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strwbrrymlkjh · 8 months

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alhaitham x gn!reader

entering a romantic relationship with alhaitham the scribe was one thing but expecting, hoping, to maintain that kind of relationship with alhaitham the acting grand sage was another. or alhaitham asks for another chance.

!!!: texts in italics are flashbacks. POV changes. angst, neglected reader, lack of communication, mention of alcohol consumption, inaccurate lore, i have no idea what alhaitham does as the acting grand sage, maybe ooc, open-ended, not proofread

wc: 2.2k

AO3

An unmistakable mop of silver hair greets you as you make your way through the hallway of your tenement. Sensing your presence, the figure turned his head to your direction and locked eyes with you. The intensity behind those familiar green eyes instantly rooted you to your spot. One look at his face was enough to bring back the painful memories you tried so hard to bury for the past month.

Entering a romantic relationship with Alhaitham the Scribe was one thing but expecting, hoping, to maintain that kind of relationship with Alhaitham the Acting Grand Sage was another.

Ever since his reluctant acceptance of the position of Acting Grand Sage, you rarely saw your boyfriend at home. In fact, you barely see him at all. You understand that he was preoccupied with rebuilding Sumeru and the Akademiya, yet you cannot help but miss his presence; the slow mornings where he would enjoy the cup of coffee you prepared for him, the peaceful afternoons that you would spend together reading in your living room, the dinners filled with pleasant conversations as you recounted your day. You miss him.

The sound of your front door closing jolted you awake from your nap. Sitting up from your spot on the couch, you greeted your boyfriend who just arrived home.

“Alhaitham. Welcome home.”

“Why are you sleeping on the couch?”

“I was reading, actually. I just closed my eyes for a second, and then dozed off, I guess.” You responded, chuckling weakly.

“I recall telling you not to wait for me.”

“I know, but -” I miss you. You cannot bring yourself to tell him. He was already burdened enough as is, and the last thing you would want to do is to add to his worries.

He sighed and offered his hand for you to take. “Come on, let’s go to bed.”

“Haitham, are you free tomorrow? It’s been a while since we visited the Grand Bazaar."

“I apologize Y/N, but I cannot come with you. I still have to review these research projects in need of funding.” He gestured to the thick bundle of papers that littered his desk.

You offered him a smile. “Alright. We can always do it next weekend.”

“I think I can make it in time for dinner tonight.” Is what he said.

You have no idea how long you sat in your dining room waiting for him. The food you prepared was now sitting cold at the table. Glancing at the clock, you felt a sad smile tug at your lips. Another missed dinner. You let out a heavy sigh as you started clearing away the plates you carefully arranged hours ago.

Alhaitham is a very busy man, and with everything that’s going on in the Akademiya, you knew better than to ask him to do things you used to do together.

At this point, the growing list of broken promises were too many to count.

Soon enough, all the pleasant dinners turned into late night meals eaten alone and the once warm bed became your only witness of the cold nights and the silent mornings you endured on your own.

After what felt like an eternity of staring at each other, he took a cautious step towards you.

“Y/N.”

Pretending you didn’t hear him, you bit the inside of your cheek and fished for your apartment keys inside your bag.

Once again, you hear Alhaitham call out your name.

You are certain that if you bite any harder, you would draw blood, but it was the only way to keep your barely composed façade from cracking.

A warm hand held your wrist as you were about to unlock the door. Startled, you pulled away as if burned. You rubbed the area, a nervous habit.

Even at a distance, you wouldn’t miss how the light left Alhaitham's eyes after seeing your reaction to his touch. The apology was at the tip of your tongue - you did not mean to pull away, you were just surprised, you wanted to tell him.

Your gaze traveled from his crestfallen face to his disheveled hair, sunken cheeks and the out-of-place cape. Looking at him now, you are certain that nobody would be able to tell that the man before you is the intimidating Acting Grand Sage of the Akademiya.

Despite yourself, you wanted to reach out and touch his face, card your fingers through his hair, wipe the tears threatening to spill from his eyes. You clenched your fist at your side to stop yourself.

A month ago, you left your shared apartment with a promise not to get pulled by his gravity again. You feel your resolve falter now that you’re in his orbit.

Green eyes met yours once more and you felt your cheeks heat up. You averted your gaze and headed for your apartment door.

“Wait, Y/N. Please. Can I talk to you? Ten minutes. No. Five. Five minutes is enough. Please, I just need to tell you something.”

You stopped in your tracks. The desperation that laced his voice reminded you of the moments when you had to fight for even a minute of his time.

“It was one date Y/N.” Alhaitham reasons out. “Do not make it a huge deal.”

You turned to him, a look of indignation on your face. “One date? It’s our anniversary Alhaitham. Is it really too much to ask for one dinner with you?” You exclaimed. “I looked like a fool. No, I felt like a fool waiting for you to show up. You did not even think about telling me that you couldn’t make it.”

He pinched the bridge of his nose before turning to you. “I apologize, but you are well aware that I have more pressing matters to attend to at the Akademiya.”

You did not think that your heart could break any further. You have known it for a while now; his duty always comes first.

Alhaitham knew that he did not have the right to be here and his presence was likely to hurt you. It was nothing new, he thought grimly. It seems that that was all he has ever done these past few months - cause you pain.

He unintentionally drove you away and now he was here, consumed by regrets yet filled with determination to do better. That is, if you give him a chance to do so.

It seems the odds are against him as he watches you rub the wrist he touched. It was one of your nervous habits. It could also be that you were trying to erase the lingering feeling of his skin making contact with yours, a voice whispered in his head.

You stood unmoving after he practically pleaded you to hear him out and it was enough to give him a sliver of hope.

He cleared his throat. “Have you been well?”

“You came here to ask me that?” You responded, the disbelief evident in your tone.

“No. I mean -” He closed his eyes tightly, willing his headache to go away. The lack of sleep was getting to him. This was not how he wanted this to go.

Gathering the will to speak again, he continued, “You weren’t answering my letters and I simply wish to know how you have been faring.”

No, these were half-truth, excuses. If he really wanted to earn another chance, he should start with being honest with you, with himself. So, he said, “I am sorry. I wanted to see you. I missed you, Y/N.”

The silence that followed his statement was deafening. He watched you study his face before he heard you ask, “Are you drunk?”

“I did have a couple of glasses at the tavern, yes. But I assure you, I am completely aware of what I am doing at this moment.” He answered honestly. “I am the worst, aren't I? I do not even have the courage to face you sober.” He bowed his head, a weak smile tugged at his lips. “Sorry, I’m just - I really am sorry.”

“Is that the reason why you’re here? To share your newfound drinking habits?” You responded coldly.

“No, I do have my reason.” He raised his head to look at you behind his blurry eyes and the sight took his breath away. “But … were you … were you always this beautiful?” He blurted out before he could stop himself. Though, it was not the alcohol speaking. It was the truth. The sun was setting behind you and it bathed you in its glow, casting a halo around your head.

He felt himself struggle for a silent breath as he took his time taking you in. “You are so beautiful, my love." The term of endearment hangs between the both of you.

You shook your head. “You’re drunk, Alhaitham.”

“I’m not.” He insisted. “I’m not. It’s just … I can’t believe I hurt someone this beautiful so deeply.” And in a quieter voice, as if talking to himself, he whispered, “I’m such a fool.”

He knows he cannot win you back like this; not with flowery words and praises of your beauty. Still, he wanted to tell you that and many other things he was not able to.

Panic welled up inside him as you shook your head and unlocked your door. Chasing after you, he had half the mind to hug you from behind to stop you from leaving. But he knew he shouldn't push his luck right now, if your reaction earlier is anything to go by.

"Y/N, please."

You turned to him. "Then, enough with the nonsense Alhaitham. Just say what you have to say and leave." Your tone was calm but he heard the slight tremble in your voice. Even now, he was hurting you without meaning to.

Swallowing the lump in his throat, he said, "What I wanted to say is that I am sorry. I know I have countless things to apologize for and I … I cannot express how sorry I am. The word 'sorry' is not good enough." He looked down, ashamed of himself, a Haravatat scholar not having the right words to convey his intentions.

He wanted so badly to tell you how much he regrets taking you for granted and to let you know that since you left, all he could think about is you. Even when he somehow manages to stop doing so, everything he looks at seems to hold a piece of you and you invade his thoughts once more, as if you never left in the first place.

Your favorite mug sitting untouched in the kitchen cupboard reminds him of the coffees you used to make for him. The books gathering dust at his study bring back memories from when you would sit beside him, warm body pressed against his as you read your own books. The bed which was too big for one person makes him think about how lonely you must have been, spending those cold nights and silent mornings alone.

He lays awake at night in that same bed, haunted by the defeated look in your eyes the day you decided to end your relationship, or what's left of it. You were tired of fighting for a place in his life, you said.

The logical part of him argued that you were both better off this way. As long as he was the Acting Grand Sage, he knows that he cannot be the man you need, the man you deserve.

But here he was, hoping that you would still have him, because there's no one else for him but you.

"I - I am so sorry." He has no idea how many times he has uttered that word now. "For taking you for granted, for not fighting for you, for letting you go so easily. Y/N, I love you so much. I don't think it's possible for me to love anybody else." He confessed.

His hands itched to wipe the tears that streamed down your face. Gauging your reaction, he took a tentative step forward. "I know that I have no right to ask this from you, but Y/N … can you let me stay by your side again?"

Your heart was racing, everything around you was spinning. Contradicting thoughts were swimming inside your head - you wanted to say yes because you still love him, but at the same time, you wanted to push him away because you're afraid of getting hurt again.

You did not notice the tears freely cascading down your face until a hand wiped them away. Looking up at him, you said, “I don’t know Alhaitham. With the way things are between us …” You trailed off.

He reached for your trembling hand and brought it to his lips. “I never stopped loving you, even if my actions made you think otherwise. Let me prove it to you.”

Seconds pass without any response from you, Alhaitham speaks again, "You do not have to give me an answer now. Take all the time you need. I can wait." His grip on your hand tightened before letting go. “You should go inside now. It’s getting late.”

You nodded absentmindedly. He took a step back and you instantly missed the warmth that his body has to offer. You stepped inside your apartment, but for some reason, you cannot close the door while he is still there.

“Thank you for hearing me out. I meant every word I said, Y/N. I’ll wait for you, no matter how long it takes.”

thank you so much for reading! comments, reblogs and likes are appreciated ♡♡♡

#genshin impact #genshin impact angst #genshin angst #alhaitham #alhaitham angst #alhaitham x reader #alhaitham x y/n #alhaitham x you #genshin #genshin x y/n #genshin x you #genshin x reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact x you #genshin impact alhaitham #genshin alhaitham #genshin imagines #genshin fanfic #tags are hard

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the-marshals-wife · 1 year

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The Bad Batch Having a Token of Their Love For You Would Include (Bad Batch x Reader)

A/N: I love these boys so much and I thought of this instead of going to sleep all week. I really hope y'all like my idea for Echo's especially. He deserves the galaxy and more.❤️ (I also had extra ideas that are definitely still in character but probably "anachronistic", so I just labeled them bonus. I mean we have finally 'caf'' aka coffee in SW canon, so maybe there's hope for hoodies 🤭)

Description: Bad Batch x Fem!Reader | Warnings: none, just lots fluff and kisses

★ Bad Batch Tag List ★ @dantes-devil-huntress @sageislostinspring (comment to be added!)

