#OTHERS TO EXPERIENCE IT AND UNDERSTAND ME’ momence | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

boimgfrog · 3 years

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THE LONG AWAITED MATCHABLOSSOM LONG FIC REC LIST:

Kaoru pining momence:

Long-Lasting Husband Material

15k words

Summary: A fact about Kojiro Nanjo and his soft, big heart; he was in love with his best friend. And he was an adult, so admitting that was so much more embarrassing than it should be.

It didn’t help that he had been feeling this way for fifteen whole years.

Kaoru had to double-check his brain. Yup, he definitely put the words ‘Kojiro’ and ‘Husband’ together in a sentence. His brain put the words together and they fit. The words fit better than any puzzle Kaoru had ever solved. What.

Or, the one where Joe is the perfect husband material and Cherry only realizes that after getting smacked in the head with a longboard.

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

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Cherry realizes he's been pining for years and then can't stop realizing it. When I tell you this fic made me so fucking happy- I'm a big fan of hurt/comfort but this fic is just comfort. The ending will make you feel so held.

the brightest shade of sun

Summary: Kojiro's looking at him in that funny way again, exasperated but fond. "Nah," he says, easily. "I just saw you."

12k words

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

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summary's vague as hell but!! Kojiro and Kaoru move in together, and Kaoru realizes. hm. maybe he's a bit dependent on his friend. and hm. maybe he's also a little bit in love too. Honestly, the little moments and details between them really make this fic 10/10. just. gosh it's so good.

Kojiro pining momence:

The inevitability of falling in love

Summary: There are things that are inevitable in life, for Nanjo Kojiro it's that he will fall in love with Kaoru.

Or,

Kojiro falls in love with Kaoru and then just keeps falling in love

14k words

Rating: Mature

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Joe falling in love with Cherry and then just. pines for years. fuck I love him. there are so many good scenes in this one, a couple that made me genuinely tear up, 10/10

falling for you

Summary: You know what they say: the best way to figure out that you’re in love with your best friend is to watch them fall in love with someone else.

(Alternatively: Kaoru’s got a crush, Kojiro’s got a crush, and it all goes wrong before it goes right.)

11k words

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

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teen Kojiro my beloved,, gosh this one is just really sweet.

An Ordinary Pain

Summary: Kojiro and Kaoru have had a lot of injuries and hurts over the years, but they always manage to take care of each other.

(or, h/c throughout the ages)

18k words

Rating: Explicit

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The true beauty of this fic lies in the subtleties in their interactions, the way the author described everything was just,, just so perfect.

Fics where Kojiro helps Kaoru move on/heal after Adam (tw for abusive relationships in all of them):

Hey Street Boy, Want Some Style?

- or-

Summary: Kaoru learned to skate to get away from the police.

Kojiro learned to skate to make sure Kaoru actually did.

from high school to present day, Kojiro and Kaoru grow up, mess up, and eventually figure their shit out

38k words

Rating: Explicit

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DEAR GOD. This one is just so beautifully written??? like holy fucking shit. I read it in an afternoon and spent the rest of the night thinking about it.

Divinity

Summary: “I don’t need anyone,” Kaoru whispers. He’s always been good at making bad decisions when it comes to Kojiro; this is another in a long line of failures and he’s not willing to admit yet that maybe Adam fucked him up past the point of no return. “It’s fine,” he mumbles when he hears Kojiro shifting. He’s too afraid to watch him walk away. “You can just go.”

And instead of leaving, Kojiro shuffles forward and hugs him. Kaoru is surrounded by impossibly gentle arms and the scent of pine, and though he’s used to the latter, he hasn’t been touched like this in a long, long time. “I’m not going to go,” Kojiro says softly. His face is buried in Kaoru’s shoulder, lips warm where they brush across his skin. “I’d say sorry, but I’m not, Kaoru. I don’t want to.”

11k words

Rating: Explicit

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this is another really good one, more smut focused than the first one, but like,, in a therapy way?? idk how to explain it but. fuck. yes.

C.E.E

Summary: After spending years in an abusive relationship, Cherry takes it upon himself to engage in what he describes as "corrective emotional experiences". When his safety is threatened during a hook up, he finds himself accepting Joe's offer of:

"Use me. Whatever you need to do, do it with me."

Can Cherry navigate the complicated dark feelings that have lingered for years while juggling (denied) feelings for Joe?

25k words

Rating: Explicit

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When I tell you I am obsessed. phew, okay, just the way the author writes Cherry?? The way the author writes Joe???? I swear nobody understands these characters better. like. fucking hell I simply cannot sing this fic's praises enough.

The 900

Summary: “You haven’t skated since your beef with Adam, have you?” Kojirou says, and Kaoru feels that brick fly right through his glass house.

