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queen-haq · 11 months

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Fic: A Woman Reborn - Part 25 (final chapter)

Pairing: Billy Russo X Reader (from A Woman Scorned)

Rating: R / 18+ only

A/N: This is a sequel to A Woman Scorned and takes place a few years after the events of AWS.

MasterList (includes links to AWS and previous chapters here)

Summary: You and Billy are happily married when tragedy strikes, jeopardizing your relationship and everything you two have built together. Can the two of you find your way back to each other or is the special bond you once shared broken forever?

Chapter 25

It had been two weeks since you returned home, and there had not been any contact with Billy during that time. Every night you read his letter, and all it did was confuse you and leave you with conflicting feelings. You appreciated his apology for the immense pain he caused, and there were moments when you wished you could get past everything and give into your feelings - but those feelings subsided and you longed for space again.

You scanned your empty apartment, looking so vast now that all of your stuff had been removed. Not that you’d ever been attached to the kitchen, but it made you uneasy every time you remembered that bitch Dumont attacking you in it. This place was home for only a short time, but now it was tainted and you didn’t want to be here any longer. You needed a fresh start, and that’s why leaving the city was important.

You asked for time and space… I’ll give it to you.

Billy had promised that in the letter, and kept his word. Which made your last two days at the cabin with him even more significant. But then reality had reared its ugly head, and he decided it was safe to return to New York City. Fisk wasn’t after them, Dumont was dead, and Frank didn’t know about Billy’s part in Cerberus - there was no longer any reason to hide from the world.

Lights flickered on and off at the various apartments in the building across from yours. Taking a sip from your plastic solo cup, you wondered if he was out there watching you right now. He may have promised time and space but all that meant was that he’d keep his distance. It didn’t mean he wouldn’t keep tabs on you. It’s who Billy was, it was part of his obsessive nature, and a facet of him you loved.

“Are you okay?”

Davina’s voice cut through the haze of uncertainty clouding your mind. “I’m fine.”

“Are you excited about the trip?”

You turned around to face your friend. “Kinda.”

“I think some time away will do you good.”

“I know, me too.”

“If you still have left anything in the office, I can go pick it up.”

“No, it’s fine. I got everything I needed.”

“Can’t have been easy,” Davina remarked.

You bit your cheek, sighing. “It wasn’t, but it was time. Frank and Curtis have a good handle on things.”

“And did you see Billy there?”

Your stomach twisted into knots at the mention of his name. “No. He knew I was coming so he stayed away.”

“He knows you’re leaving the country?”

“I texted him after. Told him to meet me at the airport.”

Davina looked concerned. “Are you sure that’s a good idea?”

You shrugged your shoulders, your gaze wandering over to where your suitcases were packed. “I’m not going to let him change my mind.”

“I kinda wish he would. I hate that you’re leaving, I’m going to miss you so much.”

You sent Davina a grateful smile. “Me too. But I need to get away and just leave-”

“-all this behind,” she finished for you. “I get it, you’ve been through a lot of shit in the past few years. You need a break.”

“I need a new life.”

“Hey, you might end up meeting some hottie on your new adventures that’ll change your life.”

You chuckled. That was Davina, eternal optimist. “Yeah, sure.”

The two of you finished your drinks and started doing a final check of the apartment before returning the keys.

***

You glanced down at your phone. An hour and a half hour before your flight. You were already checked in and your luggage dropped off, but you still had to go through security and it was a madhouse at the airport. Would Billy come? You didn’t know, but it was time to stop stalling. You scanned the area one last time before heading towards the security gate. It was only when you were close to the entrance that you spotted Billy. He was staring at you, watching you intently like he had a habit of doing. Your heart drummed, your stomach quivering. A part of you wanted to run to him, to abandon your plans and just lose yourself in his arms – but you couldn’t.

As you drew closer, you noted his heated glance. The scars on his face should have marred his good looks but instead he looked rugged, his imperfections making him even hotter. Billy was dressed in a charcoal grey suit with a crisp blue shirt underneath, his hands tucked into his pockets. Finally you came to a stop in front of him, ensuring there was enough distance between you two. Jaw clenched, he studied you with a burning intensity.

“So this is it. You’re leaving,” he finally spoke.

“I need to.”

“You want to,” he argued.

To anyone else his current tone would have reeked of contempt and hate, but you saw right through the façade and into the heart of a man who was hurt and afraid, a man desperate to love you. His body was taut with tension, anger screaming in his eyes, demanding your full attention.

“You don’t have to run to the other side of the world to get away from me. I promised you I’d leave you alone. I meant it.”

“Not sure I could stay away,” you confessed.

Hope flashed in his eyes for a fleeting moment. “You don’t have to.”

The lump in your throat hurt, your heart aching. “I do, Billy, I need to put space between us. I need to know that I can live in this world without you, that I can be happy.”

“You want to forget me,” he accused, his voice cracking. “Move on like I mean nothing to you.”

Unable to take the pain in his gaze, you lowered your eyes. “Maybe this could be a good thing for you too. Maybe you can-”

“What? Be the guy I was before I met you? The same guy who used to fuck everything that moved?”

It made you sick to your stomach to think of him with someone else. You gritted your teeth instinctively, glaring up at him.

Suddenly he stepped forward, narrowing the distance between you. His dark, molten eyes swept over your face, inhaling you in and consuming every inch of you with every breath. “You don’t like that, do you? Pisses you off, right? Me fucking other women?”

“Do whatever you want.”

“You’re who I want.” The intensity in his voice was intoxicating, his words tugging you towards him just as much as his hand that wrapped around your waist. “There’s no one else for me. Only you. And it’s fucking selfish of me, I know, but I don’t wanna be who I was before you.”

“You were happy then. Things were easier.”

“Fuck that!” He bent forward to lower himself to your height. “I was numb before you. You made me strong, you made me fucking feel. You’re in my blood and I’m never giving that up!”

“The last few years have been hell, Billy.” Tears stung the back of your eyes, you sniffled. “For both of us.”

“And we’re still here!” he said ferociously. “We still love each other even if you can’t say it. I’d destroy the fucking world for you and you’d do the same.”

“Too much has happened,” you whispered. “I need space-”

“I kept my distance, didn’t I? I fucking hate it but I’ve been staying away.” His other hand cradled your face, thumb swiping over your bottom lip as his gaze bore into you. “Don’t leave. Stay here. We don’t have to be together, but I need to know you’re okay.”

“I can still feel you around me, Billy. You’re always watching me and I can sense it, even though you’re good at hiding yourself.” You exhaled a short breath, your fingers quivering as you traced the scars on his face. “I’m weak when it comes to you. If you’re close by, I’ll run to you.”

Hurt flitted across his face. “And you don’t want that.”

“I’m still getting over everything that happened,” you admitted. “It’s too raw, that pain is still fresh. And ignoring it isn’t gonna help me, I know that. It’ll just make me hate myself more.”

Vibrating with emotion, he leaned closer to rest his forehead on your temple. “I don’t want that for you.”

“I know,” you signed, closing your eyes. You breathed him in, noting the new subtleties of the cologne he was wearing. You were familiar with his favourites but this was something new, not associated with notes that triggered memories of happier times.

There was chaos all around, crowds of people mulling around the airport but it didn’t seem to touch you and Billy. The two of you were in your own world, isolated from others.

