#When will I finish the artwork and post it? Only Agni knows | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

maidofphantomhive · 4 years

Text

Fear Won't Last (Modern Agni x Reader)

[B]This was a one shot I originally posted on my Wattpad account for another franchise, but I thought it would better suit our lovely khansama. Enjoy~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Social Anxiety Disorder • SAD • Social Phobia •

--------------------------------------------------

Meaning:

A chronic mental health condition in which social interaction causes irrational anxiety.

------------------------------------------------

The first encounter had been a mere accident.

Cersei Lannister's permanent conniving smirk remained frozen on the television screen whilst you lolloped about in the kitchenette, preparing a hot drink and something sweet to sink your teeth into.

The thunderstorm that had been impertinent enough to negate yesterday's promising forecast had finally begun to settle down, now leaving only the comforting pattering of raindrops against the windows in its place. Not that you minded the more miserable side of the weather – it was actually the perfect atmosphere for a relaxing day at home crammed with television and fatty foods.

During the short journey back to the couch, you can't help but steal an innocently curious glance outside the window, or more specifically, into the apartment directly across the street. You hadn't meant to be a nosey Nellie, but it was a lovely apartment – so much nicer than your own. Expensive furniture, immaculate, exquisite artwork...truly an interior worthy of admiration.

A flash of exotic olive skin captured your attention.

And that's when you saw him.

The man with the silver eyes.

He must have only moved in recently for you were fairly certain that apartment previously belonged to a middle-aged fellow morally opposed to showering.

But this man...

As though sensing someone gawking, the man abruptly paused mid push up and angled his head towards the window. He caught your eye and held your unwavering stare.

Now a normal person would have hastily turned away by now after getting caught, but you were unable to move. Fear kept you firmly rooted to the floorboards, unwilling to relinquish its possessive grasp. Those piercing orbs of gleaming silver tore open your chest and invaded your soul; even though being wrapped up in a pair of fluffy pyjamas, you had never felt so naked and exposed.

Then he smiled, and the chains that bound you were broken.

With a frightened squeak, you rushed towards the window and yanked the curtains shut, keeping you safe from the world's prying eyes.

At least for the time being.

********************

The second encounter occurred a few days later.

Wrapped in nothing but a towel and free of burdens, you danced jovially around the lounge, belting out lyrics in time with the Hamilton soundtrack currently blaring in the background – for those twenty minutes, you were Alexander Hamilton.

You prance across the rug, gaining momentum, and leap onto the couch cushions. You dip and sway, bounce and wiggle, all for an imaginary audience.

Or so you thought...

Turns out there sat one highly invested onlooker across the street; sultry lips had curled upwards into an amused smile when first catching sight of you attempting to perform a pirouette, only to lose your balance and flop haphazardly onto the couch with a giggle. His smile morphed into a grin when you finally looked over, (colour) eyes blinking owlishly.

How long had he been watching?!

Nearly choking on your own humiliation, you scramble off the couch and fumble towards the window with the intent of closing the curtains. But once touching the heavy fabric, you find yourself pausing, and instead redirect your undivided attention to the silver-eyed stranger.

Why was he smiling? Rarely anyone even glanced in your direction, let alone smile – and without a single trace of mockery!

The man raised a hand and waved.

You would have reciprocated had you not been more inclined to admire the defined, deliciously toned muscles decorating his shoulder and arm. When he lowered his arm, those muscles moved and rippled under satin looking skin.

You find your gaze automatically drawn to him despite the fear currently worming its way into your heart. There was something hypnotic about this individual. Something that went beyond the perfectly sculpted torso he so proudly left on display for all the neighbours to ogle. He must have been working out again if those flushed cheeks and glistening bare chest were anything to go by. You try not to come off as a pervert by allowing your eyes to freely roam his body, but it was difficult to ignore the tantalising sight of a V-line peaking out over the dipping waistband of black sweatpants.

After a highly thorough visual examination, your eyes finally settle on his face, just in time to catch his eyes finishing their own perusal.

And then you shut the curtains.

******************

The third meeting...

You had been confronted by rhythmic rap upon the front door one evening, which was extremely peculiar – for the past three years residing in the same apartment, not one person had come to visit, which is what your heart desired. To be quite honest, you doubted many people were actually aware of your existence.

The walls appeared to be closing in with each hesitant step taken towards the door, the air decreasing until only shallow sips of breath were attainable.

Silver eyes were the first thing to greet you.

His smile was warm and genuine; he had come to visit in hopes of striking up a conversation, apparently intent on getting to know you better. But your fear would not allow that. He was too close. Far too close. Your personal space was being invaded and you didn't much care for it.

A large male hand slammed against the wooden surface of the door when you went to slam it in his face, only serving to create additional stress for your person, but this exotic stranger failed to take notice of how distraught you were becoming. Instead he introduced himself – Agni was his name – and asked for an invitation inside – though that was an invitation which you hastily declined. More force was applied to the door on your end but it had little to no impact.

