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rusmii · 2 months

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🎧₊ FUCK HIM, I'LL BE YO' BABY DADDY INSTEAD

homewrecker!chuuya, dazai, kunikida, fukuzawa, sigma, fyodor, nikolai x fem!reader who's in a toxic relationship

tags. hardcore smut, sfw hcs (not rlly sfw hcs), nsfw scenarios, toxic (ex) bf, ur favs fuck you so good🤞, cheating, fingering, g-spot hitting, stalking, manipulation, gaslighting, dubcon i think?, stalking, porn videos/photos, p->v, lying, no used protection, cuckholding, inviting third person, cowgirl, mating, doggy, cuffed and gagged, bondage gear, clit stimulation, praise/degration, spanking, revenge sex, sex ed lessons, oral (f/m), blowjobs, cunnilingous, nikolai eating readers pussy while carrying her on the wall, g-spot hitting, mentioned nikolai murdering your ex 💀, NOT PROOFREAD AT ALL, BANNERS/DIVIDERS MADE BY ME.

ps. I HATE THIS POST SM. IM NEVER WRITING SOMETHING LIKE THIS AGAINNN😭😭 !!!! as u can see i removed ango and tecchou..

i'm currently hosting a nsfw event for my 400+ followers that'll end when i hit 500 and im currently at 460+ already.. if u wanna join before it ends pls do so! I'll be posting all event reqs after the event closes <3

don't steal anything from @rusmii, including the contents of this post.

rules (for m.list) | taglist: @luvan1 @bfdazai @asqmi @squigglewigglewoo @liviash @doonifox @ishqani @xxcandlelightxx @iheartpieck @ezelium @saelique @little-miss-chaoss

00.1 #𝐊𝐔𝐍𝐈𝐊𝐈𝐃𝐀

CONFUSED ASF.

honestly brought up the topic abt calling the police multiple times.

is so sosososo confused on why you don't want him to help you and take care of the man :(

you're his best friend, so why don't you ask him for help??

well... he gets his answer one day when your urgently call him to come over.

The door swung opened. There, Kunikida saw you dressed in your skimpy lingerie with a small smirk on your face. "Kuni~ So glad to have you join us for tonight's punishment!" Confused, Kunikida raised his brow. "Is there something wrong?" He asks, allowing himself into the coze of your home — shutting the door lock. You shook your head, "No, just needed you and my boyfriend for something today." Your boyfriend. Concealing his snarl, Kunikida clears his throat and asks you to lead the way.

When you open the door down the hall, Kunikida is met by a man handcuffed and gagged in a chair as well as... bondage gear..? "[Name], what is this?" Kunikida questions, anxious about what you were going to say next. You say nothing and drag him inside the room, locking the door shut before having him sit on the bed. You bend your knees, now eye level to Kunikida's crotch, and what you say next surprises the fuck out of him. "Let's cuck my ex?"

Least to say, Kunikida couldn't deny your request — with how wonderfully beautiful you are, bouncing on his cock. He groans, your insides felt absolutely amazing. "[Name]~ Just like that, rotate your hips just like that - Ghnn~" He places his hands on your hips. You turn back to look at him, a lewd expression hidden by your composed structure. "Oh fuck! Mhm~ Kunii~ Your cock is so biiiigg!" You moan — Kunikida, as an ideal man, never thought that he'd let his best friend cowgirl him in front of her boyfriend. But yet again, you did say that he was your ex right before he started.

So he doesn't need to feel guilty because of his morals, right? That set aside, Kunikida glances at your ex, his face full of snot and tears. He grits his teeth, suddenly feeling hard as hell when he realizes that you were close. Your pussy clamps hard on his dick, the pressure causing him to thrust upwards. "OH!~ Fuck!~ Kunikida!!!~" You mewl, loving this sudden surprise. "Shut it - you whores are always so damn loud," he finally let loose, thrusting up roughly every chance he got.

You squeal, legs shaking and head thrown back. You could hear the muffle yells of your ex, but you didn't care. You didn't want to fuck his pussy soaked wrinkled dick from other girls. So as a last farewell, you spread open your legs — wide. "Kuni!~ Kuni!~ Gonna cum!~" You warn a second before you came — your juices spraying everywhere in front of you. Seconds after, Kunikida came deep inside your pussy — breeding you right in front of your ex boyfriend.

00.2 #𝐅𝐔𝐊𝐔𝐙𝐀𝐖𝐀

not much to say abt him since I didn't study up on his chara😞🙏

BUUT. fukuzawa would totally def be the type to let you come into his office at any given moment for his comfort :(

honestly wanted to murder the dude but remembered his principles and how he left behind that past, so he refrains from prying too deep into your business.

always there to lend a helping hand at tending to your bruises if you got any

even rubbing your clit to make you feel better on d-day of your break up:(

An audible groan came from you. Your legs spread wide open as you sat on Fukuzawa's lap. His fingers treading towards the depths of your lower half. "Fuku.." You whisper, turning your head to kiss him. He engulfs your lips without hesitation, his fingers finding your clit and circling around it slowly.

"There, there my lovely - he does not deserve you 'nor your love, my dear," he says softly into your ear. His raspy voice doing wonders to rile up your arousal. "It feels good~" A faint moan escapes from you as your fist clutches the fabric of his black haori — his green yukata wrapped around your naked body. "Does it? Then does this feel good as well?" He asks, his other hand on your breast, stimulating your nipple.

The soft tease of your privates sent waves of faint pleasure down your spine. "Hn~ Fuku~.. T-that - hic! Uh-huhh..~" You nod your head, unable to talk through your sobs. "Alright," he chuckles, fingers gliding back to your waist to bring your slipping body back up on his lap. "No need to cry, darling. That man does not know what he is losing." He wipes your tears.

Fukuzawa's hands grope at your breasts, softly and gently. "Break up with him today - you deserve better," he whispers into your ear, his fingers trailing down your breasts to your pelvic area. You hiccuped, feeling disarrayed. "But - Ghn!~" Cutting out any doubts you have left in your system, Fukuzawa flicks at your labia — his fingers making its way to your clit once again.

"You can. Don't let that man scare you." He starts rubbing at a rhythm he knows that's sure to get you squealing in his lap. "Fukufukufuku!~ - zawaannn!!" A long moan strides from your throat — his deep grumble faint. Fukuzawa uses his other to grab your cell, and the first looks for is your boyfriend's. As your high approaches it's max, you hear the sound of a phone ringing.

"As you cum, you're going to break up with your him," Fukuzawa whispers into your ear right before you heard your boyfriends agitated voice — never mind that. You feel his slender fingers slipping in and out of your cunt. The feeling excited you. "I - uh.. - 'M brea - Eehn!~ Breaking up with youuu!!~" You squeal, Fukuzawa's fingers being forced out with the pressure of your orgasm.

Fukuzawa hung up as soon as you announced it, rubbing circles on your stomach. "Good girl, you did so wonderful [Name]. See? There was nothing to fear."

00.3 #𝐒𝐈𝐆𝐌𝐀

this most likely happened at his casino

like say one day he sees you and goes "ooo pretty girl - nvm she got a husband'

but he sort of js watches you through his screens or subtly follows u around??? man can blend in but bit perfectly

so imagine his reaction one day when he catches your husband cheating on u with another girl in ur bedroom while u were in the shower?

yes he saw through the cams

easy! do the same while he's in the shower ;))

after sigma showed you all the evidence of your husband's affair, you were more than willing to get fucked the same way. "Fuck!~ Sir!~" You moan his name, yelping when a hand collides with your ass. "Shut it. Or do you want to get caught?" Sigma tuts, more motivated than ever when he hears your lewd mewls. But in truth, Sigma was nervous — what if you hadn't reacted the way you did? What then?

Your pussy clenches tight around his dick, bringing him back from stress hell. "Fuuck~ [Name], your - female reproductive system feels soo goood~" He moans from behind you, a hand smacking your ass. "Ah~ Th-the fuck - Gnh!~ Did you just say?" — "I said your pussy feels good! Now shut the fuck up before your cheating scum of a husband comes out and sees how much of a slut his wife is," he threatens — a sharp thrust ripping a moan out of you.

"A - yes sir! Mhmm~" A hand shoves your head down into the pillow. You hear Sigma mutter something, but you didn't bother to pay attention to it — having such good dick drill your pussy was mind numbing. "Ahn!~ Heen!!~" — "Shut up!" Sigma hisses, his thrusts speeding up. "Did you hear that? The tap turned off - your husband is coming out soon. And you better cream my dick before he does."

You mewl from his roughness, starting to feel that long awaited build up tip over. "Si-gmaa!!~ 'M cummin!!! Please! I'm gunna! - " The door is slammed open amidst your very loud moaning. You hear a gasp, and an angry shout come from the man behind you guys. "Shitshit - Mrs. [Surname] - your pussy feels sooo good," Sigma groans, pushing his dick inside your pussy as far as he can.

"[NAME]! What the fuck?!" — "Quiet. Your wife is a busy woman," Sigma shuts him up, pointing to your convulsing pussy wrapped around his dick.

00.4 #𝐅𝐘𝐎𝐃𝐎𝐑

is honestly not surprised by how toxic your relationship is

he knows that you're a person who's easily manipulated by those you care about

an absolute doormat you were

fyodor understands the emotions; fear and sadness — but what he doesn't do is sympathize for those who has it

when you came crying to him about how your boyfriend wouldn't have sex with such an inexperienced woman, he knew now that this was the perfect opportunity to teach you the sex ed you didn't know

Fyodor's nimble fingers dangle down your jawline, your face clutched in his palm. "Open your jaw, Angel." Though what intended to sound like a gentle reminder, served as a command by the male above you. Opening your mouth without complaint, you let him guide your lips to the tip if his dick.

"Now remember," his soft voice echoes through the room. "Tongue first, swirl it. Then suck the tip." Doing as he says, you start off slow — the hand softly petting your head encouraging you pick up your pace. "Mhm~ Very good," Fyodor groans, watching as almost half his dick gets slobbered up by you. He smirks, the advice he was teaching you was to specifically pleasure him, and only him. But of course, you didn't need to know that. Not when you were following his instructions so good.

"Angel~ Such a good girl~" He moans when you start engulfing his cock whole. "Ghic - Mhm - Fwyo," you gurgle, choking on his dick. Despite that, Fyodor understood everything you were trying to convey. "Don't worry, darling. 'M close, you can breathe till then." A hand picks at the root of your hairs, massaging your scalp as praise.

You whimper, your oxygen level starting to get low. Attempting to get him off quicker, you use your hands to jack off the remaining visible skin. Fyodor hisses, an audible moan leaves his mouth when his dick twitches. "Angel - just like that~ Keep doing that, good girl - fuck - Ангел!" As his lips part, he slips in a foreign word to you — a jaw dropping grip held tightly on your scalp as he came.

Because of the tight space between your head and his hands, you were forced to stay where you were, taking everything his dick had to offer. After a minute or two, Fyodor leveled his breathing and peered down. Your etched tongue and wide-eyed expression made him tingle a bit — "God - [Name]..." he heaves breathlessly, caressing your hair. Oh ‐ Fyodor was going to teach you well all right — your boyfriend is surely going to love your newly learned techniques once he's done with you.

00.5 #𝐍𝐈𝐊𝐎𝐋𝐀𝐈

BRO. THIS GUY.

being dismissive of your situation is not like him at ALL.

so yk what he does??? straight up murders the man and dumps him into the river to free you

then what do he do after that??

go to your place, relax, make you laugh, and get you to feel better abt yourself! — I mean, not like you weren't already feeling good, your ex of a bitch is finally gone from your life

and nikolai does give you the best night treatment of all time too;D (totally not my make up for the lack of nikolai)

"Fuck! Nikolai!~" You cursed, burning pleasure filling your veins as you were slammed onto the wall. Your legs were wrapped around Nikolai's head as he ate you out, using his surprisingly muscular strength to carry you with ease. His tongue danced around your labia and into your folds, teasing your entrance with the tip of his tongue. "Niko..~ Do something!" You whine, pushing his head further down in an attempt to feel more than the teasing tingling bits of pleasure.

He pulls away, a toothy grin staring right up at you. "Nu-uh," was all he said before planting a kiss on your thigh. " 'M gonna eat this pussy out like hub star~" — "Then hurry the fuck u-p-oghnn!!~" Your back arches off the wall, his tongue digging straight into your cunt. "Niko-Nikoniko!~ Th-at..~ Don't stop!" You plead as you moan. The white-haired man smiles against your pussy, his tongue roughly fucking into your sopping cunt.

"Ehn!!~ Fuck! Right there~" Grinding your crotch on his absolutely slobbered face, you release a long train of squeals. Nikolai curled his tongue, trying to find your g-spot. It took a few tries, but he knew he got it when you flinched and started squirming in his arms. "Fwucking sluut~" Nikolai's giggles were muffled by your cunt — but that didn't stop him from giving you teasing comments.

" 'M not!!!- Oghhh!~" He smiles, knowing that you're close. " 'Yer gunna cum on my tongue 'n nothing else!" He says happily, slurping up all your juices before shoving his tongue back inside with full force. Curling with such vigor, that tiny piece of flesh was hitting all the right spots in your pussy. "Nikolai!!!~ Nikolai!~ 'M - 'M -- Cu - !!!"

Without warning, a blast of your juices spraying onto Nikolai's face, blinding him for just a moment. He shuts his eyes, eager to keep going until you're whimpering in overstimulation — "Was I a better muncher than that stupid boy toy of yours?~" He asks, through his lopsided and arousal slobbered smile. But before you could answer, you felt yourself being pulled off the wall and thrown onto the bed. Oh man, tonight was gonna be a long night of relaxation.

00.6 #𝐃𝐀𝐙𝐀𝐈

give him credit, dazai is trying his best not to shoot him on site — fingers itching the trigger on the gun in his back pocket.

he literally stalks him and takes photo/video evidence of everything your boyfriend does — threatening to show the world about his infidelity to the world.

sure, people in Japan wouldn't care as much as people from the west but at least women know who to look out for.

so that's what he ends up doing — exposing him to the world and tagging his company, his hookups, his family, everyone that dazai could get his information on.

you, on the other hand, came crying to dazai's doorstep when you were blamed for everything.

perfect — he thinks. now that you were here, he'd show you how much of a douche your boyfriend actually was.

"[Name]~ Come on, I know you can do it," Dazai purrs into the nape of your neck, his hot breath fanning your ear. "I - 'M trying! Hn~" You moan uncomfortably. Being shoved face down into the sheets wasn't the idle position for you, but who were you to complain when you were getting dicked down so good.

Dazai thrusts inside your cunt slowly, forcing you to feel every vien and crook his dick had to offer. Your body shook, his dick plunging straight into your core — almost hitting your cervix. "Mhm~ Darlin', you feel so good," He praises. "Dazai..~" You mewl his name, your body responding to him well. Dazai's hand presses your back, forcing your face to dig deeper into the pillow. "Your boyfriend won't mind if I fuck my children into his girlfriends womb, hm?~"

"Heii!~ Y-yes he wouldhnn!!~" You grit your teeth, pleasure racking up your body as he rotates his hips slowly. Dazai made an annoyed grunt, "What?" He makes a sharp thrust. "That's not what he told me the other day." He says, shocking you. "Huh? - What does..nn~ That mean..?" You ask — questions full of doubt starting to take over. Did your boyfriend not care about you anymore?

Dazai chuckles, another calculated thrust sliding over your g-spot. Like he could he read your thoughts, he pats your ass softly. "Aw~ 'M, so sorry, dear... Has he not been telling you of all his bitches he's been fucking behind your back?" And right on cue, you start to thrash in his grip. "Shut up! No, he didn't! Osamu - I swear to god -" — "Then what's this?" Cutting you off, Dazai shoves his phone in front of your face and starts swiping on the multiple photos of girls being dicked by your boyfriend.

You froze, tears starting to well up in your eyes. Was he really doing these things behind your back?... "Poor [Name], so naive.." Dazai thrusts slowly behind you. You sniffle, "He.. - How long?" — "A week after you two started going out," he says, dragging a thrust. Dazai then swipes onto a video of your boyfriend and a girl in the same position as you and him — pressing play, he sets the pace and rhythm to match your boyfriends.

"See that? How he thrusts inside his bitch like you never existed?" His words stung, the moans of your boyfriends stung, everything stung. "If he's fucking her like that then..." A powerful, deep thrust came from him. "Then he wouldn't mind this, now would he?" You sigh, pleasure starting to consume your senses again. "Yeah.." You moan.

Closing your eyes and letting your head fall back onto the pillow. Dazai smirks, playing the video louder — thrusting faster to have your moans drown out the video. He could feel your cunt squeeze his dick — a painful groan escaped his lips. "Fuck - [Name] keep squeezing like that." His thrusts now shallow and fast. "Hiinnn!!~ Osamu!!~ Osamu!~ I - Can't -" — "Hold it," he orders, his sloppy thrusts becoming vigorous.

"Ha~ Mhm!~ 'Sam-'samu!!~" You squeal, legs giving up as you came — your pussy squeezing him so tight he only had a second to bracr himself for his orgasm. "Fuuuck~..." He groans next to your ear, dutifully creaming your insides. "Haa~ normally.. I'd call you a bad girl and - hgn~ Punish you, but..." He pulls out, flipping you over on your back and spreading your legs. He watches as his cum oozes out your pussy, and grabs his phone.

He angles the phone to capture his still hard dick along with your pussy and fucked out face. "This seems like a fitting punishment enough for another person." He laughs. Going to your boyfriends number and sending him the picture, captioned; 'Be prepared to raise my children;)’

00.7 #𝐂𝐇𝐔𝐔𝐘𝐀 (fic bonus!)

anger. anger was all he felt every time he opened his door to see your swollen eyes and packed backpack whenever you and your boyfriend had a fight.

"shit - you okay?" he would ask as he settles you in, bringing you a cup of hot chocolate to sip while he runs you a bath.

and when you tell him you're fine, he calls bullshit but doesn't pry you further, wanting to get you as comfortable as possible at the moment.

"why don't you leave him? you're friends with the fucking mafia for fucks sake." he groans next to you, a cozy blanket. a bit too intimate for friends but it didn't matter if you two were close friends.

"it takes time. besides, i love him too much to leave him like that." you would reply back, leaning your head on his shoulder. the action not helping him stay in his lane.

it starts with small and subtle actions. things your boyfriend would refuse to do, chuuya did with/for you.

it made your heart swell every time, and just when chuuya thinks he's finally got you in his grasp — you go and happily announce your ex's fake ass apology.

this irks chuuya to the fucking core. what the hell does that serial cheat have that he doesn't? he's got money, looks, hell — the goddamn loyalty your ex lacks.

but every failed opportunity eventually combines into a one in a life time chance, right?

You sniffle, the alcohol intoxicating your system was finally reaching its peak. you glance at chuuya, his red face from the intensity of the situation and the wine from moments earlier made you fell swell inside. "Chuuya," you tug on his sleeve, making him look at you. "What? Wanna talk shit 'bout that dick more? -" — "- I think I love you."

Chuuya froze — was he hearing things right? Or was it just the alcohol buzzing his brain? "What?" He asks, still unsure of what he heard. "Thank you," you corrected your mistake, turning away when he attempts to lean closer to you. "No - I heard what you said. You said you loved me," he insists, taking you by the arm when you try to get up. You shook your head, invulnerability starting to wall up. "No, I didn't."

"You did." He repeats, dragging you back down into his lap. Though you couldn't see him, you could feel him burying his head into the back of your neck. "You love me," he whispers again — like it was some sort of affirmative confirmation. You stayed silent, afraid of what you might say next.

But what happens next is a blur. One thing happened that led to another, and another, and another — A groan falls next to your ear. His lips pursed, giving your ear a soft kiss before moving down to where your neck was. A line of hickies was the aftermath of the marking attack. "Chuuya," you say.

"I know," he says back. Stripping you of your clothes while trying to unbuckle his belt at the same time. You took pity on his struggle and took off your own shirt, unlacing his belt for him with a few twists. He stood on his knees, drunkenly watching with only one goal in mind — to take care of you.

"Lay down for me," he commands — your nimble fingers pressing against his chest as he circles up your waist, unclipping your bra and tossing it aside. Listening without a complaint, you lay still — the humming buzz from the wine, making you feel light-headed and impulsive. Chuuya's fingers make it to the waistband of your underwear, pulling on the elastic to stretch it — dragging the piece of cloth down your legs.

The cold air presses your labia — a foreign feeling from the lack of sexual activity between you and your boyfriend. And Chuuya knew that all too well. So when his fingers approach your lips, he's careful to gently touch it. You whine, the feathery feeling of his fingers rubbing your folds wasn't giving you enough stimulation to feel pleasure.

Chuuya swats away your hand from your clit, tsking as he does so. " 'M the one taking care of you - trust me, m'kay?" He soothes you, placing your hand back down to the side before readjusting his position. Chuuya was now hovering over your body — his already lubricated fingers pushing in one at a time. Your breath hitched, toes curled, and lashes futtered. "Ch-chuuya~..." You moan his name, the foreign feeling being washed away by a new sense of tingling pleasure. "Don't moan my name just yet - we haven't even got to the fun part," he says, his lone finger curling over your sensitive spot.

"O-okay - Hc!~" Another finger entered you. This time, the burning stretch was more noticeable. Chuuya notices your slightly scrunched face and bends down to give you a chaste kiss. "It's 'kay," he mumbles on the corner of your lips. " 'Tis only gonna hurt for a little bit - I know pain like this will soon turn into ecstasy for my girl when I do this." He curls his fingers, both brushing over your g-spot while he does. "Ghn ~ Hic -" Your eyes roll up slightly, the sudden bundle of pleasure hitting you like a boulder.

"Fuck - Fuck~" You drunkenly moan, the back hairs of your nape zizzing up from the chill. "Mhm, keep doing that," you command, letting out another loud moan when Chuuya rolls over your g-spot again. "Clit stim?" He asks, already rubbing your nub with another finger — but really, there was no point in him asking if he was just going to go ahead and do it. "Sh-it ~" A moan came from you, your head tilted back.

After a few more curls of his fingers, you felt that pressure in your abdomen that you craved for so long. "Chu-Chu- 'M gonna - Cu - Hnn~" His fingers picked up the pace when he heard your little warning. "Cummin'?" He chuckles, his fingers rubbing your spot. "Chuuya!~" You moan his name, feeling your approaching high climbing the coaster faster. "Fuck - can't believe I get to experience this. So fucking pretty - 'yer so damn beautiful." He praises. A combo that never ended well with holding out on your orgasms.

Your back arches, feet kicking the sheets as your hands desperately grasp for anything it can. "Cu-Please~ 'M - " — "Cum for me," Chuuya orders, his final swirl causing you to spiral. The peak of the coaster now falling down. "Shiiit - pretty girl." Chuuya spoke as he watches you drench his fingers. Once you were done with your high, you look up at Chuuya — his face glaring with glea. "Hi."

"Hi. How was it?" He asks you, rubbing soothing circles on the side of your leg. You laid there, reflecting on what you just done. Letting your best friend finger the fuck out of you even though you had a boyfriend. Oh fucking — what a damn predicament you were in. "I -.. I don't know." You admit, the awkward feeling of post orgasm hitting you. In a way, you felt guilty. Cheating on your boyfriend like that — but at the same time you felt giddy. The pleasure of sex finally being given to you by your best friend.

"Don't think too hard 'bout it," he picks up your hand and kisses your knuckle. "I'll be a better baby daddy then that fucker ever was." He winks with a smile, bringing your hand down to his twitching cock.

"I'll be a better baby daddy then that fucker ever was." Was the last rational thing you heard before you started stroking his cock. His breath hitched — a sigh of pleasure escapes his lips. "Fuck - you really know how to stroke a cock," he chuckles, watching as you smear his precum around his dick. "Hm~ Maybe you just never had a good stroke before," you tease his tip, a bubbly smirk donning your face.

He grins, stopping you from doing anymore and pushing you down on the bed. "Maybe - how 'bout you show me how good pussy feels next," he challenges, pushing inside your already stretched cunt. "Oh fuck! - Chuuya~" You moan, his dick curving perfectly inside your walls. "Hnn..." He grunts above, throwing your legs over his shoulders. "Finger fucked the shit outta' you earlier. Now my dick is gonna do the same," he pulls out just to the tip and gives you a harsh, first thrust.