10k words

Rating: Explicit

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This one is just *chefs kiss*. The dialogue is what really made it stand out to me, it's so in-character and realistic and I want to kiss the author on the mouth for it.

Misc:

Cookin’ like a chef (i’m a five star Michelin)

Summary: Kaoru was going to punch Kojiro if he didn’t stop laughing.

“I know what a bento is,” he hissed through gritted teeth. “I would like to know WHY there is a bento on my desk.”

A secret admirer starts to leave bento boxes on Kaoru’s desk in his senior year. He says he hates it, but after a while, it grows to be something he looks forward to every morning.

17k words

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

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Kaoru's POV in this is just. I mean it's everything to me, quite literally. The ending really got me, honestly, this whole fic is just lovely.

i've got these habits that i cannot break

Summary: miya puts on his most pitiful face and tucks himself into joe’s side. “my dads are getting divorced,” he says, trying to sound like the very subject of conversation puts him close to tears. he feels joe’s chest constrict, like he’s trying to hold in a reaction, and miya digs one of his nails into his friend's side. if joe laughs now, not only will miya commit homicide, but the victim will be one specific head chef.joe’s chest relaxes and he says, in the same sad tone as miya, “he was cheating on me with the head chef at his restaurant."

14k words

Rating: Teen and Up Audiences

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This one had me dying- Miya playing matchmaker by forcing Joe and Cherry to be his fake dads. yes I know, I know, they'd be awful dads. I don't care, this fic is my favorite fucking thing.

#jay says a thing #matcha blossom #matchablossom #sk8 #joecherry #joe x cherry #these all slap tho like they all fuck so hard

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nobody-knose--archive · 3 years

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i’ve been aching to commentate spirit phone’s commentary for ages. glad i finally got around to it, this was an ejoyable experience. liveblog below the cut

-i'm like half certain i've heard this commentary before. maybe not the whole way through & it was probably actual years ago

-nice hearing stuff like this. in-depth personal view of the album-making process. makes it seem like more of a real thing i could do myself someday

-neil cicierega real person momence

-i could probably go real in depth about neil cicierega/tally hall parallels specifically concerning like. the arc of their musical careers. but i won't, here

-wild how i legitimately don't care much about micheal jackson

-didnt we get a bunch of spirit phone stems from the needlejuice release/his patreon? we could probably hear the funny track he speaks of here in that

-i love hearing musical artists, especially neil cicierega, talking about the meanings of their songs. like, not only has this song been claimed to hell & back by the tumblr gays, but with later ones i just can't see where he gets these ideas from. also, claiming there's any one meaning or plot to a song just seems silly to me

-shoutout to neil reusing a midi from like, 1998, that he made at 12 years old, whose entire melody was reused for the main verses of everybody loves raymond. loved finding that out on my own 2 years ago. now it's common trivia in this fandom. not bad times

-it'd be neat if neil did individual trans tracks here like he did with view monstel, those things are half of why i consider it my favorite album

-it's a lot easier to ignore the creator's intended meaning behind a song when he can't even remember it. thanks neil

-seesaw effect

-and there's my joke all but 1 of my followers wont get. moving on

-what kinds of movie theater lobbies has neil been to where there are arcade machines. i mean im not one to talk but that does sound rather strange

-why do songs' titles even need to be taken from the lyrics. ive never seen that as any sort of requisite. it's like titling any form of prose you can just give it whatever name ya like

-"this part sounds pretty cool right"

-is neil's vocal range only mildly better than mine? with training i could change that

-oh i haven't processed any of the last 25 seconds hold on

-god. a shit ton of vocal modification in this song. it's like neil returned to his roots but with quality this time

-i, as an ace/aro, have never related more to an allohet guy in my life. what is the point of eyes!

-professional humming/whistling takes skill. it's different from the recreational or casual stuff. i'd know

-there's a name for the way sound (especially music) gets distorted when moving past you and i can't remember it but it's probably what neil's referring to here in the way he recorded the intro

(- update: it's the doppler effect no need to tell me cas already did)

-as someone who hasnt seen the rugrats or take me there by blackstreet i'll just say it sounded like a bouncy music box melody. nice to hear a song that messes with the typical scales though. lydian & diatonic.

