#yes another ming fan post

[berriicherry]

They are ✨Sheemin'✨

#yes another ming fan post #digital artist #danmei #scumbag system #svsss #fanart #inconsistent art style #doodle #shen qingqiu #shen jiu #mf is my baby #uh #i just #i love him so much #berricherry

[zykamiliah]

what about bingqiu?

this is my response to this post. i didn't want to reply in the same post because it's going to get really long, and i disagree with almost everything, so this way i may avoid the discourse. haha. anyway, i'm gonna try to answer each of op's points.

-why bingqiu are a couple:

♦ because despite everything, they've chosen each other. not because they're soulmates (though mxtx did pull the string of fate thing), but because they genuinely want to spend time together

it's very subtle but they do share some values and similarities: they both repay kindness with kindness and believe that one should pay back those who hurt you twofold/tenfold. furthermore, they are both petty bitches. as @fireandgrimstone pointed out here, they're both busybodies: they get restless if they aren't doing something.

on that note: self-preservation is not a core value they share. sqq is terrible at self-preservation. from the first moment, instead of minding his own business, he risked losing points (which would terminate his account and kill him) just to protect binghe when he was being bullied by ming fan and co. sqq couldn't stand by watching someone being bullied. then during the demon invasion, he was ready to risk his own life to protect all the cqm disciples. he was willing to self-destruct to take out sha hualing.

the thing is that sqq likes to lie about himself and say everything he does is out of self-preservation, but it isn't true.

so, if it wasn't out of self preservation, why did sqq pushed binghe into the endless abyss? yes, it needed to happen, but he didn't do it to save himself. he can't hurt binghe just to protect himself. he did it because he brainwashed himself into believing this was the best for binghe, that binghe needed to in order to become strong and achieve his fate.

(chapter 4: conference)

♦ because they give each other what they need. consistent love, support and understanding was something lbh really needed, and those 2-3 years before the immortal alliance conference did wonders for binghe to allow himself to feel vulnerable and be more in touch with his own feelings. this will get screwed up post-endless abyss but sqq does encourage him in the extras to express his feelings and talk about what he thinks and feels.

now, what lbh gives to sqq may not seem obvious (thank you for the help, luuny!���), since sqq's layered narration is tricky to deconstruct, but by the end of the novel lbh can get past sqq's tsundere/savin face bullshit. sqq has all his toxic masculinity ideas and internalized homophobia that he keeps dragging everywhere he goes, and his relationship with lbh, who was supposed to be the epitome of masculinity, has allowed him to shed off some of it. but not all. thus, lbh knows when sqq needs to be pushed or coaxed into doing something he already wants to do but thinks he shouldn't want and doesn't know how to justify (sex for example). lbh also gives sqq the whole domestic package: someone to dote on, someone that does the chores and takes care of him, because frankly sqq is good at many things but he fails at self-care.

♦ domesticity and companionship. for bingqiu it wasn't like other couples who were first attracted to each other from one reason or another and from then on the relationship developed. the first period of their relationship is mostly platonic (poor binghe is suffering the teenage hormones), and was based on the easy domesticity and companionship they shared. and honestly that's such a simple yet beautiful kind of love. they genuinely like spending time together, living together, talking to each other. they never get bored of being together or of each other, which brings me to

♦ the obsession. like, it's honestly hilarious how obsessed they are with each other. sy was already obsessed with pidw protagonist bingge, but in svsss he got to love and get obsessed all over again with his own binghe aka bingmei. and from lbh's pov it's more or less the same: he had a complicated relationship with original sqq, which was the start of it all, but the person he loves is not the cold shizun from the past who he needs to prove himself to, but the one that's always trying to protect him, even if it's from himself. in both cases, their relationship started with distance, with the shadow of the other version of each other they'd known before. but what made them fall in love weren't those ghosts from the past, but the person they could see underneath it all: the hardworking boy that just wanted to be loved, and the closeted man who wants to give love and help others and have a purpose and belong to something (binghe understands that sqq would be unhappy if he couldn't visit cqm, qjp and his sect siblings). this relates to the fact that

♦ they understand each other better than anyone else. it takes them time, but that's the point of their journey and by the time we read about their relationship in the extras, we can see that despite everything, they not only understand each other very well but actively try to understand each other better. they already made the mistake of making too many assumptions, and they're not doing that again.

________________

another point that op got wrong:

off the top of my head an example would be how bingge (he-with-no-shen-yuan) took a harem of beauties so he could control xin mo but bingmei (he-with-shen-yuan) decided to just... cripple people's cultivation (...) what i'm getting at is that binghe was willing to pay other people's lives just so he didn't have to be intimate with anyone except shen yuan.

bingge too was cripping other cultivators to get ride of the excess of demonic qi, it's just that after he captured the three nuns from tianyi overlook they taught him how to achieve the same result using dual cultivation. (thanking @stardust-falling for their notes on this topic!)

(chapter 9: borderlands)

#svsss #zykamiliah-svsss #shen qingqiu #svsss meta #bingqiu #don't underestimate tianyi's sex ed!!! #canonically so good it fixed both bingge's cultivation issues and bingqiu's sex life lol

[thwispsings]

Hii! Maybe some Qing Jing trio(nyy, mf, lbh) shenanigans? Pre immortal conference and post SQQ-SY

“I feel like the two of you are judging me entirely too harshly,” Ming Fan says, trying and failing to untangle the knot of ribbons on his hands, Ning Shijie hums.

“That’s because we are.” Binghe says unabashedly, hissing when Ning Shijie pulls a little on the braid she’s doing on his hair, Ming Fan makes a face at him and Binghe sticks his tongue out at him and Ning Shijie pulls on his hair again “Ow, Shijie!”

“A-Luo stop being mean to da-shixiong,” She admonishes and Ming Fan smiles smugly at them before she turns to him “And da-shixiong stop provoking A-Luo, really.”

“But Shimei!” Ming Fan exclaims before quieting down at what must have been one of the glorious Ning Shijie glares “I don’t understand how the two of you have the ground to judge me on this.”

“Well, A-Luo is in love with Shizun” Ning Shijie says, tying off the braid and starting another one, Binghe nods.

“And Ning Shijie has a crush on Liu Shimei,” Binghe completes, passing Ning Shijie one of the wooden hairsticks “None of those is indicative of bad taste.”

“Oh, but i am?” Ming Fan questions hotly and their pointed silence must be more than enough of an answer because he starts muttering angrily about disrespectful shidimei and propriety.

“It’s not that da-shixiong is the issue!” Ning Shijie exclaims, trying to salvage their shixiong’s fragile ego.

“It’s da-shixiong’s taste in men that’s the problem,” Binghe says, nodding, Ning Shijie slaps his shoulder but he can hear her girlish giggle “I mean, a Bai Zhan peak disciple? Shizun must be getting hives at the mere implication of it.”

“Yu shidi is attractive! And he’s great with his sword!” Ming Fan argues, not noticing the innuendo until it’s too late, he goes red in the face while Binghe and Ning Shijie crumple into a heap, giggling loudly. “You’re absolutely horrible and i hate you both. ”

“Hey!” Ning Shijie says in this laughing tone, mirth in her eyes “More respect with your future Shimu!” 

Binghe colours at the mere implication but the look on Ming Fan’s face is so funny that it sends him into a laughing fit so strong his stomach cramps, Ning Shijie doesn’t seem to be faring better.

“You’re both awful shidimei and i want a refund.” Ming Fan explains, face fully red, Binghe hiccups.

“You’re stuck with us, da shixiong,” Ning Shijie says, poking at Ming Fan’s side with her foot “No refund for you, Yingying and Binghe are all you get.” 

“Yes, who would you commiserate about your embarrassing crush on Yu shidi with? Shizun?” Binghe asks and the look of abject horror on Ming Fan’s face immediately sends him and Ning Shijie into hysterics again, Ming Fan gets up on his knees and starts beating at them with the ball of knotted ribbons on his hand, cursing at them all the while.

The three of them are late for their duties, dishevelled and with grass stains on their clothes but the curve of a smile on Shizun’s beautiful eyes tells Binghe he doesn’t mind it at all.

#there are days when i find us (lingering in the sunshine throught the leaves) #i love them actually #even though thinking about them like this makes me sad #ming fan #ning yingying #luo binghe #bingqiu #if you squint #also #mingning #idk their ship name

[belovedstill]

bittersweet (ao3) svsss, bingqiu | 2.2k, canon divergence, angst and hurt & comfort if you squint, pre- and post-endless abyss, jinlan city (chapter 34)

“Binghe.” Shizun’s voice isn’t as soft or gentle as it usually is when he asks him random questions, so this one he’s trying to make sound casual. “Yes, Shizun?” “Does Binghe have a sweetheart yet?” “What does Shizun mean? What does ‘sweet heart’ refer to?” A glimmer flashes through Shizun’s eyes then and he straightens up a little more. Binghe knows this posture very well; with a heart feeling even sweeter, he sits up straighter himself, ready to listen to the teachings and learn.

written for @ficwip's hey, sweetheart event 💕 the rule was to have one character call another 'sweetheart' in a non-sarcastic way. wouldn't it be nice if Shen Qingqiu called Binghe this way? ...after years of pain, that is.

Full fic on ao3 & under the cut

The most dangerous thing that forever changes Luo Binghe’s thoughts happens on a morning like any other: special and warm, spent in the delicate sunlight while pouring Shizun his morning tea to be enjoyed with morning meal. Shizun has seemed somewhat absent-minded ever since he’s woken up, with his forehead creased ever so slightly. Luo Binghe has given him time and space to gather his thoughts and either keep them to himself or share them with him – after all, listening to Shizun’s musings is something Binghe is happy to do whenever his master pleases and it’s one of his favourite ways to spend their time together. Shizun doesn’t do it with Ming Fan or any of the other disciples—only with Luo Binghe. It’s quite a well-known fact at this point. Binghe likes to think it’s not just because he occupies the room in the bamboo house.

“Binghe.” Shizun’s voice isn’t as soft or gentle as it usually is when he asks him random questions, so this one he’s probably trying to make sound casual.

“Yes, Shizun?”

“Does Binghe have a sweetheart yet?”

Binghe blinks up at him as he puts away the tea kettle.

His heart flutters softly in his chest, as it always does whenever Shizun refers to him just by his given name. Whenever it does this, it does… feel… sweet. But Shizun surely doesn’t have that in mind, doesn’t he? Or does Shizun know… somehow…?

“What does Shizun mean? What does ‘sweet heart’ refer to?”

A glimmer flashes through Shizun’s eyes then and he straightens up a little more. Binghe knows this posture very well; with a heart feeling even sweeter, he sits up straighter himself, ready to listen to the teachings and learn.

“A sweetheart is a very important person. It’s somebody you love and cherish. Somebody you want to spend your life with, caring for and protecting. It’s somebody you want to make happy and be happy with.”

Yes, Binghe thinks immediately. Yes, I do have a sweetheart.

“Binghe is such a talented and dedicated young man, he’s at the age of finding his first sweetheart. This master was simply wondering if he has found her yet.”

And then Shizun opens his fan and looks at him over the edge of it.

There are some things Binghe doesn’t understand from Shizun’s speech. ‘First’ sweetheart? Binghe is not planning on having any other. ‘Her’? What’s with the pronoun? But he pushes that thought aside and gives him a firm nod.

“This Binghe has already found his sweetheart,” he says without a shade of doubt in his heart.

Shizun gives him a nod. With a gentle hand, he reaches for his teacup and takes a sip, hidden behind the fan.

