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sixofpomegranates · 2 years

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☠︎ 𝙲𝚘𝚖𝚏𝚘𝚛𝚝 ☠︎ — 𝙴. 𝙼.

Request: Could we maybe have an entire oneshot around the reader being on her period with Eddie being the sweetheart he is? He’s such a golden retriever! In the one shot maybe the reader could be more on the shy side (idk why but I love the Shy!readerXExtroverted!Character trope) and she’s on it but doesn’t want to say anything because (idk why you can pick the reason) but Eddie kinda has to dig it out of her. Thank youuuu!!!

Pairing: Eddie Munson x Shy!Fem!Reader !Body, Ethnicity & Skin color Neutral!

A/N: Insert your favorite fix-it fic for S4 here. I have extreme period pains so I dedicate this to every person with a uterus that struggles with it as well. May this give you a little bit of comfort.

CW: Fluff, Comfort | No use of [y/n] | Mentions of Uninvolved/Neglectful father (Reader), Painkiller use, Extreme Period Pain (blood, acne, pain, insecurity, vomiting — the whole nine yards), Consumption of Food, Nicknames, Eddie being supportive, Jason has a tiny dick (I will not elaborate.)

Resting my head against my cold locker door, I take a couple of deep breaths. I feel dizzy, sick to my stomach, and am in pain.

My period decided on a surprise visit last night, and yes, it is actually worse when you don't expect the pain to hit you like a van and wake up pained and in a puddle of your own blood.

Rest in peace, my cute cream-colored sweats.

I just wanna crawl into bed and sleep, but like my father said: "You can stay at home once you actually have something."

He doesn't like talking or caring about "girl problems"; never has. Therefore, I'm in school, and my uterus feels like it's being punctured with needles. I could really use a hug right now, but I feel that if I'd receive one, I'd break down into tears.

Only a couple of hours. Math, Chemistry, English, History... I can do it. I feel sick to my stomach, but I can handle it.

"Hey, Sweetheart."

I quickly look to my side. Eddie stands there – no, leans there – his head resting against Robin's locker while he grins at me. I try not to look too flustered by the nickname he just doesn't stop using for me.

"Hi, Eddie," I answer, forcing myself to grin while grabbing my math books.

Eddie was in the Upside Down with us, was shortly accused of being a cult leader, and kind of became a part of our friend group since Hawkins's "earthquake".

"You okay?" he asks.

I quickly nod. I will most definitely not tell him about my cramps. That would be too much information, and like my dad says: "Men don't care for your girly pains. It's grossing them out."

I already struggle enough with my stuttering and attempts to get comfortable around Eddie. I was never good at making friends; it just takes me ages to act like a real human being, not an alien.

I don't want him to think of me as gross... I really, really like him, which isn't coming from nothing! He's so pretty, and nice, and loud... He's way more extroverted than I'll ever be.

"You sure?" he asks again, raising his brows. "Noticed Harrington didn't drive you today. He always drives you and Robin."

'Yeah, I had to take the bus because I spent too much time crying and beginning my dad to let me stay at home,' I want to say. Instead, I say, "Yeah, overslept."

Scratching the back of his head, Eddie grins, "Oh, okay. It just had me worried you wouldn't come today...."

Feeling heat rising to my face and forgetting that I'm in excruciating pain for a solid minute, I smile back at him. "Well, I'm here," I announce awkwardly, making him chuckle.

"Yeah, you are." He looks at the books in my hand, quickly grabbing them from my grasp. "Let me carry them for you," he says cooly. "You have math with Brown, right?"

I quickly close my locker and walk after him. "Yeah. Thanks," I almost whisper.

He is definitely unaware of how boyfriend-y it is to carry a girl's books. I've never seen guys do it unless it's for their girlfriends. I never had a boy carry my books, especially not one that has me falling for him every time he looks at me, so I guess I'm not complaining.

In front of my class, he hands me my books back. "Well, here we are. I'll be seeing you at lunch?"

I nod. "Yeah. Thank you, Eddie."

He winks at me. "No problem, Sweetheart."

Then he walks away, and I feel like grinning like crazy and kicking my feet – of course, I don't do it, but I definitely feel like doing it.

I quickly walk inside and sit down beside Robin.

"Wow, you're all giggly," she notes, looking at me.

"Eddie carried my books for me," I tell her, flinching as my left breast touches the desk, and it feels like my nipple is about to fall off.

Happiness over; I'm in pain again.

Ironic how god decided that bleeding out of your vagina and having that hurt like shit just isn't enough. Breakouts, nipples hurt, I feel like throwing up, my back hurts, I constantly fear bleeding through my clothes without noticing, the emotional rollercoaster I didn't ask to be on, tension headaches... and when life really hates you, you also have diarrhea and flatulence. Being a woman can suck so badly.

But as Dad says: "This isn't a real pain. You're just being a crybaby. Millions of women go through that all the time, and none of them cries around as you do."

Robin cocks her head. "Are you okay? Steve said you called him, saying you wouldn't come today."

I nod, whispering, "Period."

She lets out a small "Oh."

Before we can talk more, Mr. Brown comes in and tortures us with mathematical equations.

*****

The hours pass, the classes change, and I start to feel worse and worse.

Shortly before my History test, I finally break. The pain is too much to walk, and it's making me so sick. I rush to the girls' bathroom and throw up – or better say, dry heave since I haven't eaten all day.

I quietly ugly cry, ruining my perfect mask of make-up, and just sit there, pulling my knees to my chest. I'll just stay here until my classes are over.

After thirty minutes, there's a knock on my stall's door.

"Occupied," I whimper.

On the other side, a very familiar chuckle chimes. "No shit, Sweetheart."

"Eddie?" I ask, shocked. "W-What are you doing here? This is the girls' room. You could get in trouble."

"I was looking for you," he says, and an already broken-in box of tampons and a candy bar get shoved through the small gap between the toilette stall's door and the floor. "Robin was worried, but you know she sucks at history, so she had to go take the test. I was checking all the girls' rooms for you."

A mortified squeak escapes me. "Why- Where..." I stammer, looking at the box of tampons.

"They're super useful when a jock's punching you in the face, and your nose doesn't stop bleeding."

A small giggle escapes me at the thought of Eddie with tampons shoved up his nose.

"Is it bad?" the metalhead asks as I hear him sit down on the floor and lean against my door.

"Very," I admit, wiping away my tears.

"Why didn't you stay at home, sweet girl?" Eddie asks, cackling. "Couldn't you go even one day without seeing me?"

I chuckle weakly. "My dad doesn't let me stay at home for something so small...."

He sighs. "I mean, I know school's important and shit... but it's not like you're learning much when trying not to pass out from the pain."

"I'm okay," I assure him, but he sees right through me.

"You're not one to play hooky, especially not when you have a test."

"I- I just needed a break," I lie, biting the inside of my cheeks as I note that I actually also desperately need to pee. "I'm better now. I'll be out and back in class in a few. You don't have to stay."

"I don't mind waiting till you're better."

Okay, he's so nice, but he'll kill me here. Intricate social interactions and talking about embarrassing things just both don't work for me.

"Eddie, I- I- I-" I stammer.

He chuckles, softly mocking me, "You. You. You. What is it, Sweetheart?"

"I need to pee," I tell him quickly, glad I can't see his face.

"Well, thankfully, we're in the bathroom," he jokes.

"I- I can't go when you're in here."

"What about the whole 'Girls always go to the bathroom together'?"

"You're not a girl, though. That- That's a completely different situation."

"Yeah, this is sexist," he complains, appalled, but silly giggles come through. "I am a feminist, and I demand to be treated equally. Now pee."

"Eddie," I exclaim. "I- It's just the two of us in here, and I'll die of embarrassment if you hear me pee."

"Wait," he says, confused. "Girls actually worry about shit like that?"

"Yes, it's embarrassing," I tell him. "Now, please, Eddie. If I'm gonna pee myself, I will flunk myself off the school's roof."

I hear him get up and turn on the faucets of every sink in the bathroom.

"Here you go. Middle ground," he announces.

"Why in the world are you so stubborn about this?" I ask, getting up and opening the button of my jeans.

"If I go outside, I risk getting caught skipping biology."

"Y-You're skipping class right now?" I ask over the loud sounds of water, sitting down on the toilet.

"Yeah. I was worried after Robin ran around like a headless chicken looking for you."

I laugh quietly, feeling my face heat up. He was worried about me.

Changing my tampon and looking at my pulled-down panties, I start cursing, although I rarely have the urge to do so. "Fuck. Shit. God-fucking-dammit."

"Oh, big girl words," Eddie chuckles. "You okay in there?"

"No. No, not at all," I hiss back at him, desperately trying to soak up some of the blood that drenches my panties and has already created a stain in my jeans.

Tears are already running down my cheeks again. This is a nightmare. I can't go out like that.

"Sweetheart," Eddie says sternly, knocking against the stall's door. "Talk to me. What's up?"

"Y-You have to promise not to laugh," I sob.

"Hey, baby, why are you crying?" he quickly asks.

"I- I bled through my panties and pants."

He is quiet for a second, letting embarrassment eat me alive. Then he asks, "Okay, uhm... Just cause, like, I'm completely out of my comfort zone here: What are we gonna do about that?"

"I don't know," I cry, sobbing louder than before.

"Hey, hey, hey, hey," Eddie coos from the other side. "Please don't cry. It's not that bad. I- Uhm, do you have your PE stuff in your locker?"

I shake my head, although I know he can't see it. "No. I took it home with me after class yesterday."

I see him walking up and down the bathroom through the gap between my stall's door and the floor.

"Okay. Okay, Sweetheart? I have an idea," he says suddenly. "Just- Just stay here, kay?"

"Where the fuck am I supposed to go looking like I sat in a crime scene, Eddie?" I ask, laughing through my sobs.

He chuckles. "Yeah, right. Sorry. I'll be right back."

I hear him leave, white sneakers squeaking on the linoleum floors of our school. He returns just as loudly, the chain on his belt and his quick steps announcing him before he's even in the girls' bathroom.

"Here," he announces, shoving a black duffle bag with patches and buttons on it through the toilette stall's gap.

I open it and am met with his PE clothes: a washed-out Black Sabbath shirt and oversized, black sweatpants. Next to them, there's a plastic bag with training shoes.

"They are- I don't go to PE a lot," he tells me quickly. "Not a big fan of getting beaten up because I can't help but laugh at Jason's ridiculously small dick."

After giving them a – just in case – sniff test, I clean myself as good as humanly possible and put on his sweatpants. Taking his shoes out of the plastic bag and just putting them into the duffle bag, I put my jeans and panties into the plastic one.

I come out of the stall, Eddie sitting on the sink counters.

"Hey, sweet girl. Looking good," he tells me gently, jumping off the counter, grabbing some paper towels, and wetting them in the sink.

I am still sobbing a little. Even more, now that I see my ruined make-up. I'm not looking good. I look like a panda. Taking my cheeks into his hands, Eddie begins cleaning up the dark mascara lines running down my face.

"Want me to take you home?" he asks while throwing away the paper towel.

I shake my head. "Dad would kill me."

Eddie sighs. "That man makes it very hard for me not to hate him," he says, clenching his jaw. I sob in an agreeing manner, and he wraps his arms around me, giving me a warm, firm hug... and like I've known all day, I start crying even more.

I wrap my arms around Eddie's waist and bury my now makeup-less face in his chest. We've never hugged before. I am usually not that touchy with people I don't know for that long. But hell, I will definitely not let go of Eddie now.

He started it, and I don't think he's aware of what he just did to himself.

As he presses a kiss on top of my head, my knees buckle.

He could at least try not to be so dreamy! It's not like my introverted self will ever have the guts to make a move on him.

"I'm gonna take you home, okay? Let you take a shower and have a nap."

I look up at Eddie. "I can't go home. My dad will lose it."

He cups my face in his ringed hands, bringing it close to his. "Daddy Dearest won't find out. I'll take you home to my place. That's okay with you, yeah, Sweetheart?"

I nod, enchanted by his soft words. Nobody ever spoke to me this gently before. He smiles and presses a kiss on my forehead. Taking my hand and his duffle bag, he leads me out of the girls' bathroom and to his van.

*****

As we arrive at the Munson trailer, I feel like shit once more. Sure, I stopped crying, but now I am in excruciating pain again. I can't even decide what hurts more: Uterus, back, or nipples?

At the door, Eddie signs to me to be quiet, reminding me that his uncle sleeps in the living room. I nod, not wanting to get caught skipping school.

In his bedroom, Eddie grabs a big, soft sweatshirt and a new pair of sweats for me.

"All right, give me the bag," he tells me, and I instinctively clutch it to my chest, shaking my head.

"Sweetheart, I'm just gonna put it in the wash."

I shake my head again. "No thanks. Can't get the stains out anyway."

He shrugs. "Hey, worst case, we'll dye your little panties and jeans black."

"You know how to do that?"

"Sure. I have like seven shirts that used to be a different color. Everything that's not black is, for some reason, magically attracting stains. Some weird witchcraft shit."

I giggle and almost hand him the bag. But then logic hits me again. "They're full of blood."

Titling his head and squinting at me, Eddie says, "That's why I want to wash them?"

"It's gross," I say.

His face doesn't change. "I feel like we're talking past each other."

At this point, I can't even look at Eddie anymore. This is so humiliating. I try not to start crying again, but the embarrassment makes it very hard for me.

"Why don't you just tell me what got you all worried?"

I nod, biting the inside of my cheek. "My dad says that periods are gross and men don't like to have anything to do with them. I don't want you to think I'm gross and stop talking to me. That would suck really, really bad."

