#-be in Even More Pain!

[fraye-complex]

Heating pad died

Again

#why #what the fuck did I do #I don't think I've even had it a month #it's the second one like this (first one died and was returned for this one) #like i guess maybe near constant use might do it #but I'm in constant fucking pain #so like #I'm using my tools to alleviate that #heating pads should not be a fucking disposable product #heating pad #chronic pain #chronic illness #fibromyalgia #muscle pain #organ pain #fucking ouch #love having stress based pain so i can be stressed about being in pain then be in pain THEN be more stressed about being in pain so i can- #-be in Even More Pain! #i wish they were easier to self maintenance

[noknowshame]

why is religious Christmas imagery all so joyful and pleasant? where is the inherent horror of the birth of Christ? A mother is handed her newborn child, wailing and innocent. Her hands come away sticky. Red. Simply by giving her son life she has already killed him. He is doomed from the beginning. Her love will not save him from suffering. Because the thing cradled in her arms is not a baby, it is a sacrifice: born amongst the other bleating animals whose blood will one day be spilled in the name of what demands it. the night is silent with anticipation. Mary, did you know? That your womb was also a grave?

#instant conversation enders for my multiple youth pastor cousins #don’t say it (I’m gonna say it) #The Child is The Price #but i mean come on #as someone who isn't actually even christian the real-life historical version of this is still cursed as fuck #i mean we know that jesus was a person who existed. whatever circumstances he was born in #its terrifyingly ominous to imagine being so unaware of the affect your child will have on the future of humanity #time itself will one day be counted around your birth of him #and all because he will suffer an excruciatingly painful death that you will not be able to prevent #not only that. but regardless of his or your intentions #regardless of whether there is a god #for millenea unfathomable millions will have blood spilled and will spill blood in his name #atrocities will be committed that you cannot even conceive of #and all on his and your behalf #you love your child. its beautiful. but there's horror in what you've done. because everyone else will love him too #and what's more dangerous than that?

[inkskinned]

the thing is that they're so fascinated by sex, they love sex, they can't imagine a world without sex - they need sex to sell things, they need sex to be part of their personality, they need sex to prove their power - but they hate sex. they are disgusted by it.

sex is the only thing that holds their attention, and it is also the thing that can never be discussed directly.

you can't tell a child the normal names for parts of their body, that's sexual in nature, because the body isn't a body, it's a vessel of sex. it doesn't matter that it's been proven in studies (over and over) that kids need to know the names of their genitals; that they internalize sexual shame at a very young age and know it's 'dirty' to have a body; that it overwhelmingly protects children for them to have the correct words to communicate with. what matters is that they're sexual organs. what matters is that it freaks them out to think about kids having body parts - which only exist in the context of sex.

it's gross to talk about a period or how to check for cancer in a testicle or breast. that is nasty, illicit. there will be no pain meds for harsh medical procedures, just because they feature a cervix.

but they will put out an ad of you scantily-clad. you will sell their cars for them, because you have abs, a body. you will drip sex. you will ooze it, like a goo. like you were put on this planet to secrete wealth into their open palms.

they will hit you with that same palm. it will be disgusting that you like leather or leashes, but they will put their movie characters in leather and latex. it will be wrong of you to want sexual freedom, but they will mark their success in the number of people they bed.

they will crow that it's inappropriate for children so there will be no lessons on how to properly apply a condom, even to teens. it's teaching them the wrong things. no lessons on the diversity of sexual organ growth, none on how to obtain consent properly, none on how to recognize when you feel unsafe in your body. if you are a teenager, you have probably already been sexualized at some point in your life. you will have seen someone also-your-age who is splashed across a tv screen or a magazine or married to someone three times your age. you will watch people pull their hair into pigtails so they look like you. so that they can be sexy because of youth. one of the most common pornography searches involves newly-18 young women. girls. the words "barely legal," a hiss of glass sand over your skin.

barely legal. there are bills in place that will not allow people to feel safe in their own bodies. there are people working so hard to punish any person for having sex in a way that isn't god-fearing and submissive. heteronormative. the sex has to be at their feet, on your knees, your eyes wet. when was the first time you saw another person crying in pornography and thought - okay but for real. she looks super unhappy. later, when you are unhappy, you will close your eyes and ignore the feeling and act the role you have been taught to keep playing. they will punish the sex workers, remove the places they can practice their trade safely. they will then make casual jokes about how they sexually harass their nanny.

