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rzyraffek · 9 months

Note

Hello I have a NSFWish?? Request could you do Eddie Gluskin and maybe Brahms W a pervy s/o? Like always checking them out, grabbing their booty and pecs - I know you've done some NSFWish stuff and this isn't explicit so I thought it'd be okie!

Thank you!!

- 🎨

O my god your a genius, I swear those guys are not expecting that! I hope that you don't mind adding few characters 😈 rest of notes at the end

They/them, Request open (yeah I know im taking long time to write but its summer time this person (me) is going o u t s i d e )

Slashers with pervy s/o

Eddie Gluskin

BRO TAKES IT AS INVITATION

Litteraly slaps their ass back

Kinda suprised at first, not used to people being so straightforward with him... and so brave... and- oh my darling your so...so...

bro caught simping

When they slapped him first time he just slowly turns around, he is about to whoop that ass HARDD

I swear anything playfully or just straightforward creepy/pervy this dude sees as flirt and a suggestion

But completely oblivious to their stares and eyes wandering in places, untill he looks at them directly he won't notice, BCS NOONE EVER YKNOW DID THAT TO HIM HE DOESNT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT

Brahms Heelshire

I just realised that hes name is so british... omg just say it out loud BRAHMS HeelSHIRE this dude is more british than queen herself (rip btw) LIKE IF anyone in amercia or anywhere else really was named brahms fucking heelshire he would be bullied so hard. Tbh maybe that's why he's in walls

Feels threatened... he was suppose to be pervy one! Not his s/o :((

At least you guys have fun running around mansion and slapping eachothers ass??? Yay relationship goals!!!

Man says "I mean I support equal rights" just to trow them from stairs or something

Also HE LITTERALY BLUSHES when they touch him normally NOW IMAGINE IF S/O does that to his bootie

"Are you checking me out again? Stoophh"

Pls he just tries to cuddle when he feels their arms slowly moving lower and lower and- hold up what do you think your doing love?🤨😳

Asa Emory

Nuh uh

You dont

He will litteraly cut their hands off if they try to do anything skechy

Hes so dreamy

Pov: asa just cutting vegetables for dinner, vibing, then suddenly out of dark corridor, emerges goblin-like creature (s/o) with evil grin, running to attack him, he tries to dogde it, but their evil arms are too quick, goblin smacks his ass so hard he collapses(dramatically), Asa feels the wave of embarrassment and dies immediately

Its currently 4am

Tbh he kinda likes the attention, like s/o is such a simp for him rn, his ego loves itttt

If some stuff doesr make sense im sorry, its 4am and I want to clear my inbox asap cuz I feel bad for all people that are waiting for my fics. Although you still can request!!! Im just trying to get some ideas for old ones (cuz tbh some of yall dont really have ideas for requests and just say "write for this dude ok bye" 😔😔 plz ily all but I cant work with that, I need some sort of idea, even boring one or overused

#slasher x reader #slasher headcanons #brahms x reader #asa emory x reader #the collector x reader #brahms heelsire #eddie gluskin x reader #eddie gluskin #eddie x reader #request open

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emoangel44 · 2 months

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very curious abt your noelle concept actually... as you said about your vintage wedding dress design. can you go into depth abt that i really wanna know the thoughts behind it!

okok.... i made a post about noelle and kris being "toxic relationship divorcecore" right after chapter 2 came out this post will be basically explaining what that means. the snowgrave (or weird route but i will use snowgrave as this refers specifically to the chapter 2 weird route and may not apply to later chapters) does a lot of cool shit (like if you want the "purposely mimicking a video game creepypasta" rant just ask) but my personal favourite is how it like... kind of forces a relationship between between kris and noelle.

in order activiate and/or get the most out of it in the first place you have to various things including:

1. give noelle a ring(s) for her to wear as a weapon

2. insist that you will ride the ferris wheel with her (which she usually does with susie. her crush)

3. steal noelles clothes and wear them yourself (her watch but still)

4. tell the shopkeeper you're "something else" instead of friends

all of these will make noelle very uncomfortable.

spamton also calls noelle a "hochi mama" (which is a word for "whore", basically) and your ""side chick". aswell as this, if you believe spamtons "hyperlink blocked" means love (which i personally do) he also makes a double-meaning comment about kris and noelle "making (love)".

after the snowgrave route noelle will start to notice kris first in a room when she usually always notices susie first (again. her crush).

my personal interpretation of this is that it is a method of trying to make you (the player) uncomfortable by effectively making you play a really weird game of smashing dolls faces together with characters you like who are having an awful time. it does this by kinda playing with both forced heteronormivity (by forcing the nonbinary kris into a masculine role and forcing noelle, likely a lesbian, into a weird straight-gender-roled relationship she doesnt want) and their family histories of unhappy marriages (with both asgore and toriel as well as rudy and mayor holiday). this is a subversion of how in the normal route you allow kris and noelle to reconnect and become closer in yknow... a normal way.

there is also an argument to be made that the same "make the player feel uncomfortable and bad for fucking up kris' life for their own desires" thing might also be being done with ralsei and his weird crush on kris/us? and him looking like fucking identical to asriel and that making us fans (the guys who made all those "save the goat" aus) want to get closer to him and making kris be not a fan of the fact a guy that looks like their brother keeps flirting with them and that it might be trying to play with like incest-baiting the same way the snowgrave stuff is with that other stuff i mentioned but yknow. not getting into that

#raxz.ask #deltarune #kris dreemurr #noelle holiday #snowgrave #weird route #analysis

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applesupply · 1 year

Text

♡TRUNKS X MALE READER

Goten and trunks were at school before class starting so they were just by the lockers standing around

"God hes so annoying but so handsome for no reason" trunks complained "Bro please for the love of god this is like what the 100th time you went on and on about ur boy crush on y/n like theres other topics you y'know "

"AH I HAVENT BEEN TALKING ABOUT HIM THAT LONG" goten was really annoyed by this child at any moment he was just gonna fuckin smaxk the shit outta him "Ow bro loud as fuck and why dont you just confess ur literally heart out to him" Goten really needed Trunks to man up and confess like the worse is a no right?

"Its not that simple were both guys idk if you noticed he probably likes girls or something and even if he likes guys I probably wouldn't be an option like have you seen him?" Trunks really was overthinking again it's a pretty bad habit of his I mean sure hes a genius thinker like his mother but he sure has a lot on his mind especially with handling school and fighting or training and even you

"Ur like hella gay dude like man up and just give him a kiss or something " Goten really wanted this topic to change it's always about you for like what? forever now "I'm not gonna just kiss hi-" the bell rang

Goten was really happy to just go to class for once in his life it's not fun hearing your best just straight up talk about a guy when he doesnt man up and talk to him Goten thinks Trunks doesnt really talk to him now that he thinks about it does he even talk to him? Oh well

Trunks sat in his first period ah yes the best class Math doesnt matter which class it's all math and it all sucks but at least he gets to sit next to you his lovely crush his little boy crush

Honestly you dont really pay attention or anything you kinda just sit there and doodle in your notebook some notes here and there but other than that you're either spacing out or sleeping Trunks thinks you look nice while sleeping weird I know he thinks hes weird for finding you lovely while just passed tf out on your desk

But today you were awake somehow it's a catch up day yknow where you get all ur work turned in that's late or overdue or summatives all that jaz

