Tumgik
#yes I stayed up all night reading about the
Text
chapter four
i’ll tell you the truth but never goodbye
Tumblr media Tumblr media
a/n: i hope this chapter makes you cry 😂
tw: there’s a bit of angst, and definitely lots of fluff. y/n struggling with being a single mum. mason being a gorgeous mf. lily being the cutest human, lots of lily appreciation too.
3.100k words
It didn’t come as a surprise to see Jaz keeping her promise to support you as best as she could - you got daily FaceTime calls, texts, and Instagram DMs. You got post-ballet dinners and ice cream, the four of you becoming closer each day - Lily and Summer were inseparable now, and you had Jaz not getting tired of telling you she felt like you’d become the sister she never had.
Not being able to control where your thoughts went, your mind made you question a few times how it would’ve been having this extra support when you were pregnant, and you asked yourself if you’d ever stop being hunted by the countless what-ifs of yours and Lily’s life. You had to stop and take a deep breath and just force yourself to focus on all the wonderful things that were happening now, and how much you wanted them to still be this way when it was time to tell Mason, and everyone else.
Despite having Jaz reassure you that things would end up well, Mason was pretty much unknown territory to you, emotionally speaking - yes, you gave birth to his “mini-me”, but that was no guarantee that you were able to predict him. Not knowing what to expect should’ve made you stay as far away as possible from him, but after you had a text message from Jaz sharing the big news that Mason would be at the ballet recital, while you watched your daughter roll her eyes in the delight as she devoured the pancakes and strawberries on her plate, you decided to reply to that message he had sent you weeks ago.
What you didn’t expect was for him to reply within less than a minute.
“Mummy, are you okay?” Lily had her eyebrows frowned at you, she curiously scanned your probably pale face as your heart pounded against your chest. A simple nod was enough for her to focus back on the pancakes, but also give you occasional and quick glares as your shaky hands tightly held the phone.
You barely had any appetite left as you felt your stomach dropping when Mason texted that - so, he wanted to see you. It wasn’t time yet, at least, it didn’t feel like it. But should the ballet recital be the best place to meet him? Would you be able to act surprised and sustain casualty at that meeting that’d be sort of arranged by his sister?
So many questions and insecurity surrounded you whenever Mason was on your mind, and having to look into Lily’s hazel eyes, her smile, and everything else on her that was his copy only made it worse for you - it was nearly suffocating, and you just needed a mother and daughter moment to focus on anyone but Lilian.
“Peanut,” you poked her tummy, making her giggle. “Why don’t we have a girl's afternoon today, huh? Museum, whatever you want for lunch and we can wrap it with skincare and Moana!”
Lily stood on the chair - your instinct making you hold her arm - and made her little celebration dance, still chewing the pancake, her dark brown soft curls bouncing. That vision completely took your breath away, you often couldn’t believe such a precious girl was your daughter.
Not that all of your days weren’t already hers, but dedicating a whole day off to Lily was your favourite thing to do. When she was just a baby, you often imagined how these days would be, with your little best friend and soulmate, on coffee dates and nights where you’d light up a scented candle and read her a book. The way your voice soothed her was Lily’s favourite thing, combined with your smell. It made her feel safe like nothing could ever harm her. In her dreams, her daddy joined the two of you - she couldn’t see his face but could feel the warmth of his hand holding hers and his laugh was the best sound in the world. Lily wondered if she’d ever meet him, the only thing she knew and was happy about was the fact that she looked like him, as you’ve told her countless times.
Careful not to lose Lily from your sight as she walked three steps in front of you, her eyes not sure what she wanted to focus her attention on at the museum, your mind went back to Mason’s last words to you that morning. So, he wanted to apologise for the way he treated you. Part of you felt good about it, that he had finally recognised what a complete twat he had been, but the other part of you just thought how that made no difference now - it was in the past. Not buried, since your past with him had taken the most angelic human form, but it wouldn’t change things. It was all about the future now.
For lunch, Lily insisted on spaghetti, her all-time favourite food. You had to persuade her a bit to eat a bit of protein too because pasta would make her feel hungry again by the afternoon, and you knew how much she hated being hungry right before taking a nap - your persuasion included the word dessert, so not much time was wasted trying to convince her to accept some chicken with her pasta.
Your phone buzzed with a real-time picture of Jaz and Summer by the time you had just bought a gorgeous bouquet of yellow roses, Lily’s favourite. She insisted that a good girls’ night would only be complete if you had fresh roses, that she wanted to carry herself. You quickly snapped a picture of her and sent it to Jaz, asking why they’d have to grow up so fast and that her niece was insufferable.
“Can you please behave like a child and not like an adult, Lilian Maisie?” like a little kid, you pouted, suddenly emotional to see so much wit and wisdom in your tiny human.
Lily giggled, “Mummy!” she held your hand, placing a soft kiss against it and walking according to your pace. “Can we go home now?” You nodded, quickly fetching an Uber to drive you home.
By the time you got there, she was already heavily sleeping in your arms as you clumsily also carried your purse and the flowers, and tried to open the door without troubling her sleep - if it was up to you, you’d find a way for mums to have an extra pair of arms, they’d definitely be useful in times like these.
You knew Lily wouldn’t sleep that much, so the sofa was where you put her before putting the roses in the water and getting rid of your coat. It was almost dark outside, so you also started to prepare the apartment for movie night. Your little girl woke up with a loud yawn that was followed by a wide smile when she noticed the blankets and pillows on the floor, some candies in a bowl, and fruits too, which were her favourite snacks.
“Matching pyjamas?” you winked at her and giggled as Lily nodded repeatedly, stretching her arms at you so you’d carry her to the bedroom.
A few minutes later you were cuddling under the blankets and watching Moana for the millionth time. You fell asleep shortly before the film ended and were quickly followed by Lily as she hummed an “I love you, mummy” and kissed the tip of your nose.
Despite not being the most comfortable place for your back to spend the night, there was no other place you’d rather be right now, holding your daughter's warm and small body - the smell of her strawberry shampoo and the pace of her calm breathing taking you to a place where no nightmares, no worries, would catch you in your sleep. You woke up in the middle of the night when she moved a bit and, after watching her sleep for a few minutes, finally turned off the TV and quickly texted Mason before going back to sleep.
When you woke up, there was a message from Jaz saying that they’d all go out for dinner after the ballet recital, and as hard as it was, you had to politely decline for you’d have a little celebration with your own family in a pre-Christmas party since a few members wouldn’t be joining at Foxwoods this year. And that you wouldn’t be able to be around Mason before telling him all the truth, which led to you telling her that he had reached you and you agreed to talk. She went from upset to hopeful in the blink of an eye.
As you prepared for the recital, you had to deal with an impatient and bossy Lily - combined with stress from work, that you had to forcefully turn into home office for the Holidays, the exhaustion that took over your body grew by the minute. It resulted in calling your mum for help, who showed up with your dad on her side by your door.
“You know she’d ask for me anyway, kid!” Your always cheerful father rubbed his hands together as he went straight for his granddaughter, who waited for him with her arms up, waiting to be spun around like a doll. You loved how your dad, a serious and famous lawyer, turned so soft whenever Lily was around - and now, how he’d cope with having to eventually “share” her with her other grandfather.
“Where do you need me to begin, amor?” Your mother’s heavy Colombian accent woke you up, and a sigh of relief parted your lips as you pulled her into a hug. “What is wrong, bebe? Tell your mamá,” Her hands softly stroked your back as you just closed your eyes and enjoyed being the daughter instead of being the mum.
“It’s nothing, I’m just exhausted. I thought that being one of the bosses would give me more free time but it’s just more work, and Lily is insufferable with this recital thing,” you sniffed. “I’m so glad it’s finally tomorrow.”
But you also weren’t, because it meant you’d see Mason after five years.
-
If anyone told you that your daughter’s ballet recital would be the place you’d almost certainly meet her father again, especially without him being the father of another kid there, you’d just roll your eyes and leave - as you stood in front of your closet, not sure about what to wear, your mind played tricks on you creating different scenarios on how that meeting would go. There was so much expectation from you, so much anxiety to see how Mason would react. He thought you’d meet for coffee sometime soon, not at a ballet recital where you were the mother of one of the kids.
Much to your relief, Willow arrived at your place right on time to save you from a breakdown over “what to wear to meet the father of my daughter after five years without looking like an exhausted mother, but also drop-dead gorgeous, and respectful”.
“Lord, that’s specific!” Willow screeched, not really helping you, in the end. “Why do you want to impress him anyway?”
“Willie, I know you’re smarter than this,” you replied as she just shrugged, still waiting for an answer. You got a positive reaction when you picked a knit burgundy dress, so you tried it on and what you saw in the mirror made you satisfied. “The next time I see him it’ll be to tell him the truth, so he needs a good first second impression.”
“His first impression of you was good enough,” she teased, watching your cheeks blush as she helped to remove the dress tag. “But you’re wearing a brand new dress for him tonight, so I’m sure the second impression will be just as good.”
“Stop it, silly. You know it’s not like this, and he doesn’t know it’s a new dress.”
Willow kept teasing you with her glares and smirks as the five of you drove to the small theatre rented for the night by the ballet studio, it was already a bit crowded when you got there and you rushed to take Lily to the backstage, where all her ballet friends greeted her in excitement. It truly was the cutest thing in the world, those little humans in their tutus, giggling and chatting like they were grown-ups.
With a quick and wet kiss on your daughter’s cheek - that made her adorably embarrassed - and a hug on Summer, you told the girls how wonderful they were and left to find your family. You quickly spotted Willow and Jaz laughing about something that made you curious, and although you were happy to see Jasmine, you also hoped it’d take a little longer to meet her and, potentially, the rest of her family. And Mason, to be more specific.
“He’s not here yet,” like she could read your mind, Jaz’s words caused you to sigh in relief. “You look gorgeous, by the way!”
Smiling at her, you softly stroked her bump. “You too, pretty mumma.”
As the lights dimmed down, announcing that the recital would begin soon, you and Willow parted ways from Jaz to meet your family. Your dad held your hand and gently squeezed it, his eyes already sparkling with tears - the truth was you couldn’t have done it without your parents, but your dad was something else. It was expected that being showered with affection would be something you’d get from your mum, who was a Latina, but you got it all from your dad because, according to him, you were the result of how much he adored your mum and Lily was an extension of that. His legacy, as he’d say. He never questioned your choices, the way you raised your daughter, nor why you never talked about who Lily’s father was. The respect your parents had for you was overwhelming, and that’s why you’d tell the whole truth tonight as soon as Lily was peacefully asleep.
When the five-year-olds act began, you were the one ready to let some tears roll down your cheeks. There she was, your Lilian Maisie, as beautiful as ever on her first ballet performance - something you never truly expected, since she had always been the adventurous type of kid. But you watched her balance it so perfectly that you often questioned if she was just five years old, and also how she’d be as a grown woman. As she danced, you had a clear vision of Lily in her early twenties. She was tall, her hair was a bit darker now but the soft curls were still there and so was the natural flush on her cheeks. She was beautiful and finally looked a bit more like you, but Mason’s smile was still there. She was kind, full of hope, funny, gracious and so smart. She was loved by everyone around her and made their lives better by simply existing.
When her act ended, you proudly stood up and clapped your hands as if your life relied on it. Her eyes scanned the audience, looking for you, and when she finally found you her face lit up and that smile you loved so much was there, making your heart melt. “I love you,” you mumbled, and she just winked at you.
Gosh, there was no way Mason wouldn’t love this girl to the point his heart would nearly explode. You wanted him to have it too.
Excusing yourself as the older girls got on stage, you went to the bathroom to fix your makeup. As you looked at yourself in the mirror, you searched for your phone and, with a courage you hadn’t felt in the longest time, you typed a quick message to Mason asking if he’d be willing to meet the next day, in the afternoon.
What you didn’t expect was to find him right outside, holding his phone with a wide smile on his lips.
Mason Mount looked as gorgeous as he’d ever been - you could smell his cologne even if you were at least ten steps away from him. Wearing black jeans, and a Dior sweater that made him look breathtakingly gorgeous, Mason ended the distance between you as you felt your heart beating faster each second. He was still holding his phone when he stopped in front of you.
“I literally just texted you back saying yes,” he ran his fingers through his hair and that was as sexy as you remembered. Mason had a beard now, and although he was still young, the wrinkles on the corners of his eyes were more evident now. “You’re the last person I thought I’d meet here.”
You nodded, forcing your brain to put some words together. “You too.” Lie. But you had to make it look like it was just a coincidence.
“You look incredible, Y/n,” Mason said under his breath, his eyes shamelessly scanning your outfit. That same pair of eyes was your favourite thing to look at every morning. Now you knew what Willow meant when she said that Lily and Mason were identical - how could he not notice when they met? “There’s so much I wanna say to you,” he continued.
“Save it for tomorrow.” You interrupted, not wanting to sound rude, and Mason nodded in agreement.
“Can I pick you up around 3?”
“I think we should meet there.” You said, thinking of how suffocating and awkward it’d be being inside a car with him after all these years. “There’s a nice place I usually go with my dau-,” you coughed, watching his brows frown. “With my best friend. I’ll text you the address and we’ll meet there.”
Then, all of a sudden, Mason pulled you into a hug. His warmth against your body melted your heart, and you could feel how his breath deepened as his arms tightened around your figure. “I’ll meet you there, so I can decently apologise for being a complete idiot to someone incredible like you.”
His words were all you needed to know for sure that this wouldn’t be easy.
Was he being genuine, or was he just trying to get into your pants like he did back then? Either way, things were immensely different now, for this wasn’t just about you and Mason anymore.
This was about her - Lily. It was about her future, her happiness, how his presence in her life would have a tremendous impact on how she’d develop and what kind of adult she’d be. Nothing would ever be the same, and there was nowhere to run.
Tumblr media
This was going to be tough.
————
BONUS - SOCIAL MEDIA
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
151 notes · View notes
faegoddessog · 3 days
Text
"You don't think I could be a Dom?"
A story whose elements were voted on by all ya'll beautiful people as my thank you to my first 100 (+) followers!
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Summary (with % of votes): An Austin Story (38.5%) with a Friends to Lovers trope(a whopping 79.2%), in which a  Dominant Austin (56%) ends up showing you that he can indeed Edge and Overstim (52.2%) the fuck out of You (65.4%)  
Warnings: Dom/Sub, cock warming, timed cocksucking, unprotected PiV, a little shove/jolt to the chest, use of possessive pronouns, edging, overstimulation, cuming like a rockstar inside you, a fucking rockstar.
Here you go my lovelies! I hope you enjoy what I came up with based on your votes. Thank you for reading, liking, following and most of all sharing with me! I love hearing from you!!
My Masterlist
Please let me know if you'd like to be removed from this taglist!
@purejasmine, @slowsweetlove, @richardslady121, @austinbutlerslovers, @tadpoleteef, @allittakesisoneflight, @thisworldisntrealhoney,  @1nho,  @megangovier, @briaandthephantoms, @andro-inherdreamworld @callumsgirl @blombardo  @fefeisastar @hacunamy @nestito702 @denised916 @jayydep @r0m4nitcl0v3r @heyidc03, @secondchild-2, @flander42 @natural-born-rebel-spirit @lecosymood @kathrynzaragoza @bsunshinexo @jayydep @ifyouloveweedletsgosmoke
"You don't think I could be a Dom?"