I finally dare to look at him again, watching his face slowly contort into a big, Cheshire-cat-like smile.

"Shit," Eddie chuckles. "You're so cute."

"What?"

"Listen, yes, it's gross – kinda – like, who likes blood? As metal as it is, it's gross. Right? Nosebleed? Blood on your shirt getting all cold and crusty? Fucking awful. Like, ew. But it's not like you chose to be in pain and bleeding. It's natural – Way more natural, by the way, than having a nosebleed because you laughed at Jason Carver's small dick, and he punched you in the face."

Looking at Eddie's cheeky grin, I say, "You're telling that story so often, I can't tell anymore if it's a bit or it actually happened."

"What I wanted to say is, it's gross – like most natural things. Our bodies are pretty gross when you think about it. You didn't choose to go through this, it's painful for you, and I like you, so helping you wherever I can is the least I can do. I'm also pretty tough, can handle seeing some blood. So fuck the drama and just let me wash it, kay? No need for embarrassment."

I hesitantly hand him the plastic bag, and he wraps an arm around me again. "Just so you know, I also think your dad is a fucking asshat. Who talks to their child like that? I bet he never played princess with you, either."

I shake my head. "Not even tea party."

He presses a kiss to my hairline, then removes himself, looking down at me. "It's okay when I do stuff like that, right? I- Just tell me when you don't want me to touch you. I should've asked in the first place. Sorry."

I take a step towards him again. "I'm okay with it."

"You sure?"

I nod, face so hot I feel like melting. "I like it... a lot, actually."

Eddie's cold rings burn on my warm cheek as he gently strokes over it with his knuckles. For a second, it feels like I can't breathe, but I don't fear my breathlessness.

He grins at me, this stupid, boyish grin that causes butterflies in my stomach. "Now go take a shower, and I'll see what I can do about those stains."

He brings me to the small bathroom, then goes the extra steps to the washing machine. I know he said not to be ashamed, but I still cringe as I hear him take out my clothes from the plastic bag.

A deep sigh of relief escapes me as I take off my bra. There simply is no better feeling. I take a quick shower, wash my body and face, and then dress in the clothes Eddie handed me.

I'm still in pain, but I feel pretty comfortable in these soft and baggy clothes. Forcing myself to pull myself together, wearing make-up like a false mask, dressed to impress... I hadn't realized how much it contributed to my discomfort.

I sneak back into Eddie's bedroom. Him following directly after me.

"Here," he whispers over my shoulder, handing me two pills and a glass of water. "Painkillers. Uncle Wayne swears by them when he gets his migraines."

I nod, taking them quickly, drinking half the glass. "Thank you."

He waves me off, pointing at the bed. "Get comfortable, Sweetheart. I'm gonna get you the heating pad."

I get into his bed, glad to see he seems to have recently changed his sheets. I know I am too emotional at this point, but I find myself close to tears as I cuddle myself into the bunch of eclectically mismatched pillows and cover myself with the soft blanket.

Eddie returns, smiling at me gently and sitting down beside me. As he lifts the blanket, he asks, "Back or stomach?"

"Back, please," I mumble.

He nods, placing the heating pad carefully against my body. "No more crying, please," he begs softly, brushing a hand over my head. "The pills' gonna work very soon, promise. It'll get better."

He gets up again, closing his bedroom door. I watch Eddie step out of his sneakers and take off his jacket and vest. With a black hair tie that was previously around his wrist, he makes himself a messy, low man-bun.

"That looks good," I mumble, feeling the painkillers starting to work and, combined with the warmth from the pad, lull me to sleep.

"You think?" he grins.

Nodding, I say before I can stop myself, "You always look good, though."

We look at each other, and I quickly add, "I'm sorry."

Eddie chuckles and grabs a book from one of his cluttered dressers. "You're so cute. Never thought I'd be into a quiet, shy girl... but here we are."

He lays down on the bed, back propped up against the headboard. His words sink in, and I ask, "You're into me?"

He snorts, "Oh no, you're also not good at picking up social clues."

I prop myself up on my elbow. "I- I- I just didn't think you'd-"

Eddie interrupts me laughing, "I was so obvious about my intentions."

"You weren't!" I insist.

This did not fly past my head. No, I would've noticed that Eddie likes me.

Sitting up, he starts to count down things I hadn't counted together at all. "I only call the two most precious things in my life Sweetheart, you and my guitar. Whenever we have classes together, I am so early it starts to seriously hurt my image. I hate when you're not in school because that means I don't get to see you...

"I run after you like a fucking puppy, bring you candy, gifted you that cool rock I found two weeks ago, taught you to play D&D so you have reason to spend more time with me, and I carry your books. I- I gave you a million signs."

The more he talks, the more nervous he gets. Insecure, thinking I didn't see him and his actions as somebody courting me because I didn't want to see.

"I thought I'm not enough- That I'm too... I- I'm so introverted, need a long time to get used to people... This is the first time we're completely alone together," I stammer.

"Because I wanted you to be comfortable around me. I didn't want to push too hard and risk driving you away."

I'd thought Eddie would've forced being alone with me more would he'd been interested... as he didn't, I just assumed he wasn't. And I was never going to have the guts and make a move on him.

Oh, now this makes a lot of sense.

"Oh," I breathe.

"Oh?" he echoes.

I start giggling.

"I have no idea what's going on now," Eddie admits.

"I-" I collect myself, clearing my throat. "I should've picked up on that. I- I just thought you were being nice."

He nods. "Well, yeah? If somebody wants to be your boyfriend, he'll better be fucking nice to you."

Overwhelmed, utterly flustered, I hide my stupid grin behind my hands. "I- Thank you."

"Thank you?" he asks. "For liking you?"

I nod, letting myself fall into the pillows and hiding my face some more.

Eddie follows me and pries my hands from my face, one arm above my head, the other wrapped around me. He just stared into my face, a gentle, happy expression on his face so close to mine.

"You're so perfect," he whispers. "I don't think you have any idea of how down bad I am for you."

"Ditto," I answer quickly before the bravery to do so leaves me.

"Ditto?" he laughs. "Really? That's what you give me after I laid my heart out for you?"

I nod, unable to hide my embarrassed face behind my hands because he grabs them every time I try.

"No hiding from me, Sweetheart," he tells me. "I want to see your everything. Don't care if you think it's good or bad. I'll love it anyway, promise."

I nod again. His words mean so much. I want to tell him something back that mirrors at least half of our shared feelings, but my words die on my tongue.

"Lost for words?" he teases softly.

I want to nod once more, but instead, I bite the bullet and close the distance between us, pressing my lips on his. I feel him tense up in surprise, but within the blink of an eye, he melts into the kiss.

As we pull apart, he chuckles, "Better said than I ever could."

"That was nice," I mumble.

He nods, "Uh-huh."

This time he kisses me, his hand smoothly moving under the blanket and checking if the heating pad is still warm enough.

Breaking the kiss, Eddie rests against the headboard again, pulling me closer so I can rest my head on his chest. "Now take your nap, sweet girl," he tells me, opening his book and starting to read The Hobbit to me.

It only takes moments, and I am out cold. I seem to have needed sleep badly. I only wake up twice, once when Eddie places the freshly heated-up pad against my back and the second time as he puts cozy, woolly socks onto my cold, naked feet.

I wake up when the sun is already down. The bedside table's lamp is turned on, so I won't find myself alone in the dark, and Eddie is gone.

I get out, hearing some slasher on the tv and the stove being used. Eddie's uncle seems to have already left for work. I first go to the bathroom, relieved I didn't create another crime scene between my legs, then I walk into the kitchen.

"Hi," I say to announce myself.

Eddie spins around and smiles at me. "Hey, Sweetheart. Did you sleep well?"

I nod, making him wrap an arm around my waist and pull me close. "I was about to wake you up soon. Just wanted to make dinner first."

I look at the stove with two pots on it. In one is a big portion of macaroni and cheese, on the other is a lid. Nosily, I open it, looking at a black, simmering soup with clothes in it.

Pressing a kiss to my temple, Eddie laughs. He takes the lid from my hand and puts it back onto the mysterious pot. "I told you I'd try dying your clothes first before throwing them out."

"Oh," I reply, giggling. "Was getting worried about your cooking abilities."

"Hey, hey. I may not be able to cook anything fancy, but I am a master at turning canned food into something resembling homemade meals," he tells me. Then he leans closer and whispers, "The secret is using spices and shredded cheese."

"Thank you for letting me in on this secret," I whisper back. Quickly taking the painkiller Eddie hands me with a glass of water.

He nods. "Not keeping any secrets from my girl."

"So, I'm you girl now?" I ask, putting my glass away and watching Eddie take out two bowls and fill them with cheesy noodles.

"You're okay with that, right?" he asks back.

I nod. "More than okay. Like it a lot."

"Perfect," he says, handing me my bowl. "Careful, it's hot."

We sit down on the couch, and he rewinds the movie for me.

While shoving a big spoon of food into his mouth, he asks, "Do you wanna stay the night?"

"Would that be okay?"

He nods. "More than that. Makes it easier to take care of you."

"You don't have to," I tell him, but he shrugs.

"Boyfriend-duty. But so that you know, there'll come the day when I suffer from the flu, and I then expect you to care for me as well."

"For good and for bad, huh?" I ask, realizing I don't need to be embarrassed, secretive, and careful around Eddie. It provides me with a comfort I don't think I ever knew.

"Definitely," he assures me. "Although, I'm not going to marry you just yet. Not that I'm not down for that and being spontaneous, but Uncle Wayne would kill me if I'd get married before I graduate or have a job."

"That's okay," I say, smiling at all the faces he pulls when telling things. "I think I'll like being your girlfriend a lot."

"Hope so," Eddie says. "I like it already. Did you know that you're snoring?"

I look at him with wide eyes. "I do?" I ask, shocked.

He laughs. "Only very, very quiet. But it's so cute."

"That's so embarrassing," I exclaim.

"No, don't be. You were so adorable." He begins mocking my snores, and I hit his arm. "Ouch. Seriously, none of you people can handle even the tiniest bit of teasing without becoming violent!"

I apparently didn't hit him hard enough since he starts mocking my snoring once more.

As I lift my fist to hit him again, he stops me, "Uh-uh. Don't pull a Jason Carver just because you can't handle the jokes."

I lower my arm, surprised. "So, that story is true? He punched you for laughing at his little... you know?"

"His tiny dick? Yeah. Not lying to my girl."

I take another bite from my macaroni and cheese and say, "I wanna hear that story. Like, completely, not just snippets of it."

Eddie nods, a mischievous grin on his face. "Sure, but be warned, the story's very short," he jokes, lifting his pinky.

"No way," I giggle.

He nods. "Yeah. Had the same reaction. But let me set the scene first," Eddie puts his bowl down so he can gesture with his hands. "So, there I was. For some masochistic reason, I decided to go to my PE class. It – actually – wasn't all that bad, and I found out that basketball isn't all that bad either. It's the way society elevates it and its players that is the problem.

"After participating for two hours, I was done being part of society again and really needed a shower. Normally I would just wait till I'm home because... group showers. Don't need jocks staring at my tats or dick. BUT this time, I accidentally did the staring and caught a glimpse of this teeny tiny...."

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seekers-who-are-lovers · 1 year

Text

What might have been lost

Notes: Thank you once again to @flashfictionfridayofficial for the prompt : #FFF196 Against the Flow. This will serve as the beginning chapter of a fan fiction I am thinking of writing about one of the main characters of “Buddy Daddies.” (I don’t think I have encountered a fic about K’s backstory.)

Fandom: Buddy Daddies

Rating: Mature (for good measure, hints of sexual abuse of a teenager and a bit graphic description of rotting corpses)

Pairing: Kazuki Kurusu/male OC, Kazuki Kurusu/Yuzuko Izumi (pre-Kazurei)

Words: 841

As a half-Japanese orphan, there were some things Kazuki Kurusu didn’t want to think about. Left in an orphanage when he was a toddler, he had no memory of his mother and father. No one knew where his parents came from and the reason they didn’t bother to raise him themselves, or if they were still alive or dead. In the Japanese society, bloodlines are the most important thing, therefore, his existence was unwanted, an embarrassment. Yet despite all these bad occurrences, social workers took a liking on him because of the way he made them feel special. Blonde, armed with tea brown eyes, a countenance so bright he was called their little sunshine. He was taught good manners and proper conduct. His half Western features were a blessing. He’d be a beautiful man someday, the same social worker declared as she combed his blonde hair.

“Maintain that positive attitude of yours and take care of your face, Kazu-kun, you’ll go far and wide.”

(Read more under the cut.)

He tried so hard to believe her. By the time he turned 15, he decided to attend a vocational school. Unfortunately, the school fees and supplies cost so much he was forced to work to make ends meet. Any job that could bring in easy money. Anything.

Once he helped an organization cleaning up tiny apartments whose owners were already dead for days or weeks, months, or worse, years, buried in their own belongings. Maggots and flies feasting on their cadavers their faces barely recognizable. The body fluids blending in on the surface where they were found. If their relatives turned up wondering why they were missing was the only time they were remembered. The number of people who was a shut-in increased every single day. It shattered Kazuki’s innocence and vowed he’d never let anyone he cared about the same fate like these unlucky souls.

During those days funds coming from outside sources never poured easily in an institution like the orphanage. It was not hard to fall through the cracks and be persuaded to do something stupid. Treading the path against the flow, he went off the rails so fast, his downfall was imminent. Youth gangs after youth gangs, he realised that his life was aimless. From petty thievery (stealing bikes) to repeated burglary (many apartment owners left their doors open), it was either him hiding from everyone or serving his prison time, or worse, he’d be dead by hanging already.