“When I was in college I’d hear stories about people travelling through Europe, or going to Thailand and sleeping on the beach. Just getting away and having meaningful experiences, you know? I always wanted to go try something like that but back then I could never afford to travel.”

His fingers glided through your hair before fisting the strands, holding you tightly against him.

“I missed out on so many things because I was always too busy hustling.”

“Me too,” Billy admitted. “Growing up poor does that to you.”

“Now I actually have time to do this, and I want to take advantage of it. I want to do things I’ve never done before.”

“I could go with you,” he offered hesitantly.

“Then this whole trip would be about us, not me. I need this for myself, Billy.”

He exhaled a resigned sigh, hugging you. For a long time the two of you remained in each other’s arms, clinging to each other.

“You’ll come back to me?” he asked after a long while.

You didn’t want to give him false hope, you loved him too much for that. “I don’t know.”

His arms tensed, you felt his internal struggle to let you leave whilst growing desperate to hold on to you. He was in agony, his soul crying out to you.

“I love you. I always will.” His words weren’t tender nor gentle. No, they were immersed in rage and grief and loss and complete despair. He pulled away from you, his eyes red with tears while he reached into his pocket to retrieve something. You stared down at his palm, staring at the familiar jewelry box, one you thought was still locked away in your dresser. He snapped it open. You hadn’t realized it was missing yet there used to be a time when the engagement ring and wedding band were gilded around your finger. He gripped your hand with his own, thrusting the box into your palm, squeezing your joined hands together. “We own each other and that’s never gonna change. Doesn’t matter if you’re here or a million fucking miles away.” Lips pursed into a thin, angry line, he glowered at you. “Do whatever you have to, but next time I see you I’m putting this back on your finger whether you want it or not.” Eyes fixed on you, he shut the lid close and returned the jewelry case back into his pocket.

Without another word he turned around and stormed away, leaving you with your heart lurching and your stomach in coils.

After he disappeared from your line of sight, you took a deep breath and headed for security.

*****

It wasn’t easy at first. You were a woman traveling alone, going to places that weren’t necessarily the safest. But eventually you managed to navigate your way through unfamiliar surroundings, be cautious and blend into crowds so that you didn’t stand out as a tourist. You learned to listen to your instincts but also put your guard down a little so you could enjoy yourself. You were always great at schmoozing so that skill came in handy when you met people from various sectors of life. You hung out with locals and tourists alike, and immersed yourself in the art and culture each country had to offer.

Days went by in a whirl; you were enraptured by the beauty of it all. Despite that, there was a hollow ache in your chest that never seemed to subside. It pricked at you when you were admiring Ophelia at the museum, or surrounded by stunning elegance of the Blue Mosque, or even when you were sitting with a group of people laughing and chatting. You even volunteered in some places, more to keep yourself busy than necessity. You were comfortable with your everyday life, maybe even happy, but your heart yearned for something more.

The days turned to weeks turned to months. In the blink of an eye, six months passed by. Maybe it was the wariness from long days of travel or simple stupidity on your part, but you grew complacent about safety when you were walking back to your hotel one night and were attacked.

The man tried to grab your purse, you put up a fight, and he started kicking you when suddenly a large dog came out of nowhere and jumped up at him. You stumbled onto the ground, dazed, watching after the robber while he fled. You glanced at the dog. Seconds ago he was a growling predator and now he was sniffing your feet. He only had one eye and was ugly as hell but the damn mutt had just saved your life so the least you could do was feed him. As if reading your mind, the beast followed you back to your hotel.

A month after that night, you started the paperwork required to adopt the animal. It was a difficult and expensive process, and for the first time in recent weeks you started worrying about finances. The money you’d allocated for the trip had been carefully budgeted, but spending so much on vet bills and administrative costs wasn’t something you had accounted for.

A week ago your bank balance was half of where it should have been before the beast came into your life. Tonight, your balance had been restored to its original amount. Someone had deposited a lot of money, and you knew exactly who it was.

Billy. The missing piece of your soul. Yet you hadn’t reached out to him in months, your fear stronger than your desire. But there was no way you could ignore this kind gesture.

Your heart was pounding in your chest when you dialed Billy’s number. There was a seven hour difference between your time zone and his. You were disappointed when he didn’t pick up, he was probably at work, you consoled yourself with the idea that this was probably for the best.

Later that night you were in bed with the beast sleeping on the floor when the phone rang. You picked it up haphazardly, half-asleep. “Hmm?” you mumbled.

“You called?”

Billy’s voice was a sudden jolt to your system, knocking you awake. Anxiety surged through you. You felt shy all of a sudden, almost embarrassed to speak to him. “Hi.”

There was a pause on his end. “Hi.”

“You deposited money into my account.”

“I did.”

“Thanks.” You bit down on your bottom lip. “You didn’t have to do that.”

“I know.”

“I guess this means you have someone keeping track of my account?”

His tone took on a defensive edge. “I have to, don’t I? Not like you’d call me when you need something.”

The silence was palpable, filled with tension. It saddened you, knowing there was a time the two of you could talk for hours on end and now you could barely exchange a word with civility.

Minutes passed, the stillness grew. Yet you didn’t hang up, neither did he, the sound of your breaths supplementing the static in the call.

Billy was the first to break the silence. “I went on a date.”

It was the last thing you wanted to hear. His words were so rage inducing you wanted to scream, to stomp on your phone over and over again. You reminded yourself there was nothing wrong with what he was doing, he had every right to see other people. You hadn’t even promised to come back to New York. For all intents and purposes the two of you were done, but-

-but there was that potent jealousy rushing through your fucking nerves, ready to destroy Billy and his other bitch. “Fuck you!”

He sounded smug when he spoke next, even happy. “She reminded me of you, so I asked her out.” Billy was needling you on purpose. “Wanna know how it went?”

“You fucked her,” you seethed, gritting your teeth.

“No. I didn’t.”

“Why not?”

The vulnerability in his voice took you by surprise considering he was acting so smug mere seconds ago. “Because I didn’t want her. I wanted to want her, but I fucking didn’t.”

“Because I’ve never been your type.”

“Because she wasn’t you.”

Billy had never been one to wax poetic about love or romance, but it was these rare moments when he was completely earnest that made your heart melt.

“You’re the only fucking woman I want.”

“I miss you.” You hadn’t intended to say it, not to him. Because admitting that meant exposing yourself, opening up your heart again, to him. Having hope when you should have known better. But now those carefully guarded emotions were out there and you couldn’t pretend they weren’t.

His voice was hoarse, ensconced in pain. “Say it again.”

You took a deep breath. “I miss you.”

“You sound fucking terrified.”

“Because I am.”

He exhaled a resigned sigh. “Do you mean it?”

“Yes,” you confessed.

There was a pregnant pause. “You’ll come back to me?”

There was that question again. The answer he wanted meant trusting him and risk getting your heart broken again, something you were still terrified of a few months ago when he’d asked you at the airport.

The fear was still there, that was undeniable, but there was also something else that was just as intense – hope, and a desire to make things work that hadn’t existed before. “Yes.”

“For good.” It wasn’t a question, but a statement. Filled with so much joy and relief and pure happiness, the strain gone. “When?”

“Not yet,” you answered. “But soon.”

