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screechingkingdomhottub · 4 months

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RATING DIFFERENT MENTAL HEALTH COUNSELLING SERVICES (UK)

Soo bit about me is im bisexual, trans, autistic, depressed and have had some Bad Coping Mechanisms so trigger warnings for sh, suicidal thoughts, alcoholism and addictions, anything else lemme know and i'll edit this. When I was a young boy, I realised bad things in my brain and after struggling finally got encouraged to reach out for help, here's how i'd rate my experiences. First though, regardless of any of these ratings you should seek help, because even if the help sucks which it might, you get a little boost in your brain that you're trying and it could be the difference between 1 day but that 1 day is special. I believe in you. As someone who has been struggling for 10 years now, it does get better but your struggle doesnt magically stop. So this is in no way me saying "all help sucks dont bother" but the exact opposite like always choose to seek for help.

First we have Mr Big Boi Jo AKA the samaritans, I have reached out to them so many times since I was like 13. The email feature is amazing like being able to sorta control when you are willing to not only send the message but also check the response is wonderful. I'd pour my heart and soul out and then be able to step away and recover from that vulnerability, be excited for when I'd get an email back, if I didn't feel like responding in that moment then I would not have to. But they have a tendency to sign post you quite easily like i've been sent to chris at lgbt , childline, some autism stuff that rubbed me the wrong way. It can feel kinda like you're getting dismissed and told to bugger off. "But that's not what they're doing!" oh right i forgot people in mental health crises should think more clearly, how dare i think they may have thinking issues and be sensitive in those times, ridiculous of me /s so I'm gonna rate them 6.5/10. This also probably depends on who you get. I'm gonna have to DQ [email protected] because I genuinely forgot I had any interaction with them, they seem alright and I suppose if you're struggling with gender and sexuality they're worth a shot? I'm rather comfortable in my identity now so I don't want to take that resource away from people for any experiment like this. CHILDLINE - Not just that one phone number you call if your parents are abusive. Genuinely childline is so misrepresented due to what we classify as abuse like if you are under 18, you can go on childline and play games, have a live chat feature with counsellors, ask on message boards, view message boards or send as an email instead of the chat. You can choose! I think it would be amazing even for adults but once again, no stealing resources. "But I have DID and it's complicated cause my little needs help-" dude I'm not qualified for that, you probably know more than I do like don't put this on me. I cannot remember one negative experience with them. I just remember being scared and messaging people, OH AND THE NOTES YOU CAN ASK THEM TO READ NOTES SO THEY'RE CAUGHT UP ON STUFF EVEN IN LIVE CHAT. 9.5/10 would be a 10 if I was still a child but I'm unfortunately 23 so im bitter. It may have changed but now but I strongly encourage people to try it because I didn't want to because I thought it was only for kids being physically abused, it's also for like teenagers who are self harming. SHOUT - Oh Shout, you are the most 50/50 out of these. I genuinely use SHOUT more than samaritans now but it can go really bad. I message and am like "hello i wanna drink myself to death" but if i do that on like friday nights or something, the wait times are massively long and I've found some other way to soothe myself but when they are there they do talk very gently, they offer valid resources about things like as pdfs this time not just links to websites of people that can help. It's similar to counselling in person imo so it's about vibes sometimes. 8/10 or wait/10 damn those wait times KOKO - I'm glad it exists but haven't found much help from it personally. I do like that it sorta puts less stress on people that want to help social media accounts in crisis like that's a very important thing we didn't have when I first had the internet and it caused a lot of damage but in terms of the rating of how it helped 4/10.

GP - OMG GPs right? Anyone in the UK that's been to a GP for depression will immediately be thinking "oh right a WALK ADN SOME TEA RIGHT??" because that's always your first offer. Always. I should also mention I never went to CAMHs because of how my GP saw me, I went to a different centre for at risk youths in a different town in the most wonderful and bizarre therapy I've ever had but that place has shut down and there's absolutely no way other people have had that experience because whenever I say this stuff to people they may as be looking at me like I'm talking about narnia. GPs don't really seem to take you seriously until you're 18. But people don't seem to be really listening, your antidepressants aren't gonna stop your depression. They're going to fight it a little bit but you gotta do other stuff to get the endorphins and that's where the walks and exercise come in. People will bitch about theirs not working and they don't listen to what the GP says like "they keep upping my dose cause it isnt working!" then you find out that person has been drinking every other day which cancels those meds out. So with all that said, GPs are getting a 5/10. Some of mine were really helpful, some sucked, age is a big factor.

I hope you are able to use this info or even just now be more aware of all the help you can get in the new year. It's time to get happy again <3

#mental health

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ladychlo · 2 years

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Hello:) srry for the rant... so all the shit talking from literally queer people about Harry today (this has nothing to do with Harry btw it could be anyone) ... It just upsets me as a young queer person that there's people in this community (lot of them) who think you must be out to be a part of the community. I mean the community was created to keep safe each other. Not to pick and choose who's going to be valid. Also I identify as a queer person and I don't want to label my gender bc to me it's something I don't see... Why is that wrong that I don't want to comment on my gender? I'm i not valid; or lying? I don't get it..

Also saw someone say that if Harry is queer he should come out bc he's a public figure and that will help other queer people?? Like what?

Why people think just because they are a part of the lgbt+ community they can pick and choose who to support and who's valid? I don't get them. It's sad

hi love,

you're absolutely right! and I've talked about this while ago and I cant stop screaming it:

Gatekeeping queerness does nothing but perpetuates the same system that oppresses queer people.

it pains me when its queer people who vocalize negative opinions about other people's queerness. that queer people invalidate other queer people's experiences just because it doesn't align with theirs. the core of the queer experience is survival and resilience and joy, this core is shared by the community but every queer person has their own experience and I think some queer people ignore how nuanced that situation can be.

some feel entitled over others' queerness, this sort of entitlement is absolutely everything against what the community is about. once you as a queer person feel like you owe other people their queerness you should stop and say what the fuck am I doing?

check your entitlement and check your privilege as well, not everyone can be out, not everyone is safe to be out, god there are people who don't even know that they're queer because they are isolated, denied any space, any representation, any words or voice, there are queer people who can't even reclaim their bodies and their identities, they cant step out of their house without the fear of being muted, there are countries that still jail, kill, torture, suffocate the life out of queer people, and not every queer person lives in a place where they are recognized or protected by any Anti-discrimination law, some queer people just want to survive in their own way, just in silence. do you know how is it hard to even accept yourself when you dont even know who you are? let along the feeling of other queer people invalidating it. all this, and you feel like you have the right to decide who can claim queerness for themselves or not? how fucking entitled can you be to say that out loud, to say someone if not out they cant be valid, they cant claim their queerness the way they want.

check your entitlement and if your queerness is used to invalidate other queer people then you are doing nothing but regurgitating the same system that made you realize you were queer, the same system that isolated you and denied you your rights, the same system that oppressed your people. and being queer is far away from that, it's absolutely the opposite of that, all your anger shouldn't be aimed against queer folks, but the system that enabled and created an environment that made queer people have to fight and resist and come out. the community was never and will never be exclusionary, far opposite from that, it's a safe place for you to breathe, to be heard to see that there is nothing fucking wrong with you, and to claim your queerness the way you want it, literally your queerness is whatever you want it to be, however you want to express it.

your queerness shouldn't oppress, it shouldn't judge, it shouldn't invalidate, and certainly shouldn't create interpersonal opression.

also just to add on the matter of Harry and Louis, I'm not gonna talk about their self-expression and how they express and see their queerness, because that's their fucking business and it up to them to feel safe and comfortable to share that. but I'm talking about how it's unfortunate not everyone outside the fandom can see their act of community, have you seen their shows? who the fuck has a full venue or arena drenched with pride flags and rainbow light? they created a safe environment for queer people to be, to exist, to express themselves, and that's fucking brave man, they don't need to come out to inspire other queer people, they don't need to come out to make other queer feel validated and seen. stop centering queer experience around coming out, stop invalidating queer experiences because they don't align with your expectations and fuck just stop gatekeeping queerness.

#I am sorry about the long ass rant but I had too

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thegyusorcerer · 3 years

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hello again... sorry to come back with another questiom but your last answer really helped me out...

is it.. normal to feel guilt for being aro and/or ace in some way? like... i see beautiful and handsome anf charming women in relationships with eachother and. everything in me craves that kind of love and bond like nothing else (not me realising I'm most likely a lesbian in the middle of writing this ask) but the thought of anyone approaching me with it in real life scares me.

part of me thinks i just dont trust anyone to give them a chance, or its some weird form of internalised lesbophobia... but i just... the thought of having a wife, and being a wife to my wife fills my body with auch warmth and want and bliss... but in reality...

i dont know... and i feel bad because i dont... sorry if this is alot but any advice would really be appreciated. thank you 💫

tw // internalized aphobia, internalized homophobia, religious trauma.

