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#LOOK AT HIM TRYING TO EAT EGGS
silenthilllz · 1 year
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omg
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skrunksthatwunk · 2 months
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kiryu you were not about to write that on your bucket list you lying faker you gay ass homosexual man
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skeletalheartattack · 8 months
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What are your favourite youtubes to eat food to?
i can't say i really have a favourite honestly, it's kind of luck based. i'll usually try to watch streams while i eat food, but if ive run out of the ones i'm interested in watching, it's likely im eating to a much shorter video.
#ask#anon#i tend to watch rtvs vods or rtvs adjacent vod channels. been watching videochess's star fox adventure streams recently for example#before that i was watching their stream of eggs of steel. since that game kind of stuck with me after scorpy streamed it once in the past#i gotta get back to watching facefullabugs' mother 3 stream since they got back into that recently#as for like. non-stream related content#i watch simpleflips stuff when he uploads stuff#urban rescue ranch i watch a lot of. though i try not to watch his stuff while eating food.#same kinda goes for haha ha's videos sometimes. if theyre building stuff for their cats then its a good watch#if they upload a video of them catching and cooking fish for their cats. i try to watch those later#since they tend to show themself preparing the fish in the video. which isnt great to watch while eating.#but otherwise i just like watching their cats#im not subscribed to any but theres a few tf2 channels that upload clip compilations from 2fort and doublecross and the likes#zeyo is the one ik by name. another has a cat icon. the other only has two videos uploaded on their channel so far.#i just kinda watch them when they appear in my reccomendeds#eager to see quintonreviews last part of his icarly+ videos. his stuffs always incredibly fun to watch#but ive also been rewatching waynes sonic adventurequest streams from the beginning so i have some audio while i work#but also im looking for a song he played on stream and i dont remember where it played amongst the 10 streams#uhhh ive been waiting to see billiams third Lost series episode. because of him i watched through the rest of Lost.#i remember my family watching that show when i was a kid. its pretty fun near the beginning but. near the end man. ough.#also if youre wondering why i replied with the channels in the tags. its cause i knew id be talking a lot#and i dont know if i can add a Keep Reading on a post with the version of the tumblr app from last year.#anyway i hope. all of that suffices as an answer for you anon#thank you for the ask!!!!
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wibble-wobbegong · 11 months
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could a more perfect man exist
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and if i think of jo being really good at extremely niche things for masato's sake who's going to stop me
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chuluoyi · 12 days
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✎ baby to the rescue
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- gojo satoru x reader
in which gojo recruits your baby son to “save” you from a credit card salesman
genre: immense fluff !! baby gojo and dad!gojo shenanigans~
note: based on this and this reel. with this i hereby declare that anything past chapter 235 is null and void HAHA anyway, i truly want to post remarried empress au by this week but since 261 leaks hurt me so much, i need more fluff so have to postpone it to next week :') tagging @karikari19hikariiii <3
a part of gojo's love entries
series masterlist | oneshot masterlist
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Your husband Gojo Satoru... is handsome as hell, which means your baby son is also undeniably good-looking.
"Why do you pout at me?" Satoru poked his squirming baby's cheek while pursing his lips too. "C'mon, smile! That auntie is smiling at you!"
Everyone who passed by them in Shinjuku shopping district turned heads to admire him and his pumpkin just a little longer, and Satoru visibly enjoyed the attention. He smiled back at them, occasionally winking even.
If only they knew how pretty his wife was too...
Wait, no! On second thought, if they know how hot you are, there will be problems!
You had left him to go to the nearest pharmacy to restock some things, while Satoru decided to entertain his baby in the toy section. He basked in the starry-eyed looks people were giving him... until he heard some strange sounds and turned to his baby boy—
—who was chewing the beak of a duck toy with all his might. Satoru was mortified.
"—! Let that go! Your mama will beat me if she sees you eating this!"
Your baby paid him no mind though, desperately pushing the duck into his mouth. Satoru sat him on one of the empty racks and began the tug of war—
"Let go!" he reprimanded. "You're so naughty, gods—!"
Some people were now openly giggling at both of them. His son tried to resist by rolling, and Satoru clicked his tongue. He then yanked the toy away until his baby finally let it go, sniffling sadly that his papa wouldn't let him have the duck.
"Oh, you..." he picked him up again and consoled the pumpkin. "You can't do that, you hear? First, it's not clean. Second, mama will grow two heads to chew you and me both, understand?"
No, your son totally didn't understand a thing. Satoru sighed, seeing his little blue eyes welling up with tears. He ruffled his head and pulled him close. "There, there... I'll get you ice cream, okay? Now let's go."
Satoru was determined to turn his son back into a smiling, happy baby. But just as he was about to head towards the ice cream parlor, he encountered the most unbelievable sight—
"Miss! I guarantee you'll love this credit card features!"
You. That was clearly you, and a salesman (or a bozo, in Satoru's eyes) was trying to bother you.
You raised an eyebrow. "Uh, no— thank you—"
Yet the bozo was still persistent, like the pesky fly he was. "You can use it to pay for your monthly beauty treatments! Someone as pretty as you..." He eyed you from head to toe, blinking suggestively. "Oh my! Your skin is flawless! You have to maintain it this way! I can also give you recommendations for—"
You were wearing a flare dress that made you look so young and petite, and obviously, Satoru too was lusting after you. And true, your skin was smooth like a soft serve of mochi, but still!
You are meant for him and his eyes only! Oho, this bozo would get heavenly punishment.
He had to get to you somehow, but this was public space and if he cooked up some sort of shenanigan, you would put him in sex ban. I can't have that! so Satoru wracked his brain to think of another way...
Once again, his gaze fell on his now calm baby, who was also looking at his mama over there with utter curiosity. And an idea immediately popped up in his mind.
"Hey, kiddo, look at that, a bad man is trying to take your mama," Satoru nudged him as if trying to egg him on. "We can't let that happen. Will you help me to save her, hmm?"
"Mama..." your baby looked back at him so innocently before smiling. "Mamaaa!"
"Good boy." Gods, his baby was so adorable, he almost felt bad for doing this but...
Swallowing his guilt, thinking he would make it up later, he pinched his son's butt a little too firmly—
"WAAAA!" and suddenly, the little boy burst into tears, and even Satoru was surprised by the sheer volume of his wail.
The sudden inconsolable sound of your baby sent you scrambling in panic, your eyes wildly searching for him, completely disregarding the credit card man. "My baby!"
"Eh?" the credit card man was visibly surprised. "Oh... so, you're married...?"
You immediately made your way towards Satoru and snatched your baby from him, hugging him tightly. "Oh, there, there... What happened to you?" you shot your husband a distaste look as your son kept wailing. "Satoru, why is he crying?"
He nonchalantly shrugged. "Maybe missing his mama? Dunno~"
By now, you had completely forgotten the credit card bozo, but he still looked at the three of you in mild surprise. Satoru took this chance to approach him and whisper in his ear:
"You see, my wife doesn't need your credit card," he whistled. "My cards or lumpsum money will do more than enough."
After seeing how pale the bozo looked, Satoru chuckled darkly... before leading you and your son away from the crowd, with one arm possessively around your waist.
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Epilogue
"I'm sorry— I'm sorry, okay!?"
Satoru looked down at his son in utter hopelessness, as the little boy refused to be held by him, looking at him with teary, resentful eyes, and backing away from him in his playpen.
Can babies hold a grudge? Satoru didn't know, but his son definitely was not happy with him, and he couldn't think of any other explanation other than his sin against him back this afternoon.
"I've bought you mochi ice cream!" he opened his palm to reveal the treat. "Don't you want some? Papa will give you some, yeah?"
Baby looked skeptical now, and at that moment, he resembled you so much—accusing eyes, pursed lips, exactly like the expression you would pull when you were unsure of what Satoru might do next. He almost chuckled at the resemblance, feeling giddy.
"C'mon, forgive me, yeah?" he patted his son's little beanie and offered his hand for him to take, eyes crinkling in fondness. "Now, here comes your treat, come closer?"
Your baby crawled closer, seemingly accepting him, and Satoru was all smiles, until—
Whack!
It happened in a flash. He could have avoided it, but he was too taken aback. The pain exploded in his jaw, so intense that he grunted loudly.
"What the—?! You... you—! You kicked me— in the face!"
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tender-rosiey · 6 months
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“GOOD! NOW PUNCH HIS FACE!”
— when your baby and gojo, geto, nanami, toji, and sukuna get protective over you (f!reader)
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a/n: I am alive!! as an apology here is a multi-character post 🙏 btw in toji's part, you're megumi's mom
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GOJO SATORU:
two peas in a pod, twins, copies: these are all things people have called your husband and son.
honestly, they’re not wrong. your son has his father’s looks—satoru swears he has your nose and ears but anyway—and he carries the same protectiveness and love he holds for you, if not amplified.
you can’t count on one hand the amount of times the house has been turned upside down because of their fights for a cuddle session with you.
of course, you have always tried suggesting them simply sharing you, but these problem children would rather eat raw zucchini than ever share the cuddle time.
so while your son is barely six, you can still count on him to team up with satoru against anyone who wrongs you in anyway like what’s happening right now for example.
you’re out with your lovely family to buy some groceries, and since they both were whining about getting some sweets, you allowed them to go and snatch a couple from the next aisle.
on the other hand, you stayed to look for another type of detergent to clean the floor—especially since satoru got this new type of paint for s/n and it’s quite an endeavor to remove it with a regular detergent.
however, being in the cleaning supplies section never guaranteed the lack of filthy men who can’t take no for an answer. this one man approaches you, smug grin on his face as he leans on the wall, “what’s a pretty lady like you doing alone?”
“buying groceries like a normal person; now please leave me alone.”
he quickly frowns, “don’t be so stingy doll,” his hand extends towards your arm, “I can show you a good time; I promise—“
the man is swiftly smacked with an egg on his face, and he is left with the egg dripping down his face, “what’s your wrong with your kid, man?!” he yells at the person behind you.
he then grumbles, “ruined a potential good night.”
“my kid was absolutely right in what he did,” you hear satoru’s voice. you then feel a hand on your shoulder, and you’re pulled into a chest you’re all too familiar with, “’toru—“
your husband shoots a small smile your way, pressing a quick kiss to your lips, before looking at his son, “that last throw was very good, s/n! throw another one but just below his stomach."
a cheshire cat-like grin is plastered on your husband’s face as s/n prepares to launch another egg at the man.
there is a very evident scowl on your son’s face as he yells, “don’t you ever bother mama again, you stinky bum crumb!”
the man gasps and tries to make a run for it, but your son wouldn’t be the son of gojo satoru if he doesn’t manage to land the hit exactly where he wants.
the man quickly crumbles to the ground screaming and alerting literally everyone in the store.
so satoru picks both you and s/n and makes a run for it.
you hold tightly onto him, “wait, ‘toru, the groceries!”
“we can always order! saving my princess and son is more important!”
your son grumbles, “but I want to hit the rude man!”
“me too, champ, but—“ satoru sweat-drops and glances behind him, “I doubt the angry security guards would like that!”
GETO SUGURU:
your twin girls are one of the sassiest to exist.
in a way, they take after their father who is also pretty sassy but very low-key.
the sass of all three combined is terrible to be the victim of. luckily for you, they don’t dare direct their triple ray towards you, especially—in any argument—at least one will try to win you over.
if it’s suguru trying to stay on your good side, then he is hugging you from behind, pressing feather-like kisses on your shoulder and whispering about how sweet you are. if it’s the girls, then they cling to your legs and keep yelling about how much they love you.
so it is safe to say that you have a small squad to protect you from any potential “danger”.
