#< that’s just my tag for original posts btw

[epersonae]

Director's cut of "For The Benefit of All the Broken Hearts", please! (p.s. - is it annoying if I send more than one of these? I have Curiosity)

I saw that it was for the whole fic and I just [stares into space] - because not only is it 62,158 words, which is a lot of words, for me anyway, but it also is one of those stories that occupied my entire brain for months on end, and is still kind of a core part of my personality. I could probably do a whole Taika-commentary-track-of-Boy thing with it, and be equally weird and revealing. 😅

But in trying to pick out a single aspect to write commentary, I realized I've never written the post I've been threatening to write for a year (WHAT), which is what I learned about writing an unnamed protagonist. (Or at least I can't find anything in the #carlita coded content tag.) It's now been a year, so it's likely I will miss something important, but it was such a striking learning experience that I think I can do pretty well with it.

This got long, so more under the cut:

Because aside from being obsessed by the subject matter and vibes and all that, writing for the benefit of all the broken hearts was an incredible boost in my writing craft. (the other big boost was around dramatic pacing and narrative tension and foreshadowing, btw.)

She didn't have a name in the original, and deliberately so, and I was committed to that in my work. See also: Rebecca; this post's tags has some thoughts about Rebecca as a narrative influence in addition to the technical aspects. And unlike Rebecca, I was writing in close third person. (One of the reasons that when I'm feeling particularly cocky I will say SUCK IT DAPHNE DU MAURIER.)

And that's not that hard to do when there's only two characters in a scene and they use different pronouns, but so much of the story is her and Mary. (this post made me laugh A LOT) Which means I can't use pronouns to do the lifting, instead I had to think about other ways to handle it structurally.

Using Mary's name probably more than I would normally, to be quite honest. Her name is in many more dialogue tags and starting actions than I think it would be otherwise, because if Mary's doing one action, she's doing the other action; if Mary is saying one bit of dialogue, she's saying the other.

Using line breaks strategically, clearly separating character actions; and I think over time this actually made a difference in distinguishing how they act (and speak) differently from one another, that carried over to her interactions with Ed and Stede as well. And that carries over to how Mary also becomes a more distinct character.

In some cases, this went as far as actually rearranging the physical action. I don't remember the precise details, but there's something about when they first go into the kitchen in Ch 15, when Stede is making drinks, where you have all four characters directly interacting: I reworked who was doing what where to disambiguate which "she" I'm talking about.

There's also a lot of very fiddly sentence rewording, rethinking every individual sentence, and does every clause need to be there, and what is every single sentence doing. Because there's a lot of ways of writing that are "natural" (aka I have been writing fiction off and on since I was probably nine years old, and even with a wholeass English degree and a lot of supplemental reading about craft, I'm still kind of intuitive about my writing) that lead to structures where clearly her name would go here, but I can't do that, so: is the sentence working? Should it get flipped the other direction? Do I need a paragraph break? Is it okay if it's a little ambiguous -- there's a line in one of the coffeeshop scenes where it's kind of unclear which one of them does some gesture or another, and I decided that the ambiguity worked, actually.

And then probably my favorite craft becomes theme trick, particularly where there's sort of a repetition of sentence structure, or where Mary has been doing something and her actions are in reaction to that: sometimes it makes it work to just remove the subject of the sentence. Walks across the room. Picks up her coffee. It both somehow makes things clearer despite offering less detail AND reinforces this thematic thing of her being both absent and present.

Bonus difficulty level, btw: even if epithets had made sense for the tone (which they did occasionally, iirc), I deliberately chose to have very limited physical description of both her and Mary, on account of them both being amalgams not of actor and character (like Ed, Stede, Jim, Roach, etc), but of either two real people and real person and character played by a different real person respectively. They are both entirely secret third thing, and giving them things like hair color/style (beyond a vague reference to length) or eye color takes that away. (Instead they have some details of their overall physicality - age, respective heights - and clothing, both of which also tie into the themes of the thing.)

