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#Pancreatic Cancer Is Diagnosed
signofcancerblog · 2 years
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signalboobs · 4 months
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Denial is a hell of a drug lemme tell ya
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mayerdohn66 · 10 months
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Acute Pancreatitis: Signs, Treatment, Causes, And Issues
My wife and I just bought a model new house and were in the strategy of decorating it and putting within the landscaping. When gallstones cause a severe attack of acute pancreatitis, the remedy plan may include attempts to remove the stone(s). Unintended weight reduction is fairly common in individuals with pancreatic cancer. Veterinarians diagnose hepatic lipidosis based on a cat's history, bodily examination findings, blood tests, and abdominal ultrasonography. The diagnosis is confirmed by analyzing a sample of the liver taken with an ultrasound-guided needle. To diagnose some causes of hepatic lipidosis, a larger biopsy must be taken during surgery. This test is used to seek out out if you might have a condition that impacts your pancreas or salivary glands. The alpha-2 adrenergic receptor is a G-protein coupled receptor (GPCR) current in all kinds of tissues, corresponding to vascular clean muscle, coronary arteries, salivary glands and the gastrointestinal tract. Its particular actions on the gastrointestinal tract embody contraction of sphincters and decreased motility of the graceful muscle inside the gastrointestinal tract [4, 5]. Activation of the alpha-2 receptor causes contraction of the hepato-pancreatic sphincter (sphincter of oddi), resulting in obstruction of pancreatic enzyme move through the pancreatic duct, resulting in acute pancreatitis. Like IL-6, they're usually not utilized in clinical follow and are more expensive than sometimes used tests. Abdominal radiographs have a limited role in acute pancreatitis. In some circumstances, the inflammatory process might harm peripancreatic structures, resulting in a colon cut-off signal, a sentinel loop, or an ileus. The presence of calcifications within or across the pancreas might indicate persistent pancreatitis. Serum amylase and lipase levels are usually elevated in individuals with acute pancreatitis. In research research, amylase or lipase levels a minimal of 3 instances above the reference vary are typically considered diagnostic of acute pancreatitis. Thus, this method appears to carry promise for the therapy of patients with ALD. Although alcoholic beverages comprise energy, analysis means that underneath sure conditions these energy wouldn't have as much worth for the physique as those derived from other nutrients. In addition, many alcoholics suffer from malnutrition, which might result in liver harm and impaired liver perform. Many drinkers take in lower than the really helpful day by day quantity of carbohydrates, proteins, fats, nutritional vitamins (A, C, and B, especially thiamine [B1]), and minerals (such as calcium and iron). Of the three enzymes, GGT is one of the best indicator of excessive alcohol consumption, but GGT is present in lots of organs and is elevated by different medicine as well, so high GGT levels do not necessarily mean the patient is abusing alcohol. In addition, they could also have fever, loss of urge for food, weight loss, fatigue, night time sweats, joint pains and body aches. Celiac disease is a genetic autoimmune disorder that impacts both kids and grownup. If a child has celiac illness, consuming gluten will cause harm to finger-like projections, called villi, in the lining of the kid's small intestines. This, in flip, interferes with the small intestine’s capability to absorb vitamins in food, leading to malnutrition and a wide selection of different issues. The protein in wheat, barley, rye and oats collectively called “gluten” cause the immune system to form antibodies which then assault the villi. These youngsters with Celiac illness might undergo from symptoms corresponding to belly bloating, pain, gas, diarrhea, constipation, weight reduction, anemia, progress issues, and short stature. high liver enzymes cancer Many completely different tumours may occur inside the liver – some simply affecting the liver (primary liver tumours), some which have spread to the liver from elsewhere (secondary liver tumours). Unfortunately many liver tumours carry a poor prognosis, but this is not invariably the case and with some tumours (eg, lymphoma) chemotherapy could also be possible. Tumours confined to one lobe of the liver can also be amenable to surgical resection. Alcohol consumption and smoking cigarettes can improve the danger of pancreatitis. It is strongly really helpful quitting smoking cigarettes and drinking alcohol to stop pancreatitis. Chronic pancreatitis is much less common and results in 86,000 hospital stays per year. In AP, the serum biochemical indexes of the liver often change, and adjustments in liver function will have an effect on the severity and prognosis of AP. Several drugs can elevate GGT levels, such as phenytoin, phenobarbital, carbamazepine, valproic acid, cimetidine, heparin, methotrexate, furosemide, isotretinoin, and acetaminophen. Likewise, oral contraceptives also can raise the enzyme’s serum level. The size of time you'll have the ability to successfully scale back GGT depends on your actions to deliver the degrees down. For example, if you hand over alcohol, you can see your GGT levels decrease considerably after a month.
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rebirthgarments · 28 days
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TW: Chemical w-rfare, Ab-rtion
Urgent Ask to evacuate Nara, a 🍉 disabled woman with MS who also has pancreatic cancer due to chemical w-rfare.
Support by financially contributing to her @FedUp4Palestine vetted funhnd-raizer (that I personally vetted): givebutter.com/NaraMedicalAid
+ resharing/ reposting this post!
I, Sky Cubacub- a Fed up 4 Palestine team member, have been in direct contact with Nara to get to know her and her story more over the past few days. We have become fast friends due to so many overlapping symptoms of our disabilities. Nara’s story caught my eye because I have post-viral ME/CFS which many times is a precursor to MS. I really want my disability community to show up for her to get this campaign funded that is so close to my heart so that she can continue medical treatment.
We have chatted extensively! During our chats, I found out from Nara that she had not previously had health issues until she was exposed in the white phosphorus attack in 2008. The long lasting damage and effects of phosphorus continue to compound and become more and more disabling to this day, even after 16 years.
Here is her story in her own words (edited for clarity):
“Hi I'm Nara,
I'm a cancer and multiple sclerosis patient. I need treatment, examinations, and follow-up on a regular basis, but the hospitals in which I used to follow up were bombed and the other one was turned into military barracks. All I need now is to leave Gaza for treatment, preserve my life, and live with my family in peace.
We're a family of 4, including my 12 and 7 year old children.
I had been diagnosed with a tumor in the pancreas as a result of inhaling phosphorus in a previous war. A couple years after being exposed to phosphorus, I became pregnant, and the fetus was pressing on the tumor, which drew the doctor’s attention to the cancer. My fetus was emergency aborted, and the spleen, 80% of the pancreas, and part of the small intestine were removed. I complained every now and then of a lot of pain as a result of the removal of part of the pancreas. I was having follow up care in the Turkish Friendship Hospital for hematology and tumors. But since the beginning of October, I have not been able to follow up because the hospital has turned into a military barracks.
The remaining part is talking about multiple sclerosis:
In 2018, I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. I had many complications, such as inflammation of the seventh nerve in the eye, the inability to walk with balance, movement with difficulty, and many symptoms. I was then required to take 12 injections every month and many medications and vitamins. I was following up at the Nasser Medical Complex in Khan Yunis, but unfortunately the hospital was out of service due to the war. So for a long time I have not received any injections. MS is truly difficult and it controls my life completely, and the attacks occur in many and varied ways.”
A note about her breathing apparatus:
Because people in displacement have to wait in long queues and pay to use the bathroom, Nara had started to restrict her water intake because of a UTI she never has been able to heal from. This has created a problem with raised levels of potassium, so doctors have placed her on oxygen for fear of the potassium affecting her heart.
Goals
she needs at least $15,000 to evacuate
2 adults at $5,000 each
2 children at $2,500 each
this price is subject to increase due to the cost of registration for evacuation continuing to go up
The other money will go to the cost of treatment and living costs.
Nara chooses to stay anonymous because she has had to mask her disabilities so much that only her family knows about her MS and Cancer, so we have not linked her instagram, but we are in direct contact with her and can verify that she is who she says she is! Because of this, she cannot promote her own fundraiser, so it is our job to collectively do it for her!