Gif credit: user mutantfactor

Hunter

He would get a tattoo of your name

Hunter did not need his heightened senses to be certain that he had fallen in love with you - if anything, they just strengthened his conviction that you were the one he was meant to find

Being the intensely devoted and thoughtful man he is, you were on his mind constantly, and he wanted a symbol of his love to be as a part of him as you had become

He didn't even tell you at first because he wanted it to be surprise

It wasn't until he changed into plainclothes for an undercover mission that you noticed the new black ink on his right bicep

You grabbed his arm and stared at the Aurebesh letters spelling your name

"You like it?" he asked, a little nervous

Speechless, you pulled him into a kiss

"I'll take that as a yes" he smiled, before getting another embrace filled with kisses

Whenever you have time alone together, you love to slowly trace the letters with your finger and listen as he dreamily talks about the future

Later in your relationship, he would want to add to it with a portrait of you, and someday, the names of your children

Bonus: he would keep anything you gave him like a pendant or a ring and wear it whenever he could (this man would totally wear one of your scrunchies and make it look hot - a product of his 'girl dad' powers that you find very attractive)

Wrecker

He would keep your shirt to cuddle with

The only thing Wrecker has ever been discreet about in his entire life is his feelings as he was falling for you

It wasn't for lack of trying. He had been officially head over heels for months, but every time he tried to tell you, his words suddenly came out wrong

You thought it was adorable, and you were sure he'd figure out how to say what he was feeling when he was ready. It just gave you more opportunity to realize you were falling for him too

What you couldn't figure out, however, was where your favorite shirt had disappeared to

That is until, after days of searching, you finally caught a glimpse of it tucked beneath the pillow in Wrecker's bunk

You were stifling a giggle when he walked up behind you, looking nothing less than mortified

"Oh, Y/N! That! I uh...I found it on the floor and I was going to give it back to you! But it smelled really nice, and pretty...like you, and um, then I forgot..." he stammered, his face bright red

You smiled and kissed him on the cheek, "Keep it."

In the weeks following, you would refresh it with a spray of your perfume every so often when he wasn't looking

He would also draw doodles of you whenever he had downtime

You were all on a mission not long after the discovery of that day, and during his watch, you rolled over to see him drawing in the sand with a stick. He'd scribbled your initials together within a heart, surrounded by a dozen tinier hearts.

Suffice to say he was not the only one feeling absolutely smitten from then on

Bonus: speaking of shirts, you would absolutely be the couple with the "If lost, return to ___ + I'm ___" tees (likely worn with your matching homemade 'friendship' bracelets)

Tech

He would keep a recording of your voice and laughter

Tech is a private person when it comes to his emotions, but he feels very deeply, even if he isn't sure how to best express his growing affection for you (he thinks it's obvious, after all)

It's this very reason why you doubted that he returned your feelings at first, until you walked by him one day and heard the sound of your own laughter, playing over and over

"What's that?" you questioned, now recognizing the moment that had caused your sides to nearly split (Wrecker had just taken the most dramatic fall into mud you'd ever seen, immediately after bragging he was 'too heavy' to slip)

Tech muted the sound and kept his stare on the datapad, "I capture auditory recordings of all of my interactions for analysis, and file away important data for later reference."

"My laughing is 'important data'?" you smirked as he hesitated for only a moment

"Well, no. Not technically. It is, however, a pleasant sound that reminds me of you, and one that I would like not to forget. By that reasoning, it is important to me," he stated, calmly meeting your awe-struck gaze

It took all your strength not throw yourself into his arms right then and there. He went back to filing his recordings, oblivious to the fact that he had just irreversibly won your heart

He'd also incorporate you into some of his private passcodes

Anything from your initials to your eye color to your favorite flower - just some of the many details that he associates with you and remind him of how much he cares for you

Bonus: if he had a lockscreen/background, it would definitely be a picture of you. He would also be the type to make you a playlist of your favorite songs all from memory because he knows you that well

Crosshair

He would engrave your name on his rifle

Crosshair is a man of conviction and loyalty, and when he was certain that he could trust you with his heart, he wanted to display his loyalty in turn

Modifying his rifle in any way at all is significant, so ingraining your name on the scope is a very personal gesture to him

He caught you completely by surprise on a mission, casually showing it to you while you had watch together

You were stunned to see your name glistening in the firelight, every letter expertly etched into the smooth metal, "Cross, I can't believe you would do that for me..."

"Your love makes my aim true," he replied, wholly sincere

This one remark sealed your fate, giving you both the courage to lean in and share your first kiss

"Then you will never miss," you whispered afterward

You spent the rest of your watch sitting close together in soothing silence under the stars

He would also carve your initials into the wall of his bunk

Wherever he would go, you would be there also. His devotion is unyielding, and you have a partner until the galaxy itself burns up

Bonus: a huge sign of his affection would be letting you wear his clothes. He may act disgruntled, but it's all in jest because would be the boyfriend that's extremely proud to see you walking around in his hoodie

Echo

He would have your handprint on his armor

It seemed like a lifetime since he'd had the handprint from Captain Rex on his chestplate that had meant so much to him through those long years of war

When Echo is sure of something, nothing can move him from it. Not much time was required for him to know that he wanted to share his life with you, and that he wanted your handprint on his armor

He confided in you quite a bit about his past in the GAR, and you knew about the original print, but you never dreamed that he would ask you to replicate it

"Are you sure?" you asked in disbelief

"I am, Y/N. There's no one else whose mark I'd rather carry with me, and no one I want by my side more. On and off the battlefield," he confessed, taking your hand in his

Tears welling in your eyes, you dipped your other hand into the red paint on the table, placed it carefully onto his chest, and pressed your lips to his

More than a symbol of love, you both knew this was a vow to keep fighting for a free galaxy where you could build a future together

He would also have a photo of you in his personal things

He's not afraid of letting his relationship with you be known around his brothers, but his horrifying experiences imprisoned by the Separatists have made him extra cautious in all things. He keeps his photo of you safely tucked away and never brings it on missions, not wanting to risk it falling into the hands of anyone who would ever want to harm you

Instead, whenever you're apart, he holds his hand to his chest before he drifts to sleep and dreams of you. The nightmares are all but gone

Bonus: you two would totally have matching caf mugs with snarky sayings. "Grumpy parents in the morning" vibes all the way

#the bad batch imagine #the bad batch headcanons #hunter x reader #wrecker x reader #tech x reader #crosshair x reader #echo x reader #star wars imagine #star wars headcanons #the bad batch #my writing #yes wrecker's and tech's are a bit longer #they're my faves what can i say? 🥰#plus echo and yn are totally married now i don't make the rules 🤭#the bad batch x reader #bad batch headcanons

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eggsdrawings · 2 months

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This might sound stupid, but have you ever considered giving some of the characters in your drawings imperfect teeth? I sorta have headcannons that Mina has a gap between her front teeth and that Denki has a chipped tooth! I also love how you give Bakugou gauged earrings in your art-style in reference to the Fantasy AU and was wondering what types of specific headcannons you have in your art!

Some neat ones I noticed were:

Bakugou with faint moles on his face and neck

Ochako having orange ombre on the longer strands of hair (My personal fav)

Hawks having claw-like fingernails (and painted black too!)

Mirko having piercings on her ear

Todoroki has small strands of the opposite hair colour on the wrong side (Like strands of white on the red side and vise-versa)

Toga having pointed ears! (Another fave)

I probably missed some, but those were just cool details I noticed in your art! <3

Sorry, this was a weird way to give you a compliment lol

ahhh this is so sweet! thank you so much for lookin into the details of my art!!!! 💗💗💗 i have fun makin the characters unique to me!

i’ll include it all under the cut so that this post isn’t too long!

i usually tend to give midoriya a slight gap between his front teeth, tho i suppose i could stand to make it more prominent. i kinda draw it the same way cody from total drama has a gap in his teeth! the most ive done aside from that is give some characters fangs (hawks) or sharper canines (bakugou). i think kaminari having a chipped tooth is actually a cool idea, especially since i had one of my own growing up lol!

aside from what u listed, i like to make mina’s tongue blue solely because it stands out against how pink she is and makes for good contrast

todoroki’s scar has a dripping effect to it since i assume the kettle water poured down his face a bit before his mother could reach him to take care of it

i draw kaminari with freckles because i think it suits him, and ive been thinkin bout giving some light ones to hawks as well

for kirishima i draw three light scars on his face around the bridge of his nose/cheeks, a small reference to his hero costume’s mask placement since i think it would dig into his skin after so much use

i also like to add bakugou’s first war arc scars, as well as explosion marks around his hands from excessive quirk use. and ive been meaning to include scars on his arms to reference the deku vs kacchan fight now that ive gone and rewatched the series!

in canon, touya has very prominent eyelashes when he’s younger, and when he’s older as dabi they’re burned off. but i like to keep them as a slight nudge to who he used to be, even if it doesn’t particularly make sense for them to be there. i just think it’s a nice touch!!

#sorry for ramblinggggg #for accessories i love giving kirishima a slightly rainbow-colored bracelet #as well as him and bakugou having gold bracelets because every krbk speculated that they got matching bracelets after kamino LOL #accessories like Bakugou’s orange necklace is also a reference to the fantasy au and I like to include that sometimes #and kaminari and jirou’s accessories tend to always be in the bi flag colors #and if i draw uraraka and todoroki together i think it’s nice to have a matching cat bracelets between them #i like to give midoriya and kaminari bandaids a lot of the time because i feel like both of them are prone to injury #and momo mina and camie have long nails because i think that it would be in character for them to have that #that’s about all I can think of rn but !!! thank u so much ☺️💗💗#ask box #yalocalfanficaddict

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jennagrinsoverml · 2 years

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hello, idk if you've done this yet, but do u know any good post reveal pre relationship fic recs? sorry if this request is kinda vague lol

General requests are easier than super specific ones lol so you don’t need to apologize for that! I have been meaning to do a PRPR rec list for a while now (and, not directed at you, anon, but yes, PRPR stands exclusively for post-reveal pre-relationship) so thanks for giving me the push to finally do it! (Sorry, I may have gotten a little carried away with this one, but it’s truly one of my favourite things to read.)

The Official Summer Buster Kiss List by @peachcitt

“You’d really be alright with kissing me?” he asked, and Marinette popped the cap of her dry-erase marker on and off.

“I mean, yeah,” she said, and they stared at each other for a moment. “Of course,” she hurried on, “you’d have to be alright with being my candidate. Teacher. Guide. Whatever.” She made a few empty gestures with the marker, and the loose cap flew off the end, bouncing off the wall and rolling off her desk.

