#a vent session can be extremely satisfying

[panharmonium]

What do you think about this: "Kakashi was never interested in Sasuke as an individual, he only projected himself into him and saw a smaller version of himself on Sasuke, Sasuke was never Sasuke to him, just a little Kakashi". I wanted to know your opinion because I miss your meta posts and I feel like lately people are hating Kakashi for things that aren't real :/, also you are really good at explaining and I feel that both characters need love

Hello! Thanks for the question!

The answer to "what do i think about this" is, honestly, that I don't think about it X) I watched the whole show without engaging with the fandom at all (for fear of spoilers, initially), so I was able to experience it without being exposed to anyone else's thoughts, and now that I'm done I generally still avoid poking around, because devoting mental energy to opinions that I find bizarre/not supported by the text doesn't enhance my fandom experience.

Kakashi and Sasuke's relationship is one of the most compelling things about the series to me. I was very surprised when I finished the show/manga and first exposed myself to the fandom only to find so few people invested in them, but at this point I've (mostly) stopped asking myself "what show was everyone else watching" and just settled into enjoying the show that I watched, because that's more fun for me. I can't convince people not to dislike Kakashi if that's what they want to do. I do find it a little weird, because I don't think that's what the story is asking from us, but as long as people mind their business and aren't bugging me on my own blog, they're free to do what they want.

I know it can be frustrating when there are people hating various characters for "things that aren't real," but the fact that these criticisms aren't "real" is precisely why I generally avoid engaging with them. For Kakashi, specifically, there are certain things people can say that will immediately make me stop taking them seriously - "projecting" is one. "Bootlicking" is another, but again, these terms are so wildly inaccurate that I'm not interested in talking about them. The manga and the show are easily accessible; if people want to rewatch/re-read them, they can.

In general, I just prefer to avoid engaging with most of the fandom negativity I see. I think overall most of the rancor I've stumbled across boils down to people engaging with the story in very ungenerous ways, if that makes sense, and that's not how I prefer to read/watch things. Like - back when I was still in the middle of watching the show, I remember someone sent me a message saying that they loved seeing me talk about the story with earnestness/joy, and it was such a lovely message to receive, but it also made me pause and wonder for a second if this was really an uncommon enough thing to be remarked upon. Wouldn't that be the default? Aren't we all here because we love the story and the characters so much? But the truth is that sometimes it does feel like large chunks of fandom spaces (not just Naruto, I mean; I've certainly experienced this elsewhere) are very focused on being negative about "things that aren't real," as you said. Like - people calling Sakura "abusive" for bopping Naruto on the head when he says something rude, when this is not something the text is even remotely trying to say about her. People writing off Jiraiya's entire storyline because of the non-consensual spying on women - which, yes, of course, is disgusting and wrong. Obviously. I am very aware of that. However, I can simultaneously recognize that the story isn't really interested in that or intending me to read it like that; the voyeurism is written as a joke (yes, I understand how gross that is) and there are a hundred potential personal and/or patriarchal and/or genre-related and/or cultural factors that may have gone into Kishimoto writing this particular fail. If I want to understand and appreciate what the story was ACTUALLY trying to communicate with Jiraiya (that he's an idealist who gave up on the world when everything went wrong, who turned to shallow pleasures of the flesh to distract him from the pain of his disillusionment, and who was finally restored to his former faith after meeting Naruto), then I have to mindfully set the voyeurism aside and go, "This writer wrote a gross thing, and I recognize that, but I'm also not going to fixate on it, because I can simultaneously appreciate/find meaning in what he was really trying to say."

I think some of the Kakashi complaints out there very much fall under this umbrella. If I have to see one more person frothing at the mouth about Kakashi briefly tying Sasuke (a qualified ninja who has already demonstrated his ability to escape rope restraints and whom Kakashi has been individually mentoring, sparring against, and connecting with for a month) to a tree for approximately sixty seconds - honestly. I don't know how to tell people they're missing the point, so I don't bother.

Ultimately, the fact of the matter is that people are entitled to dislike any character that they want, even for contrived reasons. As long as they're doing their own thing in their own space and letting me do my thing in mine, we're good.

#now - don't get me wrong; my sister and i vent to each other all the time about the bad takes we've seen #a vent session can be extremely satisfying #and sometimes typing up a complain-y rant is good for the soul #but ultimately when it comes down to what i spend my time posting about #i'd rather spend most of my time writing about the stuff i love instead of refuting all of the opinions i don't agree with #it's just fandom in the end #i'm here to enjoy myself and connect with other people who enjoy the story in a similar way #i assume other people are here to do that too - even when our modes of enjoyment look very different #as long as we're chilling in our own spaces and not hopping onto other people's posts to start arguments #everything's good #naruto #replies #fandom

[hetalea]

Words thrown into the void

Pretty sure it's been a few years since I've used this account and I doubt anyone's gonna see this but regardless of if sb sees it or not it doesn't matter

I've been holding a lot of things in recently that I feel the need to share but I'm not ready to verbalize yet so I feel like this blog is a good compromise because I share my words but not really probably since it's unlikely anyone's gonna see it and in any case I stay anonymous, so I might use it as a diary of sorts for the time being

I'm a medical resident in my very last few months of residency before becoming a GP I've been in therapy for 3 years following a depressive episode in the beginning of my residency related to anxiety and confidence issues

I'd been doing better these past few months but I feel like these days it's getting worse again, idk if it's the stress of finishing residency or due to other factors or even coincidental

I feel like my anxiety levels have spiked significantly in the last few weeks, I'm easily overwhelmed if I have to deal with too many things at once, I get angry extremely easily, I feel like crying after consults that I feel like I didn't handle in a satisfactory manner....

Thing is therapy, that used to help, feels more like a work meeting than actual therapy for me these days, I've been pretty happy with my therapist so far, she takes time to listen to my concerns, she gives good insights. Problem is these days our sessions feel more like the kind of meeting you'd have in a ward discussing patients than sessions to actually help me better myself. My main concern these days is that because my stress is so high and thus I get angry so easily sometimes I'm short or even bitchy with my patients, or they'll have so many complains in one consult that get overwhelmed, freeze, overlook stuff, switch to my "act in panic first then think later" mode,...thing is because of all of that I've been feeling extremely guilty for not treating my patients like I should or not delivering adequate care... thus I've been trying to talk to my therapist about that in past sessions, hoping to have some advice on how to manage myself so I can keep it together at least for the duration of the consult so I can act properly and professionally as I should, I've even asked her in the past about starting cognitive behavioral therapy which she agreed was a good idea and that we could do it but then it didn't happen. And now when I try to adress how inadequate I think my behavior is and how guilty I feel about it what happens is I get a course on the different types of postures a patient can adopt faced with their physician and which ones are pathological or not and we discuss cases we've each had where I get to vent about consults that frustrated me, but I get no actual advice on how to manage my stress when I feel myself becomming this short and bitchy and panicky over nothing during my consults...and I'm afraid soon she'll tell me we don't need sessions anymore, leaving me without anybody to help me get my shit together, because in our most recent sessions she's been remarking that I've become more confident than when we started our sessions, which is true but I still feel like I still have very flawed patterns of behaviors that I need to get rid of

I finish my residency in two months and then I'll have to work by myself without the safety net of having a supervisor in case of a freak out and that terrifies me and I don't know if I'm ready for it

My current supervisor seems satisfied with my work and even suggested several times he would like it if I could come sub-in for him during his vacations after I finish, which reassures me a bit because it at least means that even if I'm feeling inadequate I'm at least not a complete health hazard or danger to society but I feel like I can't be a proper doctor before I finish to deal with my shit and I fear my lack of confidence might make me a danger to my patients. Problem is, my anxiety won't magically disappear in two months, and I'll still have to work if I don't wanna starve

Maybe I'm just being paranoid, but I feel close to a breaking point. I had a week off in july and I had hoped that this would relieve my stress but doesn't feel like it has. I've taken up meditation again and forced myself to go back to the gym but I don't even feel the benefits that I used to feel from that

Maybe I'm just really tired; probably the fact that this whole month I've been working full time instead of my usual part time (since my supervisor at my other part-time place was in vacation) in a clinic that is very particular didn't help, I feel like it did burn me out a little but going back to my usual schedule for the past two weeks hasn't helped much yet, I feel instead that I brought all the stress-induced bad habits I've picked up from the clinic into my other location instead of becoming more balanced

Anyway, should probably try to go eat a proper meal and sleep early tonight so I have at least part of my life in order

#diary #therapy #work shit

[shotorozu]

polyamory headcanons

(bakudeku x reader)

character(s) : bakugou katsuki, midoriya izuku (bnha)

legend : [Y/N = your name] they/them pronouns used, strong quirk (not specific)

headcanon type : all of them minus the extreme angst (x reader)

note(s) : i have another platonic class 1-a post coming right up! and another lengthy post,, theres no editing with this whdnwks

»»————-　♡　————-««

how it came to be

so this entire thing practically began even before bakugou realized his feelings for you (i’ll explain in a bit)

midoriya KNEW there was something going on, as soon as he met you he just didn’t know what it was. and he eventually realized his feelings for you when the dekusquad made him realize after being in denial

meanwhile, bakugou was never going to admit that he, bakugou katsuki— was crushing on what was an ‘extra’ to him

i wouldn’t really say you’re an extra really, because your quirk is so impressive to the both of them, labelling you as an extra would be dumb.

the dekusquad urged him to just make his move, while bakugou was still stuck in his denial stage (much to the bakusquad’s dismay)

midoriya was the first one to express his interest, asking you questions ranging from your quirk, to basically anything about yourself.

and bakugou had to sit through all of it in silence because he just had to sit right infront of you two

eventually— it became too much, because a big confrontation sparked between the two, with bakugou asking what the hell he was doing with you

and around this time, midoriya wasn’t so ‘scared’ of bakugou anymore. i mean, there’s still respect going around— but he won’t allow himself to be beat up anymore!

“if you like Y/N, why don’t you make a move, kacchan?”

it’s very competitive— a lot more than before. bakugou finally started to make his move, forcing offering you to spar with him, and making you food.

and midoriya only continued to make advances (the bakusquad and the dekusquad were in shambles just watching the three of you)

and that’s where you’re stuck between 2 choices. it’s hard because you like the both of them! they’re amazing in their own way

to stop the bickering, you proposed a polyamory— to satisfy all sides of the story. izuku immediately agree, and while bakugou HATED the idea, it was better than not having you at all

as long as izuku’s willing to share, then he won’t be so opposed to it. he’s in for it for you

everyone was so shocked when it was revealed that you three were DATING

hugs

you’re always in the middle, this isn’t very surprising.

katsuki always wants you to be in his bear hug, and midoriya would be content with just spooning you.

it’s so hot when it comes to cuddling, and no, not in that way. i mean— katsuki’s body heat is just TOO MUCH

so, y’all just ditch the damn blanket, y’all have katsuki anyway.

katsuki’s arms will be hooked around your waist— his head placed on the crook of your neck.

meanwhile izuku held your hand, his legs sprawled on top of yours— his head laying on your chest.

also, there will be a lot of kicking 💀

but, you do occasionally let katsuki be in the middle when it’s especially colder. you don’t want izuku to be cold too.

kisses

similar to my todomomo x reader post, the three of you find each other doing that classical kiss— where two people kiss your cheek at the same time (on opposite sides)

katsuki’s lips are warm, pretty soft. not at all flakey— and izuku’s lips are a little bit on the drier side, but they’re pretty smooth.

because izuku has a lot of scars on his hands, you’ll take your time with kissing each scar— meanwhile, katsuki traces the scars on his free hand

you and izuku love kissing katsuki’s cheekbones. he says he absolutely hates it when you both do it without warning, but he can’t help but anticipate it— every time you both go near his face

katsuki and izuku love to hold contests on who can fluster you the most— and who can kiss you the longest :))

how you guys spend time

if there’s something you can all agree on— it’s that katsuki’s cooking is the best.

cooking sessions are a staple of your relationship

y’all tend to close your eyes, and just pick a random recipe— so that you can try to make it, even if katsuki doesn’t like the food

he’ll still make it, because his ego gets fed whenever he sees you and izuku watch him cook intensely

there were plenty of times where y’all almost burned down the kitchen while trying to make wagyu beef

but it is pretty fun to hear katsuki’s food commentary, which is usually rare— since he loves to cook in silence

comfort

you basically have 2 guard dogs with you. they’re so protective— anyone that messes with you won’t see the light of day

if you get hurt during training, they’ll freak the fuck out— debating if they should drag you to recovery girl, or if they should patch you up themselves

katsuki would make izuku run to the medkit, and katsuki would take a look at any injuries— massaging any sore muscles

we all know katsuki is shit at words, especially when it comes to reassurance and panic attacks (if ever) but that’s why izuku’s here

he knows exactly what to do (excluding the first time) and he knows exactly what to say, but that doesn’t mean katsuki is useless

he’ll pull you close against his chest, softly rocking you back and forth— wiping any tears that cascade down your cheeks, caressing your arms up and down

if izuku felt terrible, you’ll distract him by keeping you close— while katsuki RAN to get the all might documentary izuku wouldn’t stop watching, and a few blankets

y’all don’t need blankets but, it’s helpful in situations like this

if katsuki was feeling down, you and izuku would allow him to vent, getting everything out in his system— as the both of you sat right next to him, comforting him in silence

overall (and additional things)

it’s a big rollercoaster

they’re the best boyfriends you’ll ever have, despite the initial tension.

of course, there will be fights here and there— due to katsuki and izuku’s clashing personalities (and competitiveness)

but you’re also the mediator for the both of them, technically a middle point. something that’d get them to get along for once

the entire relationship is so powerful?? like,, wow. you must be hella hot AND special if you’re dating izuku and katsuki.

the chemistry is good though— you all tend to agree on one thing for sure, it’s that none of you would have it differently,

because it’s three or none in this house

overall? 10/10.

»»————-　♡　————-««

likes and reblogs are appreciated, thanks for reading!

i do not own bnha/mha and it’s characters. boku no hero academia/my hero academia belongs to horikoshi kohei, i only own the writing and i do not profit off of my hobby

do not plagiarize, reupload, translate, or use my works for audio readings without permission

#bnha imagines #bnha x reader #mha x reader #mha imagines #bnha x y/n #bnha fluff #bakugou x reader #bakugou x you #bakugou x y/n #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugou imagines #bakugou katsuki x y/n #bakugou headcanons #midoriya x reader #midoriya x y/n #midoriya x you #midoriya izuku x reader #midoriya izuku x y/n #izuku midoriya x gn reader #midoriya imagines #midoriya headcanons #bakudeku x reader #bkdk x reader #bkdk fluff

[shirophantomvox]

Chrollo, Hisoka, and Illumi Headcanons

Chrollo, Hisoka, Illumi, and Leorio headcanons

Hello, anon! I am so sorry for taking longer than usual to respond to this post. I have been so busy with A LOT lately but I have time now! I don’t know if you want N/SFW, romantic or non so I’ll go based on what comes to mind! I know many Tumblr users have made these types of assumptions for them a lot but I wanted to join in. I started writing this last night so forgive me if there are any unbearable grammar errors. I hope you like it anon, I tried my best. I have to work on my headcanons for them because I try to keep them in character. Since we don’t have much background info on ⅔, I have to keep it as realistic as possible. FYI N/SFW content is mentioned.

Discord for Voltron and HxH fans

Let’s start with Chrollo.

Chrollo (SFW)

I’ve seen on here that a lot of you headcanon Chrollo to be an understanding man when it comes to feelings for his significant other. Given his soft voice and calm demeanor, I’m sure that is somewhat true.

It seems like Chrollo isn’t on board with over-the-top PDA meaning he would agree to hand-holding and his arm around you but nothing more. He saves the...other stuff for when you two are alone. Because of Chrollo’s past, it seems like he wouldn’t want to be seen in public that much because that can cause him to get caught by the authorities.

He takes your safety very seriously. You understand that when he is with the Phantom Troupe that you are not to interrupt until the business is over. He doesn’t allow you to get involved with the missions because of how dangerous they can be (example: the auction). He knows you can handle it, he prefers for you not to be involved. Feelings and work can make things difficult.

Although Chrollo hides in the shadows, I imagine he lives in a penthouse with expensive furniture, white and black color pattern, and large windows that have an astonishing view of Yorknew.

After you both have worked long and hard, you open the door just to see the lights dimmed so dark that it matches the night atmosphere. There are rose petals leading to the bathroom where a bubble bath is waiting. As you enter the bathroom, your boyfriend is waiting there, submerged in bubbles sticking his arms out. Candles light up the tiny room casting a romantic shadow from your body. You grab his hand and gently sit in the tub. The warm water felt amazing; it helped your aching muscles (from exercising) feel better. Chrollo gently grabbed your arm and pulled you into a warm, loving embrace. He wrapped his toned arms around your body and rested his chin on your shoulder. He didn’t say a word but instead breathed heavily, kissed your shoulder, and leaned back against the wall. On days like this, he didn’t say much but his actions spoke louder than words.

Chrollo NSFW

I think Chrollo is a passionate lover. This assumption comes from his calm demeanor. He seems to be incredibly patient so if you aren’t positioning yourself the right way or something, he’ll work with you to make sure you get it and you are comfortable.

He is touchy. That means during the nitty-gritty, he likes to touch your face, chin, lips, and your torso as a way to show more affection.

When he is in the mood, he moves slowly then very fast. He cannot resist the urges and feelings he has for you.

He loves to do this while the drapes are open although you have expressed that you like your privacy. It’s ironic. He doesn’t like extreme PDA but is ok with sleeping with you while the lights from the city shine near your penthouse window. Ah, guys are confusing.

After the climax, he lays flat on the bed and pulls you close. He leaves about an inch in between because heat is still radiating off your bodies and it’s summertime.

Hisoka (SFW) If his significant other was shy.

People have mixed feelings about Hisoka, feelings, and whether or not if he is gentle or not. I don’t think that Hisoka is gentle but begins to lay off the harsh jokes or pranks as he sees that you both have fought before and you’re not as weak as he thought.

