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#you see a smart person would wait to post
sysmedsaresexist · 2 days
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I spoke with Colin Ross again.
The original post, for those who missed it.
This is going to be really disjointed and rough. I've been put in a really weird position and I want to just... talk about it. This is okay to reblog, I'm sure there's pro/endos that have been waiting for this. Unfortunately, it's going to be attached to a vent.
Sadly, talking to him brought up a lot of bad feelings. I'm still so sad to see so many people turn on me. I'm disappointed that there was so much pushback. I'm disgusted by people's hypocrisy.
People wanted to know why I wasn't posting my side of the emails to Colin Ross, they tried to say he didn't believe those things anymore.
So I emailed him again, recapping our previous conversations, and asking him if he still believed in non traumagenic plurality.
And he responded that he does.
I thought I could post it, and that would be the end of it. Proving we had spoken before, confirming the topics discussed. But in my email to him, I shared what I've been doing since I last spoke with him, what prompted me to reach out to him again. The same thing that stopped me from posting my side of the emails originally. I wasn't entirely honest with him, either. I don't think I would have gotten a response if I had talked about tumblr.
And I'm simultaneously so excited and so scared.
This is a man that, in a very vague sense, formed a mentor/professional relationship with me. Our interaction overall was brief, but it was exciting to discuss his work with him, ask him questions that had been bothering me-- I told him about myself, my educational and work background. I used my real email and name. My real school. He's Canadian, we talked about it. I shared real details of my life, and while it wasn't necessarily in confidence, I don't think he would appreciate knowing that I've shared his personal thoughts and emails on tumblr, of all places. I'm not lying or hiding anything in my side of the conversation.
I'm scared.
I'm terrified to post anything that could be linked to me. Even posting this, I'm like, "can people like... reverse edit my picture and get my email?" I genuinely don't know.
I worry about posting the full screenshots with his email, knowing people won't believe me if I don't, but not wanting to have these ridiculously immature people in his inbox. I have encouraged people since day one to find his email themselves and reach out. I figure that the only people who would put in that work are the people who genuinely want to learn.
But then I realized that there are people that could ruin the relationship I made with him.
People that could make it so that I can never contact him in this way again.
People could use this to find me, if they get Colin Ross talking. (The rational part of my brain says he's smart enough not to give someone else my name, but goddamn, some of you people are actually dangerous)
There are people that want to do that to me. People that hate that I even brought a professional into this conversation. And I get it. I sat on the original conversation for almost three years, remember?
It's really scary to admit you're wrong, that you've been close-minded and hardheaded. It's scary to confront your bias and actions.
But having him respond to me... I feel so lucky? Not that Colin Ross is a saint, but how often do you get to meet someone like him? How often do you have a chance to take advantage of a professional contact that seems willing and happy to have these kinds of conversations with you? Three years later and he remembered me. He took the time to answer me, again.
I don't want to fuck that up.
So I thought about reaching out to certain people, showing them the entire set of emails without any blockout and having them vouch for the authenticity.
Then I realized that I wouldn't trust any of you anti endogenic systems with any of my information after how you've all behaved.
And I realized that none of you are going to change your minds, no matter what I show you, and I'd rather to maintain my professional relationships than put any more effort into any of you.
And I know if I wait too long to post this, people will call it fake, so I either need to go ahead and make this post or just kind of let it disappear into obscurity.
It's so important, though.
Isn't it?
I can't tell anymore.
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landograndprix · 1 year
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Birthday boys ✾ l.n
summary: reader celebrates the boys by personal messages, some might enjoy it more than others
requested: yes!
follow up (sorta) from this post
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y/nusername
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liked by danielricciardo, heidiberger, landonorris and 7,824 others
y/nusername happy birthday to the one and only love of my life! Honestly feeling bad for the people who don't get to have a best friend like you– i'm so happy we got to grow up together and terrorize the neighborhood and everyone in our way. I love you babes even though you set me up on a date with your weird coworker. also thanks for the job, sorry you got fired before me ❤️
tagged: @/danielricciardo
view all 826 comments
dannyricric lando & heidi who? I only know daniel & y/n
tifosiredbull the first and the last picture 😭
leclerccc_ the last one is too cute!!
danielricciardo can't wait for your birthday babes, got the pictures ready
y/nusername shaking in my boots right now
teammclaren 😂 😂 😂
landohnorry the first one is doing it for me tbh 🤣
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y/nusername
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liked by alex_albon, mercedesamgf1, georgerussell63 and 8,723 others
y/nusername don't be down and turn that frown upside-down. Happy 30th birthday to the most British man I've ever met– crickey, you're getting old. Best wishes from one bad bitch to another bad bitch 🎂
tagged: georgerussell63
view all 812 comments
grussell63 what is this and why is this the best thing I've ever seen? 😭
georgerussell63 why are you like this?
y/nusername I ask myself that question at least ten times a day 🥰
maxiel13 put this on my grave please :')
mercedesamgf1 truly iconic 🙌
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y/nusername
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liked by isahernaez, carlossainz55 and 9,076 others
y/nusername older? yes. wiser? debatable. Some things are better with age, too bad you aren’t one of them. Happy birthday to my favorite spaniard 🌶
tagged: @/carlossainz55
charlos55 ah yes I love the Jonas Brothers
y/nusername joe is my favorite obviously
charlos55 asjklsas i love you!
scuderiaferrari thank you for perfectly capturing our chili 🌶
gaaaslyyy happy b-day to Carlos and let's thank y/n for her services ☺
carlossainz55 I can't wait to see you on the track this weekend
y/nusername is that a threat?
carlossainz55 keep your eyes open
sainzie my goal in life is to be as close with every driver as y/n is 😭
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y/nusername
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liked by landonorris, alex_albon and 8,003 others
y/nusername happy birthday to the guy who can never do anything wrong in his life, the guy who became the little brother I've never had, thanks for being such a great time. (Don't be fooled, I still like your girlfriend more.)
tagged: alex_albon
view all 307 comments
maxmaxmax he truly can't do wrong, protect this men at cost!
🤺🤺🤺🤺
alex_albon thanks y/n, it's okay I too like my girlfriend more than you 😀
alebonooo like you should 😇
lilymhe hey could you intruduce me to this guy, he's cute
alex_albon 👋👋
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y/nusername
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liked by charles_leclerc, danielricciardo and 10,897 others
y/nusername Smart, funny, beautiful..but enough about me, happy birthday to monaco's (and my) favorite. Here’s to another year of questionable fashion decisions. Happy birthday queen. ♥
tagged: charles_leclerc
sharllekler not charles questioning his life in these pictures 😭
lestappen_ I would too if my team was ferrari 💀
leclerc16 bestie the least thing you could've done was take those pants away from him
y/nusername friend if this man wants to embarrass himself, who am I to stop him?
charles_leclerc thank you queen ❤️
checooop don't known if I want to be charles or y/n
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y/nusername
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liked by landonorris, carlossainz55 and 9,726 others
y/nusername Happy birthday to the guy who always knows how to make me laugh, who matches my weird, to the most good-looking guy I've ever met, to my best friend, to my person and to the one I love. I hope i get to spend many more birthdays with you..anyway, who needs a gift when you have me? Love you always, muppet 🧡🧡
tagged: landonorris
view all 910 comments
norris4 the difference between the birthday post of the other guys and lando's one is insane 😭
mercmartin the last picture will always be my favorite, thanks for sharing it once again
landonorris love you, muppet ❤️
Bottassv will I ever get over the muppet thing? Probably not
danielricciardo best friend?
landonorris people change their minds, daniel
scottyjames31 feeling rather betrayed right now
y/nusername guys please, I can't stand y'all equally. No need to fight.
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on-leatheredwings · 2 months
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Checkmate
Yandere! Tim Drake / (AFAB) Reader
> romantic, rated M > tw/cw: yandere-typical behaviors (obsession). M rating is for a boner. just some sexual tension. reader is mentioned as bisexual.
> summary: Intellectually, Tim falls fast. Romantically, he falls hard. Seems this time it's both. > a/n: i just wanted to post some tim practice, pls let me know if i did okay. I made him a bit of a fuckboy i guess but ngl i think tim’s just run through af 😭 > word count: 1268
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Tim likes you. And knowing himself, soon, he’s going to really like you.
More than anticipated, too. He didn’t think he’d have much of an opinion at all on you, when you had first met on your first day, in your new position as his personal assistant.
Personal assistant. 
At the reveal, he exchanged a hard look with Bruce across the room. Tim Drake had not been slacking on the job. And sometimes he had the eye bags to prove it.
Tim hadn’t even said anything yet, when you chirped, “Think of it as delegation.”
You gave him a pleasant, albeit cheeky look – which he respected. If you had the qualifications and enough charm to impress the hiring manager, who was a notorious hardass in interviews, you were probably fine. Probably more than fine.
Either way, he expected to forget your existence until you texted or called him to remind him about meetings he hadn’t forgotten about.
It turns out, you had… personality. Probably more than you should’ve, working in the professional setting of Wayne Enterprises. You dealt with Tim’s shit (absences, excuses), but gave as good as you got (ultimatums, thinly-veiled blackmail to run and tell Bruce). You were also… very attractive. And clever. And smart. And insightful.
And God, he wonders if you have a boyfriend. Or girlfriend. Partner. And he wonders if he can somehow orchestrate a breakup. 
Tim moves a chess piece across the board. 
Okay, maybe he’s being too hasty. 
Oh, for the love of– you know what? No, he isn’t being too hasty. Anyone working in such close quarters with the heir apparent of Wayne Enterprises is heavily vetted. But it’s about time he did his own background check on you. He has made it three whole months without doing so. 
See, he really is getting over his control issues. Eat that, Stephanie.
Okay, if he’s going to entertain the idea of courting you– Wait, wait, since when was it courting? Yeah, no. He’s merely entertaining the thought of you. He’s been burned too many times now to start courting.
Let’s talk about having sex first before we start talking about dating, he jests with himself.
Anyway. He wonders what would be the most interesting means of going about this. Coming out and confessing would be a little boring. Too easy. His eyes wander to your lips. You’re too focused on making your next move to notice him ogling the soft swell of your chest beneath a sharp button-up. You’ve rolled up the sleeves – very casual for this very casual hangout. You both lounge on your bed, in your bedroom, in your apartment, because if Tim wins, you don’t get to hound him on personally contacting investors. (Sometimes, you gotta leave malcontents out to dry. Make them miss you.)
He hopes you like being experimented with. Or maybe you like experimenting on others. He would do anything you liked because, man, it’s thrilling to know people and their wants. Anything you give, he could take it–
Tim startles as a realization comes to his mind. 
… Him. Taking it.
Is that something he wants? To bottom for you? … Is that something… he wants? 
Yes.
Now that the idea has been conceived, yes, he wants that. So that’s that. 
The reality of whether you’d want to do that… is slim… maybe? You’re bi as well. Maybe that changes things. He’s not going to think about it too hard, because now he’s getting excited.
Tim would love for the skittering, synapses-firing-on-all-cylinders effect in his brain to cool down – for everything to wash over with cool calculation and academic interest. He manages to do that much for even the most intriguing cases. But you… Tim sighs.
And now he’s hard.
Tim shifts uncomfortably. He’s lying on his stomach, held up by his forearms. 
He sighs, even though there’s an evil piece of his brain snickering and taunting, “But you love this, though!” Evil, evil.
At Tim’s increasing silence, you lift a brow. Man, he’s been out of it all game.
“Tim?” He comes back to planet Earth. “It’s your move. Again.” You wear a Cheshire grin. “It’s almost like we’re taking turns, or something.”
He blinks, baby blue eyes clearing up. He shifts in his spot, feeling trills of pleasure from friction against erection. Your sheets. Against his erection. He bites back a smile. Okay, yes, he loves this. He likes hiding like this, right under your nose.
Him getting a boner was a development he had foreseen coming ten minutes ago, once he started daydreaming about you. So he just went ahead and casually switched positions. A risk, but a calculated one. He was pretty sure there’d be no reason for him to get up and expose the tent in his jeans. And boy does he love it when he’s right.
Tim goes to move another piece, when he glances up at you and nearly goes slack-jawed. You don’t meet his eyes. Instead, you wet your lips, seemingly meditating on something.
You meditate on him. After all, Tim is so… pretty. Pretty in a way unlike the rest of his gorgeous brothers. He has pretty eyes framed by dark lashes and a smaller frame, though he’s deceptively muscled under the clean-cut slacks and button ups. He has silky black hair that often falls into his eyes; a defined jaw. And pale skin. He is notably the palest in his family, burning miserably on beach days. It is that pale skin, contrasted so sharply with his dark green tee, that brings your eyes to his collarbones.
Tim nearly erupts.
Fuck, yes. He caught you staring. It takes him self-restraint not to puff out his chest or try to show more skin, lest he reveal his hard-on.
You snap out of it only moments after he notices, grin returning to your face.
“You know if you lose focus like that, I’m going to win,” you tease, almost childlike mischief in your expression. 
Tim so badly wants to parrot the words back at you, but he doesn’t want to scare you into never checking him out ever again. The little inch you just gave him– oh, he intends to take a mile. Whatever small acquiesces you give in the future, he knows he’ll take that and much more.
Now, he’s hungry for you. As soon as this game is done, he’s going to create a new case study file, just for you. He could start kicking his feet at the thought, he's that excited. He’s excited! 
He’ll put the pedestrian, basic stuff like your height, weight, alma mater, major, past jobs and experiences. Somehow get into your social media that’s all on private mode to see what you’re always laughing at on that damn phone. He’s also going to bring up your phone records, go through your email, go through your physical mail. Oh, fuck, surveillance. He’s already in your room, too, luckily. If only he had more of his bugs on hand… The ones he always keeps in his belt buckle will do for now. Also, Tim needs to think of some way to acquire your breast, waist, and hip size – he has a good idea of those measurements, but he wants to know. When is the next time you’ll be out of the house and not at work, he wonders–
“Tim,” you whine, impatient. The sound is music to his ears.
Tim’s eyes rise from the board to your pouting face, and he smiles apologetically. Suddenly, your face dawns with disbelief and indignance.
Tim swiftly picks up one last piece and knocks one yours over.
“Checkmate.”
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I dont....know what people mean when they say they don't believe in marriage bc they don't need a piece of paper to prove that they love each other.
That's not....what that's for? Like do I believe in marriage? You mean do I want to own the house I live in and have custody of my own children and have the person I want to be the beneficiary of my will and visit my partner in the hospital if something happens
It's weird that people act like it's like...a hypothetical show of love and conformity and not a legal document that grants the person u wanna spend ur life with the tools required to do that with you
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bitbugbites-re · 8 months
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𝙻𝚊𝚙 𝙿𝚒𝚕𝚕𝚘𝚠 | 𝔥𝔢𝔞𝔡𝔠𝔞𝔫𝔬𝔫𝔰
Headcanons on how different RE men would give you their lap as a pillow (and vice versa!)
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tumblr exclusive!
characters: Albert Wesker, Carlos Oliveira, Chris Redfield, Ethan Winters, Leon S. Kennedy
gender: gn! reader
cw: FLUFF, (slight) NSFW // lap pillow // ktober
a/n: there are THREE vers. of leon in this post because they give that boy WAY too many damn personalities (re3r, re4r, re6)
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𝕬𝖑𝖇𝖊𝖗𝖙 𝖂𝖊𝖘𝖐𝖊𝖗 (any rendition)
Giving you his lap:
Doesn't typically invite you to lay on his lap, you usually are the one to just wiggle your way onto him
Once he picks up on you liking it though, he'd probably offer when you were sad or upset about something
&
The dude has got rock-hard thighs because of his genetic mutations
It starts to get uncomfy pretty quick, so you gotta grab a pillow for yourself to place under your head (never back down, never WHAT?!)
Sometimes he grabs the pillow for you absent-mindedly because he knows you're gonna ask/get up for it
& NSFW
Usually never leads to anything nsfw, especially so if he's working while you're on his lap
I really only ever see it leading to nsfw stuff in the event that you approach him with the intention of seducing him (in which case it'll be you servicing him -- only sometimes it'll lead to full-on sex, as long as you're forward about wanting it)
Using your lap:
He doesn't automatically lay on your lap -- you're the one who offers it to him and he usually turns it down
It's not that he doesn't like it, he just isn't someone who is too big on physical touch
he also feels embarrassed laying in such a position
&
When he does lay on your lap, it's usually because you put him there against his will (typically when he's sad)
he secretly likes it
You like to stare into his eyes since they're such a unique color. he claims to hate it (he doesn't, he's just prideful and won't admit he likes cheesy lovey-dovey things)
Gets mad at you if you mess up his hair (doesn't physically stop you though, just grumbles and complains about it half-heartedly)
Can't fall asleep no matter how comfortable your legs are. he's just very particular in the way he falls asleep (and everything else, too)
If he doesn't have anything else to do, he'll usually just lay there and wait for you to fall asleep. If you do, he'll get up and carry you to the bedroom, covering you up before going back to work
& NSFW
Doesn't usually lead to anything nsfw in this scenario either
You gotta lay it on thick if you want him. he's a smart man and he can pick up on social cues -- he just isn't the type to have a high enough sex drive that causes him to jump at every opportunity available
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𝕮𝖆𝖗𝖑𝖔𝖘 𝕺𝖑𝖎𝖛𝖊𝖎𝖗𝖆 (re3r)
Giving you his lap:
Will both offer and/or just randomly place you on his lap 24/7
If you get on his lap first without him saying anything, he gets really excited. The "my-cat-fell-asleep-on-me" kind of excited
&
He's got substantially thick legs. Can be pretty comfortable to lay on when his legs are relaxed -- although sometimes he tenses his legs unconsciously and you have to ask him to unflex them
Has a little bit of trouble staying still for a prolonged period of time. He'll start out pretty still, but if you're having a conversation or he gets too into it, he'll make a lot of movements with his arms and/or upper body
Constantly in awe of you. Trying to look at your face, trying to pet your hair or rub your legs, etc. Just can't get enough of you.