“oh my, dear shouldn’t you focus on refining yourself a bit more?” you hear a woman say beside you.
you turn towards her, offended, “excuse me?”
“I mean,” her eyes scan you, disapprovingly, “you look average at best, and with that you won’t be able to find yourself a husband, let alone have children.”
you’re still processing her audacity as she continues, “but then again, it’s probably for the better that you don’t have children; you can barely take care of yourself.”
“can I help you?” your husband says as he approaches the woman.
she smiles condescendingly before chuckling, “I was simply telling this lady to take care of herself more; she hardly looks presentable.”
geto’s smiles tenses up as he is about to give the woman a calm peace of his mind, but his daughters beat him to it.
your older twin stands in front of the woman, scanning her with pure disgust in her eyes.
she grimaces and voices out her thoughts, “you are like a crunchy lizard.”
the woman gasps, “how dare you—!”
you cut off the woman, curious about your daughter’s conclusion, “why a crunchy lizard, sweetheart?”
your daughter looks at you with a small frown, shaking her head, “a crunchy lizard is an ugly sad lizard.”
a snort escapes your husband, and you’re barely able to contain your smile.
your other daughter follows up, looking at her twin sister, “the lady looks like that one green thingy we saw yesterday,” she taps her little foot, trying to remember and beams at the woman, “shrek! you look like shrek!”
then they both glare at her, frowning, “you’re a monkey!”
your husband doesn’t let it go as he deals the final—subtle—blow, “come on now girls; we shouldn’t bully the lady with the mcdonald’s like hairline anymore.”
it seems like the woman can’t take it anymore as she starts sobbing and running to the hills.
a moment of silence is shared across the four of you, before you carry both of your girls in your arms and start tickling them, “I don’t know whether to be proud of you or scold you, little evil girls!”
they squeal, trying to escape your hold and calling for their father.
geto chuckles and wraps his arms around the three of you, “let them have it for tonight, y/n,” he ruffles their hair, “they were brave and defended their mom, after all.”
“yeah, papa is right!”
“yes mama, please!”
you pout then smirk at geto, “well I don’t mind, and since papa is also very proud of you girls, he will buy any toy that you guys want today!”
the color drains from your husband’s face, and he watches motionlessly as his girls latch onto him, screaming about the toys they want.
you giggle at his expression and blow him a kiss. he reluctantly blows you one back, while the girls excitedly pull him towards the toy store.
NANAMI KENTO:
you and your husband were blessed with the sweetest girl as your daughter, and she was just recently joined by another sweet girl.
you can never forget the happiness on your daughter’s face when she saw her baby sister.
it also seems that no matter how many times you give birth, your husband can’t help but get emotional when he holds your baby. his hands are forever delicate as he cradles her to his chest.
you remember what he said during the birth of your first daughter.
“I feel like a piece of heaven has been plucked and placed in my arms.”
the way he always goes soft for the three of you is honestly adorable.
today, you were going on an outing with your—now 6 months old—baby and your older daughter who is almost six.
your husband never brags about his muscular form, but he never misses a chance to carry the baby or the baby supplies.
you have offered to at least carry the bag, but he always refuses, stating that ‘you already carried the baby for nine entire months in your belly; this is the least I can do.’
so yeah, sometimes you wish to smooch your husband till forever, but that’s not the point.
you’re walking hand in hand with your daughter as she sings her favorite song. you hear someone click their tongue, so you look to the side and lock eyes with an old lady. she takes the opportunity and approaches you.
“you should be ashamed of yourself!” she yells pointing at you, “your husband shouldn’t be carrying the baby supplies nor the baby itself for the matter,” she scowls, “that’s your job!”
“with all due respect ma’am, but that isn’t her job, and taking care of the baby should be something we are both responsible for.”
“yeah!” your daughter huffs, “and don’t take out your sad life on my mama!”
your eyes widen as you stare at your daughter.
on the other side, your husband is just as speechless. your daughter pays no one any mind as she continues, “mama works hard every day! you wouldn’t know that! you immature nugget!”
nanami frowns lightly, “d/n, that’s not nice—“
and for the cherry on top, your baby daughter throws the bottle cap she was playing with at the old lady, and frowns at her.
she starts babbling some nonsense that you're pretty sure are curse words in baby language.
having had enough, the old lady huffs, “the utter disrespect,” and starts walking away.
the rest of the spectators’ eyes follow her till she is out of sight. finally then, people start minding their own business, and you and your little family are left to the aftermath.
you giggle, “that was funny.”
“really?!” your daughter beams.
nanami cuts her off, “no,” he then looks at you with a small frown, a sigh escaping his lips, “y/n don’t encourage them—“
your baby daughter screams happily when she sees her sister smile. she starts kicking her feet with the biggest smile on her own face.
your older daughter starts laughing with her and tries to make her little sister laugh more—she was successful.
meanwhile, you chuckle, leaning on your husband’s shoulder, “admit it, kento; it was kind of funny.”
his resolve softens at the sound of laughter from all three of his girls, “okay, maybe a little, but—“
“yay!!”
ladies: 1
kento: 0
FUSHIGURO TOJI:
your husband and son are so alike, save for the part that your husband is a bit more shameless, and your son is more on the shy side.
however, they both have the same bluntness and the tendency to give anyone who they don’t like attitude.
for example, today, you were walking in the park with the both of them to unwind a bit.
not to mention that megumi wanted to walk his dogs which was a plus, since you would be able to watch your dear son play around with them.
it was all going great until you saw an old ‘friend’ who came running at the sight of you. he was someone who has always been way too touchy and in your personal bubble.
you have tried talking to him about it, but you’re confident that he does it to somehow force you into reciprocating the intimacy.
even if you’re a married woman with a freaking kid.
he giddily clasps your hand, “y/n, ‘been a long time!”
“h-hey,” you smile awkwardly.
he laughs, “I was passing by when I saw your figure, and I couldn’t help but come and say hi.”
you nod, “that’s great, but I am busy, so maybe later?—“
“you’ve gotten even prettier!” he exclaims, “I wish you would finally take me out on a—“
“can’t you see that she is uncomfortable?” your son retorts, “also, you should step back; you shouldn’t touch someone like this without asking them.”
megumi squeezes himself between the both you and glares at the man.
the guy was about to reply to your son, but toji pushes him back with ease, pulling you beside him and hand resting on your waist almost by instinct, “kid is right,” he tilts his head a bit, “ever been taught manners or do I have to do the teaching for you?”
the guy is taken back; offended, he snaps “you can’t speak to me like that!”
“and you can’t hold my mom’s hands like that, but here we are,” your son cleverly sasses him.
on the other hand, your—shameless—husband pulls you into one scandalous kiss and smirks at the guy when he pulls back, “and you can’t hit on a married woman, by the way.”
you hear your son gag in disgust at his dad’s actions, but you’re too busy burying your face in your husband’s chest, hoping that the guy disappears before toji makes even more of a bigger scene.
you also hope that the ground would swallow you, but that’s the alternative option.
the guy clutches his fist, before walking away, spewing insults at the sky—since he is too scared to cuss out your buff husband. once the man is out of sight, toji ruffles megumi’s hair, chuckling, “good job, kid.”
your shy bean’s cheeks redden slightly as he looks away, “…thanks.”
you’re still thinking about what just happened when you slap your husband’s chest, “toji, literally why?” you grumble, patting megumi who started holding onto your leg the moment you hugged toji.
“why not,” your husband shrugs with a small smile, taking pride in your flustered form.
“dad, I want ice cream.”
“no, you just want me to let go your mom, so you can hog her for yourself,” toji grumbles, staring down at megumi.
unfaltering, megumi looks up at him ,“dad, I want ice cream.”
“god damn it, listen here you—“
“divine dogs.”
RYOMEN SUKUNA:
there is no denying that both your son and your husband care for you very much, and they both—very aggressively—compete for your attention.
I am talking he literally throws the kid across the room kind of aggressive, and your son, in turn, throws whatever he has at him.
it’s eventful, but you would be lying if you said that it wasn’t one of the reasons why you will get grey hair earlier than everyone else.
so their very aggressive nature is also shown in their protectiveness over you.
a person doesn’t need to insult or even dare flirt with you for your devil duo to make their life a living hell; your husband and son don’t tolerate someone speaking to you if it causes you to ignore both of them.
for example, this one new servant was clueless to where the broom is, and unluckily for him, he saw you sitting with your husband and son in the gardens. he humbly approached you, “excuse me, m’lady.”
you turn to look at him with a smile, “yes?”
he clears throat, a bit flustered by the attention, “I—I wanted to ask where the—“
“up your ass, you disgusting fiend,” your son sneers followed by his father’s ever-permanent scowl.
“who gave you the permission to come and speak to her so casually?” sukuna presses, and the servant quickly falls to his knees.
“m-my apologies, my lord! I did not mean to disturb you!”
sukuna crosses his arms, “well, you did, and you also disturbed your queen and prince,” his eyes narrow at the servant, “what do you have to say for yourself?”
meanwhile, you’re watching all of that, mouth agape and trying to articulate anything to save the poor guy. you finally find your voice, “sukuna, it’s okay; he didn’t mean—“
your son hugs you tightly and glares at the servant, “to think he would so brazenly speak to you like you’re old friends is terrible, mother.”
you can almost see your son’s cursed energy flaring, and you can spot the small smirk on your husband’s face as he watches his son.
before it escalates any further and you find yet another dead corpse in your palace, you pick up your son, kissing his cheek which makes him flustered and causing him to bury his face in your neck.
you look at the servant, “you’re dismissed, and you can ask the head maid about anything you need, okay?”
“y-yes, m’lady!” he, however, stays glued to the ground, “may I have the permission to lift my head?”
sukuna grunts, “sure.”
“thank you, m’lord,” the servant says, before scurrying towards the gate, having secured his freedom after his little mistake.
or at least, that’s what he thought.
your husband slices his legs off with a flick of a finger, and your son, who has inherited his father’s technique, slices the head off.
and so the body falls to the ground, and the other servants hurriedly start cleaning up the mess.
you frown at your husband, “sukuna! he apologized!”
he rolls his eyes, and pulls you by the waist, “do I look like I care? he shouldn’t have interrupted our time together.”
“aww, you’re jealous!”
“no, I am not—“
“hands off, old man!”
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copyright © tender-rosiey
do not copy or plagiarize or you will be reported
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chaoticace2005 · 3 months
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Rules for the Hazbin Hotel, authored by Vaggie:
1. No drugs.
2. No fights.
3. No pranks.
4. No problematic language.
5. No murder (OR TERRITORIAL GENOCIDE WHAT THE FUCK ANGEL)
6. No smuggling in of drugs. Not by sticking them up your ass. Or by hiding them in a pizza box. Or by slingshotting them to the roof. Or getting someone else to. Not at all.
7. No sexual rendezvous with outsiders in the hotel. No SHOWING sexual rendezvous with strangers to people of the hotel either.