Honestly, overall it was an interesting creative puzzle, and I learned a ton -- Through the Storm, which is a very very very different story, owes a lot to it, and I've managed to commit to the bit through all the missing scenes fic (altho since a lot of that is alternate POV, there's a lot of "Ed's wife" construction, which is not my favorite) and the alternate bad endings fic.

tagging the beta team in case anybody has anything to add; this was very much a group project, esp in identifying places where it was clear to me but not to other people: @emi--rose @veeagainsttheday @gaypiratebrainrot

also, going to leave this here - when I went to ECCC in 2023 the original artist of this meme was selling versions with a blank word balloon and you could have her write in something, and I got it left blank with the idea that I would write other things on the plastic or if ever get a glass frame, but uh, it's been Carlita? since March of 2023.

there's so many other things I could have written about at this length about this story (both specific details and the thematic stuff), I'm serious.

and to answer your ps: NOT ANNOYING AT ALL. clearly I enjoy talking about my writing. :D

[director's commentary asks]

#ask games #my writing #my fic #carlita coded content #btw I decided to omit her name from this post - for the bit - and had to put a few of my tricks into play #sometimes you write something that changes your own brain chemistry I guess

[116t98]

🩷 K/DA | CODE: PINK {icons and in-game designs} 🩷

Original tweet @yoomyoomm: https://x.com/yoomyoomm/status/1693322112897851821?s=61&t=7n4ok9xOfxpHb2LMS8hhbw

Original tweet @yoomyoomm: https://x.com/yoomyoomm/status/1693322082795307025?s=61&t=7n4ok9xOfxpHb2LMS8hhbw

(Additional vfx details are also in this thread btw)

#kda #k/da #code: pink #code pink #fanart #league of legends #k/da akali #k/da ahri #k/da evelynn #k/da kai'sa #kda akali #kda ahri #kda kai'sa #kda evelynn #these icons are so cute oml #mine #< that’s just my tag for original posts btw #I wasn’t involved with this project #blade art

[canon-gabriel-quotes]

These will just keep getting worse, btw.

#if you saw the original. no you didnt. #anyway. #i still didnt add the weirdo freak clip but i posted it separately so thats good enough for me lol #i'll just copy the tags #this was all for the normal clip btw. inhuman sound. i needed to share it. worst sound of 2022. #but sharing is caring which means you all have to share my suffering thank you. #thank you minos for all your hard work. #suggestive #video

[pepper-steam-milkshake]

HI YES okay so i got incredibly inspired to make this on MULTIPLE levels, and after releasing an okay-looking chuuya sketch, i wanted to make something a little nicer. SO! ghibli art-style howl au skk @sensitiveheartless 🥹 i wasnt kidding when i said this au lives rent-free in my brain; this was a really fun exercise on a lot of levels between practicing a little different rendering, trying out the ghibli art style, and fun dynamics :3 hope you're having a good day/evening, and that this treats you well!

#original post #my art #bungou stray dogs #bsd dazai osamu #bsd nakahara chuuya #soukoku #THERE WAS A TAG. WHAT WAS THE TAG #CRYING #ykw its 12 am im not gonna get too pressed over it 🥹 #sorry about the spam btw i just have;;; had a burst of inspiration #which is honestly fantastic #BUT i genuinely hope youre doing well and all that jazz :3 #im gonna... yeah i think im gonna sleep now

[spider-man-2o99]

individual stills of miguel Scampering on all fours and showing off his more distinct individual movement style (that he has because of his spider-man's Similar-but-still-distinctly-Weird-and-unique powers as compared to the more-graceful Others) so that i don't have 2 keep rewinding the clip(s) to see it. im REALLY excited to see him scuttling and skittering all over the place in the film just like he does in the comics-- and, like, seriously, Miguel Specifically being just. made Massive for some reason in his atsv design will never NOT be funny to me hes SO freakin Bouncy why did they Do That.

don't be Weird on my post or i'll kill you for real

#talking tag #atsv #across the spiderverse #spider-man 2099 #spiderman 2099 #miguel o'hara #the question is rhetorical btw i am not actually asking that in earnest. #i Already Know the reason why. #many different combined factors that came together to simultaneously make one of his Best designs and ALSO make My Life hell. #but. sigh. anyways. it's really genuinely been bringing me a lot of joy to see this kind of loving attention to detail. yknow. #god. mig never Gets That yknow?? christ. forget abt the stupid Freaks for a second. hes a c-lister. an alternate costume in a game. a Cameo. #a side character who gets a couple lines of dialogue At Best and then his entire universe is rebooted nine zillion times Again and hes gone. #and marvel only ever brings him back to choke the life out of whatevers left #so.. Yeah. that he is going to feature so prominently in atsv IS actually kinda a big deal to me! i KNOW it'll never happen again! #i dont believe in posting while Angry which is why i have not been making as many Original Posts lately but. just. god. #im not like Actually A Danger 2 anyone im just hyperbolizing out of Frustration but #oh my FOD #there r some ppl on this site that i just want 2 kill with my teeth while screaming the whole while like a howler monkey. lordt.