-that's a rather specific thing to be glad about, but given what he talked about in his last full audio commentary about the jew harp i suppose i'm not surprised

-i know that tmbg song now. listened to it & saw the music video too. yep they're different alright

-where the hell does neil get all these instrumence from anyway

-huh. hadnt heard this part of the commentary before making my oc concerning this song but i like to hear neil's approval concerning part of my interpretation

-i love how ive heard a billion different tellings of this mellified man story from lem dem fans talking about this song and neil's is by far the wildest

-good god that does only make it worse neil

-i love making liveblogs of lemon demon albums. with the fullerenes or tally hall i cant name a specific dude to take out my woes on generally but with lemon demon i can just say neil all the time. i like being on a casual first name basis with this dude ive never interacted with once ever

-is sweet bod the one other than cabinet man with a demo in the bonus tracks? i forget

-holy shit the boston molasses disaster someone call up soapy if it doesnt already know, it'd love this

-two thousand nine. god i miss the fiddle solo. the ver with it is truly the best one

-he pronounces it jeff? i've always read it as gef with a hard g. that's what i get for knowing words that are never spoken aloud

-that's a fun meta interpretation of this ghost story that's over a century old. i like that

-i've noticed neil generally does the same synths across a whole album. it's especially more clear in the earlier ones, and does mean i occasionally mix up songs between clown circus & live from the haunted candle shop

-ah! ancient aliens! my least favorite track on this album. i cant even claim to have the least interest in a popular one i've just generally not liked this one much from the beginning. so im curious to see what neil's got to say, i think ive been in ~new commentary zone for a while now

-anyway. newest update on the loolin not realizing a song's funky time signature front: i think this one's in 6/4. or at least switches a lot between time signatures. granted i dont listen to it very often for the reasons stated above

-see the way neil describes it. eldritch horror upon being visited by the unknown at a time when humanity'd hadn't even yet had a chance to imagine such a thing occurring. should be right up my alley. but the sound itself & many of the lyrics simply turn me away.

-must i specify i don't dislike it? spirit phone is neil's best album it not being my favorite doesn't mean i think it's bad yadda yadda nobody should be surprised by this it's not like anyone in these fandoms reads my liveblogs <3

-granted i think this is. the first bit of spirit phone content i've made on my blog ever. so who knows things can change <3

-the transitions in spirit phone are much less view-monster transition tracks & more extended outros. view-monster's were a bit more intro than outro sure but they also seemed directed upon making a 2-way rather than 1-way bridge between tracks. or something like that

-.............soft fuzzy man is an incredible nickname for a cat. i'd steal that if i werent afraid of introducing my relatives to lemon demon

-jirls

-an underlying metaphor is good enough. the literal side of the lyrics are fun. nothing but agreement here neil my good man

-the transition into as your father i expressly forbid it from soft fuzzy man is the best one in this album

-buddy you ask if a musical idea has been used before odds are the answer is yes in this day & age the question is has it been used in the way you're using it. like sure this soul jazz record from the 60s that was sold out in kansas stores for a week used this bassline that youve found yourself copying. but seeing as youre using it in some angsty garage rock ballad type tune does anybody actually care

-doesn't everybody like to say things in an unhinged manner from time to time

-imagine having a guitar dad, i say, with my dad being a folk accordion/fiddle dad, which is infinitely worse in every way

-i think he was in an actual folk band at some point. idk the 90s were weird

-iron my life?

-m-more intimate? there are a lot of ways i'd describe this song but intimate isn't one of them. granted as your father is negatively intimate so from there i guess you've got nowhere to go but up

-...still glad to see his interpretation kinda supports my oc at least

-the way he says characters in songs shouldn't worry about death really strongly makes me think this is some sort of. thematic continuation of stuck from dinosaurchestra, even if there's no real death in there. interesting. would also mean that the dad from these past 2 songs is named carlos betty (no last name)

-i literally never assumed this was a flute solo. piccolo at best. it's pretty clearly a recorder

-my mom plays the recorder. i wonder if she can play recorder better than neil cicierega

-we can throw a party in honor of the crushing weight of responsibility! i simply won't be the one throwing it because i have enough on my plate already <3

-what the hell does "a sense of intent" mean

-i've never heard rush before however i disagree with neil's understanding of 6/4. 6/4 is meant to have emphasis (onbeat or another term i can't remember) on the 1st & 4th beat of every measure, which is greatly different from a measure of 4/4 then a measure of 2/4. it's why his 5/4 always sounds weird, because while it's recognizable in sequences of 10/4, it's more 2 measures of 4/4 with one of 2/4 tacked on the end. that's also how it's different from 3/4. i don't know much music theory but what i do understand i will fight to the death about

-"canonized" that's. a very interesting term to use when referring to a former president

-from now on i will interpret every love song directed at some unseen "you" to be inviting me to marry them for tax purposes. thanks neil for being an aromantic icon

-ah hell yes hell yes man-made object is my favorite goddam song on this album

-short & sweet & good damn vibes. neil's thoughts on it all are only making it better

-wild how he uses very few vocal effects for a song that he clearly is straining his vocal range for. go off neil

-the qualifier of man-made is a wonderful thing. oldest or biggest thing? oldest or biggest man-made thing? what a incredibly important specification. a world of possibilities lie between the two. oh i love it

-just gets me thinking yknow! what we consider weird/impressive in another species, in our own species- what kind of equivalent to that would there be from an outsider looking in? are there alien versions of the significances we place upon things, that we could never imagine? the limits of the human imagination mean we could never conceive of something else in the world that isn't, in some way great or small, just like us- and are we wrong for thinking that? such a juicy topic i wish there were a name for it because it's kinda hard to explain concisely

-spiral of ants. my second favorite song from this album, in fact. a good one to experience

-the vocals are just another instrument. they really truly are. i wasn't going into this commentary expecting to feel solidarity for neil cicierega in this chili's tonight on more than one occasion but here i am.