"Can you help me on this worksheet I think I was sleeping when we were doing this topic" what Trunks snapped out of his gaze and looks at you You YOU YOU TALKED TO HIM hes just gonna blow up right then and there god you're just so- hes sitting there and staring too long you probably think hes an idiot or stupid

"Uh yeah I sure can let me see" trunks replied a bit hesitant but nonetheless the words were fine and it was better than rushing I guess

Yall say there for a but trying to work on this worksheet apparently you did infact slept on that day trunks had a bit trouble on the topic but he still nailed it down and yall got it done together

"Thanks man very nice of you" You offered him a fist bump which he gave one right back god you touched his hand he thought now he was thinking of yall holding hands god how much he wanted to do that he wanted to do a lot of things with you

If you dont think theres a lot of things just ask goten I'm sure he remembers after all Trunks literally talks documentaries about you all the time

As you turned in the paper work you sat back down you were either debating sleeping or just going on your phone trying to hide it from your teacher you decided the latter

Trunks was seriously thinking about this morning he really liked you and wanted to know if you feel the same he looked over at you and you were on your phone sheesh you were bad at hiding it and your screen

He saw it theres a picture of him on your phone? Excuse me why huh did you like him did you feel the same he must've been looking a little too long because you noticed and pulled the phone to your chest really close and a little far up so

"Y/n L/n is that a phone I see give it here" The teacher's voice boomed god he hated that teacher they were so annoying for no reason

The teacher went over and took Y/n's phone and went back to their next what a bitch he thought

"You didn't see anything did you" Trunks thoughts were interrupted when he heard you "I saw a pic of me?" He soon replied

"AH I'm sorry dude that's embarrassing" you seemed so ashamed of yourself for being caught

"That's ok maybe when you get your phone back at the end of the day I could maybe give you my number?" Bold move trunks he thought he sure was you looked at him you were so red in the face but you laughed it off

"yeah dude I'll love your number"

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foxythesimp · 2 years

Text

KOKICHI FLUFF ALPHABET!!

(Sorry if the “art” is wonky i am in desperate need of ✨ibispaint X✨ Also I did have to find this from like 50 different blogs (to like get the copy and paste for the Alphabet) so Credit to all of them!)

A = Attractive (What do they find attractive about their partner?)

Your Hands. When he holds your hand it assures him your not leaving or going anywhere, it’s also fun to just grab your hand and drag you around.

B = Baby (Do they want a family? Why/Why not?)

I feel like he would want a family. Not like a big big family maybe like a kid or two, but be warned because as soon as these kids are born/adopted he’s molding them to be a mini-him already. Teaching them pranks and probably trying to give them panta which you have to make sure he doesn’t.

C = Cuddle (How do they like to cuddle?)

Kokichi likes to sleep basically on top of you, he’s pretty short and doesn’t weight much so it isn’t that uncomfortable. He likes to have his head on your chest, while the rest of his body is half on top of you and half awkwardly sprawled off of you.

D = Dates (What kind of Dates do you go on?)

Kokichi really loves going in Carnival Dates He loves Going on rides, eating Cotton Candy, drinking Panta, and Playing games with you at the Carnival (Bonus Points if you decide to help him out with a prank or two for Unsuspecting Victims.) But sometimes he just wants to spend time with you alone in your room, cuddling, watching movies, or really anything like that.

E = Everything (You are my ____ (e.g. my life, my world…)

You are my Second in Command!

F = Feelings (When did they know they’re in love?)

When you Offered to Help out with some of his Pranks. That moment when you were laughing alongside him, he could’ve sworn you looked so angelic and his heart fluttered. At that moment he knew he was in love.

G = Gratitude (How grateful are they in general? Are they aware of what their S/O does for them?)

Oh boy, he is so grateful for you. I mean like- Your his second in Command, His partner in Crime. To say he’s grateful is an understatement.

H = Honesty (Do they have secrets they hide from their S/O?)

Obviously, he’s Kokichi Ouma. No matter how deep you two go into your relationship, there are some secrets he will never spill to you.

I = Impression (First impressions?)

At first, he’d think nothing of you, see you as another target but after a bit he starting thinking your more interesting then you look.

J = Jealousy (Do they get jealous? How do they deal with it)

oh this boy gets so jealous. Not always, but definitely a lot. When he starts feeling jealous his first attempt to get your attention is to try and pry you away from the person your talking to.

“s/ooo! I’m boredd…Let’s play a game together okay?”

He’d say with his signature grin, only to groan in annoyance when you wave him off, telling him ‘Later, I’m busy’ or something. When he starts to get desperate it’s really Just him fake sobbing and pulling on your arm

“WAAAAAAAAH, S/O DOESNT LOVE ME ANYMORE”

he’d Yell until you give in and pay attention to him.

K = Kiss (How do they kiss you? How do they like to be kissed?)

Around the others (D.I.C.E) he enjoys giving you random pecks throughout the day, just to fluster you, But in Private he’ll wrap his arms around your neck and pull you in for a passionate kiss that he’ll definitely tease you for. It’s mainly just because of how much blush you have but also to draw more attention to your face then his raging red cheeks.

L = Love (Who says ‘I love you’ first?)

he probably says it a few times before, in a joking matter, until one day you seemed particularly down. He pulled you aside to see why his Second in command was acting so strange and when you explained your problems, his toned dropped and his face went serious

“s/o, Yknow I love you right? And I don’t like it when people I love feel bad.” he’d say before immediately going back to his normal tone and smiling. “So why don’t we take the day off, I was getting bored anyways.”

M = Memory (What’s their favorite memory together?)

You weren’t feeling good, and as Kokichi’s Second in Command, Feeling Down is a No-Go. That night you and him stayed up til 3:00 am drinking Panta and playing random games. You were the first to fall asleep, Leaning onto Kokichi as you lightly snored. It’s those little moments Kokichi Cherishes

N = Nickel (Do they spoil? Do they buy the person they love everything?)

Well Kokichi Certainly isn’t the wealthiest, but he isn’t overly poor either. He’ll probably spoil you with things like snacks or drinks he knows you like.

O = On Cloud Nine (What are they like when they’re in love? Is it obvious for others? How do they express their feelings?)

It’s really hard to tell if Kokichi actually likes you or if he’s just being an obnoxious little shit. He starts to get bolder and teases you a lot more. Nothing terrible, just- like teasing you in the flirtatious way. He also wants to be around you 24/7 like a clingy toddler.

P = Pet names (What pet names do they use?)

Second in Command, Partner in Crime, Dear, Babe.

Q = Quaint (What’s their favorite non-modern thing)

I don’t know if this counts but Kokichi really likes going to Arcades, if an Arcade even CROSSES his line of vision, you best believe all of the plans are cancelled and your spending the rest of the day in the arcade with him.

R = Rainy Day (What do they like to do on a rainy day?)

Rainy days are kinda like Lazy days for him. He’ll probably just host a big movie night for everyone as you all drink random drinks and watch childrens movies. At the end of the night he’s normally cuddled right up at your side.

S = Sad (How do they cheer themselves/S/O up?)

He tries to lighten the mood. Teasing you a little, but if it’s really something bad he’ll bring over his Switch and a four litre bottle of grape Panta and clay down with you while you two play games and drink Panta to clear your mind.

T = Talking (What do they like to talk about?)

Pranks and things that fall into that category, that’s excluding you. He doesn’t like taking about you, he LOVES talking about you- or more specifically, bragging about you.

U = Understanding (How well do they know their partner? Are they empathetic?)

