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greyskyflowers · 4 months

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More Visored/Ichigo ramblings because I just love them so much.

Is it trauma, power dynamics, or hollow instincts? The world may never know.

Jk ~ If I'm writing it then it's all three.

⚠️ Visored/Ichigo because that's my jam and I'm partying alone ⚠️

💀💀💀💀

It starts as a joke, mixed in with the stupid shit they send each other. Sending Ichigo messages like remember to eat, moron. Or stg you better get a full 8 hours of sleep tonight or I'll kick your ass.

But Ichigo does a lot better when they remind him to actually take care of himself. As much as he takes care of others, he's terrible at taking care of himself.

They make him eat when he's with them. He'll eat about half before being distracted or say he's full and try to pass it to one of them. They shove it back at him and tell him to eat, not taking their eyes completely off him until he finishes everything. He never gets sick or uncomfortable, so they're not forcing him to overeat. They think he doesn't remember what it's like to feel comfortably full, usually eating just enough that the hunger doesn't hurt.

There's a gnawing hunger that comes with their hollows sometimes, a hunger for things that Ichigo isn't ready for yet. It's not real hunger in the way humans get hungry, but it does make eating hard sometimes.

Ichigo sends them pictures of what he's eating when he's not with them, sometimes making sure to include his unimpressed face, and something about not needing to be reminded about eating like a child.

They disagree.

They also text him to remind him to actually sleep, frowning when they get responses about hollows or doing homework. The low smoldering anger for Shinigami that constantly lives in them now burns a little hotter each time Ichigo shows up with new injuries and bruises under his eyes or when their texts show read at 3am. Especially when they know that there's shinigami assigned to the town who don't seem to do anything.

They get creative. They train him until he's so exhausted he falls asleep after cleaning up, slumped against their shoulders or curled up in their bed. Convincing him to use their bed took awhile, but his hollow desperately wanted a pack and Ichigo didn't fight it too hard. They like that he'll smell like them, even though it's a warning that no one but hollows will be able to sense.

Bed may not be the word to use when it's big enough to fit all of them comfortably and has more pillow and blankets than they can even count anymore.

They all sleep together, something that started from a combination of their hollows prefering it and safety in numbers. Ichigo naps in sheets that smell like them and leaves his own scent behind every time he drags his skin across the sheets. It should be upsetting, the scent of someone who isn't them in their space but it isn't, in fact it's comforting. Especially when he doesn't stay with them. They know Ichigo isn't there with them, which their hollows huff unhappily about, but it smells like he is and it's just enough to settle their instincts.

Ichigo always ends up finding the nearest person when he's asleep. If anyone gets in the bed to rest while he's in there, he always finds his way to their side and presses in as close as he can. It's a big bed, it has to be to comfortably fit all of them even though they usually end up piled on top of each other and tangled up.

If he falls asleep sitting next to someone, his head will find their shoulder or he'll slump down until his head is on their lap. He sleeps better with skin contact, the ever present frown on his face fading when he's made skin contact.

He's bad about letting them know if he's hurt, his mindset seems to be if he can still move, or as long as he's not actively bleeding, then he's fine. Bruises are the worst, big ugly ones that they won't know about unless Ichigo wears something that shows it, it gets exposed during a spar, or he moves stiffly and can't hold back a wince.

That also means he has the bruises they give him from sparring longer, and they never claimed to be good and proper okay? Ichigo wearing marks they gave him is appealing. They'd rather give him other marks to warn people off, and they want to say that they didn't know they'd end up wanting this but Ichigo was always going to be theirs.

Someday they'll be able to make sure he's constantly covered in their scent and they can bite and suck all the marks they want onto his skin. They'll be able to keep him in their bed every night and smell him when they first wake up. They'll be able to check him for wounds or bruises he thinks aren't bad enough to mention and remind him that just because he can tolerate the pain doesn't mean he should have to.

He starts to keep some spare clothes with them but they take every excuse they can to have him wear something of theirs. On one memorable occasion he even wore a pair of Lisa's leggings, blushing and mumbling that he was cold and they felt soft. Lisa rushed to tell him he could wear them whenever he wanted, eyes flicking down to where the dark material clung to his legs. It's a soft, thin material and borderline see through in some spots where the material stretched over muscle, like his hips and thighs.

At some point Ichigo seems to catch on, and they're all able to stop pretending they're just interested in friendship.

Ichigo does his own clumsy scenting, not quite right but it's clear what he's trying to do and they don't correct him. The furrow of his brow says he's going to figure it out eventually.

He rubs their cheeks together when he's tired or hurt, or when he knows they're upset or hurt, not quite scenting but it's adorable, and his hollow is trying very hard to figure out what feels right.

He doesn't hesitate to nudge food over to them if he thinks they aren't eating enough. If they get distracted training or doing something else, he brings them food and hovers until he's able to make them sit down and eat.

They can't resist holding out bites to him occasionally and grinning at the faint blush before he takes it.

He spends a lot more time in their bed. And the kid is a fucking tease once he gets going because the amount of reasons he find to strip before rubbing his scent all over their bed is unreal. So much bare skin means his scent sinks into everything and stays, everytime they roll over or land on the mattress a burst of Ichgo greets them.

Knowing he's barely clothed, or wearing theirs, and vulnerable in their bed is incredibly distracting. He's sleep warm skin and pliant limbs, little protesting noises leaving him when they pile around or on him.

Hiyori is the first one to leave a mark, the urge to bitebitebite becoming overwhelming and she's behind Ichigo, wrapping her arms around him to keep him still and biting down on the curve of his shoulder and neck. He doesn't react, just keeps talking like he doesn't have someone clinging to his back and chewing a dark bruise onto his shoulder.

It's fair game after that and he's always got marks on his throat and shoulders, the delicate inside of his wrists and inner thighs, and the soft skin of hips and lower belly.

He leaves his own marks on them, not near as dark or deep as theirs, and it fades quicker. He bites at them with dull human teeth instead of the sharp hollow teeth he needs to make a lasting mark, another thing he's still getting the hang of.

💀💀💀💀

Do I like to think that they would all text each memes and stupid shit? Yes.

Didn't get Kisuke added in this one but I like to think he's always involved too ~

#bleach #ichigo kurosaki #visoreds #ichigo x visored #ichigo x everybody tbh #hollow instinct au??#if i bite it its mine #reaping souls with greyskyflowers #going to drag all of you into poly andor qp visored hell with me #visored

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kizuryuu-04 · 11 months

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A Mercenary's Murmur/傭兵の独り言

A Mercenary's Murmur | SHIRONE #pixiv https://www.pixiv.net/novel/show.php?id=17384768 From pixiv, a small story in my own handwriting, which I poked Deepl to translate in a messy way. There may be mistranslations and such, but I am very, very bad at English…sorry if I didn't correct it fully. I wanted the three of them to get along.

Hank and his best friend duo. I just recently got to know Hank through fnf. I'm a newcomer to Madness Combat, but as I watched the movie and did some research, I couldn't stop my creative juices from flowing…. I'm not sure if I've fully grasped the characters and settings yet, but I hope you'll warm to it. I hope you will warmly watch it. Hank is so cute when he is excited by the blender.

'Listen, Hank. I was working with Sanford the other day, ……'

'That's the kind of Deimos that made a hell of a mess up there ……'

Hank follows the words of the exchange between himself and the other side of the room with just his eyes.

Deimos and Sanford are best friends, and the fact that they are together is obvious even to Hank, who has little interest in anything other than living and fighting.

But why is he there, and why is he sitting between them, side by side on the sofa?

I was brought into Sanford's room in their mood, after we happened to work together in a conflict of interest on a job.

As for Hank, he wanted to quickly go back to his room and go to bed, but Deimos offered to buy him a hot dog, and he decided to nod silently half an hour ago, especially since he had nothing better to do than eat and sleep.

The two of them took me on the road to buy a large size hot dog, then we arrived at Sanford's room, where we are now.

'It would have been a lot easier if you hadn't tried to be so weirdly cool over there, hey Deimos?'

'No shit! Even Sanford fell down on his ass in the most impossible place.'

The first thing that comes to mind is the fact that the two of them have been in the same room together for a long time, and they are now in the same room together.

'I wish Hank could have seen it when Sanford took a big tumble in the middle of nowhere.'

'That's because he stepped on a shell casing you wasted and scattered all over the place, you stupid Deimos!'

The two men are arguing, nibbling on a half-eaten hotdog between them.

Although he usually acts alone and therefore doesn't crowd, he is still not uncomfortable in the company of the two men.

For Hank, the basic classification of others was 'enemy or killable', and the two were non-enemies who would not do harm to him.

However, he felt that they belonged in a special position within the non-enemy category.

They are not enemies, and it is not unpleasant to be fussed over or shouldered right next to them, as they are now, something.

'Do you want another Coke?'

'…… Yes.'

Sanford pours me a Coke in my empty cup.

Sanford is serious despite his power-type fighting style and appearance, and he often takes it upon himself to take care of Deimos and me in any way he can.

'Sanford, me too.'

Deimos, on the other hand, is a bit lax and somewhat bossy, and Hank thinks he is the most well-spoken and articulate of the three present.

I don't know why they keep bothering with him, who is not very talkative or friendly.

Hank stopped thinking about it after three seconds, thinking it was okay since they weren't going to do him any harm.

He is not good at thinking and exploring, and he hates small talk.

So (Oh well), Hank throws the thought out in seconds.

When I threw it out, I dredged up recent memories of Deimos once telling me, "You're stupid, but you're not dumb, so you're a waste," and Sanford once telling me, "You're tactful, but…".8

'Come to think of it, I had bought about three ice creams.'

'Seriously, that guy's hot.'

Before I knew it, Deimos and Sanford had finished their fight and started to calculate how much ice cream they were going to eat.

'You're going to eat it too, aren't you?'

Deimos asks Hank, as if the ice cream was his, even though it was Sanford's.

I replied with a short 'yes' and Deimos handed me an ice-cream and a spoon, saying 'good to be honest'.

'I knew I'd have ice cream for dessert after dinner! '

You think so too, don't you? Deimos pressed him, and Hank nodded after a short pause, and Deimos said, "Right!" and puts the ice cream in his mouth in a good mood.

'If you think there's something better, you don't have to agree otherwise.'

Deimos seems to have forced a nod, and Sanford follows up.

Hank pauses for a moment in his follow-up, then replies, "I don't mind after-dinner ice cream either."

'I hope so.'

Deimos poked at the relieved Sanford for caring too much, and then the fight started again, this time with Hank in the middle.

(…… I wonder if they call this kind of thing 'buddies'.)

While eating ice cream with the two bickering behind him, Hank tried to apply the word that suddenly came to mind to himself.

The feeling of fitting in felt a little ticklish and somewhat strange.

(Not so bad, I think.)

With a somewhat furtive sensation, Hank opened his bandana-covered mouth to stop the two from fighting.

#madness combat #hank j wimbleton

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poprock-the-baker · 3 years

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Daddy's Work Trip

(My First Ever TF Story I Made, Enjoy!)

-[The Past Week]-

My dad had been ordered on a business trip, he was to be going off across the states for a good solid week. Now normally that wouldn't be a problem at all, normally I say. But he just so happened to ground me earlier this week had taken all my electronics other than my phone. So before he leaves on his trip I need to find them so he can't hide them before I can get them safe. Today I just so happen to have the chance to go and search.

-[Present Day]-

"Now don't you think about finding your stuff James. I will return it all to you and get you something else if you don't try to pull one over on me. I need to go get another suitcase at the store before my flight. So I will see you when I get home to say goodbye before my flight out." My dad said before he kissed my forehead and turned to the door. "Don't be mad. You were the one who decided to break coffee pots with your fucking stupid soft drinks. See you soon Jamey." He reached for the door and proceeded to walk out and headed to the store.