You aren’t sure exactly how you got here. Staring into his face, a pool of juices threatening to moisten your delicates. 
You had known Austin for years, both part of the same group of friends in your late teens and early twenties. Couples had broken up, people had gone their separate ways, but you still kept in touch with Austin, still cajoled him into dinner with you and a couple others every other month or so. At least when he’s in town.
This night, it had ended up being only you two for the first time, everyone else adulting so hard that they couldn’t make it. 
It had started as a dare between him and his then girlfriend years ago, before they broke up. They had been playing “Never have I ever” with their rowdy and now somewhat drunk group of friends. 
“Never have I ever read fanfic about Austin,” one of them had said.
Austin looked down, laughing and shy. You and his then girlfriend both laughed and took big swigs of your drinks. 
“You’ve never read one?” his girlfriend had said, looking at him shocked, “Oh babe, they are so funny you have to, I DARE you!” 
“This isn’t a game of truth or dare!” he had declared. 
“It is now!”  You had said, laughing.
You pulled up one on the laptop and started reading it outloud to the group. It was riotous. 
Then there were just a few odd stories, clumsily jotted down by (presumably) teens that had little to no clue about crafting a story, let alone how to use punctuation and grammar. The sex knowledge was basic, little more than ardent attempts to relieve the author's own horniness. With social media then in its fetal stages, being open about sex was a bit more taboo than now. 
“I dunno,” he had said when his girlfriend had rolled her eyes at the stories, “It’s weirdly flattering, if a little awkward. I think it’s brave of them to try and express themselves, even more so to actually put it out there.” He was so vulnerable and kind, even then. You thought it made him adorable and cute, especially so when his face was red with embarrassment. 
It has been years since you teased him about being an internet muse. But you never stopped reading them. It was your guilty pleasure, the one allowance you made yourself about your secret crush. 
“Remember those stories about you?” you had said not 10 minutes ago. You two had decided to stay in and make tacos and margaritas.  It had been so nice to reconnect with Austin, to see that he was still the same sweet guy and that the Hollywood machine wasn’t getting to him much.
“Oh god yes” he groaned, “I can only imagine what is out there now.” 
“Oh yeah, there are several good ones, even novel length ones,” you smirked at him.
“Wait, you’ve read them?!” he asked, eyes wide. 
“I get curious from time to time,” you had shrugged, “some are crazy accurate about your personality. Some are so far-fetched they are funny.” 
In all honesty, you had always thought Austin was hot. You had secretly wanted him then, but you’d never be that girl.  You had watched him be such an amazing boyfriend for so long. He was so kind and loving, you had watched as he took care of his Mom. You had seen his depths.  You loved him to his core, but he had always remained just your friend. When his fame skyrocketed and all you tried to be was just a safe place where he could still be himself.
You had no clue that he had been having those same thoughts about you for years.
“Far fetched? Like what?” he had asked, intrigued of what she thought about him.
“Oh, like you being twisted and dark, or manipulative,” you said as he shook his head, “or you being a top, a Dom. That one makes me laugh.” 
He agreed, he was not dark and twisted at heart, and he was nowhere near manipulative. But dominant? Clearly you had no clue what happens behind closed doors. You were about to find out. 
“Dominant? You don’t think I could be a Dom?” he had asked with a raised eyebrow.  
You had always been one of the leaders of the friend group, putting forth suggestions and making decisions when no one else wanted to. You actually liked to be dominated in bed. Given your secret crush on this man, you’d fantasized more than once about him, but never about him telling you what to do. The idea seemed absurd to you.
“You have always been so flexible and just going with the flow. I can’t remember a time that you spoke up, were contrary.  I mean like when we were trying to decide what to do or where to eat.”  You leaned across the table corner, putting your hand on his cheek, “Austin, you are just too sweet to take control like that.” 
His eyes had narrowed to slits, and he clamped his hand on your wrist. Your intake of breath was sharp and involuntary. Your eyes widen. Electricity crackles between you two. 
“Bold of you to assume that I’ve never dommed before. Do I need to show you?” his eyes on yours, his voice dropping low and nearly threatening. 
And now, here you were, your whole pelvic floor tight and locked in his intense gaze. You honestly can not breathe. 
You had always thought of him more like a puppy, a golden retriever eager to be around the people he loved and eager to please. This was a whole new side you’ve never seen before.  You should say no, shake his grip and laugh it away. But your desire rises, buffeted by the seriousness in his eyes and the slight flare to his nostrils. 
“Promises, promises,”  your voice is sultry as your hands touch his chest, outlining the muscles there. He didn’t used to be this big, this defined. 
“Oh, now it’s a challenge. I love a challenge,” his forehead crinkles slightly on the word ‘love’. 
His body is rising, leaning forward into you, his grip still tight on your wrist. Without a lick of hesitation, his lips are pressed to yours. It’s a soft kiss but with power behind it. Nothing about his movements, his words, or even his damn aura suggests that your lips weren’t his for the taking. 
His projection of power and dominance makes your will go slack and your knees weak. You think fleetingly you should just stop this, laugh it off as a joke, but you find that you simply can’t. Austin just makes you want to submit.
“Yeah, kiss me more,” you say. A feeble attempt to establish some kind of equilibrium in the situation. But he pulls away. 
“Safe word?” he asks, ignoring your request. 
“C- colors?” you can barely find your voice. “Green, yellow, red. I-if that’s ok?” you ask. Fuck why are you asking and not just telling him? Jesus, this took a turn quickly. 
He just nods his acquiescence. You lean forward to draw him into a kiss. He lets go of your wrist and leans further away, subtly keeping his high ground. 
He watches your irises expand in desire. He is internally amused at how very eager you are to submit to him. Had he known, he would have tried this years ago. You had always been such a powerhouse of a friend. Always calling shots, always planning events and making things happen. He had admired your commitment and effort in being his friend. You had always sparked him, but one or both of you always seemed unavailable. He had indeed intended to talk with you about friends with benefits, but never had he hoped an opening like this would arise. It is perfect. 
“Have I rectified your opinion of my ability to take control?” he asks, voice like honey. 
“Yes,” is all you can breathe out. 
“Now for a most important question… color?” He is looking down at you from under his long beautiful eyelashes, his fingers tracing over your shoulders. 
It takes you a second to realize that he is asking if you want to continue, for permission to keep going. You know that he would stop right now if you said it, but at this moment, wild horses couldn't drag the word ‘red’ from your lips. 
‘Fuck, there is no way you are going to NOT do this,’ you tell yourself, ‘He is just too fine to turn down.’
“Green?” he prompts when you don’t answer.  
“Super Green,” your body yearns towards him, begging him without words. 
“Heh heh heh,” his chuckle rumbles low in his throat at your movie reference. His bottom lip is pulled in by his tongue and captured with his teeth. 
“I must confess, I was hoping, with us being alone tonight, that maybe we could….. open up to new possibilities in our friendship,” he brushes hair back from your face. “And here you are being such a gem for me, like a little pearl waiting under all those clothes.” He sits back in his chair and crosses his legs. “Now be a good girl and take them off,” his voice simply requires obedience.
It was a test really, to see if you would, to see if you really meant it. He watches as you stand.
Your clothes seem to peel themselves off. You are surprised when you pull your panties off that they don’t stick to your labia with how turned on you are at this moment. 
“MMM, good girl,” he praises as he stands, towering above you. His hand snakes around the back of your neck, you can feel the rings on his fingers against your occiput. 
“I think such good submissiveness earned you a kiss,” he lowers those perfect lips to yours. His tongue draws light lines, gently pressing them open. He’s fucking good at it, the kissing. Your arms wrap around him, wanting to feel more of him against you. Being naked with him clothed adds an extra element to his dominance.
“I feel it’s only fair to warn you, that I’m gonna fuck you until you know nothing but my cock and my name,” his smile deviant and sexy as all hell. 
He reaches behind him, grabbing your wrists again. 
“Do you want my cock, little Pearl?” he asks, lips still brushing yours.
Being asked this question erases any semblance of ‘real world’. Your only reality is the one in which you are stark naked, wet between the thighs, and under the thrall of the most divine form of man since The David was sculpted. And if that form happened to belong to one of your closest friends for years? So be it. 
“Oh god yeah” you say, nothing but honesty from your lips. 
He brings your hands to the button fly on his jeans. 
“Then take it out,” his voice vibrating with desire.
You rub your palm against him, god you’ve always wanted to see what he was packing in here. 
“I didn’t tell you to fondle me,” his voice is slightly disapproving, “Just take. My cock. Out.” 
He doesn't have to do anything more than speak slowly and distinctly and you are rushing to obey him. Shaking hands undo the top button on his fly, pulling the rest apart a little too eagerly but with a satisfying little rip.  You see the little spot of wetness on his boxer briefs where his tip was pressed to the fabric.
Your fingertips dive into the waistband, pulling it out and down. His shaft strains against  the lip of fabric keeping it in. Your hand gently slides down under his balls, nested in blonde curls. You cup them and his shaft, pulling them free. He groans out a little breath as you touch him. Your fingers and eyes linger on his cock. His shaft is long. You had assumed so. It only made sense considering his long limbs and hands.  But his pretty cock, laced lightly in blue veins, was girthy too. He seemed to get harder under your touch.  
“Better,” he says, “Put it in your mouth,” he will brook no argument. 
Oh god, did he have any clue? Any idea at all how much you loved cock in your mouth? You don’t think you’ve ever said it outloud, at least not in his presence. 
You sink to your knees wetting your lips on the way. Immediately your tongue is out like a supplicant waiting for communion. 
He angles himself down and places his rosy pink tip on your tongue. Your eyes flutter in pleasure as you close over him. Your hand comes to his base to hold him. You slowly  begin to suck and move up and down on him.
“I didn’t say to move or suck.” he says, grabbing your head, “and hands off, you do only what I say, little Pearl.’ 
His phone goes off and he reaches for it. “Hmmm,” he says, reading the text. He spends the next few minutes on his phone, with you on your knees in front of him, his cock in your mouth, unmoving. Spit begins to collect, dribbling out the corners.  After all, he didn’t say you could swallow. 
Making you hold him in your mouth while he goes about dealing with whatever needs his attention on his phone is probably the most casually dominant thing he could do. You had no idea it would be such a damn turn on. 
He sneaks occasional peeks down at you and his cock twitches in your mouth. You look so fucking good warming his dick. It takes every ounce of his training not to thrust into your mouth.  When he finishes doing nothing more than just playing the daily wordle on his phone, he pets your head with one hand, thumbing at his phone with the other.
“What a good little gem you are,” he praises. “Now, you have three minutes to show me what you can do with your mouth.” He clicks the timer on his phone, slides his fingers to his base to hold himself steady, “Go.” 
With a little moan, you move your head back and forth, spreading all the spit on his cock. Your tongue rubs the underside of his head. Your hands stay at your sides, yearning for him to tell you what a good girl you are for him.  You create a little suction, twisting your head. He feels so luxurious in your mouth. When you hear his appreciative moans you start losing yourself, your hips start squirming, your pussy pulsing, seeking friction. 
The timer goes off and he pulls away, your tongue chases after him with a little whine. He leans down, bending low at the waist. 
“I didn’t know you were such a good cockwhore, you sweet little thing with your sweet little tongue, “ he murmurs shakily in your ear, “now kiss me with that beautiful dirty mouth before I cum in it.” 
He is insistent, kissing you hard. His tongue demands attention from your own.  It’s too short lived, you want more when he pulls away. Your eyes plead as he straightens. 
“So needy.” he smiles. “Get my clothes off first,  my sweet Pearl.” he stands with his hands out, toeing off his shoes. 
Oh lordy, you hadn’t realized just how much you wanted this, how much you had repressed your desire for him. You pull his jeans and underwear into a puddle at his feet. He steps out of them. You stand up catching the hem of his shirt and pulling it over his head. It takes all of 15 seconds to have him naked and towering in front of you. His hands run up and down your arms, thumbs grazing your tits. 
You are just staring at him, as though you’ve never seen him before. And in a way, you haven’t, not stripped, not naked. You have always known his calm, quiet charisma, but the change in him is uncanny. He is literally giving off preternatural god-like vibes. You seriously would not be surprised to see wings sprout from his back or a rim of light sparkling behind him.
He holds your head, leaning down to kiss you fiercely. Walking you backwards, he shoves the blanket covered ottoman up against the couch with one foot. When your  calves hit the low stool, one of his hands drops to your vulva. The pads of his long fingers running along your thankfully well trimmed muff. 
“So wet little Pearl,” he croons, rubbing his fingers together in front of your face, “is this all for me?” he says just before he licks a flat tongue up the seam of his fingers and sucks off his tips. 
You nod, your tongue is out, craving oral input.
“Oh you want some too?” his hand is back between your legs. He taps your thighs and you step apart automatically. His long fingers worm their way between your lips with little circles. Your eyes start to close. 
“No no, you look right here,” his hand tightens on your neck. Your eyes open to his blue orbs mesmerizing  you. 
His fingers sink into you with a squelch. He swirls his fingers in deep.
“Gah, oh, huh,’ you moan at him, eyes locked. 
A slow smile creeps up the corner  of his lips as he pulls out two slick fingers and offers them to your mouth. 
“Clean them off,” his voice is calm, with a hint of ‘or else’ in it. 
You suck his fingers, not knowing how hot tasting yourself would be.  Your hips pulse of their own accord. You don’t care how wanton you seem, you want him. 
“Lay back sweet thing,” he licks at his lips, he fucking wants you, to be burried inside you, to feel your hot wetness suck his cock in. 
You are on your back in a heartbeat with Austin kneeling between your legs. 
The absolute fuck-me look that Austin gives you as he presses your legs apart nearly breaks you. But when he yanks your ass forward with a growl,  you are intangibly wrecked. 
“Please fuck me, Austin. Oh god I want you,” you whimper unprompted. 
“Oh needy baby, Daddy’s got what you want, right here,” his tip is slipping up and down against your clit.
Your glutes are flexing, pressing your hips hungrily towards him. 
“Now, now, I want to watch as I push inside,” he presses your legs apart and spreads your labia with his fingers,
His pink head splits you. Stretches you. Its so good.
“Fuck yeah,” he groans, “that’s my good girl, taking me so well.” 
The way his long fingers hold your lips apart, the way his sizable cock is stretching you, the way he’s taking his time, going slow like there is not a thing else he has to do in the world. Holy fuck it’s good, better than good. 
“Take it all now, little Pearl,” he pushes deep. 
Austin’s cock slowly works your juicy pussy with little squelching sounds. Nothing but unrestrained noises of pleasure flow from you. 
“Your pretty little lips spreading around me is fucking glorious, and this,” he flicks your clit lightly with a finger, “is all swollen and sensitive.” 
Your body curls up towards him in pleasure, as you squeal. 
His warm, long fingered hand splays out on your chest, thumb under one breast. He leans towards you, lightly pinning you down as his hips fluidly surge forward and glide out in a slow, steady pace. 
The hand on your sternum is commanding, even though it’s only lightly placed. 
