#I fucking tried today

[look-at-the-stars-tonight]

I ran this morning AND wrote some AND made art and I’m so proud of me

#didn’t get any of my actual office work done oopsies #but in my defense it’s a Friday and also I did allot time for it I just ended up not doing it #anyways still proud of me!!! guys art is so so important and I know that and I preach that but I haven’t been doing it #and I just picked up a blank sheet of paper and did it #and is it good or anatomically correct? no but it was so FUN #and I’ve been working thought Tim Clare’s writing stuff and it’s been GOOD #I like this new series of exercises a lot better than the couch to 80k #they’re. the same honestly and I don’t actually care about his commentary all that much #maybe I’m just more present or more invested in them #I only ran for 15. min and then I had to call my brother to pick me up because the heat was gonna make me pass out :/ #but also I TRIED #I fucking tried today #also did u know running is utterly miserable. #runners high is def a thing #felt amazing afterward #but holy shit it’s awful in the moment #my roommate ran a 25k recently and I talked to her about it and she said it never gets better #which is. not very encouraging #but also I Want To run as much of this 5k as I can #maybe I’ll be dead after but it’s fine I have a couple days to recuperate before the eclipse #WHICH IM ALSO EXCITED SBOIT. I’ve never seen a total eclipse before #goddamit my brain jumped to too many places #delete later #anyways. if u didn’t u should acknowledge ur accomplishments today #even if they didn’t feel like much #now I’m gonna go read a 115k fanfic that’s gonna wreck me #that’s my treat to me #I HAVE ACTUAL BOOKS TO FINISH. but NO. THIS is how I’m spending my time. and it’s fine I’m valid #I’ve been talking to all the lesbians about running too #and they’ve been so encouraging too!! I love my coworkers and very distantly related coworkers sm

[andthebeanstalk]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

#hlep #original #mental health #my sympathies and empathies to anyone who has to rely on this kind of hlep to get what they need. #the people in my life who most need to see this post are my family but even if they did I sincerely doubt they would internalize it #i've tried to break thru to them so many times it makes my head hurt. so i am focusing on boundaries and on finding other forms of support #and this thing i learned today helps me validate those boundaries. the example with the milk was from my therapist. #the example with the towing company was a real thing that happened with my parents a few months ago while I was age 28. 28! #a full adult age! it is so infantilizing as a disabled adult to seek assistance and support from ableist parents. #they were real mad i was mad tho. and the spoons i spent trying to explain it were only the latest in a long line of #huge family-related spoon expenditures. distance and the ability to enforce boundaries helps. haven't talked to sisters for literally the #longest period of my whole life. people really believe that if they love you and try to help you they can do no wrong. #and those people are NOT great allies to the chronically sick folks in their lives. #you can adore someone and still fuck up and hurt them so bad. will your pride refuse to accept what you've done and lash out instead? #or will you have courage and be kind? will you learn and grow? all of us have prejudices and practices we are not yet aware of. #no one is pure. but will you be kind? will you be a good friend? will you grow? i hope i grow. i hope i always make the choice to grow. #i hope with every year i age i get better and better at making people feel the opposite of how my family's ableism has made me feel #i will see them seen and hear them heard and smile at their smiles. make them feel smart and held and strong. #just like i do now but even better! i am always learning better ways to be kind so i don't see why i would stop

[fuckyeah-bears]

I woke up to find a squirrel in my apartment this morning

#They’d been in the floor for a few days #I could hear them scratching #And then today one of those little fuckers actually broke in #Can’t wait for my landlord to get here #I tried to catch the squirrel so I could bring him outside so he wouldn’t be poisoned #But he ran back down whatever hole he chewed through by the time I found a box #So now it’s just a waiting game #Also my dog is going fucking nuts #She won’t shut the fuck up #Ugh

[quibblegoobe]

bahhh the suckers wip

#ferris quiddlegoose brain thoughts #jrwi #jrwi the suckening #wip #dont ask me whats going on with emizels pants i dont fucking know #i wanted to finish this today but this alone tOOK ME 8 WHOLE HOURS. #I STARTED THIS AT 5 PM. ITS NOW 1 AM. #i told myself i would go to bed before midnight. yet here we are #i know shilo and emizel are supposed to look similar. and i tried. but i wanted to go crazy with shape language and design and whatever #also shilos outfit was a nightmare to figure out. arthurs too. #also sorry to any exmormons that see this . or anyone that has mormon knowledge and is also a sucker (suckening watcher/listener)