About ten minutes when by and I felt it was a good amount of time by then. "Ok so he should be gone for now. Now let's check around his took for my laptop. He will just easily think he misplaced it when he gets home. So lets check his suitcase first. He might take it with him on his trip to keep it out of my reach the entire time." Proceeding to his room I looked around for his casually vibrant pink suitcase. You could guess he was either a very feminine man, or he was gay. Him being the latter. He came out to me about 8 years ago when I was 11. So I have known his sexuality for a while, doesn't bother me though. I pull his suitcase onto his bed and zipped it open. "Ok dad. Lets see what you are taking on your trip." Looking inside I couldn't really see anything other than his clothes. "Please don't tell me I betrayed his trust for nothing." As I say that I move the clothes over and see my computer. "I KNEW HE WAS GOING TO TAKE IT WITH HIM! Well, don't mind me while I just take my property." I reach inside and go to grab my computer. As I do I brush my hand against something sharp and get pricked a little deeply. "Well shit! That hurts. But it isn't like i got blood on anything. He won't be able to know. I just-" I start to feel lightheaded. "I just need to… To… To rest…" My body gets extremely heavy and starts to burn and soon they all end and I pass out.

-[2 hours later]-

"H-Huh… What happened?" I try to go rub my eyes as I opened them but I realized I couldn't move my arms, and not just that. I soon realized my entire body was paralyzed. As I started to panic I could hear a car pull up. "Shit! What do I do?! I guess I just need to tell him I'm sorry and get his help." I waited in my dad's room for about ten minutes before I started to worry. But they are soon brushed over as my dad stepped into his room. "Oh thank god. Dad! Something happened! I can't see to move, can you call the hospital?" Nothing. "Dad? Why aren't you answering me?" No answer. "Dad?" I don't understand whats going on. Not until he gets closer to the bed, and he keeps getting larger. "Where did that damn boy go, cause it looks like he tried to get his computer Cyrus.." He wasn't talking to me, but he turned and I saw her had his ear piece in and was on the phone. "Yeah I know I was just a bit hard. But he can't just decide he has the right to break everything and leave it for me to pay for." Is he still upset? Why can't he notice me! "Do I see the piece you sent for me to buy? Yeah I'm looking right at it babe. Are you sure its ok to if I wear it? It looks very beautiful and I don't want it to get saliva on it. And before you say it, yes I know a tongue piercing is supposed to get saliva on it but you know I collect some and just dont wear them." As he spoke I got worried. He was speaking of a gift he bought as he looked at me. What is going on. "Ok fine I'll wear it babe. Thanks for getting me the piercings babe. I love you." He hangs up the phone and then gets on his knees and looks at me. "You are one lucky piece of jewelry little guy. I'm positive James would have stolen you if he found you. But now you get to come along with me for my trip. And get to see the inside of my mouth as well!" "Dad? What are you doing. What do you mean jewelry! It's me! James! Why can't you see me! I'm your son not jewelry." I said to him. But nothing seemed to register for him. It was like… I wasn't me. And soon I realized what was happening. Jewelry? Tongue piercing? Not noticing me? I couldn't believe it and didn't want to. But soon my dad grabbed me and took me into his mouth, and having taken out his old piercing, he put me in. I started to panic and soon, even though I seemingly had no brain anymore, my anxiety kicked in and, having an anxiety attack, I passed out. Days passed without me waking. By that time my dad was already out of our state.

-[3 Days Later]-

I hadn't figured out where James went before I left for my trip and I hadn't gotten a call or message from him either. I was now in Portland, Oregon. My business meeting was taking place later today but I was currently eating at a cafe and waiting for my boyfriend to meet me here. I finally see him and wave him in. "Hey Cyrus! I'm glad to see you again." I got in and take a hug before I kiss him and slip my tongue inside his mouth and letting our tongues play for a second before I go back and sit down and drink my coffee.

I wake up to a harsh and assaulting situation. I was in a dark place and there was no light coming in at all. It felt really damp and humid. And something kept on hitting me under and over me. Soon, I figure out where I was. My father still hasn't noticed I was his tongue piercing. What just happened was that I had taken a part in my dad's makeup session. I feel like it can only get worse from here.

Cyrus comes and sits next to me and I kiss his cheek softly. "So you are gonna meet me again tomorrow after my business duty is over right? Its gonna be the last day I'm here so I thought we could enjoy our special time together doing some special things. What do you think?" He seems to be thinking it over and I soon know he is just playing with me. "Of course babe! I got a new place as well and we can bust it in when you stay before your flight home." I lean in for another kiss and decide to whisper in his ear. "how about we feel you up and suck your off big boy? Let's let this new piercing get broken in as well, not just the bed~" I bite his ear playfully before he speaks. "I actually have a gift for you to have once we get to my place. So just you wait and you'll be having tons of fun! I got to jet now though. See you at my place tomorrow?" I accept and wave him off before finishing my coffee and heading to my business conference.

Over the course of the next hours I am assaulted his hot beverages that burn my skin, cold water that chills by metal bones, gritty food that hits my head, and so much more. I am just excited for this trip to be over. Hopefully my dad will find a way to get me back to normal. Surely he can figure out I'm in his mouth. The final test approached as he drove into a driveway though. His boyfriend greets him and he locks the car and proceeds inside.

Enjoy in the drive I finally get the embrace of my boyfriend and we head inside. "So what is this gift you have for me babe? I already have this piercing." He looks over at the table and I soon proceed to as well. It is another tongue piercing. But it is a special one. The exact one I lost the first tike I met him. "Took me a while but I figure out where it was. Someone turned it in a bit ago after finding out it wasn't worth much of anything. I cleaned and disinfected it for you. So now that old one you are wearing now can just be tossed out. Cause this one is more important than any." For a second his smile seemed to be hiding something sinister it seemed but I brushed it off. "Babe… I'll put it in right now!" "NO DON'T! I meannn… Um lets still break that one in while you can. I'm sure you won't take this one out for a while. So lets start getting dirty. Starting with this." He soon proceeds to undress, my predator instincts kick in and I tackle him and start our session of intercourse.

I didn't like any of this. Was I going to be thrown away? Disposed cause of a new old sentimental relic? But most importantly, what is cyrus doing. I don't have a lot of time to think before my father starts to tongue at Cryus' asshole getting in and feeling all around. I can still somehow smell and I can only describe it as revolting. The smell was so bad and the experience only got worse. "Get ready big boy, someone is gonna get some rod suction." Then my dad proceeded to give Cyrus a lot and agonizing blowjob that lasted for longer than thirty minutes. It was so painful. His hot and throbbing shaft kept rubbing into my bulbs as he kept on pumping my dad's face over and over again until finally. *Release* "Be a good boy. Take all of daddy's seed. Swallow it all. Not one drop left." My dad did just that. He swallowed every single bit of Cyrus' semen. Afterwards they cooled down but stay naked. "You wanna try the old piercing on babe? See if it fits?" "I'd love to. You want to hold this one?" "Dad. Dad no. Dad don't take me out! No please don't! Dad!" The plees go unheard as I'm undone and placed into Cyrus' hand. "You mind if I wear it from now on? My old one just broke and I could use a good and new one. I would really like it if I could use this one." Say no. Please dad say- "Sure! As long as you take good care of it I don't mind. Its not like I'll need it back anything soon. So just have it." No… Please… "Good! I'll put it in right now!" Cyrus takes me undone into his mouth and secures me into his tongue as he sticks it out. "Like it? It feels so good." "You know I do. If James was here he would have a hoot. He is in love with piercings and he would want that one so badly." "Don't worry Malcom I'm sure he knows it very well. Don't worry." The smile I see him produce chills my very core. "Hahaha. Yeah he probably already has it. Well I'll be heading to the airport. I'll text you when I'm home. You get some sleep ok?" "I will. I'll enjoy this gift from you. Something tells me it will be just perfect. And I have a feeling it won't ever break." What…

After exchanging the piercings I kiss Cyrus goodbye and head to my car and start driving away. Still nothing from James. I'll have a talk with him when I get home. Until then its me time.

I see my dad's car leave from the view of cyrus' mouth. His next words chill me even more. "Your dad sure is hot isn't he right?" Did he just talk to me? "If you are wondering, yes. I was the one who did this to you. I'm what they call, a channelist. I have the ability to change anyone I seem unworthy into objects for as long as I need. Now you have a choice. Well two." I don't pay attention to him as I'm processing all that has just been said. If I cry I would. But I can't seem to feel anything other than Chris' hot and humid breath passing by me. "I can tell you aren't listening. I give up on trying to help you. I will make you become so close that you wont ever be able to get away from your father." He proceeded to call and ask my dad back over so he can give him one final gift and do it one more time. The answer my dad gives us clear. "Yes."

I had dumbly forgotten my flight was tomorrow and was about to just wait the night out alone when Cyrus called. He invited me back and I immediately accepted. I rushed back to his house and opened the door. I saw him sitting in a spinning chair as he spun to face me and I saw him holding a small crystal human figure. "What's that babe?" "I thought we could have a final go at our experiment from long ago. Remember your cock vore days? Well I had been saving this little guy for such a day. So what would you think about sending this little dude down yous shaft to be trapped inside your sentence tank forever?" "Oh hell yes."

The motions were going so fast. I couldn't believe what was happening. My dad walked into the room and the conversation was going good until they noticed me. Then cyrus said they should put me inside his cock. The closer my dad got the more terrified I became. Slowly he undid his belt them his shorts and finally lost the underwear. He went and grabbed me and held me in front of his face. "I feel bad for you little guy. Only now getting to see a real man. But don't worry, I'll keep you with me all the time till I die. You'll be a good company for my semen. Just you wait. I cant wait for this pleasure to come, so I am gladly going to enjoy using you." His words didn't show a sign of concern. Cyrus was giggling as he later back and watched. My dad stuck me in his mouth and slowly coated me in saliva before spitting me out and grasping his erect and lethally large cock. "Down the hatch fucker." He showed no sign of compassion. He was a harsh and cruel ruler as he lowered me into his slit and I cried out to no avail. He slowly worked me down as he kept me traveling closer and closer to the end before. *plop* I fall into his sentence chamber and I hear his moans loudly. "Best gift ever babe."

Cyrus never told my dad about me. And after he got home he never found me. I was declared missing and search parties started and ended. Days turned to weeks which turned to months then years. My dad and Cyrus got married and all the time I never despise inside his semen, I was there since that day and I was part of everything. From the beginning I never should have been ungrateful. Cause I would still be a son instead of a cock toy. But there isn't a way to save myself now. This is my life now. As my dad's work trip toy.

-[END]-

🍞🥐🥖🍞🥐🥖🍞🥐🥖🍞🥐🥖🍞🥐🥖🍞🥐🥖🍞

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onepiece-sidepiece · 2 years

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this is true of all fandoms, and it's nothing new, but i wanna bitch for a second

(I deserve it after working sick af for 14 hours straight)

going to any One Piece tag is so annoying bc of how broad the spectrum of the posts are

on one post you'll find some cool fan art, the next will be a takedown of a character, the next will be non-tagged spoilers, the next will be some joke, the next will be a detailed conspiracy theory explaining how Point A connects to Point 74...etc

and there's no real way to sift through the bullshit you want to avoid in order to find the nuggets of gold that you want

for example

regarding One Piece, all I wanna do is fuck around. i wanna make fun of characters and their stupidity. I want to point out absolute insane things

like how pencils don't really exist in that entire fucking world, just goddamn quill pens (there were some on Nami's drafting desk at Arlong's, but that's the literal only time I've seen anything pencil-related)

or like how we've never seen a fucking motorized Model T-esque automobile, despite submarines having the capabilities to serve as hospitals and operating rooms, and Franky putting together the Black Rhino FR-U 4 and the Brachio Tank 5. but vehicles? with wheels? that transport people and goods from one place to another using a combustible engine? the fuq is that shit???

