#Claire really wanted to like that crazy lady | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lipglossanon · 11 months

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Turbo Lover

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masseuse!Leon S. Kennedy x fem!reader (one shot)

for the anon request who asked for masseuse Leon; I hope you enjoy it and thanks for your patience! 💜

Warnings: 18+ minors DNI, oral (f receiving), dirty talk, fingering

not proofread ✍️

Title from Turbo Lover by Judas Priest

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“Sarah swears by this place, so relax and enjoy yourself!”

You sigh, drumming your fingers on your steering wheel. After parking in front of a fairly ritzy massage parlor, you’ve been talking to you friend on speaker phone for fifteen minutes as she convinces you to actually go inside.

“I don’t know…”

“Please, you need to go get a massage; work has been stressful like crazy for you so do it. I’m telling you as your bestie.”

You laugh, “Okay, okay. I’ll go in and see what they have to offer.”

“See? It can’t hurt in looking.”

“I know. I’ll talk to you later.”

“Text me!”

And with that the resounding beep signals you’re sitting alone with your thoughts in the car. Sighing, you grab your bag and get out of the car. The front’s pretty minimalistic which seemed on brand for massage therapy you thought.

Walking inside, there’s the generic calming music playing over the speakers with potted plants dotted all around. It smells wonderful though, like some sort of airy floral scent that you just can’t place. You make your way to the front desk and smile at the lady behind the counter.

“Hi,” she smiles at you, “my name’s Sandy, how may I help you today?”

“Hi, I uh don’t have an appointment or anything but I was wondering if you had any openings?”

“Let me check,” she turns her attention to the computer to the side and quickly types, “looks like I have an opening with Claire in ten minutes if that’s okay?”

“Sure.”

“Perfect!” she shines another smile your way, “just fill out this paper for me stating your consent and if you have any allergies we should know in regard to the oils and lotions we use. You can also ask for a chaperone at any time if you feel uncomfortable being alone.”

“Thanks,” you return her smile, a little more at ease.

You quickly fill out the empty spaces and hand the paper back to Sandy.

“Great, just please have a seat and Claire will lead you back shortly. Would you like a water or anything while you wait?”

“Oh uh no but thank you.”

“You’re most welcome.”

You sit down on the nearest chair and pull out your phone to kill the time. Bringing up the ebook you’ve been reading, you easily lose track of the time.

“I’m so sorry, ma’am!”

Your attention is pulled up to a blue eyed, handsome man standing between the desk and you, looking sheepish and apologetic.

“Pardon?”

“Claire was called away on a family emergency, so I’m her replacement. If you’d like you can reschedule to be with her.”

You feel like a fish out of water so you just shrug, “I mean I’m fine with it if that’s okay? If I need to, I can reschedule—“

“No that’s fine,” he smiles relieved, “I just know sometimes people get upset if they come for one of us specifically and don’t get them.”

“Oh,” you place your phone in your bag and stand, “well I’m fine honestly, this is my first time here actually.”

“Really?” the smile he gives you is nearly blinding, “I’ll make sure to make it a great experience.”

“The name’s Leon, by the way,” he turns and leads you down a hallway off to the side.

You feel a little warm as Leon walks in front of you. Since you didn’t give it much thought, you really didn’t realize you could have such a hot guy giving you a massage. His biceps stretch his sleeves while his broad shoulders and back strain against the shirt fabric. Your eyes drag from his sandy hair down to his tight ass. Praying for good luck, you just hope you don’t embarrass yourself in front of him.

Leon pulls open a door near the end of the hall and gestures for you to enter. He follows you inside and points out where you can sit your bag and shoes.

“I can step out if you want to take off your shirt and pants then lay down face first on the table; but, if that’s uncomfortable for you, it’s 100% fine to stay fully dressed and we can get started.”

You glance over at the massage table and then around the pretty spacious room taking in the counter full of oils, lotions, heating stones, and towels.

You turn back to Leon to find him watching you, his face soft and earnest.

“I think I’ll get undressed.”

In for a penny, in for a pound.

“Okay,” he nods, “you can just set your clothes on the chair next to the table if you’d like. Then once you lay down you can pull that towel up and over your body.”

He steps out of the room and firmly closes the door. You pause for a moment and once you’re sure the door’s completely shut, you undress and lay your clothes off to the side. Climbing up onto the table, you lay flat like he suggested and lay the towel over you.

A few minutes pass and then Leon knocks on the door, cracking it open so he can ask, “Is it okay for me to come in?”

“You’re good.”

He steps in smiling brightly again.

“Great, since you booked Claire, she usually does the 60 minute full body massage, is there anywhere you don’t want touched or injuries I should know about?”

You shake your head, “Nope.”

“Alright,” he steps out of your line of sight and you can hear him shuffling through items.

“Just let me know if you get too hot, cold, thirsty, or just uncomfortable and I’ll do whatever I can to accommodate.”

“Thank you, Leon,” you murmur.

“Of course,” his voice is warm like his hands when they come down on your shoulders, slick with some scented oil that smells like coconut.

He asks you simple questions as he works: what you do for work, favorite places to eat in the city, any fun hobbies in your downtime, etc.

He pulls you into easy conversation and has lulled you into state of complete relaxation by the time he’s finished.

He curses under his breath and you hum questioningly.

He sounds a little embarrassed, “Well, I got carried away and lost track of time. But I swear you won’t get charged extra.”

“S’okay,” you laugh, feeling gooey and comfortable, “definitely worth it. Best I’ve felt in ages. I hope I didn’t cut into your other client’s time.”

“Oh no, I was headed home for the day when Claire asked me to cover.”

“If I would’ve known that I would’ve rescheduled,” your tone turns pouty, “Leon, I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be,” he chuckles, smoothing his palms down your back, “this was really enjoyable. Most people come in and completely ignore my attempts at conversation.”

“No way,” you’re affronted on his behalf.

His hands glide down your sides making you sigh, “Yep, just not interested I guess. But you were wonderful.”

You’re glowing from the inside at his words, always a sucker for praise.

“No, you were wonderful,” you finally get out, “I was kinda nervous. But you got a repeat customer.”

He laughs delightedly, “What a bonus.”

You giggle and squirm as his fingers dig into your lower back, “Well I can get ready and take off.”

He digs his thumbs in right above your tailbone making your hips arch up as you moan.

Feeling overwhelmingly embarrassed, you tug on the towel, “Oh god, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to—“

Leon laughs, “Don’t apologize, it happens more than you think.”

“Oh,” the embarrassment still makes you feel like folding in on yourself, wishing you were anywhere but here.

“Besides,” he presses you flat down onto the table again, hands quickly returning to where they were, “sounded pretty good to me.”

His thumbs repeat the action, digging into the tender spot of your lower back making you keen and rock up.

“There we go,” he coos, “just relax, I got you.”

His hands drag down to your inner thighs, massaging the muscles.

“Leon,” you whimper making him groan.

“I got you honey,” his thumbs glide up from your inner thighs up to your panty covered pussy, stroking your slit through the damp material.

“Think you need an extra special service for being so goddamn sweet,” he murmurs.

He stops to grab the band of your panties, “Is this okay?”

“Uh huh,” you nod, brain already mush and he hasn’t really done much.

He quickly pulls your panties off, tossing them over to your clothes. Pushing the towel up until it’s pooled on your lower back, he caresses your bare skin softly. He pushes your thighs open wider.

“Fuck, pretty little pussy, need to lick her open, see if she’s as sweet as you.”

He pulls you down closer to the edge of the table, so he can get between your legs easier. He spreads open your cunt and spits on your hole.

You keen at the feeling and he does it again.

“Ready?”

“Please, Leon.”

Without any other preamble, Leon buries his face into your pussy with a groan. His tongue laps up the spit to thrust it into your drippy hole. He hums and drags his mouth over to your clit, suckling the sensitive bud until you’re squirming.

He pulls away and twists your hips, “Fuck, baby, turn over for me.”

You quickly comply, spreading your thighs again but he folds your legs and pushes them up as he goes back down on you.

“Oh god,” you wrap your arms around your thighs to hold yourself open for him.

He shows his appreciation for that by sliding two fingers into your wet, fluttering walls searching for your g-spot. With a sharp whine, you rock down into his hand once he finds it.

His eyes crinkle with a smile but it’s hard to tell when he’s tonguing up into your hole along with his fingers. He pulls away and spits on your clit making your hips jump up.

“Fucking sex on legs, coming in here all sweet,” he growls as he goes back to sucking and kissing on your swollen clit, “like I haven’t been wanting to taste this hot cunt inches from my fucking hands.”

“Fuck, Leon,” you mewl, eyes fluttering as he rubs against the spongy spot at the front of your pussy over and over and over.

“Want you to cum all over my mouth,” he lashes his tongue against you clit before sliding it across your pussy lips, “get me soaked.”

He sucks your pussy lips into his mouth then moves to nipping at your thigh before drifting back to your sensitive clit.

“Fattest fucking pussy,” he groans, sucking your hard bud into his mouth making you cry out, hands shakily letting go of your legs to tangle in his hair.

“Oh ‘m so close, gonna cum,” you whimper, rocking down into him, holding his head against your pussy.

He groans, eyes flicking up to yours as he fingers you harder and faster, mouth never letting up as he sucks and licks over your clit.

“Oh, oh, oh, fuck,” your thighs tense and try to close around his shoulders as your back bows, pussy gushing slick as he lets you ride out your orgasm on his fingers and face.

You know you must be pulling his hair too hard, but you can’t stop humping against his mouth as he extends your climax with his fingers on your g-spot. Slick is coating his face and jaw when he finally pulls away, your orgasm ebbing into pleasant aftershocks.

You laugh feeling high on endorphins, “That was amazing.”

“Oh,” you raise up on your elbows, “what about—“

You waves you off with a grin, “What do you think I was doing with my other hand?”

You bite your lip as he stands, spent cock bobbing as he cleans off with a nearby towel. A pulse of want blazes through you.

“Next time, honey,” he laughs seeing your glazed expression and tucks himself away.

“Think of this as an appetizer,” he winks, helping you up and redressing yourself.

“I’ll definitely be back,” you laugh, kissing his cheek as he holds the door open for you.

“I hope so.”

He gives you a short wave when you make it to the end of the hallway. There’s a new lady behind the desk, Carolyn, and she’s more than happy to book you in for Leon’s next available appointment.

#masseuse!leon s kennedy #masseuse!leon s kennedy x fem!reader #masseuse!leon s kennedy smut #masseuse!leon s kennedy x fem!reader smut #lipglossanon #lipglossmasterlist #leon s kennedy x you #leon s kennedy #leon s kennedy x fem!reader #fem!reader #leon kennedy x reader smut #leon s kennedy smut

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bitbugbites-re · 8 months

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𝙳𝙰𝙼𝚂𝙴𝙻 // 𝔠𝔞𝔯𝔩𝔬𝔰 𝔬𝔩𝔦𝔳𝔢𝔦𝔯𝔞 𝔵 𝔯𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔢𝔯

As summer comes to an end, you’re desperate to get some pool time in while you still can. However, since it’s now October, you’re pretty much out of luck. Luckily for you, there’s an indoor pool at the Y. Not to mention, it comes along with a cute pool boy!

a03 link

word count: ~8.6k

gender: fem! reader

cw: NSFW, FLUFF // drowning // ktober

a/n: literally supposed to be reading the bible for class rn but god be damned, this lady knows how to write erotic fiction !!!

p.s. -- if you're only interested in the smut, you can scroll down until you reach the thin black bar lololol

You’re not crazy. You just want to swim.

