alexwizard

[alexwizard]

the fact that op turned off rbs is very very funny to me. anyway i want this post on my blog too.

[alexwizard]

"if you're a work of art, i'm standing too close, i can see the brush strokes"

-phoebe bridgers, icu

[alexwizard]

"Hasrat hi rahey to Acha hai, chand hasil hojae to chand kaha lagta hai"

#chand #eid mubarak

[alexwizard]

Suna hai bohat barishein hain tumhaare shehar mein? Zyda bheegna mat, Galat fehmiyaan dhul gayi, toh ham bohat yaad aayenge.

[alexwizard]

Suddenly feeling very lonely today. Almost like when the only thing to look forward to is myself, I don't want to do it. Also I am reminded of him. Kind of missing him. But in no way would he have helped any of my problems. So I am also reminded of all the dark phases i went through. All that I put up with. Countless of conversations on changing. Innumerable breakups and patch ups. Ultimately what I think I mean is, when someone/something makes you dream in a time when you are hopeless, you make it your everything. Even when it is not even close to it. You forget the numbing pain and anxiety they gave you. All because the few seconds of dreaming were beautiful.

#lovers #relationship #writers on tumblr #blogging #girlblogging #winter #depressing shit #breakup #heart break #heartbroken #narcissisticgaslighting #imagination

[alexwizard]

“stop traumadumping to your friends tell this to your therapist” my god they paywalled human connection

[alexwizard]

day 12 without my dad, I’ve decided i’m going to write a list of some of the new things i really hate:

I hate riding in the car

I hate those split second moments when i go to show him something or call him or look for him before i remember that he’s gone

I hate seeing my mom so broken

I hate talking about him in the past tense

I hate nighttime

I hate the question “how are you doing?”

I hate Teslas

I hate the passage of time

I hate funeral arrangements

I hate not knowing where he is

I hate how long it takes to get a death certificate

I hate Intensive care units

I hate the guilt i feel when i have happy moments

I hate that lump in your throat tightness in your chest feeling

I hate that he’ll never get to turn 50

I hate that to him i’ll always be 18

I hate that i wasn’t awake when he left that morning

I hate the “5 stages of grief”

I hate the thought of birthdays and holidays without him

I hate how he’s everywhere in every corner of my life but also nowhere

I hate the half drank can of fizzy water on his desk that he’ll never finish

I hate that this happened to him of all people

[alexwizard]

“I believe that when you lose someone you don’t necessarily learn how to live without them. You don’t have to. You build your life back up around the cracks they left. Around the gaping abyss in your heart. We’re so scared of letting go and moving on, of finally being happy - even years later - because a tiny part of us still thinks we’re supposed or expected to be grieving. The best thing we can do is to look for traces of the people we lost in every place we can think of, in their favourite songs, in photos, in everyday life - whenever we feel like they’re close. Don’t stop looking for signs. In the end it doesn’t matter if they’re really signs or coincidences. As long as we feel their presence in these signs, there is no reason to stop believing in them. We can choose to remember the beautiful memories. The funny ones. Those who make us forget we were ever sad in the first place, only lucky to have had them. To have had the chance to spend a fraction of our lives with them. We can keep them alive through conversations. Maybe we don’t have to let it all go in order to move on. You can always keep the parts that matter.”

— the parts that matter / n.j.

[alexwizard]

There is a pain of longing in your path,

It kills but you stretched out your heart.

A blank canvas that you've been staring at,

Pieces of the war won laid out flat.

Now I think mostly how to win another,

So brutal that we lost sight of each other.

Let bygones be bygones in the name of wind,

New flowers shall grow in mud of spring.

Deepest secrets that no one knew,

Destined to be strangers again anew.

Passerby's would know you as a tragedy,

The wretched soul grown so raggedy.

I won't try to let them know the spells,

What I've learnt is a cast of my own hell.

#relationship #my poem #poems and poetry #original poem #poems on tumblr #poems and quotes #poem #actually narcissistic #forbidden love #lovers #hurt/comfort #hurtquotes #original post #blogging #literature #desi tumblr #writers on tumblr #books and reading #back and forth #taylor swift

[alexwizard]

having to come to terms with the fact that love is not an everlasting performance in which you attempt to retain the attention of your significant other but rather a release of control and putting faith into them and trusting them to choose to stay with you no matter what you have to offer

[alexwizard]

Cursed emoji stimboard

[alexwizard]

[alexwizard]

[alexwizard]

ideal hangout i invite 2 talkative and funny friends over and listen to them talk to each other

[alexwizard]

I want someone to look at me and say “is pagal ke bina mein pagal ho jaunga”

[alexwizard]

hello kitty would never get a buccal fat removal

[alexwizard]

Which color of the sky do you love the most?

Tumblr I'm begging u give me the polls...