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laxmiree · 6 months

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[CN] MLQC Lucien’s 2023 Birthday Story translation

⚠️ SPOILER ALERT!! ⚠️

This post contains a detailed spoiler for a story that has not been released in EN yet! Feel free to notify me if there are any mistakes in the translation~

Lucien's 2023 CN Birthday Event (The New World)✧ Birthday Story (You’re here!) | Birthday Prologue | Birthday Date | ASMR | Birthday Party

As Lucien looked at two familiar faces in one of the photographs, his gaze flickered for a moment.

It was as if a strange emotion had crossed through time, enveloped in the fresh warmth and memories, unfolded before his eyes once again.

"...And I remember these two Chinese scholars, they were outstanding scientists. It's just a pity…"

As Lucien glanced back at that photograph, he had a fleeting sense that the people in the picture were also gazing back at him.

Perhaps they had been watching over him all along.

[T/N: It's very important to read [Until Dawn R&S] and [Exclusive Past - Monochrome Scenery] first, in that order, because they provide background information regarding his life during college. I promise it'll be worth it to see how everything regarding his college life ended up tied together in this story :). Reading these three feels like accompanying him from getting into college and now graduating and getting a doctoral degree sob sob]

[Chapter 1 - Self-Planning of a Genius]

The cold light from the computer screen reflected into Lucien's eyes. He didn't stop even for a moment as he continuously typing on the keyboard. He only breathed a sigh of relief after typing the last letter and then glanced at the lower right corner of the screen.

July 25th, 4:23.

The entire content of the graduation thesis was completed almost a week ahead of the planned deadline.

That's good, he thought, stretching lazily and getting up to pour himself a cup of coffee. The steaming hot liquid and the rich aroma of roasted beans further stimulated his already alert mind.

Although there is still more than half a year left until the formal thesis defense date, sufficient preparation is required for both scheduling and other arrangements.

Outside the window, a hint of dawn began to appear. Lucien finished his last sip of coffee, poured another cup, and then sat back at the table. He retrieved various experimental notes, brought up data analysis charts and reference documents, and brought his thesis back to the first page-

"Further findings on the contributions of the parietal lobe in episodic memory"

His face showed no expression as his slender fingertips glided over the mouse and began the inspection.

Since joining this laboratory four years ago, he spent a year getting to know and familiarize himself with it. Apart from his studies, applying for an independent research space within the organization and obtaining certain privileges and data was also a part of achieving his goals. Lucien always stayed on the clear path, just as he had mentioned during the interview with Dr. Lawson years ago: to research his interests within a limited time frame.

Playtime can be enjoyable, but what's truly important is what needs to be done.

So, about three years ago, he proposed the idea of shortening the duration of his master's and doctoral studies to the professor.

"I need a valid reason."

Dr. Lawson lifted his head from the report, his silver-white eyebrows arching slightly.

"I believe that my current research topic and project are sufficient for me to graduate in three years, at most four."

His calm tone carried the determination of a young man set on his goal. The professor remained silent as if weighing something, and after a moment, he set aside the report in his hand.

"They say there are some interesting stalls at the nearby market. Would you like to go check them out together?"

This invitation seemed to leave no room for refusal. By the time they walked from one end of the market to the other, both of them had their hands full with several paper bags.

"You seem to have a particular fondness for this flavor of wine."

"The family has been passing down their winemaking skills for three generations now, and the current owner is someone I watched grow up." The professor smiled and shared stories of his childhood days picking grapes on the estate with his grandparents in a good mood.

Lucien didn't quite know how to respond to the professor with such a rich life experience, so he simply listened quietly until the conversation naturally shifted back to his own experiences, from his student days to his journey to this point.

"Lucien, I respect your choices and judgment."

"School knowledge is limited; even the most solid theories need practical validation. No one can stop you from climbing higher. After all, everyone has their own path to follow."

"Moreover, silly kid, you just want to see a wider world, don't you?"

The setting sun cast a faint golden glow on the old man's hair as he gave a few more instructions. Before leaving, he placed the paper bag containing the wine into Lucien's hands.

"Those kids are good at picking gifts, and this old man can't compete, so I'll do it first. I want to wish you an early congratulations on your successful graduation."

In the end, Lucien never fully understood how a trip to the market ended up with the professor accepting his proposal.

But fortunately, the outcome was favorable.

He knew exactly what he wanted. Rather than being unwilling to pause his hurried footsteps, it was more about his greed, his eagerness to step into that world and obtain the answers he desired sooner.

Unconsciously, the coffee cup on the table was empty once again.

Lucien's gaze returned to the last word of the document, only to realize that the sun had already climbed overhead. The warm sunlight amplified his hunger, making him realize it was time to replenish some necessary carbohydrates and sugar.

Four years had passed, and surprisingly, nutritionists still hadn't invented nutritional packages.

He couldn't help but sigh.

[Chapter 2 - Habits and Change]

A week later, the routine report email unexpectedly received a reply.

"At 3:00 PM, Charles River."

Lucien's gaze paused for a moment. In the past two years, Black Swan had rarely initiated face-to-face meetings. Of course, they would only visit the independent laboratory unannounced, pretending chance encounters in bustling places or infiltrating parties with those "eyes" that couldn't quite disguise themselves.

He didn't mention it. After all, there was no need to waste time dealing with these annoying issues.

He glanced at the time and stood up. "I've drafted the analysis report, and we can further validate it when the key data is available. I'll head out for now."

In response, two consecutive gasps were followed by Colt's high-pitched exclamation. "It's only 2:08 in the afternoon! 2:08! The laboratory ghost is actually leaving the lab at a time when the data is still running?!" He exaggeratedly covered his head. "What catastrophe has occurred? Is the world about to end?!"

Lucien shook his head helplessly. Even though this senior had graduated a long time ago, dealing with his occasional exaggerated and noisy behavior was always a challenge. But when he thought about having only about half a year left of their time together, he smiled softly.

"You're still in the lab. If there's really an emergency, you can always handle it."

He walked over to Matthew, a junior who had joined the lab less than six months ago, and gave him some instructions about certain data points to observe closely. Then, amidst the noise, he left the lab.

The weather today was exceptionally nice. Sitting on a park bench and observing people wasn't a bad way to spend time. Lucien leisurely walked down the stone steps, strolling by the riverbank. In the distance, a man in a black suit was already waiting there.

He casually put his hands in his pockets and gazed at the river, but it seemed like his focus was elsewhere.

This was someone he hadn't seen before.

Perhaps hearing the footsteps, the man turned around.

"The organization is very satisfied with your recent data results, and you can move on to the next stage."

"If there are any equipment or manpower needs, the organization will provide support. However, efforts always require a return."

"I believe the results of the experiments I've been given over the years are enough proof of that."

The implications in the other person's words were quite obvious. Lucien was well aware that the so-called "eyes" extended far beyond those he was aware of. He didn't resent being monitored; in fact, he hoped they would expend effort to "observe" him. He wanted them to see what he was capable of. This was his leverage, a necessary condition for him to maintain control over his path.

Since both parties were intelligent individuals, working together to achieve their goals was the best outcome.

"Regarding the research on Evol, the organization is preparing to enter a new phase. Several key subjects are currently in the investigation stage, one after another, and I believe we will soon identify the most crucial person." The man handed over a stack of documents. "So, you also need to step onto a new stage as soon as possible." The emphasized words carried an invisible sense of urgency, inadvertently causing Lucien to furrow his brow. However, he accepted the documents and began to read them without changing his expression.

"These are documents from a research institute in the United States. You will need to attend an interview there in five months, so graduate as soon as possible. And part of the process is that the organization will help expedite the issuance of your diploma."

"I will apply for a batch of new equipment soon. Additionally, my current research personnel are overly saturated, so I will make some adjustments on my own."

Lucien concealed the fact that he had already completed his thesis progress and instead presented his own requirements.

Following the arrangements step by step doesn't necessarily mean compromise; it could also be a temporary period of lying low.

After the conversation, Lucien originally intended to return to the dormitory, but his feet led him to the laboratory instead.

"Oh my god! Xiū mó, you're back! That's great. The world isn't going to end!"

Lucien smiled unconsciously as he put on his lab coat again and returned to his seat.

Parting always seems to slip easily into the queue of life, and it looks like playtime is about to come to an end.

[Chapter 3 - Pineapple Pie Flavor]

"The university has approved the early graduation process, and the defense is scheduled for next Monday."

"Sorry to trouble you."

After the conversation by the river that day, Lucien approached Dr. Lawson and expressed his desire to graduate early. The meticulous old gentleman naturally showed concern but didn't seem too surprised. Perhaps the professor had already grown accustomed to his hurried behavior to some extent.

However, the process was much more complicated than he had imagined. After the professor consulted with the university, several rounds of document submission and supplementary explanations followed, causing delays of more than a month before everything was finally settled.

Lucien was patient in dealing with this, and it just showed how important the title of "Young Outstanding Scientist" was to that group of people. It made them reluctant to rush through the process, even if they were eager. And for him, this was undoubtedly a good thing.

On the other hand, it seemed good to be able to enjoy the last days as a student in peace.

Outstanding professors always knew when to provide all the help he needed at the right time, and similar individuals allowed him to immerse himself in his subsequent research steps. Countless unique ways of thinking collided here, giving birth to new fireworks of ideas.

This ideal yet real scientific world has become a crucial cornerstone for him to step into the next world.

Lucien knows that he likes it here.

"Lucien, where are you going?" The professor removed his glasses after reading the paper's last page.

"Probably to the end of the puzzle."

He almost blurted it out as if this answer had existed in his heart for a long time.

However, Lucien was well aware that reaching that place would require a lot of preparation, abilities, knowledge, challenges, or perhaps... darkness itself. This made him curious and filled him with anticipation. He wanted to know what kind of results that mysterious substance would bring to humanity or to this world. He was also curious about where he would ultimately arrive.

"It sounds like a distant journey,"

"Take care."

The familiar words felt like both a piece of advice and a simple blessing.

Perhaps it was the atmosphere of parting that made Lucien not refuse the doctor's invitation, and he ended up having a meal together with him at home.

Lucien had never formally visited his home before, and their interactions were mostly limited to academic occasions. So, after accepting the invitation, he immediately returned to his dormitory and retrieved two boxes of white tea.

"Oh, Chinese tea. It might pair well with my pineapple pie,"

The lady appeared particularly delighted, her curly hair bouncing as she enthusiastically brewed a pot of tea to replace the originally planned wine, then turned towards the oven.

"You don't need to go to so much trouble."

"With a rare visit from a student, of course, we must treat you with our specialties. Don't be shy. Take a seat."

Lucien no longer refused the warmth extended to him, and while waiting for dinner, he sat with the doctor in the living room. The room was cozy, with leather sofas and a patterned carpet. On one side, there was an elegant display of artwork and a vase of flowers; on the other, there were several framed photographs. The frames were well-maintained, showing that they were cherished keepsakes.

As Lucien looked at two familiar faces in one of the photographs, his gaze flickered momentarily.

It was as if a strange emotion had crossed through time, enveloped in the fresh warmth and memories, unfolded before his eyes once again.

"This was taken many years ago... I believe it was after some scientific conference."

"Back then, scientists from various fields around the world gathered in Copenhagen for a month-long academic discussion." Noticing Lucien's paused gaze, the doctor got up and brought the photo over.

"I had read about that conference as part of my research, but I didn't realize you knew Professor Ding Yunqing and Professor Hoffman. I recall they were experts in the field of linguistic philosophy," Lucien mentioned.

"Science connects not only truths but also everyone who walks this path," the doctor said, his gaze lingering on the old photograph as if he had opened a box of memories. For a brief moment, his eyes dimmed.

"...And I remember these two Chinese scholars, they were outstanding scientists. It's just a pity…"

"But their academic and research contributions were unquestionable, and those dedicated hours still serve as our foundation, helping countless others open the doors to truth in the future."

Lucien fell silent, unable to quite express the emotions stirring in his chest at this moment.

Am I one step closer to you now?

“It’s dinner time~”

The doctor's wife had prepared a table full of dishes, illuminated by flickering candlelight, making it a truly lavish spread. As Lucien glanced back at that photograph, he had a fleeting sense that the people in the picture were also gazing back at him.

Perhaps they had been watching over him all along.

He slowly took a bite of the warm pineapple pie.

It was very warm and sweet.

[Chapter 4 - Gifts from everyone]

After hearing the news that Lucien would graduate early, the entire laboratory was in an uproar.

"Damn genius kid, you came to the lab later than me, but you're graduating earlier! This is unfair!"

"Come on, Elliot, maybe you should look at your own issues. Is your research just too mediocre, with only eight papers and an E?"

"...Mediocre? Is that really mediocre?" Matthew, who was standing nearby, widened his eyes.

"No need to dwell on what they're saying too much," Lucien lowered his voice, treating it as passing on some advice to the younger ones. "Let's finish the data comparison at hand first, and if we happen to bring the doctor over... Colt, you might actually get kicked out of the lab."

Colt let out a final wail and obediently entered silent work mode.

The sounds of equipment in operation, the constant clicking of keyboards, hushed discussions, and occasional sighs during experiments – Lucien suddenly realized that today felt just like any other day, and the parting still felt distant.

However, time had long set its course and was accelerating forward.

Another ordinary day in the lab came to an end. Colt, who was usually enthusiastic about parties, didn't disappear this time but stayed behind to clean up and even occasionally pulled Elliott and Matthew aside for what seemed like secret plotting. Lucien neatly organized the cleaned beakers and test tubes, acting as if nothing was amiss. After finishing, he followed them back to the dormitory as if everything was normal.

"Ta da—this is our graduation gift for you!"

On the coffee table were four beautifully wrapped gifts, three of which were almost discernible by their shape, likely books. Under the gaze of three pairs of eyes, Lucien cooperatively tore open the wrapping paper.

《The Complete Plays of George Bernard Shaw (1893-1921)》,《Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Text Revision DSM-5-TR》， and《Principles of Neural Science》. There were also a few beautifully handmade bookmarks and a stack of postcards featuring the natural landscapes of various American states.

"I know you have the basic textbooks, but receiving the 'Neuroscience Bible' from your senior, the significance is different, right, Xiù Mó… Oops, I mean, Xǔ... Xǔ mò! Did I get the pronunciation right this time?"

"Colt mentioned giving books, and I thought long and hard before selecting a useful reference book. Even though most people may not actually use it in reality, if there comes a moment when you need some assistance, I hope it can come in handy."

"The novel was chosen by Caroline. Her experiments in Canada have been quite demanding lately, so I'm representing her."

"The bookmarks and postcards were my contribution... I hope they are quite practical!"

Listening to them chatter and introduce their gifts, Lucien suddenly felt that the things in his hands were heavy, as if he was holding more than just the gift itself.

"Thank you. I'll take good care of these and bring them back home." He finally expressed his gratitude simply, taking the gifts back to his room and storing them carefully.

At that moment, there was a knock on the door.

"Xǔ Mò, can I come in?"

"Of course," Lucien turned to look at Colt. "You finally got my name right."

"In fact, once you grasp the pronunciation rules, it's not that difficult," Colt smugly raised an eyebrow. "If there's anything unfinished or you need help with anything, just speak up. Proofreading work is also fine."

"I'll keep that in mind if I need any help."

"So, Xǔ Mò, what do you plan to do in the future?"

He wasn’t sure if it was the sense of achievement from suddenly mastering the pronunciation after four years, but Colt seemed to add his name to every sentence. It was a bit amusing, but Lucien still thought carefully about the question.

"I might consider establishing my own research institute."

"Oh, that sounds great. I always feel like if I stay in this lab any longer, the doctor will kick me out sooner or later."

