost the rights to Gerald's Game back in 2014 when we couldn't find a partner who wanted to make the movie. They eventually came around again, and the timing worked out. The same could happen here - maybe we get another chance, or may we revisit it down the line as a limited series. Stranger things have happened. Ka is a wheel. Or, maybe this new television production of Revival will get off the ground, and if it does I wish them nothing but the best with it. It's a phenomenal story, and I'll be first in line to see it.

#revival #in another life

[insanityclause]

Tom Hiddleston Says Revisiting Loki Was ‘An Honor,’ Thanks Co-Stars for ‘Chemistry and Inspiration’

Ahead of accepting Variety’s Virtuoso Award at the Miami Film Festival, Hiddleston reflects on previous roles and impactful creative collaboration.

By Jenelle Riley

Tom Hiddleston knows “Miami.” That is, all the words to the Will Smith song titled after the famous city — a video of him reciting the lyrics once broke the Internet (not an unusual occurrence for the actor.) That was in 2012 when he was doing press for “The Avengers,” the movie that would change his life and career. It was also the same tour that last brought him to the city — but that was a whirlwind two days of press. “I do recall promoting ‘Avengers’ in Spanish and the city had a great, unique energy,” he says. “I’m really excited to be back as an explorer.”

The British actor will be returning on April 9 to the Miami Film Festival to accept Variety’s Virtuoso Award for his career achievements and will participate in a Q&A at the Adrienne Arsht Center – Knight Concert Hall. Tickets are available here.

And while Miami is known for its food and culture, the actor has one thing on his mind. “What will the weather be like?” he queries of the town’s famously balmy temperatures. “Because I’m coming from the wettest February on record in London’s history.”

Hiddleston admits it’s somewhat ironic to be receiving the Virtuoso Award there, because “when somebody says ‘virtuoso,’ I think of a dazzling soloist in an orchestra, and I feel about as far from that image as it’s possible to imagine.”

He continues: “I am the opposite of a soloist, actually. I always feel like I’m at my strongest in a team. What we do is a collective creative act and the joy of it is in the shared imagination.”

This might explain why his resume is filled with standout ensemble pieces in every genre. Hiddleston’s worked on stage — he earned a Tony nomination for his 2019 Broadway debut in “Betrayal” — the SAG Award-nominated ensemble of “Midnight in Paris,” up through his most current turn as the God of Mischief in Season 2 of the Disney+ series “Loki.”

The second season’s finale, “Glorious Purpose,” remains the highest-rated episode ever in the Marvel Cinematic Universe and brought a conclusion to an epic character arc that has spanned 14 years of Hiddleston’s life. The actor, who also served as producer on both seasons, says it would have been impossible without his “deep bench” of castmates, which includes Owen Wilson, Sophia Di Martino and Season 2 addition Ke Huy Quan, Oscar-winner for “Everything Everywhere All at Once.”

“I don’t know who said it, but there’s the phrase: ‘If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together,’” he notes. “And it’s never been truer than for this show.”

Community and collaboration are perhaps his favorite aspects of the work. “I truly find the most interesting work I have discovered happens between people. You show up and ready and prepared, but you take that preparation onto the dance floor and see what there is between you. If I’ve done anything of value, it’s because of that chemistry and inspiration I receive from another actor.”

Hiddleston says that team spirit extends to his next project, “The Life of Chuck,” a big-screen adaptation of the Stephen King novella that also stars Karen Gillan, Mark Hamill and Chewitel Ejiofor. “I’m a lifelong tennis fan and I feel like being on set is like playing tennis,” Hiddleston notes. “It’s all about who you’re playing opposite and the energy back and forth between you. And I have some great partners on ‘The Life of Chuck.'”

As for continuing Loki’s story in a third season, it’s a question Hiddleston is asked pretty much every day — several times. “I truthfully don’t know,” he says. “I am so proud of where we landed in Season 2. To go from this lost, broken soul in Asgaard, and be given a second chance and learn so much about life that he actually gives himself to protect other people, has been such an honor.” For tickets to the conversation and Variety Virtuoso Award Presentation to Tom Hiddleston, visit here.

#tom hiddleston #miami film festival #virtuoso award

[slayingfiction]

Plotters VS. Pansters

Don’t forget our Grand Opening Giveaway starts February 1st/24 on Tumblr, Instagram and slayingfiction.com! You don’t want to miss it! Happy Writing!