Frowning, you stared down your phone as you read the most recent messages from your friends. They were replying to the flurry of texts you had just sent.

The first response read: “Girl. Lol.”

The next was: “You didn’t think about this in September???”

And the last response wasn’t even a response. It was a TikTok link leading to a video about things to do while in Vegas. You didn’t even live in Vegas. You’re on the East Coast.

You sighed, placing the phone down for a second before popping a Keurig cup into the proper machine, waiting for it to finish warming the water. When the buttons lit up, you pressed 12oz and leaned over the counter, one of your hands resting on your cheek. With your free hand, you picked your phone back up and re-read your initial texts as you listened to the liquid pour a straight line into your mug.

“u guys”

“I wanted to go swimming at least once this summer but I forgot”

“do u think there are any pools still open??? I don’t even care if its cold im desperate”

Yeah, so maybe you are a little crazy after all. It was October, and there was no way that even one pool would be open. You felt a little defeated, your desperation morphing into disappointment. Suddenly, the whirring of the Keurig slowed before spitting out the last bits of bitterly strong tea, a burning droplet jumping out and landing on your hand. You wondered if that was the Keurig’s way of calling you crazy as well.

Shaking your hand before wiping it with the opposite sleeve of your shirt, you stood up straight and leaned your back against the counter. With your phone in hand, you tapped out a string of shushing emojis in the group chat. Fuck it. You’re crazy and you’re proud.

You then pressed the video on, “Fun Things To Do In Vegas” which was accompanied by three exclamation points and a couple of emojis with their tongues out. The emojis implication almost made you a little scared of what “things” were going to be listed in the TikTok.

Before you could actually watch the video, though, a notification from your group chat popped up. It was from the friend who sent the Vegas video – they likely just now actually read the chat.

“Claire: Wait, what about the YMCA near your house? Doesn’t it have an indoor pool? Probably not the same kind of swimming that u were thinking of, but it’d be swimming lol.”

Oh shit. That’s a good idea. – Is what you both thought and simultaneously typed in response. Not missing a beat, you opened the search engine app on your phone and looked up the YMCA closest to you. Just under the images (which mostly consisted of it’s pool, oddly enough), you noticed that it was open from 5 A.M. to 9 P.M.

It was only 6:30 P.M. right now. Meaning, it was still open.

You switched back to the group chat’s tab and typed away.

“guess who’s going to the pool tonight”

“(it’s me)”

“anyone wanna come with?”

Surprisingly, the responses flooded in pretty quickly. They said:

“Claire: I wish, but I’ve got a class in an hour. I knew it was a bad decision to pick a class at 7 at night smh. Can’t ever meet up with u guys on weekends anymore :/”

“Ada: Can’t. Lots of work. Maybe next time.”

“Jill: Sorry, I’m at work right now. Had to pick up my coworker’s shift again. How about on the weekend?”

You groaned out a whine, throwing a mini-tantrum. You didn’t really want to go alone, because what fun would that be? Nonetheless, you didn’t want to wait for the weekend either. It was rare you guys ever actually had the same schedule, so you were sure the plans would just end up getting canceled or be pushed back even further. You’d just have to go alone.

You typed out a message informing your friends of your plan before placing the phone down with a heavy hand. Dragging your way down the narrow hall to your room, you plopped yourself down on your knees, opening up the dresser drawer that stored your bathing suits. You had an idea of which one you were going to wear, as it was a black one-piece with a deep-wired V down the front – It was appealing in the way that it wasn’t too revealing, but not unattractively modest either. Perfect for a venue that was family-friendly and not as free as the beach.

After a couple of minutes of rummaging, you slumped down to a hunch and huffed. You couldn’t seem to find the swimsuit. Not even after pulling out each bathing suit one by one. You searched, and searched, and searched, but it was nowhere to be found.

You caved to your frustration and picked out a bikini instead. You didn’t have any other swimsuits, so it was either a simplistic bikini or nothing. And after all that hullabaloo in the group chat, you were not choosing nothing.

Changing quickly, you then grabbed your things and headed for the car. It was now already after 6:45 P.M., and you were running out of time before the Y would close.

Soon enough, you were turning your car wheel to pull into the YMCA’s parking lot. You found a spot fairly fast and quickly put the car in park, removing your keys from the hole with a twist and pull of the wrist. As the car’s engine whirred, shutting off, you observed the parking lot. You noticed there weren’t too many cars. Hopefully, most of the people would be in the gym or another section of the Y and not the pool, you thought to yourself.

Stepping out of your car, you held onto the handle as you got dusted in the face by the wind, your hair flinging all over the place. The wind was pretty bad, but the chill alone was enough for you to huddle your arms over your body before running into the building. You were starting to regret coming to the pool so late in the day, especially in October, nonetheless. At least the air smelled nice, though; there must’ve been a place nearby having a bonfire, as there was a heavy waft of burning wood.

You pulled the heavy glass door open, practically swinging it with all your might, and walked in heaving. Maybe you should be going to the gym instead of the pool – how could you be out of breath from only a short jog across the parking lot?

No matter, you walked up to the counter and paid for a day pass. You got to go in free since you’re a first-time visitor, although you felt a little guilty considering it was going to be wasted on a less than two-hour excursion. It was probably fine though – you don’t think you’d need to go to the Y again after this, anyway.

Walking through the building, you admired the decorative furniture and monotone walls contrasted with bright accent walls and signs. It had a clean, modern look and you were pretty impressed by how well-kept it was; it must’ve been hard for the janitors who worked there considering it was a pretty big community establishment. You appreciated how spotless they were able to keep it with this knowledge in mind.

Soon, you found your way to the pool after getting lost and asking a very tired-looking staff member. You almost felt bad interrupting them – their dark undereye mixed with the lighting made them look as if they were ready to be taken out back and put down. Not that you blame them – they must’ve been here for a while now. You were sure you’d look like that too if you had to work until nine at night.

As you pushed the door to the pool open, you were immediately exposed to the hot, humid air. Typical of a pool. You had to admit, though, it felt pretty good as compared to the cold breeze outside. Besides, you probably wouldn’t feel this type of heat again unless you decided to put your heater on full blast in winter. Although that would turn your room into what was practically an oven and not a fun chlorine-smelling paradise – so maybe it wasn’t the same after all.

You observed the area, your eyes immediately landing on the few kids splashing around in the middle of the pool. Great. In situations like these, you tend to sit on the side of the stairs to the pool – but that spot seemed to be occupied by a group of older men and women, so you crossed that option off. You didn’t feel like getting dragged into a conversation about retirement homes, or grandchildren, or…stuff. You weren’t really sure what the elderly chatted about.

Admitting defeat, you decided to just go sit on one of the pool chairs instead. You figured you’d just wait it out, betting that both the kids and the elderly wouldn’t stay for much longer. It was almost pitch-black outside, and seeing both children and old people at night was practically like spotting a leprechaun next to a pot of gold, you thought.

As soon as you sat and plopped your stuff down in the middle-most chair, you took in a breath and looked around. And that’s when you saw him.

You swore your heart stopped beating for a second. He was gorgeous.

Most of the men you came across on a day-to-day basis looked downright horrendous, dressed in sweats and backward caps with dumb labels like “GymRat,” so to see a fit man with a haircut that suited his looks and facial scruff that looked like it was actively trimmed was like seeing that your younger sibling didn’t pick all of the marshmallows out of your favorite cereal and eat them. A blessing, that’s what this is, you thought.

You figured he was the lifeguard, as he was sitting in the lifeguard’s chair, leaning back with one leg dangling and the other using his heel to support his placement on the seat. He had one arm lazing on the armrest, while the other held his tilted head in place as he watched the kids dash up waves of water at one another. Every once in a while, his lips would curve into an amused smile, and he’d shake his black curls out of his face, eyes not straying from the children at play. Cute, you thought.

Watching him for a while longer, you noticed three things about him:

His eyes stayed trained on the kids in the pool, not the elderly. Every once in a while, if they made a sudden movement, he’d sit up, as if he were ready to leap from the tall chair at a moment's notice.

He seemed to be pretty proud of his body, or at least his looks. His posture was confident in nature and he never covered up any part of his body with his arms.

He had a charismatic personality, or at the very least, was on good terms with the janitors. Every time they passed by, he’d quickly turn his head, see who it was, and make a comment of some sort. He always had a grin on his face as he did, and never showed a bit of discourtesy nor dislike, even if the janitor didn’t return the energy.

Of course, those weren’t the only things you noticed about him. You also noticed he had a great body. Did you mention he had a great body? He had a great body.

He didn’t even need to be shirtless for you to tell. His arms and thighs were fat with muscle, his calves fit for a marathon runner, and his chest with mounds big enough that you wouldn’t be surprised if he knew how to flex them one at a time, as a kind of party trick.

You also could tell that he was a pretty hairy guy, not that you were complaining. You liked that in a man. You wondered what it would feel like to run your hands down his arm as his legs brushed up against the skin of–

And then he looked in your direction. He saw you. As you were at your apex of wanting to eat him alive.

Your face burned with embarrassment as his eyes met yours, and before you made a fool out of yourself, you looked away. Grabbing your phone which now felt sticky from the humidity, you pulled up the group chat, pretending to be busy.

“guys”

“there’s a rly cute lifeguard here and he caught me staring”

“im so embarrassed”

You stared at the screen for a while, waiting for your friends to respond, but none came.

Damn. Why is it that whenever you need a distraction, no one is active?

It didn’t take long after for you to give up, slinking your phone back down. You picked up a book instead, sneakily glancing up at the lifeguard once more to see if he was still looking your way. He wasn’t. His eyes were trained back on the kids, which surprisingly, made you feel a little disappointed.

You read for a while until eventually, you received a notification.

“Ada: Lol. You have a crush?”

“Ada: You should go up to him.”

The longer you considered Ada’s suggestion, the more your heart raced. You seriously considered it for a moment, but abruptly shut it down after thinking about how weird it actually might be.

“I can’t do that”

“I don’t even know what I’d say”

Ada replied almost immediately.

“Ada: Then make him want to go up to you.”

It wasn’t bad advice. You thought about it for a bit, staring at the paved concrete below your pool chair. An ant scurried on by, passing your left foot, and once it was out of sight, you snapped out of your daze and returned your head to a forward position.

Once you did, you noticed the lifeguard’s gaze on you. He was looking at you first this time.

As soon as your eyes met, he flung his head to the side, pretending to rub his neck. It was pretty awkward to watch, as his hands moved aimlessly and unpurposeful, as there was really no physical reason for him to need to touch his neck. It was easy to tell that he was only doing it to play off the fact that he was caught staring, too.

His attraction – or at the very least, interest, was mutual, then. You felt a fire of confidence rising in your chest, and you now knew how you’d get him to come up to you first.

You stood up from your chair, keeping him in your peripheral view, pretending to dust yourself off before seeing his head move back in your direction. Good, he was watching you again.

Very slowly, you began to remove the regular clothes that rested atop your bikini. Once fully stripped to your swimsuit, you made sure to fold your clothes neatly. After each article was folded, you would bend over, your behind facing his direction, placing it flatly onto the pool chair. Each time you did this, you couldn’t tell if he was looking, but you were sure that he wouldn’t have been able to resist at minimum, a glance.