He likes talking to you as you lay on him, too. Not very silent unless you fall asleep on him, in which case, he often glances down to look at your face. Will take pictures of you if you're okay with it, too.
& NSFW
Leads to nsfw things pretty often. In this scenario, you're the one to initiate it most of the time since you're the one by his package
Gets an almost immediate boner every time. Dude's got a high sex-drive and it doesn't take much from you to work him up
If you do end up playing with him in some way, he'll either want to pay you back or have full-on sex
Using your lap:
Literally just throws himself down on you. Most of the time you don't even have to ask if he wants to use your lap. He just does
&
Makes you pet his hair. Rub his facial scruff. Touch his arms. Dude is needy af
If you're eating something while he's on your lap, he'll just let you feed him. Seriously, you just stick stuff in his mouth and he eats it without saying anything
If your legs start to fall asleep and you ask him to get off, he'll just swap positions with you and put you on his lap instead
Will make you take selfies together while he's on your lap. Then proceeds to send them to his friends (usually Tyrell) as a way to brag about how he has a cool partner
Falls asleep on you really easily and snores loud as FUCK
& NSFW
Will start to get extra touchy if he wants to initiate sex. He'll reach up and cup your face, wrap his arms around your midriff and snuggle his head into you, etc.
Starts by giving you oral and it's usually the gentle, slow, loving kind.
If it leads to normal sex, it's probably going to take place on the same surface where he was lying on your lap (i.e. -- couch, bed, floor, etc.)
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𝕮𝖍𝖗𝖎𝖘 𝕽𝖊𝖉𝖋𝖎𝖊𝖑𝖉 (re: death island)
Giving you his lap:
Occasionally offers his lap to you. Doesn't do it too much because he's not always thinking about it
Most of the time his offers are either because you're sad or because you're watching something together
&
His thighs are a mix between hard and soft. He's pretty muscular, so at first you'd be expecting more of a solid feeling, but it's not as bad as you'd have guessed. It's a just-right type of deal. (could be due to the fact that he's getting older...)
Isn't super touchy. He'll rest his arm along your body, maybe, but other than that he doesn't do anything too extra. The two of you kinda just enjoy the idle comfort from one another
Very chill kind of lover. Wouldn't get mad if you started getting a bit squirmy or tried readjusting your head's position every 3 seconds
If you have a bowl of popcorn, he's reaching in a grabbing handfuls for himself -- doesn't notice he's eating most of your snack either. (he'll apologize and get up to make another bowl for the both of you, though. And then he'll eat most of that, too)
& NSFW
I don't see him initiating anything out of the blue, or even if he's turned on in this scenario. I do think though that if he got a boner, he'd kinda just awkwardly wait for it to go down. In that case, you'd be the initiator, offering to help him out
Would be fine stopping after reaching his orgasm. Might offer to play with you using his hands. He'd be open to sex if you suggested it.
Using your lap:
Never lays in your lap on his own. Often turns you down when you offer him to lay in your lap
I feel like he likes being in more dominant positions, if that makes sense? He likes being the big-spoon, while you're the little spoon
&
In the rare occurrence that you do get him on your lap, it's just kinda awkward. He just lies there with his arms crossed
Tries to get comfortable, but can't. He's a big guy, so it's a little tricky for him
Tries his best to stay on your lap if that's what you want, but eventually gives up. Offers for you to either lay on his lap or lay against his chest instead
& NSFW
Not much, if any nsfw things result from this scenario
Maybe if you started running your hands along his arms or touching on his chest, something would happen. He'd probably make a flirty joke about you feeling him up, and then things would go on from there
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𝕰𝖙𝖍𝖆𝖓 𝖂𝖎𝖓𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖘 (re7, re8)
Giving you his lap:
Offers his lap whenever he's trying to be romantic or considerate of you. Really only offers because he thinks you like it
Not to say that he doesn't like it -- he'll take any kind of touch from you -- he just doesn't have any kind of preference. Touch is touch
&
He's got soft thighs. He's not built, but he's not in bad shape either -- he's got a very average build, so his legs are pretty comfortable to lay on.
A lot of the time, he plans to ask you if you want to lay on his lap beforehand. He'll make snacks and lay them out on the coffee table, or he'll light some candles in the bedroom -- it all feels very loving and soft
He likes to place his arm under yours and hold your hand while you watch something. He does the circular thumb movement, too
If you have a baby together, and it starts to cry, he'll grab a pillow and put it down under your head before going to check on the child
& NSFW
Honestly, you're the one jumping him most of the time, and it's not because he doesn't take initiative -- it's because the way he cares for you turns you on
Usually starts once you lean up to kiss him...and keep kissing him
If you're in the living room, he takes you to the bedroom to have sex. It's the kind that's very gentle, slow, and passionate
He gives great aftercare, too. Cleans you both up, and carries you to the shower if you want to take one
Using your lap:
He'll lay in your lap if you suggest it to him, although he doesn't do it on his own very much.
Thinks it's cute when you ask him, and he cracks jokes as he goes to lie down
&
Makes sure to be very still. Tries not to readjust his head too much, thinking he might annoy you with it
Usually keeps his arms crossed when his head's on your lap. Again, tries not to move too frequently
If you have a kid, they'll try to take your other leg, and Ethan thinks it's funny that you've got two people on your lap
Your kid will request that you pet their head, and Ethan will follow along teasingly. You end up running your hands through both of their hair
& NSFW
If he starts rubbing your knee or the area above it, you know he's trying to start something up
You often say something along the lines of, "I know what you're trying to do," and he laughs and admits it
He'll lean up and kiss you, and then the two of you will take things to the bedroom. Again, you have very gentle, slow sex -- plus good aftercare
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𝕷𝖊𝖔𝖓 𝕾. 𝕶𝖊𝖓𝖓𝖊𝖉𝖞 (re2r)
Giving you his lap:
Will offer you his lap sometimes -- he can be a little absent-minded, so it's pretty much an occasional thing unless he notices you frequently putting yourself in his lap
He's a little shy about you laying on his legs, but he likes it a lot
&
He's got really comfortable thighs to lay on. They've got a slight bit of muscle to them, but not too much
He's a little awkward when it comes to knowing what to do with his hands. He'll pet your head, but he does so with a strange rhythm -- or accidentally yank a little bit of your hair. He then apologizes profusely and pulls his hand away. If you want him to keep touching you in some way, you have to guide his arm/hand down and place it where you want it
The first few times you lay on his lap, he's pretty stiff. As your relationship continues, however, he gets used to it
Will quietly fall asleep after a while and you won't even know it until you try saying something, noticing that he isn't responding
Occasionally mumbles stupid stuff in his sleep. Sometimes you can hold a conversation with him and he won't even remember it
& NSFW
You're the one who initiates it most of the time. He'll get a boner and you'll tease him -- he'll flirtatiously tease back, and you'll end up servicing him where you're sitting
If you're in the living room he worries about staining the couch, but will let you continue if you tell him to not worry about it
Passionate, fairly vanilla sex. He doesn't really like being too rough with you because he worries he might be hurting you
Decent aftercare -- he cleans you up first, and once you're both cleaned up, he asks if you want to go back to lying on his lap
Using your lap:
Only occasionally he will put himself on your lap of his own volition. Usually, you're the one to ask him if he wants to use your legs as a pillow, and agree
Very rarely turns you down, if at all. It makes him really happy when you offer your lap up to him
&
Tells you almost every time how comfortable your thighs feel.
He likes it a lot when you touch him. Leon likes you petting his hair, rubbing his arm, but his favorite out of every option is when you take his hand and hold it. It feels like a very tender moment to him
Likes to talk to you while he's on you. Whether it be about the show you're watching, his day, your day -- he's talking
Sometimes he will spell things out on your leg using his finger and make you guess what it says. It's usually something random like "cactus," or "pizza"
& NSFW
The two of you will tease and flirt with one another, and that's what leads to things heating up. He'll sit up and start to kiss you, and that's typically the cue that the two of you will be having sex
Sometimes he starts with oral in this kind of scenario, sometimes it just leads straight to a little bit of foreplay then sex
Again, very vanilla, but loving and caring sex. He gives good aftercare here, too
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𝕷𝖊𝖔𝖓 𝕾. 𝕶𝖊𝖓𝖓𝖊𝖉𝖞 (re4r)
Giving you his lap:
Knows when you could use his lap, and offers it accordingly. He has a good sense of what you need, and when -- even when you're not upset
Feels very comforted when you accept, and likes the feeling of your weight on him
&
He has really nice legs, and they're fairly soft. They aren't as cushiony as when he was younger (re2r), but still comfortable to lie on
No longer awkward with his hands, knows exactly what to do with them. He's got very smooth, rhythmic movements as well
Doesn't fall asleep with you in his lap as much as he used to, but it'll happen occasionally. He tries his best to stay awake, wanting to spend time with you -- even though it's hard for him because he doesn't get as much sleep anymore and he gets really relaxed with you around him
If you feel him up, he'll laugh and tease you about it. He thinks it's funny when you poke into the fatty-muscled part of his arms and legs
& NSFW
Using him as a lap pillow leads to nsfw things quite a lot. Sometimes it's started by you touching him up, sometimes it's started by back-and-forth teasing, sometimes it's started by him asking for a kiss
The sex has gotten a little less vanilla over time -- nothing too crazy, but the two of you have definitely explored many more positions, kinks, etc. as time went on
He's got a routine down for aftercare as well -- the two of you know what the other likes, meaning that you're both left feeling pretty satisfied after the deed is done
Using your lap:
Doesn't really put himself on your lap randomly anymore. Over time, he's realized he prefers having you on his legs instead -- but he's not against laying on your thighs
If he does put himself on you, it's usually for good-times sake
&
He still compliments you on how soft your legs are
Leon falls asleep much more on your lap than when you're on his. Sometimes it knocks him out right away -- he just can't help it
Loves when you move his bangs out of his eyes, especially if the two of you are watching something
He now automatically takes your hand in his, holding it. He doesn't let it go, either, even if he falls asleep in your lap. There's no getting it back until the two of you separate
Doesn't make conversation as much as he used too -- as he got more comfortable over time, he didn't always feel the need to fill in the silent gaps. He does make quite a few quippy one-liners if you're watching something, though
Leon still plays the word-drawing game with his finger on your body, except now he chooses harder words like "potassium," or "armadillo" (though, sometimes, he misspells them and the two of you laugh about it)
& NSFW
His new cue for initiating sex is by squeezing and playing with your leg -- although flirting and teasing still leads to sex between the two of you a lot, also.
The sex ranges from slow and gentle, to fast and passionate. It just depends on what kind of mood the two of you are in
Again, the two of you have a pretty good aftercare routine going, and you're usually very cuddly with one another once you've both finished
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𝕷𝖊𝖔𝖓 𝕾. 𝕶𝖊𝖓𝖓𝖊𝖉𝖞 (re6)
Giving you his lap:
Even years later, he's still really good at predicting when you want to use his lap. He offers it at all the right times
Thinks it's cute that the two of you have this years-long tradition going on. He jokes that someday, you'll be in the retirement home together trying to get onto his lap haphazardly
&
His legs got a lot more hard as time went on. You joke around, telling him that he's hard as a brick now -- but you secretly still enjoy resting on his lap as much as you used to when his thighs were softer
Falls asleep a lot like he did in the beginning -- he's getting old and more tired as time goes on. However, he is good at staying awake if the two of you are watching something
If you like to watch reality TV, he shits all over it/the people in it (He secretly likes it though; his favorite is The Bachelor)
You've started joking around with him, telling him to take his shirt off when you're in his lap -- you tell him that you don't know how many years left you'll have to look at his abs, and that you need to enjoy them thoroughly before they're gone (he only laughs and tells you he'll have them forever, 'till the day he dies)
& NSFW
Still leads to nsfw things, although not as much as when the two of you were younger
You're not as wild, doing crazy positions -- but you do try different, smaller things to spice it up in the bedroom occasionally
Aftercare is still the same, although sometimes you're the one cleaning him up now -- for some reason, despite his job, sex seems to take the life out of him
Using your lap:
Started putting his head back onto your lap more. He does it in a joking manner, but it became special to him overtime due to your guys' history of doing it
If you have a kid, and they like putting their head on your lap, he uses them as an excuse. He'll make some silly joke, telling you that he needs attention, too
&
Instead of complimenting your legs, he now presses kisses to them randomly. He knows that over time you became a little more conscious of your body, so he started doing this to ensure you he still thinks you're beautiful
Both him and your kid will fall asleep on your lap. Sometimes one of them will snore really loud and wake the other up --you try to stifle a laugh every time it happens
Lets you or your kid tie his bangs up so that he can see the TV without them getting in his eyes. He thinks it's funny
Still makes you put your arm around him, holding onto his hand. Over time, he's started kissing it every once in a while, as well. He's very affectionate with you
The finger word-drawing game has reached a new height. He has started googling impossibly long and difficult words. You can't even beat him anymore -- and you can never tell if he's actually spelling the words right
& NSFW
Leon still squeezes your leg to signal that he wants you -- although he's a little less playful with it, as he's conscious that you're a little more sensitive about your body nowadays
Again, pretty normal sex-life for your ages -- if not a little more frequent than others like your peers
Your aftercare is still the same as well. You and Leon have no complaints, and the two of you will likely continue your routine until you can't anymore
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For the official and original Kinktober 23 prompts, check here. Credits to @kinktober2023 for the ideas!
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fuctacles · 15 days
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What goes up, needs assistance coming down
For @steddiemicrofic "top" | 510 | G | no cw | established relationship | if you saw me post this earlier and delete it bc i pasted the wrong version, pretend you didn't | Ao3
Sometimes, when Eddie writes a particularly delicious twist in his campaign, he wonders how in hell he had repeated senior year two times.
But then this shit happens.
Because he's been in this exact situation before, and smart people are supposed to learn from their mistakes. Thankfully, Steve is supposed to get back from work any time now. Maybe he loves him too much to make fun of him. After Eddie bears the humiliation of calling out for him because there's no way he'll figure out Eddie's out here.
As soon as he hears the car pull in and the door slam closed, he yells out,
"Steve!"
The steps crunch on the gravel, rounding the house, and his worst nightmare comes true. Because he hears more than one pair of footsteps. Double humiliation it is.
"Eddie?"
Aaand that's Henderson. The last person he'd want to see right now.
"Hey, man. What's up?" he asks nonchalantly his favourite kid, who grins up at him.
"How about you tell me, huh?"
"Oh, because I'm on a tree?" Eddie scoffs at him. "Har har, Henderson, very clever."
His rescuer isn't looking very rescue-y either. He's just standing behind Dustin with a bemused expression, eyeing the ladder lying prone below the tree.
"Why?" is all he asks.
Eddie sighs and points to the coils of fairy lights he had dropped to the ground in his panic after the ladder fell.
"This so doesn't answer my question." Steve raises his eyebrows disapprovingly. "Henderson, put the groceries away, help yourself to the fridge. Your dads need to talk."
"Gross." Dustin makes a face but snatches the grocery bag from Steve. He turns back to Eddie while walking away. "Good luck!" He gives him a toothy grin. Eddie flips him off, but his eyes are focused on Steve, who's setting the ladder back up. Soon, they're at eye level, as Steve leans on the top of it.
"Why?" he asks again. "Why would you do that again?"
Eddie looks away, hoping Steve will postpone this interrogation until after his feet are back on the ground.
"I had this, okay? It's not as bad as the roof. If the ladder didn't fall—"
Suddenly, Steve's face appears in his periphery. His eyes are stern.
"You should have waited for me," he points out.
Eddie makes a face. Okay, here he goes.
"I wanted to surprise you. I saw how you liked the lights around the Wheelers' garden," he explains, hoping the heat over his cheeks is imaginary. Henderson was way too close for him to be humiliated like that.
Steve's face softens.
"Baby," he coos, leaning into his space.
"Please don't—"
Steve ignores him, landing a soft kiss on his lips.
"My sweet boy," he murmurs, and now Eddie's positive his face is red.
"Can you put me on the ground first, please?"
Steve gives him a boyish grin but helps him climb down the ladder without further teasing.
"Thank you—" he barely makes out before Steve's on him, peppering his face with kisses.
"The cutest metalhead in Indiana."