My, my, the man was persistent.

Most women would probably find such a trait to be endearing, but for you it was nothing short of an inconvenience.

It was obvious the look of distress upon your face went unnoticed as Agni continued speaking, hoping to obtain as much information from you as possible; what your name was, what you did for a living, if you were currently involved with someone, what your hobbies were, how you spend your evenings, if you'd like to grab a drink sometime?

But all you could do was choke out breathless strings of nonsensical stammers and incomprehensible syllables, feeling beads of perspiration poise delicately upon your hairline. The familiar sting of tears is the cue your bottom lip needed in order to begin quivering.

Crying before a stranger...how humiliating.

Agni seems taken aback by the reaction to his persistence and his hand slips from the door, granting you the opportunity to swiftly throw the door closed, locking it for good measure.

You have just enough time to shout an apology before hearing him disappear down the hallway.

****************

Agni raises his glass to the window with a smile warm enough to melt butter.

Your own glass is raised.

Were anyone to cast an inquisitive glance in your direction, they'd no doubt come to the conclusion that you had fallen victim to insanity. But they would be wrong. For if they looked hard enough, they would eventually see that, despite there being no one else in the apartment, you were in no way alone.

Agni presses an open notebook firmly against the window of his apartment. 'You look beautiful' is scrawled across the pages in letters large enough for you to read from your current position.

Interaction of this sort had been occurring on a daily basis for the past two weeks. You still couldn't understand why the man was so relentless in his pursuit of your affections, but the amount of effort he put into creating some type of relationship with you was incredibly flattering. No one had ever gone through so much trouble solely for you, so when he offered an invitation to dinner, you had to accept.

Of course, it wasn't what anyone would call a typical dinner; you'd much rather be by his side, feeling the soft, hot touch of his hand across a dinner table, losing yourself in the intoxicating scent of men's cologne, rather than being tucked away in your apartment having to fantasize. But you weren't ready to take such a humungous step, and somehow, Agni understood and accepted such a fact.

With your own notebook ready and waiting by your hand, you flip to a fresh page.

You're going to make me blush again.

You hold it up for him to read.

There was that gorgeous smile again.

If that happens, it means I'm doing a good job!

As if on cue, heat clawed its way onto your cheeks, leaving you to momentarily wonder if Agni could see the effect he had on you from where he sat.

You give a shake of your head.

So cocky!

I believe the word you're looking for is confident.

Hmm...no. No, cocky was definitely the right word. I could have been rude and used the word arrogant instead.

His hand shoots upwards and clutches at his chest.

You know where to strike so it hurts!

A soft laugh slips from your lips and you rest your elbows atop the table, taking a few seconds to admire him. There was a new beauty to his face every time you saw him. In the beginning it was mostly physical attributes, such as the unique colour of his eyes, or the perfectly sculpted physique which he allowed you to ogle as much as your heart desired. But lately, you could notice the things not everyone could; there was always a glimmer within his eyes whenever the pair of you conversed, or a smile which always threatened to split his face in half the moment your eyes connected, or the way he'd continuously steal glances into your apartment when he believed you weren't paying close enough attention. They were only little things, but they were what mattered most.

Agni wiggles his notebook against the glass to earn your attention.

You're staring.

You smile softly.

Is that a bad thing?

No. As long as you don't mind being stared at in return?

If you're the one doing the staring, then I don't mind.

He sets his notebook aside and places both hands against the glass, which compels you to do the same. It was crazy. You both were close enough to see one another's entire life, yet it felt as though there was so much more than a narrow street separating you – keeping you from being together.

Guilt had your hands falling from the glass and towards the notebook.

You needed to know.

Why are you doing this?

Even from here, it was easy to spot the confusion contorting such handsome features.

He picks up his own notebook.

Doing what?

Wasting time on a lost cause.

I don't understand.

Agni...surely you can't be happy with this arrangement? I'm not, and I'm the one that's keeping us divided! How can you be so willing to accept this situation?

Agni brings the marker to his lips and reads your words over and over again. You watch him with bated breath, fearing his response.

He begins to write, holding up his answer a minute later.

I know what it's like to be consumed by fear. Every day is a struggle. A battle no one else can see. But fear is never permanent. It goes away. And until that happens, I will be here, waiting to help you take the next step.

Something clicks inside of you after reading those words.

You find yourself writing a response before your brain even has a chance to comprehend it. You press it against the window.

I'm ready to take the next step...♡

#yana toboso #anime #one shot #reader x stories #so cute #reader insert #read more #reader #long reads #readromance #readreadread #reader x agni #anime / manga #madman #manga #fanfic #fangirl #mental ill health #mental illness awareness

7 notes · View notes