"Well, that's also his expectation of you."

Colt pursed his lips and suddenly remembered something. He took out a pair of NOU cards from his pocket and placed them on Lucien's desk.

"Take them. You might need them in the new place."

"So, is NOU really a traditional pastime here?" Lucien finally asked the question that had been bothering him as he looked at the cards.

"Hahaha, do you like it then?"

Lucien didn't answer the question, just as Colt hadn't addressed his curiosity.

But at this moment, he confirmed that perhaps only with this group of people in front of him would he have that special feeling to play NOU cards with them.

"Oh... Sad," Colt put on a mournful expression, and Lucien knew he was about to start something again.

"Let's play one last round!"

"I'll be here tomorrow. To be precise, I have a few more months."

"Then let's play every day from now until the day you leave!"

"...."

"Elliot! Matthew! Let's party!"

[Chapter 5 - Parting and Full Moon]

The thesis defense ended smoothly.

Today, everyone was assigned to attend an academic conference, and the usually bustling dormitory felt a bit empty. Lucien thought for a moment and began to organize his belongings.

Having lived here for four years, Lucien had developed a habit of keeping things organized. However, there were still numerous miscellaneous items. Of course, books took up a significant portion of his belongings, and the rest included various notes, materials, and reports. He grabbed a few packing boxes and began sorting everything by category. As for some discarded items, he decided to arrange them for disposal.

Soon, half of the room was emptied out.

It turned out that four years' worth of time could fit into just a few boxes.

Suddenly, Lucien was drawn to a black strap that had fallen into a corner. He moved aside the piled-up items in the corner and discovered an old handheld video camera. The strap's connector showed obvious wear, and some labels on the adjustment buttons had rubbed off.

Lucien quickly recalled that it was two years ago, on a winter day, when the doctor had taken their entire lab to visit another school's lab for academic exchange. It seemed to be Christmas that day, with snow falling, and there was a large Christmas tree on Beacon Street adorned with colorful lights. Everyone had a bit of wine and enthusiastically joined in the street's celebration activities, while he himself wandered into a second-hand Western antique shop. There was an array of tableware, dolls, furniture... His gaze went past them and landed on the camera at the edge of the shelf.

It seemed like... he had seen a similar one in that study room once.

In reality, Lucien didn't remember the model, and he couldn't be certain if it was truly the same one. Nevertheless, he bought it, perhaps just because of some familiarity.

Although he occasionally shot some aimless footage after returning, research reports and books gradually replaced it, and he slowly forgot about it.

The magic of memory lies precisely in this, the ability to bring past moments vividly back to life in an unassuming moment.

Lucien removed the battery from the camera and started charging it. As he continued to pack the boxes, he patiently waited for the red light to turn green.

After pressing the power button, he waited for a while before the machine displayed the startup screen slowly. He clicked the record button, and the somewhat empty dorm room appeared on the screen. After rotating the camera, he pushed open the door and walked out. The common lounge area was unusually quiet in the late hours, a bit messy as always.

The camera's lens passed through the corridor and exited the dormitory building. Even at night, occasional students were rushing by on campus. He walked along the usual path, passing by every tree he had passed on normal days, every building, his classroom, and the laboratory.

He sat in his seat, not turning on the lights, just sitting in silence for a long time. The camera passed by the lab bench, the whiteboard, and finally stopped at the window. Through this window, he had witnessed the changing seasons and countless day and night transitions, from sunrise to sunset. And all these ever-moving things had also witnessed him step by step toward distant places, coming here, and then leaving.

The old-fashioned camera had a lot of noise in the night, and although Lucien tried to adjust it, most of the footage was just a dark, ink-like expanse. However, he didn't care.

In the end, he lifted the camera upward, and the moon became increasingly round and full. Today happened to be the Cold Dew* in the lunar calendar.

Lucien exhaled; winter was approaching.

[T/N: "Cold Dew" (寒露) is one of the 24 solar terms in the traditional Chinese calendar. It typically falls between October 8th and 23rd of the Gregorian calendar. During Cold Dew, the weather becomes significantly colder, and dew starts to form on the ground as temperatures drop further. It marks the transition from late autumn to early winter in the Northern Hemisphere. Just like it marks his parting from leisure college day to the upcoming 'winter' :"]

[Chapter 6 - Graduation]

Time moved forward once again, and Lucien received his graduation certificate in the office, handed to him by Dr. Lawson.

All those nearly four years of time, the thousands of days and nights spent in the lab, were now encompassed in this thin piece of paper. An unnamed emotion brushed through his heart, but he didn't dwell on it. Instead, he casually thought that B.S. was indeed very efficient.

"I heard you're preparing for interviews at American research institutes."

Dr. Lawson's voice sounded, and Lucien looked into those slightly sunken eyes, thinking to himself. By all accounts, the doctor shouldn't be aware of this matter, unless someone deliberately leaked the information.

"I do have that plan."

The light outside the window was exceptionally bright, reflecting the anticipation in Dr. Lawson's eyes.

"Lucien, I know you're eager to explore the truth and long for the answers this world has to offer you."

"At this point, your persistence surpasses that of many people. Sometimes, the power of the human heart is more like an unwavering truth than science. Don't let persistence turn into paranoia."

"I wish you all the best in everything that lies ahead."

Faced with such high expectations and blessings, Lucien slightly bowed.

"Thank you for your guidance over these four years."

After leaving the office, he walked along the corridor, and memories of his first time here involuntarily surfaced in his mind. It seemed that even the faint speckles on the wall corners were vividly remembered by him.

It's just that today is unusually quiet, or perhaps he should say, this day is too quiet.

There were no external tasks or lab arrangements today, but Colt and the others haven't been seen since morning. Lucien could probably guess what they might be up to, but he didn't dwell on it. Right now, he should return to his dorm for the final preparations. As he passed by a classroom, he heard a faint rustling sound from inside, which grew faster and denser, bursting out of the front door of the classroom with surprise and enthusiasm—

"Boom!"

Before Lucien's eyes, countless gray ribbons suddenly soared into the air, glistening in the sunlight and constantly shining.

"Xǔ Mò, congratulations on your graduation!"

"As expected of our little genius, congratulations on your official graduation!"

—Colt and Matthew waved small confetti cannons in their hands, while Elliot held a camera, and the three of them smiled with pride.

"Congratulations." Caroline, who had appeared at some point, placed a simple bouquet of flowers in Lucien's hand and patted his shoulder happily.

"Hey, Elliot, it looks like our surprise plan worked. This kid actually showed a rare surprised expression!"

"Quick, capture it! When this genius makes a name for himself in the future, this moment will be a precious memory."

They chatted away, and the simple pieces of information were unusually hard for Lucien's brain to process until Colt came over with a set of doctoral robes, and he blinked slowly.

"We heard from the Doctor that you'll be leaving the school soon, so the few of us decided to organize a separate graduation ceremony just for you."

Without giving Lucien a chance to refuse, the group had already divided the tasks and helped him into the doctoral robes. They gently pushed his back, leading him outside the teaching building.

Lucien looked up at the bright sunlight, feeling the warmth of the autumn day very clearly.

"I've been looking for all of you for half a day; it's not time for the group photo yet, is it?"

"Well, before we can proceed, we have to wait for you to arrive, Doc."

Watching Doctor's hurried figure join the others, Lucien unconsciously curled his lips into a smile.

There have been quite a few changes in these four years.

In this autumn, he was surrounded by this group of people, celebrating his graduation.

The pure beauty of the world can make people dull, and the world that awaits him was bound to be no longer a game.

But at least at this moment, he could slow down his pace just a bit.

He had graduated, and will be stepping into the no longer gentle nights ahead.

And he was full of anticipation for it.

#his writers are good at write bittersweet thing hhhhh #him unconcciously searching for his parents' traces always got me like #and icb i get really attached to his small lab teams sob sob #mlqc lucien #mr love queen's choice #mlqc cn #mlqc spoiler #mlqc #mlqc translation #mr. love queen's choice #mr love lucien #mlqc xu mo #mlqc spoilers

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3pirouette · 9 months

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Fic: The Infinity Leap (1/1)

Title: The Infinity Leap

By: TriplePirouette/3Pirouette

Spoilers: Through Endgame, Basic Quantum Leap Orginal Series knowledge required.

Disclaimer: They're not mine.

Word Count:

Distribution: AO3 Anyone else please ask first :)

Story Summary: Dr. Sam Beckett leaps into Agent Peggy Carter to write a wrong, but in the end, he may just end up righting two of them.

Story A/N: This story assumes 3 things: 1. Season 2 of Agent Carter never happened 2. The MCU up though Endgame is otherwise intact and 3. The reader has basic knowledge of Quantum Leap. Quite Frankly, this is really more of a Quantum Leap episode than anything, so I know there’s gonna be like… 5 people interested? But for those of you interested, I hope you really, really enjoy this.

Also, I know I’ve mentioned this before, but I’m a subscriber to the Outlander/Doctor Who version of time travel that makes the events of Infinity War possible in the Main MCU timeline. Seems Quantum Leap rules also fit into that.

This story is set in 2000, about 5 years after the last “leap” we see in the series, and assumes they get to continue the Quantum Leap program for several years.

I had hoped to really get this to a full length story, but it’s been sitting on my hard drive for a LONG time. In the end, I’m pretty happy with it, even if it isn’t exactly what I set out to write.

For Steggy Week 2023, Day 3: AU’s and Crossovers @steggyfanevents

~*~

Peggy Carter blinked.

Before she’d blinked, she’d been in the conference room, sipping the dregs of the morning coffee as Thompson addressed the room with his usual narcissistic flare.

After she blinked, she was in a white room she’d never seen before, in a white unitard she’d never worn before, and she didn’t feel a thing.

~*~

Sam took a slow breath as the tingling dissipated and did his best to keep a neutral facial expression. He kept his eyes on the man talking, hoping to feign interest. It was always hard stepping into a person when there was something happening, when people expected him to be able to contribute.

He slowly brought his hands under the table and down his stomach: a suit jacket. That seemed to track for the way the rest of the room was dressed, but he felt that funny feeling where his chest was too tight and his neck wasn’t constricted enough. A little lower with his hands and he confirmed what he’d been afraid of: a skirt. He was a woman. Again.

He wiggled his toes and rolled his ankles; at least the heels were sensible. Was he the secretary? He hated being someone’s secretary.

“So that’s it,” the man at the front said sharply, turning to hook his thumbs in his suspenders. “Any questions?”

Sam stayed quiet, hoping to get through the meeting without having to say a word. He looked down at the folder in front of him and immediately tossed the idea of “secretary” out the door. Secretaries didn’t usually have folders marked “eyes only” and “top secret.”

“Even you, Carter?” The man looked directly at Sam, and he looked up, locking gazes. “No thoughts or suggestions?”

Sam knew that tone, recognized it for the goad that it was and wished he could fire back. He almost did, as the man seemed to expect something from him, but he didn’t know what was going on, and didn’t want to change anything before he knew what he was really here to change. “No. Not right now,” he replied, shooting what he hoped was just enough of a smile laced with just enough sarcasm that the man would believe it.

“Yeah, fine. Right.” He turned back to the rest of the men around the table, seemingly upset he wasn’t going to get to spar with him. “You have your assignments.” He waved his hand and everyone stood to leave.

Sam did the same, gathering the papers and coffee in front of him, standing slowly to get used to the feeling of the heels on his feet.

A man with a crutch stopped next to him, whispering even though they were the only people left in the room. “I thought you were ready to give him hell about that plan?”

Sam shrugged, juggling the folder for a second. “Well, I decided it wasn’t the right time.”

The man sighed, stepping forward and through the door. “One of these days he’s going to listen to you, Peggy.”

Sam nodded, slowly following him out to the bullpen of desks. Peggy. Peggy… Carter. He scanned the nameplates and found a Margaret Carter in the back and made his way to the desk. The one thing that was on his side was that everyone seemed engrossed in their own work. Sam sat at the desk and kicked the heels off underneath, wiggling his toes as he looked at the clean desktop. He pulled open drawers and sifted through the papers there, finding little to go on.

He heard the woosh of the imaging room door open behind him and picked out a pad and pulled a pen to his fingers as Al’s voice drifted over him in the noisy room. “Let me tell you, Sam, this is going to be a tough one, that lady in there- she isn’t spilling a thing! We had a hell of a time finding you, and even then, it was a wing and a prayer. Ziggy’s been malfunctioning ever since you leaped, insisting you’re in the 40’s.” He spun, frustrated. “We don’t even have a name.” Sam smiled to himself and tapped the nameplate on the front of the desk, just like he was thinking.

Al moved around in front of him, meandering to look at the name plate. “Margaret Carter…” He huffed, typing it into his handlink. “Well, that’s more than we’ve gotten all morning.” Al leaned back, looking Sam over. “Wow, Sam, you’re…”

Sam looked up, annoyance on his face, but he said nothing.

Al let his hands wave in the air for a moment and sighed. “Yeah, you’re a ‘she’ for sure.” He snapped his mouth closed, for the first time realizing where they were. He looked over the clothes, the decorations on the walls, the telephone on the desk. “This looks a little…” He stepped over to the desk across from Sam where a newspaper was lying next to an Agent drinking his coffee. Al leaned over, eyebrows raising. “April 16, 1948.” He looked at the handlink as it beeped at him. “Ok, fine. You were right.”

Sam looked up, surprised, but put his head down and wrote furiously on the pad before him. “1948?”

Al looked at Sam’s note. “I mean, it’s not unheard of- you have leapt out of your lifetime before… not a lot but…” Al shrugged, then looked up at his handlink as it beeped and blinked in his hand. “This can’t be right.”

“What?” Sam wrote.

Al huffed. “Ziggy is saying that this woman is classified.” Sam’s look asked the question he couldn’t say out loud. “Well, I don’t know!” Al waved his arms, one disappearing through the man seated in front of them as the hologram interreacted with the world around them. “I don’t know how a whole, entire person can be classified. I’m gonna…” He huffed again and pointed to where Sam suspected the door to the imaging chamber was. “We’ll get it sorted. In the mean time, just…” Al shrugged, disappearing into the air.

Sam sighed, crossing out the notes on the paper until they couldn’t be seen. “Oh, boy.”

~*~

Peggy gaped at the woman across from her. “This is, frankly, the worst interrogation I’ve ever been a part of,” she leaned back and crossed her arms, fighting to keep her breathing even. She was trying to come up with a clue as to where she was or why she was taken, but the woman across from her was giving Peggy as little as Peggy was providing.

The woman sighed gently. “I’ve told you, this isn’t an interrogation. I asked your name.”

She laughed, shaking her head and sitting back into the couch more. “You’ve kidnapped me and you don’t even know my name?” Peggy looked her up and down. She was probably poisoned. Maybe gas. She couldn’t believe they’d managed to get her out of the SSR building without anyone noticing or putting up a fight she didn’t remember. It must have been gas. She wondered how many others they had. “I’m not telling you anything.”

“Miss,” the young, dark- skinned woman continued, closing the notepad she had in front of her. “If you don’t cooperate, we can’t help you.”

“You’ve refused to tell me who you are or why I’m here, and you don’t even know who I am. I believe we’re done speaking.” Peggy’s mind was racing, but she was somewhat relieved to see the woman slip her pad in her pocket and stand.

~*~

Al stood at the entrance to the Starbright Project, waiting patiently. He was sure Sam needed him in some way, that he’d been gone too long now, but surely a few hours wouldn’t hurt.

He hoped.