Angling his thrust perfectly on the first try, Chuuya groans when he feels your walls clamp tighter. "Shiiit - baby you feel so fuckin' good." You moan at his praise, the feeling of his dick so snug inside was making you tear up. "Mhm!~ Chu - Hic - Good! Soo guuudd~" You slur on your words — Chuuya dicking you down better then any man that has even touched you.

He smirks, rotating his hips, watching as your eyes water even more due to the slight intoxication from the wine earlier. "Hnn~ Wait - 'Tis not enough." You whine, your head drooping to side. Chuuya curses. In normal circumstances, he'd tell you to ease up and love you slowly — but now? well, now the alcohol wants him to go to pound town on your pussy. And he was going to do exactly that.

Chuuya pulls out to the tip again, slamming his hips against yours as he thrusts inside. This time, instead of getting you adjusted to his cock, Chuuya fucks you with vigor. "Fuck!~" You moan, back arching off the bed a little. "Bitch wanna get fucked like the little cheating whore you are? Shit - I'll give ya' the same fuckin' treatment as porno hires." Threat or not, it was fucking hot. You loved the dirty talk and rough treatment Chuuya was giving you.

Folding you over, Chuuya picks up his pace — his dick now ghosting out of your entrance as it fills up your cunt every millisecond. "Chuuyya~ Chuuya!~ Chuuyaahnn!!~" He hears you sputter his name — drool dripping down from the corner of your mouth. Chuuya sees and sticks his fingers inside your mouth, moaning at the sudden clench of your cunt. "T-Toooo muuuchh!!!~" You gag on his fingers, tongue webbing around them.

"Nah - you said you needed this," he lied, putting words into your mouth. "So don't go fucking wailing like a damn hurt dog - remember, you were the one who pounced on me like a cheating little slut." He exaggerates on the last three words like it was his bragging rights. "C-can't!" You twist your body, the overwhelming pleasure building too much on your abdomen. Chuuya cooed, mockingly. "Yes, you can, sweetheart. Don't let my dick get in the way of your creamin'."

A loud moan escapes Chuuya's mouth as your pussy latches onto his dick — dragging its velvety walls so nicely. "Fuuuckiinn---ggg shiiiiit - [Namenamename] - making me feel so - Ghn~ Fuck! Good~" — Hiinnnn!!~ Chuuyyaaaa!!!~" You both spew nonsense at the same time, the wine finally taking its toll on your conscious control.

"Fuuckfuckkfuckfuckkk~ 'M cummin - Shit I'm -" Chuuya whines, the pleasure overtaking him, his rhythm stuttering and his dick twitching uncontrollably inside your pussy. You couldn't even speak anymore — all sorts of voiced thoughts were replaced by moans. "Shit - you cummin'? Can feel you squeezing the shit outta' my dick..." He grunts.

After a couple more thrusts and Chuuya's fuse fucking blew. He was cumming so hard his eyes rolled back and he had to clutch you to keep himself grounded. Once he opened his eyes, he was met to the sight of your fucked out, twitching body — and a lovely creampie! Hopefully, your boyfriend doesn't mind the fact that you two didn't use protection.

hi. I hate this post.

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caesium-55 · 1 month

Text

—seven days [ epilogue ]

pairing: max verstappen x manager! reader

summary: as the third time world champion, max verstappen's manager, you function on the belief that whatever max verstappen wanted, max verstappen shall get. but this time, after four years of working as his manager, you can't give him what he wants anymore and that was to stay.

warnings: mentions of death and suicide.

author's note: here's the epilogue and the end end of the seven days series. thank you everyone for showing love to this fic! i was honestly so overwhelmed by the sheer amount of all of you. also, i apologize for all the broken hearts i caused after posting chapters 4-7. stay safe yall! i'll rest my fingers for real now. my doctor wasn't very happy with me. NOT BETA READ. NOT EDITED.

tags: @whatamidoingwithmylife-ramdom @eugene-emt-roe @bellezaycafe @barnestatic @theseerbetweenus @wcnorris @notyouraveragemochii @lpab @vildetry06 @a-beaverhausen @formula1mount @loloekie @alucardsdaddyissues @juky-ps @cassianswh0reeee @devotedlycrookeddonut @amberpanda99 @supermaxv1 @evie-119 @spideylovin @harianaswhore @formulaal @landorris @onecojg @leclercdream @vicurious28 @c-losur3 @spookystitchery @0710khj @strollnstroll @justab-eautifulmess @ssrcsm @seasonswinter @kravitzwhore @mycure156 i hope i didn't forget anyone

masterlist.

Julio [Name] was not an ambitious person. He didn't have dreams or concrete plans in life. But in 1985, his first dream was born. He wanted to be an F1 racer after reading about the Portuguese Grand Prix in a local newspaper where he saw a Brazilian racer even younger than him participate in it and winning it. Ayrton Senna was the racer’s name, twenty-five years old. At that time, Julio [Name] was the same age.

He immediately searched for the nearest karting track. He brought his then girlfriend, Sally Kingston, a dental student in USC, to the kart zone for their date. It was safe to say that driving was not exactly his forte. He crashed his rental kart and had to pay the damages. He was afraid that he made himself a loser in front of the Sally Kingston, the richest, prettiest, and nicest girl from L.A., and that she wouldn't wanna go out with a bumpkin like him anymore, but she had only laughed at him—her eyes turning into little crescents, showing too much teeth and gums—and from then and there, he knows he’s going to marry Sally Kingston one day. He might not have become a F1 driver, but he ended up marrying the girl of his dreams.

Him and Sally welcomed a son in 1991. They named him Damiano and he turned out to be a carbon copy of his beloved wife, not that Julio was complaining. When Damiano turned five, Julio brought him in the kart zone and let him try driving the kart. Damiano adored it so Julio signed him up for racing school. Three weekends later, Damiano got sick of driving around in circles so he stopped. Sally gave birth to a daughter in the same year—1996.

Five years later, he brings [Name], his mija, into the kart zone. He expected that you’ll be like Damiano, too, getting sick of the thing after three weekends or so. You didn't. You loved karting and going fast, almost dangerously so. You lasted five weekends so Julio signed you up for the kart zone’s junior racing school and you were their first female member. You won your first race when you were six, only seven months after you officially joined.

“She was born to race,” the team head told Julio. Julio then decided that he’d do whatever it takes so you could become a F1 driver.

Like his initial dream, his dream for you couldn't be brought to reality. When you were nine, you had to stop karting for financial reasons. Damiano was in high school, Rafael had leukemia, and Dominic had just been born. When Julio told you the news, you were sad but you understood why the decision was made so you never complained. You learned how to play billiards instead and your Abuelo was the one who taught you. It's cheaper than karting so Sally and Julio gave you their full support.

Julio [Name] was pleasantly surprised when you told him that you got accepted in USC’s engineering department years later. He half expected that you’d be like Damiano, who took an interest in dentistry, and was attending dental school. He was going to be a dentist like his mother. He was a perfect copy of Sally.

“If I can't be a racer, I’ll become a mechanical engineer,” you declared, head held high. Julio couldn't be anymore proud. You were living his dream.

If you asked Julio [Name] if he had lived a happy life despite not reaching his dreams, he would say yes without hesitation. He married the love of his life, Sally Kingston, now Sally [Last Name]. His first son, Damiano, had topped dental school and followed in his mother’s footsteps. His daughter, [Name], graduated with flying colors, a mechanical engineering degree under her belt and entered the motorsports industry, the first in the family to do so. (You even got him Fernando Alonso’s autograph! That's his second favorite driver!) Not only that, she volunteered at the LAFD during her college years and competed in a billiards tournament in Vegas, Australia, and the UK. You had the potential to be an international-level pool player but you didn't pursue the sport because you wanted to be an engineer. Rafael didn't let leukemia beat him and now, he’s finishing up his last year in CalTech, pursuing mechanical engineering like his older sister. A research team in Sweden had been eyeing him for a while now. Dominic, on the other hand, is steadily building a career for himself in volleyball. He was offered a sports scholarship in Harvard so, despite the fact that he’s going even farther than his siblings with no relatives near him like in L.A., Julio pushed him to pursue what he wanted. His children are his pride and joy. He spent every single day bragging about his children to his colleagues. The others had expressed their envy to him. Did Julio save a country in his last life to have such great children?

Furthermore, he’d been promoted to be the captain of Station 131 in Austin. Julio may not have driven an F1 car but he wouldn't even trade this family over anything in this world, not even the life of luxury and thrill of a Formula One Driver.

(What Julio didn't know was that Damiano had serious depression in dental school that he carried even after graduating, that you weren't accepted as an engineer in F1 and was stuck in a managerial position for the last five years, that Sweden found a better researcher than Rafael so he’s stuck suffering physically and mentally in a degree with his future unclear and cloudy, and Dominic was slowly losing passion in volleyball but it's the only thing putting him through college right now so he grits his teeth and put himself on court. No one told Julio. Julio got enough of his dreams broken already.)

Truthfully, despite working for Red Bull for half a decade, you never liked its taste. You were always the Monster Energy type of girl. It's the one drink that kept you functioning through all the all-nighters you pulled in engineering school. However, you kind of lost the palate for Monster Energy so now, here you are, standing outside a gas station mini mart in the middle of the dusty highway that leads to El Paso. You hold the chilled can of Red Bull against the side of your neck, satisfied with the feeling of something cool pressing against your skin. The temperature in Texas is going absolutely crazy this time of the year. In your other hand, two cigarette sticks balance in between your fingers. You crave the deadly nicotine. Desperately. But you're not stupid enough to smoke at a gas station because of your cravings.

Your phone vibrates and you pull it out of your pocket to see who messaged you. You snicker when you view the barrage of pictures from the Austin Grand Prix that Leo sent. A stolen shot of Logan, meme faces of Alex, the air show, a selfie with THE Fernando Alonso, and a Tiktok video with the other Williams mechanics.

You watched the race from the stands today and truthfully, you prefer watching the race in the garage than on the stands. It's unbelievably boring to be there. People pay thousands of dollars to sit under the excruciating heat of the sun and catch a glimpse of very fast cars for a nanosecond. You wouldn't even catch sight of if you blink. Nevertheless, you're happy that Leo is having the time of his life. You wish you share the same shoes.

leo: so so sad that u have to go

you: id be flattered if u actually mean it

leo: *rolling eyes emoji*

leo: i hope you choke on your beer

you: i hope you choke on the celebratory champagne

you: and i dont drink and drive

leo: good to know ur not stupid

leo: on a serious note make sure to drive to el paso safely

you: aight aight

leo: u know i have something to confess

you: if it's something stupid, don't bother

leo: ur stupid

you: fuck u

leo: shut up

leo: just wanna say i didn't break up with u bc u gave max too much attention

leo: i know that's what i said but i only said that bc i knew that u needed max to achieve ur dreams

leo: and idk i just thought max wouldn't give it to u not when im still dating u

you: that's stupid

you: max isn't like that

leo: hes in love with u

Your heart stutters. You ignore it.

you: liar

leo: i could tell u lil shit

leo: idk he looked like someone who’d hold a grudge

you: he does hold grudges

leo: and i cant allow myself to stand in between you and the one person who can give you your dream you know?

leo: i loved you enough to let you go to him

You choke on your saliva. You don't love Leo romantically anymore and you are sure that the feelings are mutual but his abrupt confession is enough to bring back the pain of loving him and letting him go all over again.

leo: u sure u won’t stay to see him?

leo: he’s the one who wants to see you the most

you: his ig messages makes me think otherwise

You're a fucking coward. A pussy.

leo: you didn't see the man [name]

leo: you don't know how empty he looks now

A shadow of guilt darkens your eyes. You quickly shove your phone into the pocket of your jacket. You open the Red Bull and take a large swig, almost draining the entire can. You exhale loudly after drinking, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand. You stare at the vast expanse of the dry earth before you, starting to understand the appeal of aimless road trips in the southern roads.

The world seems to be turning in slow motion now.

Ever since your father died, time feels like it was moving too fast. You arrived at the hospital half an hour after Julio was officially pronounced dead. At that time, you felt like the world was ending. Your knees gave out in the middle of the hospital hallway. Your mother’s wail echoed in your ears. Damiano and Dominic were trying to console her, both of whom were crying terribly. You stare at them, face empty despite the hurricane brewing within you. Rafael wrapped his arms around you and you held onto him as he cried uncontrollably.

Your mother possessed a weak heart. She’d grown weaker and weaker day by day after your father passed. Your father’s station held a ceremony for him to pay tribute to their fallen captain. You were the one who carried his helmet all throughout the ceremony because the entire station knew you were his most prized child. When you flipped the helmet, there was a photo taped on it. A photo of the entire family at your graduation ceremony in USC. You maintained that tired and empty stare during the entire procession. In the middle of the ceremony, your mother collapsed.

Your father’s death was the first domino to be tipped. Your mother’s collapse during the funeral was the second. From then on, everything turned to shit. Your mother had always been frail and prone to sickness so it didn’t surprise you when she had grown so weak in a matter of days. She couldn't sleep. She didn't want to eat. She lost her will to do anything else. You took her to the hospital after a week because you were afraid she was beginning to become malnourished. Damiano suggested moving your mother to El Paso, to your Abuelo and Abuela’s farm, so your mother could recuperate there, and you agreed. The entire family moved to El Paso quickly, leaving the house in Vista Del Pueblo empty and celebrated the New Year there.

You opened your phone for the first time since you landed in ATX on the 30th and a barrage of messages had been sent to you. From Daniel, Logan, Leo, Kendall, Julia. You freeze when you see Max’s name. Your finger hovers above it, hesitating. Your mind trailed back to the five years you spent in Red Bull, to all the memories with Max in it, to what happened inside his penthouse in Monaco, the jet, the night you spent in his sheets, the shoes and—

Fuck.

“Kelly,” you mumbled to yourself, typing her username in the search box. You began typing up a message. You're not mentally equipped to write a long message of apology. Your mental dictionary was not ready to use so you decided to half ass the entire message and hope for the best.

you: sorry about the breakup

you: i didn't know about the shoes

you: i didn't take it

you: im so sorry

you: i hope you're not too hurt

In truth, you loved Kelly for Max. You never had problems with her. At first, you were concerned about the great age gap between her and Max as she was even older than Danny but then you figured that you did not have a say because Leo was also younger than you, born in the same year as Max. Then, you saw how she was so caring to Max, so patient in dealing with his misplaced anger, so supportive. You saw how Max transformed into a better version of himself, something you are not even capable of doing, because of Penelope and Kelly. How he became the world's most massive girl dad without trying. You ignored every bitter feeling that sprouted on your chest because you saw Max was happy and his happiness always came first. And now, you’re here, apologizing to Kelly for taking Max away from her.

kelly: i think i’m the one who’s been taking him from you

kelly: take care of him for me

you: thank you for loving him

You can't imagine how hurt Kelly was. Imagine dating and preparing a man so he could be perfect for another girl.

you: but i can’t do what you're asking

you: not anymore

“Not anymore,” you whisper to yourself, as if uttering it to the wind would cement it as the truth.

Not anymore, Max. I’m sorry.

Rafael and Dominic told you that they want to drop out of college to help you out with Mama a few days after New Year’s. You quickly told them no, to finish college and that you could handle taking care of two senior citizens and your sickly mother and help out on the farm since you’re essentially jobless at the moment.

The third domino is Damiano. You were always aware he’d been clinically depressed, taking medications to help him get better. Whatever he went through in dental school, he carried it with him until he was working. You believed he was getting better. He was seeing a therapist for years now and you were checking up on him every day. Then, like Mama, he just…. became worse. Rafael found him submerged in the bathtub in his apartment, red painting his wrists. Had Rafael not been there at the right time, Damiano would have followed Papa Julio.

The fourth domino is Dominic. He ruined his hand in March. The doctor told him it was dangerous for him to continue playing volleyball competitively. It was either he learned how to set with only his non-dominant hand because his dominant hand is partially crippled or he stopped playing all together. He’d choose the second option with no hesitation as he had lost his passion for the sport but if he’s not playing for Harvard anymore, no one would be able to pay his fees until graduation. Not when Julio died, not when Sally was too sick to continue working, not when Damiano was currently unstable, not when you’re the only one who had been supporting the entire family through your entire savings account. Red Bull must have paid you a lot of money because you’ve been keeping the entire family afloat for months now.

The fifth domino is Rafael, who got his entire thesis overhauled so now, his graduation was out of the picture. It sucked. He’d always been expected to follow his older siblings’ footsteps, both of whom are academically excelling individuals and Rafael had been studying and studying and studying. So why was this happening to him? Why was this happening to his family?

The sixth domino was yet to be tipped over.

You refuse to fall.

You blink, suddenly back in reality when you hear a loud caw of a bird flying above your head. You shake your head, tossing the Red Bull in a nearby trash can and returning inside the mini mart. The amount of caffeine in a Red Bull isn’t enough. You need more. You need fucking coffee.

Gas station coffee sucks but you’re never the type who complains. El Paso is still eight hours away and you’re sure you're going to be driving your motorcycle the entire night just to reach the farm the next morning.

You walked towards the Yamaha XSR 155 parked in front of the mini-mart, a styro cup of coffee that’s as black as your soul and as bitter as your life in your hand. Hypnotizing swirls of steam rise from the cup. In each step you take, the key that is attached to your hip jingles.

It's a little past four in the afternoon but the darkness of the sky makes you think it's around six PM. You pocket your cigarettes and stand beside your motorcycle, hand on your hip while the other brings the cup of coffee to your mouth. A car suddenly arrives, coming to a screeching halt in front of you. You flinch in surprise, almost spilling your coffee in your hands. You hiss loudly, brows furrowing, a curse sitting on the tip of your tongue. You hear the sound of a car door opening and slamming shut and when you look up—

“Max.”

He’s still in his Red Bull overalls, drenched in sweat as if he ran to the gas station instead of driving. His hair is windswept, sticking out in multiple directions almost attractively so. He looks simultaneously distraught and relieved when your eyes met. The longing in his eyes. God. You unconsciously take a step back and turn around—a flight response—when he charges in your direction.

A strong pair of arms wrap around you from behind, stopping you from your tracks and causing your coffee to spill and fall down pathetically on the floor. You avoided the puddle, hands reaching behind you to guide Max away from the steaming liquid. But it’s too late. You saw the hot coffee touch his skin.

“Max!” you exclaim, eyes going wide. Your hand wraps around his forearm, pulling it but his grip on you tightens so you resort to tapping his arm in hopes that he’ll let go and you can inspect his injured hand and make a quick run for the mini mart for first-aid supplies.

“Max, let go,” you say, panicking. “Your hand—”

“Don’t leave,” his voice cracks.

“I won't go, okay? Let go and I’ll—”

“No,” the hug tightens and you suck in a breath. “You’ll leave again. I know you’ll leave again.”

“I’ll fix your hand. You can’t burn your hand—”

“I can endure it. Let me have this please,” he pleads. You pull his hand but Max remains stubborn. Resigned, you sigh. It turns out that you’re still the same, giving whatever Max wanted.

“I’m sorry for getting angry,” he begins. “I’m sorry for stopping you from going to Renault. I’m sorry for promising that I’d talk to Christian. I’m sorry that I didn't. I’m sorry that you had to break up with Leo because of me. I’m sorry that I realized that I fell in love with you while dating Kelly. I’m sorry for the shoes. I’m sorry for getting drunk. I’m sorry for being so selfish. I’m sorry for not considering you. I’m sorry for loving you. I’m so, so sorry, [Name]. For everything.”

His words come rapidly and frankly, you don't want to hear Max like this. Max rarely apologizes. You're not used to hearing him apologize.

“Max—”

“I called, [Name].”

You freeze.

“I called so many times. Not once have you answered. Not once—” a loud sob erupts from his mouth, interrupting him. “You always come when I call.”

You close your eyes, letting out a shaky breath.

“I sent you a message,” he continues. “To wait for me. I know I’m selfish but can I have five minutes please? Just….five?”

A pause.

“Okay,” you whisper. Max’s body trembles against yours and you stand still for a few minutes,

“Hey,” you say gently, suddenly reminded that you're standing in an open space and Max is still in his Red Bull overalls and he doesn't even have his usual cap on and this compromising situation you're both in was going to be bad for Max’s online reputation once the wrong pair of eyes manage to catch sight of you. You can already imagine what the headlines would be.

MAX VERSTAPPEN AND HIS FORMER MANAGER CAUGHT HUGGING IN A GASOLINE STATION AFTER AUSTIN GP.

MAX VERSTAPPEN AND FORMER RED BULL MANAGER IN A RELATIONSHIP?

FORMER RED BULL MANAGER POTENTIAL REASON FOR BREAKUP BETWEEN KELLY PIQUET AND MAX VERSTAPPEN?

MAX VERSTAPPEN CHEATED ON KELLY PIQUET WITH FORMER MANAGER?

MAX VERSTAPPEN, FULL-TIME WORLD TIME CHAMPION, PART-TIME CHEATING ASSHOLE.

God. You can already imagine the headache splitting the entire PR team’s skulls. The world already hates Max because of how good he was at his sport. You can’t allow people to shit on him more because of you.

“Max,” you try again, tapping his forearm so he can loosen his hold on you and you can turn around. “Max, baby, cooperate with me for a bit, yeah?”

You tug on his wrist and you can't help but sigh in relief when his arms loosen a little. He’s beginning to choke you a little bit. With his arms still around you, you pivot on your heels so you’re face-to-face with his broad chest.

When you look up to Max’s face, your heart shatters into a million pieces. His tears continue to flow and violent sobs wrack his entire body, robbing him of the ability to speak and barely allowing a breath to be drawn. He’s going to hyperventilate. Fucking dammit.

“Max,” how many times have you said his name in the last few minutes? “Hey, breathe with me.”

Your hand cradles his jaw and your eyes focused on his blue ones and fuck, they’re as insanely beautiful as you remembered.

“Breathe.”

You perform exaggerated inhales and exhales so Max can match your breaths, his hands settling on your shoulders. His palms feel heavy against your shoulders and his fingers dig deep into your skin.

“I’m here, Champ. I’m here,” you assure him. “I’m here now.”

You wait until he calms down a little and when he does, your right hand searches for his, intertwining your fingers together to assure him that you’re not going anywhere just yet. Your other hand comes up to hold the area below his neck and you slowly guide him back to his car. It’s a little difficult, Max obviously has no intention to let you go, but you know how to make things work.

Max sits on the driver's seat with you standing outside of the car. He's still clinging onto your hand and you use the other hand to hold the roof of the car for support. Max stopped crying now, staring blankly at you with a sad pout on his face. His tears are now dry, staining his cheeks.

“You okay now, Champ?” you ask, never failing to sound gentle. That's what Max needs now. Gentleness. God forbid you pull a Jos Verstappen.

Max shakes his hand, making you sigh deeply. Your eyes trail to the hands, the pale skin now an angry red.

“Max,” you call his attention. He looks up at you and you have to avoid his gaze because if you look at his face, your heart hurts. “I’ll get something from the mini-mart for your burn, aight?”

He shakes his head and his grip on your hand impossibly tightens. If he keeps this up, he’s going to break your bones.

“No.”

If you were the same person that you were in 2023, you would have let Max do what he wanted. What Max wanted, what Max shall get—that’s the philosophy you lived by. But things are different now. Leo told you that you’re allowing Max to take too much from you and Max needs to learn to actually listen to you.

You’ve been taught to treat even the most minor of burns as if it’s a major burn. That's what you are planning to do right now.

“Max,” you say, a little firmer now. “Gonna grab somethin’ in the mart real quick, you stay here, aight?”

“No—”

“Not askin’, Champ,” you interrupt him. “I'm not leavin’ yet, not goin’ anywhere until I make sure you’re okay. So stay here and wait.”

You swiftly remove the key attached to your belt and force it into his palm, “Here are my keys. I’m not goin’ to drive off and leave you here, aight? Do you trust me?”

You have a feeling that this anxiety of his might have stemmed from that one incident in his childhood where Jos left him at a gas station. Fucking son of a bitch that man was.

Hesitantly, Max says, “I do.”

“Good,” you ruffle his hair, dampening your palm.

You can see he does not like what you're doing now but he does not have any choice so he sits in the car, looking as pitiful as ever. You jog up to the mini-mart, immediately going to the beverage section to grab a bottle of water and passing by the hygiene shelf to snatch a handkerchief. You go to the counter and the middle aged guy manning the register obviously does not look impressed that you’re in his shop for the third time in the same hour, which is stupid because he should be glad that he has a customer. You put everything on the counter, pulling out some bills from your back pocket.

