#I'm just writing random things at this point | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

Visit Blog

Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.

Fun Fact

Tumblr has a 66 index score for customer satisfaction in the US.

#I'm just writing random things at this point

wonton4rang · 1 day

Note

Can you write about Taesan being jealous ( but he's not your bf ) pls understand what I mean TT

i gotcha! or at least i think i did :') (and i really hope i did)

warnings; toxic behaviour, usage of taesan's real name (han dongmin), kissing. mentions of leehan.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

tbh taesan doesn't seems like the jealous type, i mean, c'mon WHY in the world would HE be jealous? he's so handsome and secure about himself that i can't see him being actually jealous over stupid things. not even serious stuff, he would just get kinda mad/ offended and confront you directly, asking you what's going on before jumping into any conclusions.

so you just know something's not right when he directly asks "why were you with leehan? you know how late it was? you shouldn't be out with boys that late at night" you first did not follow what he meant because it didn't make any sense, why was taesan out of all people questioning who you hanged out with or at what time you did it.

"we met up to watch a movie at his place but how did you even knew about that?" taesan clicked his tongue while he looked away from your questioning gaze, running his fingers through his hair before facing you again, "why shouldn't i know? is there anything you don't want me to know?" well what the fuck was he thinking.

you did not have anything against leehan but did taesan really thought you liked him? he was definitely not your type, and you thought your closest friend in college taesan would know that.

"why are you acting like this? did i do something to you?" but this was not flowing as a conversation when all you guys did was make question after question.

"do you like him? you should know he likes danielle"

"and i don't give a single fuck, dongmin, i'm pretty sure he likes her by the way he wouldn't stop babbling about it last night"

taesan was getting icky with the way you mentioned leehan: 'last night', 'at his place', 'why are you acting like this?' did you really have to ask? his eyebrows were so frowned and you could tell that he was thinking so hard about his next words, the way he opened his mouth and closed it again giving you the feeling of expectation he shattered when he finally spoke "i don't think you should be meeting him at his place, not that late, and specially not just the two of you. and before you excuse yourself by saying he likes danielle, that does not mean anything to a boy" he looked down on you a few times before he laughed a bit, looking around and thinking about how comical you may think this situation was.

because it was comically stupid, he was not even your boyfriend, he had a thing for you and even though he was very secure about his appearance, it was not on his plans to loose you if you didn't like him back for any reason. so he just stayed there, putting himself in the friendzone everyone frenetically wants to escape just so he could keep you close.

"aren't you going to say anything?" dongmin clapped back and you finally came back to your senses, this time you were the one laughing, crossing your arms in top of your chest and tilting your head.

"i really don't know what to say. but do you have anything to say to me?" at this point you knew, there has to be something behind his words, you needed to open your eyes and understand that taesan was NOT the type to be this direct, this talkative, this touchy, this friendly, he was not the type to carry your backpack when you were tired or buy you food just because you said it looked good, he was not the type to make random jokes and help you out with homework at his place while he looked at you with so much admiration that you could physically feel his gaze.

and he definitely was not the jealous type of person that would make this type of scenes just because you were their friend and they were worried about you going out too late to a boy's dorm.

"i just don't want you to see him again, can't you do those things with me? is it so hard?" you just denied with your head, running a hand through your hair before closing your eyes and letting a sigh out.

"you know you can just tell me if you wanna hang out with me, but as you never did i-"

"that doesn't mean i want you to hang out with other boys" he quickly stopped your words 'i just don't trust myself around you' were his next words, he couldn't hold himself from wanting to kiss you lately, but he stopped beforehand, just letting out a complain before grabbing his bag from the floor of your dorm and making his way to the door "don't mind me, i'm sorry if i made you feel uncomfortable, i'll just go. goodnight"

but what taesan did not expect was your hand grabbing his black jacket and pulling down to make him stop, he looked at you, his back still facing you, his hand around the doornob and his eyes looking so sad yet expecting that it just made you feel some type of way that led you to say "can you stay the night?" he finally turned around to face you, looking so shocked and confused as he could be "i mean is late and i wouldn't mind some company"

"if that's the case then i think i should keep you company, right?" a smile ran through his lips, his eyes looking so bright and that little blush in his cheeks making him look like the most adorable boy you've ever seen, you looked down to notice you were still holding his jacket and instead of letting it go you just pulled him closer, both of your chests collapsing together and you could feel his breath growing faster and more nervous each second that went by.

and you really didn't know what you were thinking when you leaned forward and brushed your lips together as a form of asking for permission, permission that was granted when taesan quickly joined your lips in a sweet kiss, sweeter than you ever expected, specially with the recent argument you guys had, but it was better than anything you could've imagined.

he was so soft, so good at making your legs weak with a slow and warm kiss, his tongue poking your bottom lip and his right hand going up to your hair to get you closer to him, you stumbling with your own feet at the action but being carefully held by his other hand grabbing your waist after his bag fell to the ground. the kiss went on for a few more seconds, almost a minute, before you two pulled apart, you trying to look him in the eyes but he just looked at the ground because he was so ashamed :(

"dongmin?"

"you know i like you, right?" you just nodded when he looked up "well fuck, what gave me up?" you laughed, it was funny because you just realized during your kiss about his feelings, no one ever kissed you that way, with so much care and softness, he was so lovely that you just knew.

"your kiss was really sweet, you know?" and it was his turn to laugh, just looking back to the ground and then facing you to ask "so, what now?"

"well, you are staying the night, we can talk about it"

"we can't be friends after this, i can't, y/n"

"i never said we'll be friends"

and the night just went on, jealousy forgotten long ago and you two cuddling in the couch while you watched a random movie but it was truly just you two kissing all night :((

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

this is my first taesan ask!! tysm, i hope y'all enjoyed 🫶

#boynextdoor imagines #boynextdoor scenarios #boynextdoor smut #boynextdoor x reader #taesan #taesan x reader #taesan smut #leehan x reader #leehan smut

61 notes · View notes

winterspixels · 3 months

Text

"Why are you dressed like a knock off Indiana Jones?"

"You don't like it? When you asked me to pack for an archeological expedition, this is what came to mind. I must admit khaki isn't really my color."

"It's a little much."

"Hmm, you're right. I brought a backup just in case."

"I'm starting to think you googled Harrison Ford movie roles for this trip. Han Solo, seriously."

"He was a spice runner; I was a master thief. It made sense at the time. Besides, this is a lot more comfortable."

"...Why are you like this?"

"You know, my brother's been asking me that same question since we were kids. I'm not sure he ever found an answer. Personally, I feel I'm simply one of a kind."