8. Make sure the pig/future pets stay in the patron’s room. (This includes eggs!!)
9. No singing Limit singing to once twice per day
10. Stop flirting with the bartender Angel
11. Don’t call Husk “Husker” unless he allows it.
12. No harassing the staff at all. This includes asking who tops.
13. Don’t suggest anything sexual/romantic to Alastor unless you want your head cut off.
14. NO CUTTING OFF PEOPLE’S HEADS
15. NO EATING PEOPLE
16. NO MAKING CHARLIE CRY.
17. Don’t ask me to put my spear “inside you” Angel, what the fuck?
18. Don’t turn the interior of the hotel into a swamp?! Keep it contained in your room if you must!
19. No stabbing staff or residents. No matter how much they look like bugs! (OR IF THEYRE NAME IS ANGEL)
20. Don’t try and stab bugs if they’re within 10 feet of another demon.
21. Don’t call anyone a “bitch” OR TALK ABOUT HOW MY NAME SOUNDS LIKE “VAGINA”
22. Limit Niffty’s access to sharp objects.
23. NO DEALS ALASTOR
24. No drinking. Limit drinking at bar.
25. No mentioning the Stock Market Crash of 1929. For everyone’s benefit.
26. Don’t blow a hole in the wall.
27. Try to keep roast battles OUTSIDE the hotel. (Or stop picking fights?? Please Alastor I swear to God…)
28. No spying on the hotel for outside sources or putting technology that can be used against us.
29. No evil laughing in the middle of the night, what the fuck Alastor?
30. No building weapons/war machines.
31. No eggs! (Fine the eggs can stay.)
32. Someone please keep an eye on Niffty. (And the eggs.)
33. Stop touching people ANGEL.
34. Don’t make other people storm off HUSK.
35. Respect boundaries.
36a. If Angel looks like he’s about to pass out/cry don’t comment. Let him do his thing.
36b. Don’t try to talk to Angel if he’s on the phone with Valentino. Honestly don’t even mention his phone calls with Valentino.
37. Please don’t call Lucifer “Daddy”
38. Don’t turn into a 20 foot tall demon-eating creature unless absolutely necessary.
39. Don’t cause angry loan sharks to show up at the front door.
40. NO EXPLOSIONS!
41. Rule #2, “No fights” can be broken if the person you’re fighting is Valentino. Or Adam.
42. Don’t lie to your girlfriend or hide the fact you were secretly an angel.
43. DONT TALK ABOUT PEOPLE’S TITS (or lack of)
44. KNOCK BEFORE ENTERING A BEDROOM ESPECIALLY IF SOMEONE’S HAVING MAKEUP SEX
45. Don’t give people makeovers while they’re sleeping, ANGEL!
46. Don’t pretend to eat someone’s pet, ALASTOR
47. Don’t die.
48. I never want to hear the words “cum-plete” again.
49. STOP HAVING FIGHTS ACROSS THE BUILDING LUCIFER AND ALASTOR!!
50. If Charlie is passed out on the couch LET HER SLEEP
51. No making bombs in the hotel Cherri!
52. Stop breaking rules and then saying it’s “FOR SIR PENTIOUS!”
53. Angel don’t try to shoot someone if they break spaghetti.
54. Don’t break spaghetti. Or “ruin” Italian food. Whatever the fuck that means. This apparently includes pineapple on pizza.
55. Don’t mention Valentino unless Angel brings him up first.
56. Don’t comment on Angel and Husk’s flirting.
57. Only call Angel “Anthony” if things are serious (or if you’re Husk)
58. Don’t use any of the nicknames Husk and Angel use for each other. This includes but is not limited to: “Whiskers”, “Legs”, “Kitty”, “Webs”, “Tony”, “Love”, and “Baby.”
59. It’s better not to question whatever facts Husk gives about his past.
60. Family dinners at 6 pm unless you can’t make it due to prior obligation. Game nights after on Sundays.
61. No hunting people for sport and NO KNIFE MONOPOLY.
62. Don’t attach knives to a roomba so you can have a “boyfriend” Niffty.
63. Keep Niffty away from Roombas.
64. Alastor, treat people with decency. Really, it’s not that hard.
65. No making giant ducks that breathe fire to chase people around the hotel just because they call you short.
66. Therapy. Everyone.
67. DONT HAVE SEX ON THE BAR WHAT THE FUCK GUYS?!
68. If Valentino enters the property you have permission to stab him.
69. “Hell is forever” is bullshit. You guys aren’t. You can do this.
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ickadori · 4 months
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“You’re my boyfriend, Zayne, not my doctor.”
You huff as he shakes out a multivitamin gummy into the palm of his hand to join the rest of your pills that you had been forgetting —neglecting— to take.
“Is it not a boyfriend’s duty to look after his girlfriend’s health? If so, I have no problem ending this relationship to reinstate you as my patient.” His eyes slide over to meet yours, and you huff again, this time louder than the last, and thrust your hand out so he can drop the pills and gummies into it. “Smart choice.”
He slides you a prepared glass of water, the condensation leaving a wet streak across the counter, and he wipes it up with a paper towel. Your fingers close around the glass as you go to take the first pill, only for his voice to make you freeze.
“Have you eaten breakfast yet? Taking those on an empty stomach will make you nauseous.” He’s moving towards the pantry before you can even answer.
You blink at his back as your thumb idly rubs at the white pill. “It will? Hm…” Maybe that’s why you had felt violently ill every time you took your medicine - you were a chronic breakfast-skipper. “No, I haven’t eaten yet.”
“Does homemade pancakes, eggs, and sausages sound fine to you?” Your mouth waters at the thought, and your stomach voices its approval with a low growl. “I’ll take as a yes.” His voice is amused as he turns his head to look at you over his shoulder, and you shoot a bashful smile his way before placing your pills a bit to the side so they’re out of the way.
“Do you even have time to make all that? You have a surgery this afternoon, don’t you?” A sudden wave of guilt comes crashing over you, and your eyebrows pull together as you watch him grab all the ingredients. Zayne took care of people at work all day, and nearly everyday, and now here he was taking care of you in the small slot of time he had to relax before being thrust back into work, and all because you’re adverse to taking a few pills.
“There’s plenty of time left before I have to head in and start preparing. Don’t worry.” He assures, and you prop your chin up on your fist with a quiet sigh, knowing it’s no use trying to convince him of anything different.
He works quickly yet efficiently as he prepares everything, his gaze drifting over to you every so often. Soon enough, your apartment is filled with the scent of a delicious smelling breakfast and a plate filled with food is being placed down in front of you along with a fork.
Zayne props his forearms on the marble of the island you’re sat at and nods towards your food. “Eat.”
“A please would be nice.”
“A thank you would be nice.”
“A kiss would be nice.”
“Would it?” A smile tugs at his lips, and you nod with a hum as you pick up your fork. “I think so, too. Perhaps I’ll give you one once your plate is empty and those pills are gone.”
“Pinky promise?” You hold your pinky out to him, and he gives a soft shake of his hair, black hair swishing as he lets out a soft chuckle and twines his finger with yours.
“You’re such a child sometimes.”
“I keep you young.” You cut off a section of your pancakes and stuff it into your mouth, the sweet taste of the syrup coating your tastebuds and making you sigh. “An yawt.” You say around a mouthful of food, and he raises a brow as he moves your glass of water closer to you, but not before using his evol to make it ice cold.
“Don’t talk with your mouth full - you’ll choke.”
You swallow before speaking, fork already moving to gather another bite.
“So? You’re a doctor, you can just give me the heimlich.” It’s his turn to sigh.
“Just eat your food.”
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thexsilentxwordsmith · 8 months
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Spending the night at Simon's for the first time and him waking up to you in nothing but his oversized t shirt
Request from here
***
Eyes blinking as light filtered through his closed lids, Simon began to stir as the first bit of the days brightness filled the small bedroom of his tiny apartment. Slowly those thick, long limbs of his stretched their compressed muscles back to life as the blood flowed through them.
Turning over, he was surprised that there wasn't another body laying next to him under the covers; your bright eyes and warm smile were what he had planned to gaze upon, but there was no one. That put him a little on edge, this being the first time you'd stayed over at his shitty little apartment, but he tried to keep calm until he was fully awake.
Simon moved up onto his elbow as he lay on his side, his large hand rubbing the rest of the sleep that lingered from out of his eyes. He looked about, trying to find any signs of you: your discarded clothes from the night before lay in a pile on the floor right next to your shoes, your earrings still sat on the bedside table, and as he checked the mattress with his hand he found that it was still warm. It was obvious you were still around, he just had to go and find you.
A full yawn passed his lips before he heard the sound of clinks and taps, bangs and rustling coming from towards the kitchen area. So that's where you'd sulked off to, making breakfast no doubt.
God you were too fucking much, he wasn't used to all this sweetness, but he wouldn't change it for anything.
Carefully and quietly he moved out of the bed, scratching at the sparse covering of hair on his bare chest before he stood and straightened his sweatpants around his hips. He was hoping he could surprise you by showing up to catch you in the act.
With easy steps, Simon walked out of the bedroom towards the kitchen and what he saw standing there amidst pots and pans, a stack of toast and a pile of bacon to your right, it took his goddamn breath away.
The expectation was to find you naked, since the only clothes you had were still on his bedroom floor, but that wasn't what he found at all. Your hair had been pulled up, a few stray hairs poking out around your hairline that hadn't been secured and it looked like the only thing you had on was one of his old baggy t shirts.
As you moved, Simon could just see a peak of the underside of your ass pop through the bottom of the shirt, playing peakaboo with him the longer he looked. The lines of your legs, looked even longer as the shirt sat just below your hips. Those juicy limbs looked good enough to eat, bare and glaring back at him.
Fuck, you had never been more beautiful to him; it nearly made his goddamn heart stop beating. Being a big man had its perks and this was one of the best ones he found, that you were able to wear his clothes.
In that moment as he watched you happily go about your work, looking like a comfy dream, images of you doing this full time flooded Simon's mind and his stomach flipped excitedly at the thought. If there was anyone that could make that rough and brazen military man soft, it was you.
And maybe it was about time he let someone do it...
There was a sudden warmness against your back as two bulky arms wrapped themselves around your from behind, making you jump a little at the surprise. " 'mornin, luv," Simon's husky voice hit your ears before his kiss touched your cheek. "See you've made yourself at home."
You leaned into him, enjoying the warmth he still had from being wrapped up tight in the covers moments before. "I just...I wanted to do something nice for you, make us breakfast," you said, giving the eggs in the pan currently in your grasp a flip.
"Pretty sure you do more than enough for a bastard like me," he chuckled as one of those thick mitts moved down and cupped lightly over your sex. "This is all I need to stay well fuckin' fed."
Immediately the heat rose in your cheeks, flushing your face bright red.
"But I meant my shirt," he continued, secretly smiling from ear to ear at how quickly he had you blushing. Certain, heavy movements from his hands flitted across your torso as he rubbed over the lines of your curves through the familiar fabric of his clothing.
"Oh, sorry," you quickly apologized, thinking you had possibly overstepped, "I hope you don't mind, I just needed something and it was just there in the top drawer and..."
Another kiss on your cheek shut you right up. "Look fuckin' good like this, luv," he purred in your ear, his low, gravely morning voice making you shiver.
"Really?" you asked, glad that he wasn't mad you'd commendeered his clothes; in reality you knew it would be nothing, but this being the first time you'd done this, you still had some giddy nervousness about everything.
"Ya look like a fuckin' picture to me," he reiterated, those full lips moving down to your next now as he leaned more against you. "I thought I looked good in this thing, but it ain't nothin' compared to a fuckin' vixen like you."
You giggled playfully at all the sweet praise. Nearly missing the eggs being done, you turned off the stove and set the aside until you both were ready to eat. "Please, I look like hell."
"Bullshit," he said as he turned you around, picked up you, and placed your butt on top of the nearest countertop. He slid in between your open legs, letting his hands run down your side from where he had lifted you, sliding tenderly over the shirt. He was right, you were naked save for the shirt and that did something to his still sleepy brain.
Greedily he tilted his head and leaned up into you, embracing your mouth fully with all of his and making your lips dance together. Feverish and sloppy Simon connected with your lips again and again, making your still sleepy brain flatline.
