#I don't regret anything though

[riceballannie]

The funniest thing about All For The Game was figuring out who the love interest was because I swear to everything holy to me that I did mental gymnastics on the olympics level.

Because at first I thought it was Kevin. My first argument was "Oh yeah, people dig the tall, dark and traumatized Male Lead shit nowadays". And Kevin and Neil knew each other as kids? AND got traumatized TOGETHER? I was convinced it was going to be some dramatic ass reveal and some bonding afterwards or something because this was love interest material right here ( which I now know to be because Neil, Andrew and Kevin were intially supposed to end up in a poly relationship ).

Then Neil revealed that he did not swing and I was like "Cool, my dude is on the aromantic or asexual spectrum or even both, I respect that because who even needs a relationship anyway, he'll just stay hot, rich and single".

On the other hand I suspected Andrew and Kevin to have a thing for each other because they had the certain energy around them which even Neil noticed.

But??? I'm an overthinker. I overthink a lot and I analyze shit and I'm good at it and there was NO WAY there was nothing going between Andrew and Neil because I noticed the fucking build up from the get go. Their scenes together increased? Truth for a truth? Their moments on the roof? Neil asking and Andrew doing everything he asks? Neil putting Andrews hands under his shirt and Andrew letting Neil touch him? Neil going to the Ravens for Andrew? My alarms were blaring and my brain was working overtime and I figured out pretty soon that the both of them were endgame. At this point it wasn't even a question of 'if' but 'when'.

Yeah, suffice to say that Andrew, the man, the myth, the legend, still managed to come in like a wrecking ball and utterly annihilate all of my expectations with the iconic "That doesn't mean I wouldn't blow you" line. I remember I was on the phone with my sister and I fucking screeched because I expected it to happen just not at that moment.

... It was definitely an experience.

#aftg #neil josten #andrew minyard #kevin day #andreil #aftg neil #aftg andrew #aftg kevin #aftg andreil #all for the game #the foxhole court #aftg trilogy #aftg shitpost #This was an emotional rollercoaster #That I was thrown into because my sister promised me that the fandom had great fanfiction #I don't regret anything though

[kuroashims]

i finished both the one piece manga and anime, but after watching opla, started the anime all over again. 1084 episodes x 22 min = 23848 min = ...

WHAT'S WRONG WITH ME

#trapped in one piece hell #me while billions of people don't watch op because it's too long #I don't regret anything though #i know i know #one piece #opla #one piece live action #east blue sanji my baby #text post #non sims

[daily-odile]

Odile patting Molly Epithet Erased on the head, you know why

have two bc i care them

#in stars and time #isat #epithet erased #molly blyndeff #isat odile #I've been trying to draw this for like... 5 days straight.... #Thank you for making me obligated to draw this. honestly might not've if it wasnt an ask #anyways ya'll so hear me out. odile mother/grandma figure to molly #Honestly after thinking about it a little more Odile is actually quite different to Calliope based on descriptions alone? but #I think having a Dependable Trustworthy Adult in her life is. She needs it #We don't know a lot about Calliope and idk what parallels odile has with her; but I hope she reminds Molly of her mom at least a little bit #And for Odile's pov? I think she'd really really like Molly #She's more mature than most for her age and she's extremely observant and intelligent. Those are things Odile respect #Cue a dead mom joke though and odile very quickly goes to ''ok there's something wrong with this child'' #I don't think I have the idea fleshed out enough in my head to say anything for sure? But Odile and Molly having a Talk about her home life #would be Extremely interesting #Oops! Rambled in tags again! Teehee! #also do you think odile will ask molly for her full name only for molly to hit her with the #''molly wolly doodle all the day blyndeff'' and odile instantly regrets it #validation for bonnie #edit: rearranged tags just in case #day 19 #crossover

[witheredbouquet]

drawn for the dragonyule gift exchange on twt, so glad that i could join this year! thank you for hosting, saint starfall ♥

i hope that everyone has a wonderful dragonyule & a happy new year!