Unlike Chrollo, he is all for PDA. This ranges from hand holding to playful kisses to passionate kisses. When I saw Hisoka for the first time, I immediately thought he was a fuck boy. A fuck boy is a boy that is only interested in sleeping with someone and doesn’t intend on pursuing a relationship.

He’d take the pleasure of appreciating your presence as well as testing your patience. If you are shy and are easily flustered, he will change that. He’ll do things like kissing you, calling you affectionate names, or anything that will cause you to respond. You hit him jokingly. Still not getting the message, he continues and you hit him harder. This is where he releases a medium moan which causes everyone to look in your direction. You freeze; face flushed and he’s laughing his ass off.

“What’s the matter,” he asks, covering his mouth. “You look flushed~♥.”

“You’re doing too much. Stop playing around! People are staring~💯.” You cover the side of your face. True enough you were a little mortified but in a good way. You knew he did this because he liked you but sometimes he played too much.

This is when he pulls you closer to his face, your ear next to his mouth, and whispers something in your ear that sent chills down your spine that made you blush more than before. He nearly puckered his lips as he spoke. He took his index finger and thumb to caress your cheek.

“Raising your voice at me? That simply won’t do. Aren’t you aware of the consequences~♥?”

You knew better than to not say anything because he would cup your cheeks and pull you into a deep kiss, and wouldn’t let go until he was sure that everyone was looking.

Both of you enjoy red, white, and rose wine. To him, wine equals classiness and sophistication. After fighting each other for hours (which he considers training for you and exercise for him) drinking wine and watching Lifetime (television for idiots) is a great way to end the night.

NSFW

As stated above, I originally thought that Hisoka was a fuck boy, so I am going to roll with that thought. This man has the potential of being rough and if he is too rough this is the time where you can speak up and say so. He’ll listen to you. Similar to Chrollo, he can be very romantic if he wants to. The rose petals gimmick was played out.

Instead, he hides in the darkest part of the living room waiting for you.

You turn on the lights and immediately head to the kitchen to drink a bottle of ice-cold water. Summer nights in Yorknew were hot and humid, almost unbearable. It felt like you were being suffocated. Becoming impatient, Hisoka clears his throat loudly causing you to nearly jump out of your skin; choking on the water you were drinking. He released a sexy chuckle. When you turned around, there stood your chiseled buff boyfriend bare with a ribbon tied in various directions around his body. Your birthday was two days ago and he was your gift. Although you have seen him like this before, for some reason you were too flustered to make a move. He already knew that you were tired from work, so he carried you in his arms to the Exercise Room and laid you gently on the floor. You smiled as a rush or passion took over your body resulting in you tearing off the ribbon tightly wrapped around his body. Since this was your birthday gift, he made it a night you’d remember forever! Surprisingly, no roughhousing, just soft and gentle. This proves that Hisoka has the capability of being humane. His strokes were to your liking and the gazes that you both exchanged were mind-blowing. Why couldn’t he be this way all the time? After it all, you fell asleep at her quickly. You were on the floor but now on top of your king-sized bed, with the message control on high. He stayed awake, watching TV, and thought about how he was going to pick a fight with you at the crack of dawn.

Hisoka’s ability to flirt and send the intended person swooning is a talent of itself. Lots of people do not possess this talent. Sometimes it's intentional and sometimes it's not. He speaks softly and smoothly, are he has to do is ask and it shall be done.

Illumi SFW

Illumi gives the impression that he is a “quiet” freak. This means that true enough he is focused on his job but if the moment comes along he will give in. He isn’t into PDA at all and if he does feel like showing some affection it will be done in private. Even though he appears to be a zombie, laying on or even cuddling with his significant other will help him relax for once. Imagine having to complete many missions in a day, exhausted, and have a wonderful person waiting to act as a human pillow for your weary head. Even Illumi can’t resist that.

If he likes you and plans to marry you, he will make that known to everyone to avoid confusion. Illumi represents the stereotypical shy boy; he is anti-social, prefers to only be around people he knows and trusts, and carries out the duties of his job.

After everything has been completed for the day, he wouldn’t mind ( and secretly begs) for silent cuddles with his significant other and to just fall asleep. At this point, you are used to it so this is all you want and you are satisfied. When he does talk, it’s usually about something he found out from work that he knows should be kept quiet but he tells you anyway. Late nights are the time of day where Illumi vents for a few hours. The details of these vent sessions could range anywhere from ���I wish you were there to see it” to “No, it would be too much”. As quiet and reserve as he is, his love is shown in a unique way that you have grown accustomed to.

NSFW

When the urge slaps him across the face like a sack of rocks, he cannot resist. Usually, he fights off the urge by exercising (mainly because you are out of the house or sleep) but this time he couldn’t shake it.

Before he gets started with anything, he styles his long hair in the shape of a bun so it doesn’t get in the way of action.

Although he is portrayed to be an emotionless zombie, he has some feeling deep inside him that he unleashes just for you. This is shown by gentle moist kisses being placed along your neck and once he reaches your shoulder that is when you wake up. Halfway through your sleepy eyes, you see a man with a devilish smile painted across his face. Who is this man? This couldn’t be your boyfriend. No way, no how.

Once he sees your sleepy smile, he just releases so many kisses that you throw the blanket off and he pulls you in closer.

Illumi will allow you both to switch the roles meaning he is in charge one time and you are on another day. Since you were still asleep, he decided to take on the role. He is surprisingly gentle in the beginning but as soon as it takes off, your ride him like a donkey. It ironic; he releases more noises than you! You have to remind him that noise travels! Great, you’re doing your job well! While it is important to take your job seriously, you need to have time to release that stress.

He uses his large eyes to stare into yours; you always found yourself lost in his gaze.

After it all, you lay back down waiting for your boyfriend to return from the kitchen. Illumi craves food like crazy after a good session. What’s better than donuts at 3 AM? COMFORT FOOD!!

These urges also come when you two are training together. Several times he’s had to guide you from behind on how to aim his needles. This time you noticed the packing of his pants which surprised you.

“Any questions,” he asked in a monotone voice.

“Yes. Why did you wear jogging pants? You’re giving yourself away.”

It was at this moment, he knew he fucked up. But let’s be honest, ok? He is standing behind the most beautiful person in the world, nostrils full of perfume, hair tied up, and has his left hand placed loosely on your thigh?! What was he thinking by wearing jogging pants when he was with you? He acted as if he didn’t know what you were talking about.

“You really don’t know?”

You kicked your backside out against him causing him to fall to the ground.

“Wow! Your legs are like jelly!”

“Why tease me,” He asked breaking out a small smile.

“You’re the one denying it.”

“Just get to it. I can’t wait any longer or else I’ll explode.”

The quiet ones are always the freakiest.

#hunter x hunter headcanons #hunter x 1999 #hunter x hunter #hunter x meme #hunter x reader #hunter x 2011 #chrollo x reader #chrollo x you #chrollo x y/n #hisoka x y/n #hisoka x reader #hisoka fluff #hisoka morow #hxh #illumi hunter x hunter #illumi zoldyck #illumi x y/n #illumi x reader #hunter x hunter x reader #hunter x hunter x you #hunter x hunter x y/n #chrollo lucilfer #hxh fandom #hxh 2011 #hxh x reader #hxh hisoka #hxh illumi #hxh 1999 #hunter x hunter imagines #hunter x hunter fanfiction

[lunasblipsandblurbs]

I know you've done the bois with a thicker girl but can I request something specifically about thick thighs? 🥺

Ofc bby! I've got hella thick thighs from years of volleyball (yes, so basic), EBRACE THE THICKNESS, personally I think thick thighs are hot af.

Hopefully these aren't too repetitive but overall they love em'

18+

Gender Neutral

Din Djarin

Hooo fuck the first time Din does a once over of you after you've got him pinned beneath you, he instantly is secretly smirking up at you under his visor. Your definitely his type, especially with your thick thighs, he's an absolute sucker for any curves but your thighs are always his go to for casual intamacy. Plenty of times Din will reach over while piloting just to rest his hand on your upper thigh.

Javier Pena

The minute Javier saw you in the bar he slinked right up to you. You looked good in your favorite pair of jeans, there was no denying that. He laid on the charm super heavy for you, once he sees that you have verbally and physically opened up to his flirtations hes gonna brush his hands against your thighs every so often, gently stimulating you while you get lost in his puppy dog eyes.

Frankie Morales

Ope hes flustered. Thighs have always been his thing regardless of the size, the fact that yours are thicker is just a plus for grabby hands over here. For real, if you are anywhere near him he will be sliding his broad hands up and down your thighs, he cannot help it.

Ezra

May this weary traveler rest his head upon your deliciously thick thighs? Ezra is a fucking cat with you constantly draping himself partially over you. He likes to get your attention if you're in bed by draping himself over your turned side. Eventually weighing you down to get you on your back as he shuffles to literally nuzzle his face against your silky soft thighs. It's what I always say, this man is a leech.

Max Phillips

WOW COME HERE LET ME BE YOUR BOYFRIEND PLEASE. Is basically Max's knee jerk self narrative. Your fucking hot and he needs to at least say hi to you. He's instantly gonna turn up his businessman charm and successfully get you on enough dates for you to realize that yeah, he's actually somewhat relationship material, in his own Max way. After you two are in an established relationship expect this man to never leave you alone. He loves your body heat and he loves to grip at your thighs and pull you up on his lap like its nothing, because it honestly is nothing with his super strength.

Pero Tovar

He's extremely satisfied with your build, you are healthy and strong and that means alot for this time period. Let alone the practicalities Pero is so into your body, specifically gripping and groping at your thighs. He loves pushing you up atop the table as he rubs up and down your thighs in anticipation.

Marcus Pike

Literally let him draw you. Please let him do a figure study on your fucking gorgeous body, he has a little protable heater! He thinks your a work of art, your body cascading with different curves, he loves the feeling of sloping his hands up your thighs towards where he really wants to be.

Agent Whiskey

This man is going to whistle at you and you legit are about to smack a hoe until you see its your boyfriend. He fucking loves those jeans on you. Instantly he is gonna great you by hugging you, pulling away and sliding his hands down your sides, past your hips, gently stroking the sides of your thighs until he gets bored and quickly gropes your ass, throwing you a wink.

Dave York

David can be a very tough person to read, thats why its always such a surprise when he reaches out and pinches the side of your thigh as he reads the paper. Many times you will wait up for him to return home from work, late out on a mission. He will eventually stumble in and face plant onto the couch where you are perched, face directly smushed into your thigh. He groans as he begins his rant and vent session of these "fucking idiots" he works with as you gently scratch his scalp gently calming him down.

Zach Wellison

He's really a simple man, he sees your nice thick thighs and hes instantly gonna reach out for you to instantly get onto his lap. He loves your thighs and thinks they're insanely sexy. He absolutely adores the feeling of your thighs cupping his head as he goes down on you, he's so good with his mouth that he always has your legs bent and locking around his head.

Omar Assarian

This little player is instantly gonna let you know that he is very much INTO your thicker thighs. He always loves to grab and grope at them if you are sitting near him. He also loves to be annoying and pinch at your thighs if you walk by him and refuse his grabby hands. He's definitely more of a softie with you, after long days of training he loves to come back and rest his head in your lap as you gently play with his hair and rub his temples.

#the mandolorian x reader #din djarin x reader #javier pena x reader #francisco morales x reader #frankie morales x reader #ezra prospect x reader #ezra (prospect) x reader #max phillips x reader #pero tovar x reader #marcus pike x reader #agent whiskey x reader #jack daniels x reader #dave york x reader #zach wellison x reader #omar assarian x reader #tw body image #tw body talk

[crappy-danganronpa-imagines]

Nagito, Kokichi and Hajime with an extremely hyper s/o if it’s okay

Gotcha gotcha!! On it!!

I'm back yall :3

And

Still sad af ✌😎

The nagito one's a bit short, srry

-Mod Makoto

Nagito, Kokichi, and Hajime with a hyper S/O!

Nagito Komaeda

Nagito isn't really one for fast-paced activities or sudden changes, he prefers to take things slow

So when you two fell in love?

Chaos.

Honestly, he just wants to do whatever is best to support you, his lover, his hope, even if that means going along with your zippy way of doing things

Chaos that often left him confused, but that he didn't really mind

After all, trash like him shouldn't confine such talent and hope to his idioti-

When he starts on those rants, you always stop him early on, usually with a quick "Shh!" or by speaking over him until he stops

You two like going on dates to places like amusement parks and arcades, though things get messed up pretty quickly with Nagito's luck cycle

And this he's glad for

He definitely confessed first btw

Kokichi Ouma

He'll apologize as soon as something went wrong, but you just laugh about it and shrug it off

A lot of times you invite him over for nights in, or cuddles, and he really appreciates the rest together and the kindness you give him

You two both work things out, you figure out a good balance between Nagito's calmer ways of thinking and your energetic brain

You give him compliments and PDA frequently, and it leaves him all flustered and happy

He doesn't do much PDA, but he makes sure to show how much he loves you whenever you two are alone

Overall a very caring relationship, though it can sometimes get chaotic between his luck and your hyper personality

Hajime Hinata

Oh boy

You two are on the same wavelength

So much that sometimes even simple things like cuddling turn into a contest, if you're both in the mood

Dice. Dice. Dice. Dice.

There is no other option. One way or another, he absolutely will get you to join his evil organization and go prank people with him

The DICE members are nice and formal to you at first because of Kokichi's orders, but soon enough you're treated as part of their organization, meaning they won't hesitate to pick on you good-naturedly

Sometimes you and Kokichi go off alone, though

Because TP'ing Kaito's house is a romantic enough date for both of you

You two annoy the shit out of just about everyone for fun, actually

Even Miu

Especially Miu.

He makes a big show of PDA, always holding your hand and giving you small kisses, and you like to return the favor

He wants to make sure everyone knows you belong to the ultimate supreme leader and nobody else

Though it's rare, he does get jealous sometimes, and whenever he does he's so playfully dramatic about it

But you play along and act dramatic too until you both just laugh about it

Later on he will get clinger than usual, though

You being as crazy as him just makes him trust you more, somehow. He's somewhat anxious about it at first, because he's never been that vulnerable around anyone, but whenever he needs to vent or rant, you're there to listen and give advice if he wants.

Plus, your cheerful attitude helps him cheer up

Lots and lots of pet names between you two, including weird ones that are somewhere between a nickname and an inside joke with you

More than once one of you will wake up to a clever prank set by the other to activate right when you wake up

"Good morning Y/N! Aww, didya find my air horn? What a coincidence it sounded right when you were just baaaaarely awake, huh?"

(You grabbed your noise-canceling headphones and blasted the air horn at him after that.)

Don't worry, he can tell when you're not in the mood for jokes and pranks, and he respects you in those times just like you respect him

And there's nothing like when you two both burn out and get exhausted at the same time and fall into a deep sleep in each other's arms

God you piss this man off sometimes

He's fun to annoy, because he always ends up showing his reaction no matter how much he tries to hide it

You still have to apologize afterwards, though, because he can stay mad for a long time if he wants to

He's way too embarrassed to tell you, but he really admires you a lot

You don't have an ultimate talent and you can still be this happy and hyper in your life? How??

He wishes he could be like that, but doesn't understand how he can change to be that way

It was your help and happiness that got him out of the Kamukura Project mindset. He would've signed up for the experiment if he hadn't met you beforehand and learned there was a way to be satisfied without any special talent.

Both your personalities are rubbing off on each other tbh

Being in love with Hajime makes you a slightly calmer person, and you've noticed that he smiles a lot more nowadays

Between his need to relax and yours to have fun, you end up taking a lot of vacations together, mostly to beaches or on cruise ships

He's always keeping an eye on you, half to make sure you don't get in trouble and half because he just likes looking at you

Other than that he does no PDA whatsoever, and you learned pretty quickly that he doesn't like to recieve it either

He likes doing things for you, like making you meals and doing the housework, as a way of showing his love, and also because he still needs the reassurance that he can be a good person without the talents the Kamukura Project would've given him

He's big spoon and gives really good cuddles. You move around often during cuddle sessions, but he's strong enough to hold you still when he wants to.

You may get annoying sometimes, but Hajime loves you anyways

#mod makoto #Oh my god story time #nagito komaeda #nagito x reader #kokichi ouma #kokichi x reader #hajime hinata #hajime hinata x reader #im trying to have a schedule so i'll post a request once every 3-4 days ish #guess what im not dead

[wcamino-confessions]

Hey uh

Its basil. Some of you know me as m*tt. Please do not call me that, that name makes me uncomfortable. I'm here to do something that is long overdue, and for good reason. I wanted to make sure I was in the right state to apologize. By that I mean, that I have completely distanced myself from the pr*ship crowd and have become a better person. Also Tumblr is my trigger app so,,,

I don't expect forgiveness, and I do not need it, I just want to apologize to the people I might have hurt.

Alright, let's get to where this all started.

I'm not good with dates, and I do not have screenshots, so I am not good with the exact dates. The screen shots are out there somewhere though, and you can gladly take a look. I will link it if I find them.

Ok. So... God, this is hard to talk about.

Back in October 2020 something really shitty happened. It's extremely personal, and I would rather not talk about my issues jn too much details. All you really need to know is that i left this situation having nearly non stop panic attacks for 4 months. My mental Health was rapidly declining, and it caused me to spiral in to using many unhealthy coping mechanisms.

I was in a horrible place in my life. I had undiagnosed BPD, and I didn't know what the fuck was wrong with me. I just knew that I would do anything to stop it.

Enter late December, one of my second worst months. I started my first account, strawberry.pannacotta on Twitter. I would post tame content, mainly rambles and such. In that time I slowly dipped my toes in to the idea of proshipping, my friends were adamant that it was the best thing in the damn world, and that it was a good thing.

Little did I know they were very wrong.

Later that September I made the first of many posts that I may be known for. In that post I was venting out my frustration, since earlier that day I saw a 12 year old ask to sext 14-17 year olds on a confession account. I was scared and worried that someone would hurt the kid, and it translated in to rage, since ei had no better emotion to vent with.

I said a lot of things, but they are un important, since its simply rambling. What is important is that I said "someone should doxx this kid". In hindsight that was a shitty thing to say, but in the last bit of my post I wrote that the reason I wanted them to get doxxed was so someone could tell their parents what they are doing. Once again, this is no excuse, what I said was bad and has extremely harsh legal consequences. Doxxing is NOT a joke.