If you could wake up every day like this it would be a fucking living dream.
His kisses would not let up as he pulled you in closer, his hands running over the curves of your back as he stole your lips with a lazy intensity.
"Breakfast is gonna get cold," you groaned with eyes closed, mouthing the words against his parted lips.
His hips bucked into your own. "Nah, my breakfast feels mighty fuckin' warm to me, luv," he said as he kept right at it.
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yandere-writer-momo · 2 months
Text
Yandere Short Stories:
Play Pretend
Yandere Past Stalker x Fem Reader
TW: unsettling themes, manipulation, stalking (mentioned), yandere behavior, and drugging
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Sizzle. Snap. Pop.
The sounds of eggs frying on a pan filled (your name)’s ears while she sat at the mahogany kitchen table. No matter how many times her husband made her breakfast, she couldn’t quite get used to it… (your name) couldn’t help but feel as if there was something horribly amiss.
A little voice often cried in the corners of her mind that this beautiful man was not her husband. That he was an imposter. Yet she couldn’t understand the voice… this man had to be her husband!
Desiderio was there by her side the moment she opened her eyes when she woke up from her coma. She recalled how his large hands held hers while fat tears rolled down his cheeks. That man clung to her like a lifeline, his lips fervently pressed against the top of her head the moment her eyes fluttered open.
And here she was today! In their house that still felt foreign to her despite the two months that had rolled by… a foreign home with no tv nor a radio. A home full of books, plants, and even six photo albums of her. Yet there weren’t many pictures of the two of them together... Desiderio was an incredibly passionate man when it came to her. (Your name) had no doubt this man worshipped the ground she walked on.
(Your name) jumped when a neatly prepared plate was placed in front of her. Desiderio’s chocolate eyes scanned her face with a frown before he smiled brightly.
“Cara mia, you’re lost in thought again.” Desiderio took a seat beside her, large hand now wrapped around hers. His dark eyes filled with concern. “You’ll get a headache if you think too hard about everything… how about you try some eggs? I prepared them just the way you like them!”
(Your name) smiled at her husband who gently pushed the plate closer to her. “Aren’t you going to eat too, darling?”
The large man shivered at the nickname, a dark blush now on his cheeks. “Yes… but I worry more about you. You’re still so weak.”
Desiderio pressed a kiss on the top of her head before he made his way over to fetch himself a plate.
(Your name) raised a brow at the slightly unsavory taste of the eggs. How odd… had her husband used a new kind of seasoning?
(Your name) continued to much away, blissfully unaware of the twisted smile on Desidedio’s face. The brunette’s hands shook as he tried to keep his breathing calm.
Desiderio had loved this beautiful woman since university nearly a decade ago. He knew they were destined to be together from a single glance and Desiderio would have done anything to make sure that happened…
(Your name) was like a fairy tale princess who was kind to everyone, even someone like him. Desiderio was a loser back then. A nerd with little social skills and a scrawny body, he was half the man his brother was… all his life he was compared to his perfect brother. All because he wasn’t athletic.
Desiderio always yearned for (your name) and her affection. It wasn’t fair that his older brother was the one who swooped her up. His cold, neglectful brother who had the emotional capacity of a rock.
It wasn’t fair! Sirius knew Desiderio loved (your name)! Sirius had everything growing up. The family business, the looks, the love of their parents, the money, everything. So why did Sirius get the girl too?
What could (your name) possibly see in Sirius? Sirius was dull and uninteresting, he was only handsome and the heir to a multi-generational company. He had no other redeeming traits! Desiderio was far more romantic and he always left her loving notes in the locker! Was his heartfelt emotion not enough for (your name)?
Desiderio went into a deep depression when the love of his life married Sirius. He threw himself into medical school and painstakingly climbed up the ladder until he made it to the position of medical director. Desiderio worked out until sweat would puddle at his feet, he grew out his black hair, and he became a beloved member of society to try to forget (your name).
It was pure luck (your name) had gotten hit by that car and ended up in a coma at his hospital. It was destiny that her workaholic husband ignored the frantic calls of the nurses and that he only left his last name down as her emergency contact. It was simply too easy to slip his fingers into the sweet honey pot he had always wanted…
And it was even better that she had amnesia. Now Desiderio could mold her in the way that was always intended… as his wife. There would never be a day where she’d feel unloved or neglected. She’d be pampered and endlessly doted on like the princess she was!
(Your name) let out a cute yawn as she stretched her arms above her head. The sweet sight snapped Desiderio from his musings. Goodness she was so precious… and she was all his.
Desiderio slithered forward to wrap his arms around her shoulders with a smirk.
“Cara mia, it seems you’re still sleepy. How about I carry you back to bed?” Desiderio pressed a tender kiss to her temple. The softest of smiles on his plump lips. “We can lay on each other’s arms for a while longer.”
“You’re always so sweet…” (your name) nuzzled her head into Desiderio’s shoulder as the man gave her a bright smile. “I don’t know where I’d be without my darling husband.”
“You’d just be cold and lonely.” Desiderio would play pretend until the very end.
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Text
Chocolate Princess ♡
Willy Wonka x reader
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Description - Y/n Ficklegruber can't help but become enamoured with the spectacularly peculiar man stood in the middle of the galleria.
Word count - 1.6k
warnings - fluff ♡
a/n: Watched Wonka today with my sister and my little cousins and honestly have never smiled so much during a film. Every bit of it was just pure wondourous imagination. And Timothee as Wonka was just too scrumptious! Who couldn't love him!
Masterlist
PART TWO
--♡--
I began everyday as I always did. Being ungraciously tumbled out of my pink satin sheets, poked and prodded by our various servants, squeezed into the most painstakingly prissy pink gingham dress (with a matching bow for extra faff), and hauled into my fathers car to join him on his way to work.
You see, I am the sole child of famed chocolatier Felix Ficklegruber. Since I had completed my mandatory years of studies, my days consisted of lounging about my fathers office in complete boredom. My mind practically weakened with the mundane repetitiveness of it all, and I knew it would surely combust if it was not stimulated soon. For 2 years now, I had been begging my father to allow me to study at the prestigious university at the edge of town. But each plea had been met with a scoff, an eyebrow raise and sharp “no”. Even the library was off limits.
I paced around his office, deliberately scuffing my mary janes against the carpet. I smirked at how each scrape made his face tick as if it was being flicked.
“Would you cease that infernal racket. I am trying to work, precious girl.”
“What work? All you do is sit up here eating your own chocolate.” I slumped down onto the disgustingly green couch.
“Please darling, you are giving me a headache, I must ring for my 8am mocha.” He picked up the telephone, clasping his fingers to his eyes.
I drummed my fingers against my dress and clicked my heels together. “You know,” I trailed off. “I wouldn’t be here to bother you at all if…I was at the library.”
The phone was slammed back onto the receiver which made me flinch. He rose from the desk and stalked his way towards me.
“No daughter of mine will be caught in some stuffy book prison-”
“That’s not entirely correct..”
“--That are refuge for the ugly, the untalented and the p–” He dry heaved. I winced at the possibility of another spew. “The p-” I lunged for a bowl as he spluttered.
“I know what you are going to say so maybe we should avoid any bodily functions.” I picked up his monogrammed hanky and wet it from my glass of water. I dabbed the cool liquid against his mouth. His eyes softened at my action and his hand softly clasped around my wrist.
“Sweetheart, you live in complete luxury. Have treasures other children couldn’t even dream of. Why can’t you just stay.” My gaze fell. His hands held my shoulders to turn me around and led me towards the towering window which overlooked the galleria. “Besides, one day you will inherit my pride and joy, my fortune, the very thing that ignites my soul, my–”
“Who’s that?” I interrupted, and pointed my finger to a beautifully disheveled man who had risen atop his suitcase in order to address the crowd. I quirked a smile and took in the strange man, who was truly more a boy, and his frightfully exciting appearance.
The thickness of the window meant I couldn’t hear what the boy was saying but his movements and expressions delighted me to no end. I giggled as he began to flap, mimicking a butterfly. I gasped as he produced from his shallow hat, a large jar of what appeared to be chocolate eggs. But once he took the top off, I shrieked in delight, as each little egg floated up as if carried by wings.
I felt my father stiffen before he shoved me away from the window.
“Now, now sweetheart. Do not bother looking at this man any longer. Clearly another hopeful vagrant but do not worry.” He lifted my chin with his pinky. “We shall deal with him right now.”
I rolled my eyes, knowing exactly who was ‘we’.
--♡--
Once the three had left their respective stores, I snuck out of our own and managed to squeeze my way through the crowd so I was left behind my father and my, and I regret to say it, godfathers.
They each took a bite of the treats offered by the mysterious man who beamed at them with awe filled eyes.
Even from my limited view I could see the flickers of enjoyment cross each of their eyes as they questioned the different ingredients. But my gazing was caught by the top hatted man. His smile grew even brighter as our eyes met. I felt unsure in the presence of a man such as him and all my normal instincts failed. So I settled on a little wave. He offered a small wave back.
“--100%, the absolute WORST!”
The man jumped out of his skin in glee, mishearing Slugworth because of his focus on me.
“Did you hear that ladies and gentlemen, an endorsement by–wait did you say the worst?”
Anger bubbling in my blood, I finally made my presence known.
“You lie, Arthur. I saw your face! You haven’t enjoyed a treat that much since daddy figured out how to make marshmallow flavored chocolate milk.”
There were murmurs amongst the three in agreement and fond memory of that chocolate milk. But they snapped back and I was held firmly by my father who apologized to Slugworth for my rude behavior. A cane was held down on the hand that gripped me. I looked up and met the sweet face of its owner.
“I am terribly sorry.” With a practiced flick I was released. I looped my hand around my saviours available arm. He led me backwards in comical cautiousness. “But I don’t think she’d like to be held for what comes next.”
Suddenly, the three men began to lift into the air.
“The hoverbugs from mumbai! They love chocolate! You must have put their eggs in the treat!” I exclaimed excitedly, whilst watching the hilarious display.
“Exactly.” In my glee, I hadn’t noticed the adoring look which the chocolatier had fixed on the side of my head.
The fun was interrupted by the chief of police. I rolled my eyes. Slugworth must have phoned.
“Now Ms Ficklegruber if you’d kindly step away from the criminal.” The chief of police gestured and I was led away as they interrogated the man whose name I still didn’t know. I looked on sadly as he was forced to give up his earnings. I shoved off the policemen’s arms, I made my way back over to the man whose face was as solemn as how happy it had been just minutes before. The excitement around the galleria had dimmed as various floating consumers were returned to gravity.
“I am really sorry.” I gestured to the measly sovereign he was left with.
“Don’t be. It was a law and I broke it. These fine men were merely doing their job. But a new day shall bring new promise.” He soldiered on with a smile and once again patted his hat back upon his head. “At least I can make rent.” He flicked the sovereign up and caught it once again.
“Where are you staying?”
“Scrubbits.”
My face fell in sympathy. “You didn’t read the fine print?” I pitied the poor man and what was about to befall him. Scrubbits contract was a common warning amongst residents but as I truly took in the whimsical nature which surrounded this man, I knew he wasn't from here. And that made me smile. This place could use something new.
He sheepishly scratched the back of his head and lowered his eyeline.
“You can’t read?” I questioned but my tone couldn't help but soften.
“I always thought my mama would teach me, but eventually my pursuits became solely chocolate.” I reached out and grasped his arm. Stroking the velvet beneath my fingertips.
Before I even knew what they were, the words left my mouth. “I could teach you.”