He is watching you carefully as he works in you,  watching for signs that your orgasm is building. Signs like your breath coming short, and the little red blotches creeping across your chest. Your repeated ‘ohs’ stretch into longer sounds.  Just when he sees authentic pleasure threaten to cross your face, he stops all his movement, with just his tip in. 
He wants to watch you become desperate and needy for him. 
What the fuck is he doing stopping just when it’s getting good? Maybe he’s trying not to cum? You open your eyes only to find that he is watching you intently. Not deep breathing and thinking of Rome or whatever. Clearly not in danger of losing control of himself. His eyebrow lifts as if to say “oh pet, your orgasm is mine for the giving”
Your forehead creases as you rock your hips back and forth. 
The wordless exchange peaks his resolve and he starts up his shallow pistoning inside you again. His fingers that were spreading you, now press your upper lips together. Fuck it feels good.
The pressure starts building again, your moans getting louder. His fingers start working back and forth, rolling your clit between your labia. It strikes you, just how fucking good Austin is with your clit, with his fingers. Your hips open more fully to him, rocking with his thrusts.  
Abruptly, he takes his hand and cock away like your pussy is a hot plate.  Your eyes fly open and you try to sit up. You are nearly incensed to find him slyly smiling down at you, chuckling. The pressure of his hand on your chest increases, holding you still, holding you down.
Austin watches your split second anger, then the emotions of frustration, surprise and burning desire flit across your face. It’s exactly what he wants, for you to ride that edge, to know that your pleasure belongs to him. He spreads your empty pussy and lets a long line of spit drip from his mouth. You gasp as it plops, cool onto your naked clit. 
It’s fucking hot.
He lines up his dick and begins again, this time going faster. His thumb works your lubed clit. Your eyes flutter closed. Your moans come back, the red reaches for your neck, your back starts to arch and fists clench. 
He stops. 
“God DAMMIT!” you curse, fuming. You were thirty seconds from creaming his cock. Not used to having your orgasm dangled in front of you like a carrot on a string, your hand instinctively dives for your clit. You’ll finish it, if he won’t. 
“Oh no you don’t,” his voice is calm as he captures both your wrists. His long fingers wrap around them and press back into your chest. You still feel wild, pent up energy making your hips buck, begging for friction against his cock. He jolts your joined hands into your chest, bringing you up short.
Your eyes widen in sudden surprise as you freeze, breath pushed from you.
“Now, now” he says in total control. 
It’s sexy as fuck.  
“Do you want more of this cock?” his blue eyes sparkle through his downward gaze as he  leans over you, holding you down. He knows exactly what he’s doing to you.
You blink at him, unbelievably turned on and unbelievably close to cumming hard. All you want is to carreen over the edge. 
“Do you?” His measured voice is like melted butter over you as he lets up his pressure on your torso.  
You just nod slowly, keeping eye contact. 
Austin hadn’t actually planned on dominating you like this right out of the gate. Having your responsive sexy body under him at last  and at his mercy was trippy as hell and he is digging deep to find restraint.
“Tell me you want it,”he breathes, struggling to keep himself still.
“I do,” you whisper. 
“Not like that,” he says disappointed, starting to pull out. He is shocked that he can actually feign withdrawal because he wants nothing more than to plow into you over and over until your hot, wet pussy sucks the cum from him. 
“Fuck, Austin,” you say with a clenched jaw. You stare up at him. He is frozen above you, on his knees between your legs with his cock tip barely touching your entrance. His abdomen taut, chest and shoulder muscles popping with definition as he holds himself over you.  He licks his lips, waiting. 
Oh fucking goddess in heaven, he is beyond hot, beyond sexy. He is a fucking masterpiece.  
“I want your cock, please, please.  I want it driving into me. Hard and fast until I can’t think straight. Please,  I want it so bad,” you are only a little surprised at how readily you beg for Austin’s cock. 
He had planned to make you wait, but the intensity of your plea is just too fucking much. With a low growl he plunges into you to the hilt. Deep and hard in, slow out. Over and over and over. Hard. Deep. Slow. Hard. Deep. Slow. He watches your eyes roll back into your head and your neck arch and your chest turn blotchy again. 
When he finally gives it to you, it’s like everything else pales in comparison. You may as well have never been fucked before. Your walls are clamping down on him with each stroke.  His cock fills you and you are lost in the pure bliss of being fucked so deep and so masterfully. Then his palm is shaking on your mons, the mound of his thumb pressing into your clit. Thirty seconds is all you need, maybe a minute. The red advances, along with your moans. He digs his thumb a little harder onto your clit. 
Filthy things start falling unbidden from your mouth. 
“Oh yes, don’t stop, please. Fuck my pussy!  Fuck my pussy! It’s so good. Fuhuhuhuhck ME!!!” you wail under him.  Your back arches, muscles clenching, hips shaking. 
Austin’s grip on your wrists tighten, using them as leverage to do your bidding. His hips snap deep, hard, fast; ramming into your now sodden slit.  
You are so damn gorgeous thrashing for him, coming completely undone. A woman cumming is the most erotic thing, and he loves to be up close and experiencing it with all his senses.
“Ohgod ‘stoomuch, no no!” you are shaking your head side to side under him, your climax overwhelming you. 
You are bucking against his grip, pushing him away and yet wanting him to never stop. Never stop pummeling your cunt, never stop making you cum on the end of his gorgeous dick. Waves of pleasure roll over you. This is what you didn’t know you were missing all this time. To be fucked so deeply and thoroughly from a man so beautiful and talented that you can’t remember your own name. Only his. 
“OH MY GOD, AU- AU- AUS-TIIIN!!!” 
Your screaming of his name is what finally does him in. He lets go of your hands and all of his own control, chasing his own pleasure now. His thrusts become erratic as his cum rises in his balls. He pushes deeper still with a death grip on your hips.  Driving, driving, driving into you. His orgasm comes in waves, spurt after spurt fountains inside you.  His head is bent forward over you, eyes screwed shut, a roar spilling from his open mouth. His spine jerks with each separate surge. 
He wants to collapse on your panting, arched form. Suddenly, and weirdly he feels too gentlemanly to do so, even though he is still balls deep in you. He slumps forward instead, sweaty forehead inches from where his hands held you down.
You wrap your arms around him in a sudden roll reversal, you pull him down, cradling his body to yours. 
As you recover breath, Austin’s dominant and your submissive energies drain slowly away. Realization starts to dawn on you of what you and Austin just did, what it might mean for your friendship. You refuse to let this feel awkward. You tighten your arms around him,
“I stand giddily corrected. Austin you can dominate me any old time,” you say softly.
“You have no idea how long I’ve wanted to do that, “ he says, “oh not the dom part per se, just have sex with you.”
“Probably about as long as I’ve wanted it.” you say casually. 
He lifts his head with a furrowed brow. “Really? Me?” 
“Yes, you” you shake your head at him, so humble and so fucking good at anything he sets his mind to. “And that was surely ‘a new possibility to our friendship’, ” you mimic his words and tone from earlier, smiling down at him.
65 notes · View notes
lulublack90 · 2 days
Text
Prompt 23 - Teacher AU
@wolfstarmicrofic April 23, word count 966
Sirius had been a teacher for quite a few years, and while he loved teaching the children, his true passion lay in his evening classes. Once a week, he gave up his time to teach adults who wanted to learn and, for some reason, and Sirius was only too willing to help them. 
The class was just beginning. This week, they’d be going over the short story he’d asked them all to read as homework and make a start on one of their own. He’d been told there would be a new student joining them that evening. It was very irregular. Normally, there was a start date that you had to begin at and not come halfway through the course. He’d been assured that the young man had been keeping up at home, but his ongoing health condition had made it impossible to attend the previous classes. 
Sirius sighed when he read the email from the course manager but vowed to help the chap catch up.
He cleared his throat, and his class went quiet. 
“Good evening, everyone. I hope you’re all doing well. Let’s begin with a show of hands. Who’s read the homework?” A sea of hands rose in front of him, and he couldn’t keep the beaming smile off his face. “Excellent! Now, who can tell me why Nellie did what she did?” He pointed at a woman in the back row. “Alice, you’re up.” The short woman checked her notes and began to speak. 
“She was tired of her life and wanted to be free of the chains that kept her there.” 
“Exactly.” He turned and wrote on the whiteboard. “She was a prisoner, and she longed to be free. So when the chance came, she took it. Now, when Nellie escapes, she rushes into the jungle in the dead of night with nothing but a small trunk filled with her few possessions. Was this a good idea or not?” He waited for a hand to go up. He could almost see their brains whirring. The classroom door opened, and a mousy-haired man popped his head around the door. Sirius stared at him, his eyes greedily taking in the slightly flustered handsome man. 
“Are you Mr Black?” He asked politely. 
“Yes, that’s me. How can I help you?” Sirius’s professional brain snapped back on. The man grinned, looking relieved. 
“I’m so sorry I’m late. I’ve ended up in the wrong room twice, and no one seemed to be able to point me in the right direction.” He pushed the door open and hobbled in. He was leaning heavily on a walking stick and took the only empty seat at the front of the class. 
“Right, where were we?” He asked, having completely forgotten. The new man raised his hand. “Yes—er?” Sirius nodded for him to talk. 
“Remus. Remus Lupin.” Remus helpfully supplied. 
“Thank you, Remus.”
“I think the risk of staying captive was far greater than whatever awaited her in the jungle. However, taking anything other than food and water was risky, but as we know, it worked out for her.” He answered Sirius’s question. 
“Yes, well done. I dare say even if she’d met a tiger while she fled, it would still be preferable to that iron chain, don’t you agree, even weighed down as she was.” His class all nodded at him. “So now free and on the run, no forced to perform, no matter how good she was at the tasks they set her, what do you think made her go the way she did?”
Remus raised his hand again, and Sirius signalled for him to continue. 
“She went home. There could have been something familiar about the surroundings, which is why she escaped when she did. But the inner child in me wants to say it was magic.” Remus grinned shyly at him, and Sirius had to chant to himself that he couldn’t date students no matter how ruggedly handsome they were or how intelligent they seemed to be. He had to swallow before he continued. 
“Yes, I think we all want to believe it was magic, as though she heard her mother calling out to her across the many miles she travelled.” He cleared the whiteboard now they were done with that and wrote up the next part of the lesson. “Okay, I want each of you to write your own short story. It can be about literally anything you want. Make a start now. Plan it out. I want them finished for next week, and I’ll go through them.” 
He gave them a few minutes to start their work and made his way around the class, answering any questions they had. Eventually, he had to talk to Remus. He couldn’t put it off any longer. “How’s it going?” He asked, making Remus jump. He’d been so focused on his work that he hadn’t noticed Sirius approach. 
“Oh-er, it’s going good. I think.” Remus rubbed the back of his neck nervously. Sirius peered down at the paper. 
“A werewolf and a man who can magically turn into a dog and an enchanted forest? Sounds thrilling. I can’t wait to read it.” Remus blushed hard. 
“It just popped into my head.” He admitted. 
“All the best ones do,” Sirius reassured him. “Oh, here, before I forget. Take this. It’s got all my information on it in case you can’t make it for whatever reason or need help throughout the week. I’ll do my best to accommodate you.” He handed Remus the little white card. Their fingers brushed as Remus took it, and Sirius felt a jolt of electricity shoot through him, stemming from where Remus’s fingers had been. They looked at each other wide-eyed and stunned. Well, crap, this was going to be harder than he thought.  
63 notes · View notes
urfavlarry · 2 days
Note
hihi! can i request a fic where the read is ben and aidens childhood friend and they both like the reader? like how would that go 🎀
Love triangle
Ben & Aiden x childhood friend!reader
warnings: swearing, bad grammar, brief mention of gagging
A/N: the texting part reminds me of a part from a book called call me by your name :0
。 ⋆ ⋆ ˚。⋆ ⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆ ⋆ ˚⋆⋆ 。
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
╰┈➤ ⋆。‧˚ʚ 🎧🛹 ɞ˚‧。⋆
Your childhood was a wild one. Of course it was! You had Aiden in your childhood! He wasn’t always like that, and you knew. The same with Ben. One lost his sparkle and the other gained it. You couldn’t lie if someone asked if you were some how involved in Aiden dyeing his hair. How could you not! He would be happy so you would do anything for your best friend. You and Aiden were there for Ben when he was going through tough time, you being the one that bought him his headphones to help him calm down. Of course they were there for you too! When you had family issues, personal issues, or even school issues! They were always there for you as if they were your unpaid therapist haha.
Your summers were never dull when with them, Ben being the only reasonable one and got you two out of trouble most of the time. He was the one that you always called at night when something was bothering you, knowing Aiden would probably already be sleeping, his snoring sounding like a damn alarm clock! Aiden however would be there for you during injuries and things like that. He was quite experienced with patching people up since he himself had to do it a lot on himself. Skateboarding injuries suck ass.
And here you were, looking at your phone, two different tabs opened. One with yours and Aidens chats and the other with yours and Bens. Both having the last message as;
— — — — — — — — — — — —
‘I love you Y/N.”
— — — — — — — — — — — —
What were you supposed to do? Yes you liked them but you weren’t sure if you could choose between them. You gagged at the thought of dating the both of them, thinking it would be weird since they are literally cousins. You shake off the thought, groaning and scream into your pillow. Watching the time go by, you get another text from Aiden and Ben;
— — — — — — — — — — — —
‘Hello? Y/N?? Are you there?’
‘Y/N?”
“HELLOOOO?”
— — — — — — — — — — — —
“Y/N everything okay?”
— — — — — — — — — — — —
You open the messages, trying to type out an answer but every single one felt like it wasn’t enough.
‘I need more time.”
You rewrote that to;
‘Could we talk about it in person?’
Nope! Rewriting that to;
‘Maybe we should just stay friends? No hard feelings right?’
FUCKING HELL Y/N, NO!!
‘I love you too, but I just can’t choose between you two, I love you and Ben so so much, you’re my best friends after all, why wouldn’t I? You have been here for me since we were 8, and I appreciate that but I don’t think I can love one and leave the other behind, I’m sorry.’
Yeah, that seems alright. You send the message and send the same thing to Ben, just rewriting his name to Aidens. They both must be so confused, I doubt they told each other about their feelings towards me, knowing the both of them a bit too well. You hear your phone blow up a bit, deciding to ignore them, you start to pack. Oh reader, nobody told you? You’re moving! Out of the state, well.. to a whole new continent! Isn’t that exciting? Well, it would be if this whole thing wasn’t going on. You’re leaving behind the people you love so much, how sad and American high school movie is that? Your mom yells for you to hurry, grabbing the photos and gifts from the group. You look at your now empty room, walking downstairs you send a quick; “Goodbye America<3” with a picture of your suitcase on snapchat and turn off your notifications. Everyone in the group knew, except Aiden and Ben. You walk downstairs, everything packed and ready. Your mom was waiting for you in front of the car, grabbing your things and puts them in the back of the car.
She smiles at you, hugging you and kisses your forehead. “You ready to go ducky?” She asks and you nod, smiling at her. She pats you on the back and you both get in the car. You get comfortable, knowing it would be a long car ride when you see Ben and Aiden sprinting out of their homes. Your dad drives off, Ben and Aiden chasing the car for what felt like hours yet it was only just a few seconds. They looked devastated, heart broken even. But it’s what the three of you needed; a fresh start.
