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11cupid-tarot11 · 2 days

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Habits of your future spouse that might annoy you 😅

1 -> 3

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Love y'all

- Cupid 𖥔 ࣪ ᥫ᭡ꗃ⋆࣪.

Pile 1- Four of swords, Seven of wands, two of cups and Queen of coins.

So I'm seeing this person will annoy you with how closed off they are. They don't let their emotions show easily, it's hard getting this person to really settle down and be grounded. I don't think this person doesn't ever want to settle down, I think they're just scared of commitment but more specifically love, getting close to someone. Maybe they've been hurt by people before, rather it be an ex who left them feeling guarded or just walls being up because they think how cuel the world is, whatever it may be they feel they have to protect these feelings from everyone, and that will annoy you I'm assuming lol. You might not really understand this person's intentions at first, you might think they're disinterested or you wanting to move the relationship to a more serious level and they could be resistant, really confusing, like you just don't know what this person's next move is. But this energy is really frustrating! Like, either you love me or don't srsly man 😭 I see this person really does want you, they are serious about you and I think that scares them because again they're so closed off and guarded, but they really do worship you. They might think you're also out of their "league" I'm hearing, there could be some insecurities around their ego as well.

I'm mostly picking up on that and not much of anything else? I wanted this pick a pile to be a little longer but it seems this is all spirit wants to flow through for now lol.

I hope you enjoyed! See you next time, don't forget to do the pole at the bottom!

Other messages- Cancer, Pisces, 14, I'm sorry. (Seems like someone wants to apologize for something? I heard "I'm sorry" multiple times during this.)

Pile 2- Ace of coins, Five of wands, The magician, Eight of cups in reverse.

This person tends to be fixed on money at times, it might annoy you how materialistically this person might be. I'm also seeing this person likes to take on battles on their own, will fight anyone on earth for you and you don't have to move fingernail, they like to try and be the solution to all of your problems and this will annoy, it could be you just hate how this person makes all of your problems their own to the fullest which is a nice trait to have but it's also not healthy. This person could have a hard time letting toxic people go, they have a bit of a people pleasing energy. With the Magician card I'm getting this person really likes fixing everyone's problems, having their "Aha!" Moments and that might really irritate you, you could help this person coming out of that energy and teach them it's okay to not be everyone's hero, that it's not their job all the time to give themselves away so much.

I hope you enjoyed this reading! Don't forget to do the poll below! See you soon 🩷

Other messages- Aries, Leo, Sagittarius.

Pile 3- Three of coins, Knight of Swords, Three of cups and Five of swords

This person would rather sit in silence and struggle rather than ask for help. This person could like going out and partying a lot or maybe likes taking you on dates out doors a lot in crowded places, you could be more introverted than them so this annoys you a bit lol.

I think this person might have a temper they're still learning to control? Like I think they're a calm person but as soon as they get ticked off their words cut deep, and they know that actually.

Maybe this person has a lot of talent, you see a lot of potential in this person or they share lots of good ideas with you and it might annoy you that this person doesn't believe in themselves to finally turn their dreams into reality? I see you really want the best for this person so it might really annoy you that you know they're not giving it all they've got, you see how far they can go, they just need that extra bit of encouragement from you!

Hi! Hope you liked this reading! Don't forget to do the poll at the bottom please! See you soon! 🩷

Other messages- Gemini, Libra, Aquarius, blue, water, wings and 14.

#tarot community #18+ tarot #pac love reading #pac tarot #pick a card #spirituality #tarot #tarot cards #tarot reading #tarot love reading #tarot messages

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en-geneisaxx · 3 days

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'Please don't say that this is the end of us...'

Pairings: Husband!Hoon x fem!reader

Warnings: Swearing (you're gonna be on a rollercoaster of emotions lol)

Feat. Jay, Heeseung and Jake of Enhypen, Yeji (Sunghoon's sister), Jin Ae (Y/n and Sunghoon's child),

AND

Reesa (@dollywons), Haze (@pockettwinzz), Reina (@rinbowaman), Rin (@diorsyun), Nessa (@heeslomll), Aeri (@heeslut4life), Aria (@jaylaxies), Julia (@jak3slut), Rae (@hoonieshoneymain) (SORRY IF I GOT YOUR NAMES WRONG 😭)

Tagging my moots who wanted to read: @pockettwinzz @diorsyun @rinbowaman @heeslomll @heeslut4life @hoonieshoneymain @sungvrhs

Previous parts can be found here:

Part 6

Part 5

Part 4

Part 3

Part 2

Part 1

Preview

A/n: HI HI HIIII EVERYONE!! I'M SO SORRY I HAVEN'T BEEN POSTING MUCH FICS, I HAD A WRITER'S BLOCK MOMENT FOR A SECOND, SO FORGIVE ME 😭 ONCE THE POLL RESULTS COME, I'LL BE FOCUSING ON MAKING A NEW FIC BASED ON THAT PERSON. PLEASE SEND OPINIONS OR THE TYPE OF FIC YOU WOULD WANT FOR IT (I have no idea who's winning rn, don't wanna vote 😅) BUT YH, TYSM TO EVERYONE FOR YOUR SUPPORT, HOPE YOU ENJOY!!