Once done, you began to walk towards the water. You felt a little conscious in your stride, your step heavy, but also determined to play it cool. When approaching the stairs of the pool, you grabbed onto the accompanying handlebar, creating a divide in the water as you were further submerged. You passed the elderly group, and once they thought you were out of earshot, one exclaimed, “I wish I still had a young body like that.” The others chuckled, agreeing with the notion. You blushed and continued your journey to an empty spot in the pool.

Wading through the water, you then came up near the area where the kids were playing. You went to the side opposite the lifeguard’s chair and leaned against the wall. It was a little noisy – no, very noisy being near the kids. On top of that, you were occasionally hit with splatters of water every time they tried to mimic professional swimmers, but at least your plan was working. You think.

You weren’t really sure because you were too scared to look back up at the lifeguard. But that’s OK. All girlbosses have their weak moments.

While lost in thought trying to figure out your next step on alluring the lifeguard (as, for some reason, he wasn’t already proposing marriage and offering a bride-dowry to your parents consisting of 400 sheep, 200 goats, fifty pieces of silver, a years’ worth of unleavened bread, and seven years’ labor), you noticed two children playing roughly, one a bone-thin blonde, and the other a brunette missing one of his front teeth.

The blonde child was in a small floaty, laughing as his friend tried to swim under the tube and get inside of it with him. Every time he dived under the water, the boy would swerve his donut-shaped float, swimming a few inches away, laughing. This went on for a while, until eventually, the blonde boy switched his tactic and began pushing his friend’s head away from his float while under the water.

You grew concerned as you watched, knowing they were starting to get a little too carried away, and you looked around for their parents. You then spotted a couple of adults on the pool chairs near the towel rack, busy conversing about something you couldn’t hear. You weren’t sure what to do and turned your head back to the kids, and then there was a stifled thump.

Your heart started to race as the blonde boy started to look worried, noticing his friend wasn’t coming up out of the water. You noticed what was happening when the child leaned over his tube, holding his reddened elbow, freezing in place.

The toothless boy was knocked out.

The child with scrawny arms somehow managed to deal a blow hard enough for his friend to lose consciousness. He whipped his head around to get the lifeguard’s attention, desperately screaming, “Help! Help!”

The lifeguard was already halfway down the chair even before the boy started yelling. It seemed like his gaze had been so focused on the children earlier because he knew something like this was bound to happen.

The child was now sobbing, looking around for his parents, of which the whole group was now running over to see what the commotion was about.

You saw the kid whose body started to sink downwards, your heartbeat stammering in your chest.

You had to do something.

Launching yourself forward, you began to swim to the child nearby. As you did, you heard the lifeguard jump in the pool, a loud splash of water mixing in with the cries of the children’s parents.

You made it to the boy under the water first, diving straight down. Once you got a hold of him, you yanked his arm up, pulled him to your body, and positioned his behind on your arm, so that his head would immediately be above the water.

Both of you came up, and you gasped for air, blinking rapidly so that you could see. The lifeguard was right next to you, hurriedly taking the boy from your arms, rushing him toward the edge of the pool, and plopping him down on the concrete. You followed over, as did pretty much everyone at the pool, watching the lifeguard push desperately at his chest.

After a short while, which actually felt like forever, the boy gasped, throwing up the water that was in his lungs. The lifeguard helped the boy sit up a little, rubbing his back as he continued his violent coughs and sobs. “It’s okay, it’s okay,” he whispered. “I got’cha, bud.”

Once the brunette had finally gotten a hold of himself, he ran to his parents, who held him and began petting his head. The other parents, who seemed to all be friends, began thanking the lifeguard profusely on both the boy's and his parent’s behalf.

The lifeguard was crouched, slightly hunched over, breathing heavily, simply shaking his head to assure them it was okay. “Just doin’ my job,” he smiled despite the apparent stress on his face, “Actually, you should be thanking the kind lady over there.”

His gaze moved from the worry-stricken parents to you. “She’s the one who saved his life.”

You blushed, your eyes moving from him, then to the parents, not sure what to say. You didn’t think you did that much.

The parents came up to you and began thanking you as well, telling you how brave it was of you to dive in after the boy. You were only able to stammer out a couple of “it’s no problem’s” and “thank you’s” in return.

Soon, almost everyone left the pool, deciding they had witnessed enough of the pool for the night. Even the group of elderly packed their things and headed towards the changing room.

You too had figured it was probably time to go, forgetting your entire plan of romancing the man who had just previously given you all the credit when he was the one to bring the boy back from unconsciousness.

However, as you turned and began walking back to your stuff, the lifeguard ran up to your side, trying to get your attention. “Hey, hey.”

You turned to face him, stopping in place. “Um–yes?” you said, a little taken aback at his greeting, not expecting him to have started a conversation.

“Ah–oh,” he said, tripping on his words. “I just wanted to thank you, for saving the kid.”

You smiled at his words. “Sure,” you said. You then tilted your head, quirking a brow. “I didn’t really do much, though. You did more than me, so–”

He quickly cut you off, a tint of excitement in his voice. “No, no! If you hadn’t gotten him out, he would’ve been under even longer. Every second matters–you saved his life. I only got the water ‘outta his airway.”

You blushed a little at his enthusiasm for your act of heroism. “Well, uh, thank you–”

“You were so cool,” he said, and you swore you felt your heart explode.“Thanks,” you mumbled out, and soon enough, silence grew between the two of you. You were trying to figure out what to say back.

“Well, I should–” the lifeguard started to say, turning his body to leave. You scrambled for a response back, not wanting him to go.

“You were cool, too.” You said, your voice sounding a little wobbly. You felt your face start to grow red, your blood rising in degrees with every millisecond that passed.

The lifeguard seemed shy now, too, raising an arm behind his head, rubbing at his neck like he did earlier. “Oh–really?”

“Y-yeah,” you breathed out.

There was silence once more before the lifeguard laughed a little and held out his hand to you. “I’m Carlos. It’s nice to meet ‘ya, Phelps.”

You took his hand, shaking it gently. He had a good handshake, and his hand felt huge in your own. “Phelps?” you said, not really understanding why he was referring to you as that.

“You know, Michael Phelps? The swimmer guy? Because you dove in to get the kid?”

You let out a long “ooooooh” as soon as you recognized what he was talking about, and laughed in response. “Pretty rude to call a lady Michael Phelps, dont’cha think?”

He laughed back before running his hand through his hair – which, miraculously, was able to stay dry since you were the one to reach the kid underwater. “Sorry, pretty lady. What should I call you then?”

You blushed a little upon hearing him call you “pretty lady,” a cheeky grin growing on your face. “You can call me Y/N. Or pretty lady, too. I don’t mind either.”

He laughed, shaking his head in an amused manner. He placed his hands on his hips, and tilted his head back a little, grinning. “Okay, pretty lady. How old are you? You in college?”

You nodded your head. “Yeah. What about you?”

“Yep. I’m a senior. You?”

You replied, and from there, your conversation began to take off. You talked about things as small as favorite colors, to medium things like what your majors were, to big things like how many dogs were too many dogs for a person to have. You both seemed to click really well, and you had to admit, you had never met someone as easy to talk to before Carlos.

As you both started passionately debating on whether or not the pool slide was white or beige, an announcement sounded over the speakers.

“Attention guests, the YMCA will be closing in five minutes. Please make sure to gather all your things and head to the exit. Those who are still in the building after closing will be escorted outside by staff. Thank you for choosing the YMCA, and we hope to see you again soon!”

You and Carlos looked at one another, not sure what to say.

You realized then, that all this time, you’d been keeping Carlos from leaving when he probably could’ve packed up early for the night. Embarrassed, you jumped up from where you both had been sitting. At some point during your conversation (before its interruption), you both had sat at the edge of the pool, your legs resting in the water.

“Shit, I’m sorry for keeping you–” you said. “I’ll go get my things so you can leave–I’m so sorry–”

As you turned in a hurry to go get your stuff, you felt Carlos’ hand rest on your shoulder, stopping you. “Hey, hey–you’re fine, you’re fine.”

You jumped a little at the contact, your face turning red, and once you turned to face Carlos, you noticed he had realized what he had done.

You were wearing a swimsuit. You had on practically next to nothing. And he, a stranger, was touching you.

He pulled his hand back, going to rub his neck, but pausing as he began to raise it. It seemed like he didn’t know what to do with himself now. “Uh–”

“Sorry, shit–I didn’t mean to–uh,” he stumbled. “Was that weird?”

You took in a deep breath and averted your gaze. “No. No, you’re fine.”

“Are–are you sure?” he pushed.

“Yes, yes, you’re fine. Don’t worry.”

“Well, I’m worrying. You can tell me if–”

You sighed and looked him in his eyes. “It’s fine. I liked it.”

Upon hearing the words come out of your mouth, you froze. Your frustration with his reluctance to accept your assurance must have gotten to you, as you didn’t mean to say the last part.

“You liked it?” he said. He seemed a little surprised, with a mix of something else. You weren’t quite sure what.

“Um. Yeah–yeah.” you asserted. And then there was silence again.

Unable to take the awkward tension, you cracked a joke. “I’m flattered by your desperation to keep me from leaving. Very, uh–flattering touch.”

Turns out you weren’t very good at jokes.

Nonetheless, he seemed to like it. He chuckled a little, which made your heartbeat increase in pace. He seemed to have good humor even in cringy situations. You liked that.

“Well, I’m glad you’re flattered, at least. I’d do it again if I needed to.” He smiled.

You blushed, and that’s when your mouth started to move on its own. “Then do it.”

“What?” he said, a little surprised.

“I’m on my way to leave. The building closes in…” You checked the clock on the wall. “...a minute or less. If you don’t want me to leave, then touch me again.” You looked up at him expectantly.

He paused for a minute and it was clear he was debating on what to do. You waited, watching him shift in place – going to rub his neck again, as he had been doing whenever he was nervous.

Suddenly, it was 9 P.M. and the announcement over the loudspeaker played, declaring it was closing time and all the guests who hadn’t left yet needed to begin their way on exiting the building. Your heart dropped a little, taking his lack of response before the loudspeaker’s interjection as a “no.”

You smiled weakly, taking the hint. You turned to grab your things off the pool chair and spoke. “Well, it was nice to–”

In a heartbeat, he grabbed your shoulder with a sense of determination, spinning you towards him. He placed one hand on your hip, pulling you in, before kissing you with wild passion.

You felt the roughness of his stubble first and then the softness of his lips. Slowly, you closed your eyes, kissing him back.

He was a fast kisser, constantly changing the way he sucked at your lips, alternating between tilting his head to the side so that he could press his mouth into yours, and tilting his head downwards so that he could pull your mouth while you struggled to stay connected. He was constantly desperate for more access as if he wanted to make sure you felt him all over your lips, not one spot untouched.

Your hands rested on his soaking wet shirt that clung to his skin from when he had jumped into the pool to save the kid. It felt a little cold, but you got used to it as your kiss continued.

The only thing the two of you could hear was each other’s heavy breathing, along with the smack of your lips as they collided. That was, until, the sound of the pool door opened.

Both you and Carlos separated immediately, your lips feeling cold at the sudden touch of air, missing the warmth of Carlos’ own warm lips. You did, however, still feel the tingle left from his feverish push-and-pull play.