。 ⋆ ⋆ ˚。⋆ ⋆ ˚。⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚。⋆ ⋆ ˚⋆⋆ 。
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
╰┈➤ ⋆。‧˚ʚ 🎧🛹 ɞ˚‧。⋆
84 notes · View notes
oreolemur · 20 hours
Text
Desperation- Choso Fanfic
Tumblr media
Receiving letters from Choso sent chills down your spine. He kept trying to confess his love for you after you helped him fight off his bullies. The man was obsessed with you, but you didn't want him. You sat in bed, reading the numerous letters he wrote to you. The letters detailed his feelings in great detail. The one from this morning mentioned how much he missed you and that he couldn't wait to see you after school. Another from a few days ago mentioned how he thought about you all the time and wanted to be with you forever. There were several more with similar sentiments from the past weeks. "Why does he keep writing to me?", you said to yourself. "Does he not get the message?”. You had told him several times that you didn't want to be with him, but he didn't seem to get it. You tried to be civil by still talking to him in school, but he took any small interaction as a sign that he still had a chance. You tossed all the letters in the trash and headed to bed, trying to forget about Choso and his weird obsession with you. You fell asleep quickly, hoping that tomorrow would go by without any drama from him. 
The next day as you were walking in the hallway, you saw Choso. "Oh no", you said. You tried to walk the other way, but he saw you before you could get the chance to avoid him. Choso spotted you immediately and started walking towards you. You tried to make a quick escape, but he had you cornered. He walked right up to you and said, "Hi." in a low tone. "H-hey", you said, trying not to sound weirded out by him. Choso's gaze was intense, making you feel uncomfortable. The way he stood so close to you was also unsettling. You tried to keep your tone friendly, even though your heart was beating fast. You hoped he couldn't hear how hard you were breathing. "So...I...ugh got your letters", you said. Choso nodded and said, "Yes, I wrote them for you." His voice was steady, but there was a hint of desperation in his tone. He continued, "I was just hoping that if I wrote enough letters, you might change your mind”.
You decided to confess to him again. "I appreciate you having feelings for me, but...I'm not interested in having a relationship". Choso's face fell as he heard your words. The sadness was clear on his face, but he tried not to show it too much. He nodded and said, "I understand. If you feel that way, I respect your decision." His voice had a slight crack, showing his disappointment. Despite the rejection, he kept his composure and said, "Is it okay if we still stay friends?". You nodded. "Of course. That's all I want". Choso gave a small smile at your response. Clearly, he had wanted a different outcome, but at least he could keep you in his life, even if only as a friend. He said, "Thank you for being honest with me. It means a lot." Despite the rejection, he was trying to stay positive and continue to talk to you. 
You were glad that Choso understood where you were coming from, but you couldn't shake this feeling that something bad was going to happen. There was something about Choso's reaction that made your gut instinct act up. You couldn't help but wonder if he truly accepted what you told him, or if he was just hiding his true feelings. Something inside you told you to be careful around him, but you couldn't exactly explain it. You decided to change the subject and hope your gut was wrong. After talking with him for a minute, you and Choso shared your goodbyes. "I'll see you around, ok", you said. Choso nodded and said, "Of course. See you around." Despite the awkward nature of the conversation, he appeared to be taking the rejection well and was being civil toward you. You couldn't help but feel relieved that it didn't end in a worse way. You were still a little uneasy around him, but you brushed it off and started walking away.
❤~Time Skip~❤
Later that night, Choso was in his dorm, doing his homework. His mind was still flooded with rejection and he didn't like it. The man took out his special book that was filled with photos of you. He had been taking pictures of you without your knowledge, and keeping them here. He stared at the pictures, the emotions from earlier flooding back to him. The rejection and how you didn't want to be with him hurt him, which only made him want you more. Choso continued to stare at the pictures, growing increasingly obsessed with you. His voice grew cold as he said, "She's mine and mine only." His obsession with you had grown stronger, and he wasn't going to let you slip away. He was determined to make you his, no matter the cost. 
Choso spent the rest of the night obsessing over you, planning ways to express to you how much you meant to him. He was no longer content to sit back and let you get away from him. He wanted to show you that he was serious about his feelings for you and wasn't going to let anything get in his way. "I have to have her", he said. "I have to make her love me". Choso continued to mutter to himself about how he needed to have you, how he needed to make you love him. You were all he could think about, and not having you would be unbearable for him. He was completely consumed by his obsession with you, and this thought made him grow even more determined to make you his. Choso decided that he needed to send one final letter to you, but this time it would be a warning rather than a confession of his feelings. This letter would make it clear to you how serious he is about you. 
Meanwhile, you spent the night in your dorm, getting ready for bed. "I'm glad he understands", you said to yourself. "Hopefully those creepy letters will stop now". You tried to put the whole situation out of your mind and hoped that he truly accepted your rejection. You were tired and just wanted to get some sleep, but something deep inside you told you to stay alert. "Why do I keep getting this strange feeling?". You tried to ignore the feeling, dismissing it as just your imagination running away with you. You crawled into bed, trying to get some rest, but the feeling continued to plague you. You tossed and turned, unable to relax or get comfortable. The feeling kept gnawing at you, making it hard to get comfortable or sleep. Just as you were about to head to bed, there was a loud knock at your door, which startled you. It was late in the night, and you weren't expecting anyone to visit you at this hour. You said, "Who is it?" but received no answer. You got off your bed, opening the door cautious as you wondered who could be there at this late hour. 
You cautiously opened the door and saw no one there. To your surprise, there was a letter on the ground that caught your attention. You saw that it had your name written on it and picked it up carefully, hoping it wasn't another love letter. You examined the outside of the envelope, then decided to open it. “I can't keep ignoring my feelings for you. I can't just accept the way things are and move on. I love you too much to just let you go. If you won't be with me willingly, then I'll have to make you mine. I know the best way to make you love me, and I'm going to use it. I'll see you soon ❤”. You were filled with fear as you read the letter. Choso's words sounded like a threat, and it caused your heart to drop. You realized that he wasn't going to accept rejection, and he was going to use some sort of method to make you his. The "best way" and "make you love me" part of the sentence was particularly eerie.
It almost sounded like he was going to use force or something sinister to get your affection. Your heart was beating fast, and you felt an icy chill go down your spine. You rip up the letter in a fit of frustration and sorrow. You couldn't believe that a simple rejection would cause someone to become so obsessed or even resort to threats. You didn't know what would motivate Choso to send a letter like that, but it didn't matter. All you could think about was his words, and how he planned to make you love him. You felt a surge of fear as you thought about what his "method" for making you love him might be.
You made sure to avoid Choso for the next few days, not wanting to interact with him. You didn't see him during your shared classes and decided that him not being there was a good thing. Your mind was still focused on that ominous letter, and you were anxious about what he might do if he saw you again. You tried to stay on your guard and told yourself to take precautions when going to your dorm or anywhere else where you might bump into him.  You went about your daily routine for the next two weeks and didn't see Choso once. Even though you were glad that he wasn't around, you couldn't help but feel that it was strange that you hadn't seen him at all. You had shared classes with him and would normally see him pretty often, so it felt odd that he was nowhere to be found. You kept wondering where he was, but you were also relieved that you didn't have to deal with his obsession for the time being. 
❤~That Night~❤
You were walking back to your dorm one night, hoping that the walk would be uneventful. You felt uneasy for some reason, and a sense that you were being followed suddenly crept over you. You stopped, looking behind you only to see no one there. No one was visible that you could see, but something in you told you otherwise. You got an uneasy feeling, like someone was watching you. "I'm probably just tired", you said, nervously. You tried to convince yourself that it was just your imagination playing tricks on you, but the feeling of being watched refused to subside. You felt tense and nervous, as if someone was hiding somewhere. You couldn't see anyone directly watching you, but you had a strong sense that someone or something was following you. The sense of paranoia grew stronger, and you found yourself looking over your shoulder and around you constantly. 
Just as you were about to open the door to your dorm, someone ran up behind you, putting a cloth over your mouth and nose. The sudden attack took you by surprise, and you struggled to breathe as you were forcefully pulled into a nearby alleyway. Your attacker was quick and stealthy, and you couldn't see who it was. All you could do was struggle and try to breath while the cloth was over your mouth. You continued to struggle and try to get away from your attacker as the cloth on your face made it harder and harder to breathe. You could feel your strength beginning to wane as the oxygen deprivation took its toll on you. After you start to pass out, your vision begins to get blurry and your body becomes weak as you struggle to remain conscious. Choso looks down at your unconscious body with a grin on his face. He looks completely unhinged and crazed, his mind consumed by his obsession with you. He drags your body back to his dorm, where he plans to carry out his plan. 
You slowly begin to regain consciousness. You're not sure how much time has passed, but you eventually begin to gain clarity. Your head is pounding and your vision is still blurry. Your body feels weak, and you're not sure where you are. You struggle to move and open your eyes, your breathing labored. As you come to your senses, the first thing you see is Choso standing in front of you. "Ch-Choso?", you said, weakly. Choso glances down at you as he hears your weak voice, a sinister grin spreading across his face. He looks down at you with cold eyes as he leans in closer, his face just inches from yours. "You're awake," he says in a calm but cold tone. Choso walks to his door and locks it, seemingly not caring that he just locked you in with him. The only sound in the room is you panting and his breathing. He steps closer to you, his body looming and threatening. "I'm going to make you mine," he says in a low voice, his eyes filled with obsession and insanity.
"What are you talking about?", you questioned. Choso continues to stand over you, his eyes fixed on yours. "I've decided that if you won't be my girlfriend willingly, I'm going to have to do this the hard way." He says calmly, not seeming angry or agitated in the slightest. He leans down even closer to you until your heads are mere inches apart. "I'm going to make you love me”. You looked at him confused. "You can't just force me to love you". Choso ignores your words and leans even closer to you until his face is just inches from yours. "Of course, I can't. But there are ways to make people feel things they otherwise wouldn't”. The way he said those last words made it sound like a threat. "It's simple, really. I just need to put you through an experience that will break you down and make you love me”. 
Choso's face remained calm and unExpressionate as he took off his clothes, revealing his muscular body. His body looked incredibly fit and toned, something he's probably been doing to impress you. Instead of making you feel attracted, the sight only made you feel even more scared. He ignored your words as he looked down at you with cold eyes. He continued to strip, stripping his pants and his top. As you desperately tried to scoot away, he grabbed your ankle and pulled you close to him. You found yourself unable to move and were helplessly trapped as he pulled you closer to him. He said nothing and just looked at you, a hint of madness in his gaze. He positioned himself, between your legs, reaching up your skirt. “Please, Choso”, you whined. 
He pulled and tugged on your panties, ripping them off. The cold air in his room hit your bare pussy. You tried to close your legs, but Choso stood firm between them. His lower half moved closer too, making his cock hit your cunt. He rubbed his dick against you, feeling how warm and wet you were. “Choso”, you whine again. “Please don’t do this. You don’t have to do this”. He pushed you further onto the bed, getting on top of you. “You know, y/n…”, he paused, shoving himself in you. You gasped at the sudden thrust, feeling your cervix breaking. Blood trickled down your thighs as Choso proceeded to fuck you. “I read your diary”. You tried to listen to him, but the pain kept distracting you. “I read all about how you fantasize about being raped and toyed around with”, he continued. “If that’s something you like…”, he grunted. “I can give that to you”. 
He threw your leg over his shoulder, fucking your tight cunt harder. Your body went limp as you laid underneath Choso. You felt disgusted. The pain you first felt started to turn into pleasure. “Why am I starting to like this?”, you asked yourself. “All that stuff I wrote was a lie. A mere thought I had when I was depressed”. Choso’s dick slid in and out of you at a slow but medium pace. His dick was huge, stretching your walls open with each hard thrust. His face was red and his breath was heavy. He enjoyed the power he had over you as he forced you to take him. “I know you like this”, he whispered. He leaned into you, grabbing your throat. He slightly choked you as he quickened his pace. “I love you so much, y/n”, he said in your ear. “I don’t care how much I hurt you, as long as you love me that’s all that matters”. He fucked you faster and harder, soon dropping his warm cum inside you. He kept himself in you for a hot minute, making sure that every drop spilled into your womb. “I hate you”, you said under your breath. Choso didn’t care. He knew that this was only the beginning. 
❤~One month later~❤
It had been a month since that dreadful night had happened. Choso’s attempt at making you love him didn’t work, but he still never gave up on you. He kept a watchful eye on you, meeting up with you every chance he got, which was every day. You couldn’t tell your friends about you and Choso’s forced relationship. You knew it wouldn’t end well. “I love you”, Choso said, laying on top of you. He just got done fucking you. You looked up at the ceiling with soulless eyes. He kissed your neck, marking your soft flesh. “Your skin is so soft”, he complimented. He looked into your eyes as he grabbed your chin, forcing you to look at him. “Till death do us part, my love”, he smiled. 
29 notes · View notes
micaluvssoccer · 2 days
Text
Tumblr media
Chapter two
Micaella’s POV
The next morning I wake up and I take a shower and I put on a sweatshirt and sweatpants and I grab my phone and dorm keys and I head to the gym. As I walk into the gym I see Nika inside. I smile at her and I say good morning Nika and I check the time to make sure that I won’t be late. She looks up and says good Morning Micaella how did you sleep last night. I smile at her and I say I slept pretty well. I was wondering if you could help me find the soccer coaches office. She smiles and says yes of course follow me and then I follow beside her and she shows me where the office is and she says I’ll stay out here for you. I smile and say thank you. She smiles and says no problem and then I walk inside and I see the coach Michelle Rodriguez and I say hi I’m micaella I’m here to sign my contract with you. She stands up and says oh yes and how was the trip up here. I smile and I say I got here last night. It was pretty good and I shook her hand and she said "So I’ve heard that you were the captain of your old team, mind being captain again? I smile and say thank you and she smiles and says you are a great player. I wouldn't be surprised if you went pro. I smile and say that’s the goal, well one of them I also want to be a marine biologist and end poaching.
She says omg really that is so really cool. I blush and say yeah that’s the goal and then I read my contract and I signed it and I ask her if dating teammates is off limits but is dating other people who are in different sports okay? She says yeah that is totally fine and I smile softly thinking about Nika and I snap out of it and I say when will I take pictures? She says right after we are done here. I smile and say it sounds good and we finish signing. We then walk over so I can take the official pictures. We both smile in the pictures and then the manager hands me my new Adidas practice bag and I quickly change into my game kit with the number 2 and my last name. Nika watches me from the back of the room. I then take pictures with the soccer ball and I smile widely. After the pictures are over i get changed then i walk back over to nika.