He was surprised. “You would? But why?”
“You’re interesting.” I peered back to the shop which loomed behind me. “I need that.”
“Forgive me, I have not even introduced myself.” He took off his hat and leaned into a deep bow. “My name is Willy Wonka.”
I giggled but responded with a curtsy of my own. “Y/n Ficklegruber.”
At the mention of my last name he looked towards the ceiling where my father still hung, gesturing feebly. “Wow. You really have chocolate in your blood. No wonder you’re so sweet.” Both our eyes widened when we realized what he said. A blush spread across my heated cheeks and meeting Willy’s eyes suddenly became impossible.
“Y/N GET AWAY FROM THAT CANDY GRABBING SCOUNDREL!” My fathers voice beat down from the ceiling where he had been watching my entire interaction with Wonka.
“Meet me at the fountain, tonight, 10pm sharp. Daddy will be in a sugar crash by then. It’ll be easy to sneak out.”
Before I could rush off to avoid my father once his feet returned to earth, Willy halted my movements and placed his empty palm out in front of me.
“Before you go, I want to give you something. You shouldn’t have anything I make in bulk. You deserve something a little more…” He placed a cloth over his palm and ripped it off revealing a deep red chocolate heart decorated with tiny flakes of gold. “Bespoke.”
I placed the treat in my mouth and audibly moaned at the taste. This man was a true genius. My father is going to be so mad. I could jump for joy.
“Till tonight, Mr Wonka.”
“Please, call me Willy.” I leaned up and delicately kissed his cheek in a way of goodbye.
--♡--
That night after discovering the true horror of what being a “guest” of Scrubbits included, Willy begged and pleaded with his newest friend, Noodle, to help him sneak out for the night because, in his words, he’d seen…
“The most beautiful girl to ever exist and if I don’t get to see her again tonight, my heart might just burst out of my chest!”
--♡--
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gimmethatagustd · 4 months
Text
morals on sundays | myg
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You're still in love with your ex-boyfriend. Yoongi offers some help to get over him.
○ Pairing: BFF!Yoongi x f!Reader
○ Rating: Explicit/18+
○ Genre: Friends with benefits, angst, smut, fluff
○ 6 / 100 Drabble Challenge (FWB)
○ Word Count: 2,177
○ Warnings: MC's boyfriend cheated on her, post-breakup blues, questionable decision making, fingering so good you'll try to run away from it, pussy eating, too much tongue sucking probably, Yoongi is a boob guy, they have matching Spongebob and Patrick coffee mugs so why aren't they married?? Idiots
○ Notes: Shout out to @sailoryooons for also writing about a daegu boy eating pussy tonight 😌 And, as usual, I wrote this with scrambled eggs for brains and didn't proofread it, so if you see any errors, no you didn't
○ Post Date: January 22, 2024
○ Masterlist | Send me ur thots
○ What was Jai listening to? Imported - Jessie Reyez ft. 6LACK
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Lately, you’ve felt like disappearing – not into a crowded city street in another country or down an unlit dirt road into the unknown, but into the warm folds of Yoongi’s hoodie. You’re already halfway there, with your fingers interlaced with his, shoved into the large front pocket, and your face tucked into his shoulder. 
“Fuck, I hate taking the bus,” he curses, his words turning into a cloud that disappears into the cold air. 
“How much time do we have?” 
Yoongi turns his head, and his lips briefly touch the cold curve of your ear. 
“You’re mumbling. What’d you say?”
“How much time until it comes?” You squint up at him, cheek still pressed against his shoulder. It’s too warm here to want to move. 
“Can’t check the app on my phone unless you give me my hands.” 
“No.” 
Yoongi chuckles and jostles your head by bobbing his shoulders. 
“I thought our date would cheer you up.” His complaint is playful, eyes sparkling in the streetlights when he returns his gaze to the empty road. You should have gotten a taxi. 
“I’m gonna die alone. Doesn’t matter how much late-night pizza I eat or how many stupid action movies I watch,” you grumble into Yoongi’s shoulder. 
“Even when the action movie lead has a super hot sex scene that’s poorly timed and irrelevant to the plot?” 
“Nope.”
“Even when the coolest guy on the entire planet was the one who took you?” Yoongi smiles cheekily, his gaze back on you. He wiggles his shoulders again, hard enough to bounce your head. 
Annoyed, you straighten up, hands still shoved in his pockets. The movie wasn’t that bad. The pizza was actually great. You’re just depressed. 
“I didn’t think it would take this long…” You whisper into the little space between your body and Yoongi’s. He knows you aren’t talking about the bus. 
Yoongi squeezes your hands inside his hoodie. The rest of you might be freezing in the winter night air, but at least Yoongi keeps your hands warm. He keeps your heart warm, too, with his sincere gaze when he looks at you. 
“You were too good for him.” 
Yoongi’s right. He’s always right. 
You’re sufficiently frozen by the time the bus finally arrives. Yoongi pays for you both because he’s trying to make life easy. No bumps in the road, no unnecessary stress. He lets you sit in a window seat so you can stare out at the blurry night scenery and have your sad main character moment for as long as it takes to get to your apartment. 
Once you arrive, he follows you inside and heads straight to the kitchen while you slump down the hall to your bedroom. The cold seeps so deeply into your bones that the sweatpants and sweater you change into barely help increase your body temperature. 
Maybe it’s because the sweatpants and sweater are your ex-boyfriend’s, and the universe wants to keep your body as cold as his heart was. 
In the kitchen, Yoongi uses a wooden spoon to stir hot chocolate in a small pot, your favorite kind that comes in a block of chocolate that melts with milk. It’s likely been years since Yoongi has made you hot chocolate. Cozy winter nights indoors were once commonplace, the two of you alternating between apartments to make each other snacks and treat cuddles like currency. The appearance of your ex put an end to the comfort you shared with Yoongi. It put an end to most things that brought you comfort. 
As you expect, Yoongi has two mugs out on the counter. You reach for yours, twisting it in your hands as you wait for him to finish. 
“Remember when Spongebob tried to become best friends with Squidward instead of Patrick?” Yoongi asks, turning off the stove. He uses a ladle to pour hot chocolate into his pink mug, then pours some into your yellow one. 
“Yes.” 
“He was Squidward. I’m just mad I didn’t get to blow up his house–” Yoongi laughs and nearly spills his drink when you smack him in the arm, “–with bubbles! With bubbles. I’m not homicidal.” 
Rolling your eyes, you set down your mug next to Yoongi’s, both drinks too hot to drink quickly. 
“Thank you,” you mumble, hooking your finger into his hoodie pocket and tugging lightly, the action absentminded. You keep your eyes cast downward because you don’t want him to see your tears if they run. “I’m sorry I’ve been in such a shitty mood. I know it’s been a while, but, it just… I don’t know. I can’t stop thinking about him, and everything fucking hurts…” 
Yoongi slips his fingers under your sleeve and circles your wrist, pulling your hand away from his pocket so he can lace your fingers together. They’re so much warmer now, defrosted by the heat blasting through your apartment and Yoongi’s hot chocolate. 
“Maybe you could start by not wearing his clothes?” Yoongi offers quietly. “Can’t imagine it’s easy to get over someone when you keep them on your body like that.” 
You sniffle and nod. Again, Yoongi is always right. 
“Easier said than done…” you mumble, giving him a weak smile when you finally meet his eyes. There’s something there in his expression, something that seems different. 
You don’t move away when Yoongi steps closer, even when he has you backed against the counter, even when you feel like you’re going to swallow your heart. 
“I could take them off for you,” Yoongi says softly. He lets go of your sleeve to pinch the hem of your sweater, tugging it lightly. “If you can’t do it, I can.” 
“Yeah?” You feel out of breath, maybe because you suck in your stomach when Yoongi’s fingers brush against it. 
“Yeah,” he echoes, fingers sliding along your ribs as he pushes your sweater up. “So you can get over him.” 
It’s a terrible idea, but your stomach flutters when he looks at you with sleepy eyes weighed down by the late hour and lust. He bites his bottom lip, and you feel your resolve slip as easily as Yoongi’s fingers do beneath your clothes. 
“I want to.” The declaration is desperate, and for a moment, you can’t do anything but stare into Yoongi’s eyes with an all-consuming sadness that eats at your insides, gnawing on bones and biting holes into your lungs. “God, Yoongi, I want to.” 
Yoongi touches his forehead to yours, making you close your eyes because he’s too close and you’re too much of a coward. 
“I’m sorry,” Yoongi whispers. His voice is as gentle as his hands on your bare waist, his thumbs caressing your sensitive skin. 
You raise your arms for Yoongi to pull off your sweater. He’s confident when he squeezes your tits, doesn’t even seem caught off guard when he realizes you’re not wearing anything under the sweater. He brushes his thumbs over your nipples as he leans in to kiss you, his tongue tasting sweet from the hot chocolate when he flicks it against yours. 
“Yoongi,” you call out with an airy sigh that harmonizes nicely with the sound of him sucking open-mouthed kisses down your neck. 
“Hmm?” Yoongi hums against the base of your throat, the vibration sending a tingling sensation straight to your clit. He keeps one hand on the counter beside your waist, caging you in, while his other hand cups your pussy over your sweatpants. 
“Oh,” you gasp, your hands immediately finding Yoongi’s firm shoulders when he starts rubbing your clit, occasionally dipping his fingers lower to press against your entrance, soaking the fabric. 
“These are his, too, right?” 
“Y-yes,” you moan as Yoongi pulls down your sweatpants, taking your underwear with them. 
You can’t say you never thought about how attractive Yoongi is; it’s hard to ignore. It’s just that Yoongi is your best friend. If anything were to happen between the two of you, you don’t know if you’d be able to survive losing him, too. You love him. 
But you also love your ex. 
It’s hard to think about that, though, with two of Yoongi’s fingers pumping in and out of your pussy. They’re long, reaching deeper than your own can when you finger yourself, always late at night when you’re lonely. It never feels good after. The clarity always seems to hit too quickly, like being dunked in a pool of ice water. 
Three months. That’s how long it’s been since another person touched you, since you found out your ex-boyfriend had been cheating on you. You didn’t realize how much you missed it until you’ve got your head thrown back and your thighs quivering as Yoongi fucks you with his fingers. You nearly climb up the counter, both wanting him to touch you more and trying to get away because it’s too good. 
Your ex never searched for the spot that would make your legs shake, but Yoongi does. He curls his fingers against your front wall and keeps up his rhythm, moving with your body when you can’t control where it goes. 
“Fuck, right there.” You’re burning up, veins turned to lava that’s rushing toward your core as Yoongi fucks you closer and closer to your orgasm until you’re on the verge of tears because you haven’t been touched in so long and you’re so lonely and you weren’t good enough. You weren’t enough. 
“Wanna make you cum,” Yoongi groans, deep and gravelly, between licking a stripe up your tits and sucking your nipples. 
“Please,” you moan, “Please, I’m so close.” 
Your arousal gushes around his fingers, slicking them up and making your pussy squelch when Yoongi flutters them inside you. He keeps his thumb pressed against your clit, almost too hard. It stops you from bucking your hips, but you can barely stand as it is. 
Yoongi’s lips are back on yours, red from sucking your nipples until it hurt. He whispers against your lips and opens his mouth to let you suck on his tongue with a pathetic whimper. 
“Not yet, though.” 
“Wha– Yoongi, no–” It’s embarrassing how loudly you cry out when Yoongi slips his fingers out of your pussy. You feel the fire in your core simmer until you’re left with a painfully throbbing clit and your juices smeared on your inner thighs. 
