#ANYWAY I find it fascinating

[revvethasmythh]

the thing about imogen saying that "if getting rid of delilah means getting rid of [launda] too, it's not worth it" is that it doesn't really change anything, does it? yes it provides laudna with reassurance that she is loved regardless of what lives in her head, but it doesn't mean that imogen doesn't still have negative feelings about delilah being there. "I love you more than I hate delilah" doesn't mean she isn't still disgusted by delilah. I get the sense that this is not an important distinction for imogen--she's said her piece, she's told laudna that she matters more, and that's the end of it for her. laudna matters more. her meaning is crystal clear: I love you and I'm choosing you.

but laudna has been obsessed with imogen saying she was disgusted by delilah watching them. she said herself she can't stop thinking about it, and marisha has said she can't stop thinking about it either, out of game. as far as they know currently, delilah's soul is twined in and around laudna's to the point where they are indistinguishable. the only way to get rid of delilah is to lose laudna. laudna doesn't know where she ends and delilah begins. imogen loves her, but imogen is disgusted by delilah. how does that work if they are one and the same? how does laudna cope with the fact that an inextinguishable part of herself is both genuinely evil and hated by the person she loves the most? at what point does being disgusted by delilah become being disgusted by a piece of laudna herself?

#it's WILD and fascinating and very difficult #I think it's a super interesting dynamic and I really want to see where this leads #because unless they find a way to get rid of delilah without killing laudna #how DO you have a long-term relationship with this hanging between you two? #and again I think it's a thing where Imogen just assumes they'll ''deal with it'' in some unspecified manner and it'll be fine #because love triumphs all right? that's how it has to be #but i'm not sure laudna thinks that #then again we'll see! who knows! it's interesting though! #cr spoilers #anyway i WILL maintag this one because i really like this one #critical role

[arctic-bookclub]

something about how phil has missa’s volume turned up because of the time missa was playing on a laptop at a hotel with a low volume mic, something about how despite his mic being normal now phil hasn’t turned his volume down not even one bit despite always changing everyone else’s volumes when needed, something about how regardless of how many people are in the room missa is always the loudest in phil’s pov, always the easiest to hear, something about how you can always hear missa over everyone else from phil’s pov, something about how that doesn’t bother phil in the slightest, something about this never being aknowledged by phil and something about it not needing to be, for it’s how it’s supposed to be

#qsmp #death duo #deathduo #qsmp philza #qsmp missa #pissa #every time phil and missa are in the same room with others #you can always hear missa over everyone else phil’s pov #in phil’s pov* #and i find it so fascinating #like it’s so obvious and i’m always surprised phil does nothing about it #he’s adjusted volumes while missa is talking and yet he never even touches missa’s volume slider #doesn’t even glance at it #like it feels purposeful almost and that drives me insane /positive #also the potential implications in character drive me insane even further #it’s like qphil sees qmissa as the persob in the room he never wants to miss a single word from #person* #he always wants to hear what he has to say over everyone else #goddd #anyway #this post was prompted by me seeing clip of the deathduo hug before they got yeeted into purgatory #and it feeling so off that missa’s ’hug me’ wasn’t loud and clear #because the clip was from missa’s pov and not phil’s #anyway ignore the typos it’s such an ungodly hour that i refuse to say it and i’m on mobile

[humming-fly]

don’t wanna get too into it bc… nsfw but how does asexual greed work when he literally says that he wants sex and women? is he just not attracted to them in that way or–

well in terms of nitty-gritty homunculi biology they are quite literally an asexual species, like father reproduces via budding lol. And then given his physical embodiment of lust herself seemingly has no sex drive and is instead Way more interested in killing it's a pretty easy conclusion that as a species they just have no sexual interests because why would they (pretty sure father as the dwarf in the flask had some comments about finding human pairings distasteful, and given all his kids are just offshoots of his personality i can't see that shifting much haha (also more shitposty take but there's the much funnier observation that all of the homunculi come with their funny little onsies literally built-in to their regenerative code so there is an incredibly real chance they're all just ken dolls down there anyways))

as for why greed himself says stuff like wanting women and sex etc., i mean he also says he wants money and power and the finer things in life and then spends his time happily hanging out in a dingy dive bar with no real long-term goals besides 'hang out with my friends and investigate immortality which is definitely for me and not for anyone else that i'd be sad to see die no siree don't ask me why i'm doing this if i'm already virtually immortal'

so yeah it's a fun aspect of his character that greed says he tells the truth but he will also just sort of...lie about his own drives to himself and others all the time lol - i'd almost chalk it up to his love of performance but there's def also some intentional personal misdirection going on, which was very obvious as greedling when ling (correctly) calls him out on acting like all he wants is power when really the only thing he wants is to have friends

basically he says he wants money and power and women and sex because that's what common human desires are but then he makes absolutely 0 effort to follow through on any of those claims because deep down that isn't actually anything he's interested in