“Good. In this case, this master has guidance to offer.”

“Yes, Shizun.”

“Binghe must take care of his sweetheart and always treat her with kindness and respect. He should show his feelings clearly and make time for her, pay his attention to her, even if affection settles into something lukewarm and guaranteed. He must not take her for granted.”

“…? Yes, Shizun.”

“Even more importantly,” Shizun says, his voice gaining a harder edge as he puts his cup on the table and closes his fan with a swoosh against his palm, “if Binghe doesn’t feel loved and appreciated by her, he must remember that he’s worth more than that. If she seems to love Binghe only for some parts of him and not the others, he must not sacrifice his own happiness for her and stay with her. If Binghe ever finds himself unhappy, he can leave.”

Binghe’s heart is thudding in his chest at the way Shizun is looking at him. The feeling in his heart turns into something warmer, hotter than a simple sweetness.

“Does Binghe understand?”

He tries, but there are holes in what Shizun is saying.

“Shizun, this disciple is too simple and unlearned to understand fully,” he says carefully. “If a sweetheart is a very important and loved person, why would anybody leave them?”

Shizun’s fingers tighten around his fan a little, but Binghe doesn’t miss it.

“Because sometimes those most important to us hurt us the worst. Sometimes, they don’t feel the same. And sometimes, they take advantage of our feelings for their own gain, and they are ready to abandon us whenever their fancy strikes.”

“Shizun.”

Who hurt you this way?

“Binghe will encounter during his life many beautiful maidens who will make his heart aflutter. They will be drawn to him, his skills, and kindness. They will offer Binghe warm words and warmer feelings. But words and feelings can be temporary. Every sweetness can turn into bitterness. This master does not want his disciple to be unhappy.”

Binghe puts his hands together and bows.

“This Binghe understands.”

When the charged moment seems to pass and Shizun has finished his morning meal, Binghe says,

“Shizun, this one has a question he is not sure he should ask.”

Shizun faces him with a calm expression. “Speak.”

Binghe lowers his head, then gingerly looks up through his eyelashes.

“Does Shizun… have a sweetheart?”

Hes fully prepared for the gentle pat of Shizun’s fan against his head.

“Shameless.” Spoken without heat or anger. And then, “This master is too old and busy to be chasing after maidens.”

Binghe smiles and offers him his most respectful bow. “This Binghe understands.”

Shizun enjoys speaking in riddles, and Binghe loves solving them.

No maidens. Too old. Too busy to chase.

But Binghe isn’t a maiden, and he doesn’t need to be chased. All he needs to do is wait some years and hope.

“Thanking Shizun for his teaching.”

Two years later, Shizun pushes him into the Abyss, and the sweetness in his heart trembles in worry.

A delicate paper fan falls together with him, its edges fraying from the heat and specks of molten sparks. For dozens of thick and dark hours, he holds it open in his hands, blinking back mist from his eyes as he stares and stares and stares at the face of the fan. No matter how much time has passed, though, the fan’s bamboo design, trembling in his swimming vision, does not change. And when it becomes clear that Shizun will not somehow send him a sign or instructions or an explanation, the sweetness in his heart starts tasting bitter.

Shizun was right. Of course, he was; all the wisdom he’s imparted which hasn’t brought Binghe hope has eventually turned out true.

And shouldn’t Binghe have expected this? Wasn’t that how it’s always been for him? If every sweetness can turn bitter, then it’s only certain that Binghe’s must do so in a way that hurts the most.

For what feels like days, Luo Binghe cradles the frayed fan to his just as frayed heart and decides to stay there. If he’s so unwanted, so despicable, he’ll just lie here and wait for the darkness to consume him.

But instead of darkness, in come the monsters. Shizun’s teachings have been nothing but thorough. On instinct, Luo Binghe evades each and every lunge, bite, and swipe of claws. He brings the monsters down with mere twigs and stones.

In all this ruckus, the edge of Shizun’s fan has got another small tear. Binghe carefully folds it and ties the fan with a piece of straw.

Shizun can’t have intended to have one of his favourite fans fall into the Abyss so Binghe should return it. Just so Shizun doesn’t feel the loss.

Of the fan.

For that, he’ll have to get out of this place.

He won’t even need to show himself to Shizun when he returns the fan.

…but if he does, would Shizun greet him…?

…maybe there’s been a misunderstanding. Maybe Binghe could explain…?

The bitterness stops spreading, kept back by the vulnerable flicker of hope. Within the bittersweetness of his heart, Luo Binghe finds himself a goal.

He has Shizun by the throat against the wall of an abandoned building. He’s chased him from street to street, rooftop to rooftop, after Shizun has started running the second he’s realised Luo Binghe is not Liu Qingge. Whom he’s apparently been expecting in his bedchamber.

What a fool he’s been.

Shizun hasn’t missed him at all. Shizun doesn’t regret pushing him down. Shizun hates him and hates him and hates him, and Luo Binghe—

“Binghe?”

—hates how his name sounds sweet only in Shizun’s voice. It’s the only voice he can hear, the only sound that reaches him through the murky, swirling fog in his mind. His frayed heart is pounding with hot blood, each pulse cracking it more and more open, each look into Shizun’s evading eyes scalding and sharp and confining.

“Am I really so undeserving of anything?” he grits through his teeth and pain and heartbreak. “Of warmth and closeness, and love?”

He can’t see Shizun’s face anymore, but he can feel the sudden light of his eyes on him. A piece of his heart trembles in a long-lost but never forgotten way, carrying with it a faraway scent of bamboo and fresh congee and sleep-warm inner robes.

“Binghe…”

Shen Qingqiu doesn’t care, flashes through his mind. He shakes the thought away, though he knows it’s right. The voice that speaks it has been the only company he’s had for so long and it’s never lied to him.

“—you hear me?” Shizun’s speaking in a softer tone now.

He just wants to leave.

Maybe he’ll listen now…?

He just wants to leave to Liu Qingge and Gongyi Xiao. He’s found others his heart is sweet for.

…maybe I could still be one of those—

For you, he feels only bitterness. If he claims otherwise, he’s lying.

…

“—need to calm your mind, focus on—"

He’s just afraid of your pain. He’ll leave if you show it to him. Make it so he can’t. Tear him apart as he’s done to you. Rip his chest open, see the hole where his heart should be. You’re not unworthy. You deserve everything. He has nothing worthy of giving.

A cool hand touches his cheek. It feels like relief.

He lets go of Shizun’s throat and clutches at his shoulders instead, pushing his face firmer against the cold, cold skin.

“Shizun—” Take his worthless breath away so he has none left to give anybody else— “—it hurts…!”

“Oh, sweetheart…” Shizun whispers, his voice nearly lost underneath the pain, pain, pain, but the word has touched his lips, Luo Binghe has never been more certain of anything in his life.

Shizun has called him—and before, all those years ago, he said that—

“A sweetheart is a very important person. It’s somebody you love and cherish. Somebody you want to spend your life with, caring for and protecting. It’s somebody you want to make happy and be happy with.”

—then does it mean—what does it mean?

Shizun lets go of his face and wraps his arms around his body, close and tight and open.

The chaos in Luo Binghe’s mind stutters.

“For all the pain I’ve caused you in the past,” Shizun says close to his ear, “let me repay it all today.”

The voice in his head crows.

Familiar cool, calming energy starts flowing fast into his spiritual veins. Shizun’s spiritual energy. The same Shizun’s who was poisoned by an uncurable poison when protecting him; the same Shizun’s who took Luo Binghe’s blows when they were trapped in his Dreamscape. His Shizun’s—protective, caring, ever self-sacrificing Shizun’s.

“N—no!”

The energy increases even more. The voice in his head spurs him on and cheers. He pushes against Shizun’s body, struggles like his life depends on it.

“Don’t—stop, I don’t need it, just stay! Just stay, don’t leave me, just stay, don’t leave—”

Shizun’s energy stutters to a stop then. A second later, his body sags against him and his arms fall down.

For a long, long moment, Luo Binghe stays like that, breathless, frozen in fear, eyes wide open yet unseeing. Shizun’s forehead is pressed against his neck. It’s cooler than it should be.

His mind is silent.

His heart is numb.

He can’t feel his arms.

And then—

Shizun sighs. Luo Binghe feels his eyelashes flutter against the skin of his neck.

“Of all the times to act up,” Shizun mutters.

His heart gives a tentative thump. Then another. And another.

Shizun’s hands brace against his chest, but before he can push himself away, Luo Binghe wraps his arms around him and pulls him close.

“Binghe—”

Luo Binghe shuts his eyes closed and says, “Begging Shizun to forgive. This Binghe asks for just a moment.”

Shizun sighs and goes slack in his arms again. “This master isn’t going anywhere. Binghe needn’t worry.”

How could he not? If Shizun wasn’t poisoned—

He shakes his head and stops that track of thought. The worst hasn't happened. Shizun is here and talking to him. Maybe—maybe everything can be fixed. Maybe all he has to do is start.

He’s never been more grateful for Without-A-Cure.

"Shizun," he whispers, not loosening his arms. "I believe Shizun's lost his fan."

Shizun's eyelashes tickle his neck. His breath feels warm.

"I've brought it to him," Binghe continues, "but it's a little damaged."

A moment passes in silence, and then Shizun's hands tighten on Luo Binghe's robes.

"I don't mind," Shizun breathes. "As long as it's back, all is well."

Luo Binghe presses his face against Shizun's hair and cries.

#svsss #svsss fic #bingqiu #more tags and potential warnings on ao3! #hey sweetheart #(i forgot the tag earlier. sorry!) #my writing #m #this one is a lil rougher than my usual fics but i have a soft spot for it anyway <3

[w2writesstuff]

What W2 Wrote in 2023

Considering that I'm prrrrrobably not going to manage to put out anything else this year, yeah, let's do a roundup now while I've got a moment. (Note: Only includes fun stuff; no professional shit here.)

January

I can't even remember January. Nothing happens in Januaries.

February

to the beat of your heart, ch. 3 (MDZS) The ongoing adventures of a self-indulgent happy-ending everybody-lives-and-also-bones WangXian canon-divergent AU; a joint project between my wife and me.

It’s Hard to Say “I Do” When You Don’t (@shousetsubangbang) Original story about a guy whose long-time crush asks him to pretend to be his boyfriend at a family wedding. Fake dating ensues.

March

Kintsukuroi (DMBJ) This heihua piece may be the best thing I've written all year? Look, I'm just very proud of how I made it exactly what I wanted it to be.

April

Head (@shousetsubangbang) This was a last-minute fill because the story I wanted to write failed to make itself writeable. Oh well! Still a funny and cute blowjob.

May

to the beat of your heart, ch. 4 (MDZS)

I want to be where all the stupid shit I say sounds so romantic and true (Guardian, WeiLan) Someday I will write a longer and more complicated series of Guardian sex pollen shenanigans, but until then, enjoy this one.

The Rightful Ruler (The Blood of Youth, Lei Wujie/Xiao Se) Still the only English-language story on AO3 for this pairing! Includes maybe the funniest line I wrote all year? You make the call!

The Doctor is In (Psych-Hunter) I know nobody watched Psych-Hunter, and with good reason, but I did, and I think Jiang Shuo should get to spy on the sexy gay doctor if he wants to.

June

A Single Explosion (DMBJ, Pangxi + Xiao Ge) For PingPang Week, with @pangzi in mind. Here's the missing part of Ultimate Note, where Pangzi takes care of Xiao Ge in the hospital.