#dragalia lost #dragalia lost fanart #fanart #dragonyule gift exchange #my art #if you saw this already no you didn't LOL #sorry i don't post/use tumblr much and i messed up orz #my recipient was ritte! i dunno their socials or anything so i can't tag/link em - but i hope they it c: #food is based on stamina consumables in dragalia lost! chibi beast volk is based off his dragalia mini comic appearance! #anyway. been a while since i've taken the time to “finish” up a piece (and well. have the time to draw at all) so i'm glad i could do this! #i think i'm proud of the final result even though i still have lotsa room for improvement #(desperately trying not to nitpick things and ultimately regret posting this urghghghhhng) #one of the first times i've drawn food! i feel okay with the result hehe #learned that there's a more active DL community on tw*tter for fanart and stuff and i've never been more tempted to join shjdakfasa #plus so many zines are twitter only and i can't see most of the posts without an account #but yeah no thanks just tumblr is overwhelming enough LOL #anyway happy dragonyule/happy holidays to anyone reading this! we've made it through another year—i couldn't be more proud of us!

[braceletofteeth]

— I thought about how you would feel, so I didn't dare say anything.

— Shutting me out like this doesn't make me feel better.

#hidden agenda #hidden agenda the series #1x05 #joke x zo #jokezo #gifset #* #// #ah yes. the moment that made me feel like I was chewing on glass. #''how could I ever forget that'' excuse me while I-AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #oh god you don't UNDERSTAND zo you DON'T understand #but we do. because this is the guy who a few eps ago we saw daydreaming about kissing Zo #he wanted to kiss Zo for who knows how long #he waited for this he dreamed about this #and now you're telling him to forget about it like it meant nothing? 😭😭 #like his dream-come-true was no more than a MISTAKE for you????? #and yes guys it was important that I included all of Zo's visual reactions even though he's not saying anything #the important stuff is in what he's NOT saying #look at the regret and then SURPRISE on his face when he hears the reason WHY Joke is upset #he's only now starting to GRASP the dimension of how much Joke likes him #of course he reciprocated at least a lil bit or he wouldn't have kissed back BUT IT'S MORE THAN THAT #at this point in time Zo simply doesn't know how serious Joke's feelings for him are #or how much it hurts him to have them disregarded like that.

[kaidanalenkosprmanager]

THE BEST OF PRIORITY: THE CITADEL (PART 2)

Featuring: Cmdr. Sophie Shepard, Lt. James Vega, EDI, and Maj. Kaidan Alenko With: Councilor Donnel Udina, Councilor Tevos, Councilor Laiel Sparatus, Cmdr. Armando-Owen Bailey, and Kai Leng And a Special Guest Appearance by: The Illusive Man But sometimes the way a thing goes down does matter, Sophie. Later- when you have to live with yourself. Knowing that you acted with integrity- then it matters. Mass Effect 3: Legendary Edition (2021)

