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ithebookhoarder · 2 years

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Reunited (Obi-wan Kenobi x Ex-Jedi Reader)

Summary: What if, like Ahsoka, you were forced to leave the Jedi Order? And Obi-wan comes to find you again after Order 66?

A/N: Thanks to the anon who requested this as I was already working on something similar given the pain the new Kenobi series has caused me. I actually cannot with life, right now. So I apologise in advance for the possible avalanche of Kenobi content coming y’alls way. I am still working on all the other requests I have though! I promise ❤️😅

Masterlist:

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I feel he’d have been conflicted about whether or not to leave with you, after you chose to make your own way in the world without the order. After all, we know how much he cared for Satine, and he didn’t leave the order for her (even if he said he would have, had she asked) but you couldn’t ask him.

You can’t blame him for choosing to stay, given how much the Jedi order means to him and the promises he made to Qui-Gon, regarding Anakin who is like a brother and son to him.

He couldn’t abandon him or his duty to defend people with the republic - it’s who he is, and he wouldn’t be the man you’d fallen in love with if he did.

That doesn’t mean it wouldn’t hurt though, that you wouldn’t have felt pain and rejection to leave, knowing he won’t come with you.

But you learn to make peace with it.

You’d start your life over and for a while, no matter where you end up, you’d find a new way of existing without the Jedi order and without Obi-wan

However, no matter where you ended up, there would be no way you didn’t hear what had happened to the Jedi following Order 66. News like that spreads fast, even to the very edges of the outer rim.

You’d also feel it, the great unbalance in the force - the pain and suffering being inflicted as they are all but erased.

As soon as you hear the news, you’d have been distraught. You wonder what has happened to your friends, your family… after all, you knew connections and attachments were forbidden but it had been impossible not to form them with the group of people you spent every waking minute beside. It doesn’t make any sense and you feel anger and guilt at not being there to help them or protect them.

You also struggle to understand what had happened and how no one had seen it coming. It would leave you questioning everything you knew or remembered about your time there as you try to make it make sense.

However, it is only when Obi-wan one days appears on your doorstep that you are able to understand what truly happened.

You want so badly to be angry at him, to scream and shout and throw things, but the broken man that stands before you wouldn’t be able to handle that.

There are tears swimming in his eyes that he won’t let fall because he knows once he lets them he won’t be able to stop the flow.

You’re standing there and he’s wanted nothing more than this moment but he can’t move. He’s afraid that if he tries to reach out to you, to touch you, you’ll disappear like everyone else in his life.

“Obi…”

He lifts his head, a sad ghost of a smile tugging at his lips. “Hello, Y/N.”

You can’t help it. Both of you would break down in each other’s arms, utterly consumed by too many emotions to even try and begin to process them.

Eventually, you’d compose yourselves long enough to invite him into your home.

Busying yourself with making tea and tidying up the place you’ve made your own is a good distraction as you try to fully comprehend the fact that the man you thought you’d never see again is sitting across the room from you. In a way, it feels like old times, even down to the fact you have his favourite blend of tea (a fact he doesn’t mention aloud, but you see his eyes brighten in recognition of the smell as he takes his first sip)

It also makes it easier for him to begin trying to tell you the tale of everything that had happened since you’d left the Order; the words flow easier without your eyes on him, even if you are still giving him your undivided attention, listening closely as you continue stirring your tea over and over and over.

As the story nears its tragic conclusion, you can no longer stand there. You find yourself drawing closer until you are sat beside him, hands holding his as the tears pour from his eyes.

“I… I killed him… I left him there, writhing in agony… and it was all my fault.”

“No. No, Obi. It wasn’t.”

“I should have seen it coming.”

“How could you? Not even Master Yoda himself could have foreseen it. Chancellor Palpatine… he tricked us all, and he manipulated Anakin - turned him against us.”

“But by using doubts I did nothing to prevent. Nothing to soothe! That was my job - that was the promise I made and I failed.”

The tea is soon forgotten, replaced by whatever supply of alcohol you have stashed away (yet another sign of how much the world has turned upside down. After all, Obi never liked to drink if he could help it, and even then it was normally as part of a mission or social event that he’d agree to partake… to see him consuming the bottle in his hand like it was water is a peculiar sight) However, given what he has seen and endured, it isn’t hard to understand.

“So, Luke is on Tatooine?”

Obi nodded slowly. “Yes… with his uncle, where he’ll hopefully be safe and far away from those who wish him harm, or to use him for their own purposes. Leia is with Bail on Alderaan.”

You agree then and there to help watch over the boy. It is the least you can do for him, and his parents… both of whom you’d loved beyond comprehension. The mere thought of Padmé’s pain and grief is enough to finally tip you over the edge and into another bottle of drink.

Together you’d grieve… for your friends, for Anakin, and for the time you’ve lost… You simply let it all out, emptying yourselves as you fall apart into a thousand pieces. That way, when you wake the next morning, you can both begin the task of putting yourselves back together again… to construct a new world, a new reality for you both - together. At last.

It would take some time and adjustments, to learn to live with one another but you’d eventually get there.

You adapt to the fact that you two can now be together, without the need to hide your relationship.

You start to remember what it is to laugh at things, to feel joy and not feel guilty for it.

You also begin to find your own identities, your own purposes, without the Order or the Jedi.

#obi wan kenobi #Obi-Wan Kenobi #obi wan x reader #obi wan #obi-wan #obi-wan X reader #obi-wan x you #obi-wan x y/n #obi-wan kenobi x reader #obi-wan kenobi x you #obi-wan kenobi show #star wars #star wars x reader #obi wan x you #Obi Wan Kenboi #masterlist #ithebookhoarder #thesilentmage #ewan mcgregor

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r-2-peepoo · 1 year

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Could you imagine how angry Cody would be to find out that Anakin is Darth Vader and what he made the 501st do? Especially after finding out that everything he did after the fall of the republic/rise of the empire was because of what is essentially a slave chip made him and his brothers do? Commander Cody didn’t willingly betray the Jedi, the Republic, and most importantly his vod, but Anakin Skywalker sure enough did.

I am so late replying to this so I am so sorry for that but anon you are so real for this!!!! Thank you for being brave enough to say it.

I can’t even imagine the anguish and the pain Cody already endures on a daily basis because of things he’s been forced to do, but to find out that Anakin had the freedom to choose and he not only chose to hurt people, but he also did so while using the clones against their will???

Cody hates that man, I just know it. Maybe he had a minor issue with him during the war but tolerated it for the sake of duty and for Obi Wan’s sake too, but now, after Order 66, knowing everything Anakin has done, he hates him. He hates him as much as Cody can hate anyone, for all the brothers he’s lost and for what Obi Wan was put through and for all the people he doesn’t even know who have been hurt by the Empire. His people and culture along with the Jedi, the only people to consistently treat the clones with respect, have been effectively wiped out of existence and Anakin played a major role in allowing that to happen. It’s not just that they were killed, it’s like they were never there to begin with.

Anakin had things in his life Cody could only dream about and it was still never enough for him. He had so much and still wanted more. All Cody has ever had are his brothers and he can probably barely even wrap his head around that part. Having nearly everything you want and not being happy with it.

And imagine if he knew that Anakin had once been a slave on Tatooine too. That he knew what it was like to be forced to act against your will and have your freedom taken away, and yet, when given the choice to be better, he chose to continue that cycle of abuse.

And then there’s the fact that Order 66 was only possible because of Anakin. If he’d stayed back when Mace asked him too, Mace would’ve defeated Palpatine (which he was about to do) and Order 66 would’ve never happened. So Cody was forced to try murder Obi Wan, someone he genuinely cares about, because of Anakin.

This could’ve been such a fascinating dynamic and I truly wish that it had been explored at some point. I need to see a clone’s opinion of Vader and there is no one better for that than Cody.

#commander cody #darth vader #anakin skywalker #clone wars #obi wan kenobi #star wars prequels #codywan

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marvelstars · 8 months

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You wanna know what I find ironic. That I love both characters Anakin and Vader yes they are one and the same but they are also different. It’s pretty funny that they’re both my favorite characters, however almost separate entities.

Me too, I love both in their own way :)

I see Anakin as the main personality, the person he is with all his flaws and virtues, the one who gave without expecting recompense, the one who loved his friends and family, the one who believed compassion is unlimited love for everybody, who just wanted to do good for the galaxy, the one who became bitter with the Jedi, enraged for his mother torture and death, bitter and resenful of the Jedi and Republic tacit aceptance of Hutt rule, while Vader is him consumed by the darkside, in star wars this isn´t just an expression, the darkside is something that can overtake your will, a darkness that takes your needs, fears or even dreams and twist them beyond recognition, this was the original role of the Emperor, he represented the devil that keep Vader chained to him and to his will.

This is why Lucas talks about Vader as pathetic because he no longer had the strenght on his own to make decisions for himself in the OT, to try to break free of the DS, after his original aceptance of the Emperor´s offer and accepted his part in destroying the Jedi Order.

Post ROTS he is trapped, a slave of the Empire and Palpatine despite being one of it´s leaders but also a victim because he didn´t want this, he was quite purposely broken, groomed and manipulated into it. Lucas compares the darkside to a drug and the people that take it are still that same person but their decision making and perception is definitely compromised.

Many fans believe Vader "HATED" the Jedi, that he blamed them for everything, that he took pleasure in killing them and didn´t take responsibility, etc but they are so wrong, what keep chained Vader to Palpatine and the darkside was guilt and hopelessness he believed he was already condemned, the empire could be fixed but he could not, there was no fixing him, that he deserved the pain in which he lived and that there wasn´t any good left in him worth anything, that Obi-Wan was right in hidding his children from him even if it meant training them to kill him, because he was no longer fit to take care of anybody. THIS is what keep Vader a slave of Palpatine.

This is also why Luke started to turn him back to the light by making him remember himself, remember who you are, remember you can still be good, the "Emperor has not taken all the good out of you" Luke didn´t have all the facts but he knew Vader was a slave and that he was groomed by the Emperor to keep being that, that it was hopelessness, self hate and guilt not resentment and anger at the jedi, the thing that keep him chained to the DS and that´s why Luke gave him back his dignity by making him remember his NAME, by making him remember that he already had shown mercy to him and others at times, that he could still choose light and that Luke loved him whatever his decision was, unconditional love, just like the one Anakin used to have once upon a time, not just for his friends and family but for whoever needed his help at the time and this love was all Vader needed for him to free himself from the DS and become a hero once again, just one more time by freeing Luke and the galaxy from the Emperor´s, who he still loved and his own rule at the cost of his life. Vader was meant by George Lucas to be the Hero at the end of ROTJ, just like Luke was Vader´s hero. He is the Jedi that returned because Anakin returned and from this action with Luke the Jedi Order could come back once again.

Anakin and Vader are the same person but their experiences and perception are definitely different and to make himself whole again he needs to recognize each part of himself , this happened at the end of ROTJ as the novel said; for the first time in many long years, he loved himself again.

This is my take on them

Thank you for the ask. :)

#anakin skywalker #darth vader #darkside #luke skywalker #star wars #return of the jedi #phatom menace #attack of the clones #revenge of the sith #A new Hope #The Empire Strikes Back #long post

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bettsfic · 2 years

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alright i’ve given it 2 days to avoid posting spoilers but now it’s time for some Thoughts on the obi-wan kenobi finale.

(it goes without saying, spoilers ahead)

i can’t imagine how hard it is to write a sequel to a prequel. especially something as iconic as star wars, it’s such a tall order. i for one enjoy getting some of the gaps filled in with extra content, but i recognize nothing can really happen that hasn’t already been implied.

for example, we know obi-wan and anakin can’t kill each other. we know reva can’t kill luke. we know leia returns home safe. everything else is a wild card but ultimately the lead characters have to find harmony after the upheaval of the conflict, because a state of harmony is where we pick up in a new hope.

but we were given one thing, one huge thing that we didn’t already know for certain, that somehow, despite being sandwiched between two trilogies, moves anakin’s story forward:

he doesn’t blame obi-wan. he blames himself.

in revenge of the sith we leave anakin believing padme and obi-wan were conspiring against him. he blames them for allowing this to happen to him. his delusions of grandeur destroy his trust in those he loves most.

but now we know! for absolute certain! he doesn’t! blame! obi-wan!

there are so many implications here: that anakin has had time to introspect, that he knows obi-wan didn’t betray him, that he’s telling us anakin is dead and all that remains is darth vader, but it’s not true. there’s still some anakin there and we know this because of his sacrifice in return of the jedi.

if that shit doesn’t make you want to rip your own heart out and eat it, i don’t know what to tell you.

now let’s talk about obi-wan.

in star wars the concept of personal agency is flimsy. in large part this is a craft issue--we’re taught that in “good” movies characters have to get boxed into a corner in order to act. we see a pattern of characters acting out of desperation, with no other choice. even the effects of the dark side have a certain physiology, a physical disease that takes over them and causes them to act--we see it in both anakin and kylo ren. it’s not their fault they killed a bunch of people, it’s the dark side eating away at them. rey literally stabs the dark side out of kylo ren in the rise of skywalker.

you could argue that luke makes the choice to embark on an adventure in a new hope (and rey in the force awakens [but note that anakin never *truly* has a choice to go with obi-wan and qui-gon in the phantom menace. he’s ten years old and his mother is enslaved]), but i think being called to act is also an inciting predicament that denies choice. after all, if luke or rey say no, there’s no story.

but in the finale, both anakin and obi-wan decide to fight each other. even roken is like “you literally don’t have to do this, we’re going to be fine.” and obi-wan is all “yeah but i’m gonna.” and anakin doesn’t have to go there, in fact shouldn’t go there, but he does, because he needs to see obi-wan. that’s what the show is saying over and over, outright: he can only see obi-wan. they could have written the entire series without that final showdown. action-wise, the chase is high-stakes enough, and there’s already so much precedent to make vader the big bad on your tail and you escape his grasp by the skin of your teeth. that could have happened, and it wouldn’t have made a difference.

but the series works hard to develop character motivations by tying up the loose ends of the prequel trilogy. i think this is the big difference between plot-driven and character-driven stories. in plot-driven stories, the characters must act. in character-driven stories, the characters choose to act. this is the first live action star wars media that has given us a character-driven story, where nearly all the events happen because the main character makes them happen, and not because we’re already aware of the events that happen prior to and after the events of the series.

so neither of them go to the fight with the intention of killing each other. they know they can’t kill each other, because they are each other’s weakness (obikin: canon). the only conclusion i can really make is that they go there--against the advice of everyone around them--to see each other. maybe obi-wan goes to see for certain his “friend” is gone. maybe anakin goes just so he can tell him, it’s not your fault. maybe they just want closure, because the next time they meet will be the last.

#obi-wan kenobi #obikin #owk #meta #i'm sorry if this doesn't make any sense my brain is all blorbo no logic

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obiwanobi · 3 years

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I blame @quiet-oracle and @theevildevices for this, because I couldn’t resist the urge to write 2k of hurt/comfort for the ‘Jedi but enemies’ AU, where Qui-Gon trained Anakin, and now him and Obi-Wan are well-known for despising each other but working exceptionally well together when they’re not lost in ridiculous banters and petty arguments to hide the fact that they’ll be lost without each other;

Obi-Wan winces.