In the world of writing, there are two types of creators often discussed: plotters and pantsers. These terms describe a writer’s approach to crafting stories. Whether you’re an aspiring author or a seasoned novelist, understanding these styles can offer valuable insights into your writing process. Let’s dive into what makes plotters and pantsers distinct and how each approach contributes to the

art of storytelling.

Plotters: Architects of the Written World

Plotters, often referred to as ‘architects,’ are writers who plan their stories meticulously before diving into the actual writing. They are the mapmakers of the writing world, charting out each twist and turn of their narrative.

Detailed Outlining: Plotters create extensive outlines, character profiles, and world-building elements before penning their first sentence.

Controlled Storytelling: This style lends itself to a controlled narrative with fewer inconsistencies and plot holes.

Time Investment: Plotting can be time-consuming initially, but it often makes the writing process smoother.

Famous Plotters: J.K. Rowling and John Grisham are notable plotters, known for their detailed story planning.

Pantsers: The Free Spirits of Storytelling

Pantsers, or ‘gardeners,’ as George R.R. Martin likes to call them, write ‘by the seat of their pants.’ They dive into writing with a general idea or none at all, discovering the story as they go along.

Spontaneous Creation: Pantsers often begin with a basic concept or character and let the story unfold naturally.

Flexible and Dynamic: This style allows for more flexibility, often leading to surprising and dynamic plot turns.

Adaptable Process: Pantsing can be less intimidating for some writers, as it doesn’t require extensive pre-planning.

Famous Pantsers: Stephen King and Margaret Atwood are known for their pantser style, crafting intricate stories with a more spontaneous approach.

Which Approach is Better?

The truth is, there’s no ‘better’ approach. Both plotters and pantsers have their strengths and challenges. Some writers are strict plotters or pantsers, while others fall somewhere in between, employing techniques from both styles.

1. Mix and Match: Many successful authors use a combination of plotting and pantsing. They may start with a rough outline but allow room for the story to evolve.

Personal Preference: The best method depends on what works for you as a writer. Experiment with both styles to find your comfort zone.

Genre Considerations: Some genres, like mystery or high fantasy, might benefit more from plotting due to their complex plots and world-building.

Conclusion

Whether you’re a plotter, a pantser, or somewhere in between, the most important thing is to keep writing. Each approach offers unique pathways to creativity, and understanding your own method can enhance your writing experience. Embrace your style, and let it guide you in your storytelling journey.

Remember, there’s no right or wrong way to write a story. The beauty of writing lies in the diversity of its creation.

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#creative writing #fiction #novel writing #pansters #plotter #writing #Writing advice #Writing community #Writing fiction #Writing reference #Writing resources #writing tips

[aurpiment]

OK, so first for this notion to work I need you to hold in your head, to rotate in your mind, the idea of a Karhidish localization or dub. A story is adopted for TV or radio in Karhide and certain details are tweaked to make it make more sense to Karhiders who’re not familiar with the many cultures of earth.

Concepts you’ve got to explain for the Aubreyad:

The napoleonic wars: big foray

A sailing vessel with a martial hierarchy: so these aren’t cargo vessels, they belong to the king or the emperor and they’re also fighting in the foray. Each vessel has a representative of the king who acts as king or emperor of the vessel. The vessels do not have an armored beak for ice, and it is punishable by death for workers to keep kemmer with other workers on board. With passengers, it’s ok, but only sometimes.

The status of women in 19th century Europe: so there’s this type of guy called a “woman” and basically his shifgrethor is not considered equivalent to that of a “man.” He does have shifgrethor but it is constructed differently. He must not keep kemmer with anyone without having vowed kemmer first. (Paradoxical, yes. Therefore the rule is not always followed—but there are social consequences to breaking it.) His financial status usually (but not always) depends on his kemmering’s status. His children are considered to belong to his kemmmering.

Stephen Maturin’s nasty fucked up wig: he needs this symbol to show people that he’s important and educated, but he’s an untidy, smelly person, so his hair-hat is in very poor condition

Jack Aubrey’s disastrous affairs: something physically wrong with him. It also makes him unable to bear children. But he’s not sad about this, because his kemmering’s children are considered to belong to him.

Stephen Maturin’s laudanum addiction: this is just a kemmerin-inhibitor. He takes it due to heartbreak. There are analgesic side effects also I guess.

Dueling: we also have this. This is the part that makes the most sense, actually.

#mt