After that I wrote multiple posts about a suggestive NSFW incestuous relationship between a minor and multiple adults. I don't remember what I said, but I do remember it was explicit.

That was all I really had from the strawberry.pannacotta account. Most of the awful shit is from my kurapicatboy account.

The first disgusting post I made was a post of an underage anime boy being chased by a large dog. I forgot what I put as the caption, but I do know that it was hinting at possible beastiality. At the time my only friends were pro ship, and I had been manipulated in to believing that what I was doing was curing my trauma. It "worked' with my other trauma. Why not go the extra mile?

After that I made multiple posts about "lewding" qiqi from genshin impact. But that wasn't the worst part.

The worst post I made was me saying that "grooming is hot"

That is the post that made me rethink everything.

I was anxious, many of these posts were made during panic attacks. I was an unmedicated and undiagnosed person with BPD. I was also a people pleaser, who wanted to be praised and acknowledged by whatever group I had inserted myself in at the time.

I was extremely easily manipulatable, and my friends took advantage of that. They further encouraged me to keep making these posts, that doing these disgusting things were right, and that everyone else is in the wrong.

I am so sorry.

I'm sorry that I made all of these posts.

Km sorry that you all had to see this, See me in my worst state, see my extremely triggering posts.

I'm sorry for everything.

No, I don't want to come back to warriors amino. I'm done with warrior cats, and I'm satisfied with the accomplishments I have made in the past 5 years.

I just want to apologize to everyone I hurt, and every person I could have possibly triggered with the content I had posted.

The apology is long overdue, but I wanted to make sure that I was truthful with all of you when I made it.

I'm on medication, and approved for more frequent therapy sessions. I do not use social media other than TikTok, and even then I am a completely different person.

I am antiship, and asexual. I have been through a lot of things in the past 6 months, and I'm slowly recovering, but I can assure you all I am away from that awful crowd, and have surrounded myself in truly amazing people who have been so much less toxic to me.

Even if I am off of warriors amino, I am still working on my game dev projects. I have moved on from warriors, and have decided to become independent from any Fandom. I'm happy with where I am. I'm happy that I'm in a well enough mindset to make this and post it, and I'm happy to inform you all that u am doing better.

I NEVER condoned the harm of real children or animals. Yes, my posts were disgusting and harmful, yet I was convinced my content wasn't harmful since it was purely fiction. It was never my intent to harm. As a survivor of csa I will never put another child in danger.

If you have listened this far, thank you. I hope you have a great day.

#submission #tw rape #tw grooming #tw animal abuse ment #tw grooming ment #tw rape ment

[incognitoman1-2-3-4]

Observations - A K18 Short Story

A/N: To celebrate this blog turning three years old, I wanted to revisit an old Krillin & Eighteen story I had written some time ago and publish it here on my Tumblr with some minor improvements. If you would like to read it, I sincerely hope you enjoy it. Feedback is much appreciated! 

K18 Forever ❤️

The serene ocean tide crawled ever closer towards Eighteen as she patiently roamed through the latest issue of her favourite weekly fashion magazine. Enjoying her mid-morning reading session, she mentally noted what items of clothing she pined to purchase and which ones she wished she could erase from existence.

“Seriously, who would want to be seen in that?" She vented to herself, squinting her eyes in disdain at the eccentric patterns on the outfit.

She flicked over to the next page, carefully readjusting her sunglasses. Well, they weren't exactly her sunglasses. She had successfully snuck them out of Krillin's bedroom while he was resting. It was a good thing that he was such a heavy sleeper, as well as being extremely generous with his belongings.

Little did Eighteen know that Krillin had awoken from his deep slumber and was now standing by the porch of Kame House. He took a deep breath, filling his lungs with the refreshing summer air before deflating his chest back to normal size. A content smile gradually etched itself across his dry lips; Krillin's infatuated eyes admiringly mused over Eighteen.

Sitting alone by the ocean's edge, she appeared as angelic as ever. Her face emitted a unique elegance unrivalled by any other. Krillin attentively observed Eighteen's subtle body language; her relaxed posture was a rare, yet pleasant sight. He decided to make his presence known, promptly advancing towards the shoreline.

The sound of Krillin's muted footsteps instantly caught Eighteen’s attention. Choosing to cast her magazine aside, Eighteen flicked her sunglasses to the bridge of her nose, fervently chewing on her bottom lip; he looked as fine as ever.

Despite his initial protests, she was so glad that Krillin acquiesced to her relentless insistence that he should grow out his jet black hair. Better yet, since the summer weather had come around, sightings of him without a top were becoming more and more frequent, permitting herself to gaze upon his well-toned muscles in all their splendour.

Sadly for Eighteen, Krillin had clothed himself this morning with a t-shirt that she had bought for him on their most recent trip to the mainland. Regardless of whether her little monk was topless or not, she didn't care what anyone said or thought about his appearance. To her, Krillin was simply stunning.

"Finally decided to get out of bed, uh?" Eighteen cordially greeted Krillin as he rooted himself on her left side. He retaliated swiftly with a kiss on her warm cheek.

“Well, you know me. If I ever get the chance to have a lay-in, I'll take it." He assuredly replied, spotting that his sunglasses were loosely hanging off of Eighteen's ears, "I see you've stolen my sunglasses again.”

"Hey!" Eighteen asserted, raising her arms in defence, "I didn't steal your sunglasses. I'm just borrowing them.”

"I ain't complaining." He then proceeded to straighten his sunglasses up for her, before adding, "You actually look kinda cute with them on.”

Without saying a word, Eighteen showed her appreciation of Krillin's kind comment with a habitual gesture. A gesture he didn't see all too often. But when he did, it meant the world to him.

"I've noticed you do that from time-to-time.”

"Do what?" She tentatively asked, feeling as if she had suddenly entered a "deer in the headlights" type situation.

"Don't worry. It's nothing bad." Krillin reassured her with a warm timbre in his voice, "I've just noticed that whenever I give you a compliment or if you see something you like, you have this tendency to needlessly brush your hair aside.”

Eighteen eyes immediately darted up to where her right hand was currently placed. It was exactly as Krillin described. She instantly felt the soft blonde tangles that ran between her fingers. In an effort to combat her self-consciousness, she instinctually moved her hand unto her lap.

"Have you seriously never noticed?" He enquired, watching Eighteen's face grow slightly perplexed.

"Not really, no. But if it's weird, I'll stop.”

"Weird?" Krillin answered calmly, pulling his knees up to his chest, "Take it from me. That hair thing you do is far from weird. It's just a quirky habit you have. That's all.”

“Habit?"

"Yeah. Everyone has them." Krillin added, lifting his eyes to the cloudless blue sky above him.

At that split-second, Eighteen's concerns morphed into curiosity. Now that she gave it some consideration, Krillin did have some fairly odd traits of his own. Realising this, Eighteen violently crashed her hands together with excitement. The resounding clash of her hands drew Krillin's eyes away from the empty sky and unto a far more captivating sight.

"You know, you sometimes start to laugh nervously when I stare at you." Eighteen astutely remarked.

Shaking his head from side-to-side, Krillin firmly disagreed with a great amount of confidence, "Erm- I believe you're imagining things because I'm pretty sure I've never done that before, babe." His confidence, however, was misplaced.

Eighteen silently folded the arms of Krillin's sunglasses, delicately resting them on top of her magazine.

"W-what are you doing?" His query reeked with diffidence.

Eighteen purposefully ignored him, electing to silently close the gap between them instead. Krillin dared not move, especially since Eighteen developed a kittenesque sheen in her eyes. She fearlessly pounced on him; Krillin willingly collapsed unto his back. The space between them was now non-existent. What quickly followed was inevitable.

"Ahh, damn it." He humbly admitted, "I guess you're right.”

"See," Eighteen gloated with raised eyebrows. She remained on top of him, resuming her point with a velvety inflexion, "and I think you laugh because you don't know what else to do when I have my eyes set on you.”

Krillin could provide no reply as strands of Eighteen's hair lightly tickled his besotted face. Her strong emphasis on the word, 'you' drew forth another excitable chuckle. Now that she had brought it to his attention, he couldn't stop himself. Nor did he want to.

Satisfied by the result, Eighteen distanced their proximity, if only by the smallest of margins. This gifted Krillin the chance to not only wipe off the soft sand from his back but also reveal another fascinating observation he made about Eighteen.

"Here's a good one!" Krillin's child-like enthusiasm gripped Eighteen, staring back him with a sense of anticipation, "You always make sure that the TV or radio volume is set at an even number.”

"You're kidding, right?" Eighteen answered him with a doubtful snicker.

"I am 100% serious. There have been times where I have deliberately set the volume at 19 and then I catch you changing it to 20 or 22-“

"Or 18?" She noted with a sense of irony.

“Exactly!"

"I can't say there's a valid explanation for it.”

"The only thing I can think of is that because of your name, you naturally prefer even numbers." Krillin's off-the-cuff reasoning technically made sense.

However, Eighteen wasn't fully convinced, logically stating, "If that's the case, then maybe my brother likes his volume set to an odd number.”

"That's gotta be true." He firmly agreed, "You should ask him the next time you see him.”

"Speaking of my brother, you two share a habit.”

"No way!" Krillin exclaimed with great elation, 'What is it!?”

"I wouldn't get too excited if I were you.” Eighteen warned him, hinting at the fact that this habit wasn't exactly a positive one, "You and Seventeen need to learn how to eat without talking at the same time.”

"Huh. I never would have imagined your brother doing something like that." Krillin remarked bemusedly. Even though he didn't know much about Eighteen's twin brother, he was relieved to discover that they did have something in common, even if it was as trivial as talking with their mouths full.

"Believe me, he's almost as bad as you." Eighteen slyly teased, sneakily resting her head on Krillin's shoulder. Sticking to the subject of her brother, she casually suggested to him, "Perhaps on my next visit to Seventeen's place, you could come with me.”

Eighteen almost lost her balance due to Krillin's sudden jolt. She fixed her eyes on him, studying the agitated expression which had rapidly overtaken him as he paced back and forth in front of her.

"D-do you think that's such a good idea?" Krillin responded apprehensively. This wasn't the first time the topic of Krillin meeting up with Seventeen had occurred. Whenever she mentioned it to him, he would quickly change the subject or brush it off with a fake smile. She decided it was time to tell it to him straight.

"What, so you don't want to meet him then?”

“N-no, I would like to meet him." Krillin unconvincingly replied.

Eighteen candidly returned with a stern tone, "Really? Because your face is telling me something completely different.”

Krillin halted in his tracks as Eighteen's words escaped her mouth. Disappointment followed her as she looked away from him, turning to face the transparent ocean.

Sitting back down on the sand, Krillin hoped he could clearly convey his anxious thoughts: "I really do want to meet your brother, Eighteen. I guess I'm just afraid that he’s gonna think that I'm not good enough for you. Or maybe we won't get along with each other.”

Eighteen's face perked up at Krillin's response. She could understand why he felt apprehensive towards her brother. Nevertheless, she desired to put his concerns to rest.

Taking a hold of his shaky hand, she sincerely reassured him, "Honey, you have no reason to be nervous. Seventeen is fully aware that we've been dating for a little while now and he seems pretty chilled about it. I mean even if he wasn't, I don't need his approval, or anybody else’s for that matter. I just think that we've been together long enough to pay him at least one visit from the two of us.”

"So, I don't have anything to worry about?" Krillin asked with a hint of courage in his voice.

Eighteen strongly shook her head, “None whatsoever. Besides, worst-case scenario, I’ll kick his ass and make sure he doesn’t even think about messing with you.”

Swiftly rising to his feet, Krillin boldly proclaimed, "Alright then! We better get going!”

"Go? Go where?”

"Well, I said that I wanted to meet your brother, didn't I?" Krillin clarified cheerfully, offering his right hand out towards Eighteen.

Gladly accepting Krillin's outstretched arm, she arose from the ground, asking with an ebullient expression, "You want to meet my brother right now?”

"Sure!" Krillin confirmed confidently, "I wanna do whatever makes you happy, Eighteen!"

His elegant blush was infectious; Eighteen's cheeks were being painted with an identical rose coloured hue. She tenderly caressed the sides of his face.

It simultaneously occurred to both Krillin and Eighteen that their impromptu decision to visit Seventeen was going to be a big step in their relationship. It was a step that neither of them could have even imagined taking when Eighteen first stepped foot inside Kame House. But they were so grateful that they had each other to take it.

As their bodies gently swayed, Eighteen inquisitively inquired, "Why are you so good to me, Krillin?"

The man in question instinctually released a nervous chuckle, before answering with a heartfelt resonance, "Because I love you.”

Neither of them knew for certain who exactly initiated the kiss. But one thing was obvious: neither of them cared. Their hands crawled around each other's bodies as their kisses grew more and more intense. It was a good thing Master Roshi and Oolong weren't around to see this. Krillin and Eighteen rarely got to physically express themselves since their housemates always stood around like vultures.

As Eighteen's fingers stealthily crept underneath his shirt to dance around the surface of his stomach, Krillin passionately pecked her neck, leaving little imprints of where his lips had been. It was yet another adorable idiosyncrasy Eighteen so dearly treasured about Krillin.

Soon enough, they carefully rested their foreheads against each other, leading them to stare intimately into each other's eyes. The exhilarating adrenaline which had thrust them into the moment was gradually settling down. Their pounding hearts were left playing catch up.

"Hey, Krillin?” Eighteen softly uttered, effortlessly attaining his gaze, "Before we leave, I just wanted to say thank you for doing this. You have no idea just how much this means to me.”

Little dimples appeared on Krillin's cheeks at the sight of Eighteen's signal of satisfaction.

"You just did your hair thing again.” He eagerly noted.

Eighteen embraced her little quirk proudly, "I know.”

"So, should we get ready to leave, babe?” Krillin asked, reaching down to grab Eighteen’s magazine and his sand-covered sunglasses.

"Hold on a second! I think I’ve forgotten something!”

“Huh? What did you forge-" Cutting off Krillin's sentence, Eighteen boldly pressed her lips onto his. She simply couldn't resist the alluring taste of Krillin's sweet kiss any longer. He gladly welcomed the interruption; he didn't mind being silenced if this was his reward for doing so.

Practising a rare instance of self-control, Eighteen gradually withdrew from their brief kiss, playfully stating, "Okay, now I'm ready.”

With every passing day, it seemed that Krillin and Eighteen managed to discover new things they adored about each other. From big gestures to small habits, each one brought them closer together and caused their love to deepen.

Taking flight to the endless blue skies above them, they joyously marvelled to themselves at where exactly their relationship was taking them. Their desired destination excited them. But the journey to arrive there excited them all the more.

THE END ❤️

#krillin #android18 #android eighteen #k18 #dragon ball z #dbz #dragon ball #db #android 17 #chestnut family #dbz fanfiction #k18forever

[deviljho]

hs on main but

i’ve been thinking a lot about post retcon vriska and the simply epic vriska vs (vriska) confrontation...

i think that before i actually reread the comic last year, my takeaway of it from hussie’s commentary in the books and just general fan analysis online was that it’s vriska showing her whole ass re: her deep seated self loathing & inability to self actualize and move past her trauma. which is actually a defining aspect of her personality (bc as much as she likes to pretend this isn’t the case it dictates so much of what she does) lmao. in the face of a version of herself, in this case, (vriska), who has done some of the work to unpack her issues and is “happy”, vriska goes sicko mode and vents that frustration on her dead alternate self. but i think it goes even deeper than that and i can’t stop thinking about it so allow me to go off for a bit: 

first off i think it’s crazy to claim (vriska) is happy or working past her childhood issues...she’s become more aware of them, sure, which lets be real is HUGE for any vriska lol but her existence as a ghost forces her to experience an inertia which prevents her from actually taking that awareness and doing anything with it. this is especially highlighted in her relationship with meenah, who is too much of a self absorbed enabler to really help her. having given up on their heroic cause, they start dating because, it’s something to do. but it becomes completely stagnant, just like (vriska) herself, because there’s literally nothing there for (vriska) to bounce off of. vriska needs more than just someone to let her talk, and feel heard to grow and change as a person imo, but i do think being given the specific environment to do so obviously has changed her, just not necessarily for “the better”. 

contrast this with retcon vriska, who is for all intents and purposes now the “real” vriska (and indeed, vriska herself clings to this idea). brought back from her death by terezi for a variety of reasons, mainly that terezi personally regrets killing her and is in love with her LOL but setting aside my vrisrezi agenda for a moment, terezi’s successful use of her seer of mind powers confirms in-story that bringing her back has strategic merit, and from a meta standpoint, narratively i felt like it really worked to reveal that vriska’s presence was needed to keep the meteor crew from falling apart, not to mention her psychic powers playing an important role in protecting the whole team from jade being possessed. i know some people dislike the retcon, but i love it for this simply epic twist tbh. 

anyways...this retcon vriska is someone who canonically obsessed over their plan to defeat lord english for three years and had planned it all out to the last detail, she’s clearly taken the reigns on directing the team overall, and talks multiple times about “not having time for relationships” with the exception of being moirails with terezi which lets be real, is a hard friendzoning of their messy, quadrants-transcending relationship but again i digress... 

vriska was brought back with a purpose, To Be The Hero That The Story Needs, and she’s more fixated than ever with completing this task, probably because in the epic story that she larps being a part of in her mind, successfully completing this mission is to empirically prove that she was worth bringing back, despite all the harm she’s done (and pretends not to feel badly about). vriska also desperately wants her suffering to MEAN something. we see this in her pesterlogs with john before she’s about to fight jack noir; she passes off having her lusus as a task “only really strong” children are given. i think this is why seeing (vriska) enrages her; she’s being confronted with the version of herself who she perceived as making the selfish choice to fight jack, who “deserved” to die for doing so, and on top of all that this (vriska) is now just sitting around in paradox spacing doing nothing and proving nothing to anyone?? i think it honestly has a lot less to do with (vriska) and a lot more to do with vriska obsessively reassuring herself that she’s doing the right thing, that she HAS to go through with sacrificing herself in a big epic moment for the good of everyone else because anything short of that means she’s failed at redeeming herself. vriska cannot accept that there is a version of herself who is okay with just “existing”, without deriving meaning and purpose from the abuse she suffered as a child and inflicted on her friends and countless innocent bystanders. 