“You happen to have neosporin?” you ask.

“Do we look like a drug store?” he retorts. You roll your eyes, toss the bills to the cashier, and grab your items without even waiting for the guy to wrap them all up in a paper bag. You jog back to Max’s car.

“Excuse me,” you lean inside the car, opening the compartment to search for a burn cream you left inside there last year. Your eyes land on his keys, stiffening when you notice that Max kept every single gift you gave him. The bead keychain from 2020, the bottle opener keychain from 2021, the clay figure keychain from 2022, and the bracelet from 2023 sway slightly, staring back at you. You shake your head and resume doing your original mission. You find the burn cream and you immediately search for the expiration date. January 2025; it’s still good to use.

You straighten, take hold of Max’s wrist gently, and roll up his long sleeves up to his elbows. You open the water bottle and tug Max’s hand towards you so he won't get water on his car as you pour water on his burn. Once the bottle is nearly empty, you apply the cream on the reddened area of his skin. Then, you use the handkerchief, which you dampen using the leftover water, to dress it.

Max is silent the entire ordeal, watching you work your way meticulously and carefully around his hand. The same meticulousness one can expect from a former firefighter paramedic volunteer.

You step back to inspect your work, but Max’s hand stretches out towards you, grabbing the hem of your jacket.

“Sorry,” he says and yet you see his knuckles slowly turning white, which makes you unsure if he truly is apologetic or not. “Just…yeah, sorry. Can you stay for a while please?”

“Have to leave soon,” you say. “El Paso’s still hours away. I have to be there by morning.”

He nods, his Adam's apple bobbing up and down, “Okay.”

“Thirty minutes, Max,” you decide. “Thirty minutes.”

You pull out your phone from your pocket to check the time and see the multiple notification bars. You type the password and direct to the message app to see the flurry of messages Max sent earlier. You have not noticed them.

max: i heard you came

max: where are you

max: please

max: can you give me ten minutes

max: just

max: please

max: wait for me

max: i’m not angry anymore

max: im begging you

max: or five minutes [name] im okay with just five

max: or even less

max: i just need to see you

“Who told you I was here?” you question, brows knitting together. There are currently two names in your head. They both start with the letter L and they both work at Williams.

“Leo called me and told me you were here.”

“Of course he did,” you roll your eyes. Logan will never dare betray you like this. You made Leo promise not to tell Max where you were in El Paso and the bitch told him where you were the moment you stepped out of El Paso. He didn't break his promise technically, but it's still a very bitch move for him to pull. You're going to have a lengthy conversation with him later.

“So you’ve been in El Paso?” he asks.

You nod.

“My grandparents’ place.”

He nods.

“Sorry about Julio, by the way.”

You sigh. God, you want to cry.

It's truly unfair how God decided to take away Julio [Last Name]. Death should happen to assholes and shitty people. To people who abuse their children every day. To people who waste years of their lifespan on nicotine and alcohol. To people who kill people. Death shouldn't happen to heroes, who risk every single day of their lives to save other people. Death shouldn't happen to Julio [Last Name], a firefighter who died saving a kid in a burning building. At least, not this early. Not until you fulfilled his dream for him.

(His last words: I don't regret doing what I did. I have kids, too. I want someone to save them the same way I did that kid if they ever get stuck in a situation like this.)

“Did Leo tell you that, too?” you hope that he didn't notice that your voice slightly wobbled.

“No,” Max shakes his head. “We—Logan and I came to Vista Del Pueblo in December. Your neighbor told us that…”

He doesn't need to finish his sentence for you to know what he’s trying to say.

You nod, “So that's why there was an article that day…”

You remember Damiano showing you the news article in his phone—AN UNLIKELY FRIENDSHIP: MAX VERSTAPPEN OF RED BULL RACING AND LOGAN SARGEANT OF WILLIAMS RACING SPOTTED DRIVING AROUND AUSTIN. You shrugged it off at that time.

“How are you?”

You turn to Max, raising a brow at his question.

“How am I?” you echo, sounding a little bewildered.

You see, Max has never asked this question. You're used to “Are you okay?” but not this. Not this question. You can easily lie to an are-you-okay. You can say yes even if you’re not, and you won't give yourself away because you only uttered one word. But with how-are-you, it’s different. It's not a question that is not answerable by yes or no. You actually have to explain how you feel. That's why Papa Julio only asked, “How are you, mija?” rather than “Are you okay, mija?” Papa Julio wants to know how your day went even if you're okay or not.

Yeah. You're definitely going to cry at this rate.

“How have you been after Julio?”

“You really wanna know?”

“I wanted to be there for you at that time,” Max confesses. “When I learned that Julio was gone, I wanted to go to you. But Leo stopped me. He said I was not what you needed at that time and I agree. I was too angry at you for leaving me. I’m glad he didn't tell me where you are, despite how painful it was. I was selfish and immature that I cared about my grief and forgot to consider yours. I reflected on my actions a lot. I am not sure how different I am now from that version of me but I think I changed a bit. So yes, [Name], I want to know, because I want to know how you felt and help you in any way I can.”

You stand there, stunned at what Max has said. And perhaps it was his sincerity or the way his determined blue eyes stare into your soul that caused the sixth domino to tip. You break into tears, a raw cry escaping your mouth. You are so fucking tired of carrying everything on your shoulders.

Max is quick to engulf you in a hug and you don't hesitate to pull him into you, pressing your face against his shoulders as you let everything out. You claw his back as if you're trying to mold himself into you. Your nose turns red, snot drips out of your nose. You sob too loud and too heavily that you can hardly draw a breath. You don't cry pretty and this is the first time you allowed yourself to cry with another person bearing witness to your fragility.

When you calmed down, you found yourself sitting beside Max, shoulder to shoulder, in the backseat of his car, playing with the drawstrings of your jacket.

“Sorry.”

“Don't be.”

“Sorry, I was just so tired,” you tip your head upwards. You can feel Max’s eyes on you. “Things have been hard since Papa died.”

“Do you want to talk? I’ll listen.”

You chuckle humorlessly.

Jesus, what did Leo feed this guy?

It feels like the roles are reversed now.

“Everybody's been takin’ it pretty hard so I'm trynna to be strong for them, you know? But I’m not that strong,” you begin. “I’m just as lost as everyone else and it's hard pretendin’ like I’m not. I’m not really sure what will happen with my life now so I wander around and do car repairs for a few folks in El Paso.”

“What happened to your dream? The job?”

“Well, it's gone,” you say, making Max’s eyes widen. “Not my time yet, I suppose. Or rather, I’m never supposed to have time. I guess I’m just not meant to be an engineer.”

“No,” Max turns to you, clasping your hands in desperation. “No, no, no. You always wanted to become an engineer. You can't just—I’ll think of something. I’ll ask Christian. I’ll ask the other teams. Renault isn't in Formula One right now but I can—”

“Max,” you smile sadly. “Let it go.”

“But—”

“Do you know what my Papa’s dream was?” you interrupt. “It’s to be a Formula One racer.”

You smile, remembering all the times you’ve seen your father watch the races on the television since you were younger. He’d wake up even in the ass crack of dawn just to watch them live. He’d be so tired after a 24-hour shift at the fire station but he’d refuse to even catch a wink of sleep until the Grand Prix broadcast is done. He always received a beating from your Mama because of it.

“He saw Senna in the newspaper and decided that he wanted to be like him, too. Sadly, Papa never vibed with a steering wheel so there was no future in that industry. He's always so disappointed in himself, sayin’ he can do the most unhinge shit at work but can't even drive a car. When Damiano and I turned five, he brought us karting. I could tell he was disappointed that Damiano didn't share his love for racing and I hated seein’ him sad so I learned to love karting. He signed me up and I did my best to win. I think I was good. Good enough to make him proud of me. Papa looked so happy when I won my first trophy. He cleaned it every week.”

You smile fondly at the memory.

“Then, shit happened and I have to stop. Papa looked even more disappointed than me that I had to stop. It hurts. Disappointment from your parents, I mean, even if I know that it's somethin’ beyond my control. I figured that if I can't be a racer, I’ll work in a pit stop. That's close enough. When I told him that I got accepted into USC and how I wanted to be an engineer, it was the proudest I have ever seen him since I won my trophy. I was livin’ his dream. I applied for Red Bull and Renault because those are Papa’s favorite teams and the rest is history.”

You pause.

“He’s never got to see me become an engineer,” you choke out, wiping the stray tear that fell from your eye with the back of your hand. “It was his dream. He always had his dreams broken and I was gonna reach his dreams for him but he’s gone before I can do so. Now, I’m so lost because I realized that I was shapin’ myself to become an extension of Papa and now that he's gone, I am an extension of no one. I was reaching for dreams that I don't own. I’m so tired and I’m so lost, Max.”

Max stares at you sadly.

“I should have talked to Christian sooner. Fuck, I hate myself for not talking to Christian. Fuck, why was I so selfish?” he presses the ball of his palms against his eyes in frustration. You chuckle, shaking your head.

“That’s okay,” you say. “I’ll find my way.”

You look at the scenery outside of the window. Night has fallen. You should have left for El Paso by now.

“I need to go,” you say, heart heavy.

“So soon?”

Max is panicking again.

“Jesus, Champ, calm down,” you pat his shoulders.

“Will I see you again?” Desperation laces his question.

“Dunno really,” you shrug.

“Can you wait for me?”

Your brows furrow.

“I’ll retire by 2028. No, that's still long. 2027. Ah no—2026? Can you wait for me? I—” Max’s hand trembles. “I love you. I love you, [Name]. I—I love you even before Kelly. I can’t. I can't lose you.”

The world stops.

“I am stupid, I am selfish, and I think I’m asking too much. If you can just wait for me, I’ll—I can even retire next year if you think it's too long—”

“Hold up right there, Champ,” you stop him. “You're not retirin’ early.”

“If you want me to, I will.”

You sigh in exasperation.

“Max,” your voice is low. “That’s your career. I’m not gonna—Jesus, Max don’t retire, okay? Not even for me. Retire only when you want to.”

This man is just…

You don't know if you want to choke him or kiss him.

“I want you to have me, [Name]. I… I want to be with you, to love you, and if retiring is the only way I can do that then I will,” he says. “I love you.”

You purse your lips.

“I love you, too, Max,” you confess and now, your chest feels lighter now that you've said it out loud. “But not now, I can't love you like this. I’m too… I can't pursue a relationship with you right now. Not when…”

“It's not our time,” Max nods. “I understand.”

He really did change.

“I want to find my way through life first," you tell him.

Max smiles and he pulls you again in a hug. He has tears in his eyes again and he sniffles, chuckling at himself for crying again. He pulls away from the hug slowly and hands you your keys.

“See you around?"

“See you around.”

You exit the car and you notice that your heart feels lighter now compared to the time you left Monaco even though you are doing the same exact thing—leaving Max to go home.

At the end of 2023, you grace the paddock with your presence—your signature YSL heels is back on the tracks. You wear pants now, instead of the corporate pencil skirts, matched with a Prema Racing polo shirt. The label at the back indicates: AERODYNAMIC ENGINEER. By the end of 2024, you are promoted to the strategy team. By 2025, you become a race engineer of an up-and-coming racing superstar and you kept the job position until now.

The world didn't end just because your Dad died. It took you a while to realize that your Papa didn't own your dreams. It was always yours to begin with. He just played a part in inspiring them.

Max Verstappen became the 2024, 2025, 2026, 2027, and 2028 WDC, marking history as an eight-time consecutive champion. He retired after the 2028 season and disappeared from the face of the Earth. He had stopped going home to his penthouse in Monaco, had put his private jet on sale, and had cut ties to his father, Jos, who was very disappointed that his son had retired too early in the sport. Max retired willingly—he had achieved more awards than most of his seniors and it's time to give room to the younger ones. Rumors say that he had established a racing program somewhere in Belgium. Charles Leclerc, Max's friend, refuses to update the media regarding Max's whereabouts and only says: "He's happy. Don't worry."

Years later, a thirteen-almost-fourteen year-old girl named Emiliana Julia Verstappen, racing under the American flag, become the youngest driver in history to join the ranks of the F1 academy and later, she becomes the youngest driver to ever drive a Formula One car, racing for Scuderia Ferrari as second driver, at only seventeen and a hundred and fifty days old, overthrowing Max Emilian Verstappen, retired eight-time F1 WDC, whom the world has not seen since his retirement, from the list.

#max verstappen x reader #f1 x reader #formula 1 #formula one #max verstappen #max verstappen x you #f1 imagines #fanfic #manager!reader #mv33 x reader #mv1 x reader

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junkdyke · 7 months

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That Time I Hooked Up With A Tumblr Mutual

Ok. Let me start by saying this is not a callout post, and this should be read as a humorous story, with some takeaway lessons at the end. Please enjoy my story of my weird ass encounter with a Tumblr mutual.

Part 1: The Backstory

Alight so boom. I had just returned home from a trip where I met a different Tumblr mutual. That trip was great but didn't end up going to plan, so long story short, ya girl was horny. I had never really had a one-night-stand or sought out a solely sexual hookup, so I started thinking maybe I could try it out, see how I like it. And through the sheer power of manifestation, that opportunity presented itself.

I was scrolling Tumblr and one of my mutuals posted asking if anyone was in (my area) and wanted to hang out. Mind you, I have never spoken to this mutual before. No DMs, maybe like 1 or 2 comments through tags and that's it. But, most of my moots are far as fuck, so when I saw she was near me I was like oh ayo, I'm free! Why not, I had nothing else going on! So I reply, and she DMs me.

So she introduces herself, we'll call her Chicle for reasons I'll get to later in the story lmao. Anyway, she gushes a little bit, saying she's been too shy to DM me and that I'm a really cool tattoo artist mutual, I say she's cute and seems cool, and she asks if I've ever been to this particular mall. I say I have and if she wants to cruise the mall with me. She says yeah I'd love to cruise the mall and "if I like her vibe, then maybe we can do something more fun." I say I'm down, she gives me her number.

So here is what I'm envisioning. We'll meet up at the mall, walk around and talk, get to know each other, have some laughs, get a snack, it was a Friday so maybe we could go out to like a bar or go dancing, and then maybe after that, possibly make-out or even have sex! I am not opposed to having sex after a first date if I'm really vibing with the person and if we've been talking for a bit before. Girls, this is not what happened.

Part 2: The Meeting

I get ready, and I drive to the mall. I park, we text on where to meetup and I head over to the Gamestop. I see her at the counter, go up and I'm like "are you buying Pokemon cards?" She starts laughing, she says "I didn't want you to see this!" I'm laughing, I told her it's cute, she finishes paying and we walk around. Cute start and thennnn it all starts to go downhill from here.

As we are walking out of the Gamestop, a minute and thirty seconds into meeting this stranger, she wraps her arm, not around my waist...but around my ass. And pulls me close. I'm instantly uncomfortable by how close this gesture is. She starts cooing in my ear about how she's "so glad I'm not a catfish" and "if I like her vibe because she really likes mine". We met not even 5 minutes ago, I have not had time to evaluate any vibes! But anyway! She asks if she wants smoke 🍃 so I agree, and we go outside, right across from where we just were.

I get to take like 1 hit from this pen, she then steps close to me and says "I'm so glad you're real" kisses me and squeezes my ass. I again feel the need to emphasize that at this point, it has still been less than 5 minutes since we've met, and we have exchanged about 10 messages only a couple hours prior. This is a stranger to me. ANYWAY.

We go back inside, she asks if I wanna walk around, I agree. We chat for a short bit of time, before we go to the food court. I wasn't hungry, so she got some food and we sat and talked. I had made some mention about my past and she wanted to know more so I'm like "okay, I'll give you my lore while you eat" so I basically tell Chicle my life story. Afterwards, we go to walk around more and I start trying to ask her questions so I can get to know her more. It becomes very apparent that she is not interested in getting to know each other lmao. I ask what she does for work, and what she's interested in, and she tells me she's interested in getting into (something animation related) and i'm like "oh ayo, that aligns with what I do" and start trying to get more info cause i'm curious, annd I get just the shortest fucking answers. Ok.

She ends up making a comment about how I'm probably more experienced than her, and I'm like "oh really? Well how many people have you been with?" and Chicle asks "are we counting online?" Now, there is nothing necessarily wrong with this...but it does become more clear on just how "online" this person is. Anyway, she has only been with a few people, never had a partner. It becomes very clear as to why she may have never had a partner.

Part 3: Inappropriate Behavior

We are walking around the mall, stopping in a few stores to look at stuff. Chicle is walking next to me and I am still trying to invoke conversation. But Chicle is not interested in conversation, because instead, she is deliberately and blatantly staring directly at my tits. What I mean is, mid-walking, she is at my side, craning her head to the side to make it incredibly clear that that is what she is doing. I straight up ask "are you...staring at my tits?" she confirms as such, and says something about her being a dog. The dog thing will come up again.

Chicle is at different points, holding me, kissing me, and saying various suggestive things. She grabs me and whispers in my ear "do you want to go back to my room" and I nervous laugh and say "uhhh, we'll see!" At another point, she says "you're so small, you want me to manhandle you and throw you around?" and I again nervous laugh. We're like in Hot Topic, and she start trying to makeout with me and grabbing my ass and says "you're making me so hard"(we'll put a pin in that) and I push her away and say "not in public". I can do a little PDA but this is a lot, and at this point I have known her for about 40 minutes, maybe an hour.

Continuing on, as we're walking through this crowded mall, she drapes her arm over my shoulder and starts grabbing my boob and trying to pinch my nipples, which I immediately pull away from and again say "not in public". Chicle again says "do you wanna get out of here and go back to my room" and I'm questioning what exactly she means, because the phrasing is a little weird. "what do you mean 'your room'?" and she says "I have a hotel room" so I'm a little confused cause I thought she lived in the area. She does.

"i got us a room"

Ya'll, this bitch preemptively booked a MOTEL ROOM without even asking me.

At this point, she has asked multiple times and each time I nervous laughed and said "haha maybe, we'll see, ehhh we'll see" To any normal person, my body language was extremely clear that I was uncomfortable. And again this is not a callout post, she is not a bad person, and everything that ultimately happened, I did consent to. But I will not sugarcoat the fact that this behavior was definitely inappropriate harassment, and there was absolutely some pressuring with the continuous asking. But as I mulled it over, there were 2 reasons I ultimately decided to agree and meet her at that motel.

I was craving intimacy

I had never done something like this before so..fuck it, let's do it for the plot.

And so, she gave me the address, we got in our respective cars, and we met at the motel.

Part 4: The Motel

We go to the room, put our stuff down, and I go to use the restroom. I'm thinking "oh shit, this is weird but alright, let's see what happens"

I come out of the restroom, wash my hands, and she comes over and we start kissing. Already it's fucking weird because the way she is kissing me is so goddamn fast, it's like someone inhaling a meal because they think it's gonna run away from them. Now idk about ya'll, but I like a slow, deep kiss. So already it's a mismatch, but whatever. She lifts me onto the sink, despite the weird kissing, it's hot. She has some really minty gum in her mouth, hence the name Chicle. Put a pin in that.

After a bit, we go to the bed, and I keep saying "how did you get me here" because honestly, I'm not fully comfortable, it's just a weird situation for me and I'm surprised I agree to it. But agree to it I did, so we get on the bed, and keep going. Now, even though she does not have much experience, she's not bad! But...I can tell there's certain things she's doing that I've seen. Or rather, read. Whew lad.

As we're getting into it, my clothes are coming off, she's saying "You're my favorite Tumblr mutual. I can't believe this is what my favorite Tumblr mutual is into." I don't even really know what to say to this because quite frankly, mentioning social media in bed in any capacity is kinda fucking cringe. But it just gets worse.

So, she's spitting on my pussy. And I, personally, have a strong aversion to spit. It's something that I tell anyone that is a potential sexual partner, but it this case, we obviously did not have a prior talk about our sexual boundaries. In this case, I'm like "okay whatever as long as it's just there" but I quickly say "hey uh, just please don't do that in my mouth or i'll throw up" lmao. She's like "Oh okay sorry sorry". But then at some point, without warning she smacks the FUCK out of my pussy, and I'm so taken aback I immediately say "UH DON'T DO THAT" and she again apologizes and says

"Oh sorry, you know I had to try that one. Like that Tumblr post, you know the one."

Ya'll, everything this bitch is doing, she is referencing posts from Tumblr. She is referencing the sexy fantasy butch/femme text posts from Tumblr and she is referencing them out loud. In the middle of real life sex.

She goes on to reference more posts, and the worst part is I know exactly the one's she's talking about. "Mutuals to lezz out with" etc etc, it's so fucking cringe, and she tells me about how she started wearing more of a certain article of clothing after I reblogged a picture of her in it and how embarrassed she is to admit that (I thought that was kinda cute actually) anyway

She's still going way too fast with like all her movements, I tell her to slow down and relax and I think at this point I mention how she did not have to do all that PDA shit from before. She says "well you know, on my Tumblr I do say I'm a dog" and then uh, she starts barking. 💀 literally starts going "woof, woof" and I tell her to s t o p. Jesus fucking christ.

Anyway, after mentioning Tumblr and calling me her favorite Tumblr mutual way too many fucking times, I'm on top of her. Mind you, this whole time, I'm kinda in and out dissociating, just due to how not fully comfortable I am with this. But ya know, I'm still going for it. Her shirts off, she has really cute boobs, and then I notice a really fucking huge bulge in her pants. And I fully dissociate. Not gonna lie, I started feeling really panicky, because straight up, I was not prepared for this. Physically, I'm still touching her, but my mind is fully disconnected, and I'm thinking "oh fuck. When she said 'you're making me so hard' was she being literal? I don't know if I'm comfortable with this. Should I tell her I want to stop? But I don't wanna hurt her feelings. Should I just take it? Well no, I don't really want to...maybe I'll just say 'hey is it cool if I don't touch it?' I mean, she's cute so ehhhhh let's just see what happens!" SO. We continue on.

We flip and she's now on top of me. She references another fucking Tumblr post, and says "do you wanna suck on this lesbian cock?", unzips her pants and pulls out...this MASSIVE transparent strap on. And I'm like oh, it was fake LMAO. Then I say "...yeah, so that's not going in me"

She ends up taking it off, I don't even know how the fuck she hid it in her jeans that entire time, and we continue on. Around this point, I'm starting to feel pretty spent, she did some other things like opening up my pussy to stare at it and describe the color, whatever, I'm kinda done and I just wanna cuddle. So we cuddle for a bit and again, it's physically nice but it's just so weird because she is SUCH a stranger to me that I can't get fully comfortable. She starts trying to start up again and I'm just not really in the mood anymore. She keeps playing with my nipples and typically whenever I'm touched in a way I'm not digging, I'll just take their hand and move it away as a silent but pretty clear way to indicate "no". But uh, I had to do that like 4 times with her before I verbally say "hey, please stop" and her response is "why" 💀 like wdym "why" bitch, cause i said so. I'm kinda surprised by this response so I start to say "Uhhhh, it's...kinda specific" and she goes "oh okay, sorry sorry".

So, honestly, I kinda just wanna go home but I don't wanna be mean and just take off. But there's also no way in hell I'm sleeping over in this motel room. So, I suggest we go out and maybe go to a club or something and she's like "uh, no. I don't like going out" 💀 like damn, maybe you should spend less time on FUCKING TUMBLR AND TRY GOING OUT IRL but whatever, instead we just go get food and bring it back to the room.

Part 5: What Could Have Been

We got some burgers, and she wants to open the Pokemon cards. We do, that's fun and cute, and she asks if I wanna keep some of the stickers that came in one of the packs.

Then she tells me that she had went to the library and checked out a book on tattoos since "she knows I'm a tattoo artist, and thought we could flip through it together." And I genuinely think this is such a cute fucking gesture, I think it's really sweet, and it frustrates the fuck out of me because of what this could have been.

I told her that she did not have to do all the PDA, it was a lot and it was excessive. She is not apologetic about it, and says that the reason she was like that was because "she needed me to know what her intentions were and that this was not just a 'friendly' meeting." so I reiterate that she did not have to do ALL OF THAT just for me to know that. And she just insists that in the past, girls have treated her like just a "bestie" so she needed to get her point across. Now call me old fashioned, but you could have just verbally fucking communicated "hey, i'm really attracted to you" and I would have caught the fucking drift. But okay!!