With about a two-foot distance now between the two of you, you both looked over to see what the noise was exactly.

In walked an older woman, one you would’ve guessed was in her early 60’s. Her hair was completely gray, resting in a shaggy bun with little hairs falling out. She looked rough – and ready to go home for the night.

“H–hey, Mary. You almost done for the night?”

She eyed him suspiciously before replying. “Wouldn’t that be a damn miracle.”

She continued to go about her business, and you felt awkward watching their conversation.

Suddenly, Carlos’ head shot towards you and then back towards Mary. “Oh, uh, I was just about to escort this…young, damsel-in-distress out of the building. She didn’t know where the exit was, you see.”

You shot him a dirty look as if saying, “I know where the exit is.”

Mary didn’t seem to care. She simply took the mop out of the water in the cleaning cart and plopped it on the floor. It made an uncomfortably loud squelch sound in an otherwise silent room. “Mmm.”

Carlos grabbed your things for you, and put an arm around your shoulder. “Well, I’ve gotta maintain my status as a gentleman, so…we’ll be on our way! See ‘ya later, Mary!”

It sounded like she mumbled out an “I hope not,” but you weren’t too sure.

The two of you walked quickly to the door, and once it shut behind you, Carlos let go of your arm.

“Well, that was, uh–something?” He smiled, still holding onto your clothes and other items.

“Yeah,” you said, before looking up at him with an amused smile. “Damsel-in-distress, huh?”

He laughed and shuffled on his feet. “What, you the type that doesn’t like to be saved?”

You smirked. “Maybe I am, maybe I’m not. You wanna find out?”

He grinned as he looked at you, raising a brow in an amused fashion. “Only because you make it sound so alluring.”

After hearing his reply, you closed in on his body, wrapping your arms around his neck. You stood on your tippy-toes, whispering in his ear as your cheek brushed against his lengthy hair and scratchy stubble. “I’ll show you every part of me that you want, but you need to take me somewhere private first.”

You pulled back, and you saw that he was grinning. It was evident in his eyes alone that he was excited, although, there was a mix of something else, too. The other kind of excitement, perhaps – it was a very lustful look.

He held out his hand, and as you took it, he led you down the hall. You both laughed a little at the situation, adrenaline coursing through your veins. It was cold in the building, probably mostly because you still only had on a bikini, but you weren’t too focused on it. The warmth of Carlos’ hand and the anticipation for what you both were about to do were the main things on your mind right now.

Soon enough, Carlos pulls you into a room, and you look around, observing it. It was a locker room, although you hadn’t noticed whether it was for men, women, or unisex. You figured it didn’t matter all that much, though – it’s not likely that anyone would walk in.

Carlos twirled you around, pulling you into his chest again. He looked down at you, smiling before leaning down and kissing you.

This time, his kiss was soft and exploratory. He took his time, not making any wild moves, although still leading the pace like he did the first time he kissed you. Maybe you were a damsel-in-distress after all – it was starting to seem like you were swept up in his game with no escape.

After a while, he broke away from the kiss, looking at you with gentle eyes.

“I don’t have a key to lock the door. Someone could walk in. Is that okay?”

You laughed a little, smiling. “Let them walk in.”

He chuckled back, speaking in a soft voice as he pushed a strand of your hair behind your ear. “You’re a bold girl, huh?”

Before you could respond, his lips were back on yours. His hands moved down your back before interlacing his fingers, keeping you pressed to him.

The kiss you shared was slow again at first, but it didn’t take long for it to pick up again. At the apex of your kiss, Carlos pulled his lips away, moving them to the corner of your mouth, to your cheek, and finally to your neck. It tickled at first due to his facial hair, and you let out a small laugh, but eventually, it started to feel really good.

He found all of the sweet spots on your neck, sucking and licking, desperate to hear the pleased moans that escaped you every time he touched you the way you liked. Once he seemed to want more, he began to travel further down your body. You smiled when he ventured over your breasts, gasped when he reached your stomach, and paused when he kissed your pelvic area.

Petting his hair, you spoke. “Carlos?”

“Hmm?” He mumbled, looking up at you. He was waiting for you to give the go-ahead.

You felt a little nervous asking, but you knew it was important. “Have you been tested recently?”

He paused, thinking. “I haven’t been sexually active for a while, so I haven’t gone to get a test any time recent. The last time I did, though, there were no concerns.” He then picked up your leg, throwing it over his broad shoulder. He placed a kiss on your inner thigh. “Is that okay?”

You nodded your head and returned to running your fingers through his curls. He smiled up at you and started kissing through the bottom piece of your swimsuit again.

Once he figured he had done enough teasing, he removed your leg off his shoulder, slipping the bottoms down. You stepped out of it, and he picked your leg up again, placing it in its former position on his shoulder.

“You’ve got a pretty pussy.” he said nonchalantly, placing a kiss on where the slit started.

You laughed a little, pulling his head back to look up at you. He let you do it. “And you’ve got a pretty face to look at while you eat my pretty pussy.”

He let out a small exhale of a laugh, and you felt his breath brush up against your clit. Your grip on his head shivered, and it didn’t go unnoticed.

Soon enough, he was licking and kissing your soft spot. He took his time, remaining very gentle and attentive. No tremble, no shake, no quiver went unnoticed while he worked.

As you started to get closer to orgasm, you pulled him by his hair, tilting his head up at you. His eyes were half-lidded, staring up at you, his lapping at your folds unwavering.

You rubbed yourself a little more forcibly into him, grinding against his face. He seemed to like it, as he placed a hand on your hip, bringing you down even harder onto him every time you pushed up against him.

You felt yourself getting close, and the moans you had been stifling were getting hard to hold in. “Fucking god, Carlos, I’m close.” you murmured.

Carlos didn’t respond, nor speed up, he simply shut his eyes and kept the pace he had been going at. You stared down at his eyelashes, admiring how long they were as you came.

Your body shook a little, and once the high was over, you were panting, relying on Carlos to hold you up. He slowly pulled away, placing your leg back down, running his hands up your body as he stood up with you.

He held you for a moment, placing your head against his chest, and rubbing your back as you calmed down.

Once your breathing was steady, you pulled away from him, grabbing him by the shirt. His eyes widened, and he gave you an amused look.

You clung to him for a moment, before running your hands down his body as you got onto your knees in front of him.

Panicked, he took your hands off him and held them gently. “Hey, hey– you don’t have to–”

You looked up at him, still panting a little. “I’m paying you back.”

He shook his head, and then let go of one of your hands to caress your face. “Nah. Not this time. You can pay me back another time. After all, if I let you pay me back now, you might just run away and I won’t get to see you again.”

He smiled down at you as he said it, and you blushed a little when you realized he said not this time. That meant that there would be other times.

He then helped you up to your feet and kissed you again. It was a gentle kiss, but after your last orgasm, you were feeling needy for something faster.

You took the lead from him, kissing him as aggressively as you could to show that you were ready for him to be a little more rough with you. He seemed to get the hint but pulled away from the kiss.

“I don’t have a condom,” he said, seeming a little downcast at the thought.

You smiled at him, your arms now around his neck. “I do.”

He perked up a little and smirked at you. “You’re a little too prepared for a damsel-in-distress, aren’t you?”

You laughed and replied as you went to get the condom from your purse. “I’d say I’m just the right amount of prepared.”

As you walked back over to him with the condom, he pulled you in and started kissing your neck once more. He moved from up, down, up, down, then up again before whispering in your ear. “Think you’re prepared enough to put it on me?”

You laughed at his smooth words, and you whispered back. “What, you don’t know how to put one on yourself?”

He chuckled, and pulled away, taking the condom as you handed it to him. He tore it open using his teeth, staring down at you as he did it. Once it was open, you made a smart remark. “You know you’re not supposed to use your teeth to get it out, right?”

He chuckled, placing the wrapper and condom in his palm. He made a closed fist and went to remove his clothes. You admired his body as he did – and in regards to your earlier comment about him being a hairy man, you were right. He had just the right amount of chest hair, as well as a happy trail stemming from his trimmed pubic area. “Guess you were right – I don’t know how to put one on, after all.”

You laughed, watching him slide the thin condom onto his shaft. He was pretty big – you were a little worried about being able to fit all of him in.

Once he was certain the condom was on well, he looked over at you before picking you up in a rush. You giggled, wrapping your legs around his hips and burying your head in his neck. After a couple of seconds, you felt the cold wall against your back, and arched into him a little, trying to escape from the freezing touch.

He made a hmm noise that sounded amused at your squirming and then began pecking little kisses on your neck. You slowly eased back against the wall, getting used to the cold.

Once you did, Carlos began to press his body into you. You could tell Carlos enjoyed getting as much skin-on-skin as he could when intimate because he was always somehow buried in your touch.

His hips ground his cock into your stomach, humping you slowly as he continued to suck your neck. You were starting to get a little impatient now, wanting him inside you already, and so the next time he ground into you, you ground back.

He didn’t seem to be expecting it, as he let out a throaty, closed-mouth moan. He got the hint, though, as he pulled back a little, and propped himself at your entrance.

Slowly, he lowered you down onto his cock. He inserted the head first, watching your expression to see if it was okay. You winced a little, and he noticed.

Whispering, he tried to encourage you while he eased into you. “You’re doing good, Y/N. Most damsels-in-distress would’ve given up by now.”

You laughed, feeling him sink into you more. He smiled, watching your face as you adjusted. “Want me to make some noise for you?” he said, lowering his voice.

You nodded your head, interested in what noises he was going to make.

He placed his head on your shoulder, beginning to make subtle grunts and moans the more his cock delved into you.

You started to get a little more wet from hearing his voice, turned on by the presumable pleasure he was feeling as he moved in deeper and deeper. Eventually, he was fully in, and you were more than ready to get started.

You tapped his shoulder, insinuating that you were good to go. He picked his head up from your collarbone, then pressed his forehead against yours as he began to pull out, then push back in.

Both of you gasped silently, gripping one another as a way to express how good it felt. He continued to move, alternating the way he did it, going from rolling his hips in a continuous rhythm to jerkily bucking into you. Carlos was proving to be a spontaneous lover, and you had to admit, you enjoyed being kept on your toes.

Eventually, things started to pick up, and Carlos was now thrusting into you with a feverish desire. You moaned into his mouth as he kissed you, hearing his heavy breathing every time he pulled away for air. You knew it wouldn’t be much longer until he came, and so you decided that you would start making your way to orgasm as well.

One of your arms reached down to your clit, and you began to rub yourself while Carlos buried himself in you. He pulled away from the kiss with a pop, which actually wasn’t as audible, since it was drowned out by the sound of both of your breathing, moaning, and collision of skin.

He buried his head into your neck, a slur of whines, grunts, and moans escaping his lips.

You listened to his voice, closing your eyes, and focusing on reaching your climax. It didn’t take long after he caught on that you were right there, and whispered in your ear, “Do it. Cum on me. Cum on my cock.”

As you came down from your high, you trembled in Carlos’ arms. You noticed he was starting to become shaky himself, and you were a little worried as you felt his hands wobble underneath your bottom. It was likely that his arms were getting tired from holding you up for a prolonged amount of time.

You pulled his head in close, whispering in his ear. As you did, you heard his breath hitch, panting as if he were desperate for air. “Carlos,” you said, “Let me help you cum. What do you need?”

He opened his mouth to speak, but only a moan came out at first. “My back…scratch up my back.”