and they love sex but they hate that you're having sex. you need to have their ornamental, perfunctory, dispassionate sex. so you can't kiss your girlfriend in the bible belt because it is gross to have sex with someone of the same gender. so you can't get your tubes tied in new england because you might change your mind. so you can't admit you were sexually assaulted because real men don't get hurt, you should be grateful. you cannot handle your own body, you cannot handle the risks involved, let other people decide that for you. you aren't ready yet.

but they need you to have sex because you need to have kids. at 15, you are old enough to parent. you are not old enough to hear the word fuck too many times on television.

they are horrified by sex and they never stop talking about it, thinking about it, making everything unnecessarily preverted. the saying - a thief thinks everyone steals. they stand up at their podiums and they look out at the crowd and they sign a bill into place that makes sexwork even more unsafe and they stand up and smile and sign a bill that makes gender-affirming care illegal and they get up and they shrug their shoulders and write don't say gay and they get up, and they make the world about sex, but this horrible, plastic vision of it that they have. this wretched, emotionless thing that holds so much weight it's staggering. they put their whole spine behind it and they push and they say it's normal!

this horrible world they live in. disgusted and also obsessed.

#this shifts gender so much bc it actually affects everyone #yes it's a gendered phenomenon. i have written a LOT about how different genders experience it. that's for a different post. #writeblr #ps my comments about seeing someone cry -- this is not to shame any person #and on this blog we support workers. #at the same time it's a really hard experience to see someone that looks like you. clearly in agony. and have them forced to keep going. #when you're young it doesn't necessarily look like acting. it looks scary. and that's what this is about - the fact that teens #have likely already been exposed to that definition of things. because the internet exists #and without the context of healthy education. THAT is the image burned into their minds about what it looks like. #it's also just one of those personal nuanced biases - #at 19 i thought it was normal to be in pain. to cry. to not-like-it. that it should be perfunctory. #it was what i had seen. #and it didn't help that my religious upbringing was like . 'yeah that's what you get for premarital. but also for the reference #we do think you should never actually enjoy it lol' #so like the point im making is that ppl get exposed to that stuff without the context of something more tender #and assume .... 'oh. so it's fine i am not enjoying myself'. and i know they do because I DID. #he was my first boyfriend. how was i supposed to know any different #i didn't even have the mental wherewithal to realize im a lesbian . like THAT used to suffering.

[pineapple-frenzy]

Book 2 au: sparring sessions and short hair katara

They like to have sparring sessions in order to keep their bending skills sharp. They allow themselves to go all out and not hold back at all cause they know if anyone got hurt, Katara could just heal them

But anyways, wouldn't it be kinda funny if Zuko accidentally burned Katara's hair tho? Aofkqldkkajfjd

The "I think we can save the hairloops" line is from @linnoya-writes thank you for that!! :>>

#zutara #zuko #katara #atla #book 2 au #my art #i mentioned in my last book 2 au post that i wanted to include short hair katara into it and y'all were so supportive of it!! 😭😭😭 #so this is how i think it would go #it would happen as katara is trying to evade one of zuko's fire balls #she manages to avoid it but since her hair is long it still caught on fire #she'd be pissed so she water whips the hell out of zuko #and then promptly forgets about it akfhkakdkakdj #even after the sparring session she still hasn't remembered cause 'oh no zuko's in pain i have to help him!' #it isn't until zuko even mentions it that she remembers #zuko thinks she's more calm than i thought she would be after burning her hair so he mentions it to her #little did he know katara just forgor aldjlakdkaljd #n e ways zuko does feel bad so she offers to help fix it up for her #i think after the haircut katara would find herself looking in mirrors when there are any around cause 'zuko thinks i'm beautiful?? really? #zuko doesn't know this tho and he thinks katara is till sad about the unwanted haircut so he keeps telling her that she looks beautiful #and katara just keeps losing it aldjlakdlald #in conclusion they are idiots your honor

[lilybug-02]

Pain is a great motivator…

Part 26 || First || Previous || Next

—Full Series—

Meanwhile Toriel:

(Loud noises don't wake her up usually.)

Artist note: I’m so proud of this :))) I know it’s a lot of dialogue and reading, but dialogue is grueling work for me. I’m glad with the art and for the amount of pages I made in such a relatively short time span -w- page 5 was super fun to work on. A lot of blood, sweat, and hours here... :) The backgrounds were a big bore tbh, but I finished them! Yippie!