She asks me if I have any knives because I guess femmes tend to have a knife collection. I say no. And she fucking pulls out this huge ass lethal switchblade thing and is like "this is mine!" and i'm like oh god, this is it, I'm gonna fucking die in this motel room. But she doesn't kill me, she just shows me the cool knife and then puts it away. I have known this person for like 4 hours.

So, we flip through the book, and it's funny and cute, but she keeps trying to kiss me and instigate, and i'm just not interested, I just wanna flip through the book and go the fuck home. And that's pretty much what happens, we finish, I'm like "aight, ima head out" but

before i do

we end up making out again and then I think she was helping me put my shoes on?? she's on her knees in front of me and...she asks me to spit in her mouth. Once again, I have a major aversion to spit and i really, truly, do not want to spit in her mouth. But she says please...so I do like a half assed spit and hope it's good enough. She asks me to try again....so I get an accumulation and spit in her mouth, and she swallows it and i am so so sad about it 😭 and I finish getting my shit and I go the FUCK HOME.

Now here is what frustrates me about all this. Physically? This girl is extremely my type. I like the way she dresses, she has really nice arms, she has a cute face, she's really fucking attractive. She's interested in getting into the animation industry, which I'm currently also working on getting into as well. We could have talked about that and really had a cool discussion on what kind of projects she wants to do and what style she works in. She likes video games, we could have talked more about what games we like. She got this tattoo book because she knows I'm a tattoo artist, and I think that's really fucking cute. There's so many non-sexual aspects that could have made this a real fucking date where I got to know this person, and feel comfortable, and then we could have had really great sex because straight up, the girl was good. She may have learned it from Tumblr, and some of it was weird, but for the most part? She was damn good, especially for only having limited experience. This could have turned into something real! But NO. Chicle, instead, wanted to grope my tits in front of families an hour into meeting me, and made no effort to really let me get to know her in any capacity whatsoever! And it's not like she wanted this to be just a one-night-stand, because she had told me she was looking for a gf and asked me what I was looking for!

It just could have been so much better than this weird ass situation. And after the fact, she texted me and I answered a couple times, but when the following morning she said something to the effect of "it felt so good having you on my lap" I just never answered. Because prior to this, there was absolutely no established relationship, friendship or otherwise. And I could not see anything moving forward, because we couldn't backtrack into the aforementioned "could have been". I considered communicating how I didn't actually feel super comfortable with how things went, but I ultimately just decided to not reply. Shitty on my part, but again, there was no prior anything. And we just never spoke again, we remained mutuals, and so I never talked about this because uh, obviously she would see it. But since she blocked me, heyho now you all get the story!

Part 6: Epilogue

Now, the reason I decided to call her Chicle (Spanish for Gum)

So, while the nice minty gum was a nice gesture, her spitting that gum juice all over my vagina resulted in me getting a yeast infection💀 No more hookups.

So what lessons did we learn!

It's important to talk about sexual boundaries before having sex with someone!

Internet fantasy is not real life! Don't just do shit because you read about it in a fucking internet post or saw it in porn! (Especially when that person doesn't even make those kinds of posts, i don't reblog most of those for a reason)

Don't chew gum before going down on someone

Communication overall is really important for setting up any foundation, even if it is just a one-night hookup!

(yes this is ok the RB cause I spent forever writing this and I do genuinely think it's a very funny story. Sometimes ya just gotta do things for the plot so you get a good story out of it. No regrets, and my pussy is all healed up lmao)

#decided to make this it's own post oops #wlw #lesbian dating #lesbian #storytime #dykeposting #mine #ok to rb

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everlastlady · 6 months

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Bloody Legend: Mammon X Reader 4

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✰- Author's Note: Hello! I'm really glad that you guys are enjoying this silly little story. Also I made a yandere Mammon bot on character ai so if you want the link to that let me know. Also the Juggling Is Cool song is stuck in my head 😭 Anyway remember to eat a meal or a snack, drink some water, get some fresh air, take your medicine, and remember that you are loved. If you loved this story remember to comment, click or tap that heart button, reblog with tags, and blaze if you can. Always remember to support your local writers. ♡♡♡

✰- Story Parts: Part One | Part Two | Part Three

✰- Story Contains: Mammon, Striker, Verosika,Asmodeus, & Rosemary (oc), Spoiled Reader, Romantic Dinner, Shopping Spree, Mentions Of Reader's past, Mentions Of Mammon's Past, & Cuddling.

✰- Posted: 11/2/2023

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" Alright, (Y/N) is looking much better just make sure that they take those vitamins every day and are properly eating. Some fresh air should help. I know they are your mascot but a break from the spotlight should help. A lot of people end up dying from overworking themselves especially celebrities. " Rosemary said. Looking back at your door and at Mammon who had been looking upset because he knew it was his fault that you were sick. " I understand thanks doc, I'll be sure to send you your payment. " Mammon said. " Good, I can use it for a romantic dinner for me and my boyfriend. But remember no work for (Y/N). " Rosemary wagged her finger at Mammon and before the plant demon woman could walk away, Mammon thought about what she said about a romantic dinner with her partner, maybe Mammon could set up a romantic dinner with you. " Doc, wait! " Mammon snapped his finger and with green smoke along with a honk appeared in front of, Rosemary who coughed and waved away the smoke. " Yes, your lordship? " She asked. " How would you go about asking someone on a romantic dinner? " Mammon asked using one of his arms to rub his chin. Rosemary smirked and adjusted her glasses. " Why? You got someone you wanna ask out? " Rosemary snickers as Mammon didn't want to say who. " Just answer the question and I'll pay you twice the amount I owe! " He said looking desperate for an answer. " Calm down, just simply ask the person you don't need to do something grand gesture to ask them out for dinner. " Rosemary said while closing her eyes and then opening them. " Listen my boyfriend is a bouncer at Ozzie's when I asked him out for dinner, I just asked him and we had a good time. " Rosemary smiled and blushed. " It was nice, just the two of us. I didn't do anything grand so just go for it. Anyway I have to go I hope (Y/N) feels better. And whoever you ask on that date has fun. Maybe ask Asmodeus for advice. " Rosemary walked towards the elevator before vanishing.

Asmodeus? Asmodeus!? There was no way he would ever ask Asmodeus for love advice especially after what happened at the clown off. Mammon would rather give an orphanage half a grand before going to Asmodeus for love advice. He would just take Rosemary's simple advice. Mammon didn't want to take you to a restaurant. He could set up dinner here in the dining room. He could have the cooks make up delicious meals and the two of you could talk, just enjoy each other company. But he didn't want this to seem like a date or that he had feelings for you. Even though he did, he wanted you to feel the same way; so he decided to use this dinner to impress you. Mammon walked towards your room and opened the door. He saw that you weren't in bed but could hear singing coming from the bathroom while water was running. Whether you weren't a good or bad singer. Mammon always loved hearing you sing. It made his heart flutter your singing was something he first heard when you would change in your dressing room. Mammon waited for you to stepped out the bathroom, once you did you we wearing an oversized green sweater that had Mammon's M on it and some black stretch pants. You almost jumped seeing him. " Mammon, sir, uh hi did you need something? " You asked. Mammon shook his head and walked towards you. " You and me are having dinner tonight, to talk and forget about work. So where something nice! " Mammon pinched your cheek. " I'll be back soon, I have a meeting with Lucifer, I can't wait to see my old friend; remember to take your vitamins! " Mammon honked and vanished.

You stood there for a moment thinking about what Mammon had said. Dinner with him tonight? You smiled softly; that actually sounds nice - You decided to call up Verosika and ask if she wanted to go shopping with you. To which the succubus agreed. Last time the shopping was cancelled due to you getting sick. But you were feeling better. You decided that you would buy a beautiful outfit for this dinner with Mammon, so when walking outside you saw Verosika's limo. Her driver opened the door. Getting inside you not only saw Verosika but Striker who was grinning at you. " Well howdy (Y/N), Mammon knew that you would be shopping so he called me up to protect you as your new bodyguard, thanks for giving him, my card. Sorry about what happened to your old bodyguards, may they rest in peace. " Striker said while bringing his hat to his chest. Trying his hardest not to laugh. " Thanks. " You smiled and sat down in between him and Verosika. " Are you feeling better (Y/N)? " Verosika asked as the limo drove down the streets of Greed. You nodded your head. " Much better, Mammon even asked to have dinner with me tonight, to wear something nice. " You said while looking down at your phone. You didn't notice that Verosika and Striker had exchanged looks of disgust. Verosika cleared her throat. " Mammon hasn't been working you or anything else? " She asked. " No, he's been making me rest a lot and having people bring me medicine, water, tea, and food. Sometimes I catch him checking up on me or that the old blankets have been taking off my bed and replaced with new ones, it's weird how he's been acting but it's also nice. " You sighed softly with a smile.

Both Verosika and Striker were shocked about this. When the limo finally stopped at the mall. You got out, Verosika looked at Striker. " So now he's concerned about their well-being? " Verosika said. " I'm sure he's only concerned because if they stay sick or die, he'll use money. Once they are 100% better he'll make them over again like cattle. " Striker grumbled and got out of the car. Striker made sure to keep close to you and Verosika so that no crazy fans run up to you. You looked down at the green credit card that Mammon had gifted to you a while back. Mammon aleatory spoiled you because he always wanted you to look nice and because he wanted you to feel like you could rely on him. You went all your favorite shops while sipping on the strawberry smoothie that Verosika bought for you. The two of you hadn't noticed that Striker killed fifteen people that were creeping up on you and Verosika, either trying to kill you guys or kidnap. Striker pulled out a new gun and saw how you tried on different green or white outfits. You soon came out wearing a white outfit mixed with some pastel green. " What do you guys think? " You asked while twirling. Verosika almost dropped her smoothie as she was blushing and Striker without looking shot another creep but his eyes stayed on you as he also blushed. The two of them didn't say anything which made you frown. " It's not good? " You looked down.

Verosika shook her head quickly and stood up. " No no, you look beautiful sweetheart, I'm sure Mammon will think you look sexy! " Verosika said looking at you while blushing. " And if he doesn't then he's blind. " Striker said. " Because you look absolutely stunning. " Striker said. Both their comments made you blush. You decided that you would buy the outfit, you were having fun with Verosika and Striker. The three of you continued to shop. Verosika had bought you pink rose pendant and Striker had bought you a cowboy hat since you kept taking his and wearing it. " (Y/N) you should hit up one my parties whenever Mammon doesn't have you underneath his thumb. " Verosika said leaving the mall with you. Letting out a small laughter. " That would be fun, I always see your parties on Voxtagram. " You said always wanting to attend parties. But you really didn't because Mammon had you attend other parties. " Great! My birthday is coming up, I'll be sure to send you an invite in the mail and just in case Mammon doesn't let you, I'll see what strings I can pull. " Verosika held your hand getting into the limo as Striker followed behind. " Wait till you see the bull riding, I always stay on the longest. " Striker smirked. " Don't forget, I'm also from Wrath, I did a lot of bull riding on my grandparents farm when I was sixteen. " You smirked as Striker laughed. " Alright, darlin', we'll see~ " Striker leaned back. The limo dropped you back off at Mammon's palace; you wave and say your goodbyes to Verosika and Striker. Your ears felt hot thinking about the fun shopping spree you had with Striker and Verosika.

Making it back inside the palace. Mammon still wasn't back from his meeting with Lucifer. But you could smell something delicious from the kitchen. One of the servants told you that you weren't allowed in the kitchen because dinner was going to be surprised. So you went to your room and put away everything you bought. The necklace that Verosika bought you, went in your jewelry box and you hung up the hat that Striker bought you. You hoped that you could go to Verosika's party. You really enjoyed their company. You kept out the outfit that you would wear to dinner with Mammon. Feeling tired you decided to take a nap so that you would feel more energized. You laid down on the bed and fell asleep. Meanwhile at the meeting Mammon had to ignore Asmodeus as Lucifer talked about the process of Hell. He thought about the dinner date he had with you. After the meeting ended Mammon stood up ready to leave only for Asmodeus to say something. " Already replaced Fizzarolli? " Asmodeus said still holding that same look of angry at Mammon. " Yeah, what about it? You have time to spend with him, I found someone better than him, someone who brings me more money than he ever did. " Mammon said glaring at Asmodeus, hoping that he wouldn't say anything harsh about you Beelzebub and Lucifer watched as if this was a drama show. " No, you found someone else to exploit, and when they get tired of your bullshit; they'll leave you too. " Asmodeus walked off humming, the humming irritated Mammon because Asmodeus was humming the song that Fizzarolli sung at the clown pageant.

Mammon sat in the limo sneering, he was upset at what Asmodeus said. He wasn't exploiting you, he was helping you. He cared about you! Asmodeus doesn't know what he's talking about. Mammon took a deep breath, he should be happy, excited because tonight he was going have a lovely dinner date with you. When he reached the palace. He already had the servants help him get ready and look all handsome just for you. The dark green tux with the gold that he had tailored so that he could look good for this night. Mammon asked the servants to help you get ready and meet him in the dining room. The servants woke you up and helped you get ready. You felt a pit of nervousness sitting in your stomach. You weren't the only one feeling this way so did Mammon. He would mess with the items on the table. Having the servants bring in better flowers or change out the candles. Even had some of the dishes switched out. He even requested fresh strawberries in the bowl. Once you walked in Mammon was blown away. You looked absolutely majestic. Mammon was speechless. " (Y/N) love, you look absolutely fucking beautiful! " Mammon stood up and pulled out your chair. " Sit sit. " He pushed in your chair once you sat down. And then appeared in his own seat.

The dinner with Mammon was full of laughter as he talked about his past. " When I first met Asmodeus, I hated him on day one. He thought he was better because he was the sin of lust. Always talking about how more people have that sin. Which is a big fucking lie. Bee, she's alright I know that me and her would always get high and eat some good shit. We still do, Luci is a real good friend of mine, I do believe I'm his favorite. I remember when I first became a sin of greed. Seeing what people will do for money and power. Was chaos a circus of chaos then when the humans started dying and finding themselves in the greed ring. They still hadn't changed their ways. " Mammon took a bite of his chicken. " News team always ask us sins if we will get a queen like Lucifer has his gal Lilith, or will we ever get a partner like how Bee has that hellhound, I forgot his name. Now that Asmodeus admitted to loving Fizzarolli. " Mammon said annoyed. " People assume that I'm next. " Mammon looked at you. " Have you ever thought about dating or ever getting married one day (Y/N)? " Mammon asked while drinking some of the golden liquid from the glass. " I'm not sure, I'm always busy with the career you gave me that I never consider marriage or dating, but eventually one day I would like it. " You smiled enjoying the meal in front of you. Mammon looked at you for a second. " Well, you got all this status and fame. That anyone would die to date you, but don't let people with you for that though; because you are a bloody legend a beautiful, smart, funny, and... Kind legend. " Mammon clears his throat. " This is boring! Wanna go watch a movie? " Mammon asked and stood up.

You smile. " Sure. " You stood up taking the bowl of strawberries with you. As you followed Mammon into the living room; sitting down on the couch. Mammon put on a nice comedy movie, a nice romantic comedy; you sat down next to him eating the strawberries from the bowl. Mammon kept looking at you from the corner of his eyes. Seeing how focused you were on the movie. He was trying to figure out how to cuddle you. He didn't want to make things awkward or weird. But his eyes widened when he felt you lean against him. He looked down to see that you looked tired. He remembered what Rosemary had said, just go for it. So Mammon pulled you closer and cuddled with you on the couch. This felt like a dream, this felt nice. Mammon's heart patters, against his chest, palms sweaty, and head dizzy. You eventually fell asleep cuddling Mammon, who watched the movie but kept you close. Once the movie was over; he picked you up and carried you to your bedroom, laying you in bed, he looked down at you. Before walking away, you grabbed his hand. " Please stay. " Mammon turned around seeing you look at him while holding his hand.

───────────────────✦─────────────────────

Mammon's Bloody Legends Taglist:

@g0dwat3r

@stinkykittypet

@lucasisstupid

@pink-puff-bird

@universallyweaselwobblermuffin

@lizzywizzyeatsart

@queenfishie

@a-library-of-old

If you weren't tag its because when try to tag it says " No Blogs Found " which means you have to turn on tags or Tumblr isn't letting me tag ya. Anyway if you want to be added or removed from the Taglist let me know

#helluva boss #helluva striker #helluva verosika #helluva mammon #helluva mammon x reader #helluva mammon x gn reader #helluva x gn reader #helluva x reader #helluva fanfiction #helluva fandom #helluva season 2 #everlasting writes🪻#bloody legend

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chaisshitposts · 7 months

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Hi I am rabbit🐇 anon and I wanna say that Idk why but i m not understanding the pych-k method like i don't get what PPL say especially when ppl tag that post I just don't get it so can you tell step by step how to do pych-k method for void.

P.s we r same age lol

oh yeah??? cool! glad to meet a fellow adult 🐇 anon🤝 and that's ok, I'm more than happy to explain it for ya in simpler terms, it be like that sometimes so I get it. yer mind is like a computer, yer subconscious is the motherboard of info, and while ya do psych-k ya are basically downloadin' an entirely new program with new codin' and all that jazz with the affirmations ya choose, then ya save that affirmation in yer motherboard.

psych-k is about usin' yer entire brain, both hemispheres simultaneously, and how to do it is super simple. when you're just startin' out with it, I always recommend that ya start off with your left side (it doesn't really matter what side ya start with but some people do better when they have clear instructions)

left side -> ya wanna start off with crossin' yer left ankle over yer right ankle, set yerself a five minute timer and then start it, immediately afterwards you're gonna cross yer left wrist over yer right wrist and then interlock yer fingers. for a visual aid, check out this video -> it's not very long and I hope it'll be easy for ya to follow while ya are doin' this pose, you're gonna close yer eyes and repeat yer affirmation for the duration of yer timer. with this pose, ya more than likely will start to feel an influx of thoughts that may try and argue with yer affirmation. it's important to invite those negative thoughts and just let them flow, let them happen, and just keep repeatin' yer affirmation over and over. what yer doin' is teachin' yerself somethin' new until these resistant and negative thoughts disappear. i should also mention that sometimes ya may not experience any negative thoughts at all, which is fine too, just keep affirmin' for the five minutes. some folks also report that they feel physical symptoms when doin' psych-k, which is also normal, and it's perfectly okay if ya don't, that's also normal, everyone is impacted differently.

ya hold this posture for the entirety of yer five minute timer. once you're done you're gonna 'save' yer progress by uncrossin' your ankles and wrists and then press the finger tips of both yer hands together (kinda like when villains are havin' their evil scheme moment, y'know) just make sure all yer fingers touch each other and hold it for 10 seconds --- like below BUT MAKE SURE ALL YER FINGERS TOUCH TIPS 🙏, no palms need to be touched, you're not prayin'.

once you're done, you're gonna repeat the entire process for the right side where ya cross yer right ankle over left ankle, and yer right wrist over yer left wrist, hold that pose for five minutes with yer timer and then save it again with the pose mentioned above.

ideally, this'll completely change whatever limitin' belief ya had with the affirmation ya chose after a single session, BUT sometimes it can take more than one single session of psych-k which is also completely normal especially when dealin' with something that's been deeply embedded in yer mind for such a long time. think of it like a stubborn program in yer computer that you're tryna get rid of, sometimes it can take a few tries to completely wipe out the old programming.

somethin' else that can happen is that psych-k did work but does not instantly reflect in your 3D which can sometimes make people think it didn't work so they fall back into old thinkin' and start reaffirmin' the old story. h o w e v e r, ya can easily find out if psych-k worked through the use of muscle testin'. I'll provide some reference posts for muscle testin' below which can also be used in combination with any and all methods of manifestin'.

muscle testing applied kinesiology

psych-k is just a form of focused, super affirmin'. it can also be used to calm yerself down just from simply crossin' your ankles, many people do it unconsciously without realizin'. i recommend that the next time ya have a moment of panic, anxiety, or any other negative feeling, ya should try crossin' yer ankles and see what happens. 🕵️

if ya need anymore clarification, just let me know!!!

#— chai's asks. !! ~#— 🐇 anon. !!~#psych k #psych-k

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writingforstraykids · 3 months

Text

Pretty Boy- War of Hearts preview

Pairing: Chanlix (mention of Minchan | Minsung | Y/N)

Word Count: 4532

Summary: Watching his best friend and former lover Minho getting married breaks Chan's heart. Leaving the wedding early he gets pulled over for speeding by a surprisingly handsome officer...

Warnings/Tags: angst, fluff, friends to lovers to friends, minsung is getting married, chan gets a little drunk, bodyguard!chan, officer!felix, mafia boss!minho, smut, sub!felix, dom!chan, strangers to lovers, anxious!min

A/N: Soo I didn't plan on posting anything of the mafia series I've been working on yet but I thought I could use this chapter since it's very Chanlix centered🤭 I hope you guys like the first glimpse at the series (yn at the beginning only here). Hope you like it miu @miuracha 💕💕

do not repost, translate, or plagiarize my works in any way here or on other platforms. ©️writingforstraykids 2024 -

You sit down with them, taking Felix’s previous place, and look at Chan curiously. “Now I really wanna know how the two of you met. Felix isn’t usually like this.”

“I wasn’t either,” Chan giggles softly and rubs his face. “Fine, but I won’t tell you all the details,” he giggles, thinking back to the night he met Felix.

Four years ago

Chan watches the newly wedded couple in front of him, keeping up the fake smile he has been wearing for hours. Minho smiles brightly, kissing Jisung for the hundredth time tonight, and pulls him in close as they sway across the dance floor. The golden ring on his hand shines brightly beneath the lights, and so do those beautiful brown eyes he fell in love with all these years ago.

Minho's happiness is his top priority, especially after those last couple of years. Chan stopped counting the nights Minho clung to him in feverish nightmares, searching for him to hold him when he felt like falling apart. Now he's happy with someone else. It shouldn't matter. It should be enough to see him smile again, to be so purely in love and finally feel at peace. It should be, but it isn't.

Chan's heart breaks with every kiss he watches. It shatters with every loving gaze Minho gifts to Jisung and not him. Hearing them exchanging vows and tying the knot was by far the worst moment of his life since he lost his parents. He takes another sip of his drink and presses his lips together tightly, getting a little emotional. He needs to get out of here. Chan pushes himself off his chair and grabs the keys to his motorcycle.

"Channie, hyung," Minho's soft voice stops him, and turning around, he can see them coming toward him. "You're leaving already?"

"I'm not feeling so well, I'm sorry, Min," he lies smoothly.

"Oh no, what's wrong?" he asks worriedly, eyes scanning his body for possible signs of discomfort.

"Nothing, I'll be fine," he waves him off.

"Chan," Minho frowns at him.

"Min, sweetie," Jisung chimes in gently. "Let him go if he needs to rest, you have enough other bodyguards around."

"Yeah, but this is my best friend," Minho argues softly, not knowing how hurtful those two little words are for Chan. Jisung gives him a meaningful glance before excusing himself to go and talk to a friend of his. Minho gives him a quick kiss, and Chan is gone when he turns back around.

Chan races down the stairs of the wedding venue Minho rented and blindly fumbles for his keys as tears burn in his eyes. He reaches his bike and grabs his helmet, hands shaking as he unclasps it.

"Chan!" Minho calls out for him, rushing down the stairs and coming to a halt in front of him. He frowns seeing the tears in his eyes. "Oh, Channie, that bad?" he asks worriedly.

"I'm just feeling really sick right now, that's all," he says quietly, lowering his gaze to the floor.

"Let me drive you home then," he suggests.

"Min, this is your wedding," he argues. "You can't just vanish."

"I can do whatever I want," he snorts.

"Wouldn't be fair to him, would it?" he asks, and Minho's smile falters.

"He'd get it. You're my best friend, and if you feel like shit, it's my responsibility to take care of you."

"No, Minnie, it's my responsibility to take care of you. You're supposed to be in there with your husband-" he chokes on the word and swallows hard.

Minho gently grabs his hand, his ring burning against Chan's skin. "Channie, dear," he says softly. "I just…be careful, okay?"

"Of course," he nods quickly.

"Promise me," Minho asks gently.

"Min," Chan sighs, finally wanting to get away from this.

"Promise me you'll be careful. I couldn't handle it if something happened to you," he says, the grip around his hand growing stronger.