“Shhh, you know I always take care of you.” Yoongi shuts you up with a bite to your bottom lip. He leans down slightly to squeeze the backs of your thighs and hoist you up onto the counter. “Lean back.” 
The cold marble counter sends shivers across your body, but it can’t keep up with the heat of Yoongi’s mouth on your pussy. He kisses your lips so gently that you think you might actually cry before he pushes your thighs back, opening you up. 
“Oh fuck,” you moan as Yoongi goes straight for your clit, sucking on it as he swirls his tongue around it. You dig your hands into his hair and tug the strands hard enough to make him moan into your pussy. “Use your, use–” 
Yoongi laps at your clit in quick, consistent bursts that fall in line with the tempo he’s fucking you to with two fingers again. His free hand presses against your lower abdomen, keeping your body taunt so you don’t buck into his face or curl inward. It’s bad enough that you can’t stop your legs from shaking when one rests on his shoulder and the other drapes over the crook of his arm. 
It’s messy and loud, Yoongi licking and sucking your pussy like he really is trying to empty your mind of everything but the way the tip of his hot, wet tongue feels swirling your clit and the stretch of his fingers when he slips a third inside you and focuses on massaging the sensitive part of your walls. It’s working. He completely consumes your senses, down to how gorgeous he looks staring at you from between your thighs. 
Your Yoongi, fingerfucking you and sucking your clit like you’re his favorite meal. 
You try not to bang your head against the counter when you finally cum, instead focusing the overwhelming energy into pulling Yoongi’s hair to keep his face in your pussy.
He continues fucking you with his fingers through your orgasm, to the point that you can’t lie still any longer. 
“Yoongi, oh my god, Yoongi, it’s too much,” you whimper and gasp, thighs closing around his head until he finally eases his fingers out of you. 
Strings of your arousal connect his lips with your pussy until he swipes his tongue along his bottom lip, cutting them off. His bangs are pushed off his forehead and his hair sticks up from you pulling on it, but his eyes sparkle and his cheeks are just as rosy as his pink, slicked-up lips. 
“Shit,” Yoongi murmurs, leaning over you on the counter to kiss you. He shoves his tongue in your mouth and lets you suck your juices from it. 
You think you taste better on Yoongi’s tongue than on your ex’s. 
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Disclaimer: All my writing is fictional and for entertainment purposes only. None of these characters are meant to actually represent the real people mentioned in the stories. 
All rights reserved © @gimmethatagustd​ - Do not copy, repost, modify, or translate any of my writing. Do not use my writing for any AI purposes whatsoever. Do not use my fics for anything aside from reading and commenting on them. My fics will only be posted on this Tumblr and on AO3 (gimmethatagustd & daddytaehyungie). Request an AO3 account here. 
@jooniesxbby @seokteoksworld @taegeum @dprmoon @chimmisbae
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girlygirl14534 · 4 months
Text
Body Heat - Bucky x Reader
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Pairing: Bucky x Avenger!Reader
Warnings: Smut, Cock Warming, Snowed In, Only One Bed
Length: 3.7k
Summary: A blizzard knocks out the power in the safehouse where you and Bucky are sharing a bed. Can Bucky keep you warm through the cold night?
Author’s Note: It has been so cold where I live lately and there’s nobody better than Bucky to warm me up. I’m entering this work into @targaryenvampireslayer Blind Date Writing Challenge. I don’t participate in a lot of fandom events, so this was really fun! I used the Only One Bed trope and the Dialogue Prompts “Take your clothes off. Right now,” and “Are you holding back? Don’t.” Happy reading and stay warm! Divider via @firefly-graphics
Read this work on AO3
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“You didn’t even want to get egg rolls,” Bucky whined as you grabbed one off of his plate.
You grinned as you bit into it. He smiled back at you, but his shoulders shifted ever so slightly, tipping you off to his next move. His chopsticks swooped onto your plate in retaliation, but you were ready for him, blocking his attempt on your orange chicken.
He glared at you and you relented. He popped the chicken into his mouth with a satisfied smirk. You rolled your eyes at him and took a sip of your beer. It was a local brew. A little hoppy but not too bitter, with a surprisingly crisp taste. You loved trying beers at every new little town you ended up at. Nothing beat a cold beer after a long mission, even if it was 20 degrees and dropping outside.
It was warm and cozy inside the little cabin. This safe house was cuter than most. It had a little wood stove and lace tablecloth—definitely grandmother-approved. The place was small, but you’d stayed at smaller ones. Although most had at least a few twin size cots. The bed here looked comfortable, but there was only one.
“It’s picking up out there,” Bucky nodded at the window. Outside you could see the snow swirling in the wind.
“The Winter Soldier scared of a little snow?” you teased.
“Oh, shut up. You wouldn’t last ten seconds out there. Remember Helsinki?”
“That is so unfair! I fell into a frozen pond!”
“I told you not to walk on that patch of ice!”
“You were being a know-it-all.”
“That’s because I actually know it all.”
You threw your half-eaten egg roll at him.
“You didn’t even eat it?!”
You shrugged and he glared at you as he finished it. After dinner, you got ready for bed. It had been a long day. When Bucky came out of the shower, you were already under the paisley-printed covers.
He grinned at you. “That’s my favorite bonnet,” he said, nodding at the silky cap on your head.
“You have favorite bonnets of mine?”
He shrugged. “I’ve seen you in enough of them. I love the one with rhinestones on the headband. You look like a queen. The Kirby one is really cute, too.”
“Nice try, Bucky.” You threw a pillow at him. “You’re still sleeping on the floor.”
“Oh no.”
“Oh yes.”
You knew he was going to jump on the bed a second before he did it, but you didn’t stop him. He looked so satisfied with himself.
“Time for bed,” you said as you started stacking pillows on the bed between you.
“Afraid you won’t be able to keep your hands off of me?” he teased.
“Don’t think I forgot how you hogged the couch in Bangladesh.”
“I maintain that you rolled off of the couch by yourself.”
“Well then consider it protection from me rolling you off the bed.”
He laughed as you finished the wall of pillows, marking your territory. You were just grateful that the bed was big enough to have your own space and that there were enough blankets that you wouldn’t have to share. You loved Bucky, but in your friendship you were more likely to trade insults than share the covers. Was there something more behind the words you traded? Maybe. Sometimes it felt obvious that he felt the same and other times you were certain that he just saw you as a friend.
If you were just friends, you were friends that lived and worked in very close quarters. You’d had a lot of hands-on moments working the mission with him today. If you had a little more privacy, you’d probably be touching yourself right now thinking about the weight of him on top of you as he tackled you to the ground to protect you, his hair tickling your face as he whispered a new tactical plan into your ear. Instead you were stuck here, close but not close enough. You sighed in frustration.
“Need a bedtime story?” Bucky asked.
“Once upon a time, a former assassin wouldn’t shut up while his teammate tried to sleep.”
“Teammate? That’s all I am to you?” he asked. The hurt and offense in his voice almost sounded real.
“What do you want to be described as?” you asked.
“Just get some sleep, princess.”
You chuckled and rolled over, soon falling asleep. You dreamt of him, of course. Of his hands on you. One warm, one cold. And then it was just his left hand. It was so cold. You let him keep touching you, of course. You didn’t care if you got frostbite. You just wanted him to keep touching you.
You were pissed when you woke up before you could climax. But you quickly realized it wasn’t just cold in your dream. Your teeth were chattering in real life.
“Fuck. It’s freezing,” you said.
“Power’s out,” Bucky said. “Must be the storm.”
“Can we make a fire?”
“I checked. The stove is electric.”
“Are you sure? That thing looks older than you.”
Bucky laughed. “I think I saw a few candles in the cupboard.” He got up and rummaged around in the kitchen. He lit them and placed them around the room.
“Bring one here. Maybe I can warm my hands.”
He laughed as he flopped back onto his side of the bed. “I know it’s cold in here. With the blizzard, there’s no way we’ll make it down the mountain. In the morning, we can—”
“I’m not gonna make it to morning! Feel my fingers!”
Bucky outstretched his right hand toward you, smiling in amusement at what he assumed was exaggeration. When you touched him, his expression changed to one of concern. Maybe things were worse than you thought. Maybe it really was frostbite. Bucky started taking down the pillow barrier.
“What are you doing?” you asked.
“You’re right,” he said as he threw pillows over his shoulder and onto the floor.
“Oooh, say that again.”
He laughed. “It’s too cold in here. You need body heat.”
You rolled your eyes but he kept moving pillows. “You’re serious?”
He nodded as he got rid of the last pillow. He awkwardly opened his arms. You scooted closer to him. This wasn’t how you wanted his arms around you, but you were too cold to deny him. He wrapped his big, strong arms around you. You relaxed into his embrace, and not just because of the warmth. He held you tight to him and you would’ve stayed just like forever, but you were still shivering. It felt like the chill had settled into your bones. The extra warmth from Bucky was only making it more obvious just how cold it was in the tiny cabin.
“We need skin to skin,” Bucky said.
You laughed but he didn’t.
“Take your clothes off. Right now,” he said.
Maybe the frigid air was impacting your decision-making, because instead of denying him, you complied. Tried to, anyway. Your fingers were so numb from the cold that you fumbled with the hem of your shirt. He gently nudged your fingers aside and helped you out of your shirt. You’d imagined the first time he took your clothes off a little differently, but you couldn’t care about that now. Once your shirt was off, he took his off too.
He hugged you again then. Your bare skin felt electrified where it touched his. He held your hands to his chest to warm them. With his hardened pecs beneath your fingers, it took all of your willpower not to squeeze.
“Is that better?” he asked.
You nodded. You didn’t trust yourself to speak. You stayed like that for a few minutes, afraid to move. Afraid that at some point he’d decide that you were warm enough. You weren’t warm enough. In any sense. You needed him closer for survival, but it became increasingly difficult to tell if you needed him because you were cold or because you were horny.
“You’re not warm enough,” he said finally. You didn’t argue.
When he pulled away, the sudden loss of warmth made your body tense up. He immediately placed his arms around you again.
“I won’t let go of you anymore, okay?”
You hated how pathetic your voice sounded when you responded, “Okay.”
His arm reached between your bodies to pull his pants down. You told yourself that you weren’t going to look, but your eyes had a mind of their own. You watched his fingers grip his waistband and tug down his boxers and his pants. Suddenly he was naked. Even in the dim lighting, you could see how big he was. His eyes went straight to yours to check in, but he found no objection. You looked away to be polite, but felt too awkward to look into his eyes. You turned around so that your back was to his chest. You were grateful that he couldn’t see your face when he started to pull your pants down. If he was hesitant about this plan, his movements didn’t show it. He was smooth and deliberate, quickly ridding you of your pajamas and underwear. When you were both undressed, he pulled you close. When you felt his cock against your ass, you shivered, and it wasn’t because of the freezing temperatures.
“That’s it,” he said. “Turn over.”
He didn’t wait for you to move, effortlessly pulling you onto your back and laying on top of you. Bucky was naked. You were naked. And he was on top of you. You were short of breath just thinking about it.
“Don’t tell me I’m taking your breath away,” he teased.
“You’re heavy,” you retorted. “I think you may need to start laying off the eggrolls.”
As you laughed together, you became hyper aware of how close your bodies were, of just how much physical contact you had. The laughing stopped abruptly.
“Why didn’t you take off my bra?” you whispered. “Afraid that once you see these you’ll be ruined for all other boobs?”
“Yes,” he nodded as he reached under you, large hands rubbing your back and unhooking the clasp. He slowly slid your straps down your arms. He looked into your eyes as he pulled your bra from between your bodies and threw it onto the floor.