Kokichi probably knows you better then you know yourself. It’s almost as if his emotions are in tune with yours. When your uncomfortable in a place, he’s uncomfortable, your getting pissed off, hes getting pissed off, ect.

V = Value (How important is the relationship to them? What is it worth in comparison to other things in their life?)

you are VERY important, and so is your relationship. Sure Kokichi isn’t very open and sure he keeps secrets but it’s all to keep you safe, and partially so you don’t hate him. Of course D.I.C.E still matters, their practically his family! but that doesn’t mean you arnt important!

W = Wedding (When, where, and how do they propose?)

You two would be at a Carnival date. he’d literally force you onto the Ferris wheel, wait til you two are at the top and hold your hands, flashing a small smile as he slips the box into your hands. He watches you open the box, then when you look up, he’s smiling lovingly at you as he says 5 words in probably the most sincere tone you’ve ever heard him.

“S/o will you marry me?”

X = XOXO (How affectionate are they? In public/in private)

he is very adamant on PDA, unless your really uncomfortable with it then he’ll dial it back a few notches. Of course if your not and are also a firm PDA lover, he is all on you, jumping on your back for piggyback rides, kissing your cheeks, holding your hands, hugging you tightly, all of the things you can imagine, he’ll be doing. In private his affection is like dialed up to 1000 because this man will be all over you, your hanging out in your bed, cool but remember that your his personal pillow, oh your eating? Well he wants a kiss, Literally is all over you and he just wants to kiss he living face off of ya!. Kokichi does have intimate moments though! Sometimes he’ll just lay with you, put on a movie and mumble how much he loves you as he lightly peppers your face with kisses.

Y = Yearning (How well do they cope when they’re separated from their S/O?)

Well Kokichi HATES being separated from you, your like- His other half! He can’t survive without you! He ends up complaining a lot to dice and crying for you all the time. When you come back he’s already on top of you and hugging you, saying how you can never leave him again.

Z = Zeal (Are they willing to go to great lengths for the relationship?)

Kokichi would take a bullet for you, he would protect you with his life and that’s a fact. No if’s, and’s, or but’s. He loves you too much and cannot stand losing you. If you and him get into an argument, he’s already regretting it. if he really hurt you or ends up driving you to tears, he’ll instantly be by your side, apologizing in a joking matter and start kissing your tears away.

AAAAND DONE!! This took me a while and I’m really sorry if there are any grammar mistakes or if this is really shitty- I struggle with motivation a lot, and it’s hard to write digitally because of autocorrect and sometimes words just cross my vision or I misread something and miss the error! Anyways thanks for reading and don’t hesitate to request!!

#kokichi x reader #danganronpa fanfiction #kokichi ouma x reader #kokichi alphabet

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getitoffyourchestofficial · 6 months

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hi this is a lot im sorry. i love to say words and dump shit that upsets me with no real correlation. my bad /gen (genuine) (idk if you know tone indicators im sorry ough)

you dont really Have to cook up a proper response to this i just need to put it somewhere where i wont immediately get piles of advice that i cant use. i know its well-meaning but ultimately the whole situation is ou of anyones control

(also putting this 🎪 here so i can try to find it later)

im stuck in a sisyphean nightmare of a weekly cycle: i have a good day -> my mood skyrockets -> i have a bad day -> my mood plummets -> rinse and repeat. at this point i think it might be a mental condition bc something doesnt even really have to Ruin My Day, i just have to face a minor inconvenience and then suddenly im all doom-and-gloom depression for 3-5 business days before springing back up as if nothing ever happened to do it all again. my mom says i might have bpd or bipolar disorder (i always get the two confused) because she has it and we just havent seen anyone about it, mostly because we dont have the money to see any doctors most of the time. i also kinda dont wanna have either of them? not in like an asshole way but in a these-people-face-stigma-that-i-dont-know-if-i-can-emotionally-handle way. in a im already queer and fat and poor and disabled in multipled ways and overall unsavory to neurotypicals/cishets/Default Settings way. yknow

todays inciting incident was a shitty shitty halloween carnival that didnt even have the thing i was excited for, didnt have any food, had lines that were miles long (hyperbole), was too hot, and i only got 8 shitty halloween things from -- half of which were lollipops, with half of those just being the same 2 flavors but Again. we stayed for 2 hours before my mom decided she didnt wanna be out of the house anymore as usual. i cant be too mad at her because shes mentally ill in the direction of "i dont want to go anywhere because my anxiety will spike" but unfortunately im mentally ill in the direction of "if i cannot leave the house to Do Things at my own pace at least once a week i will fall into a deep depression" so we clash pretty bad most of the time. this was also following multiple minor inconveniences mind you. and was also trailed by multiple minor inconveniences. it just has not gone well. this halloween is just shaping up to suck bc i was supposed to have a whole party but we had money issues so it had to be cut down to just 2 people for a sleepover, then one of them went out to see his grandma in another state and the other is apparently in the fucking hospital right now??? at least according to his posts. and i cant blame them for these either! schedules conflict and sometimes you go to the Fuckig Hosital. its out of anyones control but it still feels like shit. so its looking like my only shot at having any fun this halloween is the trunk-or-treat at my school and idk if im even allowed to go bc i had to drop out for mental health reasons and they told me i wasnt allowed on school grounds anymore. idk if that applies here. which btw. way to make a depressed kid feel worse. you can NEVER come to this high school again or we'll ARREST YOU. fuckin bullshit. BUT thats off topic the synopsis is that this halloween sucks so far and i dont really expect it to get better which extra sucks bc im turning 18 next year and i dont wanna let this be the last hurrah for my number one favorite holiday. i cant host fucking parties for my friends after then. im gonna be busy trying to fuck off to the other end of the country. i wont have TIME for it. idk. it sucks. this sucks. fuck art and fuck you /ref (reference) /nbh (nobody here)

Ik you don't want advice for this so I'll just put it on the blog.

And idk if you want it but here's a tea

☕

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sixtypackofcrayola · 2 years

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👁👁 LMK GENSHIN AU??? I AM L I S T E N I N G

OK OK A COUPLE PEOPLE ASKED SO HERE I GO NO THIS WILL NOT BE FORMALLY WRITTEN :SMILE: 'm just gonna ramble!! aannndd hope i make some kinda sense theresss gonna be some holes and things i havent come up with n ill mention them but ppl are lucky ta fill stuff in with their own ideas n feed this brainrot<33