Adrien caught it before it could fall to the floor, handing it back to her. “I am,” he said, looking her in the eye. “I’ll do it.”

a very simple four-point plan to tackle the issue of marinette's abysmal kissing life that turns into a six-point plan and also results in an outcome that literally no one could have predicted (sarcasm)

One-shot. They’re just so incredibly stupid (affectionate). The writing is gorgeous, the humour is spot on, and I loved all the little details of their lives with the passage of time. It’s so clear that they love each other, but as always, it takes them way too long to admit it haha.

Emergency Contact by @coffeebanana

When Marinette invites Adrien to live with her temporarily while she recovers from an injury, she thinks the hardest part is going to be hiding her feelings from him. But Adrien's idea of being helpful might go...a little overboard.

Post Shadow Moth defeat, Aged Up Characters, Read the Tags

Multi-chapter. This fic is just so real and messy and beautiful. The mutual pining is absolutely perfect! The backstory and how that impacts their current dynamic is so well woven through and adds another layer to their relationship. But also, I love the lack of perfection, that these are real people with real flaws and the way that all plays out. I absolutely love this fic!

rainwater and brown sugar by @aerequets

He knew they shouldn't do anything (whatever that 'anything' was). They couldn't. Not until they defeated Hawkmoth. Not until their relationship wouldn't get in the way of their work (or whatever other excuse they'd come up with over the course of three months). He knew all this. He knew.

But it was the raindrop that did it for him.

One-shot. It’s seriously unfair that someone who draws so beautifully should be able to write equally so. And yet. This is just so beautiful and SOFT and lovely. And then THAT KISS!!!!!

An Open Secret by @kasienda

Adrien whirled around toward Marinette. She smiled at him.

He couldn’t smile back. He stared at her like the dumb blond model that he was often accused of being.

Something shifted in her expression. And her warm open Marinette smile transformed into Ladybug’s grin. He was looking at Ladybug right now.

He knew Ladybug’s name!

Her name was Marinette Dupain-Cheng.

And he couldn’t say anything! Not to Marinette! Not even to Plagg, who had confided two weeks prior that Master Fu was growing increasingly paranoid since the location of his home and hideout had been compromised. Their master had apparently decided that Chat Noir and Ladybug would have to give up their miraculouses if they ever discovered each other’s identities.

It wasn’t fair!

...

A fic where they both know, but can't openly talk about it.

Multi-chapter. I absolutely love the early reveal in this fic. I’ve read a lot of reveals, but this one is really fun and original! And then the premise of the fic itself isn’t one I’ve seen anywhere else, which makes it very different from the usual PRPR fare. Because even though they both know...they can’t actually talk about it. And it’s so interesting and different and sweet?

A little push by @emsylcatac

Alya asks Chat Noir to record a video of himself encouraging Marinette to confess...to Adrien.

Of course his mouth speaks on its own. Of course he says yes.

Of course his Lady is most likely sure to kill him.

...And of course Marinette feels like she's the one who's about to die.

One-shot. @emsylcatac‘s fics never go the way that I expect them to, and I really love that about her writing. Although this starts off really silly, the way Adrien expresses himself at the end wasn’t something I saw coming at all, even though it’s SO TRUE to his character. The pining and miscommunication is wonderful, but it’s the ending that really sells me on this one.

17 days, 2 hours and some odd minutes by @miabrown007

It has been 17 days, 2 hours and 14 minutes since Chat Noir flirted with Ladybug for the last time.

It has been exactly 17 days, 2 hours and 13 minutes since Adrien realized his very good friend and his best friend were, in fact, one and the same.

Consecutively, it has been exactly 17 days, 2 hours and 12 minutes since he constantly fought the insurmountable desire to kiss the said friend.

One-shot. The yearning in this fic is absolutely e x q u i s i t e . I love it when Adrien stops flirting post-reveal and Marinette takes it the wrong way. And they’re just SO STUPID here, and then they get to be adorable in love dorks.

the wonderful part of the mess that we made by heresie_irisee

They knew.

They knew, and there would be no magical reset button for the memories they'd made today. She'd have to see him at school every day, and she'd see the Chat in him, as surely as he'd see the Ladybug in her.

One-shot but a lengthy one-shot. How about some post-Oblivio fic that has the magical ladybugs NOT erase their memories of the fight (because lbr that made no sense anyway)? Oblivio is probably my favourite episode and this is such a great fic. The mutual pining is so, so, so good! Especially love Marinette struggling to assimilate Adrien’s identities and Adrien’s obliviousness.

The Boy She Loves by @goth-bias

Adrien just wants to know who Marinette has been in love with this entire time, but she refuses to budge. Accidentally reading a part of her diary, however, gives Adrien the answers he has been looking for.

One-shot. So you may not know this about me, but I’m absolute sucker for the trope of Adrien fixating on the boy Marinette loves post-reveal. (And tbf for him fixating on the boy Ladybug loves pre-reveal.) I love how well done the miscommunication is here, where their failure to confess makes sense and all of the tension naturally follows.

Make it clear by @amiraculousplatypus

After years, the masks have fallen. Marinette and Adrien figure out what has changed. And what hasn't.

One-shot. This one is all about the yearning. And then Adrien’s beautiful honesty that pushes Marinette to finally do something. They’re both so in character and I love them so much!

White Lies Over White Nights by meirencollector

“Tell me, Marinette. The other boy, is it me?"

There’s something about the way he says it. The way his lips move. The way his eyes glaze at her. The way he looks at her as if she hung the moon and stars. The way there’s a warm glow when he's drawing close to touch. Even in this snowstorm, he was a ray of sunshine, and she was a sunburn.

One-shot. This one is really interesting because of both its device--a game of Truth or Drink--and its use of non-linear storytelling. Even though the fic is set post-reveal, we get all kinds of flashbacks to memories of their pre-reveal interactions that really illuminate the present and are extremely well woven into the narrative. I also really appreciated how honest Adrien was about his feelings, even with their relationship being so ambiguous.

The following fics are amazing and absolutely worth reading, but do feature sexual content, so minors beware.

your lips are meant to be kissed by @zimtlein

During a tipsy evening, Adrien kisses Marinette’s forehead.

Understandably enough, Marinette has a complete meltdown.

One-shot. Rated E for sexual content. This is one of my favourite fics and I’ve read it a good half a dozen times at least. The pining is absolutely phenomenal and Adrien is so, so oblivious. And the tension between them just builds and builds and builds until I thought I was going to die! But instead it all leads to a phenomenal resolution.

#miraculous ladybug #ml fanfic #ml fic #ml fic rec #adrienette #adrinette #ml love square #post-reveal pre-relationship #prpr #jennarecsml #ml fic recs #marichat #ladrien #ladynoir

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tyranasauruslex · 5 months

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What did Roman and Lukas get each other for Christmas?

Lukas

Lego.

To prevent even more arguments and family hostility, the remaining Roy’s have decided to do Secret Santa which initially sounded like a good idea, until Tom kept trying to tamper with the selection process to get Lukas (an easy win to suck up to your boss over Christmas) whilst Kendal refused to let Shiv, Tom, Lukas or Greg participate. After much sibling bickering, Shiv and Lukas are allowed back in the Secret Santa draw but when Roman excitedly brings this up to Lukas, he’s met with a firm no.

Already perplexed by the vast amount of unwritten, and quite frankly confusing, Neurotypical social rules and expectations surrounding Christmas, adding surprise gifts into the mix is just too much for Lukas. If someone insists on getting him something - like Oskar or his mum - then he will provide them with a very specific list that must not be deviated from otherwise he gets overwhelmed and flustered. Roman reports back with a vague explanation that Lukas is fine not being in the Secret Santa which annoys Kendall because now they’re an odd number and Willa decide that she’s getting him something anyway which Roman has to repeatedly tell her not to do.

Oskar then makes it his mission to explain to Lukas that Roman would probably like to get him a Christmas present and after weeks of pestering, Roman is eventually presented with a piece of paper that just says Lego on it. Usually he would be more specific but he trusts Roman - although he does get increasingly more anxious the closer it gets their gift exchange; he’s still not quite nailed down the appropriate response to receiving something he doesn’t like.

At first Roman is a little underwhelmed that all Lukas wants is an assortment of plastic bricks, until he discovers that he can do a custom order and ends up with a large scale Viking Village, Viking Longboat and a bunch of villagers designed to look like Team GoJo. It’s a bit odd giving someone a gift they already know they’re getting, and unwrapped as requested, but Lukas seems genuinely excited when Roman hands over the Lego. Like, incredibly excited and Roman knows him well enough by now to know this isn’t Lukas masking or pretending he likes the gift to spare his feelings. They end up making the Viking Longboat together before Roman flies off to Scotland with the other Roys for Christmas and Lukas heads back to Sweden.

Lukas then keeps sending him “Building Updates” of the Viking village which is the most adorably dorky thing Roman has ever seen.

Roman

A cat.

The dog cage story comes up one evening after Roman has a nightmare about being trapped in a cage and unable to get out. It didn’t sound like the amusing childhood story he tried to make it out to be, and Lukas adds it to his ever growing list of reasons why he needs to protect Roman from his insane family. Once the panic had subsided, Roman joked that he’d always preferred cats anyway and Lukas knows enough by now to know that there’s a lot of truth hidden in those “jokes” so he sets about finding Roman the perfect furry friend for Christmas. A cat is also better than whatever silly Secret Santa gift the Roy’s will come up with, so Lukas is pretty confident that he’ll “win” Christmas. It’s a long process because’s Lukas is obsessed with finding the perfect cat for Roman until Oskar finds a Norwegian Forest Cat breeder just outside Gothenburg. They ditch their meetings for the day and head up into the countryside to pick one out.

There’s an amber coloured one, smaller than the rest, that keeps being trampled over by the all the other kittens that the breeder tries to dissuade him from looking at, but it’s also the only one that manages to scale it’s way up Lukas’s leg and eventually sit on his shoulder; purring loudly for attention. Twelve weeks later the newest member of Team GoJo is making his way through the Swedish countryside to Lukas’s mums house in preparation for Roman’s arrival on Boxing Day. Roman has barely got through the door before Lukas is pulling him up to their bedroom to finally give him his present that’s been trying to claw it’s way out of the cat carrier.

After he stops crying, Roman names his new BFF Sven and Lukas is satisfied with the knowledge that not only did he make his boyfriend happy but he also won Christmas.

Six months later Sven the Cat has 11 million followers on instagram and spends his time traveling the globe with his dads and invading Lego Viking villages.

#lukas matsson #roman roy #romelukas #roman x lukas #roman roy x lukas matsson #romanlukas #romlukas

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lil-tachyon · 1 year

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Recommend dinosaur media besides Jurassic Park?

Dinotopia: All the books are super fun, but the first and last are the best. Just some rambling, cozy journeys through an imagined land of prehistoric beasts and eclectic architecture. The middle two books are still great in terms of visuals, but they lean too much into narrative stuff and I don't think that's Gurney's strong point. The writing feels a lot more like a child's first chapter book. Maybe that's what he was going for, I'm not sure.

Xenozoic Tales: Long time fans of the blog will at this point be tired of me recommending it, but I'm not going to stop because most people I talk to (even other terminally-online SFF artists) still haven't read it. It's obviously super pulpy but it really grows into itself toward the end and is able to handle some more mature ideas without ever taking itself too seriously. Highly recommend.