#greed: haha yeah I want money and sex and the finer things #also greed: what if I lived in a sewer #anyways i'm sure i've made these arguments more eloquently before but I can't be bothered to find those asks again right now haha #but yeah greed is a funny guy who is also a Fascinating character study when you remember he represents a driving part of what was the dwar #a lot of bravado hiding a genuine desire for human connection #reply #fma #meta #i suppose lol

[thejasontoddarchives]

Brothers in Blood will trick you into thinking it’s just a silly crack scenario brought to life and Jason just concocted this plan for shits and giggles. Then you get a single page like this:

Nightwing (1996-) #121

that reveals he wanted/desperately needed shreds of acceptance even if it was coated in layers of resentment irritation and doubt after going through this:

Batman (1940-) #650

And it had to be from someone who isn’t Bruce

#jason todd #dick grayson #dc #brothers in blood #look sometimes people need to find the least vulnerable way to be vulnerable and this was that #because the fact is he is vulnerable but the last time he revealed that without undercutting the moment with jokes and giggles #it turned out fabulously wrong for him #if he distracts Dick as much as possible so he'll never find out how much of a mess he is right now or what he actually wants #he can still get that confirmation that Dick cares about him without risking something happening that would be his second final straw #even the telegram where he finally sort of reveals what this was about by thanking Dick for still having his back he has to make it wacky #the ww3 comic that preludes this is even more fascinating #because I do think the cover art is ... impactful? #Jason's holding the Nightwing suit in one hand and the red hood helmet in the other and looking solemnly at his Robin suit glass case #granted it is the pill helmet but still. anyway #he’s doing this not long after Bruce slit his throat and prior to that told Alfred to keep the glass case as in the cave in uth #because meeting Jason again changed nothing and he might as well still be dead to him so that uber-tombstone stays #ofc Jason never heard that convo but it's clear he put the pieces together by himself now while looking at the case #and he’s stranded as to what he should do + silently devastated #because he knows now that he doesn’t matter (in the only way that does matter) to the one person who was the most important in his life #after his parents were gone #so then he decides to come to Dick with this because he really is the only other person who was in his life if only very briefly #anyway that was just my interpretation of that cover but how Jason is actually written in the story is just … off in many ways #but yea #this page and that ww3 cover did kinda solidify what his motivation was for the brothers in blood arc #it was good #if only the execution of everything else was better … The premise/foundation was there

[sticks-and-souls]

I really hope Din gets to Sundari and finds the evidence that Bo Katan was a fucking founding member of the resurgence of Death Watch and played a direct role in handing Mandalore over to Darth Maul, and I hope they call the episode The Mandalorian and the Audacity of This Bitch.

#this is not an anti bo katan post #I LOVE her character #but I find her so fascinating literally because of the walking contradiction that she poses #and the hypocrisy she seems to employ to compensate for her shame #NOT by pretending her past didn’t exist #like it keeps feeling like the showrunners are handling her #anyways #bo katan kryze #the mandalorian #the mandalorian s3 #the mandalorian season 3 #din djarin #mandalore

[uhbasicallyjustmilex]

quotes from alex turner's favourite authors that make me want to put my face through a wall:

"although i have never been an actor in the strict sense of the word, i have nevertheless, in real life, always carried about with me a small folding theatre" - vladimir nabokov, despair

"there is a terrible emptiness in me, an indifference that hurts," - albert camus

"there is no trap so deadly as the trap you set for yourself" - raymond chandler

"at eight, he had once told his mother that he wanted to paint air" - vladimir nabokov

"no man ever understands quite his own artful dodges to escape from the grim shadow of self-knowledge" - joseph conrad

"everything i've ever let go of has claw marks on it" - david foster wallace

"we're all lonely for something we don't know we're lonely for. how else to explain the curious feeling that goes around feeling like missing somebody we've never even met?" - david foster wallace

"i turn over a new leaf every day, but the blots show through" - keith waterhouse

"the truth will set you free. but not until it's finished with you" - david foster wallace