okaayyy so first is mk right so abt mk's vision,, mk is like the last in the little hero group to get a vision. hes been tryin for SO LONG to get one and ever since mei got hers hes been kinda more driven to get one himself. he knows theres like- special circumstances involved n hes been tryin to like get that cool thing to happen so they can get theirs but,,, nothins worked yet yknow mk like tries to make guess abt what vision theyre gonna get one day and mei thinks mk is gonna get pyro and like woah cool just like his da-- i mean pigsy!!! so hes not sayin itd be his one and only choice but thinkin about it and what tang has said abt visions he thinks pyro is def possible bc hes real passionate about a lot of things!! like his job and his friendships and MONKEY KING LORE and yknow all that good stuff so he gets it after doin somethin similar to the big fight at the end of a hero is born just- beatin' the SHIT out dbk ig along with his friends and while hes there and struggling but knowin he has to defeat this guy for the sake of everyone he ends up getting his vision and he doesnt focus on the element too much (it does end up being geo) at first its more just HOW TF DO I USE THIS NOW.. but he ends up doin somethin real wacky and BOOM dbk gone 4 now and like after all that is over n we're back to chilling he and the others r like celebrating bc WOO mk got his vision AND we defeating a huge demon!! and mei is like huh i really thought u were gonna get pyro like me and tang is like pushes up glasses well acTUALLY-- and proceeds to explain why geo visions r given to people and all that and while mk does have a lot of passion which would make it make sense 4 him to have a pyro vision hes far more hardworking with his job already and now that hes monkey kid hes gonna b working even harder to protect people mk's been working hard all his life really, not just with his job and now defeating demons, hes been working hard to get a vision so he could be something greater, his bio parents he doesnt remember much about but they were always so unimpressed and demanding so he tried real hard to live up to their expectations and make them happy because he wants his friends and family 2 be happy,, and hes always tried hard to be something more than what he is as he got older and all the monkey king stories really inspired him a lot and thats why hes loved all this lore and stuff for so many years but like,, he could never be a hero like that,,, oh wait anywho mk is a geo polearm(?) user, dunno if ya could call the staff a polearm buuut thats what im goin' with hes also got monkey king's abilities along with the geo ones so ohu boy,, ill talk more abt that part when i get to wukong and mac ALSO I FEEL LIKE MK COULD ALSO BE PYRO AND I COULD CHANGE IT BUT,, I LIKE GEO TOO,,,, oops all pyro traffic light trio????

next is mei who is a pyro sword,, i dont know much abt her backstory/vision story yet sooo if ya wanna spit some ideas im all ears BC I FEEL BAD NOT HAVIN MORE STUFF FOR HER

i dont got much for red son either buuut heres what i do got; red son kinda already has,, magic of sorts bc,, yknow partial demon (in this hes only like,, half technically. yknow how yanfei is like half adeptus-) but its amplified a bunch by the vision and WOO FIRE and theyre a pyro catalyst honestly debating on whether or not they wold have a book or whatever that other floaty thingy is called but like when i imagine either they kinda look similar to dodoco tales or blackcliff agate hmm,, red's two big passions are building and cooking- his tech could possibly rival that of fontaine's advancements if he wanted it to,, they actually take some inspiration from the works of fontaine as well as for the cooking, u already know, spice master. i want a cooking battle with them and xiangling- they'd laugh at the hottest option on the menu at wanmin red son got their vision pretty early in life- a bit older than he was in canon,, which was still a problemmm and ya can guess why,, demon power fire element amplification little tempermental fire demon boy go boom boom samadhi fire or somethin,, so yeah theyre not as powerful as they could be and the vision was actually taken from them until they were older and more mature i suppose red doesnt remember this- they think they got their vision at an older age since it kinda just appeared by him one morning

tang is dendro but like he doesnt fight so he hasnt found a weapon yet- i think itd be real funny if he was a CLAYMORE or maybe a sword bc of that one episode yknow the one,, but honestly catalyst could work too and hed def have a book one if so dont got a backstory or vision story for him either :( nor do i have much for pigsy but pyro,, somethin. y'all can add to pigsy's stuff if ya want i also feel bad for not havin anything for him but passion = cooking woo

sandy,, hydro catalyst def and hed have a book one too,, i think its a little funny seein this huge ass dude and ur like "oh he could totally wield a claymore" and he could but hes got his little magic book and could still beat the shit out of anyone (not that he would unless needed,, but he COULD)

mo. thats it. just mo.

now to the two givin me the most trouble,,,, wukong and macaque i didnt think too much abt what visions macaque and wukong would have bc like,, they have a lot of powers that could fit each vision really and i was like "AUGH should wukong be pyro or geo or maybe anemo???" and like "should macaque be cryo maybe but agghh electro could also fit but GAH" could they be like,, adepti maybe?? m not sure,, im thinkin adepti with no like specified element but aaauuggh or maybe its a traveler sort of deal with like all the elements but i like the adeptus thing a bit more- then again uhh genshin lore,,,,, yeah i can not keep up with all of it</3 so if it makes no sense it makes no sense,, y'all might have 2 catch me up if somehow they wouldnt b able to be adepti but i still wanna keep somethin similar to monkey king's whole story n whatnot,,

last thing uh,, mk part adeptus or at least starting to match adeptal power now that hes got the staff and monkey king powers?? not sure again genshin lore is,, tricky and then that plus the geo vision

wellll thats all i gots for now,, if i come up with more ill post it, but for nows this is the basis again feel free ta add or share thoughts cause this is very unfinished and like one of those things u think of and throw into ur notes at like 5am and i somehow put no thought and a ton of thought into it at the same time<//3 OK THANKS 4 LISTENING TO MY DUMB MONKEY PLUS GENSHIN THINGY

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adhbabey · 1 year

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hope its ok im responding to ur post abt paych critical! it is so relatable! there are lots of things i appreciate abt the psych critical/antipsych community & movement but i also like. dont understand why in the world so many ppl are like overwhelmingly against therapy. obv it doesnt work for everyone! ik its not available or accessible for everyone! but its such a vast & varied field and such an adaptable thing that like. i don’t think i’ll ever get why ppl direct their anger towards those of us who *do* benefit from therapy or find it a useful tool for recovery. yknow. what good does infighting do!!! who does that serve!! this has turned into shouting into the void a little bit, sorry about that

Yeah it's fine. Honestly I'm pretty anti psych about a lot of things, like the fact that people are abused or mistreated in medical situations and that people are forced to take medication, have their rights stripped away, etc.

And I, too, hate that people call their partners by words taken from disorders. Like, you shouldn't call people "narcissistic" or "psychotic" as an insult. Pathologicizing abusers is just really fucking harmful and stupid. The whole thing is misunderstanding why those words exist in the first place and just scapegoating mentally ill people.

But this doesn't mean words like dissociation, triggers, panic attack, depression, manipulation, gaslighting, etc. don't have their purpose and it doesn't mean everyone is misusing them. And it is just stupid to assume everyone is, and that's the problem with some people who are anti-psych.

Some people view professional help and medical terms and diagnoses as bad, and it just makes them sound like the people they disagree with. I'm psych critical, not against helpful tools and professional treatment. They should be used with consent and with autonomy. Removing and gatekeeping information and resources is what's bad.

I'm extremely pro-self diagnosis. Partly because I am psych critical and partly because I think we have the intelligence to figure things out for ourselves. That crazy people aren't too crazy to know that they are "crazy". That we have the ability to recognize the fact that something is wrong.

Self diagnosing people aren't stupid for taking medical knowledge and applying it to themselves, they're not pathologicizing all human experiences, and I think that people who argue that are dumb.

So like. There is a middle ground that people aren't noticing, because they lean too heavily to one side. I can't function without medication, but I'm terrified of being institutionalized and my family is somewhat ableist, so I struggle to find an option to get help. I think most people on the internet have found themselves in similar situations.

So like, the whole "stop pathologizing human experience" and that people say "the tiktokification of the internet is bad", like bitch, we all loved Vine. The whole thing is just missing the understanding that people are striving for accessibility and education, not whoever the fuck that takes it too far.

So yeah, thanks for sending an ask to let me talk about this more. Therapy does not solve all your problems, especially if your therapist is not the right one. But it's something people should still try and seek. Maybe it's helpful, maybe it's not.

But the fact of the matter is, is that people are literally just using terms to understand their experiences. Sometimes they'll take it too far, but there is a middle ground. There will always be normal and reasonable opinions within it, we should listen.

