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#(which is also a sex thing)
butchfalin · 6 months
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the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again
#yeehaw#1k#5k#10k#posts that got cursed. blasted. im making these tag updates after... 19 hours?#also i have been told it should say speech loss bc nonverbal specifically refers to the permanent state. did not know that!#unfortunately i fear it is so far past containment that even if i edited it now it would do very little. but noted for future reference#edit 2: nvm enough ppl have come to rb it from me directly that i changed the wording a bit. hopefully this makes sense#also. in case anyone is curious. though i doubt anyone who is commenting these things will check the original tags#1) my friend did not do this on purpose in any way. it was not intended to distract me or to hit on me. im a lesbian hes a gay man. cmon now#he felt very bad about it afterwards. i thought it was hilarious but it was very embarrassed and apologetic#2) “why didn't he use 🫵🏼?” didn't exist yet. “why didn't he use 🆗?” dunno! we'd been using a lot of hand emojis. 👌🏼 is an ok sign#like it makes sense. it was just a silly mixup. also No i did not invent 👉🏼👌🏼 as a gesture meaning sex. do you live under a rock#3) nonspeaking episodes are a recurring thing in my life and have been since i was born. this is not a quirky one-time thing#it is a pervasive issue that is very frustrating to both myself and the people i am trying to communicate with. in which trying to speak is#extremely distressing and causes very genuine anguish. this post is not me making light of it it's just a funny thing that happened once#it's no different than if i post about a funny thing that happened in conjunction w a physical disability. it's just me talking abt my life#i don't mind character tags tho. those can be entertaining. i don't know what any of you are talking about#Except the ppl who have said this is pego/ryu or wang/xian. those people i understand and respect#if you use it as a writing prompt that's fine but send it to me. i want to see it#aaaand i think that's it. everyday im tempted to turn off rbs on it. it hasn't even been a week
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scribefindegil · 6 months
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When you encounter a person who does not do something that you consider normative, you need to understand that they could be either stating a barrier or expressing a boundary. A barrier is "I would like to partake of the normative activity, but I can't due to other factors." A boundary is "I have made a decision not to participate in the normative activity."
Many people do not believe that boundaries actually exist! This is why it's so common to give a clear "No" on an issue and get inundated with people saying "But have you tried-" They can't conceptualize that anyone might actually want to avoid X thing, so they assume that you totally want to do X and you would love X so much if only they could figure out a way around whatever pesky obstacle is getting in your way. But humanity contains multitudes, and for any given experience you consider vital for happiness I promise there are people who are Just Not Interested.
If someone is stating a boundary, do NOT talk about how sad their life must be, and do NOT try to push them! Just accept that their life experience is very different from your own, and isn't that a beautiful thing?
Barriers are different. Barriers suck. With boundaries, the only problem is other people being dicks. With barriers, the problem is the barrier itself . . . and probably, additionally, people being dicks. There's really not a way to win in the people being dicks department when you don't do something that other people have decided is Necessary For Humaning.
If someone is talking about a barrier they face, still don't talk about how sad their life must be, although it's fine to commiserate with a friend if they're complaining. It's hard! Some barriers are pretty insurmountable; the person might not ever get to do X even though they want to. And a lot of people don't believe that this kind of barrier exists either; we're very much taught that you can do anything if you try hard enough, when that is simply not true. If someone tells you that they can't do something, listen to them and respect that.
The only reason for not doing X that people really acknowledge as real are the surmountable barriers. And these are real, but even in these cases you should always assume that the person knows themself best and not give advice unless they've specifically asked for it. But if they have asked, it's chill to try to brainstorm solutions with them.
As someone who has both things going on, it really sucks that people tend to assume that everything is a) a barrier issue and b) that they personally have the solution to it. Don't do this.
The only way you can tell if something is a boundary or a barrier is to listen to people and believe them.
Example:
If you offer someone a drink and they say, "No thanks . . . I haven't really found anything that I like yet," (barrier, potentially surmountable) it is probably cool to ask them if they're open to trying something new, and if they say yes ask about their tastes to try to find a drink they would enjoy! They might like it or they might not.