Likes, reblogs and/or following me will be much appreciated!! 😚

Last chapter, part 7:

'𝒀/𝒏, 𝒊𝒇 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒉𝒂𝒅 𝒂 𝒄𝒉𝒂𝒏𝒄𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆 𝒔𝒊𝒏𝒈𝒍𝒆 𝒂𝒈𝒂𝒊𝒏 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒍𝒐𝒐𝒌 𝒇𝒐𝒓 𝒂 𝒎𝒂𝒏, 𝒘𝒉𝒐 𝒘𝒐𝒖𝒍𝒅 𝒊𝒕 𝒃𝒆?'

'𝑯𝒂𝒉𝒂, 𝒘𝒉𝒂𝒕'𝒔 𝒘𝒊𝒕𝒉 𝒕𝒉𝒆 𝒘𝒆𝒊𝒓𝒅 𝒒𝒖𝒆𝒔𝒕𝒊𝒐𝒏𝒔, 𝑱𝒂𝒌𝒆? 𝑰 𝒔𝒘𝒆𝒂𝒓, 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒔𝒌 𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒎 𝒂𝒍𝒍 𝒕𝒊𝒎𝒆... 𝑾𝒆𝒍𝒍, 𝑰'𝒍𝒍 𝒂𝒍𝒘𝒂𝒚𝒔 𝒄𝒉𝒐𝒐𝒔𝒆 𝑺𝒖𝒏𝒈𝒉𝒐𝒐𝒏.'

You drifted your attention to the churros stand nearby, wanting a sweet treat. You didn't hear Jake's evil, spiteful intentions. The tempting, lying snake hissed:

'𝑰'𝒍𝒍 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆 𝒔𝒖𝒓𝒆 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒌 𝒚𝒐𝒖 𝒂𝒏𝒅 𝒚𝒐𝒖𝒓 𝒍𝒐𝒗𝒆𝒓'𝒔 𝒉𝒆𝒂𝒓𝒕𝒔 𝒕𝒐 𝒃𝒆𝒄𝒐𝒎𝒆 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞.'

He successfully did that with ease, which horrified you. And boy, the venom could've killed your happy marriage, almost. Luckily it was your faithful best friend that had it, or you would've been silently tortured with regret for not knowing the truth in his hell. Fucking hell, Jake, no wonder why people say you should run from a scorpio man.

But, let's forget about the shattered past, and focus on the thriving present, you and Hoon crying in each other's embrace, saying words filled with the upmost affection and actions that displayed their yearning for each other.

'Hoon...next time, please, tell me your thoughts, hm? I want to be with you, 𝒇𝒐𝒓𝒆𝒗𝒆𝒓.' You desperately plead, not wanting things to go haywire again.

'Mhmm, m'sorry...' He chokes out, clearly affected by Jake's mental abuse.

It was finally back to normal, back to a loving family. You guys could finally sleep in peace, Hoon's toned body moving so elegantly. It was so fast, making up. You even questioned if it was a silly dream. Either way, you wouldn't want to go back. And you weren't EVER going to see Jake enter your life.

'Shh,' whispers Sunghoon cutely, 'let's wake up momma.'

The two loved doing that, waking you up with kisses and cuddles, before playing with each other for a short bit of time. The weather was bright and hopeful, which gave you the impression that, after a hard-fought battle, with determination, you can succeed. What a perfect day to wake up in, you could even cry.

Jin Ae crawls to you, giggling quietly and looking at her father with such amusment. She was like a piece of him, their smooth-riding relationship so wholesome. They both lean in, count themselves to three before launching their weapons of tender kisses.

'Hehe, hello my baby!!' You sleepily smiled, before welcoming the morning with your husband,

'Hello, daddy...' You smirked, knowing damn well how it gives him a dopamine and ego boost.

'Hello my pretty, beautiful, stunning baby wife...' He complimented, laying down and hugging you and Jin Ae, each on both sides of his chest.

'Ahh, my two girls, how lucky I am to have you all.' He kissed the top of your heads, 'Mine, mine, mine, mine, 𝐦𝐢𝐧𝐞.' He said the last word like a hungry beast, but immdiately became a cute penguin, baby baekgyu. Jin Ae couldn't contol her laughter at this point, soothing sounds echoing in this haven.