You listened to what he asked, digging your nails into his skin, softly at first, and then a little more rough once you felt him shiver. He seemed to like it a lot.

He continued, which surprised you a little. You thought he would’ve stopped at his one request, but he didn’t. He must’ve been a needy man. “Kiss my neck,” he huffed, “please, Y/N.”

You followed what he asked, kissing on his neck as you clawed up the muscles on his back. It didn’t take much longer after that, and soon enough his entire body was trembling. He thrust a couple more times into you, grunting as he did, and you felt his cock jerk as he spilled his warm seed into the condom.

As soon as he came, his hands lost most of their grip on holding you, and you unwrapped your legs around his waist, jumping down. You felt him press into you, heaving as if he weren’t getting any air. You smiled and decided to comfort him as he did for you earlier after eating you out.

Pulling him into an embrace, you felt his head rest against the wall, trying to reach your shoulder, but failing as he was too tall. You chuckled and began to rub his back, talking to him in an endearing tone. “You good, Carlos?”

“Yeah–yeah, I’m good.” he huffed, and soon after his response, he pulled back, standing straight as he looked down at you.

“So, was it good? For you, I mean.” He said, running a hand through his hair.

You laughed, reaching up to caress his cheek. He leaned into your touch. “It was really good. The best I’ve ever had, I’d say.”

He smiled, taking your hand from his cheek and kissing it, “It was good for me, too. Turns out I really like saving damsels-in-distress. Who knew, huh?”

You rolled your eyes at his comment. The two of you then continued your back-and-forth witty remarks, while agreeing on going to wash yourselves off quickly in the showers that were a part of the locker room you just had sex in. As you both bathed in separate stalls, you continued to talk, practically yelling over the bustling of the shower head as the water fell.You hoped no one was nearby outside, because it was likely they would have heard you.

Once finished, the two of you got dressed and grabbed your stuff. Luckily enough, the locker room that you went into was the men’s, so Carlos was able to grab his things from the locker he usually uses when on lifeguard duty.

The two of you then walked out of the building together, acting like a newlywed couple. You teased one another, laughing and joking around as you had the entire night.

Once outside, feeling the chill on your skin, you both paused, not sure where to go from there. You both didn’t really want to go your separate ways.

You desperately wanted to ask for his number, but you weren’t sure how to do so in a witty and playful way. You didn’t want to ask outright, because for some reason, even after all you just did, you worried it would come off as desperate. Even though you were desperate.

You opened your mouth to speak but was cut off by Carlos. “Hey, so, if it’s alright with you–you wouldn’t mind me asking for your number, would you?”

You giggled, happy that he was thinking of the same thing. “No, I wouldn’t mind at all. I was just thinking of asking the same thing.”

Carlos smiled, and the two of you quickly exchanged numbers. “Make sure to give me a cutesy name and contact photo.” He said playfully grinning at you.

And that gave you an idea. “Hey, why don’t we take a picture right now? That way we both get to have a cute contact photo.”

He smiled, ruffling your hair, and then let you hold your phone up, ready to take the picture.

“Cheese!” you exclaimed, and he laughed as you pressed the camera button.

After taking the photo, you sent it to him straight away. The two of you then realized it was getting late, and you couldn’t drag your time on with one another any longer. You said your goodbyes, and both went in different directions to get into your cars.

As soon as you got into your car, you started it and began to think about your night. Your cheeks blushed, and you immediately grabbed your phone. You had to tell your friends what happened.

Unsurprisingly, they all freaked out on you, exclaiming how they were wondering where you went. You laughed a little, typing out a quick summary. After hitting send, one of your friends began to ask strange questions.

“Jill: Wait, what does he look like?”

Puzzled, you typed out a relatively simple description. After a couple of minutes, your friend responded.

“Jill: Wtf I think I know him”

“Jill: He’s in my science class???”

“Jill: Dude sucks at science lmao”

You were a little taken aback by the revelation of Jill knowing Carlos, although you were a little more shocked at him sucking at science. He seemed like a science-y kinda guy.

As you continued to chat with your friends, you got a notification from Carlos. Your heartbeat quickened, and you wondered what he had to say so soon.

Upon opening the notification, you saw that what he had sent was a screenshot of your contact name and profile picture in his phone – it was the selfie the two of you took, along with the name “Damsel.”

You reply with your own screenshot, which also used the selfie the two of you took, while his name was set to “Phelps.” It didn’t take long for him to reply,

“Phelps: Hey, hasn’t anyone ever told you it’s rude to call a gentleman Phelps?”

You laughed out loud, and could already tell you’d be spending the rest of your night talking with Carlos.

Oh well. The night was still young.

For the official and original Kinktober 23 prompts, check here. Credits to @kinktober2023 for the ideas!

#carlos oliveira #carlos resident evil #carlos oliveira smut #carlos oliveira fluff #resident evil smut #resident evil fluff #resident evil #resident evil oneshot #kinktober 23 #kinktober #carlos oliveira x you #carlos oliveira x reader #instalove #pool boy #re3 remake #size difference #re fanfic #resident evil fanfiction #smut

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eschergirls · 6 months

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It's been 2 weeks so it's time to announce the winners of the November caption contest featuring Avengelyne... captured...?

Each winner will get to choose a prize if they wish (but you don't have to, you can just participate for fun, I just wanted to give a prize because I enjoy the caption contests and entries).

Like last time, I've decided to organize the entries by the way they were submitted, just to make it easier.

Here are the caption entries, I got so many this time and they were all so good it was hard for me to choose winners:

From Mastodon:

Claire: "she looks like she is kind of surprised there was a lady on the other end of that chain" Dollcomics: “Sweep the floors, clean the bathroom, polish the chains AND a $500 cleaning fee? Ugh, AirBNBs are the worst” Socketwench: "Look, I really think you need an MRI, a physical therapist, or a chiropractor." "Just pull, okay? My back hasn't cracked in a f-ing week."

From Disqus and Email:

Imry: "It's company policy that all captured heroes need to be sexily chained up. It's ineffective, time-consuming, expensive, and the the minions hate it more than the heroes... but nobody can complain because they aren't part of a union and don't have collective bargaining powers. Do you want your work uniform to give you a permanent wedgie? No? Then join a union!" Karmazyna: "How many times do I have to tell you: whatever you find in the Home Depot's clearance section is NOT clothing material!" Leak: "Give me a moment, and we'll have you elongated to Liefeld Standard(TM) in no time..." Mel: "Would you stop tugging? The lock isn't on yet! You're so impatient; I'm never doing a kinky photoshoot with you again." P J Evans: "A private party? You didn't say it was a private party!"

From Tumblr:

@angrybidoof: "When you book a chiropractor off Craigslist" @anna-neko: "and I will keep pulling, until your dumb face finally makes an expression" @atomicmosaic: "she seems miffed: "that all you got? I'm like a centimeter off the floor"" @captainacerbic: "are you positive that this method will make me taller and thinner? If so, don't stop even if I cry" "Got it gurl" @captainlordauditor: "With no access to a BDSM dungeon, the castle's armory proved an acceptable substitute for an impromptu demonstration in the purpose of the time travelers' costumes. " @cenobitic-anchorite: "When I told you we were out of toilet paper, this was NOT the solution I had in mind!" @cirquedereve: "Guess I'm really locked in to this relationship." @differenttriumphdragon: "What do you MEAN your shackles already broke!? How are we supposed to fix it when you used all the electrical tape on your costume!?" @foreversoaring: "According to her, the hottest way to decorate a bdsm dungeon was to give it a ‘museum weapons collection’ theme." @haveievermentioned: "Oh my gosh, why didn't you tell me this was your first time in a BDSM dungeon?" @inukagome15: "You've been a bad girl. Time for some avenging." @megpie71: "Look, I hate it as much as you do, but it's the only way we have to straighten out a rubber spine." @of-another-broken-heart: "Are you SURE this isn't a porn shoot?" "We need the rent money, so does it really matter?" @siklo: "-Harder! Do you want a tip or not!?" "-I don't know anymore. I think I might quit..." @sylvanas-girlkisser: "Me and my girlfriend had thought of very different things when planning our "dungeon date" but we made it work. #the katana was maybe a bit much though" @thevikingfish-nimhrodell: "This is what you get for using up all the duct tape in the house for your costume!! I don't care that it's waterproof!" @vabolo: "You know, I'm starting to think this isn't what that Sia song meant" @whitetyger123: "Stop! Why are you doing this to me?" "I don't know really. Having a wedgie as bad as mine makes people do all sorts of crazy things." @winterrssoldier: "Unconventional chiropractor helps women with scoliosis" @woodsworth: "Gurl let me get a least that posture straight for you" @youlookterrible: "this is this is showgirls innit that's elizabeth berkeley and that's the gersh" @zombiemollusk: "yeah, sorry, i forgot the safeword and this costume is waaaay too itchy." "BUT DID YOU HAVE TO BREAK THE SHACKLES??"

Because I got so many good submissions, I'm going to pick 2 honorable mentions again and then the 3 winners!

So Honorable Mentions go to: Imry and @thevikingfish-nimhrodell!

If you're an honorable mention and want a prize and somebody in the top 3 passes it, up then I'll contact you. :)

And here are the winners:

3rd place goes to Dollcomics

2nd place goes to @angrybidoof

And finally the winner is... @cirquedereve!

If you won and would like a prize, please message me with which prize you would like. If you came in 2nd, message me with 2 choices in order of preference, and if you came in 3rd, message me with 3 choices, etc... I'll give you your top choice that hadn't been taken by the other winners.

The codes I have available are for: Overgrowth, Syberia, Riot: Civil Unrest, Castle Crashers, Hotel Giant 2, Not The Robots, Steel Storm: Burning Retribution, Rage in Peace, Uncertain: The Last Quiet Day, Uncertain: Light At The End, Shattered - Tale of the Forgotten King, Morbid: The Seven Acolytes, The Swindle, Zengeon, Wayward Souls, and Nigate Tale.

Please stay tuned for another caption contest coming in December, it's going to be a special holiday themed one!

#avengelyne #caption contest #caption contest winners

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kowalskiology101 · 2 months

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My MoFy ranking of 6 main adult characters' parents seen and unseen from loved to despised by me

I come and go from this site as I please. These are my personal opinions. The parents of the 6 main adults who were adults from the beginning.

1.Frank Dunphy- Always supportive and comes to things like seeing his granddaugther's boyfriend's band play in an under 21 club with his daughter in law's brother's gay partner. Always wants Phil to follow his own path and dream big. The biggest dreamer in the show.

2. Grace Dunphy- I feel like how she impacted the characters really says a lot about her. And she wanted someone to take care of Frank after she died even if that relationship didn't work out. And she's one of the few adult family members who seemed to understand and relate to Alex.

3. Jay Pritchett- Mostly high up based on his ability to change through the series. Later seasons didn't do season 5 finale Jay justice as much as it should. He still had issues with Joe's toenails being painted or Manny not being 'manly'. But he and Mitch did come to the middle a bit and I love his overall character arc.

4. Pilar Ramirez- Mainly because the next two are unseen and the rest aren't great. She's very protective of her daughter and she does care about family.

5. Fulgencio Ramirez- honestly we don't know much but from how Gloria describes him, he sounds pretty decent. He could be tied or switched with Jay's mom simply because we don't have enough info.