"curiosity is insubordination in its purest form" - vladimir nabokov

"i'm me and nobody else; and whatever people think i am or say i am, that's what i'm not, because they don't know a bloody thing about me" - alan sillitoe

"we live as we dream; alone” - joseph conrad

"i liked, as i like still, to make words look self-conscious and foolish, to bind them by mock marriage of a pun, to turn them inside out, to come upon them unwares" - vladimir nabokov, despair

"whatever you get paid attention to for is never what you think is most important about yourself" - david foster wallace

"i continued to stir my tea long after it had done all it could with the milk” - vladimir nabokov, despair

"i remained too much inside my head and ended up losing my mind" - edgar allan poe

"all the information i have about myself is from forged documents" - vladimir nabokov, despair

"how odd i can have all this inside me and to you its just words" - david foster wallace

"you will never be happy if you continue to search for what happiness consists of. you will never live if you're looking for the meaning of life" - albert camus

#all of these are from books/authors alex has explicitly mentioned being a fan of #god i wish he talked more about what he reads because i find the books and authors people are drawn to fascinating #it's such an insight into someone's psyche #then again maybe that's why he doesn't talk about it a lot - the books you love are quite a personal thing #but yeah #having read a few things i just thought i'd compile a little selection of quotes from his favourite books/authors that #idk - stuck out to me as being very alex #and it's safe to safe i have well and truly destroyed my own heart in the process #i also now absolutely have to read despair by vladimir nabokov #it's one of his that i haven't read but i had a little flick through it and oh my god i can totally see why alex is so into it #this list was almost entirely just quotes from that book #there are SO MANY that are just painfully alex #(in my mind anyway) #anyway #enough rambling from me #i might have to do a part two of this at some point #alex turner #arctic monkeys #lulu posts

[blindtigerart]

Did you rummage to fruition??

I’ve had this in my unfinished wip for ages even tho i finished succession way back. anyways the show is great and i love how it makes me insane over rich people

#succession #tom wambsgans #greg hirsch #tomgreg #THESE TWO MAKE ME INSANE!!!!! they’re so awful for each other but their interactions are fascinating #i want to study them under a microscope #anyways i DID try to do a new painting style with this so #took a lot from leyendecker but also wanna add a shitton of texture #im rambling but im finding if i analyze and talk about my process? it like. helps me figure out what to do next

[boojangs]

Someone called me a sadist for YMU. And that they hate me and I should go to hell. 👋

#and then they said it was character abuse?? #and that i don't write romance i write misery?? #i find people's opinions fascinating #anyway i stand by Enid's reaction #so many of us know what lying and betrayal feels like and it isn't pretty. #but telling me to go to hell and that my readers also live in hell is too far #at the end of the day it's a story and if you don't believe they can come back from this you weren't paying attention <3

[nerdie-faerie]

I'm once again thinking about the missed opportunities to have Klaus and Kol bond more. Part of Klaus' whole motivation as a vampire is to get his werewolf part back and to finally be stronger than Mikael (sort of, I'm simplifying) both of which can be obtained by breaking his curse. But Kol? Kol is the only other original that can relate to having a fundamental part of themself ripped away from them. Klaus might not have known he was a werewolf until he killed, but he likely still had a connection he couldn't explain, as evident by him going to watch the wolves transform. And something he'd never been able to explain was now gone. He might only be able to realise the connection afterwards through its absence.

Kol though. Kol had grown up with magic, a connection to nature and the world around him in a way the rest of his siblings supposedly didn't have. And then he gets turned. And not only has his baby brother died, his father has just murdered him and the rest of his siblings after forcing them to drink human blood, which he'll later learn. Now, not only does he have to deal with the grief of Henrik's death and also his own but also the loss of his magic. A loss that's likely only worsened by Kol being a self-proclaimed child prodigy.

Kol is pretty much the only one who could understand what Klaus is going through with the binding of his wolf. We know Kol searched for ways to get his magic back/carry on practicing magic in the same way that Klaus was looking for ways to break his curse. While Klaus likely could still feel his wolf there despite being bound, Kol has no access to his magic anymore. I just think they should've been able to bond or connect over their shared loss of an intrinsic aspect of their selves at the hands of their parents