 it’s markedly different from, for example, jade’s confrontation with her dead dream self which really is her being forced to look back on a younger version of herself who is (obviously) less experienced and or/traumatized. and i think it’s different from dave & davesprite’s interactions too, the small amount of them we get to see beyond like, ironic jokes. but imo this is bc jade and dave are markedly different from vriska. dave openly rejects the notion of glory and heroism, and avoids it whenever possible. jade is continuously forced to suffer for the sake of the timeline and the narrative, but is shown passively accepting this as simply things that “needed to happen”. personally imo in jade’s case i wanna chalk that up to bad writing on hussie’s part; it kind of sucks that jade never gets to unpack that in homestuck proper.

anyways. tbh the existence of both of those dead alternate selves imo further proves my theory that (vriska) is far from happy; the experience of being a dead alternate self is obviously extremely unsettling and depersonalizing. vriska is terrified of dying; her entire childhood was defined by this terror in a lot of ways and by the end of the session she’s died multiple times, pretty gruesomely. i think her hysterical woman(tm) rant is way more about psyching herself up and her own fears of failure than it is about seeing a supposedly “happy” version of herself. i don’t even think vriska can conceive of such a thing for herself; she has no sense of normalcy or purpose after the session to return to the way john, or like, kanaya has. 

also interesting to note here is meenah as a foil for both of them; immediately after this fight meenah ditches (vriska) to join up with vriska after admitting (with some regret) that she’s a bad person. meenah doesn’t struggle at all with the self image issues vriska has, and though she may feel some guilt over ditching (vriska) just like she expressed guilt to john about becoming the condescence in a different timeline because it meant that she would probably end up killing all her friends back when (vriska) was first trying to rally up a ghost army, she ultimately acts in her self interest and doesn’t really lose sleep over it. in fact she will readily admit that she’s being an asshole and still do whatever she wants. contrast this with all of vriska’s grandstanding about not caring that she comes off as annoying and overbearing, and her overcompensation for that in the form of confidently insisting that the others “need” her.

my final comment is that,...coming back to the vrisrezi of it all, it’s obvious from terezi’s final pesterlogs to vriska before [s] terezi: remem8er that there was a ton of stuff left unsaid between them and presumably between vriska and the rest of the meteor crew as well because vriska spent 90% of the time bossing them around, either about their plans for the new session or just in general in what i like to think of as her loving nagging scorpio way lol. terezi clearly feels like she’s alone in “needing” vriska because even their relationship post retcon is strained, and vriska is so wrapped up in making plans and making sure she gets it right this time, and is already planning to die again out in paradox space. and then after all of this, her fate after her big epic moment is left offscreen for us to wonder about. which in and of itself is pretty narratively tragic for a character like vriska. it makes me honestly wonder how much of this they’re going to unpack in hs2 because tbh it’s pretty juicy. i would love to see a huge confrontation between terezi and vriska about vriska’s choices post retcon...and just in general what life post-session would look like for a person like her. through the epilogues and hs^2 we’ve seen what “normal” life has been like for terezi, and she obviously can’t let go of the past (or vriska. AUGH)...so who’s to say what’s in store for them? i wish we lived in a world where we would eventually find out, and we could see them continue to be each other’s foils in unpacking that but i don’t know if i have faith that the writers will explore it in a satisfying way lmao.

anyways that’s all i have, thanks for reading this if you did read it. i love vriska

#vriska meta #thats all this is really....i have more hs thoughts since i finished rereading it in november but tbh this is the condensed core of them #the vriska of it all... #homestuck meta

[stfredsa]

HC / DESIRES etc.

TW : sex work / forced prostitution, abuse, general n.sfw themes .

although everyone and their mother knows about fred’s issues with INTIMACY / PHYSICAL CLOSENESS in a romantic sense, she is actually a VERY sexual person. not only because sex ( and flirting, seduction in general ) is one of the only languages she actually feels comfortable using for the comfort of CLOSENESS ( she desperately yearns to have someone close, but the commitment of it terrifies her: hence casual sex as a mean to gain WARMTH without holding the responsibility of it ), but also because her ENJOYMENT of it is still somewhat new : as if sex as FREDDIE DAWSON ( sought because of her own pleasure and on her own initiative ) was something entirely different from sex as FREDDIE GALLAGHER / DICKINSON ( imposed upon her / pleasure expected FROM her, very seldom given ). it means she’s also still discovering what she’s into and what she dislikes ( it also means she’s open to pretty much all forms of experimenting, as long as it isn’t outright DANGEROUS or crossing hard limits ).

first off, she’s not opposed to ROUGHNESS, in fact prefers it when things get a little nasty and there’s just a bit of bruises in the morning. it has to be ULTRA-CONSENSUAL, of course, but it’s fair to say she likes to PLAY ROUGH. she’s feisty, too — she couldn’t be qualified as just a “ sub ” because, as much as she likes to let her partners take control, she really dislikes being docile / lying back. freddie likes to “ leave a mark ” — be it biting or scratching, having sex with her is not a calm experience, by a long shot. 

( anyone who knows of her past might think she’d prefer her partners to be extremely delicate — that’s not her preference at all, as reclaiming her sexual activity has helped her gain at least a shade of STRENGTH back, and being made to feel like she’s “fragile” only ends up pissing her off. she VENTS a lot of her feelings through sex, and needs it to be somewhat cathartic to truly appreciate it. plus, surprisingly enough, sex with jimmy was SCARCE — he’d often enjoy saying she was ‘spoiled goods’ / ‘not worthy of being fucked’ and sleep with someone else instead. when he did, in fact, have sex with her, he seemed to only want to do it out of pity, out of an obligation of sorts — occasional partners who are this GENTLE with her just remind her of what he used to say, and it makes her angry to no end. of course, with deeply committed relationships, this can change, and SOFTNESS, paired with closeness / firmness, is something she can actually appreciate. soft emotional sex that’s intense more because of the feelings involved rather than her partner being actually delicate is ALWAYS encouraged ).

although she’s into SOME aspects of b.dsm ( being told what to do, or having someone control her movements ) there are some she wouldn’t touch with a ten feet pole, i.e. anything that has to do with corporal punishment, especially slaps / smacking, paddling, etc. even more, she absolutely LOATHES being restrained and will call out her safeword whenever a partner suggests binding her in any form. 

this will be part of a bigger headcanon too, but NAME CALLING is also absolutely a hard limit for her. PET NAMES, on the other hand, will absolutely make her come undone in a second.

she’s REALLY into giving oral. like, really. it might have a few psychological factors in it, how she only truly feels satisfied when pleasing people in any form, but it’s a kind of sexual act that she offers FREELY to her partners, never really has to be solicited ( and, truth be told, she’s quite spectacular at it ). on the other hand, she has barely ever received oral — and never to completion.

a good indicator of how much she’s enjoying herself is the noise she makes. she’s usually extremely QUIET, bites down her lips almost to the point of bleeding in order to not let out a sound ( in the beginning it was a way for her to never betray sexual pleasure when she was working at the motel — afterwards, beginning to work as a bartender and often entertaining quickies in the restrooms, it just became a necessity ). when she’s REALLY enjoying herself, however, freddie can be LOUD — there’s a specific threshold few people have ever passed where she loses herself completely and would probably need to be shut up ‘cause, like, really.

although choking is another hard limit ( read this for an explanation, warning : mentions of abuse / domestic abuse ), with partners she’s REALLY close to emotionally, a hand on her neck might just drive her over the edge — not pressing, not choking, just lying around her neck. sort of a reminder that they see her weaknesses, and they won’t take advantage of them — that she’s safe.

she’s BIG on foreplay and actually greatly enjoys everything leading up to the act itself, especially kissing / making out.

actually, she’s also a HUGE TEASE and enjoys making her partners uneasy / horny in public FAR too much. ( but she also enjoys being teased to death, so ).

with occasional partners, she tends to LEAVE or kick them out as soon as they’re both finished. occasionally she’ll allow someone to stay over for the night but then tends to still kick them out as soon as the sun rises, just so there is no misunderstanding. when it comes to people she actually has feelings for ( once she’s actually addressed and acknowledged this feelings, so it happens once every 122 years really ), she really enjoys cuddling / sleeping in / general morning shenanigans. again: make out sessions are really her favorite, especially in the morning.

she can get… creative with locations. big on beds, of course, but also cars, restrooms, the kitchen, the washing machine, an alley, honestly — take your pick. she doesn’t mind.

this is part of a larger set of hcs so i’ll only mention it in passing but if you have sex with her and she smiles often, laughs often, teases you and is playful more than anything? yeah, that means she’s head over heels.

#HC —— sometimes i feel like an inland ocean. #FILE —— maybe i've always been more comfortable in chaos. #nsft / #abuse / #ptsd / #i had to repost this because it took me 78 years to find it again but #it's relevant to this day

[just-come-baek]

Wedding Fever 5 | final

Pairing: Baekhyun x Reader

Themes: s m u t | fluff | angst | DRAMA | wedding!au | friends to lovers!au | SLOWBURN

Word count: 13.1k

Summary: Baekhyun is the best man, and I am the maid of honor at our friends’ wedding. Although should we be excited about our friends getting married, we seem to complain a lot more every time we meet for another preparation. Maybe it’s a bit fanciful of me to think that, but I hope, somewhere between choosing flowers and venting about the reception prep, he’ll like me just as I like him.

Warnings: infidelity, profanity, sexual themes (oral female receiving, cock riding, dirty talk if you squint, pretty vanilla), extreme cuteness, unpleasant and problematic confrontations, usage of alcohol, manipulative behavior,

A/N sorry for taking so much time. I hope you enjoy the final chapter, and maybe check out my future stories with Baekhyun.

“I’m hungry,” I announced randomly when Baekhyun and I almost walked past McDonald’s. I had barely eaten that day, and although I had made a resolution not to eat at fast food joints, I couldn’t deny I craved some French fries. “Let’s go,” I said, pulling Baekhyun with me, ignoring his protests.

“A bit bossy of you,” Baekhyun answered, following behind me. At this time of the night, there were barely any customers, so with ease, I ordered two servings of fries, and Baekhyun paid. I had left my purse with Jiwoo, and besides, no matter how you look at it, it was somewhat our first date. Maybe, it wasn’t perfect, but it was Baekhyun, so I felt contended.

“What are you thinking about?” I asked when I placed the tray with our fries between us, clumsily opening the packaging of ketchup. Baekhyun just sat there, looking at me, smiling brightly. Did I have something on my face?

“I’m just curious what else are you going to surprise me with further the way,” Baekhyun replied honestly, leaning forward, his chin resting in his hand, his arm being perched on the table. “It’s been like ten minutes since I told you my feelings, and it’s been great. I mean… you know… hanging out with you like that without holding myself back.”

“I had no I idea I surprised you at all,” I admitted honestly. It was strange that Baekhyun found me so intriguing. If one of my friends had to describe me, I’d probably be a disappointingly one-dimensional character. There’s nothing unique about me. I just work 9 to 5, watch trashy television, eat lots of potato chips, and drink too much coke and wine. “I’m pretty basic if you ask me.”

“And if you ask me, I can’t agree with you.” Baekhyun retorted, and I shook my head, stuffing my mouth with fries. “Yes, you must be a masochist if you like doing these things to yourself, but at least, you’re not ashamed of it. And that’s something I really respect about you. You don’t pretend someone you’re not, and I can’t wait to see more of it.”

“You better eat your fries,” I snickered, getting a bit embarrassed by the amount of attention he just gave me. Honestly, I preferred when we were bickering. Now, it just felt as if he placed me on the pedestal for me to be worshipped. I wasn’t used to that kind of treatment, and I needed plenty of time to get accustomed.

“Oh, trust me, I’m gonna eat mine and a half of yours. I'm the one who paid after all,” Baekhyun shot back, and I grinned, finally interacting with the Baekhyun who I fell for. I loved him the most when he was carefree and a little bit of silly. It’s refreshing to hang out with him, especially when everyone around me tended to be overly stressed all the time.

“Not if I eat mine first,” I challenged, and then Baekhyun leaned to steal one of my fries even though his weren’t even touched. “Oh, that’s how you wanna play? Bring it,” I added, mirroring his actions. Giggling, I stole some of his fries and put them into my mouth. “How it’s possible that yours taste better? This is crazy.”

“Mine were fried with love,” Baekhyun concluded, and I almost choked at the absurdity of his statement. Yes, the female cashier smiled at him fondly, but still, our fries were out of the same old oil. As much as he’d like to, he didn’t get any special treatment tonight.

“When are you gonna learn to bullshit better?” I teased, and Baekhyun looked at me in an artificial and over the top angry way. Although I could tell he was only fooling around, his angry face was convincing and stern. “Gee, don’t make a face like that, I’m almost scared.”

“And I’m fully offended,” Baekhyun said seriously, but after a second he burst out laughing, and I started giggling uncontrollably, realizing the alcohol didn’t fully leave my body yet. The remains lingered, intensifying my reactions. “OK, maybe not fully, but mildly.”

“I’m a tease. That revelation surprises you, doesn’t it?” I said shyly, and Baekhyun just grinned.

“I had a hunch, but I can assure you, you’re no competition to me, baby.”

“Wow,” I interjected, sounding shook. “Did you just ‘baby’ me?

“I think I did. What are you gonna do about it?” Baekhyun challenged, and I didn’t say anything, feeling how much cheeks burnt. It only took him one word to make me blush. How embarrassing was it? “You like it, don’t even try to deny it.”

“I do, but I’d rather have you called me a princess,” I said boldly, having no refrain in voicing my inner desires. I had imagined Baekhyun calling me affectionately, using my favorite pet name, but now, when it could happen, I didn’t know I was ready to hear it. “I’m full,” I added, as I pushed my tray away, hoping to dodge the intense atmosphere around us.

“You barely touched it,” Baekhyun remarked, amazed how quickly I satisfied my hunger. “But okay, let’s go, I just want you to drink some water and go to sleep.” He added, and my heart melted when I heard him. Nobody has ever cared about me so much. What did I do to deserve him?

“Actually...” I started, wanting to tell him about the secondary purpose of organizing Jiwoo's surprise bachelorette party. “It’s pretty embarrassing to admit, but I pledged to leave the club with a man with whom I was going to have a sex marathon. I struggled too long with a dry spell, so yeah… I made a promise to myself to leave the club with someone for the sole reason of having lots of sex.” I explained, and Baekhyun choked on his fries, not expecting me to put the truth in such a straightforward way. “So yeah, you were literally the one who dragged me out of there, so now you owe me at least two mind-blowing orgasms.” I finished, and I could swear that people sitting at the next table could hear me. I didn’t care, though. Baekhyun had confessed to me, and now it was time to make up for the lost time.

“Are you serious?” Baekhyun asked bewildered that I could actually leave the club with a stranger only because he could potentially satiate my needs. “You’re joking. You’re gorgeous; it’s not possible for you to be under the dry spell.” Baekhyun reasoned, trying to justify his surprise.

“I don’t know whether you’re shocked or shied away,” I said, not sure how to read his expression. Was he disappointed in my hedonic resolve? I just needed some intimacy, and since I had no idea how he perceived me, finding someone else to cater it for me was the only solution I had left.

“I’m probably both,” Baekhyun admitted, looking straight with an absent gaze. I observed his face, trying to find a change in his mimics, but he only furrowed his eyebrows, being deep in his thoughts. “You really shocked me. What would happen if I didn’t come clean? I could lose my only chance to be with you. I can’t believe you were so close from being snatched away from me.”

“Don’t put that much thought into it. None of it happened, so it’s pointless to dwell on it. Everything’s fine,” I replied, smiling brightly. Everything that I wished to happen became a reality, and I couldn’t be any happier. But then, my good mood vanished, being replaced with awful thoughts of Jiwoo’s infidelity. Hongbin didn’t deserve any of it, and when I wondered what was going to happen with their relationship, I was angry at Jiwoo for ruining it.

“Yeah, I guess,” Baekhyun agreed, sending me one of his beautiful genuine smiles. He really seemed happy when being with me, and I couldn’t imagine how hard he must’ve held himself back. And how could he do that to me? Only if I had known, only if he had given me a sign, I’d force him for a confrontation. I had only needed a single clue that he was interested. None of us made a move until tonight, and our cowardice game had been played way longer than necessary. “Let’s just get you home.”

***

Frankly, I was a bit nervous about going into Baekhyun’s apartment. I had never been there in the past, and this night there was already full with first times. When we reached it, Baekhyun fought with the lock, and considering my promise of a wild sex session, he was probably a bit afraid that I’d jump his bones as soon as he’d open the doors.

None of it happened, though.

I wanted to, but I had waited long enough, so an hour or a day wouldn’t make a difference to me.

The moment he pushed the doors open, he moved to the side, letting me in first.

“I can’t believe you’ve never mentioned you had a dog!” I exclaimed when I felt the typical smell. A few seconds later, Baekhyun flicked the lights on, and I saw the most adorable Corgi ever. Excitedly, it ran up to me, resting its front paws on my shins.

Quickly, I crouched so I could pet its soft fur, but also because I was wearing fishnets, and I didn’t want the dog to ruin them.

“I wanted you to like me because of me, and not because of my dog.” Baekhyun joked when he took off his jacket and hung it on the rock. “This little monster is the cutest dog ever.”

“You’re absolutely right,” I agreed with a quiet chuckle, as I rubbed his dog which now was lying on its back, demanding my attention. “It’s adorable, but you have nothing to worry about. I like you the same with or without a pet.”

“So you do like me,” he said with a huge grin, when he sat down on the couch’s hand rest, staring at me petting his dog. “Glad to know that,” he added, and I rolled my eyes at him; he was adorable, and I just couldn’t help myself. It was like I was living a fairytale. “OK, make yourself at home, and I’ll get you something to drink.”

I was already swept off my feet, why did he still try to impress me?

Not that I minded.