One day, he met one of the few people who would change his life. Amusing that there were not a lot of them, but Hideyoshi, a 30-year-old computer engineer, took him under his wing. He taught him computers and programming, and other endless ways to go around with it. Apart from having an average knowledge about firearms, proficiency in hand-to-hand combat courtesy of his time on the streets, he added the power of IT among his talents.

Hideyoshi provided him a quarter to live in too, fed him, even taught him how to dress himself up. But there was also a downside to all of it.

Kazuki was almost 18. A buildup of acne had spared him unlike some of his contemporaries during puberty. Still he reminded himself that he would always be a thug. “A pretty thug,” Hideyoshi said while he caressed his neck down his back.

When they were not busy hacking some government’s or company’s websites, Hideyoshi would show him his antique collections of wood prints of noblemen and their male slaves engaged in sexual trysts in nanshoku teahouses.

Hideyoshi loved to rub his rough hands on Kazuki’s smooth cheeks. It didn’t matter if it was day or night, he touched him in places he couldn’t imagine that the only thing Kazuki could do was cry in his sleep.

For the second time he summoned his courage to run away. Once Hideyoshi found out that he was gone, he would be kilometers away from him. But like a moth to a flame he couldn’t resist the lure of the underworld for easy money with the click of a gun or a punch on the face.

One day—bloodied, weary, and lost—the voice of a woman asking how he was felt comic and magical at the same time. Kazuki thought he was dying from a bleeding arm and the woman surrounded in blue, violet and pink hydrangeas was an angel. Her name was Yuzuko Izumi he found out later. Like him, she was an orphan too, who lived with her 17-year-old sister. The courtship was short. He was so elated when she agreed to marry him. But one tragic day, a mission gone awry, the fates intervened taking Yuzu away from him. With his wife and their unborn child gone, his downward spiral was secure.

Still Kazuki decided that he wanted to live so he tried hard to forget all of it. That’s what he learned after years and years of bad luck. He buried them. These secrets should lie deep in the ocean forever that no one should know at all.

#buddy daddies #buddy daddies fan fic #flash fiction friday #fff196 #flashfictionfridayofficial #kazuki kurusu #yuzuko kurusu #original character #buddy daddies head canon #my fan fic stuff #my fic stuff #buddy daddies fan fiction #my fanfic stuff

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josiebelladonna · 1 year

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I’ve talked about my life in weight, losing and gaining, but I never really went into the full extent of it. Yes, this is all me above here.

Consider this a memoir of sorts. It’s a “fat memoir”, plus a weight gain journey.

To put in simplest terms, I’ve wanted to be fat since I was a little girl: I remember being five years old and eating dinner in a warm trailer on a frigid snowy night in northern Nevada, and loving the feeling. I’d tell my mom I was hungry even after I ate within the hour. I’d take off my shirt and run my hand down my chest and my belly in front of the mirror and pretend I would have a fat belly instead. 5-year-old me even thought about being 300 pounds because it was unknown and exciting to me.

I think I was 6 when I got fat-shamed the first time. I don’t remember where it came from but I remember it clear as day, though: the message that to be fat is to be bad, like it’s a bad thing. When you’re a young kid like that, you see everything in black and white, so naturally I took it to heart.

So what did I do? I started sneaking extra food, next to eating healthily. I had a balanced diet from a young age, and it would always make me full. I kept it up as we moved from Carson City to the California desert, and I transitioned from elementary to middle school.

I was 11 when I really got hit with the shame: my uncle told me that I’m solidly built and therefore prone to weight gain, and the way he said it he made it sound like it was the worst thing ever. Add to this, I had family telling me to “lay off on the chips”, even though I was still still pretty thin by the time puberty hit me. And I was in health class in sixth grade, and I was introduced to the body mass index.

I was shocked to find that I had a BMI of 25, which is just at the “overweight” mark. 12 years old, 115 pounds and 5’4”—and I was thin, too, I had a slim belly and very slight hips. Imagine hearing that you’re overweight at 12 years old when you’ve been pretty much scrawny your entire childhood because your family was poor and you were told “fat is bad” for half of your life.

Needless to say, I developed anorexia. I would go for hours, sometimes whole days, without eating. I would turn down food. I would work out hard. I would play field hockey after having eaten only a sandwich and some apple juice, do all that running around… anything i could think of that would help keep my weight down. I still gained because I was in puberty: my hips got fuller, my breasts got bigger, and I got that little curve on the waist that just happens naturally with women, but I hated it. I didn’t want that curve—I think it was here I really started crossdressing more because it happened to me naturally.

But I hated my body. I wanted to be thin, without curves, but I still wanted to be a girl, though.

Understand I still love field hockey—it’s fun! I played that and softball. But it always left me so exhausted, because I was barely eating.

I remember laying in bed, in my hockey clothes, and feeling my poor belly, in all its flatness and tenderness.

I didn’t want to suffer. It felt as though it had been forced upon me. I was forced to destroy my own body all because of some arbitrary measurement system that is known to be eugenics and yet healthcare systems continue to use it: it’s honestly astounding to me, and it makes me wonder how many more kids are out there right now who feel at odds with it, like they don’t think their bodies are beautiful no matter what shape and size they are, and they have to force themselves into this complete bullshit out of worry that they’ll develop diseases that literally anyone can get regardless of weight.

Some days I would binge on anything and everything, and of course, I would feel guilty about it afterwards, and I would start the cycle all over again. I knew something was wrong when my hair started falling out and my acne was getting worse, too.

Everyone told me I looked good, especially when I was in the bridesmaid dress at my brother’s wedding at 16 years old.

I certainly didn’t feel good, though. In fact, whenever I lost weight, it never felt good.

When my parents split, I took a turn for the worse, mainly because my dad and I got evicted and whatever food came our way, we had to ration it of sorts. When I moved into my dorm, because my campus was on a hillside, I went up and down stairs and hills all the time. I bypassed the “freshman 15” and lost fifteen pounds when I lived on campus: once again, it was the whole “look good but I don’t feel good, though”. It didn’t help that they didn’t let me keep my food money once the school year ended. I moved off campus for my senior year to an apartment complex about half a mile away, and then to the house across the street, and then a house about a block away from the school. All that moving, and I took a turn for the worse. School was getting harder and I kept losing weight all the while.

I remember feeling cold all the time: it didn’t help that I lived in the mountains of Oregon at the time, and it was quite the cold winter that year (so many days it dropped down below zero—i often thought of going outside naked and laying down in the snow, just to feel something before I “went”).

Anorexics, notably Karen Carpenter, have heart problems, and most of them do die of heart failure at some point: it was starting to go that way for me, now that i think about it in hindsight. My blood pressure has always been low, even now at my heaviest which I’ll explain soon enough, but during that low point, it was quite low. There were a few mornings I woke up and I couldn’t believe that I did, like I hadn’t died in my sleep. If anything, I was expecting it.

Anorexia also does very strange things to a person, not just physiologically and internally, but mentally, too: you get in denial and you also believe that you can’t do anything right, and you also think that everyone is out to get you. I wanted to change but I didn’t know who to turn to, and everyone seemed too busy as well.

I was stuck, and in the worst way possible. And I was shedding pounds, too.

What made me change course, you ask? Well, there are a couple of things: the first was that camping trip over thanksgiving weekend to the coast, where I ate that whole grasshopper pie by myself (no one was eating it and I didn’t want it to go to waste) plus a change in career course. I was not only another cog in the BMI machine but in the collegiate machine as well: high school left me horrifically unprepared for college life, and I felt like such a fish out of water in the engineering department. I was too weird and the curricula either bored me to tears or went right over my head. I tried talking to people, my counselor, my professors, and even my mother because she was going to the same school as me, and I was always—always—turned away. My mom was often in a bad mood back then because of the workload she had, too. It often felt like nobody was listening… until I made them listen by not signing up for spring term classes. When my parents and eventually the rest of the family found out, with this rumor that I was dropping out and throwing everything away, they all lost their shit and that was when I couldn’t take it anymore and I cried harder than I ever did in my life.

I actually remember having a makeshift noose around my neck that day. I was going to do it. I felt like I let everyone down, and throw in my malnourished, emaciated body, I had completely lost my will to live a second longer. If this was how the world saw me, a complete fuck-up and a waste of space, then I would do the honor of relieving everyone the misery of knowing me.

My father and brother would later use this against me in late 2015, well after I had begun my recovery no less, but there was no way around it, though.

It was my stepdad who talked me down from it, and I was able to brush back my tears and say it out loud that I wanted to be an artist, and he actually talked me into it, like he said that it would be the best thing for me. Honestly, that was the best thing he ever did for me… god bless his soul.

I didn’t start healing my relationship with my body until 2014, however. I had gained a little bit of weight over the course of 2013, not a lot, but it was enough to make me stop feeling cold all the time and give me some more energy to go on walks again. That was another hard winter, though, one filled with anxiety and paranoia and… not really making any sense? And what’s worse is I had no idea where it was coming from until well after the fact: it was leftover from anorexia as well as feeling like I couldn’t do anything with myself. I had transferred to a community college for my two-year degree in general art studies and everyone was looking at me funny. I had a crush on a guy who felt out of reach and I didn’t know what to tell him if I ever had the chance.

I literally felt as though I was losing my mind, all the way to the point of my finding the way to write my letter to Ben shepherd, courtesy of my mom’s willingness and keen eye. At that point, I had to take my sabbatical from school for six months and try out something to ease my mind.

I got a job at the Dutch Bros about a mile away, so I could ride my bike or walk there—I also got free coffee. I think it was here I got into the habit of getting a slice of pie at the café up the street, too: cheap-o pie, too, it was only a buck seventy-five and delicious. I had to quit because my anxiety still wasn’t getting any better, but I actually enjoyed it because of the coffee and the pie. I knew I gained weight because when I went out for a ride, I noticed I was having to pump my legs a little harder.

I kept it steady throughout 2014, through betrayals and bullies on the internet, through Chris sharing my art on Twitter, through seeing Soundgarden three times and starting up school again. But the anxiety persisted, and I could feel my body image slipping again, and I suffered a full mental breakdown to the point I nearly checked myself into the hospital.

But through my broken mind, I noticed that I was getting a little belly, a little roll of fat around my waist. And when I had to move back home as my mom and my stepdad were moving back as well to care for the house his mother left behind, the thing that kept me out of the hospital, I could see the light again.

When I got to the house, I found a scale.

199 pounds. Whoa. How did that happen?

Indeed, I looked at my body and while I had thickened a bit in the hips, I still looked very thin.

I was in the mountains: I was either walking up stairs or a hill. I could have that weight but I could exercise more, and more rigorously, too.

I dropped down to 180 by Christmas: I look at pix of myself from then, when I met Chris and when my family were being assholes for literally no reason—I’m seriously not exaggerating when I say that, either: I said I wanted to be alone with my thoughts for a bit and my dad took it the complete wrong way—and I was quite spry then.

But I felt like something was missing, though. I felt good with a belly because it gave me comfort when my mind was broken: I had always associated thinness with pain and bad periods of my life and chubbiness with joy and pleasure.

So, what did I do? I started eating more. I started relaxing more. Eating and relaxing, relaxing and eating. I gained almost 30 pounds by the springtime: I actually felt pretty good in an otherwise abysmal year.

Then my grandma passed in June and my brother and sister-in-law were giving me dirty looks at the funeral, again, for no reason. The next month my sister-in-law was killed in a freak rollover accident.

The funeral there took place in Vegas (in the middle of July, too: I remember it was 117° the day of, and everyone was wearing tuxes and heavy dresses: I was in a sundress and sweating like crazy), and during the reception, where they had a big buffet for everyone and then some, I helped myself to two plates of food, two plates full of dessert, plus a few more cookies, another cupcake, more veggies, and a couple more things. Middle of summer in Vegas at a funeral and yet I had just eaten as if it was Thanksgiving back home in Oregon on a snowy night.

It was so twisted when you think about it (and to be fair, she never liked me) but there’s something very subversive about pleasure in my eyes, though. You have to cross some lines to do right by someone, that someone being myself. And let me tell you, it felt good.

And yet, I kept my weight steady at around the 210 - 220 pound range for a few years, even through 2017, one of the worst years of my life, and when I went dark in late 2016 into late 2018. It was around here I started digging more into my sexuality and my writing: I was able to examine my thoughts more closely being away from the world for the most part. In 2019, I wrote Have Your Cake and Eat It, my ode to Lars and the fact he’s always hungry, and my first fanfic in 6 years at that point. I never really examined the kink through extensive writing before so it was an interesting endeavor.

I was around 200 by the time the lockdowns came: my eating habits went sideways all through 2019. Life didn’t really change much for me, aside from realizing everything was closed and I couldn’t do anything without a mask on. I gained a little bit of weight, but I kept exercising and the incident between me and the art thief, and the plagiarism incident between me and you-know-who, and I lost some and then I thought it had plateaued again by the time Alex entered my life.

My stepdad passed. It was a long time coming, though: the man had congestive heart failure, he was an alcoholic, and according to my mom, he was jaundiced for at least a decade. Though 2019 was a very fun year in retrospect, he began drinking more and getting drunk more often, and it wound up biting him in the ass in early 2021. Easter weekend, his liver started failing and he turned blue. The very moment he entered the hospital, he was septic and his kidneys failed.

Now it’s just my mom and me, plus our dog, our cat, his stepson and his girlfriend and their daughter.

But the next thing I know, there’s a bunch of food in the house. He’s also not around to give me shit for it, either.

I went from 212 pounds to 245 that year. Moreover, I really liked the way I looked with those 30 pounds, and I started thinking about how when I was little, I thought of gaining weight and getting very fat, how hungry I would often feel and yet I couldn’t eat because we were poor and I live in a fatphobic world.