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tubbytarchia · 4 months
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To all the nosy neighbour enjoyers, thank you for being that. Anyway here's my propaganda!! Just some of my favorite moments tee hee
Sorry if my BigB looks weird (I tried really hard :( ) I'll pretend that that's intentional given my rabbit hybrid BigB thoughts under cut:
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I made a little post about this before but basically BigB has such rabbit behavior:
1. Cannot help but keep burying himself underground like it's his natural habitat (seriously he comes back on ground to build a house on a mountain and then immediately makes an elaborate underground hideout again. Or how he built backrooms in SL and kept retreating there. Or how he was literally underground when he ran into Pearl, for Pearl to inform him that it was night time and BigB immediately wanting to retreat back underground. Or how he was underground for almost the entire "red winter is coming" session. Or)
2. Often fidgety around others
3. Constantly cautious but doesn't let nervousness show if there is any
4. More prone to keeping distance and watching rather than engaging
Idk he is extremely prey animal behavior (positive, affectionate) and I can never see him as anything but a rabbit now. I considered giving him rabbit legs too but then I was like nah. Because I think him having weird rabbit posture in a mostly human body contributes some inherent awkwardness and a bit of uncannines (fitting with his gaslighting tendencies). After all he's kind of out of his element above ground (or that's how he acts!) and that's when people are going to be seeing him. But just you wait till he stands tall for a change to tell someone off (like Cleo in SL or Scott in LimL). And with such posture, he inadvertently makes himself look smaller, which certainly would help him weasel his way out of undesired situations like he often does, eg by talking people into pitying him to save himself from dying. I'd also like to imagine him to be smart enough to manipulate his rabbit ears to not betray how he's feeling or to make others think he's feeling a certain way, unless he feels particularly threatened or something. That's maybe half the appeal of animal ears to me, that they can be an added tool for emoting, but a hybrid moving them in deliberate ways is a fun concept!
Oh and he has caving boots!!
I do kind of seethingly hate how he looks with his ears drawn back but I did the best I could. I really hate having human ears in addition to animal ears personally, but if I put his ears any further up where they'd look cuter (Pearl's antennae for comparision) it'll look really weird. Aghh whatever he's supposed to be awkward so whatever please ignore it Im going to cry
Also if you think the old design is cuter, it's almost certainly because of the lesser facial hair lol trust me!! And I changed the curly hair to be a bit less curly in likeness to Lee from Walking Dead because I did not realize that BigB's skin is basically that and I couldn't help myself. I was overall really unhappy with my old BigB design so yay for redesign. I swear its not just animal features that make things interesting for me...... maybe somewhat....
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hyunniesgirl · 6 months
Text
Another Love | Part 2
Summary: you've been hopelessly in love with Han since you were children. One night you confess your feelings to him.
Words count: 5,302
Warnings: a bit of angst
Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6
>> Masterlist <<
A/N: hello!! I'm really happy about the feedback I got on the first part, I got sick and stressed because of work that's why it took me a bit long to post this part, I'll try and be faster for the next ones. Spoiler: things will get more interesting on the next part.
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Han couldn't sleep, couldn't eat or even function properly since the day you left, it was so strange not having you around. He wakes up, gets to work, the boys make him eat something, they practice, then they eat something again because they know he's going home to starve himself in his pit of misery, then he gets home, takes a shower and goes to sleep.
He's always anxious, too afraid of losing you, every time he looks at his phone he's scared that a message from you will come saying you don't want to be near him anymore, saying you are not coming back.
He really wishes he could like you back, why wouldn't he? You're pretty, smart and funny. But he just never thought about you in that way, he's not sure why. You were always just his best friend, the one person that encouraged him to do the crazy things he wanted, the one person that got his back when things didn't work out, the first one he told when he passed the audition to be a trainee.
When he saw you at the party he was happy to see you smiling with other people, he was usually the one making you laugh but it made him relieved to see you were okay even if it was not with him.
It hurt so much when you ran away from him, he was already feeling bad but that made everything worse. So he drank more and more until he wasn't feeling anything anymore.
He saw the guy you were hanging out with, he was with his friends and you were nowhere to be found and even though he knew you didn't want to talk to him he went after you.
He found you outside, seated on the floor probably getting some fresh air or waiting for Hannah.
When you saw him he wished he didn't go after you at all. Everything happened so fast that he almost didn't manage to hold you before you walked past him running away again.
Han just couldn't let you leave like that, he was that desperate. He wanted to make you stay no matter what and he hurt you once more.
Was he even a good friend at this point? How many times can you possibly hurt someone and still be called a friend? He felt like trash waking up in the morning and remembering everything.
Chan insisted on coming home with him, he was feeling too guilty and too tired to protest, so he let his friend crash on the sofa.
Since Chan was there, Jisung should have expected a full breakfast when he got to the kitchen. Eggs, bacon and toast were waiting for him, but he didn't feel like eating.
"I feel awful, do you think I should go there and apologize to her?" Han asks and Chan shakes his head.
"She needs time, that's all you can give her now"
Han sighs, his anxiety going through the ceiling. He's lost, not sure if it's possible for things to go back to the way it was.
He could tell how worried you got when you saw him at the party, he knows too well the face you make when you want to scold him for not taking care of himself. So he spent the next week trying to get back on his feet, he doesn't want you feeling bad, he wants you to think the least about him so you can get over him soon enough.
So much happened during this time you were not with him, they finished their album and were going to Japan in two weeks. He wanted to show you their music, their new concept, the outfits, you always loved to see the clothes they would wear. You probably already know all of this, since you're living with Seungmin but he wanted to be the one showing you so he could see you smile and feel your support.
>><<
The group had gone to Japan, that included Seungmin, so he asked Hannah to stay with you in his apartment while he was away. It's nice spending so much time with her, there is this boy in her communication class she is absolutely sure will match perfectly with you, even though you already told her you don't want to deceive anyone, the thing with Heeseung made you feel bad enough. You know she's insisting on it because she cares about you, but you don't want to start a new relationship already on the wrong foot.
"I'm sure he's great, but I won't be going out with other people until I feel like I'll be able to get over Jisung"
"And when is that?" She asks frustrated, "I know a lifelong crush won't go away in a month but don't you think you have to meet other people and open up?"
You sigh, you just don't want to hurt anyone during your process of healing.
"If I find someone I like, I'll go out with them, alright? But don't set me up with random people"
She huffs, nodding, that's better than nothing.
Since Han is away, you take the opportunity and go to your apartment. You need some books, you have been borrowing Hannah's in an attempt to avoid going there to pick up yours.
There's nothing different in the house, you don't know if you should feel glad or sad about that. Although your life is turned upside down, things are still the same. You are sure you just need a little more time, things will get better soon.
You know that, because it didn't hurt as much as you thought going back to your apartment, you expected it would be much worse. Maybe it's because he's not there? That could be it but you have hope that the overall pain is gone, that it's not going to be so bad when you see him again.
Of course, as Hannah said, a lifelong love won't go away in a month, nor in two or five months, you're not sure even a year is enough but you can't wait until then, he's still your best friend and you miss him like crazy.
You're going to come back home when you're sure you let go of these feelings. Yes, it's going to be hard being with him but it's harder to stay away from your best friend.
So when you feel like you're finally open to meet new people without comparing them to Jisung and not feel like you're tricking them, when you feel like you can like someone else without feeling guilty, that's when you'll know you are starting to get over Han.
You take some clothes out of your wardrobe and put them in the bag with your books. Hannah is coming to pick you up since Seungmin let you use his car while he's away.
"Are you moving, ma'am?" Hannah asks, seeing your huge bag.
"A girl needs to be prepared", you answer and she laughs.
"Do you want some coffee?", you hum in agreement while turning on the radio.
You feel like it's finally peaceful in your head.
>><<
It's been some time since you visited your family, your parents call you every week to check on you and Jisung but when the holidays come you two have to go back home.
That's how you ended up in the car with him, it's not a long trip since you're going just outside of Seoul but it's still awkward.
This is the first time you're seeing each other after the party. The whole trip it seems like Han wants to say something, but he doesn't, he keeps stealing glances at you, opening his mouth and then closing again like he just thought it better to stay in silence.
"For fucks sake, just say what you want to say", you tell him minutes before your arrival at your family’s home.
He flinches, looking at you with puppy eyes.
"I wanted to apologize, about the whole thing at the party", he clears his throat, fidgeting in his seat.
You stare at him for a few seconds. Even though it hurts, the whole situation is less painful then you thought it would be.
When you received the call from your parents telling you to come home with Han on the weekend you couldn't say no, you don't want them to know about all the drama and before you could make up some excuse about Han's schedule they told you he already had agreed to go.
You exchanged messages with him, setting up the time for him to pick you up at Seungmin's place and you dreaded every minute of every day thinking about the moment you would have to face Jisung again.
When you got into his car, you felt uncomfortable. You made some small talk and left at that, hoping he wouldn't keep trying to talk. It's been two months since you confessed, maybe your heart is already accepting the fact that you and your best friend are just that, friends.
Of course it still hurts, you're not sure how you're going to feel seeing him with a girlfriend, but you hope it'll only get easier from now on.
"It's okay", you say. "You were drunk, let's not think too much about it"
"But I hurt you, again", he sighs, looking at you with a frown on his face.
"Yeah, you did", you sigh, "but you're my best friend and you apologized, I'm not going to hold that against you"
He parks the car, but doesn't make any movement to get out. Jisung is staring at his hands, holding the wheel.
"You're too soft on me", he mumbles.
"I know", you smile sadly, "it's just how things are between us", you open your door urging him to get out. You already can imagine your mothers making a fuss about why you stayed so long inside the car instead of going inside.
Your parents come out while you're going through the gate, your mom has a bright smile on her face and is waiting to give you a hug. It's good to be in her embrace again, her warmth makes you feel like everything will be okay.
"You lost so much weight, aren't you taking care of her?" Han's mother scolds him while giving you a hug and feeling you out.
"It's my fault, school is just crazy right now", you tell her, hugging her back.
"Nonetheless, you should eat", she looks back at your mother, "let's double the side dishes we packed for them", and your mom nods, going back inside with her best friend.
You take a deep breath, receiving a sympathetic smile from Han before he goes into the house. It's going to be a long day.
The lunch is somewhat calm, other than the dozens of questions your families ask to you two. About college, about living by yourselves, about Han's trips, how you stay alone and how that's dangerous, they ask about everything like they don't talk to you every week.
"I forgot the ice cream", your father says, slapping the palm of his hand onto his forehead and you can already predict the scolding he's going to receive from your mother. So you jump on your feet, offering to go to the convenience store to buy some.
"Go with her", Han's father says and he nods.
You wish he didn't, it's suffocating being so close to your best friends while still uncertain of your circumstances, but if you say you don't want to, they are going to ask why and having to explain that is going to be worse than spending the day with Jisung.
You walk quietly, looking at the houses on the street. Everything is still the same, other than some renovations made to the old houses there's nothing new. The convenience store is a ten minute walk away from your house. It's good walking a bit after eating so much, the thing you miss the most about living with your parents is your mother's food.
"Which flavor?" Jisung asks while looking into the freezer.
"My mom likes strawberry and yours like chocolate, let's take both", he nods.
"Oh my god, y/n and Jisung?" You hear that damn voice you can't forget even after almost 10 years.
You put on your best smile and turn around slowly.
"Hi, Haneul", you say, poking Han with your elbow, he's still focused on choosing ice cream.
"Oh, hey", he nods at Haneul, closing the freezer.
She eyes you two up and down and smiles.
"Are you finally dating?" She squeals and you can tell she's just being mean.
"No", you answer before Jisung can even open his mouth, he glances at you with a frown.
"I'm sorry, y/n, it seems not every teenage crush works out", she pouts, smiling even more now that she got what she wanted.
You watch as she turns around, walking more deep into the store and you grab the ice creams from Han's hands, going to the cashier to pay for it.
Haneul hated you ever since Jisung dragged you to go on their date in middle school, it's not your fault but you always guessed she blamed you for things not working out with him.
You want to cry, not because you're sad but because you feel humiliated. It's so frustrating knowing that everyone has always known about your feelings for Han, it's even worse to think one day a lot of your school classmates are going to see his wedding pictures with you as the third wheel as always and think of how much of a loser you're.
"How did she know about that?" He asks when you get out of the store.
"I don't think I did a good job at hiding my feelings", you shrug.
Han stops on his tracks, you only realize that after giving a few steps and you look back to see him staring at you with a confused face.
"Was I the only one that didn't know?" He asks and you sigh, you're not really in the mood to have this conversation.
"Our parents probably don't know either", you say and he huffs.
"I'm not joking, y/n! Why didn't you ever tell me?"
"What difference would it make if you knew?" You yell, finally losing it. You can feel the tears brimming in your eyes, but you won't cry, you were finally feeling a bit better and you're not going to waste another tear on this one sided love.
"Things could have been different, I could have been more careful, I could have told you to-"
He stops mid sentence knowing he shouldn't finish the sentence, but it's already too late.
"Would you have told me to move on?" You scoff, looking around to avoid the tears. "It's not that easy Jisung, this is not the same love you felt in your relationships that lasted three months", you know you're just being mean now, but you can't control it, not with all the hurt you're feeling. "I've been in love with you for years, don't you think I was afraid of that? Of you telling me that years of me pining over you were worth nothing?"
You turn around, "tell our parents that I met someone from high school and I'll be back later", you don't give him time to say anything back before you walk away.
After a few minutes, you feel the tears running down your face. At least you avoided crying in front of him.
Why does it have to be so hard? Why can't you just forget about him already? This process is taking too long and too much of your energy.
You sit in the park, wiping your tears and looking at the children playing. Everything was easier when you were at that age, you had no worries other than if it would rain the day you would go play with your friends outside or which present to give your parents on their birthday.
You look at your phone, answering your messages, your mother sent you a text telling you to not stay out too late but you don't think you'll be able to go back and stay in the same room as Han right now.
"Y/n?" You hear a strangely familiar voice, you look up and see a handsome man walking towards you. You're sure you know his face, but you just can't remember who it is.
He sees your frown and laughs.
"Jeongho? From middle school", he tells you and your eyes widen.
"Oh my god, Jeongho! How are you?" You ask and he smiles, he grew up really well. He's much taller now but he's still as handsome.
"I'm doing well, what about you?" He asks, sitting by your side, "are you visiting your family?"
"I'm great", you smile and nod, "yeah, Jisung and I came to visit"
What are the odds of you meeting Haneul and Jeongho of all people right after you confessed to Han? The universe really must be playing with you.
"I heard that you are living in Japan", you continue.
"Yeah, I came here just for the holiday", he explains, "actually, I come by pretty often to Korea", he clears his throat, looking at you. "Are you and Jisung a thing now?" He asks and you smile painfully, why must you answer this question twice in a day?
"No, still just friends", you tell and he smiles.
He nods, mumbling 'ah'.
"And… by any chance are you single?" He asks and you nod, feeling embarrassed. "Well, that's good news for me", he says, receiving a confused look from you while handing you his phone, "mind giving me your number? I'd like to keep in contact with you"
"Oh", you stare at the device for a moment, trying to process what he's saying. Is he interested in you?
"It's okay if you don't want to", he chuckles, "I'm just shooting my shot, knowing you're not with Jisung"
You laugh, releasing the air you didn't even notice you were holding.
"Yeah, sure", you type your number and give it back to him.
He stares at you with a satisfied smile before getting up.
"I have to go now, my family is waiting for me, but I'll text you", he says, flashing a smile and waving goodbye to you.
That was certainly unexpected, you would have never imagined you would meet Jeongho and he would still be interested in you. That lightens up your mood a bit, maybe this time you'll make the right choice and choose the person that likes you back.
You and Han don't share a word on your trip back, you don't want to talk to him and he seems too deep in his thoughts to say anything to you.
You finally can breathe when you get to Seungmin's, he's waiting with Hannah, beer and food, all you needed after this hell of a day.
>><<
You are in a lilac long dress, your friends are all seated in the first row. The church is full of people, some you know, some you're not so sure. You're happy, feeling your heart beat fast and butterflies on your stomach. Jisung is looking directly at you, he smiles with a proud look on his face.
However, before you can step closer to him, a loud piano sound starts playing and after a few seconds you recognize the wedding march. People stand up but they are not looking at you, neither is Han, they are all looking at the church doors where a beautiful woman is entering in a long white dress, a child walks in front of her, throwing roses in her path. The familiar round full cheeks make your stomach sink, why does that child look so much like Han? He doesn't have a younger sibling.
Then, it all sinks in, you're not the bride. Of course not, he's marrying another woman, a beautiful one at that. He's building his life and forming a family and you're just there on the sidelines. The bride steps in front of him and gives you her bouquet, smiling kindly at you.
You open your eyes abruptly, your chest is going up and down at a fast pace and your breathing is heavy, you're soaked in sweat. It was all a dream, a nightmare.
You sit on the sofa, feeling sore, all your muscles are tense. You can't believe you actually dreamt about something like that, your fear of always being there watching your best friend have his own life while still in love with him is taking over, even though you're trying to get over him.
It's two in the morning and you can't go back to sleep. It's better to take a shower and maybe go for a walk to calm your nerves.
The warm bath helps make you relax, but the memories from your dream keeps coming up on your mind again and again.
You text the only person who is probably still awake at this time and your phone buzzes seconds after your message is sent.
“To what do I owe the pleasure of being contacted by my most beautiful friend?” Chan's voice sounds on the other side of the line.
You chuckle.
“I knew you would be awake”, you tell him, fidgeting with your feet while trying to explain what's happening to him without humiliating yourself.
“I had a pretty bad nightmare and wanted to take a walk, maybe eat something? I don't know”, you whisper the last part and Chan sighs, he can tell you're not feeling well.
“Sure, I wanted to take a break anyway”, he says even though he's full of work to do.
You meet at a convenience store nearby, Chan's apartment is not far from Seungmin's since they can't live far away from each other, everyone lives close. You and Jisung did too- cursed man, coming back through your mind even though you're trying to think of anything but him.
“So”, Chan says, taking you out of your thoughts, “Jisungie told me you had a bit of an argument”, he tells you carefully, resting his elbows on the table you two are seated while he holds the beer can.
You sigh, of course he would tell Chan.
“Yeah, we just met someone from middle school during our trip and it ended up like that”, you explain after swallowing a mouthful of the hot spice ramen you have in your hands.