#ts3 #I'm just writing random things at this point #after putting this together I realized both Indy and Han tended towards earth colors so technically the outfits could be interchangeable #Chase Laskaris #yes I deliberately left who he's talking to vague

11 notes · View notes

tsukiyo-7 · 5 months

Text

The more I progress with Supernatural (I'm halfway season 12 now) the more is plain to see that the authors or whoever was in charge has a distinct preference for Dean and making him shine and Sam is basically just there to be the Woman in the Refrigerator. Even when Dean should be completely incapacitated and they make it seem like it's Sam in charge, he inevitably ends up tied up to a chair and Dean basically saves himself like a fucking deus ex machina with bowed legs. It's honestly getting tiresome and frustrating to see. The original appeal of Supernatural was also, if not especially, the relationship between the brothers, how they were both fully competent and well rounded on their own but complimented each other on different and deeper levels.

And although one might argue I'm biased when it comes to Sam (my beloved, my one and only), I genuinely love Dean's character. How could I not? With his reckless bravery and quick intellect - he isn't given enough credit for - and the overly macho persona covering up his softie heart.

The thing is, I signed up for a story about Dean and Sam; hell, their reunion, the unwillingness to let each other go, was the catalyst of everything that happened so far basically, it's insanity to me to push one of them so completely to the sidelines all the damn time, basically relegating a whole fleshed out fucking main character as side kick, sacrificing prior years of writing and development, just because you have to put the other in the spotlight all the damn time.

#supernatural #spn rewatch #sam winchester #dean winchester #samdean #I'm just very unhappy with hos things are going after season 9 #don't let me get started about after Purgatory Dean #gosh #i needed to smack someone #also tbh Castiel too has been treate so poorly #the writing is just SO random at this point

175 notes · View notes

panharmonium · 6 months

Note

Hi! I love your Naruto thoughts and meta posts with all my heart and I want to ask your thoughts on something that has been on my mind literally since I was 13: what do you think about the relationship between Sasuke and Sakura? I went from being a hardcore shipper when I was a teenager, to being against any romantic relationship in Naruto after finishing the anime when I was in my early twenties. Nowadays I'm very into platonic love and depictions of friendship and I think the anime's obsession with forcing the "romantic interest" curse upon the main female character robbed us of... so much. There are a few wonderful moments in the anime where Sasuke and Sakura acknowledge each other, but because she's always "the girl with the crush", her actions are so often interpret as irrational or selfish by the fandom.

Hi @riemmetric! It's great to talk to you again! Sorry it's taken me so long to answer this; RL has been making demands of me lately and it took me way longer to finish writing this up than I wanted it to (then again, I knew from the minute I read your original ask that my reply was going to get long, so I suppose I should have predicted a delay XD)

It's funny, my sister once asked me to choose between Sasuke or Sakura for an “unpopular opinion” meme, and I ended up doing Sasuke solely because I think the negative fandom opinions about Sakura are so unhinged and divorced from the actual text that I wouldn’t even know where to start. People are entitled to dislike whatever characters they want, obviously, but there are some fandom takes that are, for me, so obviously rooted in bad faith viewings/readings that there’s no urge in me to discuss them. That said, since you asked, I’m happy to go into my own thoughts on this a bit, with the disclaimer for other potential readers that I only write about fandom things for my own personal enjoyment, not as a contribution to The Discourse. If you don’t like Sakura, great! I have no interest in changing your mind. Please consider this a sincere invitation to scroll on by and go enjoy whatever parts of the fandom appeal to you.

In general terms: I love Sasuke and Sakura’s relationship as much as I love all of the relationships in Team 7. If we’re talking about them specifically as a romantic couple, then I probably fall somewhere in the middle of the spectrum, because I do like them together in a post-canon (to be clear: non-Boruto) setting, after time has passed and they’ve continued to develop individually and reconnect with each other, but I also wouldn’t exactly call myself an intense “shipper,” in the sense that I have no interest in pulling things out from the text and incorrectly citing them as evidence that Sasuke has hidden romantic feelings for her during the canon period. He cares about her in the canon period, just like he cares about Naruto and Kakashi. That’s not up for interpretation; it’s the text. But Sasuke during the canon time period does not demonstrate specifically romantic interest in anyone.

[A note before people who might ship Sasuke with Someone Else emerge to rail against this statement - please just scroll past and continue enjoying fandom in whatever way is most fun for you. It is cool to ship whatever fanon thing you want; I think that’s great! But earnestly citing any loving or emotional thing Sasuke does re: various characters in this story (yes, Sakura included) as indicative of specifically romantic love isn’t supported by the text. I know there are always going to be enormous subsets of any fandom who insist that it is, and I'm certainly not going to barge into anyone else's space to complain about that (because other people having fun together is harmless and none of my business), but I'm not obligated to indulge it on my own blog, either.]

Anyway, that said - the reason why I love Sakura and Sasuke’s relationship (from here on out I’ll use “relationship” in a general, non-romantic sense) is precisely because Sakura isn’t just “the girl with the crush.” Sakura has an arc when it comes to Sasuke, and its trajectory moves in the exact opposite direction of “irrational” or “selfish.” She specifically goes from “the girl with the crush” to “the girl who steels herself and tries to put her personal feelings for Sasuke aside for the greater good” to “the girl who knows she can’t put her feelings aside, but who also knows full well that Sasuke doesn’t reciprocate them, and who still wants to save him regardless, because he matters to her as a person and a friend.”

[I'm putting the rest of this under a cut to save everyone's dash, and also to emphasize once again that this is a personal post on my personal blog which I wrote in response to a question from a personal acquaintance, the full content of which no one is obligated to read. I am not sending this post to random strangers and forcing them to look at it. I'm not even putting it in the character tags. I'm typing it up on my own blog and putting it under a cut. If you already know that you don't like Sakura, but you still click the link/read the post and then feel an urge to comment and complain, I am going to copy-paste this disclaimer and remind you that I specifically recommended that you scroll past and go have fun with fandom in your own way. Thanks in advance for responsibly curating your own fandom experience!]

So, from the top:

1. the girl with the crush

Sakura is, obviously, completely obsessed with Sasuke at the beginning of Part 1. She’s also deeply clueless about him and his history (bizarre though it is, the story seems to indicate that she initially doesn’t know what happened with his family, the same way young!Obito is initially clueless about Kakashi’s father). But what I like about Sakura and Sasuke’s Part 1 relationship is how this changes over time.