[idliketobeatree]

#good omens #ineffable husbands #good omens poem #good omens poetry #supreme archangel aziraphale #crowley #aziraphale #good omens s2 #post s2 #good omens s3 #good omens season 3 #ineffable divorce #ineffable spouses #aziraphale x crowley #go2 #original poem #marcela writes #my own tag still scares me. i am so shy about writing! but i also really wanted to post this so. closing my eyes and hitting send #i'm always happy to hear criticism btw i just need to calm down ahaha

[metaben]

aright so this is what I'm talking about

guys there's literally no reason to put stuff like this in the tags lol!

for those who may not understand tumblr culture: character specific tags are utilized mostly by FANS of the character to discuss the character, search out meta, or look for art and fic.

it's considered bad etiquette to post character hate into the tag for the character. but with characters who have a lot of people who hate them (like Emp), this is very hard for us to self-police. it's especially annoying because it can lead to the tumblr algorithm placing these posts directly into our timelines because of how they're tagged.

literally every day we see a handful of the exact same post:

[screenshots of Emp with someone's character.]

caption: god I fucking hate him I'm going to kill him soon grrr!!

even ignoring the bad-etiquette part of it, you're basically just spamming the tags with a post that's been made 1000s of times?

it's not at all conductive to building discussion or community.

squidfuckers are gently requesting you all stop doing this lol.

#fandom #fandom etiquette #bg3 #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 emperor #the emperor #even if you hate the emp or think he's evil this is just childish and creating a crappy environment for his fans #other morally ambiguous or straight up evil characters have more welcoming tags than this #I'm gonna need you guys to start thinking about the fandom environment you are fostering by excessively hating a bunch of pixels #this post showed up on my timeline btw #I wasn't even in the tags #stop tagging these as the emp's tags we are begging you lmao #this goes for all the hate and snark you think you're so super original and edgy and cool for #keep it on your blogs/personal tags #and out of the community

[deoidesign]

IF YOURE LOST YOU CAN LOOK AND YOU WILL FIND ME

TIME AFTER TIME

IF YOU FALL I WILL CATCH YOU ILL BE WAITING

TIME AFTER TIME

#whoops accidentally posted this on the wrong blog #theyre trying to promote time and time again but they messed up the name #its okay theyre doing a good job #time and time again #ttawebcomic #webtoon #webtoon originals #adam and steve #drawing #my art #digital art #digital drawing #whatever I hate tagging stuff #nyooooooom #lets fucking gooooooo #theyre so cute #these tags are all just for me btw I expect like 0 people to read them #but if you do #hiiii omg hi #welcome to my twisted tags

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Life update Life advice. Go Bald and be free.

#non mdzs #Everyone was very nice and supportive about my new baldness I mentioned in the tags of last post. #And originally I was going to keep it in the tags exclusively for The Bit. #But your support has emboldened me. Now it's public knowledge. #I will still be baldposting in the tags until I'm no longer Smooth. #Showers are great btw. I have never felt so clean. #I worry for sunburn but I can just wear a hat! #My little cat guy would feel like warm raw chicken.....Things to think about. #Hair holds to many awful secrets and you can be free from it all by just going bald!

[colin-robinsons-cardigan]

Kind of gay to want to stake a vampire. I mean, why do you, as a man, need to put something inside another man so badly?

#original post #vampires #vampire #gay vampires #thakn fuck thats a tag #this is about andercard btw #actually you know what #andercard #apologies to my irl friend who just followed this blog #hi hannah regretting your decision yet?

[charlesemersonwinchesteriii]

#garashir #inspired by some garashir fanfic tropes that are BELOVED by me <3 #obviously this argument is just for funsies like two kittens playfighting #they would turn into goop and merge with each other like changelings if they could #Star Trek: Deep Space 9 #today I offer you: little joke posts that only I find funny. tomorrow? statistically speaking probably the same thing. #a/b/o gave us the concept of ''can't pull out cause of the knot'' but I want a version of that from the pussy perspective #tired of the top always getting to decide these things. my idea is we're done when the ajan says we're done. #actually it's garashir so more likely it would simply be garak lying #''Sorry doctor you can't pull out because of Cardassian xenobiology reasons :( no I will not explain anything further about this btw #but it's DEFINITELY a medical necessity and not me being a freak I prommy <3'' #Starky's Original Posts #text post photosets #hm. not seeing heaven for these tags I think.

[cancerian-woman]

It could be(it is) from TVDU’s racism but you would think that after Davina’s death and Kol’s rants on being ignored in the family he would’ve sided with Marcel and not against him..

#sat in my drafts forever lol #let’s hope i don’t regret tagging this #stopped caring to tag my thoughts for awhile #marcel gerard #the originals #kol mikaelson #this wasn’t a anti post for either btw lol. I’m just offering some perspective.