The black SUVs stopped in front of him, and out stepped a man in a black suit with unnecessary sunglasses as it was nearly night. He turned, and helped a stately woman out of the back. She was old, older than Al, with fine lines around her mouth and an expertly twisted hairstyle. She moved toward Al with purpose, the man following just a step behind.

The woman stopped right in front of him, and the man that followed stepped next to them. “Admiral Al Calavichi?”

“That’s me,” Al gave a short salute. “And you are…”

The man nodded, then held out his hand. “Agent Coulson, and this is Former Shield Director Margaret Carter.”

“Admiral,” she started, in a soft English tone that let Al know exactly who she was, “I believe we have a lot to talk about.”

~*~

Sam was following the flow of people out of the building, thankful for the idea of a general quitting time. He turned his ankle more than once on the pumps, stumbling out of the elevator just as the sound of the imaging chamber set his teeth on edge. He turned his head, but couldn’t say anything in the crush of people. His eyes said it all: where have you been?

“I know, I know!” Al waved his hands, following Sam as he made his way through the building. “I was sidetracked by… well, you’re not going to believe it.”

Sam raised his eyebrows and stopped, hoping for a payphone but settling for the little door to the side labeled “women.” He slipped into the bathroom and checked each stall before locking the door behind him, Al floating through.

“You’ve been gone all day!” Sam accused, dropping his briefcase on the floor.

“Like I said: sidetracked.” Al shrugged, barely able to hide his excitement.

Sam leaned on the sink, exhausted. “Well, it better be good, because tht bull pen was hell. Those guys, this time…” He shook his head and caught his hat as it fell into his hands. “’Coffee, Peggy. Can you take notes, Peggy? File these, would ya, Peg?’” He made a noise of disgust in the back of his throat. “Leaping into women has given me such a different appreciation for them.”

“I have an appreciation for them.” Al pulled the cigar from between his teeth, his eyes unfocusing as he thought back to earlier that day, “And the one that got me sidetracked. When I tell you she was a knock-out! A ten! A real silver fox. I mean—”

“Al!” Sam turned, rolling his ankle and kicking off the heels. “You left me here all day to see a woman?”

“No, actually, I was visited by the head of one of the countries most prestigious intelligence organizations.” He shrugged, a light smile on his face, “who just so happens to be, well…” He smiled and raised his eyebrows.

Sam stared at his reflection, truly seeing Peggy for the first time, mumbling at his friend. “Let’s go, will you?”

Sam’s whisper of desperation stopped the man mid rude gesture and he shrugged. “Anyway, big to-do on arrival, she comes into my office, leaves her goon outside, and starts in on the story.”

Sam tried to straighten his hat in the mirror, feeling nothing of the complex hair style under his hands. “What story?”

“Turns out, you’ve lept into Agent Margaret ‘Peggy’ Carter. She was a Great American Hero, Sam.” Al’s eyes sparkled. “During World War Two she was a code breaker with the SOE then a spy with the SSR. She was Captain America’s liaison to the agency and tracked Hydra through Europe with the Howling Commandos!”

Sam looked blankly at him, then turned to look at the soft-boned woman in the mirror that stared back at him. It didn’t make sense to him that a woman with that kind of resume was relegated to getting coffee and filing paperwork. “Must be the Swiss Cheese… none of that means much to me.”

“She’s one of the best spies who ever lived,” Al threw up his hand and paced the small bathroom. “But that’s why literally her entire life was classified.”

“Classified?” Sam barked out a laugh, pacing the small bathroom. “What do you mean, classified? We have the highest clearance of any—”

Al lifted his eyebrows, punching more buttons. “Not from SHIELD.”

“SHIELD?” Sam ran his hand over his face, shaking his head. “Why did she show up?”

“Any search for her in a government database gets flagged.” Al shrugged. “She said when she saw it was Starbright, she knew she had to come.”

“She remembers?” Sam asked, astounded.

“She can’t. Well, shouldn’t.” He dropped the handlink down and pushed his cigar back between his lips. “She didn’t say if she did or not.”

“But, if she remembers, that means what I’ve needed to change—”

“Is already changed?” Al twisted his face up and shook his head. “No. No, no, no. That’s not how…” He shrugged and sagged. “I was going to say that’s not how this works, but every time I think we have a handle on it, something surprises me.”

Sam looked at the door, knowing it was only a matter of time before someone else was going to try to get into the bathroom. “So then, did she tell you want I’m here to do?”

“No,” All huffed, twiddling the cigar. “but…”

“But?”

He changed the subject. “But Ziggy thinks you’re here to stop an assassination.”

Sam perked up. He wasn’t sure how he could make something like that happen, especially if an actual spy like Peggy hadn’t been able to. “Assassination? Of who?”

“Angie Martinelli.” Al tapped the handlink and started reading off the facts. “Angie Martinelli was a broadway actress. She and Peggy are roomates, living at the Manhattan home of one Howard Stark.”

Sam rolled his eyes, leaning back into the sink. “Now that name I remember.”

“Imagine if Tony Stark had bankrolled us…” Al mused for a moment, eyes bright. He stopped and sighed. “Missed out. Anyway,” He hit the keys again, waiting for the next bit of information to pop up. “Tomorrow afternoon, Angie will be found in her bedroom, half naked with her throat slit. It’s only after the fact that it was discovered she was hiding that someone had been stalking her, meeting her at the stage door, sending her threatening letters…”

Sam leaned back on the sink, “Is that what Peggy told you?”

“No.” All sighed and shrugged. “She made me explain Project Quantum Leap, in detail, and then nodded.”

“Nodded?” Sam asked, confused. “That’s it?”

“Once she knew what it was all about, she asked what we knew about where you were, and then she came up with the same idea Ziggy did- Angie.”

“I don’t like you running around telling other agencies about-“

“You tell SHIELD what ever they ask for, Sam. You know that.” Al, paused and shrugged. “Knew that. Anyway,” He shifted, walking through the sinks as he paced. “She said that missing that Angie was in danger was something she never forgave herself for, and if we could fix it, well…”

“Well, what?”

“She just kinda stopped and looked sad. Asked if we had any way of targeting where you went.” Al frowned. “ I told her no and then she looked up at me and said the damndest thing.”

“What?”

Al, knit his brow, shaking his head. “She said, ‘I suppose you should save her, then, who knows if his chance will ever come.”

“His who?” Sam asked as the door rattled.

“Dunno,” Al shrugged, watching Sam pull his shoes on and grab his briefcase. “She and her goon left.”

“Look, just get me to her apartment and we’ll take it from there, ok?” Sam smiled, opening the door to the face a bewildered young woman.

“Everything ok in there?” She asked, looking Sam over.

“Fine, just…” he paused, smiling, “Classified.”

Sam rushed past her, headed out to save a life.

~*~

Angie stood with her hands on her hips. “What do you mean I’m not going in today?”

Sam matched her pose, the standoff tense in the living area of the Stark apartment they shared. Angie had barely been home, and Sam had only been able to track her down with Al’s help half the time. “I mean, you need to stay home tonight. Both of us do.”

Angie walked right up to him, got in his face the way that only best friends or siblings do. “You’re gonna get me fired, Peg.”

“Call in sick,” Sam held his ground, placing his hands on her shoulders.

“To Broadway?” Angie rolled her eyes and started pacing back and forth. “What in the world could be so important that-“

Sam had one card to pull, and he hoped his plan would be right. Peggy, in the original time line, had missed that Angie was being stalked. Probably, he’d thought more times than he could count as he tried to track the girl down, because she was never around. But Angie knew some of what Peggy did for a living, even if she didn’t know all of it, and he was banking on their bond of friendship being enough cause for Angie’s trust. “Why didn’t you tell me about what’s going on?”

It was enough to get her to stop in her tracks, back to Sam. Her shoulders tightened. “Tell you want?”

“You’re being stalked.”

Angie tried to brush it off with a laugh. “What? Like corn?”

Sam shook his head. It wasn’t a term that was familiar yet. “Who's harassing you?”

“I don’t even know the guy.” Angie looked down at her feet, shaking her head. “It’s nothing.”

“It’s not nothing and you know it,” Sam moved closer to her, lifting her chin to him. Her eyes were filled with tears. “Tell me.”

~*~

Sam was supposed to be on a stake out, the very one he’d heard planned out as he lept into Peggy Carter. He took his own advice and called himself in sick, and now sat with a very disgruntled, and somewhat anxious, Angie, Peggy’s gun sitting next to him on the table as he read.

“Nobody’s coming,” Angie muttered, focusing on the script in her hands.

“You trying to convince me or convince yourself?” Sam asked, looking up from the newspaper in his hands.

“You,” Angie shot back, weakly.

They went back to reading, radio playing softly in the background, when after a few minutes Sam’s head popped up. It was the sound of scratching. Quiet, but there.

Angie watched as he pulled the gun into his hand, slowly standing. Sam hushed her with a finger at his lips.

The imaging chandler door opened, Al popping through. “Sam, it looks like any time between about a half hour ago and-“ He stopped, watching Sam slip through the dark apartment. “Oh, shoot, it’s happening now, isn’t it?”

Sam nodded, Angie following close behind as he swept through each bedroom, Al walking through walls and calling out as he cleared each room ahead.

“You really think someone-“

“Shh,” Sam quieted Angie again. “Stay close, ok?”

She cringed to his hips, following along like the caboose of a train. “You’re the one with the gun, I ain’t going nowhere.”

“Sam!” All called, two rooms ahead. “Here, in the Pantry. One guy coming up the dumbwaiter!”

Sam moved swiftly, Angie following. On Al’s cue, he pushed through the door to the kitchen, hitting the intruder in the face with the door and knocking him back. Angie’s screams mingled with the swing music pouring from the radio as Sam jumped on him, landing a solid right hook before tumbling him to the ground, unconscious.

Between Al’s supportive cries, Angie’s screams, and the music, Sam could barely focus as he reached for the handcuffs in Peggy’s pocket. “Angie, go call the police.”

“Aren’t you-“

Sam shook his head, sitting heavily on the man. “We need the regular police, not the SSR.”

Angie ran out of the room while All finally focused. “Good job, Sam! According to Ziggy,” he paused, tapping the handlink gently before giving it a final hard knock, “Angie lives a long life and has a fabulous career.”

“She get fired for calling in sick?”

All frowned. “Yeah, but it won’t matter. She gets picked up to be a series regular for a radio serial in a few months, then breaks into the movies.”

“Peggy?” Sam asks, slipping to the side of the intruder and sitting on the floor, one hand on him in case he woke up. “She still get to be Director of SHIELD?”

Al knocks his handlink again and it beeps. He smiles and nods. “Yup. Looks like the little information we had didn’t change, so-“ He pause,d listening to a voice only Al could hear back on the other side of the hologram. “What letter?” He waited again, and Sam watched, confused. “There is no letter!”

“Letter?” Sam asked quietly, knowing they only had a few seconds before Angie came back or their assailant came to.

Al shook his head. “Gushy is telling me there’s a letter in my office and it’s been there since Carter entered the waiting room for me to open, top secret, high priority. There’s no letter in my office.”

Sam tilted his head. “There wasn’t a letter in your office.”

Al opened his mouth to argue, but then it hit him. There hadn’t been a letter before Sam changed history.

Now there was.

“I’m gonna go read that letter.”

Al disappeared through the imaging chamber door just as Angie came back. “They’re on their way…” Her voice died out as she got a glimpse of the face of the man on the floor.

“You know him?”

Angie nodded, eyes wide. “That’s our stage manager! You mean to say he’s the one…”

~*~

Al tried to hold on to the feeling that there was no letter. He knew as soon as he stepped outside of the Imaging chamber, whatever had changed in history would feel like reality to him.

He needed to read it, to try to compare it with what he could remember.

He strode through Project Starbright’s halls without saying a word to anyone, holding his hand up to stop people from talking with him. Once in his office, he din’t even bother sitting to open the Manila envelope marked “eyes only, top secret.”

Admiral Calavichi,

If you’re reading this, that means the day has come when my younger self has shown up in your lovely white waiting room. I have been told that this is how this must happen, that to stray from this would be to mess with forces beyond all of our comprehension, and so though I have not given you any reason to trust me, I must ask that you do as I say.

If we do this right, all will stay exactly as it is, for it has already happened, and always will happen this way. Do not ask me how, for I have no understanding of it myself. What I do have is a deep desire for things to be as they are, and not as they could be.

Dr. Beckett has leaped into my younger self. You will find no record of me, as little exists. At that time I was Agent Margaret Carter of the SSR, a spy. I remember nothing of that time when I sat in your waiting room. Whatever right Dr. Beckett put wrong, I have no memory of, and cannot help you with this, but I know that he succeeded, or will succeed.

And when that is over, you must give Sam a message. You must tell him exactly this: He must go to the research level and wait. When he sees him, tell him to go home. Tell him, I’ve said to come home. 1952, to be exact.

The “him” I refer to must remain a mystery, but rest assured both you and Sam will know exactly who when the time comes, as Sam told him that much. He’ll be confused, but accepting, as time travel is not unknown to him.

You must deliver your message. It’s the only chance we’ll have to right this wrong.

Al looked for another page, for something that made sense, but there was nothing except Director Carter’s signature and a date: 1953.

~*~

Sam looked up from his desk in the SSR bullpen as Al stepped into the room, right through a desk and two men passing.

It was always jarring to see his friend moved through like a ghost.

Sam pulled over a pad and wrote, “Why haven’t I leaped yet?”

“Because I gotta show you this.” Al hovered the letter from Director Carter over the pad so Sam could read it. He waited as he watched his eyes go back and forth, Sam mouthing him over and over.

He leaned down, scribbling, “Who do you think ‘him’ is?”

Al shrugged. “No way to tell. We got bupkis on most of her life.” Al sighed. “You know where research is?”

Sam started to answer, but Al felt his heart drop as the blue lightning started to envelop him.

Sam was leaping.

There was no time to go to the research level.

There was no time to right one more wrong.

~*~

Sam took the long moment to let the blood rush to his fingers and toes, to feel the energy that crackled through him just a second ago dissipate. He took a deep breath and let his eyes see and his body feel.

Heels. Again.

Pants. A sensible pants suit.

He looked down in the small office at the papers in his hands. They were marked classified with a symbol that suddenly seemed very familiar. He looked up, searching for the answer he already knew. He picked up the nameplate on the desk and smiled.

“Director Carter,” he mumbled to himself, smiling before placing it back. “Glad to see they finally listened to you.”

He sat in the chair behind him, looking over the documents on the table to try to get a clue as to why he was there when the phone on the desk rang. “He-hello?” He stuttered out.

“Director Carter?” A male voice confidently replied, “You asked me to call when I detected that energy spike?”

“I did?” he asked, then caught himself and cleared his throat. “I did. Yes.”

“Well, I don’t know how you knew it was going to happen, but just now we got an alert from the research subbasement. Do you want me to send someout out?”

He felt fear and excitement run through him, the letter Al had shown him clear in his mind. “No, no. I’ll go.”

“Are you sure?”

He sat back, surprised after all this time they were still questioning her. “You think I can’t handle myself?”

“No, not at- I was just.”

“Thank you for the report, that will be all.” Sam hung up the phone and popped from his chair as the door to the imaging chamber opened.

“Sam—” Al started excitedly.

“I know.” Sam pointed to the plaque on the desk. “Can you get me to… the research subbasement?” he asked, carefully trying to remember the name.

“Yeah. Start moving and we’ll see what…” He tapped the hand link then pounded it against his palm as they moved out of the office. “I’m guessing down.”

Sam started through the base, trying to feign confidence as Al called out lefts and rights to bring him to a set of elevators. Once in, he hit the button and waited for Al to talk, he couldn’t say anything with the other people in there.