Kicking off my shoes, I lay down on the couch, and Baekhyun’s dog stretched out on the floor, so I could still pet him. Closing my eyes, I moved my hand through the dog’s fur until I dozed off. The couch was incredibly comfortable, and I didn’t even realize when I fell asleep.

The next thing I remember was Baekhyun waking me up to drink the water, change into pajamas he prepared for me, and go to bed. However, he didn’t do it in a gentle way but quite violently, shaking me out of the slumber. Before he had acted like a sweet boyfriend, but right now, he had no mercy, waking me up in the most annoying way possible.

“Hey, sleepyhead, what about that sex marathon that you wanted?” Baekhyun teased, having so much fun seeing my great plan fall through over a minor nap. Ten minutes ago I was ready to have sex, but now, when I closed my eyes, I needed to get back to sleep.

“You’re right; let’s do it,” I answered him, being on the edge of reality and dream.

“You’re incredible,” Baekhyun said, chuckling at the fact that despite being tired, I was still determined to get into his pants. “Just drink this, and then go to the bathroom to wash yourself and change into more comfortable clothes, and I’ll make the bed.” He asked me, but when I didn’t react, he just grabbed my hand and pulled me up.

“I hate that side of you,” I groaned when Baekhyun handed me a glass of water.

“I’d rather hear you complain now than in the morning completely hungover,” Baekhyun said, being genuinely concerned about my wellbeing, and I rolled my eyes, gulping down the water. “OK, here.” He handed me a set of clean clothes to change. “You can go and change yourself, or I can throw you over my shoulder and carry you there. How it is gonna be?”

“I really hate that side of you,” I whined once again but obeyed his orders. I knew I was going to regret it if I didn’t listen to him. Baekhyun was my voice of reason at the moment - he knew what was best for me.

When I stood up, Baekhyun spanked me playfully, and I swiftly spun around, sticking out my tongue. We both could be mischievous. “You’re gonna thank me when you wake up!” Baekhyun hollered just before I closed the bathroom doors behind me.

***

I woke up early in the morning. It was a few minutes past 7 o’clock, and I wasn’t surprised by it. Whenever I slept in not my bed, I had a very light sleep, and I woke up quite early and well rested, and that’s how I was feeling right now.

I was lying in Baekhyun’s bed, wrapped in a thick duvet with Baekhyun sleeping soundly beside me. Carefully, I turned around to face him. He looked great, and if I had a chance to wake up to this view every day, without any doubt, I’d be the luckiest woman on Earth.

Remembering how violently he had woken me up earlier, I placed my hand on his shoulder and tried to shake him awake in a similar manner.

He deserved it.

“Good morning to you, too,” Baekhyun whispered in his morning voice, as he turned his back to me, trying to get back to sleep. I guess we aren’t that different, after all.

“And you had the audacity to literally pull me up,” I whined, lying on back, staring at the ceiling, thinking of another approach of waking him up. “I can’t believe you’ve done it.”

Suddenly, Baekhyun turned to me, propping on his elbow beside him, resting his left hand on my side. “I did what I had to do. I forced you to drink water, and now, you don’t feel hungover, do you?” As much as I didn’t want to, I had to admit that he was right.

“I don’t, but you didn’t have to manhandle me,” I argued, trying to tease him back.

“So… what do you want to do today?”

“I don’t know. Are you asking me out on a date?” I inquired, staring into Baekhyun’s eyes, trying not to grin like a teenage girl when having her first kiss.

“I am,” Baekhyun said proudly, any sign of shyness from yesterday completely vanished. We were lying in a bed, teasing each other playfully, and our interaction felt so natural. Almost as if we already passed that awkward phase over the night. “So… what do you want to do? I’m fine with everything. If you ask me, we can even stay all day in pajamas, and watch TV, and order takeout.”

“Mm… that sounds tempting, but I have a better idea,” I said, and Baekhyun cocked his eyebrow, curious what I had in mind. “I’ll go to Jiwoo’s to get my stuff back, then I’ll make myself look presentable, and then we’ll meet at the bowling alley. What do you think?”

“What’s wrong in the way you look now?” Baekhyun wondered as he stared at my face, trying to spot my flows. “The way you looked in these fishnets and this skirt was amazing, but now, all dressed in my sweatpants and my T-shirt? Princess, it’s an instant boner.”

“Oh my God, you didn’t say that!” I said, a bit taken aback with his bold compliment.

“But, Princess, I just did, and I meant it,” Baekhyun repeated and leaned forward to peck my chin. “I’d rather stay at home with you, but let’s do what you want. But why bowling, though?”

“That’s embarrassing,” I said, trying to hide my face under the duvet. “I’ve never gone bowling, and I’ve always wanted to have a date at the bowling alley.”

“OK, let’s go there. I’ll teach you how it’s done.” Baekhyun answered confidently.

“Just be aware that I’m a natural at most of the sports. Just don’t be surprised if I destroy you.”

“That’s not happening, Princess,” Baekhyun whispered, gently kissing the corner of my lips. “But if you’re so confident in your skills which you don’t have yet, we can bet. Whoever wins, can decide what we do after bowling. What do you say?”

“It’s on.”

***

When I was ready to leave, (which was around noon) Baekhyun offered himself to give me a ride to Jiwoo’s apartment. Surprisingly, Jiwoo was still asleep, so I asked Hongbin to give me my purse. Every time I glanced at him, I wanted to tell him the truth about what Jiwoo had done last night, but I bit my tongue. I had to think it over; maybe there still was a chance for them to make it up, and I didn’t want to deprive them of it with my rushed confession.

I would think about it after my date with Baekhyun. Jiwoo’s mistakes couldn’t affect my life to that extent, so I decided to spend some time with Baekhyun before I’d get involved in the drama I was going to stir in Jiwoo’s relationship. They were my friends, and I cared for them, but now it was time for me to be selfish, to focus on my happiness.

With Baekhyun, we agreed to meet at the bowling alley around sevenish; it gave me a lot of time to take a long relaxing bath, put on a delicate make-up, and choose a suitable outfit for our second date.

No matter how much time I had spent with Baekhyun today and yesterday, it still felt a bit surreal. Yesterday, I had wanted to fuck a stranger, but today I was getting ready for a date with my crush. I just couldn’t believe how many things had happened in the past two days.

Baekhyun wanted to pick me up and go to the bowling alley together, but I was stubborn, insisting on meeting there. I wanted him so much, so I feared we might not even leave my apartment, last minute deciding to stay in, fucking each other into oblivion.

Because of traffic, I was a bit later than I wanted to, but Baekhyun wasn’t angry at me. Before my arrival, he only managed to rent a pair of shoes for him. “I’m sorry,” I said when I ran up to him. As soon as he heard my voice, he spun around and greeted me with his radiant smile.

“Hi, there,” Baekhyun said, pressing another peck on my chin. Why does he keep kissing me there? The gesture felt innocent, and it slowly started to drive me insane. “Wow, I see you’re trying to impress someone,” he added when he studied my outfit. It was a simple combination of a shirt and skinny jeans, and it seemed it caught his attention. After that playful spanks he had given me, I had a hunch he had a thing for cute butts, so it was an easy decision to put a pair of tight trousers.

“No, not really,” I spoke casually, shrugging off the indirect compliment. “I just put the first thing I found in my closet.” It was a blatant lie, and Baekhyun knew it, but none of us really cared. “You look good, too,” I added when I checked him out. He was wearing a pair of casual jeans, and a V-neck T-shirt, and he looked insanely good; out-of-my-league kind of good.

“OK, just change your shoes, I want to destroy you,” Baekhyun spoke eagerly, excitedly hurrying me.

Our date was exactly the way I imagined. Even the male character was the same. Baekhyun explained me all the rules and the techniques I needed to know in order to win our bet. Moreover, he used every chance he had to touch me, and I couldn’t complain. I enjoyed it too much.

His experience was evident, but my natural talent at sports showed, too. However, overall, he won, but only because he was distracting me whenever it was my turn. Nonetheless, my skills were impressive for a first-timer.

“OK, you won, what do you want to do now?” I asked as we sat by our table to finish our beers. I had so much fun; I could stay up with Baekhyun the entire night, as I couldn't care any less about work on Monday.

“Actually, I didn’t think that through. You seemed so confident about your natural talent, I was sure you were going to win.” This time it was his turn to lie to me so I would feel slightly better. He really knew how to sweet talk.

“Frankly, it doesn’t matter that much to me,” I answered honestly, and Baekhyun gave me one of his widest smiles. “I’d have fun with you even if you took me to a yodeling show.”

“OK, maybe let’s do that on another date.” Baekhyun dismissed my terrible idea, and I agreed with him. “What about getting a drink? We could sit down and just talk. We haven’t properly discussed that thing between us. What do you think?” It was considerate of him wanting to know my opinion, but honestly, I didn’t like talking about my feelings. It was difficult for me, and I knew it was going to be twice as difficult to open up like that in front of Baekhyun; especially when our romantic feelings for each other would be the hot topic.

“OK, let’s do that,” I replied reluctantly, smiling at him. It was going to require lots of energy, but it had to be done. Baekhyun and I could finally start a fantastic relationship, and I didn’t want to squander it due to problems with speaking up my feelings. Baekhyun was worth the most painful torture and a simple conversation with him wasn’t a big price for what I was going to get in return.

When on the way to the pub, I was coming up with scenarios how our conversation could go wrong, but thankfully, Baekhyun made it ridiculously easy to talk about it. Though the place was quite packed with people, we managed to find a small table just for the two of us. Once seated, Baekhyun asked me what I wanted before he left to the counter to get us the drinks.

The anticipation for Baekhyun’s return kept me stressed; I was playing with my fingers, nervously looking around, trying to come up with a backup plan if I screwed everything up. However, the moment he came back to our table with our drinks and his warm smile, I knew that everything was going to be just fine.

“You know what? You’re so adorable,” Baekhyun stated, as he sat down, setting my drink in front of me. “You told my parents that I took you to the bowling alley on our first date. It’s beyond me how I could forget it.” He explained with a nervous smile. “But then, I kicked your ass like I said I would.”

“I said that then, and I’m going to say that again.” I giggled, taking a sip of my cocktail. “You cheated!”

“I did not,” Baekhyun remarked, and then we argued passionately for about next ten minutes why giving me heart-eyes had distracted me and why it should’ve been considered unfair.

Later, when our drinks were half drunk, I was relaxed enough to voice my feelings and expectations regarding our relationship. Wow, our relationship. It sounded lovely.

I told him everything; how much I used to pine for him, how much I looked forward to seeing him on the wedding preparations, or how I enjoyed his company. And Baekhyun did the same, and when he was finished, my mouth hurt due to all that excessive grinning.

“I was so afraid of this conversation, but now, I’m relieved,” I confessed, finishing my cocktail. With Baekhyun next to me, it was easy. Everything with him was easy.

“Yeah, me too,” he added, placing his hands on top of mine. “So let me escort you home. It’s already late, and you have work tomorrow. I don’t want you to be all grumpy tomorrow because of me.”

“As if that could ever be the case,” I said, rolling my eyes at him.

***

Being ever so gentlemanly, Baekhyun walked me home, saying it’s one of boyfriend’s duties to make sure the girlfriend gets home safely, and though I was self-sufficient and fully capable of not killing myself on my way back, I let Baekhyun accompany me.

When we were standing in front of the door, he leaned and kissed my chin chastely. OK, what the hell was that? It was adorable for the few first times, but now, I was annoyed.

“Why are you kissing me like that?” I asked boldly, not even trying to hide how it frustrated me. With my arms folded across my chest, I stared at Baekhyun, demanding answers. Sheepishly, he smiled, evidently troubled with my inquiry.

“Don’t get me wrong, Princess,” he started, intentionally manipulating me with the sly usage of my favorite pet name. I loved it when it rolled off Baekhyun’s tongue, but I wanted to be kissed properly, and I wasn’t going to let him leave me with my needs unsatisfied. “It’s just… hmm… I kiss you like that because… I know I won’t be able to pull away if I kiss you the way I want to.”

“You’re really stupid if you think I’d let you pull away,” I replied, chuckling. Maybe, I sounded needy, but we had wasted too much time to beat around the bush. “I don’t know how you imagined it, but I’m not going to wait for our third date to do it. I’ve waited enough, and I want you right now,” I confessed, taking a step forward, so my nose almost touched Baekhyun’s.

“You really mean it,” Baekhyun whispered, letting me kiss him. My hands instantly cupped his cheeks, as I pressed my lips against his. The kiss was slow – I was taking me time, getting used to his taste. “I’m so stupid for making you wait,” he spoke against my lips, and I only hummed in agreement before I nipped his bottom lip greedily.

Getting rid of all inhibitions, Baekhyun placed his hands on my hips, pressing me against the door. He was impatient, passionate, and desperate to feel me; hurriedly, he pulled my shirt out of my jeans, wanting to touch my soft skin.

With raw passion, he kissed me, and I moaned into his mouth as soon as I felt his hands roaming upward to my bra. It was finally happening! Tightly, Baekhyun was pressed against me, and I couldn’t help myself but grabbed his cute butt and yanked him against me.

“I want you so much,” Baekhyun muttered, as he ground his hips against mine. Sensually, he kissed my chin and my neck, leaving a wet trace on my skin. “You don’t have any idea how much,” he added, and I shivered when I felt his shallow breath on my wet neck. Oh God, Baekhyun’s such a horndog! “I could fuck you all night.”

“Oh, Baekhyun,” I moaned when he sucked a hickey on my collarbone. “I’ve waited for you to do it for so long, I might even let you,” I breathed out as I enjoyed Baekhyun's ministrations.

We were just making out, but it made me so lightheaded as if I had drunk a whole bottle of champagne by myself. I wasn’t thinking straight; right now, Baekhyun was the centre of my universe; my time, my energy – everything – belonged to him.

“Oh, please, I can’t wait any longer,” Baekhyun whined, and I unwillingly let go of his firm butt, so I could fish my keys out of my purse. “I want to undress you… touch you… feel you.” Baekhyun whispered against my skin, as he undid two first buttons of my shirt. “You’re so damn soft,” he added before he dove into my cleavage, gently nipping my breasts, making me moan.

“Baekhyun, seriously, how the hell have you been restraining yourself?” I asked, being amazed of his self-control; he had used to ignore me like a plague, but right now, I felt as if I was his oxygen which keeps him alive. “You’re such a horndog!” I chuckled, pushing him away quite harshly.

“It may sound cheesy, but when we kissed for the first time,” Baekhyun started, watching me unlock the door. (Though I was standing backward, I could swear I felt his eyes on my butt.) “I don’t know how to put it in words, but I want to say that your kiss felt so, so good that I knew… I just knew that you’re one in a million. That you’re the only one for me.”

“You were right,” I giggled, as I pushed the doors open. “It does sound cheesy; you’re cheesy.” I said, but Baekhyun didn’t even try to fight with me on that; he just grabbed my head, and once again kissed me deeply, sliding his tongue into my mouth.

Eagerly, I kissed him back; the magnitude of our needs was no joke. Not breaking the kiss, Baekhyun grabbed my butt and hoisted me up, and I wrapped my legs around his hips.

“You’re mine,” Baekhyun whispered, as he walked inside my apartment, kicking the door shut. “Where do you want me to take you?” He asked, pressing me against the doors, his lips landing on my cleavage once again.

“I’d let you take me anywhere,” I said honestly, having no shame left. Right now, I could voice all my desires, and I was sure that Baekhyun wouldn’t make fun of me. I had a hunch I could say the kinkiest thing ever, and Baekhyun would only smirk, eager to try to it with me. “I fantasized about you fucking me in your car, but since we made it upstairs, let’s just go to the bedroom.”

“As you wish, Princess,” Baekhyun pecked my lips innocently, as he strolled to my bedroom, already knowing the way. It wasn’t his first time in my bed, but having sex was something new.

Once he approached my bed, he didn’t gently lay me down as any other man would. Baekhyun was different, and he literally threw me on it. I whined, but when Baekhyun climbed on top of me, I burst out giggling. He was adorable – propped on his elbows, positioned between my legs, lingering above me.

“Why are you giggling so much?” Baekhyun softly inquired, almost as if he was worried that somebody could hear us. “Tell me,” he demanded, and I just looked into his large, sparkly eyes, having no clue what I did to deserve that man. God, I loved him so, so much.

“I’m just super excited,” I added, pecking Baekhyun’s lips, hoping he’d understand that I wanted him to lean down and kiss my breath away. “Fuck me, Baekhyun,” I prompted, grinding my hips against Baekhyun’s growing erection.

“You’re so eager,” Baekhyun whispered, as he started to kiss my neck, slowly making his way down to my collarbones and breasts. The moment I felt his lips on my skin, I held my breath and bit my bottom lip; it was the beginning, and I didn’t want to become a moaning mess during the second base.

Skillfully, Baekhyun undid the rest of my shirt’s buttons what allowed him to nibble my skin all the way down to the waistband of my jeans. “Mm…” I purred in pleasure, as I raised myself from the mattress to discard my wrinkled shirt, letting Baekhyun admire my chest displayed in my best bra.

“You’re killing me, Princess,” Baekhyun said in a deep voice when he stopped his ministrations to look into my eyes. Per usual, they had a pinch of playfulness, but right now, it was mixed with thirst.

Impatiently, Baekhyun grabbed the hem of his V-neck T-shirt and pulled it over his head, tossing it over his shoulder. Finally, he started undressing, and I could admire his beautiful body. Baekhyun was skinny; he didn’t have the most defined abs, but I didn’t care. For me, he was the most handsome man I’d ever laid my eyes on.

“Come on, Baekhyun, I can’t wait any longer,” I rushed him, reaching for his belt to unbuckle it. “Strip for fuck’s sake,” I cursed, and Baekhyun smirked when I began undoing my jeans, earnestly yanking them down my thighs. I was impatient, and he loved my urgency.

“God, I love you so much,” Baekhyun confessed, as he mirrored my actions, and quickly returned to his previous position, but this time – completely naked. “Show me how much you love me,” he encouraged, and I, like under a spell, began to arch under him, rubbing my sex against his erection.