Here you were, caged in his warmth, looking deep into his eyes like in one of your fantasies. And yet your instinct was to make a stupid joke, find some way to make this feel less serious. But you couldn’t think straight with his dick resting on your stomach and his warm breath on your face.
“Better?” he asked.
“Eh. Still a little chilly,” you joked breathlessly.
“I can get you warmer,” he said seriously.
You laughed. “I don’t think we could physically be any closer than we are right now.”
He quirked an eyebrow at you. “Well, technically we could be a little closer.”
“Barnes, if I go outside in the morning and find out that you cut the powerlines…”
“I can’t have you dying of hypothermia on my watch. I don’t have to move or anything. Just to keep you warm.”
You wanted to roll your eyes and hit him on the arm, but his sincerity caught you off guard.
“Seriously?”
“Seriously. I’m not a fan of the cold either. I’ve spent too much of my life frozen already. We don’t have to if you don’t want to. I just thought…”
“Okay.”
“Yeah?”
You nodded. “And don’t worry, when I tell Nat this story, I won’t even mention the shrinkage.”
He laughed with you and then shook his head at you.
“What am I gonna do with you?” he asked.
“Stick your dick in me, apparently.”
He swallowed nervously. “Are you…? Are you ready?” he asked.
You nodded, hoping he wouldn’t question how wet you were already. You certainly weren’t going to bring up the fact that you had felt his length slowly hardening against you for the last few minutes.
“I, uh, just gotta…” He reached down to pump himself a few times, looking anywhere but you. You wanted to change that.
“You can look at me, Bucky.”
His eyes found yours. You’d never seen this expression on his face before. He was never this easy to read. Even though he’d beaten the Winter Soldier programming, he usually always kept a part of himself closed off. Those defenses were gone now. In their place was yearning. A desire so deep it was overwhelming. The way he looked at you was the same way you felt about him.
You arched your back, drawing attention to your chest. “You can also look here, if it helps.”
He looked at your breasts for the first time. His mouth fell open in awe. You hoped you really were ruining him for other women. You hoped he would never look at anyone else like this for as long as he lived. His eyes went from your chest back to your face as he shifted between your legs. You bit your lip when you felt the head of his cock prod your entrance. It would take everything in your power not to moan. This was probably a very bad idea. But still you let your legs fall open wider to give him easier access.
When he first pushed in, you drew a shaky breath. He stopped moving, eyes anxiously searching yours. He was terrified you’d ask him to stop. Quite the contrary.
“That all you got?” you asked.
He smirked at you before resuming his progress. Despite your earlier joke, you felt your walls stretch around him as he pushed further into you. You felt every single inch, but it was torture not being able to wrap your legs around his hips or claw at his back like you wanted to.
When he was fully seated, he stilled. You took a few deep breaths. It was dizzying, being this close to him, this full of him. It was his turn to tell you, “You can look at me, ya know.”
You looked at him in the flickering candlelight. His hair obscured your view of his face. You reached up and tucked it behind his ear. He nuzzled his face against your hand. Your heart skipped a beat. You could feel his warm cock throbbing inside of you. He was looking at you so romantically that you forgot where you were for a moment. Your body did, too. Your pussy clenched around him. You didn’t get a chance to wonder if he’d felt it. You heard him groan. Right before you felt him thrust.
His eyes darted to you, panicked. You’d seen him panic once before, as he pulled you out of the ice in Finland. That day he’d warmed you up by the fire with plenty of hot drinks and some light teasing. You preferred the current method of warming you up. Which is why you let him hear you. You moaned for him. If you’d been less desperate for him to fuck you, you would’ve been embarassed by how needy you sounded. It was nothing compared to the strangled cry Bucky let out with his second thrust. You expected him to keep moving, but he stopped again. He leaned in, eyes urgent.
“The first time I saw you,” he panted, “I knew you were the most beautiful woman I’d ever—”
Your heart fluttered, but you couldn’t have him saying things he didn’t mean. “You don’t have to flatter me, Buck—”
“It’s not flattery if it’s true. And you are so beautiful.”
You placed your hands behind his head and pulled him in for a kiss. You weren’t sure what it was going to be like, your first kiss with Bucky. Especially since that first kiss was occurring after he was already inside of you. When your lips touched, you both sighed with relief. His lips were soft. You weren’t expecting that. His tongue probed your lips gently, and you gladly gave it access. He kissed you slowly, like he was savoring every second. He cupped your breast with his right hand, softly stroking it. His touches were almost reverent. It would’ve been romantic if you weren’t so needy. There’d be time for slow and steady. You hoped so, anyway. Right now you needed fire. You needed his touch to chase away the cold.
“Are you holding back on me, Barnes? Don’t.”
That was all the encouragement he needed. He bent his head and attached his lips to your neck. He pulled the delicate flesh between his teeth as the hand on your breast eagerly squeezed. His metal hand tightened its grip on your hip. Maybe, if you were lucky, you’d have a bruise in the shape of his handprint tomorrow. Proof that this had actually happened. Proof it wasn’t just the best dream of your life.
Maybe you wanted to mark him, too. Maybe that’s why you tangled your fingers in his hair while you raked the nails of the other hand down his back. He grunted as he drove into you with renewed force, the headboard rattling against the wall.
“Fuck,” he whispered. “You’re so wet. So tight. So perfect. Even better than I—” he stopped himself.
“Better than you imagined?” you suggested.
He nodded.
“You imagine me?” you asked, breathless.
“Every day,” he confessed.
You moved your hips in time with his next stroke, taking him deeper than ever. You both cursed. With each thrust, you knew things would never be the same. With each thrust, you got more and more desperate for him to ruin you. You writhed desperately under him and he only gripped you tighter, forcing you to stay still and accept your pleasure like a good girl. He angled his hips so that he was massaging your g-spot with every thrust. The head of his cock dragged against your center of pleasure over and over again in a relentless pursuit for your climax. You wanted to beg him to fuck you harder and faster but you didn’t want this to end yet. Not until he was as ruined as you were.
You took your hands away from him and brought them to your chest. You gripped your breasts tightly and moaned. He was mesmerized. You pinched your nipples and rolled your hips, putting on a show for him. You needed to know that he would never forget this. That he would never forget you. You tugged on your nipples and cried his name.
“That’s my job,” he said. You smirked at him.
You put your fingers in his open mouth and brought them to your clit and started rubbing slow circles. You watched his eyes darken. He grabbed your hand and brought it to his mouth again, closing his eyes in pleasure as he licked your fingers clean. Instead of putting your hand back where he found it, he brought his metal fingers to your clit instead, taking over your ministrations there. The cold, hard metal rhythmically massaged the sensitive bundle of nerves until his name was the only word in your vocabulary.
You wouldn’t last much longer. You’d see to it that neither would he. You attached your lips to his neck and sucked a bruise into the skin. His fingers on your clit went from slow circles to frantic figure 8s. Your back arched in pleasure as you felt your walls tighten around Bucky’s cock. His hips stuttered as he flooded you with warmth. Your legs shook when you felt him fill you. You whimpered his name. He whispered yours. Before you could even catch your breath, it happened.
You both knew the second the power turned back on. The hum of the fridge, the rattle of the old radiator, the red “Off” light on the coffee pot. It was like a bomb going off in the bubble you’d built. You looked at each other, startled, as if you were just realizing the extent of what you had done. For a split second, you considered pulling away from him and getting dressed, pretending none of this had ever happened. But you didn’t want that, not while his cum was still warm inside you and aftershocks of your orgasm were still rocking your core. You two spoke at the same time.
“It’ll probably take a while before you’re warm eno—”
“The power could go off again at any mo—”
“Sorry—”
“What were you saying—”
You both chuckled self-consciously.
“You love being inside me, don’t you, Barnes?” you teased with no taunting in your voice. You felt his dick twitch. You rolled your hips. “Is that a yes?”
He bit his lip and looked at you with more than lust. It was devotion.
“Yes,” he said finally.
“Good. Because you’re the only one that can keep me warm.”
“What about me?” he asked.
You looked at him, perplexed.
“I get cold, too.”
“What can I warm up for you, Bucky?”
“My ears are kinda cold,” he said.
Oh. Not exactly what you were thinking about warming up, but ok. You reached out to stroke the side of his face. He smiled and blushed, but nuzzled into your hand.
“Your thighs should be pretty warm now…”
Oh. Your thighs could keep his ears warm. You would happily straddle his face in the name of reciprocity. It was the least you could do, right?
The next morning, you woke up wrapped in Bucky’s arms. The heat hadn’t gone out again during the night, but you still felt like you needed Bucky’s warmth.
“I didn’t tamper with the generator,” Bucky said. “But I should have. I should’ve warmed you up like that when you fell into the lake.”
“Why didn’t you?”
“Would you have let me?”
You nodded.
“You would have?!”
“I bought the Kirby bonnet for you,” you confessed.
“What?”
“I know how much you like playing Mario Kart with Sam. I thought you’d like it. I thought maybe it’d make you like me.”
He scoffed. “Are you kidding? By that point, I was already in lo—I mean, I, uh. I really do love Mario Kart, you’re right.”
“Nice save.”
“Let me take you out on a proper date.”
“One condition.”
“Anything.”
“Has to be somewhere warm.”
You shared a laugh.
“Where’s the fun in that?” he smirked.
Want to read more of my writing? Check out my ongoing Stucky x Reader series.
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a-hazbin-reader · 4 months
Note
Hiii! Your headcanons and memes are absolutely funny, I think this request fits you.
So instead of dog or cat (Husker) Wife reader saw her Husband walking around with the egg boys, and she pulls out the '🥺can we keep one?' and would like ABSOLUTELY not take no for an answer, she even pulls out a new dress for the egg boi to differentiate him from the other eggs.
I loved those goofy eggs so much 😭
Alastor X Reader Headcanons
✅️Romantic
❌️Platonic
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TW: Alastor being a jealous husband, Alastor being possessive of wife!reader's attention
Description: ☝️⬆️
Okay, so it's bad enough that Alastor is stuck dealing with the eggs and he's not even allowed to crack a few of them
And he's totally not annoyed with the way your eyes lit up, and you immediately started cooing over them the moment you saw them
Of course the clumsy little things just ate it up, flexing and showing off for you, even going so far as to climb into your outstretched arms
So now they're stealing his wife from him? Those eggs have crossed a line
He skipped breakfast for this?
Alastor knows he needs to keep them away from you to keep you from getting more attached than you already are
So at the sacrifice of his own needs for your attention, Alastor makes sure to keep the eggs far away from you by keeping them close to him
Even at the cost of his sanity
Alastor hadn't even realized he left one of them behind until he came back to the hotel to find you holding one like a baby
And the little imbecile is just soaking up the attention too, blissfully unaware of the error he just made
Not even Sir Pentious can get the egg to willingly leave your embrace, the little thing stubbornly clinging to you
"No! You can't sssstay with her! You're my little egg! My minion!"
It takes much coaxing from you to get the egg to leave your side but that's far from the end of it
Every morning afterwards the egg is bursting into the bedroom and crawling into bed with the two of you
Instead of waking up to your sleepy affection, Alastor is waking up to that stupid egg babbling off to you about everything and anything
Not him shoving the egg boy off the bed and tugging you against him
Alastor eats nothing but eggs for breakfasts for the next week, there's something therapeutic about cracking them that he just can't quite put his finger on
Oh wait-yes he can
He hopes that you'll get sick of the egg boy eventually, but then you start dressing the egg up, differentiating it from the others
"Alastor look! Doesn't he look darling? He's a mini you~!"