'Baby,' Sunghoon started, pecking the two of you now and then, 'should we go to the park?'

Your jokes were as cringey as his, which is probably why many people were astonished by your humor.

'Which Park, your Mum, your Dad? Jay? Yeji?'

He chuckles whilst dies at your jokes,

'Babe, that was so...wow'

'You can't say much,' You said with a smug smile, 'imagine saying, "𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒐 𝒎𝒂𝒌𝒆𝒔 '𝒎𝒊𝒔𝒐' 𝒉𝒂𝒑𝒑𝒚".' You came back, knowing he will be overwhelmingly embarrased.

'BABE!! Stoppp, that was one of my worst moments in life, frick Jay.' He whined, but made sure to keep the language child-friendly, knowing Jin Ae can learn quickly.

'Haha, but yeah, we should go to the park, and let's bring Jay and Yeji!'

'Mhmm, they deserve it, AND HEESEUNG. SHOOT, I FORGOT ABOUT HIM! He was like my lifesaver.. We should probably make them gifts...' He agrees.

'I know just the thing...' You said confidently, making Sunghoon look at you, wanting for you to continue,

'FOOD!' You happily shouted, and Jin Ae copied too,

'Food!' She chortled, clapping her hands. Her and Sunghoon's cuteness broke the scales, damn...

'Heyy!! Thanks for tagging us along!' Says the three friends, excited for the payment of their therupatic actions.

'Where are we going?' Yeji asks, trying to contain the urge to just take Sunghoon's card and run off.

'Haha, we'll go to a kbbq place, Heeseung's favourite, especially.' You said, 'Oh yeah, it was Sunghoon's idea.' You grinned, because Sunghoon didn't want others to know how soft he was.

'Awww, thanks bro, come to my place anytime-' He stops, seeing your angry glare, 'OR stay with lovely Y/n right here...' He mumbles, rubbing his nape.

You guys ate like you were famished, finishing the bowl within a few minutes, but the food was definitely worth the hype.

'You know what, I feel like this is a bribe, BUT I'M ALL FOR IT.' Yeji proclaimed, earning a laugh from everyone.

'Y/niee,' starts Heeseung, doing something very unusual with his body...

'Lee Heeseung...' You said slowly with a deep tone, looking as dead as Jay is, who ends up averting his attention to Jin Ae, Yeji and Sunghoon getting stitches from laughing too hard, 'what on earth are you doing' You fake cried.

'I WAS TRYING TO DO AGEYOOOO' Wanting to be six-feet-under.

'But anyways, where we going for dessert?'

The group pondered about the various options, Jin Ae just scribbling on the piece of drawing given by the staff.

'Oh, I know, why not we go and pop over to dollywon's bakery and order from there!' You implied, knowing everyone loves going there.

'YEAH, THAT'S A GREAT IDEA! I love her bakeries' Says Yeji, scrolling on her phone to look for the menu.

'Oh yeah, Y/n, can we go to a library?' Asks Jay, 'I've been wanting to read a few poets and authors'

'Of course! Hoon, you can go to the park with Heeseung and Yeji when that happens, yeah?'

Sunghoon looks offended, 'OBVIOUSLY, I'M NOT LIKE THAT GRANDPA.'

Jay swears in korean, knowing Jin Ae isn't that knowledgeable.

'Right, let's go!!'

'Hi Reesa!!' Greets Y/n, who's happy to see her coquette friend. Y/n orders from her bakery when she's in need of something sweet, sometimes, she wants to take Reesa too.

'Hi Y/n! It's been awhile, I see we have a few costumers!' She notions to the group.

'Yep, all wanting a bite!' You chuckle, Jin Ae's motioning that she wants the chocolate muffin.

'Yup, all done! Thanks Y/n!' Says Reesa. 'Oh, and one more thing...' She takes out the chocolate muffin, 'I see mini hoon has been wanting this.' She smiles. She's so kind, no wonder why Jungwon took her as his girlfriend.

'Mmm,' hums Heeseung in delight, 'this is soooo yummy!'

The three manage to feed themselves, unlike your family. You're feeding Sunghoon like the baby he is right now, and Sunghoon's feeding the real baby. Jay takes a photo, knowing you'll want it in the picture book.

'Right,' burps Heeseung, 'let's go to the park, yeahhh?' He coos to Jin Ae.

'We'll be heading to the library, see you.'

'Y/n, what authors do you recommend? I've been quite busy lately, so I wanted to take reading just to let my imagination run wild.' Jay asks calmly, passing each shelf of books.

'I've got to say, authors like Haze, Rin, Aria, Reina, Nessa, Juila, Aeri, Rae have been taking my time, and it was worth it!' You advised, knowing how good these people are. They're like the rulers of literature, and they certaintly produce the highest-quality works.