No need to apologize, I'm always open to listen and to help with what I can 🥺❤.

I think this is something important to disccuss bc even if no one talks about it, I believe it's a common feeling between aros and/or aces. Personally, I've also felt this way and I bet if we ask, many more aspecs have felt it too. Wanting a relationship, a companion or partner to take care of and be affectionate with... but feeling discouraged that you'll never get to experience that bc you don't feel romantic/sexual attraction.

You don't have to feel guilty for being aro/ace... you didn't choose to be aspec. You just are. You didn't choose to feel this way so, how can you feel guilty for things you can't change? 👀

I think we've all seen people in relationships and wanted that too... but deep down we know we won't have that bc we do not experience romantic / sexual attraction. Or we won't experience a relationship, at least not in the same way, which is the point I want to make. You CAN be aromantic/asexual and still desire a relationship. You CAN have a relationship (romantic, sexual, queerplatonic, however you want to label it) and it doesn't make you any less aro / ace 💚💜.

"The thought of anyone approaching me irl scares me."

I've felt this way too. The mere idea of someone (regardless of their gender) approaching me and asking me out, triggers my fight or flight response and really makes me anxious. First, bc I don't feel the same way about that person, chances are I don't like you that way and second, bc it sucks to say no and "break someone's heart," you know? But I also remind myself that I won't FORCE myself to say yes and perform romance, perfom something I am not feeling for this person...

So I understand your feeling!

It may also mean you're somewhere in the aro spectrum and the thought of dating someone you don't feel attracted to is not appealing, but if it were someone you shared a bond with or connected emotionally with first, could make you say yes. (See terms like demiromantic, grayromantic if you're interested.)

Either way, please know this is a very common aromantic experience; you're not alone in this 🥺💚.

"the thought of having a wife and being a wife fills my body with warmth and bliss but in reality... I don't know."

story of my life HAHAHA. Let me explain: for a long time, after accepting I'm aro, I thought I was romance repulsed & this was because the idea of marrying and dating a man, kissing, being romantic and affectionate with one, made me super uncomfortable and I knew I had never felt attracted to one so I was obviously aro. Emphasis on "a man" 👀.

After dismantling the internalized homophobia I'd live with, due to religious indoctrination; I was able to ask myself "do I like girls?" (which had been a recurring identity crisis I'd had but ignored in the past). I knew I was asexual by then, so I was wondering if I was really aromantic or simply homoromantic. And during this questioning is that I understood I really was arospec (probably demiromantic, still don't know. Aromantic Spectrum! 🥰) but still lesbian oriented & not romance repulsed.

I came to terms with being romance indifferent/favorable. I do want a relationship (romantic or ambiguously so) but it's not a priority of mine. It's not something I NEED but something I would consider if someone I became emotionally close with asked for. I hope all of this made sense 🤍.

My point is that I also desire a companion, a wife (that would be lovely), & yes, it is something I've fantasized about. But I know that because I'm arospec, romantic feelings don't come easy to me & I seriously doubt I'll ever feel that way about someone, but the future is unpredictable. And I try not to overthink it. If it happens, it happens. But I've also come to terms with being by myself and loving my own companionship too 💘.

I have accepted that a partner isn't a priority of mine and that I don't need a romantic relationship, but it is something I would consider if given a chance.

In conclusion....

you can be aro/ace and desire a companion. you can be aro/ace and have a relationship (romantic-ish) & you're still part of these communities 💚💜

#I hope this was helpful! 🤍#sorry if it became kind of long lol #aro #ace #aromantic #asexual #answered ask #romance favorable #aroace #lesbian #aroace lesbian #partnering aro

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gb-patch · 3 years

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Ask Answers: January 28th, 2021 (Part 2)

Here we’ve got asks that aren’t to ask a question but are just really nice messages. Thank you all for sending us such kind comments ;v;. It’s seriously heartwarming to see so many people having good experiences with the game. I don’t even know what to say to such sweet responses.

We’ll keep doing our best and thank you again to each and every one of you for giving Our Life a chance ❤!

Hello! I've been following this account and have been following the development of 'Our Life' for a few months now, and I just wanted to say thank you for all your hard work and dedication you have put into the game. It astonishes me how much choice you have during the sequence of Our Life and am excited to play the full version now, I am downloading it as I write this message. I've had a great time seeing the demo transition into to the full game and just wanted to write two words. Thank you.

Anhhhhffbgdfbhujk!!! Congratulations on the release, I’m playing the game right now! Thank you all for your hard work and I can’t wait for the Step 3 DLC to come out, I’ll probably wait for the Step 3 DLC to come out to experience everything, but until then, I still have a lot to play. Thank you once again!

finished my first playthrough just now. it just felt so wholesome ??? 100/10 would do it again. i laughed. i cried. i got angry. i felt second-hand embrassment— i got so into it i was left in literal tears after getting my first ending. the art, the storyline, the music, and COVE HOLDEN– UGH IT WAS LITERAL PERFECTION ❤ THE WAIT WAS WORTH IT. THANK YOU FOR MAKING SUCH AN AMAZING GAME 🥺😭 this made my 2020 better, i can't wait for step 4 in 2021 ❤❤

So I was following you guys on itchio for years and uhh did I stay up til 6 am on a school night to finish the game? Yes. Did I sob my eyes out during step 3 as a 20 year old having doubts about life and adulthood? Absolutely. I can't form proper sentences right now due to lack of sleep but just wanted to say thank you for making it. I honestly feel lighter and I feel like it changed my views on future to be more optimistic... I can't wait to replay it! Thanks again!

I love how Our Life turned out!! I keep replaying it and can't stop squeaking and giggling!! Thank You for creating it ♥

okay i have actually fallen in love with cove and cannot WAIT to marry him 😭

Hi! I played through 'Our Life' yesterday and I just wanna say how refreshing it was to be able to have Cove be 'high initiative' and also have so many opportunities to initiate affection from the player character! As a pretty flirtatious/affectionate person myself, I notice that a lot of VNs don't give players that agency, and affection can be kinda 'carrot on a stick' if that makes sense. You guys did an awesome job! I look forward to seeing if there are more of those moments in Step 3 & 4 :)

I have to say I was pleasantly surprised by the option to choose Cove's level of initiative in step 3! As much I love the option to choose I personally enjoy have the romanced character take the lead without my input so when I got to step 3 and had to option to make it so that Cove initiated affection without as much input from me I was really happy! You guys seriously added so much freedom in terms of choices, it's almost baffling that the only thing you have to pay for is optional DLC!

I absolutely loved everything about the game and I really want congratulate the team for making the game such a satisfying experience.

I look forward to step 4

❤️❤️❤️❤️

* and sorry for my bad English

Just finished my first play through and I loved it! I've been looking forward to the game and it definitely was worth the wait. Thank you all for your hard work and can't wait for the extra dlc!

Till then, hope you guys gets some well deserved rest🤗

Love you guys, thank you so much for your hard work. :)

Ok, so I just finished Our Life and, wow. I have never cried at a video game before, ever. Thank you so, so much! Its one of my favorites.

this isn't a question, but i just wanted to say how much i enjoyed our life 🥺 i've been patiently looking forward to the full game for a few months now, and i couldn't be happier with it! i've only played through it once so far but the outcomes of the choices i made were all so soft and wholesome 💗 i can tell that everyone who was involved really worked hard and you all did an incredible job! i can't wait to see what else is in store 👍

i’d just like to say how addictive our life is!!! i constantly played it during quarantine and now playing the full release is so amazing to me!! i love that i’m still discovering dialogue bits with different personalities and actions!!! i have to admit that i’ve been wishing the day to pass faster all day during school so i could go home and play again. mentally i’m not the healthiest and our life being released has boosted it up so much, thank you for creating such an amazing game!!!!!

Hey, I just wanna say I played our life two times and it still give me the same feelings. I was really looking forward to this game before it came out and I kept on replaying the demo. This game is such an amazing experience and I feel so happy playing it. I am not really a person good with words unfortunately but I do honestly love this more than anything in the world. Thank you for making it and I hope that you will continue to make more games like our life. This game really makes me happy and I can't thank you enough

Just wanted to say that Our Life really made me feel seen as an 18 year old trans man who's been struggling with change as of late and I can't thank you guys enough for it. I just finished the main story and currently released DLC's and gosh, I can really only say... woah. Just, woah. The messages are somehow exactly what I needed to hear right now, and they brought me a lot of comfort in this really weird and confusing time in my life. Can't wait to see what comes next in this lovely story <3

I am honestly in love with Our Life. The graphics, the soundtrack its just *chef's kiss* It was so worth the wait for it. I can't wait for step 4. Keep up the good work GB Patch!

good people i have just finished Our Life and let me say, it was beautiful. rarely have such non-fantastical moments (and even some fantastical moments) brought me to tears like this game has, and i don't even have the dlc (yet). i don't know how you did it but it felt like i was playing a slice of life anime. i had waited with baited breath to play this since i played the demo and my expectations were not just met but surpassed. from the bottom of my heart thank you for this game

I found the game by chance and I am so so glad I did. It’s so inclusive and made me feel so incredibly seen. Seeing that my gender identity and sexuality were possible just meant the absolute world to me. I’ve never seen something like this and it just made me so incredibly happy. Thank you for the absolutely amazing game and I can’t wait to see what’s next.