#mira makes gifs ✨ #sophie shepard #james vega #EDI #kaidan alenko #shenko #fshenko #mass effect #mass effect 3 #me3 #mass effect legendary edition #dailygaming #james’s panicked face as the shuttle goes down you will always be famous to me bc you are so relatable #at this point i just know the normandy crew is not letting shep EDI or james near anything mechanical anymore #(something mechanical explodes around them on literally every mission at this point- cars.. bombs.. ships.. you name it!) :) #the way i didn’t even realize EDI and kaidan were wearing matching armor on this mission until i got to the elevator and i- 🥹 (blue crew!!) #but like- the way when soph gets off the elevator and kaidan has the gun drawn and she tells them to lower their weapons?? #and EDI and james don’t even hesitate? THOSE ARE MY BABIES!!! THATS MY SQUAD RIGHT THERE!! THE LEVEL OF TRUST BETWEEN THESE THREE!! 🥹🥹🥹 #and they don't raise their weapons again?? not until soph raises hers?? like it's the level of trust between her and them for me 🥹 #i will say i talk a lot about how me3 shenko canon doesn’t really follow my own shenko canon (and my canon coup is MUCH DIFFERENT) #but something i noticed about the coup that i really liked? when kaidan has his gun drawn on shep you can see his hands shaking a little #it’s SO SUBTLE (and it’s easier to notice when you’ve got the video slowed down) but like?? the way his hands aren’t steady?? #when he has the gun drawn on someone he loves?? i cried a bit making that gif ngl 🥺 #the soft little ‘you won’t’ from shep after ‘i better not regret this’ makes me 🥺 every time. #there’s a canon reason soph doesn’t take the renegade interrupt but part of it is bc i like kaidan’s convo on the docks better :) #speaking of the docks the intro to the convo is a bit nonchalant but i like kaidan’s speech about integrity/living with your decisions #and the conversation between him/shep about what happened on the landing pad (though i wish it was a tiny bit longer!!) #there’s no ‘i feel like you would have taken me out’ line in the soph™️ canon but we supplemented it with some rewriting bc loose canon™️ #(she never draws a gun on the landing pad either but that’s a story for the actual canon 🙃) #and yes i gif’ed the ass shot. there’s only one valid ass shot in the series and it’s this one! and you can quote me on that! ✨

[false-oasis]

(CW: EoD Spoilers — What Lies Beneath Spoilers)

So I was talking with @/saladposse last night about the oni section and what the oni might use to torment our Commanders.

#gw2 #guild wars 2 #eod spoilers #gw2 spoilers #living story spoilers #I don't have a dedicated commander — there's a new commander for every expansion/ls combo who I feel fits the vibes better #Sarabi's kind of the de facto though and while there's some regrets she has — her inner demons manifests in what ifs and self-hate #by that I mean things she knows are true about herself that she wants executed and burred 6 feet under #and while it may have started off with tybalt and the whispers #the next stage wasn't eir but the heat was turned up WAY FUCKING HIGH with almorra and the charr/drizzlewood being stage 2 #the last stage would revolve around her bloodkin sister Kiarra and her niece and nephew #what would they think of her? the only thing she's poised to do is kill #how many lives is she willing to sacrifice? for the cause? for /her/ cause? #slashing her claws and gnashing her teeth at anything that moves — what happens when that's someone who looks up to her? #who she swore above anyone else to protect? so that they in their young lives could have a future? #the last demon would be her snapping to reality after pinning her nephew to the ground while her niece is pleading with her to stop #illusion fades away and it's rama being choked with gorrik holding a gun at her

[b1gwings]

swashbuckler rogue my beloved

#i would never regret the storm sorc/tempest cleric combo that i chose for Bonk because they're an absolute damage MACHINE #but sometimes i wonder who i would be if i had gone down the martial road instead #bonk literally has a pistol and a sword and they're pretty fucking good with both of them. you normally don't see that in sorcerers. #i think my attack bonus with the sword is higher than my spell attack bonus which is kind of insane #next time i level up i have to go through all my spells because honestly im starting to get a little tired of the same old lightning bolt #PLUS now i have transmuted spell so i can just take pretty much any damage spell i want and turn it into lightning damage #for my sweet sweet bonuses #there is just some part of me that needs to play a rogue though. swashbuckler. arcane trickster. soul knife. phantom. anything #normally i don't like playing stealthy characters but there are so many good rogues out there #even a “ruff boi” a la magnus burnsides (fighter/rogue) #multiclassing my beloved too i guess #so hard for me to make a character that i don't multiclass #i might even go paladin/bard with one of my newer characters eventually #inspired by calliope petrichor #but he's different. he'd be a bard because he's a theater kid #but also i want to play a straight up paladin because i want to explore with being a character who has a connection to a god #because i've never done that before #and the themes and motifs are too strong #idk man we'll see how it goes :) #i love dnd #ALSO i feel like i cant make him a bard because i already have TWO OTHER FUCKING BARDS #GUYS (sweating) IM NOT A BARD MAIN I SWEAR #maybe for my paladin i could just take magic adept and learn some bard spells or something? like beverly naddpod? maybe #but it's not about the spells... it's about the performance checks... #i really should be working on my finals right now #im so serious if you've read this far down 1 hi :) and 2 if u have dnd characters PLEASE tell me about them. bats my eyelashes. please