[Image Description: a digital illustration by @k8deciccio of Nara, a Pal-eh-stienian woman wearing a black hijab/outfit with purple highlights. She has a breathing apparatus that is bulbous that goes in her nose. Text Reads: Help Narawith Cancer and MS Treatment, She Must Evacuate with her family of 4. $30k goal givebutter.com/NaraMedicalAid . There is a QR code in the bottom right corner that goes to her support link. The @FedUp4Palestine logo is in the top left corner.]
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ceyhanmedya · 1 year
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What is pancreatic cancer? What are the symptoms and treatment methods? 2023
New Post has been published on https://bankakredin.com/what-is-pancreatic-cancer-what-are-the-symptoms-and-treatment-methods-2023/
What is pancreatic cancer? What are the symptoms and treatment methods? 2023
The pancreas is an organ that has very important functions in the body, located at the back of the abdomen and adjacent to the stomach, duodenum and large intestine, which is about 15 cm long. The pancreas ensures the digestion of the consumed foods and keeping the glucose obtained from these foods at the required levels in the blood. Apart from this, the smallest damage to the pancreas, which has many vital functions, can lead to consequences that affect the whole body.
What is pancreatic cancer?
Malignant masses that tend to proliferate in any part of the pancreas are called pancreatic cancer. Although cancers formed in this organ can develop in all parts of the organ, they most commonly spread in the head region. The most common type of pancreatic cancer is adenocarcinoma. Since adenocarcinoma originates from aggressive cells, it can progress rapidly and metastasize to surrounding tissues.
What are the symptoms of pancreatic cancer?
Pancreatic cancer can progress insidiously without any symptoms in its initial stages. However, the most common pancreatic cancer symptoms that started to appear in the later stages are; symptoms such as weight loss, abdominal pain, jaundice, loss of appetite, nausea-vomiting, weakness, fatigue, diarrhea, indigestion, back pain, glass paste-colored stools, pallor, sudden onset diabetes and depression without a family history. Rapid weight loss is seen in patients as a result of malnutrition along with bloating, indigestion and loss of appetite. One of the earliest and most common symptoms is jaundice. Initially, jaundice appears in the eyes, then yellowing of the skin, darkening of the urine color and turning into ‘tea-colored urine’, and finally results in an abnormal lightening of the stool color, defined as ‘glass paste’. The cause of jaundice is the inhibition of the excretion of bilirubin produced by the liver to the duodenum as a result of obstruction of the biliary tract by pancreatic cancer. While the pain is a mild discomfort, which is defined as vague abdominal pain, it takes the form of abdominal pain in the back in the future. It is blunt in nature. It is often associated with symptoms of bloating and indigestion. in the future, it takes the form of abdominal pain that hits the back. It is blunt in nature. It is often associated with symptoms of bloating and indigestion. in the future, it takes the form of abdominal pain that hits the back. It is blunt in nature. It is often associated with symptoms of bloating and indigestion.
What are the causes of pancreatic cancer?
Although the cause of the disease is unknown, it is more common in smokers and obese individuals. In almost 30% of patients, the cause of pancreatic cancer is smoking. Pancreatic cancer associated with adult diabetes is controversial. Having a family history of cancer is also among the causes of pancreatic cancer. The disease is more common in men than women, and the risk of developing this disease increases with age. The average age at catching pancreatic cancer worldwide is 63 for men and 67 for women.
How is pancreatic cancer diagnosed?
Diagnosis can be difficult, especially in the early stages, as the disease presents with insidious symptoms. In patients who apply to the health institution in the early period, it is of great importance that the patient is well examined by the physician and that the necessary diagnostic tests are applied in order to diagnose the disease.
Ultrasonography:  Ultrasonography is the first examination method to be applied in the suspicion of pancreatic cancer. The presence of a hard or cystic mass in the pancreas gives information about the size of the mass, its relationship with other surrounding structures, and its proximity to vascular structures.
Laboratory tests:  Serum bilirubin, alkaline phosphatase, liver transaminases and values ​​such as CEA, CA19-9 and CA-125 were increased. Bilirubin in the urine is positive.
Computed tomography (CT) and magnetic resonance imaging (MR):  CT gives very important information about pancreatic tumors when taken orally and intravenously with contrast medication. It has a diagnostic feature of approximately 95% or more. MR imaging is also important in the differential diagnosis of the tumor. These two examinations can be used together when necessary, ensuring the correct results for the surgery decision to be given to the patient and the correct staging of the tumor.
Individuals diagnosed with the disease as a result of the tests should be evaluated in detail in terms of pancreatic cancer stages, and the treatment process should be started immediately after the stage of the disease is determined.
How is pancreatic cancer treated?
At the beginning of the process for pancreatic cancer treatment, at the end of physical examination, laboratory and radiological examinations, the stage of the pancreatic tumor, its relationship with neighboring organs, especially whether it has spread to adjacent vessels and/or distant organs, and the chance of surgical removal are evaluated. Surgery cannot be performed in advanced stage tumors. Along with the chemotherapy to be applied to these patients, some interventions can be applied to improve the comfort of life by correcting the existing jaundice, providing nutritional support and reducing pain. For this purpose, placing a tube (stent) that provides passage to the bile duct with endoscopy from the mouth through the stomach, draining the bile out with the help of a needle placed from the abdominal skin to the intrahepatic biliary tract with the help of a needle, advanced pain relief techniques,
Surgical Treatment: If  the tumor is suitable for surgical removal, ‘Whipple surgery’ is performed. In addition, if the tumor is located in the body and tail of the pancreas, relatively easier resection methods can be applied. Surgical removal of the tumor is the only cure for these patients. In pancreatic head tumors, surgery is more complicated since it is not possible to surgically remove only the head of the pancreas. In Whipple surgery; Together with the head of the pancreas, the gallbladder, part of the main bile duct, duodenum, part of the stomach and surrounding lymph nodes are removed as a block. 
Radiation Therapy:  Radiation therapy, also called radiotherapy, involves using high-energy rays to kill cancer cells. Radiation therapy only affects cells in the area being treated. Radiotherapy is applied alone or in combination with chemotherapy, especially if the location and size of the tumor complicates the surgery or in cases where surgery cannot be performed. Radiotherapy can be combined with chemotherapy to shrink the tumor before surgery. In some cases, radiotherapy may be given to prevent recurrences after surgery.
Chemotherapy:  It is the use of anticancer drugs to kill cancer cells. In pancreatic cancers, drug treatment called chemotherapy can be applied, taking into account the general conditions of the patients before or after surgery. Chemotherapy may be used in conjunction with radiotherapy to shrink the tumor prior to surgery or as a primary treatment in place of surgery. Surgery and radiotherapy have no place in extensive advanced disease. By administering chemotherapy to this group of patients, their quality of life can be significantly improved.
after treatment
Survival:  The chance of full recovery after surgery with early diagnosis is less than 50%. Anticancer drugs and radiation therapy increase the rate of recovery. However, survival rates are not good after surgeries that leave cancer cells behind or in cases where there is spread to neighboring organs.
Prevention:  In order to prevent pancreatic cancer, it is necessary to stay away from tobacco, eat a balanced diet, do regular exercise and get rid of excess weight. NOTE:  The text here is a general information and may vary depending on the patient and the condition of the disease, so consult with a Medical Oncology specialist for personal evaluation.
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littlestpersimmon · 8 months
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Hi friends. Was wondering if any of my followers can please share this gofundme.
This is my uncle, he has been homeless and struggling nearly all his life, and he has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. The gofundme is organized by my aunt, and I have so many followers on tumblr that helped me fund my mom's surgery and my close friend Allanah's own cancer treatment, I figured I could share this here bc of my large following. I've sold my own bike to help just with some of his medication, but rn am currently struggling as I am the sole caretaker of my own disabled mother, father and younger sister. Its breaking my heart to see someone struggle like this, and I would like my uncle to have a sliver of hope. Please consider sharing, I'm begging. There's only one donation so far, and it's only 5 euro.