And I haven’t looked back.

Now, here I am, at my absolute heaviest weight, 267 pounds, what you call a “big beautiful woman” or “bbw”, by definition and I love it. I love looking down and seeing my belly obscuring the view of toes (if anything, I feel relieved by it), i love how soft it feels, especially around the lower part, and I feel very sexy now. Whenever I take a pic of my body and I angle it down to my belly, I get so aroused, like I genuinely feel sexy for once.

I have a big sexy belly now.

(And you know what they say, if you feel sexy, you look sexy)

I love my double chin, too: I remember being thin and wishing I had a fat double under my chin—I’ve always found them distinguished more than anything. I love the “belt” of stretch marks on my waist: I really love stretch marks, tbh, they’re interesting.

And my body feels so strong, too: I am living proof that you can be fat and healthy. My gains have been staggered and gradual, and very healthy up to this point. It’s probably why I weigh as much as i do, and yet, the only thing about me that’s actually fat is my belly: the rest of my body is just rather full if anything. Everything is right where it should be and I’ve never felt healthier: probably the only drawbacks of being heavy are getting winded more easily and finding clothes that aren’t hideous. I’m actually getting looks now, like actual passes from strangers: I used to never get looks, either. It’s like, yeah, I’m a hot chubby chick, look at these stout curves and well-fed potbelly, babe: I can’t stop looking, too 😋🥵

Because of this, I actually want to be heavier, at least 280 pounds—5-year-old me dreamed of being 300+ and I think it’s definitely in the cards. I don’t want to be more than 375 pounds, though, I think that’d be too much.

But I like walking around and letting everything hang forth, I love eating a lot, and I love how I hold onto this weight so well: you would think that I would have been morbidly obese at this weight, but aside from the belly, I don’t really look it: I can still feel my hipbones and my ribs, and my double chin only just recently started showing itself, too. I’m chubby, but I know I can be fuller, heavier, much chubbier and rounder. I’m not big enough yet. I’m very aroused by the thought of being 298 pounds and having this lusciously fat belly on me, with tight skinny jeans to accentuate its full, round shape and nothing more than a black lace bra to show it off.

I have no doubt in my mind that my precarious formative years and teenage dysphoria has come from not being heavy and not being able to gain a lot of weight like I have the last decade. Add in my weight gain/fat kink, and it should come as no surprise that I still deal with residual shame.

But it is pleasurable, though: when my mom and I finally move away from this house, and we go back to civilization, I’ll get back into the creamy coffee and piece of pie habit, but I think I’ll mix it up. I’ll have a milkshake and a big reuben sandwich or a burger and fries or a gyro. I’ll have a full meal plus dessert, because I’ve always wanted dessert in a restaurant. I’ll go to more than one place, too. I love wearing clothes that are a bit too tight because they flatter my belly. I love fatty foods like donuts and funnel cake, and I’ll happily eat big helpings of both because they’re delicious and sexy food.

Sometimes I’ll think about disappearing into a city or an island nation like Iceland or Fiji, or a country where they love to eat like Lithuania and getting up to 300 pounds easily no questions asked, and that inexplicably feels to be in the cards, too: the only family who care about me are my parents and my aunt Chris; my mom is very supportive of me (I’m kind of the only person she cares about as she and my brother don’t talk) and since my stepdad passed, she’s been in a better place; my dad’s happy now, and my aunt Chris has always been very understanding. When my cousin Harmony came out as lesbian at age 14 and identified as male (I was a baby, so I have no memory of it), the three of them were the only ones in the whole family who understood. But my mom and I could move to Reno or at least a place where it doesn’t take a whole day to go into town, and I could get very fat so easy. I’ll flirt with 350 all because literally no one else will recognize me.

Yeah, it’s definitely bad… in a “I’m a total bad girl who gives the finger to what society wants me to be.”

My weight and the associated kink I have with it has always been a very touchy subject for me, both from the anorexia, but also from the stigma surrounding weight gain.

I remember how happy people were when I said I lost twenty pounds in 2014: I was added to a group called “breaking slim” because of it, too, started by a woman who used to be well over 300 pounds and then she lost about half of it—looking back on it, she looked better heavy; when I looked at her after the weight loss, she looked gaunt and sickly. I remember people looking at this pic of me in my old nirvana shirt and telling me I looked pretty (I sure didn’t feel it, though).

I have had friends who have gotten really fat, fatter than me, and then they lose the weight and they get so much applause and shit: I mentioned the fact that I gained weight on purpose and I’m met with shock and horror.

It’s not just me, either: there’s that one friend that I have, he was in an abusive relationship and he got out of it a few years back and he started drinking and using drugs to cope and it just about killed him (young guy, too, only a few years older than me). I saw him before I signed off facebook for another hiatus and he was in a much better place, and he got heavier as a result of his cleaning up… and naturally, there were a few comments on that thread that struck me as somewhat fatphobic. I have a couple of female friends with depression and they’re taking pills for it (that’s last thing you want to do for any mental illness, imo, but that’s just me), and the last time I saw them, they were both talking about how the medicine makes them “fat as fuck”, and I look and they’re like me about 15 pounds ago, barely chubby. I see it in Alex and the subtle self-deprecating comments he makes at himself and his body: that poor man, I swear—I want to protect him so badly, like I wish I lived closer to him and be a comfort to him. I want to be his safe place, his escape.

I hope my story helps someone somewhere, especially now with diet ads being every other commercial now with New Year’s upon us.

You are more than your weight. Diet culture is deadly, as it nearly killed me—and go down the rabbit hole with that, too, diets are not good, trust me. If anything, you should eat more: we are a country that has a huge issue with food waste, eat. Some of you look good and healthy being a little stout: in fact, you can be very healthy being a little round. If you do what my best friend Elizabeth and I used to do (and what I used to do as soon as 2016) and tuck a pillow under your shirt, and you aren’t envisioning a fetus in there, look into that: your body might be telling you something. Listen to your body and your heart, not what the world wants you to be.

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laserhairremovaltreatment04 · 11 months

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Is Acne Affecting Your Face? Here is What You Can Do

Acne can be really terrifying. It affects not only one’s face but lowers their confidence too. Most individuals think that their acne will heal on its own. Instead, the acne gets more severe and affects their face by turning into stubborn scars. Instead of letting these marks heal on their own, it is best to consult a leading acne doctor to get an effective treatment.

If one has excessive acne on their face and is searching for a leading acne doctor, one can consult Dr. Niti Gaur at Citrine Clinic to get the best acne treatment in Gurgaon.

Before discussing the effective treatment options to cure acne, let’s discuss what acne is and what causes it.

What is Acne?

Acne is a common skin condition that affects more than 85% of teenagers and young adults. The skin condition occurs when the hair follicles of the skin become clogged with dead skin cells. The areas that are most affected by acne include the back, face, chest, back, and upper arms. The different types of acne include nobules, blackheads, whiteheads, cysts, and pustules. Depending on how severe it is, acne may leave unpleasant scars on the face, which can be distressing. Therefore, it would be best to consult a dermatologist at the onset of this condition before it gets worse.

If one is searching for the best dermatologist in Gurgaon, one can consult Dr. Niti Gaur at Citrine Clinic.

What Can Cause Acne on the Face?

There are several factors that are known to cause acne on th

e face. These include:

Hormones are responsible for causing acne during puberty. They cause the oil glands to produce more oil and sebum, which tends to plug the skin pores.

Bacteria get into the skin's pores and cause acne.

The oil from the scalp, hair, and skin products and cosmetics can also plug the pores and cause acne.

There are some medicines that are also responsible for making acne worse.

Acne can also be hereditary and can run in families.

How Can Acne Be Treated?

Medical treatments are always the first line of therapy for treating acne. Here are some of the advanced acne treatments offered by Dr. Niti Gaur at the Citrine Clinic:

1. Chemical Peels: There are several types of chemical peels designed for acne. These include the salicylic acid peel, black peel, glycolic peel, TCA, and many more. The type of chemical peel used depends on the severity of acne and acne scars. Chemical peels not only hasten the procedure but also help the medicated creams penetrate deep beneath the skin. This provides a smoother and more even tone to the skin.

2. Comedone Extraction: Dermatologists remove comedones like blackheads and whiteheads from the face using special instruments. In this procedure, the expert doctor applies gentle pressure around the pores to extract blackheads, and a large needle is used to extract whiteheads.

3. Medifacials: Medifacials are an effective option to treat acne. It is much better than ordinary facials because of its composition. In Medi facials, medical-grade products are used to clean the skin and remove impurities. These facials can be customized to the skin of the patient. The procedure helps reduce oil production and unclog the pores. It renews the skin by penetrating the skin’s deepest layers and giving it a long-lasting and rejuvenated effect.

4. Carbon Laser Peel Treatment: It is an effective procedure to treat skin problems such as acne, comedones, oily skin, and enlarged pores on the skin. This procedure helps to make the skin smoother and more rejuvenated. During this treatment, liquid carbon is applied to the skin, which penetrates deep inside the pores. Carbon particles attract laser light and destroy dead skin cells, oil, and bacteria. Carbon peel treatment damages acne, which produces bacteria and improves the production of collagen deep inside the skin layers. Thus, a carbon peel is the best treatment not only for treating acne but for acne scars too. The laser light attracts the impurities, oil, and contaminants, along with the carbon particles, from the skin.

To avail the benefits of this Acne Treatment in Gurgaon, book a consultation with the leading acne doctor, Dr. Niti Gaur, at Citrine Clinic.

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druttamlenka · 1 year

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Note These Do’s and Don’ts Before You Receive Best Acne Treatment in Kolkata

Whether you are a young adult or a teen, acne problems can be disastrous. It won’t just cause a skin trouble, but might cause you feel irritated. It is even worse for people with acne-prone skin.

Severe acne breakouts can happen even with slight carelessness. Thus, it is very important to take care of your skin to prevent unwanted acne and acne pigmentations.

These Do’s and Don’ts will come in handy for such occasions.

Do’s

· Do remove your makeup before hitting the bed

Your skin heals overnight and you wake up with a smooth glowing skin in the morning. If you don’t remove your makeup and sleep with the makeup on, it can mix with the oil and dirt sitting on your skin.

This might cause pimples and your skin to breakout. Thus, cleanse your skin with a cleansing milk and apply a night cream to moisturize it. If you think your acne marks are getting worse, receive best acne treatment in Kolkata immediately.

· Clean your cosmetic brushes regularly

Your makeup brushes come across different kinds of cosmetics and synthetic products. And we tend to use the same thing over and over again without thinking much about it. However, that could turn the brushes dry causing an overly-irritated skin.

Hence, cleaning your brushes is absolutely necessary if you want to prevent your skin from any damage.

· Do wash your bed sheets and pillow covers regularly

Bedsheets and pillow covers are in direct contact with your skin while you sleep. Since your skin constantly rubs against it, using dirty sheets can cause bacterial infections or even worsen your acne situations.

Therefore, make it a habit to use clean sheets and pillow covers. Change sheets at least twice or thrice a week. Using soft fabric is also recommended.

· See a dermatologist when needed

Not all acne conditions can cure on its own. Some require careful attention, some need organic skin care cremes, and some need to get acne removal treatment Kolkata for cure.

You have to assess your skin condition and if it seems severe, you must seek medical attention. The best professionals will be able to help you find cure for your acne breakout.

Don’ts

· Do not try a new product every week

It is recommended that you try a skincare product for at least a couple of months before you switch to another. You need to watch over a few weeks to observe any changes in your acne conditions.

If you are changing your skincare products every other week, it will only worsen your skin condition.

· Don’t forget to cleanse after exercising

Exercise causes sweat. If that remains for long on your face and body, it can get in your pores and cause dead skin, attract bacteria, or fungal infection. It is better to clean your body and face with lukewarm water. You can use a mild shower gel and take a shower and then apply a moisturizer.

· Avoid stress

While research never proved stress can cause acne, observations specified that it can worsen the affect. So, if you are already suffering from acne or have an acne-prone skin, you shouldn’t take stress and try to stay calm.

While these are some do’s and don’ts for you to follow, these aren’t enough if your acne breakout is severe. It is suitable to receive best acne treatment in Kolkata and treat your skin rightfully.

If you are looking for the best acne repair clinic in Kolkata, Dr. Uttam Lenka’s Skin & Hair Clinic can help you greatly. We have highly qualified dermatologists in our team who will help you with the right treatment your skin deserves.

Visit https://druttamskinandhair.com/ for more details.

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follicleclinic · 1 year

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Can A Dermatologist Cure Your Acne?

When dealing with mild kinds of acne breakouts, certain home-based remedies such as fruit-based masks and using medicated cleansers can potentially help lessen the effects of acne. You can also try to use OTC medications containing benzoyl peroxide or salicylic acid, since these medicines can help eliminate the pimple-causing bacteria and remove stubborn blackheads.

If your condition, however, seems to get worse, or is already a moderate or severe kind of acne to begin with, it's time to see an expert for the proper treatment. In some cases, acne is caused by an imbalance of hormones, especially if there is too much testosterone and androgen, male hormones that can trigger excess oil production. When dealing with these types of condition, you can consult a dermatologist or a doctor specializing in hormonal imbalances. Best Dermatologist in kota

Some people with acne experience depression because of the profound repercussions of a blemish-filled skin on their psyche. These people tend to isolate themselves or stay away from their friends because they fear criticisms based on their physical appearances. When you are experiencing symptoms of depression because of your breakouts, it's time to talk to a dermatologist for the proper treatment and to a psychologist to help improve your self-confidence.