Skywalker’s hand immediately withdraws. “Does it bother you when I—”

“Yes.”

“You don’t even know what I was going to say!”

“The answer is still the same.”

Skywalker’s sigh is heavier than the entire Republic navy.

His mouth is too close to Obi-Wan’s shoulder, and he shivers as a result. But it’s only because the cold of the never-ending rain outside still lingers on their clothes and in their bones, even under the tent and close to the portable heater that a clone is still trying to adjust. And also because he’s been sitting there bare-chested for the past five minutes, with Skywalker’s clumsy fingers poking at his hip and ribs, probably way harder than necessary, just to see him suffer.

“I can apply a bacta patch myself, you can go n—”

“Would you please shut up? We both know a bacta patch wouldn’t be enough.”

Only the sound of a packet of antiseptic wipes being opened, gauze being stretched and the clone pushing buttons with no effect can be heard for a moment.

“I don’t think you’ve ever said ‘please’ to me before,” Obi-Wan notes lightly, then grimaces when Skywalker starts pulling on the cloth pressed to his side.

“Don’t get used to it. But if it’s the only way to make you stop being so difficult and contradictory all the time, I will gladly say it more.”

Instead of looking at his own wound —the pain in his hip is enough, thank you, he doesn't need to see the extent of the damages— Obi-Wan glances at Skywalker. Gaze focused and mouth in a thin line, there’s only concentration written on his face.

No one could guess that only half an hour ago, on the battlefield, panic and terror were the only two emotions Skywalker was projecting loud enough in the Force to bring Obi-Wan out of unconsciousness.

Unbelievable, Obi-Wan has thought once he was aware enough to realise that it was Skywalker's hands on his face and Skywalker’s voice in his ear, begging him to come back. He would find a way to be annoying enough to drag me out of a coma if he could.

Surprisingly, the thought has felt like a comfort.

The clone working on the heater stands up suddenly. Obi-Wan almost forgot about him. He nods his head towards them, and goes out of the tent at the exact same moment Hyoid enters.

At the sight of the clone, all modicum of appreciation for Skywalker evaporate.

“You called a medic?” Obi-Wan scowls, with the tone of someone who has just been the victim of a vicious mutiny.

“Of course I called a medic. Half of your tunic is covered in your own blood and you were knocked out for a while earlier, what do you think I was going to do? Tell you to go back out there and watch you slowly bleed to death?”

“Generals,” the medic calls. In vain.

“You would enjoy that,” Obi-Wan grumbles.

“Well, yes, but then the Council will ask me why I let you die just a few meters away from a first aid kit, and then I’ll have to explain that I gently push it away from your weak hands every time you reached for it, and how will I look, then?”

“Like someone who could have let me die on the battlefield and get away with it, but decided instead to choose the most idiotic and time-consuming option available, and I would have enjoyed that very much.”

“Generals.”

“Exactly,” Skywalker nods, “and I can’t let you enjoy things.”

“I know. Don’t think I never realised who was flushing the toilets every time I was in the shower when the hot water came back two days ago.”

“You were so cheerful,” Skywalker says, as if the mere thought disgusts him. “I took that as a personal affront.”

“Sirs, please,” Hyoid implores louder. Both Jedi turn towards him, almost surprised to see him there. “I’m just here to see General Kenobi’s injury, I’m sure you can continue your conversation right after. Sirs. Please.”

It takes them a second to realise that they’re sitting so close together that Obi-Wan’s hand has settled on Skywalker’s knee when they weren’t paying attention, while Skywalker’s fingers are still maintaining Obi-Wan’s pants low on his hip so it won’t come in contact with the long gash on his side. The intimacy of the scene isn’t completely lost on Skywalker, it seems, because he rushes to take his hands away and stands next to his chair, suddenly too self-conscious to know what to do with himself.

“I’m very sorry about him,” Obi-Wan apologises, as the medic takes Skywalker’s seat and starts assessing the mess Skywalker undoubtedly made of his hip and ribs. “He’s a rescue. He still has no idea how to behave appropriately in polite society.”

An outraged noise comes from Skywalker behind him, and despite the throbbing pain, Obi-Wan can feel the corners of his mouth turning up. A hiss replaces his smile rapidly enough when Hyoid applies a spray and starts cleaning what Skywalker missed, before pressing stingy patches on the wound.

The medic is wise enough not to reply to him, but it doesn’t stop him from making a comment or two about how ‘this isn’t superficial sir, you should be more careful from now on,’ or ‘you’ll have to change the bandages, and I’ll get some pills for you to take’ and ‘ok, now let’s see your head, sir, don’t think General Skywalker didn’t mention it’.

His head is, indeed, becoming heavier by the minute, and he can feel himself growing too tired to care enough to listen carefully after that. Once he gives up answering questions and lets Skywalker do it for him, Obi-Wan doesn’t even need to concentrate to feel him poking obnoxiously at him in the Force, testing the limits of his consciousness. It reminds him a bit of when Skywalker was a child, tugging on his robe every two minutes to make sure he was paying attention to him.

No wonder Obi-Wan always tried to avoid him.

“All right,” the medic finally says, pulling him out of his reverie. He stands up, seemingly satisfied. “I’ll get you your pills, and then you should rest.”

Rest sounds amazing. Obi-Wan would kill Skywalker for a good mattress and a soft pillow right now. But it doesn’t mean anything; he would probably kill Skywalker for two minutes of peace on the best of days.

The sudden silence that falls under the tent once Hyoid is gone seems almost unnatural. Obi-Wan doesn’t understand why the faint pitter-patter of the rain outside unsettles him so much, until he realises that it’s the first time since the battlefield that he’s alone with Skywalker.

“Are you going to keep sulking behind me?” Obi-Wan asks, finding his robe discarded on the floor and wondering if it’s worth leaning down to get it. No reply comes. “Well, you heard the medic. You can go now. I, unfortunately for you, will still live to see another...” he trails off as two arms slide over his shoulders from behind, wrapping around his neck and resting there.

Skywalker is warm against him.

For a second, Obi-Wan thinks he’s finally going to strangle him, but a golden head falls on his shoulder gently, face hidden by a cascade of curls, tickling Obi-Wan's neck and collarbone.

“Skyw—”

“Don’t be an insufferable asshole for a minute,” Skywalker mumbles, breath hot against his bare skin. “Just let me have this.”

Ah. It’s one of those moments, then.

He thought they were done with that for the day after what happened on the battlefield. Earlier.

With Skywalker’s face looming over him. Eyes so wide and so blue. One hand pressed against the wound in his side to stop the bleeding, one hand twisted in Obi-Wan’s tunic, right above his heart.

Being the one injured and barely conscious, but also being the one calming Skywalker down. Managing to get him to release his death-grip on him. Assuring him that he wasn’t going to die.

Promising it.

Twice.

Soothing the Hero with No Fear as he would soothe a lost and abandoned child.

“I told you already,” Obi-Wan says quietly. It feels wrong to speak louder when he knows they won’t look at each other for some time after that. “It’s all right. I’m fine now. It’s over.”

The arms around him tighten, mirroring the weight of Skywalker’s presence in the Force around Obi-Wan.

“I thought you’d left me,” Skywalker says accusingly, sounding remarkably like his nine-year-old self. “I thought you’d left me behind again.”

Obi-Wan closes his eyes, as if not seeing it would erase the fact he’s indulging his instinct to nuzzle his face against Skywalker’s hair. He smells like the rain, muddy but fresh, and feels like lingering distress in the Force. It’s far from pleasant to remain close to such an unbalanced mind, and their position isn’t comfortable either. But Obi-Wan doesn’t shiver from the cold anymore. So they don’t move.

They’ve earned that second of weakness.

Obi-Wan’s hand comes up to scratch at Skywalker’s head gently, fingers tangling with unruly locks of hair. Slowly, his muscles relax and he leans into the touch, chest slumped against Obi-Wan’s back. Skywalker’s face turns towards his throat, nestled under his jaw, before exhaling, deep and warm. In the Force, Skywalker’s signature curls against Obi-Wan’s and quiets down to a low satisfied rumble, dragged away from dread and terror one caress at a time.

Obi-Wan’s mind is suddenly way too tired to be bothered by the tenderness of it all.

“I’m here now, with you,” he whispers in his hair. “That’s all that matters.”

It’s a quiet apology that Skywalker accepts with a satisfied humming noise that resonates in Obi-Wan’s whole body.

It feels a bit like an apology for more. For everything. For all the times he avoided and pushed him away as a child. For condemning him for reasons he didn’t want to admit to himself. For wanting to blame him, for taking his master away, for being such a better padawan than he was, for rubbing it in his face.

For wanting to be his friend, always.

Obi-Wan has been wrong for so long.

When the medic comes back, Skywalker is kneeling in front of the heater, cursing it quietly, and Obi-Wan is adjusting his robe around his shoulders with slow movements.

“All right, sir, this is what you’ll have to take before every meal,” Hyoid says, showing him a small bottle, before putting a white box on the table. “And these are the bandages and the bacta to change every day. I would advise you not to do it yourself, and if you don’t have anyone to—“

“I’ll do it,” Skywalker declares without looking up, and Obi-Wan immediately narrows his eyes.

“You? I can’t even trust you with my toothpaste tube, what makes you think—“

“I don’t care what you say Kenobi, there is no wrong way to squeeze toothpaste!”

“There is, and you do it on purpose. What kind of savage would squeeze it right in the middle—”

Skywalker suddenly turns towards Hyoid, talking over him. “How many pills would it take to be considered a lethal dose, do you think?”

It is, of course, the one comment that ignites a virulent and pointless argument that makes the poor medic reconsider all his life choices and wonder if chloroforming Jedi generals would get him court-martialed.

After seven minutes of a loud and dramatic dispute ending with Skywalker promising to never take part in anything related to Kenobi anymore, except maybe his funeral, Hyoid decides to risk it.

#anakin: I can't believe I have to tenderly tend to this bastard's wounds #and take care of him for the rest of our lives #everyone: you don’t have to #anakin: no no I’m gonna #so when are they furiously kiss each other in the middle of a screaming row #obikin #clem's aus #fic i did write #jedi but enemies au

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smhalltheurlsaretaken · 3 years

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In continuation to this post about Dooku’s stupid sad face, let’s wallow some more! This man is the worst and I wish he’d quit breaking my heart.

Much like being ordered to use his connection to Yoda to try and destroy him visibly broke Dooku’s heart (no, I’m not kidding, I promise there’s evidence for that, please check it out, oh my gosh Dooku why are you like this), being told to get rid of Ventress clearly hurt him so much.

There is just so much to talk about here. There are several key things in this episode (s3ep12 - Nightsisters). For one thing, after Dooku kneels to Sidious in the first scene, we never see him standing up again - except to kneel again, or when we see him through a com. So ‘Lord Tyranus’ is, in fact, nothing more than a beaten dog, whose only power is an image - that is, a mirage. It’s a nice touch, and a good reminder that those who follow the Dark Side are, in fact, nothing but slaves - and most notably, they are slaves to themselves, which is what happens here.

Dooku does not want to give up Ventress. He readily admits that she is important to him - and isn’t that foolish? Why would you ever tell a Sith Lord that there is something in the Galaxy beside yourself that you value? What’s more, he immediately interjects when Sidious says that she is ‘too important.’

To question his Sith Master like that is reckless and dangerous. Dooku is cunning, calculating, and most of all, self-serving - so for him to speak out like this means he couldn’t help himself. That’s how much he valued her. Unfortunately, the Dark will always make you value yourself more. Indeed, when Sidious questions his loyalty - loyalty that is nothing but a sham, which they both know, because the way of the Sith is to stab each other in the back - Dooku is quick to say that he’d never train his own apprentice. (Which, you know, he does next episode when he gets Savage.)

But anyway, this is Dooku’s face right before he agrees to kill Ventress - and right before he bows - practically kowtows - to Sidious. It’s pure anger.

But he agrees nonetheless. None of his anger, none of his hatred, none of his rage give him any power at all. And so, to preserve himself - because again, that’s what the Dark Side makes you do - he bows like an animal. When Anakin holds on to people because he can’t bear not to have them in his life, Dooku cuts people off because he is endangered by his connections, because of the position he put himself into in his quest for power. (Which is again quite ironic - a man called ‘Lord’ greets the man calling him that with complete subservience.) They go about it differently, but they are both undone by selfishness (and it’s not me saying it, it’s Lucas).

The most heartbreaking part about all of this though? When Dooku casts Ventress off, he’s not angry, he’s sad and defeated.

Just look at his face when he calls her ‘child.’

He is framed as off-balanced and cracked, ffs! And just look at his eyes.

Listen to his voice in that scene! How slowly he talks, how regretful he sounds! He looks away when he tells her he’s ordered the troops to abandon her. And when he looks at her again, listen to how stiff and impersonal his words are, in direct contrast to his previous... well, gentleness.

To save himself, he destroys a part of himself. That’s Anakin’s story. That’s Maul’s story, that’s the story of the Dark - in trying to gain something for themselves, they give up what matters. Maul tries to gain power and loses his body, then tries to gain revenge and loses the remainder of his life to a pointless endeavor that will never fulfill him. Anakin tries to preserve himself from the pain of loss and ends up losing everything he holds dear to his own actions. Dooku tries to protect his own life, and in the end has nothing to live for, and eventually dies. They all hurt themselves through their self-centeredness.

Just go and watch how defeated Dooku is when he says “I have done as you’ve asked, Asajj Ventress is dead.” Just look at his eyes right here:

And the worst thing is: this is the second time this has happened. Because Dooku did not fall because of Qui-Gon’s death - he was already a Sith when Naboo happened (as per s6ep10, The Lost One + the AotC timeline that was already too tight for him to have fallen, become Sidious’ apprentice and killed Syfo-Dias after Naboo rather than before).

Dooku has been subjecting himself to the Dark - to his own base need for self-preservation - for over ten years at this point, and he keeps doing it. He keeps repeating the same mistakes, because no matter how much he loved Qui-Gon, or Ventress, or Yoda, when faced with the question ‘what do I choose between my own interest and the interest of someone I love’ the answer of the Dark is always: “I choose ME.”

And the consequence is always suffering, for all the parties involved.

It’s not a coincidence that this very ep shows us Ventress’ first Master - her real Master, in the ways that mattered - Ky Narec.

One looks at her with pride and love - the other with bitterness, and regret, when he can look at her.

One she looks up to with joy, absolute trust and equal love - the other leaves her terrified, betrayed and alone.

Just compare Dooku to Obi-Wan - who always tries his hardest to save the ones he loves instead of preemptively cutting them off (Qui-Gon in TPM, Satine in s5, Ahsoka on Mortis, Cody in s7, Anakin because the Mustafar duel was choreographed to show that he was trying to let Anakin tire himself out and cool down, Luke in ANH) - and more often than not fails, but still tries no matter the cost to himself - and who lets go of what he has lost instead of holding onto bitterness and anger. Compare Dooku to Yoda, who is ready to give up his own safety and happiness, who is ready to die to protect Anakin (again, not kidding, here’s when it happens) rather than to pursue the outcome he wants. Yoda and Obi-Wan die with smiles on their faces, at peace, because the key to it all - the difference between love and attachment, and between love and self-preservation, and between letting go and cutting off, and between true power and the lies of the Sith - is always selflessness.