Dog (The Disguiser, Ah Cheng/Ming Lou) This was actually written before I saw the post going around about how the sexiest thing one guy can be is another's dog. But it's true!

And I am green, and you are wood (DMBJ/Mystic Nine) Another exchange fic, where Liang Wan gets a chance to meet all of Zhang Rishan's old (boy)friends, especially Ba Ye.

Reverse Cowgirl (Not Gay as in Take Off Your Pants and Jacket, Queer as in Dude Ranch) (@shousetsubangbang) Is this the hottest thing I've ever written for SSBB? Might just be. Lesbian ranch hands recruit a city girl.

July

Stay (Beyond Evil, Oh Jihwa/Yu Jaeyi) Because you know what that show needed? Small town lesbians.

Little Spear (The Blood of Youth, Sikong Qianluo/Xiao Se) This show has some cute het, but how it would work in bed is another matter entirely; or, two gay people try to have straight sex.

动须相应 (live-action Hikaru no Go, Yu Liang/Shi Guang) It's hard to get much gayer than the actual show without adding explicit sex, so ... here you go! Post-series boyfriends.

One Quiet Night (Kingdom, Seobi + Lee Chang/Yeongshin) This is the other thing I'm really proud of, because it too came out pretty much exactly the way I envisioned it. A nurse, a prince, and a scrappy piece of shit more or less all fall in love.

August

Hooks in My Sides (Beyond Evil, JWDS) This certainly was the most popular thing I've written all year. It's unfortunately easy to write poor Juwon having a gay meltdown.

A World Made Up of Silver and Copper (@shousetsubangbang) A prince-and-pauper scenario, this time focusing on the prince's adventures in being mistaken for himself. (Hint: they are sexy.)

September

...Funny how the first months of each semester are usually a complete wash for me creatively, huh?

October

to the beat of your heart, ch. 5 (MDZS)

Over My Dead Body (@shousetsubangbang) Nothing like the romance of possessing a corpse only to find he's not actually dead. (Note to DMBJ fans: This should taste like heihua.)

November

A fair amount of November was spent writing something that I just couldn't finish for December's SSBB, once I realized how long it'd have to be and how little free time I had. Maybe next year!

December

Antivenin (@shousetsubangbang) A mean bisexual and an even meaner lesbian team up to distract their gay boss from his terrible crush.

-

And that's it! It always feels kind of weird to see it all gathered in one place, like ... wow, that's not nearly as much as I thought it was. But at the same time, it involves a couple of pieces I feel very good about, so overall I'm going to take the win.

The most fun I had was doing my Small Fandom Summer thing, where I wrote fic for fandoms that had <1000 English-language works on AO3. Maybe I'll do that again next year!

Anyway, if you do wind up reading something, especially the original stuff, thanks. A lot of this can be a very lonely process, especially when there's not much of a built-in audience. Saying you liked something makes me feel a little less like I'm screaming into the void.

Onward to 2024!

#s2b2 #i made this #original fiction #queer fiction #fanfic #queer

[wlwcatalogue]

Five Days of Yam-Pak Movies ～ Day 3: Lovesick // 為情顛倒 (dir. Chiang Wai-Kwong/蔣偉光, 1952) - starring Yam Kim Fai (任劍輝) and Pak Suet Sin (白雪仙)

Commentary below the cut!

Summary The daughter of a shipping tycoon, Yam Ming Fai (Yam Kim Fai) runs the family business in Hong Kong while pretending to be a man, but dreams of being able to marry her male subordinate. Unfortunately for her, she finds out that he is already dating someone, a small-time singer named Chan Ping Sin (Pak Suet Sin). What else is a girl to do but try to seduce her crush’s girlfriend, to force them to break up? (Many things, surely, but the multitude of other options do not occur to Ming Fai.) But while Ming Fai wins the battle, she loses the war, because although Ping Sin falls for her, her crush gets engaged to another woman instead. There is also a subplot about a working-class couple who want to get married despite their parents’ disapproval, which feels almost like a whole separate movie folded into this one.

Despite the inevitably conservative ending, it’s a fun watch, made funnier by how the movie seems to wink at the audience with regard to the queer elements. At the start, the script has Ming Fai assert both her heterosexuality and gender-conformity to a female friend, but in the film itself Yam is bursting with a cheeky charm not found in her other characters, who are generally rather staid and earnest. There’s also a heavy emphasis on the flirting with Pak’s character, and there are multiple instances of Ming Fai boasting to her male crush about winning Ping Sin’s affections – supposedly to make him jealous, but she seems far too gleeful for this to be the case. Ping Sin herself is also an interesting case; there’s a large contrast between her harsh, dismissive treatment of her boyfriend and her sweet attitude towards Ming Fai throughout, which subtly undermines the ending wherein she returns to the former. And it would be remiss not to add that yes, the character names are definitely riffing on the actors’ names – “Yam Ming Fai” and a lot of the other characters’ names are obvious enough, but even the “Chan” in “Chan Ping Sin” comes from Pak Suet Sin’s real name, Chan Suk Leung/陳淑良. Make of that what you will.

Note: Sadly, this is the only extant film wherein Yam plays a female character who is romantically linked with Pak’s character in some way; copies no longer seem to exist for the five other examples, namely Lucky Strike/福至心靈 (1951), Stage-Fans’ Sweetheart/戲迷情人 (1952), Two Naughty Girls/一對胭脂馬 (1952), Love Affairs of the Opera Master/伶王艷史 (1953), The Clumsy Lover/糊塗脂粉客 (1953).

Links:

My post about Yam Kim Fai and Pak Suet Sin being queer icons

Full movie on Bilibili

#hong kong #hong kong film #hong kong movies #hong kong cinema #yam kim fai #pak suet sin #yampak #yambak #pak sheut sin #bak sheut sin #my gifs #five days of yam-pak #lovesick 1952 #為情顛倒 #wlw recommendations

[alittlelessalone]

Last night I wrote some soft qijiu for my really long fanfic (progress is happening. I’ll get enough written to start posting eventually!). Because this scene isn’t until part 5, I figured it wouldn’t hurt to share it now.

Giving full context is way too long and complex, but here’s the basic gist. While he was still a disciple, Shang Qinghua ended up saving Shen Jiu from the Qui’s and caused a lot of ripple effects. Now years later, Shen Yuan has just arrived (in his own body) and expects the world to still be like in PIDW. He and Binghe recently went on a mission that didn’t go super well (think the skinner demon beginner mission) and Shen Qingqui had to come and bail them out. This takes place later that evening.

Anyway, here it is! A warning for some light references to past child abuse (Shen Jiu’s) and scars.

Shen Qingqui sank into the mass of soft pillows and blankets. He let out a moan as his tired muscles all but melted into his mattress. To his side, a warm lump shifted slightly to better accommodate his sprawl.

“Who said you could move? Get back over here.” Shen Qingqui rolled over to face his husband and gave him a pointed scowl.

Qi-ge only laughed and obeyed, rolling back in closer so Shen Qingqui could nuzzle up against him. Qi-ge draped a gentle arm across his shoulder, pulling him even closer and rubbing circles against his back.

“Long day?” His fingers pressed into a tight spot between Shen Qingqui’s shoulder blades and Shen Qingqui let out a deep moan. Qi-ge sighed contently at the sound and pecked a chaste kiss on the top of his head.

Shen Qingqui pressed his face against Qi-ge’s chest and breathed in his comforting warmth. “That child is going to be the death of me. How can he be so talented and smart, but also so absurdly stupid?” 

Qi-ge chuckled softly. “Ah yes. I heard Binghe and Shen Yuan ran into a little trouble today and that Ming Fan and Ning Yingying served as accomplices. There were apparently four rather contrite looking disciples kneeling in reflection in one of the meditation pavilions.”

Shen Qingqui sighed. “It’s always good seeing my disciples make new friends and Binghe seems particularly taken with young A-Yuan, but there’s a difference between showing off a little and being just plain dumb. Honestly, what was that child thinking today?”

Qi-ge let out another chuckle. “It sounds to me as though he simply wasn’t. But sometimes that’s just how children are. Not me of course, I was always a model of foresight and patience, but other, less rational and level headed children might behave that way from time to time.”

Shen Jiu pulled one of his arms from his comfortable embrace to reach around and smack Qi-ge none too lightly in the back of his head. It was probably a good thing for his husband that his fan was tucked safely away out of reach, but Qi-ge only laughed at the blow. He pressed another kiss to the top of Shen Qingqui’s head.

“Hopefully Binghe will reign himself in long before he reaches the levels of impetuous stupidity I did, but either way, I know you’ll be there to help steer him in the right path.”

“So long as he doesn’t send me to an early grave first,” Shen Qingqui groused. Qi-ge only kissed him again. “Naturally. But you know perfectly well that I’d never allow that.”

The pair lapsed back into a comfortable silence, filled only with the sounds of their slow and steady breaths. Beneath his head, Qi-ge’s chest rose and fell in a soothing rhythm. It was almost enough to lull Shen Qingqui to sleep, but his mind wasn’t ready to rest quite yet.

“Did you hear that Shen Yuan jumped between me and Binghe today?” 

Qi-ge stiffened slightly. “I didn’t. What brought that on?”

Shen Qingqui closed his eyes and recalled Shen Yuan’s terrified face. He had tried so hard to mask it under a veil of bravado and defiance, but Shen Qingqui had lived too much of his life surrounded by frightened eyes to recognize them as anything less. The Qui manor in all its opulent glory had no shortage of mirrors and he was intimately familiar with his own.

“He was afraid I was going to hurt Binghe. He saw me angry and approaching him and assumed the worst.”

Qi-ge let out a long sigh. “Unfortunately that’s not completely uncommon for children either. It’s always sad to see it manifest though.” His fingers continued to trace soft lines along Shen Qingqui’s back, running over the long-since scabbed over whip scars. “At least he’s now in one of the best places he could be to start healing now.”

Shen Qingqui smiled at the thought. “Cang Qiong Mountain really is very good for that. I never imagined I could even start the process, let alone end up where I am now.” He tilted his head up to press a kiss against Qi-ge’s jaw.

Qi-ge leaned down and gently caught his lips in his own. The kiss was soft and short, but Qi-ge waited for Shen Qingqui to pull him back in with more force. Their tongues brushed, sending shivers down Shen Qingqui’s spine. No matter how many years passed, the taste of his husband still left him feeling tingly and warm.

Eventually they pulled apart once more, although Qi-ge kept their foreheads pressed together. “I’m so proud and happy for you, Xiao Jui. There’s nothing more beautiful in the world than seeing you filled with joy. But I wasn’t actually talking about our sect when I said he was in a good place. Our sect as a whole is wonderful, but it has nothing on him finding you.”

Shen Qingqui’s cheeks grew warm and he buried his face against Qi-ge’s chest once more. “Moron.” He smacked Qi-ge again. “When did you become so disgustingly sentimental?”

Qi-ge gently stroked one of his burning cheeks. “Probably the moment I realized I had someone precious to me whose side I never wanted to leave.”

“Moron.” With his face still pressed against Qi-ge’s chest, he didn’t bother rolling his eyes. Besides, Qi-ge would never buy the annoyance anyway.

“I hope you’re right though. I was lucky enough to be surrounded by wonderful, kind-hearted morons who were willing to stand by me even at my worst. I just want them to have at least that.”

Qi-ge chuckled once more. “Well, as long as our friends and I are around, you should have no shortage of morons. But I’m sure your disciples can all feel your love. And I know they’re all safe now.”