-like, his whole stance on interpreting songs is something i agree with almost entirely. you can take it at face value, you can dig to their very depths, you can listen to songs without caring what the lyrics mean whatsoever, and those are all fun. & yeah while any of these people can be annoying as one of the types who enjoys gliding on the surface more than anything i find those who dedicate themselves to figuring out the whole meaning of a song over anything else to be both slightly scary & slightly annoying <3 keep up the good work

-i want to make songs for my siblings the way neil makes songs for his sibling(s)

-spinch

-neil really shouldn't be allowed to be this funny like this whole album youre thinking golly! he's just a normal man this neil cicierega! and then he starts listing the cat hacks jokes & you remember he's had ridiculously consistent viral success with all his humorous endeavors and holy shit it's neil cicierega in action talking about his music. god bless you neil

-you're welcome, no problem, my pleasure. good eveternoon, radio audience!

#lemon demon #spirit phone #pretty sure this is my first bit of spirit phone content on my blog. hi greater lem dem fandom nice to see y'all. go listen to deporitaz #loolin liveblogs #i enjoyed this less for the content the commentary contained & more for the way i handled it. more pleasant than some times ive had #tis i #i havent listened to spirit phone in general in ages. i know why. so this was nice #to the world and back again

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apple-rose301 · 3 years

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T - Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending, about anything at all?

Hmm been doin’ some thinkin’ on this, friend, and i’ve decided on some headcanons i’ll absolutely fight anyone on in regards to HLVRAI:

Benrey just flat out doesn’t understand alot of human things, and experiences many of them for the first time with the Science Team. Emotions like genuine anger, sadness, love, and hope; experiences like amusement parks, arcades, water parks/beaches (hc that before the ResCas Benrey didn’t really go outside very much aside from his own home, since it feels like Tommy was really his only friend back then); anything that was alien to Benrey slowly becomes his nature as he starts feeling more and more human with them. That is, of course, only within readon when he manages to work things out with everyone, especially Gordos (what with the hand being cut off and all).

Bit on the Tomrey side since I quite like it and definitely need to draw it someday, Benrey and Tommy mutually pined for a time. Tommy was surprisingly the first to let go of his feelings, not wanting to lose the good friendship he already has with the eldritch being; Benrey, on the other hand, tried to cling onto those feelings since he’s never really had a legitimate crush on anyone else. Prior to the ResCas incident and once these feelings were realized respectively between the two, it was obvious within the workplace that they were dancing around each other and really, really prolonging the inevitability of them being a couple (in the eyes of a few ppl who worked with them, that is). The moment Tommy decides not to pursue his feelings, it got a bit easier to face Benrey and, though he’s quite smart and—in my opinion—more emotionally understanding, it’s a surprise he managed to go this long not detecting the obvious hints of his buddy’s attraction. During the first couple of events in HLVRAI, Benrey still quite likes Tommy—albeit more restrained about it, but overtime comes to pine for Gordos instead.

THAT’S ANOTHER HEADCANON IM SORRY I TYPE ALOT AND YOU OPENED UP A WHOLE ‘NOTHER LEVEL OF JACE RANTING— so! Last headcanon before I talk your ear off, Benrey and Gordos pining momence cuz i’m a fool; except Gordos pines first. When he meets this strange man asking for his passport, at first he’s annoyed and infuriated to his core, Benrey the same since this dumb man isn’t following passport protocol. Overtime though as they interact with each other more and more, Gordos is the one to have a heart-flipped turn around, and is both surprised and confused with himself because—it’s Benrey, how could he like Benrey? So this is all happening with his feelings all jumbled up, and Benrey’s even more confused with the guy since he’s acting weirder and weirder and quite honestly even more suspicious to him. In reality Gordos is just a mess and can’t form coherent thoughts one way or another abt the man that would just not leave him alone for even a second. Benrey, on the other hand, doesn’t properly realize his feelings until after the arm being cut off incident. Which makes all the matters worse considering 1) he got Gordos’ arm lopped off, 2) Gordos is doing his damnest to absolutely eviscerate whatever good feelings he had abt the guy, and 3) Benrey’s going to be the big boss at the end of all this. This leads to a frustrated alien to attempt to speedrun his feelings—throwing terribly-timed flirts and overall being an extra nuisance to Gordos, which only confuses and frustrates him even more. The rest of the Science Team is seeing this all happening and just don’t really know what to do with these idiots, Tommy especially considering my prior headcanon. The end of both the above headcanon and this one is Frenreylatta. They figure themselves out overtime and manage to confess to each other far off into the future (had to end it here, gettin’ FAR TOO LONG aha!).