6. Jay's mom- She seems a bit stern as she didn't like Mitch cutting his spaghetti (depending on how old a kid is, I'd cut spaghetti so they don't choke) but definitely stuck up for Jay when he was being berated by a coach when he was a kid.

7. Merle Tucker- He did have an affair in 1977 but that was pre series and resolved off screen. He may have made a cake topper and visited willingly and given presents, he really was still uncomfortable up to the date of the wedding. We only saw him 3 episodes (2 if you count the wedding as one big episode) He couldn't even tell the two dudes that the 'father of the bride' doesn't exist because sons are gay. Granted, Jay didn't either, but Merle seems like a pretty uninvolved parent. Uninvolved to the point of letting Barb do what she wants and not paying attention to how his kids are being raised. We don't know much about Cam's other siblings, but Pam and Cam are a result of bad parenting (I know script says they do this and that and I know it's a sitcom and not that deep, but I'm a writer and this is my current fandom obsession. So it is that deep for the stories)

8. Dede Pritchett- I'll just echo something Mitch said in the crazy train episode and should've remembered "She's a scheming dragon woman hell-bent on destroying everyone around her" (I actually disliked Mitchell the most in Good Grief for dismissing how horrible Dede was to Claire)

9. Jay's dad- While Dede was a living presence, she really impacted one generation. Jay's dad impacted two. His son and grandson by emotional neglect. He's not mentioned that many times but when he is mentioned around Mitch, the redhead is silent (could just be script choice and me reading too much into it-shush, my opinion). Claire does mention him going on a racist rant about Pearl Harbor bc he saw sushi in a store in the seventies. I admit some fanon interpretations have impacted me, but I don't feel like it's a long shot to assume he was in some form mentally/emotionally abusive. There is a mentioned incident of Mitch not being able to stand salt and vinegar chips due to childhood trauma when he was seven and Cam knows since he was more concerned about Lily underperforming in a talent show at that moment and said 'can't relive this with you right now'. It could be a bully who made him eat the chips, I personally headcanon it being Mitch's grandfather forcing him after he tried one and spit it in the trash.

10. Barb Tucker- What could be worse than narcissistic, scheming dragon lady mother or man who spurred generational (at least emotional) trauma? My issues with Barb were initially just her continuous sexual assault of Mitchell (damn writers for just being ok with this) and being cheated on in the past doesn't absolve her of future crimes. What she did to Mitchell was bad enough, but I've been thinking of her impact on Cam and how not only did she baby him and treat him like the golden child, but years after Cam and Mitch were married, Barb seemingly 'still blames herself to this day' for Cam being gay because she once washed his mouth out with soap in the shape of (leaning tower of Pisa or Eiffel tower). So that got me thinking is she trying to scare Mitch away and somehow turn her son straight? Barb will always be the character I dislike most on this show. More than Pam because it's at least partially her fault Pam and Cam are so 'high and mighty' . Yes, even more than Gil Thorpe.

#modern family #cameron tucker #mitchell pritchett #jay pritchett #gloria pritchett #claire dunphy #phil dunphy #pls take with grain of salt or mountain of salt #reviews

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dangelqueentmnt16 · 9 months

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Hat box ghost x autistic reader 💕

Based a real story from my dear friend with autism!

My name is Y/N I'm 18 and I live in Louisiana, in an old mansion. I'm walking home after school, you see people are ignorant asshols! I was in class today talking to my bff. We were walking down the hall to lunch.I was talking about my favorite game plants vs zombies! The lore is actually very coated and detailed! But suddenly my stupid classmates intruded in our conversation! "Hey Y/N, how's it going!?" They taunted me, my bff scrunched her nose in annoyance. "Go away, I'm not dealing with your shit today Claire!" I snapped at her. But little did I notice the air horn Maggie had in her hand, suddenly she blaired it in my right ear! Scarring me shitless, my bff saw me collapse and cover my ears on the floor. She snarled at the tow twits, and began yelling at them, but all I could hear was ringing… my hands and body felt shaky…. My voice began to stutter in mumbles and sounds without illegible words. My bff saw this and knew that moving me would only over stimulate me more! But she sat with me for the whole hour, even though the teacher eventually made us go back to class…

You see, I have autism, and I'm very known for being overstimulated easily in school. Due to the one year I had an attack during a fire drill! You see, sudden loud noises tend to make me over-stimulate… and my classmates think I'm faking it or I'm just crazy! The only real friend I have is my bff, who has OCD! To say the least, the rest of the day was hell! I was fumbling over myself, and put myself into my drawing trying to keep calm. It didn't really help much, but my teachers were understanding. but mostly I just wanted to go home!

I'm now on my way home walking down the dirt road, the air is crisp and cool. Autumn is in motion and the air feels free with lively energy! As I walk down the lane to the front of the house, i noticed my parents cars weren't in the driveway. Mom must be at work, and dad is probably getting groceries. I walk up the steps to meet the door, inserting the key and turning it with a click. I push the door open with a eary creek, and close it behind me trapping the cool air outside! "HELLO, IM HOOOOME!!!" I yell out to the house my voice, bouncing off the walls. There was no answer, so I sighed and turned to the kitchen tossing my coat off on the kitchen table. I go for the cabinet, and grab the hot coco mix. I then put some water in the electric kettle, and set it to warm up "tisk tissue tissue, young lady put your jacket away!" I smile softly, but not much. I didn't feel great today… I turn to the direction of the voice, "hi hatty!" Before my eyes he materialized. There stood my favorite ghost with a goofy grin and hatbox in hand. He looked up at me with a smile, but it fell quickly " my dear, why do your eyes seem so sad?" I sighed a beep echoed in the room, I grabbed a mug from the cupboard and poured the warm water in the mug. Mixing in the hot cocoa packet, I took my first sip and let the flavor take me away from my sorrows… "Y/N?" Hatty asked again and I sighed, placing my cup down on the counter. "Claire and Maggie blew a blow horn in my ear and I got over-stimulated at lunch time.." I silently confessed. His eyes widened, and his face grew with some anger. "Oh dear, I'm so sorry Y/N!" He came over to you scooping you in a cold embrace, you let the tears fall and cried into his chest. He held you like the moment he let go you'd disappear, little did I know he was plotting a great revenge! CLAIRE AND NAGGIE WILL PAY!!" The rest of the night you two spent your time in your room on your bed, cuddling watching markiplier get scared shitless from fnaf jump scares!

Part 2 eventually. I'm very busy with packing "my boyfriend & his fam r moving", and studying the G.E.D. so srry but I promise part 2 will come soon luv yall 🤗💕

#haunted mansion #hatbox ghost #hatbox ghost x reader #alistair crump #the haunted mansion #the hatbox ghost #disney #disney haunted mansion #fanfiction #fanfic

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ethanhuntfemmefatale · 10 months

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I feel like you’re the only other person in the world who is as intrigued by the ethan/claire/jim dynamic as I am. It drives me crazy! I love that ethan, who is portrayed as a pretty flawless guy (he just cares TOO much) in the later movies gets this like crazy quirk of being in love with his father figure/boss’s wife and I love that you’re not always sure how much is manipulation and how much is genuine every time they interact. Severely underrated. Anyway loved the fic!

anon i am so so glad that you loved the fic and i am so glad to hear from another person fascinated by the ethan/claire/jim fuckery. (incidentally being a fellow ethan/claire/jim interested individual entitles you automatically to friend status should you so desire)

your ask touches on some things and it's giving me the urge to rant so please forgive me cause im probably about to get very off topic. I just love your point about the way that ethan (who is so steadfastly heroic in later movies!) starts out with this massive, like, to lean into the MI1 religious imagery, sin. And that sin isn't resolved in any satisfactory way--both of the people involved die, and no one is left alive who even knows what really happened, and this makes me feel rabid to think about. (Luther saw the cheek kiss, but has no context for it, and I feel strongly that Ethan has never told him anything else about that. I really think Ethan never breathes a word to anyone about Jim, Claire or Max. Kittridge is probably the closest to being able to infer some of the details, he knows Ethan loved Jim, he knows about Max's "entrapment," but he's too much of a self-absorbed bureaucrat to give a shit.)

But back to the point about the sin. For my money, Ethan's sin is the heart of MI1. The movie tells us that Ethan's sin is being in love with Claire--but in a queer reading of the movie, it's easy to read into Ethan's interactions with Claire and Jim and infer that his real sin is being in love with both of them, a sin that Jim will never openly acknowledge, but that all three of them are aware of to some degree. Ethan's sin is also portrayed as being...not actually his fault. He doesn't participate in any of Claire's "seduction moments," although from his expression after the cheek kiss IMO you can see that he has strong feelings about them. Ethan's sin is something that is done to him, and regardless of whether or not he wants it, regardless of whether initiates or even participates, he is corrupted by the experience. He's only (to some degree) cleansed by the death of claire, jim and krieger, the only people who knew about what happened.

(one of the reasons I drew from gawain and the green knight in the end of the fic is because--beyond the parallels of jim as the lord going hunting in the woods, claire as the lady going hunting for gawain, ethan as the knight just trying to make it out alive--that's a story that deals heavily in impossible moral tests and loss of agency. And Gawain emerges from it 'fey-touched', fundamentally changed despite the fact that most of what happened to him was unwanted and unavoidable. That's how i feel about ethan at the end of MI1)

It's important to note briefly that I actually don't think of the Claire/Jim/Ethan thing as his only sin in the movie. It's the only one that's remarked on directly, but the whole thing with Max feels like it's presented too similarly to ignore. It's another situation of power differences and emotional and sexual manipulation where Ethan is put in an impossible position and emerges morally corrupted (by the rules of the movie), but victorious.

In a lot of ways, I feel like the sin itself almost serves less as an indictment of Ethan and more as a worldbuilding device. MI1 establishes the world of the IMF really vividly without showing us hardly anything about it! we don't even know what the IMF is really, it doesn't have a headquarters, we don't get to know any other teams outside of the one that dies in the beginning, but the movie renders the world of the IMF through Ethan's relationship with Claire and Jim. I've talked before about the "sea of lies." The thing that made me love MI1 so much in the first place was the specific feeling that is so beautifully evoked, of gradually realizing that everyone you have ever loved wants to use you. That's the IMF! That's spywork, baby! Ethan doesn't realize it in the beginning, but he sure figures it out by the end. it's impossible for ethan to make it out of MI1 without becoming part of the corrupt world of the IMF, the real IMF that Claire and Jim and Kittridge are in, not the fantasy of the team in the opening. (to go back to the green knight metaphor--he has to take the sash in order to live--and even though that means compromising his morals, he's blameless. Corrupt, forever, but blameless.)

despite that--ethan is not the IMF. He believes in Claire. He believes in Luther. He avoids killing. he has an honor code that he sticks to even as he gets deeper and deeper into the sea of lies. that's what makes him the guy we see in the rest of the franchise, that at arguably his most vulnerable point, his most corrupt point, he believed in the people he loved and tried not to hurt anyone. The point of the sin, to me, is that Ethan is forced into the deep end of the murkiest grey moral waters and held underneath, and in the process he sacrifices moral purity for moral integrity and makes it out alive. and the movie doesn't hate him for it. He's a hero.

lots of thoughts for this ask lmfao thank you very much anon for indulging me. and thank you for reading the fic. i am so glad you liked it!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#mission impossible #long post #mission impossible 1 #claire phelps #jim phelps #ethan hunt #max mitsopolis #jim phelps evil polycule

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swanqueen1215 · 6 months

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Beetlebabes fanfiction writers, I need your help!!