Whereas the Sith are slaves to their selfish impulses, the Jedi have the freedom to say no, I’m not going to save myself, I’m going to do what’s right, and I will be happier for it no matter how much it cost me.

The whole point of this angstfest was to say: dammit, Dooku! He used to be wise enough and strong enough to know better, and he still did this to himself, and then dragged the entire Galaxy into chaos and darkness. And I love him so much, and this self destruction that is characteristic of the Sith breaks my heart.

#meta #my meta #dooku #count dooku #darth tyranus #darth sidious #sidious #sheev palpatine #asajj ventress #star wars: the clone wars #light vs dark #sith #sith stuff #long post

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calltomuster · 3 years

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Star Wars Fic Recs Part the Fourth

[first fic rec list] [second fic rec list] [third fic rec list]

Been a few weeks since I've done one of these and I've read/reread some great fics recently so let me share them with you now!

And I Fear Nothing by @maiseey (Obi-Wan/Cody, WIP, 11/? chapters, 43.4k words) Picture this: I am sitting in the parking lot of my local grocery store, having just bought a load of perishables. I get the email that And I Fear Nothing has just been updated. What do I do: run home to preserve the food I just paid for, or sit in my car and read the new chapter right away? The answer is obvious, of course! That is exactly the situation I found myself in last week when chapter 11 dropped and I did in fact choose to read it in spite of my groceries, that's how much I love this fic. In this fic, Obi-Wan and Cody are raising Luke and Leia together on Tatooine, and they've got so much trauma, and new + old wounds, and love for each other and the children they're raising that it both warms your heart and tears it apart. But that's not all, this fic expands beyond just the small home in the middle of the Jundland Wastes and explores Ahsoka and Rex and their journey to de-chip as many clones as possible. I love this fic because it doesn't shy away from hard conversations, but it does it in a way that makes you want to cry and give everyone involved a hug. Plus, there are some fantastic minor clone characters that you will 100% want to die for by the time you finish reading. Cannot recommend this fic enough.

Obligate by @communistkenobi (gen, one-shot, 23.9k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin & Ahsoka) Just when you thought the Deception arc didn't have enough pain, this AU sees Anakin fake his death instead of Obi-Wan! My heart is physically ripped out of my chest just thinking about this fic, so imagine what it'd do to you actually reading it. Anything @communistkenobi writes is so well-done and I've gone through his works list on AO3 multiple times, but somehow I missed this when it was first posted and it was like a wonderfully delightful surprise when I ran into it the other day. So, so good. Highly recommend!

Moirai by damonkey (gen, WIP, 4/? chapters, 9.2k words, Obi-Wan & Qui-Gon) All I can really say about this fic without giving anything away is that it's a Phantom Menace AU and it's so intriguing. The author is very deliberate in having a vague summary and only tagging as the story progresses, so I truly have no idea what's ahead of me but it's so -- as I said -- intriguing that I'm happy to strap into the ride. Ahhhh I'm skimming through the fic and there are so many things I want to mention but I don't want to give anything away!

Almost Home by @frunbuns (gen, one-shot, 5.2k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) You know, every time I recc a Modern AU I'm like "I don't usually like Modern AUs but..." and then proceed to gush over the fic. I went and checked and I've recced a Modern AU on almost every fic rec list I've made! Maybe I do like Modern AUs?? Or maybe the fics are just that good -- and this fic is definitely that good. In this fic, the first of a planned series of fics set in a modern Star Wars universe, Obi-Wan is reeling from the loss of his adoptive father Qui-Gon and has to care for a young Anakin. Ooooooof. Definitely hits you right in the feels, this one. Love the non-chronological storytelling too!

Naked and Not Paid by biscuitlevitation (Obi-Wan/212th Attack Battalion, WIP, 6/? chapters, 14.9k words) This fic is essentially ~15k words of the clones thirsting over Obi-Wan and it is the funniest thing I have read all year. I'm not kidding, I just read the last chapter which features space-church-lady!Anakin and I laughed so hard I cried. I'm cracking up just thinking about it. I promise you will have a good time reading this fic. And if the tag "Obi-Wan Kenobi/212th Attack Battalion" puts you off, let me just say there's no sex in this at all, it's just thirst. And it's hilarious.

Full Disclosure by @trixree (Obi-Wan/Cody, WIP, 2/3 chapters, 7.4k words) ROTS AU in which the Force bonds Obi-Wan has formed with a few members of the 212th save them from the chip and Order 66, but it doesn't stop the devastation from happening on a mass scale and they all have to try and deal with Mustafar and Luke and Leia. This fic manages to be both extremely soft and extremely gut-wrenching at the same time, and I wish I could leave more kudos. Full disclosure (get it, little pun there for ya), I will be dying until the final chapter comes out. Time to go listen to Olivia Rodrigo and reread this fic and just live in my feels.

Thirteen Days by @ewanmcgregorismyhomeboy12 (gen, one-shot, 4.1k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) Post-Zygerria arc, Anakin dresses an unconscious Obi-Wan's injuries and struggles. Ahhhh this fic is one of my favorite Zygerria arc fics, and given that that's my favorite arc, that's saying a lot! Obi-Wan doesn't say a word in this fic, but his presence is very much there, if you know what I mean. And the descriptions of injuries here are pretty graphic at times, but it's so good that you'll want to keep reading even if you have to do it through the fingers covering your eyes.

brother, let me be your shelter by @kenobilovebot (gen, one-shot, 1.6k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) This fic packs so much tenderness in a short amount of words. It covers an AU in which Obi-Wan's issues from Zigoola never really resolve, and Anakin finds out when -- well, you'll just have to read for yourself. I love Zigoola because it is such an excellent whumpfest for poor Obi-Wan and this fic is great for that, but also highlights Anakin and Obi-Wan's relationship.

A Padawan At War (Again) series by @itstimeforstarwars (gen, 3 parts, 100k words, Obi-Wan & Anakin) In this series, Obi-Wan and Anakin are transported from The Phantom Menace into the Clone Wars and have to deal with all that comes with it: fighting wars, discovering a Padawan you never knew you had, dueling your grandmaster who apparently is a Sith Lord now(?!) and all the rest. This series is a great ride, and I look forward to every update. Note: the first fic in this series is a one-shot that was expanded upon, and it drops you in media res. The second fic is a prequel that shows how they got to that point, and the third fic is the sequel that shows what comes after.

The Desert Storm series by @blue-sunshine-mauve-morning (complete, 24 parts, 1.144 million words) There has never been a better time to start reading this series. If you read Star Wars fics on AO3, then you've definitely seen the Desert Storm series before, but maybe you were daunted by the high word count, or felt like it would be too much effort to go all the way to the beginning of a series but couldn't just jump in halfway. Let me tell you, it's 100% worth it, and now is the perfect time to read this series if you haven't already. This series is complete, but it turns out it's all just Act 1 of the larger story, which will continue in the Rise and Fall series. @blue-sunshine-mauve-morning is taking a break right now before starting the next series, so you have ample time to get caught up, and YOU REALLY SHOULD. Let me tell you, this series had me on the edge of my seat more than any other piece of media I can remember. With the most recent chapters, where everything that has been building for a million words came to a head, I would get so worked up after each chapter that beforehand I would have to queue up calming things to watch afterwards, and it still wouldn't be enough and I'd be too full of feelings to get anything done the rest of the day. Seriously, this series is amazing. And if you HAVE read it before but haven't reread, now is the perfect time for that as well. I've reread this series multiple times and it's so rewarding because the author sprinkled in so many hints as to what will come that you only understand the second (or third) time around. I know I've written a lot for this rec but this is a long series and it deserves it. Go read! Now!

If you like any of these fics, please consider reblogging so they can get more exposure! And if you noticed I missed someone’s Tumblr account, or linked the wrong one, please let me know!

#star wars #fic recs #obi-wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #ahsoka tano #commander cody #qui-gon jinn #commander rex #jedi order #sw tcw

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tennessoui · 3 years

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Pleaseeee do 43 or 46. I love your work btw

(insert months late panicked noises about how I thought 45 was 'falling in love with best friend's partner' and so wrote hold me fast for it, but actually 43 is 'falling in love with best friend's partner' very whoops very my b)

so i did 43 again anyway, but in a modern au and where the couple is actually in love (but it is an obikin happy ending because kit did write it)

(wife is unnamed the entire time so no character bashing it could literally be anyone ive been calling her rebecca in my head lmao)

43. Falling In Love With Best Friend's Partner (2.7k.......)

Obi-Wan’s kettle goes off with a whistle right as there’s a fierce banging on the door. He almost drops his favorite mug in surprise, which puts him in a bad mood from the get-go. But for the love of Christ, who would come call at his house at nine at night? It’s more than rude; it’s downright indecent.

He stalks through the house until he can unlock the door to give the person on his porch a piece of his mind, but then he sees who it is.

It’s Anakin, and he’s crying.

If there’s anything that can make Obi-Wan quiet his temper on a normal day, it’s Anakin Skywalker. A distressed Anakin Skywalker brings out every ounce of his compassion.

“Anakin?” He asks immediately, stepping forward to touch the man on his arm gently and guide him inside. He doesn’t even have to suppress a sigh when Anakin doesn’t remember to toe off his shoes in the entry way--that’s how worried he is at Anakin’s tears and the way they only increase in frequency and sound when Obi-Wan moves his hand to his back and pushes him further into his house, all the way to the dining table where he urges him to sit down.

Anakin still hasn’t said anything resembling actual words yet, so Obi-Wan goes to the kitchen to make them both a cup of tea. It’s either that or give into the temptation to thumb the tear tracks off of his cheeks and that’s a little more revealing than Obi-Wan likes.

He’s not that brave, for one.

For another, Anakin is a married man. A man married to one of Obi-Wan’s closest friends, a previous grad student turned co-author of at least seven publications, with more on the way. He can’t risk tenderly wiping away her husband’s tears because Obi-Wan Kenobi has been at least a little in love with him since they were introduced four years ago, when he’d swanned up to him holding two champagne glasses in one hand and stuck out the other to shake. “My wife talks about you nonstop, Professor,” he’d said. “I used to be so jealous until I sat in on one of your lectures when I was still in school. Made sense then.”

Obi-Wan had not known what to do with that, but had taken the proffered champagne glass and assured this strange man he had nothing to worry about.

After all, Obi-Wan wasn’t the sort of man to chase after former students or people in marriages.

Over the next few years, however, it became quite clear to him that there was a big addendum needed in his moral code: people in marriages to former students drew his eyes apparently the way no one else has ever managed to in his life.

Or perhaps it was just Anakin. Perhaps it’s always been just Anakin.

Coming to terms with the shameful, quiet love he carried for a man who flirts like it’s second nature and always has a warm touch or word to bestow on Obi-Wan had been difficult, to say the least.

Anakin’s wife had been one of Obi-Wan’s closest friends. His inconvenient and persistent feelings for Anakin had turned her into one thing only: his wife. They could not be friends when Obi-Wan spends half his nights wondering what it would be like to sleep with his arms around her husband. They could not be friends when the last dozen times the married couple had invited him over for dinner, he had paid more attention to her husband than to the food or to the other topics of conversation or to her.

And she has to know. She has to know why their latest paper has taken eight months to write. She has to have seen the way Obi-Wan perks up so obviously when Anakin brings his wife her lunch, the way he has to turn away from their chaste kisses, the way he listens keenly to any information she gives him on her husband, the way he had excused himself from the room when he heard her tell another colleague that they were trying for children.

In academia, you learn fairly quickly that it is useless to resent someone for having what you do not. It seems that Obi-Wan has to learn this lesson all over again when it comes to people. It’s hard. It’s selfish. He hates that he loves Anakin. He hates that he loves Anakin the way he does, that it’s been four years and he still loves him, that not even his happy marriage, his love for his wife, the fact that his wife is Obi-Wan’s friend, can change it.

Anakin considers them friends now, which is so much worse and yet still more than a pathetic old man like Obi-Wan deserves. Worse, because when Obi-Wan had started rejecting dinners at the Skywalker household, Anakin had pushed back with worry. When he’d noticed that Obi-Wan’s lunch most often consisted of whatever cold cut sandwich was on sale at the gas station next to campus, he’d started bringing Obi-Wan a lunch along with his wife. When Obi-Wan had stopped responding to his texts, he showed up to drag him to a night out.

Worse, because being Anakin’s friend is nothing like being his husband, and the differences make him ache as much as the acts of kindness make him want to weep.

It’s still more than Obi-Wan deserves. He knows that intimately, the way he knows that nothing can ever happen between the two of them because Anakin loves his wife. And his wife--

“She cheated on me,” Anakin gets out between uneven breaths.

Obi-Wan promptly drops his favorite mug and watches it shatter on the floor.

“Oh!” Anakin exclaims at the loud noise, peeking around the corner, and looking like he’s about to offer to help. Obi-Wan shoos him out of the kitchen, and grabs the remaining mug of tea to follow him. The mess can wait for a later time.

“What did you say?” he asks carefully, nudging the mug over to Anakin, who wraps his hands around it.

Anakin blinks up at him wetly. “Don’t make me say it again.”

Obi-Wan drags his chair closer and dares to lay a hand over Anakin’s arm, watching his face for any negative reaction. Anakin just looks at it though, as if he can’t even comprehend it.

“Please, tell me what happened,” he entreats softly.

Anakin blinks and takes a sip of the tea. It’s chamomile, which is the only tea blend Obi-Wan knows Anakin likes.

“I, um.” Anakin clears his throat and reaches up to wipe at his eyes. Obi-Wan thinks his breath leaves his body for a second when he sees the slighter lighter ring of skin around Anakin’s fourth finger. He never thought he’d see what that sliver of skin looks like.

“I came back early from a work trip, cause. Um. Cause we’ve been having problems,” he starts with a quick side glance at Obi-Wan. “Just some fighting. Going to bed angry. I guess stuff you’re never supposed to do.”

Obi-Wan tries to arrange his face in an expression meant to convey that he definitely knows what stuff one is supposed to do in a marriage.

“So I thought I could, you know. Surprise her. But when I got in, there was someone else in the house. In our bed, Obi-Wan, she fucked someone else in our bed. I--” Anakin starts crying dropping his head into his hands and dislodging Obi-Wan’s arm completely.

“Oh,” Obi-Wan murmurs, at a loss for what to say. He settles for kneeling down next to Anakin and rubbing his knee. This is platonic.This is fine. This isn’t taking advantage of Anakin in this state.

Obi-Wan has absolutely no desire to take advantage of Anakin in this state, not when he’s so hurt and sad and in need of comfort. Obi-Wan just wants to provide him with comfort, but it feels like a grievous violation to touch Anakin like this willingly. It breaks one of his most cardinal rules.

But it turns out he’d break a lot of rules for Anakin, apparently.

Especially when Anakin responds so well to his touch, practically throwing himself out of his own chair and into Obi-Wan’s arms, tea forgotten on the table.