He has an upcoming CT scan, which in the philippines would cost around 200 usd. I know this is a very sad and scary post, but you will be helping someone in the global south improve their quality of life. Thank you so so much for reading, and please have a good day. Thank you.
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bestgastroclinic · 2 years
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How to diagnose pancreatic cancer early?
 Introduction:
The pancreas is a tiny gland behind the stomach that looks like a hockey stick. Mutations in the pancreatic cells lead to their uncontrolled multiplication, resulting in pancreatic cancer forming a mass of tissue. This tumor is sometimes benign (not cancerous). Early diagnosis of pancreatic cancer is difficult because the pancreas is located deep within the body, and early tumors cannot be seen or felt during standard physical examinations. Symptoms normally do not appear until cancer has spread to other organs or has grown quite large.
Table of content:
Types of pancreatic cancer
Test for pancreatic cancer
pancreatic cancer treatment
pancreatic cancer treatment options
pancreas surgery
best pancreatic cancer treatment in Delhi
The main functions of pancreas include supporting food digestion and regulating blood sugar levels in the body. The pancreas helps in blood sugar regulation with the help of two hormones, insulin, and glucagon. Pancreatic cancer tends to spread to adjacent lymph nodes, then to the liver, peritoneum (the lining of the abdominal cavity), and lungs if not diagnosed early.
Exocrine and neuroendocrine tumors are the two types of pancreatic cancer tumors that form in the pancreas. Exocrine tumors account for over 93% of all pancreatic tumors, and adenocarcinoma is the most frequent kind of pancreatic cancer. When people are diagnosed with pancreatic cancer, it usually mean pancreatic adenocarcinoma. The most frequent kind is ductal adenocarcinoma, which starts in the pancreatic ducts.
The other 7% of pancreatic cancers are neuroendocrine tumors (NETs), also known as pancreatic NETs (PNETs), islet cell tumors, or islet cell carcinoma. Excess hormones are produced by some NETs. Insulinoma is a tumor in which excessive insulin is produced.
When someone visits the doctor after weeks or months of symptoms, they are frequently diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. Abdominal pain, weight loss, itching, and jaundice are common symptoms of  pancreatic cancer.
The lifetime risk of pancreatic cancer is approximately 1 in 64. A risk factor is something that increases your chances of contracting an illness. There are risk variables that are caused by behavior and lifestyle. These are some of the risk factors for pancreatic cancer:
Smoking cigarettes, cigars, and other tobacco products.
Obesity is a risk factor as well. Even if you are not obese, carrying excess weight around your waist is a dangerous factor.
Diabetes, particularly type 2 diabetes, is associated with obesity. The onset of diabetes at an older age in someone who has a healthy weight and BMI could be a symptom of pancreatic cancer.
Experiencing chemical exposure
Test for pancreatic cancer
To understand more about your symptoms, your doctor will inquire about your medical history. The doctor may also inquire about potential risk factors such as smoking and family history. He will evaluate you for signs of pancreatic cancer or other health issues. Pancreatic tumors can cause the liver or gallbladder to expand, which may be detected during the exam. Jaundice will be checked on your skin and the whites of your eyes (yellowing).
If the physical results are odd, your doctor will most likely order tests to assist identify the problem. Further tests and therapy may be recommended by a gastroenterologist (a doctor who specializes in digestive system diseases).
A doctor may prescribe a few diagnostic tests for pancreatic cancer like an imaging test, blood test, biopsies based on a person’s checkup, lab tests, and symptoms description.
A computer recreates several X-ray images into detailed images of the inside of the abdomen using computed tomography (CT scan). A CT scan aids in the diagnosis of pancreatic cancer.
Magnetic resonance imaging (MRI) generates comprehensive images of the abdomen using magnetic waves, particularly around the pancreas, liver, and gallbladder.
Ultrasound: Non-harmful sound waves reflected back from the organs in the abdomen produce images that could aid doctors in diagnosing pancreatic cancer.
PET scan (positron emission tomography): PET scans may aid in determining the extent to which pancreatic cancer has spread around the surrounding organs.
Blood test: Blood Investigations for liver function tests and tumor markers are done to screen the carcinogen in the body.
A pancreatic cancer diagnosis is likely but not certain if imaging investigations reveal a mass in the pancreas. Pancreatic cancer can only be diagnosed with a biopsy, which involves extracting real tissue from the tumor. Biopsies can be done via
Percutaneous needle biopsy: A radiologist inserts a needle into the mass under imaging guidance, collecting some tissue. Fine needle aspiration is another name for this operation (FNA).
Endoscopic retrograde cholangiopancreatography (ERCP) involves inserting a flexible tube with a camera and other equipment through the mouth into the small intestine near the pancreas. ERCP can obtain photos of the area as well as a tiny biopsy using a brush.
Endoscopic ultrasound: An endoscope is put near the pancreas, similar to ERCP. The mass is located using an ultrasonic probe on the endoscope, and tissue is extracted using a needle on the endoscope.
Laparoscopy is a surgery that involves multiple tiny incisions. A surgeon can use laparoscopy to collect tissue for biopsy and examine inside the abdomen to see if pancreatic cancer has spread.
Pancreatic cancer treatment
When diagnosis of pancreatic cancer is done at an advanced stage, treatment of pancreatic cancer becomes difficult.
The pancreatic cancer treatment option is determined by several factors, including the location of the tumor, its stage, your overall health, and whether the disease has progressed beyond the pancreas.
Pancreatic cancer Treatment option
includes:
Surgical Method: The malignant part of the pancreas is removed surgically (resection). It’s also possible to remove lymph nodes around the pancreas.
A pancreatectomy is a procedure that removes the pancreas or a portion of the pancreas. If your tumor is at the head of the pancreas (the broadest section of the pancreas near the small intestine), your doctor may consider the Whipple procedure. The head of the pancreas, the duodenum (the first piece of the small intestine), the gallbladder, and a portion of the bile duct are all removed during this surgery.
Radiation therapy is the use of high-speed energy to eliminate cancer cells.
Chemotherapy: It is a treatment that employs chemicals to kill cancer cells.
Immunotherapy: It is a treatment that assists your body in fighting cancer. Immunotherapy has been mainly ineffective against pancreatic cancer, however, it may help roughly 1% of people with the disease and a certain genetic mutation.
Targeted therapy: It is directed at certain genes or proteins that aid in the growth of cancer. A genetic testing is generally  used to see if a tailored therapy is good for you.
Before Pancreatic surgery, chemotherapy and/or radiation may be used to reduce the size of the tumor to ensure that all cancer cells are eliminated following surgery. Before the Pancreas Surgery is scheduled you should feel comfortable discussing pancreatic cancer treatment options with your healthcare team.
You and your doctor should also talk about how to avoid or minimize the negative effects of your treatment. Supportive or palliative care may include the activities:
Pain Management: To reduce the pain if medications failed.
Treatment for jaundice: Your healthcare practitioner may place a stent (tube) inside your bile duct to relieve your symptoms.
Reduced intestinal obstruction: A stent can be inserted to open up a blockage in your small intestine.
Controlling Diabetes: Your medical team can assist you in monitoring your blood sugar levels and managing your diabetic medication.
Supportive care can also assist you in understanding and processing your feelings, as well as those of your family and friends.
Best Pancreatic cancer treatment is available in Delhi NCR. The well-known distinguished gastroenterologist has come a long way in providing complete and comprehensive cancer treatment to patients from India and across the world. He is a liver specialist who specializes in therapeutic endoscopy and ERCP. He is an expert in procedures such as colonoscopy, endoscopy, ERCP, sigmoidoscopy, ultrasound, and capsule endoscopy, and also in the treatment of gastrointestinal issues and liver diseases. His versatile knowledge backed with years of experience makes him the most acknowledged surgeon in the field of gastroenterology, focusing on quality, care, and innovation. He along with his team ensures that every patient receives the best diagnosis and treatment. Every patient who comes to his clinic is initially diagnosed using the relevant tests. The goal of diagnosis is to determine the root cause of the medical illness or condition, diagnose it, and offer the best treatment possible.