The critical scene that kicks this off happens right at the beginning of the manga, when she and Sasuke are talking by that bench - she complains about Naruto and blames his behavior on him being all alone/having no family to scold him; and even says she’s jealous that he doesn’t have parents to nag him all the time. This obviously triggers an outburst from Sasuke, who tells her she has no idea what loneliness means and that she “makes him sick”/she’s “annoying” (importantly, the exact same thing Sakura said to Naruto in anger earlier that day), which in turn prompts Sakura to reassess herself and wonder whether she’s been making Naruto feel this terrible all the time, too:

From that point on, it’s a process of her putting little pieces together. She still has a MAJOR crush, and she still acts like a twelve year-old, but as we approach the end of Part I, Sakura actually has a more accurate grasp on Sasuke’s current state of mind than Naruto does. Naruto is initially excited to fight Sasuke on top of the hospital, because he feels like Sasuke’s finally acknowledging him, whereas Sakura is the one who immediately recognizes that something is wrong about this situation. She is also the one who, after this fight, is concerned that Sasuke is really unwell and might do something drastic like run off in pursuit of the power Orochimaru promised him, but when she communicates this to Naruto, he assures her that this would NEVER happen:

(Sakura isn't convinced, though, because she goes to monitor the exit out of the village anyway.)

I’m not criticizing Naruto for his response here. I ADORE hearing him say that Sasuke is too strong to need Orochimaru, with such perfect confidence - I love seeing how much respect and admiration he has for Sasuke underneath all their fighting, because that’s the whole reason he’s always baiting Sasuke and yelling at him and claiming “you're not so great!” He looks up to Sasuke; he wants to be like Sasuke; he thinks Sasuke is awesome! (It’s that Obito @ Kakashi behavior, you know?) But the fact remains that he is clueless about what’s actually going on with Sasuke in Part 1, and he remains clueless(ly optimistic) for a long time.

(Eg, when he catches up to Sasuke during the retrieval arc and Sasuke climbs out of that cursed seal coffin, Naruto waves at him and calls "Come on, let's go!" as if Sasuke has been successfully rescued and is now going to come running home. Even in Part II, when Naruto hears that Sasuke killed Orochimaru, he beams and immediately says, “So he must be on his way back to the Leaf Village!” And everyone else in the room is like, “....,” because they know better. Naruto doesn’t yet fully understand [or doesn't want to accept] the extent to which Sasuke has willingly chosen this path, and it’s not until after Jiraiya’s death/the Pain attack/the Five Kage Summit that Naruto really starts to understand Sasuke more clearly, which is something he himself admits.)

Sakura, in Part 1, has access to more information about Sasuke - she’s there for his first dissociative monologue during the bells test, she’s there for the curse mark’s placement, she’s there for his first violent transformation in the Forest of Death - she is, in fact, the unwitting catalyst for it (“Sakura…who did this to you?”), and her compassion is the reason Sasuke is later able to overcome the curse mark’s influence - so she has a more accurate/complete picture of “how he’s doing,” for lack of a better phrase, whereas Naruto, who doesn’t know about the curse mark in the first place, is still in the dark. This means that Sakura is able to accurately discern that Sasuke is struggling more than Naruto realizes, and specifically to predict that he’s going to run away.

(This dynamic is then interestingly flipped in the back half of Part II, since at any point after the Five Kage Summit, Sakura doesn’t have access to extremely relevant [if currently questionable and unproven] details that would in any other circumstance inform her behavior).

Of course, just because she has more info in Part 1 doesn’t mean she has some kind of miraculous insight into Sasuke’s every thought and feeling. There are parts of her attempt to convince Sasuke to stay in the village that are as clueless as any of Naruto’s assumptions, and they showcase the kind of magical thinking common to childhood - like when she says that if he stayed with her, she could give him happiness, she’d do anything for him, even help him get his revenge - this idea that she herself can do something to make him feel better, that she can love him powerfully enough to defeat his pain - obviously none of that is rooted in realism.

Is this part of her approach irrational and immature and inadvertently self-centered? Of course it is! But it’s no more irrational and immature and inadvertently self-centered than Naruto’s stated plan to drag Sasuke back to the village even if he has to “break every bone in [his] body!”

Hating on Sakura for her Part 1 attempt to convince Sasuke to stay in the village while simultaneously lauding Naruto for his feels like a bad faith misread of what is, to me, pretty clear narrative intention. The story doesn’t at any point intend for us to see her begging him to stay as a selfish or conniving attempt to get something she wants. She’s begging him to stay for the same underlying reason that Naruto is: she cares about him. She thinks he’s making a mistake that will only cause him more pain in the end (she’s right) and she wants to make it so he feels less pain right now (she can’t. But she doesn’t understand that/isn’t able to admit that, and she’s willing to try ANYTHING that might help).

It’s critical that this farewell scene is set in front of that same bench from their first important confrontation - she references that day and how angry he got at her, and this time she tells him that she understands his reaction. She’s learned things and she recognizes how insensitive she was being back then (“I know what happened to your clan, Sasuke”), even though she still can’t fully grasp all the complexities of the situation. She tells him that him blowing up at her back then helped her understand what loneliness actually meant (as opposed to her previous shallow understanding of it), and she challenges him about his choice right now: "So that's it, you're choosing the lonely path?" And when she tells him that she'll be very lonely if he leaves, we're immediately shown a panel of Sasuke thinking of both his friends, with the very clear implication that if he goes through with this, he will be lonely without them, too - that he's still struggling with the idea of leaving them, no matter how hard he tries to pretend:

Sakura at this point knows that Sasuke isn’t interested in her the way she is in him, but she still wants to give him happiness, however fantastical and immature her ideas sound to us (and, I’m sure, to him). “I’ll do anything, even help you get your revenge/we'll have fun every day, and...and you'll be happy! I'll make sure of it!” - of course, it’s completely childish. It’s irrational. It’s ridiculous to think that any of this would ever be effective, but no more ridiculous than Naruto’s belief that he can simply break every bone in Sasuke’s body and keep him in the Leaf by force.

Both Naruto and Sakura are children who have a deeply oversimplified understanding of Sasuke’s situation. They both still think they can fix him themselves. They both think they can save him themselves. They both think they can convince (or force) him to do what they want, what they think is in his best interests. Both of them don’t yet understand that he has to want to come back, if it’s ever going to mean anything. Their attempts to keep him in the village are immature and unrealistic, yes. What they aren’t, however, is selfish, because neither Sakura nor Naruto are doing any of this with the intention of advancing their own interests. They’re only thinking about Sasuke - how to keep Sasuke safe, how to make Sasuke happy - even when neither of them are taking an approach that will actually work.

Naruto and Sakura are children. They’re afraid of losing somebody they care about. Their attempts to prevent that from happening are desperate and messy and ultimately ineffective, but they are also genuinely felt and rooted in a true desire to rescue Sasuke from his pain, which - and this is the single most important thing that should impact our viewing of Part 1 - is something that Sasuke RECOGNIZES. He doesn’t spend that agonizingly long moment bowed over Naruto’s defeated body so we can pretend he doesn’t understand that Naruto was just trying to help him. He doesn’t take the time to murmur, “Sakura…thank you,” before laying her out carefully on a bench, just so we can discount it and pretend that he doesn’t recognize and appreciate her genuine intention to make things better for him, however clumsy that attempt might have been.