“I know things are not easy right now, for you or for him”, he says carefully, “but you're best friends, you have to communicate and talk things through”
“I guess”, you sigh. It's not easy to talk about Jisung, more so after the dream you had. You thought the worst part was already over, that you were finally getting over him. But it turns out it's not just willingness that makes things happen.
You wake up to your phone buzzing, you look at the time it's almost noon. You look through your messages and can't help but smile, Jeongho has been messaging you everyday since the last time you saw him. It's nice having this kind of attention, he's handsome and nice, maybe it's time for you to open your heart to someone else. The nightmare you had really terrified you, just thinking about it makes your head hurt and your chest ache.
Jeongho: good morning
Jeongho: I'll be in Korea next week, maybe we could have dinner together?
You: morning
You: yeah, that would be great!
You decide to give this a chance, it's not like it is going to kill you and Jeongho is well aware about your longing feelings for Jisung.
You're dressed in a red dress, feeling a bit uncomfortable, formal attire is not your usual outfit choice, but Jeongho set the date in a really fancy restaurant that you're not used to.
Of course you went to fancy restaurants before, the boys took you out often to celebrate their awards and new comebacks but since you always insisted on paying for your meals, they usually went to fancy but still affordable places.
Jisung always offered to pay for your meals, but you never accepted. If he did, you were afraid you would look too much like a couple and your heart might make you even more delusional.
“Good evening, how can I help you?” The receptionist asks and you look around, trying to find your date.
“Hm, hi. I'm here to meet a person, Kang Jeongho?” You eye the list on the counter to try and see if his name is there.
“Yes, mr. Kang is waiting”, he tells you, “may I take your coat?” He asks, gesturing to the long cover you have over you.
“Ah, yes”, you say, taking the piece and giving it to him.
The man gestures for you to follow and you walk behind him to the second floor. Jeongho is waiting at a table close to the window, he's looking at the view that you can see now it's marvelous.
“Mr. Kang”, the receptionist says and Jeongho turns around, giving you a big bright smile while standing up.
“Thank you”, he tells the man who nods at you and walks back to the first floor. “You look beautiful”, he tells you, pulling the chair so you can sit.
“Thank you, I didn't even know there was a second floor in this restaurant”, you say while watching him take his seat.
“Yes, they only open it on special occasions”, he says and you frown, looking around.
“You mean, they opened it so we could eat here?”
He nods, chuckling to your terrified face.
“What are you, the president’s son?” You joke, nervously, suddenly feeling absolutely out of place and underdressed.
“Not at all, you know my father and he's far away from politics”, he jokes back, “I’m friends with the son of the owner, he owed me one so I just asked for a favor”, he shrugs.
You look dumbfounded, who is this guy? Surely not the same teenager that looked absolutely heartbroken when you rejected him in middle school.
“What did you do for him to go to such lengths to pay you back?” You ask, curious.
“I introduced him to his wife”, he smiles, “he's madly in love with her, so this was nothing to how grateful he is to me”
“Oh”, you nod. That must be nice, having someone madly in love with you.
The waiter interrupts your interrogation to ask for your orders, you have no idea what to choose, but Jeongho explains to you each dish, asking if you would like something more spicy, salty or sweet and telling which one he thought you'd like better based on your answers.
“You know, you were my first crush”, Jeongho blurts out after the waiter takes the plates back to the kitchen. You feel your whole face hot, looking at him with wide eyes, “I'm sorry, I just thought you should know”, he smiles and you notice he has some deep dimples in his cheeks.
“I thought you asked me out in middle school because you lost a bet or something”, you put your hands to your cheeks, trying to ease the redness.
“I think you never gave yourself enough credit”, he points out, leaning his face on his hand while watching you. “You were always too focused on Jisung to actually see that I was not the only one looking at you with heart eyes”
You smile sheepishly, you knew your crush on your best friend was going to come up in the conversation at some point, but now that it did you don't know how to talk about it.
“Well, I found out not long ago that I was not as good as I thought at hiding my feelings”, you tell him, “apparently everyone knew that I liked my best friend—except him”
“Am I right to presume that you still have those feelings?” He asks slyly, your heart is beating fast, what if you tell him the truth and he says he doesn't want to see you anymore?
“Actually-”, you sigh, “I'm trying to get over them at the moment”
It's better he knows the truth, so he can enter this aware of your standing.
“Well, that's more than I expected”, he chuckles and you look at him confused, “I thought you were still hang up on him”
“I actually confessed”, you're feeling a bit more confident after his reaction, “and I was rejected, so I don't think there's much for me to hang on anymore”
“So, I'm sorry if I'm being too straightforward- but could I be greedy and believe I have a chance?” He asks and you're sure his eyes are wavering a bit, is he nervous? Did you actually make someone feel that way because of you?
“Yes”, you tell him, biting back a smile and blushing, he smiles at you sighing in relief.
He stands up and reaches his hand out to you.
“Then, shall we take a walk? I have a long way to make you fall for me”, he bites his bottom lip, waiting for you to take his hand.
This is it, the first step for you to get over Han Jisung.
Han sees Lia's lips move but he can't actually hear what she's saying, every word you said the last time, keeps sounding on his mind like a bloody curse.
What would he have done if he had known sooner? Would he have liked you back? Surely not, after all these years he didn't feel anything romantically related towards you, but that may be because he never thought about you in that way. Would he have told you to move on?
"Are you listening?" Jisung hears Lia say and snaps out of his thoughts.
"Yes, of course", he lies, giving her a slight smile and grabbing her hand to squeeze it.
"You're just… acting strange, since you came back from your parent’s house", she frowns.
"It's nothing, I just… had an argument with y/n and now she's mad at me", he tells a half truth.
"I'm sure she's going to forgive you", Lia says, sympathetically, "you're best friends after all"
Han nods, sighing.
He had avoided telling her the whole situation with you, it could make her insecure since you two live together.
There's something different too, he just doesn't feel the same way about her anymore, the burning flame and excitement he felt when they first started going out is slowly dying down and he just doesn't know what to do anymore.
All his previous relationships ended up because he was too busy, or because his personality didn't actually match with the other person, sometimes the girl he was dating just felt uncomfortable about his friendship with you, but he couldn't end years of friendship because he was dating so he ended the relationship.
However, Lia is different. She's great and confident, she doesn't care that he lives with you because she trusts him. She's calm, her personality is nice, she's nice. So why? Why is he feeling like this suddenly? Why is he wavering when it comes to starting this new relationship?
When he gets to practice after a weekend of resting, he is still confused, however, he's trying his best to stay focused on their new album, music is the only thing he is sure of in his life right now.
It's half past the time practice should start and Seungmin is not there yet, after one more song he asks Bangchan about it, he's starting to get worried, what if something happened to you?
“Oh, don't worry about it, he's just interviewing his roommate prospect”, Chan answers.
Han freezes. Then, that means you're going back home?
------------------
A/N: If you like what I write please reblog or let me know in the comments, feedback gives me motivation to keep writing.
Taglist(I won't be tagging people without age in their profile or blank blogs in my content)
@hhwangsmoon @weareapackofstrays @shycreationdreamland @adestayskz @skizmee @ca11me3mily @realviviboss @sofix-hc7 @seungminsapuppy @starsandrqindrops @its-hannjisung @redstayrosie @mae-is-cute98
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genacity · 1 year
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Hi there 🫢
So I just had to write a letter… and I had to put it in an envelope (obvi) and it was one of those envelopes that you have to lick to seal.
Now imagine Scaramouche being ur roommate, and he sees you lick the envelope and his thoughts run WILD
I had to share this cuz idk 💪
🎐anon
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nsfw / suggestive scaramouche & the envelope; ANON THIS IS CRAZY WHY ARE YOU SO SMART
i am literally shaking. your last request was so good but this one takes it all 💯 HOW DO YOU THINK OF THESE THINGS
i was thinking of making this an entire fic by itself but i have other drafts i need to clear so you get whatever the hell this may be sorry 😰
you and scaramouche had been roommates for a few months now. he wasn’t the sweetest person in the world; but he payed his share of the bills, had a stable job, and had contributed to the house enough to be able to label him as a decent roommate.
the both of you never seemed to bother each other very often unless it was about the house. maybe the occasional “good morning” or “see you later”, but other than casualties, you never seemed to speak much.
maybe that was why you didn’t expect today to be so different than the rest. today, you had to head down to the post office to send a thank you letter to one of your family members. you had just graduated college recently and since they had send flowers and some money to “treat yourself” (you knew it would just go towards taxes anyways), you concluded that it would be basic courtesy to send a card back at the least.
you stood over the kitchen counter writing out the last of your letter to your extended family. your wrist ached with fatigue as you signed your name next to the love at the bottom of the card and put the pen aside, reaching over to the envelope you had put next to you.
scaramouche walked into the kitchen past you to slide a mug under and press a few buttons on the coffee maker. “what are you doing?” he had asked, the buzzing of the machine behind him making you lick your teeth to hold back the outward cringe. ‘that coffee maker must be old,’ you thought. ‘we should buy a new one soon.’
“just writing a letter.” you said flatly, picking up the envelope and turning to face scaramouche to engage in small talk.
scaramouche raised his eyebrows. “to who?” he inquired. you blinked and looked around for a moment; never had he held a conversation out with you for this long. this was definitely a first. “just some family that came to my graduation.” you murmured, lips occupied as you brought the envelope in your hands to your tongue to lick the seal.
you stuck your tongue out to glide it across the sticky part at the top, the taste of plastic lingering as you wet the seal. your eyes were too focused on the envelope to assure you didn’t cut your tongue (it’s happened before) that you didn’t notice the growing expression on your roommate’s face.
scaramouche’s eyes widened at the sight of your long tongue extending from your lips, carefully licking the adhesive and sealing the letter shut. his lips parted slightly, chest heaving with heavy breaths as his grip against the counter behind him hardened.
he could only stare, frozen in place as you finished the letter off with your stamps of choice and signing the address on the front. you said something to him, but he couldn’t hear you; the only thought in his mind your tongue and what it could do to him.
wait— what? what the hell was he thinking? you were his roommate; just some lowlife he shared an apartment with. but as much as he bashed himself internally, the image of you bending him over this counter right now, using that careful tongue of yours to please him was all he could see. vision foggy as his lips pressed themselves into a line, the sound of the coffee machine behind beeping snapped him out of his thoughts.
“scaramouche, hello? have you seen my—” “no!” he snapped, snatching the mug from the machine and rushing off to his room. your eyes trailed him confusedly. what was wrong with him? matter of fact, what was wrong with you?
you watched him rush away, eyes falling to the evident bulge in his pants before he slammed the door of his bedroom.
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snghnlvr · 6 months
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𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐢𝐬 𝐞𝐦𝐛𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐚𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠. / sim jaeyun
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sim jaeyun x fem reader!
read part two here <3
synopsis : who knew there was something behind your relationship with the infamous smart guy at school? you had questions as to why jake likes you and chose you to be his girlfriend out of all people. soon, you found out the truth: by a bet.
includes : 1.5k | cursing (internally) | again with the one sided relationship sigh | i’m a SUCKER for angst so.. | jake is a loser and i would end myself if this happened irl | y/n you’re too nice :((
extra: olivia rodrigo is my mom , if i was y/n i would’ve slapped the shit out of jake but let’s not get too physical here eh?? :] , i haven’t seen much jake angst (because he’s the most loving human ever??? he would NEVER ever do something like this) so here i am… :D
likes, comments, and reposts are very much appreciated <3
[below the cut]
“thanks for making me get $100, babe”
you look up from your seat to see your boyfriend, jake holding a $100 bill between his index and middle fingers. he sent you a wink which already made you blush like crazy but then you slowly processed the words.
what?
“what?” your expression dropped. you looked at jake, waiting for a response for what he meant.
“i said,” he planted his two hands in front of his desk, staring down at you with his beautiful eyes of his. you stared back with nothing but confusion in your eyes.
“thanks for letting me have $100 sweet cheeks.” jake’s lips curved up. he slowly leaned towards your cheeks, pecking them before proudly looking down at his cash.
that little nickname he gave you made your hearts do back flips as usual.
you stood still before replying, “what do you mean? you used me?”
you’ve liked jake ever since he was in the school’s soccer team since sophomore year. he’s popular for his smartness, his godly visuals, his amazing personality of his that steals the hearts of girls, and his talents.
your introverted personality of yours didn’t dare to make a move on jake. you were undoubtedly shy and didn’t like social interaction very much. all of the girls were in line to ask him out and directly confess their love to him, but you didn’t. you weren’t in line, you were just observing him from the side, mentally noting what he likes, didn’t like, what topics he likes to talk about and many more.
the only proof that you like him was through a little post it note you had on your desk before leaving to go to cafeteria.
sim jaeyun <3
was all you’ve written in pink in your yellow post it note. you haven’t told anyone, even your closest friend for you would be afraid of the public teasing that would soon eventually let the whole school know you like jake.
five months, he suddenly asked you out because he thought you were the “most beautiful girl i had ever laid eyes on but was scared to make a move”, quoted by sim jake himself.
at first you didn’t question it as to why he randomly asked you out.
you remember that day, you were blushing like crazy, heart almost ripping out of your rib cage, and you had all sorts of scenarios and activities both you and jake can do because both of you are in a relationship.
well, were in a relationship.
“yeah.” your thoughts were interrupted when jake responded with a heartless tone. “i admit that you were cute when you bought me gifts, but either than that,
i’ve never liked you.” his tone was monotonous.
is that why i reminded him of my birthday? is that why i reminded him of our monthsavrie? when my classes end? is that why i was the first to everything? good morning texts?
thinking about your past memories where you felt the most happy with jake,
was all just an act. just for the damn $100 dollars.
jake being the first one to hold your hand whenever both of you met, even if it’s a minute in the hallways or meeting after school ended, him being the first to notice you shivering and toss you his hoodie even if he was cold, him volunteering to help you study your subjects even if it’s 2am, him wiping your lips with his soft fingers from eating ice cream, him listening to your rants and sobs whenever your parents fight late at night, and always looking at you with nothing but love and admiration you believed,
all an act?
you lowered your head, trying to contain your proper breathing and trying not let your tears fall down. you exhaled, closing your eyes.
“who asked you?”
jake’s face slightly clenched when seeing your eyes filled with rage yet tears threatening to spill out. “who asked you for the bet?” you asked once again but with a firm tone. you didn’t break eye contact. you were thinking of his friends he always hung out with, park sunghoon, yang jungwon, lee heeseung, and many more but you felt like these people - your best friends as well - would never hurt you like that.
instead of being sad and running away, you’re staring at your ex boyfriend with bitterness. the loving stare you’ve had towards jake was rather replaced as if he’s your enemy. yeah, you’ve been backstabbed.
“does it matter?” jake tilted his head, shrugging it off. “what matters is i got my money.” he flicked his bill right in front of your face, his tongue peaking when he mockingly smiled at you.
you glanced at the dollar and then back at jake.
“did i mean nothing to you?” you asked, your thoughts suddenly spilling from your lips. “was our relationship nothing to you?” a tear spilled out of your eyes. seconds later, multiple of them were easily sliding down your cheeks.
you stood up from your seat, looking directly into jake’s emotionless eyes. “did you have fun playing with my feelings? did you enjoy taking my likeness towards you as an advantage? were your friends having fun hyping us up whenever we were around them? did you at least have some fucking sympathy for me!?”
after screaming, you looked down. you were going crazy. literally.
“god, y/n calm down. you’re embarrassing me, lower your volume.” jake crinkled his nose, eyes wandering around to see if there was anyone near the both of you.
despite not looking at him, you can hear the annoyance in his tone and the rolling of his eyes whenever you guys argue. he would call you “overdramatic.”
“fine.” you gulped before looking at him. you imagined yourself as a crying mess. it’s like every argument you had, jake would not cry, but you were.
you had to contain yourself to not let your emotions overwhelm you, but it’s hard right now.
you just got used for money.
“i hope that $100 dollar bill reminds you how much of a shitty person you are.” you grabbed your book bag and ran for your life.
out of that suffocating room.
i can’t believe it, you thought.
he’s a bitch he’s a bitch why is he a bitch!? why did he choose me!? why did he hurt me? i did nothing but .. love him and be there for him.. what did i do to get treated like this??
your chest hurts like shit, you can’t breathe, you can’t think properly, all you wanna do is to hide forever and never face jake the following monday at school. you wanted to go anywhere. anywhere but be in a room with him, sim jaeyun.
god, love is fucking embarrassing as hell.
-
YEAHHH jake angst drabble🕺 idk how to feel this one as i can’t imagine jake doing such a thing :(( but we need a change don’t we ? i hope you enjoyed it!! thank you for reading!! ❣️
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aurae-rori · 1 month
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DR RATIO ANALYSIS PT 3 BUT IT'S JUST GAY
Now, you might be saying - "Aurae, you've done part one, and part two, so why do we need a part three?" The answer is because of two things - one. I made a deal with the Tumblr Peoples that if one of my posts hit more than 50 likes I would do this analysis. Two. Mihoyo is making this shit canon. I CAN'T MAKE THIS UP. So, let's delve into my usual disclaimer, as we might have some new people joining us for the first time with my insanity.
I have been researching psychology personally for about six years, so although I am not a professional (crawling my way there through the education system. I will be one, one day.) I do have some experience with analyzing homosexuals. Psychology hours, my children. They don't call me "chronically cooking" for nothing. Maybe I should change my url to that...
NOW THAT MY LONG AHH DISCLAIMER IS OVER, LET'S GET INTO THIS! It's time to deconstruct these homosexuals like a modern airplane, because they might as well be taking off with how canon they are.