However, then you have your conspiracy/spoiler-y posts

the last time I cared about massive conspiracies and long-term spoilers was back during the most recent Star Wars drama regarding ultimate Big Bads, Rey's parents, Reylo (and whether it was right/wrong), etc. and honestly? I got done with it so fuckin fast

maybe 5, 10 years ago I would have been right there with you, digging around every screen capture I could find, trying to find hidden clues about Zoro's parents or who the fuck Shanks actually is (besides some bumfuck pirate who spends most of his time making poor fashion choices while drunk on deserted islands)

maybe accidentally seeing the prevailing theory about the All Blue wouldn't have made me so upset back then. but holy fuckers, I'm like....livid about it now. that was one of the mysteries that I was enjoying toying around with in my head, allowing myself the pleasure of just enjoying a really goddamn great story with mystery and wonder for the literal first time in ~15 years (English Major, then freelance writer for the collegiate-level educational field, etc, so lots of analyzing and picking up clues and hints about how stories will end and why i could tell)

and after doing that for so long..............movies and books and stories don't get fun anymore. It's like you're constantly trying to outsmart the author and figure out plots and twists and endings without experiencing the story they've created for you

so like.........basically I don't wanna go to the One Piece tag at the end of the day and see someone's VERY LONG post about who Shanks really is behind the scenes, like they've watched the show three times in 8 days and finished the whole manga in 3 just for this assignment, and they've found all the evidence that supports their conclusion, and now, they're presenting it to me and not putting it under a cut or whatever

and I mean, if that type of analysis and writing is fun for them, more power to them. but just to them specifically

the problem is that i see it on the tag

even if I don't read the post, even if I quickly scroll past after realizing what it is, I still see the title and scan a few of the first lines. so now my ruminating ADHD mind won't ever let me forget that I know a potential major plot point, and the massive gaping hole which is leading me to that conclusion desperately wants to be filled with information

ugh. anyways.

HERE ARE THE CONSPIRACIES THAT I ACTUALLY WANT TO SEE ON THE TAG

whether or not Luffy has a hard time whacking himself off bc he keeps pulling at his dick harder and faster and more erraticly, which for a normal dick would be fine, but for a gummy dick would be like trying to whack off with those glittery stress water cucumbers

whether Sanji is a total virgin (he is...nobody needs to answer that for me) (and if you backtalk and say he's not a virgin, then you're wrong)

whether Zoro is a virgin (common sense tells me that there's NO WAY that motherfucker hasn't put that body and muscular jaw to good use, but on the other hand, he's also the type who 1) is either uninterested in sex bc it doesn't bring him closer to his goal, or 2) ignores sex because it may distract him from his goal)

what form does Chopper take when he has to use the bathroom? does he even use a bathroom? or does he wander into the wilderness like a reindeer and let it plop out like old times?

if you were suddenly Pleasantville'd into One Piece, who would you really actually fucking be? (not who you WANNA be, but who you'd legit turn into bc they're absolutely you) (i'd be Chimney and Gonbe...my soul would split in half and occupy their tiny little bodies while i created rabid chaos on a miniature scale)

Also when I'm scrolling through tags, I wanna see fan art (not of Zosan though...stop drawing pictures of my boyfriend cheating on me with that greasy ashtray). I wanna see jokes. I wanna see smut (good smut, please, for the love of everything). I wanna have a super fun, light-hearted time with One Piece and basically dick around with people on the tag. but it just sucks bc I don't feel like I can ever scroll through the tags because those random spoiler-y posts that come up unexpectedly absolutely ruin it for me

idk idk idk i'm tired and going to bed now

#this post has no point and i have a 100+ fever writing it #if you're the person who recently wrote about shanks: this isn't personal...it's just that your post was the last one i saw #good for you for enjoying One Piece like that tho #all i want is for you to enjoy your spoiler-y conspiracies and for me to enjoy my bullshit on separate planes of existence #one piece

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judgement-free-sideblog · 5 years

Text

Dancing lessons

Barry Berkman x reader

Summary: Barry is finally cast in a feature, the problem? He said he could dance and now he can either disappoint Sally or found a way to learn some steps.

Warnings: Swearing, blood, violence, guns, cheating maybe.

Part 1 ● Part 2 ● Part 3 ● Part 4 ● Part 5 ● Part 6 ● Part 7 ● Part 8 ● Epilogue

Part 2

One week after the first time Barry meet Y/N he was nowhere near learning tango, let alone dancing on the level his stupid resume said he could, he only have ended with horrible pain on his knees, thighs and back. And he hasn't even practice dancing with music yet, apparently his instructor thought he first had to learn one basic step and repeat it a million times before he could start doing the "flashy and presumptuous" step, as she called them, that the director may want.

"You really don't have to worry" Sally said during breakfast, they have an agreement to spend the night at least twice a week in each other apartment but he could tell she rather if he stayed at hers since Jermaine and Nick didn't get along with her. "That girl you say is dancing with you, I just heard from Lindsay that she is totally sleeping with the director so probably the scene is an excuse to show her dancing talent and they will be focusing on her instead of you" She drank the rest of her orange juice and stood up quickly "God is so late" she checked her phone and gave him a kiss on the cheek before taking her purse and keys and rush to the door "I'll see you tonight ok? Good luck!"

"Bye, I love..." And then she was gone. "You" He finished his breakfast and took his own car to the studio where he had to finish filming his scenes.

"Barry you're here, excellent!" Andre said when he arrived, thankfully he was not the star of the film and he didn't have to listen the hundred of notes he had for the leads nor taking all the shit the PAs get from him. "Look" He said pointing at his tablet "Janice is on New York for three more weeks for a Ballet presentation, but she sent this to me, is the perfect choreography for the scene. What do you think?" He showed her a clip of Janice and some professional dancer with a song he didn't knew, probably in Spanish or Italian, dancing incredibly close, with several lifts and spins.

"Great" He said feeling dizzy "Flashy and presumptuous" He add really low.

"What was that?"

"Classy and marvelous, is a modern take on the Argentine style isn't?" He said repeating what Y/N had said to him the day before.

"I have no idea, but hey you are the expert" He gave him a pat on the back. "You can start rehearsing with Janice when she gets back" He didn't like that kind of touching, it reminded him of Fuches and make him feel uneasy.

"Sure, great, hey could you send me that video, you know to study her movements" he tried to sound casual and not frightened as he was.

"Yeah sure" he said and with a hand gesture urged him to move to the set where he got to start shooting.

The minute he was over he drove back to Y/N's studio and saw her giving her class to young girls all dressed as ballerinas, she was wearing a black seetrough dancing skirt over a leotard, and his eyes lingered on her legs a few seconds more than he should mesmerized as he was by the elegance she used to dance.

"Barry you are early" She saluted him with a smile, "Girls say hi to Mr. Block" she said at the mass of pink and white.

"Hi Mr. Block" They cheered.

"I'll be done in a few minutes but this really is a private rehearsal" She pat her lips with one finger thinking "Would you mind waiting upstairs? I mean I would hate for you to drive back home to come back in less than an hour, and the coffee place on this block sucks" She said and the girls start laughing "Don't tell your mothers" She quickly add.

"I don't want to be a burden"

"Oh nonsense, you are not, go upstairs, I have food on the fridge but I wouldn't recommend it since you are dancing later and the WiFi password is written next to the phone" She insisted and he finally accept.

The apartment was just a little bigger than the one he rented with Jermaine and had a nice walls on a blue shade that reminded him of the ocean. And a big window facing directly to the door, so the first thing you see when you entered were the rooftop of other buildings and the hills in the back.

He entered feeling himself as an intruder, but being honest that was a common feeling for him, even if he haven't break in any place in over a year, a very long year, and again the pain of thinking of Fuches maybe lurking around strike him in the chest.

He found a place to sit and after being 5 minutes in complete silence trying to not be alone with his thoughts he took out his laptop to watch the dance again. Next to the landline was a nice picture of Y/N on his wedding dress next to a man that must be her husband with golden letters and numbers written over: JPTLV150813.

Once he was connected he allow himself to look around, the living room was tastefully decorated and there were some framed paintings of wild flowers on the wall in purples and pinks. He glance at their dinner table in the other room next to her kitchen, and while he was still holding he picture his mind start wandering, maybe Sally would like to live with him in a place like that. Full of light and peaceful.

He picture himself waking every morning and walking towards the kitchen to make her breakfast, she getting out of the set exhausted, to get a glass of wine in the living room. Reading lines together in the couch, and falling asleep there watching a movie.

And then since he hadn't sleep wery well and Y/N couch was madly comfortable he fall asleep still holding the picture and suddenly Sally's face start fading away, and Y/N replaced her, in a blue version of the clothes she was wearing earlier, he saw himself dancing with her on the living room, a slow and romantic rhythm, and instead of her husband it was him smiling on the picture next to the phone. She would come upstairs tired from work and he would stop her at the door to give her a passionate kiss... then the sound of a gun going off came from the window and a blood stain start forming in her chest running and she collapsing on his arms, and then it was Sally lifeless body again who he was holding and she whispered before losing her breath You did this and fearful he looked at his own hand holding the gun...

"Barry?" Y/N's voice came from the door, and immediately woke up and shake those horrifying ideas from his mind.

"Here" He call from the couch and was careful enough to not look back and don't picture her covered in blood

"I'm so done, boy I'm glad you came upstairs, Amanda's mother is a pain in the ass, if she have seen you she would have called the cops or something" She said and sit in next of him, she was already wearing the heels she used to practice with him. "What you got there?" She said looking at the screen where the video of Janice was still on.

"Is the dance I'm supposed to do for the movie" He said glad to have something to said and he showed her the clip.

"Well... you are screwed" She said after it was finish and he gave her an imploring look. "I'm kidding, I mean is a monstrosity of showing off, and her technique is not perfect, but I'm pretty sure you can put together something, like Ed Sheeran on Thinking out loud". She said confidently.

"Who?" He asked with no idea of what she meant.

"He is a British singer, we are probably too old to know him, but couples come all the time trying to learn his routine for their wedding" She said, but his face was still puzzled "You are not very familiar with pop culture, for an actor living in L.A. I mean" She stood up and walked towards her kitchen "Do you want anything? I have wine, beer, orange juice?" She called from the other room.

"Beer is fine, and is because I only became an actor recently" He said with some embarrassment in his voice taking the bottleshe offered him "I used to amm... sell auto parts in Cleveland"

"Ohio, that's ... far" she said taking a sip of her drink.

"And before that I was a Marine" He add and she almost spit her beer but did her best to pass it down.

"Oh wow, that's unusual. I would definitely say thank you for your service, but I'm antiwar so what if I gave you a 10 percent off on the lessons and we call it even?" She grin at him

"Don't worry about that, I don't like to make a big deal about it anyway" He said sincerely "Also I'm pretty sure you are wasting your time with me"

"Don't be so harsh on yourself, here look" She took the laptop off his hands and found a video of a ginger man singing a cheezy song about eternal love "See he is not properly dancing, but he act like he is, so first you have to learn how to lead, come on take off your shoes"

"Take them off? Why?" He asked while she got rid off her heels and let her bare feet touch the wooden floor.

"Because, and I mean this with respect" She said standing and looking for a record to put in her old record player until she found one "You are huge, and I'm afraid you would step on me with those shoes" a slow rhythm start playing and he did what she asked and stood barefoot in front of her.

"That doesn't sound like the other songs" Although he like it.

"Because you have to learn to walk before you can run, now, put both of your hands on my hips" She said getting closer to him.

"Like this?" It was funny how without the heels she was way shorter and couldn't completely reach her neck so she settled for put both hands on his shoulders.

"Fine now listen to the music and move" She said moving her body rhythmically "There you go, now move me, lead, right or left, is your choice" She said letting him take small steps and occasionally looking down to watch his feet.

"This is not that bad actually" Barry was actually enjoying himself, then the music start going faster and she took his right hand on hers and pull away from him and he chose to ignore the feeling of lost that caused him.

"Now, the hand on my back has to be steady, and lead, we can spin" She said and taught him how "Or we can walk" She started walking back slowly letting him follow the steps at his own pace. "Is all about who is leading" She gave him a smile and they kept dancing until the music was ending and since he had confidence now he make her spin and catch her on his arm like Janice's partner did on the clip.

"Sorry I always wanted to try that" he said once she was standing next to him.

"It was great, you are getting it, now we can try to improve your actual steps, but we should go downstairs, my husband is about to comeback and he hates having music on when he is working" She put on her shoes again and walked out followed by Barry.

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losingmymindtonight · 6 years

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Ooooh - you ask me for fluff??? Have you considered TONY AND PETER WATCHING MERLIN??????? All the way from the adorkable beginning to the angsty angsty end??? Bcs I'm betting Tony would have some jokes about Merlin keeping his secret about as well as Peter does. 😂😂

I was born to write this

Today is Merlin’s 10 year anniversary! I miss my dumb boys…

Merlin spoilers ahead!

Also this… might not make any sense at all if you haven’t watched Merlin? I couldn’t really help it.