#babey posts #psych critical

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jadejetts · 8 months

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aagh!! big ol vent so feel free to skip if youre not into that biz thoughts about wanting to make music and not being able to do that

i need to make more music!! (i say more bc ive made small little pieces before) but like!! the current way i do it feels way too slow and i end up losing my energy to do so way before i get anything substantial done >:[ though a major part of that losing energy bit definitely has to do with not knowing a lot of just. how to make music in general. i can kinda create melodies? but things like chords and backing and instrumentation- basically Everything that isn't just coming up with the lead i have a lot of trouble with. but having to place and adjust every single note by hand doesnt help i think!! gscklbhcvhkl ive got a digital piano from my youth somewhere (that i never used bc i didnt care at the time) but idk where it is and even if i did find it i dont really have a spot to put it in!! and while i dont really know how to play the piano? i feel like maybe itd feel quicker anyway, just playing notes instead of piecing it all together but i dunno!! maybe getting the piano out isnt the right way anyway?? i still need to learn like. the base fundamentals. but that feels Stupid tough!! and i know its gonna be stupid tough!! everything at the beginning is!! but trying to get over that first initial hump is the woooorst maybe i just need to like. just keep doin what im doin. yknow? make small 10 second little doodles of stuff. little steps!! i'll get there eventually i think. just didnt feel too well about my whole sitch tonight

music means. a Lot lot to me. i am constantly listening to Something (currently this as i write) practically every second im awake and at my desk. and ive wanted to give back for years!! and ive felt bad for not being able to do so

art is a gift. not a gift as in "the natural gift to do something" but as in like. a present. recently every piece of music ive listened to has felt like a giant gift, it always gives me an emotional spike. be it happiness or pure adrenaline. (i really like intense music gscvklhckl) sometimes that emotional spike gets to the point where i feel physically tired after the spike falls! and i would like to think that one day i'll be able to make something that gives that same feeling to others- or at the very least myself!

creation is a fickle thing huh gscvklhcvkl

#venting #jade jetts rambles

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acaciapines · 11 months

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it feels like in your fics, daemon settling is presented as a bad thing! can I ask where that is coming from, and what settling means there if it's not about adolescence?

dklfngnkdfgdf i was wondering when someone would ask me this.

the answer is that it depends on the story im trying to tell, and it just so happens that the one im currently writing (toh daemon au) and to a lesser extent the one im posting (pmmm daemon au) have themes in their original shows that just so happen to best support this reading of daemons! like, if you read some of my other stuff, ex the wolf 359 daemon au, its nothing like this lol, my daemon lore does not carry across unrelated fics.

the best way i can describe it is through the unposted owl house daemon au so apologies in advance. also spoiler warning for the fic series. it doesnt exist yet but a lot of this stuff is things we learn throughout the series.

essentially, though, when i am writing a daemon au, there is always some particular aspect of the original media that i think i could explore in depth by adding daemons! in wolf 359 it was this idea of personhood, and so that is what i focused on when adapting my daemon lore in those fics. in toh, its this idea of growing up and being forced to choose things.

if you look at luz, in toh, her story is very much about this idea of like. in a lot of isekai stories the protagonist goes home at the end, yknow? this is what is supposed to happen, they learn something in this new world, and then go home changed, but they GO HOME. but the whole thing with luz is that like--the human world wasnt ever her home, not really. the only person she had there was her mom. but in the boiling isles, now, THAT is a home for her!

but...shes supposed to go back to the human realm. shes not supposed to stay. and so a lot of her arc, to me (and what i choose to focus on in my au) is this idea of what you are 'supposed' to do (ie what society says is acceptable) and what actually makes you happy, and is the life you want to live. in the show, this accumulates in luz's palisman (daemon equivalent, basically) not just being one animal, but being a snake that can shift into a whole lot of other animals--it is this way of showing that like. luz never had to choose. to force her to choose is something about society that is sorta fucked up. its this idea that we act like kids are able to figure out their entire future, that you make a choice and that determines your life forever. but like...no? you can change! thats AMAZING, that people are able to change!

and so to tell that story daemon settling has to be about something you are forced into too young. that to act like a 14 year old can figure out their entire future and never have the possibility to change later down the line and make another choice and figure out something new is...bad, actually? life doesnt end when youre young!

or something like that lol i always always believe i will say what im trying to say better in the actual text of the story itself vs trying to write it all out like that.

and to be fair a lot of this also comes from the fact that all of my daemon aus are in conversation with typical daemon aus that pop up in fandoms, and also to an extent daemons as they are seen in his dark materials, because i have A Lot Of Feelings about it, and a lot of daemon aus are just...not about daemons. and i like telling stories ABOUT daemons, not just stories where the characters happen to have an animal companion sometimes. and this is especially true of the owl house daemon au bc the entire way im building up the human world and how it works is um. um its just stuff i think sucks in most daemon aus/hdm and why i think that.

anyways. tl;dr: daemons are about whatever the core of the story i want to tell is and it just so happens in the stuff im writing right now daemon settling being a negative fits that core.

you (general) can always send me more specific followups about this too! i am literally always down to talk about daemons and daemon aus bc This Is My Thing i have decided and i love love love talking about it.

#ask #daemons #daemon au #daetalk #truly one of the best times i had on this blog #was after i posted my daemon essays #n i had a bunch of asks coming in about daemons #I LOVE TALKING ABOUT EM OK......#i just feel like im the only one writing my weird lil daemon aus #and i need more people to play w me in this space.#(tbf i havent actually gone digging through the daemon au tag in a long time #so there could be good stuff in there now #but the last time i did it i just. for my own tastes most daemon aus do not do it for me)

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whorewithagodcomplex · 11 months

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sweetheart,

i love ya, but I'm not doing that for the rest of my life, no sir,

everyone knows not to marry into that, and its kinda common sense not to date someone with your type of addiction and just walk away, like we all know its never gonna work if youre constantly making your partner feel like shit because youre always lusting of the things you so desperately want, and yeah you may say that 'your're better, real, youre my love theyre just pictures, theyre just videos, ect) but we all know you wish it was them you could have when your gazing longingly and thirstly at those pictures, you create relationships with all these women, i just happen to be in person version added to the collection, its nasty, and its horrible knowing this will likely never change, cause its 'not that bad' its 'a comfort thing' 'i was alone for so long' and i have to live feeling like im always competing with them, i cant escape them, im so fucking tired of being paranoid that the person i love is going to always be looking at something more appealing, its awful, that constant pit in your stomach everytime hes lookin at a female character a little too closely, or when the girls are everywhere for him, camera roll, most social media, even his wallpapers on all devices, sure theres a photo of you two, sure as a homescreen but its really just a sunset photo and we're hidden in a low corner hidden by apps, and the never paying that close attention to you, you learn as much as you can about him listen to every word he says but doesnt care to know about you, with the exception of major plot points he knows nothing about what you like and why you like it, its either you rarely get a chance to speak, or youre perpetually cut off, or just simply ignored when speaking about yourself, but, he knows everything they say, knows every little detail, their backstories are phenominal and look how hot they are, he wont really say that to you anymore youve shown you dislike, but you know, you always know, so you try your best to be pretty and good enough to be wanted like he wants them, but you never get wanted like that, to be fair you never did, this was the first time someone is showing they love you and want you, but of course if i wasnt wantable before him what makes me wantable now? yknow all his needs are met by them and his ablilty to do so much with them that he feels no need to pay any mind to you beyond the physical and guidance, yeah he loves you, you know that hes shown that, but is it worth the mental and emotional exhaustion it takes to fight for a normal relationship? one where we both feel happy? i know theres no way he isnt miserable too, the contant bickering the anxiety of fucking up, but c'mon man, if you cope properly, like by speaking (without lashing out) to someone when things are too much, not falling further into an obsessive chemical pick-me-up addiction and honestly this sex obsession, youd do so much better, but you wont because its one of them hidden addictions that no one but your friends and people youre close to know about, by your choice, and you think that means its totally fine, because I'll stick around regardless right? cause i have this long and im making life plans with you and i love you more than youll ever know and as long as i dont see it' or notice it its fine, it wont kill me, youll keep going until im about to cut my losses and you promise and youll try you really will, but itll creep back and we'll be back at square one, or youll get better at hiding it from me, youre already pretty good at it now, ill bet money that if i got 3 hours and all your passwords id find cia sized files everywhere and id puke and cry myself to sleep for months, and i know youll only get better at it, and i dont want to be paranoid that your girls are still around my whole life, what kind of example am i setting for my daughters if i just let myself live like that, god id kill my son-in-law if he made her feel like that, honestly id kill him for most of the things youve done, so why am i letting it happen to me???