#CHARA WTF DO YOU MEAN “COMPUTER”???? #lol i hope you guys dont hate me for what im doing in the next update. #IS THAT A MAC OS??? #Yes......owo'' #Kris and the Gang are LITTLE now. I've pixelated them and turned them into little game characters! #FINALLY!! #I never thought I would be going so far in the story to explain WHY Kris pulls out their SOUL and opens Darkfountains even when they killed #Berdly in Chapter 2. Pain can make people do horrible things. #Uhhhhhhhhh anyways. :3 I hope you liked it! I made this post a little too long for my liking and didnt get it out when i wanted too- #but thats okay! As long as people enjoy it :) #bread #art #deltarune chara timeline #deltarune chara timeline comic #seriously though #long post #man am I glad I switched over to the limited color palet! It helps me feel alot more relaxed uwu #This is....way over 16 hours of work q-q #chara #asriel #susie #kris #asriel dreemurr #kris dreemurr #kris deltarune #susie deltarune #deltarune #comic #my art

[bunabi]

'art idea that's above your skill set' and 'writing idea that's above your skill set' are tortures I wish upon absolutely no one man

#nerfed by god forsaken by fate etc pain dude #its not impossible even like it just takes time #which just so happens to be the one resource that constantly shrinks and that you cant create more of

[crybaby-bkg]

I think Deku has a bit of a mean streak, actually. he’s no Bakugou—that’s for sure—but he’s not this innocent, sweet angel baby that the media has painted him out to be. but you only catch it when you least expect it, when you’re pushing his nerves, when the stakes to everything around him are high, when he’s tired of endless sleepless nights and just—snaps.

“Oh?” you go, grin unfurling like some grinch, chin resting on your hands as you leer at him from across his expansive desk. “You’re mean.” your words are teasing, a snarl that curls your mouth up. Deku stutters, eyes going wide, jaw snapping shut in surprise as he tries to think back on how rude he just sounded.

“No, I’m not—I mean, you wouldn’t stop and I just—there’s a lot on my plate right now—and you just—you keep on—I’m not—I’m not mean.” He’s sputtering, hands all over the place, the glasses perched on the bridge of his nose falling even lower with how he jabbers on and on. it’s endearing really, to see how he tries to upkeep his image of being so kind and understanding, even though his nostrils just flared at you. and his eyebrows turned down and he gritted at you, his hands were balled into fists, his words were so nasty, so ugly, so unbecoming for Deku.

you liked it. loved it even—vowed to get him like this every single fucking second that you could.

you pick and poke at him whenever you see him, teasing him and pulling at him. pushing him around even though the hero is so much stronger than you, so much bigger. and he lets you, tries to defend himself but—that’s not what you want. you want the ugliness, the snark, the mean.

he snaps, eventually, when you least expect it. grabs you up in black whip when you go to push him against the wall for the third time in only a minute, his eyes suddenly dark, the aura of the room suddenly charged.

“That’s what I was looking for.” you whisper to him, the grin spreading your face quickly dissipating in only seconds when you become the prey. when you become the one pushed up against the wall with teeth at your neck, a hand in your underwear, bullying your hole with too thick fingers.

“Why do you want me to act like this? Be so mean to you, huh?” he sounds so frustrated with himself, with you, growling and nipping and licking when you don’t answer quick enough. but your breath is caught in your lungs because finally—finally, did you get what you wanted. it just took a little bit of pushing, you suppose.

#omg I wrote this idea down last night and couldn’t even type it up #bc I took some sleep meds and it put me out SO FUCKING QUICK???? #usually I don’t lay down until like an hour and a half or two #but it was literally like 40 mins and I was DONE!!!! #but I finally wrote it :D #there’s also been so much talk of him on the dash and i am. very much so liking this #I miss him bc I don’t think about him enough #but I also think he can be. so mean. like NASTY mean when his limits are pushed enough #ohhhh my god I wont him so bad #okay gn I took more meds bc my pelvis has been in so much pain???? #just the right side too??? omg AM I DYING GELP #—new treat in the streets! 🍫 #deku treats! 🍬

[azrielfiend]

artificer and spearmaster for a huge rw project im working on

#my art #rain world #rain world downpour #rainworld #rw artificer #rw spearmaster #time to draw like 5 more of them #aesprite is FUN okay #im enjoying this even though artificer was a pain in the ass to animate #hs!slugcats #aesprite

[thedisablednaturalist]

I think when people think of mental illness and what helps, especially with things like anxiety and depression, the treatment involves pushing yourself. Pushing yourself to get out of bed, to exercise, to take a shower, to go out in public, to order your own food from the cashier, etc.

And because the mental health movement has grown so much, people think that's the default of ALL illnesses. That the only way someone will get better is if they push themselves. That practice makes perfect. That you'll become more comfortable or strong over time the more you do something.