[moe-broey]

DEVASTATING. Guy who was born to hang out can't even do that right

#SAD ..... well there are other friends. #this is about being in a prolonged state of category 8 autism event (and not the fun kind) #everything and anything is making me wanna scream cry. #if i'm not put in solitary confinement right fucking now the results WILL be catastrophic #i condemn you to bed. 10000 years. #it's not a huge deal it's just kind of a bummer i had to bail out of belated halloween party #it's just me and my autism sweater in this cruel cruel world. and my blankets and my stuffed animals #i'm ngl i've been wearing that thang nonstop. i regret not wearing yesterday. #you know you're in for it when you cannot bear to wear anything but The Sweater and The Sneakers and The Sweatpants #or The Shorts. it is a little cold for The Shorts though. #one funny thing about The Sweater is that the shoulders/collarbone area are. crunchy. #from copious amounts of hairspray. #don't askme when the last time i did laundry was. i WILL cry. #i've jsyt been. yeah.

[woozi]

your friendship with belle is so cute lol i anon ask you both quite often and you’re both so interesting and when i see you on my dash tagging each other it makes me feel like that one ancient “now kiss” meme

#NAURRRR cause ms belle lizard on my leg literally is one of my closest friends (even counting my irls tbh) #cb we have to be oceans apart this earth is such a hatER!!!! #ok but fr <333 don't think there's anyone i've bared my soul to as much as i have w belle and i'll never regret it!!! #she's honestly one of the most amazing wise kind and well meaning people ive ever met #if there's anything i can be thankful for in this little shitsite it's that i met her tbh!!!! #atp if ion hear from her at least once a day my day feels ???? and i'm saur saur glad that even when we get busy at times we can just pick- #- things up like no time has passed at all #we cant kissie though we just gotta get old w our kitties atp NDNDJJDJDJS #ANYWAY BELLE LOVEPOSTING ASIDE 😭😭😭 #YOU are the absolute cutest?????????????????? #thanks for even sticking with me long enough to know my shennanigans LMFAOOO #also offering u friend chip if u'd like hehe 🥹👉👈 #hope ur day is as sweet as u r anon MWAH #anon #y.ask

[tonyglowheart]

reading thru old meta posts on qian qiu and there's like, some stuff I agree with sure but there's also a lot I don't lol. w like yan wushi especially. there's a lot of. I think too much conventional-mindedness in approaching yws even from the ppl who did like him as a character. saying he's a difficult character, and is meant to be a difficult character, but then still framing him along more conventional moral frameworks. yet another apartment 'complex'? strange, I find it quite simple moments.