“How am I supposed to go back there?” He sobs into Obi-Wan’s shoulder. “I thought...we were supposed to raise kids in that house and she...she’s been...she’s been cheating on me in our bed--”

Obi-Wan tentatively strokes through his hair, adding pressure when Anakin reacts positively. He hates seeing him like this, so torn up and aching. He’d loved his wife, it’s so clear to see.

But Anakin has always struck Obi-Wan as the sort of person to put loyalty over everything else. For his wife to break his trust so suddenly and quickly must spell the death of his love for her. That must be what Obi-Wan is witnessing now, with Anakin, sans wedding ring, sobbing into his arms like this. This must be how Anakin’s love dies.

“I’m so sorry, Anakin,” he murmurs into the man’s temple, pressing his nose there at his hairline and inhaling as softly as he can. He’s disgusted with himself. He can’t help himself. He--

“She said she loved him,” Anakin sniffles, seemingly unaware of anything but his own pain. Obi-Wan gathers him closer at these words and rubs at his back, offering silent comfort. To have Anakin close like this is agony, but to be an appropriate distance away from him as he fell apart would also be agony of a different sort.

And if the last four years have proven anything, Obi-Wan will choose the agony that causes Anakin any modicum of happiness he can give him.

“She said--” here Anakin pauses and takes several deep breaths against the cotton of Obi-Wan’s now damp sleepshirt. “She said she didn’t when they started, but then I--I didn’t notice and it--she said it just happened, but--”

He breaks off and freezes in Obi-Wan’s arms quite suddenly. Obi-Wan stills his own hands in response. “But?” he asks, barely more than an exhale.

“But she said she couldn’t feel sorry about it,” Anakin whispers back, pulling away so that he can look at Obi-Wan’s face.

Obi-Wan stares at him, uncomprehending. Anakin’s wife is the unapologetic sort of woman, yes, but to be caught cheating on her husband and then refuse to apologize for the betrayal? That’s something else entirely. “What?” he stutters out in a completely unflattering way.

Anakin’s eyes glisten, but he purses his lips and flexes his jaw before he speaks again. “She said she couldn’t feel sorry about falling in love with someone else because it’s quite clear I’ve done the same thing. And--and she may have physically cheated on me first, but I’ve...I’ve been emotionally unfaithful to her for years now.”

Obi-Wan blinks quite a bit and very fast, tightening his hold on Anakin before pulling away just as quickly. “That’s absurd,” he spits out, trying to calm his rushing heartbeat. “Anakin, you’re the most loyal person I know. You would never--”

“She was right,” Anakin cuts him off, breaking eye contact with him to look over his shoulder and then down at...at his lips. “I didn’t even realize she was right until she said it, but. But I’ve been in love with someone else for three years of my five year marriage. I--I’m not who we thought I was.”

And his eyes well up with tears again and Obi-Wan isn’t strong enough this time from stopping himself from reaching out and brushing one of his tears away with the pad of his thumb.

“Anakin, you’re not…” thinking straight, serious, in your right mind, in love with anyone but your wife. “You’re hurting, Anakin,” he settles on saying. “You need to...sleep. To rest.”

You need to stop saying things that will break my heart in a few days when you realize you don’t actually mean them.

But Anakin has always been stubborn, especially when it comes to Obi-Wan’s demands. “Obi-Wan,” he insists, shoving his face forward so that their heads connect with a thump. “Obi-Wan, it’s you. It’s been you. For. For longer than I knew. For three years at least. Maybe longer. It should have been you from the beginning. When--”

“Anakin, please,” he finds himself begging, scrambling up and off the floor and away from this troublesome man. “Do not say anything you cannot take back. You are in distress, you’re not thinking clearly.”

Anakin follows him to his feet. “I need to say this,” he says, voice breaking. “Please, Obi-Wan. Let me say this.”

Obi-Wan has never known how to say no to Anakin. He closes his mouth instead.

“Before we even started dating, that’s when I sat in on your lecture. When we were seniors. I just wanted to see. Wanted to know why she liked you so much, measure up my competition. But then I liked you, more than I’ve ever liked a guy before. And it only got worse after I met you again, at that party, I don’t know if you remember, but. The days after, I drove my wife insane asking questions about you and your work and your interests and your hobbies, and I didn’t even realize I was doing it.

“You were just...you were so amazing. But I loved her so much I didn’t even notice I had any love left in my heart to give to anyone else, but then there you were. There you were and every time I saw you it was like...coming up for air. Like I was living someone else’s life and then sometimes I just got to be myself and it was only ever when you were around and--I didn’t know it was love until my wife told me tonight that she fucked another man because she couldn’t stand that I fell in love with one first, and I knew immediately who she was talking about. It was you. It’s...Obi-Wan, it’s always been you.”

Anakin closes the distance between them slowly, as if he’s giving Obi-Wan a chance to run. Obi-Wan does consider it, he won’t lie, but he stands stock still as if frozen to the ground. Anakin reaches up gently and wipes at one of his tears. Obi-Wan hadn’t even realized he started crying.

“Please don’t cry,” Anakin whispers through his tears. “I understand if you--if you don’t feel the same way, but I couldn’t be quiet about it once I realized. I don’t know how to love quietly.”

Obi-Wan does. Obi-Wan’s spent four years loving Anakin quietly, and now he doesn’t have any words left in him to love him out loud.

Anakin’s hand falls away from his face at his continued silence and he looks, if possible, more heartbroken. “I...I understand,” he murmurs. “You don’t feel the way I do. I--yes. I get it. I...deserve it.”

At this, Obi-Wan has to say something because it’s been one of the tenets of his world for years now that Anakin Skywalker deserves all the love there is in the entire universe. “No,” he says roughly, dragging the words kicking and screaming from the pit of his stomach. “It’s not that. It’s--”

Anakin looks at him with wide, wet, blue eyes.

“It’s that if you...if I say it and then...tomorrow you decide you don’t mean it...darling you have to know there would be no recovering from that, for me. I’ve been so obvious.”

Anakin blinks as the words register in his brain, and Obi-Wan can tell the exact moment they do because he inches closer and clutches tightly onto his shirt. “You’ve not been obvious at all,” he murmurs, eyes still shining, even as he directs his entire attention to his lips.

“What would I need to do?” Obi-Wan breathes, aching to wrap his arms around his waist and terrified that doing so will startle Anakin away from him. “What would I need to do for you to understand how much I...how much I’ve loved you for all these years?”

“Kiss me,” Anakin whispers, leaning down as if drawn by some magnetic pull.

Obi-Wan knows he will hate himself in the morning for giving in when Anakin is so obviously grief-stricken and looking for no-strings-attached physical comfort. And yet, he meets him halfway anyway.

#asks #prompt fill #lets be real these havent been ficlets for months let alone snippets #these are just. fics lmao #anyway i couldnt choose who to hurt/comfort with this prompt so ii actually went with both haha #very on brand #anakin's pov would of course contain the famous 'oh. OH.' of realization #obikin #obi-wan kenobi #anakin skywalker #i have so many amazing asks to respond to and im going to do it tonight #i just wanted to post this and then spend like a solid eight hours on my paintings because they have a really real and fast approaching #deadline #cw: cheating #married with a twist au

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newdougsblog · 3 years

Text

The Tragic Hero Full of Fear

Hello everyone! Before I get into this, I’d like to thank @jasontoddiefor for both the name and being the main enabler of this fun piece of writing. I also want to thank all my wonderful friends over on Discord for letting me bounce ideas off of them and helping me. You are all amazing!!

Ok, so let’s get into it!

The first six Star Wars movies (the Original and Prequel trilogies) are commonly referred to as “the Tragedy of Darth Vader.” But what makes these movies a tragedy? How is Anakin Skywalker himself, the main character of said tragedy, a tragic hero? In this meta/essay, I will discuss how Anakin himself is definitionally a tragic hero and outline his story as it relates to the structure of a classic Greek tragedy.

This essay will focus solely on Anakin’s character as he is canonically portrayed.

The Hero

Let’s go through the main traits of a tragic hero (as per early literature) and discuss them in the context of Anakin Skywalker.

Possesses immense courage and strength and is usually favored by the gods

Anakin’s courage is evident throughout his entire life, such as when he participates in the pod race in TPM or on the front lines during the Clone Wars.

While we cannot definitively ascribe Anakin’s abilities to any deity, we can associate them with the Force. The Force is able to somewhat influence the happenings of the universe in certain ways and takes the place of any sort of deity.

Whether Anakin is the “Chosen One” or not, his connection to the Force is stronger than that of any other Force-sensitive being, so he is consequently closer to it than most, if not all, other Force-sensitive beings.

Extreme loyalty to family and country

Anakin is consistent in his demonstrations of loyalty to those he has strong feelings for (whether those feelings be romantic or platonic).

His devotion to Padmé surpasses his loyalty to the Jedi, and he is always willing to go to great lengths to ensure their safety and well-being.

Anakin also exhibits a strong sense of devotion to his mother, Shmi. His devotion to her, and by extension her wellbeing, surpasses his duties as Jedi.

In ROTS, Anakin says, “I will not betray the Republic… my loyalties lie with the Chancellor and with the Senate… and with you” (you, in this case, referring to Padmé). In this quotation, Anakin’s loyalties are made quite clear. At this point, he is not faithful to the Jedi, but to his government, its leaders, and, of course, his wife.

Representative of society’s current values

During the Clone Wars, Anakin is known by the moniker, “the Hero with No Fear,” and is one of the Republic’s “poster boys.” He is charismatic, kind, seemingly fearless (obviously) and a strong fighter, thus representing the values that were important to the Republic at the time. The last characteristic is especially important because of the assurance it instills in times of war. As a representation of the Republic, Anakin’s prowess on the battlefield creates hope for its citizens that victory is possible.

Anakin also empathizes with the opinion that the seemingly outdated Jedi Code holds them back. In the Citadel Arc, Tarkin remarks that “the Jedi Code prevents [the Jedi] from going far enough to achieve victory.” Anakin actually agrees with this statement, replying that “[he’s] also found that [the Jedi] sometimes fall short of victory because of [their] methods” (Season 3, Episode 19). He shows a sense of allegiance not to the ancient ways of the Jedi, but to the newer, more modern ideals regarding military action.

Anakin claims to have brought “peace, justice, freedom, and security” to his “new Empire.” While the Empire's interpretations of the aforementioned values are skewed, Anakin continues to represent them as Darth Vader.

Anakin’s statement to Obi-Wan also mirrors Palpatine’s declaration to the Senate: “In order to ensure our security and continuing stability, the Republic will be reorganized into the first Galactic Empire, for a safe and secure society which I assure you will last for ten thousand years.” The people applaud this statement, demonstrating a general sense of exhaustion in regards to the war and a yearning for what this new Empire is promising them.

Lead astray/challenged by strong feelings

Though there are many, many examples of Anakin’s emotions getting the better of him, we’re simply going to list two:

Anakin’s fury and anguish after the death of his mom leads to his slaughter of the Tuskens

Anakin’s overwhelming fear of losing Padmé is ultimately what leads to his Fall.

Every tragic hero possesses what is called a hamartia, or a fatal flaw. This trait largely contributes to the hero’s catastrophic downfall. Anakin’s hamartia is his need for control, which partially manifests through his fear of loss.

Let’s explore this idea in more detail.

Though Anakin grows up as a slave, the movies neglect to explicitly cover the trauma left from his time in slavery. However, it is worth noting that slaves did not have the ability to make many choices for themselves; they didn’t even own their bodies. After being freed, Anakin is whisked away to become a Jedi. He does not possess much control over his life as Jedi, for he is simply told what path he is going to take. While Anakin does make this decision on his own, becoming a Jedi is a disciplined and somewhat-strict way of life and not one that allows for an abundance of reckless autonomy as he is wont to engage in.

(Side note: I’m not here to argue about Qui-Gon’s decision-making abilities, nor do I wish to engage in discourse regarding the Jedi’s way of life. I am simply presenting and objectively stating these facts in relation to Anakin because they are pertinent to my point.)

During AOTC, Anakin is unable to save his mother from death. As Shmi dies in his arms, Anakin is absolutely helpless. The situation is completely out of his control, and he is forced to contend with the reality that despite all of his power, he cannot control everything that happens.

He also feels that he has a larger potential for power and is being held back by Obi-Wan: “although I'm a Padawan learner, in some ways... a lot of ways... I'm ahead of him. I'm ready for the trials. I know I am! He knows it too. He believes I'm too unpredictable… I know I started my training late... but he won't let me move on.” Anakin believes Obi-Wan, his teacher and mentor, is holding him back. He expresses a self-held conviction of his status and skills and does not trust the word of his superior.

In ROTS, Anakin starts dreaming of Padmé’s death. Considering what occurred the last time he dreamt of a loved one’s demise, Anakin is justifiably (or at least justifiably from his point of view) worried. He consequently wants to stop these dreams from coming true in any way possible. His fear of death, especially that of his loved ones, represents his need for control over everything, even things that are uncontrollable. This overwhelming desire leads to Anakin’s drastic actions.

As Darth Vader, he no longer possesses such fears, for everyone that he loved is either dead or has betrayed him. He is the epitome of order and control, eliminating any who disturb this perceived equilibrium.

However, this changes because of one person: Luke Skywalker.

Luke reintroduces something that was (arguably) long-absent in Vader’s life, which is interpersonal attachment. Vader yearns for his son to join him by his side. When Luke refuses, Vader continues to attempt to seek him out. In ROTJ, Vader is forced to choose between the Emperor, a man he has long trusted and followed, and Luke, the son he never knew he had. Out of a desire to protect and keep what little family he has left (and likely a sense of “I couldn’t save Padmé but at least I can save her legacy by keeping her child(ren) alive and safe”), Vader defeats the Emperor and saves his son. Though his actions are definitionally heroic, Anakin never truly overcomes his hamartia.

The Structure of a Tragedy

Classic Greek tragedies follow a specific story structure, which, according to the German playwright Gustav Freytag, is as follows:

We’re going to focus on the three aspects that best represent Anakin’s story as a tragedy: The peripeteia, the anagnorisis, and the catastrophe/denouement. These occur during and/or after the climax.

The peripeteia is the climax/the turning point in the plot. Said change usually involves the protagonist's good luck and prosperity taking a turn for the worse.

Within the tragedy we are discussing, the peripeteia occurs when Anakin chooses Sidious over Mace Windu and solidifies his allegiance to the Dark side, becoming the very thing he swore to destroy. It is at this point that things really start to go downhill. He kills children, chokes his wife, fights his best friend, gets his remaining limbs cut off, etc.

The anagnorisis is the point in the tragedy when the protagonist recognizes their error, seeing the true nature of that which they were previously ignorant of, usually regarding their circumstances or a specific relationship (such as Oedipus’ realization that his wife was actually his mother). In most tragedies, the anagnorisis is in close proximity to the peripeteia. In Anakin’s story, the anagnorisis occurs during ROTJ. After being wounded in his fight against Luke, Vader watches as his son is brutally electrocuted by Sidious. It is at this moment that Darth Vader realizes that Luke was right—there is good in him, and he still has the chance to redeem himself.