“What’re we watching, again?”

Peter plopped down beside Tony and tucked himself into the man’s side, a maneuver perfected through countless days of practice. “It’s an old BBC show called Merlin.”

“And why are we watching it?”

“Because MJ told me that if I didn’t, she’d spoil the ending.” Peter blinked up at him innocently. Tony sort of hated that it wasn’t an act. The kid really was that pure. “And because you said we could binge watch whatever I wanted.”

He had said that, to be fair.

It was Peter’s spring break, and May was out of town. At May’s request, he’d happily volunteered to have the kid over for the week. It wasn’t that they didn’t trust Peter to be alone for that long, exactly…

Okay, actually, yeah. Neither he nor May trusted the kid to be alone for that long.

Could anyone blame them? He was a magnet for trouble. Tony was surprised Peter could walk five steps on the street without someone trying to detach his head from his body.

And so, in the name of what May called his “co-parental service hours,” Tony’s weekend would be spent watching a cancelled BBC show and living off of microwave popcorn and delivered pizzas.

He guessed that there were definitely worse things to be doing.

“So,” Peter maneuvered through the Netflix interface like it was a second skin. He tried not to be jealous, “give me a rundown. On what kind of journey are we about to embark?”

“It’s a show about Merlin-”

“Holy shit, I would’ve never guessed…”

“Hey!” Peter laughed, hovering the mouse over the first episode. “It’s like a ‘what if?’ story. What if Merlin and Arthur were the same age, and Merlin was Arthur’s servant instead of this wise old wizard? It’s supposed to be really good.”

I can’t wait. “Alright, kid. Let’s have at it.”

Peter hit play and tossed the remote onto the coffee table, leaning his head against the top of Tony’s chest as the first scene faded into view.

“No young man, no matter how great, can know his destiny. He cannot glimpse his part in the great story that is about to unfold. Like everyone, he must live and learn. And so it will be for the young warlock arriving at the gates of Camelot. A boy that will, in time, father the legend. His name: Merlin.”

And, damn it, Tony could already feel himself drawing the parallels between the gangly kid on the screen and the gangly kid curled up next to him.

Peter had no idea, did he? He couldn’t see the path that Tony saw winding further every day.

He had no idea that he was going to change the world.

He watched the Evil King character execute some random sorcerer with a weird taste in his mouth.

It felt too real, too present. Too close to what Tony imaged Ross would do to Peter if he ever got his hands on him…

He shook the thoughts away. No. This was supposed to be fun. They were binge watching a lighthearted show over the kid’s spring break. The occasion did not lend itself to thoughts like that.

He decided that he liked Gaius from the old physician’s very first scene. He voiced that thought to Peter, quietly, during a lull in the dialogue.

“Why?”

Tony shrugged. “He’s gonna suffer.”

Peter dropped his head back, craning his neck painfully, to stare up at his mentor with wide eyes. “He is?”

He chuckled, letting the sound release some of the tension from Peter’s gaze. “Of course he is. His job is to keep the reckless kid alive. It’s not easy, let me tell you.”

Peter hit Tony with a pillow, and the episode rolled on.

“Tell me, Merlin, do you know how to walk on your knees?”

A flare of protectiveness for his Peter-stand in flared in Tony’s chest.

He shifted Peter a little closer, as if protecting his kid would protect the one on the screen as well.

He decided all at once that he didn’t like Arthur. He didn’t like him even a little bit.

“He’s an asshole.”

Peter seemed unperturbed. He played with the cuff of Tony’s shirt lazily, eyes tracking the scene. “People can change, Mister Stark. You did, didn’t you?” The kid smiled his special, unburdened smile. “Give him a chance.”

It occurred to him that maybe, just maybe, he hated Arthur because the prince reminded him of an outdated version of himself.

Young, brazen, self-centered, cruel. Blind to the ways his actions could hurt and maim and kill. Following doggedly in the over-sized footsteps his father left. Driven by false arrogance, one-size-fits-all ideals, and overwhelming bitterness on his tongue.

He sighed. “Sure, kid. I’ll give Prince Asshole a chance.”

As it turned out, his forced sympathy for Arthur his deadbeat dad was a lot harder to hold onto than he thought it might be.

This Merlin character really knew how to look like a kicked puppy.

“I’m not a monster, am I?”

“Don’t ever think that.”

Tony tightened his grip around Peter’s back at the same moment the teenager shifted to cling tighter.

He wanted to tell the kid that Gaius was right, and that Prince Asshole was wrong. He wanted to tell him that Merlin wasn’t a monster. That nobody could help who they were, and that it wasn’t anything to be ashamed of.

He wanted to tell Peter that he wasn’t a monster, a freak, a mistake. He wanted to make sure he knew that Tony would tear down anyone who said otherwise.

Instead, he just smoothed a hand through Peter’s bangs and hoped he could feel it through the solidity of their half-embrace.

“If you can’t tell me, no one can.”

The first season fell away along with the daylight.

He watched Merlin, who he had to repetitively remind himself was not Peter, stumble through a million different mistakes. He watched him drink some poison (stupid), harbor some fugitive child right under the Evil King’s nose (stupid), and offer up his life in exchange for Prince Asshole’s (stupidstupidstupid).

It felt like every turn the character took made him want to smash his head into the nearest wall. Repetitively.

(On the other hand, Prince Asshole was slowly, and painfully, growing on him. Not that he was ready to admit that to Peter, of course.)

The final episode of the season faded into credits, and Tony wordlessly flicked off the TV.

“Hey.” The kid’s protest might have held more weight if his eyes weren’t closed and the words weren’t soft with sleepiness. “One more.”

Tony made sure to keep his voice low and soothing, carding his fingers through the kid’s mess of curls. “You won’t even concentrate on it.”

“Will too.”

“Oh?” He turned the screen back on, slyly lowering the volume and hitting play on the next episode. “Okay then, buddy. Whatever you say.”

Peter’s breaths had evened out before the opening sequence could finish.

That night, Tony decided that sleeping on the couch was way underrated.

There wasn’t even a question of what they’d be doing the next morning. He sent Peter wordlessly to shower, ordered a couple of pizzas, and hit play the moment that the kid was re-situated on the couch, wet curls soaking into the front of his t-shirt.

At some point in the middle of the season, during an episode about a witchfinder, he let out an involuntary groan.

It was almost like this kid didn’t want to keep his magic a secret. At the very least, it seemed like he jumped at nearly every opportunity to reveal himself.

Peter flickered his eyes away from the screen and gave Tony a questioning look. “What?”

He rolled his eyes. “Merlin’s about as good at keeping his secret as you are at keeping yours.”

“That’s not true!” Peter’s glare just made him look younger. Tony nearly laughed at the way his face scrunched up. “Barely anybody knows I’m Spider-Man!”

“I figured it out, kid.”

“You’re you-”

“Ned.”

“To be fair, I didn’t know he was-”

“MJ.”

“She’s terrifyingly observant-”

“May.”

“She walked in on me!”

“Sure thing, kiddo.” Tony ruffled his hair playfully. “Why don’t you just shout it from the rooftops, huh? Might be a little more efficient, that way.”

Peter blinked, then huffed, physically turning away from Tony and fixing his eyes back on the screen. It was a clear dismissal, despite the fact that didn’t move away from the warmth of his mentor’s side.

The second season’s finale went to credits, and Peter stalled Tony’s hand before he could switch off the TV.

“C’mon, Mister Stark! We could totally watch the next season! It’ll only take, like, a few more hours.”

“Your idea of ‘a few more hours’ is actually about 8 hours, kiddo.”

“And?”

“You need sleep.”

“We’ve stayed up later in the lab.”

“On accident.”

“So?”

He tried his best to mimic May’s I am an adult and you will listen to me voice. “No, Peter.”

He kid blinked up at him imploringly. “Please.”

(The third season was good.)

They watched the two part series finale on Tuesday morning.

And, frankly, Tony wasn’t sure what he’d expected. But it sure as hell wasn’t… that.

“Just, just, just… just hold me. Please.”

Peter curled himself around Tony with a little whine. He rubbed the kid’s back comfortingly, gaze still transfixed on the screen. “No. He’s not supposed to die, Mister Stark. He’s supposed to live. He’s-He’s the Once and Future King. What about Albion? What about Merlin?”

He wondered if he could sue the BBC for making his kid cry.

“There’s something I want to say…”

“You’re not going to say goodbye.”

“No. Merlin. Everything you’ve done. I know now. For me, for Camelot. For the kingdom you helped me build…”

“You’d have done it without me.”

“Maybe. I want to say… something I’ve never said to you before. Thank you.”

He watched the character die with a weird feeling in his chest.

He’d never been one for sentiment in general, and certainly not for fictional characters. But… something about Merlin and Arthur had made him think of Peter and himself.

Peter’s voice was small. “Merlin would’ve trade places with him.”

Tony’s answer came so quickly that it surprised him. “Arthur would never want him to.”

You ever try trading places with me, kid, and I’ll kill you my damn self.

“But what’s the point?” There were undercurrents to Peter’s tone that told Tony they weren’t just talking about the show anymore. Apparently, he wasn’t the only one drawing parallels. “If I were Merlin, I’d rather die than live without Arthur.”

He tried not to hear the implicit I’d rather die than live without you in the kid’s words.

“Someone always dies first, kiddo. That’s just life.”

Peter buried his face into Tony’s shirt, sniffling a little. “Yeah, well, I don’t like it.”

He set a gentle hand on the back of his head, shielding him from the screen, the daylight, the world.

“I don’t like this ending, either.”

Tony took a deep breath, focusing on the way his ribs pressed into Peter’s at the apex. “If it makes you feel any better, kiddo, neither do I.”

He’d pondered his death a lot. Once, he’d thought towards it with a perverted sense of lust.

But Pepper, Rhodey, Peter had changed that. Now, he just felt a peaceful acceptance. He wouldn’t go rushing to his grave but, when the time came, he couldn’t see himself reeling against it, either.

But for the first time, he thought about Peter.

If everything went the way it naturally should, he would die long before the kid.

He’d get to die, and Peter would have to keep living.

His parents’ deaths still left a hollow ache in his chest. He missed his mother with every single breath.

Is that what he’d be doing to Peter, when he died? Leaving him damaged irreparably? Dooming him to a life of sewing up his tattered grief?

He swallowed, hard, and shook his head.

Peter would be okay, because he’d prepare Peter. He’d give him everything he needed to do more than just survive once he and May were both gone.

He was going to make sure Peter thrived.

And he’d do everything he could not to leave the kid like Arthur left Merlin, or like his mother left him. Not violently, not suddenly, not in the heart of some blood-stained tragedy.

He’d linger, if he could. He’d grow old (something he used to shudder at the thought of). He’d give the kid’s kids too much sugar and poke him with his cane and complain about the technology Peter would incorporate into his newest invention to shroud the pride.

As he watched the final credits role over the dark screen, Tony Stark decided that he hated tragedies.

He also decided that he wouldn’t let his own life become one.

#irondad fluff fest #merlin owns my soul #happy anniversary to my two special bois #and my og fandom #merlin spoilers #irondad #spiderson #tony & peter #tony stark #peter parker #losingmymindtonight writes

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shield-agent78 · 5 years

Text

Linguistics: Chapter 2

Sparing Day

Summary: Ema is a linguists specialist who works at the newest SHIELD facility in upstate New York. She has been through a lot of hard times. Soon she meets a super soldier with a metal arm that she can't get enough of and the feeling is very mutual.

Paring: Bucky X OC (Ema)

Warnings: language and fluff

Rating: PG-13

A/N: Please tag and re-blog so I can share my work with others. I appreciate any comments.

(Present Day)

The morning sunlight flooded into the windows of my two-story apartment. Washing the night away with its' warmth and glow. It found me once again, on my living room couch. It was nothing new for me to experience a broken sleep pattern. Just like many nights, I had returned home wanting more in the pit of my stomach. But not knowing what this want was, it gave me a sense of anxiousness that often caused nightmares.