"I promise I'll be fine," he says, carefully easing his hand out of Minho's. He looks up and smiles at him bravely. "Go and have fun, alright?" he asks, and Minho nods hesitantly, searching his eyes.

He watches him climbing onto his bike and grabbing the helmet. He can tell something is very wrong, and he doubts it's what Chan says it is. Chan wouldn't leave his side because of that, he never does. "I love you, you know that right?" he asks timidly, and Chan freezes in his movements for a short moment.

"I love you," Chan answers just as timidly, and his gaze softens a little, meeting Minho's wide, confused eyes. "You look beautiful," he tells him gently, and Minho blushes almost instantly. "Thank you," he whispers.

"Come here," Chan sighs, and Minho steps closer. He hugs him tight and smiles as Minho holds onto him firmly. "You're doing great. I'm proud of you, Minnie," he says softly.

Minho's hold on him tightens. "Please don't go?"

Chan pulls back, cupping his cheek out of reflex. "You'll be fine."

"I feel safer when you're here," he confesses anxiously.

Chan shakes his head firmly, leaning in and planting a short, light kiss on his forehead. "You'll be fine," he whispers, and pulling back, there are tears burning in his eyes all over again.

Minho watches him, stunned, as he puts on the helmet and grabs his keys. "I'll see you tomorrow?"

"Of course," he promises, putting on his gloves.

"It's you and me against the world, right?" he asks timidly.

Chan feels like laughing at that. Minho just got married to Jisung but still thinks it's them against the rest. "Always, kitten," he says softly before starting the engine.

Minho stands still for a moment as Chan races off and nervously fidgets with his suit. He wonders if Chan would be alright and get home safely. Minho flinches softly as someone wraps their arms around him, hand resting on his chest.

"Hey there," Jisung says gently, kissing his cheek. "You're alright?"

"Yeah, I'll be fine," he nods and squeezes his hand, leaning back into him.

"He'll be okay," he tells him soothingly.

"I'm not sure this time," Minho shakes his head, deep in thought.

"He always is, he has to. He'd never leave you here if he didn't think you'd be safe," he points out, and Minho hums agreeingly. "Come on now, we have a party to celebrate," he says, gently pulling him with him.

Chan blinks away his tears, racing down the streets rather aimlessly. He doesn't want to go back home yet, he'll feel even lonelier in that big house without Min there. He has no other place to go, though. His parents are gone, there aren't any siblings, and Minho is all he had his whole life. The only constant variable in his life got ripped away for good. The safe house is over an hour away and full of memories. He can't escape it.

Chan speeds up a little, the wind pulling at his jacket, but he doesn't care. He'll just keep on driving all night and stay away from home for a bit. He notices the red light too late and curses to himself softly, that could've gone very wrong.

A loud siren behind him startles him a little, and glancing back through his mirror, he notices a police car getting closer. "Oh, for fucks sake," he curses and stops at the side of the road.

Felix parks behind him and hops out of the car. "That fucker really got some nerves," he whispers to himself, making his way over. "Excuse me, Sir, you-" he starts and loses track of his thoughts as the guy takes off his helmet. He meets a pair of soft and incredibly sad chocolate orbs he feels like he could drown in if he maintains eye contact for too long. Dark curls frame his face effortlessly, and god, those full lips. A quick glance down his body makes him suspect he's quite fit, and Felix scolds himself for getting all dreamy about a member of the mafia. It must be him.

"Yes, officer?" he asks patiently, resting the helmet on his thigh.

"You, uhm, you were speeding. And you ignored a red light," he tells him, frowning softly at his amused expression.

"I'm aware of that, thank you," he nods.

"That's not a kind reminder," Felix protests softly. "I just pulled you over because -."

"I don't get pulled over," Chan says calmly, and judging by Felix's stunned expression, he has no clue who he's talking to. "Ever heard of Minho Lee?"

Felix's eyes widen and he nods quickly. "Yeah, I did."

"Well, guess what, I'm pretty important to him. So remember this," he says, vaguely waving at himself and the motorcycle. "And don't pull me over again."

"I don't think I can-" he stammers.

Chan sighs heavily and reaches out for him, pushing aside his jacket gently to check the name tag. "Great, another fucking Lee who's ruining my day."

"You ruined that by yourself, Sir. I just reminded you of the law," Felix frowns, almost a little offended.

"The law's debatable," Chan shrugs and squints his eyes at him. He takes in the sight of him in his uniform and has to bite back a smirk, meeting his very confused brown eyes. Dark hair falls around his face, highlighting the freckles on it. He looks cute. " You're new here, aren't you?"

"Actually, I've been living here for my whole-."

"At the police force, darling," Chan huffs, and Felix's eyes widen, a soft blush creeping up his neck. Oh.

"I'm-Yes, I'm new," he nods quickly.

"I can tell," he says and smiles at him fondly. "Still so eager to do things right."

"We should," Felix nods quickly, subconsciously straightening his uniform.

"But they don't. And you won't if you want to survive this job," he nods thoughtfully. "You'll notice soon enough. Try staying away from Han's men, they're horrible to cops."

"Okay," he nods, wondering why the hell he is listening to this crap. "Sir, are you drunk?" he asks after a moment of silence.

Chan laughs out loud, and it's the first time today. "I'm not joking, stay away from the Han family. They're dangerous. It'd be a shame if they'd mess up that pretty face of yours," he says, and Felix's blush deepens. "But to answer your question, yes, I had a little too much."

"Then that's another reason you shouldn't be driving," Felix points out kindly.

"I have to get home somehow," he shrugs, staring up at the sky, slowly changing colors as the sun begins to set.

"You have no one to pick you up?" he asks, feeling pity for him.

"My best friend got married to another guy today. I have no one else," he tells him, not really sure why the fuck he'd be telling that to some random police officer.

"That's why you're drunk and driving so reckless," he hums understandingly. "You're heartbroken, aren't you?"

"What if I was?" he asks and watches him observantly. His brown hair shines beneath the setting sun, eyes sparkle beautifully. Chan can't help but think again about how effortlessly beautiful Officer Lee is.

"Then I'd feel sorry for pulling you over…but on second thought, not really. There's no use putting yourself at risk because someone hasn't found you fitting for themselves," he says very gently, observing Chan's eyes. "Maybe you're not the right person for him, but I'm sure you'll find your missing piece one day."

"Well, thanks for the advice, Officer Lee," he snorts and once more checks him out. Oh, fuck it. "When does your shift end tonight?"

Felix glances at his watch. "In five minutes," he tells him.

"May I take you out for dinner after? Make up for the trouble I caused you?" he asks smoothly, and Felix's eyes widen before he gathers himself quickly again.

"Purely that?" he asks, and Chan raises his eyebrow at him.

"You're bolder than you look," he smirks. "Not really, no."

"Well, then skip the politeness and take what you so clearly want," Felix announces, not without blushing heavily.

Chan sees right through him and nods to himself. "If you let me," he nods reluctantly.

"Please," Felix nods, growing a bit shy. He crosses his arms behind his chest to hide his hands shaking.

Chan looks at him, amused. "I don't know if you're naive or touch starved to get into bed with some stranger, but I'll take it."

"I know very well who you are, Mr. Bahng," he says, and surprise flashes in Chan's eyes. "You're the head bodyguard of Mr. Lee, and that best friend you've been talking about is the very same person. You're in love with your boss."

"Huh," Chan laughs stunned. "And that doesn't stop you from climbing into bed with me?"

"That's what makes it exciting," he corrects him, and Chan smirks.

"I believe your five minutes are over, dear," he says calmly, and Felix hums softly. "Keep up, alright?" he asks, putting his helmet back on.

"You bet," he grins.

Felix gets onto the motorcycle behind him, wrapping his arms around him to steady himself. They decided to park the car back at the police station to avoid raising suspicions, and Chan kept his helmet on as Felix did.

"Hold on tight," Chan tells him, and Felix hums, agreeing. He starts the engine and drives off with him. He knows Minho would be pissed knowing he brought a police officer back home, but he couldn't care less. He just wanted to forget and feel good for a night.

Chan soon parks in front of the mansion and hops off his bike, taking off his helmet. Felix does as well and smiles at him shyly. "Come on in," Chan chuckles and leads the way.

Felix follows him through the front door, looking around curiously. Chan takes the helmet from him and puts it aside, reaching into a small closet drawer next to the door. He pulls out a piece of soft silk and gives him an apologetic smile. "He'd kill me if I'd led you through the house with your eyes open."

"Oh, okay," Felix nods gently, swallowing nervously as Chan steps closer. Their eyes meet, and sparks ignite between them. "Can I kiss you?" he asks politely.

Chan chuckles softly and cups his face, pulling him into a gentle kiss. A soft sound escapes Felix's lips, and he grips Chan's suit jacket, pulling him close. Chan's arm snakes around his waist, and he lets him enjoy that feeling. It has been years since he kissed someone and he only realizes now how much he had missed it.

Felix takes a few steps back, pulling him with him until his back hits the wall. Chan braces himself on the wall, caging him in, and the moment Felix parts his lips to catch his breath, Chan's tongue slides into his mouth. A low groan escapes him as their tongues slide against each other sensually. He reaches up, burying his hand in those thick curls and arches into him. Chan's playing with his hair, pulling at it as he deepens the kiss.

Neither of them notice the front door opening until someone clears their throat. "Channie?"

Chan flinches heavily and pulls back panting, turning to look at him. Minho stands there, still in his wedding suit, and watches him with wide eyes. "Min, you're back already?"

Felix connects the dots and realizes the man in front of them is Minho Lee, one of the most important people in town.

"I-uh, I came to check on you, but you seem to feel fine again," he says, nodding slowly. He looks a little hurt, realizing Chan hasn't felt sick. "So you're…you're not feeling sick?"

"Not anymore," Chan answers, and he isn't even lying. He hasn't been feeling exactly well the whole day, watching the love of his life marrying another man.

"Mhm, okay," Minho nods quietly before his eyes fall onto Felix. "And that is?"

Felix bows gently before him, dark messed-up hair falling into his face. "I'm Officer Felix Lee, Sir," he introduces himself. "It's an honor to meet you."

Minho frowns at him softly. "Not really, there's nothing special about me other than my mother's legacy," he says and looks back at Chan. "Why are you bringing a police officer back home without my permission?"

"Since when am I asking for permission?" Chan gives back and glances at Felix. "Felix and I just met, we've decided to have some fun tonight."

Felix smiles at the way his name rolls off his tongue. "You can cover my eyes now, by the way," he chimes in gently. "I've probably seen too much already."

Chan smiles softly and nods, pulling the silk from his pocket. He steps behind him and soothingly squeezes his shoulder. "Close your eyes, pretty," he says and locks eyes with Minho as he covers Felix's eyes. "Don't you have a husband to get back to?" he asks, more coldly than he intended to.

"I-I guess I do," he nods, not fully understanding why his heart hurts and his stomach cramps with jealousy as he watches Felix. He just got married; for fucks sake, why is he so focused on Chan? "We'll talk about this later, Chan."

"Nothing to talk about, you won't do much different tonight," he shrugs and wraps his arm around Felix's waist, pulling him in. Felix leans back into him, breath hitching as Chan places a kiss just below his ear.

"Why?" Minho asks, barely audibly pointing at Felix. "You're usually not like that."

"You broke my heart, that's why," he says, and Minho's face falls. "It's nothing new, and I won't stand in your way if you're happy with him. But let me deal with my side of emotions the way I prefer."

"I-I'm sorry," he whispers, tears brimming his eyes.

"No, you're not," Chan says quietly. "Because you don't have to." He steps in front of Felix and lifts him up after a gentle warning.

Felix wraps his legs around his waist, arms around his neck, and nudges his nose against Chan's clumsily. He leans to his ear as he plays with the base of his hair. "Need you so bad, Channie hyung," he whispers, not seeing the beautiful smile breaking across Chan's face.

"Don't worry, sunshine, I got you," he gives back lowly and exchanges a last glance with Minho before carrying Felix up the stairs.

"But I am sorry," Minho whispers to himself, anxiously fidgeting with the sleeves of his suit. His chest tightens a little, and he sucks in a sharp breath. He never wanted to hurt Chan like that. Never. Had he been faking to be happy for him for years now?

Chan gently sets Felix down as they reach the corridor to his room, taking the fabric from his eyes. Felix's soft eyes flutter open and meet his. "No wonder you fell for him, he's incredibly handsome up close," Felix states, making Chan chuckle, surprised.

"Stop talking about Min, alright?" he asks gently and cups his face. "He's not important tonight."

Felix nods kindly and fondles down his sides almost hesitantly. "Where's your room?"

"Just over there." Chan gently caresses his cheeks and pulls him into a kiss. Felix's hands rest on his hips as he kisses back fiercely. They get lost in the feeling for another bit before Chan takes the lead and walks them to his room, never breaking apart. Chan kicks the door closed behind them and turns the key, trapping Felix between the door and his body.

"Can I?" Felix asks, reaching for Chan's suit jacket. Chan hums gently, and Felix brushes the jacket off his shoulders, locking eyes with him as he starts opening the buttons of his shirt. Felix hesitantly lets his hands roam his skin once he's done and bites his lower lip hard at the thought of the rest of him. "Fuck," he breathes out, a little stunned, as Chan grabs his neck and pulls him in again.

Chan pushes his thigh between his legs, smirking as Felix's jaw drops. "Feels good, pretty boy?"

"Uhuh," Felix nods dumbly, pressing down against him needily.

"Go on," he encourages him and reaches for the first button of his uniform. "I'll start taking that off for you while you do."

Felix doesn't need a second invitation, grinding down against his thigh with a low groan. He watches as Chan unbuttons his uniform and shivers with need as Chan's fingers brush against his bare skin in the process.

Chan notices and glances at him curiously. "You haven't been touched in a while, have you?"

"Not really," he confesses, blushing heavily. "It's a bit of a weakness of mine," he adds, glancing at him through his lashes.

"How much time do you have?" Chan asks, and Felix swallows audibly.

"For you, all night," he breathes out.

Chan hums softly and picks him up, carrying him to his bed. He lowers Felix into the pillows and climbs onto the bed, hovering over him. "May I make up for the time you missed then?"

"Please do," Felix nods shyly. He watches with interest as Chan gets comfortable between his legs, bracing himself next to his head. His lips plant tiny kisses down his jaw before they land on his neck. Felix melts into the sheets beneath him as Chan starts kissing his neck, leaving small bites all over it, slowly moving down to his collarbone. Sinking his hand into his curls, he whines softly as Chan's lips travel further, tongue lapping at his nipples.

Chan has no idea how long he stays like that, exploring Felix's body with his tongue, teeth, lips, and hands. The man beneath him writhes in the sheets, soft, helpless sounds tumbling from his lips. Chan's face is buried between his thighs by now, having worked up his way both of his legs. Felix's body is littered with reddish marks by now and covered in sweat, worked up from Chan's pleasurable touches. Looking up, he smiles at the sight of him. His dark hair sticks to his face, brown eyes blown with lust, lips swollen and parted. "Enjoying yourself, pretty?"

Felix hums, agreeing, and bites his lip hard as Chan gently eases off his boxers. His head falls back as Chan teasingly licks up his shaft and massages his balls with his hand. "Ch-Chan," he chokes out.

"Get on your hands and knees for me, will you?" he asks, and Felix nods, eager to please him and finally get what he wants. Felix turns around, knees buckling a little. Chan reaches for his bedside table, grabbing a bottle of lube and some condoms for later. He spreads Felix's cheeks with his fingers and licks up between them. A guttural moan falls from Felix's lips at that, pushing back the moment Chan's tongue pushes against his hole. Chan switches between tongue and fingers, working him open slowly. Felix's arms collapse as he locates his prostate, and Chan bites back a moan at the weak sound leaving his lips.

"Channie - stop," he pleads quietly, face buried in the pillow. "Fuck, please," he whimpers.

"What's wrong?" he asks, fingertips brushing against his prostate once again.

"I'm gonna-" Felix squeezes his eyes shut, body shaking as Chan massages his prostate so perfectly. It's too much. Too much after all those teasing and loving touches before, too much after being touched so right after all this time. Felix's body tenses up, and he releases into the sheets beneath him with a weak sound. His face flushes red with embarrassment, and he hides in the pillow. "Fuck, sorry."

Chan leans down, kissing his spine, and shakes his head. "Nothing to be sorry for."

Felix frowns softly and peaks at him timidly. "But I came without asking for permission."

Chan blinks at him, heart melting at the sincere apologetic look on Felix's face. "I told you I'd make up for that time you missed. I wanted you to feel that good."

Felix's blush deepens. "So you're not mad?"

"No," he tells him with a kind smile, and Felix's heart melts. That's a new one.

"I think I'm ready for you now," he tells him with a sheepish smile. "Can I take care of you now?"

"Okay," Chan nods gently and lets Felix guide him onto his back. He watches him curiously as Felix straddles his lap, eyes fluttering as Felix wraps his hand around his so far untouched dick. Felix flicks his thumb over the tip and strokes him a few times before handing him the condom. Once Chan is ready, he pours some lube into his hand, stroking Chan once again and getting into position. Chan's face contorts in pleasure as Felix slowly sinks down on him.

Felix braces himself on his chest, moaning softly as he tries to adjust to his size. He experimentally moves his hips and allows himself to relax and sink down deeper. "Feel so fucking full already," he groans deliciously.

Chan moans, relieved once he's buried fully inside of him, and rests his hands on his hips. "You're okay?" he asks, watching Felix observantly.

"Yeah," he nods, panting a little. "Just need a moment."

"Take your time," he says gently, rubbing his hips soothingly.

"Okay," Felix says to himself, lifting his hips and sinking back down on him after a moment. They both moan at the movement, and Felix repeats it, Chan's hips meeting his this time. He braces himself on his chest and works out a rhythm that feels good for them both. Felix moves eagerly on top of him, moans falling freely from his mouth by now.

Chan beneath him has his head thrown back into the pillow, jaw growing slack at the tightness of Felix around him. After all, it's been a while for him too. "Fuck, Felix," he groans softly.

Felix tries to angle his hips a little differently to hit his prostate but doesn't fully succeed. After a few tries, a frustrated whimper leaves his mouth, and Chan glances up at him.

His breath hitches, seeing tears brimming Felix's eyes, and he has to bite back a groan. Wow, he didn't know he had a thing for that. "You're okay, pretty boy?" he asks gently, and Felix shakes his head, whining softly.

"Need more," he admits, and Chan understands, gently patting his hips.

"Let me help," he says reassuringly, and Felix does, letting him angle his hips a little differently. Chan thrusts up into him, and Felix rewards him with a deep, relieved moan, nails digging into his torso. Chan's eyes roll back at the way Felix clenches around him, moaning obscenely loud and shaking on top of him. "Fucks sake," he breathes out, pounding up into him desperately. Felix slams his hips down against him, their moans growing louder. They chase their high together, pushing each other over the edge soon after. Felix collapses against him, and Chan lazily thrusts up into him still, rubbing his back soothingly.

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After a moment of silence, Felix glances at him with a shy smile. "Again?" Chan kisses him fiercely as an answer, flipping them over in the process. Again.

Taglist: (Please let me know if you want to be added to/removed from the taglist!)

@kai-lee08 @atinyniki @mal-lunar-28 @lilmisssona @aaasia111 @galaxycatdrawz @kthstrawberryshortcake @channieaddict @soullostinspaceandtime @malfoygalaxies @rebecca-johnson-28 @sundownimup-1 @aalexyuuuhm

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emmitaaa4 · 3 months

Text

Minor HOFAS spoilers ig?

The Walmart bonus chapter just leaked and good lord some people need to be for real. I'm so tired of people picking and choosing evidence.

So you're telling me that *gasp* Azriel's shadows seem to dance when he hums?? they react to sound/music?? no way. people from all sides of the fandom have been saying that for years (and use it for different arguments), and looks like ppl are still tying anything they can to feed their ship--which is fine but at least make it somewhat accurate.

The above is the last page of the Az/Bryce/Nesta chapter, and just as a refresher, this is the oh-so controversial phrases from the Az bonus chapter:

"(...) one of his shadows went out to dance with it (gwyn's breath) before twirling back to him. like it heard some silent music." and "(...) he could have sworn a faint, beautiful singing followed him. could have sworn his shadows sang in answer."

I'm confused, which is it? Was the shadow's reaction to her breath & the singing he heard all metaphorical, thereby hinting at a mating bond between gwyn & az (as in "music between souls")? Or was it rather azriel's shadows reacting to a literal sound coming from someone who has arguably been hinted at having some voice/song-related abilities? Because if it is the first, then this new HOFAS excerpt is completely unrelated. Well unless Azriel has a mating bond with himself? pleaseee make it make sense I beg. And if the second is true, it would mean that for someone to be able of making his shadows dance, they'd have to have similar powers as him... its just gonna fuel the lightsinger theories (which btw approx 5 ppl are saying means that gWyn is eViL) so this literally changes nothing. nada. absolument rien.

Oh also.

"He says no partner right now, aka NO FUCKING ELRIEL. ELRIEL IS DEAD." (no hate to whoever posted that btw)

He literally rushes out that answer. Idk about you guys but to me the poor man still seems internally dead over the whole mate existential crisis, which as far as we know was left with him wondering "what if the cauldron was wrong". Sidenote but if I understood correctly, this all happens 2-3 months post acosf and Bryce spends ±5 days in Prythian, so it is very likely that it is all set during Acotar 5, and that the events of HOFAS in general are happening while Az is separated from the other MC (ie. the acotar5 FMC).

Regardless of all I just said, I am going to ask people once again to be for real. cause this whole chapter Azriel keeps glaring at Nes when she is about to reveal too much info, so WHY would he be mentioning Elain (or literally anyone he cares about) to someone who he is said to be highly suspicious of? make it make sense x2

Almost forgot. Last thing.

"Azriel said that Nesta killed the King! He didn't credit Elain!"

... no? for context, this is what Az said:

See my second point above. He told Bryce exactly what Nes did, and nothing more: she beheaded Hybern. We could speculate about what his look at Truthteller made him think of... but tbh I'll leave it to someone else cause perso I dont really see the point.

I am getting tired guys... guess who finally understands what "fandom fatigue" is.

-----quick edit-----

I don't mean to sound hypocritical by tagging ships, cause tbh i dont even wanna put acotar ship tags to this, mais bon c'est la vie et j'en peux plus. this fandom is kind of a mess. Goodnight loves ♡

#hofas #hofas spoilers #azriel #anti gwynriel #elriel #azriel shadowsinger #elain archeron

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hajihiko · 1 month

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Hey. So, I saw your Chiaki & Fuyuhiko comic that I like to call "Look on the Bright Side" (since it didn't have an official name in the post itself), and I loved it. I loved seeing Nanami & Kuzuryu interact with each other with the former comforting the latter on Peko and complimenting on how brave he was to save his friend, the scene between Fuyuhiko & Peko during the latter's execution, and then the scene of you making a throwback to your DR3 rewrite from your Talky Talky Tuesday content where the DR2 cast witness Human Chiaki's death and chose not to help her because of how awful Junko's influence on them was. It was heartwarming, bittersweet, and terrifying all at the same time, and as @/self-in-dulled-gent put it in their reblog of the comic, the 4th & 5th panels depicting your DR3 rewrite is a cool and visceral indication of how far the DR2 cast had fallen into despair. Heck, both the comic & the rewrite even serve as inspiration towards my au/rewrite/reimagine of DR3's Despair Arc & how Junko corrupts the DR2 cast into despair. So, thank you so much for the inspiration. I really appreciate it.

With all that in mind, I have some questions I wanna ask you regarding both the comic & DR3 rewrite, if you don't mind.

May I have your permission to do a review on your DR3 Rewrite post for my Advian Reads & Reviews content (which in case you're curious about, AR&R is reading review series where I read something, like fanfiction for example, while also doing a review on it at the same time, giving my thoughts on whatever I'm reviewing as well as potentially even sharing my own stories)?

Will you ever showcase the bonus panel of the rest of the class witnessing Chiaki's death that you mentioned in the comic's tags?

Who is the 5th person on the right between Kazuichi & Hiyoko in the 4th panel (I'm assuming it's Sonia based on the hairstyle, but I thought I'd ask for some confirmation)?

Will we ever get to see the dialogue of Chiaki not resenting Hajime/Izuru for not helping her you also mentioned in the comic's tags?

Follow up on that previous question, do you think it's possible that we might also get to see if Chiaki resents her classmates for not helping her, or if she would also get it with them like she did with Hajime/Izuru?