Hello! I downloaded Our life earlier this week and I'm only now getting the chance to play it (Very busy and stressful week) I'm so excited to play and I wanna say thank you for making this adorable game!

I just finished my first playthrough of Our Life and I can't even express how much I love it. Cove is absolutely precious and has killed me several times, and the art and soundtrack is beautiful. I love all the small different choices. I'm very interested in the Derek and Baxter DLCs and the rest, can't wait!!!!!!

thank you for "Our Life Beginnings & Always" it has to be one of the best visual novels i ever have played and i just dont want it to end (i know it will, but damn it! i want to have a wedding night, have children and die of old age with cole! XD) when i play it it always makes me tear up (in a good way) and i am most definetly going to buy all the dlc that you make! thank you for this lovely game and all the work that went into it! (ps: i also loved "lake of voices" )

You guys are incredibly talented and im very proud of you all! You've really outdone yourselves w/ OL and i cant wait to see whats next to come for you all :)

i really love that you can be trans in Our Life! not a lot of games do that so i just wanted to say thank you!

Guuyyss!! I just wanna say! Thank you sm for the headscarf option in the MC creator! I especially loved that little detail where MC quickly slips the headscarf on before greeting Cove, I've never felt so immersed :'D Not that the rest of the game wasn't immersive btw, but since I wear my hijab most of the time that little addition really felt like something I would do! So thank you for that <3

I've been watching "Our Life: Beginnings & Always" development for quite some time, and I gotta say its wild to see it finally release. Its so unique in the way relationships work- even character creation. I've cried multiple times over this game while playing. I can't thank y'all enough for a game with these kind of mechanics, and representation. its rare I get to feel im really playing as myself in games like these. Everyones outdone themselves. this'll certainly be one I keep coming back to.

I've been following the development of Our Life from way back when the first demo dropped and it still blows my mind how many choices and customizations there are (love that update for the MC's bedroom btw!) and the fact that the game remembers them - it really feels like your very own coming of age story! I was so immersed I cried at the end :') Can't believe I experienced this game for free lol. I can't wait for future DLCs and Step 4! Good luck with all your upcoming projects dev team!!

Just wanted to say I love Our Life and I'm thankful it exists. Thank you so much! I love the little world you created and all the people in it. Especially Cove! This game makes me so happy!

Just poping in to say hi and that ilu guys ^^, remember to take care of yourselves!

Hi!! I just wanna thank you for creating such an amazing game. Our Life is one of the few dating sims I’ve found that let’s me be a male mc, it’s really hard to find dating sims that let me be gay. Our Life is my new favorite dating sim to just sit down and playthrough whenever I’m having a bad day so I just wanted to let y’all know how much I appreciate all you’ve done. 🤍

Fan from australia here

Just wanted to reach out and let you know how important this game has been to me. I came across it at a really rough time ( that I’m still going through ) and it’s been one of the things that’s driven me to get up and out of bed sometimes.

This game and cove both hold a very special place in my heart and I can’t wait to see more of him in the DLC and Step 4

Much love ♥️

I know this isnt exactly the main focus of the game, but i really love how we can customise the mc personality wise! This is the first time i've played a game like this where the mc actually does and says exactly what I would do and say in certain situations and its such a breath of fresh air!! It's also so cool how the other characters can pick up on it!!

Cove Holden saved 2020 (my 2020 anyways) I would die for him

Sorry for this being out of the blue, but after playing through Our Life I wanted to thank you for the experience. I don’t know if I’ve ever played a game that has made me cry happy tears TWICE lol. It’s beautiful, scenic, inclusive, and absolutely amazing..have a great rest of 2020 and I honestly cannot wait for the rest of it :,) (ps. The ending song is stuck in my head)

I think you guys might've ruined visual novels for me forever. I'm not sure I'll be able to play another without comparing it to Our Life and I know if I do that I'll be disappointed every time because of how amazing it is. I bought the DLCs before playing the base game it's one of the best impulsive purchases I've ever made

Thank you so much for making our life! It's my favorite visual novel ever and I just can't articulate how much being able to just be honest with my responses instead of going for whatever would make the love interest happy means to me? I reccomended it to evry friend I have that plays visual novels because this is the best one I've ever played!

Just wanted to say that I absolutely adore this game! The childhood friends tropes is my favorite thing and this game delivers! Cove is the sweetest thing, infact all the boys are good boys. Super excited for all upcoming dlcs!

Hi, I just want to thank you for making such an amazing game like Our Life. Tbh, I was following the game’s development for a while, but me and my family moved away from my childhood town just a few days before release, so I really connected to this game. You all did amazing!

hey just wanted to know that i completely loved ol: b&a and it was so good and love cove more than i’ve liked any fictional character, it’s now my comfort media. thank you so much

hi i just wanna say i really enjoyed all of the representation in our life b&a! there were characters with a lot of different body shapes, pic characters, lgbtq+ characters, and you get to choose your own pronouns and sexuality!!! so tysm!!

This isn't a question, I just wanted to say that Our Life is incredible. Ever since I finished it, I've been looking for other visual novels to play so I don't play OL so often that I start memorizing the lines before all the DLC comes out, but I keep coming back to it. It's really one of a kind, I think you all ruined other visual novels for me because I haven't enjoyed another VN like I have this one since I read it ❤.

i think our life b&a is the first game where i felt like cove loved me, not the character i play as which is really nice for someone with kinda low self esteem so THANK YOU

I’ve been playing Our Life practically nonstop since yesterday. I just want everyone who worked on it to know how much the LGBTQ inclusivity means to me. As a closeted trans ace guy in an unsupportive household, I can’t emphasize how much of a comfort this game has been to me. Everything about it is so wholesome and heartfelt. I’m excited to see what other games you make in the future 💙

- A demibiromantic ace transgender man who may or may not have cried over the option to be myself in a game for the first time ever

Csn i just say i really appreciate how you handled MC deciding to use they/them at different stages. Mainly because alot of games don't pay much attention to the body the mc was assigned at birth if they player chooses nonbinary like it does with male/female. And it was just nice to be able to play an mc who just thought gender was kinda 'meh' for them but still felt good about the body they were born with (like myself). I guesd it boils down I'm really appreciative of the hard work it must've taken for you to make all those options possible & still have them matter.

I just wanted to thank you all for Our Life. My mental health hasn't been in a good place recently and it has become my favorite form of escapism/way to cheer up. It's idyllic setting and fantastic characters are such a good way to wind down, I love it. Also, I've been dreading 2021 due to classes starting and general stress, but the DLC and your next project have given me something to actually look forward to :). I'm so excited for them and now I actually have a reason to be happy that it's 2021. Sorry if this message is a bit weird, I just wanted to thank the team for their hard work and for creating something so incredible <3

I've gotta say this is one of the most repayable games I've ever played, if not the most. Usually after i do a playthrough or two of a game i have to wait awhile before playing again otherwise it feels stale. But i haven't had that problem with our life because of the sheer ammount of player agency. Everyone who works on tbe game should feel incredibly proud of themselves because you've created something amazing.

I just wanted to say thank you for Our Life. I'm sure you get this a lot, but it really pulled me out of a mentally tough spot in my life. So thank you.

who needs therapy when you have our life: beginnings and always? haha no but seriously this game is my comfort game, and even though i can’t join your patreon at the moment please know i am always supporting you and i am so excited to see everything you have in store! everyone who works on the games is so so talented

All DLCs have nice content. 😡😡

And I love them all!!💗💗💗💖💖💖💕💕💕

#our life #Our Life Beginnings & Always #ourlifeba #ask #gb patch #gb patch games

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rainbowsky · 3 years

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Final round-up of fan fic asks

I've gotten a few more interesting responses to the fan fic discussion so I'm going to round them all up here. This will be my final post on the topic until/unless there's a dramatic new development, or a particularly notable response I want to highlight. Thanks to everyone who brought their thoughts and experiences to the topic. I hope everyone at least feels heard.