I woke to the sound of my own scream echoing through the room. In my dream I had relieved my past, the one consumed with a H.Y.D.R.A agent that I had barely known, being killed in an explosion and then appearing in front of me, standing in my small office in the compound. Blood dripping from the ceiling. Try to get a grip Ema, I told myself as I began to slowly control my breathing. Suddenly, I heard a knock at my door. "Ugh, one moment," I called out as I pulled myself up and off of the couch. Girl you know you probably look like shit after that dream. Why do you keep having them anyway. . . I looked out the peephole only to discover Steve, damp from his morning run. His white tee shirt hung on him perfectly and he wore a pair of gray sweatpants. Over the three years I had been here, Steve had become the older brother I never had. I unlocked the door and moved to my kitchen to pour two cups of coffee.

"Ema," I heard him call out his voice full of concern. "I'm coming in."

"I figured you were, so come on." He entered I handed him one of the mugs and gave him a sleepy smile. I sat down on the bar stool and he sat across from me.

"Another rough night, Ema?" His blue eyes flashed concern as he sat down at my bar and began to drink his coffee.

"You can say that. Just another stupid nightmare. It's your fault.” I have them since you told me I had to start training with you all. I smirked at him as I sipped my coffee. He huffed and gave me his Cap glare.

"You know I'm putting you in advance training agent because we need you out on the field soon so you got to learn the basic fighting skills."

"Basic? You must mean the kick ass and take name skills.”

“Hell yes.”

“Ok, yes I know, Cap." I said in my best southern accent as I rolled my eyes at him. Steve let out a hardy laugh.

"You know that southern charm of yours isn't going to work on me."

"Well you know you can take the girl out of the south but not the south out of the girl," I said interrupting with a giggle.

"You're not getting out of sparing day. So be there 8:30 don't be late Jones," he smirked as he finished his coffee, placing the mug in the sink and walking out the door locking it behind him.

I looked at the clock. Dammit! It was already 7:30. I quickly ate breakfast, before going into my bedroom to change. As I got dressed in my tank and shorts I came to the realization that the only ones today are going to be Natasha, Steve, Bucky and myself. "Ugh," I groaned. Steve and Natasha know I have a major crush on one Mr. Bucky Barnes. How long has this flirting game been going on between the two of us now? A year or so. I looked at myself in the mirror pulling up my shoulder-length brown hair into a high ponytail. Maybe Steve will have mercy on me and pair me with him today, but not likely. I grabbed my keys and gym bag off the counter and headed out to my car to make my daily drive the compound.

I scanned my ID badge as I walked into the compound's gym. Weights, punching bags, sparring mats, and kickboxing dummies lined the gym area. I picked up a towel and water as I scanned the room trying to find Natasha. As usual, she was in the middle of kickboxing. I walked over to her and placed my blue duffel on the bench beside her.

"Good morning Ema. How are you?" she asked as she continued her brutal attack on the dummy. I leaned against a boxing bag with my arms crossed beside her.

"Oh, just fine. But I just hate sparing day." I gripped letting out a small huff. "I know that Cap says I need to learn advanced fighting skills but, I also know who you and he are going to pair me with." Please pair me with him. No don’t I mean yes do. UGH!

Natasha stopped and looked at me with a slight smile, her hands resting on her hips. "I've seen the way you both look at each other. You both like each other. I just wish one of you would make a move already. In fact, it’s starting to get old."

"I know. I mean yes he is handsome," I giggled "but he is never going to ask me out so just drop it please." I pleaded.

"What are you waiting for? Superman? You need to take a chance here Ema. Time to let go of the past." Fine, I know.

As we talked Steve and Bucky came into the gym placing their bags down close to the exit. Bucky wore a black a line shirt that shown his muscles beautifully and a pair of gray sweatpants that hug slightly below his hips. My mouth became dry as I bit my lip googling him. The room felt like it had become at least twenty degrees hotter. I pulled on my tank a little trying to get some air.

"You ok?" Natasha questioned me with an eyebrow raised.

"Oh yes," I said trying to get my composer, "I ugh, just think the temp of the room just went up. Is it hot in here to you?"

Natasha looked at me and laughed. "That is it, I am going to find a way to set you two up, especially since you are overheating and he hasn't been able to take his eyes off you since he has come in." I picked over my shoulder. She was right, Bucky was staring at me with a slight smile talking to Steve. I felt my facing getting red.

"Come on. Warm up." Natasha pulled me along to the sparing mat for our daily warm-up routine.

(1 Hour Later)

I found myself flat on my back again. "Your getting distracted," She teased as her green eyes fixed upon me. "Focus!"

" I'm not distracted," I hissed.

"Sure that's why I've been able to put you your ass on this mat for the last three rounds straight." Down again I went with a thud. "Now four." She laughed. I looked over to the right to see two Greek gods sparing about 75 feet away from us. Hince the distraction.

"No just ugh I'm just taken in the view." She laughed loudly causing Bucky to look my direction, his eyes now fixed upon me. Apparently that all it took for his match to be over because he landed with a thud with his back against the mat. Look away now. Look. Away. Now. My eyes were still glued on him. I just got caught checking him out. Oh god, help me.

"Would one of you just make a move already!." Nat said a little too loud for me as she helped me up off the mat.

"I have no idea what you mean," I mumbled as I bit at my fingernails.

"You're not a good lair Ema." I gave her a dirty look. Nat just smiled and began laughing at me.

"Don't worry you know he is a gentleman."

"I'm so glad you find this amusing."

"Settle a bet would ya. Which one of us are you staring at?" I heard his voice boom over the radio toward us. Oh lord help me.

"Why would she stare at either one of your two losers?" Natasha yelled back teasing them.

"Smug aren't ya," I said loud enough for Bucky to hear. He just shook his head giving a chuckle.

"I'm going to the whatever is next and then maybe to shoot myself," I giggled. Now he had to be giggling. I don't giggle!

"You'll thank me for this later,” she said as she walked toward Bucky.

Oh no, no NAT! I should have seen that coming. Before I could get the words out I heard Natasha talking with Bucky in Rusian, of course, one of the languages I was not fluent in.

"Ты перестанешь пялиться на нее и просто пригласишь ее уже?" (Would you stop gawking at her and just ask her out already?) She said quietly motioning to me with her head as she spoke.

"Откуда ты знаешь, что она пойдет?" (How do you know she would go?) He responded quietly.

"Поверь мне, она будет." (Trust me, she will.)

"Хорошо, возможно я буду." (Okay, maybe I will.) Bucky stated with a lopsided smile.

Natasha turned back to me and gave me a smile. "Problem solved," she said with a wink and walked over to Steve.

"Ok, so here is the pair up for today's practice," Steve said as he began wrapping his hands with boxing tape, "Nat and I need to work on advanced karate techniques for the next mission. Buck, you're with Ema. She needs to begin her advanced training."

Bucky gave a slight smile and began walking up to me not taking his eyes off of mine. My throat became immediately dry. I backed up stepping on the sparring mat behind me. "Um, so what did she tell you?" Maybe I could get him talking that way I can catch him off guard.

"You know, I would enjoy answering all your questions but now is not the time Doll," he teased. Bucky's eyes were now on my legs with a mischievous grin.

"Hey Barns, I'm up here" as I pointed to my face. I knew he was going to sweep my legs out from under me. He just gave me a slow chuckle.

"Do you really think you're going to win, Ema?" He questioned his blue eyes shining. No not really.

"No, but I was just hoping that my southern charm would help me out." I said as I tried to kick his legs out from underneath him. I failed miserably. Great. Come on you know this Jones. With one firm kick, I felt the mat on my back as I was being held down across my waist with a cold metal arm with one Bucky close to my face.

"Let me up you big ox!" I teased with a slight smile trying to nudge him off of me.

"Big ox? That's a new one on me Doll." He laughed getting up and then offering his hand to help me up. "You are a tease," he mumbled under his breath.

I just shook my head and smiled. "And you're a flirt," I said looking up at him through my eyelashes. Another chuckled echoed through Bucky's chest. He stepped back and got into a ready stance.

"Come on, try it again.”

We worked together for several hours. By the time it was over, I was out of breath and wishing he would ask me out. We sat down together on the bench by the door getting our breaths sipping on water. Maybe I should just ask him out to a movie. I mean we have gone together as friends. Yep, we are good friends. Breath.

"So, Ema I was wondering if you would like to get dinner sometime?" Bucky said a little shyly. Did he really just asked me out. "Tomorrow night," he continued. "Would seven be ok?"

"Sure. I would really like that. Call me or text me with the details." Bucky squeezed my hand. I think I felt electricity go through me. I got up to leave but turned around. "Hey Sergent, be on time. I’ve been kept waiting long enough." Oh damn. He looked at me and gave me a gin.

I walked out the gym door as I heard him quietly say "Yes!"

@catsandbooksinafarawayplace

@jewelofwinter @teamcap4bucky @babyinatrenchcoatlover @verygraphicink @kombatfather1796

#bucky barnes #bucky #bucky x reader #bucky x oc

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itoshit · 3 years

Note

Time slowly went by, days turning to nights. And nights turning to days. That day, when I left Vee, I didn't think it would have been the last time I saw her. But she left. My men found her quickly of course, some even offered me to bring her back to me. But the whole point was to not be in contact anymore. I refused to see any picture of her, to see what she was up to. Ran's reports were enough for me. My heart was hurting me, especially when I learnt the existence of her friend, Darren. I was in the private room of one of our clubs, and Ran showed me a picture of them together. She seemed happy, healthy. And I was glad to be out of her life at that moment because honestly, I shattered everything and everyone that I touched.

It was not too long after I cut our strings. I remember that night vividly because that was my very first step to hell. Drinking to forget what I saw, I apparently passed out. Sanzu was the one bringing me back home. My place didn't look good anymore, but I didn't care. No one would stay here except me anyway. I wasn't even sleeping in my bed anymore, not that I was sleeping in the first place. But I couldn't do it. Too hard. Her scent lingered everywhere in my room, in her room. The small amount of sleep that I had was spent on my couch. Christmas went by too, and nothing happened. Her coat and the concert ticket were left untouched in my bedroom, in a random drawer. That evening, I stayed alone in my apartment, trying to imagine what it would have been with Vee around. We would have probably been drinking and laughing, making out on my couch. I'm sure she would have wanted me to buy a Christmas tree, and we would have decorated it together. And the night would have finished somewhere in my apartment, both naked and drowning in each other's touch.

Six months have passed. I tried so hard to forget her face with the many girls trying to get into my pants. I tried so, so hard. But I've never been able to touch someone else. Vee was like a drug, and I was experiencing it. But I was so content for her, she looked like she was finally balancing everything in her life, and she was probably grateful for that. She probably didn't want me back in her life, and I would never dare to enter hers anyway. She must felt relief after all that ended up.

I went back to the Mikey I was before meeting Vee, the cold; heartless man I used to be. My black hair was the only different thing from that past.

Every night I recalled our moment spent together, the only vestige of her was in mind.

Well, my vision seemed to be quite subjective and false, because on few occasions, the guys talked to me. Kakucho, Sanzu, Takeomi and Ran were the ones telling me how I changed, in a bad way. To them, I was more reckless. There were probably right, not that it mattered anyway.

Dante and La Cosa Nostra became close allies, the first trying his best to ease my heart. He presented me to his wife and children, and they were probably the ones who helped me getting through all that shit.

My life didn't make sense anymore. Without Vee by my side, I could finally say it, I was nothing. A dead man walking. While she looked so... full of life.

I saw Senju multiple times, and what I said to Vee was obviously completely false. I've never let myself be tempted with her flirt. The Yamaguchi-gumi stayed on the low for a while too, making their presence known from time to time.

They attacked one of our clubs once, and I almost died in the process. That's maybe what the guys reproached me when they said that I was reckless. Luckily though, Sanzu helped me. Got shot close to the heart, would have died if he didn't push me at the last minute.

The not so discreet scar that I had on my chest was a daily reminder that life was, even for me, something ephemeral.

Tonight was no different than the other nights. Would drown myself in work, files, alcohol and memories of Vee. That scared me because I was slowly starting to forget the sound of her voice.

Mikey.

Hm?

You can't keep doing that

Doing what?

You're not living, you're just... surviving. Amico mio, it's not good. Even Luka noticed your pain, shall I remind you he's only 8? You need to do something.

Look Dante, I appreciate your concern but I'm working right now. Did you call me to say something else?