How exactly does Junko kill Chiaki in front of her classmates? Does she still have her go through her execution like in canon, or does she kill her in a different way, and if so, then how? I ask because I saw Nanami had blood coming from her eyes & mouth (making it look like Junko literally pulled her eyes out), there's blood on her hoodie & left thigh, and she appears to have been stabbed on her right side.

And those are my questions. In regards to gaining your permission to review your DR3 rewrite, if you do grant permission, great! I'll be sure to credit you and give you a shoutout too if you do. And if you don't, then I'm content with that and will understand and respect the reason behind your refusal, whatever that reason may be. Feel free to respond back to me whenever you get the chance. Thank you and have a wonderful day/afternoon/night. 🤗💕❤️🧡💛💚💙💜💖💕🤗

that's one heck of an ask so I'm using a readmore:

Thank you! I remember that comment hehe I'm really glad people like it

1: sure! Just know that I'm like, you know, just a fan and a hobbyist and not even really a writer so I'm not saying my rewrite is more right than anything else!

2: the bonus panel was actually everyone else's deaths (in SDR2) since they all sort of died alone, too. But it didn't feel relevant enough, I prrrrrrrrobably don't have the sketch anymore

3: yep that's Sonia

4: I'll be totally real i don't remember what I was thinking there at all. Sssssorryyyyyy

5: I think Chiaki, if she got to see the events of SDR2 as the AI, wouldn't resent her classmates so much as feel sorry for them and be disappointed. At the same time though I think she might be shocked at what they're capable of. Maybe she can't help but be a bit bitter, who knows. Hajime/Izuru is a different deal since that guy literally got his brains scrambled, can't really blame him. (sort of like deleting all the save data, maybe?)

6: the blood and amounts of it was more about the drama lol. But I thought the obstacle was like, a little too fantastical, not serious enough, so in my rewrite she straight up beats Chiaki to death with some kind of instrument. I think the image of Junko doing something so realistic (and slow) while everyone watches passively is even worse.

Thanks for asking beforehand! 💙

#not an art

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n0v4t33z · 12 days

Text

The Syndicate - Chapter 8 : Complications & Whiskey

Pairings: Choi San X Female Reader, Park Seonghwa X Female Reader, Ateez X Female Reader

Genre: Lots of angst, Romance, Crime Fiction, Psychological Drama

Word Count: 15.9k

Tags/Warnings: For Mature Audiences, Mentions of Illegal activities (i.e Kidnapping, extortion, assassination etc.), flirting, kissing (yk that cheesy stuff couples do) Mentions of San's past lover being not so cool. (Not edited properly, I'll come back to it when I can)

Nets: @newworldnet

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!

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Author's Note 💌: Hi! It's been a while since I updated this story, unfortunately I had really bad burnout and kind of struggled writing this chapter. Luckily one of my readers reached out to me which really motivated me to finish this chapter. The beginning is a little bumpy but it gets better! Like always I hope whoever reads this enjoys this chapter and if you didn't keep it to yourself! Again, thank you for remaining patient! (It's 2 am and I'm tired but I still wanna post this rn because I need to get it off my hands asap so I can work on the next chapter) - N🌙

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How did this happen? How did he get my number? Did he bug the hospital room somehow? Maybe Chris’ phone? Fuck. There was a long silence of me trying to process what just happened then Captain Lee continues “I was just calling to let you know you’re more than welcome to come back to the police force.” My blood runs cold causing me to slightly stutter “So how’d you get my number?” He chuckles which gives me a horrible case of my whole body feeling cold “Ah, don’t worry about it Detective I have my methods.”

I nervously laugh and my grip becomes increasingly tight on my phone while I carefully look around making sure no one was watching. Making sure "he" wasn't watching. “Ah well, I’ll think about it Captain but I was just hoping you keep my anonymity since Aurora Syndicate is currently out looking for me.” I’m hoping he doesn’t suspect anything “Oh yes, Detective Bang told me earlier and don’t get me wrong I’ll grant it for you but I’ll let you know that I’m also aware that you know I worked with The Obsidian Dragon. So naturally, if you tell anyone I’m afraid I’ll have to get rid of you. So to keep tabs on you, you’re coming back to the police force whether you like it or not.”

I put my hand on my forehead and push my bangs back and hold back tears “What do you mean Captain? Why am I being forced into this? This is why I disappeared, to distance myself from this. I can't go back.” Captain Lee clicks his tongue a few times and says “Well, I’m sure you do know investigating these Mob bosses will get you killed so you should know that once you step into the world of corruption and ghost money your only way out is death whether you’re involved or you’re investigating it.”

He isn’t wrong, every single word he’s saying is right. I got myself into this mess and now I’m stuck. The only words that manage to leave my mouth are “Okay then, when do I go back?” I’m going to regret this. I could hear the smile in his voice “Anytime you want, preferably on Monday but don’t worry you’ll be doing desk jobs until you’re cleared. or until I feel you're good to go” I silently nod then I say in a very hushed tone “Alright, see you then Captain Lee.”

I hang up and clench my phone in my hand trying to blink back tears. I can’t cry here. I wipe away the stray tears before I buy the groceries. Once I've paid for them I put my phone on factory reset and throw it away into a trash bin outside the grocery store and head back to the tattoo shop. This is not good, I'm worried as to how he got a hold of my phone number. I didn't even give it to Chris. I'm terrified he probably knows more than what he leads on.

When I arrive to the hideout I notice everyone was still asleep so I stand in the dark kitchen and silently cry for a few minutes. I know everything will change after this. They’re all going to stop trusting me, not that they trusted me much anyway but what worries me the most is San. I might as well enjoy the calm before the storm.

Once I start cooking I notice Seonghwa sleepily rubbing his eyes and says “Hey, good morning no wonder I smelled sauteed meat and garlic, you’re in the kitchen.” I smile and nod “Yes, you’re spot on. I decided to cook for you guys since your cook isn’t here. I’m afraid it won’t be as good though.” Seonghwa raises his hand and shakes his head “Nah, it can’t can’t be worse than Hongjoong’s cooking. At least what you're cooking smells edible so I’m sure it'll taste just as good as it smells.”

He washes his hands and walks over to me “Need a hand?” I shake my head “Oh no you don’t have to, I was hoping you guys wouldn’t wake up until I was finished” He pats my head “Hm, I’ll help you. I’m awake so I might as well make myself useful” I giggle “Alright, please peel the potatoes?” He nods “Yes, ma’am” after we prepped and cooked everything I exhaustedly sit on the couch then I space out.

I want to tell Seonghwa but I’m scared he’s going to get upset. How do I tell him? Seonghwa soon follows and sits next to me and looks over at me waiting for me to say something. Worriedly he says “y/n? Are you okay?” I look over at him “Hm? Oh nothing I just have alot on my mind as of recently. A Lot has happened.” He nods “I agree, that attack from the feds hit us hard but don’t worry. Everything will fix itself eventually.”

I sigh and reach over to nudge Seonghwa’s arm “Hwa, I need to tell you something. I know I need to tell San right away but I’m scared.” He furrows his eyebrows and looks at me with a huge concern “Did something happen?” I hide my hands under my thighs “Captain Lee called me out of nowhere when I was grocery shopping this morning and he told me I have to go back to the police station again to keep tabs on me or else he says he’s going to take me out. I honestly have no idea how he even got a hold of my phone number, I had no choice but to say yes. I fucked up. I’m so sorry.”

I bite my lip to keep myself from bursting into tears while he silently stares at the ground for a moment then he cautiously looks back at me “No, no. This isn’t your fault, but you do have to tell San. This isn’t good at all. ” I nod “You’re right, this can’t wait can’t it? I was going to wait until everyone finished eating. Forgive me please don’t tell anyone else about this I’ll tell San myself.” I get up trying my best not to start crying in front of Seonghwa. Before I even have the chance to walk away he stops me tugging on my hand so that I turn to face him. He looks up at me from his seat "Remember, everything is going to be okay even if it seems like there's no way out of it." I force a smile and nod "Right, thank you for being such an amazing friend Hwa." Seonghwa slowly lets go of my hand and nods. "Always." I'm grateful to have a friend as caring as Seonghwa, someone who will comfort me and reassure me when i'm in doubt. I just hope one day i'll be able to return the favor.

When I open the door to San’s room and slowly close the door behind me. I carefully sit down on his bed and gently shake him “San, I have something to tell you.” He quietly hums and sleepily turns to face me trying to blink away his sleepiness “y/n? What’s wrong? Are you okay? You’re awake?” I shake my head trying to hold back tears. I’m so scared. He sits up and grabs my hand and gently kisses my knuckles “What’s wrong?” My lip slightly quivers “I have to tell you something. It’s something kind of serious.” He sits up and gently rubs the back of my hand with his thumb “Well, whenever you’re ready angel eyes.” I tighten my grip on his hand and put my other hand over his and take a deep breath then silently exhale “Well, Captain Lee called me and said I have to go back to the police station again or he’s going to kill me and whoever else knows about him working for The Obsidian Dragon and that he was the true reason why The Phantom died.”

San stays silent for a few seconds then in a low tone he responds “Why?” I stare at his hand then I look over at his body language and I could feel how angry he is right now which is what scares me the most because I know how impulsive he is. As much as I don’t want to look at how angry he is I look up at him meeting his eyes “He wants to keep tabs on me.” He lets out a long sigh and gently kisses my forehead “I promise you’ll be safe.” I look into his hypnotizing dark brown eyes “So you’re not mad at me?” His demeanor quickly changes and gives me his cute dimpled smile “Hey, why would I be? This isn’t your fault at all.” Part of me felt like it was, I feel like a burden now that I know Captain Lee is unknowingly threatening San with me.

“I don’t know, I just feel like somehow it was my fault because I told Chris about Captain Lee being corrupt. Despite that I know deep in my heart that Chris would never say anything.” San’s smile disappears and raises his eyebrow “Are you sure? How do you know it wasn’t him?” I bite the inside of my lip second guessing my previous statement now because of his serious demeanor. “Well, because I know him and he always keeps his word no matter what. That includes secrets. He'd never put me in harm’s way, he’s always protected me so it can’t be him.” He lets out a quiet sigh “Babe he’s a cop what do you expect? He’s going to open his mouth if it benefits him. Especially now since you no longer work at the police station that lead is probably a huge opportunity for a promotion.” I shake my head “No, he’d never do that especially not if it ended up hurting someone.”

He looks at me with a straight face almost like what I was saying is a bunch of nonsense “I’m sorry, I love you but I don’t trust that partner of yours.” I frustratedly put my hands on my forehead “Hear me out, when I told Chris I specifically told him to ask Captain Lee not to release the news of me being alive and to grant me anonymity. Which yes, Captain Lee acknowledged and said he’d agree too if I went back to the station but another thing I told Chris was that Aurora Syndicate was after me and that I needed my anonymity because of that. Captain Lee didn’t know that and he never once mentioned it until I said something about it so if Chris did tell him he would have known that and would have mentioned it first.”

San's eyes slightly narrow “But what if he didn’t mention it on purpose? He’s a cop so he’s great at being able to convince someone with words by conveniently leaving things out.” Okay, as a cop this is embarrassing how I’m forgetting my own methods now. I sigh and lay back onto the bed “Ok you know what?" I frustratedly run my fingers through my hair. "Fine who cares how he found out, the problem is that he found out and now I’m fucking scared to go back knowing I’m only there because he’s going to wait until I fuck up so he could kill me. Even then I still don't want to lose you either.” A big knot grows in my throat, feeling the tears begin to sting my eyes “This is why I'm telling you, because I need your help. I don’t know what to do, and I didn’t want to leave without a word and leave you wondering whether I’m okay or not.”

San lays next to me and wipes the tears away then gently pulls me close to him “You won’t be alone I promise, Seonghwa will be my eyes. I have a plan but that will be all up to you if you want to do this.” I nod “Of course, anything.” He smiles and kisses my forehead “Good girl, the plan is you will be my informant on what the police department is up to regarding Aurora Syndicate. Of course you’ll be under observation so evreytime you do have Information I’ll have Seonghwa send over the information via burner phone and dispose of it after each use to lower the chance of us getting caught.” San gives me the most gentle gaze and gently kisses the side of my head “This is going to end soon I promise, even if you’ll be someone else’s temporarily.”

I furrow my eyebrows and give him a confused stare “Uh what?” He smirks and lifts up my chin “You’ll have to pretend you and Seonghwa are in a relationship because he’s going to be living with you, even though it pains me. I have no choice at this point than to fool Lee for a little while longer while we gather up a plan.” What is this? Again with the fake boyfriend? I look up in disappointment while massaging my temples lightly “Really? How can you be so comfortable sharing me with another man like that? Can't we just be roommates or something?” He shrugs “The thing is if he's not related to you in anyway at all people will start looking into him a lot more, your supposed relationship to him might be a good distraction for them and much more convincing.”

He's really trying to sell me this, it's not a horrible idea but I don't know.. Kind of awkward after what happened between me and Seonghwa last night. “Besides when you went to your funeral with him and he brought you back home safely didn’t he?” I roll my eyes and jokingly retort “Yeah, what if I fall in love with him? Then what?” He smiles and takes my face in his hand “Hm, well then I’ll try to win you back no matter how many times it takes because like I said in the end you and I both know you’re mine. I know my place in your heart and you know mine, we are one. So, no. I’m not worried I'll lose you to him because I know it’s not going to happen. You’ll always be mine in one way or another.” Never have I seen a man so sure about how he feels towards me. How... Nice.

“You really feel that way?” I ask while I gently run my hand along his white t shirt clad chest. “I mean, do you? Because, I do.” he chuckles and raises an eyebrow giving me a dimpled smirk while I try to keep myself composed and nod “Of course I do.” he pulls me in a little closer and kisses me while he gently tucks a lock of hair behind my ear. “No one will hurt you.” I poke his small dimple “I know, I believe you. I’ve seen what you can do.” San smirks devilishly hovering his lips over mine “I can do that and much more, just for you.” I giggle and clear the few stray pieces of hair from his face. His cat like eyes making me dizzy, for a second I forget how lost in his gaze I am until he leans in and kisses my forehead "My angel."

In response I rest my forehead on his shoulder and sigh "I'm tired of all of this San. I want this to stop." He gently presses his lips on the top of my head whilst he holds me close "I know you do baby. I want it to stop too, I want to be happy with you. Soon, okay?" Feeling a tinge of guilt, I bite my lip trying my hardest not to cry despite the huge uncomfortable knot in my throat.

San rolls onto his back and pulls me onto his chest "Let's lay here for a bit." I look up at him "So that's it?" San raises his eyebrow and hums "What do you mean? Was I supposed to say something else?" I shrug "I don't know, you don't seem shaken up over Lee's threat towards me." San runs his fingers through my hair "Well, how do you know I'm not scared?" He's right, maybe he's trying to keep me from freaking out. "Well, for one we moved on from this conversation way too quickly." He quietly stares up at the ceiling for a few moments his fingers now gently massaging my scalp until he finally speaks again. "Hm, well I am scared. I'm also angry and bloodthirsty, but I can't show you that part of myself. I don't want to scare you, I don't want to fuel your brain with ideas of me that might make you not trust me at all."

Okay so I guess I was right, he knows he still scares me to some degree despite loving him so much. I hate how conflicting this is. "I see, so you're trying to spare me from freaking out then?" He smiles gently booping my nose "You got it." I rest my head on his chest and sigh.I hate how my "fake" death ended up becoming pointless, and unfortunately it's probably something Captain Lee will end up blackmailing me with. I thought I was going to catch him by surprise but no, now I'm hoping I can find a way for Captain Lee to get blindsided while still under his observation.

I look up and notice San staring up at the ceiling again then I bury my face in the crook of his neck holding onto him tightly. He turns to me and gently plants a kiss on my temple then rests his head onto mine. “I really am going to miss you.” I lace his fingers between mine “I am too honestly. I wish we could stay like this forever.” Letting him go now seems like a crime, why is it that he terrifies me but yet makes me so happy? “I got so used to having you at my side for so long that I forgot what it felt like to not feel so- I don’t know, alone?” I giggle “That’s a nice way of putting it because I feel the same way.” He pushes a strand of hair behind my ear and shows me his dimpled smile “Yeah?” My ears get hot and I bury my face in his chest causing him to quietly laugh “I swear you’re so cute when you get shy. I’ll miss that too.” I peek and look up at him “Hey, don’t be sad. I did a surprise for you and the guys this morning but I think maybe the food has gotten cold by now.” HIs eyes light up “Wait, wow. I get to try your food?” I nod and awkwardly smile “Yeah but if you don’t like it it’s okay. I honestly hate my cooking but my family strangely seemed to love it so I just wanted to cook for you guys because I trust my family’s opinion on it despite personally not really being a fan of what I make.”

San gives me a dimpled smile “I’m sure it’s delicious angel eyes, I know I’m going to love it so don’t worry. Also, I think we should go eat. I’m sure after everything this morning you’re probably really hungry.” He smirks and winks at me causing me to cover my eyes. Why is he always making my heart feel like it's going to jump out of my throat? “Stop it. Stop doing that thing with your face again!” He removes my hand from my face and chuckles "Wait, what's wrong with my face?" I shyly look in the other direction avoiding eye contact while my voice slowly trails "Um, nothing. You just.." San turns my face back in his direction "You what?" Stunned, I simply blink back in response until he chuckles and pulls me into a chaste kiss. Once he pulls away he gently runs his thumb along my bottom lip and for a few moments I recalibrate my brain until I finally respond "You're handsome...That's what I wanted to say." San hums and pulls my hand up to his lips gently pressing it onto his lips. "So sweet aren't we baby?"

When we walk to the kitchen we notice most of the guys were in the living room except Hongjoong, Jongho and Wooyoung who were in their respective rooms. I look over at San awkwardly knowing full well that some of them aren't too keen on me. I clear my throat trying to lightly bring their attention “So uh, is anyone hungry?” Yunho looks up from the game he’s playing “Hm? There’s food?” I nod “Yeah, I woke up early this morning to make it mostly because I couldn’t go back to sleep. Do you mind getting the others? I’ll bring Wooyoung’s breakfast later when he’s woken up.”

Yunho nods and walks over to go fetch the 2 others while everyone else takes their seat at the table meanwhile Seonghwa and I set the table while evreyone talks amongst themselves waiting for the others to come. Eventually Jongho, Hongjoong and Yunho sit down at the table with the only person missing being Wooyoung. Seeing everyone here except Wooyoung felt odd considering he was always very much present in the conversations but now that he wasn’t here the table was more at peace or so we thought. Seonghwa looks over at me and San “So uh, why are we here all together?”

San laces his fingers together “Well, something happened this morning.” Hongjoong narrows his eyes "The feds know where we are?" Jongho glances at San "Did they?" San shakes his head then pushes his glasses up "No. Captain Lee contacted y/n about going back to the police station. Of course he knows she’s alive now but blatantly threatened her to come back to the police force because he knows that she knows about his involvement with The Black Obsidian. He says he wants her working there to keep tabs on her which comes to my next statement. We’re starting a very important assignment regarding this issue. Of course the person who’s going to actually be joining y/n will be Seonghwa.”

Everyone is silent then Mingi slowly raises his hand “So it’s just him? What are we supposed to do then?” San nods “yeah, the reason why he’s going is because he’s the only one that that has no file under his name in the NIS data base” Hongjoong looks at San “Neither does Yeosang though.” San looks over at Hongjoong and smirks “That’s the thing, I’m sure Yeosang is not going to want to pretend he’s y/n’s lover. I also know y/n is definitely not comfortable with him either.” Yunho looks over at Seonghwa whose ears were a bright pink hue then back at San “Wait so are you saying Seonghwa is going to go with y/n and pretend he’s her boyfriend? Why though? Is it to keep an eye on her?” San nods then Seonghwa uncomfortably shifts in his seat “Yep, Seonghwa is also going to be the one communicating to us what’s going on at the station since I’m sure y/n won’t even have the chance to since she’ll be under a microscope with Lee.”

Yeosang frowns “So what does that have to do with us? Isn’t it just going to be a mission just for them?” San takes a sip of his warm tea and continues “No, it’ll involve you guys as well but that means you’ll have to lay low. Some will be tailing Lee and other officials working for him that includes y/n’s partner Detective Chris Bang, some of you will also be keeping watch the security cameras at the police station and the cameras near and around where y/n will reside in case anyone is sent by Captain Lee.” Everyone stays silent for a while then Jongho says “Wooyung isn’t part of any of this right? He’s still recovering from that punctured lung.” San bites the inside of his cheek “Yeah, he’s not. I just want him to get better and that means he can’t strain himself so please no one speak to him about this. Obviously I don’t know how long this will take but until he gets better please don’t say anything you all know how he is.” Hongjoong cocks an eyebrow “What about when he asks about y/n? You know how he is with his questions.” Yeosang then says “Just tell him she voluntarily left on her own because Lee found out she was alive.”

San leans back onto his chair “There’s your answer, with Seonghwa just say he went on an assignment abroad. Everyone understand? ” Everyone agrees and say in an untimed unison “Yes boss.” Meanwhile Seonghwa silently stares at the table then he looks at San “So you trust me enough let me pass off as y/n’s lover?” I look over at Seonghwa and can tell he’s probably not comfortable going through with this. San gives him a smile clearly showing him how much he trusts him “Of course, you’ve taken such great care of her when I wasn’t able to. Besides this is all fake anyway.” He understandably nods and says “Alright, I’ll do my best to make you proud again.” Seonghwa catches me staring at him and gives me a sweet smile “I promise I won’t let anything to happen to you.” I nod and try to act as nonchalant as I can “Thank you, I appreciate it.” Meanwhile San pats my head and says “Alright everyone can resume eating now, I heard y/n cooked this for us so let’s not leave anything on our plates.”

Everyone begins to eat and after a few moments I notice a few of the guys nodding in approval. Yeosang then looks over at me and says “Thank you for the food y/n.” Shocked he even complimented me I vigorously nod “Thank you so much but it wasn’t just me, Seonghwa helped me as well. I’m sure if he didn’t help the food wouldn’t have been as good as it was.” Could it be that a way to get to a cold man's heart is food? It's starting to ring true now. Seonghwa chuckles “I only peeled the potatoes and made the rice, it was all you y/n.” With his cheeks stuffed with food mid chew Mingi says “You’d honestly make a great wife, your cooking is immaculate and reminds me of my mother’s” San gives Mingi a stare and I nervously laugh “I’m sure your mother’s cooking is way more delicious Mingi” Jongho gives me a comforting smile “Honestly your cooking is amazing, even if you don’t feel that way. I’m saying that because these guys are so picky that the in house chef we had back at HQ quit after about a month of being there.”

I cover my mouth trying to cover up the big smile on my face then I say “Well, I guess I’m lucky to have such picky eaters like my food.” San puts his hand on my thigh and gently squeezes “See? Don’t forget to give yourself some credit sometimes.” I give him a small smile and nod then I look in the direction of the rest of the table “I know this is random but I just wanted to let you guys know I won’t be outing any information regarding the Syndicate if that’s what some of you are worried about, I’ll take that to the grave.” Jongho sets down his coffee mug onto the table “Don’t worry, I trust you. I’m sure the others do as well to an extent they just don’t want to admit it but I believe you y/n.” Yunho and Seonghwa both nod then Yunho responds while looking directly at Yeosang and Hongjoong “Even then for the ones who still don’t trust you they’ll see you’re not a bad person and you’re worth trusting.” Hongjoong tilts his head “You must be talking about Yeosang and not me. If I didn’t trust y/n I wouldn’t have let her touch a computer and much less suggest to San to let her have her own.”

My lips slightly part looking at the table then I look back and notice Hongjoong’s usual annoyed look replaced with one of a small smile “But also how could I not trust someone who likes Spongebob?” I giggle then I turn to Yunho “He’s right, he’s actually been very nice to me so no worries about that.” He continues looking in Yeosang’s direction “I’m glad to hear, although I was mostly referring to Yeosang here considering how many rude and tasteless things he’s said to you and that doesn’t even include the things he’s said while Wooyoung instigated.” I shake my head “Ah, no that’s okay don’t worry. I respect his reasons.”

He silently nods for a few seconds as if he was unconsciously doing it to calm himself down “You’ll see she’s not a horrible person, and when Wooyoung comes back he’s going to see for himself too.” Yeosang sits there staring at Yunho for a few seconds then stands up silently and walks to his room leaving everyone in shock. Why do I always cause these things, if someone isn’t getting upset over something I did someone else is getting upset over something someone did to me. I wish this wasn’t the case, it only comes off that I’m the one causing problems.