[116t98]

🩷 K/DA | CODE: PINK {splash art} 🩷

Original tweet by @emriikun: https://x.com/emriikun/status/1693322036100100398?s=61&t=7n4ok9xOfxpHb2LMS8hhbw

#kda #k/da #code pink #code: pink #fanart #league of legends #kda akali #kda ahri #kda kai'sa #kda evelynn #k/da ahri #k/da kai'sa #k/da evelynn #k/da akali #I originally came across these pics in someone else’s post #but it was just a screenshot of the original tweet​ (along with a link ofc) #I thought it’s be easier to view as individual images so here they are #mine #< that’s just my tag for original posts btw #I wasn’t involved with this project #blade art

[noweakergirl]

dare I say... superior trope

#lover gone dark #p.s. for those who don't know sasusaku actually has a happy ending I just love angst #(another fun fact! in the original rots idea padme was meant to kill anakin) #the first and the last quote is from vampire academy (if you know you know) #at first I wanted to make it all about my favorite characters who either went dark or were nearly there (like sam winchester) #but then I decided to go down 'if your beloved goes to the dark side you must save them by either bringing them back or killing them' road #me shipping sasusaku since the age of 10 and then discovering anakin when I was 20 has brought us where we are today btw #being a within temptation stan as a child didn't help either #I love me a story of a good man who has too much power and gets corrupted on his way to revenge mmmm delicious #I don't know how to tag this post cause it's a bit niche but I hope my soulmate people will find it <3 #sasusaku #sasuke x sakura #sasuke uchiha #uchiha sasuke #sakura haruno #haruno sakura #naruto #naruto shippuden #boruto #pro sasusaku #(obviously) #star wars #star wars prequels #anakin skywalker #anidala #vampire academy #otp: irreplaceable partner

[quarks-pussy]

[Images description: Twelve pictures of Star Trek actors. The phrase "thank you for being both amazing actors and amazing people" is written across most of the images one word at a time, except for the two images in the middle. The middle images are of William Shatner, reading "not you!" and Robert Beltran, reading "or you for that matter". The actors in the other images are George Takei, René Auberjonois, DeForest Kelley, Gates McFadden, Wil Wheaton, Kate Mulgrew, Patrick Stewart, Siddig El Fadil (aka Alexander Siddig), Nichelle Nichols and Leonard Nimoy. End image description.]

Non exhaustive list of course. Many more such cases, in fact feel free to add

(insp)

#i considered putting sid's full name in the image description but i felt that might complicate things for screen reader users #but just so it's in the post i'll put it in the tags #siddig el tahir el fadil el siddig abdurrahman mohammed ahmed abdel karim el mahdi #yes i did copy paste it my memory is shit. i can't even remember my own full name... #(i gave myself like five different middle names at one point because if i'm already changing my name for trans reasons i might as well have #fun with it right but eventually i stopped using them because i literally kept forgetting my own name and had to look it up) #(i still have the note btw and since it seems i won't legally be using that last name anyway (nor any of the middle names) feel free to ask #anyway #star trek #not star trek #(schrödinger's post lol) #oh!!! i forgot one version of sid's name!! here goes #صدّيق الطاهر الفاضل الصدّيق عبدالرحمن محمد أحمد عبدالكريم المهدي #to be fair there's nothing in that tag (right now) but i guess i'm a completionist. or something #the others are ofc already findable because of the image description #oh and just fyi if you wanna add others do feel free to add new trek actors. i didn't include any here essentially because as soon as i inc #include one of them people are gonna complain i didn't include more of them. plus i ran out of space. sorry tawny #oh and to that one anon: i WILL still answer but i needed a break lol #original posts fresh from quark's pussy

[kittylordinfinity]

As someone who used to watch james somerton before he released his helluva boss video (a video that praises a show that has been openly misogynistic, biphobic, and just generally weird about its treatment of queer and other marginalized people, for supposedly being an ICON of queer representation or whatever the fuck) i am mentally writhing like a little piglet in joy at the new hbomberguy video

#hbomberguy #james somerton #and btw this isnt meant to attack or belittle anyone who was a fan of his before the hbomb video #the average viewer had no way of realizing he was a plagiarist #and from personal experience i know it can be hard for a casual fan to notice the more wack rhetoric he uses about some identities/groups #his pretentious ‘smartier than thou’ way of making videos #made it really easy as a young queer person to feel like i just didnt understand points he made that i found suspicous or offensive #until i got a signal that made me reexamine the rest of his work under that lense #bluhhh conveying thoughts is hard #kittyposting #<<this is my original post tag now. btw