The biggest piece of advice that I would like to offer is for everyone to focus on what they love rather than what they hate. If we all did that, the world would be a better place. Alongside that, I'd like to remind everyone to please support authors whose work you like. It's so important. Give them a kudos, give them a nice comment, recommend their work to others. You never know what kind of grief and harassment they are dealing with to bring you these great stories, and our support means a lot.

This is in reference to previous posts here and here.

Anonymous asked:

With regard to fandom and fan fic issue, my years of experience being part of very large fandoms has led me to believe that big accounts are v important in facilitating and enforcing the general consensus of the whole fandom. Unless there will be big accs who'll remind everyone of being respectful & just not being a dick over other's preferences, nothing will change.

This is also the reason why I think certain solo fandoms have adapted weird and twisted narratives as their general fandom story because no big acc has tried to police them & and say hey pls be rational. Whether we like it or not, in a place where how far voices, ideas, tweets, posts get heard is based on the number of followers you have, big accs will have the power and influence in creating/curating/shifting the narratives.

So, if you want to know why your/our fandom thinks like this in general, look at what big accs are tweeting/posting, look at what ideas & values they follow, look at their preferences or how strongly they react to certain situations. it's taxing and toxic for big accs given the nature of social media these days, but it's also the reality of system, the more followers/audience you have, the more influence you will have.

So to anyone reading this I hope we all practice more restraint and reflection before we post anything. Remember that words, no matter what medium you write it in, will always carry weight.

So true. It is easy - even for myself who spends a fair chunk of time answering people's asks - to forget that people can sometimes be impressionable and what we say can influence people whether that's our intent or not. I get used to thinking of myself as a regular guy just doing my own thing when sometimes my thoughts and words go well beyond where I initially posted them.

I think it's important for us to be careful what we say, and it's equally important to be careful what we take from what other people say. Especially when it comes to big claims. Always get a second, third, fourth opinion and don't be afraid to ask for clarification if something doesn't sit right or sounds confusing.

It's also important to reflect on how our words and actions might affect other people's experience of fandom, and err on the side of 'live and let live' wherever possible. It's great to have our own preferences and to champion them, but we should try to do so in a way that leaves space for other people and perspectives.

The more unique perspectives and the more friendly, open dialog there is, the healthier the community will be as a whole.

There's nothing wrong with encouraging and guiding growth in the particular areas we are interested in, as long as it doesn't step on, oppress or attack those who are peacefully enjoying something different.

Anonymous 2 asked: bjyx fans attacking gdgdbaby for including zsww/lsfy dynamics in an event named bjyx then turning right around and attacking the zsww/lsfy event organizer for excluding bjyx? god, can you hear my facepalm and sigh of resignation and incredulity from over there? im genuinely not surprised that they're trying to drive an entire part of the fandom out by disgusting them (and me) with these immature tactics. i believe what im about to say next will sound quite bait-y and i respect your decision 1/?

should you choose not to post this. but i do know that it is not only me, in fact there are many out there, that is of this opinion. we just dont talk about it on twitter to avoid the potential mess it will bring lol. okay, here goes nothing. (do note that im talking about the majority here, not every single person is like this) so bjyx fans tend to be cishet females whereas zsww/lsfy fans are more diverse in terms of age and gender, and most of them are part of the queer community too 2/?

i would like to clarify that most of these zsww/lsfy fans are not dynamic exclusive (in the sense that they are friendly and interact with all ggdd fans) they just prefer to "identify" themselves as zsww/lsfy fans (on twitter specifically) just to form a distinction from bjyx fans who mostly are dynamic exclusive (as in; they do not consume non-bjyx content, and straightup refuse to interact with non-bjyx fans, often blocking them). as a result, id say that the zsww/lsfy communiy is way more 3/?

mature and respectful (after all, they're mostly queer people talking about a queer ship) whereas many problems in this fandom, such as the homophobia, adamantly insisting on "drawing lines" between dynamics, stem from the bjyx exclusive fans, comprised of cishet females who "may not know better". so, it is of no surprise to me that they're resorting to these immature tactics of calling gg unsavory names, and organizing retaliatory events with controversial topics in an attempt to "purify". 4/4

I trust that you have arrived at that theory through your own experience and observation. I haven't personally spent much time immersed in this stuff so I can't claim to have any real insight or expertise. If you say that's your experience of it, then at the very least that's how you've seen things up to this point.

I just want to say that I think we should always be careful about making assumptions about people's age, gender/gender identity, etc.

There are plenty of good reasons to avoid doing that; because those assumptions could be very wrong, because those assumptions are often laced with ageism, sexism, etc., because those assumptions - even when correct - might not be an accurate basis for the conclusions we draw.

But the primary reason I recommend avoiding those type of assumptions is because anything that enables us to clump a group of people together in our minds like that will tend to make them easier to demonize and dehumanize. They are no longer individuals who are each responsible for their own unique perspectives, they are now 'the X group' who is known for 'A B C series of easily attackable ideas or behaviors'.

If we attribute undesirable traits and behaviors to a group of people we feel opposed to in some way, that makes us feel more righteous and justified in behaving unfairly toward them, dismissing their humanity and warring with them. It's just risky behavior to engage in, even when it's well-intentioned.

There might actually be some truth to what you're saying. It could very well be that most of these people are young, inexperienced, heteronormative, etc. but if that's the case then we should try to use those traits to better understand and empathize rather than to better dismiss and discredit.

Just my two cents on that.

It can be really frustrating dealing with what feels like other people attacking us, trying to oppress us, etc. - especially when there are more of them than there are of us. In my experience the best solutions to that sort of problem are generally the ones that focus on what we are doing and want to do rather than what they are doing that we don't want them to do.

As I am always preaching, we can't control what other people say, do or think. The only thing we have any control over is what we say, do and think (and how we respond to what they say, do and think).

I have found in my experience that the moment I step out of a conflict mindset and instead step into a problem-solving mindset, everything starts to come together. I feel better, my outlook is more positive, I can begin to see solutions and allies rather than problems and enemies, and most of all, I become more focused on what I am doing than what others are doing.

So I would recommend everyone who is invested in resolving these conflicts focus on that. "How can we best showcase and encourage the types of stories we enjoy?" instead of "How can we stop these other people from doing things we dislike?"

Anonymous 3 asked:

Hello again! It’s anon #3 from the fanfic post. I really do appreciate reading your thoughts on various issues like this, so thank you for always taking time to write in depth. As for supporting without going to war, the simplest way has always been to just show appreciation for the creators, hype them up. Kudos are the easiest way on ao3 but comments in addition are great. This goes for all content—art, fics, vids..etc. Creators love to see and read how people react to their content. Sharing is also great, fic recs are very helpful, just be cautious with art and reposting though. Hope this helps a bit!

Thanks so much, Anon. I think this is excellent advice. And it's true that appreciation is great, but helping to expand the audience is also great. Recommending stories, pointing people to the pages/websites of artists we like (as opposed to reposting), sharing our own ideas and approaches, encouraging people to try new things... all of this helps build healthier communities.

And here's another one: WRITE! DRAW! CREATE!

I urge anyone with creative interests or talents to bring their voices to the community because we all can benefit from hearing from you.

Thanks again everyone for sharing your thoughts on this issue. I hope that over time we can all work in positive ways to improve the situation.

I think this subject has been well-covered now so I'm going to retire it for the time being. If anyone still feels they want to discuss it further please feel free to message me privately. Thanks.

#fan fiction #fandom reflections #ask

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unambiguouslybi · 3 years

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Hello! I hope you're doing pleasant today, or tonight- or afternoon- or noon? And Happy Pride!! 🎉🎉🎉

So I'm kinda nervous about talking about this mostly because I feel like I'm disappointing my family again hHHh (I came out to being Bisexual last month and they've just been in denial and it's like it didn't happen-)

But it's just that I was born female and that's okay, but on some days I feel very masculine and want to be addressed and represented as such

My friend suggested that I might be Bigender but I just want to be sure about it, it just feels like I'm switching between masculinity and feminity very often

Hi!

I can relate to you when you say you came out and it's like your family's in denial. When I first came out as bisexual and for a couple years after, a lot of my family and friends acted like it never happened and that I was straight. Then when it came to being bigender, I was even more nervous to come out bc my family went through this big ordeal when my brother came out as trans and I was afraid they'd think I was 'influenced' by him and I felt bad for not being the 'normal one' like they thought I was. But luckily, the more my family gets educated, the more they understand and accept who I am. I do think it's important to have resources you can point to in case someone is ignorant on the subject bc a lot of the times, they just don't understand things properly and if they learn about it, they can be more accepting of it (of course, some people will be anti-LGBT+ no matter what unfortunately).

I can't say for sure whether or not you're bigender as figuring out gender is more personal, but I would say it's definitely plausible! I do feel very similarly to you and identify as a man and a woman.