"It can't be canon," they say, but then Mihoyo DOES PAID SPONSORSHIPS WITH THESE FUCKERS BEING GAY. We've all seen the paid partnership edit. We've all seen the video where Aventurine has the audio of "nice rack" as he talks to Dr. Ratio. PAID SPONSORSHIPS. Now, if that piece of evidence isn't enough for you - let's dive into their actual relationship, which is just a HOMOSEXUAL MESS. I will be focusing more on how Dr. Ratio sees this guy as this is a Dr. Ratio analysis™, but hey, the crumbs.. we eat 'em all. Amen.
Let's start off (I say as I write this part three days later) about how people are like, 'Aven is Ratio's favourite idiot' WRONG. Ratio does NOT consider Aventurine to be an idiot and knows that he is smart and capable in his own right. While Ratio is book smart, Aven is extremely street smart and holds his own very well. Ratio does not consider Aventurine to be an idiot as he takes off his plaster head around him and actually indulges in his whims around him. This is a blatant showcase of fondness because although he is emotionally constipated and can't be affectionate through words without sounding semi-backhanded because he's never had true affection in his life, he showcases his love through actions rather than words. He's just bad at showing love, okay? But he does love Aven. Or like him, to some extent, if you don't want to see them as romantic, which is fine. However, no matter what you label their bond as, it's obvious that they care for one another.
Also, the fucking ZEST FEST that was 'keeping up with Star Rail'. He says, "wait a minute - MUTUAL?" which indicates that he has respect for Aventurine in the first place. He LITERALLY TOLD US that he respects Aventurine and he was commenting on Aventurine's playstyle & everything.. also, at the end, he was here because 'I appreciate this show's dedication to knowledge' - his TONE. Kudos to the VA because that was not convincing at all. Bro was NOT here for the knowledge, bro was here to be GAY!!! Also his little own bathtub couch. We all know Aven bought it for him. Trust, I am John Hoyoverse.
"The Charming Audacity" HUH? BRO? Okay this is hilarious to me because this is the first time that we ever really see them interact with one another, and we get absolutely bitchslapped in the fact that Dr. Ratio calls this guy's audacity 'charming'. That's GAY. That's HOMOSEXUAL.
Also, comparing him to a peacock.. a very beautiful bird.... Must I say more?
Now, the part that I really want to focus on is the part where he gives the Doctor's Note to Aventurine. This shit is important. And I agree with the people who are like - Acheron helped him. Because she did. She was a big part of it and she helped Aventurine get back on his feet in the void. Dr. Ratio is not his only reason to live, but the note, showing that someone will stay by his side? Showing that someone truly cares for him? Someone who's waiting for him when he get back? This bond that he has with Dr. Ratio isn't fake. He already has a starting point to get back to - an anchor to return to. Dr. Ratio is his anchor. Whenever he goes off to do crazy shit, Veritas Ratio will be there when he returns. Because Ratio is loyal. Ratio cares. He cared enough to almost jeopardize their plan to make sure that Aventurine was going to be okay. He cares so damn much about Aventurine that he decided that this man's emotional state after the fake betrayal was more important than all of fucking Penacony.
If you want an example of "I would let the world burn for you," it's Ratio. He's a romantic not in the traditional sense, but he cares and loves Aventurine so damn much it makes my heart hurt. "Do stay alive," he says, knowing that Aventurine struggles with living. Those three words mean the whole fucking world to someone who struggles with suicidal ideation and suicidal thoughts. Someone wants you to live. Someone wants you to stay. Someone wants you by their side.
Dr. Ratio cares. Let me say that again - he cares. He banters with Aventurine, tries to create an environment where Aventurine can feel a little bit more comfortable with the two of them, even in a place as dangerous as Penacony. He will put his own life on the line for Aventurine.
He cares. He cares so damn much. I hate gay people. They make me VIOLENTLY homophobic.
Dr. Ratio after expressing his care indirectly and complimenting Aventurine indirectly: Did I do it?
Aventurine, who has caught none of the hints:
Anyway, thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.
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Can you do some headcanons or stories on arcane? Specifically Vi or Sevika if your comfortable. I was just wondering but if you don't want to then you don't have to, you have free will.
Know that you're loved!
★。/ !bark like you want it! \。★
pairing: vi x f!reader, sevika x f!reader (separate)
fandom: arcane
word count: 1,470
tw: canon typical swearing/slang, some light spoiler warnings, and MDNI content, mainly because we know these are some dominant ass women ;) 
THIS IS NSFW CONTENT! BE WARNED!
song title: bark like you want it by sir mix-a-lot
notes: i love my girl vi so this request was a given, thank you anon! Hope you enjoy! :D I normally didn't like Sevika as much, but I will admit, writing her head canons for this post definitely made me reconsider
! be sure to like and reblog if you enjoyed !
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↳˗ˏviˎ˗ ↴
Vi is (without a doubt) very rough around the edges
She’s street-smart but she doesn’t really know what to do when it comes to actual romantic relationships, sex is easy, feelings are hard 
Her time in Stillwater makes her distrustful of people, along with her generally traumatic and difficult childhood, so it will probably take a while for her to begin to see you in a less-than-threat way
After that things are pretty smooth
You don’t really know where the split between ‘friendship’ and ‘relationship’ is, because they both include her joking, flirtatious personality ranging from skirting touches on your thighs and up your back, or teasing pet names like ‘sweetheart’, ‘cupcake’ and ‘love’
Other than that she’s very protective of you, especially if you live in Zaun
If you go out on errands she’ll always make sure she’s conveniently there at the times you like to go, able to loop an arm around your waist and guide you through the crowds
If someone is stupid enough to try and pull something on either one of you, Vi is not above beating the shit out of someone to keep them from laying a hand on you
I have a feeling that she’d confess to you accidentally in the middle of a fight
Perhaps she had been disappearing for long periods of time, and coming back bloodied and injured, refusing to tell you anything of her adventures (mainly because she doesn’t want to worry you). And eventually you pester her for a bit too long and begin a full verbal fight, where she suddenly blurts that she loves you
Now as a lover?
The teasing banter still remains, her little playful nicknames too, if anything they get worse. But she gets more confident with her touches, more deliberate. A hand in your backpocket while you’re walking, an arm around your shoulder, pinching your ass when you’re waiting outside a store, this girl has no shame
! mdni content below !
Now, i have a feeling that Vi isn’t really uneducated when it comes to sex
If anything i feel like she’s a fast learner-
The first time you actually lie together, Vi is sure to take it at your own pace, eager to please beneath a taunting smile, even if you don’t know what you like at first, she’s likely to find it quickly 
I personally don’t see Vi as owning too many sex toys - if any at all - but i think she would 100% favour using her fingers to anything else
Just the way you clench down on them, how she can use the rough calluses on the pad of her thumb on your clit to her advantage, and how deep she can pry, anything to make you scream for her
To be honest? I also 10000% expect her to try and flip you over and put you in a chokehold with her forearm tight against your throat, just adding enough delicious pressure to hitch your breath, but never enough to hurt too much
9/10
Her oral game would be fucking good too, i can tell. But she’d probably prefer to finger you or use a strap-on so she can continue to tease you with all these sinful little things she can come up with while she fucks into you
I’d say more of a biter, but she can still eat you out like a starving woman
Oral game 7/10
Aftercare is important to her, always making sure that she wasn’t too rough with you, cleaning you up, running you a bath or just lying with you to cuddle. Wants to make sure you know that you’re more important to her than some casual fling, and that she wants to ensure your happiness above anything
(Also gives you some balm for the definite bruises on your thighs and throat :D)
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↳˗ˏsevikaˎ˗ ↴
Sevika is… intense
In all honesty, probably started as enemies
She probably wouldn’t want anything to do with you unless you already worked with Silco, so we could say you started in the shimmer warehouses, helping to distribute it throughout Zaun
You get your work done effectively, so Sevika overall sees you as a valuable position in the business, and keeps you around without much complaint
At some point Silco requested you deliver a hefty batch of shimmer to a more dangerous part of the Undercity, and sent Sevika with you to ensure no messes were left behind
Safe to say, you were ambushed
Despite Sevika being there to ‘protect’ you, you’re still able to hold your own, displaying proficient skill with your weapons against bandits who thought they could steal some of the shimmer vials. In the carnage, Sevika decides begrudgingly that she has respect for you
From there, it’s less of a ‘friendship’ and more of a drinking buddy situation
She doesn’t often tolerate the presence of others in her private time, so you label it as a friendship initially
She’s slightly more soft-spoken when she’s alone with you, and shares her cigars with you while she’s gambling, which often earns a strange look from her opponents as you hover over her mechanical shoulder with her cigar hanging from between your lips to see her hand, a bit too close
But Sevika lets you be without anything more than a bit of a grumble
I don’t think she’d even particularly say outright that she loves you
What happens is - instead - that you both have a drinking binge at the pub one night, after a successful night of gambling, and you both get absolutely shit-faced
While drunk she drags you back to her house and the night is filled with hazy sex, enthusiastic makeouts and early-morning cigarette smoke
You try to sneak out the next morning, expecting it to only be a one-night thing
She catches you (i headcanon that she’s a pretty light sleeper, but i suppose that could be said for most Zaunites). I don’t think she’d even say it then, just drag your ass back to bed for a (consensual) round two
After that you go to the bar together as normal, go about your business, now with the added bonus of Sevika protectively snarling at a drunk guy hitting on you by saying ‘that’s my spouse, fuck off’
(And of course, with plenty of sneaky sex between your deliveries and hurried makeouts :D)
! mdni content below !
BUCKLE YOUR SEATBELTS MFS, THIS SHIT IS KINKY
I would like to clarify, you will never top in this situation, Sevika would rather die than bottom to anyone, no matter how much she loves you
Spanking, spanking, spanking, spanking–
Hickeys, bruises, bite marks, the red tracks of her nails over your back, just anything that would leave even the most fleeting mark on your skin
That being said, would also 100% leave hickeys on places she knows you can’t hide easily
Definitely into sex toys (ball gags, bondage, strap ons and vibrators with little remotes she can keep in her pocket just in case, she especially likes to plant down one of those dildos with the suction cups and get you to ride it, all the while begging for her to just touch you, but she refuses, smoking as she watches you cry out for her)
She also likes crying-
I think she’d prefer to have you from behind, your back against her chest, ramming into you with one of her favourite straps, one hand pinching at your nipples, tweaking them between her fingers, and the other rolling tight circles on your clit, sometimes switching one out to wrap around the column of your throat
Definitely into edging on most days, and will resort to overstim if she’s happy with the work you’ve done in the day
Risky sex is definitely her thing, in her office in Silco’s base, in the warehouse on the crates of shimmer, under her desk, you on your knees to service her
She’s especially rough, and absolutely loves some degradation, and the way it makes you clench around her strap or her fingers, your eyes rolling back into your head while you scream for her
Aftercare is rarely over-the-top
She’ll cuddle you if you ask her explicitly but she prefers to share a cigar with you, or blowing smoke into your open mouth while you breathe against her bare chest
If she’s been unable to fuck you for some time, she’ll clean you up after about four or five rounds, mainly by eating you out until you end up giving her another two, but she’ll make sure you’re clean before you pass out anyway
Despite everything, Sevika will always make sure she doesn’t go to far
If anyone asks though, she will absolutely deny how she always makes sure you remember your safeword before you have sex after a makeout
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thanks for the request anon!
if you have any more requests don't hesitate to ask :)
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kenzlovesyou · 7 days
Note
reporter!y/n and wbbstar!caitlin would be fun...
hi i’m so sorry this took so long 😕 i hope you enjoy this!
plot: short fluff you’re an intern reporter about to do a post game interview for the very first time! you’re super nervous about it and caitlin helps you practice before the real thing.
Reporting Live
➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖➖
“Okay, Y/n. Just chill.” You said to yourself in the bathroom mirror. You’d just arrived at Gainbridge Fieldhouse to cover your very first professional basketball game and ask questions at the post-game interview. The game you were covering would be the Indiana Fever against the New York Liberty team. You were trying to hype yourself up for the game, but you were extremely nervous. The Fever had been getting serious media attention ever since Caitlin Clark had recently been drafted to the team, so you knew many people would be tuning in.
You stare at yourself and repeat the mantra you’ve been telling yourself since this morning. “You are brave. You are smart. You are super cool and you are totally ready for this!”
“Ready for what?” You jump in shock and turn around to see Caitlin Clark right behind you. The Caitlin Clark. You stare at her for a second not quite processing how Caitlin Clark is currently standing behind right behind you and asking YOU the INTERVIEWER a question. “Sorry um what did you say?”
Caitlin shrugs, turning on the bathroom faucet and rinsing her hands in the sink. “What’s got you so nervous?” She looked you up and down and smiled, “hey, that’s the reporter lanyard. Are you one of the interviewers?” You nodded shyly and giggled.
“Can you tell it’s my first day?” Caitlin laughed at you and shone her head. “Nope, definitely not. You look totally professional.” You couldn’t tell if she was being sarcastic or serious but you hoped it was the latter.
Caitlin’s words were kind, but you knew they were just that. She didn’t know you, she didn’t know your performance capabilities. There was no real way for her to tell you you’d be any good. You looked at ground and rocked back and forth on your feet slightly. Caitlin noticed this and frowned. Perhaps she could do something to cheer you up? She knew what it was like to be nervous at a new job, as her first WNBA game had just been a week prior.
“Do you wanna maybe, I don’t know, practice interviewing me?” You looked up at her quizzically. “You know,” she continued, “so you aren’t as nervous when it comes to the real thing!” Your cheeks flushed. Not only was she a great player, she also had a great personality.
“We could try that!” Caitlin nodded and signaled for you to start. “Wait. I can’t I don’t have a microphone.” Caitlin rolled her eyes at you and passed her half drank water bottle to you. “Perfect. Okay. Caitlin Clark. What do you think made you want to go pro in basketball? You’ve been amazing ever since you were younger, but what made you want to do this as a career?”
You held the water bottle ‘mic’ in front of Caitlin as she prepared an answer. She took a beat to think about her answer and smiled to herself. “I mean I think I just want kids to have someone to look up to, y’know? I just want them to know that, like, if they have dreams they should pursue them because it might end up paying off.” You nodded your head in response.
“That’s amazing. It’s good to know that besides having a remarkable talent you have such a good heart as well!” Now it was Caitlin’s turn to blush. Her cheeks turned rosy and she lowered her eyes to her shoes.
Caitlin cleared her throat. “Well, y’know, maybe since you asked me a question I can ask you one too.” You looked back at her quizzically.
“Aren’t I the reporter? What question could you possibly have for me?”
Caitlin stood up and walked closer to you, her eyes staring at you seriously. “Can I get your number?” You paused. Was the Caitlin Clark asking you out?
“How do you know I swing that way, Clark?”
“I guess that’s my second question for you. Do you swing my way?” You rolled your eyes at her and made a grabbing gesture with your hand and pointed at her phone in her pocket. She took it out and went to add a new contact and passed it to you. You typed your number in and before you knew it Caitlin had to leave to go warm up. You wished her luck and off she went.
The game was close, but the Fever ended up losing. You could tell by Caitlin’s face she looked disappointed. Her frown seemed to fade away when you walked up to the Fever team to do a post game interview. You went along the line of women, asking each one significant questions correlating to their stats and achievements in the game, and what they thought would come next. You sighed a breath of relief when it was finally over. The interviews went seamlessly, but that didn’t mean you weren’t going to still find something to worry about. You walked out to your car and started your car up to drive home, alone with yourself and your thoughts. That was until you got a ping on your phone.
unknown number:
great job on your first day! you didn’t look nervous at all, i guess the practicing helped? hopefully?
maybe getting dinner sometime could calm your nerves for next game :)
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stinkyme · 8 months
Note
Hi! i looove the way you write! is it possible for you to write “jealousy sex” but with dazai and chuuya? (and maybe nikolai🫣🫣)😫🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️
Hello! I am so happy to hear that, thank you so much, you are very kind! :D <3
I only do 2 characters per request (for longer oneshots), however.......I went a bit overboard with Dazai.....I am sorry (no i'm not), so I am currently writing Chuuya and Nikolai separately from him (both will be in one post) since their oneshots will be shorter :)
I can tag you if you want! :D Please let me know if you'd like to :)
Sorry that it took me a while to get around this request, I didn't have an inspiration and didn't want for it to be half-assed by any means, so I waited until I felt inspired and I hope it's up to the expectations :D
I hope you like it and enjoy it! :) <3
CW/TW: NSFW, fem!reader, established relationship, he is not really jealous..more so offended :3...at first it seems so at least..., teasing, edging, overstimulation, oral!fem receiving, vaginal fingering, clit flicking (twice), humping if you squint, multiple poses, vaginal penetration (p in v), heavy degrading (may be for some people), slight dumbification (Dazai to reader), reassurance & apologizing (reader to Dazai), it's rough at first then gets soft & slow, two purely vaginal orgasm, multiple orgasms, squirting (twice), creampie, if I forgot anything please let me know! :)
** he uses bella/bello (written like this in the fic) once which means beauty or beautiful/handsome in italian - apply the one you prefer more :)
I apologize for any mistakes in advance! :)
Jealousy sex || Dazai Osamu x Reader
You knew what you were doing. At first, you just wanted to toy with Dazai a little bit by giving into the flirtatious nature of a person in the coffee shop. They offered to buy you coffee, paying you a few compliments along the way. Just for fun, you would pay them a few compliments back as sweet giggles would escape your throat. You could feel Dazai's gaze as he was standing nearby, but not near enough for a person to think you are a couple. 
