#🦋binge

[caffeineaffection]

I love the feeling. I love the tired eyes and the stomach pains, the shakes while running on nothing but caffeine and a few cigarettes. The feeling of being hungry. When friends say "I've barely eaten anything today." and knowing I ate less than them for once. "Do you want this, I'm not hungry?"... the demonic thoughts inside my head are telling me to say no. But I say yes... why can't I just be like them?

#🦋tw #🦋rant #🦋4n4 #🦋pro #🦋poem #🦋spo #🦋meanspo #🦋binge #🦋fat

[foxyslide]

🦋DIARY🌸

TW mention of ed

TW mention of ed

TW mention of ed

Fri 10/06/22

height: 163cm

Sw (for this diet): 57kg

cw: 54.9kg

hw: 70kg

lw: 52kg

gw: 47kg

ugw: 45kg

yesterday..

breakfast: fasting

lunch: fasting

dinner: peri peri chicken (literally just chicken hubby loves to eat this shit 😭 no veg at all!!) 450g 810kcal; buttered toast 116 x 3 348kcal (soooo many calories for sooo little satisfaction..); chocs 54 x 12 (don’t remember how many hubby mixed up the wrappings with his ones before I could count so I’m guessing) 648kcal

= 1,806kcal -_- no fruit or veg, I need to eat separately from hubby

Cycling:

16.8 miles, 1,008kcal burned

BMR:

1,806 - 1,268 = 538kcal intake 

I gained a kilo from yesterday’s dinner. I was 53.9kg when I came home from cycling, I was feeling so good and light, feeling great about my body, and now I feel shit, ugly, fat, and my fucking stomach is rumbling. I lost my ana buddy (we both have b.e.d so not ana but that’s what ppl call it and that’s how we found each other.) it was helping me sooo much to have her, she was the sweetest. Hubby said that he would be my buddy from now on but his first day has been a failure instead of helping me restrict he said I should eat, finish my food, stop complaining, not to worry I will loose the calories cycling which is true, but I’m not looking to maintain my weight I’m looking to LOOSE weight. He’s honestly a shit buddy lol 😅, I’m pissed at him and at myself for just going along with what he said instead of removing myself from the situation and hanging out by myself until he finishes to eat, which is my plan for today. He did help me with looking up the calories and calculating them but because he’s not worried about loosing weight himself he got frustrated/bored very quickly about the topic, and I want to talk about it because it’s important to me. So I’ve messaged him I’m gonna look for another buddy online, or hopefully find my previous one! 🤞

Also fair to say I’ve completely failed the diet I was on!! I will try again once I find a new buddy 🌸

#Foxyslide #Flowerolling #🦋binge #🦋 #🦋ed #🦋b.e.d #🦋b.e.d buddy #tw b.e.d #b.e.d #4n4 buddy #4n0r3x14 #🦋diary🌸

[02bunnygirl]

pretty self explanatory lol

#mental ill meme #eating disoder things #mental illness #ed relapse #pro recovery #relapse #ed recovery #ed vent #ed relatable #bing3 #b1ng3 #binge #ed humour #4n4 meme #4n4rexia #4na #4n0r3x14 #4n4 #🦋ed #🦋 memes #🦋 vent

[coolbeans852]

i LOVE food but hate calories and being fat. the struggle is real

#an0r3xic #anorexsick #ed diet #i want to be th1n #not pr0 just for myself #th1n$po #4norex1c #ana trigger #anor3x1a #e 🦋 #eating problems #ed binging #not pr0 anything #only pr0 for myself #pr0 ana diary #pro 4na #skiny girl #th11nspo #th1nz🎀 #tw ana thoughts

[pseudorexic]

if only I'd lose pounds the way I'm losing control over my life smh

#🦋humor #ana #ed vent #ed meme #just ed things #starving #fat ana #fatass #self hate #mia #body dysmorphia #self harm #depression #anxiety #restricting #binge eating disorder #bingepurge #tired #🦋diet #🦋.txt #🦋check #bones #tw depressing thoughts #tw ana related #not pr0 just for myself #overweight ana #fat and ugly #thinsbo #skinny #underweight

[berry4-pie]

💜 Purple Mealspo 💜

If you eat then don't eat fast food.

💜 Block don't report 💜

#th!n$piration #thinspø #st⭐️rving #weight loss diet #i need to lose this weight #stop binging #tw ed but not sheeran #ana meal #mealsp0 #tw skipping meals #4n4blr #4n0r3xia #@na motivation #@nor3×14 #🕯️as a feather #🦋log #🦋diet #🦋diary

[floating-away]

I had been doing so well in my progress and restriction and then my sister made brownies and my fat ass ate them. I’m so disgusted with myself. I’m a failure.