Your girl has been-

She's not mine anymore. I lost her long ago.

... Venus is going outside tonight. Ran told me and as requested from you, my men keep an eye on her. She hasn't been outside since you stopped talking. You should come and-

Scoffing at him, I rolled my eyes, forehead pressed against my hand.

Dante, just... don't. She's clearly better off without me, and the Yamaguchi-gumi understood she wasn't someone who counted for -

But that was a lie! Manjiro. You could try again with her! We could finish them off, and you two could be happy together. It's just-

No we won't. They got the message when we blew their hideout up. No needs to start something big like this once again, especially when we all know the finality of it.

And what is if if you're so sure of yourself? You know what? I'm gonna bring her to you tonight. You're always staying at your office, expect her and I to be here.

... Venus doesn't need me. She realised she didn't miss me, and that I was only a cancer in her life. I need to go, don't call me again. Thank you for what you did back then.

Hanging up, I left my phone on my desk, leaving my office, but not before asking my executives to meet me in our meeting room.

What's up Mikey?

All sat around me, I looked at them first, before speaking.

Just, thanks for what you did for me.

Snorting, Sanzu stared at me, pupils dilated.

Why does it look like farewells though?

You can leave, you have your evening off. Find some pussy to fuck, get drunk, get high. Do what you want. I want you all to be here tomorrow before 8am.

Groaning, Sanzu stood up, and was the first to leave the room.

You okay?

Of course I am Ran.

Nodding, he patted my shoulder while Rindou simply smiled at me.

Koko had an eyebrow raised.

What's up with you Mikey?

Nothing. You can go Hajime.

Eh? First time you're saying my name. But alright, goodnight Mikey

Now alone with Mochizuku and Takeomi, I turned to them.

Guess I'll head to the strip club then.

Go ahead Kanji

Door closing, I felt Takeomi's eyes on me.

What?

What are you up to Mikey?

Nothing, just need a night away from work. Why aren't you leaving?

Raising his hands in defeat, Takeomi stood up, and as he was going to exit the meeting's room, he stilled.

Manjiro. Don't do anything stupid yeah?

No worries.

Eventually alone, I sat back on the chair, chin on my crossed hands. Would I regret what I was about to do? Probably not. Vee gave me hope, showing me some good time. But I wasn't destined to happiness. My place was in darkness, in hell.

An hour passed, and directing myself to my office, I checked the security cameras. It was 9pm, everyone left the building, as I requested beforehand.

Turning one last time to my office, I suddenly imagined Vee here, with me. Taking my gun off my hoster, I put it on my desk. Closing the door behind me, I went to the roof.

The last time that I've been here was when Sanzu surprised me, and when I said to him that if I happened to die, he would take the lead.

Guess nothing has changed since then.

Approaching my feet from the edge, I looked behind, a flash blinding me for a while. The good old days, when I was Toman's leader, Ken-chin by my side. Takemichi, Mitsuya, Chifuyu, the Kawata twins and the others were below, acclaiming me.

How were they doing now? Did they find happiness? I hope so. Vee crossed my mind too, leaving a warm feeling in my heart.

Throwing a glance at the concrete, I felt cold sweat on my forehead.

I'm sorry, Venus

-Mikey

TO EXPLAIN MYSELF - I wanted to keep the final scene from the manga, when Bonten Mikey is with Takemichi. It's not to destroy the good mood at all, but I do think Mikey is someone who's extremely tortured in his life (as everyone knows lmao) so in this case, where him and you were an item and he had strong feelings toward you, obviously it will destroy him more. Hopefully it's not a triggering subject for you, if it is, I'm sorry bby 😔

see now mod… *exhales*

Yeah, I don’t know about this, Dee.

We stood outside the bar, which from the outside, looked pack to capacity already. Apprehension consumed me. Darren noticed, taking my hand into his and squeezing it.

Do you wanna go home? he asked gently. We don’t have to go in if you don’t want to.

I shook my head. If I couldn’t do this, with my best friend no less, I probably wouldn’t be able to do any social event.

No, I’m fine. But we are leaving before 11.

He winked at me.

Fuck yeah we are.

We walked in together at that, arm in arm. Eyes flitted to us and then away when they realized we weren’t anybody of importance. A few lingered on me, recognizing me from the news maybe. I ignored them, allowing Darren to introduce me to his friends. He was right, they were nice. We shared a few drinks, me only having one beer to the others four. After Natalie, I just didn’t trust drinking anymore. Or people in general, always looking outside of people’s actions for their hidden motives.

We left at ten as promised. I shoved Darren and a couple of his friends into separate Ubers since they were way too drunk for me to even trust them driving. After I managed to get transportation for the final drunkard that I was with that night, I started walking toward my own car. But I noticed something. Somebody was following me. Clutching onto the pocketknife I started carrying ever since I got back home, I steeled myself with the thought of pulling it out and taking a life if needed be.

As the person neared, my grip on the hilt was knuckle-white and tight, with little to no chance of slipping off. When they touched me, I spun around fast, placing the knife right beneath their throat. I was smart enough to avoid streetlights.

Who the fuck are you? I snarled, pressing the knife closer with each word I spoke.

The man threw up his hands quickly, but made no move to disarm me. I’m with Dante of La Casa Nostra.

Who?

Me, somebody spoke from our left. I chanced a look and found a man sitting in the back of a heavily tinted jeep. My heart sunk. I learned a long time ago that tinted jeeps were the poster cars for criminal organization and gang leaders to move around in. My name is Dante, Venus, and I came to you requesting help.

Funny way of asking for it, I bit, throwing a look to the man who was following me. And besides, I don’t think I can help you.

It’s about Mikey.

I froze, unsure how to answer for a few seconds, then eventually came up with a, I don’t know a Mikey.

We were there with the Yamaguchis, Venus. La Casa Nostra was a big help in aiding Bonten in that victory. Our sniper was the one that saved your life. So technically, you owe me.

Could I even argue that? I had a feeling that even if I wanted to, there was only stalling I could do before he lost his patience and just forced me to do what he wanted. Powerful men weren’t used to being challenged, after all. Slowly, I placed my knife in my pocket, but always kept it ready to grab in case I had to run. I walked up to the Jeep and hopped in beside Dante, keeping my distance at the same time.

What do you want?

I wanted to get straight to the point, go home if possible.

It’s Mikey, he sighed, pinching his nose as if even the thought of the man pained him to talk about. He’s… not doing so well. Not sleeping, barely eating, wasting away.

Have you ever stopped to consider he was always like that?

It honestly sounded like he was behaving just as he was—

But that was before you met him, Venus.

I clenched my jaw, remembering how he had started eating and sleeping at my request, soon not even needing me to tell him to do either at all. A certain beach date flashed into my mind and I shook my head to rid myself of the memory. Dante observed my reaction, and I wanted to pinch myself for giving an observable one.

Either way, I’m worried, Venus. Mikey is a good guy, an extraordinary ally, but with the way things are looking…I don’t think he’s going to survive much longer to be any of both. Which is why I offered to take you to him as a last resort.

Without my consent?

With or without, he admitted with a laugh. I’m that desperate. He’s not well, Venus. Even my children are concerned.

I gnawed on my thumbnail.

Bringing me to him might not fix him. They might make things worse. For both of us, I wanted to say.

Or they might make them better, he argued.

You couldn’t possibly know that.

I’m willing to take that risk.

I couldn’t answer that. Few things could talk down a stubborn man. I wasn’t one of them.

You know, I really think you and Manjiro belong together. You’re both just too stubborn to see that.

I didn’t reply to that, either. I would’ve agreed once. Manjiro made sure I couldn’t.

We arrived to the building and I was astounded by how distinctly I remembered it despite being away from it from so long. My mind went on that nurse who helped me escape. I wondered if they fired her.

Dante hopped out of the car the same time I did, using a fancy keycard to gain access into the building. Walking through it, I realized I never took the time to appreciate how large the space was. We reached the room where Dante said he’d be— the meeting room.

Mikey, I’m here as promised, Dante announced and I held my breath. I hadn’t the slightest clue what to say when I saw him, or whether what I’d say would be the right thing. Probably not, considering I wanted to curse him like a dog.

I still had time to think of something though. When Dante opened the door, nobody was there.

Am I being pranked? I asked Dante whose eyebrows were furrowed.

That’s strange. He hasn’t checked out of the building at all today so he’s still in here.

I looked around for a bit, feeling something amiss, and then I found the window looking out over the city. Dante, is there any room in this place that has a better view than this one?

No, this is the highest floor in the building. No view comes close. Why do you ask?

They all had something in common. This room, Mikey’s house’s design, the hotels he booked, down to the dates he scheduled— there was one common denominator.

The view. I snapped my fingers. Mikey likes the views!

But there’s no better view than… the roof. He’s on the roof.

I wasted no time, bolting out of the door. The elevator stopped just to the meeting room floor. Only stairs could take you up to the roof. I sprinted up them by God’s grace, barely even winded by the time I opened the door.

Good thing too, because the sight of Mikey took my breath away. It was only his back, the same black hair I had seen him in the last time fluttering in the wind. What worried me most was not where he was standing, feet firmly planted on the ledge. What worried me most was how relaxed he was on the ledge, as if he wasn’t staring a certain death right in the face. A strong enough wind would send him right to it. I couldn’t witness that. My feet moved on their own, fueled by adrenaline. I had barely reached him when he started to push himself over the ledge, but I caught him in time, gripping my shirt between his fingers and snatching him back with all my might. He fell back easily, too startled by the fact somebody was there to catch him to brace himself. He landed right atop of me in a heap of limbs. My hands were trembling. It was as if I had just realized how close I was to missing that chance to grab him. Tears came into my eyes, but I didn’t know if they were from anger or from fear.

You idiot, I whispered harshly through sobs. You fucking idiot.

#tw suicide attempt #🗝; citizen #🗝; mikey #🗝; chronicles of vee: vol. 1 #now mod let me tell you how long i pondered this response #i sat and reflected okay.#in shock.#angst clearly is ur thing bc.#wow

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breitzbachbea · 3 years

Note

4. Share a sentence or paragraph from your writing that you’re really proud of (explain why, if you like), 6. What character do you have the most fun writing? 10. How would you describe your writing process? 16. Tried anything new with your writing lately? (style, POV, genre, fandom?) -> I'm beging nosy and asking FOUR questions 👀😂

Oh Amber, PLEASE be nosy. I love answering questions about my writing or characters, even though I take 5000 years to answer.

Fun meta asks for writers

4. Share a sentence or paragraph from your writing that you’re really proud of (explain why, if you like)

Okay, I thought about this for a while and I think I have a few more I could also share (and I'd probably have a sizeable amount of scenes or sentences if I reread ALL I wrote). But this scene was the thing that came to mind first and stuck the most.

From Italian Affairs, Chapter 9 "Drained Chances", Scene 3:

“I know I have to make up for what a jerk I’ve been”, he said. “But I still wish I could just forget.” He looked back into the room and spotted the wine bottle on a sideboard. “Charlie, you’ve got to face this”, Harry said and Michele sighed: “Okay we’ve got to think sober about this situation. Well, you do, Charlie.” “Damn right”, he muttered before walking over to the sideboard, almost falling over when he came to a hold with his hands on its upper side: "I have to correct my mistakes tomorrow!" “That’s the spirit!”, Harry said and Michele smiled. “You most certainly have the right ideas even now, Charlie.” “I have fucked up but I am a grown man and like that I will take responsibility for my actions!” He had grabbed the bottle even before the other two could yell “No!” and they only watched in horror as he emptied it. Charlie held down a burp, put the bottle back on the table and smile confident: "I have to talk to him again and explain myself." “And there it goes down the drain, the last piece of his common sense”, Harry hissed. “Thanks for lending me your ear, guys”, Charlie said and took a wobbly step away from the sideboard. “I am going back to my room now, enjoy your night.” He walked towards the door: “Or maybe I could try to talk to Marco again – no, that’s a stupid idea.” “You just drank half a bottle of wine in one go, mate, you are not going anywhere”, Harry said and Michele sighed but Charlie waved his hand while he staggered towards the door. “Don’t let me cockblock you, Happy fucking.” And with that he tripped and fell to his knees. He frowned at the floor while Michele got up to help him. “You know, Michele”, Charlie said while the Sicilian pulled him on his legs. “On second thought it might have been six beer.”