[adainesfroggieboggy]

heard the funniest story today about a guy i want to meet so bad just because he’s hilarious in my head, and i will try to do it justice. this story is about my friend and his coworker.

my friend tells me that this coworker is the kind of guy that’s tall, scrawny, and so sure of his ability to win a fight against anyone. he talked about this regularly, saying he could win a fight against literally anyone. my friend would get bored and just talk to this guy, because he was the most unintentionally funny guy he’d ever met.

my friend decides to ask him, “you say you can win a fight against anyone. what if i hired a seven foot tall, 300 pound, just pure muscle guy to fight you. would you win?”

to which the coworker replies, “oh, easy. done it. i’d win.”

“what about two?”

“light work. i’d beat them up.”

the questions continue, from three to four to five and so on.

“okay, but what about ten? you don’t even know they’re coming. they just come out of nowhere and jump you. do you think you’d win?”

“absolutely. i’d wipe the floor with ‘em.”

“okay, fine. what about eleven?”

“nah, couldn’t do eleven.”

(this is where the room dissolved into laughter and you think it’s over. that is the funniest punchline i can imagine.)

“dude, i wish i could hire ten guys to come best you up.”

“do it. i’ll beat them up and take the money.”

“what if they catch you in the bathroom and you have your pants down or something?”

“i’ll pull up my pants and beat them up.”

“you think they’re gonna wait for you to pull your pants up?”

“they better.”

#cw violence #lizas rambling again #yeah i lost my mind in the break room at a cracker barrel today #this is so fucking funny to me. and the delivery was beautiful. perfect. #yeah this is a thing i wish other people found funny irl bc i tried to retell it and it wasnt as good bc i fumbled it #i was trying to stop my teeth from fucking chattering i was so cold it was distrscting ok

[xamaxenta]

Didnt know what to do today so I took a random op character request to promote the @oppokezine with

Totally unaffiliated to the zine but Benn w his mega aerodactyl partner, an impressive combo

Preorders are open rn! You dont wanna miss the cool pokemon/onepiece content!!!!

#one piece #one piece zine #benn beckman #red haired pirates #my art #so i have never drawn this dude yall can tell but i tried lmfaoao #one piece pokemon zine #but i did enjoy drawing the aerodactyl that was fun #today on i didnt both to reference the gun #apologies benn diehard fans #i . #I FORGOT TO DRAW THE GUMS ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE JAW HOLY FUCK HAHAHAHAHAH ok whatever i wont get sad abt it i dod this in record time #laffing tho

[blindmagdalena]

Heeyy a bit of a self indulgent ask here but I had a phobia/trauma trigger today and it caused me to have a messy sobbing panic attack. Do you have anything on how Homelander would deal with his s/o having a panic attack like that? almost completely inconsolable. I know this is self serving and indulgent and I’m sorry for over sharing homelander is a comfort character for me and you write him exquisitely. If you’re not comfortable with this just ignore

Homelander was sixteen when he had his first panic attack. He'd flown further and faster away than he'd ever had the freedom to and collapsed in a dense woodland, sobbing and rocking his body against the cool forest floor.

He'd pulled his hair so hard it should have come loose, grit his teeth so tightly they should have cracked, and choked so badly on his own constricting throat that it should have caved in.

They didn't. He's invulnerable, after all. As solid as marble.

It was the first attack, but not the last.

That's how he recognizes it so quickly in you.

"Hey," he says, ears attuned to the rabbit-like pound of your heart. "Heyy, hey, it's okay. I'm right here, you see me? Hey." He's only just found you, he doesn't know yet what your trigger was, but he can ascertain that later.

Your staccato breaths and sharp sobs, the sea salt smell of tears streaking your cheeks, are nearly enough to rouse his own panic by proxy. He needs it to stop. He needs you to stop. He cares about you too much for you to scare him like this.

"Hey, you hear me?" He asks, cupping either side of your face. You can't answer through it. Your tongue is gnarled with panic and you're sobbing so hard he fears you'll choke yourself on it. He's not even sure you see him.