#TVD #The Mikaelsons #Kol Mikaelson #Klaus Mikaelson #briefly back on my the originals shouldve gotten to be a family goddammit and as someone from a big family im personally offended bs #i did right a lil snippet about them bonding over this that i havent posted yet for the joml verse but still think its an unexplored concep #need more witch!kol acknowledgement honestly. just need more content of my boy #anyway. klaus having a fascination with the moon and kol telling him about celestial events and how it affects his magic when theyre boys #klaus losing that connection to the moon feeling lost & extra tempermental feeling his wolf claw at its binds and vowing to break his curse #kol determined to get his magic back at any cost relating to that devasting loss and promising to help him find a loophole for his curse #kol who becomes extra reckless and determined when he learns that theres a way to break klaus' curse so maybe he can get his magic back too #that knowledge and recklessness combined with his loss of magic driving him to become the volatile vampire that we see #that leads to him being daggered repeatedly but that first time breaks something in that bond between him & klaus that never fully recovers #it makes him bitter and resentful only fueling his reckless behaviour particularly when there seems to be no leads on reclaiming his magic #that he becomes distant from his siblings in the process especially with finn still daggered but that distance only cements the idea #to his siblings that hes a danger and cant be trusted that he needs to be daggered if theyre to stay safe from mikael #the loss of his magic leading to his spiral as a vampire and him being ostracised by his family > actual tvdu kol canon #klaus being trapped in a room staring at the corpse of his little brother knowing he never repaired that relationship with him #and now he never can so he refuses to look away as penance and a reminder of his failings to his little brother #*edit: one of the reblogs on this post is the author of big bad wolf and honestly she does an amazing job at portraying the mikaelsons #as actual siblings if you havent read it its one of my favourites for characterisations but we need more 😭 i want it to be the norm

[cuubism]

hello friends. despite my 9 million existing dreamling wips i'm feeling the need to branch out a bit for the sake of my mental variety. what pairing other than dreamling should i write a little something for? could be romantic or platonic

other way of phrasing i guess: any pairings you really want to see more fics for in the fandom?

#i actually do have one someone asked me for ages ago i've been meaning to get to so i'll try to do that too #bonus points if it still involves dream bc you know i love dream XD #probably wont do any romantic pairings /between/ the endless because well yeah #but open to exploring pretty much anything else... feel free to send whatever if you want. dont worry about if i'll like it #if i can't vibe with it or find it uncomfy i just won't write it no harm no foul #not me soliciting little prompts fully knowing that motivation is a fickle beast and who knows if i would get to writing them XD i want #to though! or like. idk. if anyone wants to share headcanons about their favorite pairings i am happy to receive them #the sandman #a couple that are bouncing around my head already: #rose meeting desire. this could be really interesting i think (they are of course her grandparent) #calliope and lucienne post-calliope's imprisonment: i think their dynamic could be interesting since they both have/had close relationships #with dream. but of course calliope's relationship with him fell apart. i think lucienne with whatever context of it she had would probably #be sympathetic to calliope's perspective but still staunchly On Dream's Side so the speak bc she is ultimately very loyal to him... could b #an interesting convo. #additionally - calliope and johanna. both suffered things recently. both had curious interactions with dream where they recently saw both #his vicious side AND a kinder more understanding side of him... [dream gave rachel a peaceful death at johanna's request etc] #but they've come out of their suffering really differently (granted it was different types of suffering. but) #wow here i am asking for people's ideas and then just coming up with my own XD #anyway #wait two others: i'm fascinated by the potential dynamic of lucienne and the corinthian they only had like one short scene together in the #show but can you imagine. spending eons being loyal to dream and then going opposite directions with that loyalty. being among dream's inne #circle so to speak except lucienne is her own entity while corinthian was /created/ by dream. they have the most fascinating venn diagram o #personality traits and narrative positions... #secondly. and this is kind of crack. but like. imagine johanna and corinthian in the same room XD 'hi i'm an exorcist and this is my pet #serial killer' 'yeah my lord gave me a vacation to go kill some demons' why doesn't he try to kill johanna? bc she tried to destroy him #first time they met and he can't help but respect it XD

[jojotichakorn]

(open for better quality)

#gmmtv #gmmtv series #thai drama #thai actors #this started as something inspired by all of us being continuously shocked by certain actors’ ages #and discussions about who is older than who and by how many years #but then spiraled into my knowledge of astrology as well #this is all just a little bit of silly fun of course #but i hope it could also be useful or interesting as a reference for birthdays and age differences and such #just because I find that part fascinating and occasionally surprising #anyway i think if i showed this to a psychiatrist they would close the dsm5 and diagnose me as autistic instantly no questions asked

[jasontoddenthusiastt]