You don't notice your husband's eye twitching
You baby that egg more than you've ever babied him and he's definitely getting jealous
He just about snaps when he hears you and Sir Pentious talking about you keeping the little egg
"Aren't you a little old for those 'egg baby' projects, my dear? You're not in school anymore."
"Oh, please, Alastor! Can't we keep him? He's already so attached to me and I just adore him! I've already named him!"
"Um...Y/N...they already have namesssss..."
"I do?"
Somehow, he manages to convince you that you don't need to keep the egg but it's by the skin of his teeth
And it doesn't stop you from spending every waking moment spoiling the egg
That should be him being spoiled by you
He starts trying to intimidate the egg whenever you aren't around but the little thing is too dense to understand it
"I wouldn't follow Y/N so closely up those stairs, one wrong step and it would be quite the nasty fall for someone as fragile as you."
"Thanks Boss!"
Not Alastor trying to crack him whenever you look away
Purposefully opening doors a little too hard in hopes that your egg is on the other side
Using his staff to nudge him out an open window...
Finding extremely dangerous tasks for the egg to do only to be disappointed when he comes back unharmed
Developing a sudden interest in baking extremely large cakes
Alastor, honey, come on...that last one wasn't even subtle
Bottom line, if you care about the egg boy then you better give him back to Sir Pentious because he won't be safe around your husband
It's an emotional goodbye but Alastor's happiness at having your attention again is worth it
It's not like you won't still see each other around the hotel, chill
He's a terribly needy man when it comes to your attention but it's just part of his charm
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I LOVE THESE LITTLE GUYS
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slttygeto · 10 months
Text
SHAMELESS | TOJI & SHIU
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જ⁀➴ synopsis: Toji isn't that big on sharing, but he can give Shiu a pass just for the sake of your pleasure.
જ⁀➴ content warning: fem!reader, pwp (i mean, the plot is barely there), established relationship w toji, he and shiu fucked you the previous night, cunnilingus, fingering fucking, multiple orgasms, dirty talk.
જ⁀➴ word count: 1,9k
ʚ⁺˖↪ comments and reblogs are greatly appreciated!
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You never had a problem with Toji spending the night over at your place. In fact, you thought it was pretty cute when he woke up, rubbing the sleep from his eyes before asking you what was for breakfast. Except this time, it wasn’t just Toji in your kitchen. You glance to the side as you finish serving the scrambled eggs on three plates and there’s a blush on your face when you see a freshly showered Shiu drying his hair, grinning from ear to ear.
“Hey, I’m still here,” you let out a squeal when you feel Toji’s rough hands grab at your hips, sitting you down on his lap before wrapping a possessive arm around your waist.
“Toji—be careful, the pan is hot!” You try to get off his lap but his hold only tightens around your body. You don’t have to look at him to know that he’s glaring at Shiu, the man who decided to join you and Toji on a little night of fun.
“Easy on her, Fushiguro. That’s where my hands were last night, I’m pretty sure there’s bruises there.” Shiu knows exactly how to rile up Toji, and he only scoffs in response before lifting up your shirt to check for himself.
“What are you—“
“You weren’t so shy last night when you squirted on him,” Toji’s eyes are sharp, but the way he was holding your shirt made you relax against his touch. “Let me see.” And you do, you let him lift up your shirt to see the love bites and very subtle hand prints on your hips, waist and thighs. You feel a little exposed as Shiu takes a seat facing you both, thanking you for the meal as though your boyfriend wasn’t just stripping you naked in front of him.
“You asshole,” your boyfriend grumbled. “I told you to be careful with her.”
“But she seemed to like it,” Shiu raises his head to stare at you, and you feel your heart get stuck in your throat. “Didn’t you, sweetheart?” You nod in response, and try to slip away from Toji’s hold and manage to succeed since the man seemed to be focused on the food in front of him.
You place the pan in the sink, and turn around to take a seat next to Toji. You’re about to eat, you pour orange juice for yourself, and there’s a rather comfortable silence in the kitchen. That is until your boyfriend decides to break it.
“Any thoughts about last night?” His question didn’t really catch you off guard, you were expecting one of them to bring it up but you were hoping for it to be Toji, just in case. You don’t look up from your food as you nod at him, grabbing the glass of orange juice.
“What did you like exactly?” Oh? He wanted details? You feel yourself flush at the question. You’ve never gone into detail about what you liked during sex unless it was to learn with Toji about each other’s bodies. But now that you had another man—one that made you see stars last night, sitting right across from you with a proud smirk painting his features, you find yourself shifting on your seat.
“I liked…uh, when you both ate me out.” You manage to choke out the sentence, cheeks flaring up when you realize exactly what you just said. Toji senses your shyness and grabs you from your seat to place you on his lap again.
“Why is that? Is there something else you liked?” His rough fingers are gripping your thighs, and you can tell he’s trying to force them open but you let him anyway and he smirks. So you knew where this was going.
“You both ate me out… differently,” it was true. While Toji was the type to abuse your clit with licks and overstimulate you until you saw stars, Shiu teased at the bud until you had tears streaming down your face. He would suck then pull away, then suck again and repeat the motion—and when you did reach your orgasm, you had to hold onto the bed sheets and gasp for air. Seeing Shiu make you cum this hard made Toji grab you immediately to fuck your brains out, forcing the man who previously made you cum to fist his cock while you cried and clawed at Toji’s back.
“And?” Toji’s hand slips inside your panties and your breath hitches. Your hand holds onto his forearm and your head rests on his shoulder as you sigh.
“Baby-“
“And?” He presses, feeling his finger trace over your clit ever so slightly and you moan before nodding.
“And—fuck, when you both fucked me at the same time-“ You don’t finish your sentence as Toji starts rubbing your clit in soft, slow circles. You’re still sensitive from the previous night, and you’re embarrassed to admit that you might cum so quickly.
“Oh yeah?” It’s Shiu’s turn to talk, and you stare up at him with those pretty eyes that widen his grin. “Told you she liked it, Fushiguro. She likes to be stuffed,” the tone he was using with you makes you whimper, and you try to bury your face in Toji’s chest.
“My baby, my dirty girl- one big man isn’t enough for you? You need two to feel satisfied?” Toji says against your hair, his finger rubbing your clit faster. You’re whining against him when he starts rubbing your clit using the palm of his hand, and you grind your hips at the same rhythm.
“Answer him, sweetheart.” You’re brought out of your haze at Shiu’s voice, and mid gasping for air and gripping Toji’s arm, you manage to utter out a few words.
“Yeah-fuck, yeah I do. Two big—you two are big,” your flushes when you hear both Toji and Shiu chuckle at your words, so fucked out that you were openly admitting that you enjoyed being split open on their cocks.
“Is that so?” Toji kisses your ear, watching as you squirmed from the contact. He let you grind yourself desperately against the palm of his hand before eyeing Shiu.
You could feel yourself get closer, you were gasping and moaning and it was all so good. Your boyfriend helps you by kissing your neck, whispering a few praise words, telling you how fucking pretty you looked fucking yourself on his hand. But Toji was cruel, and you should’ve kept that in mind.
He wasn’t going to give you what you wanted unless he felt like it, and so when he pulls his hand away from your pussy and robs you from your orgasm, you let out a pathetic sob. Your hips buck up and stutter, and you’re wailing in protest.
“Toji! Toji- was so close, why-“ Your boyfriend roughly grabs your jaw, ignoring the tears glossing your eyes. He kisses your forehead and grins before making you look forward and your breath gets caught in your throat.
Shiu was on his knees, with both of his hands resting on your thighs. You look back at Toji, then at the man kneeling in front of you and whimper when you feel his finger trace the outline of your pussy through your panties.
“She’s desperate.”
“She’s sensitive,” Toji warns the other man who only chuckles in response. He taps your butt and tells you to lift up yourself a little, taking off your underwear before putting it in his pants and your boyfriend glares at him.
“You better give that back.”
“I’m about to eat your girlfriend out, and you care about that?” One of Toji’s arms wraps around your waist while his free hand grips your thigh. It’s a silent and subtle reminder that you were his, he was yours and Shiu pleasuring you didn’t change that. You are once again trapped between two big men, same as last night. And Shiu chuckles when he sees your swollen clit twitch a little.
“Poor thing, Toji is so mean, hm?” You sniffle and nod, and he chuckles lightly at how desperate you are to cum.
“Don’t worry pretty thing, won’t tease you like he did.” And sure enough, he was parting your pussy lips and diving in with his tongue first. He kisses at your sensitive clit, licking and brushing his lips against the bud while you squirm in Toji’s hold.
“Don’t push it.” Toji sent yet another warning glare his way, but it quickly dissolved into a soft look when you cry out his name even though there’s another man eating you out.
“What is it baby, hm?” His big hand lets go of your thigh to grab your face. He tilts it so that you can stare at him, and he coos at the fucked out look on your face. You were gone, and your boyfriend found it so endearing and so hot. He would never admit it, but sharing you with Shiu was better than doing so with any other man.
There are slurping noises coming from between your legs and your lips part, eyebrows pinching. You try to look down at Shiu despite Toji’s strong grip on your face, wanting to look at the man who was about to give you an earth shattering orgasm. Shiu sees your attempt and smacks your boyfriend’s thigh. Instead of protesting and telling him to fuck off, they lock eyes and unbeknownst to you come up with a plan.
“You’re so spoiled,” before you could even ask what Toji meant by this, his hand releases your face and grabs the back of your thigh. He tells you to be good and hold it there while he slips his hand underneath. You feel his fingers trace your folds, and your eyes roll to the back of your head when you feel him push two thick fingers inside you.
“There it is,” Toji laughs. “Fuck, you’re so dirty, this is exactly what you wanted, yeah?” You can’t respond—they have officially fucked you stupid. The combination of Shiu’s mouth on your clit and Toji’s fingers curling up inside you makes you cum embarrassingly fast.
You tremble in your boyfriend’s hold, jaw going slack when neither men want to stop or pull away. Your hands try to push away Shiu’s head and Toji’s head, but to no avail.
“I can’t—Toji!” You cry out when you feel him nip at your neck, the squelching sound of his fingers going in and pushes you again towards another orgasm.
“Yes you can, come on baby girl—come on,” he whispers in your ear, peppering a few kisses there and it seems to be the one thing that pushes you over the edge. You cum around his fingers and hard. You are gasping for air, holding onto his forearm while your hips continue to shake stutter. Shiu has to pepper a few kisses on your inner thighs and stomach, whispering against your skin.
“Calm down, there you go,” you feel spoiled, like a princess. Your forehead is sweaty and your hair is sticking to it. You hiss when Shiu presses another loving kiss to your clit and squirm on Toji’s lap.
“Easy on her.” Toji warns the man again before taking the fingers that were inside you and licking them clean. You blush at the gesture and look away from him, as if he didn’t just finger fuck you within an inch of your life.
“Let me have her.” Shiu tells your boyfriend who raises a questioning eyebrow.
“What?”
“The shower. It’s my turn to fuck her there.” You feel the butterflies in your stomach, and Shiu chuckles when he sees the eager look on your face.
“See? Even she is excited.”
“Okay, but you only have twenty minutes.” Shiu chuckles at this, sending you a knowing look.
“We both know that’s more than enough for both of us, right sweetheart?”
Fuck. You were truly in heaven.
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ʚ⁺˖↪ GIRL DINNNERRRR GIRL DINNEEEERRRR also im so annoyed i couldnt find a proper panel of them both together. so ignore the annoying header.
2023 ; all works belong to @ slttygeto. do not repost my works on any other platofrm.
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