He takes you into his arms, one moving smoothly around your waist while the other cups the back of your head. He holds gently at first, grip gradually tightening, compressing your body against his in the hopes that the hammer of your heart will meet and match the steady beat of his own.

"Sssshhhhhhh," he shushes by your ear, lifting you just enough to keep you on your feet, but take from you the weight of your own body.

"I've got you. Whatever it is, it's okay. It's okay. I've got you. M'gonna take care of it, alright? Ssshh," he says, rocking you the same way he used to rock himself in the corner of the bad room, soothing himself with the thump of his own skull against those sterile white walls.

He knows it's working when you slip your arms around him in turn. He continues to hush you, whispering more honeyed assurances in your ear, the core sentiment always the same.

I'm here. You're safe. I love you.

It's everything he can think that he always wanted to hear in these moments of raw, horrifically human weakness.

Eventually, your breaths begin to even out, though your heart continues to thunder in his ears, still convinced that the danger hasn't yet vanished. He tries not to take that personally and scoops you up the rest of the way into his arms.

"That's it, just like that," he coos, pressing a firm kiss to your forehead. "Breathe. Breathe. Good... Light as a feather now, okay? Like you can fly," he tells you, sharing the greatest comfort he's ever known. His only real escape has always been his weightlessness, the ability to shed gravity at will. He uses his strength in an attempt to share even a sliver of that sense of freedom with you.

Maybe it works, maybe it doesn't. All he knows is that your heart starts to slow alongside the flow of your tears. He kisses your wet cheeks, the bridge of your nose, your forehead. He whispers praise and love with each one, voice barely above a whisper.

"I'm sorry," you choke out. He's appalled that would be your first instinct.

"Don't," he says firmly, though his voice is still low. "Don't. I can carry it for you. Carry you. What's the point of super strength otherwise?" He murmurs, a smile playing at the edges of his lips.

You almost smile back, and that's enough for him. He kisses the crease between your brows until it smooths, and the highs of your cheeks until the tears dry up, and your lips until they're ready to speak again.

He'll hold you for as long as it takes your body to realize the threat was only ever in your mind, and that there isn't a thing in this goddamn world he would ever let hurt you.

#i'm so sorry you experienced that today my darling ilu #i hope this helps i tried to get it out asap #he would take such good care because he knows what it's like to be fucked up by your own body #you don't ever have to apologize to me i promise #i'm all for self-indulgence and comfort #you're welcome and safe here!!! #homelander x reader #homelander x you #x reader #darling anon #ask and you shall receive #my writing

[moxley]

i made a joke post about raphael being unconcerned, unbothered, moisturised, staying in his lane, etc when haarlep fucks someone else even though he can feel every second of it

except i am thinking about it so much actually 😳

because when you're given raphael's boudoir invite, you're told it's where he conducts business and pleasure. you're explictly told to share yourself with haarlep

if you give yourself over to haarlep entirely, they say that you're going to be a loving doll for them and their master, that you're going to pleasure all the beasts in the hells

why would he be concerned about haarlep fucking anyone in his house when it is always a good outcome for him. he's creaming his pants in some devil meeting(tm) on a different plane and maybe he gets a brand new toy

good lord the man may not get fucked by anyone except haarlep but he's into an endless list of gloriously fucked up shit

#raphael bg3 #haarlep #baldur's gate 3 #😳 no sir i'm not thinking about being spitroasted at haarlep and raphaels whims for eternity #god he's such a loser he's a chewtoy he's pathetic but he's also incredibly sexy. i feel insane #also thinkin a bunch about the archivist saying 'you do know how raphael likes to play' no but i want to find out #Team Raphael Likes To Watch! #AND thinking about how haarlep says you don't have to run away if you win if you tell them you want to fuck raphael #i dunno if that's the stock response bc i haven't tried the others and i've already re-loaded my HoH saves four times today #now that's what i call meta

[zeb-z]

Tubbo as a character trying his best to be a good leader and stick to his morals and do what’s best for his team and his friends, only for who he’s leading to not listen to him, not respect him and his leadership, then push the weight of the blame onto him and call him a traitor. Hmmm where have I seen this before