Shen Qingqui closed his eyes once more and let the weight of the world drift away against his husband’s chest. “I really do have the best morons anyone could possibly hope for. Now what are you still doing up at this hour? Honestly. Go to sleep already.”

Qi-ge wrapped his arms a little tighter around Shen Qingqui and rested his head against his. “Of course, my love. Silly me.”

#qijiu #original shen qingqiu #yue qingyuan #scum villian self saving system #svsss #fanfic snippet #they are soft and in love #and have talked about things #Shen Qingqui has chosen to reclaim Xiao Jiu #I swear this fic will be published one day #once I fully finish parts 1 and 2 #until then enjoy the soft love!

[pandasmagorica]

Memory reach: Comrades: Almost A Love Story

OK, flying by the seat of my pants here, working on pure memory. I am one of those lucky people who knew what Jim was talking about when, in Moonlight Chicken, he told Wen about the movie Comrades: Almost a Love Story. I saw that movie many years ago here in San Francisco, either at a film festival or at one of the three theaters, alas, long gone, which used to show movies from Hong Kong. It's a great movie. I remember it in particular as the movie that showed me that Lai Ming (namesake of Li Ming in Moonlight Chicken) could act; before that, I had not been impressed by his acting abilities (although I'm not sure where I might have gotten that impression, as I can't seem to be able to figure out which of his earlier films I might have seen, so it may have been a false memory even at that time). But it really is a great movie and worth hunting down. Unfortunately, it doesn't seem to be available on any of my current streaming services.

(Edit: Worldcat lists Comrades' availability in various editions.)

So yes, having to go on a memory of a movie I probably saw about 25 years ago as well as the description on MDL. I've reconstructed my memory about it from two important real world events which happened during the course of the movie: the 1987 closure of the Hong Kong Stock Exchange for four days and the 1995 death of Teresa Teng. Please forgive me for errors of fact in describing the movie.

I also suggest reading @telomeke's post on the connection between Comrades: Almost A Love Story and Moonlight Chicken and @waitmyturtles' post on the same subject, as they will likely be much more coherent than my post which follows. Nevertheless, I am thinking about that movie, want to discuss it here, and will plunge forward with my two Hong Kong cents.

Basically, it's about a long time flirtation between two people who meet after emigrating from mainland China to Hong Kong around 1985 or 1986. Qiao, played by Maggie Cheung - who does a great job as well, and always has yes - knows Cantonese, the language of Hong Kong, and is a bit of a schemer. Jun, played by Lai Ming, is a bit simpler and speaks Mandarin. After Qiao's attempt to cheat Jun, they somehow wind up attracted to each other. However, Jun has a fiancé back in China and Qiao falls in with a mob boss, so although – if I recall correctly – they do have an affair, they never fully connect or wind up with each other. Not sure the exact sequence, but at some point in the film the 1987 stock exchange debacle happens and Qiao is wiped out financially. Possibly that is the trigger for her winding up with the mob boss. And Jun marries his fiancé. I think. Again, my memory of the film is hazy.

Full disclosure: Although I have long known and like the song which opens every Moonlight Chicken episode, I am not a Teresa Teng fan and don't recall that aspect of Comrades beyond: the one scene that I will mention in the forthcoming spoilers, and that the Cantonese title of the film is a title of one of her songs.

The theme of the film seems to be that even that if people might be right for each other, the time may not be right for them to be together. Jim echoes this explicitly in his dialogue with Wen in Moonlight Chicken.

Although the focus of this post is the movie and not the series, I do want to give a side prop to Khaotung for being willing to be caught on screen singing that song badly. This goes hand-in-hand with Ohm's destruction of If You Don't Love Her You're Crazy in that bar scene in He's Coming to Me, another Khun Aof series.

Before we get to the spoilers, another Maggie Cheung film I can recommend is Alan and Eric: Between Hello and Goodbye. Warning: it's a weepie. I've also seen her in Days of Being Wild and Behind the Yellow Line but I don't find it either of those films particularly memorable.

Spoilers follow

Back to the movie:

Flash forward 10 years. Both of them wind up in New York City, both now single, still separate and unaware that the other is not far away. Qiao is picked up by immigration authories but escapes. She winds up in front of an appliance store with a window full of televisions. A news story is playing about the death of Teresa Teng. She turns, and also watching the story is Jun. They recognize each other and smile. End of scene.

The film then flashes back to one of them arriving in Hong Kong on the train from China. They get off the train in one direction. The camera pulls back and we see the other one get off the train in the other direction.

So the film is kind of a variation on the idea of people who are destined to meet. In this case they meet very quickly, but just can't manage to be together because the timing is wrong. We don't even know whether they get together this time because the film has cut away. We hope they'll succeed this time, but technically it's an open ending.

It is truly a beautiful film and I recommend tracking it down and watching it if you can.

While there are some parallels between Comrades and Moonlight Chicken, an open ending is not one of them. Please don't let the potentially ambiguous ending stop you from watching Comrades.

#Moonlight Chicken #Comrades: Almost a Love Story #Hong Kong films #ql series #ql drama #thai ql #cantonese film

[fourseasonsfigs]

Minguo Military Husbands

Here we have Zhang Zhehan as Ming Xia from Demon Girl and Gong Jun as Fang Yan from Shining Like You. This is technically my fourth Fang Yan fig (yes, I'm as surprised by this as you are!), but this is our very first time with Ming Xia.

Full disclosure, I have not watched Demon Girl yet, as I have bumped my very slow plod through Legend of Yunxi for The Blooms at Ruyi Pavilion, of which I have gotten through exactly none of yet. [In further full disclosure and to make excuses on my own behalf, I must say that I watched Gong Jun sing with He Laoshi on New Year's Eve and was so impressed and inspired. I thought, you know what, if Junjun can learn how to sing, I can learn Chinese. So just like Junjun, I'm getting better with practice, but the daily studying does cut down on the TV time.]

So all that being said, I know the basics of Demon Girl. First, that Ming Xia is the police chief of a small town set in the Chinese Republican era (think 1920s-1930s), and second, that Zhang Zhehan in Minguo period costume is (like Zhang Zhehan in any costume at all) very, very pretty. Here's some of the inspiration for this fig:

Gorgeous, isn't it? I'm a big fan of the guzhuang (ancient style costumes like Word of Honor) costumes but these are just beautiful. The pin waves in the hair! Love it.

Fang Yan, if you recall from this post, is an arts school college student. Shining Like You is memorable not only for the dance number highlighted in that post, but also the delightful zebra costume dance number you can see here and here. Continuing to draw from the evident gold mine that is Fang Yan's college acting oeuvre, we have him in this screen test:

This is from episode 22, which is incidentally also about how old Gong Jun looks in this show. The screen test in the show is super cute because as you can tell, he's doing Serious Acting Business facing the camera, and then as soon as they stop filming he's all happy and smiley as in pic 3 there.

No, I haven't watched this show either, I'm sure there's an episode where he's brandishing a gun sideways rather exactly like this, but I'll have to get to it at some point.

Both of these figs have completely detachable hats. There's no slot or divot where the hats fit - you just drop them on top of the fig's head and arrange how you like.

I couldn't get Fang Yan's hat to stay on his head while I moved him around, so I used a large chunk of Museum Putty to get it to stay. I'll do a picture roll here of him without his hat:

And then another with the hat...

I really like the motion in his jacket and, naturally, his expression. You know I'm an absolute sucker for that sideways smirk!

Oooh Ming Xia looks great in that uniform! I love all the beautiful gold detailing, especially on the sleeves and collar.

When Ming Xia is done menacing his hat there, we have something else very special to show you - his cape!

His cape was a separate add on you could purchase if you wanted to. Of course, I wanted to. What a cool cape! For $2.54, a bargain. If Ming Xia didn't want it (he does), some other fig no doubt would. I upped the exposure quite a bit on the cape in an attempt to show you the details - it's actually a beautiful true black.

Here he is in all his glory! I put him on a fig stand to get a little bit of extra clearance for his cape.

He's SO CUTE.

Yeesh, I'm just about at the pic limit, so let's get a final shot of them both for you:

And the box cards, of course!

I love them! I'll take more Ming Xia figures by the bucketload, please and thank you!

Material: PVC for the figs, plastic for the hats, and cotton (maybe a liiiiitle bit of poly blend in there) for the cape

Fig Count: 212

Scene Count: 18

Rating: Why rather dashing, if I may say!

[link back to Master Fig Index for more posts]

#jzeu #junzhe #zhang zhehan #gong jun #shl cast #word of honor cast #figthusiast #shining like you #demon girl #why yes I bought an app just to age the header and I regret nothing #nothing I tell you NOTHING #totally worth the 99 cents #oh boy are you gonna see this app again #it's so much fun #I love it so much #I can't believe I have four Fang Yan figs #FOUR Fang Yan figs can you believe it #two of them are zebras

[sketching-shark]

i think what the other aon was referring to wrt to jttw being "nonpro buddhist" may be related to how some people during the ming dynasty took issue with how jttw brought attention to flaws in both buddhism and daoism (with lots of antagonists being the escaped pets/steeds of gods, buddhas, bodhisattvas, etc alike). i think earlof221b had a reallly old post about this

Oooooohhhh okay that makes a lot of sense. And yes I should have mentioned earlier that the satirical side of JTTW in regards to deities is definitely an important part of the story! As is you do have Chinese retellings of Xiyouji that really lean into that, with 1964's Uproar in Heaven standing as a particularly prominent example.

Looking back on it I do wonder if I've developed something of a reluctance to talk about that part of Xiyouji given the extent to which I've seen some other western fans of JTTW and JTTW-adjacent works say some pretty insulting things about important Chinese deities, but it feels like there should be a way to talk about the satire without going full "I love insulting another culture's religious figures" mode. If anyone has recommendations on how that might be done or articles that do so, feel free to say so!

#anon answered #journey to the west #jttw #xiyouji

[unactivecookie]

If I were to write a Animal AU these would be the animals I’d assign the characters too

P.S: SQH and SQQ are being assigned based off the OGs because yes

I also did this purely for fun

Edit: Also in this AU if you ever watched Brand new animal the genetics would of work similar to that… great, that makes me wanna turn this into a BNA crossover instead- god dammit. First Kung fu panda and now BNA.

I was doing so good

Peak lords:

Yue Qingyuan: Siberian husky

sometimes in fics YQY reminds me of a dog sometimes with shen qingqiu being his owner.

Shen Qingqiu: Siamese Cat

Since YQY gets to be a dog, SQQ gets to be a cat.

I searched up on google on breeds with ‘angry’ temperament and the Siamese popped up. This is also a reference on a fic I read describing SQQ like a cat aswell

Wei Qingwei: monkey

or a gorilla since he’s a black smith.

Like SQQ, I searched animals with ‘goofy personality’ and money came up

Shang Qinghua: Red fox

We’re going off Whats commonly head cannoned for OG!SQH and that’s being a sly, clever asshole, and Foxes can stand for mischievous and cleverness

But we all know if it was Airplane!SQH it’ll be a Hamster for sure

This is also another reference to some art I saw on Twitter by sel

https://twitter.com/selwujun/status/1495433448261320704?s=21

Qi Qingqi: Tiger

According to this website (https://boompositive.com/blogs/positivethesaurus/symbols-of-beauty) tigers stand for protection, passion, nobility, power, authority.