“Baekhyun,” I hissed when his forefinger touched my womanhood, gently pressing it against my clit. His touch was very delicate, and I was incredibly responsive – one flick of his finger, and I’d writhe. “Please, I’m so ready to feel you,” I said shamelessly, but Baekhyun only smirked as he continued to tease me with his digits.

“You’re beautiful,” Baekhyun said, and I, despite my low self-esteem, believed him. His voice was so powerful, and it took complete control over my body and my mind, and now, when under him, I felt like a queen.

With his mouth on my neck, sucking another hickey, Baekhyun thrust two fingers into my pussy, making me gasp for air. “Yes,” I whispered into his ear, trying to control my volume. “Fuck me with your fingers, please!”

“If you think that your dirty talk works on me, then you’re absolutely right,” Baekhyun said, as he started to rub my clit with his thumb. “I have to get you ready for my cock,” he added mischievously, curling his fingers inside of me.

“What about you, though?” I asked innocently, batting my eyelashes at him. I barely touched him, and his cock looked as if it needed my attention. I wanted to stroke it, to suck its tip, to make Baekhyun beg me to stop. I wanted to give him as much pleasure as he was giving me. “Let me take care of you,” I demanded, reaching to his length, only to have my hand smacked away.

“After I eat you out, Princess,” he spoke, his eyes fixated between my legs; my sex and his fingers were glistening with my arousal. Having sent me a silly smirk, he dove between my thighs, gently kissing my sensitive bud, almost sending me to overdrive.

“Fuck!” I screamed, kicking my head backward. His large hands were holding my thighs in their place, as his tongue rubbed against my sex. Baekhyun was giving me the best head of my life, and I was so greedy of his ministrations, I rocked my hips against his mouth with desperation. If he kept pleasuring me like that, I’d get off on his tongue, and I was sure he wanted me to come around him.

“Please,” I begged, holding my breath. My body was all hot, as the orgasm was approaching. His grip on my thighs tightened, and he still moved his tongue inside of me at a languid pace. “Baekhyun, please, stop, I’m coming,” I cried out, not caring whether he wanted me to come around his cock or his tongue.

“Don’t hold in your moans,” Baekhyun said, as he looked at up me, smiling cheekily. “Don’t be shy,” he added before he dove between my legs again, pushing his two fingers inside of me, sucking on my clit. Shamelessly, I moaned at the top of my voice, as Baekhyun touched me in the all right places. My body was all tensed, the orgasm was within my reach, and I was ready for it to surge through me. Biting on my bottom lip, muffling my moans, I grabbed the sheets when the wave of fire erupted within me, as I squeezed around Baekhyun’s fingers in absolute bliss.

“Baekhyun,” I murmured his name as I slowly came back to my senses after the mind-blowing orgasm. The sensation was so intense that my mind went blank – his name was the only word on the tip of my tongue which I could voice at the moment.

“Yes, princess” Baekhyun asked in a lighthearted tone, as he lay beside me, placing gentle kisses on my neck, waiting for me to regain my energy. His lips were teasing me, touching me like a feather, but I couldn’t care less; I felt too good to be annoyed.

“That was so…” I started, but I couldn’t finish; he fucked my brains out, and it was impossible for me to describe how good he made me feel. With my last three brain cells, I only knew how to moan his name. “Baekhyun, it was so…”

“You’re cute when you’re speechless,” Baekhyun admitted, and I didn’t even try to argue with him; it was obvious I stood no chance on outtalking him, so I only smiled like an idiot. “Tell me when you’re ready for my cock,” he whispered into my ear, as he gently caressed my skin; I was all sticky, but Baekhyun didn’t seem to mind. Carefully, his hand wandered all over my body, making me feel as if he was worshipping every curve of my figure.

For the very first time, I felt genuinely loved.

I used to think that dreams don’t come true, but now, my wish was lying beside me, and I couldn’t be any happier. With Baekhyun by my side, I had everything I wanted, and that feeling was deliberating.

“Mm…” I purred as I snuggled closer to him, hesitantly reaching for his cock.

“Mm… indeed,” Baekhyun chuckled silently, hiding his face in my hair, as he felt my fingers on his rock-hard cock. “That’s right. Show me how much you want me,” he encouraged, and I gripped his erection, giving it a few unsure strokes. “Come on, I know you can do it better,” Baekhyun teased, knowing it would make my grip tighter and strokes faster.

“Like that?” I asked innocently, but Baekhyun just pressed his face against the pillow as if he was embarrassed to moan. It seemed I wasn’t the only one who was sex-deprived and responsive to the gentlest of touches. “Am I doing it alright?” I inquired, although I knew he enjoyed my ministrations.

He wouldn’t be rocking his hips back and forth if he didn’t.

“Aaah…” Baekhyun hissed, as he abruptly lay on his back. “You’ll be the death of me,” he said, but I only smirked, straddling his thighs. “Is it a bit rich of me to ask you not to tease me and just go straight to the point?”

“Let’s say you’re lucky because I love you and I want you to come,” I answered honestly, giving up my chance to tease him. I’d love to tease him until his endurance, but at the same time, I thought of that bone-shattering orgasm he had given me, and I wanted to make him feel the same. Baekhyun said he loved me, so we had plenty of time to tease each other in the future.

Tonight, my priority was to serve him one of the best orgasms of his life.

Gently, I raised my hips and started to rub my sex against his cock, coating it with my arousal. The moment he felt me against him, his erection twitched.

“How do you feel about me riding you?” I asked him, and Baekhyun eagerly screamed yes. Smirking, I leaned forward, kissing him passionately. My tongue massaged his calmly, as my hips humped against his pulsating cock. “Oh, I am so stretched after your fingers that your thick cock would just slide right in,” I said, and Baekhyun placed his hands on my hips, trying to stop me, as I probably reached his patience limit.

“Why are you teasing me? You said you wouldn’t. You don’t love me anymore,” Baekhyun said, and I rolled my eyes, trying to ignore that snarky remark. I loved him so much; whenever I looked at him, I smiled, and my mouth started to hurt. I doubted my feelings for him could ever decline.

“Shut up, Baekhyun,” I spoke, as I reached for packaging of condoms which was waiting in my bedside table for an occasion like this. “Has anyone ever told you that you talk too much?” I asked, as I carefully rolled the latex down his length.

“Right back at you, princess,” Baekhyun replied cockily, and I shook my head at him; how could he come up with his witty remarks in every situation? Even when I was about to jump on his cock and ride him, he had something to say to shut me up. “Oh, yes,” Baekhyun loudly moaned when I lowered myself on his shaft, “that’s right, you feel so good around my cock.”

“Oh shit, you fill me up so well,” I hissed when my walls squeezed around his cock. Slowly, I rocked my hips back and forth, adjusting to his size. Baekhyun rested on his back with his hands on my hips, helping me find the perfect rhythm.

“You’re so tight,” Baekhyun whined, and I giggled as I fucked him.

“Shit,” I cursed as I cocked my head backward when Baekhyun’s cock hit that right spot. Instantly, I swept Baekhyun’s hands off me and increased my tempo. “Fuck, fuck, fuck,” I moaned quietly, as I felt my orgasm was approaching.

“Don’t stop!” Baekhyun screamed, being probably louder than me. It wasn’t the wrong thing, though. His cock was stimulating my g-spot, and his moans were helping to get me off. His breath was quickened, his thrusts from beneath me were quick, and I just couldn’t hold my orgasm any longer.

I needed my release as much as Baekhyun needed his.

“I’m coming,” I panted, and Baekhyun groaned when he felt my walls squeeze around his throbbing erection. “I’m coming, Baek,” I screamed as I felt my body tense when my orgasm ripped me apart.

“Shit, princess, I –” Baekhyun moaned when he pushed his hips against me, releasing into the condom. “Fuck, it feels so nice,” he said when I collapsed on top of him, resting my head under his chin. His hands found purchase on my sides, as he pecked my temple.

“Yeah, it was worth waiting,” I said when I ghosted my fingertips across his chest. “But I still wished we hadn’t had to wait,” I added, and Baekhyun chuckled.

“I hope it rocked your life just as it rocked mine,” Baekhyun whispered, and I just grinned as I realized how perfect it was; we both made each other so happy, and it made me feel delirious. I wished we could stay on that cloud nine forever.

“What time do you have to get to work?” Baekhyun asked, pulling me out of my reverie. Right, tonight was Sunday, and tomorrow I had to show up at work. I guess it wasn’t that great idea to go on a date today; we had too little time to enjoy each other’s company to the fullest.

“I start at 7,” I said as I squinted to read the time from the clock. It was almost 1 o’clock. I was going to be screwed at work. “What about you?”

“Same,” Baekhyun replied, gently caressing my side. “What are you doing after work?” He asked, and I giggled, not knowing what to say. We had plenty of fun together, and Baekhyun looked forward to seeing me again.

“Actually, it’s pretty busy now,” I started vaguely, trying not to get too much into the details. I couldn’t tell Baekhyun I was planning to take a few days off to think through the drama which Jiwoo had caused. I didn’t want Baekhyun to get in the middle of it; it was better for him to stay out of it.

“So, I guess we’ll see each other on Tuesday,” Baekhyun concluded, and I furrowed my eyebrows, having no clue what he was implying. Had we made plans which I forgot? “I can’t believe that I’m saying it, but it’s actually the first time I’m excited about the wedding prep. Hongbin said we’re gonna choose cake.” He added, and I nodded, though I knew I wasn’t going to attend. Not after what I had seen. I just couldn’t lie to Hongbin about a matter of this magnitude. “Well… I mean I was excited multiple times because I knew I was going to see you, but this time is different because it’s about you and cake. You understand what I mean?”

“Of course, I understand,” I said with a genuine smile. Baekhyun was a sweet tooth, and he wouldn’t let a chance to have a piece of cake slip. Several pieces of many cakes, actually. He was going to be in the seventh heaven, and I felt sad because I knew I couldn’t join him and share my cake with him. He would have to survive with only one portion.

“It’s like two my favorite things in the universe – you and sweets,” Baekhyun whispered against my skin before he pressed his lips against mine in an innocent kiss. It was long and feather-light, but because of the emotions it conveyed – my heart skipped a beat.

If I had any doubts about his alleged feelings, now I was unconditionally sure that he was genuine.

“I wish we could stay forever in bed,” I confessed, hating the idea of waking up and going to work. I wished for this day to last longer because I really had no energy or any motivation to deal with the drama Jiwoo had stirred. I was in my paradise, but as soon as the sun would rise, my fantasy was to end. I couldn’t let them carry on, pretending that none of it had happened.

It was time for Jiwoo to take responsibility for her actions.

***

Saying ‘goodbye’ to Baekhyun in the morning was difficult, but since the two of us had work, he didn’t complain as much as he would usually do. In a rush, I put on some formal clothing and left my apartment, not wanting to be late. My boss wasn’t particularly friendly, and I didn’t want to get on her wrong side, especially when I was planning to take a few days off.

I had a plan in my head which I wanted to follow.

The first step was texting Jiwoo. I had to tell her that I knew about her mistake, and since talking to her face to face wasn’t an option, I opted for another solution. I’d just text her to inform her about what I had seen, resign from being her maid of honor, and ask her to confess her wrong-doings to Hongbin.

During my lunch break, I did what I was planning to do. It wasn’t the simplest thing I had ever done but it was a secret which I couldn’t keep. Twenty minutes later, I checked my phone to see if Jiwoo replied. Instead of texting me back, she left me on read, and I guessed that in this outcome it was good enough.

The second step was asking my boss for a few days off. Unwillingly, she agreed. It was the first time I had ever asked her that, so out of generosity, she complied with my request.

The third step was finding a quiet place to think everything over. At first, I wanted to take the money which I had been saving for Jiwoo’s wedding present, and go on a spontaneous trip somewhere where no one would find me, but given the amount I had managed to save up, it was impossible.

After a long inner debate, I settled on going to the spa. I had always associated this place with relaxation and composure, so it seemed ideal.

As soon as I had some free time, I made a phone call and booked a few services, packing my schedule for Tuesday with massages, face masks, and whatnot. I was to relax and clear my mind.

For the rest of the day, I made sure to finish all my projects so my boss wouldn’t call me during my free days. Besides, I didn’t like to leave things in pending. I felt much better because I didn’t have any past projects waiting for me, while new projects kept coming at the same time.

Refraining from calling Baekhyun was particularly challenging. He texted me a couple of times, telling me how excited he was about picking the cake, although he was super busy at work. I wanted to hear his voice, or interact with him properly, but I knew what was ahead of me, so I limited our interaction to the bare minimum. It was arduous but it needed to be done.

On Tuesday, I woke up around 10 o’clock. I had stayed late at work, and I had been exhausted when I had come back home. Lazily, I went to the coffee maker and turned it on. I was still tired, and I needed caffeine to help me.

I had to show up at the spa at 1 o’clock, so I still had plenty of time to get ready.

The Cutest Butt | 8:23 | what about a date after the cake tasting?

The Cutest Butt | 8:24 | I know it’s a weekday but I just want to take you to the movies

The Cutest Butt | 8:26 | what do you say???

It was adorable of him that he wanted to take me out, but I had other plans, so I had to turn him down. In the vaguest of ways, since he didn’t know that I wasn’t going to participate in the cake tasting. As soon as I poured coffee into a cup and added milk, I sat in a chair and wondered about my reply.

Me | 10:11 | sorry for not replying sooner

Me | 10:14 | let’s not make any plans

Me | 10:14 | we should go with the flow

Having replied to him, I silenced my phone, not desiring to be bothered. Jiwoo’s secret was gradually eating me from the inside, and I wanted to solve that dilemma as fast as it was possible. The only way I could achieve that was by cutting off contact with the outside. I could figure everything out only if I were left alone with my thoughts.

After I drunk my coffee, I got ready to leave.

Punctually, I arrived at the spa. With a polite smile, I greeted the receptionist, and he instructed me, so I had no trouble finding the right room.

Although I don’t particularly like when other people touch me, it felt nice to be massaged. The masseur was very skilled, and when he took good care of my body, I realized how tense I was.

At first, all I could focus on was pleasure caused by magical hands of the masseur. Only when he relieved me some pressure, and I got used to this feeling, my thoughts drifted to that unpleasant matter – Jiwoo’s infidelity.

From a bystander's point of view, it was simple – Jiwoo let another man drill her. In a healthy relationship, that kind of behavior was unacceptable. Having done it, Jiwoo proved that she’s not worthy of Hongbin’s love thus their hot affair should come to an end.

Unfortunately, I wasn’t a bystander but Jiwoo’s friend. It was my duty to support her no matter what. We had always been tight, and even when she had slept with Jungkook, it hadn’t broken us apart. As her friend, I was supposed to be loyal to her regardless of circumstances.

According to the role of a devoted friend, I should remain silent.

The matter was even more complicated, though. Somehow through the romantic acquaintance, Hongbin had become my friend as well, and it was only understandable that he deserved my loyalty, too. Maybe we weren’t as tight as Jiwoo and I, but he didn’t deserve being lied to. I just couldn’t let him spend the rest of his life with someone who had cheated on him so carelessly.

At this point, I wished I hadn’t caught her with that lap dancer. Everything would have been less problematic, and I wouldn’t have had conscience eating me from the inside. Jiwoo wasn’t perfect, but despite her flaws, she deserved happiness. The same was with Hongbin, though every plan of solving this situation seemed to deprive one of them of it.

Regardless of what I was or wasn't going to do, one of them was going to feel miserable; it wasn’t possible to take a cookie and eat a cookie – I needed to decide which one I was going to hurt in other to save the other, even though it might sting them both at the very beginning.

“Is there anything bothering you?” The masseur asked, sensing that I wasn’t getting any less tense. He was working on relieving my stress, but I wasn’t cooperating as terrible thoughts were running through my mind. “Just relax,” he instructed, and I rolled my eyes, biting my tongue before I said ‘easier said than done’ to him.

In between the treatments, I was intrigued to check my phone for any new calls or messages. It was tempting, but I expected the Pandora’s Box to have been opened, so I decided to enjoy the delightful ignorance. They had already met at the confectionery; therefore I suspected them to be confused as hell upon my absence or substitute.

Thankfully, I resisted the temptation.

Throughout the day I changed my mind about the matter almost every ten minutes. The situation referred to my friends, and making the final decision was hard as hell. Slowly my time was running out, and I didn’t come up with a solution.

I couldn’t ask anyone to guide me through it. The only person who came to my mind was Baekhyun, but I knew that his solution would be biased; he obviously favored Hongbin, whereas I learned how to like the lovebirds equally regardless of our history.

No matter how much I was thinking about that dilemma, I couldn’t find a solution which would satisfy both sides of the conflict. It was a vicious circle. Having pondered for over five hours, I didn’t come with any conclusion.

The only option was to judge Jiwoo’s actions with accordance to my morals. I had no idea what had made her fuck Wonho back then, but I knew that Hongbin deserved honesty.

I had to trust the facts.

I’ve always believed that the ugliest truth is better than the most beautiful lie, and if Jiwoo and Hongbin are really meant to be together, they will work it out somehow.

Hongbin has the right to know what Jiwoo had done at her bachelorette party.

My decision was final.

***

Around 8 o’clock, I returned home. Having made my decision, I felt mean, but my feelings only multiplied when I saw Baekhyun outside my doors. He was sitting on the floor with his back pressed against the doors, his knees bent, and his head low. Without any doubt, he was sad.

As soon as he noticed me, he jumped up to his feet, and stormed toward me.

“What the hell was that? I’ve been texting you the whole day! Why were you ignoring me? Is that true?” Baekhyun shouted, fuming because of my behavior.

What was true? Had Jiwoo confessed to her faults? Wow, I did not expect that.

“I’m sorry, I just have to think it through,” I answered, and Baekhyun’s expression swiftly transitioned from sad to furious. It was strange; did he really feel so mad when he found out about Jiwoo’s infidelity? No, it didn’t make any sense. “Wait, what do you mean?” I asked as I pulled out my phone out of my purse, curious what Baekhyun had texted me earlier.

The Cutest Butt | 15:47 | I’m stuck in traffic

The Cutest Butt | 15:48 | I’ll be late

The Cutest Butt | 15:48 | wait up for me, please

The Cutest Butt | 16:12 | wtf???