Takeaway:
When uncontrolled cell growth occurs in a region of the pancreas, pancreatic cancer develops. Jaundice and stomach pain are major symptoms that may not develop until later stages. Early diagnosis of Pancreatic Cancer is challenging, making its treatment and prevention more difficult. Certain checks and tests are performed to determine the cause of signs and symptoms that could be caused by pancreatic cancer. If cancer is diagnosed, more investigations are done to evaluate cancer’s extent (stage) and to plan the treatment. This post was originally published here: https://www.drpiyushranjan.com/diagnose-pancreatic-cancer/
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ohtobeleah · 5 months
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Was It Over? // Jake Seresin
-> Chapter Six:: [Conflict & Chaos]
Summary: As panic consumes Jake after finding out about your current medical condition, Jake calls your mother to fill in the gaps. Nurse Lydia escapes being taken to her supervisor and Jake lets loose on his mother who tries to stop him from leaving.
Warnings: Sick!reader. Breast cancer diagnosis. Jake Seresin x F!reader. Angst, hospital & medical inaccuracies. SLOW BURN ROMANCE/ Inaccurate medical information. Relationship turmoil. Overbearing mothers.
Word Count: 4.4K
Author Note: Okay Sick!wifey maybe there is another guy. Or not, who knows. My guess is a platonic friendship that will ultimately end in heartbreak.
Series Masterlist | Main Masterlist
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November 2nd 
“You look like you've just been told you’re dying?” It was a voice you didn't recognise that pulled you out of the bottomless pit of worry you'd fallen into as you sat on the edge of the raised garden bed just outside your doctor's office. “It's okay, you were probably just told that so it's alright to look like your whole world’s just been flipped on its head.” The man shrugged as he came to sit beside you with his hands in the pockets of his jeans. 
“Sorry, sorry–” You shook your head as you wiped your tears and dried your face, probably as patchy and puffy as ever. “Are you a doctor here?” 
“Me?” the man smiled as he pointed to his chest with a scoff. “Oh no, no I'm uh–I’m a patient I guess.” The man corrected you as he watched you try to fix yourself up. Before you knew it there was a tissue being held out of you to take. 
“Thanks.” You smiled softly with gratitude and accepted the tissue the man wouldn't be wanted back anytime soon. 
“No problem.” He nodded. “I saw you come out of Doctor Parsons' office, she's got a pretty rough gig don't you reckon?” 
“I'll say.” You agreed, Doctor Parsons probably wanted to go into her profession to help people, but nowadays all it seemed like was she was dishing out hard to swallow diagnoses. “You’re a patent of hers too?” 
“Unfortunately, Pancreatic– what about you?” The man asked as you tried to wrap your head around the idea of exchanging diagnosis with another human being. 
“I uh–I was just told I have breast cancer.” This complete stranger was the first person you told, before you mum, before your ex husband, before your kids or extended family. This stranger who was sitting next to you outside your local doctors office was the first person beside your doctor to know you had cancer, that your cells were dying–that you were, in fact, dying. 
“Oh yeah? What's the going rate for that one?” This all seemed too normal, too calm to be talking about. It wasn't the reaction you'd ever expected although you weren't really thinking about how people would react. “Sorry, I'm being too nosy.” The man beside you reached out and extended his hand towards you. “I’m Jensen, I don't mean to pry, it's just I don't see an awful lot of young people come into this particular doctors office and when I saw you rush out like your world had just been rocked I couldn't help but to follow you out here.” Jensen smiled as you shook his hand. “I'm also incredibly self aware of how creepy that sounds, so again, I'm sorry.” 
“No no–” You chuckled as you let go of Jensen's hand. “It's okay, it's just uh, fresh I guess, like ten minutes ago fresh.” You tried to explain the best you could. “Y/n, my names Y/n–” 
“Damn Y/n that's hot off the press–” Jesne pressed his lips together in a fine line, he understood what it was like to feel the crushing weight of the world on your chest. He was only in for a chat with doctor Parsons the day he met you. “Listen, in the hopes of not being too forward, can I give you my number?” He asked with a caution laced between his words, ready for rejection. “Not in a, I'd like to take you out sometime, although I wouldn't be opposed.” You had to stop yourself from looking as shocked as you were. Were you really being picked up out the front of a doctor's surgery? “But in more of an I understand what you’re going through kinda way and if you ever need an ear to vent to about the not so glamorous journey you're about to go on, I'd very much like to be that person for you, I always wished I had someone when I first started my battle.” 
“Uh, yeah–” You couldn't help but to smile through the dried tears on your face. “Sure, yeah that sounds really nice actually.” WHen you unlocked your phone the realisation that Jake, your ex husband, had been the last person you called dawned on you. He didn't know, he could never know. He wouldn't care enough to want to know. And yet here this stranger was, willing and ready to listen. “And for the record maybe when the dust settles I wouldn't be opposed to the idea either.” 
***~***~***~***~***~
“I vow to be your faithful partner in sickness, and in health.” Jake could hear your vow’s ringing out inside his mind as he raced around his childhood bedroom getting his stuff packed to leave. Your voice sounded as if you were standing right before him, plaguing his mind with haunting memories of promises he’d failed to keep. 
“I promise to love you unconditionally, to honor and respect you, and bring you solace in times of need.” Your voice was like a hauntingly beautiful memory reminding him of the vows you’d promised each other on your wedding day, right after his father had told him that happiness was essentially a hallmark card scam. Jake could hardly focus as he tried to compose himself enough to just think about what was going on for a second—but then his own voice echoed around in his mind, the voice of his former self who hadn’t yet ruined his marriage spoke up through the darkness of his fuzzy and fragile mind. 
“I take you for better or worse, in sickness and in health, in chaos and conflict, through heaven and hell.” Jake felt an anger so deep and overwhelming that he stood from his twin bed and walked a few quick paces across his room to where his closest door was. The animalistic growl that left his body when Jake slammed his fist into the wooden door woke his mother who was sleeping soundly a room or two down the hall. She hadn’t been woken so abruptly like that in years. Not since her children were young adolescence. 
With his busted hand and a pain in his chest he could only describe as emotional turmoil, Jake stumbled back over to his bed and picked up his discarded phone. He mulled over the decision for a few seconds before he went through his contacts to find probably the only woman who could give him more of the story. 
Your mother, Mary O’Riley. Or as Jake affectionately called her for the better half of your relationship, Maz. 
Jake's thumb lingered over her contact for a few seconds before he decided that yes, yes he needed more information. He needed someone to tell him this was all just some sick fucked up prank. He needed someone to tell him that you were in fact, alright, and that you weren’t lying in a hospital bed right now, without him there to hold your hand and tell you everything would be okay. 
He’d promised you in sickness and in health. 
Jake listened with anticipation and dread as the phone rang against his ear. It rang and rang and rang until finally at the very last second she could—your mother picked up the phone while she sat at your bedside. 
“Jacob—“ He heard her coo into the speaker. “You—“
“Tell me she’s not sick Maz.” Was all Jake said. It was stern and filled with heartbreak. “Please, tell me right now that she’s not in the hospital right now.” Your mother could tell Jake was holding back tears through gritted teeth as she turned her head over to the nurses station to see Lydia almost hyperventilating over her mistake. “Maz! FUCKING TELL ME MY WIFE DOESNT HAVE BREAST CANCER!” 
The sudden outburst made your mum jump nearly out of her seat as she pulled her phone slightly away from her ear, but it didn’t surprise her. Jake loved you so much, it was only natural he’d be in a state of shock finding out the way he had. 