#I THINK IVE SEEN THIS FILM BEFORE #AND I DIDNT LIKE THE ENDING #Christ man. mistakes or not he stuck to his morals. he strategized well. and at least he fucking tried man #c!Tubbo it’s been so long #god. God. today sucked so bad hfhsjfje #mcyt #qsmp #q!tubbo #qsmp purgatory #z speaks

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

Ok, this is mostly bc I realized we've only seen Sally being passive, but how is she able to hypothetically rip apart larger puppets limb from limb? (if the captions with Howdy hold water with other puppets)

(Slight Mutilation Warning Ahead: Puppet Edition)

they absolutely hold So Much water! it's a combination of a couple things!

a) Nightlight!Sally is really Strong. i'd liken to her to a chimp, as much as i hate them. despite being smaller than people, they're absurdly powerful. when it comes to Her, this comes from a mix of hysterical strength and something Else i've been pondering but don't want to solidify yet, so shh dont worry bout it. it's also much easier to tear fleece & cotton/stuffing than, uh, Biological materials.

b) none of the puppets are really prepared for violence? they've lived in an idyllic world where true, visceral violence likely hasn't even been a Thought in anyone's minds. like, you watch videos of people get attacked by like... raccoons or rats and they visibly Lose because they panic! they aren't prepared! they don't wanna fight! so the much smaller creature wins. They Don't Know How To Fight, Or Fight Back.

b.1) also, Nightlight!Sally is still... Sally. she's still their dear friend. i know that if a close friend attacked me, i'm not sure i'd be able to bring myself to do much other than defend/flee. i wouldn't wanna hurt them even if it meant protecting myself. hence why Wally avoids all confrontation with her & can't protect his friends from her. he can't hurt his neighbor.

b.2) there's also the shock factor. imagine you wake up from a pleasant dream to an absolute nightmare reality. Boom, automatically thrown way off your rhythm. then one of your close buddies looks Fuckin Weird, Are You Okay? and other crazy shit is happening! you're freaking out!! then your Close Friend Who's Off is suddenly slashing at you and BOOM, your arm's gone & your entire brain is scrambled from shock and fear and "?!?!?!?!?!". plus, i doubt the puppets know they're full of stuffing. seeing yourself sliced open and white fluff spilling out has gotta be just. so Unpleasant on principle.

c):

CLAWS BABEY! RIP TEAR AND SHRED! those sharp grippers are perfect for piercing and ripping! puppet fleece is Paper to her!

her fighting method is attack wildly until the threat stops making noise! it's very hard to defend oneself from it! imagine those cartoon bits where a cat attacks someone and its just a Flurry of Unbeatable Violence

#if it helps. barnaby goes back to sleepytown immediately after this #so he's safe. as safe as he can be. #i would Also like to note that to My Interpretation/Understanding the puppets can't feel actual pain #i believe this for several reasons! #but for this au specifically im gonna make that a thing for Different Reasons on top of the Main Reasons #anyway anyway #the barnaby-sally attack in my head happens Directly after he tries to help her #its already a chaotic scene but he thinks theres something wrong with her for Obvious Reasons #and runs to her to try and snap her out of her apparent daze #and then WHAM arms gone. barely gets a chance to process #meanwhile wally is hiding curled into a little ball with his hands over his ears #bc he Cant Help and he Doesnt Want To Listen #if this makes you sad! oops! sorry! i have a softer scribble queued up for later today if that makes up for it #wh lights out au #scribble salad #i am Also taking into consideration clown's post about the neighbors playing splatoon. iykyk <3 #alright its 6 am im going to sleep #meant to pass out Hours ago but that didnt happen! #ah fuck wait cant sleep yet starships just started playing. ninki minjaj...