"So, could I get your number?" a person asked with a wide smile as you kept on chatting.
"Oh, well..I don't think that would be necessary." you replied as you were taking cups of coffee for Dazai and yourself and leaving the register. Person was left confused but they just shrugged their shoulders. You knew that there was a line you shouldn't cross.
The two of you were walking, finally reaching your shared apartment. 
"That was a smart move, really." Dazai says in a casual but somehow bitter tone.
"Oh? Well, I didn't think it was appropriate for me to give them my phone number." you chuckle nervously, Dazai's presence was feeling...heavy. Very heavy.
"No, not that." he says as the two of you enter the apartment and close the door behind. You put your coffee on the table while Dazai leans on the wall, observing you.
"What is it then?" you were not really playing innocent, but he was never straightforward so these types of dialogues were often.
"Oh?" he imitates you as he says it.
"Well, I think trying to make me jealous in the first place isn't really appropriate, but here we are." he says with a sly smile. Your face grows into confusion..was this a bitterness? A challenge? A mind game? You couldn't really read him at the moment.
"Do you wish to play dumb with me or what is it?" he moves away from the wall and places his coffee next to yours as he steps closer.
"So? What is it?" he tilts his head as a sly smile appears on his face again, speaking in a silky tone.
"Did you burn your tongue? I don't recall coffee being that hot." he plays dumb as he moves his head from side to side, observing you. He comes closer and you just keep looking at him, still unsure of his intentions. Is it really that big of a deal?
"Tell me." he whispers as he leans very close, his lips next to your ear.
"Is this…some new kink of yours?" he whispers again and pulls away, a light chuckle escaping his lips as he sees your eyes widening.
"No? It was a simple exchange of compliments." you furrow your eyebrows as you try to plead logical and innocent, but you knew what you were doing at that moment. You just didn't expect this reaction.
"Simple exchange of compliments in a simple coffee shop in front of your simple boyfriend. How simple!" he says in an upbeat tone, clapping his hands, as if he was discovering something never seen. You get slightly uneasy, still unsure of what he is exactly thinking.
"If you are jealous you can just say it." you scoff at him as you go by him and sit down on the couch. You were not in the mood for games.
"Mhm." he nods as a silky sound escapes his throat. He takes a few steps forward and sits on the couch next to you. 
"And you.." he pauses for a second as he cups your jaw with his hand and turns your head to face him properly.
"You should apply the same logic you gave to me, no?" his voice is very low.
"Huh?" you look at him with a face that gives off confusion and frustration. He places his hand on your thigh, his fingers sliding down and resting on the inner area of it.
"If you need something from me, you can just say it." he says in a very clear tone, giving you a smile. 
What an asshole.
"I am not following." you reply as you, in fact, start following.
"Oh come on now, you are not stupid. So don't play such games with me." he rolls his eyes as he sighs out dramatically, his hand squeezing your thigh as his other hand pulls your head closer to him.
"Why try to make me jealous then? Unless you need something, I see no reason."
"You wish for me to do something to you out of jealousy, no?" he smiles as he tilts his head, his voice dropping lower. You gulp, your bottom lip twitching for a second.
"Both you and I know that I don't get jealous, so..this was a futile attempt." he chuckles before his gaze becomes darker and lower.
"For me to get jealous, that is." his voice is insanely low now. He leans even closer, his lips barely away from yours.
"But I must admit, I am kind of irritated that you even tried it. Since both, you and I, know that nobody can really satisfy you in any way I can." he whispers, his eyes moving upwards and looking at yours.
"Wish to deny?" he asks as he gently parts your legs with his hand, making you gasp really quick. 
He really can be a dick sometimes.
"No." you reply softly as you feel out of breath. Your gaze goes lower, observing his lips that were so close.
"Good. Because I do." he says with a chuckle and your eyebrows move in confusion as he leans his head near your neck and starts kissing it. He places a first kiss right behind your ear and slowly moves down, kissing every part of your neck.
He reaches your collarbone and trails quick kisses over it, moving to the other side of your neck.
As his lips move upwards, trailing kisses up and behind your other ear, you can feel a knot of butterflies inside your tummy. His lips brush over your neck that was now completely painted in his kisses before he slowly sucks part of your skin between his teeth. He is now sucking on your skin teasingly, making you leak precum already. Dazai's fingers move up your inner thigh, gently brushing over your clothed cunt. He lets go of the skin of your neck for a moment, letting his lips brush over it as he speaks.
"I think you won't need this." he whispers into your skin as he undo button of your pants and pulls the zipper down. He slides both of his hands on your hips, putting them between your body and pants. Quickly enough, your body follows and you help him to take them off with your own movement; leaving you only in your underwear. Following he takes your shirt off just as quickly, skillfully unclipping your bra and sliding it down your arms. You can sense Dazai becoming more eager and less playful as he pushes you on the couch, not a single readable thought or emotion showing from his expression. However, you notice his eyes sparkling with certain slyness and lust.
He leans in, his lips wrapping around one of your nipples and he starts sucking on it eagerly, barely providing any licks in between to soothe the intensity. Dazai's other hand cups your other breast, squeezing your hard nipple between his thumb and index finger. He starts rubbing it between his fingertips, pressure almost as intense as the one of his treatment on your other nipple. You let out a soft whimper as you try to squeeze your legs, however unsuccessfully since his body is keeping them apart. Pop.
"Don't disappoint me now bella/bello, we barely started." he says in a slickerish tone as he lets go of your nipple, the corners of his lips turning into a wicked smile. You gulp, nodding without giving it a second thought. He looks pleased, but the pressure of his fingers on your nipple grows unbearable. You bite your lip, a weak moan still escaping your throat. He continues, his lips now kissing your tummy so softly that it makes your head spin.
You arch your back just a little bit, trying to ease up the painful sensation on your bruised nipple and enjoy the softness of his kisses. Dazai finally lets go of your nipple, his hand sliding down your waist as he kisses the area around your belly button, his lips sending shivers through your whole body. He moves lower, licking your lower tummy with the tip of his tongue, his eyes closed as he follows up with another feather-like kiss. Wrapping his hands around your thighs, he finally positions himself between your legs.
"Now..what should I do to you first?" you remain silent, uneasiness slowly crippling inside you as he talks to himself. He admires your wet cunt, his eyes fixated on it as he thinks. He sighs out, speaking up again.
"Truthfully, at the start I wanted to leave you like this, but..I changed my mind." he speaks of this so casually that it makes your blood boil but given your state you decide to remain silent and bite your tongue. This once.
Dazai slowly parts his lips, leaning closer to your cunt and you can feel his warm breath on it. The sensation covers your body in goosebumps as you feel his soft, coldish cheeks on your thighs. He squeezes your thighs, leaning even closer and you feel like your tummy will explode from anticipation and neediness. He takes a breath in and places his lips around your clit for a quick moment before pulling away.
"What do you think I should do?" he tilts his head, looking at you so innocently. You feel your eye twitch, currently on the brink of suffocating him with your thighs.
"Maybe stop talking and finish what you started if you want to and if you don't then don't." you reply in an evidently irritated tone as Dazai's face remains clueless. He leans his head on one of your thighs.
"Mm..you see, I want to but I am not sure if you deserve it." his eyes switch to the sly gaze from before.
"Maybe try begging a little bit, let's see how it will make me feel." he says happily as he smiles, his tone playful again.
Your cunt starts to ache from how needy you were at this point; lack of friction made it quite painful. You swallow your pride and mutter out as quietly as possible.
"Please." your voice is so thin that you couldn't even hear it.
"What was that?" Dazai leans more into your thigh, remaining a playful smile and tone.
"I said please." you repeat, a bit louder this time. Dazai sighs out.
"Hmm, it's not good." he says as he positions himself in front of your cunt again, parting his lips.
"A slut who doesn't even know how to beg is the worst slut of them all." he whispers quickly in a bitter tone, following by using the bottom of his tongue to slide over your clit. You let out a soft whimper, unable to think about what he said, your cunt still aching and in need for more friction. He rolls his tongue over your clit; now softly brushing over it with the tip of it. He moves his attention lower, giving a few kitten licks to your inner lips, collecting your leaking precum and sliding it upwards to your clit. Pain finally stops and your body fully relaxes, enjoying the pleasure as he starts moving his tongue up and down on your clit, barely brushing over it, but at a pace quicker than before.
As much as it teases you, it makes you let out a satisfied whimper and Dazai pulls away for a moment to place wet and sweet kisses on your inner thighs. He kisses one of your inner thighs from the middle and down to your groin, leaving a soft kiss on your clit before he gives the same treatment to your other thigh. Once he reaches your other groin, he spreads your legs apart even more, making your cunt more sensitive. He places the tip of his tongue on the very edge of your cunt's inner lips, steadily sliding it up in slow zig-zag motion. Once he reaches your clit, he repeats the motion backwards, moving his tongue down in slow zig-zag motion again. Then, he agonizingly slowly drags his tongue up in one straight line, right between your inner lips and reaching your clit.
You breathe out in pleasure, watching him for a moment before you let your head rest and close your eyes, just enjoying the sensations. Dazai's tongue starts moving in circles on your clit, completely covering it and stimulating every part of it with each circular motion he makes. Your hands become weak as you try to grasp anything underneath you due to Dazai increasing the speed. You can feel your orgasm building up quickly, a tingling and warm sensation spreading inside your body as his lenient tongue keeps doing wonders.
He swiftly switches from licking to sucking on your clit making your eyes roll back as a whorish moan escapes you. Your thighs start to twitch, but they feel weak as Dazai keeps on sucking your sensitive bud, touching it very softly with his tongue from time to time. His grip on your thighs grows more rough, keeping you in place as your hips begin to move to match his pace.
You feel the heat overwhelming you, breathy whimpers constantly leaving your throat as you get insanely close to your orgasm. You squeeze your thighs around his face, pulling him more into your cunt as you feel on the edge. Dazai keeps up, still sucking on your clit as your whimpers grow into moans, your whole body heating up. You finally feel your orgasm coming, your thighs shaky and weak and you keep moving your hips from time to time, needy to cum. Dazai suddenly pulls away, shamelessly ruining all the build up.
"No, no, keep going, please!" you look at him, your voice revealing evident distress. He just keeps looking at you, almost as if he is asking for more enthusiasm.
"Please, I am so close! Keep going, please!" your eyes are pitiful to look at, your neediness laughable. At least from Dazai's perspective.
"Please! I am begging you." your sentence slips past your lips faster than your mind could process it, pride almost completely lost now.
"You are getting better at this, I must admit. Greedy and miserable slut, let's see what else you can be." he says through a whisper before his lips wrap around your clit once more. He continues sucking on it and you can't even answer him as your head falls down, pleasure overwhelming you. Dazai's tongue rolls over your clit more frequently than before, while his lips and teeth apply more pressure. You feel your orgasm build up again, your body shaking as you roll your hips into the mattress.
Loud moans leave your lungs as you feel the intense heat bubbling inside your lower tummy, your cunt clenching around nothing. You feel your orgasm on the brink again and this time Dazai doesn't stop, rather he keeps on building up the intensity.
You feel a wave of warm tingles spread inside your body as your orgasm slowly starts unraveling. Broken mixture of whimpers and moans is only to be heard as your orgasm bursts inside of you, reaching its peak. Dazai unwraps one of his hands from away from your thigh, still keeping up his pace on your clit for the whole duration of your orgasm. Once it finally starts melting off, your breathing remains heavy as your body feels weak and shaky. Dazai swiftly inserts two of his fingers inside your leaking cunt making you gasp in surprise as he switches from sucking on your clit back to moving his tongue in circles. He doesn't give you even a little break and your mind feels fuzzy.
"Wait-" you want to stop him just for a moment, but the stimulation feels too much, but also too good that your own moans drown out your voice. Dazai's fingers move in and out for a bit, sliding easily as the feeling of his tongue on your sensitive clit makes your body twitch. You move your hand into his hair, grasping it roughly as you take a deep breath out that is suddenly cut off with your own whine as Dazai curls his fingers, pressing your g-spot. He keeps on relaxing and curling his fingers, applying a fair amount of pressure on your sensitive spot as his tongue circles on your clit.
You feel lightheaded as he keeps pleasuring all of your sweet spots inside and out of your cunt. He stops movement of his tongue for a moment and extracts his fingers, leaving just his fingertips inside your cunt. He lets out a thicker string of spit and inserts his fingers fully once again making your pussy tingle from added "lube". He pumps them in and out a few times as sweet moans escape your throat before he places the flat of his tongue on your clit again, slightly bobbing his head up and down. You circle your hips to match his movement once again and he curls his fingers again, directly and consistently rubbing your g-spot.
A chain of guttural whimpers slips past your lips as you feel another orgasm approaching as he keeps up his movement, your cunt clenching around Dazai's slim fingers. Dazai lets out a quiet whine as he feels your pussy pulsating around him and your clit swelling more under his tongue. You dig your fingernails into the couch, intense heat spreading inside your head as well as in your tummy and legs as your climax builds up even more, the first few tame waves knotting inside of you.
Your chest feels overly warm, your legs barely shaking as your body is almost completely tensed up now, ready for an orgasm that was so painfully close. Dazai whines into your clit as he feels strings of precum dripping down your pussy and coating his fingers and he quickly pulls away, extracting his fingers right on the brink of your release. You want to curse him out, but all you let out is a dissatisfied sound. Dazai pulls away from you completely and puts his still clothed thigh and knee near your cunt.
"Come on, get off." he says in a sly tone, his lips glossing from your wetness. You are too needy and too eager, almost immediately crumbling under his order and moving your cunt closer to his thigh, but he quickly moves it away.
"You have to be a bit quicker." he teases, placing his hands on your knees while bringing his thigh close again. You move your hips closer and he reverts away from you again, following with a malicious laugh.
"You really are incapable. Can't even get yourself off." he laughs once more, sliding his thigh close to you again and you try to meet him halfway before he is able to do anything, but he quickly lifts it up, making your attempt futile.
"You truly are a pitiful thing to witness. Your state is pathetic." he says coldly, his eyes piercing through yours and you swallow. Dazai puts his knee back on the couch and you move as fast as you can. Your clit brushes over his pants, sending shivers up your body, but he moves his thigh away once more.
"How many of these laughable rubs do you think it would take for you to finally cum? Perhaps one hundred?" he chuckles, looking at you with no empathy whatsoever as he moves one of his hands between your legs and flicks your clit with his middle finger. You yelp, a soft whimper mixing up.
"Ahh~" he lets out a little whine as his eyes widen in enjoyment of your low state. He flicks your clit once again and you choke out a moan, stinging sensation traveling up your body.
"It would be lovely to toy with you a bit more like this, but you have something else to do, no?" he smiles slyly, bringing his thigh close to your cunt again. You slowly move one of your legs between his and he observes in curiosity. You swiftly wrap your thighs around his own thigh and start desperately gliding your cunt up and down. You use your elbows as leverage, needily rolling your hips into his thigh. Dazai watches you for a moment before he bursts into a wicked laughter, the sound making your stomach drop.
"Humping me like a dog? What a vile whore you are." he says in a resentful tone. 
"Though, I will praise your creativity. So, can you get off like this, dirty whore?" he asks, voice low and challenging as he already knows the answer. You slow down your movement, trying to find a way to stimulate your clit in the best way, but your cunt feels awfully empty. Your thighs unravel in defeat as you shake your head filled with shame, though so yearning to cum.
"Seems like you can't do anything without me." he sighs out, as if it really bothers him. He makes a brief pause, analyzing your poor state for a few moments.
"I wish that guy from the coffee shop could see us now..more specifically, you." is the last thing he says in a colder tone before he spreads your thighs and positions himself between them once again. He places his tongue on your needy clit again, while simultaneously inserting two of his fingers inside your cunt. He curls them up and starts moving them in the previous pace, relentlessly pleasuring your g-spot as he keeps bobbing his head up and down, his warm tongue smoothly sliding over your clit. You gasp out, relaxing your body once again as the sensations of an upcoming orgasm builds up quickly. You put your hand in his hair again, grasping it rougher than before, not trying to risk it. He whines into your pussy, sending vibrations through your clit and making you whimper. He stops his movement for a second.
"Don't be so rough, I won't go anywhere." he finishes with a chuckle, quickly returning his tongue on your sweet clit, switching up his movement to only using the tip of his tongue and briskly, but featherly brushing it over it in up and down motion. Your body starts quivering while your orgasm builds up more, the intensity of it washing over you and making you moan out. Dazai pressures your g-spot more roughly, another first wave of orgasm breaking through. You feel pleasurably dizzy as your body tenses up, cunt clenching and pulsating as you finally feel the pure heat and intense tingles of your orgasm reach their peak.
Relentless moans escape your lungs as you breathe heavily, your grasp on Dazai's hair deplete completely as the intensity spreads inside your body, reaching every part of you. Dazai pulls away, leaving your clit alone as he keeps stimulating your g-spot during your orgasm. You keep gasping for air, long moans and whimpers taking all of it. Dazai puts his other hand next to your head, towering over you as he still keeps pressuring your g-spot. Your orgasm feels too pleasurable, too unbearable and like you are going to pee. You are trying to push him away as it gets overwhelming.
You let out little gasps and moans as Dazai keeps up his movement, relentlessly pressuring your g-spot making your weak and overly pleasured body crumble underneath him. You feel an oddly, but so overly consuming and vigorous relieving sensation inside your lower tummy. Loud gasps mixed with moans escapes your lungs as a watery stream fastly pressures its way out of your cunt. You feel the muscles of your cunt heavily convulsing. Dazai extracts his fingers swiftly, rubbing your cunt and slowing down the stream from spraying everywhere. You breathe heavily, your body feeling too tired and too sensitive. You notice that Dazai's pants are completely wet by your pleasure, making you a little bit embarrassed.