“Jake, sweetheart, I need you to sit down for me.” Mary cooed softly with a sincere expression of empathy. “Please, just sit down and I’ll explain what’s going on.” 
***~***~***~***~***~
Lydia had never felt more stressed in her very short lived career. Once she had hung up the phone with who she now knew was probably your ex husband, Lydia's immediate plan was to come clean to your mum as she sat by your bedside. Luckily, your condition post op was pretty good all things considered and instead of taking up another room in the ICU, your surgeon said that it would be best for your recovery to be placed back in the room you would see out the next few weeks of chemotherapy in. There was no escaping the oncology ward, not even a stroke could save you as it seamned. 
“Miss O’Riley?” Lydia’s voice shook as she walked into your hospital room to see you sleeping in a drugged out haze of pain relief post op. You weren't expected to be awake for another few hours or so to allow your brain time to rest. “I need to speak with you for a moment, if you have a second.” All of this was going on around you without your knowledge. And quite frankly you wouldn't have wanted to know anyway– I mean, who really wants to be told that their nurse accidentally rang your husband and violated your privacy accidently? Certainly not you. 
“Is something wrong with my daughter?” Your mother asked as she held your hand, watching at the monitor told her you were stable, that your heart was beating and that you, despite the odds, would survive another day. 
“No, no, your daughter seemed to be responding well post surgery–” Lydia's voice still shook with nervousness for the reaction her actions would invoke. “It's just that I’ve uh–” Lydia was only young, she had so much left to give to the healthcare industry, one mistake couldn’t end her career before it had even started could it? “I accidentally called your daughter's husband, I automatically assumed he would be her emergency contact because he was listed as her husband and–” Lydia tried to get her explanation out as quickly as she possibly could before your mother had a chance to speak. “I'm so sorry, I told him about her current medical condition.” 
“Oh god.” Your mother groaned as she looked back to where you laid peacefully unaware that Jake now knew about your whereabouts and health status. “She didn't want him to know, at least not yet anyway.” Your mother explained as she sighed and ran her hands over her face. 
“I'm so sorry, I just assumed and before I knew he was asking what the hell I was even talking about and then I looked further down the page and saw that you were listed as her emergency contact.” Lydia was currently seeing her entire career flash before her eyes. All your mother had to do was request to speak to her supervisor, request that she report she violated HIPAA, but she didn't. Your mother simply nodded and accepted the fact a young girl who was only just starting out had made a mistake wasn't life threatening. 
“It's alright, just uh, he’s going to come, if I know that man he's going to be on the first flight here so as my daughters medically proxy, can you please adjust her visiting list and add Jake Seresin to the list.” Your mother knew Jake would be calling any minute now and that he knew there was no vacation away. Now that he knew what was going on. Mary fished her phone out of her handbag and sat it on your bedside table in anticipation. She was almost going to set a timer just to see how long it would take her son in law to call. 
“You–you aren't going to report me?” Lydia was at this point, in tears. She was so overwhelmed that she could barely see. Your mother felt sympathy for the young woman and really didn't want to be a part of whatever reprimanding could come of a simple mistake. So, she simply shook her head, looked back at her phone for a fleeting moment before she turned to look at you and finally back to Lydia who couldn't have been more thankful for the words that came out of your mothers mother. 
“No dear, no I'm not going to report you, mistakes happen–” Your mother pressed her lips together in a fine line as she reached up to touch your cheek with the pad of her thumb. “My daughter knows that all too well.” 
***~***~***~***~***~
“Please, just sit down and I’ll explain what’s going on.” Jake listened to what Maz had said and he did what he was told. He had always respected your mum and her natural born wisdom that Jake clung to through the time he had known her. “Are you sitting down?” 
“Yeah, yeah i'm sittin.’” 
“Jake–” Maz sighed heavily into the phone. “Back in november when Y/n called you about taking the kids for christmas she was sitting in her doctors office.” Jake didn't speak, he listened carefully to every word your mother spoke. His head was spinning as his heart raced. Tears streamed down his cheeks as the realisation set in. “She’d just been told she has a very aggressive form of breast cancer– stage three A, triple positive grade three invasive doctoral carcinoma.” 
“Wh-why didn't she just tell me?” Jake knew that the two of you had never been more divided in your marriage, but he always thought that if you were sick to this level, that you'd call and he’d come running. Come hell or high water Jake was going back to Rhode Island to be with you. 
“That's a question you’ll just have to ask her.” Your mother replied. “But she's not alone, I'm with her right now, she uh–had a stroke only about an hour after she’d been admitted to oncology, good thing we were already in the hospital when it happened or else it could have been a hell of a lot worse.” 
“Maz–” Jake croaked out. “I don't know what I'm supposed to do.” He cried softly into the phone, it broke your mothers heart. “Tell me what I'm supposed to do.” He wasn't asking if he should get a ticket on the next flight out, no. No Maz knew exactly what Jake was asking her and again, it wasn't a question she held the answers to. 
“You just have to show up for her.” Was all your mother was able to say. “I dont have the answers this time Sweetheart, I’m not sure how to fix what's broken between the two of you, but I wanna know how soon you can get here–” Your mother paused as she tried to hold back her own tears. “She's not in a good way, she needs her husband Jake, she needs you here.”
Jake remembered that phone call, the one where you initially asked him to take the kids for christmas. He should have asked more questions, should have pressed you a little harder for information. Maybe, just maybe if he did back then, you would have crumbled and told him the truth. 
“I'll be there as soon as I can Maz, consider me on the next available flight.” 
***~***~***~***~***~
in sickness and in health, in chaos and conflict. It was the only thing Jake could tell himself over and over again as he walked down the large staircase of his parents place. in sickness and in health, in chaos and conflict. Jake had one thing and only one thing on his mind, getting back to you. 
“Jacob?” Jake froze as he got to the bottom of the staircase, his mother stood at the top, dressing gown pulled snug against her as she folded her arms across her chest and frowned down at her grown adult son. “What’s going on? It’s almost four in the morning?” 
“I just got off the phone with Maz—“ Jake explained as he watched his mum walk down the stairs, her eyes tired from a restless sleep. Having a home full of children and grandchildren didn’t help. “Y/n’s really sick, she’s uh—“ Jake wasn’t sure he wanted his mother to know about your diagnosis before he’d truly had a chance to process it himself. So, he didn’t divulge. “In the hospital, I just need to get back.” 
“Get back?” Janeen frowned in displeasure at her son's decision to leave. “What do you mean get back, you only just got here.”
“My wife’s in the hospital Ma, I need to go and make sure she’s alright.” Jake didn’t think he’d have to spell it out, but he did. “I promised her in sickness and in health, unfortunately she’s taken a turn for the worse and she’s at the very least right now the mother of my children, so I need to go and be with her and figure out what’s going on.” 
“Y/n is a grown woman who can take care of herself.” Janeen reached up to touch Jake's cheek, however, before she could run the pad of her thumb across Jake's scruffed cheek, he pulled away in anger. “She decided that when she left you? Or don’t you remember what that woman put you through?” 
“Ma.” Jake clenched his jaw under the dim light of the main foyer. “I love you, I do, but you need to stop disrespecting her.”
“Disrespecting her?” Jake's mother scoffed as she watched him pick up his duffel bag and head towards the front door. “What about the disrespect she showed this family? The disrespect she showed you when she was unfaithful to her wedding vows and left you! She took your kids away from your Jacob and what? You’re running back to her the second she gets a runny nose?” Jake was holding his tongue between his teeth as his mother followed him out to the cars, he’d already called a taxi. “Honestly I never in a million years thought you’d settle for someone so—“
“MUM!” Jake snapped abruptly, he wasn’t proud of raising his voice with the woman who raised him, gave him life, but my god did she need to back off. “SHUT, THE HELL, UP!” Jake hissed as he saw headlights coming up the drive. “I’m leaving my children here until I figure out what’s going on but so help me god if I get back and your attitude hasn’t done a full three sixty about my wife, the love of my life, you will never see her, or our kids, or me, again!” 