If you offer someone a drink and they say, "I can't, it interacts with my meds," (barrier, insurmountable) you can say, "Aw, that sucks!" and offer them something nonalcoholic.
If you offer someone a drink and they say, "I don't drink," (BOUNDARY) you should give them a mocktail and shut the fuck up.
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schizodesires · 6 months
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your sister's trying on new outfits. however, she keeps asking you for help. each time she calls you back into your room you groan in annoyance, getting up from your desk to sulk next door. and each time you lean against the doorframe and go "yea dude its looks fine" but youre realizing a trend. each outfit is more skimpy than the last, and she asks you to help her put on and remove her clothes more frequently. and you know you shouldn't..you really, really shouldn't. but each time you find your hands lingering just a little longer as well. taking her pants off slower than usual. fingers looping her bra straps. all of this until one outfit sets you off. something occurs in you, youre only thought is "I need her". the thought is loud and repeating, echoing, pounding in your head. your hands begin to shake as she bends over, exposing her ass straight towards you. she's oblivious, searching through her pile of ever growing clothes. you can take her right here, right now. quickly cover her mouth so she cant yell. get her on the ground, wrestle with her. afterall, why else would she be calling you into her room for trivial bullshit like this, wasting your time, pissing you off, flaunting herself in front of you. you can hear your heartbeat in your ears..she turns around, sees you lunge at her, and quickly yelps before you can subdue her. she's yours.
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horsegirlhob · 3 months
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Season 6 Buffy really just needed someone to give her good information about kink and BDSM and shit I'm not saying it would solve all her problems but I do think it would help with several of them.
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gayvampyr · 2 years
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“queer spaces should be inclusive of people who don’t enjoy sex and who have “strange”, negative or repulsed relationships with sex” and “sex is an important aspect of lgbt community, history, and activism and queer people should be allowed and able to talk freely about sex without stigma or shame” are ideas that can and should coexist.
#‘queer people were banned from and shamed for having sex and that’s where a lot of our activism stemmed from’ and#‘not liking or having sex is considered abnormal and a mental illness and also needs to be destigmatized’ are concepts that not only can but#often do coalign#it’s esp important to consider that a lot of lgbt ppl who have a tricky and strained relationship with sex are like that because of trauma#which is very common for queer folks#it’s really not an ace-only thing#like i am sex repulsed but it’s very hard to discern if it’s because i’m asexual or if it’s the trauma. either way i deserve to have those#feelings and be included in lgbt spaces and discussions about sex and treated as just another queer person with a different experience#instead of being alienated because my feelings about sex don’t directly line up with yours#im so sick of people in this community trying to pit us against each other. as an ace lesbian that shit is so toxic and harmful#my relationship with sex is fluid. im sex-positive always‚ but i often find myself sex repulsed. im otherwise neutral about it but im sick#of people acting like it’s either you enjoy sex and have it frequently or you hate it and you shame everyone who has it like youre a puritan#and it’s often aphobes who bought into that ‘aces are puritanical celibate straights who want ppl who have gay sex to die or think they’re#‘dirty’ or some shit. and it was literally 90% crypto-aphobes pretending to be aces to get people to adopt that into their belief system#the same way crypto-t/rfs pretend to be trans women who want to prey on the ‘innocent women’#and y’all will use those posts/screenshots as ‘evidence’ that whatever scapegoat you’ve selected is actually inherently bad/homophobic/#misogynistic/etc and not even#acknowledge the giant hole in your logic cuz you’re too busy trying to find a scapegoat#it’s the same tactics and y’all fall for it every time#text post#like. lesbians are CONSTANTLY getting hounded and told that we’re broken or mentally i’ll for not showing interest in (having sex with) men#for the same reason asexuality is considered bad or wrong or weird#not showing interest in heterosexual relationships or sex is why this is so important#anyone that falls outside the scope of heterosexuality is part of this community whether you like it or not