-Mod Kitt

Below is an answer on another ask from one of our mods about multigenders:

Hello yes anon are you me XD But for serious I recognize some of those gender feelings. Since it sounds like you’re right at the start of your gender journey, I’ll simply provide some definitions in the context of possibly being some flavor of multigender~

Nonbinary: An umbrella term for a gender identity that is not 100% man or 100% woman. Some people just identify as nonbinary as well. Many people see this as a neutral third gender or a lack of gender entirely, but the reality is that there is a wide spectrum of nonbinary identities, including bigender.

Bigender: Identifying as [at least] 2 genders. While man/woman pairing is common (like yours truly) you can also identify as a binary gender + nonbinary gender, or as two nonbinary genders! Sometimes the ratio of gender 1 to gender 2 can shift, or sometimes it’s more like preferring to wear blue one day and green the next.

Genderfluid: Similar to bigender, but distinguished from it by being more, well, fluid! People who choose to identify as genderfluid rather than bigender are more likely to experience a changing, shifting gender as a defining feature rather than something that happens occasionally.

Genderqueer: Like I’ve said before, I see this label used most often by people who know that they’re non-cis in some fashion, but don’t particularly care to put a hard and fast definitive label on it. Or, their gender expression is such that they are “queering” their otherwise cis gender. I’ve seen a few crossdressers and drag performers use genderqueer in this way.

Regarding coming out to your family (or even just getting the chance to process this with them rather than more or less on your own), I’ve seen the suggestion to test the waters and see how they react to the concept of other nonbinary or trans folks (celebrities, friends of yours, people that your family may know, etc) and if that’s favorable then to try coming out to them. If another mod or a follower want to chime in with more specific advice please do! My “coming out” is less in the sense of leaving the closet and more in the sense of just opening the closet door, so I don’t have much experience there!

- Eli

hello hello i wanted to add my 2 cents too

as far as coming out is really theres no right way to do it. coming out as queer was easy because i have family members that are open members of the lgb community but coming out as trans/enby was alot more.... difficult. for me i had to ease them into it slowly over the course of months. i probably could have (and honestly, should have) done it all at once but i had never given myself the chance to fully explore who i was when i first did it so they learned about me as i learned about me.

if you want your family along for the journey i suggest that, telling them that your questioning your gender identity and that your thoughts and feelings are subject to change as you learn (of course in a more natural sounding way x3). if you want to kind of leave them in the dark as you explore alone thats also fine! just be sure to have a friend for support as you explore because otherwise it tends to feel very alienating and very lonely. this friend doesnt have to be in the community (but its very nice if they are!) so long as they love and support you and encourage you in your journey.

and most of all remember you dont have to tell your family anything you dont want too. if it makes you too uncomfortable or you feel too unsafe then you can keep it from them. its your life and you get to pick and choose who gets to see and know which parts of you.

-ky

#ask #answered #bisexual #bigender #nonbinary #multigender #queer #trans #lgbtq

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rorybergstrom · 4 years

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𝑫𝑰𝑫 𝑺𝑶𝑴𝑬𝑩𝑶𝑫𝒀 𝑶𝑹𝑫𝑬𝑹 𝑨 𝑩𝑰𝑺𝑬𝑿𝑼𝑨𝑳 𝑹𝑶𝑳𝑳𝑬𝑹𝑺𝑲𝑨𝑻𝑰𝑵𝑮 𝑺𝒀𝑵𝑻𝑯 𝑳𝑶𝑹𝑫 ???

hello, it’s nora again…. hitting u with another child. a south london-born softboi who deserves tenderness. has a burner phone and doesn’t use social media. does techno dj sets. plays the synth loudly through the night if u live in gorham his room always sounds like a space ship just landed. deals weed around campus on his rollerskates. hates that he can’t get new light up wheels because ana coto made rollerskating cool again. as is tradition, here’s the pinterest board. this intro is recycled?? so if theres mistakes, sue me??? and be sure to like and subscribe for more unboxing content x

application.

『 FIONN WHITEHEAD ❙ DEMI-MALE』 ⟿ looks like RORY BERGSTRÖM is here for HIS JUNIOR year as a MUSIC TECHNOLOGY student. HE is 23 years old & known to be ECCENTRIC, FANATICAL, NITPICKY & DOGMATIC. They’re living in GORHAM, so if you’re there, watch out for them. ⬳ ooc name. age. tz. pronouns.

aesthetics.

bed hair from a permanent state of slumber, calloused fingertips from strumming bass into the early hours and djing into the blacklit night, self-help books thumbed once and thrown beneath your bed, battered copies of choose your own adventure books, spliffs passed half-arsed across rooftops while light pollution obscures low-hanging stars, marxist literature in stacks against your bedroom walls, a burner phone twice-shattered and a stash of replacement sim cards.

tw ocd, anxiety, drugs

half-swedish, half-british. the swedish is on his mother’s side. he’s bilingual but thinks in english. only really speaks swedish around his mother. only child, and kinda put a lot of pressure on himself to be the perfect kid when he was young, but his parents are honestly, quite decent? and just want him to have a nice life, they don’t care if he isn’t successful or rich or anything, they’re honestly rather solid. (wow imagine having nice parents, a first for all my characters, im literally this meme)

grew up in peckham, a suburb of london. growing up, his mum was a model / actress / waitress who later retrained as a speech therapist and his dad worked in her majesty’s service at buckingham palace. his dad wasn’t allowed to tell his family what his job entailed but rory suspects it’s probably very boring and just involves a lot of…. logistics n security.

was bullied a lot at school. [cole sprouse voice] he didn’t fit in and he didn’t want to fit in. unironically wore a trenchcoat to school every day of his life. spent most of his lunchtimes in the library because it was his safe space. as a result he knows…. loads of useless information because 30% of his school years were spent reading anthologies on space and the vikings etc. would be good on a game show. obsessively recorded every episode of university challenge as a child.

middle-class and lowkey quite wealthy but rarely talks about money, one of those well-off people who still wears really old shitty shoes and only spends money if they absolutely have to

virgin who can’t drive

into star wars, not into the big bang theory. feminist. can’t watch horror movies

favourite film is where the wild things are. also loves the florida project. thinks kids are the sweetest thing and can’t wait to be a dad to some. right now is dad to one cat, whose name changes on a daily basis (identity is constantly shifting, duuuuude), but they were originally named ‘wheezer’

rory has been musical for as long as they can remember. first picked up guitar because he thought it would make this girl esther who he was in love with like him, but he just ended up falling in love with music instead.

formulated several different bands as a kid but ultimately had to give it up cos he was quite controlling and got fixated on making a certain sound so it wasn’t really fun for the others. got into electronic music because it was something he could do basically on his own and keep tweaking until he got it perfect

always drumming their fingers or strumming invisible guitar strings. tends to avoid parties bc he has quite has specific tastes when it comes to music and doesn’t like listening to r&b for eight hours while people throw up into plastic cups.

a techno connoisseur. has been making electronic music since he was about twelve.

after his parents divorce, when he was fourteen, rory & his mother moved to run-down suburban neighbourhood, pittsfield, massachussets.

big into photography. he mostly uses a canon 35mm camera, but occasionally uses disposable ones when he wants that more rustic feel.

moving to the states, their photography became more focused on suburban neighborhoods and are often quite dark and cinematic (think gregory crewsden). here are some shots of pittsfield i really like which rory has on his wall [1] [2] [3]

falls in love 12 times a day. never had a girlfriend or boyfriend. gets sweaty when someone cute looks at him. flirting?? what?? would prefer to idealise them from a distance

gender??? hm. doesn’t really know where he fits yet, sometimes he feels like a guy and sometimes they dont feel like anything at all. isn’t really bothered, cos they think it’s a social construct anyway. uses he/they pronouns interchangeably, but feels like ‘he’ is more fitting. won’t necessarily pull anyone up on it cos he knows having an identity that’s constantly…. in flux.. can be annoying for others … and doesn’t want to be a burden even tho it isn’t at all?? rory internalises guilt

everything is socially constructed. mirrors let you move through time. the whole thing’s a metaphor. he thinks he’s got free will but really he’s trapped in a maze. in a system. all he can do is consume. people think it’s a happy game. it’s not a happy game — it’s a fucking nightmare world, and the worst thing is, it’s real and we live in it

has ocd. tries to let it affect his life as little as possible, but obviously it’s incredibly hard to control a compulsive disorder. was teased for it at school when other kids started to notice. he was obsessed with the number five, would wash his hands five times, count stairs i groups of five, he could only use the corridors in one direction and always had to keep his hands busy. it manifests itself in hyper-fixations (trains when he was a child – specifically steam engines – then later he became obsessed with space and the patterns of constellations, and now he’s obsessed with synthesizers) and repetitive behaviours like counting stairs. doesn’t really affect his social life at all, he can jst get a bit locked-on n hyper-focused sometimes.