Janeen remained silent as she watched the taxi Jake had called pull up to where they were standing. She watched with teary eyes as he threw his bag into the back seat and greeted the driver kindly. He was an older gentleman. Probably mid sixties. 
“I will call you when I know more but you have to stop degrading her, I’m the one who drove her away.” Jake had wanted to say this since the first comment his mother ever made about you way back in January just after he’d told her the two of you were separating. Jake took his mother in his arms, he towered over the smaller built woman with graying hair. He let his chin rest on the top of her head and didn’t hold back. 
“Just because you never had the courage to leave dad when he stopped loving you the way he should doesn’t mean you get to project your pity on my wife for doing what you always wished you should have.” Jake had never felt such a weight lifted off his chest and immediately knew that the chances of him being invited back for next years Seresin family Christmas was probably a long shot. “You should ask Jasmine about her new nanny.” Jake finished as he pulled away. “I heard she's a really good people pleasure.” 
***~***~***~***~***~
“Ordinary streets, Extraordinary stories.” Jake read over your shoulder as you jotted down some ideas for your latest project. “Huh, I like that, it's sorta catchy.” He smiled softly against your cheek before leaving a gentle kiss in his wake. His eyes lingered down to your book proposal for your publisher and continued reading as you sat at your desk, glued to your laptop like a woman on an impossible mission against time. “This collection of stories centers on the idea of ‘accidental death’ and the upheaval caused in the lives of those who lost a loved one in this way.” Jake read outloud over your shoulder in the dimly lit office. “I'm starting to think I should sleep with the lights on at night.” 
“One eye open will do.” You mumbled back as you re-read your last sentence and continued on typing like your husband wasn't trying to coax you away from your work. “I have a deadline to meet, so shoo fly, don't bother me.” You teased as Jake moved your hair to one side and began to kiss the juncture of your neck and shoulder. Seduction was usually his strong suit. 
It was no shock to Jake that almost immediately out of college you started writing non-stop about the things you were most passionate about. He thought you'd stick it out and become some wildly successful fiction novelist. Perhaps lean into your fascination with dystopian hierarchy, but no. You really came out of the left field when you picked up a publishing gig to write and publish not one, but three true crime biographies. The little bookshop on firth you worked at were so overjoyed for you when you’d told them the big news. 
“You are working yourself to the bone, Honey.” Jake replied softly as his hands trailed down your stomach to feel the small but swelling baby bump that was growing bigger by the day. 
“Says the guy still in his flight suit–” You fired right back without taking your eyes off the screen of your laptop. Your fingers worked fast to type the thoughts in your mind onto the screen before they were forgotten. If you let your mind wander too far away you'd lose your momentum. “Jake, I need to finish this chapter before bed.” 
“No, no, what you need Hon, is to close your laptop and follow me to where I've run you a bath for your surely aching muscles, swollen feet and to ward off that impending cold I know you're coming down with.” Jake caught the way your fingers froze across the keys of your laptop at his thoughtful words, you hadn’t even mentioned feeling under the weather yet. “I heard you sniffling while cooking dinner–thought I better be proactive and try help you sweat it out.” 
You felt the heat in your cheeks rising as a smile crept across your face. You looked down at the ring on your left ring finger and tried not to cry. You could have blamed it on the raging pregnancy hormones from the twin Seresin babies currently using your body as a host, but you knew it was just the overwhelming love you felt. 
“You ran me a bath?” It was something you didn't know you needed until Jake had mentioned it. 
“Not to toot my own horn or nothin but I lit your favorite candles too, even went as far as to put a few rose petals in the bubbles.” Jake watched as you spun around in your chair to face him with big teary eyes and an even bigger baby bump. “Gotta look after my girl, can't have the mother of my children feeling sick, now can I?” 
“I'm intrigued to see what kind of special treatment I'll receive if I'm ever really unwell if this is what I'm getting for a runny nose.” You teased as Jake helped you up off your work chair. His hand went straight to the small of your back to guide you out of the study down the hall towards the bathroom where he had everything set and sorted for you. 
“Hopefully we never get to the point where you're chronically ill.” Jake kissed your temple as he walked with you. “Never wanna see you sicker than a cold.” He explained as your eyes went wide with wonder and ore at the sight of your bathroom fully lit with candles. “But trust that I'll be right by your side, holding your hand through whatever may come.” 
“You really didn't have to do all this for me.” You sighed as Jake started to help you undress. You watched him with love filled eyes through the mirror as his hands roamed your body, stripping articles of clothing from your pregnant silhouette.  
“Nonsense, I'll always do things like this for you.” Jake shrugged it off like his actions were no big deal. To him at that moment they really weren't, he was just trying to help wherever he could. “But you should probably wake up now–” 
“What do you mean?” A slow steady beeping broke through your mind as your body began to feel numb.  “Jake—“ You frowned as the bathroom faded around you. “Jake?” You called out as you felt yourself feeling heavy and lethargic. “Jake—?” 
“Sweetheart can you hear me?” Your mother asked as your surgeon tried to assess your ability to open your eyes. The small light that was shining in your eyes did little to cure your confusion. 
“Jake?” You asked again as your eyes fluttered open, you groaned softly in annoyance to the light of the hospital room you woke up in. “Where’s Jake?” Everything was so blurry, so confusing, the last thing you remembered was getting ready for a bath, now you where here in a hospital room. 
“He’s not here Sweetheart, do you remember what happened?” When you didn’t answer your doctor interjected to jog your memory. 
“You had a minor stroke Mrs Seresin, lucky for you you were already on sight when it happened—do you remember why you’re here?” As you looked around at the Christmas lights that now decorated your hospital room and the small Christmas tree in the corner on the coffee table near the old recliner, you remembered. 
“Oh.” That’s right you thought to yourself, you were separated. Jake didn’t care, not anymore. He’d stopped running baths for you years ago. “Oh, yeah—I remember.” You whispered before a single tear ran down your face. 
“I remember everything.” 
***~***~***~***~***
Tags: @blindedbythelightt @starset21 @tayl0rhuynh @mamachasesmayhem @marvelogic @itsmytimetoodream @maverick-wingman @kodzukenmaaa @eternalsams @seitmai @nota-professional l @jessicab1991 91 @hardballoonlove @senawashere @lafrone @fanficfandomlove @withahappyrefrain @dizzybee03 @maisie-rebloging-blog @goldenseresinretriever @a-reader-and-a-writer @sunlightmurdock @shelbycillian @memoriesat30 @accioprocrastination @the-aspiring-fanfic-writer @athenabarnes @eternallyvenus
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orphicdreamers-wp · 4 months
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I Know The End — Nico Hischier
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Summary; In which a rumor started turns into you staring the end of your lifelong dream in the eye
Content Warnings: Blackmail, false accusations of assault, mentions of cancer, mentions of blood, mentions of suicidal thoughts, mentions of death during childbirth, angst, Jack & Luke Hughes acting out of character, pick me fem oc(Julia), Nico being caught in the crossfire, inaccuracies of being banned from the NHL, female NHL player
Pairing: Nico Hischier & Fem Reader
You had always loved hockey, your father held the highest pride in his only daughter enjoying his favorite sport. He’d played hockey briefly for a professional team in Germany when you were really young. So it didn’t come as a surprise to him when you decided you wanted to play hockey as well. He was reserved to let you play, your mother had died a few years earlier. She died during childbirth with your younger brother, Vincent and your dad didn’t want to lose you too. But reluctantly he agreed to let you play, because he saw how much you loved it.