But what people need to realize is, with physical disabilities and chronic illnesses, pushing yourself in most cases is DETRIMENTAL. Pushing yourself past your limits can lead to flare ups or further injury. That's why it's important to know your limits, how certain activities may affect your condition, and learn how to either adapt or get help to complete the activity in question.

Also, most of us are already pushing ourselves. Most of us don't have access to the help or equipment we need. Most of us live in places where we frequently encounter inaccessible obstacles. Most of us NEED to rest.

So please don't try to be our physical therapists or doctors. There are people specifically trained to help us navigate our own conditions and limitations. There are people trained to help us strengthen our body's resilience without causing flare-ups or injury. Do not tell us "it'll be good for you" or "you need the exercise" when we say something is too heavy or too far or when we say we need our mobility aid(s). Your friend with depression may need to be encouraged to get out of bed, but your friend with chronic illness definitely doesn't.

Respect our rest.

#wrenfea.exe #DISCLAIMER: dont take this as me saying you should be pushing your mentally ill friends #this is more about how physical conditions often differ in how they are treated #also dont like. force your friends or anyone with anxiety to do things they dont want to #thats what therapists are for #also most mental illnesses require medication alongside therapy before they can get better #but even chronic illnesses and disabilities that benefit from exercise still require knowing your limits #and not being pressured to push past them #ive noticed some professionals who help both mentally and physically ill patients tend towards the push method #like my therapist and sometimes my counselors fall back on that method #and i have to remind them i am already pushing myself #and i need to adapt rather than push forward #chronic disability #chronic pain #spoonie #disability #chronic illness #cripple punk #cripplepunk #cpunk

[shadowednavi]

it's been awhile since I've worked on this project! I've had this verse finished for months but didn't want to post it on its own, and instead wait until the whole thing is strung together to show the final result all at once. But I'm tired of holding onto it, so here is one section of my deltarune animation! My art tag has other clips if anyone is interested in seeing more~

(song: "The Hymn of Axciom" by Vienna Teng)

#deltarune #deltarune animation #deltarune spoilers #deltarune chapter 2 #noelle holiday #queen deltarune #kris deltarune #kris dreemurr #susie deltarune #ralsei #berdly #vienna teng #confession time the only reason I haven't been working on this is because I started playing minecraft #and anytime I open my computer it's minecraft time #I did also get a new computer in August which was a pain in the ass to set up #but I managed to get all my clip studio settings transferred over from my old battlestation #this has also been a weird transition year so once I'm fully established in my new place I'll be less stressed #didn't even realize how stressed it's made me #just one more week #oh god it's my art

[morganbritton132]

Fan: *trying to film Corroded Coffin carrying their equipment in to a local show for their CC blog*

Steve: *trying to help by carrying Eddie’s guitar*

Eddie: Wow, that looks heavy. Need help? *grabs hold of Steve’s free hand and interlocks their fingers* Better?

#Eddie ‘Chronic Pain’ Munson is actually banned from helping them lug their equipment around so Steve fills in #Eddie remains helpful by aggressively holding Steve’s hand #Steve’s the only one that he trusts with his sweetheart even if Steve fumes with jealousy every time Eddie calls his guitar sweetheart #I’ve been gone for a hot second. I think I’m going to be more sporadic with this series from now on #eddie munson tiktok saga #eddie munson #steve harrington

[tubbytarchia]

wild hair centaur gf troubles (Gem can't be tamed and neither can her hair)

#sorry Im too obsessed with animal Gem. Wild creature. Free spirit. Untameable thing. Will kill you if you try #whaaagh its even more difficult for me to draw humans traditionally no matter how much I sketch. Pain #whatever. woe gempearl upon ye #shiny duo #gempearl #trafficshipping #tubby art

[aroaceleovaldez]

we should make Nico more fucked up, actually. enough woobifying him. that boy should be covered in blood and viscera

#pjo #riordanverse #nico di angelo #we've done ''nico ships where his partner coddles and takes care of him while he heals from the innumerable trauma'' #now let's do more ''nico ships where his partner helps him move past his trauma and enables him to be gay do crime'' #more nico ships where nico is having his big 3 kid force-of-nature moments and his boyfriend goes ''HOT'' #whatever happened to ''Will and Nico's first date was killing a man together. also Michael was there'' #even stuff like. [tsats spoilers] getting all your negative attributes physically ripped out of you and turned into immortal creatures #that perhaps could leave you Changed! give me Nico who had the darkness taken from him #and it leaves him just a little unsettlingly bright and empty like a partial husk of himself #give me Nico whose cacodaemons can reabsorb back into him like he's their walking nest to hide in and emerge from whenever they please #he's just left an unsettling host for shadow monsters of pain and trauma #that's just one avenue. Nico's the spooky guy let him be spooky! #im constantly rotating just normal Nico operating on underworld laws/logic/mortality in my brain #make him WEIRDER