“I’ll wait. I’ll wait as long as it takes. But I need something from you, babe.” With no need to restrain himself any longer his voice grew velvety, reverberating with sexual energy. “I need to see that pretty pussy of yours.”

Immediately your body responded to his words, aching to have his mouth between your legs and going down on you. “Billy-”

“I get so hard just thinking of you. And I’ll probably get too excited when I see your sweet wet cunt but I need to, sweetheart, I need to look at you and taste you and smell you. I want to be inside you so badly… fuck… see you take my cock in, feel you squeeze me so tight…”

You moaned, you couldn’t help it, and so did he – the sound of his guttural groan so hot and sexy it instantly drove you wild.

Oh god. You could hear him, the throaty growls of pleasure from him jerking off to your voice. He was a vocal man during sex, always had been. And you fucking loved it. You missed it. You missed him.

And it was a huge relief to finally give yourself permission to admit that. Yeah he hurt you badly, and you did what you always did and hurt him back. Despite all that there were real feelings there, a true bond that connected the two of you intimately. No doubt you could be content without him but with him you could be happy. There was so much joy and wonder in the world and you wanted to share that with him.

“You have any idea what you fucking do to me?” he rasped.

“No. Tell me.”

There was a slight pause on his end, like your words took him by surprise. “You’re a goddamn tease, sugar.”

You smiled. “But you like that, don’t you? You like it when I’m on top and in full control. When I’m grinding down on your cock, Billy, teasing you with my pussy-”

There was that groan again, a raw sound of pleasure and frustration that hit just right.

“You remember the first time we had sex, Billy?”

“In the alley next to Piatti’s.”

You rolled your eyes. “That wasn’t our first time.”

“I remember it like it happened yesterday. I crashed your date with Roger and you were pissed at me.”

“It wasn’t a date-” You stopped yourself, refusing to argue with him about this. “It was the night you took me to the ballet.”

“That doesn’t count.”

“Why not?”

“It was before the gala.”

“So?”

“I didn’t know the real you then.”

That was the thing with Billy. One minute he would frustrate you so much and the next he would say something so tender that you fell in love all over again. “It still counts,” you murmured.

“It doesn’t.”

“It was like our third or fourth date, I figured it was time we slept together. I was more nervous than excited-”

“Gee, thanks,” he muttered sarcastically.

“We went to the ballet but I couldn’t figure out why you even took me there. You looked so bored during it.”

“I hated that shit, thought you’d be into it.”

“Liar. You took all your dates there, I checked your credit card transactions the next morning.”

“Oh, that’s when you started hacking into my shit?”

You chuckled. “Wasn’t planning to. Just didn’t expect the sex to be so great.”

“Yeah?” You could practically see the arrogant grin on his face. “I got you all cock-crazy, huh?”

“Something like that.” You bit down on your lip, recalling the memories so clearly in your mind. Before then no guy had ever made you come, and Billy had done it multiple times that night. He had blown your mind in every way imaginable, marking the beginning of your obsession with him.

“Is that why you fell for me? ‘cause I fucked you good?”

While a ‘yes’ would’ve been an ego boost, you also saw through the façade of his seemingly casual tone. He wouldn’t like the foundation of your relationship to be a sexual one. Besides, it wasn’t true. “No, it was when I realized how alike you and I were. There was a side you showed to the world, then there was the real you, and they were polar opposites. I used to think I was the only one who acted that way.”

“You saw me for who I really was.”

You nodded your head instinctively. “Yeah.”

“And I saw you. I knew I was fucked from that night of the gala.”

“Bullshit,” you retorted.

“What? You don’t believe me?”

“You didn’t like me until way after.”

“Wrong,” he countered dryly. “That night was definitely the first time I caught feelings. And then every day after that I got sucked in more and more. Every time I thought I had you all figured out you surprised me. And I fell harder every time.”

You didn’t speak, simply digesting his words.

“My mother’s funeral, you remember that?” he prodded.

“Yeah.”

“I was all kinds of messed up that day and you were there for me, you didn’t leave. I thought that was it, you know. How I felt that day, that would be the extent of it. I was already head over heels. It couldn’t get more serious than that. Then I found you with Adam Preston.” A soft chuckle escaped him. “I had no fucking idea what I was in for.”

“You had your chance to leave. I told you not to get involved.”

Billy snickered. “Like I was gonna walk away after that.”

You pondered how major milestones in your relationship were built on a path of blood and violence. Adam. Roger. Even fucking Krista. Destroying them was what propelled the two of you closer. Would it always be like that? Or would you both grow out of it?

“What are you thinking about?” he probed.

“A normal life. You think that’s possible for us?”

“Is that what you want?”

You turned to your side. “I want you.”

There was a long bout of silence that followed. “Haven’t heard that from you in a long time,” Billy said.

“I know.”

“You left, Y/N. It’s been months!” His voice took on a harsh edge. “I haven’t seen you, haven’t talked to you. You have any idea what it’s been like without you? You’re out there living your goddamn life and I can’t even fucking breathe without you! Do you give a fuck about that?”

You reminded yourself to be patient. “I get that you’re pissed off-”

“You’re goddamn right I am!”

“But I’m not going to fucking apologize, Billy.” You stayed calm, refusing to let him rile you up. “I needed space, away from you, away from New York, away from everything that happened in the last few years.” You exhaled a deep sigh. “It’s been peaceful. I’m content. I’ve done things and travelled to places I never thought I’d get a chance to. And you know what doing that made me realize?” Your tone softened. “That I want to be with you. Billy, you make me happy.”

It was impossible to know but you sensed him trembling, as if your confession had expelled a rush of relief over him. He didn’t speak for a long time. Neither did you.

“When you come home to me, it’ll be for good. I’m never letting you go,” he declared.

“I know.”

There was a lull in the conversation again, a comfortable one this time.

“So? What’s been the best thing you’ve seen so far?” Billy asked. “What’s the shittiest?”

You smiled fondly, getting ready to tell him about your adventures.

***

Two Months Later

The elevator doors opened right into Billy’s apartment. You entered his place, greeted by the sleek, sparse aesthetic of the place. His design preferences clashed with yours and that hadn’t changed. The beast was next to you, tugging at his leash as he was eager to discover his new surroundings. You dropped your overnight bag on the ground before undoing his leash.

Sonia had given you the code to Billy’s apartment but had warned you that he wasn’t expected home for a few days. You weren’t supposed to be back in New York for at least a few more weeks, but you were feeling homesick and both you and the beast were exhausted so you decided to return early. Unfortunately your plan to surprise Billy didn’t work out as expected as he was off somewhere doing recon work for a lucrative client along with Frank and some other team members.

You had landed yesterday and gone straight to Davina’s, spending it resting and catching up with your best friend. Still, you were exhausted and the beast was acting up – maybe it was a good thing Billy wasn’t here. But that didn’t stop you from being utterly disappointed at missing him. Over the past few months you and he spoke practically every day despite the time differences, and the connection between you had grown stronger, more intense. The need to see him was overwhelming, the desire to touch him so desperate that you dreamt about him every day.

The beast ran around while you took a tour of the penthouse suite, familiarizing yourself with Billy’s new home. You rummaged through his closet, running your fingers through his clothes, admiring his wardrobe. You always loved how much pride he took in dressing well, and he was just as appreciative about your efforts.