“Jason should get over being upset about his death” - he has, he wasn’t angry at Bruce or the world because they failed him and he ended up dying, which he made clear plain as day and that’s about the most reasonable a person who went through what he went through could be

anyway I don’t think these people realize how gory being bludgeoned to near death is, and maybe it's because of the limitations of the medium that scene was presented in

#not to mention he had to process the added heartbreak of his birth mother’s rejection/betrayal at the same time #like yeah he was cocky and smiling in the uth movie go Jason go but that’s also the same movie that drastically changed the context #and tone of that scene by erasing Sheila #kelseethe #I remember the first time reading aditf I got flashbacks to a Korean horror movie that still puts me in a weird place #anyway it was about a serial killer who went around killing people by beating their skulls in with a hammer #one of the plots was centered around a victim who didn’t die after the first attack and even managed to escape at first #long story short she was running around trying to get help and the cops were useless + he ended up finding her again and finished the job #sfx brains skull blood and viscera everywhere #and that’s exactly what happened to Jason you just didn’t see any gore because it’s an American comic #nor did you hear his screams and the sounds from metal making contact with bone and guts #and like I said the uth movie was pretty sanitized too same for the titans show which also downplayed his death lol #anyway I think it’s really forgiving of Jason not to blame Bruce or anyone else for the fact that they let the circumstances lead to that #and to instead only criticize how nothing was done in the aftermath #Idk I always found it a bit fascinating how it doesn’t seem to have dawned on most people including his fans #exactly how violent that experience was

[snackzimmerman]

the goldfinch is so fascinating to me because everything in it is about grief, with his sexuality as a subsection, another core tenant, that centers around (as i believe) the fact that he can't tell his mother about it. and the painting is grief and love itself! the painting represents that moment before his mother died, and he literally put it away and took it out only for boris while blackout drunk, that chunk of his heart, the source of all his pain, and boris thought i want that enough to take it. also the goldfinch is about drugs and a small dog.

#tgf #the goldfinch #donna tartt #TINY sliver of my analysis about this fucking book. #i watched the move a few months ago with my mother and it drove me insane with its changes #dont get me wrong i liked the movie! but theo not being completely gay frankly changed my perception of the storyline #in a fascinating way #theo is born of grief and that finds its way into everything he does #and i think (in a way) he mourns his being queer as a death of the boy his mother knew #even though his grieving self could also be viewed as a different person! #man. MAN. anyway. this book is like 800 pages of difficult but wonderful writing and i brought that shit to college #and so did my qpp after i ranted to them about it enough

[heroesriseandfall]

People absolutely have justifiable criticisms of Countdown to Final Crisis but I will say that Jason’s behavior post-Bruce’s death makes a lot more sense with that context.

Battle for the Cowl mostly just brings up Bruce’s death message for why Jason acted out so massively. But I do think that Jason meeting Earth-51 Bruce who gave him the Red Robin costume so they could fight side by side and then that Bruce was murdered in front of Jason’s eyes after Jason jumped in to help him, and Jason was openly devastated despite only meeting this Bruce that day (Jay killed an alternate Joker for laughing at his reaction)…

…and then Jason comes home and throws away the Red Robin suit to banish the remnants of that trip from himself, only to find out that actually, his Bruce did die too, in his own universe. And then other people dig the RR costume out of the trash to use it. I just think maybe maybe all that’s relevant to Jason going nuts after seeing Bruce’s death message.

#jason todd #bruce wayne #as much as Jason’s characterization is all over the place I find it fascinating anyway and love to draw connections #batfam #heroesriseandfall #bonds: he was the best #battle for the cowl #countdown to final crisis

[eldrichfuck666]

Just got in my game and decided to try new @simandy Mantis hair because my god... I feel like they're so perfect for Ansel 😭 I love him madly and I decided why not even though I'm very much late sksksks

#CAN I DO ANY SCREENSHOT WITHOUT BLOOD? NO. I might have blood kink maaaybe? but I find blood to be beautiful and fascinating anyways #AND ANSEL + BLOOD ARE THE BEST COUPLE SKSKSKKS #I missed him so much :'( my siren boy :'(( AND WHEN I LOADED I NEARLY HAD A HEART ATTACK BECAUSE THE GAME SAID THE SAVE GOT CORRUPTED #I almost started crying lmao #tw blood #cw blood #blood tw #tw insect #tw insects #insects tw #cw butterfly #cw insects #sims 4 screenshots #ts4 screenshots #ts4 cas #sims 4 cas #ts4 screenies #ts4 simblr #simblr #cas pics #*ansel my beloved #I HAVEN'T POSTED HIM FOR SO LONG MY GOOD #I apologize to him on my knees I love him I adore him he's my soul he's my everything 🥺👉🏾👈🏾

[blue-mood-blue]

What if Hua Cheng had memorialized the temple?