“So, you’re Peggy Carter again, Director do SHIELD, this time. It’s April 16th, 1970 and you’re in a SHIELD research facility at Camp Lehigh in New Jersey.” The elevator stopped, and the pair of scientist stepped off, leaving Sam and Al to descend to the lowest research level.

“And I gotta tell someone… to go home?” Sam asked. “I remembered the research level but-“

“Him was all she told us. You’re gonna know him when you see him.” Al emphasized the vagueness with his cigar, pointing it towards the doors. Al sighed, “You gotta tell him Peggy says to go home to 1952.”

“Which means he’s got to be another time traveler?” Sam asked, anxious as the elevator dinged.

He stepped out, Al following. “I’d assume, but you know what that makes out of you and me.” Al shoved the cigar in his mouth, wandering through rows of machines. “There’s nobody here, Sam.”

“There was some kind of energy spike,” Sam whispered, clearing the space one row of desks and shelves at a time. “Something has-“

“It oh.”

Sam stopped in his tracks, “What ut oh?”

Sam could see Al, frozen with his hands up, staring at a a corner he couldn’t see into. “He can see me, Sam.”

“Who?”

He pulled the cigar from his mouth, astounded. “Remember when she said you’ll know him when you see him?”

Sam slipped quietly up beside Al until he saw a figure hiding in the dark, red and white flight suit, nothing that belonged in this time, or any time Sam had ever been a part of, lifting and lowering a shimmering visor on his helmet, eyes wide with surprise and confusion. What stood out, though, was the shield on his arm. Even with his Swiss Cheese brain, Sam would have known that shield anywhere.

“Captain America,” he whispered out, in awe.

“Captain Freaking America,” Al echoed, in nearly as much shock. “She wants us to right that wrong.”

“I can hear you, too.” He let the visor stay down, his face partially hidden but the futuristic helmet. “You seem to know who I am,” Steve started, intensely. “So how about you tell me who the two of you are, and start explaining why you’re impersonating Director Carter.”

Sam smiled. “Oh, boy.”

End A/N: So, there wasn’t a place to PUT this, but the theory in my head goes that Without the visor to the suit up, Steve sees Peggy. However, with the nanotech visor up, which is partially powered by Pym particles and has been affected by traveling through the Quantum Realm, Steve can see Sam as he really is and see and hear Al. I had hoped to work that into the story, but I really liked the idea of ending on an “oh boy” for all my QL fans.

#steggy fic #3P's Fic #SteggyWeek23 #Quantum Leap Crossover #The crossover you never knew you needed but will only make any sense if you actually watched Quantum Leap #If you ACTUALLY read this I would LOVE TO KNOW THAT even if you hate it because I'm absolutely sure it has an audience of just me

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gali-in-distress · 1 year

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Diagnosing Nigel Colbie. Part II

After overanalyzing Nigel for some time I decided upon one disorder that I consider matches with the previous semiology that I established for him here . For now this my diagnosis.

Disclaimer: This diagnosis might not be 100% accurate given that I cannot perform a proper (if any) differential diagnosis in order to rule out other similar disorders. The reason why I can't do that it's because Nigel is a fictional character and all of his "symptoms" are shown with a script in mind in the movie, on top of possibly being exaggerated by Alex, as an unreliable narrator. That being said DO NOT use this diagnosis of a fictional person as a reliable source of information to apply on anyone irl.

Schizoid Personality Disorder:

According to the DSM-V, it's a "pervasive pattern of detachment from social relationships and a restricted range of expression of emotions in interpersonal settings, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts."

The Tell-Signs I found in Nigel are:

"Neither desires nor enjoys close relationships, including being part of a family."

"Lacks close friends or confidants other than first-degree relatives."

We never see Nigel really interacting with other people aside from his family and Alex. Not to mention how unhealthy even those relationships present themselves to be. This seems to be something usual for him, not having friends.

"Almost always chooses solitary activities."

"Takes pleasure in few, if any, activities."

Nigel is extremely focused on history, the order and whatever he has going on with the embalmed animals. These are all related and somehow end up connecting to death as a process.

"Appears indifferent to the praise or criticism of others."

"Shows emotional coldness, detachment, or flattened affectivity."

Associated Features:

"Particular difficulty expressing anger, even in response to direct provocation, which contributes to the impression that they lack emotion."

"Reacts passively to adverse circumstances and have difficulty responding appropriately to important life events."

"Particularly in response to stress, individuals with this disorder may experience very brief psychotic episodes"

From what we can see in Nigel's final moments, how he switched from being calm and in control, to absolutely desperate, violent in a way he hadn't explicitly been before in the story and how he chooses to end his own life (if we take Alex's word for it) I believe that Nigel was experiencing a psychotic episode, one that he did not survive.

Diagnosing Nigel Colbie. Part I.

#nigel colbie #like minds #like minds movie #like minds 2006 #murderous intent #murderous intent movie #like minds analysis #nigel colbie analysis #text #psychology #semiology #cw mental illnesses #diagnosing nigel colbie

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wilderebellion · 1 year

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Citrina Rocks - What Really Happened?

Pure speculation about Ravening War based on "Seeds of Conflict" (episode 1) and the entirety of A Crown of Candy. SPOILERS AHOY for A Crown of Candy

Calorum's history is rich and complex and the fact that we're getting The Ravening War is part of that. Lots of things were mentioned or alluded to in ACoC or the Adventuring Party episodes of that time. (Also possibly in Discord Q&As). I believe Jacques Tomaté being the catalyst for the Ravening War was once such thing mentioned on adjacent media (like AP or Discord).

But Citrina, like many of the Rocks sisters, died over the course of the Ravening War, and Calroy spills almost all the juicy details about the demises of Amethar's sisters. Calroy knows that Citrina didn't die merely by accident, that she was run down in the streets on the orders of Belizabeth Brassica - the broccoli woman's motivations, however, were a mystery even to Lord Cruller. Even though Citrina had always "been sweet" to him, he didn't object or didn't show any remorse for Citrina being eliminated.

Prior to the Ravening War, Belizabeth was "just a bishop". In the first episode of the new series, we see her assisting the aged Archbishop Camille Colliflower and speaking in her stead occasionally. Citrina longs to be associating more with the Bulbian faith. Does she bond with a young Belizabeth over religious interest? Does she become such a shining star of Bulbian excellence that overshadows Bishop Brassica? Camille seems to be an elder,

The part that has always been most curious to me is that Citrina was canonized as a Bulbian saint after her death. I can't decide if that happened in spite of Belizabeth's actions or BECAUSE of Belizabeth's actions, so I'm curious to see if this story will give us more clues.

Ordered to be run over in the street = accident, and nothing to link BB to the scene of the crime. Was death truly the intention or did an attempt at harm go too far? Was it supposed to be insulting or somehow a declaration of higher status on Belizabeth's part?

What was happening on the streets at that time? Was it an uproarious mob of people fleeing, or others of the faith that needed guidance? If she was trying to rescue or help others, it would contribute to the martyrdom aspect that maybe encouraged her canonization.

While there are obvious similarities, I don't want to ascribe a one-for-one ratio of transference between the requirements of canonization for Catholics and Bulbians. But if performing miracles is a part of it, I'm very curious to see Citrina's miracles.

This is the writer in me, but it would be pretty juicy if young Belizabeth, already fueled by jealousy, hears someone talk about how good and saintly Citrina is before she finally makes the order. "The thing about being a martyr means is you have to die."

Especially with rewatching ACoC recently, I want to know more about Citrina's understanding of the world. She was deeply devoted to the Bulb, but we don't actually know how she felt about The Church prior to her death. 5A: During the flashback about Catherine Ghee, Citrina makes a subtle distinction between the judgement of The Church and the judgement of The Bulb. She is concerned with the latter, which makes me wonder if she already saw how the institution was flawed. 5B: Presumably Citrina never had any direct AND public criticisms of the Church. Given that her magic relic is about honesty, I have doubts that she would be talented at covering her tracks like Sapphria.

The honesty power of her Book of Leaves - did that only start after she died, or is it an echo of an ability she had in life?

Did Belizabeth WANT Citrina canonized, or was it a great twist of dramatic irony after wanting her eliminated?

#dimension 20 #the ravening war #d20 spoilers #acoc spoilers #trw spoilers

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marlenacantswim · 5 months

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What's your favorite standalone sci-fi story? We'll set the outer limit (lol) as "Blink" from Doctor Who, which 100% works without any knowledge of the show.

this is one of the most difficult questions i've ever been asked. sci-fi is my favorite genre and i've seen and read a decent chunk of it. it's funny that you mention "Blink" since at this moment in time, that's my answer, though "Midnight" from doctor who's fourth season is a close runner-up. honestly, that season slaps hard top to bottom.

it's not standalone, but the entire story of Babylon 5 is high-tier sci-fi, with how intricately is weaves itself together. any sci-fi that makes me vocalize my amazement or cry is something to hold on to.

the Star Trek: Deep Space Nine episode "Far Beyond the Stars" requires an understanding of our characters (at the very least Sisko) to fully appreciate, as does the episode "The Visitor," but both elegantly tie emotionality into their fantastical stories. Both make me cry; "The Visitor" makes me bawl. "The Sound of Her Voice" has a very simple story, but it's exactly what i mean when i talk about the genre's way of approaching human stories through situations only possible when the infinite of spacetime exists and is accessible.

the Star Trek episode "A Taste of Armageddon" is an excellent piece of sci-fi. all TOS episodes are standalone (minus menagerie part two, if you count that as its own separate episode) so they all count. this one is rather pertinent, discussing the look of war in a digital age, and how that degree of separation from the violence will inevitably lead to the war continuing with no one caring enough to stop it.

there's others i'm forgetting, i'm sure. there's little miniature sci-fi stories talented people write on tumblr that you see floating around, and the ones i happen upon are always great and wondrous. there are a lot of scifi movies in my watchlist that i need to get around to, including the rest of doctor who and almost all of nutrek. and of course, for the sake of this question, i'm only considering the story alone, and not the other aspects that contribute heavily to other sci-fi movies and episodes that i adore.

how about you, benny?

#running my mouth #ask and you shall receive #thank you benny you know it's my favorite genre

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ranseur · 1 year

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Hiya! Thanks for responding to my poll about Dead Dove Do Not Eat tags! I have a follow up question for you, because your angle is one I knew was common, but I haven’t seen laid out in the responses to my poll (except for you!!! Thank you!!!). Are you aware of the origins of the phrase? (From an episode of Arrested Development.) Again, thanks so much for replying, and in such detail!! I really appreciate your contribution to Science. (Aka, my dumbass curiosity.)

Hellooo @aurorasulphur! Thanks very much for facilitating this very scholarly and scientific survey. Also thanks for reading my response. I'm glad my take isn't so uncommon! I'm sorry in advance for subjecting you to read another wall of text where I explain my silly thoughts. (Obligatory Disclaimer: These are only my personal preferences that I'll try to put in words. Anyone may feel free to disagree. I primarily want to explain why I think it's important to have a tag that means 'dark fic in general'.)

Yes, I'm aware of the origins! (Arrested Development is such a funny show.) I debated mentioning in my tags that I knew it, but they were already so long;;; And I had thoughts related to it.

From what I understand, the punchline in the original gag was 'this is exactly what the label (on the tin) says; what did you expect.’ Which is the popular definition from the poll, and again maybe I’m picky about the wording but it’s not the definition I prefer. We already use a tag to emphasize the provided tags ('READ THE TAGS') and a tag to strongly advise viewer discretion ('Don't Like Don't Read). Personally, I broadly define Dead Dove: Do Not Eat (DD:DNE) as 'Dark/Horror Fic- that may or may not criticize itself or be specified', because I’ve only seen DD:DNE used on AO3 to tag dark fic. So in effect, the tag itself is the ‘label on the tin’. Also I think- regardless of what the tag is- readers forfeit their right to complain when tropes that they dislike are properly tagged but they choose to read the fic anyway. I think it's a readers responsibility to check tags. And if writers forget to tag some warnings, DD:DNE could be a useful catch-all, fail-safe tag to have for dark fic in general. (An aside, I also think the symbolism of a dead dove is apt for dark themes, and DD:DNE intuitively reads as a warning, like, 'Don't Dead: Open Inside' from TWD.)

I’ll be the first to point out that my 'dark fic' definition has a flaw, right, because the fics that people tag as DD:DNE will vary depending on where they personally draw the line on what is dark or problematic. I think defining the moral lines of ‘what is problematic’ is a bigger discussion that can’t be fixed by defining one tag; but I still think the vagueness of DD:DNE can be a feature, not a bug. In order to be as clear as possible, many writers tag additional warnings. And even though DD:DNE is almost always accompanied by tags affiliated with dark fic, I think DD:DNE by itself can indicate dark tone more universally than other content warning tags. I think DD:DNE establishes the genre of the story rather than emphasizing the accuracy of tags, on the grounds that sometimes problematic or ‘content warning’ tags can be accurate and true without being dead doves.

For example, a common problematic tag like 'kidnapping'. This tag might mean the fic is a saucy bodice ripper, in which the kidnappee is never really harmed or in danger because they're supposed to melt the heart of the villain. Even though the scenario is an indulgent romantic fantasy, it's still kidnapping, so the tag is accurate. But if a fic is tagged 'kidnapping, DD:DNE’ then, to me, that has an entirely different implication; it means the holodeck safey protocols are turned off (ie, within the fictional story- the setting is no longer a romanticized fantasy; the kidnapper will be cruel, the kidnappee will be in pain, etc.) In this example, tagging ‘DD:DNE’ doesn't emphasize the latter story to be 'more kidnap-y' than the former, but rather it sets the tone; it's going to be a dark story while the former is raunchy romance. Also, if tagged, people who want to read the former fic can safely filter out DD:DNE without filtering out ‘kidnapping’.

Another example- some media properties, like horror films/games, are already loaded with problematic or dark tropes that are canon and expected in the fan content (eg, zombie media with body horror and gore and cannibalism). Readers might be accustomed to seeing canon-typical dark/horror tropes in that fandom. And if some tags, that are usually affiliated with dark fics, fail to express how the tone of a dark setting will be even more dark, then DD:DNE might be used to say ‘this is on another level’.

All said- the definition of DD:DNE that I prefer is useful as an umbrella term to warn readers of dark content. I'm sure there are a dozen ways to tag my above examples differently and still achieve the same results; I just think one tag is easy to filter. Also, the tag really doesn't have to be DD:DNE anyway; theoretically in an alternate timeline where Arrested Development never made the 'dead dove' gag, people still would have found a way to tag dark fic warnings. I think writers who don't know the DD:DNE tag, or choose not to use it, have flagged their fics with tags like 'Bad Ending' or 'Not Safe Not Sane' or just 'Dark'.

So, in my humble opinion, the DD:DNE definition based on the original context of the Arrested Development gag ('i tagged X: believe it!') is technically correct, but misses the point for me. My focus is on the context of AO3 tags and gaps in writer/reader communication. I prefer DD:DNE used as a broad term for genre of very dark or horror centered fic, because I believe reliable tags help us to curate our online experiences. By having clear expectations, we can keep our online sandboxes safer for everyone.

#(hides face in hands)#i'm SO SORRY this was such a long way to say #'hello yes i know the original joke but hrmph i don't wike it'#literally incapable of being concise when i explain myself but i hope any of it made sense and is helpful for your science #asks for ranseur

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shatterspin · 1 year

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Hey, it's me again. I just re-read what I sent yesterday, and, dude (gender-neutral), I was fasting when I sent that, and I was barely awake, and it sounds like I was hating on the Arabic dub...? I mean, sure, I think they're horrible, and part of me dislikes them, but they were still my childhood.