2. the greater good

If Stage 1 Sakura is "the girl with the crush," then Stage 2 Sakura is a progression to “the girl who decides to put her feelings for Sasuke aside in order to protect innocent people, including (but certainly not limited to) Naruto.” She’s driven to this decision by interactions with Shikamaru, who all too recently had to grow up fast himself (“We're not kids anymore...we can't allow a war to break out between the Hidden Leaf and the Hidden Cloud because of Sasuke") and Sai, who risks his new friendship with Sakura and Team 7 in order to speak some hard truths and deliver one of my favorite lines in the whole story: “I don’t know what promise Naruto made to you, but it’s really no different than what was done to me. It’s like a curse mark.”

(INCREDIBLE. How can anybody be complaining about a season where Sai gets to say something that goes THIS HARD and Sakura LISTENS and takes DRAMATIC ACTION that actually propels the story forward in a meaningful way - )

[Okay, yeah, brief personal opinion interlude - it is just bonkers wild to me that there are people who complain about Sakura in the Five Kage Summit arc. That entire season is the greatest character arc she ever has. Literally she has never been more interesting and dynamic than in Season 10; it’s the first time she ever gets to be as deep and fascinating as the boys; what is everybody so worked up about? Oh, “she lied to Naruto that one time” - Sasuke joined infant-kidnapping baby-murdering human experimentation machine Orochimaru when he was twelve years old in order to (dare I say it????) selfishly pursue his personal goals and yet, somehow, we are still able to root for him. He abandoned his friends/allies to imprisonment and death (Suigetsu and Jūgo) or outright stabbed them in the chest himself (Karin) in order to (SELFISHLY) get what he wanted, and yet, somehow, we are still able to love him, understand him, and be on his side. Naruto is canonically not upset with Sakura about her lie after receiving context for the situation and I think we can probably take our cues from him without feeling the need to bring her up on war crimes; please calm down]

[Sorry, I just really love most of Season 10 and think it’s one of the best examples of how good this story can be when every single character gets to do something that matters (as opposed to things being all Naruto, all the time) so I get a little bit worked up over people complaining about some of the best writing Sakura ever gets. I don’t understand what certain elements of fandom want from her. People complain about her being “useless” and not doing anything that contributes to the story, but then they complain just as much when she does finally get to act decisively and have just as complex/dynamic an inner world as the boys. She’s “weak” for being unreasonably in love with Sasuke, but when she tries to be “strong” and put her love for him aside and eliminate him in order to protect Naruto and the rest of the world, she’s evil, because she should have been more understanding of his situation (despite the fact that she doesn’t KNOW anything about his situation). But then when she can’t go through with killing him after all because she cares about him too much despite the things he’s done, she’s not "compassionate" or "kind" or "a good friend," she’s “weak” again. Nothing Sakura does in S10 is more wrongheaded or rash than any of the batshit, buckwild things Naruto and Sasuke have done in the past (and will continue to do in the future), but when Naruto and Sasuke have big feelings or take bold action, it makes them interesting characters, whereas Sakura can’t breathe in anyone’s direction without being minutely scrutinized for moral impurities.]

Anyway. Back to a more measured response.

Every single piece of development Sakura has with regard to Sasuke in this season satisfies me so much. Her initial shock and disbelief at hearing that Sasuke had joined the Akatsuki? Good, appropriate. The fact that she starts to acknowledge the reality of what Sasuke’s done sooner than Naruto does? Also extremely appropriate, very in-character for both of them. Her taking Sai’s words to heart and deciding that the promise she asked Naruto to make when they were children is causing him to suffer and she has to relieve him of that burden? Juicy! AND thematically significant (promises!!!! the burden that a promise places on a person, especially when it can't be kept - we've seen that before in this story and we'll see it again). Her anguished pivot from wanting to protect Sasuke to realizing that she has a responsibility to protect the countless innocents who will die because of the war he’s trying to start? HELLO THIS IS INCREDIBLE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. Her knocking out the classmates who agreed to help her so they don’t have to share in her burden (and so the only person Naruto will hate when it’s over is her)? BRUH. Her being so committed and focused on her goal of saving innocents and protecting Naruto (not just from being harmed by Sasuke/the Akatsuki, but by the possibility that Naruto will someday have to hurt Sasuke himself) that she tries to take everything on by herself and walks into a confrontation that she absolutely cannot win?? INCREDIBLE. (Literally the first time I watched this, I said, “Finally!!! It’s Sakura’s turn to go off the rails!” I laughed with my sister about how Kakashi isn’t even mad, because Naruto and Sasuke have been pulling stunts like this for years and Sakura was way overdue for her own meltdown.) And then, after Kakashi intervenes in the fight - Sakura barreling back into the battle when she realizes he’s going to take on the burden of killing Sasuke himself in order to spare her and Naruto the horror - “I can’t let Kakashi-sensei bear this burden!” I love her for that.

And then, of course, in the end - her not being able to do hurt Sasuke after all. Despite committing herself to the act, despite forcing herself to put her feelings for him aside, despite resolving to stop him from starting a war and killing innocent people, she can’t harm him. She cares about him too much. This, too, is thematically significant - think about Itachi’s “you don’t have enough hatred” - she doesn’t have enough hatred to kill someone she cares about, even if it seems like he deserves it, even if would be the right thing to do to protect others. She can’t do it, and Sasuke almost kills her for her compassion.

I love the dynamic this sets up between her and Sasuke, for a few reasons:

1) Personally, I think Sasuke respects Sakura much more for trying to kill him than he would have if she’d just tried to talk him out of his behavior or beg him to come home (a la their original confrontation in Part 1). This is the first significant interaction he’s had with Sakura in years, and the fact that she does something SO contrary to his memory of her is an important demonstration of the fact that she’s not the same girl she used to be. Sasuke spends a lot of time after his defection declaring to his old team “I’ve changed; I’m not that person anymore,” but this is one of the moments where he’s forced to acknowledge that his teammates have changed, too. Time didn’t just stop for them when he left. While he was turning into someone new, so were they. They grew up without him, and his old memories of them can’t encompass the whole picture of who they are now.

(This is a little tangential, but in general, I love the spectrum of reactions that Naruto, Sakura, and Kakashi have in this sequence, and the way that all of them are ultimately messages Sasuke needs to hear. Sasuke - who we know textually regrets what he did here, who apologizes to Sakura for it later - for “everything,” in fact - needs Naruto’s aggressively optimistic open-arms policy, yes, needs that potential, that unconditional possibility of return. He also needs Sakura’s refusal to let him hurt her friends and start a war that will kill thousands of people, needs her surprisingly ruthless attempt to take him down; needs just as much her failure to do so, because it shows him that she still loves him too much to kill him even as she condemns him. And he needs Kakashi’s grim line in the sand, needs someone who very possibly won't hesitate like Sakura (despite the horrifying personal cost), someone who will try to reach him but also won't let him escape and become the next generation’s Orochimaru, who won't let him cause untold suffering to untold numbers of people just because a teacher loved him too much to stop him when he had the chance.