I don’t think he did, canonically. I imagine that was a memory he wasn’t keen to linger on, especially not to such an extent as to record it, to hover over the details in his mind and commit it to physical imagery. But I could see where he might - maybe catharsis, so that night can exist somewhere outside of his head. Maybe twisting, spiteful justice, so the world won’t be allowed to forget what it did to his god. Maybe just desperation, to record every shard of Xie Lian that he has in an effort not to lose a single piece while he searches.

It wouldn’t be graphic; I think it would be something more stylized, more symbolic. Xie Lian is tied to his own altar. He has replaced the divine statue that should be there instead, the god made present the way he was for Hua Cheng once, the way he was for all of his people once. He is surrounded by blades, but they aren’t piercing him yet. Hua Cheng can’t do that to him even in paint. Bai Wuxiang is not featured, because Hua Cheng would not force any version of Xie Lian into that monster’s presence, but there is a ghost fire hovering near. There is a small, crushed flower on the ground at the foot of the altar, like it was dropped from the Flower Crowned Prince’s hand moments before. The entire tableau holds its breath in the anticipation of something horrific.

It’s painted in a shadowed corner, with a cloth hung in front of it. Not out of shame, or even because of Hua Cheng’s own trauma - out of respect for the prince’s privacy, unwillingness to make a moment of such incredible, painful vulnerability a spectacle to anyone else without the prince’s say-so.

That doesn’t stop Mu Qing from finding it.

Mu Qing, who was already horrified, Mu Qing, who was looking for Xie Lian to drag him out of the caves immediately because he’d seen a statue that suggested things he would rather not think about in regards to his former prince… Mu Qing brushes the curtain aside in that tucked-away corner and stops.

A hundred blades are pointed at His Highness. A hundred faces leer and sob and stare. And Xie Lian sits at the center of it all, head lowered, waiting for the slaughter.

Is it so unreasonable that Mu Qing takes it for a threat? Is it so unreasonable of Mu Qing to drag Feng Xin to what he’s found, for the both of them to slip an arm around each of the prince’s own and pull him away from wherever that altar is somewhere in the complicated network of twisted, obscene worship? That thing painted on the wall - it can’t have ever happened. They would know. Mu Qing and Feng Xin, who spent every day of their early lives with the prince, beside the prince, trailing along behind the prince… they would know. They would have been there; they would have prevented it. This is the fantasy of a ghost king who laid ruin to thirty-three heavenly officials and found his thirst still unslaked.

(Mu Qing does not consider the eight hundred years of Xie Lian’s life he knows nothing about. Feng Xin does not consider the eight hundred years of Xie Lian’s life he knows nothing about. It’s a habit they’ve grown skilled at, over eight hundred years.)

They don’t explain to Xie Lian, so Xie Lian has no opportunity to explain to them what they saw. And Mu Qing isn’t wrong, when he concludes that Xie Lian has been stalked and watched and hunted since he was seventeen. He isn’t wrong. He just doesn’t know, yet, what direction the threat is coming from. There’s no time for anyone to tell him, or Feng Xin, who tied the restraints and provided the sword.

They’ll find out. Masks are made to be removed.

#heaven official's blessing #tgcf #hua cheng #xie lian #mu qing #feng xin #couldn't decide if this should be a text post or a ficlet so it kinda became both #anyway i definitely don't see this as canon #but i am consumed with the idea of WHAT IF #like i am already fascinated by any and all versions of mu qing and feng xin finding out about the temple #and like. what if there was no context. what if they assumed the threat was an ongoing thing. #(it is) #it just... also fascinates me that YEAH - mu qing cottoned on to the fact that xie lian had someone who was unhealthily fascinated with him #but. BUT. #He Did Not Know #and that is to me more horrifying because of who it actually turned out to be #anyway #all of this to say that i am so interested in situations where xie lian's pain is revealed and also the horror #of seeing it as something that might still happen and not even knowing that this is a horror that has already happened #the horror of finding out that you were far too late to prevent it and you never even KNEW #the horror of finally knowing the shape of that formless guilt you felt #i have feelings about it can you tell :P #this will probably not be the last time i explore this space