Mu qingfang: bat

Liu qingge: wolf

Another symbol, this being a symbol loyalty, guardianship, independence and freedom

——-——————•———————————-•——

Disciples:

Lou binghe: sheep

I have no actual explaination for this other than the term ‘white sheep’

Ming fan: Dove

I wasn’t able to think of something for this pure boy so I went with a dove because I can since this is my POST

Ning Yingying: rabbit

SAME THING WITH MING FAN

It’s hard to find a animal for disciples so it’s fair game to say they’re all going to be random

Same thing might apply to other characters if I do a part two with other characters later

Liu mingyan: Wolf

Since liu qingge is a wolf and she’s related to him

Yang Yixuan: coyote

You know the answer

——-——————•———————————-•——

Our favorite demon generals

Mobei-Jun: Snow leopard

This is actually going to be a reference towards a piece of art I saw a while back

https://twitter.com/kurotsukiyami/status/1488344558261915648?s=21

Sha hualing: Crow

Because I said so, I may Change this in the later future though

——-——————•———————————-•——

Now I haven’t decided if I’m gonna do just animal traits or humanoid animals (like Kung fu panda) but I might just do traits to save my brain

In part two if I bother doing it, I’ll include characters like Linguang-jun or Su xiyan

#svsss #svsss fanfic #peak lords #svsss au #BNA #kung fu panda #animal AU #animal Traits

[neonghostcat]

SVSSS WIP Ramblings

I probably should have updated my fanfic blog more recently than, "Day one of starting a fic that I'm going to post the final chapter of in less than a week from now." 😅

Obviously I am not a professional blogger here.

Below the cut I'm going to chat to myself (a lot) about my upcoming SVSSS fanfics. If you have thoughts, please feel free to hit me up about them!

SO.

I'm just about to finish posting "The Treat Route". I've been very pleased with it and am excited for reader reaction to the finale chapter. 💌

***

I already completed "Salted Caramel" -- the third in the trilogy -- and I feel oddly nervous about it.

It was written with the idea of being pure Gen with enough of the background LiuShen to qualify still as being marked M/M. (I did not achieve that second part, which is why I wrote "The Treat Route".)

But because the response to the dynamic between Binghe and Ming Fan was so positive/intrigued in "Hallow Evening" I threw in a lot of fanservice in that direction along with the, "Binghe makes friends and buries the hatchet with Ming Fan."

As I sit here right now, all I can think is that I kind of want to push it from "you can see it as a ship if you want, or ignore it if you don't" to "yeah, this would definitely be pre-ship Binghe/Ming Fan or even Binghe/Ming Fan/Ning YingYing".

There are 14 works tagged Luò Bīnghé/Míng Fān on AO3 currently. The tag for Luò Bīnghé/Míng Fān/Níng Yīngyīng exists, but with 0 works (which is odd as I was sure I'd seen some before?)

Safe to say, it's not a popular ship either way you slice it. And possibly could put a lot of people off of reading, which is why it was going to be a, "See it or ignore it - all good by me." And I do get that because bully/target is uncomfy shipping territory and how many people can say that Ming Fan is one of their favorite characters anyway? It wasn't a thing I'd even considered myself before people in the comments made me go, "You know, with my set-up, I'm kinda into it?"

Ah...!

I'll figure out if I want to leave it open to interpretation or make it more into a thing. Either way I go, it's going to have fewer readers than any of my other SVSSS fics and I'm at peace with that. It's a good story and I'm happy to share it and catch everyone else on the next fic if it's not for them.

(It doesn't help that it's a bit more angsty than my other offerings too and I'm a bit nervous about that part considering how many people have told me they like my stories as comfort reads. It's got lots of fluff too, just I'm a worry wart by nature so all I can do is tag and fret.)

***

I'm supposed to be using this time to work on Cultivate.

I am not using this time to work on Cultivate. (Yet.)

I'm not exactly stalled on it, but I want to WRITE while I can (summer often gets quite busy with work and I get tired) and right now I'm in the part of the story where I have to go back and make sure I'm keeping track of all the loose threads so I don't forget any.

Still super excited for this one, though. I'm not going to say it's my "best" so far, but it's the one I go the furthest from canon and playing with all the elements (more humor, mystery, more domestic LiuShen, survival/Stardew Valley vibes; etc) is truly delightful.

***

As you may have picked up from the previous bit... Yes, I'm currently writing another SVSSS/LiuShen fic.

In my defense, it was meant to be a oneshot. I saw a fun prompt on AO3 for a 4 seasons - 4 kisses story (I've been wanting to write a four seasons - one location story for awhile now - it's been on my "I have notes for this" pile for a couple of months) I immediately was like, "I can scratch the itch to write without committing to another small/midsized fic when I'm meant to be writing a longfic!"

Chapter one got away from me and so now I've confined it to one season/kiss per chapter. It's Under Control!

First two chapters are done, third chapter is plotted and may be done tonight, and from there I'll have a good idea how I want to end it. (I'm about 60% sure at this point where it's going.) Chapters are roughly 3.5k each, so it should end up around 14k-20k. As long as work doesn't explode earlier than expected, I should have it finished by Thursday.

I'm going with a more 'enemies-to-lovers' dynamic with LiuShen this time, so it's not quite as fluffy. (I always say that and then end up with fluff.) But when people see the tags I feel like it's going to get side-eyes like, "NGC - what are you doing?" (It's fine, it's fine! Trust the T rating!)

It has an entire chapter set during Sha Hualing's Demon Raid! (I think it's a fun chapter.)

***

Thursday's update on The Treat Route is probably going to have a poll about which story I should post next.

I don't know if people would rather have a buffer between The Treat Route and Salted Caramel or if they want to complete the set and then move on.

Either way is fine by me. And that gives me ~11 weeks of posts. Which could maybe-possibly-who-knows-with-me give me enough of a buffer to finish Cultivate and even maybe finish that Sherlock story I've had as a WIP since late 2020/early 2021.

#fanfic planning #svsss #story: hundred winters grove #story: salted caramel

[abraxos-the-phantom]

Scum Disciple Deleted

-scenes. Here you go @vodkassassin. Unformatted and mostly unedited save for some awkward phrasing I fixed as I skimmed through it. I have a habit of merely taking out scenes rather than straight deleting them when I don't think they work out so if you see it on the fic shhh I probably just found a better place for it, but for the most part I think these are unused

TLJ + MF; Flashback/Illusion

[Log: File:Save_??-???.?.????.log]

“You know, for a man so keen on maintaining the preference of a dignified cultivator, you are fairly quick to disband such things as you see fit,” Tianlang-jun mused.

Ming Fan threw a dirty look to the former Overlord of the Demonic Realm over his bowl of beef stir fry lily bulbs. It was a specialty in this region, boasting a sweet lily bulb due to the length of time the farmers around the area spent cultivating the plant. In other words, it was delicious and a welcome change to the guilt trip galore that was eating Lou Binghe’s cooking.

Oh to eat that delicious snow congee without feeling the compulsion to throw it all back up-

Well, no use dwelling on such things.

“Most of anything could be considered vulgar when in close proximity to you,” Ming Fan quipped, taking a generous helping of the stir-fry between his chopsticks. “If you had as much sensibility as you had sensuality, I guarantee that people would be more fond of you. Unfortunately, it is too late for me.”

“Hoh? Is that so?” Tianlang-jun’s lips curled in a smirk in spite of the fact that Ming Fan had no interest looking his way, regardless of the other demon happened to do. Some odd five or so years have taught Ming Fan that there were times when the best move for dealing with the other was simply ignoring him.

Ming Fan maintained his bland tone as he briefly paused to speak, “Yes.”

Tianlang-jun shook his head, “Honestly. Are all disciples of Cang Qiong like you, or are you just the special one.”

Said disciple only gave Tianlang-jun a significant dirty look, “You’d have to actually behave yourself to get to know another disciple of Cang Qiong.”

“Eh,” the Heavenly Demon leaned back against his chair with his hands crossed behind his head. “Too boring.”

Ming Fan made a noncommitting sound as he finally ate the last of his order, letting out a satisfied sigh as he leaned back in his seat.

“Ming Fan, a question if you are so gracious enough to grant me such a thing.”

Ming Fan only raised a brow, “You may ask, whether I answer is not on the table.”

“Why?” Tianlang-jun paused as he attempted to think about his question. “Why do you maintain this relationship of ours? It’s not as if you’re on any obligation to maintain basic relations for a political reason, and you hardly ask me anything so you aren’t after my wisdom. With Lou Binghe going in and out Cang Qiong Sect, it’s not as if I can threaten your Sect any more than I could try and fight with my son.”

Ming Fan crossed his arms, humming for a moment tilting his head just enough to convey thoughtfulness he turned to look the demon lord in the eye, “If you were to be confronted with a former enemy of a war without meaning, what would you do?”

Tianlang-jun hummed, “I wouldn’t care.”

“Exactly,” Ming Fan pointed out. “Now what would you do if you discovered you were on the wrong side of that war?”

“…I still wouldn’t care.”

“Would you?” Ming Fan hummed, “Well, that’s your choice.”

“So is that all? You pity me?”

“Not quite,” Ming Fan shrugged, idly arranging the finish plate on the table. “More like my recompense of sorts.”

Tianlang-jun’s expression was unreadable as he stared, quietly adding, “You realize that I’ve killed hundreds of cultivators like you. Your age, younger- older. It didn’t matter, they were obstacles in my path and I removed them.”

“Of that I do not doubt, but these days- the line between righteous and mad is thin,” Ming Fan snorted. “I stand at the meager in-between myself. But what else can I do? I am but a mere mortal, attempting to right his wrongs.”

Ming Fan took a final sip at his tea, “Sometimes, that is all one can do without going well and truly mad.”

Tianlang-jun chuckled, “I suppose that’s true.”

The hours seemed endless after that, a moment in time felt like hundreds upon billions as the two simply- existed.

“So,” Tianlang-jun said after an eternity’s moment. “What are you doing here Little Cultivator?”

Ming Fan blinked, “Is this not one amongst our many meetings?”

The world seem to blur around him like ink amongst a pool of water. Fading into implied images as the sky and trees distorted. The sounds of the earth quieted to a hushed whisper. Ming Fan’s eyes casted around in confusion as the lively village dulled into a dead silence.

“It isn’t,” Tianlang-jun leaned back, smirking. “You’ve spent so long with me that I am now here with you- in limbo. I’m flattered Fan-er.”

Ming Fan narrowed his eyes, scowling, before looking away, “Definitely. Tianlang-jun never called me that to my face.”

Ming Fan twisted away from the…demon for some time to think.

TLJ + MF - Actual Flashback

“You look like you went a round and three more with a golem,” Tianlang-jun tsked at him.

“Are you going to lecture me about coming out while I look like I lost against said golem or are you going to sit your ass down and have some tea like we agreed?” Ming Fan snapped, wincing as he sat.

Tianlang-jun whistled wolfishly. “Why, I never took that War God to be the kinky type.”

“Don’t be so obscene,” Ming Fan rolled his eyes. “He landed me flat on my ass almost a dozen times. Of course sitting down would be a pain.”

“You know there’s this flower that-“

“No.”

“But I hurt just looking at you,” Tianlang-jun whined like a particularly annoying brat. “One tiny little adventure to look for a flower that heals bruises instantly, it’s a Lotus of a blue hue, I hear those people from the far West have been using it for some time.”

“And then Liu Qingge will have me spar against him, again, and this hellish circle will repeat itself. I am only saved by the fact that my cultivation is not as advanced as one of a Peak Lords, otherwise I would be healed by the end of the week and my pain begins anew,” Ming Fan shook his head. “I appreciate your concern, I really do, but no.”