(And then even Kakashi chooses not to deliver a killing blow when he has the opportunity -)

(I know that in fandom people are more likely to be all, “oh, Naruto Good, everybody else Bad,” but I don’t think the narrative frames Sakura or Kakashi as “worse” than Naruto in any way. The story goes out of its way to make it clear how desperately they don’t want to hurt Sasuke and how much they care about him. And [this is just my interpretation, so obviously I won’t claim it as fact], I personally think that Sasuke - Sasuke, who, looking back, can see how lost he was then and how tortured he would have been if he’d gone through with many of his plans - would be grateful to Sakura and Kakashi for making an attempt to stop him when he couldn’t stop himself.)

2) On the other side of this, the fact that Sakura wasn’t able to deliver the killing blow means a lot. Sasuke was incapacitated under that bridge; he was completely at her mercy - but she stopped with the kunai an inch from his back. She couldn’t kill him, even though she knew that he was completely willing to kill her (because he'd attempted to Chidori-assassinate her from behind just a few minutes ago). That’s huge! Sasuke is too out of his head right now to process this or understand it, but later, it's going to matter. She stayed her hand. She spared his life. She loved him too much to hurt him, even when he’d given her every reason to take him down. She hesitated, and he almost killed her for it, but her inability to strike him ultimately gave him yet another chance to come home, another chance to get better, another chance to have a life outside of his pain. Despite everything, some part of her still hadn’t really given up on him, and that knowledge will matter later, when he’s finally able to acknowledge it.

The point of all this is to say that I really have no complaints about Sakura and Sasuke’s dynamic in their S10 confrontation. This season is the point where Sakura fully grows past her “girl with a crush” stage and into her “shinobi must make very harsh decisions” adulthood, but it never means that she doesn’t care about the person she’s trying to take down. Her ultimate inability to deliver the killing blow remains a dangling lifeline for her relationship with Sasuke, an open door that Sasuke is able to walk through at the end of the story (literally, in fact, when Sakura opens that portal for him and saves him from Kaguya’s desert prison, and figuratively, too, when Sasuke apologizes to her).

3. she only wants to save you

The last stage in their relationship is what Sakura settles into during the war arc. She started off Part 1 being just a girl with a crush, then tried to harden her heart and put her feelings for Sasuke aside in service of the greater good, but she was unable to actually follow through and kill him, and because of that, what she’s come to accept by the war arc is actually two things: that 1) Sasuke truly is willing to let her die if it furthers his goals, and 2) she wants to save him anyway.

She has no intention of pursuing Sasuke romantically. She knows full well that Sasuke isn’t interested in her. She even knows that Sasuke isn’t really on their side (there’s a great scene where Sai questions Sakura about Sasuke’s return, and she reassures him that everything is fine, and Sai sadly thinks to himself “even I can tell your smile is fake”). She’s well-aware that Sasuke didn’t try to help her when Madara stabbed her. She’s well-aware that he left her to die in the lava pit. She’s also well-aware that none of this is enough to make her stop loving him. He doesn’t have to care about her - she still cares about him. She still wants to help him. She still wants to save him.

This is not hidden, hard-to-parse character development. It’s explicitly articulated on the page:

Sakura’s not trying or wanting to make you hers! She only wants to save you.

I’m not sure if people look at this last confrontation and unquestioningly take Sasuke at his word (as if we haven’t just read 71 volumes/watched 700 episodes showing us how how painfully distorted his thinking is), or if they stop reading/watching before the end of the scene, or if they don’t understand that Sasuke saying something doesn’t make that statement an accurate representation of reality. The entire point of this scene is to show us how deeply mistaken Sasuke is about Sakura (and, by extension, the rest of Team 7). He’s locked into a false pattern of thinking. His single-minded focus on revenge and destruction has blinded him to the unconditional love his friends feel for him; he’s become so accustomed to using others and being used that he can’t understand or accept that someone would care about him without needing a reason, without needing him to love them back, without needing to receive something from him in exchange.

Sakura’s not trying or wanting to make you hers! She only wants to save you.

Sasuke matters to Sakura as more than a love interest. He always has. She does love him romantically, yes, but she doesn’t only love him romantically, and her desire to help him is not and has never been contingent on him returning her feelings, romantically or otherwise. Sasuke isn’t able to acknowledge that in this scene, but that doesn’t mean we’re supposed to just sit back and agree with his warped perspective. Kakashi is the one who’s explicitly positioned as the voice of the narrative here. We, as the audience, are supposed to recognize that Kakashi is the one telling us the truth.

[tangential thing 1: You don’t have to love Sakura's last plea to Sasuke here. It’s not my favorite, either - the best part, other than Kakashi’s speech at the end, is the moment after Kakashi collapses when Sakura’s expression changes from pained uncertainty to pure rage, when she grits her teeth together - when I first saw that, I almost leapt out of my seat like “Oh my god. She’s finally going to let him have it. It’s finally happening - ” I wanted that so badly, and I still think it would have been a more effective writing choice for Sakura’s last words to lean more into her anger at the suffering Sasuke is causing all of them (himself included!) and less into yet another of Kishimoto’s “let me have Sakura articulate what a shame it is that she can’t do as much as Naruto despite the fact that I literally just went through a major reveal sequence in the war to show that she’s caught up to the boys; I can’t make up my mind about whether I want her to progress or not” - it’s extremely frustrating (and it's something he does at the very end of the S10 Team 7 reunion, too, which is the ONLY moment of S10 that falls flat for me). But at the same time, even if there are ways this sequence could be more satisfying, it doesn’t change the fact that her plea to him is not remotely motivated by a desire to be with him romantically and not anything to condemn her for.]

[tangential thing 2: I do like how she remembers that moment when Sasuke says “Thank you.” That panel precedes her saying “If there’s even a tiny corner of your heart that thinks about me…” (which I’m sure is one of the things that people like to criticize about this scene, aka “oh she’s sooooo self-centered” etc), but that particular line of dialogue is preceded by that particular flashback panel for a reason: Sakura knows that Sasuke DOES think about her. He thinks about all of them. Sakura remembers that “thank you,” and it reminds her that despite everything Sasuke has done and said since, despite all evidence to the contrary, she knows in her bones that his expression of gratitude back then was genuine. He cared about her once. He cared about all of them. She’s trying to reach the part of him that still does, if it exists.]