#qian qiu #yan wushi #sorry so many of you are still hung up over the *chapter 45* '''''betrayal''''' rip but i'm different #(though I wonder if I'd feel this way if ppl hadn't made such a big deal of it and so I was expecting The Betrayal to be like. worse lol) #like for me since I was expecting *a* betrayal when I hit it in chap 45 I was like. this is it? lmao I thought it was sth actually serious #and then ppl like I can't let it go or I can't get over him saying he doesn't regret it - like god forbid women do anything forreal #the thing about yan wushi is he is not just master-less he's also in many ways *peer*-less #and that's why to him he was so much on the 'what a shame you're like the one guy who maybe could have been my rival but you're not' #I think ppl see rival as like. could be my enemy. but it's like. someone has to be your peer to be your rival #and it's very much established that yan wushi even before his power level is like maxed up has this wild potential #there's that chap where sq reflects on what qfg said abt yws having the potential to be better than him #but also I think it's a huge mistake to see/think of yws as amoral #he HAS morals. they're just not the same as yours #he doesn't care about the greater good as a rule but he's also not completely indifferent to it #and like. I think it's also a simplification to say that 'sq breaks the rules of yws's world of human nature being inherently corrupt etc' #I think that's a belief that yws holds about human nature but I think he's also like. smarter than to believe in absolutes? #and besides. to say it that way I think frames it as if yws is in denial about sq's existence and nature #I just don't get that sense from him - imo he sees sq as more of a curiosity than a like aberration #he's testing sq's bottom line not necessarily bc he's convinced sq is secretly evil but he because he wants to see what sq's bottom line is #and he wants to know that because sq's nature is so different than his own or those he generally encounters and understands from people #he's squishing sq like a dog with a chew toy not because he wants to destroy it but because he wants to see exactly what kind of noises #he can get out of it and exactly how far he can squish it before it starts being too much #(but also I think bc he sees sq's potential to be on his level and wants to see if that can get teased out) #in a like... bonsai shaping kind of way #yes he's pruning the tree back and sometimes pruning & shaping quite hard #but as with the art of bonsai - it's an interactive dance and like only the tree can add material #and for all that you can prune & shape the tree you will never know exactly what the tree will do #SQ is also like a tree in the sense that like you have to prune to get read of dead growth & also encourage new growth #and SQ goes from that like houseplant side of the meme that's like i'm allergic to tapwater #to flourishing under the adversity and the 'i can eat thru concrete'

[rawliverandgoronspice]

continuing the outline for thralls, and holy shit does it get intense, emotionally. I don't think I ever got teary-eyed while outlining, but I very much did here (and because of romance??? what is going on???), and... Like, I think that besides two subplots that are still pretty vague in my head right now, it is starting to look very strong, but. I'm still very much on the fence about whether this is a story worth telling, especially now, and especially by me.

don't get me wrong, I think it's a good story. but I'm not sure that's good enough of a reason to bring it to screens.

#thoughts #thralls of power #animatic project #I think ganondorf's arc in particular... *has* to be like that #like there's no going around how crushing the child timeline is for him in particular #even if I did manage to find a workaround for a lot of the gerudos (though not all because otherwise it's also a problem) #but I did write about stuff inspired by real historical events because of work before #including some I actually regret my involvement with #(not because it was actively bigoted but I just think it wasn't mature or insightful or legitimate enough to be worth the inclusion) #(and also: it came from the mind of people who had no personal connection with these) #(and then they had to be written up with really short deadlines with not enough time to question anything really) #(when the subject should have demanded much more rigorous and respectful handling and research in my opinion) #so yeah. not sure how I feel about any of this. #the current episode is mostly fine so I think I can at least finish up this one #(yeah because it's episodeS of course it is who is suprised not me that's who) #and then yeah I don't know

[linabirb]

i saw what you reblogged about chinese characters and. i almost cried. how did you pass. are you okay. do you need an ambulance.

I. I HAD SUFFERED SO MUCH. to be honest i'm not one of the best students in my class when it comes to chinese, mostly bc i skipped some classes, usually bc of health problems WE DO NOT TALK ABOUT HOW I SKIPPED ONE CLASS TO GO AND WATCH MAHIRU'S MV and uh. y e a h i had to do more assignments than other students so that i could get more grades and all of that.

idk if i've mentioned this before but our chinese prof actually wanted to have like. summer classes with us, like, not officially, but you know, she was just afraid of us forgetting everything because of the summer break and was like "so yeah, if anyone wants to go somewhere and just sit there and continue learning chinese, we can do that" AND I REFUSED. honestly, i love this prof a lot and she's very funny and her classes are interesting, but. please. i need a break. also that one classmate who annoys me the most you know the one btw she actually started acting even worse i just didn't tell you anything was the first one to agree to have those summer classes and she even continues to ask us if anyone will go with her AND NO!! LEAVE US ALONE!! (also sorry can i rant for a bit. so like our prof told us that we can pick any place, since those classes are not official and we don't have to actually go to uni, so this girl ORGANIZED LITERALLY EVERYTHING WITHOUT ASKING US and went "okay that's it we're going to the cat cafe i work at. that's where we'll have those classes. that's it." and when one of my classmates was like ".. but what if someone is allergic to cats" she just. stood there. istg if i hear her say something like "oh i just act like that because i have a hyperfixation and my hyperfixation is cats <3" LIKE?? STILL?? PLEASE THINK ABOUT OTHERS TOO???)