I smile at her and I say hey you sorry if you had other plans I didn’t realize that it would be so long. She says hey it's quite alright i really enjoyed it. I smile at her and I say let me just put my bag in my dorm. She says perfect let's go then and I follow her back to the dorms and I say that I’m the new captain of the soccer team. She smiles and says that's so awesome congratulations. I smile and say thank you and I open the door to my dorm and I set my bag down and then I say no practice today? She says no not for a few more months. I say ah lucky we start next week. She says wow that’s kinda crazy and I say I know right but at least no classes yet. She says i am so glad and I say the same and then I say i should really get some groceries to make dinner tonight. She asks what are you gonna make. I say maybe pasta would you like to stay for dinner tonight? She says I would love that thank you. I smile and say perfect I’m just going to grab my purse and keys then we can go to the store. She smiles and says okay and I smile and grab my purse and get my keys and I put my purse handle around my shoulder. Nika waits by my door all patiently for me and then I walk to the door and we walk out to my car. Nika opens my driver's side door for me. I smile with a little giggle and I say thank you and then I get in and I put my seat belt on and then I reach across to open her door. She gets in and puts her seat belt on and then I do the directions and I hand her the aux cord and my phone. She then turns on some music and I start driving to the store and we sing along to the music. She says you have a great taste in music.
I smile and say thank you and then I continue to drive to the grocery store and once we get there I park. We both then get out of the car and I turn my car off and we go inside. Nika pushes the cart for me and I get steak, potatoes, hotdogs and beans, pasta, pancake mix and everything else that I need. Nika walks beside me all content and I then grab some cereal and snacks and then Nika sees her teammates and says oh dear my teammates are here. I say okay where and she points over at her teammates and Paige sees her and kk says yooooo Nika and I can’t help but giggle. She looks all embarrassed and I smile at her and say go see them I’m almost done. She says okay but I will be back shortly. I smile and say take your time I’m not going anywhere. She says okay and she walks away to her teammates and I watch her walk away. She looks back at me and she smiles and then she winks. I blush softly and I continue to shop around.
Her teammates all ask who she was standing next to. Nika smiles and says my next door neighbor she transferred from Florida to play for our soccer team. They all say okay she's cute. Nika says yeah she is and then she looks for me. She spots me standing near the produce section. I then grab some more stuff that I need and I look over to see a picnic basket and blankets and I get those too. Nika just smiles and she shakes her head at me. I then look around for picnic food and I get those from the deli and some desserts and a bouquet of red roses. Paige looks over and says ooh i wonder who the red roses are for hmmm. Nika blushes and says oh shush and then I get the flowers single roses for her and her teammates. I then pay for everything and then I walk over to the girls and I hand them each a red rose and I give Nika a bouquet of red roses.
They all say thank you and they blush and nika gives me a kiss on the cheek. I smile and say you're very welcome girls. Would you all like to go on a picnic and of course I’ll make dinner later on. They all say omg yes we would love to. I smile and I say well I paid already so let’s head back so I can put the groceries I don’t need in the refrigerator and I have three seats in the back if anyone wants to join us. They all said okay and I smiled and walked out towards my car. Nika helps me put all the bags in the trunk and three of the girls all climb in the back seat. Nika opens my door and I smile at her and I get in. the girls in the back all aww at us and I smile and reach over to get her door open and then I put my seatbelt on.
20 notes · View notes
writingsfromhome · 1 day
Text
Echoes of the Night we Met
Request: Would you consider writing something based on one of these songs? „I’m not yours” Angus & Julia Stone or „The night we met” Lord Huron
A/N: I took Lord Huron’s song as a looooose inspo and just went with what came…hope it came out ok. Feel free to request any others :)
————————————————
Harry:
I've been searching for a trail to follow again.
I move my can from one hand to the other, the drink dangling from the bridge railing. Along the railing flakes of green paint give way to pockets of rust. I try not to read too much into that. Instead I focus on the soothing quality of the river below, always moving forward, always soldiering on.
YN liked coming here to think a lot when we were kids. That’s how I first noticed her, the girl with the curtain of hair hiding her face from passerbys. She’s look down into the river like it was whispering ancient words to her, mesmerized and connected. I wonder what she thought about all the time.
One day I asked. I remember the first night we met. It was just after 8, the sun was just about done setting. Summer was slipping away from us and we were both facing the start of a new school year.
“Hi,” I’d started off rough. She’d barely even glanced up. “Penny for your thoughts?”
That had gotten her attention. She had looked up through wisps of her hair and then turned to me fully. I didn’t know if she knew who I was. We’d grown up in the same neighbourhood all our lives but she didn’t go to the same public school I went to.
“A penny used to be worth a lot more,” she had said and I remember her brows raised slightly like she was surprised at what came out of her mouth.
“What?” I’d laughed, charmed by this awkward girl.
She shook her head, a shy smile brightening her face despite the oncoming dark. “A penny used to be like a lot more money so that phrase meant our thoughts were just as valuable. But now a penny barely means anything so…what does that say about thoughts in the 21st century.”
She was a nerd, and somehow the revelation of that made me like her even more.
“Can I summarize that answer in 140 characters? My thoughts are in tweets.” I tried to joke.
She snorted and covered her face. “That was kinda lame.”
“You laughed,” I had pointed out. “Plus you’re the one who just met me and delivered a lecture on-
“I get it,” she cut me off. “I was just caught off guard.”
“Do you usually deliver facts when you’re caught off guard?” I decided to join her, overlooking the water. Our elbows had stay a foot apart.
“Yes,” she said with humour.
“So if an intruder came into your house-“
“I would disarm them with a fact.”
It had take me a second to get the joke before I laughed. She had hid hers behind her hand.
“You have a nice smile,” I told her.
“Oh.” She had grow serious and avoided my gaze, staring out at the river.
“You can take the compliment.”
“I know,” she cleared her throat. “Thanks.”
“I’m Harry,” I finally introduced myself.
“I know.” She said again. “You volunteered at the community centre earlier this summer. The reading club?”
“Were you there?” I thought I would remember a face like hers.
“Not for that,” she had left it at that.
“What year are you in?” I had asked.
We began to talk and she began to relax. Slowly she faced me again, answered my questions and laughed at my jokes. I felt on top of the world. We barely register how dark it had gotten, the lights in the part casting us in shadows.
My breath catches in my throat as the memories wash over me as they usually did. It was torture, coming here to this bridge after a few weeks.
Y/N moved on. Moved out of this town and made a life out of travelling. I stayed and made a life here. On my bitterest nights I have to avoid thinking that I was left behind.
Not that it was her fault. We were both to blame how the relationship ended. But I didn’t understand why it still affected me this much a decade later.
I wish I had one night with her. Or go back to the night we met. If I could go back I’d tell myself what I should’ve done when I had her. And if that doesn’t work, then save myself the heartbreak and advise not to ride along.
Is it better to love and be left behind or never to have loved at all, the age old question circles my mind as it always did when I fell into this particular pit of despair.
10 fucking years. When was I going to get over her. I try to shut out the painful images that always came.
The softness of her, how loud her laugh could be despite her shy smile. The way she smelled when I nestled my face in the specific spot on her neck. Her eyes, the ones that I watched growing wearier throughout our relationship.
I replay our final moments together, the blow of every word that should’ve been left unsaid, the pain of tallying every unkept promise—the biggest being staying together, forever. Everything suffocates me.
I thought I could live a life without her but she lingered like a ghost with nowhere to pass over. Even if I managed to get over her, move on, she was like a thread that ran through me; a constant memory.
I’m snapped out of my thoughts as the bridge creaks with the weight of another person. I look up at the approaching figure and my chest squeezes tight at what I see. Who I see.
You:
The bridge stood as a silent witness to the passage of time, once gleaming in its steel it had been oxidized by rain and snow, worn down by wind and ice. Its timeworn pieces clang with every footstep that’s ever walked across, the secrets whispered by the rushing river below staying hidden from passerbys.
I listened to the secrets. As a teen this is where I came to get away from the small bungalow I lived in with my 3 siblings and parents. This is what kept me sane when times got tough at home, always leaning over the edge and letting the rushing of the river below whisper that things would get better.
It’s where I met Harry. Both of us naïve and 16. I wonder if he heard the same secrets I did.
For years, the bridge held our memories, preserving the echoes of a night long past. Just like this bridge we’d been worn down and away. Life circumstances, time, and heartbreak.
The air crackles as I step onto the surface of the bridge. He’s there, his perfect silhouette embodying the shadow of how I remembered us. How had so much time passed?
In the stillness of the night I walk towards him and hope I wasn’t making another mistake.
Harry:
Even in the dim light she was as beautiful as the first day I met her. Her hair was shorter, straightened and lighter than I remember.
“YN?” I had to be hallucinating.
“Harry, hey.” Her voice bristles slightly. That’s how I know she’s actually here, and not a part of my imagination.
“How…”
“My brother,” she goes to lean on the bridge rail but changes her mind last minute, wrapping her arm around her waist instead.
YN’s brother and I had become friends—which was weird since he was always YN’s younger brother. But he got a teaching job at the same school a few years back and he had remembered me. We got along well.
I had just left the pub with her brother. But what was she doing here? In town?
“You’re in town.” I state lamely.
“Yeah,” she turns away, out to the river. “Helping my parents with something.”
Her parents were selling their childhood home, I knew that from her brother. I wonder if she knows I know.
“It’s good to see you,” I say the obvious but truthful statement.
“Yeah,” she glances at me. “How are you?”
Now I look away, unsure how to answer. “Good. You?”
“Fine,” she says with a wry smile. We knew the other way lying.
“Really?”
“I’m here in this godforsaken town so yeah, great.”
It’s the first cut tonight; apparently being here was rock bottom for her.
“Still no room for second chances hey?”
She doesn’t respond but she stands taller. Annoyed—I could tell from her body language.
“Same old y/n,” I whisper under my breath. Fuck. I didn’t want to slip back into this version of me but I wasn’t expecting such a biting cold from this woman. I thought we could be pleasant before descending into old habits.
“Same old Harry.” She cocks a brow. “I shouldn’t have come here.”
“Y/N,” I sigh. I used to have all of her. I had to be better. “I’m sorry.”
Her mouth makes an ‘o’ and her eyes soften. She doesn’t say anything.
“I’m sorry,” I say again, hoping she somehow understands I meant it about more than just now. “I don’t understand why you’re here though. I was just thinking about…”
“I was in town. I was here earlier in the day actually. Hadn’t visited the bridge in a while, used to come here nearly every bloody day.”
“I know,” I chuckle. She was attached to it.
“My brother mentioned you when he got back from the pub. Said something about you being in your sad hour—you liked going to this park during it. He probably doesn’t know why but…”
“But then why come? Knowing I’m here?”
She shrugs, her hands coming up only to fall hard at her sides. “I don’t know Harry. I didn’t realize I’d come here to get the second-degree.”
“I was thinking about you.” I will her to look at me, it aches to look at her. She looks older in the same way I probably did to her. More mature. She looks beautiful. And so far away. “About us. I know it’s been a decade but some night I can’t get us out of my head. I did so many wrong things Y/N. I swear I’d do anything just to go back to the night we met. Before I had all of you.”
She sucks in a breath. Still doesn’t look at me.
I touch her elbow, plead inside my head for her to look my way.
“I needed you to be angry or apathetic. I thought I’d come here and see you never changed, and feel better about leaving us. Leaving this town.”
She finally looks at me, her eyes fill with tears and I feel myself crumble. I don’t know how I was going to wake up tomorrow morning after seeing her face like this. I couldn’t let her go. Somehow fate brought us back here.
You:
The night we first met, I had been stewing in anger staring at the rushing river and trying to stay out as late as possible. I didn’t want to go home. To my reality.
Dad had lost his job earlier this year and his new job paid less. They were pulling my brothers and I out of private school and into public. I had cried and begged—I had a year left couldn’t I just finish it off?
But they had been resolute. And I had been angry and heartbroken.
Until Harry had approached me. I knew him from seeing him around the neighbourhood. I was relieved when he said he didn’t notice me at the community centre where my brothers and I sometimes went for their free breakfasts. It had been a real struggle that year.
I had noticed him, he was really attractive and confident, but he’d also been really sweet with the people he was volunteering with. Especially the kids.
I guess he would be at my new school. Maybe I’d make a friend in him.
I hadn’t expected to fall for him after exchanging a few words. He hadn’t been weirded out by my awkward small talk or moody vibe. He had just talked to me, asked me questions about myself, and we’d laughed a lot. That’s what I remember.
But five years of friendship to lovers came to an explosive end. For ten years I ran away. Tonight I return to the night we met.
I wanted to stay on my high horse, absolutely sure that I made the right decision not forgiving him and moving away.
Now I don’t know anything.
Mom and dad were selling my childhood home, any ties I had to this place were unravelling, and now even the person I needed to stay the villain was apologizing.
“You travel a lot,” Harry touches my elbow lightly. I know he’s not ignoring what I said, just giving me a way to talk around it until I can talk through it. I forgot the little ways he could be kind. It tears a hole right through me.
“Yeah,” I had started working for a travel magazine a decade ago and then made it my own brand on social media. I got paid to travel which was a dream. And yet, it always carried an emptiness—like I was running away from a debt I never paid. “Do what you love right?”
“Yeah.” Harry had gone into teaching, he’d stayed in town, born and raised. It had surprised me finding out. “I can’t say I love teaching, but it gets me up in the morning.”
“I heard the kids adore you,” my brother had kept me updated on Harry when I asked. I think my brother loved him too—he definitely idolized him.
“Sometimes,” he smiles like he’s embarrassed but I know he’s not.
“It’s been ten years,” I whisper. Why was he still not over us? Why did it make me feel awful.
“I think I felt every year,” he says.
Me too.
“Wish I could rewind, go back to the night we met.” He says.
“So you could warn yourself?” I half tease.
“No. Y/n,” he rolls his eyes. “Just to remember what it felt like to-to…not have to worry about a million decisions, not have to worry about money and what’s for dinner and whether your car’s about to kick the bucket or whether you’ve got a serious vitamin c deficiency or it’s depression. Just…just to go back and remember what it felt like to…meet a cute girl in the park and wonder what she’s thinking about.”
“That cute girl was angry,” I remind him.
That had come out later, as we talked into the night. In the cloak of darkness when he’d expressed surprise that I was enrolling in his school and I had said some bitter response, he’s prodded in all the soft spots. Before I knew it I was crying in front of the very attractive guy. It was humiliating.
But he’d surprised me, with a gentle hand on my arm—a question that I’d responded with by tucking myself into his arms. It was weirdly not weird.
“I remember.”
“The girl’s still pretty angry,” I say quietly.
My mum and dad were selling the home. The place I thought I’d always get to call home no matter how many countries I went to and how many beds I slept in. I always thought the room down the hall would always be mine.
“Want to talk about it?” Harry asks.
“How?” I look at him. “How can you want to stand here and listen to me be angry? After everything.”
Harry sighs. It’s loaded. “Y/N I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. Ten bloody years have gone by, many relationships and so many fucking new memories and yet I’m still haunted by the ghost of you. And I push it away and pretend I’m okay. But I’m not.”
“We were both so angry at the end,” I ignore everything he just said to say something else. Or maybe to respond to him basically confessing that he missed me. I was scared.
“I tried to make you something you weren’t,” Harry admits and hearing him say it out loud even ten years later burns. Like the flaking paint on this forsaken bridge, I’m rusty on the inside.
“And I was angry at the world but I took it out on you.” I reply with the same vulnerability. He deserved it after I came here wearing body armour.
He moves an inch closer to me and my body feels like it leans in like an automatic response.
“Why did you run so far?” He asks, it’s barely a whisper.
I feel the tears threatening to pour out but I hold them back. “Why didn’t you come looking for me?”