Your attention was drawn to the watches laid out in a bougie cabinet that was new to you. The vintage Rolex you’d gifted him for your second anniversary was prominently displayed, a centerpiece amongst his collection. A part of you had worried that Billy had sold the piece after the divorce but that didn’t appear to be the case. You opened the bottom drawer and found a familiar velvet jewelry box in there.

“Next time I see you I’m putting this back on your finger whether you want it or not.”

Billy’s words echoed in your mind like it was yesterday. Your stomach fluttered when you opened the box to find your engagement ring and wedding band in there. Smiling, you slid them onto your finger. The fit was a little snug, you had gained a few pounds during the trip, but the rings still looked beautiful on your hand.

You noted the empty side of the walk-in closet, along with a large built-in cabinet designed specifically for shoes. This was meant for you, no doubt, and it made you feel soft and warm inside.

Home. That was what Billy was to you, and it felt right.

***

Billy dried himself with a towel before getting dressed in a t-shirt and sweats. All the while the mutt simply watched him, idly chewing on a recent pair of shoes Billy had bought. He took a deep breath, reminding himself he could get another pair. When he’d come home sooner than expected, the last thing he’d expected to find was you sleeping on the couch and a giant monster snoring on the floor beside you. The dog eventually woke up while he took a shower and now there they were, playing a game of who could stare at each other the longest.

Billy knelt down to meet the mutt at eye-level. “You know she’s mine, right? You can’t have her.”

The dumb dog stared back with its one eye, wearing an insolent expression, and then it yawned, completely unfazed by the warning. Billy pet the dog’s head before standing up and exiting the room, shutting the door behind him.

You were still sleeping soundly on the couch. Dressed in one of his t-shirts, the hem twisted around your hips, your gorgeous legs were naked and begging to be touched. And then there was the flash of your black lace panties. He poured himself a glass of whiskey and downed the whole thing before taking a seat next to you.

It was almost eight months since he saw you last, since he touched you. His fingers wrapped around your bare calf and squeezed lightly. You moaned a little, the sound turning him on even more. Billy told himself to be patient but all rational thoughts left his head when you shifted and the t-shirt rose even higher. Mesmerized, his hand travelled up your thigh, dancing along your soft, supple skin, sneaking higher and higher until his fingers hooked inside the waistband of your panties and he pulled the fabric down the length of your legs. Yeah he wanted to fuck you senseless, but more than that he just wanted to hold you and revere you.

And so he did, with his gaze, inhaling you in.

Your beautiful body, your pretty pussy, your glorious tits.

He committed every inch of your sweet cunt to his brain, inhaling you in. He didn’t even have to touch you for you to get wet, you were turned on already when he bent down to kiss your delicate skin. You trembled against him, your body quivered. You weren’t fully awake yet, your eyes still closed, but your breathed out a moan when he swiped his tongue along your folds.

God, he missed you. Your scent, your taste.

Pushing your t-shirt up above your chest, he sunk his face into the soft curves of your stomach, his tongue delving into your belly button. Your hip arched up, causing his face to smash against your skin. He chuckled, continuing to lick his way up your body until he came to your breasts.

Fuck.

The sheer hotness of your breasts stole his breath. They were bigger than he remembered, softer, as he cupped them together. Your puffy nipples stared back at him defiantly, daring him to fuck them, and he couldn’t stop himself anymore. His mouth dragged over the hardened nubs, going back and forth between, sucking on them like a man dying for water.

You were awake now, your moans growing louder, your body writhing under him while your legs tightened around his waist.

“Billy…”

Your voice. It was the only thing that could draw him back from the brink of madness he was in. Pulling his mouth away from your right nipple, he finally met your gaze. And the expression on your face melted his heart.

Overwhelmed with feelings that rushed through him, he stared at you blankly. He couldn’t think.

You were here. You came back to him.

You were his.

The emotions on your face, the way your eyes lit up so brightly - it made his insides ache.

For months he was a dead man walking, going through life without any hope or excitement. He’d always known losing you would ruin him but even he couldn’t have predicted how alone and hopeless it would feel without you. The ambitious drive in him dissipated, because what was the fucking point of money if he couldn’t spend it with you. The first month after you left all he did was get wasted. Alcohol was supposed to numb the pain but it didn’t. After weeks of fucking around Frank and Curtis had enough and ordered him back to work. Sick of the fights and waking up with hangovers, he decided work would be a better distraction. At least then he wouldn’t have to deal with Frank bitching at him.

Shortly after that you guys started talking, and the world came alive for him. Life was beautiful again, and he had a reason to wake up every morning. His drive to make Anvil an industry leader returned with a vengeance along with the desire to destroy anyone who stood in his way. All because of you.

Your index finger traced the scars on his face, your every touch a thorough reminder of how much you meant to him.

And then he saw the rings around your finger.

The engagement ring he’d scoured for months before he finally found the right one. The wedding bands you guys exchanged. His own was destroyed when his fucking world fell apart, but he’d held onto yours, resolute in his determination to put them on you again.

And now you were wearing them, on your own, without any kind of cajoling from him.

Because you were ready to be his finally.

Every night he pondered what he’d say when he saw you again. In his imagination he was a fucking poet, ready to impress with heartfelt declarations about how much you meant to him. Except now when you were actually in front of him, he was speechless. The only thing running through his head was fear. Fear that this was just a fucking dream. And instead of coming at you from a place of love, it was his fucking insecurity that drove his words.

“You’re never leaving me again.”

He expected you to be irritated or angry by his threat, instead you sent him an affectionate smile. Your hand brushed through his hair strands in a placating gesture. “Don’t be an asshole again.”

Heart full, he fisted the back of your head and pulled you close.

A heartbeat, that’s all it fucking took for the both of you to lose control. Your mouth closed over his, and he gave into the fucking whirlwind of craziness only you made him feel.

***

You felt Billy slide onto the couch behind you, scooting closer so he could resume touching you. As his hand trailed down your back, your body tingled again with excitement. He’d fucked you multiple times yet the two of you couldn’t get enough, your body wasn’t sated despite being utterly exhausted. Even now when you were in the brink of sleep, his close proximity was playing havoc with your thoughts, especially when you felt him caressing your ass. The weight you had gained during your vacation seemed to have gone to your butt, and apparently Billy loved it.

He dropped playful kisses on both cheeks, squeezing one and then the other with his palm.

“You were never an ass man before,” you remarked lazily, yawning.

“Yeah, but this ass is fucking piece of art.” The playful tap he gave your cheeks made you giggle. “And so is the rest of this gorgeous body.” His tongue trailed a path up. “Like the small of your back.” His beard scratched your skin as his mouth followed up the length of your spine. “And your spine.”

You chuckled. “Spine too?”

More kisses peppered the back of your neck before he turned you around. “And these shoulders… this neck…” His face sunk into your chest as he cupped your breasts together.

“Nothing to say about my boobs?” you teased.

“Hmm…”

Already mesmerized, his fingers danced across your nipples.

As he stared at your breasts, you stared at him, studying him. He was on his side, balanced on his elbow, and looked so deliriously happy that it made your heart explode. You hadn’t seen him like this in a long time, years actually. Before you left he was always agitated and in a constant state of turmoil, but now there was a look of contentment on his face, a calmness in him that was only present before the accident.