An Alphabet of Dinosaurs: Just a great collection of Wayne Barlowe's paleoart. It's a 10-minute read and it's aimed at kids but you're buying it for the art and its one of the only Barlowe books you can reliably pick up for less than $10 so I'd say it's worth it. Good chance your library may have it, too.

Dinosaurs by Thomas R Holtz Jr: Very accessible non-fiction work on dinosaur biology and cladistics. It's probably a bit dated now (came out in 2007) and the art is very hit-or-miss (about half the illustrations are obvious products of the era of early digital art when everyone was photobashing and throwing these awful digital textures onto everything, ugh...) but it remains a fun and informative read. If anyone has a more contemporary but similarly thorough dinosaur book, please let me know! I know there have been a lot of huge discoveries, especially from China, since this book came out.

C. M. Kosemen's (keep track of how many times that name appears on this list) and @simon-roy 's Dinosauroids: This was a HUGE influence on what I wanted to draw and what kind of stories I wanted to tell when I first found it and middle school and it still totally holds up. Check it out here!

Walking With Dinosaurs: Huge, multi-part BBC documentary from 1999 that presented stories about Mesozoic fauna as if it was a contemporary nature documentary. The CGI for which it was initially so famous is very dated now but the practical effects are great and it's honestly the narration and presentation that sells it anyway. Also recommend Walking With Monsters which is the same thing but for the Paleozoic. People routinely upload both series on youtube, they're not hard to find.

All Yesterdays by Jon Conway, C. M. Kosemen, and Darren Naish: Unique and outrageous reconstructions of dinosaurs and other paleofauna that challenge our preconceptions and highlight the limits of our understanding of their appearance and behavior. Also really cool for me personally because in my lifetime I've seen this book go from a neat project by people I followed on deviantart to being (rightly) considered a landmark in paleoillustration.

Dino Run: This game bangs and I pity the kids who weren't around in 2008 when this took over the internet for a brief but wonderful period

The Rite of Spring segment from Fantasia: From the big bang to the climactic end of the Mesozoic, all set to Stravinsky. Apparently the only Disney media I enjoy is stuff that The Mouse just does not give a shit about because this one's also on youtube.

That's some stuff off the top of my head, should be enough for now. I may add more if I think of it. Some parting thoughts:

C. M. Kosemen's youtube channel is great for learning about what I'll call "esoteric paleontology" for lack of a better term. Also he just does lots of weird, eclectic videos that I find interesting.

I don't hesitate to recommend Genndy Tartakovsky's Primal because he's literally never disappointed me and everyone I know says it's great, but I personally have not yet gotten around to watching it.

I don't promote pseudoscience, but I do think David Peters is a funny guy with weird, neat ideas. TLDR this one guy has a bunch of fringe theories about pterosaur biology and believes that because literally no one else agrees with him that he must be being censored by "mainstream science." Don't believe any of it, just enjoy the weirdness.

Any time you can pick up a dinosaur or other paleofauna book secondhand, I recommend you do it. Tons of outdated and cheap books that nonetheless contain great illustrations. That kinda stuff is a constant source of inspiration for me.

The Land Before Time is probably still great. It's been over a decade since I last watched it, but I have fond memories. Maybe time for a rewatch...

#dinosaurs #paleoart #dinosaur media #wayne barlowe #cm kosemen #send me an ask!

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bmodiwrites · 11 months

Text

Do I Wait For Fate? | E, 3000

Steve Harrington is an old athlete who overdoes himself during a rec league basketball game. His efforts gain him a torn ACL and ten weeks of physical therapy. Upon arriving, Steve is dreading the whole thing but the therapist he ends up with changes his attitude about the whole thing. Eddie, who is doing rounds for OT school, puts Steve back together and brings him back to life... one dicking down at a time.

A Boy Named Xander | G, 1360

Nancy has seen Steve and Eddie fall in love, come together to make a family, and build the most perfect life. Now they're adding to it. She's only slightly taken aback that the boy she thinks is her daughter's age is almost fully grown. Funny now preconceived notions can change a situation.

Lost Boys Life | G, 2822

Twenty years is a big anniversary and Steve plans to go all out. He disguises Eddie's gift in a family trip to Disneyland where their daughter and Robin and Nancy's two kids reap all the benefits. It's not until Steve takes Eddie to a meet and greet that the truth of their trip comes to light. Read to find out what happens when lost boys grow up and add another member to their timeless crew.

Because Your Kiss (Is On My List) | G, 2017

Sophomore Eddie Munson has a secret… one that everyone and their brother knows. His crush on Steve Harrington isn't a quiet one, though not through Eddie's own devices. The popular kids love to mess with him by pairing him up with Steve at every turn. This time around, they invite him to a party in hopes of humiliating him further. Too bad no one knows Steve Harrington is harboring a crush of his own.

I Can't Get No Relief | E, 4049

Steve loves the summer months, the freedom and the heat. He's a fan of the pool and all the time he gets to spend with his found family. All is well except for the glaring lust that overcomes him whenever Eddie is around. Between crop tops and slight flashes of skin, Steve is going mad from the want. Read to find out what happens when Eddie realizes just how thirsty Steve really is.

The Night We Met | G, 2026

Steve Harrington is in the midst of a depressive spiral the night he goes out for a 2AM run. He's completely taken off guard by a car hitting him and has no real idea how that one event is going to change his life. In that moment, Steve meets Wayne Munson, who is both rough around the edges and apologetic for his mistake. Read to find out how found family changes the course of Steve Harrington's life. Happiness can be found at the end of every truck bed.

(Falling In Love) Losing Control Now | E, 2562

Eddie has been having a bad week. Maybe a bad couple of weeks. He's at his wits end when he walks in the door to find a surprise waiting for him. Steve knows just how to take Eddie's mind off his problems, proposing the most outlandish, off the wall, yet fun activity for them both. Read to find out what happens when Nerf darts and stripping come into play.

Something Borderline Sacred | E, 17479

Eddie is a struggling musician with a health problem when he meets Steve Harrington, a newly enlisted Marine. They hate each other from the start but a series of circumstances throws them together. Find out what happens when Eddie gets married to a stranger to scam the government - he's so sure he'll be able to use Steve & run the other way. What makes a marriage & when feelings become involved, can Eddie & Steve make it work?

You Drew Stars Around My Scars | E, 4456

Eddie Munson is a successful story board artist working in an office building. One night, drawing late, Eddie is interrupted by the new custodian. Never in his wildest dreams does Eddie ever think he'll befriend someone at work but here he is, getting swept up by cuteness and a detached attitude. As things progress, Eddie wonders why Steve never talks about himself or why he's never seen the man's home. He'll soon find out there's so much more to a person than the navy blue jumpsuit they wear to work everyday.

Worse Ways To Stay Alive | E, 3316

Steve Harrington's parents aren't total shits. They accidentally notice Steve's hearing loss and get him help. One form of that is a weekly support group that meets twice a week where a brown eyed, curly headed boy changes Steve's life. He's not completely sold on the silence but it grows on him as he learns to navigate life and where he fits in it without the harsh buzz of constant noise.

I Guess I Have To Fall In Love With Strangers | T, 4414

Steve Harrington has a secret. He's been obsessed with this band, Bad Wabbit, for ages. They're new and hip and only advertise for their shows through riddles and clues that must be found by their fans. One such occasion, Steve is on the hunt for the latest venue when he meets Eddie Munson, someone also looking for Bad Wabbit. Can something small and silly like a shitty drawing bring two people together for the rest of their lives? Read to find out!

All the Pretty Girls | T, 4193

Eddie Munson recognizes something in himself long before he knows what that sort of feeling actually means. It's curious to grow up in a time and space where everyone can have what they want but him. Yet, Steve Harrington is feeling the same sort of dissatisfaction. All the girls like him but he's enamored with a brunette boy with curls to die for. What happens when Steve comes to his senses and tries to become himself again? Read to find out!

#steddie #masterlists #fic masterlist #stranger things #steve harrington #eddie munson #steve harrington/eddie munson #steve harrington x eddie munson #steddie fic #steddie fanfic #bobbie writes #steddie masterlist

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cadybear420 · 28 days

Note

What is your favorite childhood memory?

What is your least favorite childhood memory?

What do you think had the biggest impact on you growing up?

What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do?

You’re given an unlimited budget to build anything you want! What do you build and where do you build it?

What is your favorite childhood memory?

Aiden: Easy. The time I played Mozart's 16th Sonata at my first recital when I was six.

Evie: I remember that! I mean, how could I not. The day you told me that--

Aiden: Was the day you started falling for me, I know. *he kisses her on the cheek, making her grin* What about your favorite?

Evie: Damn, I really can't pick. Probably the time my dad surprised me with a vacation trip to this resort I always wanted to go to?

Aiden: Oh yes! We gotta go visit that place ourselves as well.

Evie: Fuck yeah!

What is your least favorite childhood memory?

Evie: Do I have to answer that? Well... I guess one of the many times kids at school picked on me for fuck knows whatever reason.

Aiden: Well, there was this one time in preschool when we had to draw what career we wanted to have when we grew up. I made this drawing of mysef as a musician that I was really proud of. But then on parents' day, the teacher asked us to get our pictures... and I may have been a bit too excited... I sort of tried to run past the other kids, but got into a fight with one of them that somehow led to my picture getting ripped in half. I know this one sounds a bit juvenile to still be upset about, but--

Evie: You didn't like that something you worked so hard on and was precious to you got destroyed?

Aiden: Exactly! It was bad enough when it happened with a drawing I made as a four-year-old, I just can't possibly imagine something similar happening to any of the stuff I work on as I'm older...

Evie: Fucking same.

What do you think had the biggest impact on you growing up?

Evie: Honestly I have no fucking clue, haha...

Aiden: Definitely years of dedication to music and music practice.

What’s the hardest thing you’ve ever had to do? + You’re given an unlimited budget to build anything you want! What do you build and where do you build it?

Answered here for Evie!

Aiden: As of now... probably the whole band drama and how I had to try and get everyone to agree on a song to play for halftime. But I'm probably forgetting something else. As for the building question... as much as I'd like to say "a new concert hall"... I'd actually go with Evie's idea. We can build our own special dream house together. It is for both of us after all.

Evie: Awwwww! *big grin*

Aiden: And I mean, I maybe could add a concert hall as part of it?

Evie: Hell yeah!

Ask List Here!

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hella1975 · 1 year

Note

Reading Tams Chapter 4 : )

Haven't started yet but if whatsherface dies im going to be very disappointed

Muchen is being a real twat right about now

I feel like Zukos going to fire bend at him

He didnt

Lihua to the rescue!

Are they going to kill her???

No they didnt okay

I was scared there for a second

FUCK IS SHE GOING TO DIE AGAIN???

No???

HELLA WHAT THE FUCK

YOU KILLED HER

I cant BELIEVE TYOUVE DONE THIS

Im not mad im disappointed

Im not going to recover from this

I dont think Zuko is either, seems like the type of thing thats going to haunt him the rest of the series.