Expert help is also needed if you're dealing with acne scars. Big lesions can only be cosmetically removed and treated by a certified dermatologist since improper treatment may cause additional infection or might make the scar bigger and deeper.

In some women, pregnancy can actually make them prone to breakouts because of the hormonal changes that are happening as the body prepares itself for the growing foetus. If pregnancy could be the cause of your breakouts, you definitely need to talk to a dermatologist since certain medications for acne are not safe for an unborn child.

You can also visit a dermatologist if you want to know more about other medications used for acne or you want to understand the underlying factors behind your breakouts. Moreover, dermatologists are doctors trained to handle an array of skin problems that can range from simple allergic reactions to severe and disfiguring kinds of acne. Your dermatologist can prescribe stronger antibiotics and treatments if your acne is severe. They can also fully explain to you the benefits and possible risks of certain acne medications since some of these drugs can cause serious unwanted effects.

Dermatologists can also be good sources of skincare tips to help prevent acne breakouts they are also always updated about the latest acne therapies and can therefore give you a fact-based opinion regarding the latest treatments. Dermatologist in Kota

Some people think that the proper time to visit a doctor is when their breakouts have become worse, with scars and lesions already present. However, experts suggest that visiting a dermatologist before scars or lesions could even develop is the perfect time. There are now many available treatments and medications that can help prevent the formation of permanent acne scars.

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slaughterngrmorris · 2 years

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Tips For Preventing And Destroying Your Acne

An extremely uncomfortable and embarrassing form of acne is acne that forms on your back. Wearing clothing that rubs against it may be painful and any situation that calls for not having a shirt on may lead to embarrassment. Here are some tips for how to clear up and prevent back acne.

To prevent acne, you need to make sure that your face is clean, but do not over-clean. Many people think that acne is caused by dirt and therefore you should scrub and wash your face more than twice a day. This is untrue. A gentle facial cleansing one or possibly two times a day with a gentle soap and clean water is all you need for clearer skin.

Acne scars can be eliminated via a surgery, such as laser surgery. credentialing medical is something that has to be suggested by your dermatologist though. Basically, they use a gentle laser and go over the scars. Through repeated treatments, you will start to see these scars diminish and go away for long periods of time.

One of the most important ways to avoid getting acne is to keep your hands away from your face. The oils and bacteria on your fingers can actually damage your skin and cause pores to be clogged. Don't ever push on or irritate your face at all with your fingers.

To limit the formation of acne, try to reduce the amount of ketchup and tomato sauce that you consume. These foods have a lot of sugar and carbohydrates and can kick start the formation of acne. Try to stick to natural foods that are raw and organic to eliminate acne through your diet.

Air that is too dry in your bedroom, can strip the oils from your skin, which can facilitate the formation of new acne. Purchase a humidifier for your room to add that moisture back into the air and put you in a much better position to fight your battle against acne.

After you are done applying makeup or creams to your face, close the bottle or tube immediately. If you leave your acne products open, you will allow bacteria to get into them. The next time you apply, you will most likely get this bacteria on your face, irritating your skin and making acne worse.

Keep the water flowing if you want to make a dent in your acne flare-ups. When our skin is dehydrated, you will shed the dead skin cells effectively which can cause blocked pores and increases in your acne problems. Try to drink at least 2 liters of water per day for optimum affect.

Using skin care products that contain only natural ingredients are especially important if you're acne prone. Chemicals found in many products that are sold over-the-counter can seriously irritate your skin. If you put something on your skin that has strong chemicals, it may strip your skin of oil. Your skin will then over produce oil in order to compensate. The excess oil can then clog pores and cause further acne outbreaks.

If you spot a pimple that is growing on your face and you want to eliminate it quickly, try to use toothpaste on it. Just put a small dab of tooth paste, do not use the gel, on the zit. You will be surprised that come morning, it will be smaller than and not as red as it was.

An important tip to consider when concerning acne is the fact that simple household items such as ice can assist in quickly clearing up your skin. This is important because ice costs you next to nothing and will clear up acne and pimple swellings just as it will when you have sustained an injury. Apply directly for no more than 10 minutes at a time.

An important tip to consider when concerning acne is that tanning can actually cause acne to flare up more than usual. This is important to consider because there is a delicate balance between good and bad that can result from the sun. With some exposure, your skin will look more balanced and hide blemishes. With too much exposure, your skin will shed more and lead to possible pore clogging.

Back acne is not easy to live with and can lead to extremely embarrassing and uncomfortable situations. Not every method works for everyone, however as long as you follow the tips that have been provided in this article, you stand a good chance for having much clearer skin on your back.

#credentialing system

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drcarloschacon · 2 years

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Illustrations of cosmetic and plastic surgery

While a surgeon's credentials are crucial, there is no assurance that they will lead to the desired outcomes. Check with other doctors who have had the operation if you have any questions. Be careful to request references and before and after photos from prior clients before making a final choice. Along with personal references, it's crucial to examine a surgeon's qualifications with the state medical board. There are several methods for verifying these credentials.

Cosmetic surgery may be very pricey when you don't have health insurance. Be careful to account for other charges like an anesthetic, operating room equipment, and associated fees. The actual cost might be between 50% and 100% more than the surgeons. Some health insurance providers will pay a portion of the cost of cosmetic surgery, such as a nose job, to address respiratory issues. Some insurance providers may also cover specific treatment hospital and anesthetic costs.

Patients will be given comprehensive information about the process and its dangers, depending on the kind of surgery. Doctors may advise different treatments in addition to the actual operation. Cosmetic surgery aims to enhance a person's characteristics and make them more desirable to others. Therefore, cosmetic surgeons concentrate on a person's outside appearance. Patients must first discuss their goals with their doctor to accomplish this. Patients might utilize pictures of desired features to assist them in selecting what to ask for during consultation.

Surgical outcomes positively impact the emotional condition of the patient. Lower heart disease or diabetes risk may be linked to increased mental health and self-esteem. Improved self-esteem also has a positive impact on attractiveness. People are more inclined to participate in social events and face obstacles when they have more confidence. Even if this treatment is not a panacea, it is something you should think about if you are self-conscious about your looks.

Many of these doctors have extra training in facial plastic and reconstructive surgery, even though the objectives of aesthetic surgery differ from those of conventional treatments. In addition, they may be members of the American Academy of Facial Plastic and Reconstructive Surgery. Therefore, it might not be as challenging for you to decide to get cosmetic surgery as you would imagine. A licensed cosmetic surgeon can perform this operation on you even if you travel overseas. This is often referred to as "cosmetic travel."

The outcomes of surgery vary substantially. Cosmetic surgery can boost your self-esteem and physical beauty, but it can also be excruciating and harm your quality of life. Aside from the hazards associated with anesthesia, cosmetic treatments can be uncomfortable. These operations frequently result in bruising or swelling, although these side effects are transient. You can return to your routine as soon as you've healed. Even though the healing process is often swift and uneven, the intended effects could not materialize for a few weeks.

Dissatisfaction with one's looks is another typical justification for cosmetic surgery. It can take care of issues with the way your body is shaped, including getting rid of extra fat or acne scars. Fat deposits can also be eliminated by freezing fat cells beneath the skin or injecting deoxycholic acid. Filler injections and laser resurfacing are two examples of cosmetic surgery. Sclerotherapy can also be used to treat small varicose veins.

It is challenging to research the psychological impacts of cosmetic surgery since most studies are short-term and have a limited sample size. For psychologists, this information gap offers a wealth of study options. Dr. Diana Zuckerman, president of the National Research Center for Women and Families, said the study also connects a successful outcome and improved quality of life. People who experience despair and have inflated expectations tend to do worse.

A drastic alteration in look is one of cosmetic surgery's main advantages. Despite having the same physical attributes from birth, a person might feel and appear younger. When it comes to cosmetic surgery, it is essential to understand what you are getting into before having the process done. Consider all of this technique's advantages and disadvantages before making a choice. A successful cosmetic procedure may increase your self-assurance, raise your self-esteem, and make you feel more confident.

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beautywellnessblog · 2 years

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Tips and Knowledge About Acne Skin Moisturiser Singapore

An enormous business has sprung up around skincare.

A simple trip to the grocery store and a stroll down the aisle for face cleanser and moisturizer might be intimidating.

When you have acne or breakouts, it can be challenging to know how to take care of your face. You can visit Mskin23, they aim to help everyone achieve clear, glowing skin through a routine of treatments based on solid research and supported by high-quality goods.

What is acne?

Your skin's top layer may seem greasy when you have an acne outbreak.

You might think that you should dry out your skin as a result.

So, some people choose not to moisturize in order to prevent their skin from producing more oil on the surface.

‌To assist, you could even make your skin dry. Even though it seems paradoxical, this seldom turns out to be the optimal course of action. Your skin may get even more irritated as a result of this.

Even worse, it doesn't deal with the root of your acne. Near the top of your skin, in the sebaceous glands, acne first appears. Your hair follicles are housed in these glands, which also create lubricating lubricants.

Oil is naturally secreted by the sebaceous glands in your skin to maintain moisture levels. When this process is hampered and the sebaceous glands generate an excessive amount of hydrating sebum, acne develops. Your follicles become blocked by this extra oil and dead skin cells.

Your blocked follicle may produce either whiteheads or blackheads, depending on where it is. Then normally unharmful bacteria contaminate these follicles, leading to lesions including papules, pustules, nodules, and cysts.

Treating pimples

You must take a medication that affects your sebaceous glands and/or follicles to treat acne. Typically, a doctor may recommend one or perhaps more of the following therapies:

Peroxide of benzoyle

Retinoids

Antibiotics

Acid salicylate

All of these treatments cause skin drying, therefore in addition to the main therapy, your doctor will often recommend a moisturizer that is suitable for acne-prone skin. The best auxiliary players in your acne treatment strategy are moisturizers.

Why Would Someone With Acne Use Moisturizer?

However, utilizing moisturizer for acne has advantages beyond just neutralizing the effects of conventional acne treatments. Other advantages of moisturizers for treating acne exist. As follows:

Occlusive. A thin hydrophobic coating is produced by moisturizers across the skin's surface. Sebum production is decreased by putting a physical barrier across the top layer of your skin.

Humectant. A humectant draws water from your skin's inner layers to its surface.

Emollient. Moisturizing agents have the ability to calm the skin. Various compounds can accomplish this.

What Qualities Should an Acne Moisturizer Have?

Moisturizing products can occasionally be overly thick or include substances that irritate skin and exacerbate acne.

Simply seek for lotion bottles that state they are: to prevent that.

Oil-free

Non-comedogenic

not designed to clog pores

What Should You AVOID Buying If You Have Acne?

While many moisturizers can help with acne, certain moisturizers also include substances that might harm acne-prone skin, such as:

Petroleum jelly, heavy oils, and waxes. These components may weigh you down excessively and clog your pores.

Perfume and fragrance. These could irritate people or trigger allergic reactions.

Methylparabens/parabens. Additionally, these preservatives might irritate your pores and trigger allergic responses.

Acid retinol. Retinoic acid, which is frequently taken for anti-aging, can be quite irritating.

Acid salicylate. Despite being a powerful exfoliator, it might aggravate sensitive or acne-prone skin.

Using Moisturizer to Treat Acne Breakouts

The standard recommendation for moisturizer usage is to apply it two to three times each day, every day. They work best when used following a bath. ‌

Be advised that it usually takes at least 4 to 8 weeks for the majority of people to notice any effects from their acne-friendly moisturizer. Remember to be patient as your skin may need some time to adjust to any new routine.

#Acne Skin Moisturiser Singapore

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stuart79mckinnon · 2 years

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Get The Skin You Always Wanted By Following This Simple Advice

Whether you are trying to jump-start your skin care routine or you are just trying to keep it on track, try adding some of the tips below to really get you going. Beautiful skin need not be beyond your reach if you incorporate a few of the tips in this article. To keep your skin healthy, check the ingredients on the makeups you use. Makeups that use emollient formulas can clog pores. You might want to look into trying mineral-based makeups instead. These are not as bad about clogging pores. On the contrary, they sometimes offer helpful benefits like UV protection. Try mixing your own natural skin care items! A teaspoon of sugar and a half teaspoon of olive oil make a delightful sugar scrub for your lips. You can even use this mixture to exfoliate and soften rough skin on your feet, knees and elbows. It's inexpensive and entirely free of dangerous preservatives. To keep your skin looking youthful and avoid sun damage, add SPF to your daytime moisturizer. There's no need to throw out your old moisturizer, though. You can take a moisturizer you have already and put it together with a touch of a lighter lotion that does have sunscreen in it. You can use the same trick with liquid makeup. Rub a drop of cider vinegar into your blemishes. This treatment can aid in restoring the moisture to skin, reducing dryness caused by acne. You should try this during the day so you can avoid getting the smell on your sheets. my pham mq skin comes with an unwanted result: ingrown hairs. After you wax or shave, exfoliate the area with a loofa or an over-the-counter scrub each time you take a shower. Make sure to scrub the skin for at least thirty seconds. Moisturize with aloe vera gel afterward. This will prevent ingrown hairs from forming. Chapped lips can be a sign that you aren't getting enough water. It might take a few days of increased water intake to see improvement. Avoid going overboard with lip balm -- too much can actually irritate your lips, making the problem worse. Some ingredients in lipsticks can be allergens, another source of chapped lips. You may see improvement using a different brand. Drink plenty of water every day to help your skin look its best. Everyone knows that drinking water is good for your health, but it is also good for your skin. If you drink plenty of water your skin will be softer and less prone to rough, scaly patches and other problems. It's easy to think of the skin as just a thin outer shell but it is actually an extremely important protective barrier. The skin is our largest organ and should be treated with care and respect. Therefore, the health of your skin is important for the health of your entire body. As long as your other organs are in good health, so will your skin be. Stay away from tanning beds if you want to keep your skin looking young. Many people like the look of a tan, but what might be a healthy-looking glow today is a ticket to excessive wrinkles in the future. Overly-tanned skin looks especially damaged and leathery as we start to age. A good tip for maintaining great skin, is to reduce your level of stress. It's common knowledge that high levels of stress are associated with breakouts. By keeping your stress down, you won't have to worry about a surprise breakout and your skin will continue to look healthy. To improve your skin through your diet, you should eat plenty of berries. Blackberries, blueberries, and even strawberries are rich in antioxidants, which can help your skin to fight free radicals. Regular consumption of berries can keep your skin from aging prematurely, and help to reverse the effects that age has had on your skin. Certain types of tea can be great for your skin. According to research, green tea and black tea have a lot of benefits for your skin. The teas contain protective items, such as EGCG, that may help prevent some skin cancers and it can also slow down the breakdown of collagen. Finding the right way to care for you skin is easy when you know how, as you can see by the advice in the above article. Of course, the most important part is to make these tips a regular part of you daily routine and then just watch your skin glow like never before.