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80yearoldmanmoodboard · 8 months
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Some gems from the Autobiography of Special Agent Dale Cooper: my life in tapes
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communistkenobi · 4 months
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I’m thinking about how administrative leave requests would work in starfleet and it’s gotta be a huge pain in the ass right. vulcans would probably need a special expedited leave request process for pon-farr, because they become violent/die if they don’t excuse themselves to have sex asap, but this is probably a narrow accommodation only granted to vulcans, so if they were dating a non-vulcan who had to go through normal, slower leave request procedures that would cause logistical issues cuz emergency pon farr admin leave only works if both parties can do it at the same time, so if you’re a non-vulcan dating a vulcan you would have to probably apply to get that accommodation extended to you, and because I’m assuming starfleet operates on the same punitive logics as contemporary bureaucracies do, they’d be paranoid about non-vulcans “cheating the system” by falsely claiming they were dating a vulcan to get their leave request expedited, so they’d probably require proof of marriage or long-term cohabitation with a vulcan in order for a non-vulcan to get approved for that kind of thing, meaning casual or otherwise non-normative vulcan/non-vulcan couples in starfleet would be administratively marginalised and (re)produce a culture deriding interspecies dating, especially because humans seem to be kinda default racist towards vulcans in star trek in general, so they would probably view a human dating a vulcan as getting “special privileges” for administrative leave even though it’s just a basic accommodation. this is a classic example of how administrative apparatuses operating on a liberal conception of equity can reproduce systems of racial discrimination
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aroaessidhe · 8 months
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2023 reads
The Spider And Her Demons
YA Australian urban fantasy/horror
about a Malaysian-Chinese girl who’s half spider-demon, just trying to keep her head down and survive high school
when she accidentally kills and eats a man in front of the most popular girl at school, they strike up a strange friendship and she starts to learn more about herself and the supernatural world
aroacespec/sapphic ish
#The Spider And Her Demons#Sydney Khoo#loveozya#aroaessidhe 2023 reads#you give me a teenage girl with giant hair spider legs who scuttles across her bedroom wall on page 3#and then eats a man and i am already sold.#also aus books are always so familiar compared to US books :)#and yes sexuality stuff is ambiguous but basically: a bunch of discussion on relationship hierachies (ie friendship equally/more important)#themes of feeling unlovable bc you're different and different forms of love#multiple times the MC says she has no interest in dating or relationships and also is touch (and maybe sex) repulsed#- but of course that Also has to do with the whole Being A Monster thing#and it definitely shows some kind of attraction to dior - ie looking at her lips/bare skin; blushing; etc#and ends on sort of hand kiss / 'is this something??' vibes#I asked the author and they said they see them as QPR / platonic soulmates but are not at the point where they would know what to call it#which makes total sense to me!#the part of me who wants more obvious aroace YA wishes it was a little more specific#but also I DO love ambiguity and I think it wouldn't be true to the characters#who are clearly not even ready to start figuring that stuff out.#and also. aroacespec sapphics is like. also something i want#also like. I think it's reductive to assume just because 'looks at lips' is a common allo attraction trope....doesn't necessarily mean#it has to be that. yknow.#anyway. i loved it a lot.#gross spidergirl (affectionate)......#also dior is such an interesting and complex character. like another book could have made her nicer or less fucked up
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b4kuch1n · 1 year
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the king shunned, the lion dead, the knight lost, the princess absent. but the wizard lives.
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roomy-ghosted · 9 months
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My feelings towards ao3 this morning.
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suffarustuffaru · 3 months
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hi i made a tier list of how homophobic rezero characters are
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hello in the spirit of valentine's day and the very welcoming community here on rezero tumblr i decided to make this with the help of my lovely mutuals.