“if you have me on tumblr then you know lihua was always going to die” idk if you mean like ‘hellas inner circle’ people or people who follow you in general but if its the latter NO THE FUCK I DIDNT

I HAD FAITH IN YOU

I HAD FAITH IN YOU AND IT BIT ME IN THE ASS

You let me get emotionally attached I cant believe you

This is traumatic

I didnt have the intention of all but three of these points being about Lihua but thats your own fault

Im getting her name tattooed onto me now i feel the burden to carry her memory with me the rest of my life

Oh my God hella this is the worst thing you’ve ever done

I can excuse you torturing Zuko for like 3 or 4 months (???) and giving him a macBeth level mental breakdown BUT I DRAW THE LINE AT YOU KILLING LIHUA

idek if im spelling her name right.

Im going to have a macbeth level mental breakdown now

Ill try to move on

Have you seen that post that says like ‘when you read multiple fics from the same author sometimes you notice certain like patterns and things that just keep popping up in their writing and stories’? Thats not to quote it but thats the general idea.

Like in my thing about the last chapter I mentioned the whole ‘leaving a blade behind to tell someone you didnt leave willingly’ thing is prevalent in both taob and tams. WELL APPARENTLY YOU ALSO GET OFF ON KILLING PEOPLE WHO ARE VERY YOUNG BUT ALSO OLDER SIBLINGS AND THEYRE YOUNGER SIBLINGS ARE ALSO DEPENDANT ON THEM’

Lihua is with Lanse now in a very specific part of heaven reserved for the characters you have the absolute audacity to murder in cold blood

AND THEY BOTH START WITH THE LETTER L!! COINCIDENCE?? I THINK NOT!

That should have been the first sign

I am never growing attached to people who has L as the first letter of their name again that you write.

Currently scanning my mind of any of the taob people whose name starts with L and I cant think of anyone so this might not be a reliable indicator.

THESE ARE PEOPLE YOUR KILLING HELLA DO THEIR LIVES MEAN NOTHGIN TO YOU???

I cant believe this

Okay serious now

I think

We’ll see

Another thing for my ‘favorite things about hella’ thing and this time it isnt about your writing skills!

(which are magnificent btw, you make it too easy to praise your writing)

You do this thing where you add an x to the end of your messages. Like I’ve seen you do it on discord and when you screenshot messages you do it and I just think its neat.

Its not prominent or deep but its worth mentioning

LIST ANON DISCOVERS BRITISH KISSES AT THE END OF SENTENCES IT IS ME GIVING YOU A LITTLE MWAH ON THE NOSE WHEN IM DONE TALKING <3

your live reactions kill me both bc you're so lovely and also seeing INSTANT contradictions is hilarious. im glad you liked the chapter my love <3 i always look forward to your asks, they make my day x <- a kiss for u <3

#the lihua death was awful for me too ill allow the yelling bc i do actually deserve it this time 🫡#ask #tams asks #list anon

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randomfoggytiger · 1 year

Text

X-Files Collector’s Edition: Curated Jamie Greco

Jamie Greco can do it all-- write comedy at its peak, punctuate it with witty dialogue, then snap it sideways to highlight a deeper sentiment under its surface. Her characterizations are so *it* for me; she’s easily a top favorite of mine, as well as one of my “comfort read” authors for the days I just want to giggle and clutch my growing Grinch heart.

*Note: If individual Gossamer links don’t work, go to the Jamie Greco's main page and select the fics by name. I am but a mere mortal and Tumblr is a tricky beast. (Also-- If there are other/more links to these fics, I would love to be directed their way so I can add them to the list.)*

Loose chronological order below~

Jamie Greco (I have a whispersofx link, but no idea if it’s connected.)

Truth or Dare

““So you'll drive me home?"

"Of course. In two hours."

"That's it, I'm outta here."

"No, no no, Scully. Just give me ninety minutes."

"I've given you ten hours."

"Not to mention the best years of your life."

"Ha. Ha."

"Just kidding, Scully. I'm sure you have a few good years in you."

"Thanks a lot.””

A stakeout Truth or Dare doesn’t shake out how Mulder would want, as Scully is a taskmaster when it comes to winning and circumventing.

Quirky Foibles (Gossamer)

“There's something in the woods that wants to make an entree out of me; actually made the attempt and I am grateful to it. I'm in ten kinds of pain and I'm shivering and slightly nauseated and I have to figure out how to express my gratitude to what I think is a Mothman. Does Hallmark make a card for this? Most likely not.”

Mulder is one happy camp in shock in Detour. His rapid flow of thoughts are so delightful and grin-inducing.

Truth AND Dare (Gossamer)

““Ever entertain the idea that Skinner finds you enchanting and that's why he keeps calling you into his office for all of these bogus meetings?"

"Yeah, Mulder, I have thought of that. His eyes all but sparkle with enchantment while he's reaming me out for having the highest cell phone bill in the department. And last week, when he wanted to discuss our latest travel vouchers, I thought he was going to drool all over the front of his suit."

"So you have noticed.””

After a long meeting, Scully joins Mulder for another game of dares and truth (leading to Mulder grabbing for Scully’s lifeline to see if it matches his long one.)

I love, love, LOVE Jamie’s style of writing-- she has the character’s speech patterns down to a T and never falters.

Scarlet (Gossamer)

“...when she touches me, I can see her colors co-mingling with my own without being muddied or diluted in any way. No, her colors are becoming my colors; they are feeding me. My fingers are taking on her hues like a chameleon, and now my wrists and my elbows. It's like a miracle. Maybe it is a miracle. If she's an angel, maybe this is her way of showing me. Maybe I will simply absorb her truth and her faith and her loyalty. I know now that those are her colors.”

Mulder-- high on injected hallucinogens-- tries to get the “truth” from Scully about her hidden angelic aura; then pivots to pick a fight with Skinner over his “unprofessed love.” He will regret that one later.

This. Is. So. Sweet. Hilarious, yes; but so innocently adorable that the tooth rot it gives me is (mostly) from Mulder’s pure, unadulterated devotion... okay, and Scully’s concern and confusion melting into something more vulnerable.

Someday He’ll Laugh (Gossamer)

““Mulder!" I cry out, demanding his attention, but he is stubborn in his new found attempt at destruction. "Mulder!" I repeat, louder, but he doesn't hear. His world is infinitesimal. What isn't inside his head doesn't seem to exist.

I slap my hand against the glass and scream his name with every bit of the force he has used to invoke me. He pauses, remains still and cocks his head. Am I within or without? I slap my hand and he looks at it, focusing and drawing near.”

Angst at its best-- Biogenesis Scully can barely look at Mulder in his cell, tormented by his torment. Slowly she grasps her last ounces of courage and goes to give him hope, and something to hold onto.

I am not an angst person: too often the quality of Mulder and Scully’s character is lost to the machinations of the plot or newest injury. But Jamie blended these two so well that this fic stands proudly on its own two feet.

Sentinel (Gossamer)

“I am the sentinel. It wasn't the original intent, most certainly not; not in the way which I define the role today. I was perhaps the sentinel of the FBI's protocol in the eyes of those who sent me to him. At least that was the way I saw it at the time. A sentinel of the facts, of propriety, of scientific thought: that's how I perceived my position.

I was that sentinel so briefly.

I resigned that commission before I realized I had done so.”

Sein und Zeit Scully reflects on her duty to Mulder shifting and changing as her loyalty grew into deep love. Now she stands between Mulder and his loss-- self-destruction and recovery.

The last two lines are just the perfect clincher for this fic...

Breathing (Gossamer)

““There's absolutely nothing the matter with me."

"Okay, then why has your skin just taken on the hue of heaving ocean?"

"Don't say heaving, Scully."

"Churning?"

"Scully..."

"I don't believe this."

"Now imagine my surprise."

"That you, Fox Mulder, the unshakable, unmovable poster boy for strong constitutions, are set to queasiness by the thought of the most natural activity in the world."

"I am not--””

Alone-- Mulder and Scully are bumping along to Lamaze: quipping, reassuring, then detouring to eat sweet potato pie and ice cream.

This is, by far, my favorite S8 story (which is saying a lot, because S8 is MY season-- despite its NUMEROUS flaws-- and where I end canon.) I have many near and dear S8 fics... but THIS. I will always return to read over and over and over. It’s them. That’s Mulder and Scully. Wow. My very simple needs are met and more in this. It’s a fic with only dialogue... how is it THIS amazing?

It’s perfect that my list ended on my favorite fic-- totally didn’t plan that. “Must be fate, Mulder.”

Enjoy!

#txf #xf fanfic #x-files #fic #Collector's Edition #Curated #Jamie Greco #Short Entries #mine

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dumbassprotagonist · 1 year

Text

It's me, fucker.

2/11/18

Please, if you are not Bethany, don't read this. Or do I actually don't care that much.

Hey its me; you. But 5 years ago. Yes, this is 13 year old little fetus Bethany DeVito. I guess I'll start by refreshing your memory about what life was like back in the day. The latest events:

-people are eating tide pods. Yup.

- you realized only a few days ago that you are not bi, but a pure, 100% gay

- you still have those round glasses

-your ceiling currently has the northern hemisphere mapped out on it in glowing starts. It's pretty sick

-You're a fUCKING NERD but what's new

-you haven't moved in with dad just yet, but the custody battle will probably start soon. Mom still has no idea

-You're sons' first birthdays are next month

-ereri is life

- you cut that mole off two nights ago. Yup, that one.

- you got this idea from and Dan and Phil video

-as you type this, you are sick and want to fucking die

- you currently want to be a chemical engineer

- kaileigh still likes you

-You're in advanced art (and drawing Danny Devito as a project)

-Depression, Anxiety, and possible bpd. But the list goes on

-watsky.

-honestly you can go fuck yourself sideways with a stapler because you really are a little shit

-i don't care what you say, I am kin with waluigi

And that's the extent to which I'm willing to shower you in nostalgia that you never asked for. But now, it's time for you to answer some questions:

-do you eat anything but ramen?

-have you ever had a girlfriend? Do you have one now? Probably not but can't blame me for trying

-What fandom are you obsessed with right now? I know there's at least one

-are you still in marching band?

-did you make any new friends? Tbh probably not but whatever

-have the furries infiltrated the lgbt community yet? They've been trying for a while

-What's the deal with transracialism?

-have you come out to your parents yet?

-What's your favorite color right now?

-if you could give 13 year old you any advice right now, what would it be?

-how did WWIII go? I have to assume Trump started it

- what are your plans for college? Right now you want to go to MIT, even though you know it will never happen.

- is kaileigh still your best friend? Low-key wondering if she's still alive

-are your eyebrows still poppin?

-is gary the lemom still a very sour man?

-What's your relationship with your mom and Madeline?

-do you consider yourself Christian?

-read any great books lately? Describe them

-are you still a little sadistic fuck?

-are you still on prozac? Do you still get fucked up dreams?

-are you mentally stable yet because it's starting to get on my nerves

- is there any new slang that didn't exist in 2018?

-do you know any other languages?

- what is the most advanced piece of technology right now?

-did you ever find out your iq?

-anything new discovered about space?

-who was your first kiss?

- kaileigh asks: "Who’s the most important influence on you currently?"

-What's your cringiest moment so far?