“Checking me out?” he teased, winking at you.

“Always.” You smiled, reaching up to palm his face. “You look happy.”

He placed a tender kiss on the flesh of your palm. “Cause you’re here.” He kissed your wedding band. “Back with me, where you belong.” Closing his eyes, he stilled for a few seconds. “I can breathe again.”

Your heart beat rapidly in your chest, like it always did when he regarded you with so much love and tenderness. “I didn’t think we’d ever be like this again. I was ready to walk away forever.”

His gaze darkened, like the thought of you even verbalizing those words angered him. “You’re mine. And if you think I’m gonna let you--”

You placed your palm over his mouth to shut him up. “I’m here for good.”

Billy didn’t respond, his piercing eyes holding you hostage. Sensing his anxiety, you pulled him close to your chest so his head was pressed in the crook of your neck. With his body settled atop, the two of you clung to each other in a tight embrace for a long while. “I have a gift for you. It’s in the other room.”

“Yeah,” he replied in a wry tone. “I met the gift. It was eating my shoes.”

You chuckled. “He has good taste.”

“It can’t live with us, babe.”

“Bold of you to assume I’m moving in.”

“Bold of you to think you have a choice.”

You smiled, languidly playing with his hair. “I’m not moving in without the beast. He goes where I go.”

“Beast? That’s what you named him?”

“No, he has an actual name. He just won’t respond to it.”

“What is it?”

“Ludacris.”

“Like the rapper?”

“Yeah, I like his music.”

Billy snickered. “No wonder he likes beast better.” He pressed a kiss to the hollow of your throat. “You’re not allowed to love that mutt more than me,” he drawled, his tone unconcerned and lazy.

“Even though he saved my life?” you teased.

“Even then.”

“Fine,” you sighed. “I need to go walk him.”

“No,” Billy groaned, burrowing his head into your chest so his facial hair tickled you.

“Stop!” you giggled.

“Can’t go,” he insisted, ticking you harder. “Not gonna let you.”

Your squealing must have woken up the beast because he came running into the room. Except instead of attacking Billy, he started licking him, especially when Billy started scratching his sweet spot. You watched the two of them bond, and your heart swelled with happiness. Dogs weren’t exactly Billy’s thing and you expected him to protest against keeping him, but there he was, playing with him.

“I need to get food for this one,” you said, sitting up.

Billy turned back to look at you. “I bought some a few weeks ago. Wasn’t sure what he’d like so I got a few different kinds.”

Your smile grew soft. Some of your conversations with Billy in the past month did involve the beast but you’d never mentioned you were planning to bring him home. Obviously he recognized you wouldn’t be leaving the dog behind.

You pushed yourself off the couch when he grabbed your hand.

“I’ll take Beast for a walk,” Billy offered. “You get some sleep.”

“I’m not tired.”

His eyebrow quirked up. “Good. ‘cause I’m not done with that ass yet.”

You laughed, reaching down to give him a kiss.

***

A while after you took a shower and put a slip on, you sifted through your overnight bag to retrieve your gift for him. When you sauntered into the kitchen, you found Beast on the floor, wolfing down his food, while Billy made grilled cheese sandwiches on the stove. It smelled delicious and your stomach growled in hunger. Smiling, you crept up and hugged him from behind. “Have something for you.”

His free hand snaked around your waist to grab your ass. “Besides this?” He turned off the stove before turning around in your arms. “Why the fuck are you dressed?”

“Because I’m hungry.” Retreating until your back hit the cabinet, you jumped up to sit on the counter. You set his gift behind your back, smiling at him.

He plated the sandwich and handed it to you before making a quick stop at the fridge to grab himself and you a beer. Your cooking skills had somehow grown worse, but his seemed to have excelled, especially his version of a grilled-cheese sandwich. Pleased that he remembered this was one of your favourite late-night snacks, you happily bit into the sandwich while he drank his beer and watched you eat. There were many a nights like this during your marriage, where you’d be sharing a bottle of wine or drinks in the kitchen, Billy cooking, you perched up on the counter and keeping him company. It felt like home, being here, even though it was a new place, and everything was so different, and Beast was making a ruckus in one corner of the kitchen.

Billy’s eyes were fixated on you as he took a sip of the beer, his gaze trailing from your lips to your breasts, down the length of your body before drifting up to your face again. “You don’t need clothes to eat,” he finally responded, eyes darkening again.

“So you want me to sit here, naked, just ready to do your bidding?” you taunted. You straightened your leg to reach across and touch Billy’s groin, teasing your foot along the fabric of his jeans.

Molten eyes burned with intensity, his gaze bore into you.

He was hard, you felt it, could see it, wet heat pooling between your legs at the sexual magnetism vibrating off of him right now.

“Take off your goddamn clothes, sweetheart.”

You smirked, setting the empty plate aside. A few months ago, you would have hesitated to get naked in front of him. The deterioration of your relationship had left you emotionally scarred, broken, and too insecure to let yourself be vulnerable with him. But now, you felt strong and healthy. Like yourself, though even more powerful. And so, despite the additional pounds you gained that once would have made you shirk and cringe, you took off your top and threw it aside. No bra, no intentional maneuvering to highlight your assets and minimize your flaws. None of that. You were simply naked and exposed in front of the only man who could break you. Except he was admiring you in all your glory, sheer desire on his face, his eyes glazing over at your full breasts.

“Come here, Billy.”

That seemed to snap him out of his daze. He closed the distance instantly, pulling your legs forward to wrap them around his thighs. All thoughts of provoking him left your brain as his mouth closed over yours, ravaging you, while you pulled at his clothes to undress him.

And soon he was thrusting inside of you, pounding you on the counter as your moans filled the room.

You forgot how utterly emotional and transfixing it was to have Billy inside of you. Your walls clenched around his cock while he thrust hard, every part of your body inhabited by him so that there was no you or him, just one body linked together while the two of you fucked each other into oblivion.

Your nails clawed his back, his teeth sunk into your shoulder, wounds marking each other’s bodies with reminders of what the two of you meant to each other. Pain and pleasure, forever entwined.

The harder he fucked you, the more vocal you became. Somewhere in the back of your mind you knew Beast was barking loudly but you were too entrenched in Billy to pay any attention to reality. It was only after you reached your frenzied climax that Beast’s howls finally registered.

“It’s okay, baby,” you cooed at Beast, breathless and panting, still perched on the counter, your body limber and fluid in Billy’s grip.

“No, absolutely fucking not,” Billy muttered, his head buried in your neck. “You only call me baby. No one else.”

“You can’t be jealous over a dog.”

“Can’t I?”

You chuckled, amused, and then murmured sweet terms of affections to cajole him.

It took a while for your hearts to return to normal pace, both of you spent, his body weight pressed onto you while you clung to him. Still a bit dazed, you dropped a kiss on his temple. “We can’t fuck in front of Beast.”

Billy shifted slightly to look at the dog, who was staring back with a hungry expression even though he just ate. “He needs to get used to this.”

“It’s weird, isn’t it?” you mused. “Having sex in front of a dog?”

“We fucked at a sex club in front of an audience. This is fine.”

You rolled your eyes. “That was different.”

“Yeah, the dog can’t talk.”

Smiling, you pulled on his earlobe. “Jerk.”

“Still waiting for my gift, babe.”