The catastrophe/denouement (since this is a tragedy, we’re going to go with “catastrophe”) is the end of the tragedy. Events and conflicts are resolved and brought to a close, and a new sort of “normality” is established. The catastrophe often provides a sense of catharsis (release of tension) for the viewer. The protagonist is worse off than they were at the beginning of the tragedy.

The catastrophe within “The Tragedy of Darth Vader” transpires soon after the anagnorisis at the end of ROTJ. Though the realization of his capacity for good is the anagnorisis, the follow-through (via his actions), as well as what consequently occurs, is the catastrophe. As previously discussed, Vader saves Luke by killing the Emperor but does so at the cost of his own life. This serves as the resolution of the tragedy, for the hero’s fate has been confirmed—Darth Vader fulfills his destined role as the Chosen One and, in doing so, brings about his own redemption and dies as Anakin Skywalker.

In conclusion, the categorization of Star Wars as a tragedy is a choice that heavily influences Anakin, the protagonist and hero, of the story. He is without a doubt a tragic hero whose fatal flaw leads to his downfall. In accordance with Aristotle’s theory of tragedy, Anakin’s tragedy is constructed not by personal agency, but by the narrative itself.

Works Cited

“Darth Vader.” Wikipedia, Wikimedia Foundation, 15 Mar. 2021, en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Darth_Vader.

“Dramatic Structure.” Wikipedia, Wikimedia Foundation, 20 Feb. 2021, en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dramatic_structure.

“Hero.” Encyclopaedia Britannica, Encyclopaedia Britannica, Inc., 19 Oct. 2016, www.britannica.com/art/hero-literary-and-cultural-figure.

Lucas, George, director. Star Wars: Episode III— Revenge of the Sith. Lucasfilm Ltd., 2005.

Lucas, George, director. Star Wars: Episode II— Attack of the Clones. Lucasfilm Ltd. , 2002.

Michnovetz, Matt. “Star Wars: The Clone Wars, ‘Counterattack.’” Season 3, episode 19, 4 Mar. 2011.

“Sophocles: the Purest Artist.” Encyclopædia Britannica, Encyclopædia Britannica, Inc., www.britannica.com/art/tragedy-literature/Sophocles-the-purest-artist.

“Theory of Tragedy.” Encyclopædia Britannica, Encyclopædia Britannica, Inc., www.britannica.com/art/tragedy-literature/Theory-of-tragedy.

“Tragic Hero.” Dictionary.com, Dictionary.com, www.dictionary.com/browse/tragic-hero.

#star wars #Anakin Skywalker #greek tragedy #anakin the tragic hero #meta #so many meta ideas not enough time #wow thanks tumblr formatting for being terrible

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chokemeanakin · 3 years

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Heyyy first wanna say that I love you!! 💜❤️🤎🧡💙🤍💚🖤

Next, I’ve been really sick lately, like haven’t been bail to take down food for a solid week, and in and out of hospital for the last two weeks, so could you please write up an Anakin small fic or head canon or just anything with a really sick reader, but she finds it hard to exsept help? Your fives have been keep me alive I swear haha

Okay LOVE YOU💖💖

YOOO IVE BEEN WANTING TO DO THIS FOR WEEEEEEKKKSSS you literally read my mind !!! 😆😆😆 (also I’m so sorry that you’re terribly sick, I’m sending you all my love and I hope you get better soon. I love you too boo thang ❤️) HERE WE GO:

(Also fun fact whump is my area of expertise so if this gets to be really long I apologize — it’s just hard for me to narrow stuff down, anyway, enjoy)

Anakin x Sick (fem) Reader Headcanons:

Gif from @swprequels

The minute you get sick, you immediately shut yourself into your room and hide from the world.

You hate people seeing you at your worst, most vulnerable state. So weak, and needy, and messy and in pain. You’ve always been the type to push people away, no matter how sick you get, because you just can’t let them see you like that.

But like.... imagine you’re new to the temple or something. You haven’t been there for very long, and you still don’t really know your way around. And you wake up at night with the worst stomach pains, like writhing around in bed and crying and begging higher powers for any kind of relief sort of pain.

And you somehow manage to wrench yourself onto shaking legs and dig through the bathroom cabinet, only to find that you have no medicine that can help you.

The next logical step is you go to the medbay, but you have no idea where that even is. And so you’re left to drag yourself down the halls to the only other person who you can think of to help you, the only other other person you want to see right now.

Anakin opens the door shirtless, rubbing sleep out of his bleary eyes. You wish you could feel worse for waking him up when he was obviously sleeping, but your stomach is twisting and turning and a layer of cold sweat is forming over you and you need his help. So you swallow your pride and stand there as he asks, “Y/n? What’s wrong, baby?”

He doesn’t hesitate as he gently ushers you into his room, holding you up as he leads you to the bed. You’re glad, because you don’t think your legs can hold you up for very much longer. And he’s kneeling in front of you, taking your face in his hands and wiping away your tears as you clutch at your stomach and tremble beneath him.

“I-I don’t feel good,” is all you can manage before wincing at a particularly painful stab, shuttering as the nausea worsens.

He’s so worried, eyes scanning over every inch of you. He’s less soft now, and more action as protecting you and figuring out what’s wrong is his first priority.

“What hurts?”

Everything hurts, but you settle with the most pressing offender. “My stomach.”

His eyes drop to your arms, which are wound around your middle like you could squeeze the pain away. You’re hunched over, shivering violetently, skin pale in the darkness. Very obviously sick, although now he has to decide whether it’s bad enough where it warrants a visit to the medbay. His heart twists painfully.

“When did it start?”

“A couple hours ago.”

“Did you eat something?”

He’s rubbing his thumb along your cheek, capturing each cold tear as they’re occasionally squeezed out of your eye.

“Not that I know of,” you whisper. “I had the same as everyone else.”

“Okay,” he says after a moment, then stands. He keeps one hand gently cradling your face as he reaches behind you and pulls the blankets back. “You wanna lie down?”

You want to say yes, but suddenly you’re hit with a particularly excruciating twist of the stomach, and you know it wouldn’t be a good idea. If you move even slightly, you’re pretty certain you’ll be spilling your dinner all over the floor. The thought has you moaning slightly, curled even further into yourself, shaking your head. “Can’t.”

“Alright. That’s okay. Do you think you’re gonna be sick?”

A terrible wave of embarrassment washes over you, but you force yourself to nod.

Anakin doesn’t even have to ask to know that you won’t be able to make it the bathroom. He wouldn’t want to subject that to you anyway, knelt on the cold tile floor before the toilet. No, he wants you to be as comfortable as possible.

So he takes his garbage can and makes sure it’s clean before setting it on the floor or in front of you, in case you need it quickly. You’re hanging your head, sweating and shivering and whimpering every so often as the pain builds and builds and washes over you in waves.

“It’s okay,” Anakin sits beside you, hand rubbing your back in grounding circles. “Focus on your breathing. It’ll pass soon.”

You stay there with him like that for a long while. At one point, you’re begging him for some pain meds, or anything that can take the pain away, but he has to refuse because you’re just going to throw them up anyway. He feels awful saying no, because you begin to cry again and lean forward.

He senses it right before it happens. With lightning reflexes, he snatches the bin off the ground and holds it under you just as you begin to get violently sick.

It’s not pretty, and that thought is knocking at the back of your mind as you clutch onto the rim of the bin, emptying your stomach over and over and over, barely able to catch a breath before you’re hit with another round.

Anakin sits right next to you through it all, dragging his fingers along the nape of your neck to gather your hair over one shoulder, rubbing soothing line and circles into your back, hushing you and telling you to let it out, that you’ll feel better once it’s over.

He’s right about that. Throwing up scares you, and you hate it with everything in you, but for the time being you feel a little better. Once your food stops forcing its way back up and you can finally breathe, there’s a moment where the awful stabbing pain in your stomach is quiet and you can open your eyes and lift your head.

“You think you’re done?”

You take a moment to assess your nausea, not wanting to be hit with a surprise attack and make a mess all over the floor. But for the time being, your stomach has settled and now you’re left as a trembling, weak, shell of a human, barely able to sit upright on your own.

You nod and wipe your mouth, disgusted with the contents now on the back of your hand. Your pajamas have been soaked in sweat, and you’re sure you look absolutely disgusting. You’re too weak to care a whole lot, but the shame still bubbles up in your chest.

Somehow he’s got a glass of water, and he’s handing it to you so you can swish and spit. “Small sips, angel.”

Anakin sets the bin down, running his hand over your hair once more before standing. The loss of his warm presence has you shivering violently, teeth clacking together. “You want a bath? Or do you just want to go to bed?”

You don’t think you’d be able to sleep with your clothes stocking to you like this, so you choose the bath. He kisses your forehead once, saying, “I’ll go run it now. Stay here in case you get sick again.”

You nod and he leaves, the sounds of the faucet turning and water splashing into the bath sounding from the bathroom. He comes back to help you up, hands fitting right onto your disgusting sweaty and vomitty body as he half carries you to the bathroom.

And then he helps you get undressed, lowers you carefully into the water, kneels by the side of the tub and holds your hand.

Your eyes are closed and your head is pounding, achey and queasy and tired. You know you have to wash up, but you can’t seem to lift your arms.

So he does it for you 🥺

Squeezing some shampoo into his palm, gently rubbing it into your hair, using his hand to shield your face as he carefully washes it out. Running his hands over your arms and the top of you chest with soap, lathering you up and then rinsing again. And then he’s squeezing water out of a cloth, running the damp material over your face to clean it of sweat and sick.

And when he’s done, he stands and promises to be right back as he takes the bin full of vomit to the communal bathrooms, dumping it out in the toilet and then washing it in the showers. It’s early hours of the morning so no one is there, but he’d do it even if people were looking at him like he was crazy. 🥺

And when he comes back, he helps you out of the bath and bundles you up in a big fluffy towel. Runs it over your skin and dries you up, and helps you stand as you request to brush your teeth.

And then he brings you back into the room and helps you dress in some of his clothes, a pair of his sleep pants that he has to tie the string extra tight so they’ll stay up, and roll the cuffs up to your ankle about 10 times until you can walk without tripping. And he’s also got some sleep shirts that he’s never worn, and you swim in that also so he rolls up the sleeves until you can see your hands.

And now all you want to do is fall back into his pillows and go to sleep, but he asks you to hold on a while longer so that he can get you some meds. And he has you take some pills, encourages you to drink some more water, (“slow, baby”), and then he helps you lie back and get comfortable.

And if you wake up later in the night to get sick again, he’s waking up right along with you, holding you and hushing you and being the sweetest person you could ever ask for.

In instances like this, you can’t help but need and accept his help. And he doesn’t mind giving it, in fact he wants you to come to him. Anything that brings you pain, he’ll destroy.

And he’ll make sure you eat as much as you can, and that you’re drinking water. Constantly asking you how you feel, if there’s anything he can do. Runs a cold cloth over your face to soothe the fever, and massages your aching muscles until you’re all better.

The voice he uses when you’re sick 🥺. He knows that any noise can hurt your head, so he lowers his voice and it’s so smooth and deep and rumbly. So soft and gentle 😭 the sweetest voice bc his baby is in pain and he just wants to take it all away 🥺🥺

In other cases where you’re sick, like you have a cold, you’re more stubborn. You shut yourself away as soon as you get the first symptoms, denying any hint that you might be getting sick, until suddenly he realizes he hasn’t seen you in days and stops by to find you buried under covers, surrounded by tissues, all lights off in your apartment, sleeping fitfully.

And so he’ll sigh a little, clean up your apartment and then sit and watch over you. When you wake up, you’ll groan and burrow deeper into the covers and demand he leave. But he’ll just tell you to be quiet and drink this water.

Demands you tell him the moment you feel sick next time, even though he knows you never will. And then when he gets you some medicine and food, your cheeks are red with embarrassment and fever as you bashfully accept them.

But ofc you’ll get over it soon because Anakin’s here now and you might as well be miserable in his arms. So you push the covers off your overheating body and reach across the bed for him, practically falling into his lap from where he’s sitting on a chair by your bedside.

And he just simply catches you and strokes your hair and hushes you as you bury your wet eyes and flushed cheeks into his chest, sniffling pathetically.

“You’re okay, sweetheart,” he’ll promise, and hold you in his warm arms and rock you until you fall asleep.

Getting sick on Republic Cruisers is the worst. When that happens, you’re either on your way to or back from war. And so usually people are busy and running around, or exhausted and beat up. The ship is cold and everyone has their own problems to worry about, but you feel like ass and you just want to be alone with Anakin.

He feels awful when he sees you, and will order everyone out of the pilot’s room. And then he’ll clear the passenger seat off, urge you to sit down, wrap you up in as many blankets as he can find, and when he can only find a couple, he’ll sacrifice his Jedi robe. And you’ll nuzzle deep down into the cacoon of blankets and inhale the scent of Anakin’s robe, fall in and out of consciousness as you’re lulled to sleep by the soft sounds of the ship.

Anakin wishes there was more he could do for you in these instances, but the food isn’t good and there’s not usually any medicine. So he’ll keep a hand on your knee, or let you hold his hand in your lap as you sleep, and he’ll send a little surge of peace and soothing energy through the force and into you.

Will 100% find an excuse to carry you off the ship when you land, and then spend the rest of the day lying with you and tending to you and trying to make you feel better 🥺

He’s so caring and so protective and sweet. His gentle side really comes out, because his #1 thing is that he needs the people he loves to be safe, so if an illness is hurting you he will do anything he can to take the pain away.

Yes, he can’t take care of himself sometimes. But the minute you’re feeling a little under the weather, suddenly he has a PHD in medical science and he’s nursing you back to health like an expert 🥺

Also he’ll never deny you kisses when you’re sick, even if you warn him he might catch it, he just hushes you and kisses you softly on the lips. Then on the chin, then the nose, then the forehead.

Will always brush off your inability to accept help. If you say “no” or “leave me alone” or “I’m fine go away” he’ll just roll his eyes and plant himself there. Bc no matter how stubborn you can be, he’s even more.

And when you keep apologizing, obviously feeling awful for having him take care of you, he’ll just hush your worries and hold a tissue to your nose and go “blow.”

And then he’ll stay with you and watch over you until you’re all better. And even when you get back into the swing of things, he’ll watch over you like a hawk while you’re recovering 🥺🥺

You might get shy and ashamed and embarrassed when he tries to help you, but he doesn’t mind. You’ll just have to come to accept the fact that he’s always going to be there for you, to help you and hold you and make you all better ❤️

Sweet boy is so good to you 🥺🥺🥰

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rise-above-the-grave · 4 years

Note

[smashes down door] who is Bail and why do you like him? I could look it up but I'd rather you gush over him

OH BOY.

So first off, a quick (canon) history lesson: Bail Organa was the Senator and Viceroy (aka Prince Consort) of Alderaan. If you don't know what that means (because old titles are Weird - I'm not judging the only reason I know this is because of this very character), it means that Breha, Bail's wife, is ruling Queen of Alderaan and was the heir to the throne. She married Bail, making him a ruler by marriage, though technically she still held the crown. He, at some point, was also elected Senator of Alderaan, and was Senator leading up to and during The Clone Wars (and after, but we're getting to that).