has insomnia. barely ever sleeps. finds it hard to switch off from work / writing / gaming / whatever’s preoccupying him in that moment. he’s always awake at 5am and quite often sleeps in through classes but still gets really good grades because he’s very good at his course. rarely attends classes. prefers to work independently. doesn’t really trust his tutors are intelligent enough to be teaching him, and is particularly suspicious of the lockwood tutors. a music snob tbh

secretly a small-scale drug dealer, only does weed n some party pills. rollerskates around campus dealing cos they dnt have a car

likes: techno, the webpage cats on synthesizers in space, allen ginsberg, vintage gramophones, floating points, lcd soundsystem, marijuana, soft dogs that let you pet them, late-night strolls talking about the universe, independent films, cigarettes, herbal tea, gallows humour, long showers, brown eyes, tchaikovsky, dr. seuss, constellations, photography, late night jazz, vintage game boys and girls who could rip his still-beating heart out of his chest and use it as an ashtray. dislikes: weddings, funerals, formality, button-up shirts that people actually button-up, bananas, hot coffee, social media, people who watch and play sports, rap music – especially of the misogynistic variety, indie wankers in wire-framed glasses that play ed sheeran songs at open mic nights.

plot ! with ! me ! i’d say all the usual “exes fwb hookups spiel” but rory… is very tender and tame… i feel like a deer in the headlights of love……. so give me

study buddies,

people who are also into techno and are music snobs about it,

people who love all kinds of music,

people who are in bands that maybe rory’s recorded and produced stuff for,

people he actually jams with (he plays bass and synth),

unrequited crushes!!

someone they met at a knitting club in freshman year and have remained friends with despite no longer going to it

people rory knows from open mic nights and gigs

library girlfriends / boyfriends that he stares at longingly while paging through leatherbound volumes

gamers !!! social recluses !!! hermits !!

people he deals weed to on his rollerskates (why r all my characters obsessed with rollerskates)

skaters. rory is really shit at skateboarding. like really shit. help the smol

hm now that rory has !Evolved! ig we can do hook up plots if u want but he’s not tht good at divorcing sex from emotion?? like he hooked up w teddy once n felt hopelessly inlove so..... if u want soft plots b prepared for crippling sadness.......

stay groovy XD XD

#radintro #plot with me cowards #said in a very soft and tender way. whispered. im but a small bug in a gutter.

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gcldveins · 4 years

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hello i’m back with another senior citizen and i am incredibly sorry .. i finished s3 of ozarks n couldn’t help myelf :/// but ANYWAYS this is gabriel taylor, laura’s shitty dad ! uwu

basics

✎⌠jason bateman. cis male. he/him⌡❝ — well, look who’s just arrived ! if it isn’t the one and only gabriel taylor. though, around here they’re known as the fortress. don’t tell ‘em i said this but the fifty-one year old lawyer kinda has a reputation of being cold and enigmatic. but y’know, they can be driven and astute too. typical capricorn. anyways, welcome home and stay safe gabe ! ❞

statistics

full name: gabriel jebediah taylor

nickname(s): gabe, sometimes

date of birth: january 7th, 1970

hometown: misty hollow, connecticut.

gender identity: cis gender

preferred pronouns: he/him

sexual orientation: heterosexual

hogwarts house: slytherin

aesthetic: crisp collars, silver tie pins, the smell of fresh laundry, hollow smiles, always a handshake, never a hug, leather briefcase always on hand, a glass of single malt scotch, perfect posture, the sound of waves softly lapping at the shore, thunderstorms with no rain.

distinguishable characteristics: always Clean

their song from the sigh no more album bc i love this album and it makes me Sad™ : dust bowl dance

background ( emotional, physical abuse tw )

born and raised in misty hollow, gabriel’s family has relatively deep roots within the town. the man comes from old money, with all the law firms he owns having been passed down from generation to generation. his father was a part of this business and his mother, on the other hand, is your typical southern belle, moved here from a small town in texas. she was a corporate lawyer ( it’s how she met gabriel’s father ) but since becoming a mother she really has had no interests in any other occupation other than trophy wife and socialite.

to say that gabriel’s parents were old school would be putting it lightly. basically, both of his parents were deeply religious republicans and were very aware of their image as a family. they were harsh parents, extremely controlling when it came to their children’s lives but at the same time were also really emotionally absent. to this day they still believe that it was all in the name of tough love but obviously it was just emotional abuse.

his father was especially hard on gabriel, he was a strong believer in physical discipline and thought gabriel to be too “soft”. he was always berating him, punishing him for petty offences, and pretty much just fostering your typical environment of toxic masculinity. though he never laid a hand on gabriel’s sister as she was what he called, “a lady” and his “pride and joy.”

but gabriel was a good kid, he was obedient aside from stupid mistakes that kids are bound to make. he was your typical golden boy, a jack of all trades of sorts. not exceptionally good at one thing, but averagely good at a multitude of things. he was a quick learner and dedicated, anything he took a crack at, he eventually excelled in. but all those opportunities he was given as a child; being able to practice multiple instruments, getting extra coaching and tutoring in activities of his choice — definitely gave gabriel a leg up among his peers.

throughout high school, he mostly kept to himself, choosing to focus on his education and after graduating, he went to harvard where he earned a dual degree in business and law and carried on through with law school. the plan was to move to boston where the business’ main office was and work for his father, making his way up until he was ready to inherit it all himself.

ok this is where things get shoddy cause everything from above is part of an old intro so if this doesn’t make sense dont look at me ndfjsndjk but i imagine this is where gabe met his future wife ? i don’t want to set anything in stone for when that role gets picked up but ! gabe’s always been .. well-meaning, for a lack of a better word. like in the beginning he initially wanted to go into criminal law and become a prosecutor before his dad pressured him into staying in corporate. these good intentions were really able to develop during his time away from home, i think. he was able to develop his own opinions and views, different from his parents.

but gabriel’s always lived to serve and aims to please, giving himself to others until there’s nothing left. and he still has this really messed up view of his relationship with his parents, especially his dad. it’s just something he’s never been able to shake. out loud, he would never utter a word against them and in his head, he’s justified his father’s actions, forcing himself to think of it in a way that made it okay because putting his actions under any other sort of light would have felt like he was betraying him.

and while he didn’t have the same dreams and ideologies as his father, gabriel felt as if there was really no choice other than to adapt. it’s what’s been expected of him since he was born. so, he poured himself into his work despite hating every minute of it, his pride preventing him to be the one to drive generations of hard work into the ground. and gabriel was good at it, like really good. and he let himself believe he loved what he did, associating the feelings of success with enjoyment.

and in regards to his own family, i think that things in the beginning were good and almost picturesque, y’know? like the vision of a white-picket-fence type of family. but as the years went on, the more time he spent working with his father and the family business, he subconsciously allowed his father’s habits and tendencies into his own head. He succumbed to his parents’ influences and allowed their ideas of success and vision for his and his family’s future to become his own.

and i think one day gabriel looked in the mirror and straight up did not like what he saw. he’s fully aware of the mistakes he’s made in the past and he feels the heft of those mistakes everyday, but what is he supposed to do now ? it’s too late, he’s too far in. and so gabe did what he does best, he compartmentalized and began distancing himself from the family. spending more time at the office than at home because the farther you are away from people, the less likely you are to hurt them right ?

personality

i’m gonna keep this loose cause i’ve noticed i tend to diverge from them a bit when i actually start playing my muses !

but gabriel is the fakest mf you’ll ever meet. all smiles and formalities, he’s like a goddamn politician i hate it. but i think if he were ever to let this decades long charade fall, everything just falls apart for him, y’know? his emotional sitch is like a house of cards, everything being perfectly curated and placed

he’s incredibly loyal to his family, he’d do anything to protect his family. and like sure, he loves them more than anything, but i think this loyalty comes more so out of duty than love, y’know ?

smart as a whip, always calculating and very cunning. the dude’s a shark in the courtroom and has he done morally questionable things to win a case? probably

idk i think... gabriel as a whole is a moral grey area. i rlly do love him and this version of him is always fun to play but we ! shall see !