'Ah, I have heard of them, and they're works are quite...interesting.' You realise what he meant, and squirmed in embarrassment.

'That's why there are restrictions, dummy!' You hit him, earning a sharp gasp and hiss.

'Ha, imagine if Sunghoon found out-'

'Let's just find a story to read, yeah!?' You whisper shouted, annoyed by his teasing. The Park brothers sure have something in common.

'AHH, JIN AE-AH!! GO, GO!!' cheers Heeseung.

While Jay and Y/n were purchasing books, Yeji and Jin Ae were playing tag, Jin Ae being the tagger. Sunghoon's taken many videos of the moment, wanting to keep this memory.

'We're back!!' Exclaims Y/n, hugging Sunghoon who had his arms out open for you to come.

'Haha, you missed out on some beautiful moments' chuckles Sunghoon, knowing you'll be devastated.

'What!? When..' You whine, but Sunghoon's such a romantic. He back hugs you, places his head on top of yours, intertwinned you fingers with his and says,

'Don't worry, darling. We'll make more beautiful moments, forever.'

A/n: AAAAAH, THANK YOU SO MUCH EVERYONE!! THIS MARKS MY DEBUT AS A WRITER. I HOPE YOU GUYS LIKE MY WORKS AND I'LL BE POSTING SOME MORE FICS VERY SOON. ILYSM 💗

#en-geneisaxx #enhypen #enhypen sunghoon #engene #fyp #kpop #enha #fanfic #enhypen jay #enhypen heeseung #enhypen jungwon #enhypen jake #park sunghoon ff #sunghoon x reader #sunghoon x y/n #writer #moots #enhablr #love

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iwanttobepersephone · 20 hours

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So I sent this message to @findingcrow

And I ended up explaining literally all of the emojis. Here they are (in order of explained, not order of how they were put). I spent 3 hours explaining this and it's a LONG post, so, sorry lol

👯‍♀️-The twins are just a pair of dancers, and I love the vibes of Scar and Grian dancing together in the desert

🫧-The bubbles are because their love has the same vibes as the way a child loves bubbles. The child thinks bubbles are pretty and fun, but often pops them due to a lack of understanding of their fragility

⚖️- The scale is a symbol for justice, something that Grian had the intention of bringing to the server, and yet, in the end, he hated following through with it (killing Scar)

🪬- The hand is called a hamsa, as far as I'm aware, and is a symbol for protection and guidance, something that Grian offered to Scar throughout the entire time they knew each other

✨️- The sparkles are about how attractive and nice their love seemed to Grian, how shiny the prospect of loving Scar was

💌- Well, to me, it feels like keeping his love hidden inside him, leaving only hints of its existence. You cannot read what's inside the envelope until you open it, but the heart implies it was sealed with love. He hides his feelings in the envelope like a letter never meant to be read

💃- Ok, so, the dancing one is the same as the pair dancing

🌌- The galaxy is about his home, as I like to think the Watchers live in sorta in space-ish. I think a lot about Grian routinely going up on the roof in any season of the series and just, staring at the stars. "Oh wow," he'll say, "it's so much more beautiful looking up than down"

🫀- I tend to use the real heart for situations when my love feels, well, *real*, more so than the typical cartoons heart can express. When it feels almost as if the other person is less of a loved one, more of a part of me, like we've become so very intertwined that I can never forget them. I think you can guess why that applies to Scar and Grian

🎭- The drama masks are, once again, about how he hid his feelings. "No," he said, "I'm not in love. He's just my partner in crime." It's also about how he acted out a personality that fit his needs, too. He always wanted to win, and Scar was a part of that. "I made a deal, I have to live up on it" while he's actively helping kill people, knocking down the number of who he'll have to kill once he's red. In the end, all his actions were for his own gain, but slowly the facade he put on them of being for Scar became real, the mask became his face

🕯- And the candles, well, "the light of the server." A candle in the dark. A fire, something so fierce and destructive, becoming passive and helpful. Something so necessary for some. Plus, they're often associated with magic and rituals, a tool for manifestation and summoning and communication. But a fallen candle, a flame forgotten before bed, it can become destructive again. That's what burns down houses, what takes lives. And if it doesn't lose control, it burns, and burns, and keeps burning until all of itself has melted, until it's nothing

⚔️- For the swords, I thought mostly of when Grian attacked him. Y'know, "YOU TRAITOR!". #1, I like to think of it as him putting his sword to Scars throat, so swords are obvious there. #2, he also was guarding himself! He trusted Scar, showed him parts of himself he never showed anyone else (maybe even revealed he's a watcher?????), and then Scar KILLED HIM! As part of a stupid game! (Yes I'm aware of the irony there it drives me insane I can rant about that themes about that for so so so so long and the guilt Grian feels for being the cause the games Rzaurskr74us4s4ua). So, obviously, he started to guard his heart, like swords across an entrance