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ourflagmeansgayrights · 2 years

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re. people fanoning Izzy as Super Working Class I think they’re often making a (patronising, inaccurate) generalisation about (English) Northern accents. That’s never been a one-to-one mapping for class and income and is DOUBLY misrepresentative of the 1700s, but I think it was a springboard for people who wanted it to be true

interesting! im USAmerican and i literally cant tell the difference between british and australian accents so like, i REALLY have no context for this. i do remember ppl talking abt accents from back in my tma days, but all i can recall was just "people get classist towards people with Northern accents" and "the RP accent is the Posh Fuckhead accent" (and i could very easily be remembering those wrong, it's been a while)

i guess it makes sense that accents aren't always that neatly categorized. but because this is a topic i am INCREDIBLY ignorant about, i don't personally feel comfortable dismissing the "con's accent means he's poor" argument because you, an anonymous stranger on the internet, have told me that generalizing northern accents as working-class is patronizing and inaccurate, no offense

(i mean genuinely, please dont be offended by that, anon. like tbh when i write it out like that im like "yknow what anon, youre probably right" bc i feel like generalizing ANY aesthetic marker like that can get pretty dicey, but i would have to do more research on the cultural significance of UK accents before im ready to fully agree with your statement)

what i do feel comfortable saying is that the accents in ofmd are literally all over the place and for THAT reason the "izzy has a northern english accent so CANONICALLY he HAS to be working class" take seems like a pretty big reach, imo. if someones gonna choose to cling to con's accent specifically as proof of something in canon then i want to hear their explanations for ed and stede's kiwi's accents, for ed's british accents in the backstory, for doug's american accent. there are SOME instances in ofmd where character accents do have deeper implications, but it's mostly subtle, character-specific things, and i can easily see that those instances dont necessarily indicate that con o'neill's accent is one of them:

so disclaimer again that im VERY bad at telling UK accents apart (british accents especially), but im pretty sure the british characters who have dialogue and hold positions of power all have Rich Douchebag british accents?? (please correct me if im wrong lol). im talking abt the king, stede's two prisoners, and the badmintons, specifically. and it makes sense that they'd want to get the accents right for those guys, bc ofmd is VERY clear in making sure we know that The British Are The Enemy. giving them a stereotypical Rich Jerk accent just emphasizes that

(also the only reason im specific abt brits who have positions of power is bc i know there's at least 2 random british soldiers who have lines in e9, but i have no FUCKING idea what their accents are. if theyre ALSO douchebag richman accents, that further proves me point. if they DONT have posh fucker accents, that also kinda makes sense bc theyre like, cannon fodder to the british navy. theyre still bad racist ppl, but theyre dont hold power the way the other 5 characters i mentioned above are)

i might not be super informed abt all the details abt what accents signify in the UK, but i know enough abt history to know that ewen bremner going ham on the scottish accent in a show where the british are all portrayed as irredeemable colonizers is Based As Fuck. and this doesnt rlly apply to con/izzy bc con's accent is still english and izzy literally aligns w the british navy to achieve his goals, something that ofmd explicitly condemns

i know samba schutte personally chose to have roach's accent say something about the Roach Backstory he made up as part of the show's encouragement to have the actors for some of the side characters come up with backstories for their characters, but idk if all the actors chose to have their accents mean something. also, coming up with backstories obviously wasnt something that actors playing characters with more importance to the plot were asked to do. rhys, taika, and vico were given their characters' backstories. izzy is more important to the plot than roach (and wee john and fang, two other characters whose actors' have talked abt the backstories they came up with for their characters), and while we dont have a backstory for him yet, i wouldnt be surprised if con didn't get to come up with one. basically, samba deciding to have roach's accent mean something doesn't inherently mean izzy's accent means izzy is poor

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sukirichi · 2 years

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HEY SUKI! im the 💳 anon fidkgskaia i actually sent ask a few times after i asked you about the gojo fic but i forgot to out the card emoji at the end LMAO BUT i hope you're doing great!

I just read dusk til dawn and i am hurt????? its depressing dijdhakahbaakia. BUT BUT BUT I ABSOLUTELY LOVEEEEEEEE HOW YOU WROTE Y/N???? i love female lead like that bcs i am that kind of woman and our wrath after being hurt constantly is just 🙏😇 pray for yourself lmao or should i say suna and iris should pray harder? Fidkkahaka

NO BECAUSE I WANT TO BEAT THEM SO BAD?????? its so annoying how iris had the audacity to say the crown prince wants her to be pregnant to like miss????? thats my husband??? you're so stupid wtf 😂

but the fact that iris had an inkling about how y/n might know about their forbidden relationship and suna deny it just shows that suna is just equally stupid as her fkifksbaoaokab irisuna = stupid dumb ass couple 😍

you certainly made a great job on writing this story(and your other story too) because the anger and sadness i felt when i read is just... 💀

I LOVE KITA SO MUCH 😭 i hope we get to see y/n interact with kita soon. and the smut scene between suna and iris before the wedding is so hot 💔 it breaks my heart bcs its not y/n but still you make them look hot.

but iris is not a royalty.. right? i mean princess maiko said that she is just someone who grew up in the castle but she isnt a royalty. hmmm

i like y/n and oikawa's interaction in chapter 5!! makes me happy that she is enjoying her hunt with him!! and the last scene 💀💀💀 its too early for iris to be dead lmao y/n is just playing 😍 so true queen

and i cant wait to see what will suna say to her odudmahsiska and i hope y/n just strikes some mean words back at him or something bcs the chat on his phone with iris is disgusting 😭 poor y/n

BUT i remember he said that he would absolutely would fall for y/n if iris wasnt in the picture.... and the fact that he doesnt mind about spending his life with y/n gives me hope... BUT y/n's happiness are much more important!

ok this is getting too ling i shall stop. i cant wait for the next update hehehe love you suki.