#@na vent #🦋rant #🦋tw #@n0r3xia #light as a feather #pro @na #pro a4a #pro4ana #3d diet #@tw edd #ed blogg #ed not ed sheeran #ed not sheeren #ed bullshit #just binged #tw b1nge #b1ng3 #fear food

[mxnd-infxction]

already been having a sucky day bc of classwork and then realized i w31gh3d in at 114.6 this morning so i was close to my 1st gw, and i b1ng3d on like 10 of those stupid twist and shouts

so done with today :(

#logged it anyway #however #i've been real good with not binging lately (finally 💀) #even though my mom bought a bunch of junk food that's still sitting in the pantry #and a box of the sams club naan bites #like alrighty yall have fun w that lmao #listening to some 90s house rn tho so i feel a bit better about today #i just want to be thin #pro for me not for thee #🦋tw #🦋goals #low cal restriction tw #a4a diary #ana bllog #ana rant #4n4rexia #4n0rexic #kcal counting #ana calories #tw ana shit #i wanna be skinnier #tw disordered eating #i need to lose this weight #ed behaviour tw #tw ed but not sheeran #an@rexi@ #@nor3xia #4n4blr

[bb-butterflyyy]

I’m honestly to the point where I don’t even care if I’m at my ugw by summer, I just wanna be out of the 150’s 😢

#I do so good but then I binge and all my hard work and suffering was for nothing #my heart is tired of this #ed tw #🦋diary #tw ana diary #bb-butterflyyy

[skeletonrxle]

#4na #i wanna be sk1nny #lose weight #weight loss #only pr0 for myself #🦋 vent #not pr0 mia #i wanna die #ana relatable #stop binging #tw ana thoughts #🦋meme

[foxyslide]

🦋DIARY🌸

TW mention of ed

Looking for buddy, no coaches and no minors DNI, preferably with B.E.D, only looking to update once a day as i work and am married, if you’re looking for more interaction I’m not the person for you I won’t have the time. Message me if interested 🪴

age: 28 height: 163cm

Sw (for this diet from monday): 57kg

cw: 54.9kg

hw: 70kg

lw: 52kg

gw: 47kg

ugw: 45kg

🌸

#Foxyslide #Flowerolling #🦋4n4 buddy #4n4 buddy #4n0r3x14 #4norex1c #4n4 blog #4n4m1a #4na blog #b.e.d #tw b.e.d #tw mental illness #tw ed relapse #🦋binge #🦋 #B.e.d buddy #🦋b.e.d buddy #🦋b.e.d #🦋adult b.e.d #🦋adult 4n4 #🦋diary🌸

[concavebelly]

when your relative tells you to watch what u eat if u want to keep your figure

#pro 4na #fuck eating #i hate food #4norexia #stop binging #lose weight #tw ed relapse #skinnysp0 #skinnyyy #skeletal #edblrr #i want to be th1n #th11nspo #ed diet #pro mi4 #meanspø #nicespo #4na meme #e 🦋 #🦋goals #🦋humor #🦋check #🦋diet

[coolbeans852]

my bmi is 23 and i need to be 18 to be “underweight”

😭😭😭

#an0rexx #an0r3xic #anorexsick #ed diet #i want to be th1n #not pr0 just for myself #th1n$po #4norex1c #ana trigger #anor3x1a #e 🦋 #eating problems #ed binging #not pr0 anything #only pr0 for myself #pr0 ana diary #pro 4na #skiny girl #th11nspo #th1nz🎀 #tw ana thoughts

[pseudorexic]

I don't know what it is about recovery that just makes me wanna relapse even harder than the last time

...probably bc I'm way too fat to deserve recovery

#body dysmorphia #ed vent #fat ana #overweight ana #fatass #bones #ana #mia #just ed things #bingepurge #binge eating disorder #🦋vent #🦋.txt #🦋diet #🦋check #🦋 #e 🌧 #🌧.txt #depressed #self harm #disordered eating thoughts #ana vent #ana trigger #ana things #ed twt #anxiety #addicted #starving #best way to lose weight #lol jk unless

[littlemangoprincess]

My toxic trait is that I binge with no brain cells.

No thoughts just shove down as much food as I possibly can.

And after the binge I'm like 👁👄👁 how much did I just eat? I am going to freaking explode!!!!

#not pr0 just for myself #3atingdisord3r #tw binge #🦋humor #🦋 vent #🦋.txt

[doodlingmywaythroughlife]

HOW THE FUCK IS THIS POSSIBLE

Tell me I’m not the only one who wants shoulder bones showing like that wtf

#ed not sheeran #not pr0 4n4 #4n4 diet #c 🌧 #ana stuff #4n4 buddy #4n4 vent #binging #th1nspiii #🦋ed #bts thinspo #th1n5p0