#misty.intro #this is long n sad im srry i jsut have a lot of feelings abt my shitty son #:pensive:

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gotatext · 4 years

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hello, it’s swamp witch nora again…. i couldn’t stay away.... hitting u with a tiny baby boy who is also terrible (sometimes). musical softboi who loves karl marx and hates children dying in cobalt mines to make smart phones. as is tradition, here’s the pinterest board, have a peruse. fyi sorry for those of u who have read this intro a thousand times i literally.... can never b bothred to change it n i think thats really sexy of me x

CHARLIE PLUMMER / DEMI-BOY — don’t look now, but is that rory bergström i see? the 23 year old music student is in their junior year and he is a rochester alum. i hear they can be whimsical, impassioned, self-indulgent and nitpicky, so maybe keep that in mind. i bet he / they will make a name for themselves living in griffin street. ( nora. 24. gmt. she/her. )

aesthetics.

tw ocd, anxiety, drugs

middle-class and lowkey quite wealthy but rarely talks about money, one of those well-off people who still wears really old shitty shoes and only spends money if they absolutely have to

virgin who can’t drive

into star wars, not into the big bang theory. feminist. can’t watch horror movies

favourite film is where the wild things are. also loves the florida project. thinks kids are the sweetest thing and can’t wait to be a dad to some

has been musical for as long as they can remember. first picked up guitar because he thought it would make this girl esther who he was in love with like him, but he just ended up falling in love with music instead.

a techno connoisseur. has been making electronic music since he was about twelve.

after his parents divorce, when he was fourteen, rory & his mother moved to run-down suburban neighbourhood, pittsfield, massachussets.

big into photography. he mostly uses a canon 35mm camera, but occasionally uses disposable ones when he wants that more rustic feel.

falls in love 12 times a day. never had a girlfriend or boyfriend. gets sweaty when someone cute looks at him. flirting?? what?? would prefer to idealise them from a distance

gender??? hm. rory don’t really know where they fit yet, sometimes he feels like a guy and sometimes they dont feel like anything at all!! slippin out of his physical form into the spirit realm! isn’t really bothered, cos they think it’s a social construct anyway. uses he/they pronouns interchangeably, but currently feels like ‘he’ is more fitting. won’t necessarily pull anyone up on it cos he knows having an identity that’s constantly…. in flux.. can be annoying for others … and doesn’t want to be a burden even tho it isn’t at all?? rory internalises guilt

occasionally deals weed n pills when strapped for cash, but only 2 ppl he knows, and on a very small scale grass-roots level!! (so its ok???) rollerskates around campus dealing cos they dnt have a car. we love to see it

aesthetics: bed hair from a permanent state of slumber, calloused fingertips from strumming bass into the early hours and drumming into blacklit night, self-help books thumbed once and thrown beneath your bed, watching vine compilations until your eyes turn square, battered copies of choose your own adventure books, spliffs passed half-arsed across rooftops while light pollution obscures low-hanging stars

plot ! with ! me ! i’d say all the usual “exes fwb hookups spiel” but rory… has never hooked up with anyone… i feel like a deer in the headlights of love……. so give me

study buddies,

people who are also into techno and are music snobs about it,

people who love all kinds of music,

people who are in bands that maybe rory’s recorded and produced stuff for,

people he actually jams with (he plays bass and synth),

unrequited crushes!!

actually i think rory had sex w delilah in the last version of this rp so if u want a hook up plot its possible just unlikely. they’d hav 2 be the driving force i reckon cos rory doesn’t really act on impulses like desire or anythin.... jst bottles that shit up !!! but yea we could do a spicy hook up plot maybs, depending on the person

someone they met at a knitting club in freshman year and have remained friends with despite no longer going to it

people rory knows from open mic nights and gigs

library girlfriends / boyfriends that he stares at longingly while paging through leatherbound volumes

gamers !!! social recluses !!! hermits !!

people he deals weed to on his rollerskates (why r all my characters obsessed with rollerskates)

skaters. rory is really shit at skateboarding. like really shit. help the smol

#tw drugs #tw ocd #tw anxiety #HUNTINGTONINTRO

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pbscore · 4 years

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Hello! I dont want to be intrusive, but as a fellow butch who aants to start t, i was wondering how you navigate that. Im feeling kind of lost in terms of gender, and trying to figure out my own identity when im not sure of either my gender or sexuality bc they seem so tied together. Do you have any advice?

Not intrusive at all, anon! I can definitely understand where you’re coming from because that’s how I felt for years before I finally made that decision.

I would say, before trying to even start any hormones or surgeries, try to practice referring to yourself in different ways. For example: ask yourself what pronouns or names you feel the MOST comfortable with from yourself and from others. Do you like she/her, they/them, he/him, etc? Do you like primarily dressing a certain way? For me, it was obvious that I prefer wearing ‘masculine’ clothing with lots of silver jewelry. Due to my observations of that about myself, I embraced being androgynous AND masculine at the same time, rather than ‘choosing’ which one of those labels I am.

I would also say, anon, that’s it’s ok for you to keep exploring your identity and not feel any shame for changing it when you feel it’s time to. If you feel like you connect with the butch label and you are thinking about taking T, there’s nothing wrong with that at all! But, it’s ok if those feelings change into something else along the way, too.

I have noticed that for a lot of lesbians (butch lesbians, specifically), we tend to have a much harder time navigating our gender and sexuality at the same time because they can be linked together. I’m a lesbian because I’m only attracted to women and I’m not a man. It sounds simple enough but the journey to get to that place was very difficult for me because I thought that I couldn’t look too ‘masculine’ for a butch to the point where I end up ‘passing’ as a man.

I realized that people come in all shapes and sizes. I’ve been blessed enough to meet and see plenty of butches, all with different styles, and it made me realize that there’s nothing wrong with how I look (or how I will look in the future). I don’t identify as a man, so therefore I’m not a man. I can be confident in taking T and knowing that all those features associated with cishet men that happen to you while you’re on it (more hair, higher sex drive, deeper voice, etc) are not EXCLUSIVE to cishet men.

So anon, just take your time and don’t rush into anything. I literally just started my journey this year, after years of being unsure until I realized that taking T was something I wanted to do regardless of which label (butch or trans man) I was using at the time. Because it was such a consistent desire for me, I knew it would only be a matter of time before I officially made the decision and embraced my identity as a transmasc nonbinary butch lesbian. It’s a mouthful but it makes me happy, and that’s what matters at the end of the day, anon! 🌻

#asks #anon #long post

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gayadvicefairy · 3 years

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Hello! Sorry if this will sound dumb but, i already identify as an asexual, but recently i started thinking if i really feel like a woman, since i remember (pre-kindergarten) i prefered 'boys' clothing. And i think i dont feel like a woman, but not like a man either. So like, i tried to "imagine" i identify as a, um, human. And instant weird sense of relax and comfort washes over me when i do that, like a pressure in my head going away. I read a lot but i'm still not sure if there is a name for it, but i feel much better (even physically) when i think i'm neither of 'two options'. Is there anything i can do? Maybe you have some good resources? Thank you ❤️

Our relationship with gender is a very personal matter. Nobody gets to tell us how we get to feel about who we are and how we are comfortable in our own bodies.

I, myself, am in a very similar boat when it comes to identity. I bristle at the idea of being either man or woman. I've used the label of genderqueer mostly because I like the term "queer" in general as a non-label. For me, genderqueer means I refuse to give myself any specific label because how I relate to gender at any particular moment is nobody's business.

There are TONS of other labels out there you can explore: nonbinary, gender nonconforming, genderfluid, agender, trans... and the list goes on! You need to find what works for you.

On a personal note, I don't know that I'd find "human", specifically, to be a useful label, but if that works for you I won't be the one to tell you not to use it. You can also just choose NOT to use ANY label and just live your life as you see fit.

As for resources, I think what helped me the most was following people on social media whom I want to emulate and learn from. Also, just meeting people in person (safely, Covid-wise) at events or clubs is also a great place to get started. While there are websites and other resources out there with general information, I've always found that introspection and reflecting those thoughts on trusted friends/family have been the most helpful for me in my journey.

Hope this helps - please feel free to reach out if you want to talk more.