- 💳

anon, hello!!

and aww thank you so much, i’m happy to hear you enjoy dtd and love the YN! tbh, when i first pictured how dtd would go, i always imagined her as someone who was loving and kind but eventually had to turn insensitive and maybe even cruel but like there will be moments where you can tell that she’s still a good person yknow?

oh iris didn’t say that suna wanted to get her pregnant 👀 she’s married to kiyoomi, and to make it seem like they had a happy marriage, she was lying about how she and kiyoomi are “trying” and they want to have a kid so bad but also she was provoking YN 😭

also WHOA i made iris and suna look hot??? that’s a compliment thank you! and YEAH i can’t wait for kita and yn interactions too, they’re gonna be my favorite non biological siblings duo here <33 and yeah, princess iris is not royalty nor did she come from a noble family. she’s an itachiyama citizen by birth but became a refugee in inarizaki when she was a little girl, so she grew up more with inarizaki’s culture and customs. her background will remain a mystery for now, but it’s safe to assume iris is the most odd one out of everyone in the royal family.

I LOVE OIKAWA AND YN INTERACTIONS. oikawa finds entertainment in people’s misery and somehow makes any situation enjoyable for him, with the exception of his marriage because he’s always in a sour mood around maiko. and i agree, sending a dick pic to iris was horrible like it even made me feel soooo uncomfortable and disgusted 💀

and yes, yes! suna does like the idea of spending a lifetime with us. he genuinely enjoys our company and like us as a person, and if only he hadn’t met iris first, he would’ve fallen head over heels for us. suna can be saying some mean things but we’re actually his type 😌

i love you too, anon, thank you so much for reading dtd and taking the time to send me your thoughts about it! i appreciate it a lot <33

#asks with naoya's trophy wife #series: dusk till dawn #anon:💳#long ask

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this-should-do · 2 years

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Heads up long slightly incoherant post about the walking dead lol so prepare to scroll if ya dont feel like reading

yknow, merle is prob one kf the best written characters/antagonists ive ever seen, like hes a racist disgusting horrible piece of shit, but fuck if he aint a character with layers, like when you first meet him in season 1 hes a flat character whos there to cause conflict by ykno being racist and skeevy, not a monster by any means but still not anyone ud wanna hang around with. the last time you see him, handcuffed on the roof, we see this brief moment of desperation begging for life before he turns on a dime cursing god and saying how hes never begged before before he saws off his own hand, and like you go from really disliking him to feeling bad for him and tbat i feel is the definition about how the viewers gonna feel about merle throught his time in the show.

we see him go back to more dislike for him as we learn more about merle through daryl and his relationship with merle. at tbe very least darlys perception when hes halucinating is a sort of backhanded encouragement and bullying that feels more cruel than a typical playful meanness syblings can have, so the viewer goes back to feeling more negativety towards merle than anything else.

Then you see him again in season 3. and he does drastically worse things than weve seen him do before all for the governor and that is the crux of his character development, which is rather plainly laid out for us by michonne right before merle tries to kill the governor. Throught out the season you see that loyalty, especially to your family, is a big thing for merle, something he shares with daryl, through his wanting to find daryl as soon as he finds out hes alive and then choosing to try to escape with his brother rather than kill him to stay alive like a character similar to merle mightve. but i feel loyalty to merle also is shown by how much hes willing to do for the governor after having been saved by him, hes willing to wait to find his brother when the governor says to, though of course this isnt without the beginnings of degredation of merles loyalty to the governor i feel.

you also see how merle views himself as a bad guy, a loner, and almost a tool i would say as well, at least part of it could have come from his upbringing and culture incomparison to others, but i feel a whole lot of it probably come from his feelings on what hes done for the governor, every human hes ever killed has been for the governor, so he forces himself to be the outsider, and you feel bad for him, you dont like him but you feel for him, hes take michonne becuase hes the shitty guy who does the dirty work for whoever hes loyal to, first its the governor and this time its for his brother, but as soon as hes faced with what hes doing and talked down by michonne he goes off to fucking kill the governor the fucking balls, and hes damn clever about it too, and finally right as hes about to die for the second time we see, it comes down to him not begging for his life, thats not what hes about and its even sadder becuase he just stands there, he knows hes been beat and you. feel. bad. its hurts. even tho uve never liked him hes been the bad guy hes brought glenn and maggie to the governor he tried to kill michonne he killed that kid. hes objecticely a shitty guy but you feel bad for him and his actions lead to the downfall of the governor, he did a good thing, and it doesnt erase his action the show doesn try to do that, hes not treated as "the rough guy with a heart of gold" becuase the show knows hes not that, hes selfish and only truly loyal to his brother.

his chadacter arc isnt unique, "shitty guy antagonist joins the protag team and self sacrifices to help defeat the bbeg" has been done before quite a few times in other medias ive seen, but merles treated alot more different than others. it feels like most times this character type is always "redeemed" for what they did, but merle really isnt. and i apprecitae that. i appreciate merles whole character and how it both cements him as a character you dislike maybe even hate, but also a character you feel bad for and almost admire some of his priciples if you stretch, but you arent forced to accept him as a good guy becuase he did one good thing. i dunno, ive just had sum thots about merle

#iwillspeakincessantly #when i first watched this show i celebrated when he died lol and only felt bad when darry was sad lol #but rewatching it now i feel way diff lol #prob me havign more developed crital thinking lol #anyways id say im sorry for the long post but im kinda not #this is my house lol but also kidna sorry lol

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self-h-rmageddon · 4 months

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i had a bad dream and it was a bad dream because it really wasnt that bad

it was about brian, he came back to me again and i. was mad but he owned up to his mistakes and he missed the attention i gave him and i missed giving it and i fucking went back to him and i felt butterflies and. i lingered too long, i wanted to stay

it makes me so SICK no matter how far i denounce him, it doesnt matter if i never think of him much, my brain cant let him go for some reason. why do you miss that? i was so miserable, i was being used. he ADMITTED that he didnt want me to be happy with anyone else and that he wouldnt try to make me happy at all so?

why do i still feel like i want him? its so hard to shake.. i do want him. i really dont, but i miss the attention, even if it was nothing at all. even if the closest thing i could get to any kind of affection was an "aw" when i was sad, i wouldve PUT UP WITH IT for him. i told him that, i told him i would deal with it if he could just.. sincerely apologize to me. for yknow. sexting a teenager!! but he didnt. he wouldnt. he said he couldnt apologize if he didnt mean it

my head still tries to make little fantasy scenarios with him, where everything turned out well and he could change and we could. what??? be happy together? yeah right. he didnt like you fat, didnt like you as a man and only entertained it longer cuz even if yr a man, you still have a cunt and thats what he wanted. annoying as fuck

i just wish i could let it go!!!!! why do i dream about him? and why are they good dreams? dreams that make me wake up with this sense of yearning, something i REALLY need to kill right away like. as fast as possible

im not going back to him i never ever will im . ive never been happier!!! when i left it felt like the end of the world and i was so depressed but ive NEVER FELT BETTER. i have people who actually love me now

and also??? he always pulled this shit talking about how i was a problem for him too, bitch?????? i was 16, you were talking to a 16 yr old with undiagnosed bpd of course im not gonna act RATIONALLY im fucking scared!!!! i was so scared!!! that first night when we met and like. 10 minutes after asking me how old i was it got sexual like IMMEDIATELY and it. felt nice but i was still scared. he doesnt even REMEMBER that conversation, but its burned into my brain. if you want a mature partner then maybe talk to an adult 🥳

i miss the attention, yes, but i dont miss how it made me feel. i dont miss the way it made my guts turn, made me shake. makes me shake just thinking about it. its the same reason i panic on fucking GRINDR, having people interested in me in that way is scary, it reminds me of him. i? i dont know.. its like whenever i get into sexual situations if its not approached gently i get SCARED, scared as if i was a kid again. it wasnt just him, after all. i wish i could just.. grow up? i wish that i didnt get so scared but i know its not my fault, i know that. whatever happened to me, i should have been PROTECTED. i shouldve been safe, but i wasnt

and it makes me so fucking angry? i never told anyone then because i knew that if i told my family, theyd blame me. and i LOVED him, i didnt want anything bad to happen to him, even if what he was doing was so horribly bad for me. i used to talk vaguely about him with my therapist and i started to frustrate her, thats why i dont go anymore. she would get frustrated because she didnt know what my problem is. I KNOW what my problem is, i just.. i was still talking to him, i was trying to approach it in a way that would protect him, even if he didnt deserve it

man. i hate being a tool for people, like genuinely. so tired of it.. yeah, tell me all about yr problems and ill be there to comfort you and listen. never ask about mine tho! never never never. you can ask me for nudes or pictures of my underwear, force me to roleplay with you even tho ive made it clear i dont really like it. ill do it to get you off! im so.