“Aww, well since you’re being so polite about it…” Tianlang-jun sighed and sipped from the tea. “Mn- this is good. Where did you get it?”

“Shang-shishu taught me how to prepare lemon tea before the fruits go out of season, apparently there is a sweetened-cold version of this as well, but he has yet to refine the technicalities of the ingredients. I worry for him, he always seems so busy.”

“He looks like a rodent who accidentally ate a pepper, though I suppose in this case it would be a block of ice what with Mobei-jun being his lover and all.”

“I did wonder how that happened, and worried a brief time. An Ding Peak’s disciples had said that their master would occasionally come home bruised and barely able to walk, they were rearing to go to war with the Northern Demons far before everything else happened.” Ming Fan sighed, “Well, it isn’t any of my business. I’m sure they’re dealing with the situation in their own way.”

“True that, those An Ding Peak children…physically they are weak, but it is always the weaker ones that surprise you the most. Especially when angry,” Tianlang-jun smiled as he mused. “Afterall, hornets don’t seem like much at first glance. That Mobei-jun has his work cut out for him, ah, speaking of. What of those two? Surely the boy is tip-toeing these days.”

“He tends to keep to the bamboo house, and we tend to stay far away from the bamboo house, especially at night.” Ming Fan raised his hand to drink. “That is all I will say of the matter.”

Ming Fan sighed, rubbing a hand against his eyes, “I am getting far too old for this.”

“Oh please, you’re not even a century old.”

“Hm, and yet somehow I am still significantly more mature than you. Have you reached the regression stage of life Tianlang-jun? I must say, I’m rather peeved that it’s a mental deterioration rather than a physical one for you demons.”

“Hoh?” Tianlang-jun leaned forward, smirking. “Wish to test how youthful I can be Little Cultivator?”

Ming Fan raised a hand idly pointing at the silks of Tianlang-jun’s clothes, startling the heavenly demon as he wondered just what the other had found on his clothes.

Then Ming Fan flicked up, hitting the former Demon Lord up the lip and under the nose, causing Tianlang-jun to recoil, sputtering from the unjust attack. The audacity.

“I’m sure you’d at least warm the bed,” He deadpanned, sipping at his tea without a care as Tianlang-jun sputtered indignantly.

NMJ/MF - Original Re-meeting for ch 52; added here for my convenience (cus i don't wanna make another post)

“Gather everyone who can fight!” One voice called. “Sect Leader Nie is being surrounded by a pack of hell hounds! They need help.”

Ming Fan was out and running before anyone could even blink- with only Liu Qingge and Tianlang-jun holding enough time to react by following him.

-

“Shit-“ Mingjue cursed, swinging around Bàxià to hurl one attacking hound over to the side. “Meng Yao- you alright?!”

“Could use-” Meng Yao grimaced as he had to back off to avoid the snapping jaws of another hound. “Some help.”

“Reinforcements should be on the way!” Mei Lin cursed venomously under her breath. “Just where the hell did all these damned dogs come from?!”

“We’re being overrun!” Lang Fengyi yelped as he narrowly avoided claws.

“Fuck-“ Mingjue gathered his energy, willing it to fill him once more. “Get ready to run! I should be able to distract them long enough to-“

“Don’t worry about that.”

The disciples of Nie turned to find a man arrogantly walking through the field, the hounds yipping in fear and running from him, as well as another man clad in white and silver who eyed the hounds back.

Tianlang-jun stood before the disciples of Qinghe Nie with a bright smile, “Relax now, everything will be fine.”

Liu Qingge huffed, drawing his sword, “Says you. We have to make sure he’s not overworking himself remember?”

There was a distant rumbling- an ominous presence that washed over them to the point where all the hounds began to shudder and shake in fear as they too yipped around fearfully.

Descend with great speed. Swift and merciless. Run my enemies. Leave none left alive. May death greet you well.

Formation formed.

Ming Fan dropped his sword with militaristic precision, tilting all the swords generated by his power towards the ground in varying angles.

Heavenly Wrath Formation.

Tianlang-jun looked up in the surprise, “Don’t tell me that’s-“

“It is,” Liu Qingge scowled.

“Who-“ Nie Mingjue began- before all hell broke loose.

Liu Qingge’s expression was thunderous as he swept past rows of demonic hounds, tilting on hand and waiting-

Another man dropped from the sky not a second later, catching Liu Qingge’s robes and righting him before swinging his legs on the man’s waist to get around and jab another hound in the back- Tianlang-jun was swift to join the fray, allowing the shorter cultivator to move around him to get at all the lucky hounds who managed to move away from Ming Fan’s deadly aim fast enough.

While Tianlang-jun added to the deadly partnership with his own flare, it was the pair of Ming Fan and Liu Qingge that showed the obvious years of partnership between them- for the two had years of spars and night hunts to guide their blades where they need be.

Heads flew, limbs joining them as the immortals of Cang Qiong Sect and Tianlang-jun of the Heavenly Demon Line slaughtered the feared and the rowdy- leaving those of Qinghe Nie in awe.

“..Wei…” Meng Yao said, knees beginning to grow weak. “Wei Fan?!”

The man abruptly froze, glancing towards their direction before seeming to move on instinct- the War God sensing the sudden change and using his arm to propel him outward, allowing the man to fly across the air and land his sword true through the skull of the hell hound that was just about to take a chunk from Nie Mingjue’s side.

Ming Fan, not upset as he was, barked at them venomously, “Just what do you think you’re doing?! Fucking move! You’re in a battle field! Fight damn you! Are you not of Qinghe Nie?!”

“Teacher Wei!” Mei Lin cried- openly actually, crying.

“Oh for the love of-“ Ming Fan cursed. “I’ll take your crying and yelling and cursing later, lift your sabres and fight!”

“Xiao-Fan!”

Ming Fan turned, grunting as he launched his sword in the Heavenly Demon’s direction and skewering the hound. “What?!”

“Lower your blood pressure!”

Ming Fan felt his blood pressure rise out of sheer spite. “Fuck you!”

“A-Fan,” Liu Qingge growled. “You just performed one of the most powerful formations while silent. Calm down.”

“I can’t!” Ming Fan caught himself with a scowl. “But I’m not upset!”

“For the love of-“ Liu Qingge turned to Tianlang-jun. “Can you handle the rest?”

“Yeah I got it,” Tianlang-jun batted away a hound with his bare fist. “Just take care of our pissed off little horse first.”

Liu Qingge wasted no time, grabbing the now fuming Ming Fan, his nose beginning to trickle with a line of blood and generally causing the already shocked disciples of Qinghe Nie to panic.

“Hey,” Liu Qingge’s voice was soft as it was firm. “Calm down. Calm. That’s not a request.”

“I’m trying,” Ming Fan hissed. “You try doing this in the middle of battle.”

“Alright back up plan,” Liu Qingge turned to the still shocked Nie Mingjue. “You. Make yourself useful. He needs a distraction.”

“Wha-“

Liu Qingge shoved Ming Fan into Nie Mingjue, the taller man abruptly catching the man by the waist to steady him before something else caused him to loose balance.

Forgot one: Deleted Extra feat. Yang Yixuan + MF; written with it's og formatting since notes preserved my italics somehow

Cold wind swept past the ravine.

Shaking trees and rustling branches provided the background noise for the twittering creatures who lived in the back mountains. Within this quiet land was a surrounding of high elevation mountains spanning all around the mountain side.

There, Ming Fan sat quietly. Watching the creatures bellow- there were no humans for miles save for those few people within the Ancient Sect, and they were hardly just human anymore.

“So, you’ve finally decided to get off your ass.”

Ming Fan stiffened.

Yang Yixuan’s arms were cross across his breast, idly looking down from the view of Qing JIng Peak.

The landscape had changed much since Ming Fan had last come here, it was greener. With the trees far taller than when Ming Fan had last seen them, the older trees cut down by the ravages of war and time- but new ones taking their place. The silence too, was new. With no disciples Cang Qiong Mountain was a far quieter place than it had been during the height of its Sect Years. Some ascended, some peacefully settling into their next life, and some sticking around. Going to and fro the place carrying out errands and enacting a firm hand where the average Cultivator could not handle. The war had put a damper on such things, what with their stance of neutrality, bu it was no less somewhat of a sobering surprise that those of Cang Qiong Mountain had seen what was happening and judged it would be better to remain quiet.

He knew why of course, it was more practical in the long run for a mythical Sect, they were not here to force the future into their own hands- merely to counter the monsters of the yester years. Still. He wondered.

“You’re thinking so loud I could practically here it,” the former head disciple of Bai Zhan peak, the former Peak Lord himself, continued with a raised brow. “You’re normally quick to empty your mind and dump it onto others.”

Ming Fan scoffed softly, “Normal is a poor basis to use to pass judgement at the moment, even a Bai Zhan Peak buffoon like you should realize such.”

“…”

Ming Fan pursed his lip, anger simmering.

Settle.

Settle.

Settle.

“I’m sorry, that was uncalled for.” He said softly, allowing his fist to slack from their death-like grip.

“You just lost your brohter,” Yang Yixuan said bluntly. “You were a raving asshole when Liu-shifu dragged you here. Pretty much spat at Luo Binghe’s feet and insulted just about everyone.”

Ming Fan restrained the urge to flinch at every word.

“I’d be more than a little troubled if you didn’t act like that after losing your brother.” Yang Yixuan continued with a shake of his head. “It’s good to know that our illustrous Ming Fan is still a human.”

“Have I not proven that time and time again?”

“Dunno,” Ming Fan turned his head, the Bai Zhan Peak’s former sole disciple’s voice turning uncharacteristically soft. “You were doing a pretty good impression of acting like an immortal before.”

#Scum Disciple's Adventures Into the Unknown World #SDAUW #BTS I guess #Are there actually behind the scenes for writing idk #I'll see if I have time to write one since I do have a lot of notes from when i planned this fic #and maybe some bits of the history referenced in SDAUW #MDZS x SVSSS Fanfic #One that is tbh really out there in terms of concept ngl lol #Scum Disciple BTS

[everybody-loves-purdy]

//Swearing + child grooming TW; generally long post

I’m genuinely glad to see people call out the WCRP forums bc I have never seen anyone else do so before, and I didn’t know they were THIS bad. Most users are the worst kind of person to be around; a bunch of snotty, entitled, 11-15 year old white abled kits who think it’s okay to attack people over having different opinions, not roleplaying the way they wanted to, daring to breathe in the wrong direction, etc. I almost considered getting an account at some point; clearly I dodged a bullet.

It’s like acknowledging this series flaws and the communities it harms makes you an radical SJW or some shit. I genuinely came across someone respond to another user stating the series had ableism with a very aggressive “go back to Tumblr”. Lmfao but YES. Come here instead! We’re a better community who can acknowledge this site is less than perfect, get in significantly less fights for less petty reasons, and we don’t go around acting like we’re better than everyone else and anyone with criticism of Brambleshit or the series’ treatment of disabled people should die.

I found a Tumblr blog that discusses the OP’s bad experiences on the forums as well as taking asks from others (don’t wanna tag in case it sends haters their way bc they have anon on, but you can look it up with the #WCRP forums tag and find their post on how bad the mods are, then find them that way). The synopsis is that roleplays are riddled with gatekeeping, people bully each other constantly, staff are ignorant to everything going wrong, and apparently there was outright child grooming going on that the adults just ignored.

And I agree with the previous anons that these people unreasonably believe they’re hot shit or that they’re some kind of silent majority/better part of the fan base, and hearing that they’ll ban for any reason with zero way to negotiate or even hear about why they’re banned is pretty distasteful. No wonder there’s banned accounts everywhere.