You twisted around to see where it had shifted to. Snuggled behind the bottle of olive oil, you retrieved the sachet.

“What is it?” Billy asked, eyeing the small bag.

You loosened the opening and dropped the ring on your palm.

Billy’s wedding band, a brilliant silver band that matched your own, had to be cut from his fingers before the life-saving operation he received. Since the two of you reconnected over the phone he’d mentioned how much the loss of it troubled him. While the two of you were certainly not ready for marriage, you still wanted to give him something that showed how far you’d come. It took you a while to find the perfect ring, in the end it was a two-toned black titanium ring in a jewelry shop in Turkey that captured your attention. The design was a black ring, contrasted with a silver bevelled edge, representing the history you shared and the future that was to come. Although it certainly wasn’t as expensive as the original, you liked its sleek, sexy design and you hoped Billy would too.

“You like it?” you asked hesitantly, feeling suddenly nervous. You reminded yourself the ring didn’t have to symbolize anything. It could just be a gift, if that’s what Billy wanted, and not mean anything. “If you don’t, it’s okay.”

He picked it up, his face devoid of emotion. “You proposing?”

“No, it’s just a gift.”

His gaze shifted to focus on you. “I want a fucking proposal, sugar.”

You rolled your eyes in exasperation. “It’s too soon. We’re not even fully back together.”

Eyebrow quirked up, he leveled you with a heated stare. “You’re not getting out of this.” He removed your wedding band and handed back the ring you gifted him. “We’re gonna put these on each other.” And he did just that, sliding the wedding band back onto your finger. “Your turn.” He splayed his hand in front of you.

Smiling, you took his hand and caressed his palm. His fingers trembled, surprising you, and you looked up to meet his eyes. The gravity of emotions in them made your heart flutter. Swallowing the unexpected lump in your throat, you slid the band onto his left ring finger.

Interlacing his fingers through yours, he pressed his forehead to yours. “You’re mine. I’m yours. Nothing ever comes between us.”

Just then Beast barked, as if offended by the words, and you burst into laughter. “Think he feels left out?”

“That’s his problem.”

You chuckled, turning your attention back to Billy. “You love him already. Admit it.”

He shook his head ‘no’. “I’ll tolerate him for you.” His lips grazed your forehead. “Because I love you.”

For the first time since the accident, those words didn’t incite anger or disbelief or any insecurity in you. Instead, you believed him wholeheartedly and felt it with every fiber in your being. “I love you too, Billy.”

“You haven’t said that in a long time.”

“I couldn’t. Not until now.”

His eyes glimmered with hope, with love, with all kinds of emotions that made your heart want to explode. “I’m never letting you go, babe.”

Overwhelmed with feelings, your eyes watered. This was the man you loved - insanely jealous and madly possessive, invading your entire life and crushing through every walls you’d built around your heart. The same man who bought groceries because you hated doing it, took space out of his beloved closet so it could hold your precious shoes, and was now even willing to take care of your dog even though he didn’t like animals.

Billy loved you, protected you. Killed for you. And you did the same for him.

What the two of you shared wasn’t normal or healthy. Loving each other didn’t make you better people, but it gave you both purpose, a reason to fight for something more substantial than simply survival. You filled each other’s lives with hope and happiness, a rarity for the both of you.

Cradling his face, you kissed him gently. Even after everything, you found your way back to each other.

That was never going to change, and you had no regrets.

He was yours. You were his.

Forever.

The End.

A/N - Thank you to all those who stuck around and to those who recently discovered the fic. I can’t believe I finished them both - lol - but I was so genuinely attached to Billy/Reader that I couldn’t let them go. But it’s time now, I think.

Billy and Reader will always have a complicated relationship, but they have each other’s back and will never feel as strongly about anyone else as they do each other. I sincerely believe that and I hope the writing showed that as well.

There are some scenes deliberately vague or I’ve glossed over, mostly because it allows me to delve into them in the future if I choose :)

Anyway, thank you again. I really appreciate and am grateful to every one of you.

If you’d be so inclined, I’d love to read any comments you want to share :)

#billy russo x reader #billy russo #ben barnes #the punisher #a woman reborn #a woman scorned universe #my fics

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queen-haq · 2 years

Text

Fic: A Woman Reborn - Part 23

Pairing: Billy Russo X Reader (from A Woman Scorned)

Rating: R / 18+ only

A/N: This is a sequel to A Woman Scorned and takes place a few years after the events of AWS.

MasterList (includes links to AWS and previous chapters here)

PART 23

The horror movie on Netflix wasn’t half-bad but your attention was fixated on Billy. He was on the ground, doing push-ups, back muscles flexing with every contraction, skin glistening with sweat. While you watched him he watched the screen, and it was starting to piss you off.

Four days the two of you had been stuck in the cabin, trapped in the middle of nowhere, with nothing to do. While you and Billy had done the rustic cabin thing before, it had always been on weekends – and the two of you spent most of it having sex. But this wasn’t a vacation, and there was no sex. Billy kept his distance, you were still physically recovering, and the only physical contact that happened was when the two of you inadvertently clung to each other in your sleep.

If ever you harbored any illusions about living a simple life in the middle of nowhere, the last few days had broken it. You were a city girl through and through. You liked the fast pace, the chaos of the crowds, living in a city filled with people from all parts of the world. You liked the rush of a demanding career and living the life you struggled so hard to build. And you knew without a doubt Billy felt the same way. He thrived in the hustle, making money, living in the fast lane.

When the two of you first started living together, you wondered if your ambitious natures would create a rift. Instead, it brought you even closer. Carving out time together amidst your busy schedules didn’t happen by accident - it was through deliberate design. At times that meant turning down lucrative contracts and opportunities for both of you, but that’s what was required to make the relationship work. Business trips were difficult, but you guys worked it out so that you weren’t apart for more than a week at a time. The sex was great afterwards, that wasn’t a surprise, but it was each other’s company you craved more than anything else.

The two of you used to be able to talk about anything, and now here you were, secluded together, and you barely exchanged any words. It reaffirmed all your doubts and fears. Too much had changed. All that love and intensity that once existed was gone. The realisation hurt your heart, made your insides twist with so much agony that it almost rivalled the physical pain you experienced from being tortured.

Billy stood up, bringing you out of your reverie. You noted the way his jaw clenched, how tense he was around you. Tears stung the back of your eyes but you didn’t want to cry in front of him. You got up, strolled over to the door, and slid into your boots before trying to wear your jacket. Not exactly easy to do with your hands bandaged.

“Where you going?”

“For a walk.”

“I’ll come with.”

You turned to face him. “You don’t look like you want to be around me.”

An irritated expression masked his face. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

You exhaled a resigned sigh. “Can we not? I just want some fresh air.”

“I’m not letting you wander around by yourself. So either I go with or you don’t go at all.”

“Really getting off on controlling me, aren’t you?” you bit out through clenched teeth.

He sneered at you, dark eyes flashing anger. “Oh yeah, worrying about keeping you safe 24/7 is getting me all hard.”

“Fuck off!”

You stormed out, muttering to yourself. It was cold outside but not the kind of chill that cut through to your bones. It felt good to breathe it in, to walk through the beautiful grounds with trees covered in snow and appreciate nature. Maybe you weren’t an outdoorsy person but there was something calming about the whole experience. Hearing the snow crunch behind you, you looked over at your shoulder to see Billy following behind you. He had on a dark beanie that covered his hair, nose red with cold, hands tucked into his pocket. Far cry from the man who shot up a warehouse to save you. You continued on your trail.