"Ah, you made a mess you nasty bitch." he notes in an apathetic tone as he unbuttons and unzips his pants, pulling them down. He takes them off completely, dropping them on the floor.
"Sorry." you say with uncertainty as Dazai pulls his boxers down, getting rid of them as well and exposing his hard cock.
"Apology won't fix this. Plus, my pants are not something you should apologize for.." he makes a brief pause, letting you sink in a "discreet" message.
"..So, why don't you just let me use that pretty cunt of yours and keep your mouth shut so you don't irritate me even more?" he asks in a wicked tone as he spreads your legs, observing your drooling cunt. He wraps his hand around his cock, tapping it on your cunt a few times. You twitch from small jolts due to sensitivity and Dazai aligns his cock with your inner lips, slowly sliding his cock inside of you.
As soon as half of his cock slides in, both of you gasp in, Dazai letting out a broken whine to mix in. He slides it in completely, his pelvic area kissing yours. You let out a mellow moan, your tummy filling up with warmth as your pussy still feels so sensitive. Dazai's strokes are slow. He lets out prolonged whimpers and whines every time when, painfully slowly, inch by inch of his cock slides in and out of you. It feels so good and it soothes your sore cunt making you breathe out in pleasure.
"Hah-, this makes me want to forgive you more easily." he whispers in a slightly shaky voice. It makes your pussy clench around his cock and he smiles slyly as he rolls his hips in and out.
"On second thought, even your cunt isn't good enough for me to forgive you." his voice is still breathy and shaky, however revealing more irritation. His slow thrusts make your head spin and all you can voice out are shameless moans.
"I don't think I will be satisfied.." he whispers as he puts his hands underneath your knees and bends your legs over your chest. He positions himself in a better angle, so he can go as deep as he would like.
"..Until I see you break completely. Just like a helpless, desperate whore." he spits out his words without sympathy as he starts thrusting vigorously fast, his balls roughly slapping the underside of your pussy. You moan out as you feel the tip of his cock in the deepest part of you in such short intervals. His cock perfectly pressures your g-spot as well as all others already overly sensitive spots inside, making you unable to speak.
You choke on your own sounds as Dazai whines loudly, digging his fingernails into your skin. His thrusts are merciless and pleasurably painful and you swear you feel like you will cum again, if not something else. Your muscles tense and relax around him quickly, providing a pulsating sensation and it makes him bite his lower lip as he starts choking on his own whines. Your eyes tear up and your throat dries out as pleasure becomes overbearing, heavily concentrated in your most sensitive parts. 
"I'm sorry-" you choke out desperately, tears running down your face as your voice becomes thin and drowned out.
"Shut up for now." he spits out, spiteful feelings completely taking over him as his hips move at a rapid pace, his cock twitching inside of you. Dazai's eyebrows furrow in pleasure and frustration, loud whines escaping one after another. The heavy slaps of his balls make your skin feel like it's bruising and burning as your cunt drowns in pleasure. It's all too confusing and overwhelming. You moan loudly, unable to think or compose yourself. His cock feels too good inside, relentlessly stimulating your sweet spot.
You can feel your body giving out once again, your muscles convulsing and another stream of watery mixture splashes out of your cunt. You gasp for air as your whole body feels weak from another heavy climax. Dazai doesn't slow down, he just keeps going, a few heavy whimpers slipping past his lips upon the sensation your orgasm was providing. You breathe heavily, your release slowly wearing off, but sensitivity builds up way too quickly again, making the slightest touch of his cock hurt in a bittersweet manner. You take a deep breath in.
"I am sorry, I am so sorry! I will never do it again!" you almost yell out, desperate for some delicacy.
"Do better." he almost whines out, his own eyes slightly tearing up as he overly stimulates himself as well. You take another deep breath in as his vigorous pace continues.
"You are the only one for me! The only one who could ever make me feel this way and I am sorry!" you choke on your own moans, guttural sounds stopping you from speaking. His cock feels way too good, but your cunt is way past sensitive to take it properly.
"I will never repeat this, I promise. Please forgive me." you say in a weaker tone, unable to gather your thoughts.
"You are the only one, I swear. I don't care about anyone else, it was just a stupid way for me to see your reaction." you just keep talking, trying not to focus on the sensations. Dazai keeps up his merciless pace, pounding in and out of your cunt like it's a toy without feelings.
"Fuck! I am sorry, I promise I will never do anything like that again! You are the only one for me, so please-" you gasp out suddenly as Dazai slows down his pace, letting you calm down. You are panting and your body feels sore and heavy. Dazai slowly lets go of your legs, letting them fall on both sides next to his body. His thrusts are slow and delicate, almost faint.
"Thank you." you whisper out, still exhausted and overwhelmed, but enjoying the slow stimulation of your sweet spots inside. Dazai places one of his hands around your jaw, cupping it in moderate strength. He leans his face close to yours as his thrusts remain slow and gentle.
"I will be remembering what you've just said. You better do it too, mkay?" he asks almost happily, making you sigh out.
"Okay." you nod as much as you can and he places his lips on yours, kissing you for a moment before slowly pulling away.
"Good. You seem to only be able to be fucked into obedience." he chuckles as he places another delicate kiss on your lips. His thrusts are slow, but deeply pleasurable.
"I am not a dog." you say as sharply as you can.
"Mm, you sure?" he smiles in a teasing way, refreshing your memory from before. You turn your head to the side and he lets go of your jaw. He slowly pulls out his cock, leaving your throbbing pussy empty.
"Roll over." chuckling to his own joke, he gently helps to reposition your body and makes you lay flat on your tummy. 
"I will let you go off easily today only." you say in a softer tone and his lips curl into a teasing smirk.
"Whatever you say." he whispers as he spreads your legs with his knees before aligning his cock with your entrance and slowly pushes it in. You let out a whimper as Dazai follows up with his own. He lays on top of you, not with his full weight, but enough to provide some odd sense of comfortability and safety. He rolls his hips in a slow motion, resting his head next to yours as he observes your pretty face. You let a breath out as his thrusts feel good, delicately stimulating you and sending shivers up your spine. 
"Be good for me and lift your hip." he whispers in a very soft tone that makes you melt and you obey. He slides one of his hands, resting its palm on your lower tummy as the two of his fingers reach your clit. You relax your hip as he starts drawing small circles with his fingertips. Your whole body relaxes and you let out a weak moan as it all feels so good. Dazai speeds up his pace just a little bit, only to pleasure your g-spot more frequently. You feel your groins tingle as his cock slides in and out so easily, gently throbbing inside of your soaking cunt. Dazai is breathily panting in your ear as a few words of praise finally come out of his mouth.
"You were so good for me, can you do it once more?" he asks with a shaky whisper, his warm breath making your body tingle. You nod as you feel your lower tummy already building up with climatic sensations, this time less intensely, but just as pleasurable. Your soft moans and his heavier pants fill up the room as his cock pulsates inside of you, slowly rubbing over your sensitive spots. His fingers keep up the pace and you feel another wave of another orgasm.
Your body slightly tenses up and you close your eyes, the feeling of Dazai's warm body on your back tying this all together. Your release finally starts knotting inside of you, your heavy moans and whimpers silencing Dazai's sounds.
You roll your hips, trying to ride out the pleasure as Dazai keeps thrusting slowly, however very close to his own release. Your orgasm finally melts away and you gasp out, feeling completely exhausted and sleepy. Dazai quickly lifts himself up and also lifts your hips towards him, not pulling out. He positions you in a doggy and you bite down on your hand and he chuckles.
"I will be fast, I promise." he says as he begins thrusting just as he said - fast. You bite your own skin, once again overwhelmed. He keeps thrusting, whorish moans now escaping his throat as his cock roughly pulsates inside your cunt. His skin keeps slapping yours, making it feel like it's bruising even more and worse than before as he gets vigorous and greedy for his own release. You quiet down your sounds with your hand, leaving deep teeth marks behind and pool of saliva as his cock reaches deep spots inside of you.
He is panting loudly, his cock twitching even more as his whines get high-pitched and strained and with few more rapid thrusts he finally reaches his orgasm, releasing a whip of cum inside of you. In the middle of his release, he pulls out and lets a few bigger whips of cum paint your pussy on the outside as well. It makes you shiver and you feel it sliding down your sensitive skin. Dazai swiftly leans closer, gently licking the parts of your thighs and cunt where cum was falling down rather quickly and he lets your body flop on the couch.
You could fall asleep immediately, but you use the last ounce of energy to talk to him.
"This would all be so much easier if you just said that you were jealous." you say sleepily as your eyes close, but you are still somewhat awake. Dazai lays next to you, delicately tracing his fingertips on your bare back.
"But it would all be so much less fun." he whispers back and you grunt, almost immediately falling asleep. 
Surely, Dazai made sure you slept comfortably and as soon as you woke up, there was a nice, warm bubble bath waiting for you and lots of praises and cuddles. However, you will have to take care of the food, as always.
The End :) <3
Sorry for the time this took me, I was also about to take a sudden break when this request came in, so :")
I hope y'all liked it and enjoyed it! Thank you so much for support and love, it means the world to me! :) <3
Forehead kisses for everyone :3
Chuuya & Nikolai coming soon!! :D
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frankenkyle19 · 11 months
Text
Sweet Pain
Kai Anderson x virgin!reader smut
word count: 2.3k
my first ever actual Kai smut and… I kinda hate it but I’m not gonna waste 2.3k words and three days of my life to not post it
warnings: Uhm Kai… blowjobs, forceful Kai, unprotected sex, loss of virginity
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Kai wasn’t exactly one to be gentle. He just wasn’t. It wasn’t in his nature. You’d known Kai for many months. Had been his first ‘follower’ as he called you. You would have liked to at least be called a friend. That’s what you were, right? Friends? You’d been there for Kai since day one. Supported him in everything he did, made sure he always had food, and anything else he needed, all to just be called a follower?
It hurt. It hurt to see him treat you like nothing when you were there before everyone else. The only real person who came before you was his own sister. Winter. Now don’t get it wrong, he could be nice when he wanted to, but it was usually for his gain. He wasn’t just nice for the hell of it. 
But one thing was for sure. You were his. His alone. His little lamb. No matter how hard it was for him to show it, he did love you in some way. 
The one thing he hadn’t done yet was make love to you. Or…well, fuck you. You were a virgin, and you made that known. Kai wasn’t worried about that. He could take you anytime he wanted to, so it wasn’t for your sake that he waited. 
He wanted you so tightly wrapped around his finger that getting to take your virginity was just the icing on his odd, cultish cake.
And that’s exactly what he did.
After one of many weekly meetings with his followers, he asked you to stay behind. You swallowed hard, a swell of nervousness rising up inside. You knew you hadn’t done anything wrong, so why were you still so nervous? Maybe because it was Kai. You never knew what to expect from him. He was unpredictable.
“Little lamb, why are you so nervous?” He asked with a chuckle, smoothing his bright blue hair out of his face as his eyes scanned your body. You weren’t sure you liked the way he was looking at you right now. It was almost predatory.
“I just… I’m not in trouble am I?” You asked, swallowing hard as you felt your voice shake.
“Why would you be in trouble, little lamb. Unless…” he began, taking a step towards you “you did something wrong?” He asked curiously 
“No! No I didn’t… I didn’t do anything wrong I just-“
“Then you have nothing to be afraid of. I just want to talk to you.” He said gently. It was odd. His voice didn’t match his posture or expression. It was too… sweet. Almost a fake kind of sweet.
He carefully brushed his hand down your cheek, forcing you to look at him. Without a word he took your hand and led you upstairs. You figured you’d talk in the living room, but he led you up another flight of stairs and to his room. A shudder ran through you. What was he planning?
“Kai I- I don’t-“ he hushed you dismissively, closing the door behind you, and much to your worry, locked it too. There was no good reason why he would lock it. 
“Get on the bed for me.” He said sternly, beginning to take off his jacket 
“Woah- woah what are you d-doing?” You backed up until you hit the bed, having no choice but to sit. 
“I’m going to take you to bed. Isn’t that obvious? You’re smart aren’t you dear?” He chuckled, lifting off his shirt and revealing his toned, milky body. 
“What?” Your eyes were wide as you looked up at him, now hovering over you, hands on his belt buckle.
“But I’m a-“
“Virgin, yes I know. I’m well aware, but after tonight you won’t be.”
His words nearly made your heart stop. He was going to take your virginity? After all these months, all this time longing for him? After begging for any scrap of his attention?
You just nodded slowly, because at this point did you even really have a choice? It was Kai here, he wouldn’t care if you fought him. If he wanted something, he was going to get it. 
“I’ll be gentle with you this one time, since it’s your first. But don’t expect anything after that. Got it?” 
All you could do was nod, unable to find words. Your eyes locked onto his hands that were deftly undoing his belt, sliding it through the loops in his pants before tossing it onto the floor. One step closer you thought.
“Now my little lamb, you’re going to be a good girl and take my cock, yes? Yes, you’ll be my good girl.” Oh god, his voice. His fucking voice. It was so rough, so deep. 
“You’re going to be polite, and you’re going to do everything daddy tells you to, got it? Or else I’ll have to punish you, and I don’t want to have to do that..” he trailed off, unbuttoning and unzipping his jeans, pulling them down to his knees. 
“Yes K-Kai…” you muttered. Kai wasn’t happy with that answer. He slammed you against the bed, crawling on top of you as he practically ripped off your shirt. You wanted to squirm away, but he held you so tight that you couldn’t get out of his grip. 
“You’re- y-you’re hurting me-'' you cried, looking up at him with wide eyes, for the first time, truly afraid of the man on top of you. 
“You can call me a lot of things in bed. Kai isn't one of them.” He growled, breath hot against your face.
“Daddy for example.. or divine ruler.” He put extra emphasis on the latter, which could only make you assume he preferred that one.
“I-I’m sorry d-divine ruler-“ you sniffled, eyes welling with tears as you swallowed hard. Much to your relief, Kai let up, letting go of you and sitting up.
“I think I know a better way for you to apologize.” He grinned, pulling his boxers down. You couldn’t help but glance down… and what you saw made your core flutter.
His cock was thick, hard, and leaking pre-cum from the tip. His large hand was wrapped around it, stroking it slowly as he watched you watch him.
“Well…?” He said, looking at you like you were stupid. And maybe you were. Maybe you were stupid for even being with him. For being in this situation. But right now all you could think about was his thick cock down your throat.
You carefully reached a hand out to stroke him, his length so girthy that your fingers barely reached fully around it. It was definitely going to hurt when he put it inside of you. If it even fits, that is.
You lowered your quivering lips to the tip of his cock, pressing a gentle kiss to it. You weren’t exactly scared, just… a bit nervous. You hadn’t done anything like this before and you weren’t exactly sure what to expect. Especially with Kai.
Kai hummed his approval, looking down at you as he tapped his thick cock head against your lips, urging you on.
“Come on baby, be a good girl for me, yeah? Be so good and maybe you’ll get rewarded.” 
You had no choice but to listen. Kai was like a drug. Addictive. You couldn’t just stop. That’s not how it worked with him.
You enveloped the head of his cock between your lips, sucking on it like a lollipop. That’s what you’d seen in the very few porn videos you’d watched. 
You felt a bit better about it all when Kai groaned above you, adam’s apple bobbing in his throat as he tilted his head back again. He looked sinful. Beautiful. 
“Goooood fucking girl. Keep going, choke on it.” And you did. Kai pushed into your mouth further, causing your throat to close up and your gag reflex to start. He didn’t care, nor did he stop. He fucked into your throat, holding your hair tightly in his grip as he let his cock slide in and out of your awaiting mouth. You were sure your throat would be bruised after this all. 
This went on for a few minutes before Kai seemed satisfied. Tears fell down your face, smudging your mascara. Your lips were puffy and swollen, and your throat was scratchy, a lingering taste of… man on your tongue.
“Very good girl for me, for your divine ruler.” He crawled back over you again, hands roaming across your body as his deft fingers unbuttoned your pants, pulling them off in one quick motion. You suddenly felt very vulnerable in only your bra and panties.
“Don’t hide from me, you’re gorgeous.” He spoke, seeming to sense your embarrassment. He seemed to know everything. Always one step ahead.
He nearly ripped your panties off as he tugged them down your legs, leaving your lower half completely bare to him. Exposed. Your heart fluttered hard in your chest, beating a million miles a minute as you tried to keep your legs closed.
Kai clicked his tongue in distaste, immediately shoving his way between your thighs, placing his thick cock head at your entrance. That’s when you realized he wasn’t even going to prep you on his fingers first. What an asshole.
“K-Kai-i'm not-“ you tried to speak, but he dismissed you, his dick brushing against your clit which sent a pleasurable spark through your body. It was soon diminished by the searing pain of him stretching you completely open on his cock.
“Hush my little lamb. You were made for this. Made to take me. Take my seed.” He whispered against your ear, breathing labored as he continued to push into you.
Your eyes were squeezed shut, a few tears managing to slip as you cried quietly. It hurt. It was an odd pain. One that wasn’t easily explained. Almost searing, but dull. Not completely unbearable but not nice either.
“Gooooood fucking girl.” He cooed, the praise making you perk up a bit. He had pushed himself into the hilt and was just resting against you, being nice enough to let you adjust. 