#anyway heres some fun little explanations if youd like to read:#otto has. so much internalized shit going on i dont even know where to begin. not as severe as like subaru fr and def not in the same way a#whatevers happening with ferris but like by the time u get to arc 8 hes a total shitshow LJSLDKF#like ottos. transphobic. canonically. with natsumi schwartz. and then hes def got More going on bc his attachment style is soo....#wilhelm and heinkel i think would def be homophobic outside of reinhard/reinhard related things but its funnier to describe it like that ok#and either way the main target of their homophobia is gonna be reinhard LMAO#oni elders suck ok. theyd all be homophobic#rams got a strong case of comphet rn but when she doesnt have comphet shes chillin with subarus gf and having wlw mlm hostility with subaru#and otto. the entire judges your taste tier is all insane teen girls or frufoo and patrasche (who DEFINITELY judge otto and subarus taste)#frufoo patrasche are like that one reddit post about that one guys dog being homophobic after seeing their owner get topped in gay sex#also als in that tier bc al.#alcor is technically subaru but he gets to be a tier lower than subaru bc. hes also not technically subaru its very complicated but#at least he doesnt have the entire boy drama subaru has LSJDF#reids iconic line is the ones where he calls julisuba boyfriends u know. its extremely iconic.#a dear mutual of mine has informed me tivey is in lol ok while his triplet siblings wouldnt know what being gay is which LKJDSLFSD thats#fucking funny i had to do it#id argue satella is in lol ok bc she lets subaru do almost anything ok. this includes being terribly into men. she knows shes got his heart#either way. and also elsa dont care unless it affects how ur guts taste#rems reaction is gonna be lol ok unless its subaru coming out to her. then shes gonna have some Mixed Feelings#rezero#re:zero#i forgot to add but u could def argue garf knows what being gay is bc his two older brothers are just Like That#but also neither of his brothers would be caught dead explaining what being gay is to him
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dyketubbo · 4 months
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i remember seeing someone call tubbo a fully grown adult at 19 (obvs before he turned 20) and i gotta say. i think maybe some people have a really skewed idea of what constitutes as "fully grown". and also what constitutes as properly mature. thinking that at 18/19 (or hell even at 20/21) people are now fully grown and mature is insane to me like yall thats how you get people thinking their life is over at like 23 and that 30 year olds are senior citizens 😭😭 be fr
#this is a problem no matter where you look but i think a lot of ppl in the mcyt fandom esp seem to think once youre-#-considered an adult at all that it automatically means youre fully grown and mature and thats just nooottt really true for most ppl#which i think can lead people down to sort of dangerous paths especially because 'adult' is often defined by age of consent#and theres also some slight cultural differences like even just between the us and the uk where due to 18yr olds being able to drink in-#-the uk (and other places) i think it genuinely causes some dissonance#where i see often in the us that when youre 18/19 youre still treated (id say rightfully) as being rather young and not Truly a grown adult#hence. yk. the term Young Adult#but i think in places where the drinking age is younger it starts causing people to see younger people as more mature#which is also why a lot of predators like to push for the age of consent to be at a younger age like 15 or 16#and why many lolicons try to point at japans age of consent (which for the record is complicated and not as simple as just 'age of consent-#-is 13') as a defense for how they act#because these sorts of milestones (having sex and drinking) are seen as marks of a true adult. which gets into a whole lot of other#complicated things#and often dangerous things and ways of thinking#ANYWAYS . basically 18/19 isnt fully grown 20 is also hardly fully grown itself#and theres ways to combat people infantilizing tubbo and other creators his age without acting like hes actually#fully grown and mature lol. i promise you humans are not fully grown at 20 years old are you kidding me 😭😭😭😭#if youre in your 20s you still have a lot of time and space to grow i promise. do not fall for the idea that your life is done by like 23#idk. im only 18 myself but it just feels insane to me that if i were a creator people would be calling me a fully grown adult#not that im not an adult but i dont think im mature enough to be seen as fully grown and i guess itssss. sad?#to see other people my age think that turning 18 means youre fully grown. just really not true#theres a lot of 30 year olds who still see early 20yr olds as being practically babies we have Not made it to full maturity yet i prommy#mask mews
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the-daily-male · 6 months
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Today's daily male is Dionysus from Greek Mythology!