⚰️- Coffin is 2 things, first, the way their love died as Scar did. I like to think that Grian tried to bury him a little, Scars final resting place was also the resting place of their love (at least, the final resting place of SCARS love). The second thing is that Scar would sell coffins, remember? But he never got one. He never got what he gave, but he did get everything Grian had

🎠- So, the horse isn't JUST a horse, it's a merry-go-round horse. Y'know, from a carousel? So, in all the seasons, their relationship kinda follows the same main story-beats, right?

•Early betrayal/beginning of a grudge

•They're forced to make up, even if just briefly

•Help each other out with something

•They fall out again

•They die (sometimes being the CAUSE of the others death, even if indirect)

It happens again and again.... like how a carousel goes around and around and around. You CHOSE to get on the carousel, Grian, and you can't get off until it's over, you know that, Grian

🏜- Anywas, for the desert, well, they're the desert duo

🦙- For the Llama, don't tell me you forgot about Pizza!

🌓- Ok the half moon, Let's see how effectively we can put this into words. So it's 2 sides of the moon, right? It's the same thing at its core, the moon, but two entirely separate appearances, light and dark. It's the same thing at its core, a game, but two entirely separate experiences, the player and the creator. 2 sides of the same coin sorta deal, yeah? They both play the game, too, and in my mind, Scar sorta creates the game, too, in his own way. Would Grian have ever stuck around the game the way he did if Scar weren't there? Scar kept things interesting for him, kept him from getting bored. Grian bent and created new rules to make sure Scar had fun, the game was created just as much for Scar as it was for Grian. And again, Grian plays too! Grian has plans blow up in his face, Grian faces punishments of breaking the rules, and despite what the other players may say, Grian lost, too. It's the same thing at its core, a game, unwinnable, but malleable

❤️‍🩹- The bandaged heart is a bit more on the nose,

I like to think both Grian and Scar were, in some way, hurt when they met. Maybe Grian had become used to the ultimately selfish love of the watchers, and had trouble believing that any other sort of love could exist. Maybe Scar hated his namesake, and wished he could hide it. (Examples, I can't quite decide on what I wanna do with it, lol. But as they grew closer, that changed. Grian began to believe in selflessness, and Scar began to find beauty in every part of him. They bandaged each others wounds and healed each others hearts

🧨- So, the dynamite is also pretty obvious, I feel like, like it's Grian. Now I COULD do some sort of deep meaning, pretty easily in fact (blowing up in the emotional way instead of the physical way, losing control of his emotions, once again circling back to "YOU TRAITOR"), but that's really not what I had in mind when I put it there

🏳️‍🌈- The queer flag.... do I need to explain that

🕰- So, the clock is a really cool one, because Grian knew from the very beginning that this would never last. Somewhere, in the back of his mind, he had a timer in the back of his mind, constantly ticking, for when it was all gonna end. It was only ever a matter of time, but he pretended it wasn't. He pretended it would last forever. Maybe, if he hoped for long enough, the clock would stop ticking, but it didn't

⏳️- Now, the sand timer has, once again, a very similar meaning. It's a timer till the end of it all, the knowledge that it will always run out, *always*. But he still joins the games, over and over again. He flips the hourglass over and restarts the timer. The sand will keep pouring, it will never change, it will end the same, always

#long post #jesssussss christ I spent 3 hours explaining my emoji choices lol #it was really fun tho #3rd life #life series #traffic light smp #traffic smp #grian #goodtimeswithscar #watcher grian #grian watcher #symbolism #this is just straight up copy and pasted from our dms so if it feels a bit weird thats probably why

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pocket-size-cthulhu · 8 months

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Shocking: it turns out that being So Extra Helpful To Everyone does NOT actually make you feel less like people only care about you for your utility

#it's just been one of those weeks #where it feels like everyone wants something from me #I'm tired #I'm forgetting that people like me as a person lol #🤪#silly goofy things #I'll be ok but like #it sucks that i have to do things to remind myself of that??

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campingwiththecharmings · 6 months

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does anyone else make more out of their relationships than they actually are or is that just me?