Benrey listens to Avril Lavigne, solely thanks to me drawing Benrey when I listen to Sk8r Boy and Girlfriend. He bops so hard to these tunes specifically (and What the Hell).

That’s the few headcanons i’d like to share abt what i’d place my bets on, thanks for the ask eggy!! :D

#jman.txt #eggy-14 #hlvrai #tomrey #frenrey #frenreylatta #<- tagging for the headcanons #ask meme

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izukult · 3 years

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ok ok UMMM if it’s still open, i’d like a playlist? i listen to a lot of mother mother, mitski, vocaloid, hyperpop, still woozy, tame impala etc etc. generally i’ve been told that i’m a pretty chill person to be around? i’m a good person to go to if you just wanna be near somebody but aren’t that big on conversation, especially because i’m super super reserved and introverted. i play video game, i’m intj and an aquarius, and i’m a very logical thinker w a generally analytical mindset toward most things heehoo english literature and novel analysis essay momence ............ i’m also v v blunt, and awful at comforting people LMAODHSKFN i’m the mf to see someone cry and ask if they want a glass of water or a shoulder pat

kenna. kenma kozume 100% no doubt. i understand that on one spectrum, he works really well with out there people like shōyō and kuroo, but your personality also meshes with his REALLY well!! yall debate about games😐 like full out debate 😀

sometimes people think because the both of you are so quiet your relationship is awkward and forced but that’s definitely not true. please yall text so much😀😀 kenma is a little more out there over text. i kinda feel like he just doesn’t have the energy to be 😜🤰🥳 loud vibey. even if you’re not a super loud, direct couple you both know how you feel ab each other🥺🥺 yall also the kind of couple to listen to songs that are def meant to be sad and you’re like “ugh bae us😻”

ALSO LMAO HIS MUSIC TASTE AND YOUR MUSIC TASTE WOULD 100% GO TOGETHER JUST ABSOLUTE BRAINROT SO i’m going to link the playlist and list the songs incase u don’t have spotify i hope u like it

1. ringtone- 100 gecs

2. burning pile- mother mother

3. rhinestone eyes- gorillaz

4. let it happen- tame imapala

5. midnight city- m83

6. lotta true crime- penelope scott

7. dead girl in the pool.- girl in red

8. last words of a shooting star- mitski

9. obsessed with you- the orion experience

10. kill v. maim- grimes

11. sensitive- serena isioma

12. c u girl- steve lacy

13. habit- still woozy

14. morning sex- ralph castelli

15. freaking out the neighborhood- mac demarco

i don’t really feel like kenma would MAKE this playlist but i feel like he’d definitely be like yes this song and oh this song and oh this song yknow? like he built it and structured it he’s just too much of a lil bitch to actually make it

if you want an explanation for my reasoning for any of the songs message me! and if there are any songs you don’t like, tell me and i’ll change them for you!! tysm for participating <3

#haikyuu #haikyuu playlists #haikyuu x reader #kenma kozume #kenma x reader #kenma playlist #ikigaitooru playlists

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rhydium · 3 years

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Info dumbo about the StarFinite story?

aright u asked for it anon GET READY [cracks knuckles] this is gonna be long so obligatory cut in 3, 2........

...1!

so the uh, the au! the story!! w/e yall wanna call it! full disclaimer, i only began working on this whole thing a while ago, but it's totally taken over my fukn brain. like, we're talking big hyperfixation hrs. am i cringe for being this invested in my own content? yes? cool i do not Care >:3€

i should also throw it out there real quick that i am kin w/ infinite, n this is actually one of my two canons (both of which are my own aus lmfao wow). i didn't go into it expecting it to be but sfsfsgdfs here we are ig!! for that reason it's got extra importance to me n this definitely contributes to the euphoria i get from it!! it's a lil odd writing ur own canon,,? but i kinda just go w/ the flow!

the au n, the story that i will start Eventually, revolves around infinite n starline (obvi) n it's honestly just ... the tl;dr is big healing momence n, what's this? uh oh sisters !!! they are falling in love 😳😳😳

uhhhh so infinite is an android, made by eggman. that's like, the most notable canon divergence here! super important context to have. i've got a whole big theory on the possibility of sega originally intending infinite to be an artificial being (which i explored in the works for my Other canon too), stemming from not only the scene in forces wherein infinite comments on sonic's "data", but a line of dialogue from tails in one of the last stages of the game where he Literally Says "so this is where eggman built infinite". that ... i mean. that contrasts w/ episode shadow pretty hard don't it?? would explain why that dlc was so rushed, n the comic too. ANYWAY adsfsfs um that's a seperate ramblepost. yeah!!!