#mq skin chính hãng

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strange58ismail · 2 years

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All of us want to appear our best, so this information is filled with tips to support busy people make the best elegance decisions daily. There is advice on item assortment and design. You will understand the way to extend your buck with all the finances-helpful beauty tips presented in this article. So, keep reading for attractiveness and elegance tips that may truly be right for you.

If you wish to give a crunch of coloration to the deal with midday, think about stocking through to a stick of product blush or even a gel-dependent cheek blusher. Use a small amount towards the apples of your cheek, then mixing in round motions. This helps to keep your face seeking clean in a all-natural and easily used in ways that is extremely complementary. Make use of a misting spray to set cosmetics. Once you are concluded totally creating increase your encounter, lightly mist yourself using a sprayer. This can set your makeup products, keeping it in position longer before demanding anyone to contact it. This is great for lengthy nights out or events such as marriage ceremonies. Discover the ideal cosmetics for your self. With so many differing types to choose from look for makeup that is noncomedogenic. Prevent seeking also different styles of make-up simply because this can inflame your skin. Rather, find one which works for you and stick to it. Staying hydrated is an important part for any healthy skin care program. Normal water cleanses the body by natural means by flushing harmful toxins out of the body. This helps create pores and skin which is crystal clear and gorgeous. H2o is amongst the best ways to boost your skin's visual appeal. H2o naturally will help clean your body of toxins, and that action will provide you with wonderful and obvious skin through the day. For far healthier skin area, use a dried out, gentle clean on epidermis just before entering into the shower area. This can stimulate the glands that produce essential oil so that your epidermis won't dry up. Transfer it inside a spherical fashion, doing work upwards through your ft ., and after that shower area by using a delicate soap. To acquire softer and hotter lip area utilize a darling rub! Acquire 3 declines of bee honey, and mix it with fifty percent a teaspoon of sweets. Implement the mixture liberally for your lip area, and allow it to sit down for roughly 10 minutes. If you wash it off, you'll discover your mouth have received much softer and can even appearance fuller. Increase your eyeballs by carrying out focus on your eyelashes. Lots of women just use mascara and continue on their way. If you are taking an added second to curl your eyelashes ahead of using the mascara, you are going to highlight your eye area much better than you will when you just implement the mascara. Understand that unwanted sun exposure is not only unhealthy for your epidermis, also, it is unhealthy for your hair. As a result of exposure to the sun head of hair may become dried out, brittle, vulnerable and discolored. Exposure to the sun can rip healthy proteins ties within your hair and make your hair entirely less strong. So, if you are planning to be spending lots of time in the sunshine, make sure you use a cap. Great looking eyelashes can improve your appears. Every day, well before putting on your mascara, curl your lashes by having an eyelash curler. This will highlight the eyes therefore making you appearance more pleasing. Cigarette smoking, in addition to simply being associated with a myriad of health problems, also provides a very bad impact on the way you look. One of the better beauty advice is to by no means smoke cigarettes a tobacco cigarette in your own life, and if you are a tobacco user, end right away. Cigarette smoking ahead of time age groups your skin layer to result in lines and wrinkles, it can make acne a whole lot worse and it changes your teeth yellow-colored. To present more description in your eyeballs apply mascara. If you just have a few momemts, it is possible to utilize mascara to highlight your vision, and look such as you have invested additional time than you actually have planning. Incorporating eyesight shade will undoubtedly take a couple of occasions, and really concludes your look. Keep in mind that excessive exposure to the sun is not merely harmful to the skin, also, it is harmful to hair. Because of exposure to the sun locks may become dry, fragile, vulnerable and discolored. Sun exposure can damage health proteins connections with your hair to make your hair completely less strong. So, if you are intending to be paying lots of time in the sun, make sure you put on a head wear. Producing on your own look wonderful can be something that could not can come by natural means, and educating yourself about it is necessary. These suggestions and techniques are on this page to tell you the best way to utilize elegance science and stay your own personal you. Make use of your human brain to improve your image.

#ull #Hairdryer for hotels

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mxlti-fand0m-imaginess · 3 years

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Beautiful* // James March

request: none

prompts: none

warnings: language, insecurities, mentions of acne scars, stretch marks, and feeling overweight, knife play, cunnilingus, smut, bdsm, bondage, spanking, thigh riding, basically extremely kinky sex

a/n: i’ve been really insecure lately so i thought i would write this to try and cheer me up! also the insecurities mentioned in this are based on my own, so i’m sorry if you don’t relate to this!

It wasn’t as bad at first. You could handle your feelings. Hide them away under a mask and pretend that everything was okay. And this worked for a while. You didn’t face them, and in return, they didn’t hurt you.

But slowly your mask began to break.

James never stopped having his dinners with The Countess, even though you’ve been together for almost a year now. And although you knew James loved you, you couldn’t help but feel that he loved her more.

Then you started noticing things about yourself. Little insecurities, which seemed huge in your eyes. The acne scars that littered your face. The stretch marks on your thighs and waist. The way your stomach would pudge out a little more than normal. It started to get so unbearable, that you couldn’t even look in the mirror without wanting to cry.

And finally, James was becoming more distant. In the back of your mind you knew that it was because he was busy. But you couldn’t help but blame yourself. You weren’t good enough for him. You weren’t pretty enough for him. He didn’t love you anymore.

After dealing with these feelings for a while, the mask you hid behind finally broke. The final straw was when you saw James and The Countess together in the lobby. He pressed a kiss to the back of her hand. You shouldn’t have thought it anymore than James being polite, but you couldn’t stop the sinking feeling you felt seeing them together.

You ran back into the elevator and went to the seventh floor. Once the doors opened you went straight to yours and James shared room, locking the door behind you. You pressed your weight against the door, and slowly slid down, curling up into a ball.

The tears started coming. You couldn’t stop them. Every single thing that made you insecure ran through your head. You didn’t have a mask anymore. Everything you were feeling was out in the open. And it was painful. Part of you wanted to die, but doing that here would be of little help.

Even though crying in a ball was slightly comforting, you were beginning to get a little uncomfortable. The floor isn’t exactly the best place to have a breakdown. So you pulled yourself up and went to the bathroom. You put your hands on the sink and braced yourself. Slowly, you looked up into the mirror.

The sight only made you feel worse. Your acne scars were still visible, but now your eyes were red and puffy. And there were dark purple bags beneath them. The makeup you spent an hour on earlier that day had melted away through your grief, leaving a black splotchy mess.

You grabbed a makeup wipe and quickly ran it across your face. You couldn’t bare to look up in the mirror once more, so you walked back into the room. You slipped your shoes off along with your dress, before searching for one of James’ button ups.

Even though he was partially to blame for your despair, his scent was still comforting to you. You sighed as you walked over to your bed, collapsing onto of the sheets. You grabbed a pillow and hugged it, trying to find some sort of comfort. It didn’t work, but you couldn’t bring yourself to let it go.

Then the door opened. James walked in the room, and headed over to you.

“Darling, what are you doing in bed? It’s the middle of the day.”

You couldn’t answer, since your crying had exhausted you. So you didn’t do anything. You just stayed in your postion, cuddling the pillow.

“Darling?” he asked once more as he walked in front of you.

He crouched down to meet your eyes, and his face fell when he saw you. You didn’t realize it, but you were still crying. He gasped slightly as he gently brushed your tears away.

“Dearest, what’s wrong? Please talk to me.”

Slowly you sat up, letting go of the pillow. You drew your legs into your chest and stared at the ground. James sat next to you and pulled you into a hug.

“Dearest?” he said softly, hoping to get you to speak.

“Do you really love me?” you said softly, too tired to talk any louder.

“Of course I do dearest. How could you think any differently?”

“I- I’m ugly. I have scars everywhere, and I’m no where near as beautiful as Elizabeth. And you obviously still love her, becuase you still have your dinners with her. And you never spend time with me anymore, and I don’t blame you. I’m ugly, and boring, and I don’t deserve you.”

James sat in silence as he though over what you said.

“Is that really how you feel? Becuase I can assure you I don’t love Elizabeth anymore. We only have those to discuss running the hotel. If it really brings you distress I shall stop them. And I’m sorry I’ve been distant, I’ve just been very busy with John. I’ll make more time for you, I promise.”

You took in his words, slowly nodding. But you noticing how he didn’t mention you saying you were ugly. Did he agree with you? Did he think you weren’t beautiful?

As he if read your mind, James spoke once more.

“As for you not feeling beautiful, I don’t know how to respond to that. I don’t think I can accurately put into words just how beautiful you are. So I guess I’ll just have to show you.”

You were about to ask him what he meant, but you didn’t get the chance because his lips were on yours. This kiss wasn’t like the others shared between you. Normally they were hungry, and lustful. But this one felt like pure passion and love.

James gently pushed you back so you were laying down. He climbed on top of you, and slowly trailed kisses down your neck, leaving marks behind.

“Darling you look absolutely ravishing when you wear my clothes,” he said as he slowly began to unbutton the shirt you were wearing.

“But it looks even better on the floor.”

You laughed slightly at him, but fell silent when he pulled out his knife. Your pussy instantly got wet as he smirked above you, before gently running his blade over your skin.

“Don’t move dearest.”

He pushed down slightly and cut your bra and panties off, throwing the scarps of fabric aside. You shivered slightly as the cool air hit your damp pussy. James sat back and admired you. His gaze looked as though he was starving, and you were his favorite meal.

“I promise you that by the end of this, you’re going to realize just how beautiful you are.”

You nodded at his words. You watched as he moved himself in between your legs. He was so close that you could feel his breath against your heat. James started to kiss your thighs, leaving love bites all over your stretch marks.

“How could you not love these? They’re beautiful!”

You moaned softly as he bit down on the flesh of your leg. He pressed a gentle kiss over the bite marks and then turned his attention to your aching core.

He licked a stripe up your slit, causing you to moan. You reached down and lightly tugged as his hair. He groaned against you, and you shivered at the vibrations.

James continued to devour your pussy, causing you to shake under his touch. You couldn’t stop the moans that left your mouth. His tongue worked its way between your folds, causing immense pleasure to wash over you.

“Fuck James. That feels so good,” you said breathlessly.

Then he moved to suck on your clit, replacing his mouth with his fingers. He thrust two of them inside of you, pressing them lightly against the spot that drove you wild. A loud moan left your mouth at the contact.

“Oh fuck, Mr. March,” you moaned out.

James growled at the name, biting your clit. You squealed slightly in between your moans. You could feel him smirk against you. Your impending orgasm was beginning to build up. You could feel yourself getting closer with every thrust of his fingers.

“Mr. March, I- I’m gonna cum.”

As soon as the words left your mouth, James pulled away. You whined as you met his eyes, pouting slightly.

“Why’d you stop?” you asked innocently.

“You have doubted my love for you. And therefore you must be punished,” he said staring down at you.

The look he gave you was enough to make you cum on the spot. But you held it back for fear of being punished more. So instead you nodded, feeling excitement build up as your mind wondered what was in store for you.

You didn’t have long to wonder though, because soon you were being pulled onto his lap. The rough material of his clothes brushing against your bare skin made you moan softly. You knew was about to happen, and the excitement within you was building.

“You know what happens to naughty little girls, don’t you?” James asked as he gently rubbed his hand against your bare ass.

You nodded and then felt a sharp sting on your behind.

“Use your words darling,” he said in a warning tone.

“Yes Mr. March,” you answered.

“I think you deserve ten, does that seem fitting to you?”

Even though he was asking you, your answer didn’t matter. He would do whatever he seemed fit. He loved playing with you, and your opinion was not going to stop him.

“Yes, Mr. March.”

“I want you to count for me. If you mess up, we start over. Do you understand?”

“Yes Mr. March,” you responded once more.

Then you felt his hand come down on your ass, hard. You moaned slightly and forced your mind to focus.

“One.”

James continued slapping you, and you continued counting. By the end you were a tearful mess. His handprints littered your ass, and James smiled as you winced under his touch.

“You’ve been so good for me little girl. I think you deserve a reward. Would you like to cum?”

“Yes Mr. March,” you choked out through your tears.

James picked you up once more and straddled you over his legs. The coarse material against your bare pussy made you moan. You looked up at James and melted under the hunger in his gaze.

“Ride my leg,” he commanded.

You instantly complied, putting your hands on his shoulders to steady yourself. You began to move your hips back and forth against his leg. You couldn’t stop the moans that left your mouth. The way he was making you feel, was better than anything you’ve felt in a long time, and he wasn’t even doing anything to you.