'Don't let me cockblock you, happy fucking', followed immediately by Charlie tripping and nearly falling on his face is deadass THE funniest thing I have ever written. I love how hilarious the entire situation is, solely because Charlie is an impulsive son of a bitch who keeps making bad decisions. Whenever he seems on track, he just cannot shut his mouth, he just cannot control a whim for a moment too long and it bites him in the ass the very next second. I love him so much. Furthermore, the scene itself is a perfect blend of wit and slapstick. I've outdone myself here.

Also, fuck you, ao3 says I have 382 170 words uploaded right now and that is still far from all I've ever written. So you're getting another scene.

From Smudged Makeup & Cleaning Up:

“I hate myself,” she said in French. “I hate myself and I hate him, I hate both of them so much,” she sobbed as her breath hitched and tears began to run down her face again. “Don’t cry again, shhht, don’t do that,” Hugo whispered and began to rock from side to side. “It’s okay, it’s nothing to cry about.” “I wouldn’t have to see it if I had just opened my stupid mouth and had told him how I felt, if I had just told him these stupid three words I now wouldn’t have to see this.” Her voice was something between a whisper and a hiss.

There are at least two more little paragraphs I could have shared from that one-shot, so I decided to go with the most emotional part. I reread it last night and I still think it is a pretty damn good piece of writing. It's funny, interesting and it shows all of the characters (Timothea, Hugo, Arielle) and their relationships to one another marvellously. I'd sincerely reccommend it to everyone, although the (not as good for sure) A French Trio Of Bad Decisions may be required reading to understand who Arielle is talking about in the above excerpt. (Amber, since you already read that one though, you can just go and enjoy Smudged Makeup & Cleaning Up as your first taste of Thea before you delve into The Amulet for more <3)

6. What character do you have the most fun writing?

That's a good question! I was going to go through Irish Problems and Italian Affairs again, tallying up who has how many POV Scenes, but gave up rather quickly; it's just very hard to determine with all the headhopping that happens in the beginning. Last time I checked it was Harry. The following list is by no means exhaustive and talks mainly about the characters as POV characters. I very much enjoy writing all of my children, whether they're the POV character or not in any given scene.

Charlie is definitely one of them, I feel very at home in his head and he's so much fun to write. His catastrophizing, his intense but jumpy emotions, his impulsivity and kindness, his dialogue and thoughts ... He is so much fun. I'd have to lie to say this gay adhd mess doesn't hold a special place in my heart.

Francesco is another good one, solely because I love being in his head. It's a nightmare in there at times, but that's what makes it fun. Let the sadism fight the catholic guilt, the lust for pleasure at all cost the need for kindness. He's a very vibrant character with an undeniable presence in each scene he is in and it's always fun to write interesting characters.

Lovino's also always a blast. His ranting, his annoyance, his fidgeting (oh, god, if someone asks me for a favourite scene again, I am sharing the one where he shuffled around too much during a car ride and ended up folded like a lawn chair in the footwell). The tumultous inside of his head, his doubts, his fears. I have nothing but love for him and I already miss him, despite not technically having finished Italian Affairs. The rewrite is still ahead of me and I am going to savour every single moment I get to write my favourite South Italian.

Last but not least a shoutout to Hugo. I think he is very interesting as well, with the masks he wears and the intensity that lies beneath them. He's both a sweet young man AND a fuckboy AND a little bitch. The only problem with Hugo is that I'm never 100% sure in his characterisation and have to consult Jonah, his creator, in those cases.

10. How would you describe your writing process?

Messy as shit for being this organized - or Surprisingly organized for being messy as shit. I've developed this process over the past eight years and I'll probably keep tweaking screws as time goes on.

This is my process for my big, multi-chapter, novellength main series entries. Anything else usually gets done in a similiar fashion, just with some of the steps lacking. (I didn't vomitdraft for rarepairweek, for example, nor did I do the proofreading on paper because deadline.)

1. I make an outline. I used to call this "Scene Plan", because it is just that - a list of each scene, with a very short description that makes no sense to anyone but me. Seriously, YOU tell me what is going on here:

2. I collect all snippets that come to mind for a series in a document; if I already have an outline, I copy whatever scene they would belong to as a header. Those things happen all the time, it isn't a conscious effort.

3. I take those snippets, paste them into Quollwriter and then vomitdraft for a few days. Each day around 500 words, as fast as possible. Whatever comes to mind goes onto the page, rarely backtracking. It's not about it being presentable, it's about having something written that serves as skeleton for the scene. I research jack shit at this point and directly type (Look this shit up) into the text.

4. Once a scene/chapter is done, I copy it into word and read through it to take notes in a little notebook. I write down what to research, what I like in the draft, what I dislike and what I still ponder. I try to draw the first connections to give the chapter a coherent feeling. (Chapters for the main series consist of three scenes, so I take notes for a scene and edit it before I repeat the process for the next - I don't take comments for three scenes in a row.)

5. I begin to edit the scene with a goal of 200 words a day. I usually exceed it; during a very bad day I fall a little short of it. I try to write every day or every two days, unless something else requires my focus more (like a term paper). Oftentimes I start a writing session with tweaking what I did the day before, before I continue. I usually also do the research as it is called for at this stage - The Amulet was the only time I did research before I even begun to write. My usual timer is 30 Minutes, but I tend to write for a little longer if I am in the flow. Or I sit there for 4 hours to finish a scene because I am THAT much in the flow and I want the GODFORSAKEN THING DONE.

6. Once I finished editing the chapter or one-shot, I print it out and go through it with a red gel pen. I correct typos, formatting errors or formatting choices I don't agree with. I rewrite sentences that I think read clumsily and cross out words that repeat too much. I sometimes add things to moments that are lacking or I cross out sentences that now feel unnecessary. Once finished, I apply the corrections to my document.

7. If I have a beta-reader (like the lovely @swabianmapley for Herz Auf Beat), this is the point at which I send them the document and wait for their feedback & corrections.

8. I post the thing onto the black void that is The Internet, lie to myself that I don't care about feedback & yet still keep checking ao3 for new hits/kudos/bookmarks/comments and begin the same process for my next project a few days later.

16. Tried anything new with your writing lately? (style, POV, genre, fandom?)

Hmm. I don't know if it counts, but in the coffee one-shots for rarepairweek I tried to make peace with the 'holes' I left. To not explain everything, but let the reader draw their own conclusion. Aside from that ... Been trying to put more emotion into my writing. I felt so unsatisfied with the big Charco kiss at the end of Italian Affairs that I'm now making an effort into describing emotions and sensations more, especially internally and not simply physically.

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aphroditeurl · 6 years

Note

If I'm doing all the asks then so are you.

>.> fineeee

1. If you didn’t have to sleep, what would you do with the extra time?

Play video games, I’m not gonna lie about that.

2. What’s your favourite piece of clothing you own/owned?

I have a black dress I bought for myself a couple years ago that makes me look like a badass Bond villain. And I look sexy as all hell in it.

3. What hobby would you get into if time and money weren’t an issue?

I want to make custom dolls idk

4. What would your perfect room look like?

PINK i’m a fucking girly girl

5. How often do you play sports?

Never...I am not into sports. Watching others though is fun

6. What fictional place would you most like to go?

Diagon Alley

7. What job would you be terrible at?

Anything involving math. So I would make an awful accountant.

8. If you could turn any activity into an Olympic sport, what would you have a good chance at winning medal for?

Being sick apparently...nah I’m pretty good at graphic design I think

9. When was the last time you climbed a tree?

I am afraid of heights so never

10. What is the most annoying habit other people have?

loud chewing, I will want to murder you I Promise

11. What job do you think you’d be good at?

Anything with animals, I have a passion for them

12. What skill would you like to master?

A different language. Being bi-lingual would be cool. I hate English.

13. What would be the most amazing adventure to go on?

Oh fuck I want to travel. Even to places considered “dangerous”. I want to go everywhere, I have A NEED. I’m a sucker for those exploration videos on youtube.

14. If you had unlimited funds to build a house that you would live in for the rest of your life, what would the finished house look like?

Firstly it would be a beach house because I love water and beaches. Secondly, it’d have at least four bedrooms, maybe six. And a full sized basement. I want it to look Magical As Fuck. For reasons. There will be an aquarium in it.

15. What’s your favourite drink?

Coke. The drink.

16. What state or country do you never want to go back to?

I miss Michigan a lot. I loved it there.

17. What songs have you completely memorized?

A lot?? too vague

18. What game or movie universe would you most like to live in?

STARDEW VALLEY. Sustainable farming is sexy.

19. What do you consider to be your best friend?

@sedris-the-meme-king

20. Are you usually early or late?

Early. Like twenty minutes early. Anxiety fuels me.

21. What pets did you have while you were growing up?

A lot of cats, a few dogs, hamsters, and a couple bunnies. I love animals.

22. When people come to you for help, what do they usually want help with?

Relationship advice

23. What takes up too much of your time?

Depression

24. What do you wish you knew more about?

Space law. Which is weird. The concept of space really scares me but it’s also a little fascinating.

25. What would be your first question after waking up from being cryogenically frozen for 100 years?

“is my cat ok?”

26. What are some small things that make your day better?

Getting random texts from ppl.

27. Who’s your go to band or artist when you cannot decide on something to listen to?

Rihanna or Halsey

28. What’s the best way to start the day?

By sleeping in a little longer

29. What shows are you into?

Anything that’s paranormal, pretty much anything on TLC, Gordon Ramsey is Good

30. Who has impressed you most with what they’ve accomplished?

@floating-in-the-dark for being a good bean

31. What age do you wish you could permanently be?

18. That was a fun age dude.

32. What TV show or movie do you refuse to watch?

13 Reasons Why, Game of Thrones, I’m petty

33. What would be your ideal way to spent the weekend?

Video games, ice cream, kissing, things of that nature, maybe going to the movies, exploring a haunted abandoned hospital, casual things you know

34. What is something that is considered a luxury, but you don’t think you could live without?

My phone

35. What’s your claim to fame?

Idk what this means???

36. What’s something you like to do the old-fashioned way?

Dating. I’m sort of a cliche geek ok.

37. What’s your favourite genre of book or movie?

Horror for movie and fantasy for books

38. What have you only recently formed an opinion about?

God phoning. Non-pagans won’t get this.

39. What’s the best single day on the calendar?

The first of every month because it feels sorta refreshing

40. What are you interested in that most people haven’t heard of?

Sexual education

that’s a joke but I am also serious

41. How do you relax after a hard day of work?

I watch youtube videos and play some games, or RP

42. What was the best book or series that you’ve ever read?

The Maze Runner. Sorta corny but it was enjoyable.

43. What’s the farthest you’ve ever been from home?

California. 10/10 would go back.

44. What is the most heartwarming thing you’ve ever seen?

“I would blink” out of context this makes no sense but it meant a lot to me in context

45. What is the most annoying question people ask you?

“Are you SURE you’re __ age?” I am small, I sound 12, but yes I promise I AM TWENTY

46. What could you give a 30-minute presentation on with absolutely no preparation?

Harry Potter at any given moment. Esp Draco Malfoy.

47. What is something you think everyone should do at least once in their lives?

Tbh??? Move away to a completely new place that you have no connections in. That sounds crazy stupid but really, it was the best choice I ever made.

48. Would you rather go hang gliding or whitewater rafting?

Whitewater rafting

49. What’s your dream car?

1967 Thunderbird bitches

50. What’s worth spending more on to get the best?

Make-up, and bath stuff

51. What is something that a ton of people are obsessed with but you just don’t get the point of?

Game of Thrones lmao

52. What are you most looking forward to in the next 10 years?

School. I can’t wait to start college in the fall.

53. Where is the most interesting place you’ve been?

UP Michigan

54. What’s something you’ve been meaning to try but just haven’t gotten around to it?

There are lot of ways to answer this.

I want to try a ghost pepper lmao

55. What’s the best thing that happened to you last week?

I started talking to someone really sweet

56. What piece of entertainment do you wish you could erase from your mind so that you could experience for the first time again?