[tangential thing 3: The fact that Kakashi says “she suffers from loving you,” and it triggers Sasuke to remember his own family - thinking about how much he suffered (and still suffers) from loving them - “Perhaps…those are the ties to a failed past” - the idea that it’s not worth it to have bonds if it means you suffer this much…that it’s too difficult, it’s too painful, and if Sakura and the rest of Team 7 were smarter they would just give it up (all Sasuke knows how to do now is sever potential bonds before they can hurt him; so why aren’t Sakura and the rest of his teammates doing that, why can’t they let it go, why are they making this so hard - ) << yeah, he clearly doesn't care about her/them at all.]

4. the shadow of my family

This has all been a really long way to answer the original question, but the short response to “What do you think about the relationship between Sasuke and Sakura?” is “I really care about it,” just like I really care about the relationship between Sasuke and Naruto, just like I really care about the relationship between Sasuke and Kakashi. And I don’t think the story ever asks me to choose between them.

I’m not sure whether it’s the impact of Boruto-era “canon” that gets in the way of other people approaching things this way (I don’t consider sequel material when I evaluate the original story), or if it’s Kishimoto’s frequent disinterest in/disrespect towards female characters, which yes, does sometimes make it harder, or if it's a shipping thing (bane of my existence), or some combination of factors, but for me, taking one member of Team 7 out of the equation hobbles the rest of the story. I can’t read/watch Naruto while hating one of the protagonists and loving the other three. It doesn’t work like that for me. The story wasn’t written that way, and there’s nothing in the text that would cause me to receive it that way.

That doesn't mean there's anything wrong with disliking one of the main foursome (or any character, for that matter) - obviously we're all going to have different preferences, and everyone is free to enjoy or reject whatever parts of a story they want, or to like or dislike whatever characters they want. I know that some people have more fun disregarding canon and doing their own thing, which is fine. My own personal zone of enjoyment comes from receiving the story as closely to how I think it was intended to be read as I can, and personally, when I look at this particular story, what I see is that all the members of Team 7 clearly demonstrate their love for Sasuke in ways that he himself later recognizes and acknowledges. All of them are driven by their desire to save him and their unwillingness to hurt him. All of them make repeated choices to chase after him when he runs away, to trust him when he hasn't exactly earned it, to give him another chance when he doesn't appear to deserve it. ALL of them, not just Naruto, do these things multiple times throughout the story, and Sasuke owes his life (and thus his eventual recovery) to ALL of them, many times over. Kakashi disobeys Hokage-elect Danzō and breaks the law to negotiate for Sasuke's life with a foreign head of state. Sakura and Kakashi both have opportunities to kill Sasuke in the Land of Iron, and they choose to spare him instead. Kakashi stops Sasuke from killing his only friends at two different points in the story, which would have been a mistake Sasuke couldn't have recovered from. Sasuke would have died in Kaguya's desert dimension if Sakura hadn't saved him (Sakura, who knew that Sasuke wasn't even truly on her side yet, who knew he'd abandoned her for dead multiple times already that day). Kaguya's bone bullet would have killed Sasuke too, if Kakashi, with his intention to die in Sasuke's place, hadn't leapt in front of it (Kakashi, who also knew that Sasuke wasn't fully on their side yet, who also knew that Sasuke had abandoned him for dead earlier that day). Sasuke and Naruto would have BOTH died in the Final Valley if Sakura and a severely injured Kakashi hadn't chased after them to heal their injuries.

Remove any one member of Team 7, and Sasuke never makes it home. Without the combined efforts of all three of his teammates, he doesn't survive. That’s the way it should be, thematically, for a story whose first and most foundational premise was the importance of teamwork, and since Sakura was just as essential to that framework as everyone else, I’m just as invested in her relationship with Sasuke as I am in his relationship with everyone else. You can’t remove one leg from a four-legged stool without damaging the integrity of the entire structure, and for me, discounting any single member of Team 7 irreparably damages the integrity of the entire story.

TL;DR: I love all of the Team 7 relationships, including Sakura and Sasuke's, because despite what some segments of fandom seem to believe, the text of the story never gives me any reason not to.

#naruto #meta #replies #anyway that's that! hopefully that is a helpful answer #thank you for the question! i honestly don't think i would have ever gotten around to writing about this if i hadn't been directly asked #i love talking about the stories i enjoy (obviously; we all do; that's why we're here)#but i'm usually ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ about responding to takes that blatantly misread the narrative to justify hating a particular character or ship #mostly because a) it's whatever. as long as people mind their own business and leave me to enjoy myself they can do what they want #and b) some opinions are so divorced from the actual text that they're not worth discussing #like. what's the point of responding to random internet posts saying that sakura was selfishly pursuing sasuke as a lover the entire time #when that is textually and provably not the case?#if you're that committed to experiencing things in direct contradiction to what the narrative is asking of us then just go ahead #is it mildly annoying to me? sure. but so are lots of things and it's better to just let stuff go #like - i initially planned to take this piece of meta all the way up through sakura and sasuke's last scene together #the one where he tells her 'maybe next time' and finally reclaims and redefines itachi's forehead tap (INCREDIBLE. THIS SCENE.)#but ultimately i changed my mind because everything i wrote for that last section was coming out too harsh #i generally prefer to talk about fandom stuff in a chill/friendly approachable way #but i kept thinking about the most obscenely & disrespectfully inaccurate read of that scene i'd ever seen #and i couldn't figure out how to talk about it in a non-scathing way #that scene and the one where naruto gives sasuke's headband back are the ONLY well-written things about the finale of naruto #they are SO perfectly constructed and i can't respond to people slandering either one without feeling an urge to kill #so i just deleted it. partially because again - this is fandom; it's not that serious; people can do what they want #but also because i know i get extra frustrated about people picking over the text and plucking out isolated bits and pieces #to contort into blatantly misinterpreted mutant shapes that 'confirm' whatever pre-existing judgments or ships they had #instead of experiencing the story as a cohesive whole & keeping in mind the greater context of what it's always been trying to communicate #people on this website say 'we all interpret things differently :)' as if it means no one can ever be wrong about what a text is saying #newsflash: not all interpretations of a text are valid. things can't in fact mean whatever you want them to mean.#the ***story*** persists and exists even if the author is dead to you #if you choose to ignore that then that's fine; it's just fandom; who cares. but i'm not going to pretend you're 'analyzing' anything.#(ok now i'm really done. you can see why i deleted this section XD)

43 notes · View notes

optiwashere · 5 months

Note

How do you manage to write smut that's like, actually arousing? What's the secret?