So you played hockey from your seventh year in school and you eventually made it onto the Professional Women’s League’s Boston team for about a year and a half. But that wasn’t where you heart was. Your father had encouraged you to go for the NHL, but he didn’t make it to your draft. He had been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and had stopped responding to treatment just weeks before the draft was scheduled. He had passed away the night before you were drafted by the New Jersey Devils.
You knew before you were drafted that playing on a team with a bunch of guys wouldn’t be easy. You knew that you would find yourself the brunt of the jokes and facing a lot of hazing from the men. But you didn’t mind it, as long as you got to do what you loved you didn’t mind if the men who were on your team hated you and the idea of you being there. As time progressed only one of the players really seemed to be okay with your presence, Nico seemed to enjoy being around you. Whenever the team won and would go out to celebrate Nico always kindly extended the invitation to you, knowing the other guys weren’t.
You rarely accepted but whenever you did you found yourself enjoying the time spent with Nico and occasionally the other players when they were in decent enough moods to tolerate you. So it wasn’t a surprise when you and Nico wound up intertwined in each other and eventually became a couple. But that never would have worked out, not in a million years. So you and him broke up and within a month he was already seeing someone new. Her name was Julia, and you liked her enough. She was smart and kind. But if you knew then that she would be the reason your in the position you are you would have never spoken to her.
You were leaned against the boards untaping your stick after practice when your head coach Lindy Ruff approached you, “I need to see you in my office now.” You were taken aback by the urgency in his tone as you could feel eyes on you. You frowned slightly as you made your way to his office. You raised an eyebrow as you walked into a room full of men, you were used to it so you sat down and waited as an uncertain feeling loomed over your head.
Coach Ruff spoke ever so gently, as if he was scared of your reaction to the news he had, “I’m sure you know Comissioner Gary Bettman, Director of Officiating Stephen Walkom, Security Officer Miles Anderson and this is attorney Leslie Ryans.” You furrowed an eyebrow further growing confused, “What’s going on coach?” Coach Ruff blew out a deep breath, “Over the past 2 days a lot of rumors have been circulating regarding you and some unacceptable behavior.” You frowned, “I haven’t seen anything, what are you referring to?”
Coach Ruff slid a folder across the desk and you stared at the papers inside. It was printed out screenshots from a Twitter account. The tweet was from Nico’s current girlfriend, Julia. It went in depth of an alleged assault she experienced because at your hands because you were jealous of her and her relationship with Nico. You frowned as you shut the folder and dropped it on the desk, “Coach you don’t seriously believe I could do that, do you?”
Coach Ruff shook his head, “This was not the decision made by just me Y/N. This was all the coaching staff here’s decision. Along with Director Walkom. But most importantly this was Commissioner Bettman’s decision. It looks bad for the organization. I’m sorry but the only choice I have is to remove you from my roster and tell you that you are barred from the team and the NHL as a whole for the foreseeable future.”
You shook your head as you stood up, feeling your voice raise, “This is unfair to me. You all just sat behind a closed door and unanimously decided that my career and my reputation were worthless while you believed baseless claims about me that have nothing to back them up?” You ran a hand over your damp cheeks, “How the hell is this fair to me?”
Coach Ruff shook his head, “It’s out of my hands. Pack your stuff.” You shook your head, “How can you do this to me? To reach deep inside of me and pull out everything I have ever worked for and throw it on the ground so carelessly? I resent it.”
A sob wracked through your chest as you took a deep breath, “This is bullshit. I shouldn’t have left Germany, I can’t believe your taking the last piece of my dad away from me. I resent that and I resent you all for that.” You opened the door to the office and were met with Nico, Jack and Luke sporting solemn expressions. Your eyes were bloodshot and stained with tears.
You walked past them and began to empty the contents of your locker. Nico spoke quietly, “Are you okay?” You glared at him as you dropped some of you items into the box, “Like you care.” You dropped the last items in your box as you began to untape the photos of you and your dad and your friends in various places. You picked up your box, the past 4 years of your life amounting to a single box. You sighed as you walked past Nico, “Keep your lying ass bitch away from me. Or god help me it won’t be a rumor anymore.”
Nico frowned at your words, “What the hell is she talking about?” Luke let out a defeated sigh, “This.” He handed Nico his phone as Nico slowly digested the information he was reading. He handed Luke his phone as he found himself driving to Julia’s house. The door opened and Julia smiled widely at the sight of her boyfriend, “Hi baby!” Nico’s tense demeanor didn’t shift, “Why would you post that? I know that’s a lie, why?” Julia’s face paled, “Why do you care? It’s not about you!”
Nico scoffed, “Because you just got her fired for good. She’s banned from the NHL, not just fined. This was the most important thing to her. Why would you do that?” Julia’s voice lowered, sounding similar to a small child who was in trouble, “Jack asked me to get rid of her.” Nico’s eyes widened, “What?” Julia’s eyes watered, “Jack told me that if I didn’t find a way to get her off the team he would tell you about me and Dawson.” Nico raised an eyebrow, “What about you and Dawson?” Julia sniffled, “We hooked up at that party Jack threw.” Nico scoffed, “I don’t care. We’re over, fix this.”
A good month had passed and you had finally accepted that you were done in the NHL. You were packing up your apartment in New Jersey so you could move home to Germany with your grandparents and finally start school. Your phone rang, you frowned slightly as you read Nico’s name across the screen and answered, “Hey what’s up?” Nico’s soft voice filled your ears, “Check Twitter.” You frowned as you opened the Twitter app on your phone when Nico hung up.
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You frowned as your phone began to ring endlessly, teams leaving voicemails telling you that they’d love to have you, Coach Ruff leaving messages apologizing and asking you to return. A message from Nico made you smile briefly. He told you to do what you already knew to do. You smiled as you typed out a quick response ‘I did. Check Twitter’
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glennk56 · 2 months
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William Hootkins in the 2000s
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In 2001 William Hootkins worked with Director Peter Chelsom for the third time in the comedy Town & Country starring Warren Beatty and Diane Keaton.
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He also appeared in vampire movie The Breed in 2001.
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In January 2002, he appeared in TV Movie The Magnificent Ambersons.
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These photos are from the Screening of The Magnificent Ambersons. Notice the difference in height between William Hootkins and James Cromwell. Hootkins was a foot shorter. 5'7" vs 6'7".
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In 2004 Hootkins was in Blessed, a supernatural Horror Thriller starring Heather Graham. Filmed in Romania, November 2003.
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William Hootkins was in an episode of The West Wing as a translator. Hootkins learned Mandarin at Princeton University and that is what most likely got him this job but he was never shown speaking Mandarin or even got a close-up. This episode was shown in December 2004, one month before he was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. I don't know when it was filmed but he must've been dealing with symptoms (pain, jaundice, worsening diabetes) at the time.
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William Hootkins made 3 appearances on film in 2005. He was diagnosed with Pancreatic Cancer in January and passed away in October. There was the comedy film Dear Wendy that was shown at the Sundance Film Festival in January 2005 but it was filmed in late 2003. There was an episode of Absolute Power starring Stephen Fry that aired in August 2005. I don't have photos of these two. The last credit is from Colour Me Kubrick (photos above) which was shown in France at the Dinard Festival of British Cinema in October 2005, however this was filmed in early 2004. So his last appearance on film was either on the TV shows The West Wing or Absolute Power.
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In 2003, William Hootkins played Alfred Hitchcock in Hitchcock Blonde in the London Theatre to great acclaim. Hootkins worked hard for this role learning Hitchcock's mannerisms and accent. There were plans to bring the production to Broadway in 2005 where he would've been eligible to win a Tony Award. This never happened once he was diagnosed with Cancer.