they are also agender n use they/them (primarily) as well as he/him!! so i'll be refering to them w/ those pronouns!

after the war, infinite is taken in by the resistance n, instead of being dismantled, they're basically given a chance to rehabilitate themselves. it's agreed that they won't be reprogrammed, as despite the potential risks, it feels wrong to do so; like a violation of their free will, individuality n thinking. if infinite is to be a good person, it's not gonna be bc other ppl recreated their entire personality, it's gonna be bc it's what they themselves truly want. robot ethics idk man!! u can't tell me that sonic n co wouldn't offer this to infinite if they offered it to metal in IDW,,,, i am Standing By This!!!

it's, yknow, a bit rocky, at first. infinite has to really fight the urge to return to eggman (something they already tried once, before the resistance found them; they were cast out). it's a struggle against what they were built to do, against giving into unhealthy familiarity over facing a, while healthier, unfamiliarity. new faces, a new life, turning their back on their mission n creator, it's like, a lot.

they work for/with the sonic crew, rebuilding the world they tore down as deemed fitting justice, being closely monitored for a bit as a natural precaution. as it becomes apparent infinite truly no longer has any ambition to harm others (they don't have much ambition for anything, really), they're then granted more freedom, n start taking on more important missions!! it at least gives them something to do, keeps them occupied. they have issues with dissociation, unreality, whether they're truly a real person bc, well, android. feeling purposeless, n a lack of worth, especially. a need to prove themselves. heavy stuff. i'll kinda go into that a bit more in a sec. their work grounds them, if only temporarily.

n soooooo... IDW comic stuff happens. metal virus time. starline gets kicked out of the empire.

now, as the comics are ongoing, n as this is already an au, there's gonna be divergence, n i must admit i haven't planned out all that yet. there's a lot i have to consider!! infinite being w the resistance/restoration is a big game changer ... tho i Do believe that they were absent, likely on a far out mission during most of the chaos. eggman doesn't know abt them, nor does starline or anyone else other than the sonic crew; n some civilians that recognise them.

i'm not 100% sure of Exactly when it happens, but i think it's just after bad guys, that infinite is sent to locate n bring in starline. it doesn't prove too difficult. there's a whole, starline realising "oh fuck it's you???", some bickering n, the two don't hit it off right away. they're both kinda like. not mentally stable ddgddgdds,,,

so uh. starline ends up essentially going thru the same sorta shit as infinite. careful watch, rebuilding, all that jazz, making sure he can be trusted. he's like... very very lost, quite like infinite is. the world has kinda calmed down, in the meanwhile.

it's at this point i'm gonna go ahead n drop a bit of a ramble i subjected my friends to a while ago, to articulate the way i see the two, n their dynamic together!! i was considering making this it's own post a while ago!

analysing their characters a bit... let's look at starline. Like. so we have this, in bad guys, which SENT ME tbfh;

i feel like it's the moment that triggers starline onto the path he is rn canonically,,, he's clearly like. rly mad n bitter. the core of this?? he wants his work n his efforts to be acknowledged.

he's big angry. still kind of in denial at this stage. he has himself obsessed w/ the idea of making eggman see him as Worthy, that if he just tries hard enough, that'll happen. he's dependent on eggman's validation, n i mean, it's no surprise; he's followed him a Long Time by the sounds of it.

then in the recent issue, hold the fuck up, bc we got, This;

god. my god it's all comin together now homies. this???? this right here??? it is the CLASSIC "i have to do this to prove i'm strong n powerful n smart n worthy n should be respected please Give Me Acknowledgement" ..... n who else is Like That? can u see where im going w/ this?

i think most ppl are aware of infinite's character being extremely indicative of self worth/esteem issues n the need to prove themself, right?? the extreme adversity, repulsion, perhaps even fear toward the idea of being weak. the compulsion to prove otherwise, to show their strength, to become powerful, to conquer to make a point. their theme exudes this same energy as their behaviour in-game; an aggressive attitude, trying to assert themself, while if u rly listen...? the lyrics are actually really sad in places. it reeks of cover up, although composition wise, a v interesting thing to note is a lot of the more telling lyrics are prominent while some of the affirming ones are in the background. indicative of a desire to have their true feelings be heard but caught in a vicious loop?

okay okay that's yet Another different analysis. AHEM.

not to get deep on main (oh who the hell am i kidding that's the point of this entire thing) but i think starline has issues w/ his worth in a similar way to infinite. they both seem to have this need to Prove something, whether it's to others or themselves, n get caught in a toxic spiral of doing worse n worse things for Some kind of validation or acknowledgement. they'll go to really big lengths chasing that, n both of them ultimately sought validation in the wrong place n wrong way.