#gender #lgbt #advice #gsm #genderqueer

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baby-dinosaurr · 7 years

Text

i was actually tagged in something ayee

tagged by @small-tap (thanks love! i feel noticed!!)

name: Allison (yes two L’s)

nickname: ally, dumb hoe, stupid bich, baby dinosaurr [online] (all given by my wonderful friends ! love you!)

gender: female

sexual orientation: jungkook

star sign: gemini (trust im not two faced!! #notallgeminis)

height: i think i’m 5 ft,, some say i look 5 yrs old

time right now: 8:21 pm (im supposed to be doing homework hhh)

last thing i googled: jungkook pics (i love my mans)

favorite bands: TWENTY ONE PILOTS, PANIC! AT THE DISCO, BTS, blackpink, seventeen, the strokes, the killers, muse was like my first ever favorite band she’s old,, my music taste basically consists of kpop and alternative/indie rock

song stuck in my head: im not even joking, i had “Suit and Tie” by Justin Timberlake stuck in my head for the past 3 days

favorite solo musicians: dean, jay park, rufus wainwright, childish gambino, miike snow, and some others but i cant think of them at the moment

favorite book: eleanor&park,, i bought that book not really expecting to love it but bIIICCHH

last movie watched: la la land (it was cute)

last tv show i watched: hello my twenties (that kdrama really shook me it was gOODT)

what im wearing right now: makeup, a choker with a ring in the center, a really slouchy gray t-shirt, black jeans, and nikes

when i created my blog: june of last year??

what kind of content i post: as im sure you’re aware, im trash for bts, but i also blog a lot of outfits because my fashion sense is pretty great, i blog A LOT OF MEMES, funny vids, and some aesthetic posts sprinkled in there as well

when did your blog reach its peak: that one time i posted a bts related post a thousand light years ago :,)

any other blogs: i can barely remember to eat, how am i supposed to manage another blo-

do you get asks regularly: “how old are you?? you look 5″

why did you choose your url: one of my best friends would describe me as a baby dinosaur because im wild and crazy, but cute and shy at first, so ever since then, baby dinosaurr has been my identity,, i had to use two R’s because one R was already taken

what made you get a tumblr: i wanted to be hip with the kids

following: 73 ,, i should be more active

current # of followers: 34 with a sprinkle of porn blogs

posts: 2,451

hogwarts house: umm i live in a basement sooo

pokemon team: The Bystanders

favorite colors: primary colors, monochromatic colors, peaches, corals, pinks, green and orange sometimes, mauve, and plum colors

lucky numbers: idk honsestly,, 7? 13?

favorite characters: everyone form merlin, the hamilton cast, bojack horseman, a series of unfortunate events, and just, a lot

average hours of sleep: hA.

how many blankets do you sleep with: literally 5, the bich is cOLD

dream job: forensic anthropologist (nERD)

dream trip: new york, paris, tokyo, korea, just anywhere honestly i love traveling

a fact about me: i’m so lovesick, literally i get so emotional over the smallest things sometimes like, don’t wanna sound needy or anything but having a significant other sounds nice

i tAG: @erynnator, @nunofthat, @jjks, @guy, @liliest, @starscience, @cloudwalkr, @minni-seok, @anyopoop, @gugudan and any others who would like to do it! if you dont wanna, its okay, you do you

#this was nice #personal

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fangirlfiles1 · 6 years

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Um hello! I'm confused about anything and everything In my life. May I ask you some advice on an issue? You dont need to answer if you don't know or want to its just. At this point I've asked tons of people and I'm still confused? Okay so I'm thinking back and i feel like a lot of times I'm genderless? So I'm thinking I may be agender, nonbinary or demigirl? Bc I do love being feminine and a girl sometimes but the rest of the time I dont really feel a gender at all? Thank you for you time

This has taken me FAR too long to respond to. I’m so sorry about that! I try to respond to asks like this on my laptop so that I can type out my answers properly, however my laptop is horrible (I’m getting a new one so this will change soon) so I don’t go on it much. Anyway!

Unfortunately I can’t just look at this message and magically reveal your identity to you, as much as I wish that I could. The truth is, I can hardly do that for myself! I’m not entirely sure who I am either. You’ve probably heard this from every person that you’ve asked, but the only person who can truly know that is yourself. Only you can see everything about you combined and put it together to come up with the label that suits you best. I do have a little bit of advice based on my own experiences though, so I hope that this helps.

Don’t be afraid to pick a label and try it out for a while. Even if you don’t feel like it 100% suits you, testing things and seeing how they feel really is one of the best ways for you to learn what you feel fits or doesn’t. It allows you to see what you like and what you don’t, so that you can either choose a label that seems more accurate and try that, or settle with the one that you’ve chosen. I personally jumped from cis female to nonbinary and have chilled there for a while, but I’ve also been questioning about being gender fluid, a demi boy, or even just a straight up trans guy. I’m still not sure who I am, but I’ve been testing out seeing myself as trans. Even though I really only keep that in my head right now, it has been really helpful for me to see what I like about it and what I don’t. Basically just don’t be afraid to try things! I know that it can be really stressful sometimes with so many different labels with different meanings to choose from but at the end of the day you just have to find what feels most comfortable to you. Remember that you are constantly changing and growing so even if your labels change in the future, that’s alright! And it doesn’t invalidate the identity that you see yourself as currently. You don’t have to go from what you currently identify as and then choose your be all end all pronouns and such as if you can’t change it again. You are a customize-able character every day of your life, friend.

I would be more than happy to talk to you more about this subject, though your best bet would probably be to message me if you don’t mind coming off anon. I’m slow at answering asks, as you can see. Just remember that you don’t have to fit into the perfect amount of feminine to choose a more feminine label, and you don’t have to be one hundred percent genderless to choose one like that. If that makes any sense. I hope that this was at least somewhat helpful, and I truly wish you luck! I know that this can be a very complicated and scary journey and though I’m not sure who you are, I am very proud of you for taking the time to truly figure yourself out. It’s a life long process but a very valuable one!

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rorybergstrom · 5 years

Text

hello, it’s swamp witch nora again…. hitting u with a tiny baby boy who is also terrible (sometimes). musical softboi who loves karl marx and hates children dying in cobalt mines to make smart phones. as is tradition, here’s the pinterest board, have a peruse x

「 timothee chalamet. cismale. 」have you seen rory bergström around yet? i hear he’s decided to be in AUDAX for their JUNIOR year as a MUSIC TECHNOLOGY major. the 23 year old SHEEP is known to be fanatical, eccentric, nitpicky and dogmatic. ➨ the muse is written by nora, she/her, 23, gmt.

aesthetics.

tw ocd, anxiety, drugs

half-swedish, half-british. the swedish is on his mother’s side. he’s bilingual but thinks in english. only really speaks swedish around his mother. only child, and kinda put a lot of pressure on himself to be the Perfect Kid when he was young, but his parents are honestly, quite decent? and just want him to have a nice life, they don’t care if he isn’t successful or rich or anything, they’re honestly rather solid. (wow imagine having Nice Parents, a first for all my characters, im literally this meme)

was bullied a lot at school. [cole sprouse voice] he didn’t fIT iN AND HE DIDN’T wANT TO fIT iN. unironically wore a trenchcoat to school every day of his life. spent most of his lunchtimes in the library because it was his Safe Space. as a result he knows…. loads of useless information because 30% of his school years were spent reading anthologies on space and the vikings etc. would be good on a game show. obsessively recorded every episode of university challenge as a child.

middle-class and lowkey quite wealthy but rarely talks about money, one of those well-off people who still wears really old shitty shoes and only spends money if they absolutely have to

virgin who can’t drive

into star wars, not into the big bang theory. feminist. can’t watch horror movies

favourite film is where the wild things are. also loves the florida project. thinks kids are the sweetest thing and can’t wait to be a dad to some

a techno connoisseur. has been making electronic music since he was about twelve.

after his parents divorce, when he was fourteen, rory & his mother moved to run-down suburban neighbourhood, pittsfield, massachussets.

big into photography. he mostly uses a canon 35mm camera, but occasionally uses disposable ones when he wants that more rustic feel.

falls in love 12 times a day. never had a girlfriend or boyfriend. gets sweaty when someone cute looks at him. flirting?? what?? would prefer to idealise them from a distance

gender??? hm. doesn’t really know where he fits yet, sometimes he feels like a guy and sometimes they dont feel like anything at all. isn’t really bothered, cos they think it’s a social construct anyway. uses he/they pronouns interchangeably, but feels like ‘he’ is more fitting. won’t necessarily pull anyone up on it cos he knows having an identity that’s constantly…. in flux.. can be annoying for others … and doesn’t want to be a burden EVEN THO it isn’t at all?? rory internalises guilt

secretly a small-scale drug dealer, only does weed n some party pills. rollerskates around campus dealing cos they dnt have a car

long haired, aesthetic is like… timmy in lady bird n beautiful boy

plot ! with ! me ! i’d say all the usual “exes fwb hookups spiel” but rory… has never hooked up with anyone… i feel like a deer in the headlights of love……. so give me

study buddies,

people who are also into techno and are music snobs about it,

people who love all kinds of music,

people who are in bands that maybe rory’s recorded and produced stuff for,

people he actually jams with (he plays bass and synth),

unrequited crushes!!

someone they met at a knitting club in freshman year and have remained friends with despite no longer going to it

people rory knows from open mic nights and gigs

library girlfriends / boyfriends that he stares at longingly while paging through leatherbound volumes

gamers !!! social recluses !!! hermits !!

people he deals weed to on his rollerskates (why r all my characters obsessed with rollerskates)

skaters. rory is really shit at skateboarding. like really shit. help the smol

#message me u cowards x #wshedintro #i feel like som of this..... will hav changed since i wrote this intro..... but..... i walk on the wild side

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