[the-witchhunter]

DP x DC Camp

The Batfam force Damian to go to summer camp to socialize with kids his own age and have some normal childhood experiences

That’s all well and good, but normal does not describe his cabin’s councilor, one Daniel “for the love of Ancients call me Danny” Fenton

Between the son of the bat and a Fenton, camp is going to be weird

#danny phantom #dp x dc #dp x dc crossover #dp x dc prompt #danny fenton #dpxdc #writing prompt #writing #detective comics #camp counselor Danny #putting on the pep and trying to manage a group of 13 year olds #or ten #dealers choice DC timeline is a pain to deal with #Damian has gone from 10-14 I think? meanwhile Tim is still 17 #and yes I know Danny went to space camp #but to be fair a more traditional camp experience would probably be more story convenient #and he’s been camping #with his family #that’s not even counting his mom going full marine in enemy territory survivalist mode #Danny is going to have some weirdly specific camping skills is what I’m saying

[zillychu]

Consider this: ghosts are actually exactly what the Fentons think they are.

They're snapshots of a longing so strong, unfinished business so deep it reaches out beyond life. Lingers just a bit longer. And if it happens to meet a dense cloud of ectoplasm (invisible to the naked eye, but omnipresent even in the mortal realm), it coalesces. The ectoplasm fits into the shape of it. Which, when the desire is strong enough, it's got a rough idea of its self-image. This tends to mean a more humanoid figure, though it's more often warped in some way–a self-reflection, skewed by said desire. The warping varies on the dead soul’s perception of themselves, the intensity of their desire, how much time passed after death, and how much ectoplasm was present.

In short… no matter how “normal" a ghost looks or acts, it really, truly isn't human. It's animated ectoplasm with a single goal: an obsession. Nothing else. They're more akin to plants than animals, following a single drive with no emotion. They react to stimuli, recognize threats (including other ghosts), and can even imitate human speech and mannerisms to obtain fulfillment of their obsession.

Not “evil" by any stretch, but they're entirely driven by instinct. A tree doesn't pause to consider the rocks it breaks with its roots. A cordyceps doesn't torture its host for fun, or kill with malice. It just does. It follows code in its DNA to survive and multiply–And ghosts just follow the code in its ectoplasm to fulfill its obsession. The more powerful a ghost, the better it's able to overcome obstacles preventing this–whether through brute force, or manipulation. This power is always directly proportional to the amount of ectoplasm present at the time of formation, and how much time passed since death.

What then, does this mean for Danny? Danny, who's previously come to the conclusion that he's only half-ghost, which surely explains how he retained his mind? His independent thoughts and emotions?

What does this mean for Phantom, who experienced an entire world’s worth of ectoplasm condensed as a singularity, at the exact time of his death? Whose strength only grows and begins to exceed every limit they previously thought possible?

If a ghost was as strong as him… could it mimic a human perfectly? Down to a molecular level?

Could it, in its desire to fill an obsession… trick its own fake mind into thinking it was still human? Or half-ghost?

#Danny Phantom #zilly squeaks #it's the greyed out morality for me dude #on one hand it shows how dangerous ghosts are. how you can't reason with them. how they aren't *people* #and yet. you can still find ways to work with them. there's reason to show them mercy when possible #even if it's not really 'pain' it still cries out and bleeds when struck #i just love this kind of angle where there's a solid reason to find co-existence but also like #knowing full well these creatures are more or less. potentially deadly trees. do u feel me #when does sentience bloom from code? #what caused our ancestors to become sapient? #Danny getting Real Fucked Up about possibly being a full ghost who's just really good at pretending to be human #when really... does it even matter? #(for double the pain: add headcanon that ghosts feed off of human life for additional power)

[arealtrashact]

Lisbeth and her bag of tricks...

#lisbeth salander #the girl with the dragon tattoo #my art #once every few weeks I remember that the Fincher film will never get a sequel and I proceed to break every piece of furniture in my house #The Girl Who Played with Fire was / is my favorite book in the trilogy so it's even more painful #all...I wanted...was to see Niedermann hallucinate dragon Lisbeth....eating Zalenchenko's corpse.... #among other things that take place in the book but mostly That.