Well, first of all thank you! I'm glad you enjoy it, I really am. Happy to hear from you here as well 💜

Also, I'll let you in on my secret — I can't stand almost anything I write after it's posted. I see nothing but the flaws, grammatical choices, and technical foibles. This extends triple, quadruple, to smut. So if you're feeling the same kinda way, that your writing feels somehow off, then just know you're not alone.

I could give some pointers, but I don't really know how much benefit anyone will get hearing these from me of all people. But in my opinion it's a lot of the non-smut aspects that highlight the smut and make it shine. So here ya go.

Keep it in-character. I'm not out here talking as an authority on anyone's characterization, nor am I saying I'm some master of it and there are plenty of people out there with differing opinions, so take this with a colossal mountain of salt. But you should focus on making the voices, internal thoughts, and prose in keeping with the POV character. This is something called "POV control" and it's a very useful skill. Be able to flow in and out of a character's POV as the need arises. How Shadowheart interacts with sex is very different from Karlach is different from Orin, for example.

Strong focus on dialogue. This is a sorta addendum to the first point. Characters shouldn't suddenly turn silent when they're having sex. That is, unless that's the point of the story! They should also be speaking in-character even (or especially) during sex. Also, "porn dialogue" is something that gets brought up a lot in writing, and I think we all know it when we read it. That being said, people in the real world do say things during sex that, out of context, are hilarious. So it's a balancing act.

Fitting descriptions. This is actually one of the more important ones! If a scene is very romantic and meant to be light and fluffy, maybe avoid words for genitals altogether and focus entirely on simple visual aesthetics (how moonlight plays on a body, to give an example). If it's meant to be rough and focused on bodies or the mechanics of the scene, ham it up on those words. This also isn't a binary. Things flow back and forth all the time.

Firm language. I don't mean, like, power dynamics "firm." I'm talking about a willingness to use the words that fit the descriptions and sticking to it. Some people despise certain words, but other people will find the alternatives hilarious and completely tone-breaking. Find the words you like and stick to them; consistency gives your voice strength.

Don't try to appease everybody. You just can't. You have to write what you personally enjoy reading/writing/doing/thinking about, and go with it. If you try to cater to everyone's whims with any of the above, you'll wind up with a beige platter of nothingness. That doesn't mean you can't explore other tones or flavors, but don't try to do too much in one story.

Focus on emotions. Emotions could mean anything from love to lust to anxiety to fear to uncertainty and so on and so forth. My strategy is to center a fic on a theme/emotion that resonates with the characters involved and then I explore the smut around that central point. Revisit the idea between the action. Show how the characters' feelings around the theme change or how they're reaffirmed.

#hey you can ask me things!#random rambling about writing #i just write a lot i'm not the queen of anything (re: an anon that I fear answering calling me the queen of shadowheart smut)#everyone's voice will be different #so just remember this is My Style and not a Universal Constant #that bit in the “keep it in-character” bullet point is not a call for comments on my characterization #it's just a note on what I've noticed and the people I've spoken to OUTSIDE OF this very curated space #a space that is obviously much more likely to enjoy my characterization #so I'm also not saying I don't appreciate folks' comments on the matter! I love hearing that y'all enjoy my characterizations 💜#I had some more Tips 'n' Tricks but they wound up being personal quirks more than anything else tbh

22 notes · View notes

plusultraetc · 6 months

Note

Saw the tags on the Toshinori post and do you have more to share?? Any insights? If so I’d welcome hearing them 😭 He really is so self-sacrificial and it hurts but it’s truly at the core of who he is

This has been sitting in my inbox for almost a week because I needed to make a futile effort at organizing my thoughts into something coherent--but this is as organized as they're going to get for now! Thank you so so much for the ask though bc I do love to yell about MHA <3

(Obligatory reminder that I'm watching this show in such a confusing order so if what I'm about to rant about has been addressed before and I'm harping on it unnecessarily I Am Sorry.)

(For anyone curious, this is the post btw)

SO. It feels relevant to mention that my sister and I were talking about All Might in the first place because we were talking about MHA Moments That Haunt Us. For me, it's the 'I am not here' sign hanging around the neck of the All Might statue in Kamino Ward after the Paranormal Liberation War. It literally lives in my brain rent-free 24/7 365 days a year, especially with the AM vs AFO fight being relatively fresh in my mind. The reversal of All Might's catchphrase and all it represents hurts, but to display it at the site of his 'last stand' in Kamino? That's brutal.

All Might vs All For One and how that rematch plays out is so so important to the story for so many reasons, but one of them is that the fight itself is a sacrifice. Toshinori gives everything he has, short of his life, to defeat All For One. He gives up his physical strength, his public image as the unbeatable Symbol of Peace, and, effectively his Quirk ("Goodbye, All For One. Goodbye, One For All" haunts my every waking moment, still!)

This battle is also the culmination of years of All Might's life and heroic philosophy (because Toshinori has been both practicing AND preaching self-sacrifice in the name of the greater good since we met him. It's what he thinks a hero does). Kamino is the sacrifice to end all sacrifices, if you will. Yes, he does get to walk away from the fight with AFO, but he walks away irrevocably different, almost unrecognizable. He's forced to totally change his focus and his mindset and his life. Everything he has given up is made literally visible in the deterioration of his body.

But most most importantly, All Might's sacrifice at Kamino was... all for nothing. Even if AM defeated him in that moment, All For One is free less than a year later. The world is in shambles. People are afraid, and their faith in heroes is crumbling. Heroes are afraid, and this time, they have no idealized symbol to rally behind. When Dostoevsky wrote "Your worst sin is that you have destroyed and betrayed yourself for nothing," he was talking about All Might btw.

Toshinori gave this fight (and his career, and being All Might) everything he had, and it still wasn't enough. He sacrificed so much of himself, and so much of how he perceived himself and his purpose, and he didn't even save the world. He just bought them time--and not much of it. I think that's why he's so desperate to keep fighting, no matter the cost, no matter what condition he's in--even 'quite literally half-dead.' He can't let Kamino be the Symbol of Peace's final stand, because Kamino was ultimately for nothing. Instead of saving the world, it has been reframed through the sign on the statue as All Might abandoning the world. And ever since then, he's been scrambling to prove that he is still here.

(There's also probably something here about Sir Nighteye telling him that he was going to die. Since Nighteye used his Quirk on him, Toshinori has been anticipating sacrificing his life for good. Knowing that his entire hero career is effectively a fight to the death has probably maximized his self-sacrificial tendencies.)