So Bail, we come to find out, became (best) friends with Padmé Amidala. We see him in a couple of scenes in Attack of the Clones with Padmé, just kinda vibing and making the occasional commentary. We know he stood with her on the Opposition bill (the bill Padmé was nearly killed over at the beginning of AOTC, which was against the formation of a Republic military), though we don't learn much about the rest of his politics until later.

So he's kinda...there, but obvs isn't the focus of the story, and is really just a minor background character. The first real insight we get into Bail is, actually, a really tiny character moment right at the end of AOTC, when Palpatine and some of the Senators are looking down at the Clone troops loading up onto the ship, watching their new military gear up for war.

Bail looks away. While everyone else is staring down at the (slave) army, some of them smiling (like Sheev), some of them just serious, Bail looks away from them and makes this tiny little hand gesture: a simple, closed fist knocking against the banister of the balcony.

It's this, I think, that first piqued my interest in this character. He was the only one not triumphant in that situation. He was the only one who saw things for what they were: a tragedy, and a horror, and that this wasn't something to celebrate but to mourn.

Then we come to Revenge of the Sith, and boy howdy. The man may have like 10 minutes of screen time, but does he make those 10 minutes count!

A quick bullet point of the Important Things Bail Does in ROTS:

When the Jedi Temple is burning, what does Bail do? He flies to it to figure out what's going on and see if he can save anyone. He then watches as a youngling is shot and killed by Clone Troopers, and manages to escape because he's a fucking badass.

Please note, to our knowledge, Bail is the only one who actually goes to check on the Jedi Temple.

As soon as he escapes the Temple, Bail immediately - like immediately - takes his ship and goes to find any surviving Jedi. He is almost certainly the reason both Yoda and Obi-Wan don't walk into the trap that is the Jedi Temple, or are captured - and even if that's not true, he most definitely is the reason they manage to sneak safely onto Coruscant and figure out what happened.

He's the one who rescues Yoda (again) after Yoda's failed duel with Palpatine in the Senate. Which, let me rant about the SYMBOLISM of that for a second please. Because holy shit, the entire duel between Yoda and Palpatine takes place in the Senate, with the Senate building and pods. Here Palpatine proves to Yoda that yes, he is the Senate, he controls it, the new Empire is under his control and no one can stop him. But then - but then - Yoda escapes, and who saves him? Bail. Bail sneaks in with a speeder, saves Yoda, and gets him back to safety. Which is such a huge fucking metaphor for the fact that Bail will be the one who, ultimately, is responsible for Palpatine's defeat. But, more on that later.

Bail is there when Padmé (remember, his best friend) gives birth to Luke and Leia. Bail is literally one of 3 sentients in the galaxy who canonically knows about both Luke and Leia.

Bail instantly offers to adopt one of the children, saying "She will be loved with us." (And then she absolutely is.)

And he does all of that in line 10 minutes of screen time.

He shows up again briefly in Star Wars Rebels, and again in Rogue One, but I'm going to take a trip down a side alley here into a territory that is grossly unused in the SW EU: the founding of the Rebellion.

So we don't actually know much about how the Rebellion got started. What we do know is that Bail was one of the (if not the main) Founders. Bail was the mastermind behind the Rebellion, by all accounts knowing...everything about it: who was who, who did what, where they were located, etc. He knows (and controls) Fulcrum in Rebels, as just one example, and Fulcrum is considered by that text to be one of the most powerful Rebel operatives at the time. In Rogue One (regardless of whether you liked what they did with the Rebellion which, side note, I did not), we see he certainly has a position of great authority and power. People respect him, and listen to him, and he's on an even footing with Mon Mothma (or Mom Mothma as my autocorrect tried to say) who is canonically one of the most powerful people in the Rebellion, according to ROTJ.

More than what he did, though, we can look to his character as a reason I love him. He is a good, kind, honorable man who does (or at least tries) his best. We see again and again, throughout all of SW media he's in, that he consistently chooses the right path, regardless of whether or not it's the easy one. He fights corruption, fights for justice, fights for freedom, fights against tyranny.

He is also, canonically, an amazing father and (according to EU content, since Breha literally doesn't have a spoken line in any media content) an incredible husband. We know he's well-loved by his people, and by the Rebellion, by the extraneous texts and mentions about him in the wake of his death on Alderaan. He's also respected by many Senators during his time in the Clone Wars (Padmé makes a comment in a TCW episode about how he's the best and most respected speaker and Senator she knows), and regardless of how people felt about him after the Rise of the Empire (which is, unfortunately - or fortunately maybe, because I don't trust Disney to do it right - up to headcanon), the fact remains that Bail played an incredibly tricky position as an Imperial Senator, having to balance fighting for his people, the people of the galaxy, and setting up the Rebellion, with not making himself too much of a nuisance, or too much of a traitor, that Palpatine straight up had him executed.

Which, speaking of that, can we also take a moment to appreciate the fact that Bail knew almost every single secret that Palpatine and Vader wanted??? He knew where Obi-Wan was, and possibly where Yoda was. He knew where both of Anakin and Padmé's children were. He knew everything about the fledgling Rebellion. Like...that man, had he been captured and interrogated (and had he broken) would have damned the entire galaxy. Yet he never was. He played his cards perfectly, and was either never suspected, or was able to somehow hide all of the information they wanted to know from being found. Personally, I suspect a mixture of the two.

Furthermore, Bail Organa is a great father and husband. He is directly responsible for Leia being the amazing woman we know and love. The one shot we get of Breha, you can practically see and feel the love and adoration Bail has for her radiating off of him through the screen. Literally the most unproblematic ship in Star Wars. I have never seen a single person say they aren't amazing (unless they just want to break them up to make Bail gay? Which, come on, bisexual and polyamorous people exist, y'all. But that's a talk for another time).

If you're still not convinced, the only thing left that I can say is: I'm a raging lesbian and like, while I definitely wouldn't fuck him, Bail/Jimmy Smits (his actor) is handsome. Have some pictures that I have saved on my phone for when I'm feeling sad.

Tl;dr: Bail Organa is singlehandedly responsible for putting into motion the events that secure the galaxy's freedom, not only by being one of the founding fathers of the Rebellion, but also by reaching Yoda and Obi-Wan before the new Empire can, and getting them safely to Coruscant. He is a good, kind, and noble man who does his best in shitty times, and even if he has to make hard choices, he always makes them for the right reasons. He is a loving father, husband, and ruler, who does right by his people and his family. He fights for what's right, even when that fight is nearly impossible. He's a badass, and arguably a literal genius (you'd have to be, to do the kinds of things he does in canon).

Anyway, Bail Organa is great and I love him - and you should too.

#bail organa #breha organa #leia organa #obi wan kenobi #yoda #padme amidala #sheev palpatine #anyway i love him lots #also for any lotr peeps who read this (or at least are reading the tags)#he's basically elrond in space

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catofadifferentcolor · 2 years

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Revenge of the Sith (2005)

So this is how liberty dies... with thunderous applause.

I cannot remember when I first watched the original trilogy - sometime in third or fourth grade, I think, but possibly earlier. I grew up watching Star Trek, and, though I enjoyed Star Wars, I never quite had the same love for it. And then the prequels were announced.

Revenge of the Sith is the first SW movie I have clear memories of seeing for the first time. I was in HS and in the middle of one of the most intense exam weeks of my educational career when it was released... and so I didn't see the movie until some weeks later, after the school year had ended. I didn't anticipate much - TPM disappointed me and, while AotC was a solid move in the right direction, it wasn't enough to have me lining up at midnight for the sequel.

RotS was - and is - the movie that makes the prequels worth it. All of the problems of TPM and growing pains of AotC are bearable because of this movie. It's not perfect by any means (Padme's role largely being reduced to an incubator being one of many things a wilier script writer would have handled better) but close enough that I can't help but love and adore it.

Rewatching it's movie, it's clear that's it's not perfect - every second Padme is on scene is a second wondering where all her brain cells have disappeared to (who honestly agrees to run away with anyone after learning that he's helped to betray the Republic you swore to serve and lead a massacre of his entire order, from the eldest to the babes in arms?) and Dooku's quick death feels disingenuous to a fascinating character - but it's by far the best Star Wars movie of this century. It stands right up there with Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi and, arguably, surpasses of A New Hope with ease.

The pacing is spot on. The dialogue is only occasionally trite and/or clunky. Everything works in a way that the sequel trilogy proves is hard to manage even with all the power of Disney behind you. The battle with General Grievous is everything I wanted from the battle with Jango Fett in AotC. The Revenge of the Fates is the lightsaber battle, and a worthy heir to the Dual of the Fates. Anakin feels less of a whiny teenager than a soldier with valid points - even if he's so mixed up in the head that he manages to betray every one of them by the end. And Obi-Wan continues to be practically perfect in every way.

...I could probably go on about how the older I get, the less I seem to respect Padme as a character. RotS highlights that these types of movies never know what to do with female characters, beginning with the fact she's the only female with a speaking role in this movie and ending with the fact that on her deathbed this supposedly strong, capable, stubborn, passionate politician chooses to ask if her treasonous, child-murdering husband is okay rather then what will happen to her children. (Or maybe she felt, being Obi-Wan, she didn't have to ask if they'd be taken care of. Maybe it was understood. IDK.)

...I could also argue about expecting someone to bring balance to the force and then largely treating someone as if they're incapable of basic tasks is probably not the way to go about doing things. The Council means well, but Anakin's slave upbringing for nine years outside of the Temple always meant he'd have different feelings and reactions to things than anyone else in the Temple. Understandably he has problems with attachment, but no one ever gave him an healthy way to deal with that - and though Obi-Wan obviously tried, his clear attachment to Qui-Gon and grief over losing him likely meant that the one example of healthy cooping mechanisms really wasn't all that healthy.

...Not that it's all the Jedi's fault. Anakin's habit of doing things and then expressing regret - meaningful or not - about them while the body's still cooling is hardly healthy. His inability to take responsibility for his own actions is peculiar for someone who wants so desperately to be recognized for his abilities, but understandable. Hell, the first thing he does as an adult is jump into an ill-advised marriage with Padme, who seems to make every decision in their relationship until she suddenly loses the ability to think at all with her pregnancy.

But all that said, that's why RotS is so powerful - it's a jumble of human problems and human emotions that just happens to be playing in the context of a galactic war. It's why the movie works. (It's why, when it took me three vodka gimlets to make it through TPM, even fast forwarding through the pod race, and one to make it through AotC, today's drink was largely forgotten.)

TPM gave us the setting. AotC gave us the plot. But RotS made us care, and empathize.

#star wars #aadarshinah watches #movie review #revenge of the sith #sw #rots #sw:rots

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morganas-pendragons · 3 years

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No Body, No Crime | a.s.

As soon as I heard No Body, No Crime from Evermore, I had to write this with him. This is my first test of writing for Anakin - please be gentle. If you enjoy, let me know! I intend to make most of Evermore into a growing series for different SW characters! The first of them is below!

i may have played with the lyrics for a bit

long story short, i survived - din

***

He did it.

Your eyes flicker out to the awning in which Padmé Amidala stands. The cool air of Coruscant is tinged with something out of place tonight, something that makes the hairs on your nape stand to attention, and your watchful gaze flickers out to the skyline where you can usually spot the Jedi Temple in all its majesty.

The image of the skyline is tainted by the sound of screaming and the sight of fire encompassing the spires that usually stand so proud against the Coruscanti sky.

From where she stands beside you, Padmé Amidala bursts into tears and wraps her arms around the growing swell of her stomach. Part of you wants to say you aren’t jealous, that you don’t wish that was you carrying the child of Anakin Skywalker, but the part of you which desires - Jedi don’t desire, they don’t have wants or needs, they simply ARE - buries that feeling deep down and dredges the rage back up to the surface.

It’s so hard to believe that the same man who left you in charge of his pregnant wife, who was not so defenseless as he thought her to be, to return to the Temple - the same place you were both raised, the same place that saw the way you looked at him when he wasn’t paying attention - and inevitably be the reason it is now on fire.

Or so you think.

Padmé’s a friend of mine

We meet up every Tuesday night for dinner and a glass of wine

Before the war, you were a Jedi Knight who had great influence with many of the Senators in the Senate. It had been how you’d met Padmé Amidala to begin with - at the tender age of fourteen when you had not been much older then she was - and had orchestrated the protection she’d received from Obi-Wan Kenobi and Anakin Skywalker.

Known for your sharp tongue and even more clever mind. Maybe that’s why Anakin took an interest in you.

Padmé’s been losing sleep

Her husband’s acting different

And it smells like infidelity

Anakin Skywalker had not been much younger then you when you met. Still a Padawan himself, he only had the eyes for Amidala and often reminded his Master of that. You’d spent many a nights with Obi-Wan Kenobi on the terraces of the Temple in deep conversation about his struggles training such a head-strong Padawan.

Then the war had come, and so had Anakin’s padawan. Starry eyed Ahsoka Tano who was barely thirteen years old and having a difficult time believing she was the apprentice to the Chosen One.

You’d never called him that. It made him too prideful, too arrogant. It was unfortunate that he was so often the topic of your dreams when it was clearly obvious he was tightly wound around Padmé Amidala.

To you, he was the same boy you’d met all those years ago before a woman and the war had changed him beyond repair.

Still, you never spoke of it. Never spoke of the way you’d watch him train his padawan in the salles, never about the way he commanded an entire army with just his fierce devotion and loyalty to the clones, never about the way you felt when he made you laugh, never about how he made such a reputation for himself that the galaxy began calling him The Hero With No Fear.

And here you were, having been one of the people who made him, just another Jedi General fighting on the front lines of a war that seemed to be going on forever.

“Master? Can I ask you something?” It had been Ahsoka to bring it up one day late on the fronts of Felucia, a mission that you’d been assigned to accompany Anakin and the 501st to with your own battalion of clones. You were among the best Jedi General with the lowest casualty rates besides Anakin and Obi-Wan and he’d advocated specifically for you to join him and the rest of the 501st.

The real reason why you’d said yes was because he said he missed you.

“Absolutely, Ahsoka.”

“You know... The Jedi has taught me my entire life that we’re not supposed to have attachments. We’re not supposed to love. I’m not sure how to do that.” Ahsoka wrung her hands in her lap and lifted her eyes to where Anakin sat on the opposite side of the fire with Fives and Hardcase, mouth stuffed with ration bars and fingers pointed at you. He was probably telling some confounded story about the three missions the two of you had taken together. One of them had ended up with you nearly stuck with a Gundark and her mate, but that’s a story for another time. “How long have you?”

You still marvel at the fact that she was that intuitive.

“Have I what?”

‘’Been attached to Master Skywalker?”

That question had struck you so hard that you hadn’t quite been able to answer her the way she’d wanted. When had you accepted the fact that you were just a leech on Anakin Skywalker’s back - someone who he’d never see because his gaze was always on Padmé - desperate for his affection that he was never going to return? What the point of running after someone who’d never chase you just as recklessly?

“I guess I always run to the people who aren’t willing to run back to me.”

From that point onward, you’d vowed to bury your feelings for Anakin Skywalker as deep as they could possibly go. There was no point in entertaining a fantasy. That’s all it was. A fantasy.

This moment, however, is anything but.