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nbgwen · 15 days
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Expectations vs Reality
ok - so I need to just put this out there. Me making a Rolan will not happen fast. My life is kinda insane. I work full-time, I have MS (and other crap/MH stuff), hubs has Parkinson's, kiddo 1 (24) moved back home, kiddo 2 (21) doesn't live at home but has FASD and can be a lot, kiddo 3 (10) is just a plain active kiddo. Plus I have a pets. Our basement flooded - only and inch or two, but it was everywhere and won't be done anytime soon due to finding water seeping from one of the walls. Oh, and my mom got diagnosed with pancreatic cancer.
I could actually go on about my hot mess of a life, but I just want to put this out there to temper expectations. I'm super stoked about making Rolan, like crazy stoked. But - if I want to do it right, and take notes to possibly share the pattern if I manage it, then it's going to be months of work, probably. Maybe. Depends on energy, time, and funds. FUN! Most of my yarn was in my basement, so I'll have to pick up what I need as I go. For now, I have his body yarn (that sounds so weird).
I promise to post pictures of the progress. I'm very transparent - if I fuck it up, or life goes to shit, I'll say so. It may only be one or two folks interested, but that's enough for me! Is this my anxiety talking, absolutely. But I'm 50 and have few fucks left to give.
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celticcrossanon · 1 month
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Dear Celta -
Sending best wishes for your family friend in hospital.
Saw this posted today - afraid it might be legit?
https://x.com/intouchweekly/status/1771129804919537991?s=20
"Less than two months after Buckingham Palace confirmed King Charles III was diagnosed with cancer, sources exclusively reveal to In Touch that the king is battling pancreatic cancer and has been given two years to live."
Mar 23 Ask
Hi Nonny,
Thank you for the best wishes. They definitely helped.
I think that is another tabloid magazine making up something out of nothing. I have had friends die from pancreatic cancer and 1. they deteriorated a lot faster than King Charles and 2. the prognosis is never 'you have x years left', especially given the survival rates for that form of cancer.
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ascendingaeons · 1 month
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The Story Behind My "Hymn to Sekhmet"
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I was very surprised with how much traction my Hymn to Sekhmet has gotten… so I decided to share the story behind it. This might be quite long, but I think a lot of you would appreciate it.
I have been an eclectic pagan for most of my life. Heathenry was my focus in that sense that I worked with the Vanir and studied runology since I was fifteen. Kemeticism was my passion since childhood, but I was never formally a devotee. I pretty much worked exclusively with Set for most of my life. Our relationship is somewhere between father and son and student and guide. In the summer of 2020, I decided to finally set up a Kemetic altar.
It comprised of three statues and three candles on a small, very old nightstand and was otherwise unadorned. One statue was to Set, another to Bast, and the third to Sekhmet. I focused exclusively on Set and Bast for a while. I was afraid of Sekhmet. I read every book I could find about Her and they nearly all had one thing in common about a Sekhmet-based practice: if you cannot do it yourself, do not ask Her about it. That really intimidated me to the point I took Her statue down several times before it earned a permanent place.
One day in September of 2020 I finally prayed to Sekhmet with an offering of cold water. I felt a circular window of fire about 16 inches in diameter open up in front of my face just above my altar. It felt hot, like the heat of a campfire. I felt that She was looking at me. After a few seconds, the window disappeared. I didn’t interact with Her for a while after that.
In November of 2020, my dad was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer. He was given six months to live and chemotherapy was prescribed. I was immediately thrust into the role of caregiver. I drove my dad to and from chemotherapy, gave him his meds and food, helped him to the bathroom, cleaned him up, and anything else I could do. I was awake for about 22 hours a day for six months, even with the help of a hospice company.
One night, when my dad was on respite (what hospice companies call when a patient is sent to a nursing home for a few days so the caregiver can recover), I felt… really bad. I felt alone, afraid, numb, and lost. Without any offering or formality, I prayed to Bast. I asked Her to just stay with me. I suddenly felt myself wrapped up in a blanket of what felt like bubblegum-pink energy. It felt like stuffed animals, cotton candy, a fuzzy quilt, and just… pure love. I later learned that this describes the higher heart chakra’s energy but to me, it was just Bast. She hugged me like that for about an hour until She decided I was okay, and then, very much like a cat, She left.
The days went on with barely any sleep, a lot of emergencies and scares, until one day my dad was finally asleep. It was around four in the afternoon. I was thinking a lot about Sehkmet at this point and Her domain of healing. It was very near and dear to my heart. At the time I was thinking of going back to school to finish my psychology degree and become a counselor. I took the time to get cold water in a nice glass and some fresh bread I had delivered that morning. I put it all on a golden plate I ordered for my altar.
I prayed to Sekhmet, solemnly and respectfully, naming Her Epithets and offering praise in addition to water and bread. I asked… that She let everything be okay and help me to be a better caregiver to my dad. The sad thing is, I was very hard on myself. I felt like I was not doing enough but I later found out that every nurse and social worker from the hospice company had, individually and separately, reported to the company’s administrator in high praise of me. I didn’t know then that some caregivers are really horrible to the point of neglect and abuse. I was doing the best I could in a situation that was out of my control and was given a level of praise that floored me.
After concluding my prayer, I lay down in my bed next to my altar. I was lying on my side when suddenly Sekhmet’s etheric body manifested beside me. I could feel it and somewhat see it with my third eye. She started to rub my back as I lay there. Her hand felt like the sun’s heat reflected off of water, a sensation I knew well from fishing in summer. It felt almost like fire but one that would never burn me. As She rubbed my back, I felt Her head come next to mine. I felt Her face, soft and bristly, next to my left ear as She began to speak words I couldn’t hear. I could even feel the heat from Her breath.
Unlike Bast, Sekhmet stuck around. She followed me everywhere for the next two days. It hadn’t really sunk in yet but I had received what, for me, was irrefutable proof of the Gods’ love. Set was with me my entire life, my teacher and friend. Bast and Sekhmet creaked open the door to theurgy a little bit more. It wasn’t until my Reiki Attunement ceremony that the door was blown clean off its hinges when over a dozen Netjeru physically manifested. During my Attunement, Bast held my left hand and Sekhmet held my right. By the end of the ceremony, the two were hugging me as I lay on my teacher’s table.
As I began working with the Netjeru in my shamanic practice, Sekhmet communicated something to me. She asked me to offer Her my pain and fear. And so I wrote that hymn on what was proving to be a very hard day.
I can never go back to a world where the Gods do not exist or do not love us completely, irrevocably, and unconditionally. My relationship with the Netjeru is one of mutual loyalty, love, admiration, and service. For all intents and purposes, I am a new Kemetic. I have studied Egyptology since I was seven years old and regarded Kemet as a far-flung home, a feeling that has never left my heart since it ignited there when I was a toddler. But that is a story for another day.
Well… that is my story. I hope it finds you well!
Dua Sekhmet! Dua Netjeru!
Image is “Sekhmet Devotional” by Valoreanthes. A Mother Lioness and Her cub, a side of Sekhmet far too often overlooked.
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halogen2 · 2 months
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hey yall ! my mom has started posting her artwork on instagram and selling prints + other merch on pixels, so i thought i would share in case anyone wants to support her <3
for those who dont know my family's situation: my mom was diagnosed with stage 4 pancreatic cancer a little over a year ago, and we recently found out the chemos stopped working and are moving toward hospice. my mom taught herself to paint two years ago, and she's wanted to share her artwork for a long time now but only recently got around to it. ive been helping her take/upload photos of her paintings. she's still painting and creating every day, and she has about 20+ paintings already done that need to be uploaded, so there will be lots more art to share!!
so if anyone wants to give her account a follow or buy a few greeting cards, here are the links!! <3
instagram
shop
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toastedkiwi · 9 months
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How was intern life growing up?
It was pretty normal until she was ten. Her mother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. She died. Her dad died when she was 14 after they were in a car wreck going up to look up Ivy League schools for her. She knows for a fact he would’ve been alive if the doctors hadn’t forgotten about him. She’s got her grandpa though and he’s a very grumpy man which is why she can easily handle Bruce’s and Damian’s grumpiness.
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