“I was mad,” his hand reaches out but before it can brush mine it drops. My heart drops with it. “And then I thought we were better apart. But really I was just scared.”
“Scared?” I was too.
“I had all of you and then most of you, some of you and then none of you. I didn’t think it could go the other way.”
It couldn’t. I think about the ring in my pocket, the one I took off when I left my parents’ front door to walk here.
It was a 3 year relationship begging to take the first step. When the proposal came I had cried with tears of joy.
“I don’t think it can,” I say and I feel a tear slide down my cheek. I rub it away.
He nods in defeat. “I just wanted to talk to you. Say sorry and be sure there’s nothing to go back to.”
“The way I treated you I…I wish I did things differently Harry. And I’m sorry. But I think there’s too much between us to go back to.”
“Yeah well,” he scratches the back of his head. “At least I know now.”
I want to take his face in my hands and kiss him, feel his familiar hands work down my body and hold me close. I wanted all of him, or some of him. I couldn’t. I could only have none of him.
Harry:
It hurts, being rejected. But now I know.
“Thank you YN,” I say honestly.
“For what?” She brushes away another tear. I wish I could do that for her.
“Coming here tonight? Closure?”
“Thanks for showing me people change,” YN says after some silence, her voice breaks half-way and she turns away.
Something else I’d be haunted by.
“Y/N,” I tug her arm and she unspools in my arms. She fits exactly as I remember, a whirlwind of emotions threaten to overwhelm me as her scent fills my head. She felt like a dream, slipping away while I still held her.
Still, I hold on tight, desperate to replace every y/n-related ache with this feeling right here. But just like sand in my fingers, it’s impossible to cling onto.
Y/N pulls away slowly and I feel like the river’s gathered up a big enough tide to swallow me whole. I want her to stay, to give me another chance, to put aside our history and see who we were now.
But I stay silent, the words caught in my throat and held back; she’d just reject me again. As much as I needed to, we couldn’t go back.
“I think I should go,” she whispers. I should ask her to stay, to maybe get breakfast tomorrow, to see her one last time.
Instead I nod, I just fucking nod.
She turns and every step she takes there’s a part of me that leaves with her.
When I can no longer see her I turn back to the river and cry one of my own.
I wasn’t haunted by the ghost of her, but by the ghost of what could’ve been. The echoes of the night we met bounce off the walls of my head and I scream into the night. It feels good, but the shadow of us stays in the farthest corner of my heart.
“It’s no fair,” I whisper to the river.
The river streams on, a low shushing sound muffled by the night.
Maybe, I think, Y/N would visit here once more—maybe soon. Maybe she’d look down into the water like she always did and when she listened for the river’s secrets, maybe it would tell her mine.
“I still love her,” I confess to the river.
But the river only moves forward.
18 notes · View notes
louieshalo · 1 month
Text
demiromantic asexual riz gukgak save me… save me demi/ace riz who can’t distinguish his romantic feelings for fabian from his platonic ones
Tumblr media
119 notes · View notes
lisbonsteresa · 1 year
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
i'm going to SCREAM
#tm#you don't get how UNHINGED this makes me it's SO#like he's been out all day trying to track down this missing kid (as part of her case too; to give her another avenue against volker)#and they have their little catch up and at first he's concerned (she's been at this all day and now into the night too#and he GETS it - in a way maybe other people wouldn't - but he doesn't want her to burn herself out; he wants her to be careful#maybe he's about to tell her a version of 'get some sleep')#but then she talks about amanda and it makes me NUTS because she does NOT ask for his help#she doesn't ask him to stay; to read the files with her; to 'burn the midnight oil' with her#she's just...stating her case; explaining why this means so much to her; and he listens; he takes it in; and he makes the choice to help#to sit in this with her and to help her work through it#and i just -- neither of them will ask the other for help (yes i know she did at the end of the last episode the context is different ok)#but they're both so quietly (and sometimes not so quietly) desperate to help each other it makes me sick#it's so interesting to see how they deal with this as the show goes on....idk how to explain it but like#when jane needs help he closes himself off; he keeps secrets and he schemes and he lies ('let me help you' 'you're sweet')#because he's trying to keep the people he cares about - the people he never planned on caring about as much as he does - safe#even as he shares more with lisbon (and sometimes the rest of the team) he still doesn't share everything#because that puts them at risk#and that's what lisbon used to do to - in the earlier seasons she put up walls when she felt vulnerable; and she still does in some cases#but with this case especially she's much more accepting of help - she relies on her team (not that she doesn't usually)#and she's practically an open book to jane - in this scene most of all - she lets herself be more vulnerable#(and open to suggestions/ideas she might otherwise scoff at or reject)#idk idk it's very interesting but this scene makes me so wacky there's something so soft and tender and understanding about it#the way there's no spoken acknowledgement - no 'i'll help' or 'thank you' - just the silent understanding that they're in this together#because they're partners#(also the way he picks at the rest of her food - the 'done with this?' the only thing they say - and the framing through the window#is still somehow very domestic it's like my perfect scene)#spinning my wheels hard i'm not thinking clearly i just love everything about it
37 notes · View notes
foxcassius · 2 years
Text
as i look at job listings here in korea, i cant help but still dream of that private lesson life. like, every job here will still expect you to teach 6 classes a day 5 days a week, for like a maximum wage of 2.4 million won per month. i could make twice that teaching that many classes in a private lesson setting, and i could easily make the SAME wage and just work less (ideal scenario)
#last night jiwon asked me like a million (imo unfair) questions about america and its society and why it succeeded#(unfair bc i just genuinely cant give definitive answers aside from 'it succeeded economically thanks to slavery')#and i was like 'you ask me sometimes why i dont want to move back to america and there are so many reasons and its hard to put into words'#'but one of them is that the work culture is so gross to be in and people still feel trapped in their jobs and there's no freedom to it'#and he was like 'korea is the same way it's just that i'm a specialist and you are foreigner who speaks english as a mother tongue'#'so i am inherently privileged out of genuine poverty by way of my degree and you are as well by way of being the class of foreign worker#you are. so korea has the same kind of trap for ''lower class'' people when it comes to work its just that you arent seeing it due to#your own status and my status as the main korean national whose life you are privvy to'#and i was like yes. i am aware of this. i am perfectly aware of how much poverty there is in korea and that not everyone lives as we do.#and i'm also perfectly aware of the fact that i would lose visa status and be sent back to my home country before i had any chance to#experience korean poverty. it sometimes feels like when he asks me why i dont want to go back to america he forces me to state One (1)#reason why and then takes that one reason and is like 'korea is like that too' which for starters I Know. because he refuses to acknowledge#this but korea is heavily controlled and influenced by the usa im not gonna get into that right now but I Know the similarities in many way#s between the usa and korea. secondly there are Many reasons why i wont be going back to the usa not the least of which is that#jiwon and i intend to get married and he doesnt intend to leave korea so its all a moot point anyway and idk why he keeps bringing it up#he wants to stay in korea and i wouldnt choose to move back to america so idk why he keeps like forcing me to explain myself on reason at a#time and like turn it around is trying to make me want to leave like. let it rest king i am so tired of talking about american politics#at 12 am especially bc sometimes he wants to have an argument abt it and im like Neither Of Us Is Educated Enough To Have This Conversation#i have my own lived experiences and a small amount of specific research. he has whatever they teach in school here abt america + some#internet readings. neither of us is qualified to sit and talk about this#it just feels like sometimes i'll be like 'america is a suffocating capitalist hellscape where kids get shot at school' and he's like#'well korea is also bad' and im like yeah no shit everywhere is bad everywhere is a capitalist hellscape the us has its hands in korea's#government and economy. but at least here i have a job with a decent salary and You so.#anyway. long rambling tags over. <3#t
6 notes · View notes
sumire-bride · 2 years
Text
(( I just finished Shuu's MB route and I am DEVASTATED ))
(( There's a boy who's the son of the owner of a flower shop in the after story and goes up to Yui to offer her a job there cuz girly was like "I need to provide for my bf and me" like the girl boss she is, and he FALLS IN LOVE WITH HER and he does his lil confession later he's all nervous and not only does he get rejected but the rejection made me want to CRY, Shuu comes outta no where to pick up Yui tells him to back off and shi AND KISSES HER IN FRONT OF HIM😭 , LIKE BRO EVEN SAID IN HIS CONFESSION "I bet I could make you very happy!" WHICH HE COULD HAVE NO HE WOULD HAVE BUT.. Shuu. FUCKING SHUU. ))
(( #justiceforflowershopboy ))
3 notes · View notes
sinner-as-saint · 2 months
Text
stuck with you
Bucky x Reader au
Run-through: Alone, cold, and stranded in the middle of a small town on top of a mountain. Not the most ideal situation to be in when the weather starts getting bad. No motels or inns have room for you so the locals suggest you reach out to a man named Bucky Barnes for shelter. Apparently, Bucky is known to always help stranded people, or lost hikers. No matter how weird it feels to drive up to a stranger’s house and ask for help, you have on other choice but to do just that. The plan was simple: stay with the strange, kind man for a couple of days until the snowstorm passes. But then you meet him and you find yourself unable to stick to the plan. 
Themes: age gap (reader is in her twenties, Bucky is in his early forties), strangers-to-lovers ish, smut, slight degrading kink, fluff
Tumblr media
It felt like the start of a horror movie. 
Unknown town, unknown people. You cursed yourself as you walked out of yet another motel who had no room left for you. 
What the hell were you thinking? After uni, you thought travelling the world on your own would help you with learning the right lessons, having the right experiences, and all that before you joined the family business and began working with your parents for the rest of your life. 
Instead of having fun though, here you were. Stuck on top of an icy mountain, in a small town, and nowhere to sleep for the night. With the snowstorm approaching, you had to find shelter quickly. But none of these motels or inns were free. Every hiker, skier, and tourist had already booked ahead of you apparently. 
“Uh, miss?” A voice called from behind you right as you were about to step outside into the cold evening. 
You turned to look and it was the owner of the motel. The same man who had just turned you down because he had no space left to accommodate you. He looked apologetic as he approached you. 
“Hi.” You said, then patted your pockets quickly, “Did I forget anything on the counter?” 
“No.” The man smiled and shook his head. “Look, I’m sorry you can’t stay. But snowstorms in this area can be dangerous and deadly, and you wouldn’t survive the night if you slept in your car.” He pointed at the rented jeep you had parked right outside the motel. “But there’s a man who can help. His name’s Bucky. Bucky Barnes. He often helps out stranded hikers and stuff, and I already called him and asked if he had room and he said yes.” 
The motel owner proceeded to give you details about Bucky and how to get to his house. From what you’d just learnt, Bucky Barnes was a business mogul who preferred seclusion. He was wealthy, and lived alone in his luxurious cabin that, rumour has it, he built himself. He was in his early forties and had people running his businesses for him all over the world. He moved to this small town after living in lavish cities his entire life. He owned acres upon acres of land, so he was also the local lumberjack and spent his time manually taking down trees whenever anyone needed wood. 
“Don’t worry, miss,” The motel owner reassured you, with a kind smile. “Mr. Barnes is a nice guy. Everyone around here knows him. Just follow the directions I gave you and you’ll find his house not too far from here. It’s a wooden behemoth right on the edge of the forest.” 
When you got back in your car, the first thing you did was google the man really quickly. And the headlines, as you scrolled and read them, made your eyes widen a little each time. They were all basically just about what the motel owner already told you. But you needed to make sure it was all real. 
It was. Bucky Barnes was indeed a filthy rich business mogul who chose to come live all the way up here to get away from busy cities and journalists who always followed him around for quotes to put into their articles. 
And then, you began searching for pictures of this man. Your heart skipped a beat upon finding them. Pictures of him at fancy dinner parties, galas, charity events. Pictures of him shaking hands and clinking glasses with famous faces. Pictures of him on business magazine covers.
Pretty blue eyes, handsome face, and a kind smile. You noted the crinkles by his eyes whenever he smiled or laughed in pictures. Whenever he was photographed with a group of people, everyone seemed charmed by him. He seemed tall too. Oh well, safe to say the man was drop dead gorgeous. 
What if he was a serial killer and the people in this town directed victims to his house like he was some kind of twisted leader of this town?
You cringed at the exaggerated thought, shaking your head. 
Usually you weren’t one to trust strangers quickly but it was getting darker, the wind was beginning to howl and the cold was making you shiver even beneath all the layers you were wearing. The snowstorm was expected to last at least three days, so it was either trust a stranger for a few days or die. 
— 
You stopped your car in front of what the motel owner called a ‘wooden behemoth right on the edge of the forest’. And he was right. 
The luxurious log home was situated higher up on the mountain, looking over the small town. Surrounded by towering trees, mainly pine, and the area around the house was foggier than the rest of the town. It would’ve seemed eerie if it weren’t for the warm, golden lights coming from inside the house. 
The house was indeed massive, with intricate carvings on the huge front doors. The roof was covered with dark, polished slate, and what gave the home a more contemporary touch were the large, floor-to-ceiling windows. It looked like the perfect place for someone who sought seclusion and comfort. 
Or a murderer, your brain added. You hissed at the thought, shoving it away as you got out of your jeep. It was beginning to drizzle, the wind howling louder than earlier. You walked up the front porch and knocked on the large doors. 
Before you could check out the porch, you heard loud footsteps approaching. Then, the front door opened. And on the other side stood a handsome man, slightly different from how he looked in the photographs you’d found online, but just as gorgeous. Well, the photographs were all taken from years ago so it made sense that he looked different. Bucky Barnes hadn’t been photographed ever since he moved here, according to the articles, and it was a shame because he was truly a work of art. 
“Hey,” He said with a deep, confident voice. “You must be the girl I just received a call about from the motel.” He opened the door wider. And for a couple of seconds, you didn’t move. 
You were frozen in place. He was… too pretty. That same handsome face as in the photographs, except he had more facial hair now. And longer hair. So long in fact that he had to put it all up in a messy bun on top of his head. A few strands escaped the bun and fell on either side of his face, making him look beautiful in a rugged way. 
You couldn’t help but let your eyes wander for just a second. He was just as tall as you imagine, but slightly more muscular than he seemed in the pictures. The white t-shirt he was wearing clung to him like a second skin, the jeans clung to his thighs in a way that should be illegal. 
You quickly looked up and cleared your throat before you got caught ogling. “Um, hi Mr. Barnes. I’m sorry for–,” 
He cut you off politely, “There’s no need to apologise,” He signalled for you to come in. And as you walked into his home he said, “And please, call me Bucky.” 
You smiled at him as you stood near the entrance, waiting for him to shut the door. When he turned to you, he asked for your name and asked what you were doing here. While you answered, he led you further into the magnificent house. 
If you thought it was beautiful from the outside, the interior was absolutely breathtaking. Spacious, with high ceilings. Most things inside were wooden, except for the rugs and the plush sofas. It was an open concept, and you could see the more farm-style kitchen from the living room area and it was just as pretty as the rest of the house. The more you looked around, the more you fell in love with the interior. Elegant curved staircase which led upstairs, massive fireplace, accents of stone and metals everywhere. It looked like a lot of thought went into building this home. 