San glances at Yeosang’s empty seat then back at me “Don’t worry, he’ll be fine he just can’t stand being wrong.” I silently nod then San smiles and says “Everyone is dismissed for now, we’ll talk about everything in detail later…” A few moments later San’s cellphone rings and hurriedly gets up and says “I’ll be back, I’ve got to take this call..” Eventually evreyone finishes eating but San never comes back so once everyone leaves, I stay behind to clean the dishes while Seonghwa clears the table. He silently walks over to me holding a few plates gently setting them down onto the sink and walks back to the table to retrieve more. He’s awfully quiet.

Should I say something? I stare down at the bubbly water in the sink until I finally speak “Why’d you stay? I would have cleaned up, it’s fine.” Without turning in his direction I could hear the slight clinking of the glasses as he steps in my direction again. “I wanted to, besides it didn’t sit right for me not to clean up after myself.” I dryly laugh “You mean after your friends?” I turn to Seonghwa who walks up next to me and sets down the glasses next to the sink and gives me a smirk “Exactly, you need my help. Scoot over.” I roll my eyes and scoot over, giving Seonghwa room to stand next to me and begin to dry off the plates I've already washed. For a while he and I clean together in silence until unexpectedly I hear “Sorry, I wasn’t expecting the call to be this long but something came up.” Both Seonghwa and I turn to San and he continues “I know this is very short notice but do you mind coming to something with me tomorrow night angel eyes?” I glance at Seonghwa who looked just as confused as I then back at San who was standing at the entrance of the kitchen waiting for a response “Aren’t we supposed to lay low?”

I ask slightly unsure, San gives me a reassuring smile “We’ll be okay. I just wanted you to meet my mother and sister, you know since Seonghwa here knows them I think it’s a good idea you meet them as well. I’m almost positive you three will get along.” I can’t meet his family, what if they don’t like me and they send for me to get killed? Especially if they find out I’m a former cop. Seonghwa glances at me slightly concerned “What if she just stays home and rests? She’s been through alot these past days.” San lets out a sigh and pats Seonghwa's back turning his attention back to himself. “Jongho, you, and the rest are coming so we’ll be fine. Besides, if she doesn’t want to go she's more than welcome to stay home.” Well, I guess I have a social affair to attend to now. At least now I'll get to do a little familiarization with San's family.

"I'll go..I don't mind sounds fun. I'm kind of tired of being couped up." San gives me a small smile "There you go, you heard the lady. She's going." Seonghwa quietly washes a glass under the warm running water while I dry off my hands on the hand towel next to the sink “What exactly is this thing we’re going to?” San walks over to me holding back a big smile “It’s my sister’s birthday” He gently rests his hand on my uninjured shoulder “I wanted you to join us. I know you’re supposed to be resting right now but Jongho will be there, so I promise you’ll be okay. Besides I figured you'd like to know who works for us and how deep our business runs. ” I slowly nod “Okay sure, but what am I supposed to wear? I didn't bring anything with me, much less anything that covers up what happened on my shoulder..”

San shakes his head “Don’t worry about it, I’ll take care of everything.” He glances over at Seonghwa and says “Make sure my mother doesn’t find out about the specifics with the police, I don’t want her to worry. There’s also a small job I need you to do for me. Mingi will be joining you.” Seonghwa nods obediently “Noted, but what happens if she asks why Wooyoung isn’t there? She knows he’d never miss anything like this..” San stares off into the distance for a moment “He had a family emergency and he wasn’t available.” San seemed to have become a bit haste to which Seonghwa seemed to pick up on and responds “Oh, okay that seems plausible.” San motions him in the direction of the living room “Mingi’s waiting.” Seonghwa sets down the dishes, wipes his hands dry on the hand towel next to the sink and excuses himself.

I notice there’s this weird tension between them but I can’t put my finger on why they feel that way towards each other or if it’s mutual. “You remember Nari? She’s coming over to get you ready for tomorrow.” Oh, it’s the same woman that did my hair and got me dolled up for my funeral. I guess it makes sense, she’ll probably know what the family approves of. “Sounds nice, she was nice..” I look down at the ground not wanting to meet his eyes. San gently turns my face in his direction with his eyebrows softly furrowed “What’s wrong angel eyes? Are you okay?” I sigh and lean into his touch “I’m scared. What if they hate me?” San gently caresses my cheek with his thumb “Babe, I promise they won’t hate you. I’ll just tell them you’re not involved in the business so they won’t ask you any questions over who you're affiliated with and who you work for.” Wait, does that mean he’s going to tell his mom about us? “Wait, why would you tell your mom that? Are you going to tell her about us?”

He nods and takes both my hands gently bringing them up to his lips “Of course, but I’m still going to tell her not to speak on it to anyone and to pretend you and I are simply colleagues in the eyes of others but she’ll know.” San lies alot, which worries me. If he easily lies over the smallest things like this does that mean he’ll easily lie to me? “You’re lying again.” He dryly laughs and pulls me closer to him “My mother won’t speak I promise, if she was able to keep my dad’s deepest darkest secrets I’m sure she can keep our relationship a secret. I felt like it’s something we should do before you’re gone, I want at least someone to know about us..” if only he knew that someone does know, just not who he thinks it is. He leans in and gives me a quick peck making sure no one was around then gently pushes a strand of my hair behind my ear “You trust me right?” Stupidly enough, like always my brain decides to completely betray me and respond without thinking “I do.” He gently kisses my forehead and softly says in a low voice “My beautiful angel.” Everytime he calls me that it makes me melt, and I think he knows that.

“I’m going to give you a more dramatic look today, obviously still within the likes of Mrs. Choi” Nari gently works in some sort of eye primer on my eyes using a soft brush and begins to work on my eye makeup. After a few minutes of her working her magic I have a sudden urge to ask her a question “Nari, I have a question..” She softly hums and I clasp my hands together “Do you know Mrs. Choi and San’s sister?” I concentrate on the gentle brush strokes to calm me down for some reason slightly afraid of her answers “I do, they’re very sweet. I work with them quite often actually. I just saw them this morning.” I quietly hum then Nari continues “How come? Are you worried about something?” I let out a soft sigh “Well, I’m scared they might not like me. I heard what the mother did to one of San’s exes and ordered for her assassination.”

The older woman clicks her tongue “Well, do you know what happened?” What happened? What does she mean? Does she mean that woman did something to upset San’s mother? “Uh, I mean no. Not really that’s honestly all I could dig up, besides San’s never mentioned any of his exes so I genuinely don’t know the full situation” Nari pops her gum followed by the smile in her voice “I can tell you, I’ve been working for the Choi family for years…” I softly gasp and open my eyes “Wait, for how long?” Nari gives me a soft smile “ I was hired personally by Mrs. Choi ten years ago, ever since then I’ve been doing her and her daughter’s makeup for public events..”

Nari gently has me close my eyes again and continues “Anyway, as you know her name was Hae Jihye she and San dated for a few years. I believe it was about 5 or so years but they eventually became engaged, both were pretty young but since the Choi family was so well off Mrs. Choi encouraged them to get married. She was very fond of Jihye up until San found out she was secretly seeing another man and stealing money from him and ordering shady dealings without double checking these were allies and not possible undercover cops. Up until her death she always said it was because San never gave her attention and because she felt lonely but everyone close to the Choi’s know he treated her like his princess. He would have brought her the moon if she so wanted, he gave her everything. Open.”

I open my eyes and see Nari begins to fill in my eyebrows and continues “Anyway, it so just happened the real reason was that she thought San was a huge pushover and was only planning on marrying him for his money and the Choi’s heavy influence. She wanted to be someone important since she came from a poor background.” Poor San, he gave his heart to this woman and she stomped all over it… “So when Mrs. Choi caught wind of it thanks to San’s best friend Wooyoung she began to conspire against Jihye. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned..” Nari smooths out some sort of face primer on my skin, her hands being gentle against my skin then quickly begins to work on my base “She got Kang Yeosang, one of San’s associates to carry out the assasination and right as she was exiting the beauty salon she was shot and killed. Just to add insult to injury Mrs. Choi sent the hand of Jihye’s secret lover to her grieving family along with a note that read “Hope you enjoy this small gift!” and that was that. ”

I look at Nari giving her a very unnerved expression “Wow that's…heavy.” Nari nods while gently powdering my face “So lesson of the story is don't be an opportunist and Mrs. Choi will be kind.” I know Nari and San said Mrs. Choi is nice but I can't keep myself from thinking she's going to find something she doesn't like. What a great time to overthink. “Actually, San doesn't want to tell her about me being a cop..” Nari begins to gently apply my lipstick with small gentle strokes “Sweetheart I think you should just be honest, I mean you've been all over the news recently. I'm sure Mrs. Choi knows exactly who you are.” Oh my gosh how could I forget about that?! She's right, it's going to be a horrible look if I lie to her right from the start.

“I should let San know, you know like about me not wanting to lie to his mom not what happened with Jihye. I'll definitely never mention her ever.” Nari then raises her eyebrows “So, are you going to tell his mom you two are thing?” Her question catching me off guard I almost choke on my own saliva causing me to swallow quite hard. For a moment, I struggle how to answer until I finally but hesitantly respond “Well honestly, I think it’s a bad idea that I tell her we’re together especially if she knows I'm a cop. Despite how nice she is, she has too much history between my previous boss and her family, not the good kind either. Knowing she’s willing to kill I think I’m going to steer clear from her radar as cowardly as it seems.” Nari rests her hand on her hip “So, what do you plan to do?” I sigh “Well, continue to keep it a secret.”

Nari furrows her eyebrows and crosses her arms in front of her chest “But for how much longer? You know, Mrs. Choi isn’t getting any younger and eventually she’s going to ask San to marry again. You do understand right?” She’s right, Mrs. Choi is definitely going to ask San to marry only it makes sense for him to marry of someone of his status and the same lifestyle as his. As much as I love and I’m in love with him, we’re too different to be in each other's life in the long run and only confirms what I've been thinking this whole time which is to just enjoy it while it lasts. “I do, which is why I'm going to backtrack telling her about our relationship but not who I am. That I can't lie about, as scary as It is.” gives me a soft smile “Well, it's settled.. Also, we should get started on your hair. Your dress should be arriving sometime soon!” I nod and let out a nervous sigh. I have to brace myself for everything. I will try my best to look like a good person.

Later after Nari is done with my hair, makeup and dressing me I look in the mirror and honestly just like the first time I'm not disappointed in what I’m seeing just a little weirded out that I can look this good. My hair was loosely curled, like those gorgeous movie stars on tv, the makeup was light (For my taste at least) so that it complimented my features. Meanwhile the dress that was picked out for me was a satin strapless asymmetric neckline dress with a high slit on the right side of the dress luckily it was a long dress so it covered my legs really nicely and it wasn’t as showy as I thought it’d be considering how high the slit is. Finally to cover up my wound Nari carefully drapes a gorgeous white fur wrap over my shoulders. Nari steps behind me and hands me a black pair of designer high heels. It’s those shoes that movie stars wear, the ones with the red soles. I let out a gasp and carefully take the shoes as if they were made of glass “Nari, are you sure?” Nari smirks “Of course I’m sure, you’re wearing vintage Mugler.. You can’t just wear any old pair of shoes.” I give her a nervous smile and carefully put on my black high heeled shoes. Nari then steps back and gives me a proud smile “You look amazing y/n, I hope you feel as pretty as you look. “ I smooth out the soft fabric beneath my fingers and nod “I do, thank you for everything..” The older woman smiles and shakes her head “Thank San, he asked me to do this for you.”

Of course he did, this man is all about the details. Now it was about that time I look for San so that I could talk to him about what to say to his mother. Right after exiting my room I'm soon greeted by a dressed up Jongho who’s jaw immediately drops “Wow, you look amazing y/n. I uh- San is waiting up front, he asked me to guide you into the car.” I give Jongho a smile and tease him “You might want to pick your jaw up from the floor or a fly will go in there.” Jongho chuckles and leads the way while I silently walk behind him. Awkwardly enough I had to walk into that tattoo shop dressed like this but unlike before all eyes were on me which made me alot more nervous so I gently hold onto Jongho’s arm so that I wouldn’t risk embarrassing myself in case I trip over my dress. Once outside I realize it was beginning to get dark out that’s when Jongho opens the door to the expensive looking car and lo and behold San was there.

His hair was now cut shorter than before with a small strand of hair framing his face, whilst he wore a white dress shirt with a few buttons undone and a buttoned up black vest, a back blazer, with matching slacks and shoes. He looked so immaculate and perfect, that In the moment I think I almost forgot why I was even there to begin with until San gently grabs my hand and gently tugs on it. I blink a few times and it’s like I rebooted remembering where and why I was there. San gives me a small dimpled smile and I get into the car sitting next to him. His cologne slowly bringing me back to reality “You look gorgeous angel eyes.” I glance over at him, his eyes looking at me like he was devouring me with his gaze which was making me painfully shy, that is until I remember I needed to tell him something. San gently reaches for my exposed thigh and gently squeezes causing my ears to begin to burn and I mindlessly respond “And you look handsome Sannie..”

San leans in and gently kisses me whilst his hand squeezes my thigh a little harder leaving me to let out a soft sigh whilst he deepens the kiss. I only allow myself to indulge in the kiss for a few more seconds until I gently pull away while gently pushing him away. He gives me a confused look then furrows his brows “Angel eyes are you okay?” I nod and gently smooth out my dress “Yes, I just wanted to talk to you about something before we arrive at your sister’s party.” He gently takes my hand and nods “Sure, what is it?” I glance over at San whose eyes were soft again, a complete one eighty from a few seconds ago “We should just tell your mom that I’m a cop, you know it’ll be much easier than lying” San looks at me slightly worried and looks down gently rubbing his thumb on the back of my hand “Um, I don’t know about that..” I tilt my head “How come? Is it because I’m going back to the station next week? You know she’s probably seen the news..”

San lets out a sigh and stares down at my hand for a few moments before he briefly glances back up at me me then says in a lower almost worried tone “That’s why, because I’m sure she’ll like you but once she realizes you’re a cop she’s going to bombard you with questions..Assumptions.” I reach over and take San’s handsome face in my hands gently caressing his soft skin “And that’s okay, it’s valid on her part considering the previous history between cops and your family. I understand.” He gently takes my hand in his lovingly squeezing it “Are you positive you’re going to be okay with the questions?” I nod giving him a reassuring smile “Of course Sannie, let’s just be honest for once. This is something so important to me that I want to be honest out of respect to your mother and our relationship, please. Just this once I don’t want to lie about something I can’t hide. I don’t want to pretend to be someone I’m not even if your mother ends up hating me for it, it’s the risk i’m willing to take.”

San gives me a dimpled smile, takes my hands from his face and gently kisses them “You really do have a heart of gold angel eyes.. No matter how hard things get your intentions are always well intentioned.” I look down and press my lips into a curt smile “One more thing.” San gently turns my face to face him "What’s that?” Not wanting to meet his eyes I look down at the collar of his shirt “I thought about it and I don’t want your mother to find out about us.” San gives me a confused look “Wait- but..” I nod “I know, I just said that I didn’t want us to lie but I was talking about things I can’t hide.. Besides we’re technically not lying if you just don’t mention it.” slightly upset San takes my arm and tightly squeezes it but only enough to get my attention “But you agreed with me yesterday, why the sudden change of mind?” I shrug “I don’t know I just did a lot of thinking and it doesn’t make sense to come clean right now, it’s too soon.”

San lifts up my chin to meet his eyes while holding on to my arm, they were sad with a hint of anger. He looked genuinely hurt, but now it’s complicated. I need to see how his mom will react to the news of me being a cop, then I’ll know my answer. I need to tread lightly with this family because I truly don’t know their intentions. For all I know this is all a part of San’s plan to get me to trust him then get me killed once I do. Even then I doubt San will hold on much longer, Nari is right his mom is probably looking for someone he could marry right this moment which is why he wants to tell his mother. “As much as I strongly feel the complete opposite, I'll respect your wishes. I understand you’re nervous.” I sigh “I’m sorry but can you blame me? Any regular person would be terrified considering how powerful your family is. I don’t want to fuck up.”

San loosens his grip on my arm “I’m sorry I’m forcing you to do all these things so fast. It’s just-” He shuts his eyes and rests his head on my shoulder and lets out a long sigh “It’s my mom, she’s been looking into having me marry the Iceman’s daughter, Jisu.” I furrow my eyebrows “Why?..” He stares down at himself gently squeezing and holding onto my forearm “Business.. And because she’s close friends with Iceman’s wife.” Wow, yeah. I think involving myself even more will be a death sentence. What if she has me killed because she wants San to marry into her friend’s family? “Ah, I see.” I stiffly nod. I knew it, his mom already has eyes for someone. San raises his gaze and looks at me with concern painting his features “You’re upset aren’t you?” I shake my head and fake a laugh “No, I mean I saw it coming. I understand.”

San gives me a very unamused look then the driver driving our vehicle clears his throat and says “Sorry for the interruption boss, but we’re here.” San nods slightly detached still fixated on my expression “Yeah, okay. Thanks Woosik.” I feel horrible pissing him off but I think this is it. I’m so cowardly. Almost as if a switch went off he gently takes my hand and kisses the back of it “I’ll introduce you as a colleague okay? I don’t want you to be uncomfortable let alone feel like i’m forcing you to do things you don’t want to..” I nod and lean in to gently kiss his cheek then I give him a soft smile “Thank you..”

San’s expression brightens up a bit and gives me a small dimpled smile “Are you ready angel?” I nod and he gives me a sweet smile. Next to me the door opens and a very well dressed man helps me out of the car and soon after San steps out right behind me. He then gently rests his hand on the small of my waist and gently guides me to the big mansion, that house.. It’s huge. The Choi family is loaded. It’s everything you would have imagined in a mansion: the fountain, the gates, the two sculptures near the entrance, the beautiful decorative trees adorning the front of the house.

The times I’ve been to houses like this is usually when we’re going to arrest someone or when we’re investigating the murder of a high profile person which isn’t very often so to see this gorgeous house and being dressed in designer from head to toe, it makes me feel like I'm in some sort of movie. Once we’re inside the faint sound of classical music fills the air along with the high class ambience immediately making me straighten up my posture. All the people here look expensive, it also kind of freaks me out knowing that 90 percent of the people here are more than likely white collar criminals. I look over in San’s direction slightly worried only for him to give me a small reassuring smile. ”Follow me.” I grab onto the sleeve of his blazer following behind him quietly whilst he makes his way to presumably his mother.

We approach a gorgeous older woman who obviously didn’t look her age but could tell her age based off of what she was wearing, which was a long semi fitted dark blue dress with a high neck “Mother, I’m here.” The woman turns her attention away from the woman she was speaking to and gasps “Sannie, you made it..” San pulls the shorter woman in his arms and hugs her tightly “You know I’d never miss my sister’s birthday.” She pulls back gently cupping her hands on his face with a smile. “My son, my strong handsome son.” Both him and his mother chuckle then she pulls away and looks around us “Where’s Wooyoungie sweetie? Last time I talked to him he said he’d come..”

San takes Mrs. Choi’s hand “Ah, yeah about that. Wooyoung couldn’t make it tonight he had a personal emergency.” Mrs. Choi worriedly furrows her brows “Oh my- Is he okay?” San nods giving his mother a reassuring pat “He is he’s fine, he’s just dealing with a few private matters that couldn’t be postponed and were very last minute.” Wow, he’s good at lying to his own mother too that’s actually scary. He’s not even hesitating. The mother understandably nods “Well I hope whatever it is I hope he sorts it out soon..” Mrs. Choi then turns in my direction, for a few seconds she examines my face then she says “Oh hello, wow who is this gorgeous girl Sannie?”

I reach out and shake his mother’s hand politely smiling “Hello Mrs. Choi I am Detective y/n y/ln, I’m one of Mr. Choi’s current colleagues. His connection to the Ulwood PD. ” His mother’s eyes widen slightly then quickly composes herself before San says “She’s been a great help helping me track Lee and his other people..” For a few moments San’s mother stares at me “Are you really working for the Aurora Syndicate? Are you sure you don’t secretly work for the police to turn my son in?” San chuckles gently patting his mother’s back “She’s fine mother, I made sure of it. Besides she has her own grudges against Lee, I promise you she won’t betray us.” Mrs. Choi nods “You’re that detective that was found dead aren’t you?” I nod and lightheartedly chuckle “Yeah, that’s me. So you have no worries about me turning on anyone.” Mrs. Choi looks over at San and smiles “Look at you, giving that old bastard a taste of his own medicine. You’re definitely your father’s son.” San nervously laughs “Mom..”

A gorgeous long dark brown haired woman approaches us, her eyes were sultry and had a very mysterious and intimidating energy surrounding her. Her gaze looking straight at San, almost like he was some sort of target to her. “Hello, how are you on this lovely evening?” Mrs. Choi turns in said woman’s direction and smiles “Jisu sweetheart, hello how are you? I’m glad you could make it!” Jisu smiles and reaches for Mrs. Choi’s hand and gently pats it “Of course, I wouldn't have missed it for the world. I’m glad I could be here for Haneul’s big day.” Mrs. Choi smiles “Thank you” Jisu looks back at San and smiles in his direction “Is this the infamous Choi San?” Mrs. Choi chuckles and gently pats San’s shoulder then San responds slightly hesitant “Yeah, you must be Jisu. My mother’s mentioned you before.” Jisu reaches over to shake San’s hand and for a moment her hand shake lingers.

A bit shocked she’s holding onto his hand and not letting go until he pulls away his hand and puts it in his pocket. Mrs. Choi looks at both San and Jisu “I did, did I also mention you’re both the same age? I’m sure you two would get along very well.” Jisu looks in San’s direction tucking a lock of her hair behind her ear “Of course we will, San seems like a person I’d get along with perfectly. He’s so hardworking and it shows.” Jisu smirks then shifts her gaze over to me where her smirk slowly disappears then she softly laughs “Oh my- I’m sorry hello, who are you?” I give Jisu curt smile and extend my hand “Detective y/n y/l, I’m currently working for Mr. Choi.” She raises her eyebrow “My, my I didn’t know San was willing to be risky, you feds are hard to trust. Nine times out of ten you have ulterior motives.” I chuckle feeling the venomous intent behind her words. “Well then I guess I’m the 1 out of 10 who has no ulterior motives. Mr. Choi knows he’s in good hands trusting me. Am I right Mr. Choi?”

I turn to him giving him a small smile. San immediately picks up on what I was trying to do and responds “Of course, she’s shown me her loyalty multiple times. At the end of the day we both have the same goal so why not team up with someone like minded.” Jisu hums then shrugs “Well, as long as you’re confident that’s all that matters.” Mrs. Choi gently takes my arm and says “San, I need to have a word with Detective y/ln. Do you mind keeping Jisu company?” San looks at me sympathetically then back at his mother “Ah, yes mother.” Jisu looks in my direction, smirking almost like she knew this was something I couldn’t get myself out of. Almost like she expected the worst. I’m worried. Did I say something wrong?

Mrs. Choi quietly walks me out of the room the party was being held in and once outside in the hallway she lets go of my arm. Expecting her to maybe say something she continues walking in silence unnerving me even more as the seconds go by. I walk behind her until we enter the big marbled floor living room, she motions me to sit down on the expensive looking velvet couch which I oblige. She walks over to the small cocktail table and serves us both drinks, I'm presuming whiskey. At this point I’m beginning to get very impatient. What exactly was the reason I was pulled away from everyone else. What is she going to tell me? She sets my drink on the coffee table then sits across from me while she holds her whiskey in her hand. I clear my throat running my fingers along the soft fabric of my dress “So, uh what did you want to talk about Mrs Choi?” She takes a small sip of her drink the gently rests it on her lap ”So you said you work for the Ulwood police department correct?” I nod carefully clasping my hands together and gently resting them on my knees “Yes, correct ma’am” She swirls her drink in the heavy crystal glass whilst I carefully reach for my drink on the table “In the police department? I work under Captain Steven Lee Ma’am.”