And about the jokes thing, I get that not every single joke can be translated, but at least they can replace them as you said, or when they translate them, they should try to make it less of a mess than they end up being (like the tashkeel usually ends up wrong when they translate everything literally, and you'll have me, kinda likes e3rab, being like, "No, that should be mansoob, it's maf3ool behe?")

It's been a long time since I watched Zane's Sacrifice in Arabic, but I remember little me found it really funny (on an unrelated note, I have a cousin called Zain, and I hated him, so that might have contributed). With Garmadon getting possessed, his screams were... well, I found them funny. It sounded more like he was pooping than getting possessed.

I watched Ninjago on CN Arabic. I don't remember that much of it since I was little (again, I was about 4-5 when it started, and I started watching it on CN MENA in English when I was about 11; I'm almost 17 rn), and I asked my little siblings about it, and they barely remember anything. But I remember most of what @localguy2 said. I don't think they aired the pilots as I didn't know about their existence recently. CN was obsessed with replaying the same episodes over and over again. They also skipped many parts in the episode itself (like any romantic parts), and they ended up cutting some other parts of the episode, where it got confusing. But I do remember S1's finale airing, like I vividly remember watching Wu get out of the Devourer, sipping his tea, when I was little, so I think @/localguy2 just missed it or something. Which just reminded me of another thing. CN Arabic was so inconsistent with its timings. Like let's say, they would air Ninjago from Sunday to Thursday at 5pm. They would randomly decide to put the new episodes on 1 pm on a Friday, and they'd repeat the old episodes between Sunday-Thursday. So, even without CN itself skipping episodes, we already lost many episodes because of that, and catching up with the plot was practically impossible. I don't think I ever watched SoG on CN Arabic, so I either missed the episode, or for some reason, CN decided not to air that one. And wait, DotD got released in Arabic? I never saw it, and I was so confused how Cole was human again. But I never watched DotD in Arabic.

As of Hunted, I switched to watching Ninjago on CN MENA where they air the episodes in English. They still have the thing where they cut out "romantic" scenes and other stuff (for example, in Crystallized, you know the scene where Harumi is getting the Overlord back? They skipped the whole thing. Like you had Lloyd begging Harumi to be good or something idr, and one second later, the Overlord was walking towards Lloyd). They still skip some episodes (not sure if that happened with Ninjago there, but it's currently happening to Monkie Kid). I recently watched some Ninjago on MBC3 (in Arabic obv because I was bored and they were there, so yk?), and I think they're doing a better job than CN Arabic.

Anywayyy, I should probably go back to sleep; I woke up for su7oor, and I ended up typing my whole life story... sorry

ah it’s okay to be a bit mean to such things

i get what u mean abt the jokes thing needing to sound properly but the fact that ur even MENTIONING e3raab to me should be illegal. i already graduated i should not be subjected to thinking about e3raab anymore 😭😭

mbc3 and CNa had unusual rerun times and it was always a mess trying to figure out when the rerun of an episode of a show would air and would require watching the channel for so long (oh the days of me trying to find out when son//ic x reruns were on mbc3 bc they used to show the new episodes when i couldn’t watch tv (i still remember that it’s reruns were at 3 am 😭)) so some of tkose repeating episodes could’ve been the reruns.

even on netflix when i was looking thru the arabic dub for double trouble they just cut the whole scene between nya n bizarro jay which i thought was weird of netflix but i guess that’s just because these episodes were the ones that were shown on TV. but i remember seeing a video on youtube abt the cut off lmk really weird and random scenes off?? i get the whole thing abt the arab world and not showing kids any sort of pda but they used to sometimes allow non-pda but still implied things thru? the cut offs r more lenient these days but they’re still extremely weird and very obvious. i remember spacetoon used to rewrite scenes and edit the scenes so heavily just to not let any romance plot thru, it usually just made them funnier but kids wouldn’t notice much of a difference

#ALSO i had no idea ninjago airs on mbc3 as well! i don’t remember seeing it there #and i wonder if lmk would get an arabic dub #long post #anonymous #arabic dub

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onyxbird · 2 years

Text

This isn't the post I'd been planning to make about my tagging system, but given the Silence on the Set article that went around recently, I want to note a few things for filtering purposes.

Main point 1: Tagging source works is probably the most consistent part of my tagging system. Going forward, I intend to be particularly conscientious about this for Electric Entertainment shows, so people can avoid those as desired. The relevant work tags for the EE shows I have posted about are: #leverage, #leverage aus, #leverage redemption, #the librarians, and #almost paradise.

I sometimes tag specific characters by name or character relationships, but that is less consistent and generally in addition to the relevant work tag, so the work tags would be more reliable for filtering. I also try to tag actors/celebrities by name for content outside the context of a direct role (e.g., interviews, news about them, etc.).

Main point 2: I will probably resume posting some amount Leverage content going forward. At the moment, that article is still very much on my mind with respect to Leverage content, so I'm not at all sure how much I'm likely to engage with other than intending to reblog a few fanart posts I've seen. However, I wanted to mention that some of that content is probably coming back so people have a chance to filter as needed.

Some additional thoughts on point 2 below the cut.

The allegations in that article are deeply disturbing and disappointing, and they're all the more of a gut punch due to the contrast between the real-life mistreatment of crew and what I took away from Leverage in general and the character of Eliot Spencer in particular. I've certainly rethought my support of the company, e.g., I'm no longer interested in finishing Almost Paradise as I had previously intended, and my habit of going to the EE streaming site to watch an episode on a whim or check some episode detail rather than pull out my DVDs is definitely going to stop.

At the same time, there is a lot of good about Leverage that I haven't found in other shows and a huge number of other people that contributed to making it what it was. One of the things I've struggled to reconcile since reading that article was how people responsible for that behavior/work environment created that show and that character. I think part of the answer is that a lot of people contributed to making the show great, while sexual harassment only has to be condoned/dismissed by relatively few people in authority to fester unchecked (ironically, the same problem embodied by a lot of the series' villains), and that another part of the answer is fandom interpretations improving on what was there. (Plus a bit of "good art isn't always created by good people," I'm sure, but the part that baffles me is how much it seems directly contrary to things I loved about the show and character.)

The fandom, and the amazing art and stories and interpretations that it has generated, is what I hope to keep engaging with. I wish everyone the best in figuring out what you're comfortable with on this.

If you have specific content you'd like to see tagged rather than blacklisting the whole show tag, you're welcome to ask, although I can't make any guarantees (I don't think my consistency with subjective tagging is very good).

#silence on the set #tagging #leverage

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cafeinthemoon · 2 years

Text

More Myself Than I Am - Chapter II

Chapter 2/?

Wordcount 3,5k

Title A Good Guy

Fandom Bungo Stray Dogs

Pairing Ryuunosuke Akutagawa X reader

Previous chapter

Symbols ⭕ . ➕ . 💛

Warning (s): brief mention of panic attack in a public space

Tagging @lasidollily @darling-imobsessed (if you want to be tagged in any of my stories, just send an ask or a message 😉)

N. A.: So he's finally among us! Yay! I hope I haven't failed in giving Akutagawa a proper introduction, though this story is simple, direct if compared to other stuff I've wrote before. In this one I want to concentrate in the facts above everything, without leaving the passionate trait of my personal style aside though. Since there's some mystery included, things and people will be introduced little by little, maybe not with the same richness of details from other stories of mine, but just enough to make them important to the whole.

Also, about their names: I know, I KNOW the BSD Japanese characters have the names of Japanese writers, but there's a reason why I chose non Japanese names for my original characters, as you will see.

Anyways I hope you enjoy this new chapter :)

While you cleaned the tables, you were silently thanking the calmness inside the bakery at the last hours of that day: most of the costumers already left, and the few ones still there were preparing to go.

Your boss and your team mates didn’t make any comments, but they sensed you weren’t in the mood for conversations. Two days passed since Virginia’s last crisis and you were still embarrassed for suddenly requesting a day off in order to stay with her. Since things were complicated those days because of the employee on vacation, you knew you were granted with a big favor – but you didn’t like how it felt: most of your colleagues were familiar with your situation and even understood it, but it was always a reason for tension, at least on your side. When those episodes happened, you would always try to compensate working twice as hard and not causing any problems, but that didn’t contribute much to your relief.

On the other side of the street, the sun was almost gone behind the buildings; as you saw it through the glass wall, the redness of its last rays would spread as a vivid background to the rosy, thick clouds above. People were now going back to their homes, some of them entering to buy treats for their children or for themselves, then leaving quickly.

That day left a strange feeling in you, not only for the already mentioned reasons, but for something else. Everything was the same, of course, but you couldn’t shake the idea that something was missing. Were you forgetting to do some tasks or anything?

You were finishing the cleaning session before the end of the shift now, and were back to the thoughts about your sister. While you stood with her the other day, you noticed some strange marks on her skin, like the ones one gain when they bump into the furniture or such. You were going to ask her about it, but other matters kept you occupied and you forgot the fact, only recalling it now. Did she talk about it to the doctor at some point? This could explain why he prescribed a medicine that worked for physical pain… You sighed. Your head has been so noisy those days that from time to time you had to stop it before you got paranoid.

The sound of the front door being opened pulled you out of these thoughts. When you turned to it and saw who was coming in, a silence took over your mind and your surroundings as well, for you understood where that sensation of lacking something was coming from.

You still haven’t seen him today.

Through the door passed a young man dressed in a black coat with high collar, having a white jabot around his neck and frills of the same color covering his wrists, setting off the natural paleness of his skin, only visible on his hands and face, this latter framed by his short, dark hair that ended in thin, greyish locks on each side. Grey was also the color of his eyes, above which he had a pair of light eyebrows, almost absent; his thin lips, as pale as the rest of the skin, only emphasized the serene dignity in his posture.

In fact, it was a curious appearance: one could say he was a hero who escaped from the pages of a gothic novel, but his modern hairstyle would leave no doubts about his true place and time. When he entered the bakery, some people glanced toward him, but the not so friendly look with which they were received was a quiet sign for them to go back to their own business.

When he closed the door behind his back, his gaze passed through the place and stopped on you; your cheeks burned and you were forced to look down to the table.

You continued to work while hearing his slow steps toward it, only raising your face when he spoke to you.

– Evening, y/n-san – he nodded.

You replied accordingly.

– Evening, Akutagawa-kun.

Akutagawa Ryuunosuke was his name. He used to come earlier and spend some time on the same table – that one you were cleaning right now – enjoying his own company with a cup of tea and a treat while observing the people outside.

You still remember, it took weeks of frequent visits until you discovered your respective names. You also found out he was one year younger than you and had a sister; you even suggested him to bring the girl one day, but until that moment he only appeared alone.

Despite his reserved manners, he was the one who first introduced himself. It was funny, now that you thought of it: since his first day there, he took the initiative in every interaction between you, from asking to be served by you to engaging in conversations that would only last until the second or third question and answer. However, months have passed and he still maintained the formalities of the beginning. If you were asked about the reason behind his preference for your services, you would say you hadn’t the slightest idea, but since no harm came from this strange friendship you just followed the etiquette and gave him the good treatment a loyal costumer deserved.

You asked what he was going to have this time and he replied he wanted the same, except for a bottle of water instead of the usual tea. You were about to offer him the table, but he explained he wouldn’t stay that time and asked for a plastic bag to keep the order. You arranged everything and gave it to him.

After thanking you for this small gentleness, he found appropriate to exchange a few words with you before heading to the exit...

But the way he did it made your eyes widen a bit.

– You didn’t show up yesterday.

Though there was politeness in his tone, you couldn’t help sensing a demanding trait in it. What an uncommon way to express preoccupation, you thought to yourself.

Still, you told him the truth.

– My sister had a crisis, so I took the day off to take care of her.

– I see – he replied – I hope she’s feeling better now.

You smiled.

– She does. Thank you.

– Did you call the doctor?

– Yes – your fingers clenched around the cloth you were using to clean the table – He prescribed some medicine, which she’s going to take for this entire week.

Akutagawa was the person who gave you the doctor’s number. There was this day when you came to work moments after helping Virginia with a crisis and tried to concentrate on your tasks as best as possible, but your uneasiness didn’t go unnoticed by him. When you told him what happened, he gave you a small card with the doctor’s name and phone and told you to introduce yourself mentioning his name in case you needed his services.

When Virginia panicked again, you were in the middle of a street, with no apparent source of stress or triggering elements around. The first thing you remembered was the card.

This was the conversation you had on the phone:

– Hello?

– Hello? Is this Dr. Ougai’s number?

– Yes. Who is it?

– I’m y/n s/n. Akutagawa Ryuunosuke gave me your number. He’s a client of mine. I have my sister with me and she’s having a panic crisis. We’re far from home now… can you please come and help us?

– Of course. Tell me the address and how she’s feeling now.

You gave him the requested information and stood with Virginia until he arrived.

You always thought you haven’t appropriately thanked your costumer for such favor, so you took the opportunity now.

– It was too gentle from your part to indicate him – you commented – He’s been helping us a lot these months.

Akutagawa didn’t give you a verbal response, but nodded in acknowledgment. He was about to leave, but still had a request.

– May I ask how long you will stay before your shift ends?

You were a bit surprised, but didn’t refuse to answer.

– A few minutes. We're already finishing here.

– Would you mind if I walk you home? – and, as if justifying his request in face of your surprise, – I've heard that some delinquents have been seen around lately. It is already getting dark. It might be dangerous to walk alone.

You didn’t make any effort to disguise your feelings when you sensed the warmth raising to your cheeks: that was the first time he suggested anything outside the bakery. It was curious, even funny, how things worked with him: his quietness could be taken for shyness by someone who is not familiar with him, but once you established some bond, his honest, direct manners would show, and you would end up understanding that he was far from shy. Akutagawa’s line of action was a counterpoint to your own hesitating nature, and despite not having him as an intimate friend, you found some sort of comfort whenever you interacted with him, as if the daily stress, the countless minutiae around which you were often trapped had no importance when you spoke to each other.

And as a sign of respect for this feeling, you could only give him a positive answer.

– It would be good to have company.

It was then decided that you would organize your things while he waited for you in the bookstore on the same street.

***

When you entered the store, you went through the shelves looking for him, but he was nowhere at sight.

You passed by a shelve with classics, still looking around, until a book caught your attention and you stopped to take a look at it. It was indeed a beautiful work: a reddish-brown hard cover decorated with a delicate floral pattern on the edges and the spine; the title, carved in golden lettering, shared the front with an oval illustration of a countryside landscape, with the silhouettes of a young couple under a tree and a mansion on the top of a hill in the background.

You were so fascinated with the volume that you almost forgot why you were there…

But you were soon reminded.

– Wuthering Heights. Hm.

You startled a bit when you heard him mumbling over your shoulder, but smiled at the fact that he was familiar with the title.

– It is the best and the worst book I’ve ever read in my life – you commented without taking your eyes off the cover – It’s a beautiful story about terrible people. But can we say we’re better than them?

Akutagawa seemed to think of this.

– Sometimes I’m tempted to think we’re worse.

Despite being familiarized to his steady speech, you weren’t expecting such comeback: that was the tone of someone who knew what they were talking about. Was he referring to himself, or to some people he met? If you were a closer friend to him, you’d certainly ask, but you had to keep silence about it out of respect for the circumstances.

You spent a moment looking at the cover, then turned to see the back. You found the price tag... and swallowed.

– I really wanted to buy this edition, but I guess I’ll leave it to another day – you put it back on its place on the shelve – Shall we?

He nodded, not without a last look at the book, and followed you outside.