“This looks like a dream.” You commented, standing in the middle of the living room and taking it all in. The owner looks like a dream too. You sighed at the sound of your inner thoughts. It was true. 
Bucky smiled, looking proud. “It took some years to build but…” He sighed, “It’s worth it.” 
You smiled at him, noticing the crinkles by his eyes as he smiled. Fuck, this man was beautiful. 
“Give me your keys, I’ll bring your bags in, then I can show you to your room.” He extended his hand out, waiting for you to drop your keys into his palm. 
“Oh.” Your face got all hot when you realised you’d just walked into his home empty handed. You’d forgotten your bags in the jeep. “I can go get it, it’s–,” 
“No, I’ll get it,” He cut you off again, stepped closer and took the keys from your hand. “It’s getting bad out there.” Then he walked away. 
And you shamelessly watched him leave. His back muscles moved and shifted under the tight shirt as he walked and you felt a shiver travel down your spine. Think about how those warm, hard muscles would feel under your fingertips… 
Shit. This man was being kind to you and here you were being a pervert. 
Bucky brought your bags in, all four of them. Carried them through the front door like they weren’t heavy at all. Well, he cuts down trees for fun so maybe he’s used to carrying heavier things. 
He showed you to one of the many guest bedrooms he had. And the room was just as beautiful and perfect as the rest of the home. King-sized bed, large chest drawer, private bathroom which was fully stocked with toiletries. Large windows, and a small balcony which overlooked the dense forest outside. 
“Well then, I’ll leave you to unpack and make yourself comfortable. Dinner will be ready in an hour or so. See you downstairs.” He left with yet another smile which made your heart skip a beat. 
You found yourself making your way downstairs after a long, warm shower. You wanted to unpack after your shower but then the smell of dinner cooking forced you out of the room. You followed the delicious scent of what seemed like pasta sauce, sniffing the air quietly until you made your way into the gorgeous kitchen. With an even more gorgeous man in it. 
“There you are,” Bucky smiled at you as you approached the large kitchen island which was also the dining table. “Everything okay with your room?” He asked, stirring some kind of sauce in a pan before resuming chopping some other thing. He looked so comfortable in his kitchen, it was endearing. 
“Yeah, everything’s good.” You answered, lingering by the kitchen counter awkwardly, “You need help with something?” 
“Sure, if you want.” Bucky nodded and pointed at the other side of the kitchen with his knife, and said, “Can you be a doll and grab us a red wine from the cellar?” 
You froze for a quick second at the sound of ‘doll’. It was sweet, but the way it sounded from his deep, smooth voice… you cleared your throat again before your thoughts got inappropriate, turning around and heading for the cellar because of course he had a wine cellar. 
After grabbing what you hoped was a nice wine, you made your way back to the kitchen and found Bucky plating pasta into two plates. He had a slight frown on his face as he focused on the plates. If there was anything you had noticed about Bucky it was that he was very detail oriented. 
Bucky’s frown disappeared the moment he looked up from the plates and saw you standing there. “Hope you like pasta and cheese.” He winked with a maddeningly handsome smile. 
“I do.” You smiled back, ignoring the butterflies in your stomach as you handed him the wax sealed bottle of wine. For a brief moment, his hand brushed against yours and you could’ve sworn it felt like you’d been electrocuted. 
A strange shiver danced down your spine as you took a seat at the table and watched Bucky break the seal, uncork the bottle and pour it into two glasses before pouring the rest into a large decanter. 
All that wood chopping did him good. The man was muscular in all the right places. But his hands… oh his hands. Large, veiny. Imagine those hands all over– 
“So, tell me about yourself.” He said, taking a seat across from you. “And what are you doing on this icy mountain?” 
The conversation flowed perfectly. You told Bucky about how you were travelling to all the places you wanted to see before you moved back home, and he told you all about his life here. He said he liked the peace and quiet. Even the snowstorms, he grew to love them. 
By the time your plates and the decanter were empty, the two of you were laughing and exchanging life stories like you were old friends catching up. 
“So wait,” You chuckled, “You built this entire place out of spite?” 
Bucky nodded, laughing as well. “Well, I guess. My friend Sam came to visit when I told him I bought some land out here and he said ‘Well what are you gonna do here, Buck? You can’t just build a house in the middle of nowhere and become a lumberjack providing wood to the locals.’ and I thought, ‘Wait, that’s not a bad idea’, then I did exactly what Sam said.” 
You laughed, the wine made everything funnier. Bucky’s cheeks were now pink, his lips stained due to the wine and you couldn’t look away from him. Fuck, he really was gorgeous. He must have changed before dinner because he was no longer wearing that tight white shirt. He was wearing loose, beige coloured loungewear and looked just as mouth-watering. His hair was just as messy, but made him look effortlessly handsome. 
You eye-fucked him so more before realising that he was checking you out too, and neither of you had said a word for the past minute or two. But it wasn’t awkward. His blue eyes stared into yours and you were suddenly too aware of the thick tension in the air. 
The way he licked his lips, the way he toyed with the stem of his wine glass, the way his hand–
Bucky cleared his throat and looked away first. You tried to blink away the tension too but it remained. Then Bucky asked, “So, you have a boyfriend or something waiting for you at home?” He gave you a playful smirk. 
Oh? 
You shook your head, “Nope. What about you? You came all the way here to live in seclusion, are you running from an ex or something?” 
Bucky chuckled, shaking his head. “No, nothing like that.” 
That tension came back again, filling the air like smoke. You couldn’t ignore it. Neither could he, given how he fidgeted in his seat. 
This is wrong. Isn’t it? 
He was being kind enough to offer you shelter and you were being inappropriate. So before you did something you might regret, you said, “It’s late. I should head to bed. I drove all day and…” You trailed off, looking away and avoiding his eyes. 
“Yeah, yeah of course.” He said quickly, getting up from his seat. He went to reach for your plate but you grabbed it first. 
“Oh I’ll load up the dishwasher, don’t worry.” You moved before he could stop you, grabbing your plate and then his. Then the wine glasses and everything else. 
You could feel Bucky’s eyes on you as you carefully arranged everything in the rack before turning it on. You washed your hands, and wiped it on a tea towel while turning to leave but Bucky’s heated stare stopped you. 
There he was, leaning against the kitchen island and looking even more yummy than the dinner he made. You were glad you had the tea towel in your hands otherwise you wouldn’t know what to do. 
Luckily Bucky spoke up first, “If I had known you were coming I would’ve made dessert.” 
Such a simple sentence yet it sounded like he’d whispered some dirty, filthy secret in your ear the way your body came alive. You refrained from clenching your thighs together. His voice was lower, deeper but just as smooth and it was driving you crazy just imagining how this man must sound in bed. 
And now you were jealous of all the people who had had the chance of hearing what he sounded like, moaning and grunting, whispering out of breath… fuck. 
“Uh…” You struggled to find your words, now that the image of him naked in bed wouldn’t leave your head, “That’s alright. I don’t have much of a sweet tooth anyway.” 
You didn’t know when you moved, but you found yourself standing closer to Bucky now. He turned to face you completely and there were mere inches between your bodies. You felt… hot. Maybe it was the wine, but you were almost certain it was because of the way Bucky looked at you. Like he’d devour you if he could. You had sensed tension between you and other people before, but it had never been this strong. 
“Shame,” He muttered under his breath, his hand coming up to gently touch your face. “I happen to like something sweet before bed.” His voice dropped to a whisper. 
All you could focus on was the way he was touching your face. Gently, like you were made of glass. His hand was warm, but rough. You let out a shaky breath as you wondered how his rough hands would feel all over you– 
“Go to bed.” He said in a voice that made you tingle all over. He didn’t let go of your face. His thumb caressing your cheek, and his eyes staring into your soul. 
You blinked, wondering if you misheard. “What?” You asked softly, leaning into his touch subtly, obviously not wanting to move. 
“Go to bed, doll.” He repeated, still not letting go of your face. 
You frowned slightly, “But–,” 
He cut you off by placing a gentle finger over your lips. His eyes couldn’t look away from where his finger touched your mouth. He leaned in a little, then said, “We shouldn’t.” 
“Why not?” You asked, lips brushing against his finger as you spoke. 
He gave you a soft smile and said, “I should be a good host, not seduce you.” 
You shrugged, “Well I’m nice and seduced, now what do we do?” 
He chuckled, leaning in until his nose brushed against the side of your neck. His simple touches were driving you crazy. 
“You know what happens when there’s a snowstorm in this town, doll? It lasts for days,” He whispered, lazily kissing your neck. “And by the time that’s over, the roads are completely blocked. And this is a small town so it takes a while before the roads are functional again.” 
Your heart fluttered, your body felt too hot and yet you shivered. You gently pulled away to look at him. “So you’re saying I’m stuck with you here for days?” You couldn’t help the smirk on your face. 
He caught the hopeful tone in your voice. Bucky nodded. “And if I touch you right now,” He whispered, cupping your face in his large, rough hands, “I’m not sure I’ll let you leave my bed at all for the next coming days.” 
It was risky because as beautiful as he was, you didn’t know Bucky. But you had never wanted someone this much before. This felt like a new kind of longing and need. You didn’t care what was right, ethical, or risky. “Then don’t.” 
That did it. 
Bucky stopped thinking why he shouldn’t and instead pressed his lips to yours, kissing you like he was tasting his favourite dessert. His tongue easing your own as he tasted you leisurely. “We’re sure about this?” He asked, breathlessly. 
“Yes,” You whispered against his mouth, gasping as his hands trailed up and down your body, sliding under your sweater and fondling your breasts. “We are.” 
Bucky smiled into the kiss, then spoke again. “Aren’t I too old for you, doll?” 
You chuckled, your own hands wandering and sliding up and down his muscular back. You wanted nothing more than to just take off that comfy hoodie he was wearing. “Oh, what’s a decade or two?” You murmured. 
Bucky’s hands dropped down to your waist, caressing your skin, fingers threatening to slip past the waistband of your sweatpants. You had to bite your lip to keep yourself from moaning too loudly. The storm was picking up outside and it would surely drown out all your cries, not that there were any neighbours to hear to begin with. 
“Will you be good for me?” He whispered, kissing down your face as his fingers slowly dipped into your sweatpants. One hand held you at the waist while the other inched dangerously close to where you craved him the most. 
His touch, his words, it was all too much. “I’ll be good,” You replied, your hands sliding under his hoodie to finally touch him, exploring and curious. His body was incredible to the touch, hard muscles and warm skin. 
He finally slipped his hand into your underwear, hissing as he found you dripping wet. He chuckled against your skin as he kissed and licked your throat, “How long have you been this wet, doll?” He asked, sounding cocky. 
You gasped when you felt him sliding a finger inside you, gently. “Since you opened the front door.” You answered honestly. 
Bucky laughed, his warm breath tickling your ear. “That long, huh? I’m sorry.” He cooed, “Let me take care of it for you.” 
You couldn’t help the moan that escaped your mouth when you felt him slide another finger inside you, fucking you slowly with both now. Bucky kissed your neck, your face, your mouth. Licking and biting your skin as he pleased while he finger-fucked you until you were right on the edge. 
“Get up here.” He murmured, pulling his fingers and hand away and pointed at the kitchen island. 
You didn’t move immediately. Probably because your brain was all foggy from his kisses and his touch that it took a second for you to register and process his words. 
Bucky smirked and repeated. “Come on. Take your clothes off and get up here.” 
You did as he asked. Taking off your sweater and sweatpants, followed by your underwear and revealing your bare body. Bucky took a second, letting his fingers trail up and down your stomach and chest before he pointed at the island again. 
“Up.” 
You hopped on the edge with a giggle, hissing upon feeling the cold surface against your warm skin. Once sat on the edge, you wrapped your legs around him, pulling him closer. Bucky smiled as he placed his hands on you again, your arms wrapping around his neck as you stared into his ocean blue eyes. 
“Such a pretty doll,” He whispered, placing his hands on your thighs and spreading them further apart. He looked down at your wet folds, mindlessly dragging a finger up and down your slit, making you shiver all over again. “Now, lie down.” He said. 
You wasted no time. You unwrapped your arms from around him and carefully laid down flat on your back, hissing at the cold again. 
Bucky’s eyes trailed up and down your body, his hands caressing your skin. From your thighs, to your hips, to your breasts where he pinched your nipples, making you cry out again. 
“Can I taste you, doll?” He asked, pulling your legs up to the edge and spreading your thighs as far apart as they would go. The island was high enough where he only had to bend down for his mouth to touch your heated skin. Lips brushing against your lower abdomen, he asked again, “Can I?” 
Your brain was a mess. Yet you managed to mumble a firm, “Yes…” 
With his mouth mere inches away from your throbbing clit, he said, “Keep your legs up just like that for me, okay?”
You nodded, looking down in between your legs as he leaned in and pressed his mouth against your wetness. He looked up immediately, holding your stare as he slid his tongue against, the roughness of his beard against your softness was driving you insane. 
You held yourself up on your elbows as you watched him eat you out. The warmth of his mouth, the slow caress of his hands against your inner thighs, the intense look in his eyes as he tasted you. It made you feel like you were floating. 
It was too much, it was not enough. You wanted him, you wanted more. 
“You taste sweeter than any dessert, doll.” He whispered, kissing around your wet clit before sucking on it hard enough to make you come, your back arched off the surface, riding his face as you cried out in pleasure. “But it’s not enough.” He admitted, pulling away and kissing his way up your body. “Is it?” 
You barely caught your breath, your heart racing as you laid there in front of him. 
“Get down, and bend over for me.” He spoke in that enchanting voice of his which put you under his spell so easily. 
You moved immediately this time. He was still fully dressed and you didn’t have a single article of clothing on and somehow that made you feel hotter. 
You bent over the island in front of him, your front pressed against the edge. You placed your hands down and turned to look at him over your shoulder. You watched how he grabbed your hips and spread your legs, leaning closer to kiss up your spine. 
“So beautiful,” He whispered against the back of your neck. “Now, are you gonna let me fuck you? Hmm? Are you gonna let me put both of us out of our misery, doll?” 
“Yes.” 
“Good.” 
He pulled his hands away from you for a moment, lowering his trousers enough to free his cock. You wished you could see it properly. You wished you could kneel down in front of him and take him into your mouth and– 
You gasped out loud when you felt the tip of his hard, warm cock pressing against you. Nothing mattered in that moment, not when he was gently rubbing his cock up and down your wet slit, parting your folds. 
You squirmed against the hard surface under you, pushing back into him in need. “Please…” You whispered, desperate for him. You had never been this needy for a man before. 
You braced yourself for his thrust, knowing it was coming. 
Slowly, Bucky slid inside you, filling you up and stretching you out as he did. He let out a sigh of pleasure once he was seated deep inside you, gripping on your hips tightly as he gave you both a moment to get used to it. 
You felt so full, like you’ve never been before. So full, you could barely form a coherent thought. All you knew was you wanted more. 
You let out a quiet moan as he started fucking you gently. 
“You feel so fucking good,” He hissed, “So warm and tight for me.” Bucky whispered, fucking into you with a pace that made you want to scream and shout because it felt so good. 
Each time he filled you up, the tip of his cock brushed against your most sensitive spot and you moaned as your walls clenched around him. 