She’s not going to like this..I know it. She slightly raises her eyebrow “Very interesting…You do know your Captain killed my husband right?” I nod looking down at my drink slightly bowing my head “Ah, yes Mrs. Choi I was the one in charge of the case. We arrested the people who were involved in the murder.” Like San, his mother has a very intense stare only this time making me very more nervous knowing the lengths his mother is willing to go for her son so I can only imagine what she'd do for her husband. “That you did. Unfortunately you missed the main culprit.” Her words felt like swords stabbing right through me. Words that immediately make my stomach drop.

“I’m aware Mrs. Choi, unfortunately when San showed me what Captain Lee was really up to everything finally made sense. He purposely would steer things away from anything that he thought would get him caught, at the time my partner and I didn’t really understand why he wanted to be so heavily involved in the case since usually he’d be the one to usually just assign them and just stick to focusing on the department’s strategy. So I assure you I didn’t know anything until I met San.” Mrs. Choi stares at me unmoved, a complete 180 from when she was with San and Minia. “I understand, I'm sure that bastard has everyone back at the station fooled..” I nod respectfully agreeing “Yes, unfortunately even the best one among us got fooled. Which is why I’m working with San to put that man down.”

God, I sound so pathetic saying it like that. “So what’s your reason for helping my son? What did Steven do to you?” There’s the question I was waiting for. I let out a long sigh then I meet Mrs. Choi’s eyes finally lifting my gaze to meet hers “Well, San kidnapped me to get Captain Lee back but unfortunately he gave up trying to get me back once he realized he was going to have to expose his crimes to everyone so instead he left me for dead in hopes San gave up threatening him and I’d get killed. Luckily San did the opposite and instead had me pretend I was dead, which unfortunately caused me to lose everything I had; friends, family, career, my home..” With the last words quietly being trailed off from my throat growing a huge knot. Is she going to sympathize with a cop? Someone who works under the man who killed her husband?

Mrs. Choi’s gaze grows a bit soft and sets down her half filled glass on the arm rest of her seat “I am so sorry this happened to you. I can only imagine how many more people are suffering at the hands of Steven.” She’s right there are probably quite a few people getting blackmailed to do his dirty work for him. No doubt. “I just want to make sure you mean well working with my son, because if your intentions are not pure- and please do not take offense but a mother will do everything in her power to protect her son no matter who it’s against.” Ah, just what I was dreading. Nice. “ I understand Mrs. Choi, you have my promise there will be no moves on my part against San. I’m fully on the Aurora Syndicate’s side, you have my word.” Mrs. Choi Smiles “ I have one last question for you y/n.” I nod, taking a sip of my drink, the warmth slowly trickling down my throat and to my stomach. Yep, definitely whiskey. “Sure Mrs. Choi go ahead.”

She gives me a mischievous smile her finger tracing along the rim of her drink “So y/n what do you really think about my son?” I run my finger under the crystal glass trying my hardest to stay calm “Hm, like as a person?” Mrs. Choi warmly smiles clearly trying her best to get me to open up “As a man sweetheart.” My throat tightens causing me to clear my throat. “Oh, uh I mean he’s very handsome, and of course very kind.” Wait, why is she asking me this? “He definitely is, he takes a lot from his father…” Wait that’s all she was going to ask? I mean yeah it’s kinda weird but that’s it? “There’s one thing I will tell you is that my son tends to be quite flirty sometimes and I want you to pay no mind to him” No mind to him? Like ignore him? “Uh- Could you elaborate Mrs. Choi?” She sighs “To be frank, I don’t want you to get involved with my son. I understand you’re working with him but just leave it at that. Nothing more.” Is she really starting to pin this on me? Like I know it's true but oh my gosh how does she know? What gave it away…I need to convince her otherwise or I'll be in big trouble.

“My apologies for asking Mrs. Choi but why?” Mrs. Choi scoffs then retorts in a venomous tone “Because I don’t trust you. No matter what Steven Lee did to you, you’re still working under him. I don’t want San to fall for the same bullshit my husband fell for with Steven. That tragedy is not going to repeat itself again.” I carefully set my glass back onto the glass coffee table and I shake my head “I assure you that’s not going to happen Mrs. Choi. San and I have grown to be very close friends from sharing the same hatred for one person and the last thing I'd ever do is betray him. If anything I owe him my life.” Mrs. Choi seems unconvinced from my plea. “Then know that your place here which is only to help my son get rid of the man who killed my husband and not being romantically involved with him.” I drink the remaining whiskey in my glass in one go to prepare myself “Again, my apologies but I never explicitly stated my feelings towards Mr. Choi. I only really said he’s good looking and has a great heart.”

The woman rolls her eyes at me like just told her the stupidest thing on Earth “You were the one my son was shopping for. I asked you if you were the deceased detective because my son was telling me he was shopping for someone special. The problem is one of his associates let it slip that the girl he was shopping for was “the detective” After a bit of pondering I put two and two together. The last time my son went out of his way to spoil someone like that he was engaged to his former sweetheart.” I’m guessing San is not the type to gift just anyone, they have to be special to him. In that case, I'm special to him.. Wow. “You’re not wrong about your son getting me things, that’s true. That’s only because I needed them. What’s not true is my relationship with him. We’re simply friends.”

Without hesitation Mrs. Choi throws her drink at my face and gets up looking down at me “Don’t get smart with me, stay away from my son.” Her heels clack away little by little becoming more faint while I blankly stare down at the marbled floor in disbelief, my eyes blinking rapidly from the alcohol burning my eyes. She really knows. It's like she stays out of San’s business in front of him but behind his back she gets rid of people she deems useless for her son.. It’s probably why San is insisting of only a few people knowing his true plans. Unfortunately I understand her fear of trusting a cop, it’s completely validated. The thing is I’m not liking how this played out, we’re off to a bad start. Judging from the small things San would tell me about his mother, she seemed nice but now not so much. At least not when you get on her bad side.

Eventually I manage to clear my eyes, my face and ears are burning out of embarrassment. My lap and chest wet from the whiskey, once I manage to stand up I walk back into the party. I let out a long sigh and look around, trying to ignore the wet dress against my skin and my hair and makeup feeling gross. Maybe I should get San out of talking to that girl. He didn’t seem too comfortable with her. I walk around looking for San not really paying attention ahead of me until I accidentally bump into someone with my shoulder causing me to hiss in pain tightly clutching onto my wounded shoulder. “I’m sorry, are you okay? y/n?”

I look up and notice a worried Seonghwa staring down at me whilst the other people he was talking to just silently stare at me. Gosh, I’m so glad to have found someone I recognize. Walking around with a bunch of people I don’t know was starting to make me really uncomfortable considering how horrid I probably look. “I’m fine, sorry I was looking for San. He was with a girl.” Seonghwa raises his eyebrow then he excuses himself from the people he was talking to and walks a few steps away from them pulling me aside “A girl?” I nod looking around trying to see if maybe San was anywhere close by. “Yeah, her name is Jisu, really pretty, looks like a model.” Seonghwa slowly nods “Ah, yes. His mother is trying to set them up..” He looks around and steers me in the opposite direction I was walking “I think for now it’s best you don’t interrupt them, you don’t want to upset Mrs. Choi.”

I glance over at Seonghwa and scoff looking away, feeling the tears in my eyes making them sting “I already did that, can’t you see my makeup is all runny?” Seonghwa turns my face in his direction and slightly squints, gently pushes a lock of my hair behind my ear inspecting my face “Your makeup is fine surprisingly, your hair though. It’s a bit-” I look down clearly embarrassed “I know, ugly..” Seonghwa warmly smiles and takes out the handkerchief in his breast pocket gently patting my face and hair dry “No- I mean your hair looks wet.. What happened?” I close my eyes for a bit to force my tears back into my eyes when I open them I pull his hand towards the exit “I can’t say it here.. Can we go outside?” Seonghwa gently rests his hand on my uninjured shoulder “Before we go, are you hurt? Do we need to get Jongho?”

I look under the fur wrap at my wound and shake my head “No, I’m fine. I just bumped it a little.” He reaches over and links my arm around his “Alright good, this is so you don’t fall by the way. Those shoes look like an accident waiting to happen.” I roll my eyes and laugh “You do know I wear heeled shoes to work sometimes, I have no issues walking on high heels.” He shrugs stifling a laugh “So? What if you fall? In front of all these people..”

Well he’s right, that would be embarrassing and I’ve been embarrassed enough tonight “Okay fine..” Seonghwa starts to guide me out the door until we step outside the chilly evening. “Geez, it’s kind of cold.” I slightly shiver and hug myself standing behind one of the statues at the top of the stairs leading to the door. Seonghwa unbuttons his blazer about to take it off before I panickily mumble “No please, it’s okay…” Seonghwa looks at me for a moment and asks “Are you sure? I don’t want you to catch a cold..” I shake my head forcing a smile “I won’t I promise.” He stands next to me clearing his throat “So, what happened?” I look down and let out a soft sigh and for the first time tonight I begin to really process what happened making my throat grow a knot again. For a few moments I struggle to get the words out until I finally blurt out “San’s mother, she hates me.” Seonghwa gives me a very concerned look “What? Mrs. Choi? How?..” Slightly frustrated I hug myself tighter, tears now rolling down my cheeks “ She found out about me and San, she doesn’t want me to be romantically involved with him because she thinks I’m going to get into his head and basically be the downfall for their business..”

Seonghwa lets out a sigh and pulls me into a hug “I’m so sorry y/n. Did she find out through you or-” I sniffle and pull away looking up at an uneasy Seonghwa “I tried to deny it, but she found out through a slip up with one of the associates, not sure who it was but they referred to me as “the detective” when talking to his mother over who San was shopping for..” Seonghwa lets out a long sigh and rubs his forehead slightly frustrated “San’s going to get pissed..” Once he lets out his small frustration he gently pats my head gently pushing it back onto his chest “Do you want to leave? We don’t have to stay here if you’re uncomfortable.” While my head gently rests on Seonghwa’s chest I look at the entrance for a few long seconds “I don’t know, I feel like maybe I need to go tell San over what happened with his mother. He seemed pretty worried when she asked me to talk.”

Seonghwa gently clears the stray hairs on my face “San will understand, don't worry. I can call him and let him know that I’m taking you home.” I worriedly look at Seonghwa “Are you sure? You don’t have to, you can just give me the keys and I can drive myself.” He chuckles and gently pats my head “It doesn’t bother me, I promise. Besides I can’t let a girl looking as pretty as you drive herself home alone.” Seonghwa pulls his cell phone out of his pocket and scrolls on his phone for a bit then puts his cellphone to his ear, where you can faintly hear the dial tone until you hear San’s voice “Hey, y/n isn’t feeling too well. I’m taking her home.” San’s voice responds but I can’t make out what he’s saying, only that he sounded a bit annoyed. Seonghwa then responds “She’s not feeling too well being here-” Suddenly Seonghwa stops talking while San says something to which Seonghwa tensely responds “Ah, okay then we’ll be out in the front waiting.”

San curtly responds then the call ends rendering Seonghwa to awkwardly let out a sigh putting his cell phone away then slowly pulls back and looks at me forcing a smile “Change of plans, San’s going to take you instead. He asked me to stay and talk to some investors.” I raise an eyebrow “What? I thought he was busy.” Seonghwa gently pats my head and chuckles “Well, I guess he’s not too busy for you. Which is good, maybe he’ll learn to take time to himself instead of working all the time.” Seonghwa looked kind of upset now, although he’s really good at hiding it; his tense body language and his faint darkened mood replaces his usual warm and caring demeanor which is what gave it away. “I’m sorry, for bothering you Hwa.” Seonghwa gives me a faint smile then turns to look at the horizon.

The sky being painted a beautiful shade of sparkly dark blue now as opposed to earlier. “You don't need to, if anything I'm glad we bumped into each other. You needed someone after that encounter with Mrs. Choi, I know right now you’re holding back trying not to cry as much as you’d like.” Unfortunately he’s right, I can’t bawl my eyes out like a child here. Not only would that be embarrassing for me but I know it’ll be embarrassing for San as well. “Yeah, considering what my job is, I kind of have to keep it together even if I am a crybaby when I’m alone.” Seonghwa glances over at me “Just know with me you never have to hold back, I know we still don’t know each other very well but I’m here.” Seonghwa has always been very kind, although I feel weird confiding in him now considering how we’ve gone through the unfortunate situation of him seeing my true relationship with San. I guess it’s nice knowing I have a friend in these situations “Thank you, it means a lot.” Seonghwa gently nudges my arm “So are you going to tell San what happened with his mother?”

I stare at the ground for a few good seconds, before I’m even able to say anything the front door opens followed by “y/n are you okay?” I glance up and it’s a worried San hurriedly walking in my direction, Seonghwa steps aside letting him stand next to me where he reaches over for my arm. “Uh..” Seonghwa looks at the both of us then slightly bows in San’s direction “I’m off, I hope you make it home safely y/n” I give him a reassuring smile then Seonghwa looks in San’s direction “I was keeping y/n company but now that you’re here-” San pats Seonghwa’s back turns him towards the door “Yeah I’ll call you if I need anything, thanks for keeping an eye on her.” Seonghwa forces a smile and excuses himself without saying anything else. What was that?

“Why didn’t you let Seonghwa just take me home? Weren’t you on a date?” San dryly chuckles “What? No.. I mean I was with Jisu but I promise you it wasn’t a date. I was just appeasing my mother since I really didn’t want to upset her here.” San takes my hand gently pressing his lips onto the back of my hand “Enough of me though, what happened?” I let out a long sigh and start walking down the stairs “We have to get out of here, I’m not risking anyone overhearing us no matter how “Safe” it is here. “ San follows behind not letting go of my arm “Wait, is it really that bad? Was it some asshole that said something to you or was it my mother?” San’s last words render me to make the knot in my throat break knowing damn well I wasn’t going to make it without crying. “Baby?” San stands still causing me to be pulled into a complete halt “Look at me, it’s okay. I’m here, I'm not going anywhere.” He pulls me into his arms where he gently presses his lips on my shoulder “Don’t cry, please. We’ll go into the car and talk about this okay?”

San digs into his pocket where after a few moments I hear the sound of his car beeping which was luckily nearby. He pulls back cupping my face looking into my eyes, his usual intimidating gaze is now soft trying his hardest to comfort me “Come on baby, car’s over there.” He grabs my hand and we walk to the car whilst I quietly sniffle behind him. When we finally get to his car he opens the door to his expensive looking car and lets me in. Surprisingly it wasn’t a sports car but a luxury car that looked like it cost more than the average person’s yearly income. I better not let any tears fall onto the seat if that’s the case. Once San enters the car and closes the door behind him he turns in my direction and reaches for my hand “Okay, now tell me what happened?” Still teary eyes and without even letting silence run by that long I blurt out “Your mother knows about us San, the thing is she’s not happy about it.” San furrows his eyebrows “Wait? What? How?” I shrug blinking back my tears “From what she told me is that one of your associates let it slip.” San’s gaze darkens which is the look I was most afraid of seeing. “Who was it, I need names y/n..”

I shake my head my tears running down my cheeks while I slightly stumble. “I don’t know that’s just what she told me, she specifically said he referred to me as “the detective” and of course she pieced it together saying that you don’t usually go out of your way to gift anyone anything especially if it’s a woman. She said that when you asked her for advice on how find a dress she asked you who you were shopping for to which you simply responded “Someone special” which gave her a hint of what type of relationship it was” San stays silent gently rubbing his thumb on my hand whilst he listens. “She also said she didn’t want anything between us because she doesn’t want a repeat of what happened to your father which I understand and I guess to explain my wet hair she kind of threw her drink at me.” The air changed, he’s upset. I can feel it.

He clenches his jaw while he bounces his leg trying to dissipate the anger. He sits there in silence for a few seconds before he finally gets up and exits the car angrily. Terrified of making it worse I get out of the car and speed walk behind him “Please, don’t tell her anything..” He silently walks in the direction of his home most. I speed walk a little faster finally catching up to him immediately reaching for his hand with tears blurring my vision. “San! Please!” He comes to a halt once those words leave my lips and halts glaring at the Choi’s property, his eyes seething with anger. I stand in front of him and tighten my grip on his hand. “Please, let’s just go. It’s okay, I just need you to be with me that’s all..” San’s gaze stays fixed to the house in silence until he finally utters “I really am sorry y/n, I’m so sorry my mother treated you like this. You didn’t deserve this at all, you have no idea how much it pisses me off. I could have avoided this happening to you had I gone with you instead of obeying my mother. I trusted she wouldn’t pull something like this..” I walk into his arms, wrapping my arms around his waist and resting my head on his chest. “Don’t worry about it, we’ll figure it out. We don’t want to ruin your sister’s day do we?” San’s eyes remain angry and cold while holding onto me.

Once I manage to get him to get back in the car San practically glares ahead of him then turns on his car anger seething through him. “Put your seatbelt on we’re getting the fuck out of here.” Obeying him I immediately pull the seatbelt over myself clicking it into place “Where are we going?” He grumbles “Somewhere that’s not here.” He pulls out of the driveway and the tires screech as we drive through the gates and back to the long pathway leading out of the Choi’s property. I notice San’s tight grip on the shift gear making the veins in his arms pop out that’s when I reach over and rest my hand over his “I’ll be fine, it hurt but I’ll be okay. I’ve been treated much worse.” San looks ahead keeping his eyes on the road but still very clearly upset “You don’t understand y/n , all my life my mother’s been like a saint to me. In my eyes she could do no wrong because that’s how much respect I have towards her. The thing is this time she’s wrong, you’re nothing like Lee, you’re a godsend, someone I was so happy to have met even if they were all under the wrong circumstances. My angel.” I gently hug San’s arm whilst holding onto his hand “See? All it matters is that you recognize it.” I still hate that his mom ended up hating me, but I saw it coming. “I know, I just wish she saw what I see in you, the sweet, hardworking and strong woman that I fell for.” I gently squeeze his hand on the gear shift and kiss his cheek “She will.” She won’t, and I know that because I know you’ll go on to marry someone who fits your lifestyle.

“So Mr. Choi, where are we going?” He gives me a dimpled smile while keeping his eyes on the road “Hm, is there anywhere in particular you want to go angel?” I hum watching the cars ahead of us pass by “I’ll go wherever you go Sannie, just being with you makes me happy.” He quickly leans in and kisses my forehead before he says “Take a nap baby, you had a long day. I’ll wake you up when we get there hm?” I adjust in my seat resting my head against the head rest and cross my arms in front of my chest. As soon as I close my eyes close San lets out a groan “Why’d you let go of my hand?” I open my eyes and look over at a pouty San “What? I was going to leave you alone so you drive comfortably”

He lets go of the gear shift and takes my hand lacing his fingers between mine “Who said I wasn’t comfortable?” I giggle “Okay fine, my mistake my pouty boy.” He feigns a pout trying not to smile but completely fails. “Ah, look it’s your dimples! Look, you're smiling!” San chuckles “No I’m not!” I reach over with my free hand and poke his dimple “Oh but Mr. Choi you are look I just poked your dimple..” San keeps his eyes on the road then gently brings my hand up to his lips and kisses my hand “Go to sleep detective or I'm afraid I’ll end up crashing this car if you keep distracting me with your antics.” I slowly nod stifling a laugh “Fair enough I’ll sleep, it better be good.. ” I close my eyes and pull San’s hand onto my lap, until the car’s movement lulls me to sleep.

“Wake up angel, we’re here.” San gently strokes my arm while I slowly stir awake, the distant sounds of the ocean waves crashing against the shore. I open my eyes and see a smiling San by now he had removed his blazer now leaving him with his vest and dress shirt, his sleeves rolled up like usual while resting his forearm at the top of the car door way “Ah, look at you. Such a beauty..” He looks over at the sand then back down at my shoes “Hm, I think you might want to take those off.” I kick off my high heels and throw my fur cover up in the back seat. “You’re right high heels in sand aren’t fun.” He gently leans in and and kisses my forehead before he helps me step out of the car. “We came to the beach..” He nods gently squeezing my hand in his “We did, do you like it? I know it’s dark right now but you can still see pretty well from the lights” I look at the waves being delicately illuminated by the soft glow of the moon.

“I love it, but why exactly are we here?” San brings my hand up to his lips and kisses my hand while we both walk towards the beautiful ocean “I wanted to cheer you up, what happened tonight was my fault. I shouldn’t have let you go alone with my mother so I wanted to make up for it somehow even though it doesn’t undo everything that happened.” I stop us a few feet before the shore and I turn to face San, he looks down at me gently running his thumb along my cheek. I lean into his touch and hold his hand onto my face “Don’t worry. Whatever happens, happens. I’m used to hatred coming my way.” His brows inch together “You shouldn’t say that though. You should always have love coming your way because you deserve to be loved.”

I look up at him and examine his face, he’s so beautiful, just like his words. “Your words are so pretty Mr. Choi, you always manage to remind me why I love you so much.” San nervously chuckles then cups my face with one hand and pulls me close with the other “My words are only pretty to resemble the one who receives them.” He leans in and kisses me, his soft lips very tenderly latching onto mine whilst he holds me close to him. My hands slowly run up his chest while my feet slowly sink into the sand below me so I tip toe to reach around his neck, San notices this and breaks the kiss. “Having trouble baby?” I pout feeling a bit embarrassed “No..” San chuckles planting a kiss on my cheek “You’re so cute..” I pull the front of my dress up “I bet you can’t catch me..” He raises his eyebrow and smirks “I think I can.. Go ahead and get a head start..”

I stick my tongue out at him and run ahead along the beach as fast as I can while giggling knowing he was dumb enough to give me a head start. Just as quickly as I ran a gap between us he quickly catches up to me and carefully throws me over his shoulder as to not hurt my injured shoulder and slaps my butt. I loudly gasp playfully smacking his arm “San, stop!” He chuckles and slaps my butt again and defiantly squeezes it “This is fun actually. So soft.” Catching me off guard I squeal and cover my mouth embarrassed that someone might see us and pat his back. He gently lays me down on the sand the crawls on top of me and places his soft lips on mine.

We kiss for a few moments before he lays next to me and lets out a soft groan. I reach over to hold his hand and we both look up at the beautiful glittery sky where he says “Are you happy with me y/n?” I turn to look at San who was looking up at the sky his lips pressed together anticipating my answer. “Of course I am. You have no idea how happy I am every time I see you. Although we can’t really hang out like a normal couple I still really like being around you.” He holds back a smile and nods, kissing my hand for the nth time today.

“Good, because I wish you were with me a little longer. I don’t want you to go.. You’re the only one who doesn’t force me to wear the mask I have to keep on every single day since my father died.” I bite the inside of my lip and silently stare up at the sky, for a moment I don’t know how to answer. How can I? So I stay silent for a bit trying to figure out what to say, maybe.. “So, are you finally admitting that San likes to be San and not an evil criminal?” San chuckles and lets out a soft exhale “Yeah, I do like being San even if I try to hide it most of the time, it’s better than having enemies you didn’t know you had and having to keep your guard up every time you meet someone new.” I’m surprised he’s not a paranoid mess all the time with the amount of people constantly going after him.

“I’ll be your safe space. Always, just find me when you need me.” He lays down on his side propping his head on his hand “Be careful, I might kidnap you from the station and this time I won’t return you..” I boop his nose and giggle “You have to return me silly, or we won’t get rid of our mutual enemy.” He pulls my face close to his and before he pulls me in for a kiss he says “Screw that man, I want my girl by my side..” He kisses down to my neck burying his face and letting out a soft sigh. I gently stroke his now shorter dark hair without messing it up too much “You know what’s funny?” San lets out a soft hum and I continue “This dress is a vintage Mugler and I got whiskey on it and now a bunch of sand is all over it..”

San lifts his head and looks up at me “So?” I scoff and a dryly laugh “It’s ruined..” San gives me a dimpled smile “Don’t worry about it, I’ll buy it. As long as my angel is happy I don’t mind.” I blink in confusion and shock “But it’s expensive-” He gently covers my mouth “It’s fine, I promise. Besides it got ruined because of me so don’t feel bad.” He kisses my neck one last time before he lays his head back down on his arm “So, do you want to go home?” I exhaustedly hum and he gets up “Come on, I’ll carry you to the car.” I shake my head “No wait, it’s okay. I want to hold your hand again.” San helps me up raising his eyebrow “You really are a softie Detective..” I roll my eyes and lace my fingers between his. “You like it though.” San sucks his teeth “I do. Alot. Do it more often.” I glance up at him, the moonlight hitting his features at just the right angle making my heart skip a beat. “Yes Mr.Choi..” I got whiskey thrown in my face today but somehow San made me feel better.

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