-are you still into mbti?

-have you improved at all as an artist?

-did that mole grow back?

-have you gotten any better at taking care of yourself?

-any new mental illnesses to add to the collection?

-how was the ending of attack on titan?

-have you lost your virginity yet? Come on you're 18 Jesus christ

- What was it like being a mellophone section leader?

-did you ever take up piano again?

-do you finally have boobs? Please say you have at least a B.

-has your life become even remotely satisfying in these past five years? Hopefully.

I can't come up with any more questions at the moment. Hope you have a moderately successful adult life. Don't to drugs, always use peotection, and never pull out anal beads like you're revving a lawnmower. Peace, my good bitch. 👌

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takadasaiko · 1 year

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A Flicker of Light, Chapter Ten (a Star Wars fic)

Story Summary: A canon divergent AU in which Luke Skywalker is raised within the Empire to be either his father's heir as a Sith Lord… or his replacement.

Chapter Summary: Luke comes face-to-face with his father's former Padawan while Mara Jade and Darth Vader are forced to put aside their differences to try to find him.

FFN II AO3

---

Mara had spent the last few years tracking the Emperor's enemies down to every corner of the galaxy. There were times when she had a full dossier of information on them, and others when she knew relatively little. While one was often easier - unless the intel was incorrect like it had been with Visra - she had picked up enough useful tricks that finding a single teenager when she knew what planet and what city to look into should have been a simple task. Add to that that she knew her mark as well as she did, and the fact that she kept turning up empty was not a good sign.

Her first stop was the base. She checked in with Lieutenant List - the incompetently ambitious officer that Agent Kallus had made Mara's laissant and that Luke clearly had access to - to verify his or his men's last known sighting of the infamous Lord Natus. The lieutenant had partial and outdated intel that he stumbled through, clearly without an understanding of how a Force-sensitive individual might use meditation to find someone they were looking for. Patience had never been Luke's strong suit, though, so the fact that both his quarters and the space he and his father had been provided for their investigation were empty meant that he'd given up on that particular angle.

Next she found a guard on the base that had confirmed that he'd seen Luke leave and Mara wasted the next hour looking for him in town, the knot in her gut simultaneously growing and tightening with each passing moment. She was wasting time. If he'd been taken - something that she hadn't really thought was possible, even she had known that there would be less trouble if he knew someone was going to try something stupid - then her loose-lipped source was right. Visra and his little band of would-be rebels had found someone with talent to back financially. Now that someone had Luke.

Might have Luke. Mara stopped in the middle of the darkened street, forcing her raging thoughts into order. She didn't have any hard proof yet. She closed her eyes, did her best to clear her mind and ease her breathing, and reached…. The Emperor was the only person she'd ever been able to hear from anywhere in the galaxy, but if there was ever going to be an exception to that, it was going to be Luke.

She pictured him. From his darkening blond hair to those bright blue eyes to his smile that he'd never known had lifted her spirits as children. She focused on what his voice sounded like, the phrasings he used when he spoke, and she could almost feel his fingers against her wrist. Mara? It was his voice, but with none of the confidence that had underlined it since he'd made his way out into the galaxy.

Her eyes snapped open and she found herself in the street alone. He had been taken, but she didn't have any idea where, and she didn't have time to figure out if her limited skills in that particular arena could find him.

Mara took off in a sprint, barely stopping at the entrance to the base to show credentials and then moving as quickly as she dared to without drawing attention to the same wing that Vader was supposedly meditating in. She made it to the outer security and skipped past it and in, the Force doing the heavy lifting for her. The second set wouldn't have been nearly as easy for anyone else, but the Red Guards that traveled with Vader took orders from the Emperor above Vader - not that anyone had alerted him to that or he probably would have tossed them out the airlock the first chance he had - which meant that they allowed entrance to the Emperor's Hand, supposedly on her Master's orders.

She was escorted into the inner room, the Red Guard moving to the controls of a bacta tank. A man floated inside. Well, half a man. He was missing all four limbs, only stumps remaining in their place. His skin was ashen as if it hadn't seen any sunlight - natural or otherwise- in years, the scars leaving deep grooves in the sickly pale skin. Pieces of equipment were implanted into his chest and his throat, lights flashing, and as the bacta stirred around him, gold eyes flashing open.

Mara hadn't realized she was staring until that moment, nor had her brain really connected this damaged creature to the powerful Darth Vader until she was driven back by the Force, slamming her into the far wall hard enough that she saw dark spots dancing against her vision. She was lifted then - all by a man hanging by a harness in a bacta tank - and she felt an invisible hand close around her throat. She struggled not to fight it, instead focusing everything she had into a single name. "Natus," she choked out and the hold on her throat released, even if the grip holding her suspended in the air did not.

She watched from where she remained suspended as Vader was lifted from the tank by the harness, the breathing mask coming with him. As the liquid pooled on the permasteele below, Mara could see that the small groves in his skin weren't a trick played by air bubbles, but even further scarring. Burns, she thought. It was like he'd been burned alive. No wonder he lived in that suit. It must have been what was keeping him alive.

Green eyes followed as the harness eased him down, a medical droid moving into her line of vision to take hold and guide him to where what looked like only the torso of his suit waited for him. She watched as the droid eased him into it and then back onto a waiting table. With no warning the Force hold on her released with his distraction and she dropped unceremoniously to the floor. She could leave. Any sane person would have, but instead she continued to watch as four other droids joined, each with a mechanical limb in hand and they moved to the stumps all at once. Mara had her footing now, but nearly lost it with the onslaught of anguish that followed the reattachment of those nerves to a fully conscious patient. Finally, the helmet was put into place, shielding those terrifying Sith-gold eyes from her.

Then, all at once, the Red Guard that had escorted her in and had begun the extraction procedure fell dead, his head turned at an awkward angle. Those blacked out lenses of Vader's mask turned towards her. "Jade," he snarled, "what of my son?"

Mara swallowed hard, not used to having to steel her nerve like this. This was about Luke, and Luke was convinced his father loved him. Time to test that theory. "Natus has -" She cleared her throat hard, fingers going to it.

"Out with it," Vader growled.

She turned a hard glare on him, refusing to be intimidated. "Natus has been taken."

She couldn't see his ashy, scarred face, but she could imagine the look as fury leapt through the air like electricity.

—

He hated waking up after getting slammed by stun weapons. It had been a while since the 501st had been able to take him down quite that hard, and with the way his head was aching, they must have had to hit him several times.

Luke groaned as he forced his eyes open, but it wasn't the Executioner that came into slow and painful focus. Instead he was on the floor of what looked like a cleared out storage room. Right. He wasn't on his father's flagship and maybe not even on Lothal. The rebels they'd been chasing hadn't gotten the jump on him in the streets and they must have been the ones that brought him there. Well, he couldn't risk them gaining any more momentum. He rolled to his side, every muscle protesting the movement and made it to his knees. Slowly, intentionally, he got one foot under him and leveraged himself to stand, even if a little unsteadily.

One breath in, another out. He repeated the motion again and again, drawing on the Force until his head cleared and he was left standing in the center of the small room. He let his eyes remain closed even as he felt a presence approach the other side of the door. They must have been watching him. Fine. It wouldn't do them any good.

The door opened and Luke flashed into action. They'd taken his lightsaber, but they couldn't take his ability to use the Force. He lashed out at the Togruta woman who entered, fingers outstretched and the Force wrapping around her. She looked entirely unbothered by it, and it took only a fraction of a moment to see why as she managed to break his hold on her. He'd never seen anyone do that before.

Kanan Jarrus and Ezra Bridger came flying into the room even as Luke was pushed back and the teen felt power build with the anger inside of him. He lifted them both in the air, both squirming and unable to pull the stunt the woman just had. She was the real threat. He turned, ready to use them in his attack against her.

But she stood with her hand outstretched in a calming motion. "We're not here to hurt you, Luke."

It was like someone had dumped a bucket of ice water on his fury, replacing it with fear. "How do you know that name?"

"I knew your mother," she said quietly. "And your father. Anakin Skywalker."

Luke remained frozen where he was, Jedi Master and Apprentice still suspended midair with their boots dangling off the floor. His eyes were fixed on the Togruta woman though, the two Jedi fading back into the corner of his consciousness. "Give me one reason why I shouldn't kill you all."

"My name is Ahsoka Tano. Anakin was my Master during the Clone Wars."

The words slammed into him harder than any attack could have. He stared at her, taking in every physical detail and letting the Force drift out for the ones he couldn't see. Every syllable felt true, which was impossible. Father would have told him. Father wouldn't have….

"He was protecting you," Luke managed, tasting the words as they left his tongue to see if they felt right. He was such a tangled ball of emotions that he couldn't tell.

"Could you put them down?" Tano asked, motioning to Jarrus and Bridger. "They'll leave. This conversation belongs between you and me."

Luke didn't budge and Tano offered him a small smile that looked a little sad. "I promise, no one will hurt you here. We'll talk, then you're free to leave."

Slowly, Luke released the two. They didn't move immediately, but at Tano's look they finally turned. Jarrus paused, every muscle tense as he spoke. "We'll be right outside." Even though it looked like he was directing the words at Tano, Luke knew better. It was a warning for him.

The door slid closed behind them and he found Tano staring at him, her expression strangely shattered as if somewhere in the silence of their leaving she'd received the worst news of her life. Or, perhaps, she'd just let her guards fall. Whatever it was, Luke had to struggle not to squirm under her gaze. "What?"

"You look so much like him," she answered softly. "Younger than I knew him, but it's in the eyes."

Luke bristled a little. "My father has gold eyes."

"He didn't always." She pulled in a deep breath, letting it flow back out through her nose. "You asked if he was protecting me by not telling you about me." She waited until he gave a small nod of confirmation behind the meaning of his half vocalized thought a few moments before. "I'd like to hope so, but your father probably doesn't even know that I'm alive. We were on two separate missions when the…. when it happened. The cruiser I was on crashed with only a couple survivors. I… I knew something terrible had happened to him during that time, but I thought he'd been killed at the temple with the others."

Luke felt a flicker of irritation at the story Palpatine had allowed to surface about the fate of Anakin Skywalker. "He didn't die with those traitors."

Tano blinked at him, surprise melting into something that looked like pity after a moment. He squared his shoulders at the expression and she offered a smile before sinking to the floor, sitting cross legged and looking up at him. "What do you think happened, Luke? What were you told?"

A lifetime of warnings against anyone knowing who they were swirled in his mind. It was dangerous. If the galaxy knew Anakin Skywalker had survived, it would put his father in danger. Not that anyone had explicitly told him why. He had assumed it was because they would think he was a traitor like the rest of the Jedi Council. Better to be Vader than Skywalker after the fall.

But Tano already knew who he was, and despite being a Jedi herself, he couldn't feel any ill will towards him or his father. There was only affection and sadness and guilt.

"There's an old Jedi saying: The choices of one shapes the future of all," she said after a long moment. "I left him. I wanted to help a friend, so I left him when he needed me most. I've turned it over in my head for fifteen years. What if I'd made a different choice? What if I'd chosen to stand by him and fight by him and…" She closed her eyes, the guilt rolling off of her in waves.