Doesn't it happen that they have a wonderful idea for a fanfiction but your ass with ADHD prevents them from doing so??

Well, that's what happens to me... I need support to finish them and to complement ideas.

I'm very familiar with fanfictions in English and Spanish, and I wish I could write as well as you do... My own mind can't stay so focused on itself, I need at least someone who can and wants to help me.

Here I'll put the basic ideas for some of my fanfics.

Lawrence's Corpse

Beetlejuice X Lydia as Emily and Victor from the Corpse Bride.

But here the story will be modified a little, occupying the past that they showed us in the musical.

I want to include gay attraction, murder, guilt, suicide attempts, and depression.

A quick recap: Lydia is the daughter of a major funeral home owner. (Delia and Emily are not alive here) And the Maitlands are the legal guardians of a nephew, Vincent, who wants to marry him to Lydia to regain his prestige, but they're not the bad guys here. Lydia wants to be in control of her destiny and hates it when her father takes her away from him...

Beetlejuice was the son of Juno, a wealthy Countess. Juno murdered her own son because she's a homophobic bitch...

Lydia and Beetlejuice make a deal, she marries him, he will revive and he will use his influences to take her away from her father...

Not knowing that they would fall in love with each other.

I Was Meant To Be Yours

The scene where Beetlejuice proposes to Lydia and she runs to her room in fear. As Beetlejuice tries to get her out of the room by force, he sings JD's song, "I Was Meant To Be Yours" with the lyrics modified.

Driver's Seat

Beetlejuice wasn't kidding when he said, "When I finally say I do, I'll be alive and born anew and I'll be boring just like you."

His demonic essence is expelled from his body as soon as the marriage to Lydia becomes real. Now he's an ordinary human who doesn't remember Lydia or the feelings that made him want to be alive in the first place. But again he will have to be a demon to protect Lydia from her mother, who now wants to kill them all. Now Lawrence will have to get along with the voice in his mind that calls itself Beetlejuice.

The Prophecy

When Beetlejuice was younger and just beginning to guide souls to the other side, one day he met a seer witch, who warned him that a person would release him from his prison, both literally and metaphorically. Beetlejuice thought the lady was crazy, but she warned him that she would hurt him a lot more than he could think. The young man ended up looking for "that person" for centuries without really understanding what the witch was referring to.

And he understood it when he felt the dagger break every fiber of his muscles and bones.

But the emotional pain she caused him was far worse than the physical pain...

Golden Heart

Lydia discovers Beetlejuice coming out of her house hiding a large bouquet of flowers while it is well combed and cleaned. Lydia immediately thinks he has found someone and is frightened by the idea that he is going to abandon her. She searches her room for any photos or things that affirm her suspicions, until she finds a gold pendant that confirms what she already feared.

Beetlejuice finds her a little mess of tears that she wants to hide, and he takes her to meet the woman who gave him that. And Lydia is surprised to see that this woman died 400 years ago, of course according to the tombstone on which her remains rest.

Latin Class

Lydia gets a punishment at school because of Claire Brewster/ Or maybe she's just having trouble with her Latin class homework.

And Beetlejuice is very disappointed when Lydia ignores him all day because of the difficulties she is having with the language, but Beetlejuice is there to help her finish her homework. Lydia learns that, Beetlejuice is a kind of polyglot corpse.

The Demon Of The House

It's an adapted story about the Phantom of the Opera

Beetlejuice loses a bet with Lydia and she makes him pay by making him dress up as a cheesy character from one of his gothic romance novels...

The funny thing is... He doesn't dislike it at all

Lydia has to leave the house to run some errands.

Something that bores Beetlejuice, who stayed at home to wait for her return...

He was so bored that he thought it would be a good idea to read that stupid book while she was coming back. It turns out that Beetlejuice actually likes the book and identifies with Erik, and thinks of Lydia as Christine...

But after some thought, Beetlejuice freaks out at the thought that his friendship with Lydia might be driven primarily by fear, and he doesn't want to have Lydia around him just because of that.

His insecurities lead to their nightmare taking reality itself hostage...

While little by little he is consumed, by his fear, little by little he distorts reality until he recreates every page of the book.

What they don't know, is that it's not all Beetlejuice's fault, but that they have lodged a small worm in the neck of the deceased, which literally ate away at his mind and slowly took over his host and the longer he uses his powers to a great extent, the faster they can be consumed.

That's it!

Also most of my fanfictions are "what if" and contain a lot of emotional damage...

I'd also like to say that if you have just one idea, I'll be happy to hear from you too.

Those are at least a couple of proposals, if you want to help me write them, I will gladly be eternally grateful for your support... And thank you for taking the time to read me.

See you then and thank you!

I'll wait for your message! 💕💖

#beetlelyds #beetlejuice animated #beetlejuice #beetlebabes #musicalbabes

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bemycoffeepot · 2 months

Note

oh bestie please share some books on your tbr! (as if my tbr needed more books lmao) and ofc the one you're currently reading!

OH MY GOSH I'M REALLY ABOUT TO DO THIS

as long as it just stays between us (and well Tumblr) ;)

But honestly SECRET, sending love to wherever you are because this is one of my favorite subjects <3 hihihihihi

some favs of mine, that I've already read:

Morning Glory by Lavyrle Spencer: cried literally from just how healthy and beautiful their whole relationship was. Western/WW2. Beautiful writing. Flawed characters. This book was a 12/10 at least. BUT NOT KU UNFORTUNATELY :(

Against A Wall by Cate C Wells THIS BOOK HERE IS NARUTO FROM AGAIN. HE IS MY INSPIRATION, MY MUSE, MY EVERYTHING. MY HIMBO!! Love Cash more than life itself. AND IT'S KU ;)

Win Some, Lose Some : MMC on the spectrum, high-school setting, 18, such a healthy lovely relationship. Loved her and loved him. Only MMC's perspective.

Real Players Never Lose by Micaela Smeltzer. He's sweet and hot and a college jock but intelligent and loves his plus-size baddie to bits.

Beast in Shining Armor by Cassandra Gannon. I just loved them. He was beautiful, mean, but so, so in love with her. Enemies-to-Lovers but make it i-loved-you-since-we-were-just-kids. Fantasy, crazy writing, awesome setting.

Bass-Ackwards by Eris Adderly. I won't say anything just age-gap and not ethical. But awesome. Read at you orn risk heheheh

Nine Minutes by Beth Flynn. This is a trilogy and has no business being this good. THE PLOT WAS HEAVY WILD CRAZY AND A WHOLE FUCKING LOT. But it all made sense!!!!!!! Warning though: it's underage.

Dear Grumpy Boss by Julia Wolf. This is sweet with some light angst. Plus-size baddie and hot, rich brother's best friend.

Honestly everything by Claire Kent. Short novellas, lots and lots of smut but holy goodness. 3rd POV. Personally, love her writing, not everyone does though.

Last Light by Claire Kent Embers by Claire Kent (age-gap but make it my-dead-boyfriend's-dad-old. He's literally her dead boyfriend's dad HAHAHA. Post-apocalypse. Just surviving. He's hot in his very own way but oh well, Kent's writing is special in its really weird way. It's kind of a hit or miss hihihi)

Haven by Claire Kent (he's hooooooot and responsible?! i'm always in for that ;)) Hold by Claire Kent (just love it. it's in a kind of sci-fi setting but honestly, Kent's writing is solely focused on the relationship it doesn't really feel like sci-fi) Fall by Claire Kent (this here ladies and gentlemen... DON'T SHOOT ME, HE'S A CAVEMAN. A REAL FUCKING CAVEMAN. I think I need to see a psychiatrist because holy macaroni, this story shouldn't have made me feel so many things. And well, keep in mind he's a caveman in a prehistoric setting... She's not... The dynamic is special)

A Soul To Keep: fantasy and well he's absolutely not human. SIX FREAKING PAGES TO DESCRIBE HIS DICK!!!!! but so so sweet. He just wants to be loved and love.

Consider Me by Becka Mack: adorable read

Not KU unfortunately but awesome, awesome books:

Eyes of SIlver, Eyes of Gold. Beautiful, healthy relationship. Plot is 12/10. I loved him and her just so much. They work together and we see there relationship develop in a way that's incredible. I would literally give anything to re-read this book for the very first time.

Lord of Scoundrels : beauty and the beast, regency. loved it. Not on KU :( but it's worth buying honestly...

Happiness for Beginners by Katherine Center

GURLLL, i've got so many more!!!!! I'm gonna stop myself now because maybe you'll see this and will only think wtf is this girl reading....

BUT NOW YOU HAVE TO INTRODUCE ME TO YOUR WORLD OF the BRIDGERTONS!!!!!! I NEED SOME RECOMMENDATIONS!!!!!!!!!! <3 <3

Me, after posting this:

I'm gonna hide now.

<3 <3 <3

#ku

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fantomette22 · 2 days

Note

bloodborne asks : 1, 11, 19 (besides Gehrman), 30, 50 !!

Ask game from here.

Favorite boss fight

Hm good question as well XD (I'm bad at choice I love many bosses!) But my favorite is of course Lady Maria. As in the boss fight. I need to redo her for sure but I always very enjoy the most fight. It's like a dance I love it! it's hard but not too hard as well. It's impressive, frightening and beautiful all at once.

11. If stats weren't a thing, what would you wear?

Well except when I need to go in the poison swamp or fight the winter lanterns, fight a very strong boss or try a new outfit just for the drip or references I do stay all the time with the same clothes.

That mean this : +the hat

very gender I know I love it. Wish it was real I would buy it x)

19. Favorite Old Hunter?

Besides Gehrman? Well Lady Maria obliviously duh.

😂 Ok i am joking let's not count her either. And let's not take Ludwig into account too. Well this 3 gone I would say hm Archibald and Izzy perhaps? Gratia as well. (80% of the shit I made about them are basically headcanons but it's not like 98% of the stuff I made up for Paarl jfeznfbf) + I really like Valtr, Henryk & co of course! (a bit everyone lol). But if we count like the nightmare hunters from that era my fav is literally an OC who became the beast possess soul 😭

30. Is there anything you always do in your playthroughs, even if it's not necessary to beat the game?

Hm get at least 3 Umbilical cord at least XD. and do all the bosses + try to have all the set & weapons! (items, runes etc Well the expensive weapons & outfits not all the time for sure.)

50. Tell me about your hunters!

Well I have Lucen Venator of course! (hunter on the pic above!) And I made a 2nd one for a new playthrough, I think I named her Claire bc I didn't want just a feminized version of Lucen's name lol but she's an equivalent of him for sure. One day I would need to make a third hunters for sure.

I made a couple of posts about Lucen & art + my friends did amazing drawings of him 🥺 (from Katy, Chess, Crow & Odds)

(He looks way too much like me smt help. I need to change my icon to the small chibi one day)

SO hm what can I say... ah yeah let's go with the oblivious for me :

In my main headcanon (fic verse) He was born the night MP was summon, but far from Yharnam.

His parents came from Yharnam but flew the city

He's related to Cainhurst a bit. (His mom (Louise) & uncle are from a servant family). The amount of her stress this poor woman had to go through during her pregnancy was quite insane too.

He have an uncle (Lupin) who still live in Yharnam, an old hunter that he don't have news off since some times.

His grandpa on his father side (Blaine/Blair) was an old hunter as well, he's an old friend of Gehrman.