The Cutest Butt | 16:13 | who’s that chick, and why is she saying that she’s the maid of honor???

The Cutest Butt | 16:15 | what the hell happened???

The Cutest Butt | 16:16 | answer me as soon as you read it

The Cutest Butt | 18:38 | I talked to Hongbin

The Cutest Butt | 18:39 | is that true???

The Cutest Butt | 18:40 | how could you do it to me

I felt sick when I read these text messages. I had no idea what Baekhyun meant by any of it, but he seemed hurt by whatever Hongbin had told him. I had refused to participate in Jiwoo’s wedding, so she must’ve had come up with a story why I was dismissed from my position. However, now, with Baekhyun looking so devastated, I wondered what kind of bullshit she had told him.

“So everything we have gone through is a lie?” Baekhyun asked quietly, and I bit my bottom lip, as I stared into his eyes which were on the verge of watering. Whatever Hongbin had told him about me, it wasn’t right, and I had to explain this misunderstanding. I couldn’t lose Baekhyun over something I hadn’t done. It was Jiwoo’s fault, and I couldn’t let her mistakes ruin my life.

I shook my head, clueless about what I should say. It’s not what it looks like. Let me explain. You only need to hear me out. All of these lines which were suitable for my answer and cliché, and I knew Baekhyun wouldn’t listen to what I had to say if I used them. So instead, I decided to be blunt.

“Jiwoo had sex with a lap dancer during her bachelorette party I threw for her, and I caught her, and I texted her that I couldn’t be her maid of honor, and today I spent the entire day thinking if I should tell Hongbin about it. And I have no idea what she had told him, but it’s not true. I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you in any way, and I hope you believe me.” I confessed on one breath, confusing Baekhyun since he didn’t expect to hear such breaking news.

“What?” Baekhyun asked in utter disorientation. “Are you serious?”

“As a heart attack,” I answered, faintly sending him a single smile. “Do you want to go inside? I don’t want to continue this conversation here,” I said as I looked around the corridor. Any time one of my neighbors could disturb us, and I didn’t want to get interrupted when discussing a matter of this magnitude; especially when Jiwoo probably painted me as a villain in her version of the story.

“Of course,” Baekhyun agreed, and we quickly got inside my apartment.

The first thing I did was to drop my bag and go to the kitchen to pour me and Baekhyun a glass of wine. I didn’t want to get drunk, but I had a feeling this conversation was going to make me mad, and a single glass of wine could help me remain calm. I had never liked chamomile tea anyway.

“OK, so tell me what I allegedly did,” I started as I handed Baekhyun his wine, and sat at the other side of the kitchen island. “Is it bad?”

Sighing, Baekhyun chugged the wine I had given him. “Hongbin told me what he heard from Jiwoo. According to her, she needed to replace you because you’ve always had romantic feelings for Hongbin, and she noticed them escalate recently. Jiwoo said that you only agreed to be her maid of honor hence you could be around Hongbin and eventually steal him away.” Baekhyun explained, and my jaw dropped. This was ridiculous; ever since I had met them, I had always been attracted to Baekhyun. “Is that true? Did you use me, so I could be your cover?”

I should feel offended by his accusations, and mad at Jiwoo for sowing a seed of doubt in his head. However, I also understood Baekhyun; we just started officially dating, so he’s probably extra cautious about our relationship. In that state of mind, it’s not difficult to manipulate people’s feelings.

“Do you believe in what I said?” I asked straightforwardly, a bit afraid to hear his answer. No matter how ridiculous my infatuation in Hongbin sounded, Baekhyun had no reason to discredit that option. Right now, it was my word against Jiwoo’s, and Baekhyun was torn apart.

“I don’t know,” Baekhyun said honestly. Unlike me, he didn’t have an entire day to think everything through; he was caught in the middle of that shitstorm. Moreover, he was expected to pick a side almost as soon as he heard both sides of the conflict.

“How could I be attracted to Hongbin when I was having heart-eyes at you ever since I met you?” I asked rhetorically, as I chuckled drily. I was interested in Baekhyun ever since Hongbin had introduced him to me. Jiwoo’s story about my infatuation didn’t make any sense.

“I must admit that your version makes more sense to me.” Baekhyun started, and I couldn’t stop a smile which stretched across my face. He believed in me, and even if he had doubts, he didn’t jump into any conclusion. He wanted to hear me out, and make up his mind cautiously. “I mean, it’s not the first time Jiwoo cheated, right? You told me she slept with your boyfriend.”

I didn’t want to return to that chapter of my life, but Baekhyun was right. Old habits die hard, so I had to assume that Jiwoo hadn’t changed that much after all.

“I took a few days off to think about it, and I decided to tell Hongbin the truth.” I started, as I poured us more wine. “But now, when Jiwoo lied about me, he might not believe me. It’s my word against hers, and I’m sure he’s going to trust his fiancée and not a girl who supposedly can do anything to break them apart, so she can have him all for herself.”

Because of what Jiwoo had said him, Hongbin probably wouldn’t understand my pure intentions. Right now, if I snitched on Jiwoo, he’d think I only wanted to ruin her flawless image so I could steal him away. In his head, I must’ve been a snake waiting for a perfect moment to bite. Because of lies which Jiwoo had fed him with, I was sure he wouldn’t believe me.

“What should I do?” I asked Baekhyun, feeling helpless, hoping that he knew how to save the situation. When Jiwoo had given me a role in this conflict, Baekhyun was the only person who wasn’t directly caught up in it. Maybe he could advise me. “At first, I wanted to tell Hongbin everything because I felt he deserved to know the truth. Right now, I’m outrageously mad at Jiwoo. Is it evil of me that I want her to suffer?”

“Come here,” Baekhyun simply said, as he waited for me with open arms. “As I said, I’m surprised you managed to stay friends with her after she slept with your boyfriend.” He whispered as he hugged me tightly, kissing my temple. “If you want, I can call Hongbin and arrange a meeting, so you could explain everything to him properly. He deserves to know the second side of this story.”

“Do you really think he’d believe me?” I inquired, staring into his eyes, but Baekhyun only smiled at me and pecked my lips, and I instantly knew it couldn’t be that bad with him by my side. Even the situation seemed terrible, Baekhyun’s support made me feel better. He was a single ray of sunshine in the darkest day, and I couldn’t believe in my luck of finding that man.

“It’s their life, not yours.” Baekhyun quietly started while caressing my back to show me his comfort. “You wanted to help him, and even if he doesn’t listen to you, it shouldn’t matter. If he really wants to be with her despite your accusations, you should let him make that mistake.”

“Okay, I’ll do that,” I murmured as I snuggled closer to Baekhyun.

“And don’t let Jiwoo or Hongbin dominate your life. If their problem, not yours. After the confrontation, just focus on your happiness. You can’t spend your life pleasing other people. Well… you can, but the only person you can please is me – obviously.”

“You can’t be serious even in one conversation, can you?”

“I can, but you looked like you needed a mood boost,” Baekhyun admitted, and I chucked loudly, already feeling better. “Besides you started it.” He added, and I furrowed my eyes in confusion, having no clue what he was referring to. “Did you seriously set ‘The Cutest Butt’ as my name in your contact list?” Baekhyun teased, and I playfully hit his arm in embarrassment. “Not gonna lie, I love it.”

***

The very next day, Baekhyun arranged the meeting with Hongbin. Officially, they were supposed to meet up for a gaming night at Baekhyun’s apartment – in order to Hongbin not suspect a thing, Baekhyun proposed something they did almost every week.

“Why am I stressed?” I asked Baekhyun, as I paced around his apartment, feeling much more nervous than I had ever been. My hands were shaking, and my stomach was hurting. I hated that feeling.

“Relax, you know Hongbin. He’s not the type to get too emotional.” Baekhyun tried to calm me down, but it wasn’t as effective as any of us hoped for. “He’ll listen to you, I know that much.”

“You better be right,” I said, though I wasn’t convinced. “I better check the pizza, I don’t want to burn it,” I added, excusing myself so I could check up on the pizza I was making. The moment I opened the oven, I heard knocking.

Hongbin had always been punctual.

Quickly, I got the pizza out of the oven, wiped my hands in my trousers, and went to the living room to greet Hongbin. Unfortunately, he wasn’t alone. Jiwoo must’ve suspected something, so she tagged along as if she was afraid there could be a trap.

“What the hell is she doing here?” Jiwoo angrily asked as soon as she noticed me leave the kitchen. In a very protective manner, she took a step forward, standing in front of Hongbin almost as if she was afraid I’d throw myself at him. “How can you still hang out with that wench? She used you to get closer to Hongbin. Can’t you see how obvious that is?” Jiwoo said in a worried voice, and I had to try my best not to burst to laugh.

“Jiwoo, relax,” Hongbin murmured, trying to calm her down. “She may have indecent intentions, but she didn’t do anything,” Hongbin added, but Jiwoo didn’t stop pretending to be very concerned. “Besides, I’d never cheat on you. I have always been loyal to you, and I’m going to remain loyal to you until the day I die.” Hongbin confessed, and kissed her cheek before he walked around her to properly greet Baekhyun.

“I’m sorry that I can’t say the same thing about your fiancée,” I interjected before Jiwoo would dominate the conversation, diss me, and force Hongbin to leave. It wasn’t the purpose of today’s meeting. It was about the hurtful truth.

“What do you mean?” Hongbin asked as he looked at me, and then at Jiwoo who was still in the middle of her impeccable performance. I couldn’t believe that she could stand there, stare into his eyes, and not falter. “Jiwoo; what is she saying?”

“I’m saying that she fucked one of the strippers during her bachelorette party,” I spoke, not even bothering to sugar-coat the truth. “I caught her in the bathrooms. I really wanted you to be happy together, but I just can’t let her lie to you.” I added, and Baekhyun walked up to me to hold my hand, as he sensed that I needed his support.

“What is going on?” Hongbin asked as he was still in shock after I revealed Jiwoo’s secret. “Is that true?” Hongbin turned to Jiwoo, and she quickly refused by shaking her head.

“Of course not, I told you about her,” Jiwoo spoke, and unless Baekhyun held me by his side, I might’ve run up to her to scratch her face off. I couldn’t fathom how she could lie to him so effortlessly. I had a feeling it was difficult to face the consequences, but since she possessed the courage to jump a random guy’s dick, she also should have some strength left to admit to her errors.

“Can’t you see that she’s trying to destroy our relationship? Before our engagement, she told me that she got rid of the feelings she had for you, but I stayed cautious. At first, I believed her that she started to like Baekhyun, but even then, I didn’t fully trust her. I knew that at some point she’d try to double-cross me, and it happens now.” Jiwoo spat, and I listened to her bullshit, fuming, purple with rage. “I’ve never told you about it, but back in college, I caught her having sex with my boyfriend.”

What. The. Actual. Fuck.

Excuse her? How could she say that? How could she manipulate the facts so easily?

“Oh, no, you did not say that!” I shouted as I tried to wriggle out of Baekhyun’s grip. “Let me go, I can’t stand here like that when she’s trying to pin her faults on me!” I yelled, yanking my arm free. “She’s lying! She fucked the stripper last week, and she fucked my boyfriend then!” I stated with a raised voice, hoping that Hongbin could detect bare honesty in my tone.

“Why are you doing this? Why can’t you let me be happy? Hongbin will never be yours, when will you get that shit in your head?” Jiwoo stated, making me more enraged with every toxic word that left her vile mouth. “He doesn’t love you and he never will!”

“Is that true?” Baekhyun asked, and my heart broke when I heard his voice. No, it wasn’t possible. It wasn’t happening. Her venom couldn’t get to Baekhyun. No, he trusted me. Baekhyun knew better not to believe in anything that she said. Yes, she was convincing, but it was just lies.

Obviously mad, Baekhyun stared at me, and I looked away. His beautiful eyes lost its usual hint of playfulness, being replaced with disappointment and sadness. The revelation broke him.

That was enough. I had let Jiwoo bully me way too long. I could live with that, but Baekhyun was off limits. She messed with his feelings, and I wasn’t going to let it slide. It was fine as long as she was messing with me, but Baekhyun was someone I cared too much, and I wasn’t going to tolerate that kind of behavior. Jiwoo knew that he was my weakness which I didn’t want to involve in this mess.

“Not only you know how to manipulate facts, but you can manipulate people, too. Wow, I’m impressed. I guess you didn’t completely waste time when you were majoring in psychology.” I started, dangerously calm. I was driven by rage, and my voice didn’t even break once.

“Hongbin, I tried to do you a favor, but instead of helping you, I just lost my closest friends.” I started, as I looked him in his eyes. Now, I only wanted to voice my thoughts, and I couldn’t care any less about being blunt. They had it coming. “If you want to marry that filthy lying bitch, I can’t forbid you that. I can only hope you’ll realize what kind of monster you chose to be your wife. If you’re really that stupid to fall for her lies, you fucking deserve each other.”

“Jiwoo, I’m really offended that you value our friendship so little that you pinned your faults on me. You don’t deserve him, and I hope this thought will haunt you forever. Even if they don’t believe me, you know what you did.”

“Baekhyun, I have always been genuine with you, but if you believe her, then I think we should stop seeing each other. You said that Jiwoo’s lies don’t affect my life, but they just did, so it was nice being with you even if it only lasted for two days.”

“Now, that everything’s been said, I wish you hell,” I added, and with that, I stormed out of Baekhyun’s apartment. Whatever they decided to do, it wasn’t my problem anymore.

***

As soon as I left Baekhyun’s apartment, I took a few series of deep breaths. The conversation, or rather the monolog was stressful and tiring, and I felt a huge relief when I escaped that toxic place full of destructive people.

I didn’t expect Baekhyun to run after me, and he, in fact, didn’t, but I still felt a bit of disappointed. I had always been there when he needed my aid, but now, when I needed support, he was brainwashed with plenty of Jiwoo’s lies.

Regardless of how difficult for me it was going to be, I made up my mind to forget about him. I hadn’t wanted him to stand up for me – his support would be enough. Having that, I could do anything. I knew that without him, at first, it would sting a little, but further in the future, I was going to be just fine.

I am my own person, and I was planning to live my own life.

For the rest of the week, I used the same routine. In the afternoons, I was trying new Tasty recipes, and in the evening, I was meeting my friends over a couple of drinks. On Friday, it got a bit tedious, but I needed to contact my other friends who weren’t venomous snakes.

During that healing time, I had a lot of fun, and I didn’t cry once. I couldn’t blame myself for their wrong judgment, and I wasn’t going to cry because of them. Instead, I chose to put my new found energy to good use. I caught up with my friends, and I relaxed before work.

On Saturday, I met with my high school friends. It was enjoyable, but they were as solemn as they had been in high school, so we finished our meeting around 11 o’clock. It was a bit disappointing because I didn’t want to leave yet, but no matter what I had tried, I couldn’t have convinced them to stay.

I didn’t hurry to come back to my place, but when I reached it, I wished I had stayed for another round. Baekhyun wasn’t the last person I wanted to see, but it wasn’t the meeting I yearned to have, either. Did he not get the message? I was done with him.

“Just go home, Baekhyun,” I said trying to ignore him. For the past week, I managed to focus on other things, and I knew it was going to be difficult if he’d randomly show up at my doors. “I don’t want to see you,” I added, as I turned my back to him, trying to find keys to my apartment.

“Let’s talk,” Baekhyun offered, but I just snorted.

“There’s nothing to talk about. Everything has been already said,” I bitterly answered.

“I’m sorry it took me so long, but I want you to know that I chose you,” Baekhyun started to speak, although I told him not to do that. He was annoying. Couldn’t he get a hint that I didn’t want to interact with him? I literally told him to leave me alone.

“I didn’t want you to choose,” I talked back, not even considering that my worlds might hurt him. “Everything is over, Baekhyun. Just move on. You’re Hongbin’s best friend, you can’t leave him. You still can be the fantastic threesome with him and Jiwoo.” I quickly opened the doors of my apartment and slipped in, but Baekhyun grabbed the edge of the doors and yanked them open before I managed to close them behind me.

“Just shut up and listen,” Baekhyun ordered, as he walked inside of my apartment without my permission. “I know I messed up. I should’ve done something.”

“But you didn’t, so you missed your chance,” I spat, crossing my arms across my chest. “Goodbye, Baekhyun. It was lovely seeing you.”

“I gave up being the best man,” Baekhyun announced, but that didn’t shock me. He wasn’t the smartest man alive, but at least he had enough intellect to get out of that dramatic circle. “I wondered what I had said to you, and I decided to listen to my own advice. I’m going to put my happiness above anything else, and the only person who can make me really happy is you.”

“Yeah, right,” I snorted stubbornly, as I turned around to face him. Baekhyun was just as handsome as I remembered, and he was looking at me the way that used to make my legs weak.

“I've always believed you,” Baekhyun confessed, and before I managed to retort, he pressed his forefinger against my lips, shushing me. “I don’t care about what Hongbin thinks about you or this situation; I just know that I want to be with you. I don’t need anyone’s approval to be with you. I want to take you on dates, I want to kiss you. I even want to watch these stupid TV shows with you. I just can’t let you leave me. Not when I know that you still love me.”

“No,” I wanted to disagree, but Baekhyun once again shushed me.

“Shut up,” he sternly warned me, but as soon I firmly closed my mouth, Baekhyun started to chuckle. “Kiss me, princess,” he ordered, and I must’ve lost my mind because I pressed my lips against his in no time. Baekhyun knew which buttons to push to get me back.

“From now on, it’s only you and me, okay?” I asked as I pulled away. Smiling at me, Baekhyun stared into my eyes, his playfulness back, and nodded his head.

“It does sound like a dream to me,” Baekhyun replied and pulled me into his tight embrace.

#baekhyun smut #baekhyun angst #baekhyun fluff #byun baekhyun #EXO baekhyun #baekhyun fanfiction #baekhyun scenario #baekhyun fanfic #exo #baekhyun #wedding fever #wedding au #friends to lovers au

[winetae]

⇾ cross the line (m).

idol!au + impreg kink 

⇁ female reader x seokjin

⇁ smut, idol!au

⇁ unprotected sex, kink discovery, dirty talk ↳  (supposed to be a drabble); 3.8k

. . .

seokjin knows he shouldn’t, but he can’t stop himself from coming back to you. 