When Anakin comes back to the apartment at 500 Republica, Padmé rushes out to meet him. You’re perched in the sitting room that is swathed with shadow as you keenly watch their short lived reunion. The Force is ringing with alarm. Like it’s trying to tell you something.

“Are you alright?” Padmé asks, concern laced in her tone as she grasps his arms like her life depends on it, gaze sweeping across his face as she scans him for any injury he may have obtained. “I heard there was an attack on the Jedi Temple, you can see the smoke from here!”

I think he did it

But I just can’t prove it

I think he did it but I just can’t prove it

You’ve never had a hard time being able to read Anakin. He was always so bright and receptive to both the Force and other Force sensitive people, always tuned into the feelings of people he cared about most - and victim to the destruction of his own heart that so often got him into trouble - and now as he stands mere feet in front of you, you find it akin to staring at a wall.

It’s blank. All of him is blank. All those micro-details that had fabricated the very existence known as Anakin Skywalker is as bare as the skies above Coruscant, now filled with smoke and screams.

No, no body no crime

But I aint letting up until the day I die

“What’s happening?”

“The Jedi have tried to overthrow The Republic.” Your breath catches in your throat at what is so very obviously a lie, and your heart immediately reaches out for the presence of dear Obi-Wan Kenobi who happened to be off-world in the midst of the destruction.

The Force had spared him. You.. however... you remain unaware on whether or not it’ll spare you from what inevitably comes next.

I think he did it

People who aren’t quite sure of who they’re supposed to be are so very easily manipulated.

“I can’t believe that-” Padmé argues, ever the intelligent, and shook her head at her husband’s accusation.

“I saw Master Windu try to assassinate the Chancellor myself,” Anakin replies. Blue eyes swept into the sitting room undoubtedly in search of your form to ensure someone he trusted was still looking out for his beloved. “Are they still here?”

Padmé nods. Your devotion and loyalty to both the safety of her and her child reminded her so fondly of Sabé - her Queen’s Shadow from her time sitting on the throne on Naboo - and she desperately hoped that would not end with either of you in a grave.

“You trusted the right person with our secret, Anakin.” Padmé murmured. It was rather unfortunate that he happened to choose the same person who was trying to fight the way they felt about him. Padmé ached for you. She’d been in that very same position once. “But what are you going to do?”

“I will not betray The Republic. My loyalties lie with The Chancellor, with the Senate, and with you.” The lack of your name should alarm you. It doesn’t. Given what’s currently occurring at the Jedi Temple, which is where you should be, you are not surprised that he’s forgotten your presence. Forgotten you.

Anakin’s eyes fall on the sitting room. Just as he tells Padmé of the next phase of his plan, the darkness he is growing so accustomed to feeling is lit with the sight of a glaring emerald lightsaber.

“What about them?”

You emerge from the room to stand upon the landing platform. Padmé’s lips are poised to call out your name, to beg you not to hurt him, but the very fact remains: This thing standing in front of you is not The Hero With No Fear. He’s something else entirely. Something dark, something fake.

And darkness goes against everything you have ever stood for.

“I don’t know who you think you are.” Your voice is laced with anger as you move forward, not a drop of fear in your aspect, all while keeping your blade trained at Anakin’s chest. Your mind is screaming at you - this is anakin, he’s been broken, stop stop stop stop stop you LOVE him! - but you’re too concerned about the darkness that curls around his bones and makes its home within him to listen to your heart. “But if the Jedi who are currently screaming right now are dead at your hands, I will come back and find you. I will be your end.”

You press your hand against Padmé’s. Her eyes widen at the feel of a blaster against her palm, nearly the same as the one Saché had hidden within the throne during her first year as Queen. She hears your voice clear in your mind, be careful.

Anakin has one last thing to say to you before you depart. “If you return to the Temple to save the Jedi,” He calls out, voice monotone and lacking any of the depth and warmth he so often reserved for you and Padmé and Ahsoka. “You will be marked a traitor, and I will find you.”

Your fingers curl so tightly around your lightsaber that your knuckles turn white. Your stomach threatens to drop as reality finally catches up with you: This thing currently inhabiting the body of Anakin Skywalker is far from the same boy you’d harbored feelings for. Far from the man you’d wished he could’ve become.

“I’d like to see you try.”

The last time Padmé Amidala-Skywalker sees you is the night of Operation Knightfall. She’s more then aware of the way you look at her husband, but your love for Anakin is not her concern. It’s how he could never love you back.

The last time Anakin Skywalker sees you is before he loses himself to the Dark, gives into his thirst for power, and becomes Darth Vader.

I think he did it.

***

Padmé wasn’t there

Tuesday night at her apartment

At her job

Or anywhere

Somehow, someway, Sabé contacts you. She seems to be aware of your relationship with Padmé prior to the fall of The Republic and so presses you on the details she has been deprived of - seeing as how she’s been with Tanaka for months by that point - and how she had just... died. With no warning, no logical reason, the woman she had dedicated her life to serving was dead.

Your memory still haunts you with the sights that you’d been greeted with upon landing on Mustafar. Her half-dead body carelessly tossed on the landing platform, head lolling on her shoulder, eyes fluttering as she fought consciousness.

It had been you who had given her solace aboard her starship, and it had been you to hold her daughter.

“You were the closest to my Lady and Skywalker!” Sabé snaps over the holo, and you wince at the bite in her voice. It’s been weeks of sleepless nights and living nightmares. You’re not sure you aren’t hallucinating this entire conversation anyway. “You are truly telling me you are unaware of how she died?”

She thinks I did but I just can’t prove it

You have theories. Theories with no evidence to make them facts.

No... no body no crime

“I don’t know how she died, but she did.” Your hardened gaze lands on the former handmaiden. “And now it’s up to you to protect her legacy, Sabé.”

“Amidalans.” Sabé nods gravely at the moniker and hangs her head. “That is what we will call those who guard our Lady’s tomb. Amidalans.”

“She told me about you all the time. We are brave, your Highness.” You feign a warm smile as she meets your eyes. “There’s never been a better time to be brave for your Lady then now, Sabé.”

That is the last the former Handmaiden of Amidala hears from you. She will go on to form the Amidalans, the guardians of Padmé Amidala’s tomb upon Naboo, and will even live to survive Darth Vader.

***

The Force had spared you. Until today. Today you stand on the ground of a planet you never thought you’d find yourself apart of, today you stand in the ruins of a Sith Temple with two survivors of Order 66 and the youngest Force sensitive you have seen since the genocide of the Jedi.

Today, your soul knows what is coming. The inevitable.

I wasn’t letting up until the day he...

The name you had given Kanan and Ezra was not your real one, even despite what Ahsoka had claimed about knowing you. She knew you well. After the brief argument that had occurred in light of that news, you’d taken her aside to disclose that you’d briefly joined the Empire and had been an Inquisitor under their ranks after you had been found. Among the best of them.

You don’t tell her about how they broke you. About how he broke you with the way he towered over you, the way his fingers danced across your cheek and the way his lightsaber had burned itself into your arm. His kyber crystals had called out to you. Had weeped for reprieve.

Neither of you found it. In front of you, The Sith Temple is alight with emerald and white light.

No, no body no crime

I wasn’t letting up until the day he...

We are brave, Your Highness.

No, no body no crime

“I always said I would be the one to end you.” You call out. Planted in place by Ahsoka, you disengage your saber in favor of both you and his former Padawan using your words to beckon to the person who laid within the suit. “I still fully intend to keep that promise. You’re not-” Tears prick your eyes as you turn your head away from Vader. “You are not the man I would’ve ripped the galaxy apart for.”

“Anakin Skywalker was weak. I destroyed him.” Vader tilts his head. He’s clearly proud of himself for something. “And I destroyed you as well. What a shame. You were among the Empire’s best.”

I wasn’t letting up until the day he...

“Yeah, you did destroy me.” Ezra watches in awe as both you and Ahsoka engage your sabers, a blinding flurry of green and white light, and take your defensive stances against the Sith Lord. “And now we will destroy you, in honor of him. In honor of Anakin.”

You launch yourself right at the ghost of Anakin Skywalker. He is a mirage, a fake, a shell of darkness that once housed a being you could have sworn was made of pure starlight. Of love.

So much for fantasies.

died.

#Anakin Skywalker #Anakin Skywalker x Reader #Star Wars imagines #Star Wars oneshots #Darth Vader #Ahsoka Tano #Kanan Jarrus

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space-girl-and-droids-art · 3 years

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Clone Wars: Stories of Light and Dark- Book Review

“Clone Wars: Stories of Light and Dark” Is an anthology of stories narrating some of the arcs of the clone wars from the perspective of the characters. It gives more details and depth to some episodes, as well as giving us information that makes us have a different view of the events.

This is not exactly a review, but mostly my reactions to reading the book. I do recommend it, if you loved the clone wars and want another perspective on some of the arcs this will be a good read. That said, this does contain spoilers for the clone wars.

#1 “Sharing the same Face” -Jason Fry (from the episode “Ambush”)

Okay this was once one of the most light-hearted episodes of the series and now I ended up crying. I did not expect an order 66 reference here. Every time Yoda addresses Dooku is painful. Seeing how Yoda perceives the clones is really heart-warming, but knowing how it all turns out in the end is really sad and during the whole text you are really aware of that. In the show you kind of forget about what’s going to happen for a while, but this text just keeps you thinking about it constantly. It was a good read, I loved it. I found it really interesting knowing Yoda approaches the clones the same way he approached his students at the temple, and knowing what his opinions on the clone army it was a good detail. Loved this one.

Did I care that much about this episode before? No. But watching it right after reading this made me cry for half an hour. (I am a really emotional person, so take this with a grain of salt.)

#2 “Dooku Captured”- Lou Anders (From the episodes “Dooku Captured” and “Gungan General”.

This was a funny read, and the fact that the events are narrated by Dooku Himself made it even more hilarious. It’s supposedly a holorecording Dooku was doing for Sidious, and you can tell by his words that he was so done. Poor Dooku deserves a meditation day after it. You can tell how annoyed he was by the whole situation and his perception of Anakin Skywalker and Obi-Wan Kenobi. They really are bothering for the count. I’m surprised he didn’t retire after this event, man’s gotta be really tired. Also, when they were tied together, they just shared a braincell and most of the time, Dooku was the one carrying it. The love he had for Qui-Gon does not extend to rest of the lineage, clearly.

At first it was really slow, but after they get captured by the pirates it just gets funnier. Good story to read after the sadness the previous text gave me.

Also, the fact that Dooku canonically records himself venting to Sidious is hilarious to me. Like, can you imagine being Palpatine and receiving daily vlogs from your apprentice ranting and complaining about Anakin and Obi-Wan? Dude was tired, of course he would let Anakin decapitate him in the end.

#3 “Hostage Crisis”- Preeti Chhibber (from the episode “Hostage Crisis”)

For an Anidala shipper this is a must read, because you will know exactly what Anakin thinks of his wife and how he views Padmé. This text was more Anakin centric (I believe the next one is Padmé centric) and it was a delight. I haven’t read much in canon about stuff that involves Anakin’s feelings so this was really good.

The scene from the beginning of the episode? Is hotter when you read it, trust me. For a clearly SFW text, this was intense. I’m pretty sure I can guess all of Anakin’s kink only by what was implied in his thoughts. Is also really sweet to see how much she cares, but also know why everything went downhill at the end. Good retelling.

#4 “Pursuit of Peace”- Anne Ursu (from the episodes “Heroes on both sides” and “Pursuit of Peace”)

I really love Padmé Amidala. My favorite senator. If you have seen my review of Queen’s Peril you KNOW How much I love her, and even when this text was written by another author, I still got the same feeling about her. Padmé is amazing. This arc is one of my favorite of the Clone wars because it’s the arc that let you see that it wasn’t a black and white kind of situation, both sides were being played. An none of them were really worrying about their people, they were in it for the money. I love reading Padmé’s thoughts on the whole situation. Also, the way this story is written makes what went down with Padmé and Anakin in the third episode make more sense and more in character. She is a strong, good, and smart politician. But she is also motivated to see the light in the dark and preserve the light, it gave me major Qui-Gon from “Master and Apprentice” vibes. It did make me tear up a little, because when I finished it, I realized everything she did was for nothing. She was too kind in a galaxy already so corrupted.

Also, Palpatine stop calling her “my child” you disgusting sith lord, I know you are responsible for her death and so do you, so shut the f up. Padmé was doing everything right and she hasn’t done anything wrong in her life whatsoever.

“Just because there’s darkness in something does not mean you do not love it. You show it love, you show it light, and you hope it chooses the light”.

She was talking about the senate but you just KNOW she isn’t really talking about the senate.

This story re-telling broke me, just as the first one. I am not ready for the next one. Do I have to? Man, I really don’t want to go through Umbara again.

#5 “The Shadow of Umbara” -Yoon Ha Lee (from the episodes "Darkness on Umbara," "The General," "Plan of Dissent," and "Carnage of Krell”)

I was, indeed, not ready for it. It doesn’t really add much to the story… except pain. Rex’s pain, to be precise. Let my man mourn Hardcase :C I just wanted to give him a hug, him and all of the clones to be honest. Fives was as good as always, but re-reading his lines knowing what happens to him made me sad. I hate Pong Krell, get you dirty hands off my babies. I don’t think this re- telling made me sadder, but that’s only because it was just as painful as the episodes.

Dogma my beloved, you deserve everything.

I love how this arc develops Rex character and his attitude towards the war in general.

#6 “Bane’s Story”- Tom Angleberger (from the episodes “Deception”, “Friends and Enemies”, “The Box” and “Crisis on Naboo”.)

Is Cad Bane the Regina George of the Bounty Hunters?

The answer is yes. Yes, he is.

I wasn’t really excited to read about Cad Bane at first, I felt that everything that had to be said about the guy had already been stated in the show. He was just a mean bounty hunter in space. But this was actually pretty funny to read, specially because it’s narrated in first person from Bane’s perspective on what happened with Kenobi. And it’s hilarious.

He is basically re telling the events to Boba and Bossk while he is in jail again. During his story you can learn a few things about him as well, specially what his thoughts are in relation to some important topics. You would think he is only concerned about the money and blasting people, and you would be right. But he also does have an opinion on what’s happening on the galaxy at large, on the jedi, on Palpatine and Dooku. But those opinions don’t affect how he gets the job done. It was really interesting seeing him internally judging Kenobi for being a liar, and knowing something is wrong with the jedi order if they pulled that off. He knows everyone is being deceived, but doesn’t know how. That’s why he doesn’t care, and doesn’t get involved on anything unless you offer to pay him. Money moves him, but not the people who has it.

It was a good story, and I also liked to see how Bane respects Boba and sees him as the one that’s going to take his place eventually.

We know from the deleted episodes that Cad Bane was supposed to be killed by Boba Fett, but we haven’t seen that in canon yet. I really hope they answer what happened to Cad Bane in the current canon, I would love to see that in a comic, or in a book.

#7 “The lost nightsister”- Zoraida Cordova (from the episode “Bounty”)

I love Asajj Ventress for a million reasons and this story just made me love her even more. It’s the same story from the episodes but with an insight of what Ventress is thinking about. Which is unsurprisingly very depressing but the story itself turns out to be pretty uplifting.