#like #i am very emotionally repressed and have hella trust issues #so it's really hard for me to get close to people and/or let THEM get close #so when i tell people things about myself that most people have no problem sharing #(like my fucking name for instance a;lkds;lf lmao or where i live or what i do for a living etc)#to me that's a huge step. to me that's opening up.#but i always forget that to THEM it isn't #so i put way more stock into things than i should #i build up our relationship in my head more than i should #because i really do FEEL so much but it's so hard for me to show it #so sharing pieces of myself is kind of my way of showing the love i have for people #or doing things for them #acts of service and all that #so i always feel closer to people than i'm sure they do to me #and sometimes i forget that we're not as close as i feel we are #and i put unrealistic expectations on people #and then i get reminded that hey it's just me that feels this way and it just...idk it sucks #and it's through no fault of the other person. really. it's all me and my plethora of fucking issues lol #i just wish i knew how to NOT be like this. to just be fucking normal and not be so closed off.#so afraid of human connection but also at the same time DESPERATE for it #for someone to just SEE me and want to put in the effort it's inevitably gonna take to REALLY get to know me #to show me that i'm as worthy of that effort as i know i should feel #ugh idk why i'm posting this here just in my feels i guess #ignore me

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melverie · 8 days

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Aaaaaaahhhhhhhh today I've been constantly experiencing the urge to un-private today-in-the-devildom & start writing for it again

#i'm gonna ramble in the tags but #i've been talking with starr (if you're reading this--hi starr!! <3) about the blog today and sharing some of the entries #and it just made me miss it so much #+ the conversation actually made me realize some other reasons why i didn't enjoy the blog in general anymore #like i genuinely love the blog and i genuinely loved writing for it & that conversation reminded me of that #but also there were so many reasons that ultimately pushed me to more or less abandon the blog & then later private it too #so i'm kind of at a loss here #tbh i think i'm mostly just scared to pick the blog up again only for it to end exactly like last time i picked it back up #i've actually always wanted for the blog to be a source of inspiration y'know?#like the things mentioned in the entries are kinda just small ideas right #i was hoping that people would read these & feel inspired to write or draw something of their own based on my entries #that was actually what made me start the blog in the first place. the hope that i could inspire others that way #aaahhhhhh.... maybe it's on me since i could have more openly communicated that idea......#i did get to meet one wonderful person who wrote a few fics based on my entries tho!! (hi ali <3)#but yeah..there's that #also the way engagement just dropped significantly after a while #like i know i was gone for a good while & that a lot of people left the fandom and all that #but still getting maybe one reblog if i'm lucky really feels like a punch to the gut #ESPECIALLY considering that i was close to 900 followers on there #do you guys know that feeling when you proudly show someone you care about something you did only to get a disinterested answer?#yeah...#that's essentially how it feels like to me #and well as you might know the feeling of “why should i keep writing if apparently no one cares” eventually won... haha.....#but aaaahhhhh i'm still clinging onto the hope & what ifs here #that conversation with starr really just made me forget about everything that frustrated me about the blog & left me with this #longing feeling to start again lol #hey if you've made it this far into the tags let me just ask--would you care if i picked the blog back up?#would you also *show* that you care?#i'm actually quite curious (you could almost call me george lol)#anyway maybe we'll see each other on today-in-the-devildom again in the future.. who knows

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mel-loly · 1 year

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-“Just a flower, in the middle of the field at night, a light is turned on and reveals.. A day arriving with confident hope and silent happiness!”🌹🐝

#for those who didn't get it.. today is my birthday! and so tomorrow is really the day of the party and etc..#that's why I put “arriving” because tomorrow is a really special and very important event in my life akzbskhzjsb #and yes. I'm cosplaying as princess bela. she's one of my favorite characters and her dress.. It's literally a dream come true for me!#because I'm really going to use one similar to this one tomorrow irl and-#I won't tell you guys more details because it's personal things but- well. that's a little explain of what the art is about!#I really feel very happy.. and I admit. I don't even know how to explain my happiness but.. well...#I feel special. surrounded by people who *really* love me and show true affection for me and..#that I just have to thank. for everything. I have gratitude for all of you! like- thank you very much. really. for everything..#I can't even express in words how grateful I am for each of you #know that I love and appreciate everyone who is still with me on this journey called life!#and of course- I couldn't forget to talk about him lol. thanks to mike!#I don't know what would have become of me if I hadn't met someone as friendly and good-hearted as him #he was always by my side and made me feel more special in every day. in a unique way and one of the most important to me..#I love him very much/p. and I hope that our friendship will be forever happy and respectful the way it already is!#(of course. this also works for the other friends I made here too- please don't get mad or jealous! I love you all. okay??)#and well.. that's it.#I hope I still stay here. that I enjoy my day and face any fear or harm that I might have ahead of me and..#that I just hope for the best. I put everything in God's hands and I feel confident that things will work out no matter what the cost!#thank you guys again for everything and happy birthday to me lol-💛#happy birthday to me #it's my birthday #mel creator #mel loly #cosplaying of beauty and the beast #i'm mel and this is my blog✌️#my art blog #art mel #art #my art #my oc character