#ask #yagi toshinori #bnha all might #mha all might #love of my LIFE #i had more bullet points to include about all might's philosophy of self-sacrifice as both a hero and a teacher #but then i was writing random notes about all might as a product of hero society as opposed to a pillar of it and i felt like that one vide #of the old man going '90% of the time i have no idea what the hell i'm talking about'#it wasn't strictly relevant to this ask but maybe one day it will be it's own post bc toshinori messes me up when i think about him #for longer than 0.5 seconds #this is so word vomit i'm so sorry #liza blather #AND ANOTHER THING. a lot of the pros are self-sacrificial to an extreme (i made a web weave abt it) but all might is one of the few #who actually makes it his PHILOSOPHY. like he passes on the idea of setting yourself on fire to keep others warm as a Good Plan #which is NOT a criticism of him OR his fault it's what he LEARNED to do just like #i can't really blame the ua faculty for the sports fest as messed up as it was bc like. half of them are probably ua alumni. they #probably had their own sports festival. this is just like. not registering as abnormal to them.#okay now i will stop #one thing about me is if i'm not talking about kamino i'm talking about the sports festival #and on the off chance i'm not talking about either i'm talking about the joint training arc

23 notes · View notes

isfjmel-phleg · 10 months

Text

Here's the tentative outline of the TSG paper, as okayed by the professor whom I've been discussing the project with:

intro to the trend of recent adaptations/retellings reframing TSG as a story about grief

an assertion that the book is really about healing from childhood e m o t i o n a l n e g l e c t (CEN) (my thesis?)

defining CEN and distinguishing it from traditional grief

an analysis of CEN in the text

how this interacts with what these adaptations/retellings are doing

conclusion about the importance of the text’s depiction of CEN and why it’s worth acknowledging/exploring

It's a relief to pin this down and be able to go into this with some kind of focus. I've already got a start on the first paragraph. I'm trying a method of drafting by just constructing the basic argument and then working in all the evidence and research later. My college papers tended to take forever to write because I drafted them with Finished Perfection in mind for each sentence, which is stressful and easy to get bogged down with. We'll see how it works. The paper needs to be completed by October, probably the end of the month at the very latest, but I'd like to get it finished in enough time to fully polish and not have to stress about a tight deadline.

I can do this. Probably. It's been a few years but I might still have it in me.

#random personal stuff #of course I write mini-essays here all the time!#but those aren't presented as scholarly with proper citations and you guys presumably forgive me if I'm not clever enough #Dr. B. (the one who tried to rope me into that roundtable presentation) is already talking about #trying to get some of my old papers published in a journal #or working on a book #she is so full of enthusiasm and confidence and grandiose ideas that it's both impressive and kind of terrifying #don't know if I really want to do any of these things #I mean even assuming a journal would want my work (which isn't really on that level I think) what would be the point #I used to want to be an academic but lost that after the thesis and everything before that #the last time I was working with a professor who wanted me to do Grand Things...it didn't end well #and of course Dr. B. is nothing like That Man and would not have his motivations #but all the same I don't want to commit to anything on this level for the foreseeable future #I'm just writing a paper so I can present it at a convention because that's about the only thing I can do that makes anyone proud #got to justify my existence somehow

21 notes · View notes

lyxchen · 5 months

Text

Tonight I dreamed that for some reason I was helping David Tennant and his youngest child with french homework (even though there was no french in the homework?) but we couldn't really solve it and then after everyone was asleep I had an idea how to maybe solve it so I made like three notes on what could be the solution in pencil next to the exercise but my parents found out and got like super mad at me because "you shouldn't do someone else's homework" even though it was a child's homework and I didn't even solve anything. And the whole time I was like "omg I helped David Tennant and his child with homework!!!" and then in the end I drew something about how I don't like it when people make out in public. In hindsight it had nothing to do with the homework but in my dream it somehow did. Also there was a castle and a big meadow and a wooden cabin at some point but I don't know how that fits in with the rest of the dream

8 notes · View notes

homicidal-slvt · 8 months

Text

I have this issue where I see people talking about how bad others interpretations of certain characters are and then I start going "Oh no what if my interpretations suck. What if people hate them. Am I mischaracterizing and don't realize it??? Oh god oh god oh god"

And then I just panic, burn myself out and become unable to write.

#vee's random thoughts go brr #being trapped in this flesh prison with an over emotional brain is my own personal hell #I cannot escape my own thoughts and it's killing my ability to be creative #I'm terrified of doing something wrong even when I've done NOTHING wrong to the point I drive myself into a hole #Lately I just am hating every COD thing I write and just want to drop all of it and focus on Resident Evil instead #So many issues in this lil body

15 notes · View notes

pekoeboo · 9 months

Text

hhh i've had like. no drive to work on any art or writing projects. ;n; my heart is still so invested in the stories and characters I've created, but the motivation to take those feelings and put it into some form of content is next to nil. i don't know why it's been like that but it's kinda sad :c

don't get me wrong - i'm happy with most of the things i've created lately, but it's also been this strange game of doubt and comparison going on in my head when it comes to actually sharing what I make. there are a lot of pieces of art and writing that i just haven't posted because i feel like it's not in a place where it's good enough for anyone other than myself. the idea of editing and actually finishing some projects so that i can make sense of them online is overwhelming even tho i would love to just... get some of those ideas out for anyone who might be interested in hearing about them, you know?

anyway. probably just need to let myself take some kind of break?? idk what that would really entail at this point tho. it's just been a weird mental state that I need to work out i guess.

#so like. not quite a hiatus but some Secret Other Thing #i'm hoping the motivation to actually finish projects and share them will come back to me #but right now i think i need to either just focus on drawing or writing stuff without any intention of sharing it #or maybe i shouldn't draw/write at all for a while instead #but i'd still love to talk about the characters and stories with y'all??#unfortunately that really only seems to work best within like personal messages between friends or whatever #i've tried posting random content about characters on here but it feels weird without any art to go along with it #(like when i wrote that post about khalan's backstory that one time)#so i just dont talk about them at all outside of that because i can't tell if ppl would actually want to hear about them #and even if ppl do i have no idea where to start without any prompts or specific questions to build off of kdjfg #anyway #i'm rambling now oops #dont know what the point of this post is but i'll probably delete it eventually #my ramblings #text post

7 notes · View notes

threadsun · 9 months

Text

I've said it before but I'll say it again:

I don't answer requests/questions where you send me a whole hyper-specific scenario. I'm doing this for free and for fun, I'm not taking your fic commission disguised as a prompt request. If you want me to write about your specific oc/non-canon characters you've made up, my prices are 5¢ per word

#sunshine #probably gonna actually make a commission post and page at some point soon #but yeah I'm writing y'all genuinely thousands of dollars worth of free content #but I draw the line when people start sending me wholeass fic summaries to write #especially if you want me to write romance between your OC and a random character who isn't even part of any of the things I write for #at that point you're just exploiting my generosity

17 notes · View notes

Last Seen Blogs

axiian19-art

Axiian19

bompopleseoblog-blog

Untitled

kawaiiobjectpirate

Untitled

razytherazy

Razy the Blog

fastreviews

Fast Reviews