(a/n) ik this is idol!au but seokjin is a bit ooc !! i don’t think he’s really like this irl ok,, also tagging addie bc she said she’s a thirsty hoe n wants to read @chinnychimchim (ilu) inspired by pic above (ldflfjkj) + title taken from ariana grande’s song into you which was the original title for this fic (ha) love u all & happy holidays. 

Seokjin liked to think he had excellent control over his own emotions. 

How could he not when this particular skill was one of his many job requirements? He had learned long ago to conceal his frustration with forced smiles and loud laughs, to veil any traces of fatigue behind an immaculate appearance. It was the only way to maintain his manufactured idol image.

But Seokjin was only human. There were times when his carefully crafted mask shattered around the edges, his real feelings bleeding through the tiny cracks. Between Bangtan’s packed schedules and the stress from the impending comeback, his patience often hung by a thread. The younger members in particular liked to push their luck and test his tolerance, their jokes teetering between friendly banter and blatant disrespect. Only years of practice had helped him curb his instinctive desire to put them back in their place. 

Thankfully the constant presence of cameras kept him in check. Only the occasional tick in his jaw betrayed his vexation. On the days when he felt particularly vindictive, he slapped a friendly hand over Jungkook’s shoulder with more force than necessary. Just as a reminder. 

But those slips in composure rarely happened, all things considered. Seokjin was good at bottling up his feelings, a charming smile always ready to deflect any intrusive questions asked by reporters. The exaggerated winks and excessive air kisses were now an automatic response to the shouts of his name, and all the boasting no longer made his ears turn pink from embarrassment. Every day, he played his role as the narcissistic visual convincingly, the shameless bragging more for comedic effect than anything else (the extra five seconds of screen time were a welcome bonus). 

Managing his image wasn’t an easy feat by any means. The list of things he wasn’t allowed to do or say was twice as long as the one detailing what he was given permission to do. Even when the cameras stopped rolling, he had to be mindful of his every expression and action. 

Naturally, there were times when he wanted to say ‘fuck this’ and throw caution to the wind. He was sure most of his friends shared the same sentiment. They all coped with it in different ways; Yoongi vented his anger through his lyrics, making a home for himself in his studio, and Hoseok smuggled late night snacks into his room when their manager wasn’t looking. 

Seokjin’s preferred method of rebellion was you. 

Or, more specifically, fucking you into the sheets in hotel rooms when your schedules permitted it. 

It was the ultimate transgression, but Seokjin would be lying if he said the adrenaline rush didn’t excite him.

He could handle extreme dieting even if his stomach grumbled in protest. He could turn a blind eye to the vicious comments left under his articles even if he had to subdue his initial burst of anger. There were, however, rules he didn’t like to play by and assumptions he didn’t care to humor. 

Some would argue that it was more effort than it was worth. Every secret rendezvous necessitated weeks of planning, lots of spare money, and, more often than not, involved the signing of two or three non-disclosure agreements. Even to him, the lengths he went for a fuck seemed like too much trouble, especially when the risks were so high. 

But then he remembered how good your tight heat squeezed around him, your manicured nails digging into his shoulders as you wrapped your legs around his waist with unbridled enthusiasm. Whenever he was buried balls deep inside of you, your name caught in the back of his throat, he reminded himself that you were absolutely worth it. 

There was nothing more satisfying than seeing you fucked out underneath him, your lips bitten-red and parted to ask for more. You always looked so far gone, tears prickling the corner of your eyes when you shuddered in ecstasy, and it did wonders for his ego. 

It was the image of you falling apart on his cock—eyes unfocused, voice hoarse, skin dewy with perspiration—that stayed ingrained in his mind long after the sun had risen up. The memory was barely enough to keep his desires at bay during the weeks that separated the nights spent with you, but Seokjin was forced to make do with the hazy and fading recollections of your trysts. He had nothing else to hang on to. There were no phone calls, no Facetime dates, no ‘good morning’ messages or secret couple clothing exchanged. What the both of you shared wasn’t a relationship, not in the traditional sense of the term, and it sure as hell wasn’t a friendship, either. 

As much as he wanted to spend more time with you, these days he hardly had time to squeeze in a 3 hour nap, let alone find the time to jerk one off in the privacy of his shared bathroom. Concert prep always left him drained, his body too exhausted and sore to even think about working himself to completion. Thoughts of you became less and less frequent as his attention was monopolized by work. All of his days blended into one monotonous routine of repetitive and predictable press questions and the same, fixed set list. 

February kicked in with their new song lining up the charts. He had never been more thankful for the opportunity to perform new songs, new choreos—anything that would break the pattern his body had unwillingly gotten used to. 

The only thing he hated about promotion cycles were the inevitable music show performances. Waking up at the crack of dawn for pre-recordings and then having to kill time for the rest of the day was a pain in the ass he would pay to avoid if he could. 

Seokjin was notorious for complaining about the long waiting hours—his crabby behavior a thing of legend among the staff. It was childish, but he was too petty to change his ways. Bad habits die hard, as they said.

Today, however, he was uncharacteristically quiet, his compliance earning raised eyebrows from staff and members alike. If Yoongi was surprised by his lack of grumbling this time around, he probably hadn’t realized that your comeback had coincidentally overlapped with his.

Eyes trained on the screen in front of him, his thoughts wandered back to all of your stolen moments together. He couldn’t help but notice how your smile looked less strained than it used to be, your eyes twinkling under the harsh stage lights. Seokjin wondered if you had moved on and found someone else to satisfy your needs during the months he hadn’t seen your face. Something ugly twisted in his chest; he hated that he was so replaceable. 

As soon as he finished performing one of their newest songs, his expression darkened again, having caught sight of you as you lined up with your group members. Belatedly, he remembered the presence of the cameras and the watching eyes all around him and hurriedly schooled his features. 

Standing on Music Bank’s ending stage; he waved at the audience blindly, guided by the screams of his name, and aimed his trademark winks at the over-enthusiastic crowd who were more than happy to pretend they were directed at them. He indulged them for a little longer, before deeming his quota of fan-service for the day fulfilled, his attention inevitably strayed back to you. 

Thinking back, he wasn’t sure what he was expecting from you. Even when you two had been seeing each other regularly, neither of you were the type to showcase your closeness outside of closed doors. 

Seokjin wasn’t awaiting a long heart-to-heart conversation or a warm catching up session, but surely you could have reciprocated his smile? When you greeted him with a formal bow, Seokjin fought hard to keep the frown off his face. Why did it feel like a subtle dismissal? Were you mad at him for not staying in contact? He didn’t want to admit how much all of this bothered him. Why was he getting so worked up? After all, you weren’t his girlfriend; you didn’t owe him anything. Was he…overreacting? 

A headache was on its way, he could feel it. When it was time to line up and greet the KBS PD, the promoting groups huddled on either side of the corridor while waiting for him to come out of his waiting room. Leaning his weight back against the wall, his eyes kept flickering back to you. It was easy to spot you out of the crowd; your tinkling laugh recognizable, his ear trained. 

The corner of your eyes crinkled, your expensive, shiny earrings dangling whenever you tipped your head back to laugh at one of your member’s joke. Seokjin’s chest constricted, an invisible weight pressing down until it was hard to breathe. He hadn’t realized he had made his staring obvious until another girl elbowed you, jutting her chin in his direction.

Like a deer in headlights, he stood there like an idiot as you finally acknowledged him with a surprised look painting your face. You offered him a polite smile, confusion evident by the way your brow creased. Now that you were in front of him again, so near, he felt the familiar, distracting tug of arousal. There was something else, too, twinging at his heart, but he focused on the heat stirring in the pit of his belly instead. 

He toyed with the phone in his pocket, his eyes never leaving yours, before finally deciding to just go for it, not wanting to wuss out again and regret it. 

[Seokjin] : Hey. Can we talk? 

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He should have predicted that falling into bed with you would be stupidly easy, like a habit he would never grow out of.

“Fuck, I forgot the condoms.” He had never wanted to slam his head against a wall in sheer frustration until now. Sitting back on his haunches, he cast a dejected look over the expanse of your exposed body, his mouth downturned in a pout. 

Should he text his manager hyung to get him some? He was desperate enough to put aside his pride and ask. 

“It’s okay,” you reassured him, grabbing his hand between your dainty fingers before he could reach for his phone. “I’m clean, are you?”

“Y-yeah.” He licked his plump lips, his answer a breathless stutter. Did you—? “Wait, are you sure?”

He had never not used a condom. With you, or anyone else for that matter. Management had advocated the practice of safe sex enough times that he always kept a condom in his wallet just in case. He had been warned about the dangers of unprotected sex so many times that the mere idea of fucking you bare made his chest constrict with worry. What if…?

“Please, I want you so bad,” you whined, tugging his hand impatiently and effectively putting a stop to his inner monologue. 

Seokjin swallowed thickly as you guided him to the apex of your thighs because, fuck. How were you so wet already? He ran a tentative index finger along your slick folds, feeling the extent of your arousal. A sharp intake of breath alerted him of your sensitivity and he couldn’t stop himself from applying a little more pressure just to hear the sound again. 

You usually needed longer to get ready for him, but you were so wet and slippery that Seokjin surmised he could probably push himself into you with relative ease. His head spun as the tempting visual clouded his vision in a haze of lust. 

“Stop making me wait.”

The audible whine in your voice made the surface of his skin tingle with renewed desire, and he was left momentarily speechless. His shaft stiffened against his thigh, not indifferent to the irresistible sight in front of him. There was no way of hiding how much your actions affected him, and you were quick to take advantage of that.

“Want you to fuck me raw,” you continued, eyes lidded, gyrating your hips in circular motions against his still hand. Already foreseeing he would give in to your request, you didn’t bother to conceal the small yet victorious smirk on your face. “It’s all I could think about when we weren’t together, I missed you so much. My fingers can never compare to your dick.”

Your filthy words made his cock jump, the red tip already leaking with drops of pre-cum. What the fuck. Had he really heard you say…? He couldn’t recall you being this needy or demanding before, but the gleam in your eyes confirmed you had indeed crooned out such brazen and forward words. 

“You can’t just say that, shit,” he squeezed the base of his erection, trying to subtly ease off the edge. The only thought running through his mind right now was how much he needed to fuck you. Maybe it was because his orgasm was long overdue…but it wouldn’t take much longer to bust a nut if you kept talking like that. “Okay, okay, hold on a sec.”

He slipped a finger inside of you, a loud squelching sound telling him your body was lubricated enough already. His bottom lip stayed nestled between his teeth as he focused on getting you ready for his cock. Not that you seemed to need it. You felt so wet, your body eagerly accommodating his intruding digits as if it was welcoming him back. 

“I’m gonna go in now, yeah?” 

“Hurry.” He ignored your whiny mewl in favor of slowly sinking into you. Groans of satisfaction mingled as he inched himself into you. Shaking his bangs out of his eyes so that he wouldn’t miss any shift of expression on your face, he greedily took in the sight of your face scrunched up in pleasure. He gave a tentative thrust of his hips to test the waters, and was rewarded with a delicious moan. Pupils blown dark with pleasure, you pulled him down closer so that your lips could melt against his.

It was frighteningly easy how quickly his body warmed up to yours, how his hands seemed to remember all of your sensitive spots, how his hips settled into the rhythm you liked best. Some things just couldn’t be forgotten, it seemed. Swimming, dancing, cooking his mom’s favorite recipe—you somehow fell in the same category. Months had passed between now and you last liaison, but his body reacted so naturally, as if it relied on muscle memory.

His thrusting became less coordinated, the set pace forgotten. Maybe if he was less taken by lust, he would be embarrassed for not lasting very long. In his defense, it had been a very long time since he last had sex, and no normal human being could resist your hot pussy, anyway. 

“I’m close,” he grunted, the urgency he felt hard to disguise. To this, you crossed your legs around his middle a little tighter, silently inviting him to sink in deeper. He slid a hand up one of your smooth thighs, his fingers sinking into the skin in warning, “Fuck, I have to pull out, sweetheart.” 

“Cum in me. C-can you do that? I want you to fuck me full of cum. Please?” You said the last word so sweetly it made your demand all the more alluring. 

“We shouldn’t, what if—”

“Why not? O-oh.” Your eyes widened in realization. It seemed like you had been knee-deep in lust and had forgotten all about the risks of unprotected sex. “Ah, mmh, but I think you be a good daddy.”

What a filthy mouth you had. Seokjin wondered what kind of porn you had watched to learn all of this…

His hips stuttered, the hand around your thigh gripping the skin so hard he was sure his fingerprints would stay permanently inked on your skin. The clamping of your walls around him, vice-tight, made him realize that this wasn’t just said in jest. You really… You were really into this. The realization made his eyes darken with determination, your pleasure the only object of his attention. 

“F-fuck. Is this what happens when I don’t give you my cum? You’re so horny you’re willing to let me knock you up?” He growled into the shell of your ear, his heart hammering in his chest so loudly he thought it would burst. This was undoubtedly uncharted territory, but he wanted—no, needed—to make you lose it on his cock one last time before he reached his end. “You’ve been such a good cockslut for me, maybe I will reward you.”

“Seokjin!” 

He groaned in turn, your tight pussy trying to milk him as the aftershocks of your climax made you tremble like a leaf in his arms. He distantly registered the tell-tale signs of his own impending release by the way his balls tightened and his stomach tensed. Hips rocking into yours with abandon, he entertained the thought of giving you what you begged for. Having never experienced it before, he could only imagine how it would feel like to spurt his seed into your warm heat and then make you keep it inside you. The mere thought sent shivers down his back all the way down to his toes. Your pussy felt so snug, your walls clenching and squeezing enticingly around his hard shaft, that he just about lost it right there. 

“Fuck fuck fuck.” His nostrils flared when the familiar white hot pleasure crashed over him, momentarily blinding him. 

Seokjin thankfully had the presence of mind to pull out, ropes of white spilling onto your stomach and staining the wrinkled sheets below. He panted heavily, chest heaving as he tried to catch his breath and stabilize his pounding heart.

A huff of laughter escaped his parted lips when he noticed you run your digits across your toned tummy, “Don’t look so disappointed. You know we can’t.” 

You sat up, back now resting against the wooden headboard, a small pout sitting on your lips. “Did you really think I would let you stick it up me without protection?”

“So, you mean…we were safe?”

With a roll of your eyes, you nodded your confirmation, “I get the contraception shot every couple of months… It’s in my contract, anyway. No one wants to deal with a pregnant idol. We have to be a lot more careful about these things… If we have to count on the guy to pull out at the right time, then we should say goodbye to our careers.”

An initial wave of relief put him at ease, his shoulders drooping as an imaginary weight was lifted off of him. Still… There was a niggling feeling in the back of his mind that he couldn’t quite brush aside. He shook his head, instead focusing on cleaning you up and getting ready to head back to the dorm. 

Seokjin watched you tie your tousled hair up with an elastic, his eyes tracing the graceful slope of your nape. Something akin to possessiveness warmed his chest as his sight fell upon the red marks he had suckled down your neck and across your collarbones. 

A thought suddenly occurred to him.

“Did you really miss me?” he asked before he could stop himself. 

In the still of the night, his voice rang out loud and clear. Startled, your fingers hovered in mid-air, three blouse buttons still undone. Even to his own ears, the question reeked with the need for validation and affection. He hated that his feelings were so transparent, so obvious, especially when he didn’t know where he stood with you. 

You turned to face him, cheeks flushed a dusty pink and makeup slightly blotchy. “As much as you missed me.”

He was at a loss for words once more, his mind drawing a blank. What did that even mean? This wasn’t a KBS drama; he could make do without the vague, mysterious answers. Seriously, why were women so difficult to understand? The litany of questions he kept to himself kept him occupied as you both got dressed silently. 

What a waste of a hotel suite, he mused, shutting the door behind him after having watched you leave fifteen minutes prior. There was never time to admire the luxurious backdrop, not when every second spent together could be detrimental to your careers. He had watched enough movies and daytime dramas to know that relationships weren’t supposed to be this way. But since it was you, he was willing to take what he could get.

.

Seokjin found it hard to function the next day. And the day after that. It was becoming increasingly difficult to carry out his job properly when his every thought was plagued by you. His thumb hovered over your name in his contact list the more he let himself be consumed by old memories. He kept spacing out during interviews, and it was only when Namjoon discreetly pinched his side that he was brought back to reality. 

Fans started to notice his strange behavior. They were worried that he was sick and overworked by his company, but the reality was far from that. What would they think if they knew he was actually thinking about filling you up with cum? The thought crossed his mind at the most inconvenient times, more than he was willing to admit. He didn’t blame his fans for thinking he was ill; Seokjin himself felt feverish, his skin hot and clammy. 

For the first time, he felt all semblance of control slip through his fingers. It was as if he had been yanked backwards in time, forced to experience puberty all over again against his will. His body had become a slave to his desires and he was helpless to stop the onslaught of salacious thoughts from eating away at his sanity. 

Even though he knew it wouldn’t help him in any way, he replayed the night in his head whenever he had a spare moment to himself, his tight pants revealing how worked up he got over the memory of you climaxing to the thought of him getting you pregnant.  

At the time, he had thought it to be your kink, but the more he let himself fantasize, the more it dawned on him that the idea equally thrilled him even if it clashed with his moral code. Getting a girl knocked up had always been the one line he had never been willing to cross. Even now, his mind reeled at the thought of him jeopardizing his group’s career because of his carelessness. But knowing that you were actually using contraception gave him the safety net he needed and, for once, he let himself entertain this particular fantasy. 

He didn’t know what to think of this new development or what to do with this revelation. All he knew was that he wanted to try it again, just to see if it was a fluke, a onetime thing. 

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#i scaled this back down to an acceptable drabble size bc it was getting Too Long #idk what i'll do with the bits i took out but yeah ;;; #writing this made me want to get back to paper doll;; i miss writing idol!au fics #this is a bit different but hopefully it's not too bad #u can ignore this i just needed to get it out of my system #i promise i'll get back to writing tessellate part 2 now #no more procrastinating #seokjin smut #seokjin scenarios #bts smut #drabble