Luke took a hesitant seat, mirroring her posture. "The Jedi betrayed the Republic," he said quietly, "and they betrayed him. One of them tried to kill him. He left him for dead and stole me."

"Who?"

"Obi-Wan."

Surprise flickered through her blue gaze. "Obi-Wan loved your father. He was his Master. He would never —"

"But he did," Luke bit out. "I've seen the scars. He left him to burn alive on Mustafar."

She pursed her lips, seeming to take the information in. Her silence felt like an unnatural weight and Luke squirmed a little under it, a question leaving him without permission. "What was he like? Back then?"

Tano's mood lifted a fraction. "Kind. And brave. Determined and absolutely devoted to the people he loved. I saw him risk everything again and again for what he believed was right." A soft smile touched her lips. "He called me Snips and he pushed me to be my absolute best. He's the reason I survived Order 66. I couldn't have done it without his training. Without him." Her gaze met his. "When I found out he was alive and that you had survived, I knew I had to meet you. I knew I couldn't abandon either of you again."

"You didn't know," Luke found himself saying softly.

"But I do now, and I want to help."

The teen's head snapped up at that. "Help? You want to leave the rebellion?"

"I won't join the Empire. Not after what they did. The Emperor is… he was always whispering in Anakin's ear, always influencing where he could. None of us saw it, and that's our fault. He was right in front of us and we missed him."

"If you're not joining us, what then? You can't help us."

"Are you happy, Luke?"

"That's a weird question."

"Is it? Does no one ask you that?"

"No."

"Are you?"

He thought for a long moment. He had his father, he had Mara, and he was on his way to becoming one of the most powerful beings in the galaxy, even if it was at the whim of someone else.

Tano gave a small shiver. "Do you know why the choices of one person can shape others' future? Each choice ripples out into the galaxy. Your father made a choice. I don't know why he chose to follow Palpatine, but he can make a new choice now."

Luke felt irritation bubbling up inside. "Do you think we could just leave, even if we wanted to?"

"Do you want to?"

"No," he answered automatically, but she didn't look convinced. He stood. "You said I could leave once we'd talked. We've talked."

Tano unfolded herself with less haste. "Of course." She rapped the door and it slid open to show what appeared to be an abandoned warehouse, the rebels he'd been hunting standing to the side. He started past her and she touched his arm. "I know you feel trapped. Maybe your father feels the same way. If you believe it's right, tell him… tell him I haven't given up on him. That I won't abandon him again. All he has to do is name the place and I'll be there. I'll get you both out."

Luke swallowed down the response, but if it was a promise or a curse, even he didn't know. All he knew for sure was that he had to get out of there.

—-

He had been dreaming when Jade had arrived, Padme's laugh filling his mind as they stood in the gardens of the Jedi Temple, a much younger Luke giggling and chasing Ahsoka around the Great Tree. She had stopped, spinning around and catching him, only intensifying the laughter. He'd looked so happy, but something dark had welled up in the boy's father's mind as he watched, despite the light that surrounded him, and the overwhelming feeling that his boy was slipping away had taken hold with it.

And now he knew why. He couldn't say why his old Padawan - long since dead from the Order his Master had set forth - was the face of the danger, but the mind often played strange tricks in sleep. What mattered was finding his son.

Jade had sparse useful information. A link to the money funding whoever had taken Luke, and even that she was hesitant to give up lest she reveal her hand and compromise her mark. Clearly she'd hoped that Vader could pick up on Luke's location like a tracker one might latch onto a ship. And perhaps he might have, but something was blocking him. Luke's presence was muddled. Quieted. It was as if something or someone was blocking them from that connection. All he knew for now was that he was alive, but even that could change quickly. That left Jade's local idiot that held vital information as their best resource.

"I'm responsible for the answers here," the teenager told him with more confidence than she'd earned.

"Your assignment matters little against finding my son."

There was a spark in her eyes. "You think I don't want to find him? If our Master finds that we threw away information on the rebellion for Natus, what do you think is going to happen?"

Vader held her gaze from behind the lenses of his mask, her logic infuriating, but also correct. Was he not always warning his son of being conscientious of the precarious place they held within the Empire under Palpatine? Clearly Jade was aware of it to, though anyone working directly under the Emperor was.

Jade pushed a breath out through her nose. "We'll get answers, but I'll bring him to you. If you show up at his door, everyone on the planet will know."

There was a long moment before Vader conceded. "Bring him to me."

The boy - Aurous, she called him - followed Jade to him like a pup on a leash. Jade played her part, all her well honed skills in emotional manipulation put to use. Skills he knew that she had and would continue using on his son. He shook the thought free as best as he could. Everyone had their own agenda, but she had brought this to him and he sensed she was willing to do what she needed to in order to find Luke.

Aurous rounded the corner and came to an immediate stop. Eyes wide and fear flowing off of him in waves that could have rivaled Kanino's, he tried with all of his might to scramble back the way he'd come. Jade blocked his exit. "Cooperate, and we won't hurt you."

"She won't," Vader boomed, his mask amplifying his voice as he took a heavy step forward.

He turned, expecting to blow through the petite woman, but she went low, blocking him with an elbow to the gut and a sweep to the ankles. He went down hard and she had already popped back up, one boot pressed firmly on his chest. "Who did Visra pay to take Natus?" Aurous jolted, trying to knock her off balance, and she shifted her boot to his throat, ready to apply pressure if he so much as twitched the wrong way. "That was a mistake," she told him coldly. "I'll give you one more chance. Tha name, the location. I want it."

"You work with them," the boy managed. "Why would I tell you?"

"Because death comes in many forms," Vader warned, "and I will have you screaming for it if you do not."

Aurous gave a nervous little laugh. "He'll be dead long before you find him. She's a Jedi. Even you can't stop her."

Vader crossed the space between them, his hand outstretched and Jade stepped back as he used the Force to haul him off the ground. "I am death to the Jedi." The boy went rigid as Vader reached deep with the Force, feeling Jade's disapproval on the outskirts of his awareness, but to her credit she kept her mouth shut. He dug and dug, working his way through Aurous' feeble attempts to think of anything else. He saw several young people - likely the ones funding the attack - speaking into a holocomm, but instead of a face visible in the projection there was a symbol. A symbol that looked remarkably like markings on a face he'd tried to push out of his mind for years. The same face that had filled his dreams that very night.

Aurous collapsed and Vader found himself in the back alley, Jade staring at him expectantly, her lips moving in a question he only heard the last of. "….apprentice?"

"What?" His voice modulator hiding the raspiness he felt behind the words.

"You said 'the apprentice lives.' Who is that?"

"No one that concerns you." He started past her. "He is yours to do with what you will. I have what I need."

"Like hells!" she snapped. "I'm coming with you."

"You have served your purpose."

"My purpose is to make sure we find him," she growled. "I'm not leaving him in the hands of whoever this is. You want to keep your secrets, fine. Keep them. They don't matter to me. Luke does."

She seemed to realize the slip in name the moment Vader connected that his son had told her. He felt the rage - the fear - well up inside of him and, even without lifting a finger, the Force closed around her throat with his command. She struggled and choked, but even then her glare was defiant.

And then her gaze shifted behind him and he heard "Father!" from that direction.

Vader turned, Luke's voice causing him to drop Jade. His son stood in the alley, a little disheveled and exhaustion hung off of him like a wet cloak. He gave a weary sigh. "I'd appreciate it if you didn't kill my friend. We have a lot to discuss."

—-

He felt like he was walking through a thick fog, his mind flipping through everything that had happened and everything that might as he walked through the night's events with his father. He listened, the mask hiding any visual emotion and Luke didn't have the energy to push against his father's mental barriers. There were no clarifying questions, and as far as Luke could tell his father recognized the Togruta woman's name.

When he'd finished, they stood in the private room inside the base. The silence was heavy between them. Mara had begrudgingly taken her mark into interrogation to see if she could pick anything useful up off of him after Darth Vader had left him unconscious on the floor of the alley. It was just Luke, his father, and an offer he'd relayed from his father's former Padawan. Finally, the silence became unbearable. "What do you want to do?"

There was a strange flicker in the Force around him, as if he were hardening his resolve. "If Skywalker's apprentice wants to meet, then I will go."

Tired as he was, it would have been impossible to miss the way he distanced himself from the situation. Luke had heard Palpatine refer to his father's true name as if he were an entirely different person, but in the decade he'd spent with his father he had never heard him choose that. Anakin Skywalker was Luke Skywalker's father, even if he were tucked away in a suite and behind a mask. To deny being Anakin Skywalker would be to deny being Luke's father. But this woman was Skywalker's apprentice, not his old Padawan. It was as if he weren't willing to claim her. As if it might be more than he could handle.

"You don't have to," Luke said quietly. "Go, I mean. She just wanted to talk. I didn't feel any ill will towards me or even towards you. She wanted….to give us a choice, I think."

"She is determined, and the choice you speak of is not one we can make."

"But won't we?" His father turned towards him and Luke could feel gold eyes staring at him from behind his mask's lenses. Or maybe they were blue. He wondered if they ever flickered back to their natural colour or if they remained Sith-gold. He shook the useless thought off. "Someday Palpatine will make us choose. We either end his life or he forces one of us to end the other."

"That time is not now. You are not ready."

Luke tried not to feel the pang of disappointment at his father's lack of faith in him. "Okay. If that's true, would it hurt to have allies that hate him? It doesn't have to be now. It could be a year from now. Ten years. But when we're ready, I feel she'd make a powerful ally."

There was a long stretch of silence that was filled only by his father's breathing. "When Jade is finished with her rebel, he will take the message to the Apprentice. I will meet with her." He turned to leave.

"Father." Luke waited until his father had stopped, though his back was still turned to him. "Promise me something if you must go: speak with her. Hear what she has to say. I can't shake the feeling that if you kill her, you'll never forgive yourself." Father had never lied to him. If he said he would, he would.

There was a harsh exhale of breath from the black mask and his father gave a sharp nod of agreement before turning to leave. Luke remained there for a long moment, turning the situation over in his mind and wondering if this might be the path to freedom.

When they had let Luke go, Ahsoka had resigned herself to the possibility of never hearing from him again… or from his father. The fact that Anakin was alive was still almost more than she could wrap her mind around. Even more so that he'd become Vader. She understood why Bail had kept the secret so close to his heart - both that son and father had lived - and she felt the same weight of responsibility pressing down on her. Even after the questions from both the Ghost crew and eventually from Commander Sato when an encrypted message came through that gave her coordinates where to meet. The name had been left off and she'd brushed it off as a vetted source. It wasn't a complete lie. Who else but Anakin would have her meet him on Mustafar where Obi-Wan had supposedly left him to burn to death?

Between the nuggets of information Luke had provided - much of it heavily skewed by the source, she imagined - and Bail's information from Obi-Wan himself, Ahsoka thought she had something of any idea what had happened, just not what had sparked it all off. Anakin had always been hotheaded, often at just the wrong times for the Order's liking, but the idea that he would have betrayed everything and everyone he cared about to follow Palpatine into the darkness didn't make sense. There was still a piece missing, and if nothing else, perhaps he could provide that to her. Though she couldn't help but hope that maybe he'd leave the Empire behind.