***

There was less movement on the sidewalks now. The sky was yet to be covered by the blackness of night, but the streetlights were already working: under them, some workers were still heading home, and the sellers were saying goodbye to their last clients before pinning the closed signs on their doors. The streets would be darker and quieter if it wasn’t for the traffic; at some point, a horn was heard, followed by loud swearing: an accident almost happened, but soon the cars moved away from each other and the case was forgotten. You were still looking at the street when a cat appeared out of nowhere and crossed your way, disappearing into an alley; you stopped right before stumbling in the animal, then chuckled at your own distraction.

None of this were new to you. That was what you would find in all the evenings after leaving the bakery. Your eyes were so used to those things that they were no longer seen by them. That time was different only because you were not alone: the quiet presence of Akutagawa somehow changed your impression of everything, as someone who introduces a stranger to their personal space, allowing him to discover a part of their daily life that though had moderate importance, would help to understand who they were outside their usual meeting point.

You didn’t talk much, yet there was no embarrassment between you. Instead of the expected strangeness of a first encounter in a new environment, there was curiosity: why did he choose to walk you home that day and not before? Was he expecting something? Should you ask him about it? Well, truth is that a conversation that starts with such questions would be rather annoying, so you soon left them aside.

At first, you limited your sentences to indicate the directions you should take, while he would make simple, brief questions about the places you were passing by.

– So… you always take this very path to come and go?

– Most of the times, yes. I change it once or twice a week, when I need to go to a store or have other appointments.

– It’s quite a walk.

– I agree. But I don’t have many opportunities to work out, so I walk as much as I can – and after a moment in silence, – Sometimes, when I am too tired, I take the bus and reach home in five minutes or less. But, if I’m being honest, walking alone through these streets is my way to rest.

Akutagawa didn’t reply to that, less because he didn’t know what to say than because there was nothing to add. You didn’t mind it: part of the comfort you felt in his company came from the fact that you both recognized your inability in making small talk, even if you’ve never said a word to each other about it.

At some moment, you heard him cough. He reached for the water bottle right after. You waited until he put it back in the bag to say something.

– Your health seemed okay in the previous days.

Contrary to the expectations, he showed no irritation towards the subject.

– These good periods happen from time to time, but my condition is chronic. It is a consequence from the environment in which I spent part of my childhood.

You didn’t ask for details nor questioned where he used to live. Wherever this place was or how long he had to live in it, it didn’t matter now; all he could do was to take care of what remained form his health now, even if it was little. That was something you sort of respected in him, too: the practical treatment he would give to most of the things. In one of his first visits to the bakery, he had a coughing crisis while you were serving him; the first thing you did was to offer him a glass of water, which he accepted, and since then you would bring water alongside his orders, unless when he said it wasn’t necessary.

You crossed a street and recognized the top of your building ahead.

– We’re almost reaching my home – you indicated the building – It’s in the next corner.

You were approaching the entry when you saw a group standing on the sidewalk, engaged in a cheerful conversation: the first, a girl with curly, brown hair, wearing an elegant dress with flowing skirt, had her arm entwined with a young man’s, a bit older than her; the man, a blonde, tall individual with a large smile and a high pitch tone, was now occupied in telling some funny story to her and to the second girl, a brunette creature with her hair tied in a high bun and dark blue clothing.

You recognized your sisters and Virginia’s boyfriend, Arthur.

The three interrupted the chatting and greeted you with gentleness, but were a bit surprised to see you had company.

You made the introductions.

– Guys, this is Akutagawa Ryunosuke. He’s a client at the bakery. Today he offered himself to make me company on my way home.

Arthur said a low “Evening” to the other man and the girls gave him modest smiles. Akutagawa nodded at them.

You turned to him.

– Akutagawa-kun, these are my sisters, Virginia and Frances, and this is Arthur, Virginia’s boyfriend.

Arthur opened his largest smile and was the first to speak after the formalities.

– Hey, y/n-chan! Virginia-chan needs to cheer up a bit, so we’re heading to that new restaurant at … Street. Wanna join us? – and turning to your partner – The gentleman can come if he wishes, too!

Akutagawa’s gaze turned to you, waiting for you to reply first, which you did.

– I’m sorry, Arthur, but I’m tired. We had one less member in our team today so I had to work twice as hard – and adding a smile to compensate the group’s frustration, – You three, go and have fun!

As you imagined he would do, Akutagawa made his decision according to your own.

– Thank you for the invitation, but I have my own appointments as well. Goodnight – and turning to you – See you, y/n-san.

You smiled in response.

– See you. Get better.

He mumbled a “Thank you” and left with steady steps. There was a second of silence after that and, before you could find an excuse to enter the building, the conversation continued.

– You have such a lovely clientele, my sister-in-law – Arthur commented, raising his eyebrow in a manner that didn’t please you at all – But I bet he’s a good guy. There are a few who do small favors like this to a girl they barely know nowadays.

You wouldn’t describe your own connection with Akutagawa that way. It was true that you weren’t the closest friends, but you weren’t strangers to each other as Arthur suggested. In any case, you sensed it would be useless to try and explain this to him or to your sisters, so you decided to not reply to that.

You were about to pass to the front door and end the talking, but you couldn’t ignore when Frances added a comment that was certainly lingering in her tongue since your client turned his back on the group.

– Maybe he enjoys acting like he’s in the wrong century, Arthur. Didn’t you see those clothes? – she chuckled – Who are you to judge?

Arthur shrugged, oblivious to her cunning tone.

– And who said I’m being judgmental? I’m just pointing a fact!

Sometimes Arthur’s lack of perception – or the purposeful cluelessness in his attitude – used to irritate Frances to the point she would stop speaking to him as if he wasn’t even there, then find someone else to continue her train of thought. That time, she chose you.

– By the way, why did you wish him to get better, y/n-chan? Is he sick?

You gave her a brief reply.

– His health is fragile, that’s all.

The girl frowned, not satisfied.

– I see. He indeed looks like someone with consumption.

That comment, though the seriousness in which it was made, provoked in you an angry that scared even yourself, for it was a feeling that you only thought to be possible in case Frances has insulted an intimate friend or a lover of yours.

Now, you really had to end that conversation.

– Well, whatever it is, his condition is none of our business, since he doesn’t talk about it even to me. But you don’t need to worry, because he’s not helpless in this sense – you turned to Virginia – Dr. Ougai, who treats you, is his friend. He was the one who indicated his services.

Virginia’s eyes widened a bit in genuine surprise, since you haven’t share this fact with her until that moment, but she didn’t say anything; she wanted that chatting to end as much as you. Frances opened her mouth and closed it again, only managing to mumble a “Well...”

Arthur, though he swallowed when Dr. Ougai’s name was heard, was the one who had the most decent reaction among the three.

– So, it seems that he has been a great help for you, girls – and with a cheerful laugh – A gentleman, really!

You passed by them and headed to the door, again wishing them to have fun.

When they moved away on the sidewalk, you glanced to the direction took by Akutagawa to see if he was still under your sight. And for some seconds, he was: you saw when a black car stopped beside him; he opened the right door, on the back seat, and entered.

The car moved and disappeared after turning a corner.

#bsd akutagawa #bsd x reader #bungo stray dogs x reader #akutagawa x reader #akutagawa ryunosuke x reader

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twdmusicboxmystery · 1 year

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11x24: Rest in Peace - Sleeping Beauty and Other Symbols

@frangipanilove:

Oh! Something else I wanted to mention before I forgot it. When Princess radioed Mercer from the train, she called herself Aurora! Massive intersection point there between the “North” symbolism (Aurora Borealis is Latin for the North light) and the “Sirius” symbolism. (Radios are Sirius symbolism.)

But even more awesome, Aurora was the Roman goddess of dawn, who is of course Sirius/Morningstar/Venus symbolism in its own right. “Aurora” is THE Latin world for “dawn.”

This is absolutely magnificent use of the Sirius/North Star symbolism from tptb, absolute brilliance! I could not love it more! Imo, this is a shameless shoutout to TD!

Can’t believe I almost forgot to mention it. It was one of the best examples of Sirius/North Star symbolism of the entire series, if you ask me.

I love this so much! There’s so much attention to detail in the symbolism tptb has applied around Beth over the years. It’s so well thought out, and they’re totally escalating it now towards the series finale. I can’t help but feel hopeful.

The Aurora reference is one of those I’ve kind of been waiting for, like I did with the crowned Victoria bird. It was always something that seemed suitable for TPTB’s modus operandi, and when they said a woman named Aurora tried to get a hold of Mercer, I just gasped!

@wdway:

How well this plays with how AK and Gimple has used Disney princesses to emphasize a clue or hint that they have left us.

I hope you guys find this as amazing as I did. Oh my gosh! She's almost here.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Yeah for sure! That IS amazing. I remember hearing the Aurora name from Princess and immediately thinking of Sleeping Beauty. But it was a passing thought and I never went back to it. I wouldn't have thought to connect it to Sirius via the Aurora Borealis. Great work. I love it!

@wdway:

Your mind works much faster than mine does. I remember hearing Aurora with the call signal from princess and I kept thinking what is that from, why is that familiar? Then I got caught up in the story and let it go. I did not connect it to Aurora the fairy tale Sleeping Beauty until I had read Kari connection to Sirius and then it hit me, wasn't Aurora part of the Sleeping Beauty story. That's when I got up out of bed a little before 3a.m.and went to checked it out after tossing and turning for well over an hour.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

Lol. Not always a good thing, though. My brain was spinning with so many other things in the episode, I never went back to it. ;D But that's why it's good we all contribute, so we don't miss or completely forget about things like this. And to be fair, Sleeping Beauty has always been one of my favorite fairy tales, so I'm more apt to remember it.

@wdway:

If princess mentioning Aurora is a hint towards Sleeping Beauty, Beth then I will take the leap and say that Solomon is about how Daryl feels about Beth.

We had a very clear and for TWD a lingering look at this scene. Lingering meaning a few seconds. There is a green awning above the storefront the name Solomon you could say we have the black and white symbol here black storefront white building and then another sign that again says Solomon Street Barbers.

@galadrieljones:

I totally missed this, somehow. Interesting.

@wdway:

Instead of going on the internet for some research and yes I do know of Solomon. He was the son of David and Bathsheba he was the great wise King and also wrote the Song of Solomon. For more information I went to this handy book.

Why is this important because this book can be seen in twd. It was a book in Deanne's house. I found the title in a scene with Rick.

They describe all the books in one word so here is Song of Solomon.

Did you guys notice that the barber salon is pink?. Also want to mention that in there was a time when barbers or barbershops where the place that you would go for medical treatment.

The more we look at this episode the more excited I become, in the most fearful kind of way, haha.

I thought it was quite interesting that young man had to be 13 before they were allowed to read the book. 13 being considered an adult.

@galadrieljones

This is really interesting Ann. I forgot about Solomon. I think we’ve talked about David before, because he’s a musician. Solomon was his son, and I like the attention to David’s legacy, and how he appreciated love and music and poetry, hence the Song of Solomon. King David and Bathsheba are the subject of the Leonard Cohen song “Hallelujah,” a spiritual song about Judaism.

Song of Solomon is also a Toni Morrison novel. Idk the significance, other than that part of it takes place in Virginia, and it is a sort of grail quest, with Milkman on the hunt for some family gold, and he learns about his family legacy instead, along the way. It’s a very Biblical book. All signs point back to the Bible, which is why that book being at Deanna’s house is so interesting. I mean. It’s like a key.

A couple related thoughts Song of Solomon abbreviates to “SOS.” The barber shop could also be a reference to Samson (Maggie’s story in 5a).

@wdway:

I was checking out something in e23 when I found this.

Packing House 22. I know that I'm probably the only one but when I read that my mind went to terminus and the body parts hanging on meat hooks like a meat packing plant.

Daryl's leggings! He seems to be back to having a dark gray on his right leg and the white laces on his left, left side=Beth.

AK has episodes notes at the end like she always does. Nothing earth-shattering but she avoids talking about amount of time that has passed.

Here are some initials thoughts I had as I read above. I actually feel that the parts of Daryl getting knocked out unconscious and waking up in a strange place not knowing where he was is more of a foreshadowing for the spin-off. I realized that it is a parallel story to Beth in so many ways. There are certain things that we've already been told about the spin-off that fits here.

Daryl gets kidnapped (Beth from the funeral home) He wakes up not knowing where he is (Beth at Grady). He encounters people he's unfamiliar with (Dawn, Edwards and the hospital system.) He tries to figure out a way to get back home (Beth attempting an escape with Noah).

OMG! This might have been obvious to you guys but it just struck me that this is also Rick's story. Which It makes me very excited because Rick and Beth parallel each other and now we're pulling in Daryl to the mix.

The other thing that I love, love is that Gimple have gone out his way to talk about Michonne and Rick's love story. How these two people was separated by a great with Michonne believing that Rick was dead until she found evidence that he was alive. I love this. These two couples, two brothers will have similar parallel stories and similar love stories. 2 couples, 2 brothers, 22.

@twdmusicboxmystery:

After putting together the above conversation, @frangipanilove put together a delightful meta that goes into a lot more detail about the Sleeping Beauty. Stuff. I’ll reblog it as well, but it’s definitely worth a read! Read it at the link below:

https://at.tumblr.com/frangipanilove/aurora-borealis-and-the-roman-goddess-of-dawn/15xdi01whtg6

#beth greene #beth greene lives #beth is alive #beth is coming #td theory #td theories #team delusional #team defiance #beth is almost here #bethyl

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azuresins · 2 years

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I'm about to go off on a long-winded tangent, but. Shout out to the kind people who supported my theory that the Phantomhive Family had strong Irish and Celtic connections and lineage from day one three years ago, or who supported it the moment they read them. The hate has quieted down some, but now and again I'll get hit with a very anti-irish sentiment, specifically. Usually from an anon who either doesn't know much about the history of Ireland, Scotland, or Wales. That don't understand that events of the past are on-going and affect these nations today-- the political nightmare, that is brexit, the division between Northern and Southern Ireland (when the island became divided, why it's divided, who BENEFITS from that, how it affects people today, ect)-- and it's important. Do you *know* how many people are already suffering very real live-life consequences in day-to-day life just because the Queen died? How much is just "on pause" until the grieving period is over? To be honest, it's worse when the sender allegedly does know these things, and...have a very loyalist-mindset; That the inhabitants of Southern Ireland are traitors, and Northern Ireland is somehow... better. That Scotland is "basically wholly integrated" and superior to Ireland, and not in the playful banter kind-of-way. They almost never even mention Wales at all. ...Anyway. I think I just pissed-off the wrong person or something, I want to believe this is just one person trolling me. That's what I tell myself. -- Gradually, more artwork has come out supporting the connection, and more people in the fandom have found additional 'hints' and 'easter eggs' that support this idea that I certainly didn't catch, and I love to see it, SO much. Even if it's outside of manga-canon ( rewatching one episode of Season II of the first anime, 'Solo Butler', the second episode -- I don't know how it escaped my attention but it's of particular interest. ✨). Even if you have different ideas about what o!Ciel's birth name is ( I say 'birth name' -- this is only further complicated if you believe there's a chance the twins were switched ), ultimately I think, one of the driving themes of kuro is that despite namesakes, despite the expectation of others, you are who you choose to be. "Fionn" was a name that the warrior earned, it was not his birth name, either. Maybe that parallel should be added to the theory at a later date, I always second-guess myself when it comes to what might be important. I didn't include this in my theory post. Because whether or not there is a direct connection to what I am about to say to Kuro, is hard to prove. I'm not entirely sure. But, it's still important to me. I feel it's meant to be said, should be known, and acknowledged even beyond kuro, for those who are curious. Historians have all agreed unanimously, that the most important part of the Fenian Cycle, is a portion called the "Acallam na Senórach" ( "Tales of the Elders of Ireland"). It's a later tale, told well-after the death of Fionn the Warrior, that features St. Patrick. It's believed and accepted by many, because of this portion, that the Fenian Cycle was allowed to continue to exist AT ALL... and wasn't destroyed, by christians. I don't know how much I, or anyone, can stress the importance of integrating the values and culture of pre-Christian Ireland, with the ... "new ways" of the catholic church. It was critical in preserving any of the "old ways." There are only five original manuscripts in the world that contain the "Acallam na Senórach".