After several minutes, you stopped in your tracks and turned back to face him. “You can walk beside me if you want.”

He swaggered closer, a smirk playing across his lips. “Not gonna bite my head off?”

“Not yet.”

Next to you now, you both continued to follow the trail into the woods. Neither of you spoke, but unlike in the cabin there wasn’t awkwardness this time. “We used to be able to talk about everything,” you said softly.

He cast you a sidelong glance. “And we can’t now?”

You shrugged your shoulders. “You’ve barely spoken to me in the past few days. That never happened when we used to go away.”

“We spent our vacations fucking not talking.”

You rolled your eyes, shaking your head in exasperation.

“Maybe I’m not in a mood to talk,” he said quietly, staring straight ahead. “Maybe I’m so fucking worried about something happening to you that I’m barely hanging on.”

You stole a quick look at him. His eyes were dark with worry, face solemn. Guilt surged through you; you hadn’t realized he was still concerned but of course he was. You remembered his overprotective instincts all too well. After the relationship became serious, that streak went into overdrive and you had to talk him off the ledge many, many times. “I know you’ve been talking to your contacts. Any word about Fisk? Is he onto us?”

He shook his head. “No. I mean, there’s tons of shit going on. He’s not taking the warehouse burning thing lying down, but he’s got tons of enemies to focus on. We’re not on his radar.”

“Then you don’t have to worry.”

Billy turned to look at you, his gaze roaming over your face. “I’m not taking any chances.”

Silence followed, the only sound being the light wind that had started to blow.

“When do you think we can go back?” you asked.

There was a long pause before he answered. “Not for a while.”

“But you just said-”

“I was gonna go after Karen when Krista called me. By now she must’ve found out about Cerberus.”

Your heart lurched, remembering the wild goose chase you sent Karen on. She wouldn’t have found anything, but of course Billy didn’t know that.

“She’s probably told Frank all about it now. So it’s not just Fisk I gotta worry about.”

“There’s nothing for Karen to find.”

He stilled, his arm curving around your elbow. “You sent her to Florida.”

You stared up at him. “I did. At first I was hellbent on having her find the truth and tell Frank.” Hurt loomed over his face, causing your stomach to coil with anxiety. “But then I couldn’t go through with it. As much as I hated you, I couldn’t do that to you. So I destroyed everything before she could find it.”

“Because you still love me.”

There was pain in his eyes but there was also a flicker of hope, hope that you didn’t want to feel, even as it emanated from him and reverberated through you, making your heart flutter. That tug of intensity grew strong, palpable, pulling you to him emotionally, overriding your defenses. You glanced away, suddenly finding it hard to breathe. You started walking back to the cabin, your heart pounding in your chest. Earlier you were lamenting about the loss of intensity in your relationship but you’d forgotten how all-consuming it could be, how it fed and strengthened the connection you two shared. The same bond that brought you so much ecstasy and happiness when things were good, and completely shattered you when he turned against you after the accident.

Could you really risk falling so hard again? To open yourself up so fully that when things didn’t work out you would inevitably find yourself drowning in despair? Somehow you managed to finagle yourself back together after the last time but what if he broke your heart again? There was no way you could bounce back, you weren’t that resilient.

You climbed up the porch stairs and headed for the door.

“You asked why I’m staying away.”

Billy’s voice made you tremble as you turned around to face him. He was standing at the bottom of the stairs leading up to the porch, his dark gaze piercing through you.

“’Cause I don’t know how to be around you without touching you.”

His voice was husky, filled with raw need as he slowly and deliberately stalked forward. “All I fucking want is you. Every hour, every minute. You’re in here.” He tapped the side of his temple. “And here.” He tapped his heart. “You want space, but the only way I can do that is by not looking at you. Because when I see you…” His voice dropped to a whisper as he closed the distance and pressed up against you, trapping you against the door. “I can’t control myself. You drive me fucking crazy, you always have. And I want to invade every fucking inch of you until there’s no you or me, just us.”

You stared up at him, swallowing the lump in your throat as his breath hummed against your cheeks. His close proximity was playing havoc with your mind, heart thundering like it was ready to explode out of your chest.

“But it scares you, this side of me. It always has.”

A sharp breath escaped you when he cradled your face.

“You wish I was normal, don’t you? Someone safe, someone who doesn’t obsess over you.” Hurt saturated his words, anger unfurling in his tone. His breath grew ragged, his hands more desperate as they travelled down from your face to the length of your body, gentle yet demanding as his fingers encircled your hips. “You’ve had a taste of normal and that’s what you fucking want now. But that’s not me. It’ll never be me.”

You shook your head. “I knew who you were since the very beginning.” You glared up at him, daring him to hold your gaze. “The crazy part of you that stalked me and bugged my phone calls and beat up my exes and all that other messy shit you pulled never scared me.”

“No?” he murmured, resting his forehead on yours.

“No.”

“Then why did we fight over that shit?”

“Because you’d try and hide it except you were never that slick.”

He sent you a smile, one that started off as cocky but then shifted to something more pensive, vulnerability eclipsing his molten dark eyes. He was the only one who could disarm you with simply a look, push you to reveal all of your emotions so you were left completely exposed and defenseless. Even now, you were still filled with doubts while still yearning for him. Needing respite, you closed your eyes to him.

“Then tell me what scares you.”

The desperate urgency in his voice made your insides tremble. Tears stung your eyes but you refused to open them and meet his gaze. “It’s the same thing that’s always scared me. That you’ll break my fucking heart.” A wrenching sob escaped you. “And you did, Billy. You broke me.”

You refused to look at him. Not even when he cradled your cheeks, his lips tracing the trail of tears, murmuring soft, sincere apologies, his beard prickling your skin as he held you close. You were so tired and spent from holding it together, of guarding your heart at all times from him. It was exhausting and you were done and you didn’t want to do it anymore.

When he guided you inside you didn’t fight, allowing him to remove your coat and shoes before taking you to the couch and draping you over his lap. His hand caressed through your hair while you clung to him, the other rubbing circles on your thigh.

It was a long while before either of you spoke again, your head tucked into the corner of his neck.

“You think you’ll ever trust me again?”

That was the million dollar question, wasn’t it? And one you didn’t have an answer to. “I don’t know.”

“What can I do?”

You could sense his panic in the way his hands dug into your skin, how distressed he was even though he was trying to appear calm in front of you. You wished you could say comforting words that would reassure him but there was no point; it would be a lie. “Right now I just need you to hold me.” It wouldn’t solve anything, but it was what you wanted from him.

“I can do that.”

For a long time you two sat there embracing each other, with you occasionally dropping tender kisses on the base of his throat. He hadn’t shaved since the two of you came to the cabin, and you liked the feel of his thicker facial hair, running your fingers along his beard. He stroked your back, clinging to you, like he was afraid to let you go. It reminded you of when you weren’t feeling well or on your period and he would hug you to make you feel better. It was the daily gestures of affection you missed the most, the little things he would do to make your life easier rather than grand romantic acts. “Where would be right now if things hadn’t gotten messed up?”