this is a big part of my starfinite dynamic,, n so, what happens, as they get closer n open up??? we have them BOTH realising together that they don't have to do fuck all to prove anything to anyone. they don't need to do all this to show they're strong n smart n worth something, not to anyone else OR themselves. they're enough as they are. they bond over that shared feeling that they have to do xyz, to prove themselves, n that desire to just finally be acknowledged n appreciated n help each other thru it. to help each other understand that other ppls approval, or lack thereof, doesn't define them, their strength, intelligence, and worthiness.

i feel like they have an interesting parallel between them in like... the above could be taken as a general analysis, but to go more in depth on this au specifically?? ...

starline followed eggman for presumably a long time n it no doubt left him feeling a heavy and deep regret for all that time wasted n spent on an unhealthy path. infinite kinda teaches him that what matters is what he's doing Now n also reminds him that if none of it happened, starline wouldn't have learnt a lot of the serious skills he has. n while starline still feels bad, he also realises himself that, he likely never would have crossed infinite's path if none of it happened. for that reason, he wouldn't take it back.

infinite has only been recently made, on the other hand. they haven't really existed long, yet, but so far their experiences haven't been very positive n it can be .... discouraging. starline sorta, shows infinite their limited experiences w/ the world are a very tiny fraction of what's out there, n things can absolutely change, yes, including for the better; that's the essence of life, a neverending, constant flow of change.

it's a big tale of moving on n letting go, honestly; made easier as they're doing it together. n as they heal n grow, well... these bitches gay. sfshshdgds like, ig that's putting it p bluntly but!! they start to trust each other, understand each other more. as they get to truly know who the other is, they both start developing The Feelings. they're both pretty oblivious n the reveal is totally unknown so far!! yeah, i know, bummer. i suck. boo. adafsfsds however i can say there will be lots of content in the making!! if that soothes the soul! i've got of ideas i hope to bring to life.

ofc there's still a lot of more specific things i haven't covered here so! if y'all want more juice hmu w/ more focused questions but !! this is the overview n i hope it was a decent read now that gave some uhhh! Cool Insight! yea!!! ✌

#jackal.txt #android infinite au #i need a proper name for this #infinite the jackal #dr starline #starfinite #long post #idw sonic spoilers

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vampire-eros · 2 years

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i feel like public white view of womanhood is skewed a lot by misogyny and white supremacy and after i learned womanhood lives as a bundle of neurons in the brain here's my guess about what femininity is

femininity is when you are cool

but also masculinity is when you are warm

i understand masculinity more because i experience it, but i only experience pseudo-femininity and maybe only a little of true femininity

and lately while thinking about how you can have a woman brain

i was wondering about what that means

i felt like watching trans women let me think about what a girl might be like without misogyny put on her at a young age, which imo would reveal into what real womanhood means because one is more themselves when it's experienced willingly and happily

many girls and women are definitely very cute

i'm trying to think of girls that aren't just nerdy and cute cos i know that's not the only type of gal to exist

maybe femininity and masculinity is like lizard eggs and gender born in a cool area is femininity and gender born in a warm area is masculinity but if it's too hot it's "hot femininity" where it's more aggressive femininity?

i like gentle masculinity and i think it's the only masculinity (though idk that leaves out bastard brain momence which i feel like is tied to my masculinity sometimes)

the only femininity i can seem to think of is like... "cool and likes things a lot"

hng

i want to put the impossible into words so bad

do girls have bastard brain momence and try stupid things for fun and curiosity?

how do they do it

i only know like 2 girls and one of them may be the best friend i've ever had but that's still one girl all my other friends are guys and other nonby people

and i can't deep-internalized-transphobia my way out of this one because now i know where and how gender lives so i can't be like "well technically" anymore because gender identity lives firmly in physical biology

#what is gender

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inactivenotinuseetc · 3 years

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what are your fav yakuza games ranked??!

so i’ve only played 0-4 (and half of 5) and seen mooost of 7 (i don’t have it, but my friend has been playing it and streaming it to me), so i guess i don’t really have a rating on 5 or 6 but tl:dr: 0, k2/5 so far, and 4/k1/3 are kind of on the same level for me though 4 might be higher only because saejima ... but elaboration below because (: we live in my world (definite spoilers)

0 - my absolute favorite so far, and, like, as much fun as i have in the other games, nothing comes close. i went into it relatively, if not totally, blind and so that made it MUCH more enjoyable. i like the darker tone too and i am like... so biased towards everyone in this game i immediately love them more than anyone else (except nishitani. hate that bitch. whatever). two of my big favorites are from this game alone (kiryu and majima, and like yeah they’re in other games but their characterizations here... well... i’m in love. also hi the other one is saejima you didn’t ask but you shall receive). i’m really happy i played it before k1 because i think i kind of would’ve fucking hated nishiki and majima (also, hi, i really really love nishiki in this game and i was like, trying to look up a ref for him while playing and saw that he died and WELL. turns out that’s just k1).