and also. my family keeps saying that it's okay i'm just a freshman (well not anymore but still) it's normal that i'm kinda bad at chinese but also. i spent like six or seven years learning japanese and i still don't know it that well so ;w; i just wish they would stop saying things like "oh you're so good at languages and all that stuff" like. i'm not even that good at english. come on. and also we actually had one class with our seniors AND THEY WERE JUST AS BAD AS US. i even was like "b-but i thought that if we spend more time learning, we'll get better-" and one of those students was like "WE THOUGHT SO TOO GIRL 😭" i will never forget how one of those seniors was like "hey btw i think i'm getting better at chinese" and our prof was like "really? :) can you write this character for me then" and he did it while looking so confident and i thought what he wrote looked really pretty and then the prof was like "please go back to your seat before i kill you right where you stand :D"

#at the same time i don't really regret choosing chinese as my second language class our chinese prof is definitely better- #than the spanish prof. also most of the students who chose spanish are kinda. like they're just kinda there they don't do anything #god i always feel so bad when i talk about that girl. like at the same time i get it she most likely really is neurodivergent but #i hate how she keeps unironically using that as an excuse for literally everything?? like. #idk man. idk i just feel like she kinda made that her whole identity and that's.. not good #BUT ANYWAY YEAH OUR PROF IS REALLY FUNNY LIKE there was a time when she forgot to send us an important assignment and we were like #“sorry when will you send it” SO SHE SENT US LIKE. A VIDEO MESSAGE AND SHE WAS STANDING NEXT TO A MOUNTAIN #and she was like “yeah sorry guys i'm a bit busy i will send it soon though :)” WHAT WERE YOU DOING THERE??? #[ 💌 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐚 𝐚𝐧𝐬𝐰𝐞𝐫𝐬 ] #[ 💕 𝐥𝐢𝐧𝐚'𝐬 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 ] #[ ☀️ 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝: 𝐬𝐨𝐥 ]

[mechahero]

#//sorry about all the fashion stuff on here lately #//it's just kind of an easy thing to post on here rn? #//that sounds weird i don't really mean it to sound like its lazy or anything #//anyways spent so long grinding for two whole clothing items from the winter shop and i'm so done with it LMAO #//ngl i kind of regretted the top at first but this pattern kind of saves it actually #//its cute on him! #//BUT LIKE HIS CLEAVAGE IS OUT!! #//ITS THERE!! FOR THE WHOLE WORLD TO SEE!!! #//took me off guard at first ngl ndjfnhgjf #//such a cute outfit though i love how this turned out in the end def saved this one #backup log {ooc}

[ihaventsleptinweekz]

Sometimes I think I'm a normal person then the 11 pm thought kicks in and suddenly I'm insane