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icewindandboringhorror · 1 year

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Recent sky photos

#still... I am not joking.. every time I post things like this it is so hard to narrow them down #I am almost as obsessed with the sky as I am with cats. I have a folder of just cloud pictures with like 650 photos in it right now #I don't post them all because I think it'd seem repetitive probably but just know... lol #that could be an entire blog or something.. hundreds and hundreds...#Like the same way that I cannot explain my obsession with cats or why they've imprinted into my brain so heavily - clouds are the same way #anyway.. .still have the costume photos and stuff like that I just havent edited and posted yet lol.. I will.. hoepfully have actual art #content and stuff thats not just random cat photos sometime soon. I'm just always so preoccupied at the beginning of the year with trying to #adjust to new goals and schedules.. plus.. still wokriong on that wretched little slideshow aaaaaaaaaaaa... it is going to take me...#a million yearbs.....#I just want the worldbuiling lore established so I can branch out and do other things.. aughhhh......#also have to work on game videos and a few other vidoes.. still trying to keep up wiht the youtube a little.. I just havent been productive #like since new years as I've felt sicker with my stomach symptoms and stuff.. ToT ALSO I DID MAKE THAT ENTIRE interactive fiction game which #I still have no posted anywhere lol.. Because it was kind of to accompany something that I was doing on a game site (like imagine making a g #ame to go along with one of your neopets or something) but it works totally fine as a standalone thing as well like. so detached from the #lore of the game site in general that it'd be broadly understandable and is it's own thing of course (because I dont really like writing #other people's characters/in the confine's of other worlds so I made everything original as possible with just a loose tie in to the neopets #typw thing lol) - but I figured since it works on it's own I could post it publicly other places too like 'hey look I made something' since #that is...... kind of somehting that counts as like... being creatively productive lol? like I keep talking about getting nothing done while #also forgetting about the things I actually HAVE done. alas I continuously forget. Seriously I am so bad at social media. I am never exagger #ating for comedic effect or something. I am the type of person that could legit like. write and produce and direct and complete a movie #that will be million dollars shown in theaters or something and I would forget to mention it anywherte until like 5 months later and go 'oh #uh .. oh yeah.. i should post about that online somehwere probably.. oops' . Cursed with the 'forget about everything once it's complete'#trait. Like the way my brain works is just like. once I finish something I'm immediately like 'cool! onto the next thing!!' without processi #ng what i just did. I'm just always looking forward to the next thing. I'll finish sculptures and then throw them away or forget about them.#I take photos and they sit in the drafts for 6 months before I post them. Like to me the enjoyment comes from the PROCESS of making somehtin #g but I don't care as much about the end result so it just doesnt exist in my brain anymore once I'm done? idk.. anyway ghjbhj #SORRY.. trying to be more active. I want to make and sell sculptures again. sell all of my spare clothes too. stuff. things.. aaa.. ***

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anothermonikan · 4 months

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me when my asexuality means I'm asexual and do not find people sexually attractive

#Okay I'm being really overdramatic with the Walter White gif lmao #this is about an exchange I had with a friend today where they sent me a video of an actor and said 'smash or pass'#And they do that all the time but it's usually with like anime characters or puters (They know I'm a computer-liker)#and gwah...my immediate reaction was like 'That's a real person. That's a weird thing to do smash or pass to.'#'You shouldn't be finding a random real person sexually attractive at all. that's objectifying behavior!'#and then I have remind myself that no Andy that's completely normal behavior. That's how people usually are. Do not forget you're the weird #gwahhhh. Me when my brain is da way it is #You know sometimes I forget I'm Ace and then something like this happens and I'm like oh yeah!#I forgot this was a fundamental part of who I am! Oops! It's kinda reassuring but also gwahhh #Okay I think the tags are long enough that it's safe to say here but like #Thought I unlearned the 'Just because you have a libido it doesn't cancel out your asexuality' thing #but man...it still be like that sometimes #Okay I gotta go to bed and other stuff now lol #Android.txt

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dr111ft · 5 months

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Me: Idk if my storyline's ready yet what if people notice that I haven't calculated the post-apocalyptic economic factors that would affect what kind of blaster rael uses. What if the sheets on kaspar's bed don't line up with their family history. I'll be hanged.