It’s about her thoughts on what happened after the massacre of her sisters, her family, and how she deals with everything she had already lost. How lonely and worthless she feels. But during the course of the story, we see her reconnecting with who she is, and learning her value. Learning she is a powerful person, master or not.

It was also really sad to see how she compared herself to others. She was really sad and angry that nobody cared about what happened to her people, no one that cared about her. She saw how people wanted the girl in the box back and thought about how nobody would ever do the same for her and it was sad.

I also find very depressing that she couldn’t mourn her family.

But then she said this:

“What made her so special? What made her worth—No. She couldn’t think that way. This girl’s worth didn’t diminish her own. “

And like, I’m 100% rooting for her here.

Also, I love that once she realized the girl from the box was being smuggled to be essentially a child bride, she didn’t hesitate to scam the old creep. She may be an assassin, but during the course of this story you learn that she is disgusted by men who take advantage of female beings. I also love her internal monologue after the guy was bothering her in the cantina and how she just knows that if she can defend herself, she will do it with no hesitation.

Lovely story, I love knowing more about Ventress. Beautifully written.

#8"Dark Vengeance”-Rebecca Roanhorse (from the episodes "Brothers" and "Revenge")

It’s so on brand for Darth Maul to have his entire story be about Kenobi. It’s narrated by him, but directed towards you, like he is telling the reader a story. That in some stories could be like an awkward thing, but here it was well done. I love Maul and like, I could picture us having that conversation, well, me listening to him monologuing.

I really liked that he started telling the story from the events that happened on Naboo. You get to really see what happened from his perspective and understand why his hatred of Kenobi only grows over time.

Also, Darth Maul was like “I can excuse murder, but I draw the line at being rude”. Which is so morally wrong, but very fitting to his character. He is really upset at Kenobi for not caring about what happened to him. From what I gathered of the info that he let us know, he would probably like it more if Kenobi killed him instead of having to spend all those years in the garbage. Nobody cared for him enough to go and check up on what happened to him. That doesn’t excuse murder though.

The interactions he had with Kenobi let us know that it was not very jedi like the way he treated Maul, ignoring his rage and letting it consume him. Obi-wan just kept adding fuel to the fire because he was also really angry at Maul for the murder of Qui-Gon, not realizing that that would only make Maul be even angrier. And we know how that ended up for Satine Kenobi.

Final thoughts: Savage, I love you.

#9 "Almost a Jedi"-Sarah Beth Durst (from the episode "A Necessary Bond")

I thought this story was going to be from Ahsoka’s point of view. It was not.

I’m not mad at it though.

The story itself does focus on Ahsoka but it’s narrated by Katooni. It’s basically about how much she adores Ahsoka and wants to be like her, but also doubts herself a lot. She thinks she is not good enough to be a jedi. But her experiences both with Ahsoka and with Hondo Ohnaka makes her change her mind.

I want to say that I love the fact that it’s canon that she drew a poster of Ahsoka for her room because she really admired her that much it's so wholesome. It’s cute, and also let us see the perception the younglings had of Ahsoka.

Also, the bond between Hondo and Katooni is really wholesome. This also made me realize that this encounter with a young jedi is the reason he is immediately friendly with Ezra in Rebels. Ezra and Katooni do share similar personality traits sometimes.

Deep diving in Wookiepedia after reading this I found out that Hondo’s ship in Galaxy’s Edge is called “The Katooni” and now I’m sad thinking he was probably devastated when he learnt about Order 66 and what Vader did to the younglings. Great now I’m angsty about a chaotic evil space pirate.

I think it was confirmed by Dave Filoni that those kids are dead now. May the force be with them, they were good enough jedis.

#10 "Kenobi's Shadow"-Greg van Eekhout (from the episode "The Lawless”)

This is the re-telling of one of the saddest clone wars episodes. The episode just lets you think that everything’s going to be alright, that they are going to survive together, lets you hope that they take off just in time… and then it doesn’t happen. I’m still not over Satine’s death. And this made it even sadder. There were so many points their story could’ve gone differently, but their story was already at an end.

This is in third person but heavily focusing on Kenobi’s thoughts along the way. He really was close to turn to the dark side, but his love for Satine and his grief made him not surrender to it. But he felt an anger, a justified one, but an anger that I have never seen in a jedi other than Anakin Skywalker. And we all know what happens to him.

It was a good but sad reading. I won’t be reading this one again. It’s too much. I knew what was going to happen and it still hit me hard. I wish things would’ve gone differently for the both of them. I wonder if we will get flashbacks to this in the Kenobi show.

Also, I really need an Obi-Wan Kenobi and Satine book of their time on the run.

#11 "Bug"-E. Anne Convery (inspired by the episode "Massacre”)

I can’t talk openly about this story because it’s not actually featured on the clone wars. It’s a really good story, specially if you want to expand on the lore regarding Dathomir and the Nightsister in the new canon. It’s perfectly executed, and even when the story isn’t about any of the main characters it hooked me from start to finish. Definitely one of my favorite stories of the book and If I had to pick one story from this anthology to read again it would be this one.

It has more gruesome details than the others and the atmosphere is dark, and I loved it. I would read a whole Dathomirian Nightsister novel written by this author if it was in this exact same style. I really liked it a lot.

In summary, I really enjoyed reading this Anthology. I would really recommend it to anyone who is fond of the Clone Wars or the prequels era. Adults, Kids, Teens, Young adults. I think I would’ve enjoyed this book as a kid as well, and I enjoyed it a lot now in my early twenties. It contains a little bit of everything and that makes it a really complete anthology.

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tennessoui · 3 years

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omgggg yes number 45 gimme some number 45 obikin PLEASE

ok,,,,,,this is no. 1 Soulmates + no.45 in love with best friend's partner but it kinda got away from me so it's almost 2k and also like there's world-building im awful at snippets. This is obikin but also mentions of qui-gon/anakin BUT it's a fake relationship. it's not in the story, but the premise obi-wan doesn't know is that anakin needed coruscanti citizenship to get their healthcare for his mom, and qui-gon decides to help him out by marrying him to give him automatic citizenship i uh might continue this if people like it because it was fun to write whoops

“We met at the spaceport three days ago,” Anakin says with a demure little smile, curling further into Qui-Gon’s outstretched arm. The soft lamplight glints off the golden band Anakin’s wearing on his finger. Obi-Wan has had a hard time looking anywhere else since arriving in his old master’s quarters, has had a hard time thinking of anything else except that he’d always imagined Anakin wearing a more bronzed shade of gold.

It had been a shock to hear that while Obi-Wan had been out on a mission, Qui-Gon had returned to Coruscant with a husband in tow. Yes, alright, short courtships aren’t rare anywhere in the galaxy, especially between soulmates.

But Obi-Wan knows intimately well--better than anyone else in this room--that Anakin and Qui-Gon aren’t, in fact, soulmates.

Mace seems to be thinking the same thing because he states, with a slight question in his voice, “I was under the impression that your soulmate had passed into the Force, Qui-Gon.”

“We’re not soulmates,” Qui-Gon corrects placidly, arm moving away from Anakin’s shoulders--Obi-Wan can breathe again--so he can fiddle with the cuff around his wrist, which hides the faded name of his mate. “But now that the Jedi Order has lifted its marriage ban for non-Soulmate couples, I thought, why spend the rest of my life alone?”

Anakin catches Qui-Gon’s hand and places a kiss on the back of his fingers. Obi-Wan is going to scream.

When Anakin looks up to the assembled Jedi watching, he doesn’t look at Obi-Wan once. It’s the worst thing in the galaxy, the fact that other than very briefly an hour ago, Anakin hasn’t looked at him at all. It’s been five years. “And I’ve met my soulmate, but they…decided they didn’t want to stay with me, that they didn’t want me.”

Obi-Wan inhales sharply at this and forgets to bite his tongue. “Maybe your soulmate had other obligations that they had to fulfill,” Obi-Wan bites out.

He’d thought Anakin ignoring him had been awful, but that’s nothing compared to the pain of having him look at him with eyes as cold as Hoth. “I think I’d know more about my soulmate than you would, master Jedi. Ah, I’m sorry, I’ve forgotten your name.”

Obi-Wan almost tells him to check his wrist if he needs a reminder about Obi-Wan’s name, but the words get stuck in his throat.

It’s probably for the best.

Obi-Wan’s spent five years and the duration of a war hiding the name of his soulmate from the Jedi Order, and he can’t say it now. His other half has made it quite clear that he can’t say it now.

“Excuse me,” Obi-Wan says, standing suddenly. He knows he should stay, should sit through the rest of the intake interview the Council gives to all non-Jedi sentients that marry a Jedi, soulmates or no, but he can’t. He’s the youngest person to sit on the Council in written history, he’s survived a war, trained the stubbornest Padawan of her generation, and this--this--looking across the table at Anakin Skywalker, dolled up and petty and full of hatred for him as he wears another man’s ring, Obi-Wan’s former master’s ring--this is going to be the thing that kills him.

Luckily, no one tries to stop him as he leaves. Maybe they think he’s just reacting to the fact that his fifty-eight year old master came home with a twenty-five year old husband. Maybe everything he’s feeling is written out on his face. Maybe he should never have tried to hide Anakin away. Maybe he should have called for extraction from his deep cover mission as soon as their hands had touched and their soulmarks had appeared. Maybe these past seven years should never have happened.

Force knows Obi-Wan would sleep easier if he had never walked into that Tatooine bar. If he had never met Anakin Skywalker.

He tries to meditate in his favorite spot in the Room of A Thousand Fountains, but it’s an impossible task. Mostly, he sits in a classic lotus position and broods.

A few hours later, when Obi-Wan thinks he’s recovered some of his composure, the person who’s always been able to ruin it sits himself down in front of him with a lot of unnecessary noise.

“When you talked about this place, I thought it sounded like the biggest waste of water in the entire galaxy,” Anakin’s voice sounds...normal. Like they’re picking up the thread of a conversation they had just dropped a moment ago, as if five years and a wedding and a war don’t stretch between them.

But if Anakin wants to talk to Obi-Wan like they had before, he’ll try his hardest to meet him there. Slowly, he opens his eyes. Anakin’s lounging back, still wearing the ceremonial robes of a Jedi’s bride, the loose blue silk barely hanging onto one of his shoulders. Obi-Wan wants to close his eyes again, immediately. “The greenery wouldn’t be able to survive without the water.”

Anakin nods, looking around as if slightly disinterested by it all. When he’d been eighteen, he’d soaked up every story Obi-Wan could tell him about the Temple, about the Jedi. Those piercing blue eyes find him again. It’s as if he knows Obi-Wan’s thoughts, because he smiles in the most humorless way. “I used to think I’d live here, and then I could see for myself if the beauty was worth the excess.”

“And?” Obi-Wan asks. It’s all he can get out of his throat. It’s very clear what Anakin isn’t saying. That he used to think he’d live here with Obi-Wan. That they'd be--that they'd be.

“Now I understand that there’s no winning that argument. What one man sees as a waste, another might see as a treasure.”

Obi-Wan can’t do this. He thought--maybe he could--but. He can’t. “I’m sorry,” he says quietly, moving to stand on his feet. “I hate to leave, but I must attend to--”

Anakin scrambles to his feet and latches onto Obi-Wan’s covered wrist. “Do you?” he asks intently, his hold tightening. “Did you?”

“This--this is most inappropriate, Chosen Skywalker, please remove yourself from my person.”

Anakin, blast him, moves even closer. Obi-Wan wonders if he can hear his heartbeat from that far away or if it’s just in Obi-Wan’s ears. “You have to tell me,” he demands. He’s always demanded things from Obi-Wan. Stories, and kisses, and comfort, and promises. Obi-Wan had given him everything he’d asked for, up until the very end.

Unsurprisingly, nothing has changed.

“Tell you what,” Obi-Wan snaps, yanking his wrist away from Anakin’s touch. Even through the covering, his skin feels burned. “Tell you that I hated having to leave you? Tell you that I’ve thought about you every night since then? Tell you that there was a war, that I had to fight, that I didn’t choose to go? That I had a duty to the galaxy, to the Jedi, to my family?”

“You had a duty to me!” Anakin snarls back, squaring his shoulders and shoving forward into Obi-Wan’s space. “I was your soulmate and you left me and I waited and you never once called me, never once tried to visit! And then the war ended and you never came back!” His voice breaks and the flood of words Obi-Wan desperately does not want to hear breaks with it for just a second. “Why didn’t you come back? I don’t...I don’t care that you had to fight. I knew I couldn’t leave with you, not until I had freed my mom. But you just. You left.”

“I’m not the same man I was, Anakin,” Obi-Wan says softly. His voice shakes and he has to turn his head away from his soulmate’s watery blue eyes. “The war--it changed me. It hurt, to fight and kill and strategize on how to more effectively fight and kill the next day. Four years of that, and I knew at the end I wasn’t fit to be anyone’s soulmate, least of all yours.”

When Obi-Wan had first met him, Anakin had been laughing. His head had been tipped back, curls falling over his shoulders. The noise had been loud and honest. He’d been radiant in the Force. It had taken weeks for Obi-Wan to really believe something so bright could be the other half of his soul.

“I wanted to,” Obi-Wan whispers. “Every night I wanted to, and it only got harder after the war ended. I never stopped wanting to. Wanting you.”

“How am I supposed to believe you?” Anakin asks. Obi-Wan wants to ask him why it matters if he believes him or not, but Anakin’s words from earlier float back to him. They decided they didn’t want to stay with me, that they didn’t want me. He can’t let Anakin continue to think Obi-Wan didn’t want him, not when he wanted him so badly he ached from it.

With shaking fingers, he moves to pull down the collar of his robes, just far enough that he can pull out the japor snippet he’s worn around his neck since the day Anakin gave it to him. He slowly lifts it over his head and presents it to his soulmate. Anakin’s eyes are wide with wonder as he stares down at the necklace, worm almost smooth by how often Obi-Wan had rubbed the carving with his thumb. “Always, Anakin,” Obi-Wan murmurs, reaching out to grab Anakin’s hand and dropping the wood carving into his palm. He carefully folds the man’s lax fingers around the necklace.

Hating himself for doing it, but needing to do it anyway, he brushes his lips over his fingers in a ghost of a kiss. Beneath his mouth, the wedding band feels warm from Anakin’s body heat. It’s a shockingly cold reminder.

“May the Force bless you and your Chosen, and reunite you at every end of your every day,” Obi-Wan whispers the Council’s official blessings for newly-wed couples into Anakin’s skin.This is the last time he’s ever going to touch him. He doesn’t want to let go.

He must. He does.

#qui-gon definitely knew anakin was obi-wans soulmate when they started talking #he was like my dumb former padawan will not let himself be happy #so im going to wingman the shit out of him #by marrying his soulmate so they have to see each other again #and hopefully even talk about everything!#this cannot possibly go wrong #(it did)#but obi-wan and anakin end up together because qui-gon and anakin have their marriage annulled to the relief of everyone #asks #obikin #my fics #if all these prompts are going to be 1500 + words I do not know how fast i will finish them #but im trying #it's doing wonders for my writers block #prompt fill

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