She had thought about tracking down Rex in his self-imposed retirement to ask him to act as backup. They had both been successful in talking clones down from the inhibitor chip programming and while the Dark Side was perhaps a bit more complicated, it still felt like brainwashing. A sickness that worked its way into the psyche and ate away at a person's logic and will until they bent the knee to Palpatine's demands. For all the times that they'd saved him, it was the former chancellor-turned-emperor that had caused the death and destruction of so many, many people she'd loved. If she weren't careful, she might find herself in a compromised as well.

In the end Ahsoka had gone alone. If things went poorly, Hera had the coordinates of Rex and the others' last known location and Kanan had been left with the promise of trust me in hopes that it could override the childhood trauma of Order 66 even if she couldn't be there with him to guide him through. She had to trust them - and the Force - that if Anakin was beyond her reach that they would carry on the fight. She couldn't leave him again. Not when he'd reached out. Not when there was hope.

She touched the shuttle down at the planetary coordinates that had been relayed to her and took a breath that didn't work to steady her at all. She felt like a bundle of nerves and guilt. She had to move past her emotions, though. That's what her Master had taught her.

He was waiting for her when the ramp unfolded out of the back of the shuttle. A towering figure in all black, face hidden behind a helmet and a control panel on his chest that indicated that it was the suit that was pushing air in and out of his lungs. The hot wind that blew off of the sea of lava behind him kicked up, whipping his black cape around. She steeled herself as she walked forward. "Anakin."

"Anakin Skywalker is dead," he boomed, his voice sounding nothing like she remembered, and the words sent a chill through her. What if Luke were wrong? What if Vader had lied to him his whole life, kept him near to corrupt him by telling him he was his father?

Fewer bonds were as strong as one formed between Master and Padawan. If this was Anakin, she should be able to tell. With another breath, Ahsoka reached out with the Force. For a moment, she felt a flicker of familiarity, even if it was beaten down by and buried under fear and anger and self-loathing. As her blue eyes slid open again, she knew. Not only who he was, but why he denied it. "I'm not a threat to you. Whatever happened, whatever… went down between you and Obi-Wan—" she felt the simmering rage spike at the name — "I'm not here to hurt you. I want to help you. You and Luke."

Power slammed into her, forcing her back. "You will not speak his name."

Ahsoka widened her stance, bracing herself. "I can't imagine what you must feel like you have to do to protect him in all of this, but Anakin…. Palpatine isn't the answer. You have to know that. We thought the Clone War destroyed lives, but Palpatine's empire has spread more destruction, more destitution than the war ever did. He's using you both for that, and that's not you."

"You should have remained dead," Anakin said, his voice sharp and cold, though she could feel the raging emotions.

"How could I with him using you like he is? I don't know what drove you to him, but it's not too late to make a different choice. For you and Luke." She took a careful step forward. "Think about what Padme would have wanted for your child."

Any crack in his emotional guards was instantly sealed at her name and it was all the warning Ahsoka had before his lightsaber flashed to life in his hand, a red blade rather than blue crashing down against her own white blades that reflexively crossed in front of her in a defensive position. She shoved him back hard, using the Force to send him skidding a few more feet. "I didn't come here to fight you!"

"Then you will die," he answered and lunged again.

Where Anakin's style had been quick and light, Vader's was heavy and powerful. Ahsoka felt her muscles strain as she parried, weaving and bobbing and eventually putting distance as she leapt into the air, barely clearing his swiping blade as she sumersalted over him. "At least tell me what happened!" she snapped as she landed, turning to face him with all the determination that he'd encouraged in her growing up. "If you're going to try to kill me, at least explain how it came this."

She caught his blade with hers and pivoted around, ducking another swipe, and she heard him push a harsh breath out through his mask. "You see destruction where I see order."

"With no free will. That's not order, Anakin. Palpatine has made slaves of an entire galaxy. You have to see that!"

He gave a sharp cry, the next blow powerful enough to send her stumbling. Her back hit the jagged rocks and everything in her screamed not to flip backwards out of his way as she might have done any other time. She listened to the instinct, rolling instead and getting a foot under her. Somewhere in their battle they'd inched closer to the edge of one of the cliffs, and if she'd rolled back instead of to the side, it could have easily put her over the edge.

The red blade swung out and Ahsoka leaned back heavily, her wide stance keeping her stable even as she bent backwards at a ninety degree angle. The hum of the blade buzzed in her ears and she popped back up only to duck low and catch him hard in the right shoulder with the hilt of one of her own weapons. Well, despite the rumours, he wasn't entirely machine. It was good to know that, even if only physically, there was a little left of her old Master.

Anakin snarled at the bluntforce blow and as he swung around to deal her one of the same - his with an arm she knew was made of heavy metal under the glove - and she jumped up, flicking her lightsabers off so that she could use his arm as a brace to gain the leverage she need to vault up, gaining higher ground. She stood on the jagged edge of the cliff and looked down on him, her own lightsabers still quiet at her side and her mind spinning until it came into sharp focus on a memory. "You saved my life, you know. All those years of training with Rex and the 501st. When Order 66 was enacted, it was your training that saved me because you demanded the most out of the people you cared about. Because my life was in your hands. No one else knows about Luke." A small lie, but one that needed to be told to save Bail. "I'm not going to hurt him. Or you. I am not your enemy."

Instead of lunging at her with all the rage he'd been fighting with, Anakin stopped. She did everything she could to quiet her own mind so that she could catch glimpses of the raw, pained emotions that were seeping through the cracks of his mental barriers. He turned and the light caught his mask's lenses at just the right angle so that she could see through them. He watched her, and while there was no physical change in his stance, she could have sworn his eyes had shifted to the old, familiar blue. "No," he breathed out the acknowledgement.

Ahsoka loosed a breath of her own, hope creeping back in.

"The Hand knows," he said, "and as long as I let you live, that puts my son at risk."

And with a flicker of his hand, hope flashed out of existence. Her mentor, her friend, her brother reached out with the Force and flung her from her perch, sending her over the edge of the cliff and towards the lava below.

----

Mara found him on the roof of the base, and for just a moment it felt like they were ten years old again, hiding out on the Palace's landing pad, Coruscant stretching out below them. But this wasn't Coruscant and there was no hiding from what had happened. By using her contact as she had, she had burned the bridge to Visra without gathering the information she had needed and it was only a matter of time before that became abundantly clear. And if he didn't know already, it wouldn't be long until the Emperor discovered that it had been to save Luke. She had tried to walk that line between the assignment and protecting her friend and by failing one, there was a chance she'd failed both. Only time would tell how the Emperor reacted.

There was an air of sadness that hung on him since his father left, something like guilt following at his heels as he moved. If it was because his capture had disrupted so much or something else entirely, Mara had no way to know. Since Vader had left the planet, Luke had tucked himself away with little interest in anything else.

Until now.

The moons were rising over the horizon and he must have felt her approach, even if he didn't move. Mara eased herself over the lip of the wall surrounding the roof and took a seat with him, both gazing out into the distance. In the silence, it was harder to clamp down on all the questions she had.

"I can't promise you an answer, but I can promise not to lie," he offered without breaking his focus.

Mara swallowed hard, sorting through the long list. "Why did they let you go?"

"To deliver a message."

"Which was?"

Luke's chin dropped against his chest. "I can't tell you that. All I can say is that Father is…. dealing with it."

"He knows the person who took you." That gained her a sideways glance. "He called them the Apprentice."

"That's not a question."

Something in her screamed not to ask, but the investigator in her needed the answer. "Who is it?"

Blue eyes turned back to the horizon. For a moment she thought he was thinking it through and searching for the right words, but as seconds turned to minutes, it became clearer and clearer he simply wasn't going to answer.

"Okay. Do you know?" she ventured.

There was another long moment before he loosed a breath. "I know what I was told, but…. We're never told everything, are we?"

"What do you mean?"

"Sometimes I feel like there are these huge gaps… Like I'm still that sheltered kid that only knows what he's told about the outside world. They're stories that could be true or not, but even after leaving the Palace, I don't know if I know what's true."

His shoulders slumped a bit more and Mara frowned. Despite everything - his training and the life he lived - there was still a light to him. Not everyone was allowed to see it, but it was there. He couldn't and didn't hide it from her. To hear him sound so lost in that moment, so uncertain, hurt. "I don't know who I am," she confessed softly, her own carefully guarded truth the only comfort she had to offer. "I can't remember my parents' faces anymore or much about my childhood. I couldn't tell you when I came to live at the Palace, but…" She reached out slowly, her palm covering his hand that was braced against the permacrete of the roof wall. He turned to look at her again. "But I do remember meeting you."

He stared at her for a moment, a sense of awe battling for a prominent position in the raging emotions he was projecting out without care. Then, without warning, he leaned in, his lips pressed against hers. The kiss was quick, but it sent a warmth flushing through her system. As he started to pull back, Mara reached up with her free hand, fingers curled around the back of his neck and she pulled him in again. He melted into her and she could have sworn time stood still.

A sharp coldness cut through the air and they flew apart to see that they were no longer alone on the rooftop. How Darth Vader of all people had managed to quietly sneak up on them was anybody's best guess, but there he was, and if an emotionless mask could look unhappy, his did.

"Father," Luke managed, swinging his legs around to stand. Mara followed suit, not wanting to give Vader the chance to accidentally toss her off the roof to her death below.

Vader's attention turned to Mara. "Your assignment is complete. Visra funded a rebel named Ahsoka Tano and now she is dead."

A strange twinge of sadness flickered from Luke before he caught it, but his father turned to him. "She lied to you, my son. Like her Master's Master before her, she attempted to kill me. In the same way, she met her end."

The Apprentice. A Jedi's Padawan. Perhaps someone that Vader had killed. That made more sense. Not why he was holding it all so close, but another dead Jedi in his wake was nothing unusual.

Vader turned, growling out a harsh "Come," to his son with the expectation the order would be obeyed even before he started walking.

Mara turned back to Luke, his expression strained. "What?"

"Like I said: sometimes it's hard to know what is true." He tried for a smile. "But you are."

He turned before she could answer, following after Vader. Things were set right and for the moment they were safe from her Master's wrath, but that didn't help ease the pain of him leaving again.

"And you," Mara answered softly to the empty rooftop, but it was Luke. He had a way of knowing.

----

TBC

Notes: Look at awkward teen Luke finally making a move! Why not add a romantic entanglement on top of all of the other chaos in their lives now?

Originally the last chapter and this one were supposed to be one, but I'm glad I decided to split them because this one turned out to be over 7K long. Go figure. Hopefully there are no complaints. Writing the Vader vs Ahsoka scene from Ahsoka's POV was also not something I'd planned on and I'll just be over here crying in the corner for a while now.

I hope everyone has a very Merry Christmas this coming weekend and a fantastic New Years the next if I don't chat with you before then!

Next Time: Luke and Vader's assignment takes them to Alderaan.

#star wars #star wars fanfiction #Mara Jade #Darth Vader #Luke Skywalker #Ahsoka Tano #A Flicker of Light

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