Average published comic book: Yeah theyre chasing Killer Moth in the Mothmobile. Yeah idk the car is shaped like a moth btw it's $5 if you want the print version of this. And we forgot what eye color the mc has hope that's cool

#maturing is realizing the popularity of art is based on capital not skill #ik this is basic info but it's something you have to unlearn as an artist on the internet #bc there's this idea that if you're Good Enough and Cool Enough all of the algorithms will like you and you'll just Get Popular #it's all luck and marketing ability #I'm sure if I drew fanart for whatever anime is popular rn I'd get hundreds of notes a day but I'm just. not gonna do that #it's confidence based I think I just gotta act like I know what tf I'm doing and people will buy it #lol #txt #I've been talking a lot lately hope you guys don't mind #posting consistently helps me be relevant? Ig? Ik personally I forget accounts exist if theyre not on my dash 24/7 lmao

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rollercoasterwords · 2 years

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feel like i shouldn't have to say this but if ur gonna copy and paste quotes from my fanfic as ur tiktok content the very least u could do is give me credit for my own writing 😐

#i have. a lot more thoughts about this #but it's my bedtime now so i'm just gonna get some frustration out and go to sleep #honestly i think a lot of the ways people on tiktok use ff as content is kinda....iffy #but this just seems blatantly wrong to me #especially if ur video is getting thousands of views??#like....glad everyone thinks u wrote my thing lol #also. the fic in question is not something that i would ever want to go viral #so i'm not even sure how i feel about someone posting abt it on tiktok in the first place #can't even message the person bc i am locked out of the rcw tiktok after forgetting my password lmao #so if u are a person who does this hi!!! please stop!!

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popsicle-stick · 1 year

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people who give jonathan harker a devon accent in dracula. i owe you my life

#'people' being one person who posted readings of his first few entries here #it bugs me that he's always given 'standard home counties RP' accent. it bugs me a lot. he wouldnt fucking say (speak like) that #for me he has an accent that‚ upon entering the professional world‚ he supresses somewhat but it's still there #regionalism in dracula is. interestingly. depicted and it's so striking how jonathan's is a neutral 'accentless' narration #in contrast to the way jonathan/stoker depicts essentially everyone else as rustic yokels #but he probably DOES have at least the vestiges of an accent constantly stereotyped as yokelish. it's the butt of the joke today still!!#some of it feels....like he's distancing? i doubt stoker actually went that deeper than 'funney accent hee hee' when he was writing but idc #and god the sheer gulf between him/mina and the others....made so obvious when they speak. he'd definitely supress it further #the latter half of the book & the interactions between the main characters are fascinating from a class perspective #i'd say this goes for mina too but i'm unsure if she is actually from exeter or not (i imagine she's at least fairly local to there)#i could go on and on about accent and class in dracula and what exactly stoker is saying with those accents #anyway these tags are a mess im just gonna post and forget about it lol #jonathan harker #there's also a wealth to be said about quincey and vh but that's another essay. lmao

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sensazioneultra · 6 months

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that post got me thinking of how much my mental illness fucked with my memory and i got so... sad? that's not the right word. scared. but also it's something akin to grief. and something that effects my actual grief over people i lost. it affects everything. but i have never really talked about it with anyone. like not a single person, therapist, friend, no one. it's not even like a conscious choice, i just... think i am ashamed of it to the point i don't even think about it i just kinda live with ghosts in the back of my mind that grow in number the more i experience things and moments and feelings. i joke about my bad memory all the time! except it's not a joke, but if i stop to truly think about it i feel so much pain it gets overwhelming. like rn. idk if any of this makes sense but it's just... like tbh i wouldn't even know how to explain this to anyone! how do i explain something that i don't even understand myself. things just disappear. i went to a concert and i know it was fun but i can't remember much. if anything at all. i loved this person and i probably still love them but i couldn't tell you what we ever did together. i studied ancient greek for years but i remember next to nothing of what i learned and sometimes i pretend to remember something but in reality i looked it up. people around me much older than me remember in details a trip from 40 years ago but i already forgot so much of the trip i went on a little more than a month ago. it's like my life is endless grieving. idk how anyone who doesn't experience something like this could ever understand

#just like i don't understand the rest of people who don't live like i do!#it's not a fault. i'm so glad most people can't understand even while it makes me feel a burning envy. it's contradictory but both feelings #are true i swear #anyway. i can't even think about my grandma most of the time bc the fact i remember so so so little #while i KNOW she was important to me more than i can ever understand..... is just too much it makes me feel like #like idk like the worst person in thw world #ik. ik it's not my fault and i don't forget things on purpose. ik #but rationally knowing that unfortunately doesn't erase the constant feeling of being BAD. WRONG. EVIL #i can't even remember my grandma's smile. i can't remember anything she ever said to me. not one word. everything is so vague and blurry #how can i claim to love her. how can i claim to have known her for 14 years. how can i claim that she was one of the most important people #in my whole life #ah. have dinner soon and i'm trying so hard not to cry bc if i start i won't stop anytime soon and my family can't see me cry lol #i was tagging this as delete later but actually no #just not tagging this but it's staying

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