Most users just a bunch of usually completely unreasonable, similarly toxic people and a bunch of kids who came just to have fun but ended up getting bullied by older kids and adults alike in a very unsafe environment that other people neglect to make safe. Anyone who isn’t like that is welcome here. The mods there need consequences for their actions.

It’s weird, like you say I don’t see forum callout happen often, but it is just generally a taboo thing to talk about with the wider warriors community- it’s just an unspoken thing just to not go on the forums because of issues like these. Like I say the main times the forum’s existence is acknowledged is because of the spoilers being posted on there. Hell that’s how I first learned about them otherwise I wouldn’t know they existed.

And I had no idea about the gr**ming that is extremely alarming to learn about.

#dogroseberry #tw

[hanfugallery]

笠帽limao, a general term for a type of Chinese hanfu hat, characterized by a wide brim. The primary form had already appeared during the Shang and Zhou dynasties( 1600 B.C.-256B.C.), and its invention was naturally related to shading from the sun and rain, with a large brim that could both block the rain and shade the sun. In ancient China, limao笠帽 were made of many materials, including bamboo baskets, pouches, ramie, yarn etc. The shape of limao笠帽 is with usually large brim, round, square or pointed tops. The later it was developed, the more it resembled today's hats. In the Ming Dynasty this hat was called a damao大帽, yet it's been around before Ming, inherited from the Song Dynasty and earlier dynasties.

The picture below shows two limao unearthed from the tomb of the Yuan Dynasty minister Wang Shixian汪世显.

Then let's take a look at what the limao笠帽 looked like worn by Ming Dynasty soldiers.

What about the damao大帽 worn by non-military officials and civilians in Ming dynasty?

So how did the term of damao in Ming dynasty come about? The origin of damao is recorded in an ancient book of the Ming Dynasty, san cai tu hui《三才图会》(1607). This book is an encyclopedic book written by 王圻Wang Qi and his song 王思义Wang Siyi, who were literature scholars and book collectors during the Ming Dynasty. Here is the quote 《三才图会》:“大帽，尝见稗官云:国初高皇幸学，见诸生班烈日中，因赐遮荫帽，此其制也，今起家科贡者用之。” Generally when Zhu Yuanzhang, the first emperor of the Ming Dynasty, saw the students taking the imperial examinations sweating in the scorching sun, he gave them damao to protect them from the sun. 

The image below is a painting from the Tang dynasty, showing that the basic shape of the damao differs little from that of the Tang dynasty.

The 平番得胜图ping fan de sheng tu is currently housed in the National Museum of China and is considered to be an accurate portrayal of the Ming dynasty's army and is of high reference value.

The above is the consistent history of limao笠帽 in Chinese hanfu. limao was a very common hat in all Chinese dynasties, worn by all classes. The basic shape with a high top made of black gauze and a knotted cord appeared early on. Of course, hats with brims is a common thing for every culture and are found in all parts of the world, just as Eastern and Western civilizations coincidentally documented the prehistoric Flood.

For those interested in more specialized and complete information, here is a ten-minute video detailing the history of limao. 

To summarize, limao was first seen in the Han Dynasty terracotta figurines, called li笠, and documented in writings in the ancient book 急就篇(48b.c.-33b.c.), but the brim was not as big as it is now, in the Northern Dynasty(386-581), limao was inspired by the Xianbei people whose ancestors were nomads in ancient Siberia, so the brim was widened, and the top of the hat was added (recorded in the Northern Dynasty mural) and is almost the same as now, after the consistent development recorded but not limited to the Tang Dynasty terracotta figurines and Song Dynasty paintings, especially that Fanyangli influenced the limao style of the Yuan dynasty, and then the Yuan emperor Kublai Khan added curtains behind the limao, and beads and feathers according to the Mongolian custom, and then Ming emperors removed the curtains in the early Ming dynasty, forming a variety of styles. 

Facts about damao in Ming dynasty

1. damao was influenced by limao of all the previous dynasties, and arose spontaneously. ✔️

2. damao usually have round top, but there were also other forms of top, such as the quadrilateral.✔️

2. In the early Ming dynasty, influenced by the Mongolian style of the Yuan dynasty (Mongolia added the beads according to its own nomadic style), damao used the gems or beads as a string. ✔️

3. In the middle of the fifteenth century, Emperor Yingzong abolished the bead-string, stipulating that the damao could only be worn with plain string. ✔️

4. The adornment of damao was mainly on the top, with jewels, feathers, and red tassels.✔️

5. From ancient paintings, the decorative method of inserting feathers on one or both sides of the hat, is found in the Ming Dynasty and previous dynasties.✔️

6. damao usually matches with wangjin网巾, a kind of mesh scarf tied back the bangs neatly. ✔️

Now high-priced hanfu stores are making the damao exactly according to the Ming Dynasty style, and are considered historically accurate. However, some middle or low priced hanfu store are lazy and don't make it accurately, so the details are confused with another country' traditional hats with brim, or even worse. A few days ago a famous chinese artist accidentally used the picture of damao of that lazy store as reference to draw her super popular characters and post it on twitter, it could be controversial and offensive to some people from another culture who are not familiar with hanfu and lead to misunderstanding. And then she experienced cyberbullying which is really bad. (btw she also provides the correct ancient Ming portrait as a reference though

I have cautiously observed, and must state that the damao she drew does not show a very clear feature that significantly different from the Ming dynasty damao of a traditional hat from another culture, and I think one reference picture of damao from taobao store does have a slight problem and is ambiguous. Incidentally, the non-damao hat that worn by the other character has also attracted criticism is no problem and actually called yishanguan翼善冠, one of the traditional types of hats for Chinese hanfu, which I will describe later.

Well, you get the idea.

In a more general sense, was the ancient Chinese costume culture, while retaining its original form, influenced by xiyu culture (a general reference to non-Chinese countries on the Silk Road, the ancient cultures of Western and Central Asia and the ancient states, xiyu西域 literally meaning western region) and nomadic cultures such as xianbei culture? Yes, especially in the Tang Dynasty. For example, yuanlingpao圆领袍/rongfu戎服. Did ancient China radiate its costume culture to its neighbors(not all of them), leaving behind similar or even convergent forms, while at the same time they developing their own local characteristics? Yes.  If a culture had close contact with China in ancient times, but is geographically separated from China by a long distance or even by the sea, the later its identity will become stronger, and what used to look like Chinese clothing will become less obvious, such as the kimono. 

Here are examples of the basically accurate damao in style of ming dynasty by hanfu store. It does not contain all the types.

#china #hanfu #history #reference #chinese fashion #fashion #limao #damao #this long post is not intended to upset anyone #after all clothes are clothes and as long as they are worn by humans #they have commonalities and have their own characteristics according to different local conditions #after all that's how people dressed in ancient times. #it is possible that many times we are simply locked in an information cocoon and therefore prone to misunderstandings #including myself #Also I find it hilarious to write about this hat in such a serious and substantiated way #it's just hat #I don't know if I made myself clear enough or not #lol #my wording may have been imprecise and I apologize in advance if anyone was offended by it #again it was not my intention

[skyholders]

Lucien: Towards Spring Date [Translation]

Translations under the cut!

Credits to @acrispyapple for all the karma CGs used in this post!

[Section Zero]

The lights in The Highest Bioscience Research Centre were switched on for a very long while. It’s already deep into the night, and yet there's still a lot of people working silently. The hands of the mounted clock ticked slowly, already pointing towards '1’.

Lucien wore a white lab coat, his head hung low as he jotted down the details of the results of the experiments conducted a while ago. Without any time to spare for a break, Ming handed him the compared results right after. A few researchers in the same lab coats surrounded Lucien, splitting the work methodically.

Moments after the experiments have begun once again, a few have reached their limits, rubbing their eyes and heading out for strolls lethargically. However, Lucien’s eyes remained fixated on the scientific paraphernalia right in front of him.

Suddenly, a loud beeping sound came from the depths of his coat’s pocket, its screen lighting through the layer of fabric. Lucien reached towards the phone, yet as soon as he did so, an abnormality appeared within the tables of writings. His hand immediately went to press the off button.

Lucien: “Investigate on the source of reaction.”

•

I squeezed within the crowds in the bookstore, silently celebrating the fact that I’ve arrived and waited at the bookstore early.

MC: “..Even if it’s just a small-scale lecture, Lucien’s popularity is still through the roof,”

Ming told me Lucien’s having a lecture today. Though he was originally busy with work, and had no time for speaking in lectures at all, the speaker suddenly became ill and had to be hospitalised, so Lucien was called in to save the day.

I looked around, towards the place everybody was focused towards.

Lucien: “Therefore, even if it’s just a sudden, fleeting thought, or a small emotion, they’re all involved in a neuronal system that is difficult to be quantified.”

Lucien stood in front of the crowds, explaining complex theories and science. The spot where he stood was pleasant, with spring’s sunshine pouring in in big patches, landing on his brows, his face, his hair – it made the tiniest bit of his hair looked rather fuzzy.

Yet my eyes trailed down, I noticed the light blue of his shirt, and on the sleeve was a button, buttoned into the wrong boutonnière – solid proof that this man hasn’t rested in a very long time. I sighed heavy-heartedly.

Lately Lucien’s been fully immersed in a challenging research, and I have not seen him returning home for while. He’s been replying to my messages at late midnights as well. I’ve also heard that the research centre’s been in high pressure lately, as everyone’s confident in the research, believing in the possibility of a breakthrough. Ming told me as well,

Ming: “Everyone’s been treating the professor like a God, as long as we’re under his guidance, we’ve got to be on the right path. We do place all of our trust in him.”

But humans can’t possibly be Gods after all..

Before I could get out of my distracted mind, Lucien’s already ended his talk. He walked towards me, seemingly unsurprised at the idea of me being there.

Lucien: “Looks like next time, I’ll have to let Ming keep the secrets a little better.”

Perhaps assuming that I wasn’t going to reply, he raised his hand, and lightly knocked on my forehead.

MC: “It’s not Ming, also-“

I was thinking of what to say next, when suddenly, I was cut off by someone cutting in from right beside me.

Fan: “Hello Professor Lucien! I’m a big fan! I’m so happy to have the chance to listen to your lectures. Can you recommend a few books related to the topic?”

Lucien smiled as he agreed.

Lucien: “Of course.”

He looked towards me and smiled apologetically.

Lucien: “Can you wait for me?”

MC: “Mm, I’ll be waiting for you by the seats over there.”

[Section One]

While waiting for Lucien, I absentmindedly took a collection of English poems and skimmed around it on the seat. However, after a while my focus had unconsciously shifted from the books, and right towards Lucien.

He stood by a shelf of books, his hand holding a few books as he bent down to look for the other books.

Under the sunlight, a silhouette casted itself right before him. And I could tell that he’s gotten thinner once again.

On the days when he’s not home, I’d send messages to him everyday to remind him to eat and sleep on time. Yet his responses are sent hours after, always with an apology. And the next time, it’ll be the same. There are times where I’m tempted to just snatch him home from the research centre, order him to not think of anything else, and just take a break. Yet a part of my mind thought of how important it must be for him, how he’s got to put all of his efforts into it in order to succeed..

After thinking of it for quite some time, suddenly, it’s as if Lucien’s noticed something. Because he stopped, and tilted his head to look towards me.

!

Our gazes caught one another’s mid-air, and suddenly, his eyes curved, and the corners of his lips lifted up into a soft simper. It’s like he’s dug a hole within the small of my heart – his smile’s natural and gentle, as if he’s always the professor who’s skilled and clever in everything.