Undertale tbh

57. If all jobs had the same pay and hours, what job would you like to have?

I’d work at a graveyard no joke

58. What amazing thing did you do that no one was around to see?

Absolutely nothing my dudes

59. How different was your life one year ago?

Extremely different and I sorta miss it

60. What quirks do you have?

I wiggle my mouth from side to side when I am in thought, I tend to rub my nose randomly, I walk on the balls of my feet

61. What would you rate 10/10?

@funkypanda

62. What fad or trend do you hope comes back?

I!! Want!! 90s!! Fashion!! Back!!

63. What’s the most interesting piece of art you’ve seen?

anything @floating-in-the-dark has done

64. What kind of art do you enjoy most?

See above answer

65. What do you hope never changes?

Most of my friendships

66. What city would you most like to live in?

Londonnnnn

67. What movie title best describes your life?

The Boss Baby

68. What did you decide to do the work you are doing now?

Huh????

69. What’s the best way a person can spend their time?

Being kind to others

70. If you suddenly became a master at woodworking, what would you make?

Some really weird shit dude

71. Where is the most relaxing place you’ve ever been?

UP Michigan lol

72. What is the luckiest thing that has happened to you?

Meeting my best friend

73. Where would you rather be from?

Canada

74. What are some things you’ve had to unlearn?

My temper, some bad habits that were formed from anxiety

75. What are you looking forward to in the coming months?

School, getting a puppy, summer

76. What website do you usually go on when you have time off?

Tumblrr

77. Where would you spend all your time if you could?

Japannnnn or South Korea

78. What is special about the place you grew up?

Everyone was a community. We all supported each other.

79. What age do you want to live to?

100+ cause I fear death a lot

80. What are you most likely to become famous for?

The Biggest Baby Award

81. What are you absolutely determined to do?

Finish school and become a zoologist cause that’s the dream

82. What is the most impressive thing you know how to do?

I can code and shit????? idk

83. What do you wish you knew more about?

Space law

84. What question would you most like to know the answer to?

“will I ever be successful at anything”

#THIS TOOK ME A LONG ASS TIME SO YOU BETTER READ ALL OF THE ANSWERS #funkypanda

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sitabethel · 7 years

Note

Any chance you could post some random fluffsmut headcanons for trashshipping today? I kind of ran into some jarring stuff I'm gonna have to deal with later. -aspidisecalis being a nerd at the bakery again

Oooooooo~ I think It’s time to do a teaser for One Man’s Trash (the Trashshipping fic I’ve been working on here and there. I have 14 finished chapters so far). This is the end of Chapter 8, the “first kiss” scene.

Context: Kek and Bakura are trying to live like “normal people.” They finally get their own apartment, but they’re broke af, so they don’t have much. There are some OC mentions:

Tomoko: She’s the landlady at the hostel they stayed at before they could move out on their own. She’s pretty much an adopted mother to Kek.

Granny: She’s a grumpy old woman that owns the noodle shop in which Bakura works. She walks around all day drinking booze and coffee, so Bakura gets along with her pretty well, actually.

It was frightening, how he felt, but Bakura caught his reflection in a store window on the walk home and stopped to really stare at himself.

He saw a little of the thief he once was, mostly in the set of his jaw and the way his eyes narrowed in automatic suspicion at everything in the world, but otherwise… he looked like he belonged in Japan, Ryou’s long lost cousin. He had Ryou’s delicate cheekbones and eyes, his narrow nose and thinner lips. It was like he’d been reincarnated, and Bakura supposed he had been. He fought the Pharaoh in video games now, and snuggled on the couch with an orphan who’d been adopted by a hostel’s landlady and a tanuki who possessed a couch. It wasn’t weirder than anything else that’d ever happened to him.

Bakura snorted, smirked at his own reflection, and walked home, wanting to see Kek. He struggled for a second to get the key to turn in the worn out lock, but then he opened the door and stepped inside.

“Hey, Kek, I was wondering if you wanted- holy shit.” Bakura started laughing.

Bubbles covered the kitchen floor. In some areas, the suds rose almost half a meter tall. The mess soaked into the edge of the living room carpet.

“Just- shut- the- fuck- up!” Kek shouted through sobs. He knelt amidst the foam with a towel in each hand and tears running down his cheeks.

“Oi, oi.” Bakura shut the door, slipped off his shoes and socks, and tiptoed to the kitchen. “It’s not that big of a deal.”

“I can’t do this!” Kek wailed. “How am I supposed to be a human being when I can’t even run a dishwasher!” He rubbed his eyes against his bicep. “What did I do wrong? I don’t understand how I fucked up something so easy.”

“Did you use a tab?” Bakura asked as he crouched beside Kek.

“Tab? I used dish soap?”

“The liquid kind?”

“There’s more than one kind?” Kek’s face wrinkled, still shouting. “How was I supposed to know that?”

“You weren’t.” Bakura wrapped his arms around Kek and held him. “Tomoko didn’t have a dishwasher. How could you know? I only know because of Ryou.”

“Stupid Marik,” Kek hissed between clenched teeth. “If he was normal- I wouldn’t be so fucked up!”

“You wouldn’t exist.” Bakura used his thumb to tilt Kek’s face up. He smiled when Kek looked at him and traced Kek’s cheek. “And hey, I kinda enjoy the fact that you exist. This humanity thing would be underrated if I couldn’t watch you stumble through it with me.”

Tears welled up in Kek’s eyes, and Bakura hated seeing tears in his eyes.

“It’s just soap and water.”

“I fucked up all the towels.”

“I’ll go get some more.”

But Bakura didn’t stand up. Instead, he dropped down to his knees, allowing the bubbles and water to soak through his jeans, and leaned in to kiss Kek. They both closed their eyes as their lips moved tentatively against each other. When Bakura pulled away; Kek gasped.

“I’m going out to get towels-”

“We can’t afford-”

Bakura kissed him again and realized it was a great way to shut an Ishtar up. He should have kissed Kek back in Battle City. He’d take that over getting roasted by a god any time.

“Don’t worry about it.” Bakura shook his head. “Towels are cheap, and I’ve been stingy so I could get your present- which I’m also getting, so throw those towels in the wash, and I’ll be back in half an hour.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t know about the tabs.”

“It’s not your fault.” Bakura combed Kek’s hair with his fingers, and then got up and left before Kek could apologize again.

He went to the thrift store with soap-soaked pants. He grabbed the entire stack of towels, and the manager noticed Bakura carrying an armload of towels with wet pants and a sheepish look on his face, and she gave him a discount for buying the entire batch. After the thrift shop, Bakura counted up his money. He’d been trying to manage to save enough to get Kek a nice, red leather jacket that he’d seen, but the dishes, the eggs and rice, the extra towels… Bakura still had enough for something, but not a leather jacket. He sighed and started walking towards the house, glancing at the shops and wondering what the fuck he was going to do.

Then he saw the pet shop and had a brilliant idea. Bakura bought a fishbowl, dark purple gravel, dechlorinator, and two cheap fake plants. Then he went over to the betas and picked the brightest, most blood-red one he could find. His shopping bags in one hand, and a plastic container in the other, Bakura rushed back to the apartment with a huge grin on his face.

“I’m back!” He shouted into the apartment.

“Did you get the towels?” Kek asked, standing over the rice cooker with bubbles all around his feet. The apartment carried the warm scent of cooked rice as Kek used a regular spoon to stir it because they didn’t own a rice paddle yet.

“I got something better than towels.” Bakura held out the fish.

“Idiot.” Kek rubbed at his eyes, but didn’t cry again. “You shouldn’t have bothered.”

“I wanted to.” Bakura set everything down on their table.

Kek walked up behind him and, despite the wet floor, Kek picked Bakura up, turned him around, and set him on top of the table beside the fish. Bakura opened his mouth to complain, but Kek’s tongue slipped inside and he moaned instead.

“Thank you,” Kek whispered against Bakura’s lips. “You taught me how to say that, you know.”

“It’s just a bad habit I picked up from my old host.” Bakura chuckled at himself because the statement was true.

“H-how do I…” Kek pushed away from Bakura and went towards the fish.

“Put the gravel in the bowl. Add the plants. Fill with water. Then follow the directions for those drops.”

“It says it has to sit to work in the water.”

“Then let it sit. He’ll be fine in the cup until then.” Bakura stretched and groaned. He grabbed the towels and they used them to mop up the floor and then Bakura stripped and stuck in clothes and the towels in the washer.

“Should have saved one for yourself,” Kek said.

“Shit,” Bakura cursed. He sighed, shoulders slumping. “Whatever. I’m still taking a shower and drawing a bath to soak in afterward.” He glanced at Kek. “Want to join me in the bath?”

“W-wh-what?” Kek giggled, his face going flush even through his complexion.

“It’s common in Japan. You rinse off in the shower and then relax in the tub.”

“With other people?” Kek asked, narrowing his eyes.

“Yes.” Bakura snorted and walked towards the bathroom. “Look, I don’t care either way, just thought I’d offer.”

“I didn’t say no!” Kek followed.

“Give me a second to shower first.” Bakura laughed.

“You’re already naked. What’s the point of me waiting now?”

“Whatever.” Bakura stepped into the shower.

He washed his hair, soaped up, and rinsed everything as quickly as possible. He heard the bath running as he rinsed. Bakura didn’t have a towel, so he had to wring out his hair the best he could and shake dry before stepping out of the shower cubicle.

“Thought you’d want to go straight to the tub,” Kek said.

“Thanks.” Bakura dipped his body into the huge bathtub. “Fuck. This is nice.”

“I’ll hop into the shower now.” Kek disappeared behind Bakura.

Bakura kept his eyes closed and relaxed. He heard the water turn on, then a few minutes later off, but didn’t bother opening his eyes until he felt Kek’s bodyweight displace the water in the tub.

“It’s nice, right?”

“Sure is.” Kek sighed.

“After today, we both deserve a bath.” Bakura stared at the ceiling. Water stains bloomed like yellow carnations

“I made rice.”

“Sounds freaking delicious.”

“We still don’t have towels.”

“I’ll use a shirt.”

Kek laughed. Bakura grinned and shifted so that he could look at Kek instead of the ceiling. “I’m serious. It won’t work as well, but fuck it? Better than dripping over the rest of the carpet.”

“You’re the same as always.” Kek rose out of the water.

“How do you mean?” Bakura averted his eyes, although he really wanted to stare at the way the water gleamed off of Kek’s body.

“Even when things don’t go according to plan, you just roll with it.”

“Ha, yeah. I had to learn that skill pretty early on. It’s the only way I survived.”

“Pffft, I’ll get some shirts then.”

Kek went away and returned with two of their more worn t-shirts. They did a piss-poor job drying, but Bakura made do and put on dry clothes. He used the wet shirt to wrap up his hair, adding a hair dryer to his mental list of shit they needed to buy.

“I’ll serve the rice.” Kek walked onto the now dry kitchen floor and grabbed their only two bowls out of the dishwasher. “There’s still bubbles in here.”

“Just rinse them off. I think we may actually have a dish towel left.”

“Fuck. I forgot dishtowels even exist.” Kek pulled the drawer and took one of the smaller towels out.

“I’m going to put the laundry in the dryer.”

Bakura shook his head even as he moved over to the washer. More and more he was adapting to regular life, but it was still odd to think about putting towels in the dryer. Not only was it the sort of thing he used to make Ryou deal with, but there hadn’t been dryers in Egypt thousands of years ago. Bakura would just wash his clothes in the river and nap naked in the sun until they were dry.

“Here’s dinner.” Kek set the bowls on the table.

He took the little cup and popped off the plastic lid, dumping the water into the bowl. The beta swirled like a quick flame before righting himself and breaking the surface for a breath.

“They breath air from the top.” Bakura pointed. “And they blow nests out of bubbles.”

“How do you know?”

“Granny rambles about them all the time.” Bakura started digging into his food. “It’s good.”

“Fucking liar. We don’t even have salt.”

Bakura laughed. “You’re right. I was lying. It’s not bad.”

“Makes it real, right?”

“Yes.” Bakura winked. “The Shadow Realm knows I love steak. It’d never try to tempt me with plain rice. This moment is utterly real.”

#One Man's Trash #Trashshipping #Yami Bakura x Yami Marik #it's more fluff and less smut but this story is the closest thing to slow burn I'll ever write

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