“You look so beautiful like that darling. I just don’t see how you could ever doubt your beauty.”

You fell apart at his words, getting closer and closer to your edge.

“That’s it darling, cum for me.”

“Ohhh fuck, Mr. March,” you mumbled out as your orgasm washed over you.

You cling to James tightly as you rode out your high, a sense of euphoria hanging in the air. You sighed and collapsed your weight onto him. James gently wrapped his arms around you, and helped you lay down next to him.

When you heard his belt unbuckle, your head perked up as you looked over at him. James only smiled as he brought the belt over towards you. You knew what he wanted so you put your wrists against the headboard above you.

“Good girl,” he praised as he bound you to the bed.

You watched as James shed the rest of his clothing. You pussy already dripping once more. James felt your eyes on him and looked up to find you staring. He only smirked as he climbed on top of you.

“You’ve been so good for me darling. It’s only fitting that I give you what you want.”

In your post orgasmic bliss you couldn’t do much more than nod at his words. James reached between your legs and swiped a finger through your heat.

“You’re already soaked again. You must really want me.”

James lined his cock up with your pussy and pushed in, bottoming out completely. You let out a moan at the feeling, and winced only slightly due to overstimulation.

But he didn’t give you anytime to adjust. He began rapidly thrusting into you, looking deeply into your eyes. Your eyes met his and you could feel the love pouring out of them. You went to pull him closer to you, but couldn’t due to your restraints.

“I wanna touch you,” you begged as you tried to reach towards him.

“Hmm, I don’t know if you deserve it,” he said, teasing you.

You moaned once more as he began to thrust against your g-spot. One of his hands trailed down your body and began to rub circles onto your clit.

“Please. Please Mr. March, let me touch you. Please,” you said before another moan came out of your mouth.

Giving in to you, James undid the belt, and your hands instantly went to his shoulders, pulling him closer to you. You wrapped your legs around his waist, trying to get as close to him as you could.

Then you felt it once more. The knot building in your stomach. You were about to cum once more. Your moans increased as you neared your edge.

“James. I- I’m gonna cum.”

“Cum for me dearest. You deserve it.”

At his command, you let go, covering his cock in your juices. A few moments later, James grunted as he spilled his seed inside of you. He collapsed on top of you, before pulling out, and laying down next to you. You felt a mixture of yours and his cum drip down your legs, covering the inside of your thighs.

He went to get up to grab you a towel to clean up with, but you grabbed his wrist.

“Stay with me, please.”

“I’ll be back in just a moment darling. You’re going to be quite sticky if I don’t clean you up.”

You sleepily nodded and let go off him. James returned moments later, and wiped the cum off of your legs. He then tossed the towel aside and laid down next to you once more. You snuggled into him, breathing in his scent, and allowing yourself to relax.

“Darling, I truly am sorry for my absence as of late. I promise you I will make more time for you, no matter the cost. And I really hope you do realize just how beautiful you are.”

James was concerned when you didn’t answer, but immediately relaxed after he looked down. You were fast asleep in his arms. He pressed a gentle kiss to your head, and allowed himself to fall asleep next to you.

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siriusmydeer · 3 years

Note

hi Gia, love, I’m so proud of you. You deserve it so so much!!!

🌗if it wouldn’t be a problem, can you write a blurb with James where the reader wears makeup and is insecure without it, because she has acne? :(

love you and your work so much

so bewitching

james potter x fem!reader

summary: james sees you without makeup for the first time.

word count: 1.2k

warnings: insecurity, self doubt, swearing, mentions of anxiety, insecurities surrounding blemishes and acne

a/n: thank u dear, and to anyone with acne, blemishes, textured skin, dark circles, and anyone with skin insecurities come here let me kiss ur forehead ur beautiful <3

“what is it?” james questioned from his seated place on your bed, gazing at the creases in your bed comforter then over to your anxious figure; you had standing in the doorway of your bathroom for the last five minutes picking and biting at your nails, now, shifting from foot to foot while the wood underneath your feet creaked under your anxiety-ridden figure.

your heartbeat could’ve been going faster than a chevrolet from ‘79 from the built anxiety that was clung to your bloodstream from the moment james asked you if he could stay the night and watch those ‘muggle films’ you had been smitten with. both you and james had only been dating for a few weeks and best friends prior, but this was the first time he had wanted to stayed in your room overnight and before thinking you had said yes.

therefore, you had to take off your same face of makeup that you had been wearing since the brick of puberty had hit you in the face third year. the thought of going to bed with foundation clogging your pores, and your eyelashes sticking together was tremendously unappealing to your acne ridden skin that was hidden underneath your makeup.

“uhm, it’s nothing i just, i have to take my makeup off.” you stammered slowly as you burned a glare into the dark mahogany floor then looking at james pointing a thumb in a backwards direction. you were afraid i mean what if the boy that the boy that you had finally gotten to show your adorned love might’ve found you ugly for your textured skin. his brows creased immensely while diving into his mind in thought. okay... but what’s the problem?

you gaped into the same cerulean eyes you had fallen in love with for the past several years, his eyes sprouted in confusion as his pupils dilated at you, his eyes crinkling as he thought as to why you were procrastinating a simple task. james gestured to the bathroom, waiting for you to do so.

your breath trembled as you sighed in anxiety, your breath starting to quiver when you made eye contact with your reflection in the substantially big mirror, you fiddled with your fingers for a few seconds— maybe you could’ve taken it off and quickly put on some bb cream?

bad idea, if would’ve made to your skin worse. so you tapped your forehead a few times to disperse your fearful thoughts before quickly grabbing the moist wipe from the viridescent package and smearing the ivory wipe all over the ripples in your flesh.

the quick reddening hues becoming more distinct as your swiped off all the foundation along with other products that coated your face deeply. you felt embarrassed and maybe even ashamed, nobody else your age had this many pimples— normally they had a zit or two and they could cover it easily if it even bothered them, but you, you had to cover the reddening marks every single morning.

you didn’t want people to see your biggest insecurity, at first it was just something expressive to put on your face. something normally all girls did in third year or up, but over time it grew to be something so much more than that; and now you couldn’t even go to breakfast without at least covering up those pesky specs of red all over your face.

you looked in your reflection again, and boy did you hate what you saw. you assumed that james would hate it just as much, maybe even more than you did, but were your assumptions so mistaken.

you shook your head in an attempt to clear your destructive thoughts yet again, hastily walking over and sitting next to him on the creased lilac comforter. he zoned out of his thoughts, turning his head and seeing his dark-brunette tendrils swish as he moved; james was adamantly gaping at you, mouth blubbering like a fish and your face utterly bare.

you were so— so beautiful.

“what— why are you staring at me like that.” your question rung through his ears like bells, your mind quickly puzzling together the worst in extensive insecurity. placing your palms on the planes of your cheeks in away to cover up from him and his intense gaze on your face.

“you’re so fucking stunning.” james whispered, more to himself than you, but subconsciously grabbing your palms away from the apples of your cheeks and replacing them with his own calloused palms. he encased his hands onto your face, the rough exterior of his hands directly on the textures of your face while gazing at your features.

the pads of his thumbs directly stroking the ripples in your skin, the adoration in his warm eyes glowering over your face. “merlin, i don’t think i ever want to see you wear makeup again.” his voice was crooning, and murmured softly to you, he was so adamantly confused as to why you would cover your face. you felt the warmth in his hands directly on the apples of your cheeks, he felt your small smile graze your lips in his palms from the rising of your cheeks; similar pride swirling in his mind like pure elation and gratification, it was your smile that you gave only the gryffindor boy.

“i didn’t— i didn’t want you to think i was, like, ugly....” you stumbled off in humility, intensely staring again, this time towards your lap rather than the deep brown colour of your floor. his slouched figure looked at you in dejection— you were the most beautiful person to ever exist, how could he ever think you of all people were ugly?

you felt his nose nudge against yours softly, looking you deep into those same adorning cerulean eyes pooling in the cool shade of blue that you continually gaped into while timidity hazardously creeped onto your face in embarrassment of your confession.

“y/n, how could you ever— why would you ever think that? you’re utterly the most beautiful person i’ve ever seen, ever.” his sincerity spoke directly to the heart that had been rapidly beating in your chest, sorrow overwhelmed his nervous system at your insecurity. “i just— acne, pimples, scarring all that it’s not, it’s not like pretty on me i guess.” your voice was truthful while you stammered trying to be honest with him and pick the right words, not a singular ounce dishonesty in your voice.

“but it makes you so, so beautiful. you’re face it’s so unique, and makeup or not you’re still the most angelic thing that exists; and that’s factual i won’t take no for an answer.” he crooned, removing one of his hands from your face and sponging small kisses onto the planes of your cheeks, directly onto your flushed cheeks at his affirmations.

“you’re so— so perfect in my eyes, y’know some gits have other definitions of perfect but who cares because this is mine and too be honest mine is the only one that matters so, that’s my statement.” he added humorously, feeling the vibrations of your chuckle into his palm send shockwaves of your happiness through his blood stream.

“my witch, is so, so bewitching.”

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if your username is crossed out that means you gave me the wrong username or your settings for public display tags are off!

#james potter one shot #james potter fluff #james potter fic #james potter fanfiction #james potter x oc #james potter x you #james potter #james potter x y/n #james potter x reader #james potter series #james potter supremacy #james potter smut #james potter angst #james & peter & remus & sirius

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nhlandotherimagines · 3 years

Text

So I’ve been thinking a lot about something lately and I just wanted to put it out there for anyone willing to put some thought into.

This post is regarding the “Hockey boys only date pretty blonde girls” comments.

I would like to warn this may get long, and is not meant to offend anyone nor is it meant to place any blame on anyone in particular. So if you want to hear the opinion of why I (a white, blonde hair blue eyed, female hockey fan) believe these comments are problematic see below the cut 🤷🏼‍♀️

WARNINGS: talks negative body image and unhealthy beauty standards.

So let’s start with the real issue here: the comments aren’t exactly false. It’s been instilled into the brains of young people for decades that these “model type” women are the definition of beauty and therefore if you can pull one you are successful in life. And although these women ARE incredibly beautiful and any man (or woman or anyone for that matter) who gets to marry/date them should feel very lucky; “beauty” does not equal success. Every person on this earth no matter their ethnicity, hair colour, eye colour, wealth status, or anything else; is beautiful and deserving of love. It’s plain and simple.

Now the real reason I wanted to make this post was for anyone, but specifically straight women, who have those “beautiful” characteristics. Blue eyes, thin figure, white skin, and blonde hair. Or variations of that.

This is not specific to hockey players, but just humanity in general. I’ve been told from the time I was 5 years old that because I am skinny, have blonde hair, a pale complexion, and blue eyes that I will have boys and men falling all over me forever.

You may be thinking “Wow, Jessie that sounds like a real confidence boost and you complaining about this and playing the victim here is terrible. So many women have it so much worse”, and you’re mostly right. I am incredibly privileged, and I try my best to remind myself of that every day. My intention is not to cry about having it worse, because I do not. My intention is to only show how telling girls, or anyone really, these things can be harmful even though you feel like it’s a compliment.

So to get back on track, I was told all guys should want me and that I will be fighting them off for my whole life. Well guess what, I am 21, I have not once in my life had a serious boyfriend, and I have never had to “fight them off”. In middle school, I convinced myself that the only plausible reason boys didn’t like me or find me appealing was because I was a lesbian. I later on learned that I was not a lesbian, and no matter how hard I tried to be I was still attracted to boys. (I’m bisexual)

So by the time I was 18, I learned that no, it’s not because I’m gay that boys aren’t interested. So what was it? I’m not blonde enough? Died my hair and that didn’t work. My acne? Worked on that, not perfect but still no one. Not thin enough? Tried to lose weight and become more fit, and BOOM! IT WORKED!!!

Except, it didn’t. Because I was so desperate for a man, any man, to pay attention to me, I allowed myself to get played. He was not interested because I was pretty, or blonde, or thin. He was interested because I was easy. Because I was broken. When I turned 19, I was heartbroken, and completely disgusted by myself, and yet I continued to be told “it doesn’t make sense, you’re too pretty.”

So if I am the “perfect” candidate, and still no guy is willing to even flirt with the idea of dating me, why am I still single? If it’s not my looks, it must be my personality right? I must be so boring. Maybe my laugh is obnoxious. Maybe I’m actually a really terrible person.

I spent the first half of my life worrying I didn’t “look” the part, and now I feel like the problem isn’t that I don’t look the part, it’s that I can’t play the part. Perhaps I’m unlovable. Maybe this sounds dramatic, and it probably is. I’m working on it, on myself. Trying to work on myself, and realizing that I don’t have to be anyone other than myself. I do know this though, if I’ve felt this way, I’m not the only one. So before you try “complimenting” someone by telling them you “can’t believe” they’re single, or “guys must be falling all over you”, think about what you’re implying. You can compliment people in many very nice ways, and I think we all should try to keep our assumptions and biases out of compliments. Stick to the facts. That shirt looks fantastic on you. You have really pretty eyes. I love your smile. You are so funny. Simple, and honest.

I don’t know if any of this makes sense, but if you take one thing from what I’ve written let it be this: beauty is not defined by how desirable you are to anyone. No matter your body shape or size, your ethnicity, your hair, your eyes or any other attribute; you are beautiful and worthy of love. Let’s lift each other up, it’s what we ALL deserve.