You felt the weariness in him as he shifted on the couch, bringing you to lie down next to him. Head balanced on his elbow, he hovered over you with his other hand resting on your chest. “It’s not the future I think about anymore.” He paused, his gaze interlocked with yours. “If I could, I’d go back to the past, to that night of the accident. I wouldn’t leave, I’d stay glued right next to you.”

His words broke your heart. You had re-lived that night of the accident so many times, blamed yourself over and over again for insisting he run errands, imagined a million different scenarios where it had been you that decided to leave rather than him –

“I lost everything that night.”

Eyes welled with tears, you reached up to touch his face. Your fingers traced over his scars, wishing there was some way you could make him whole again. He closed his eyes, breathing you in as if consumed by you. Despite all the pain and heartbreak of the past few years, you couldn’t bear to see him so hopeless. “Billy, you have your life back. You have Anvil.”

“None of it means anything without you.”

His despair tugged at you, the devastation in his dark eyes tearing through your soul. You could deal with his anger, but the agonizing grief in his voice wasn’t something you could argue against. “Billy,” you urged softly. “You can be happy again. You were fine before we got together.”

A bittersweet smile curved over his face. “Fine.” He shook his head, snickering. “Yeah, that’s what I was. Just cruising through life. Chasing money and tail.” The smile on his face faded, emotions brimming in the deep pools of his gaze as he centered his focus on you. “I didn’t know what it meant to happy until I fell in love with you.”

You swallowed the lump in your throat, trying not to cry. “Billy-”

“It’s not the same for you, I know,” he said with resigned sadness. “You want to move on with your life. You wanna be happy without me-”

“Because too much has happened!” you protested, your voice cracking. “It took everything I had to get over you!” you insisted, shaking your head. The depth of betrayal and loss you’d experienced had left it’s mark on you permanently, you were terrified of taking that kind of risk again. You couldn’t.

Billy didn’t argue with you. Instead, he took your hand and brought it to his lips, placing a warm kiss on your flesh. “You’re scared to love me again.”

You bit down on your bottom lip, not wanting to speak.

“And I’m fucking terrified of not loving you,” he murmured. “So I guess we’re at an impasse.”

“Maybe our future together isn’t what we imagined but that doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. Maybe we could-”

“Be friends?” He sneered, mocking you. “And do what? Talk on the phone?”

You yelped when he firmly trapped your hands over your head, caging your face in between. His eyes seemed to come alive suddenly, glinting with menace and anger as he ground down on you, making you acutely aware of every fucking inch of him. “Is that what you want, sugar? Gossip about the losers you’ll fuck?”

You knew it was a stupid idea to taunt him but the possessive part of him had a way of driving you crazy. Seeing him unravel with jealousy was how you first realized he actually cared about you, and that still remained true. Jutting your chin out, you glared up at him defiantly. “I won’t be fucking losers, babe.”

Somehow his pitch-black eyes appeared even darker, his lips breaking into a cheshire cat like smile. “That’s right, sweetheart. You won’t be fucking anyone. ‘Cause I’ll be right there with you, every step of the way, cockblocking anyone who tries to touch you.”

Palpable desire coursed through you as the friction of his jean-clad knee rubbed between your thighs. You could feel his hard-on, your body aching to take him in - but you weren’t ready to give in quiet yet. “You can’t watch my every move, Billy. If I want to fuck random strangers, there’s nothing you can do to stop me.” You feigned a saccharine-sweet smile. “I’ll find a way. I always do.”

“Then I’ll just have to kill anyone who comes near you,” he rasped. His one hand locked down on both of your wrists while the other encircled your neck. His grip was loose, stroking your skin, his eyes holding you captive. “But that won’t be a problem, right? ‘cause you love that about me, don’t you sweetheart?” You trembled as his hand unwrapped from around your neck and trailed down your chest. Despite the thick layer of the sweater you were wearing, you felt his touch sear your skin, making your body tremble.

“I never said I loved it,” you argued back. “Just that I accepted it.”

His smile grew more wicked, daring, as he pulled up your sweater and gathered it around your chest. The cold air in the room provided much needed respite from the heat of his touch until his fingers smoothed over your breasts, tweaking your hardened nipples over your t-shirt bra. Your underwear was far from sexy but the way his eyes gleamed with hunger as he gazed down at you made you feel like you were wearing some exquisite lace lingerie.

“Your tits…” his voice was filled with breathless wonder, like he was seeing you for the first time. Like you were the most beautiful thing he ever saw. “You’re fucking beautiful.”

His mouth closed over your right nipple, sucking on the hardened nub over the fabric of the bra. You squirmed, moaning loudly as Billy devoured your boobs, alternating between them after he removed your bra, moulding your breasts between his hands and worshipping them with his lips.

His grip on you eased, his free hand stroking its way down to your pussy, brushing your cunt in that oh-so-tantalizing way that had you jumping off the couch if not for the weight of Billy’s body weighing you down. You wanted more from him, needed more, his mouth and hands not enough. “Billy, please-”

“Please what?” he growled. He looked up from your left boob, eyes burning bright with passion. He rubbed his beard on your tender skin, eliciting a guttural moan from you. “What do you want, babe?”

“Fuck me!”

“You want my cock, love? Want me inside your sweet, wet cunt so you can squeeze me so hard I lose my fucking mind? Is that how you want it?”

“Yes!” you bit out impatiently, circling your legs around his ass, locking him in place.

He sent you an arrogant smile, full of smugness as he placed tiny, fluttery kisses on your soft belly, dipping his tongue into your navel, sliding down inch by inch. A sharp breath escaped your mouth as he slipped his fingers underneath your tights and past your cotton panties, gliding along your seam, arcing inside you in just the way you liked. You tugged at his arms, coming undone as you begged for more. Before you lost your mind he knelt between your legs, moving his hand to the buttons on his jeans. You moved up to help him-

-when he suddenly moved away from the couch.

Bewildered, you stared after him as he swaggered to the bathroom. “Billy?”

He shut the door behind him, oblivious to you.

Infuriated, you got off the couch and stormed over to the bathroom. Finding it locked, you started banging on the door. The shower turned on the next second.

What the fuck? What the hell was going on?

You started pacing back and forth, trying to calm down.

It was a few minutes before the shower stopped. Soon the bathroom door opened and Billy stood there, towel wrapped around his waist, damp skin and lean muscles aching to be touched. You gave yourself a mental shake, refusing to get distracted. “What the hell was that?”

He smiled. Crossing his arms, he leaned on the doorway. “I realized something,” he drawled in an insolent tone.

“What?”

“I have one trump card in this whole thing and I plan to use it.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

He sauntered forward, arrogant and beautiful as he came to a stop in front of you. You tried not to let his close proximity affect you but it proved to be impossible when he peered at you with his gorgeous face.

“You want me, sweetheart. And I want you. But we’re not gonna fuck until you’re ready to be my wife again.”

To be continued...

A/N - Thanks for your patience and bearing with me. If you’re still reading, thank you so much! I hope you enjoy the conclusion of this universe. I would say about 2-3 more chapters to go.

Also, just wanted to draw attention to this wonderful anon who gifted me lovely fanart. You can see it here. Please leave them a kind word!

#billy russo x reader #billy russo #ben barnes #the punisher #a woman scorned #a woman reborn

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