Gehrman literally babysit Lucen's dad (Emil) when he was a baby and save him from being crucified decades later.

Somehow Bloody Crow (Voron) was around when he was born lol. Before he return to Yharnam. Do what you want with all those crazy infos.

Either he became the next crow hunter or baby squid great one.

On my first playthrough I choose "last survivor" but I'm not very settle on what happened exactly besides he got scars on his face for it.

He's a kind individual most of the time except when it's time to kick ass if that make sense.

#bloodborne #my asks #ask game #lucen venator #bloodborne headcanons

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standardquip · 2 months

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Heat Guy J Live Reacts

While watching Gungrave I remembered this show existed. Here are a compilation of discord messages I sent while watching the show over the course of ~2 weeks.

Key points: - This just might be an escaflowne AU - werewolves heck yes - better women than gungrave - surprise "tomatoes in anime" research

do I watch Heat Guy J (26 eps, similar to gungrave) or do I watch Black lagoon (29 eps, sexy guns starring a lady) I'm leaning toward Heat Guy J for my grey haired man quota I'm playing Heat Guy J ep 1 now so far the music is good lol kill bill inspired or kill bill was inspired bythis? I don't remember when either of those came out wow the voices are so much cooler sounding in japanese they just sound lame in english but english uses less brain power so I'll deal I'm gonna play all these at 1.5x speed because I'm on a strict schedule wow the cgi in this anime did not age well

I think this show shares a character designer with escaflowne … I might have to get this soundtrack damn this ost is all over the place but in a good way I'm only 12min into the first ep this is crazy ok alan schezar

hey look, it's Chid Freid all grown up

shut up, emo dildandau

also, they call the don of their mafia "vampire" (that's the title of the position) That's pretty neat

I'm pretty sure that's just a simplified bra design but this is the 2nd time she's shown up and all I can think of when I see her is "furry boobs"

this dude [Claire] seriously is dilandau straight up psychotic

werewolf or werecat? Hmmmmm

WHAT prisoners have their dna altered so when/if they escape prison, their faces are altered to look like beasts That is such an INSANE policy who puts sunflowers on a grave wtf

I started Heat Guy J I'm just starting ep 3 Here's my thoughts so far:

Surprisingly way more interesting than I thought it would be

The OST is god tier imo

Character design is very similar to vision of escaflowne

the android design is unique and cool bonus: at least one werewolf

ep4 it is a werewolf hecc yeah

"Have you seen my bunny?" I think I found Van

oh If we take personality into account This guy is actually folken

hot

this irish jig thing they have for the fight scenes is really entertaining

the russian roulette guy is the werewolf And I'm going back on the folken thing He's definitely Van ep5 I think this will be the last one for me tonight

fun times

[someone else says: Heat Guy J episode 1: October 1, 2002. Kill Bill Vol 1 premiere: October 30, 2003 ]

gonna try and get the next 5 eps of heat guy j done starting with ep 6 alright what's with the tomato symbolism in anime this didn't just come out of nowhere in new anime and now it's in heat guy j

[someone says: So Google has no idea why tomatoes I thought there would be like some sort of analysis on tomatoes as a symbolic device in anime ]

No it's probably not that direct like maybe japan exports a ton of tomatoes or something?

like if potatoes show up in some irish show There's a lot of history behind that (because of the potato famine) regardless of how they are actually used in the show There is a reason Just like how english is always saying "oh my god" or why they say "bless you" when you sneeze That seems benign but the reason for it is because english speakers are/were predominantly christian

Nobody's going to write an essay about why english speakers use "oh my god" or "bless you" in mass media It's something ingrained in the culture, so you'd have to look in a different context (different from its connection to why it shows up in tv shows a lot) to find the answer you're looking for

I guess ep 6 is "the stock market episode" oh boy they're really hamfisting the lessons in this one already oh boy they just explained the difference between stocks and commodities they also explained shorts (without calling them shorts)

J just caught a bullet with his BARE HANDS and it wasn't even a special scene or anything IT JUST HAPPENED

WHAT dilandau is like "I don't want you around anymore" to his butler so the butler is like "ok" AND THEN PUTS A GUN TO HIS HEAD FOR SUICIDE that's fucking crazy just leave the organization It was a free pass

ep7

cool he's got a scar now also it was just confirmed that THIS ONE is a cat

Back to tomatoes in anime: https://tasteofculture.com/2023/07/17/tomatoes-in-japan/ not as in-depth as I was hoping for

but my armchair guess is it symbolizes a gaijin making a big change to the culture and succeeding maybe an underdog story that also happens to look pretty

I wonder if this is why the tomato is getting spotlight in new anime https://asia.nikkei.com/Business/Science/Japan-approves-gene-edited-super-tomato.-But-will-anyone-eat-it

why do japanese love the tomato so much? :skeptical fry.jpg: https://www.bbcspirits.com/gb/other-alcohols/729-liqueur-japan-la-tomato.html

ok so [person] might be onto something with the "it's just pretty" thing https://www.ishs.org/ishs-article/100_10 this abstract makes it more clear that tomatoes were grown primarily because they were pretty. They didn't start eating them until the 1920s!

starting ep 10 now

alright Let's see if I can get to ep 15 I want to start a different series

ep11 was about mind control You know, it's been awhile since we saw the werewolf guy I wonder if he'll be in ep12

Heat Guy J is way more entertaining than the trailer made it seem but there's no real over-arching plot so I'm kind of bored of it now But not bored enough of it that I am ok abandoning it without finishing HELL YEAH WEREWOLF GUY IS IN THIS ONE oh lame they reused the animation from the other episode 😔

ep13 (yay) if I could finish this series today, that would be cool idk if I can keep focused on it much longer though I actually kind of want to go to bed… :reigensweat: (it's only 6pm here)

Starting ep15 The last one for today oh damn they legit destroyed heat guy j they just gave the main character super lsd

… j will make a full recovery damn plot armor

damn MC's (Daisuke) got plot armor from the super lsd too what a letdown

well ep15 is over and nothing has fundamentally changed I'm going to bed I guess And by "Bed" i mean laying down and browsing reddit on my phone til I fall asleep

ok let's see if I can get through 16 - 20 of heat guy j tonight

ep16 MC's brother, alan with glasses, was shot and is in the hospital. I guess he doesn't have plot armor. Meanwhile, dildandau's organization tries to overthrow him because he's too psychotic I wasn't paying much attention, I'm not sure if it succeeded or not

ep17 continues this plot MC & J leave the city and MC smells clean air and grass for the first time He doesn't like nature smells one random side character is the voice of those toonami music video narrator's (outlaw star narrator?) and it's sooo weird

hell yeah werewolf is back werewolf guy aka van is actually just a deus ex He only appeared for 5 seconds to make plot armor for MC 😩 ep18 MC got fired from the special unit. So he and J are now no longer partners alan is out of the hospital I think MC is going after the gang organization that dildandau used to be head of. is currently head of? It's still confusing

ok looks like dildandau is uhhh not present mentally and is maybe on the run So I guess the coup succeeded lol dildandau's character name is claire rival crime gangs are all after claire because they need his eyes to defeat some retinal scanner to access a ton of gold

J has been re-activated to be the plot armor for MC, who happens to be in the same room as clair currently while this gang war is going on yadda yadda somehow MC got the special unit formed again ep19 MC trying to recruit werewolf to the new special unit oh werewolf history episode yay

werewolf joined them yay ep20 Probably the last one before bed tonight There's 26 eps total, so maybe I can finish it tomorrow ep20 today we learn lightsabers just casually exist in this universe oh There's also an evil clone of J apparently

the evil J is trying to kill the MCs but normal J is nowhere to be found I wonder why that is oh there he is finally J vs J battle has commenced J is so OP evil J is dead now ehhhh let's watch ep 21, then call it some random side character has lost his black cat, named juliet aaaand now he's dead

juliet sees it And with his dying breath, he reaches for the cat "I have to make sure that you get home" Sad surprisingly powerful for random side character who has never shown up before oh wait He has shown up before lmao his name is romeo of course he'd name his cat juliet poor juliet

ok ep21 done bed now finish heat guy j tomorrow hopefully

alright let's see if we can watch the last 5 eps of heat guy j today beginning ep 22 this time the killer machine is A WOMAN! you know, this show has more women than the last one (Gungrave), which is good, but so far every single "evil" woman has been mind controlled meaning apparently women don't have the power to be bad of their own accord So that's kind of weird that it's happened twice now

the mechanic for J is very obviously in love with him I mean it was obvious from the first ep she was introduced but now it's even more obvious This looks like it's going to turn into "the beach episode"

oh shit, the island's owned by sephiroth! 😂

ep 23 There's a reoccuring small girl photographer character. She sells photos from a carriage on the street with a mule. So we start this ep with her carriage (which is also her house) burning to the ground girl is stoic, mom is crying and sobbing Girl says "Darn. I forgot my camera. I bet I could've sold a photo of this to the news for some money"

monica (the girl) now lives with the special squad and she is spitting some straight facts J has agreed to pretend to be monica's dad She is using him as a stage performer so she can get money LOL Now she's using him to gamble haha

so you're telling me that in all the years MC has been carrying this bullet pendant around his neck, he never once tried to open it? give me a break Monica opened it and found a memory card inside which is a thing MC needed to solve a crime anyway, ep24 time woman assassin! is she acting of her own accord though? Let's find out

Turns out MC's brother, Alan (actually named Shun) was the evil one all along! Oh Female assassin is actually J's technician! womp womp and shun just killed her sad trombone.mp3 and now he's controlling J!

oh no.jpg

ep25 begins (second to last episode) claire/dildandau makes a triumphant return, to tell MC his brother is the one behind this! Because MC was too dumb to figure it out himself for some reason rather than MC fighting J, beautiful werewolf deus ex appears out of nowhere and forces J into sleep mode

something weird is happening with alan's voice I'm predicting he is actually an android as well Let's see if this bet pays off dildandau got his organization back

same face syndrome killed me the assassin was shun/alan's assistant, not J's technician time to start the final ep, ep26

this is dumb the anime is too episodic now what do I want to watch next? (even though ep26 is still going on in the background) - High Card - Link Click season 2 - Blood Blockade Battlefront - Grenadier - Noein - Black Lagoon

Currently I am interested in lots of guns and gray haired men idk which is more important so maybe a good 50/50 ratio is perfect 🤔 well if we go in download date order, I should do Black Lagoon next… MC to evil brother: "The only think I'm here to kill… Is your anger" 😂

plot armor is in full effect in this episode now there's fireworks because some random deus ex kills everyone that mattered to the coup evil brother tries to kill himself nothing matters evil brother is not an android sad evil brother does not die and decides to not be evil anymore they gave him amnesty This has less stakes than an MCU movie MC goes on a kino's journey without J series ends super lame I am going to make a very nonsensical decision and start High Card next oh no its japanese with subs only! 😩 I don't want to deal with that right now Guess I'll go with Black Lagoon

I finished Heat Guy J It's too episodic for my tastes Also the plot armor was super thick I have started Black Lagoon I'm on ep9 currently It's much better (Heat Guy J OST was still amazing though) the only thing black lagoon is missing is a silver haired guy

well there's 29 eps... More than enough time for one to show up

#heat guy j #sqreacts #live reacts #heat guy j live reacts #escaflowne au #werewolves #tomatoes in anime

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