#sorry this got ramble-y #I hope this makes sense #I also hope it doesn’t sound like I’m crying for attention #I’m just talking about what I know which is my experience #I did not proof read this very well

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springday-aus · 3 years

Text

Superpower!AU with Hyungwon

—

Group: Monsta X

Member: Chae Hyungwon

Genre: fluff, romance, small [very minimal] angst

TW: car accident - don’t worry, no one died

Type: Bulletpoint AU

Word Count: approx. 2.8k

→ Inspired by the AU Prompt: “I know you can read minds and I really like you so I’m constantly filtering my thoughts—stop making fun of how I think of fighting giraffes, it’s my go-to when I think about you shirtless”

so Hyungwon has the power of telepathy

how he got it was rather odd

he wasn’t necessarily born with it—it kind of came to him

despite what people might think, it wasn’t radioactivity

it was actually due to an accident

when he was young, there was a minor encounter

basically, there was a car and semi-truck incident

next thing he knew, his parents were in critical condition and he was being rolled into the ER for surgery

when he woke up, he was in his hospital bed and the ventilator was hooked up to him

he heard the voices of the nurses and the doctors, but their mouths weren’t moving

originally he brushed it off since he hasn’t fully recovered and his vision kept going in and out

but once he did recover… he could still hear them

luckily, his parents were okay

and that was how he was able to confirm his new-found power

he was able to hear theirs first and it was…. insane

he was freaked out, his parents were freaked out

once they calmed down, they tried to figure out what to do—they eventually came to the conclusion to just let it happen

they can’t control that so they might as well figure it out together

at first, it was uncontrollable, so he heard these voices whether or not he wanted to hear them

it was always loud and his own thoughts were never heard in his own head

oh, the amount of migraines he’d gotten from a young age…

but, don’t worry, he learned to maintain it as he grew up

now, he’s able to listen whenever he looks at someone and concentrate a bit more

he’s got a better control of it, but it also means he has to be careful as to where he looks bc he doesn’t wanna listen in on someone’s private thoughts

he’s always been getting in trouble when he was trying not to get in trouble when it comes to his telepathy

that tends to happen a lot in general though

because you’re hearing a lot of thoughts that you’re not trying to hear

which is why music became a good route of distraction

at first, the monsta x boys made fun of him for not getting airpods, but, after telling them about his telepathy, they understood why he got those big ass headphones

but, we’ll get to them later

anyways

bruh, high school was extra rough on this man

can you imagine hearing all of those thoughts? especially of hormonal teenage boys?

nasty

anyways

I like to think that this is why he sleeps so much

when he first got it, it was very emotionally draining for him and he slept like twelve hours at a time

unfortunately, he got into this habit and now he can doze off if he zones out enough

he slept a lot in high school, considering that he was trying not to hear his teacher’s thoughts and the other students and focus on the lesson and would end up falling asleep on his desk and then getting in trouble with the teachers

again, it’s that whole getting in trouble without meaning to get into trouble

so anyways

his family are the main people who know and god

the amount of family tea he’s gotten from his parents’ thoughts

while he does hate being able to hear all these thoughts without a choice, his favorite is the family gatherings and reunions

homeboy could make a tv novella with all the information he’s got on his family

because his immediate family are the ones who know, whereas his cousin that’s like twice removed doesn’t, but that’s justifiable

also, his parents have to be careful when they’re talking about him or his younger brother tho

(Hyungwon: “dad, am I not your favorite?”

his dad: “I don’t have have favorites”

Hyungwon: “the lies”)

other than his family, his long time friends also know, i.e. the monsta x boys

I’m talking long term because he’s so comfortable with them and Hyungwon was stupid and let it slip

Jooheon: I know we agreed on Chinese but I kind of wanted pizza

Hyungwon: “we can get both if you want”

Jooheon: “get what?”

Hyungwon: wait a second

oh, whenever they play games, Hyungwon uses this telepathy to help him cheat

and Changkyun was suspicious of how Hyungwon, the guy who falls asleep 20 minutes into a movie, had such good gaming tactics

his suspicions were confirmed when Hyungwon told them but they all also lowkey were confused and didn’t believe him, altho it did fill in a few of the gaps

like how Hyungwon gives perfect gifts for people that they can actually use

and how he can easily solve issues before they can even become bigger issues

there were just bits and pieces that came together and he did get to prove it

Kihyun: “what am I thinking about?”

Hyungwon: “I don’t think you would want me to say it in front of our Minhyuk here”

Kihyun: …… “okay, you pass”

but revealing this also means a lot of questions

especially from Minhyuk, who’s bouncing around and is curious as to how it works

and isn’t like always being verbally asked

like, the questions will just pop into their heads and Hyungwon hears it

actually what he hears is

Minhyuk: can he hear animal thoughts?

Minhyuk: do they speak English? or do they speak in that animal sound?

Minhyuk: should I ask him? or am I going to be bothering him?

Minhyuk: okay, try to be casual and slip it in and-

Hyungwon: “I can only hear people’s thoughts, now can we please get on with the meal?”

Minhyuk: oh right he can hear mine

Hyungwon: “YES I CAN HEAR IT PLEASE BE QUIET”

Wonho: …. “what’s going on????”

this is why he favors you compared to the others

you’re curious, but not like super curious like Minhyuk

but it’s also because your thoughts are the most hilarious ones

it’s primarily because you censor a lot of your thoughts with other thoughts and they are….. eccentric

there’s a reason tho

long story short: you like him

you two are basically childhood friends

you met in middle school and woke him up before he could get in trouble and it was all history from there

it wasn’t until around the college years that the feeling hit you like a ton of bricks

and when it did hit, you were lucky Hyungwon wasn’t around to read your thoughts

because……... oof

he went from that kid with acne that you used to spray water at to keep awake

to a handsome young man that makes your heart pound so loudly in your chest

he had told you about these powers of his about a year into college, when he realized you weren’t going to disappear from his life so easily

but also because you were thinking about how the fbi is definitely listening in on your conversations because you got an ad on instagram about those sleeping bags that make it look like you were being eaten by a shark and he HAD to make a comment

Hyungwon: “dude what the fuck”

You: “what?”

Hyungwon: “how bad is your anxiety that you’re worried about the fbi agent in your phone?”

You: …… **narrows eyes** “I didn’t say anything about an fbi agent”

Hyungwon: ah shit, here we go again

anyways

that’s just a small glimpse of what Hyungwon has to hear

your thoughts were hilarious to tune into, to the point where Hyungwon listens in when you’re daydreaming and it’s like his news for the day

and it only got worse (at least for you) because you were constantly censoring your thoughts after your self-discovery of your feelings for him

you two were studying in the library one time for finals and he got real close to get a good look at the textbook to see where you were

and you couldn’t stop thinking about how close he was

but when he looked at you

you immediately switched your thoughts to think about that time Wonho choked on his ramen noodles

Hyungwon: “why are you thinking about Wonho choking?”

You: “because it’s funny?”

Hyungwon: …… “fair point”

and so now, you have something to turn to each time an incident happens

whenever he says something that makes your heart flutter, you think about Ted Bundy’s yellow buggy

whenever he makes you unconsciously jealous, you think about fat cats sitting on glass tables

you have something for everything

and Hyungwon has no idea because you’ve gotten so fucking good at hiding it

until one day, you were out with the boys, trying out this new restaurant that opened beside the river

Jooheon talks about how nice it would be nice to go to the beach sometime

Shownu tries to start plans and says y’all could plan a barbeque and make a whole trip out of it

but then Kihyun whines, saying he’s not ready because he hasn’t gone to the gym in a month

Wonho: “you haven’t gone to the gym period”

Kihyun: “better than me living there like you do”

Wonho: “and who’s the one with the abs?”

Kihyun: “son of a bitch”

that got you thinking

Hyungwon? on the beach? that means he’s just gonna chill on the side

but that also means….. a shirtless Hyungwon

Shownu: “what do you think (y/n)?”

You: “nothing, absolutely nothing”

Hyungwon looks over at you with a knowing look in his eyes

You: “what?”

Hyungwon: ………….. “why are you thinking about fighting giraffes?”

Minhyuk: “.... is that really what (y/n)’s thinking?”

Changkyun: “dude”

You: “sorry for thinking about the zoo?”

Hyungwon: “we were talking about the beach, why were you thinking about the zoo?”

You: god, I wanna die

Hyungwon: “well, are you going to die before or after the beach trip?”

Shownu: “we need to keep track of the body count, (y/n), this is important”

sometimes you also wonder why you like him when these moments occur

but then he gives you that smile and you think to yourself

it do be like that

and because you all are trying to plan out the beach trip, you couldn’t stop thinking about…. shirtless Hyungwon

therefore

starts up more thoughts about fighting giraffes ensue

and more teasing on behalf of Hyungwon to you

Hyungwon: “do you wanna go to the zoo instead???? is that why you keep thinking about these giraffes????”

You: I. want. to. die.

Hyungwon: “you’ll die if you join the fighting giraffes—oW OWW OKAY I’LL SHUT UP”

the nonstop teasing for weekkkkkksss

until he finally asks you, the day before the trip

Hyungwon: “seriously, are you upset that we went out to the beach instead of the zoo?”

You: ugh, this whole ass man keeps making fun of me for thinking about fighting giraffes, this is your fault for being so fucking attract-

You: WONH O CHOKI NG ON RAMEN

Hyungwon: “WHOA NO FINISH YOUR THOUGHT”

You: NO

You: WONHO. CHOKING. LALALALLALA-

you avoided him for the rest of the day and filled your head with more censored thoughts

so he couldn’t hear anything else

and he didn’t

homeboy was left so confused because

he really likes having you as a friend but

having you as a partner would be so much better

he’s liked you since high school

hearing your thought process and little quirks

he grew fond of them

he knows it’s really invasive, but, in his defense, he was still learning to control them

and he found himself staring at you more and more, accidentally hearing your thoughts

one thing he really hated about his power is that even when he’s just taking in your presence………… he can still hear it even if he doesn’t try to

but anyways

he was sure of his feelings, but didn’t wanna push anything until he was absolutely sure

and now just might be that chance

so, after ducking him the entire day, which is hard to do when he’s trying to find you the entire day

(it’s not that hard considering all he hears from you is “FBI AGENTS GET OUT”)

(at least, that’s what you were trying to think so he doesn’t hear anything else about how you were going to explain yourself)

and he manages to catch you when the boys set up a bonfire and there’s no other spots…… except the one next to Hyungwon

which he totally, 100% did not plan

;)

anyways, you try to distract yourself by focusing your attention the marshmallow you have roasting over the fire

whereas he’s trying to read your mind, but it goes to waste as your attention is solely focused on the marshmallow

hence the tune of IU’s Marshmallow being played in your head

some of the other guys leave the bonfire, either to take a nightly beach stroll or to sleep

and that left you, Hyungwon, and a melting marshmallow that you were trying to keep from completely burning

before you could flee though, Hyungwon speaks up

Hyungwon: “what? no fighting giraffes?”

You: “I will hit you with a flaming marshmallow”

you thought about it for a second tho, why did you think about fighting giraffes?

the boys were talking about the beach and then they talked about the trip

and the beach made you think about a shirtless Hyungwon

…………. shirtless Hyungwon

FIGHTING GIRAFFES

Hyungwon: “wait what”

You: fuck

You: “fuck”

and then your worst nightmare happens

he starts laughing

You: “sssttttoooppppppp”

You: “it’s my go-to when I think about you shirtless, okay? are you satisfied?”

he keeps laughing

Hyungwon: “do you like the image that much that you have diverted your thoughts from it?”

You: bitch

Hyungwon: “I heard that”

You: “I KNOW YOU DID”

there’s a bit of a lull and you try to focus on your marshmallow again, but the heat on your face isn’t from the fire alone

Hyungwon: “don’t be embarrassed”

You: “I’m embarrassed because it’s you, idiot”

Hyungwon: “why?”

You: because I like you

Hyungwon: “how dumb of you to think I didn’t feel the same way”

you turn to him

You: really?”

Hyungwon: “yeah really”

Hyungwon: “your marshmallow is burning”

that’s not the only thing burning

you both assumed that was the night that you both agreed to date

the next day, were the boys shocked that the two of you are dating?

not exactly

bc they knew Hyungwon liked you for quite some time and also the fact that whenever one of them did think you were cute….

let’s just say Hyungwon’s mouth said idc but his eyes said he could murder them and get away with it

also he trusted you enough to tell you about this secret of his, so there was definitely a high chance he was going to develop romantic feelings for you anyways

*cue a sad Minhyuk in the corner somewhere*

KIDDING

or am I

anyways

there isn’t much change to your relationship

other than additional cuddling and pecks here and now

altho there are a couple of changes

your thought processes are more clear because now you have nothing to hide but

they are also unclear because it’s like

Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hyungwon. Hy—

he also tries more and more not to hear your thoughts, but sometimes it’s hard not to hear them, especially as he openly stares at you more and more

but then again, because of that, he’s gaining better and better control of his powers

he lowkey does use it when you get into arguments because it gives him a better understanding of your perspective and that allows him to provide his and it opens up more communication between you two, even if you don’t have telepathy

also he tried to make up for it by saying everything he’s thinking

that was a very bad idea from the start bc you got annoyed really quickly

but you also kind of sympathized with him

You: “I’m sorry you have to hear my thoughts all the time”

Hyungwon: “that’s not your fault”

You: “but that’s not yours either”

he loves being able to talk to you about these things bc it really feels like someone’s in his corner

you try to understand him better and make things easier

whether it’s getting him better headphones

or distracting him with your own obscure thoughts

I’m very sure that anyone who dates Hyungwon in general is going to nap with him so…

many many naps with him with lots and lots of cuddles

you both take care of one another, physically and mentally

especially since you know he isn’t the type that opens himself up to many people

and hearing all of these thoughts, yours and others, must be exhausting for him

anyways in this household we love and protect Chae Hyungwon bc homeboy is just tired and needs a break

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