Lucien handed the carefully selected books to the audience, and exchanged a few words with them. I’ve overheard bits of the fan’s overwhelmed and excited voice.

Fan: “Thank you Professor Lucien!”

Fan: “I heard one of your researches have been about decoding one of the scientific community’s biggest challenges. That’s impressive!”

Lucien smiled politely, yet he didn’t say anything.

After greeting the audience goodbye, he walked over, his arm lightly resting on the back of my chair. He bent down slightly to read the book I was holding in my hands, and turned to look at me.

Lucien: “Sorry for the wait. Would you like to get coffee together?”

His eyes held a genuine sense of joy, dark pupils lightly landing themselves onto my shadow.

MC: “Can I suggest something else if we don’t get coffee?”

Lucien furrowed his brows, and sighed lightly.

Lucien: “But I’ll have to rush back to the research centre later..”

He seemed to not be used to rejecting me at all. However, when speaking, his eyes showed a rare sight of reluctance.

Lucien: “Is it alright if we do it next time?”

I let go of the book in my hands, stood up, and held his hand. His large palm immediately wrapped itself around mine, his eyes focused on me.

MC: “It’s not something that will take a lot of time.”

I held his hand as we walked out of the bookstore, and winked towards him lightly.

MC: “How about you send me home?”

And immediately after that, I added,

MC: “It’s a convenient route to the research centre as well.”

MC: “So – is it okay if Professor Lucien walk me home first, and then go to the research centre?”

Lucien glanced at the watch strapped on his wrist, as if in a moment of thought, before looking at me and smiling lightly.

He reached out to pull the doors of the bookstore open, and tilted his head to look at me, with a bit of glee in his eyes.

Lucien: “Mm, it’s definitely a suitable route.”

Lucien: “Let’s go, Ms. Audience whom have not only invited herself, but have also decided to ‘lean’ onto me as well.”

[Section Two]

As we’re about to reach the front entrance, I slowed my pace, pretending to not have noticed that I did so as I chatted with Lucien.

MC: “Oh right, lately you’ve been in the research centre all the time, so I’ve been taking care of the flowers on your balcony. They’ve blossomed these past few days, won’t you like to go and see?”

Lucien looked at me a little surprised, however, upon looking at my excited face, he nodded and smiled softly.

Lucien: “Of course.”

The balcony was bursting with life, with gardenias and irises blooming along with the season, their petals basking in the sunshine’s warmth. Lucien stood on the balcony, his gaze landing on each and every flower, as if his sight was painted with the most brilliant of colours.

The warm spring breezes blew gently past him, and he broke his gaze as he said,

Lucien: “You’ve taken such good care of them. Much better than their owner.”

I bent down as I skillfully used a small pair of scissors to snip away the dry leaves and branches.

MC: “I’ve heard the florescence of irises are short, only blooming in spring.”

MC: “They bloom so greatly, yet the owner isn’t around. If I were a flower on your balcony, I’d be bored to death.”

I said simply, pretending that I was only concerning the health of the flowers on his balcony.

Behind me, Lucien laughed airily.

I turned around to see that Lucien’s mirrored my actions, bending down slightly to check the petals of every flower.

Lucien: “Did they told you so?”

I nodded, acting stern.

MC: “They did.”

I pointed at the pot of flowers in front of me,

MC: “Look, this iris flower was still a bud when I was watering it yesterday. But today, it’s bloomed completely. Maybe it does know that there will be someone admiring them today.”

Lucien’s eyes stayed on the violet flower thoughtfully.

Lucien: “If that is so, I’ve been neglecting them too much.”

He said it as a matter of fact. I was bewildered for a moment, before responding with,

MC: “..If that’s how you think of it, then yes, you’re right.”

Lucien grinned gently, his head tilted as he looked towards me, his gaze gentle and soft.

Lucien: “Ms. MC, won’t you teach me how to tend to their branches?”

He lifted up a pair of scissors as he observed the pot of golden acacia flowers.

Lucien: “It seems unenergetic.”

MC: “You’re right,”

He reached to hold the drooping golden flowers of the acacia plant, his lashes downcast as he turned his focus onto them. I looked at the pot of flowers as well, and said after a while later,

MC: “Normally, it’ll be alright once you water them. But I’ve watered them yesterday, so what’s going on..”

MC: “Wait, I’ll go grab my botany notebook!”

I rushed back into the house, stopping in front of Lucien’s bookcase and taking out a notebook with much familiarity. When I turned however, I’ve knocked myself onto Lucien’s chest.

MC: “What’s wrong?”

Lucien helped me up, his eyes landing onto the notebook on my hands with a glint of amusement.

Lucien: “Seems like you’ve been doing lots of homework while I’m away.”

MC: “That’s because I thought.. I was hoping no matter when you might come home, you’ll still feel a little bit of spring.”

My hands trailed lightly on the cover of the notebook as I added,

MC: “I’ve also taken the opportunity to learn about the little facts to nurturing plants, so I think it’s a win-win situation.”

After hearing what I’ve said, Lucien was stunned momentarily, before he smiled once more.

Lucien: “I’m intrigued to know what you’ve learned.”

MC: “There are lots of them, let me read them out.”

I sat on a cushioned seat, and soon Lucien sat on the floor as well. And, as if he’s truly trying to focus on a lecture, he put his glasses on. The sunlight steps through sheer white curtains, gently and silently colouring themselves onto him.

I’ve seen Lucien in glasses many, many times. However, no matter how many times I’ve seen it, I’ll still subconsciously think that they look good on him.

Lucien laid his head on one of his hand. In that moment, he looked like a student, focusing attentively onto me. Seeing my dazed look, he couldn’t help but chuckled.

Lucien: “What’s wrong?”

MC: “..Nothing.”

I kept my gaze away from him, and flipped open the notebook, a little surprised.

MC: “I didn’t realise I’ve noted down so many things..”

I couldn’t help but feel a bit of pride growing within me as I cleared my throat, and began my little introduction of botany and the nurturing of flowers for Lucien.

MC: “Let’s start with the different ways to water different types of plants. Herbaceous plants needed to be watered plentifully, while it’s not as necessary for xylophytic ones. For example, you can soak the money leaves in water, but you can’t do it for the gardenia flowers.”

I lifted my gaze to look at Lucien, as he nodded in agreement.

Lucien: “I see.”

I flipped to the next page, and read,

MC: “You’ll have to be wary of pests in Spring. Laundry powder, milk and other things can be made into pesticides. Isn’t that interesting?”

As I continued reading, I relaxed myself and laid against the soft cushioned seat. The spring’s rays of sun landed on my face cozily. My ears caught onto Lucien’s soft laughter, and his arm wrapped me into his embrace. I lifted my head, seeing the line of his jaw clearly.

His voice and tones were relaxed, his words gentle and kind.

Lucien: “Have you bore yourself from reading?”

I shook my head, my hand attempting to cover my face from the sunlight’s embrace. My thoughts were slow and hazy, clumsily floating about in the air. Suddenly, I couldn’t help but say:

MC: “I miss you, Lucien.”

Lucien’s light breaths came to an abrupt halt.

The afternoon’s minutes drifted slowly and silently. I covered my eyes, scouring for all the things I’ve been wanting to tell Lucien lately, then, spilling them out.

MC: “I bought a new spring exclusive tea, I’ve been wanting to try it with you. They say QinMing tea is at its best quality, with a mild flavour. I figure you’ll like it.”

MC: “You’ve been stuck in researches, so you must’ve not eaten well..”

MC: “I have especially went to the research centre to give you a lunch box, but I couldn’t even see you.”

MC: “And I don’t know if someone as busy as Professor Lucien actually finished the lunch box too.”

Words kept falling out of my mouth, and Lucien grew quiet. I removed my hand from my face hesitantly, meeting a pair of dark-coloured eyes.

Lucien looked at me soundlessly, his emotions indecipherable.

MC: “I’m not complaining, Lucien..”

He suddenly brought his hands to my temples, and rubbed them gently.

Lucien: “Mm, I know that.”

Lucien: ��It’s my fault, I’ve made you worried.”

[Section Three]

The afternoon sun continued basking its tender light indoors, the notebook in his hand held tilted aside. I rolled over towards it, and looked at Lucien. He kept his usual mellow gaze, however, hidden under downcast lashes were his gentle eyes.

Lucien: “I’ve eaten every lunch box, and they were all delicious. We can make the tea together, and I’ll leave my serious review.”

As he was telling me all of that, a light, seemingly helpless chuckle left his lips.

Lucien: “I’ve been too busy lately, I am a little tired.”

Lucien: “I did not want you to know, and yet you’ve discovered it still.”

It’s a rarity for Lucien to say these things with such honesty, and so I kept quiet, listening soundlessly.

Lucien: “I did not know I’d make you this worried.”

Hearing the guilt in his voice, I thought for a little while, before responding,

MC: “Actually, I didn’t think too much about it.”

MC: “It’s just that the flowers have bloomed, and I’d love for you to see it. Spring is here, and I’d like to see spring with you. That’s all.”

To other people, Lucien can be a scientific prodigy, can be a gentle, likable professor, he can be a restless research machine.

But to me, the him who’s been peeled of each layer of a given identity, of every distance, is the real Lucien only I know of. He’s an important person who I’d love to experience things with, slowly, and one by one.

Lucien looked at me silently through his glasses, and I noticed the corners of his lips lifting slightly, can see the space between his brows gradually relaxing.

Lucien: “Perhaps you’re right, MC.”

Lucien: “No one can ever create a rest-less machine.”

Lucien: “You have pulled me from the data and analytics of the laboratory, and allowed me to see this small corner of spring. I’m very happy.”

The iris on the balcony swayed at the mercy of the winds, as if awaiting an arriving message.

I was reminded of a passage I’ve skimmed across in the poetry book.

‘The sunlight clasps the earth,

And the moonbeams kiss the sea—

What is all this sweet work worth

If thou kiss not me?’*

I reached out my arms without a warning, wanting to remove the pair of glasses on the bridge of his nose.

Yet as if a kindred spirit, he laughed lightly, and pulled his glasses away before me. Pleasant breezes brought along with them the fragrance of flowers, and Lucien lowered slightly, the tip of his nose nuzzling against my cheek lovingly.

The whole room was enveloped with a soft floral scent, and Lucien’s breath was long and steady. I could feel as he slowly relaxed his breathing, and raised my hand to reach to his hair as I ran across them lightly.

The fuzzy feeling of strands of hair through the tips of my fingers, soft and smooth.

MC: “Actually, in the beginning, I did missed you a little bit.”

MC: “I wanted to tell you, that spring is here.”

MC: “But maybe humans are too greedy after all, because when I really did meet you, I did not just want a glance of you, or to only talk to you.”

MC: “I want to be with you, to see with our eyes, and to smell with the tips of our noses.”

MC: “And.. stay in the light of spring, together.”

Lucien chuckled, and simply lowering his head and burying it in the nook of my neck.

I asked carefully,

MC: “Then.. will you still go to the research centre?”

Lucien grinned as he glanced towards me, his hand tracing my arm until it reaches my wrist, and held it.

Lucien: “I am not going today.”

Lucien: “I’d not like to miss the florescence that’ll only happen once a year, after all.”

[END]

NOTE:

The poem MC read was "Love's Philosophy" by Percy Bysshe Shelley. If you're interested, read the full poem here.

Hope you've enjoyed, have a nice day, and stay safe!

-Shio

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