[uhrimau]

join

#cotl #artists on tumblr #cult of the lamb #digital illustration #cotl fanart #cotl lamb #animal art #cult of the lamb fanart #furry #bRO this style is so fucking hard to do i failed like 3 times and. i think procreate was of meant for corporate bs? #but holy shit they made it hard like #i was so close to downloading illustrator on my ipad just for this fucking pic #procreate gave me so many issues #digital art #illustration #procreate #art #animal drawing #join today #i have a massive headache #i tried

[casukaga]

talking with @awholelid during the stream— this definitely happened before yasha met up with the nein in that tavern in nicodranas

🌟 Instagram | Twitter | Youtube | Ko-fi 🌟

#edit: FUCK I FORGOT JOANNE’S WINGS #oh well lmao #just say they’re folded in #// #a double post today? amazing #can’t believe i managed this during the stream #context for the tiny bandaid on top of toby’s head: yasha tried to eat him earlier #critical role #cr spoilers #a familiar problem #the mighty nein #toby #clapp #joanne #yasha nydoorin #casu art #my shtuff

[t4t-dazai]

светлую весть разнесите пошире / с вырванным сердцем, холодный, как лёд / в золоте по обречённому миру / русский христос идёт! русский христос идёт!

#bsd dostoevsky #bsd fyodor #can i tag it as fyolai #fyolai #bsd gogol #bsd #bungo stray dogs #bungou stray dogs #neo's art #bsd fanart #id in alt text #eyestrian #i think #maybe #my cat tried to skin me alive today btw /hj #(he just doesnt understand his claws fucking hurt 💔) #(the scratches also itch like crazy bc im allergic 💔) #(neo the allergy sufferer........) #господа я заебался с подписью #я редко слушаю музыку на русском и для достогоголя чет хотелось подпись на русском #так что я час искал подходящую песню #не уверен что нашел но похуй уже XD #dostogogol #dostogol #fyodor dostoyevsky bsd #nikolai gogol bsd

[starscelly]

now that you're home, i dont have to be alone.

saad yousuf, twitter / vgk@dal 5.25.23 / adrienne rich, sleepwalking next to death / miro heiskanen, instagram / amal el-mohtar, this is how you lose the time war / x / Stars' top pick Miro Heiskanen talks at NHL draft / x / "the pull of you" by the national / dallas stars, instagram / Stars' top pick Miro Heiskanen talks at NHL draft / dallas stars, twitter / ernest hemingway, the garden of eden / miro heiskanen, instagram / x / dal@sea 3.11.23 / the letters of vincent van gogh / yle tv2 promo / lighthousekeeping, jeanette winterson / dallas stars, twitter / (caption) "woof woof" by arthur

#baby's first web weave #if this even counts idk #i dont know what a web weave is. if i can be real. and im too lazy to google #i tried to source everything but i couldnt find a couple of things!!! pls lmk if u know what theyre from #a lot of the photos of them were deep in my phone so :/ #anyways #so insanely deep in my roopemiro feels today.... can u tell #please enjoy my fucking. insanity. #i want. what they have (being intrinsically connected and linked and whatever) #wearing a sign that says “please talk to me abt them” on my head #roope hintz #miro heiskanen #424 #dallas stars #cel weaving webs

[thedisablednaturalist]

Tw for weight loss mention

The whole exercise will cure your disability thing is a fucking joke. Yes exercise is beneficial for your health, but only if you aren't already on shaky foundations. You need to be on a treatment plan that WORKS before going into the maintenance phase. You wouldn't do regular maintenance on a broken item, you'd work on getting it up and running first. And maybe it would even need specialized maintenance afterwards if it's especially fragile.

I have fibromyalgia and acute degenerative disc disease. My immune system attacks my nerves and discs in my spine are slowly calcifying and causing the bones to constrict and damage my nerves (i think thats how it works). I have days where it feels like my body is on fire from nerve pain and days where it feels like my spine is about to rip from my back. And days where I have both (like today!). I get numbness in my hands and feet. I have horrible migraines. I can no longer walk unaided more than maybe 5 minutes without severe pain. I have something wrong with my knees and hips but the doctors don't know what yet.

You'd think I live an obviously seditary lifestyle correct?

Hell no.

I walk aided on average 6 miles a day over difficult terrain OUTSIDE of regular activity almost everyday. My legs are muscular and strong. I get my heart rate up and a good sweat, like all the gym rats swear on. I am often doing physical labor such as weeding, digging, sample collecting, pruning trees etc.

I'm not saying this to make other disabled people feel bad or prove that they can do anything if they just tried harder. This is an extremely painful lifestyle I've chosen that takes a lot of lifestyle management AND BOUNDARIES to keep up with the work. I also have an extremely forgiving boss who is also physically disabled and knows what I'm going through (deciding between your passion and your health and having to do so each and every day) No one should ever be expected to do what I do. I'm not even sure if I should be doing this myself.