it just hits so hard. all of it. it made me scared makoto was just going to not even make it to the end. tachibana’s death was so ): ))))::::. both the car scene and the end of shibusawa’s fight with nishiki and kiryu are stellar. i love majima’s absolute catharsis moment at the end up until the epilogue (also i just.. in general love cathartic moments for characters. sexy.). i went from being like wow oda is kind of fucking scum to wait this guy is kind of chill to oh my god what. it was just a really fun experience to not know what was going to happen or who was going to make it or not.

doing side content now, all the hostesses are my besties now. we’re all friends. i love love yuki and ai. also i’m like. so good at disco. not really but kind of. disco should be in more games.

k2 - okay so this is mainly so high because i find it so fucking pretty. i’m in love with the way it looks. i love being able to walk in places with no loading screen. sotenbori is so gorgeous and so is kamurocho. it’s so... <3

kiryu and sayama’s romance was like laughable and the fact that the end was that was ... so fucking funny to me. i don’t really care about sayama at all at all but the end with her and ryuji was sweet to me (and made me like him a bit since a lot of the time i just... don’t have opinions on characters). i really like daigo in this too. the majima saga was fun to me because i’m weak willed and well... i really love love makoto.

5 - i haven’t finished it but i find it really really fun. every part has been super fun to me and i’m on haruka’s right now. i know a bit about it which is... unfortunate (um. like probably anything regarding majima. as in he definitely isn’t dead if he’s in the next two and also, like, stuff with park)... i have many many thoughts and emotions about saejima between this and 4. park was also growing on me a lot but then um well. it seems she died so um. well that happened. i’m excited to see where it goes! all of the jobs have been pretty fun (hunting has been my least favorite so far because it kind of felt tedious and i keep getting attacked by bears, i finished off taxi while in the story, and i like. have to stop myself from doing all of haruka’s stuff because i totally love it, it’s my favorite. honestly kind of scared of shinada’s because i um. .. don’t know how good i’m going to be at it since i think it’s baseball). it’s just pretty good!

4 - i wasn’t super invested in it. i loved saejima’s part and he really quickly became my favorite but my god, some of the stuff regarding him was fucking stupid. the rubber bullets? kinda stupid. yasuko dying for like... no reason... kinda stupid (mainly because i just.. i want ONE happy sibling reunion after ryuji/sayama and tachibana/makoto). akiyama and hana are fun, tanimura was nice and i still don’t know what the hell happened to him but bye i guess since he just seems to have vanished off the face of the earth. i can’t really remember anything kiryu did and i think he was just kind of a weaker protag, he’s much better again in 5. um... basically though... saejima... i like seeing a more genuine majima too again.

3 - i guess i wasn’t super invested in this either. some of the stuff was cute (like kiryu dad moments) but i just... didn’t really care... at all... about anything going on... the kazama look alike thing was like, um, ok. couldn’t really care about kashiwagi dying because i’m like,,, girl i know you’re in 7 (also i really like him in 7 he’s funny). majima kiryu bestie moments. i like all the kids except the certain riona part was so fucking uncomfortable (also idk why kiryu is telling them they’re all families and saying he saw everyone at sunflower as siblings then trying to put riona and mitsuo together. also weird). kind of don’t understand the mine hype because like he looks and sounds nice but ladies.. he bulldozed a fucking orphanage. how more typically evil can you get than that. literally hates orphans. it’s so... and i just didn’t really super care? he was interesting at the end i’ll give him that but then he just suicides so like... bye. also richardson’s voice is really funny to me.

k1 - so i played this immediately after 0 and well... having really liked nishiki and majima in 0 made this .. um . it was almost comedically similar with the same boat fight and the same car chase, but, just, lame. it was kinda eh. i didn’t like it. i kind of feel like nishiki could’ve been done way better. majima is just suddenly.,.. he’s um doing things alright. it was just a biiiiiiiiiiiiig let down compared to 0. makes me bitter.

also i realize i didn’t rank 7 at all, but, um, kinda don’t understand what’s going on, and i’m REALLLY not invested. kiryu’s existence makes me livid. so fucking stupid. saejima and majima’s fight was fun because i like saejima just swinging majima around that is a fun concept also brother Momence which i <33 love seeing them together same in 4 and the start of his part in 5. all the party members are fun for the most part except nanba got really annoying. i didn’t see some of ch 3/4 either so. i don’t really have anywhere i’d place it. also i haven’t seen the end because my friend is just playing k1 instead SO ... forever in chapter 15 purgatory.

#📬#Anonymous #i wish i could see the other games blind because its kind of disappointing to know things #im stupid and keep going on youtube and well . youtube is like fuck you here's massive spoilers.

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