He didn’t kiss you. Didn’t really do anything, just waited a few minutes to give you the chance to calm yourself. To adjust to the foreign feeling of him inside of you.
He did finally pull out and you glanced down between your bodies, gasping as you saw his cock was covered in a thin layer of blood. Your blood. You were bleeding.
“K-Kai-“ he could have reprimanded you for using his name, but he sensed your worry and shook his head, hands rubbing over your thighs comfortingly.
“It’s normal.” He said casually, beginning to rock back into you gently, a grunt falling from his lips.
“Not all women bleed. Some do. It just depends.” He whispered, pressing a kiss to your forehead.
This really was a new side of Kai you hadn’t seen before. He was careful. Caring. Gentle. Attentive.
“There we go, you’re loosening up, feel it?” He thrust into you a bit more and you gasped. It still hurt a bit, but there was something else too. A tingling sensation, a pleasurable buzz. It felt good.
Kai began to find a steady rhythm. In and out, in and out, in and out. Over and over and over. Each time he thrust full into you, his pelvis brushed against your clit, and it felt so so good. His cock didn’t feel magical, it just made you feel very very full. It was an interesting feeling that would surely take some getting used to to truly enjoy.
Kai was beginning to fall apart above you, you could tell. His face was scrunched up, his hips were beginning to falter, and he was letting out groans and moans left and right.
“Fuck, that’s it, so good baby girl, being so good for your divine ruler. Bet you’d do anything I asked, huh?” Jesus, he talked a lot. He never shut up it seemed, but you found yourself not minding. 
His hand reached down between the two of you and a look of confusion crossed your face before you realized what he was doing. The pleasure suddenly felt 10x stronger as his thumb circled your clit, applying just the right amount of pleasure to get you trembling.
“I feel- I- I feel-“ you stuttered, unable to exactly describe it. You felt like you were going to orgasm, but with Kai inside of you it felt… different. Stronger in a way.
Your pussy began to clench around his length, the slick squelching sounds filling the room along with Kai’s pants and mumbles under his breath.
You didn’t even see it coming. Didn’t have time to brace yourself before your orgasm was crashing over you like a tsunami. Wave after wave. You felt like you were drowning. It was hard to breathe. You’d never felt such pleasure in your life.
As you came down from your high, you were briefly aware of Kai’s final, loud moan before he stilled inside of you, filling you up with his warm seed. It felt so nice that you almost forgot that he hadn’t worn a condom and had just come inside of you…
“Kai you just-“
“I know. And if this goes according to my plan, you will be the mother to my messiah baby.” You were so hazy that you barely processed his words. You just nodded, relaxing into the bed. You’d clean up later. You were too tired to get up and even if you found the strength, you figured your legs would give out on you.
You’d surely be sore in the morning, and maybe even… pregnant? But you guess it had all been worth it, getting to have your virginity taken by your very own divine ruler.
840 notes · View notes
livingemkayde · 9 months
Text
strange
din djarin x f!reader | 3.1k
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↳ warnings: this is rated for 18+ only! minors, please do not interact. smut, unprotected pinv, fingering f!recieving, mentions of oral m!recieving, fluff, no use of y/n. let me know if i forgot anything.
↳ a /n: hey everyone. taking a small break from my joel miller fics and coming back to my roots with this one. just needed a break and this was a super fun one shot to write. gonna post the final chapter to chaser really soon. thanks for all the support!! i love you all smsm.
if you would like to read more of mine: masterlist!
“Say it.”  You started breathing heavy. And you knew, when he tugged you around to look down at you, a hand coming to grasp your shoulder, the part where it meets your neck. You knew what he wanted, and you bit the bullet. “Teach me.”
It's honestly quite strange, if you really think about it—which oftentimes, you try not to. 
You wait for him, and he always comes back. Always. Maybe this was the dreaded exception that will turn his perfect ten times out of ten he always comes back, to nine times out of ten he always comes back. 
You sit there, in the hull, with the kid. Approaching the three week mark since your warrior left. 
You remember seeing him out of the Crest, several feet from where you sit now. 
“Be good,” he whispered to the little one, and placed him in your arms. 
“And be safe,” he said to you, almost in a stern voice, his hands brushing yours when he passed the child to your arms. 
“Be smart,” he emphasized, a little too serious for your liking. 
Be smart, above all else. You knew what it meant. Don’t be a hero, use your better judgment. He always does that. 
Be good… be safe…be smart. 
Then he always pats your waist, feeling the blaster’s outline through the fabric of your dress. And he always gives you a curt nod, and rubs a leather thumb over your hip. A small touch, in passing. Maybe most people wouldn’t even think twice about it. But you do. It’s the only thing getting you through sleepless nights. 
It is strange. You finally decide in your head. 
The small agreement between you two. 
The Crest is mostly quiet.
Besides when the fresher makes that gurgling sound, or the exhaust sends a violent huff of air through the hull, or when the small moans coming from your own mouth split through the silence. 
You guys don’t, under any circumstances, speak about it. 
You wouldn’t even know what to say, honestly. 
You remember the first time, when you had gotten a little too brave with your words and he was getting a little too comfortable around you.
“Teach me how,” you said. The hull was dark but not pitch black and the kid was locked in his pram in the cockpit. 
“You don’t know how to shoot a blaster?”
“No.” you reached over, grabbing his own from the crate between you. You held it up to the dim light and examined the markings. The rough edge of gunpowder. The shiny bits where his fingers lie. 
“Teach me,” you said again, pointing the blaster at an imaginary person to the left of him.
“You’re drunk,” he remarked. His gruff tone made your thighs shift closer together. 
“‘M not drunk,” you bit back. He shuffled in his crate until he was more comfortable. 
“You don’t know how to hold your liquor,” he pointed out. Resting his elbows on his thighs. You looked at him in the dark light. The yellow of the small bulb turned his helmet golden. 
You weren’t drunk. It was the truth. The spotchka only made your tongue loose, not your mind. 
“And I don’t know how to shoot a blaster,” you said, “what if someone broke in, and I needed to—”
“Don’t,” he said. Not mad, only scared of the possibility. You only know that now.
You stayed quiet, and continued to feel the weight of his weapon in your hand. He contemplated for a little, weighing the options in his mind, tossing the idea around inside the helmet. 
“What the hell,” he surrendered, standing and motioning towards the hull’s entrance, “C’mon.” 
You had followed him quickly, finding your place next to him on desert sands. 
“Hold it—” he said, pushing the blaster into your hands and raising your arms to the perfect distance, “—there.”
He stood behind you. You felt the cold bite of beskar brush against your back. Your breath hitched, so did his. 
“Don’t put your index finger on the trigger unless you want to shoot,” he said, moving your finger from the small flexed piece of metal and to the side of the blaster. 
“But I do want to shoot,” you said, tossing him a look over your shoulder. He grovels behind you. 
“Until the very second you want to shoot,” he muttered. “Got it?” 
“Yeah,” you said, looking at the weapon, almost transfixed by the way his hand holds yours. 
He reached down your body, by your waist, and touched you there, ever so gently. Your tense muscles made him hesitate. 
“‘S’okay,” you whispered, worried that if you said anything more it would scare him off forever. 
He didn’t say anything, just adjusted the angle of your hips and shifted the weight of your body. To your backfoot. 
“There,” he said, when he finally got you into the position he deemed fit. 
“Are you sure this thing’s not going to kick back and rip my arm off?” you whispered into the night sky. 
“It will—kick back. It was made for me, you’re too small. But I’ll—” he hesitated again. “I’ll hold you. If that’s okay.”
You couldn’t bring yourself to speak, just nod. So he held you, wrapped his arm around your waist, and you tensed up all the same. And his breath picked up behind you. 
You shot, and missed the scrap by a few feet, the plasma went down into the sandy ground and burned a hole there. 
“Dammit,” you mumbled. He didn’t let go. 
“Try again,” he said, touching you again, touching you more, and wringing your arms back up to firing position. 
“Farming was easier,” you joked, thinking about your previous job. 
“I’m sure it was,” he quips back, “Relax.” 
You tried, you really did. But he could feel that you couldn’t relax. Your tense muscles were taut under the leather of his gloves. 
“Sorry,” you whispered, maybe it was the spotchka talking this time, or maybe you really were sorry but you let it slip into the dark, humid air—
“No one’s ever…” 
No one’s ever touched you. Not like that. You wanted to say. 
He stayed quiet for a bit, not moving your body to the perfect position or teasing you. You remember feeling sick. 
But then he surprised you, and it was like breathing in fresh air for the first time after months of hyperspace. 
“Really?” he asked behind you, into your ear. Your eyebrows staggered and a line of elevens appeared between them. 
“Yeah,” you said, in a breathless kind of way. “Guess I never really got around to learning that one,” you tried to tease but he remained so quiet, so still, you had to push out a forced laugh. 
“Do you want to learn?” he said. Almost like he was not even really offering but just inquiring. 
But that little part of his voice, maybe, under all the modulation, told you otherwise. And you knew this wasn’t the spotchka talking. You were fighting a losing battle because that was all you, and months of pining after a faceless man who smells like pinewood, and gets your favorite snacks from the market, and makes you caf in the mornings—
“Yes,” you breathed out. 
A pregnant, tense, silence enveloped you. He was still behind you, and he still had his arm wrapped around you. Even when the arm holding the blaster dropped, he still had his arm there, holding your waist, and slowly dragging the heaviness of his hand down, down, downward. 
“Say it.” 
You started breathing heavy.
And you knew, when he tugged you around to look down at you, a hand coming to grasp your shoulder, the part where it meets your neck.
You knew what he wanted, and you bit the bullet.
“Teach me.”
So you guys don’t ever talk about it. 
In fact, you don’t really talk at all. Your invitation meant he showed you—taught you—in silent actions. He doesn’t talk when you fuck. The only sounds filling the silence are your desperate moans and the occasional whimper when he’s being particularly withholding. 
He doesn’t say anything. He doesn’t really make a sound. You’d be lying if the quiet, if the mask of him paired with his warmth didn’t make you dizzy, didn’t make you unravel in his hands. 
Because it did. 
But sometimes you’d wish he would say something, anything. Break the silence. Break up your wanton moans and just give you anything to work with. But you presume he doesn’t really do this often, and having him like that is better than having nothing at all. 
You shut the closure and push away the bassinet when you hear a clang! from outside the hull. 
You find your blaster under the fabric of your dress. You’ve never had to do this before. And you’re honestly scared. That night you begged him to teach you how to shoot, it was a secret hidden plea, maybe even flirting. You never thought you’d be the only thing separating the kid from possible danger. 
“C’mon, Mando,” you whisper to no one in particular. Maybe the maker. 
And then, suddenly, the ramp to the hull lowers and you raise the blaster, just like he taught you. 
The business end comes face to face with a shiny helmet and you let out a sigh of relief, dropping it to your side. 
His head cocks to the side like he’s saying, really?
You just stand, breathless, and push the kid’s pram up into the cockpit so Mando can get the bounty in safely. 
He’s dragging it behind him, deadweight and you gulp back an anxious breath. 
When he’s done, he turns to you. Looking at the blaster in your hands. 
His head tips again—really…?
“Yes, okay?” you say, throwing your hands up, shoving the blaster into his chest. It lands there with a small thunk!
“Three weeks, Mando. You were gone almost a month. I thought— I —,” you say, running your hands through your hair. 
“He knew how to hide,” is all he says, and that makes you laugh. The possibility of it all, the what if, leaving your body with a tense laughter at his sorry excuse of a joke. 
He grabs you then, suddenly, pulling you towards his chest. You know the routine. You both miss each other after longer hunts, even if you never say anything about it. Never say anything at all in fact. 
Din’s grabbing at your shirt, moving it up. And grabbing at your pants, moving them down. You pull at his chestplate, and his pauldrons, anything you can find. But he’s desperate. Way too desperate. This time, things feel different. 
You moan when his now ungloved fingers find wet cotton. He pulls them down too. 
He holds you, forcing you to look up at him while his calloused fingers find your swollen clit. You jump, yelp, whimper. He stays stoic. Though, this time, you can hear his heavy breathing. 
You both find the bunk, somehow. And instead of flipping you over, so you’re on your stomach, taking it like that and pushing your head down into the mattress, he leaves you on your back. You question him silently with your eyes but he doesn’t say anything—like always.
He just cups you again, feeling the growing wetness there, almost pushing a finger in, inching to the first knuckle but then he backs away and you whine. 
But he reaches down, pulls himself out of his pants and spreads your slick all over the velvety softness of his own length. It makes you gasp. 
You spread your legs for him, subconsciously. The red tip of his head looks at you menacingly. He’s big. He’s always been big, but you’re not afforded to look at his length often unless you go down on him, which is rare. 
Din climbs over you, a warm hand comes to grasp your tit and you swallow breathless moans in the back of your throat. His helmet shines golden, like all those nights before. The first night. Where he taught you that a man surrounded by beskar can be so soft, maybe even loving. 
When you start squirming, he notches his tip at your entrance, you freeze waiting for him to sink in, but he holds you there. You just whine in response. 
You grab at him, desperate. Pulling him in. To your surprise, he obliges. He sinks in, almost all the way, until you clench around him so tight he freezes. Your gasp at air. It feels like your brain is foggy and all you can see behind your blinking vision is his black visor. 
He sinks in more, you clench around him more. Three weeks is the longest you’ve gone without having him since the first night all those months ago. 
He stays there, while you try to relax around him. Just breathing under the modulation. You can hear him more clearly now, face to face. 
You have never fucked Din like this. 
Not face to face. Not with him waiting for you, not with such a tight fit. Aside from that fateful first time. 
You clench around him again. You moan again, into his space, into the small, tight, crampedness of the bunk. 
“Shit.”
You freeze. You don’t look into his visor, not right away. You lay there, frozen, with his hard cock notched halfway inside you. 
His hands tighten on your waist and you both wait there, with shallow panting breath. 
When you look up at him, he’s motionless. You might be worried that he’s turned to stone. But you plead him with your eyes—whatever you want to do, talk more, fuck me harder, stop right now and never speak of it, just — do it. 
And for a split second, it does cross your mind that he might pull out or maybe even kick you out. But that little part deep down inside you likes to think it might be different this time. That he really might utter another forbidden word or fuck you harder. 
The thought makes you clench around him again. 
To your surprise he moans a little. Something small, barely there. Almost like a — ngh from deep under modulation. But you hear it. And the sick part of you clenches around him again just to draw out something more. 
“Relax,” he huffs. It almost sounds loud, despite his whispering. But you know that’s just because he’s never done this. Never spoken when so close to you. Never spoken while he’s inside you.
You don’t even register the content of his words, just the sound of him making you tense up again. 
“Fuck,” he breathes, his helmet comes down to rest beside your head. He stays there, folded over your body. You’re still so tense it almost hurts. 
“Sorry,” you whisper out. Your voice is hoarse from lack of use the past couple of weeks combined with your panting breath. You don’t really know what else to say. 
He moves suddenly, bringing his hand down between your bodies and touches your inner thigh, inching up towards where his coarse hair almost meets your swollen clit. 
“I said relax,” he mumbles, his thumb touching your clit ever so slightly. Your hips buck and he pushes them down again. 
“Sorry,” you repeat. He just hums.
You don’t really know what to do. This is different. This is new. You wait for him to set the pace. Establish the rules. 
He starts circling your clit, he rubs through your lips to find wetness there. You try to relax into the mattress and as you do, he inches further into you. Breaking you open, splitting you in two. 
“C’mon,” he groans when you let him sink further, “Open up for me, baby,”
It eggs you on. He’s never done this, let alone call you anything besides your name. It sends a shooting pleasure to the point he keeps rubbing under his thumb and he can feel it. How you get impossibly wet and open around him until he finally sinks in to the hilt. 
“Fuck, Din,” you moan out, when he starts thursting. 
He’s groaning. You can hear it, under his breath. You feel lightheaded almost, though, it’s good to know being apart affects him in the same way. Makes him as desperate as you feel. 
You’re close then, his sounds inching you towards that white light dancing across your vision. You clench around him and he moans again. 
“You close?” he says, almost experimentally. You can barely get out your strangled yes. 
“I —” you want to say, but he’s picking up the pace, chasing after his own release. 
I missed you. You think to yourself. But maybe that’s too much, too soon. 
“What? Pretty girl — what…” he cuts himself off with a groan. Like he doesn’t know how to control his speech, his breathing. Himself. Not like this. Not when everything is new and so fucking good. 
“I mi—” you can’t say it with your staggered breathing. He’s brushing up against that spot that drives you crazy. You both know it. 
You come, without saying it. Your vision goes white and dark at the same time. A sheen of sweat covers your body. You don’t know what to do with your arms, becoming slightly limp. It sounds like he can’t hold on much longer when you get tighter around him, it spurs him on and you know he’s not far behind. 
He’s mumbling something in your ear. You really can’t hear it under the helmet. You turn your head, 
“Hm?” you mumble, he groans again. 
“Missed — ngh — missed you. Sweet girl,” he says, then he comes, hot and thick, notching himself into you, anchoring himself to you forever. 
You moan through it, so does he. 
He collapses down next to you, you can feel the remnants of him leaking out between your sticky thighs. 
You try to unscramble your thoughts. Din hasn’t come back new. Just unlocking a part of him that you’ve never seen. Or, that he’s never let himself show. 
He does something else new, something you’ve never seen him do, let alone do with anyone else. It makes your heart beat so fast you’re worried he might feel it through the armor. 
You gasp, when you hear the quiet hiss of his helmet unlock but he cuts you off when he pushes the lip of the mask up just enough so he can kiss you. 
_
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