#Going to mildly and vaugly vent in the tags to buckle up ^_^ #Will not clarify on any of this because it's more fun not to. Hope that helps #Anyway I'm kind of just. Weirded out by myself rn. Like I'm fine but I'm side-eyeing myself a little bit #And recently I've been believing thay I think really I was more immature a year ago #and while I do think back at her (year ago me) and kinda laugh at her for being overdramatic I feel kinda bad about it because yknow I was #But then I got kind of weirdly slowed down? In my being less freaked out process #Mostly because of Hellenite everyone say thank you hellenite (sarcastic love those fics so much) #But reading the fic kind of reminded me of the emotions that were going on at that time #And while I don't really miss or regret what happened too much anymore I think the general emotions of it started popping up again #Like idk how to say this but I'm over IT as a whole- but the emotions are still kinda left over? #Man really do NOT know how to put this #Cause it's kinda old news and frankly I am wildly happy with where I am right now #And I'm kind of thankful?? But also just a little :I about the whole thing. Which is making me inwardly side-eyeish #And I do think that I probably wouldn't change much if I could- and honestly I'm a little more embarrassed than anything else #Sorry for the weird long rambling tags just didn't want to call either of the like- maybe 3 friends I'd consider bringing this up with #I probably should check in with them though #Ough and I have work to do tmrw #Ew ew ew ew #Feel like this week has gone too damn fast and also not fast enough lmao #I'm also kinda nervous because I might have to take the ASL placement test soon to see if I qualify for skipping a couple ASL classes #Which would be nice cause I would LOVE to graduate quicker #And with all the AP classes I took in high-school it'd be nice to knock a bit of time off my college thing #Although admittedly I DID get that scholarship so it couldn't hurt??? #It might actually give me more time to get EIPA certified and check out some internships?? #Which would make getting jobs out of college WAY easier #Although maybe it'd be easier to get NIC certified if I retook a couple classes instead of trying to skip them??? God maybe I'd be behind #Ofc that wouldn't be a thing until after college #I'll probably have to save up money soon to start thinking about taking the test since it's so damn hard and so damn expensive #At least from what other interpreters have told me #Which is good!!! The it being hard thing anyways. Makes sure Deaf people get GOOD interpreters thst they deserve!!

[revengesworn]

thinking about agency + mikey and a different take on the final arc/ending. this may be controversial and i absolutely welcome discussion + disagreement here! in fact i kind of crave it. please.

honestly mikey is such a tragic character in part because he has like. no agency in his life, or at least very little. like he has no control. all because he's been cursed for something that wasn't even his fault whatsoever, he's basically destined to lose control at some point, and there's nothing he can do to save himself, not without relying on someone else to end the curse.

it's got to be so frustrating. he's never making choices in the series with full knowledge of what the future will bring. and in the end, when he's told about his fate in the futures takemichi returned from, he finally makes his own decision for once! he's finally able to achieve something, even if it's through sacrificing himself - he's able to protect his friends and achieve a happy future for them. it's not something he wanted for himself, but he wants it more than he wants them to suffer.

but in the end, that decision is snatched away from him. takemichi goes back in time and everyone is suddenly in danger again - and his decision has been completely ignored. draken dies as a result - and in the end, takemichi does too. of course, in the end, they DO manage to save everyone, and takemichi's decision was the right one, but...

on the one hand, should mikey be allowed to sacrifice himself for everyone? takemichi and the series itself would say no, because no-one should be forced to take on everything alone. mikey is wrong in his assumption that he has to bear everything by himself, it's unhealthy, and sometimes, when you care about someone, you can't just respect all their decisions and let them do whatever they want.

on the other hand, wasn't it still his choice to make? mikey never gets the chance throughout the series to choose a future for himself, and ultimately he plays no part in saving the people he cares about or himself. takemichi chooses to place everyone's lives in danger (and i'm not personally blaming him for this at all mind you) against mikey's wishes, and people actually do die as a result! if it weren't for the (entirely unexplained) miracle at the end of the series, they would've stayed dead, too.

idk where i'm going with this. i just can't help but feel that mikey's own powerlessness is extremely tragic. even then, i'm inclined to want to believe in the series message - that no-one should be forced to take everything on all alone. but is it okay to ignore mikey's own agency in getting him to change his mind?? it's just really interesting to me. does this make any sense at all or am i just saying words at this point idk i'm tired

#ooc #i'm going to regret posting this in about 5 seconds because i fear it's unfair on takemichi #so disclaimer: i love him and i don't blame him at all for anything he did in the series tbh #but. i'd love to play with this concept and write a mikey who's angry at having his choices taken away from him. #who has to deal with the frustration that he was never able to save himself too; though the first part is more important i think #come into my ims and discuss agency + tr with me pleaseeeeeeee ;w;