That being said, the oldest surviving manuscript of that five, is in something that was called at the time it was written, "The Book of the White Earl." The "White Earl" was a man named James Butler, an Anglo-Irish lord who also had ties to the 'Ros' family. His scribes and contributions were invaluable, to Irish culture. Celtic culture for many centuries relied on telling their stories and passing them on generationally, not writing them down. Much of what did manage to be written down by scribes was destroyed by the church and St. Patrick himself. -- So when I see a father in a piece of fiction set in Victorian times, of noble birth, said ALSO to be interest in philanthropy, deeply vested in caring for people living on his estate, connected to the Royal Family and meant to be LOYAL to a FAULT, reading his sons 'The Fenian Cycle' as a bedtime story... and then we find out later in the story, this father was brutally murdered. I don't think to myself, 'HUH, HOW IN the WORLD did THAT HAPPEN?' I think there's a reason why he and his mother died young. The multiple appearances of this book and who's touched it, are important in Kuro and MUCH MORE than just a touching fairytale. To me it's just so...obvious, I let my excitement get the best of me and I forget there are people who literally hate my theory to the point, where it's become a sort of ritual to send me disturbing asks. It's been made known to me that people literally BOND over hating the idea and this name, for whatever reasons. ... which is fine, you can have your reasons, you can tell me my ideas are cringe, or whatever and DESIRE for the Phantomhives to be pure Anglo with some possible French decent. By all means, you can dislike the way the name sounds. But now, it's turned into something else... Just. Don't take it out on Irish people in particular, or any of the Celtic nations, or try to downplay or deny, how Integral and influential Celtic culture is to the UK, when you do so. Whether it's "Bait" or not, if I get even a whiff of that kind of message in my askbox I ignore it. The most recent one I got however was incredibly nasty. The sentiments are not only offensive, prejudicial, and in terrible taste, but incredibly tone-deaf and ignorant. It's called The UNITED Kingdom for a reason, and you shouldn't say "UK" when you're only talking about England (or even Britain for that matter). I'm entitled to my interpretation of the in-canon events, the narration, the dialogue, symbolism, and historical context as much as anyone else is. I'm allowed to think objectively, "Finnian" is a grand name. ....So does Sebastian. .....So did Joker. ....So does Our!Ciel. .....So does the gardener, Finny. If you think it's a plain name, that's fine, but that's your objective opinion outside the source material. It's a plain and common name to people NOW. It didn't USED to be. And Finally in all this time, I've never once said anyone else's ideas or theories were 'bad' or 'cringey' or that anyone was forced to agree with me. Literally anyone can headcanon out of them. The entire first season of the anime is an AU of the manga and there isn't a twin at all. So again I say, thank you, to those who have been kind to me whether you agree with all of it, some of it, or none of it. I appreciate it deeply. ... And a big no thank you! To those who have been annoying at best and actually-racist and horrific, at worst. You're driving me to the point where as much as I want to be polite, to respond with your "criticism" with .... Seethe? Cope? Touch some grass, maybe? 🤷 ? I don't know and I don't care, anymore. I'm not going to sit here all day long and "debate" with ... that, I literally wont.

#If you read this far thank you #Finnian name theory #Fenian name theory

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destielshippingnews · 2 years

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Edvard's Supernatural Guide: 2x01 In My Time of Dying - Addendum

(This is an addendum to my analysis of 2x01 In My Time of Dying, which can be found here.)

Due to my eagerness to get my analysis of 2x01 done and published by my 31st birthday, I neglected to discuss some smaller aspects of the episode. Contributing to this was also the fact that the analysis as published is just over 6,500 words (almost a Bachelor’s dissertation in length) and I did not want to bog it down any more, not to mention the 7,500 word essay on the abuse Dean suffered published the week before. However, as I am taking short break from writing and posting analyses whilst teaching an intensive Finnish course at the Bank of Finland, I have the time to write a shorter postscript to my analysis.

The first thing I wanted to discuss was Dean’s belief that his choices dictate his future. Tessa was a representation of divine will and predestination, or even resignation to the inevitable, and Dean was at odds with her. He believed that if he fought hard enough and refused to give up, he could find a way to return to his body. This is a trait of Dean’s which remains fairly consistent throughout the whole show, a few moments of hopelessness notwithstanding (moments of hopelessness Bobby, Cas, and Sam et al wasted no time chastising him for, but that is a story for another time).

He wanted control of himself and his own life, which is one of the reasons the revelation that God had been dictating his whole life affected him so deeply at the end of series 14. His struggles had been in vain because God had decided for Dean at every possible juncture. The natural end to this narrative arc in 15x19-15x20 should have been God’s defeat and Dean taking the reins of his own life, rather than the insulting mess we actually got. As I have said on many occasions, Dean is suicidal and believes nothing awaits him but a bloody death at a young age. Having him die by indirect suicide (the back wound was treatable) undermined years of Dean fighting for a better future for himself and undermined his own belief that one should always keep going, no matter what.

Dean’s philosophy is absolutely correct: everything we do is a choice, and we have to accept that if we want to be active agents in the world. Buffy Summers summed this up in 2x07 Lie to Me with her statement: You might not have a good choice, but you have a choice to a man forced to choose between dying of brain cancer or becoming a vampire. He was not ‘forced’ by anybody to chose becoming a vampire over death, but rather that was one choice out of several possible choices which he made for himself. I do not want to retype Mark Field’s analysis of this episode of Buffy, so instead I will link this video which discusses this very episode:

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Whilst Dean's predicament is not as dire as Ford's was, he chooses not to give in to 'fate', nor to see himself as an object or helpless victim. He chooses to make an impact on his own life and those around him by continuing to fight for as long as he can. Dean is an agent and thereby changes the world around him, simply by accepting and acknowledging his own power as as a human capable of making choices.

Further to the subject of Dean’s beliefs, this episode also presented us with Dean’s false belief that his self-worth is to be found in doing exactly what other people expect and demand of him. Part of this belief is that if other people do not value him, he is not fulfilling their expectations and demands, urging him to therefore strive ever harder to be what other people want him to be.

This belief is evident in Dean shouting at John while Sam visits Bobby. “I have done everything you ever asked, and you’re just going to sit there and watch me die? What the Hell kind of father are you?” Clearly Dean believed (or hoped without belief) that doing what John asked and told him would make John value him and make Dean feel he was worthy of other people.

This is a vicious circle perpetuated by the fact that one’s self-worth is not to be found in ablating oneself and sacrificing one’s own autonomy and self-determination to become a tool in somebody’s toolbox. This false belief is a huge character flaw in Dean, though that is not a criticism of his character. It is entirely understandable and relatable that a son should seek to be worth his father’s pride and admiration, and strive to embody said father’s idea of what a worthy son should be.

John’s death was a huge loss for Dean, as well as a moment of fundamental change. Dean was ever humourless around John, an automaton, but his loss allowed Dean to slowly (very slowly) become more like himself and less like the man John made him be. This is not to say early-years Dean is fake at all, but over the year he allowed himself to enjoy things his father would have disapproved of, and to become more of the person he wanted to be. He gradually learnt (whether consciously or not) that self-worth is not to be found in being what others want, but in being himself around people who accepted him. Sam never accepted Dean for who he was, nor appeared to even understand that his brother was much more than the 2D image Sam had in his mind. Cas, however, did, as did Charlie, Donna, Jody, and even Garth. Dean had worth to them not because he was who they wanted him to be, but because they cared about the people they each were.

Something else I thought worthy of discussion (or contemplation, rather) is how exactly Ghost!Dean interacted with the world. We see him as he was in life, but it is never made clear to the viewer whether this is an accurate representation of being a ghost. It could very well be that ghosts in the Superverse are invisible, disembodied entities walking on the same ground as the living and ultimately experiencing the world in almost the same way as the living. If they have no body, however, then they have no eyes and no way of taking in light to perceive their surroundings. One could argue ‘a wizard did it’, but I am not as content with lazy storytelling as Supernatural is (I hope that does not come back to bite me in the behind when I publish my novel…).

It is possible that a ‘ghost’ is not a disembodied figure or spirit, but rather thoughts, memories, emotions, and experiences on a different plane of existence. If this is the case, then they would not have eyes, ears, or a mouth, and would not interact with the world the same way we do. However, it is possible that such an entity would be able to perceive the brainwaves, heartbeats, and general goings-on of our plane of existence in a way which essentially approximated our senses of sight, sound, touch, smell, and touch.

The fact that Sam as a psychic is able to sense Dean’s presence supports an interpretation like this: as a tiny number of people are able to see infra-red and ultra-violet, Sam can just about detect activity on the spirit plane. Dean’s brainwaves (for want of a better word) in their own plane of existence are able to detect Sam’s, as well as those of everybody around him as well as the location, and he converts it into a form of information he is able to digest and understand. Sam is sensitive to other planes of existence, and so he is able to tap into this and talk to Dean.

It has no bearing on the storytelling, but colours do not exist outside our brain (or eye-sockets), but rather our brains assign colours to different wave-lengths entering our eyes- It is possible that bats’ brains assign different colours to different sounds. If this is true, then bats may hear in colour, meaning that they ‘see’ their surroundings in a way very similar to creatures with eyes, such as us. Ghosts in the Superverse might function similarly, though occasionally they slip through into our plane of existence as psychics such as Sam have some form of access to their plane.

Given this, though the viewer sees Dean in this episode as himself but without a body, this might just be a way of presenting him in a way we can understand, as bats might process sounds with colours. It is also likely that Ghost!Dean interpreted the information he received on the spirit plane in such a way as to envision himself standing in the hospital when in actuality he was pretty much a celestial wavelength of intent.

It is probably best I leave speculation like that here, as I expect the majority of my readership has had enough of it. There were, however, a few other things I wanted to mention before finishing.

Sam showed a side of himself in this episode which really needed to be visible and prominent far more often: that is humility and care for his brother. Despite the fact that his claim that ‘We were just beginning to be brothers again’ is utterly hilarious (they really were not, unless their model for brotherly behaviour was Noel and Liam Gallagher), it was nice to see Sam caring about Dean.

Also rib-tickling was John’s claim that ‘I’ve made some mistakes, but I’ve always done the best I could’, because he most certainly did not do his best. He was on a suicide mission, but he took his children along with him and almost got them killed multiple times. I would have sympathy for John if it were not for the second half of that sentence.

Azazel, however, appears not to know John very well at all, in spite of his overtures at omniscience. “I figured you for many things, but suicidally reckless wasn’t one of them.” If you had only paid attention, Azazel. But as I have said elsewhere, Azazel is a little dumb, as well as hubristic and prideful. He met Dean in 1973 (see episode 4x03 In The Beginning…) and must surely have recognised him in 1x22 Devil’s Trap. He is utterly stupid for making the deal to revive Dean, but as I have said elsewhere, demons in Supernatural are stupid. John said to Azazel “You care a Hell of a lot more about this gun that you do about Dean”, but Azazel knew that Dean would be the one to kill him with the colt. This is why time travel episodes are a bad idea.

One last thing I forgot to mention was that Supernatural is not the first time Jensen and Jim Beaver (Bobby) have been on screen together. Their first time sharing the screen was on 31st October 1997 on an episode of Days of our Lives.Jensen’s character Eric attended the last-minute wedding of his dying father Roman to his ex-wife Marlena before Roman died of AIDS (try convincing me it was not AIDS, I dare you). Jim Beaver played the priest officiating the wedding, which was – predictably – interrupted at the last minute by John et al with the cure for Roman’s AIDS. (It is strange to think that this was very probably the same Hallowe’en I dressed up in a red t-shirt and red tights to be the devil at a Hallowe’en party at my sisters’ Guides’ group. My youngest sister was also three weeks old at the time.)

youtube

Thus concludeth this addendum and my analysis of 2x01 In My Time of Dying. I expect my next analysis of 2x02 Everybody Loves a Clown to be ready in two weeks’ time, and I will not be kind to Sam.

#edvard's supernatural guide #spn rewatch #spn meta #supernatural #spn #dean winchester #sam winchester #john fucking winchester #spn 2x01 #s02e01 #2x01 in my time of dying #bobby #Youtube

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daviddelrealactor · 2 years

Text

The Pitch I presented For an entire articule called "13 Greatest Batman and Superman villains of all time". They never asked me for the complete article. This Pitch was presented to TCJ , CBR and other cómic and Sci-fi sites and lists.

Good morning.

I would like to write an article for your publication in tcj.com called "13 Greatest Batman And Superman Villains Of All Time" . I already have the first draft for what could be the introduction and fragments of the list.

:::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::::

Birth Name: David Israel Rodríguez Zárate

I want to be published as: David del Real.

Home telephone:

011 52 55 (-- -- --)

e-mail: [email protected]

twitter : @DavidRealActor

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13 GREATEST BATMAN AND SUPERMAN VILLAINS OF ALL TIME.

By: David del Real.

Superman and Batman are two of the most famous super heroic characters of all time. Being two of the “Big Three” characters in DC comics, they have fought many of the most terrible and smartest villains . With these two characters, each of them being not only more than 75 years old, but having 75 years of non-stop publication, we have 150 years of interesting stories to choose from. Nevertheless, some of their villains are way more epic than others and only a few of them have so much hate and persistence as to follow them through all the possible media: radio, movies, tv, video games, etc…

The three most important criteria for a villain to appear in this list are:

Number of times he or she has fought either one or both Superheroes and maybe the entire Justice League.

If he or she has ever defeated one of them in any way.

How much he or she contributes to the plot being interesting.

Ninth Position.

MXYZPTLK.

A strange and small individual with god-like powers and a mostly disagreeable sense of humor, this fellow has made these two heroes and all the Justice League members sweat more than once. An interesting thing about him is that he cannot be beaten by strength but always by cunning by making him say his strange name backwards (which turns him back to the 5th dimension where he comes from). Thanks to him we had one of the most memorable episodes of the old 80´s "World Greatest Superfriends" tv series, where he transports them to the “The Planet of Oz” in order to make them get the necessary ingredients to make him invulnerable to he effects of saying his name backwards during this story inspired in the old 1900´s “The Magical Wizard of Oz” novel by Frank Baum and W. W. Denslow.

Honorable mention 3:

BENEDICT ASP.

This villain is guilty of kidnapping and literally making Shondra Kinsolving, his adoptive sister and maybe the only woman that Batman has ever loved, mentally insane. This happened during the comics that followed the epic "Knightfall" saga. So, even when Benedict Asp will never be as epic as most of the villains in this list, he is for sure between the ones that have hurt Gotham´s Dark Knight the most.

Fourth Position.