for @weaselkiddo
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kyouka-supremacy · 4 months
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Tangentially related to the last Beast sskk post, just something that has been going through my mind A LOT in the last period:
There's this tendency I see of characterizing post-Beast sskk as being on very bad terms with each other, keeping on hating each other even after Dazai's death, and I personally can't relate with that interpretation. To me the canon Beast sskk development is, more or less, a warming up to each other speedrun. All the issues they used to have, about being on opposites sides, about having contrasting ethics, were already sorted up in canon, violently and unmercifully, but most importantly thoroughly and definitely. I find it very easy to believe they'd get along post canon, because everything they had to sort out between them, they already did fully.
When I say that Beast sskk is more or less a warming up to each other speedrun, it's also in the perspective of Beast sskk being a general speedrun to what sskk are in the canon timeline: because I do believe sskk's is a progression towards warming up to each other¹, and in a lot of ways it's already visible in canon, through Atsushi helping Akutagawa in the cannibalism arc despite allegedly hating to work with him, through Akutagawa dying so that Atsushi could escape, through Atsushi wearing Rashomon and Akutagawa letting him wear it and everything that entails. The thing is, when it comes to them, Beast sskk have already seen each other bare; they HAVE seen each other at their lowest point already. If there ever was a peak of hate between them, they've already reached it, and that means the tension is only going to plummet from there. There's nothing left for hate anymore, only for understanding and compassion and love.
“More or less” of a speedrun, that is, because honestly? Beast sskk never needed to warm up to each other, because they didn't start from hating, wholly and sincerely, each other like their canon counterparts did. Beast sskk started from a place of common ground, of genuine sympathy and liking for each other. When they started fighting, I think they were both pained from having to fight each other, who shortly beforehand they had found so easy to relate to and most importantly who they felt understood from. If they hated each other at some point - which, everything accounted, is still realistic, especially given the threat they both posed to their little sisters and more generally to their weaknesses and insecurities -, all accounted it was still brief (literally. didn't last more than half a day), and likely easy to leave behind. In the end I just think for Beast sskk it's going to be easy - spontaneous, even -, to go back to the warm acceptance and understanding they shared on their first meeting; because, differently from their canon counterparts, they know that in normal circumstances they get along, and that's something they can't lie about to themselves and pretend it's not true. They can't lie to themselves about hating each other like canon sskk do; so really, Beast sskk is left no other choice than to get along.
As a final note, I think it would also be easier for Beast sskk to get along because Beast Atsushi doesn't feel to be on an higher moral pedestal like his canon counterpart does, so a lot of moral conflict between Atsushi and Akutagawa simply doesn't happen in Beast.
¹ In a way that, for comparison, skk aren't, who remained more or less frozen on the stance of “hating you (that is also loving you)”. Regarding that, I agree with the interpretation of canon some people offered that the manga is the story of sskk's progression, while skk's relationship is already fully developed.
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This month I have watched two different female-led, Frankenstein-inspired movies and surprisingly enough, the more feminist one was not the critically acclaimed one.
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acequeenking · 3 months
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Fandom: Tekken
Relationship: Kazama Jun/Mishima Kazuya
Rating: Explicit (this one has sexy times so not for kiddos)
THIS IS POST TEKKEN 8. BIG TEKKEN 8 SPOILERS. DON'T READ IT WITHOUT FINISHING THE GAME UNLESS YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT SPOILERS.
Additional Tags: Reunion, Reunion sex, Vaginal Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Awkward Conversations About Not-So-Accidentally Trying to Murder Your Son and Actually Murdering Your Dad and Kind of Accidentally Abandoning Your Unknown Baby-Mama, Forgiveness, Getting Back Together, Dealing with the mental fallout of Tekken 2 to Tekken 8, which for both of them is...a lot, but they're getting there
"I am not the man you want me to be," Kazuya admits. "But that does not mean the man I am does not love you."
"...Still?" Jun asks, the word the only thing that can quite get out of her throat.
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