im glad i left. it was a good choice, he made me completely fucking miserable. very few times have i gone thru so much pain it literally forces me to dissociate from my body and view myself from above but! asking someone like that to apologize for uhh idk a crime? guess thats TOO FAR, tried sayin "erm well actually age of consent laws are higher in the us then a lot of countries ☝🤓" kill yourself!!!! like actually!!!!! im glad hes always miserable, i hope it never gets better for him ever

thats the worst part about it. is if it wasnt me, i would absolutely advocate for his death. because hes the kind of person i fucking despise, hes the absolute worst person to me. but i just.. i have a hard time extending that to him because he was awful to ME. he was mine and i used to love him!! i should hate him, and i do, i just wish it came as easy as hating any other predator

hated the way he acted when we argued tho, he tried gaslighting me before. you do not gaslight someone with bpd!!!!! cuz i fucking remember!! i read into everything anyone does extra of COURSE ill remember what happened. tried telling me i initiated it when i literally didnt cuz i knew better!!! i knew i shouldnt be talking to adults, but.. i did it anyways. that fucks me up a lot, it makes me blame myself. i knew i shouldnt, but the attention felt too nice, i didnt want to lose it and LOOK where it got me. permanently altered 🥳 nice job.

will NEVER let him blame me tho, cuz he started it. we separated like 4 times, and EACH TIME, he came back. am i that good? fuck if i know cuz it never felt like i was. probably missed getting his dick wet to our messages honestly. cuz when i was finally 18 he came back and immediately made it sexual again. im ashamed that i didnt stop him

i remember we argued because he thought i was irrational in thinking he would do bad things to me considering he literally told me before "so, consent doesnt matter between us, right?" ??????? im irrational for that?? do you even hear yrself? idk it just. pisses me off i hate him, i wish i could permanently kill the part of my brain that dreams of him fondly because it doesnt happen often but when it does it ruins my whole day

i just. i was too immature to be in a relationship with, but mature enough to be sexted every night? make it make sense!!!!! ik this is a lot, i just. need it off my chest so i can go back to normal. i wish it didnt affect me still but it does. i wish i could have fun!!!! wish i wasnt scared of getting sexual without randomly getting this intense sharp FEAR, fear that shoves me back and makes me run. i want to HEAL from this, i dont want to be like this anymore it fucking sucks. i feel like he ruined me. he'd roll his eyes at that

#this is kinda heavy #sorryyyyy #tw grooming #need it off my chest for now

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omohole · 6 months

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What do you think gay men are attracted to in men that they can’t be attracted to in women?

It can’t be anything about femininity or masculinity obviously. That’s both sexist, and cultural so can’t be what drives men-only attraction.

It can’t be anything about stated identity because someone could lie just as easily as they could tell the truth in such a statement, and it makes no sense because homosexuality and heterosexuality exists in other species with no stated identities. It’s not like other animals without gender are all pan.

Saying idk it’s the vibes or some indescribable trait men have that women can’t but “I can’t explain” is a nonanswer.

Soooooooo what is it? Or do you think any sexuality but bi/pan is just cultural performance or an identity rather than an inborn orientation?

- [ ]

this feels like bait but damn you sure are making a lot of assumptions about incredibly large groups of people with any number of unique experiences here.

"it cant be anything about feminity or masculinity"/"it cant be anything about stated identity" yes it can. because different people are going to have different reasons and explanations for why they are attracted to who they are. some people ARE attracted based on how feminine/masculine someone is. some people ARE attracted based on stated identity. by saying that it cant be these things youre making a huge generalization. just because You Personally do or dont experience these factors doesnt mean that its the same for every other individual.

youre absolutely right that attraction based on masculinity/feminity is culture based! so are many many other factors of romantic and sexual attraction (cultural expectations, societal opinions, views on monogamy vs polygamy, cultures where arranged marriages are standard, etc.) that might influence someones attraction to a potential partner. so i dont know why youre acknowledging that there is a cultural difference in some cases and then writing off any possible case of attraction to gender presentation (conformity or non-conformity) as impossible. not to mention that it isnt necessarily sexist to have those preferences at all. i for one, am a butch lesbian who is (primarily) attracted to other butches. that isnt me saying that a partner needs to act and perform in one particular way or another on the basis of discrimination, thats just me saying what i find attractive personally. just like i can say i prefer orange juice over apple juice. i dont think its Wrong to like apple juice, and i dont think people who do prefer to drink it are wrong or bad, i just dont like it personally. there have been subgroups in the queer community for literal decades that came together over attraction to very specific gender presentations (butches, femmes, twinks, bears, etc.). not to mention, when it comes to meeting a potential partner (at least in person) visual appearance tends to be one of- if not the first- things you notice about them. of course thats going to have some sort of influence on how you view them.

sure, people absolutely can lie about their stated identity. theres plenty of cases where people will attest that someone lied about their gender to get into their pants (and that sucks when it happens!). but that doesnt mean that its always true that someone will lie nor does it make it common to do so. fun fact, but if your partner is attracted to something that you Know You Arent, it tends to be a pretty unfulfilling relationship and lies like that are difficult to keep up.

and for some people, it literally is just Based On Vibes! some people do not have the words to describe what they find attractive, some people just know that theyre attracted to men and not women, and absolutely No One is obligated to explain it to a stranger (and much less an anonymous one). im putting in the time to type this all out because some of the things you said bothered me, but you dropping this on a random stranger is fuckin weird yknow?

the way you worded this last part is weird. no, i dont think that. its the same as any other attraction to one gender. do you think that being straight is just an identity or cultural performance? and if youre trying to say that it isnt the same on account of biological compatibility when it comes to having children, what about straight couples where one partner is trans? or straight couples where one is infertile? youre coming at this from the angle that being gay is the only form of single-gender attraction.

and alllll of that put aside to say that i dont know why you sent me this. im literally just a random person on the internet, i am not an expert in attraction in any manner. i can only speak as far as my own experiences and observations.

not to mention

i am not a gay man

#discourse #???#anon what exactly did i post that compelled you to send this to me #i am quite literally not the target audience of your question #i tried to word this the best i could #but i saw this Literally first thing in the morning and im a bit preoccupied studying for an exam i have later today #so apologies if its a bit scatterbrained or disorganized #if anyone else wants to contribute to this question feel free but like. dont expect me to continue talking about it #i am busy and discourse gets on my nerves real fast #long post #sorry i shouldve put that there to begin with. slipped my mind

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