This is to prove that exercise? Has not cured me. My muscles are strong but still hurt as if they're broken and I have to take more breaks than my coworker. I am constantly getting out of breath and I flare up regularly if I'm not careful. I am in excellent physical condition outside of my disabilities. I go to different doctors several times a month to get checked out.

I previously went through a diet program and lost a lot of weight (basically starving myself and got off my depression meds which cause weight gain but are also the only ones that work) and guess what? That didn't do shit either!!! I still felt horrible!!! I've since gained back the weight anyway after switching to focusing on adding more nutrient dense foods than taking stuff away from my diet (also muscle weighs more than fat, and fat helps cushion my aching joints and spine).

The muscle doesn't do shit for my disabilities outside of maybe some stability. Exercising everyday doesn't make the pain go away. Without my medications and aids and nutrition plans and steroid injections and spinal adjustments and physical therapy (that takes my fibro and spine into account) and alternative work methods I WOULD NOT BE ABLE TO DO WHAT I DO. Exercise alone is like trying to make a car run with no oil. Yes it'll go but it'll get more and more damaged till it can't and will need its entire engine replaced!

And yet I see new doctors and they look at me and the first thing out of their mouths is do I exercise? I should try doing a little every day :) and then i fucking blow their minds when I tell them about my job. No longer can they use that fucking cop out on me. I've been through this rodeo. Ive tried their suggestions. If you are in pain and nothing is helping? Exercise ain't going to do SHIT. You need to get to a point where you can move without severe pain first (if that's even possible). Then and only then should you consider implementing regular exercise if you can. Also weight loss talk is a red flag and a cop out. They made me lose 50+ lbs before they would look into the reasons behind my pain. Weight loss did nothing for me and exacerbated my pain.

I am living proof that all that shit is a lie and a cop out. That is the point of this post. I cannot believe people with serious medical conditions are being forced to put their bodies through extreme duress just to be believed. You are not disabled because of laziness or because you sit a lot. Plenty of people live seditary lifestyles and do not live in constant excruciating pain (they may develop disabilities later in life due to this however, and should be doing preventative exercises to maintain their health)

Please, share my story with doctors. Use me as an example. I am proof that "exercise first treat later" does not work. I should not have had to wait years to have my pain validated. I'd rather hundreds of fakers get (what? A blood test? An MRI?) than one chronically ill person get told to try yoga and go away by a doctor.

#wrenfea.exe #doctors and nurses dont fucking clown on this post #anything you say needs to be backed up by sources with apa citation thrown in for good measure #this is my personal experience dont tell me im exaggerating or just havent tried hard enough #i will kick you with my horse legs and then go lie down for 4 hours #bedbound people i am sending you so much love and will probably be joining you in a few years #chronic disability #chronic pain #spoonie #fibromyalgia #disability #chronic illness #from the field #physically disabled #this also applies to neurodivergent and mentally ill people but pls don't derail #this is mainly about physical disabilities #you are welcome to make your own post and reference mine if you want @ me and ill reblog it #sometimes im like oh i cant be disabled bc i do all this stuff im a faker inflatrating the community #and then i have days like today where i cannot leave my bed #i am so pissed off that people with long covid and ME have to go through that fucking exercise rehabilitation program #that actively makes their mitochondria worse #you wouldnt start using a vase without fixing the cracks first #the water will spill out and the flower will die #degenerative disc disease

[cranberrysoap]

headshot sketch i liked

#cran draws tag #lias/ #sketchins #i did some photo studies today before my toony stuff and it made me start wondering if i should #give Lias slightly more eyebrow? i would have to just try it for a while and see what i feel loll #he used to have a little more for a brief moment 10yrs ago but i was always flip flopping between that & thin lines b4 settling on thin lol #this is really random dw abt it oh fuck its 2am i should be asleep #edit cuz idk wanna make a whole post abt it but im actually kinda lost my mojo a bit so ive been like. #studying and doodling trying to get rid of it lol #cuz i tried to ink a wip the other day and couldnt do it suddenly lol so #obviously i need to do smth else for a bit