DOOMSDAY

A strange gloved fist with a forearm covered with cables punching to escape from his prison underground, punching on metal , soil and stone until releasing him and allowing us to see a strange figure almost completely covered with a dark green suit with a grayish brown fist and irregular claws protruding from it. A small incautious bird was his first victim, then a tree, then everything he could find including half a dozen Justice League members that he left severely injured before having his epic fight to the death with Superman. This is the way the Doomsday character was introduced to the world during the events of “The Death of Superman” comic story. Since then, Doomsday has been cast as a formidable enemy for Superman and DC heroes in general many times. We have seen him in the Justice League animated series same as in the DC animated movie “Superman/Doomsday” which is inspired in the “The Death of Superman” comic and we see many copies of him fighting Batman, Superman and Wonder Woman (and her fellow amazons) for the “Superman/Batman: Apocalypse” one. So far, maybe, the most interesting version of him was in the “Smallville” TV series where he is the evil side of a person with a “Jekyll/Mr Hyde” personality. His latest appearance is in the “Batman vs Superman” still showing movie.

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David is a Mexican Engineer with a passion for arts and everything nerdy. Follow him via twitter as @DavidRealActor .

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thorntonkrell-blog-blog · 6 months

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Once upon a time on the network it was Joe Friday in Dragnet. Today, it's Joe Kenda on the stream in Homicide Hunter. We watch Kenda almost every night before we turn off the lights.

Joe Friday, portrayed by actor Jack Webb, was the central character in the classic television series "Dragnet." The original "Dragnet" series aired in the 1950s and early 1960s, and it was known for its realistic portrayal of police work and the "just the facts" approach to solving crimes.

Joe Kenda, on the other hand, is a real-life retired homicide detective, and his experiences and cases are the focus of "Homicide Hunter: Lt. Joe Kenda," a true crime documentary-style series that aired from 2011 to 2019. Unlike Joe Friday, Joe Kenda is not a fictional character but a law enforcement officer who worked on actual homicide cases during his career.

We assumed it was kind of an idiosyncratic guilty pleasure, that we didn't talk too much about. A couple of weeks ago, we stopped over at Mark and Dar's. We asked them if they had ever seen Joe Kenda. At first it didn't ring a bell until we mentioned Homicide Hunter. The bell rang. Dar said they've watched every episode.

Wow

Homicide Hunter: Lt. Joe Kenda," first aired on the Investigation Discovery channel from 2011 to 2019. It lasted for 144 episodes. Mark and Dar had seen every one.

Now because Mark and Dar live near us, are related to us and are friends with us, we consider them to be "normal" people like us. They too are refugees from Rochester.

Joseph Patrick Kenda, known as Joe Kenda, is a retired American law enforcement officer and television personality. He was born on August 28, 1946, in Herminie, Pennsylvania, USA. Kenda is best known for his role in the television series "

The show featured Joe Kenda recounting his experiences as a homicide detective in the Colorado Springs Police Department, where he served for over 20 years. He solved more than 350 murder cases during his career, earning a reputation for his high clearance rate and his dedication to solving crimes.

"Homicide Hunter" became popular for its gripping storytelling and Kenda's distinctive narration style. The show showcased his investigative skills, his personal anecdotes from working in law enforcement, and his efforts to bring killers to justice. Joe Kenda's work in the show and his contribution to law enforcement have made him a well-known figure in the true crime and television world.

Joe Kenda, known for his distinctive and often candid way of speaking, has delivered many memorable quotes during his time on "Homicide Hunter."

"My, my, my…"Joe Kenda often begins his stories with this signature catchphrase.

"The moment you pull the trigger, there's no taking it back. There are some things in life you never forget, and this is one of them."Reflecting on the gravity of violent crime and its lasting impact.

"The bullet always tells the truth."Emphasizing the importance of forensic evidence in solving cases.

"I've seen so many of them. So many victims. And I remember every one of them."Highlighting the emotional toll that dealing with homicide cases can take on a detective.

"Murder is a virus. It is an infection that spreads because nobody cares enough to get in its way."Expressing the idea that solving homicides is crucial to prevent further violence.

"Evil exists, and if you pretend it doesn't, you're a fool."Acknowledging the existence of evil in the world and the importance of confronting it.

"If you kill someone, you get caught."Underlining the idea that murder cases are often solvable and that justice will prevail.

In Homocide the names are not changed, the innocent are not protected.

This was not the case in Dragnet. Jack Webb took real life stories and changed the names of the people in order to "protect the innocent" and produce fictionalized portrayals. In doing so, Dragnet became a forerunner to both metaphysiction and faction which had/has a resounding impact on Thornton Krell and all of his students.

Just as Kenda has his personal idiosyncratic sayings, Joe Friday has a set of his own that have gone down in the history of teevee.

Joe Friday, the iconic character from the television series "Dragnet," played by actor and creator Jack Webb, is known for his straightforward and no-nonsense style of speaking. Here are some famous Joe Friday quotes from the show:

"Just the facts, ma'am."This is perhaps the most famous catchphrase associated with Joe Friday, emphasizing the importance of sticking to the facts in an investigation.

"This is the city: Los Angeles, California. I work here. I carry a badge."Joe Friday's opening lines from the show, setting the tone for his role as a dedicated police officer."

"We were working the day watch out of robbery."Joe Friday often began episodes by narrating the specifics of the case he and his partner were investigating.

"All we want are the facts, ma'am."Reiterating his commitment to obtaining accurate information during interrogations.

"The story you are about to see is true; the names have been changed to protect the innocent."Joe Friday's disclaimer at the beginning of each episode, emphasizing the show's commitment to depicting real-life police work.

These shows illustrate the evolution of crime-related television programming, moving from fictionalized portrayals " to real-life accounts reflecting the changing tastes, viewing capabilities and interests of audiences over time. Both shows have left a mark in the crime and law enforcement television genre.

True crime television has evolved from being a niche interest or guilty pleasure into a significant and mainstream genre within the television industry. It has gained a substantial following and a dedicated viewer base. Many factors contribute to its popularity and transition into a mainstay of television:

Diverse Content: True crime television now covers a wide range of subjects, from historical cases to contemporary investigations, cold cases, forensic science, and legal procedures. This diversity allows for a broad audience appeal.

Engaging Storytelling: Many true crime series and documentaries are expertly produced, offering compelling storytelling that keeps viewers engaged and eager to learn about the cases.Human Interest: True crime explores the human condition, including motivations, psychology, and the impact of crime on victims and their families, which can be emotionally resonant for viewers.

Educational Aspect: True crime shows often delve into investigative techniques, forensic science, and legal processes, providing an educational component that appeals to viewers interested in these subjects.

Discussion and Social Commentary: True crime programs often spark discussions about criminal justice, ethics, and societal issues. This engagement in real-world topics contributes to its enduring appeal.

Streaming Platforms: The rise of streaming platforms has made true crime content even more accessible, allowing viewers to binge-watch series and explore a wide variety of cases.

Cultural Influence: True crime has influenced other forms of media, from podcasts to books, and has become a part of popular culture.

True crime television has evolved from a niche genre to a prominent and enduring category of television content. Its ability to captivate viewers with real-life mysteries, investigations, and the human drama surrounding crime has solidified its place in contemporary television programming.

This is all true but how big a "place" does true crime occupy in Modern teevee which brings us back to Mark and Darlene and even further back to Mary and Jon. We share a stream with Mary and Jon. Mary as you know by now is our daughter and Jon will soon be our son-in-law. In our eyes, they are even more "normal" than Mark and Dar.

One night we were choosing episode of Homocide when we noticed a white bar under the episode that we were thinking of watching. The white bar indicates that we've already watched the episode. Neither Lynn nor myself recognized the episode from the description. We watched it and sure enough it was new to us.

Hmmm

how could this be?

Aha

Mary.

We asked Mary if she watched Joe Kenda. She said, "Oh yeah."

Did she watch the show a lot?

Oh yeah.

We told her about the white bar that came on our screen when we attempt to choose episodes that we haven't seen yet.

That's when Jon came in and said that Mary often falls asleep with the teevee on and she tends to fall asleep while watching Joe Kenda which means the show keeps playin through out the night and the white bar goes under each of the episodes that has played while Mary slept so Mary wasn't exactly sure how many of the episodes she had actually watched and which ones had been playing during her sleep.

Therefore when she, like we, picked out an episode to watch we could never be sure if we had seen it before. So we take a guess. Many of the episodes are similar so it's not unusual to get fifteen minutes into an episode before realizing that we've seen that one before.

Mary has the same problem.

So now, having invested fifteen minutes into an episode that we've already seen should we just keep it playing and watch it again or try to find another episode that may or may not have the same situation.

Usually, we watch it again.

Some episodes we have seen three or four times and a few we haven't seen at all.

Now the story that you just read is true but I've changed the names of the characters to protect the innocent. I didn't even write this. Thornton Krell did.

How many episodes are there of Homicide HunterChatGPT

"Homicide Hunter: Lt. Joe Kenda" aired for nine seasons, with a total of 144 episodes. The show originally premiered on the Investigation Discovery channel in 2011 and concluded in 2019. Each episode featured Joe Kenda sharing his experiences as a homicide detective and recounting various murder cases he had worked on during his law enforcement career. The series was known for its dramatic re-enactments and Kenda's distinctive storytelling style. It remains a popular show among true crime enthusiasts.

Once upon a time, in the network it was Joe Friday on Dragnet. Today, in the stream, it's Joe Kenda on Homicide Hunter. ChatGPT

Your statement draws an interesting parallel between two iconic law enforcement figures from different eras and television formats.

what are some famous joe Kenda quotesChatGPT

These quotes capture Joe Kenda's no-nonsense and dedicated approach to his work as a homicide detective and his commitment to seeking justice for victims and their families. His unique storytelling style and memorable catchphrases have endeared him to fans of "Homicide Hunter."

Joe Friday famous quotesChatGPT

"There are eight million stories in the naked city. This has been one of them."

Joe Friday's closing lines at the end of many episodes, suggesting that the cases he worked on were just a small part of the larger tapestry of urban life.

These quotes capture Joe Friday's no-nonsense and focused approach to solving crimes, as well as the show's dedication to presenting realistic police work. "Dragnet" was a pioneering series in the crime drama genre and left a lasting legacy in television history.

Joe Kenda's opening lines from the showChatGPT

Joe Kenda often began episodes of "Homicide Hunter: Lt. Joe Kenda" with a signature opening phrase that became associated with his storytelling style. His famous opening line was:

"My, my, my... If you think you're going to do whatever you want, and get away with it, well, you're wrong."

This distinctive introduction set the tone for the show and signaled that viewers were about to hear a gripping and often cautionary tale about real-life homicide cases.

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tobthoughts · 6 months

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i love the magnus archives and here’s why:

friday, october 27th, 11:34am

to premise this, i am autistic and this podcast has been my special interest for nearly four years. it is my favourite thing in the world and my safe place when i need time to myself. so no, i will not be taking any criticism. i will be calling the magnus archives “tma” for short throughout this post!!!

"the magnus archives" is a horror fiction podcast created by jonathan sims and alexander j. newall, distributed by the company “rusty quill”. you can find it on almost any streaming platform, including youtube, spotify, apple podcast etc etc. it ran from 2016 to 2021 and is presented in an anthology format, featuring a fictional institution known as the magnus institute, which investigates paranormal occurrences, unexplained phenomena, and supernatural events. the show is framed as a collection of audio recordings, with (almost!) each episode featuring a statement from a person who has experienced/witnessed a strange and often terrifying event. as the series progresses, it becomes clear that the statements are interconnected and part of a larger, ominous narrative involving ancient powers (can i call them powers?), cosmic horrors, and a web of intrigue and mystery.

the show's main character, jonathan sims, is the archivist of the magnus institute, tasked with recording these statements. he becomes embroiled in the dark and enigmatic world of the supernatural as he delves deeper into the mysteries surrounding the institute and its history.

when i tell people that my special interest is a podcast, i think that they assume i just like listening to people ramble, but it’s not quite just the average day-to-day rundown of peoples’ lives. here are a few reasons why i love it:

engaging storytelling: tma weaves intricate statements that span a wide range of themes and characters who are just… normal people that got unlucky. the writing is exceptional, filled with suspense, unexpected twists, and thought-provoking concepts that make you recognise and reflect on your own mortality again and again. i always find myself wondering what i would do if [x] supernatural horror experience happened to me. as well as this, each episode is like a mini-horror story, with its own unique style and mood, which i find to be accessible and engaging for a diverse audience. the way each statement is presented, combined with the slow unfolding of the overarching plot, contributes to the creation of a listening experience that i literally have not been able to find in any other podcast (and yes, i’ve tried welcome to nightvale. it wasn’t the same.)

atmosphere: through a mixture of sound design, voice acting and storytelling, there is never an episode of tma that doesn’t evoke some feeling of unease and tension. i remember listening to the first episode, “anglerfish” while sat in the back seat of my stepdad’s car coming back from a trip, and when i heard the lines “can i have a cigarette?” i got goosebumps and the hairs on my arms stood up. jon sims (voice actor not character; they have the same name) has such a captivating way of reading out the statements that it truly becomes an immersive and spine-chilling experience, even for people who aren’t hardcore fans of the series. use of ambient noise and background music add to the sense of foreboding, while the conversations between characters are so well voice acted that it becomes almost real, as though you’re there with them. i know this is kind of an essential thing when you’re trying to hook an audience, i just think rusty quill do it SO WELL.

complex characters: the characters in the series are well-developed and multifaceted. as you listen, you become emotionally invested in their fates, and i find that the character-driven aspects of the show add depth to the horror elements, because, as i mentioned earlier, the characters are just people. of course there are a fair few eldritch beings and unimaginably disgusting and horrifying creatures scattered throughout, but the core voices, the characters that you really get to know, are just human. normal people. the original archival team - jon, martin, sasha, tim - all start the series as average people who work an office job who then find themselves caught up in a mess so much bigger than they realised, just because they chose to work for the wrong company! even some of the fear avatars (scary characters who show up occasionally) started human, like agnes montague and michael/helen/the distortion, which makes them even somewhat tragic, despite the fact that they’re… well, monsters. because when you listen, you empathise with the characters and feel alongside them because you get to see them grow, you learn their backstories and you begin to relate to them, which is something that is actually quite hard to write in fiction.

interconnected stories: as the series progresses, it becomes apparent that all the individual statements are connected to a larger, overarching narrative. the way in which the show entwines these stories keeps listeners intrigued and eager to uncover the mysteries. names mentioned in passing become relevant later on, and objects from the early statements then become plot points as the story develops - i always find myself going back and listening to previous episodes to understand certain bits and pieces and then going “oh, shit!” when i understand why or where it links back in with the wider plot. this one maybe doesn’t matter so much but for me it made the listening experience more enjoyable, so maybe its something that interests other people too?

and finally, last but not least,

5. exploration of fear: throughout the show, we delve into various forms and aspects of fear, from supernatural terror to more subtle and psychological horror. this exploration of different types of fear allows listeners to connect on a personal level and, once again, adds depth to the episodes and stories. it doesn’t matter if it’s a really profound fear, like the world ending due to climate change, or something really mundane like being freaked out by spiders, the magnus archives explores nearly every single fear or phobia that i can think of. i started listening without much of an idea of the show’s story and thought “i don’t really have many phobias… there’s no way i’ll be able to relate to one of these, right?” and then freaked out when there was an episode surrounding a hyper specific fear i have. it doesn't rely on cheap scares or clichéd horror tropes like a lot of horror media, but instead focuses on the psychology of fear, exploring the root of our deepest terrors and what truly frightens us. this approach to horror was something so different that it really emotionally resonated with me.

the magnus archives genuinely changed my life and i believe everyone should listen to it, even if they've never dipped their toes into the world of podcasts before, because it offers a such unique and transformative experience that i don’t think you can find anywhere else.

i mean, you don’t have to listen to it, obviously, i just think that you should.

it might change your life too.

#diaryposting #blog #the magnus archives #tma #rusty quill

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