“Poor little doll,” He cooed, “This will be your new routine for the next few days now. Just getting fucked, and caressed all the time while the storm rages on outside.” 
His thrusts got harder. Your moans got louder. His words made you clench around him even more. 
“Look at you,” He growled. “Pretty girl letting a older man she barely knows fuck her like she’s a needy little whore.” His voice was deeper, and as menacing as his words were his touch was just as soft and careful. His fingers circled your clit gently while he pounded into you from behind. “Would you bend over for any man, doll? Hmm? Whoever offered you shelter from the storm, is this how you’d repay him? By letting him fuck your needy little cunt?” 
You couldn’t help but cry out, moaning in pleasure as his words took you higher. You did have a little bit of a degrading kink, who didn’t? But never had anyone ever hit the spot like Bucky did. And given how your wetness dripped down his fingers, he could tell. 
Bucky chuckled darkly. “Does that turn you on, doll? Knowing that I can selfishly take from you now that you’re stuck here with me?” His other hand came up to grab you by the back of your neck as he whispered into your ear, fucking into you hard enough that your body slammed into the kitchen island with each thrust. “Does it turn you on knowing you’ll have to be my little slut for the next few days? That you’ll have to spread those legs for me and let me fuck you whenever I want to?” 
“Yes…” You whimpered as he pounded deeper into you. You didn’t want him to stop. Ever. 
He hissed into your ear, “Is that what you are now? My little slut?” He chuckled, rolling his hips in a way that had you whimpering and squirming in pleasure beneath him. “Well, what a perfect way of repaying me for my kindness, hmm?” 
“Please, Bucky…” You whimpered. 
Bucky hummed, kissing your warm skin, “I know, pretty girl. I know, it feels good, doesn’t it?” 
His words made you feel feverish, and wild. Lust-drunk more than ever. You moaned as he sped up again, a familiar warmth taking over you, and a pressure building in between your hips. 
You whined, “I’m gonna come.” You cried, and you were pretty sure you had tears streaming down your face. 
“Come for me, then. Come all over my cock, doll.” 
Your brain was a foggy mess after that. You came hard though, clenching around him violently as you did. 
“Fuck… look at you,” He whispered, his cock pounding harder into you until he came as well, spilling all over your lower back as he panted in exhaustion. “You okay, doll?” 
You nodded slowly, pressing your forehead down against the cool surface and catching your breath. 
“Come on,” His voice was softer now as he pulled you up and held you against him. Your back to his chest as he wrapped his arms around you, nuzzling your neck and leaving soft kisses all over your neck and the side of your face. “Let’s get you in bed, yeah?” 
You asked in a shaky voice, “And then can we fuck again?” 
Bucky chuckled, hugging you tightly before saying, “Yes we can, pretty girl.”
2K notes · View notes
jj-one · 1 month
Text
STRAY KIDS + WHEN YOU’RE BUSY AND THEY CRAVE YOUR ATTENTION !
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
this is smut, do not interact if under 18
pairing: skz x f!reader genre/tags: smut, fluff, nipple play, fingering, exhibitionism, voyeurism, marking, sexting, sending nudes, piv, unprotected sex (don't be silly, wrap ur willy), masturbation, oral (f receiving), dry humping, pussy slapping, multiple orgasms, spanking, there is probably more but i’m too lazy to write them all words: 4.4k
[note] if you remember seeing this before yes i’m the original author i didn’t plagiarize lol, i made a new blog and was formerly known as @milkychae but deleted a while ago. i’ll be reposting all my old deleted fics and using this as an archive !
Tumblr media
BANG CHAN. It was finals week, aka your personal hell. You were always super nervous about tests and if you didn’t score over an 80% that may as well be a failure to you. You sighed as you opened yet another textbook to read, your dickhead professor thought it would be a good idea to pile more homework on top of the fact knowing you all needed to study. Your major was biochemical engineering so you shouldn’t have been too shocked by all this intense workload. As you were sitting on the bed you heard a noise come from the door, looking to the left of you to see Chan coming inside. You don’t really put much thought into it though since you see him literally everyday and you were just really focused on studying right now. That’s when Chan starts to come up behind you, rubbing your shoulders and planting a kiss to your cheek.
“Hiii y/n, I’m back!” He says cheerfully, “I couldn’t wait to see you baby,” he proceeds to try and pry the textbook out of your hands so you can give him your full, undivided attention but you pull it back.
“Sorry babe but I really, really need to study right now.” You tell him with an exhausted look on your face. You’ve been studying for only 2 and a half hours but it feels like the entire day.
Chan looks at you and puts his arm around you, “You look so tired sweetie, why don’t you let me give you a massage?” He asks, already starting by wrapping his hands back on your shoulders.
You loved this man dearly, he just came back home from an 8 hour shift at work but is still offering to give you massages and help you out when you’re stressed. You want to tell him no and that you seriously need to focus back on studying but the intrusive thoughts were slowly winning. Ultimately you gave in to Chan’s desires and he gave you a gentle massage. The massage started off pure at first with no intention of going any further but then his hands slipped a little too far and came in contact with your nipple. He noticed you weren’t wearing a bra underneath so he slips his hand through the opening of your t-shirt, light moans were now leaving your mouth from his touch.
“I’ve been thinking about fucking you all day babe,” Chan softly whispers while pinching your nipples, bringing his other hand down to your thigh and gently caressing it. Chan has always been good at being a distraction for you and his cock is definitely what you need instead of reading about the Principles and Techniques of Molecular Physics.
LEE KNOW. Saturday nights were the best, you had no work and got to do whatever you wanted for the whole day. You weren’t much of an outgoing kind of person so you chose to stay in and have your boyfriend Minho come over and be lazy with you. You were wrapped up in your cozy sherpa blanket watching your favorite kdrama season finale, you and Minho both loved kdramas but you got way too into them. Your eyes have been glued to the show since Minho got there and you only spoke about three sentences to him. He’s sitting on the couch next to you and he’s not as remotely interested in the show as you are, he keeps looking around the room and sneaking glances at you from time to time.
He can’t stop noticing how cute you look today, you were wearing very light makeup and had messy hair. He thought you looked so adorable in your current state, just in awe of your natural beauty. He wraps his arm tightly around you and tries to give you a kiss, but you quickly pull away from him so you can focus back on the TV, not trying to miss anything. Minho gets visibly upset by this, he wants to give you his affection yet you’re currently denying it. He tries one more time to kiss you but you continue to keep pulling away to watch the show. That’s when he decides he’s had enough and grabs the remote to turn off the TV, causing you to get frustrated with him.
“What the hell Minho?!” You say in confusion, you were getting so close to knowing who the girl’s father finally was.
He doesn’t say anything, instead he just starts roughly kissing you, pushing you down on the couch and hovering over your body. He pulls away leaving you breathless, then proceeds to nibble on your earlobe, dragging his tongue further down to lightly suck on your neck, touching a certain spot that makes you inhale sharply. He brings one of his hands to your stomach, rubbing it gently. Beginning to toy with the hem of your sweatpants and wants nothing more than for them to be off.
He was almost going to give in to that idea but a new one came to mind, an even more sinister thought. He grins as he continues rubbing down your thigh, you want him to wipe that smirk off his face so badly because you have no idea what he’s up to. Wondering what he could possibly be thinking about right now. Minho brings his fingers to your clothed heat, sliding them inside the sweatpants and starts rubbing your clit through your panties. You moan for him as you close your eyes, feeling the friction. You buck your hips in the air so you can feel more of him, but Minho grips your hips and holds them firmly in place.
“No, stop. No moving ‘til I say so,” Minho says sternly, giving your clothed pussy a little slap as he looks at you. “Since you’re so willing to ignore me, I get to tell you what to do from now on.”
CHANGBIN. You’ve been cleaning the entire house preparing for your parents to come over for dinner. You wanted to make sure that everything was perfectly spotless and the amount of cleaning you did today could account for your whole lifetime. You were cleaning the stove and just as you were about to grab another clean sponge you see Changbin with a whole box full of donuts from Krispy Kreme.
“How’s it goin’ babe?” Changbin asks while setting the donuts onto the table, he sees you wearing an apron and giant yellow gloves, “looks like you’ve been doing some serious, hard labor!”
“I’ve been cleaning for 5 hours now..” You say with an exhausted look on your face, “I haven’t even finished cleaning the stove yet.”
“Who cares about the stove y/n,” Changbin says, chuckling at your frustration about needing everything to be neat and tidy.
“I’m serious Binnie, I need to clean everything and make sure it’s all perfect!” You tell him while pouting.
“Why don’t you take a break babe.” He suggests out of concern, grabbing your hands to take your gloves off and sets them aside. He slowly brings your body up against the wall behind you, kissing you passionately. He must have been wanting you all day by the way he was hungrily kissing you, the man was sucking on your face for dear life, exploring the depths of your mouth as both your tongues were intertwined. He takes off your apron and grips his hands around your waist while your leg wraps around him, he held you so securely.
As things got more heated, and all your clothes were off, he aligned himself inside you. Your hands were snaked around his neck as you desperately move your hips to feel his cock, feeling every bit of his thrusts in you. Letting out a high-pitched moan as you grab a fistful of his hair and scream his name. Your legs grew weak with each and every stroke Changbin gives you, feeling like you’re going to faint. He continues pounding into you like no tomorrow and you hold tightly onto his shoulders for support. His skin was sticky and sweaty from all the work he’s putting into fucking you, his face looked super focused as he was hitting all the right spots. He was fucking all your stress away at this point and you were feeling so good. You feel yourself coming to your peak as he thrusts into your dripping heat, you’re seeing stars at this point. The harder his strokes were getting, the faster you were to reaching your climax.
“Mmm…gonna cum!” You cry out in pleasure, slowly losing your grip on him as you slip from his grasp. Changbin swiftly picks you up and pins you harder into the wall, making sure you don’t go anywhere by fully pinning his body up against yours. You feel so connected to each other in this very moment as you’re both about to cum, both letting out a string of moans in unison. You both reach your highs together, dizzy as your orgasm washes over you, feeling his cum leaking out of your cunt and dripping down to your leg. You just spent the whole day cleaning and now you have to get cleaned up before your parents come in approximately 30 minutes.
HYUNJIN. It was a long day at work, you were about 6 hours in and you already wanted to end it all. You work at a clothing store and on this particular day for some reason everyone and their mom wanted to come shopping. You’ve been working the register nonstop and you had yet to take a break, you were so busy that you forgot to even take one. You asked one of your coworkers if they could cover for you while you go on lunch and they said yes. You were so excited to finally be able to get to sit down and eat. As you sat in the break room you checked your phone for any missed messages, you see that you have a bunch of missed texts from the new guy you’re seeing. Hyunjin’s name is plastered on your phone and you check the messages straight away, eyes growing wide at what was shown before you. Hyunjin sent you a string of messages:
‘Hey y/n, what’s up?’ [1:15 pm]
‘Imyyy’ [1:25 pm]
‘Wyd? Are you at work?’ [1:42 pm]
‘Yea you’re prob at work :P’ [2:26 pm]
‘I’m a little horny lol’ [2:41 pm]
‘I want youuuu’ [3:02 pm]
He then proceeds to send you a couple shirtless pics of him in bed and a short video of him stroking his erect cock through his boxers. You quickly look around to see if anyone would be able to notice and you don’t see anyone else in the break room besides you. That’s when you open the video fully to see the rest, quickly get turned on as your wetness is only growing. You ran to the bathroom so you can send a photo back, snapping a quick pic of your boobs under your shirt and telling him how wet that video made you at work. You love that he now comes to you for when he feels needy, you like that he craves your attention while you’re gone. He sends you another message saying how much badly he wants to fuck you and he can’t to pick you up from work. You smile at that and tell him you only have 2 more hours to go.
You realize it’s time to get back to work and now all you can think about is that damn video Hyunjin sent you. The way he was stroking his cock all nice and slow made you want to be there to give him even more pleasure. You were walking around all day with wet and sticky panties since you came a little bit from fingering yourself in the bathroom to the video. You couldn’t wait to bounce on Hyunjin’s cock all night after you get off work.
HAN. This was now the fifth dress you tried on and you still haven’t figured out a style you liked yet. You were getting frustrated but you weren’t going to let your pickiness get you down from shopping. You were at the mall with your boyfriend Han and as much as he hated shopping he liked to see you try on the pretty dresses for him so it was a win-win. You go to a different store now and you check out those dresses, making a beeline for the pink ones since that was your favorite color. You check out all the various designs and ask Han which ones he liked best, he didn’t really give much input and just picked the shortest one for you.
You gave him a playful side eye and put the dresses you didn’t like back, heading over to the dressing room so you can try everything on. As you were trying on the dresses, Han was sitting on a bench outside the door, texting all his homies. He soon started to notice how long it’s taking you in there and although you were busy trying on dresses he was getting tired of sitting here and waiting for what seemed like an eternity. He sighs as he figures out what to do, but he ends up deciding to knock on your dressing room door. You don’t reply but he can hear stuff rustling from the inside so he knocks again and tells you it’s just him.
“Uh… I think I need help,” you tell him reluctantly, he’s not sure what you need help with but he comes in anyway. He sees you standing in the dressing room with your hands in the air and the dress halfway up your body, he starts to laugh at how you were stuck in it.
“This isn’t a laughing matter, please help get this damn thing off of me!” You whine, and he begins to unzip the dress from the back, releasing you from its tight grip. You feel like you can finally breathe once again and slip the dress off of you, now completely naked in front of Han. You were only wearing your skimpy g-string and you had your nipples pierced which Han loved about you. He looks you up and down, licking his lips as if he was about to destroy you. The only thought in his head right now was to kiss you, so he grabs your face and crashes his lips into yours, moving some of your hair out the way. You kiss him back but harder and even more passionately, letting him fondle your boobs and play with your piercing. As he toys with your nipples he looks at you with pure lust, his eyes were all hazy and he looked nothing but in love with you. He started kissing your chin and licked the side of your neck, making you get all wet and worked up for him.
“We shouldn’t be doing this right here baby,” you tell Han as he continues roaming all over your body.
“Doesn’t that make you wanna do it even more though?” He says mischievously, sucking on your neck and giving you small hickies. You knew the chances of getting caught were very high but at this moment, you didn’t really seem to care. All you wanted right now was Han and that’s all that was on your mind. His hands slid down between your legs, spreading your pussy lips with his fingers and coating them with your essence. Your wetness was leaking down to your thighs and it took everything in you not to scream from Han’s touch. He inserts two fingers in your tight little hole and goes in and out slowly, you press your lips together trying not to make a sound, so he covers your mouth.
“Shhh… quiet babe,” He whispers into your ear.
FELIX. It’s not secret to Felix that you were a workaholic, you often immersed yourself in your work a little too much. He knows you are an independent woman that enjoys the freedom of working but at the same time he really wishes you’d give that same energy towards him sometimes. You traveled a lot for work and although you two live together, it still puts a strain on your relationship being apart for long periods of times. Felix loves to be around his lover and the fact you are always so busy with work makes him want to shower you with even more love and affection when he sees you. You were gone on another usual business trip but this time it was for a week, that was the longest you’ve gone for work and it was driving him insane. Everyday he thought of you and he would text you little things that he saw randomly throughout the day that reminded him of you. You always appreciated how much Felix adored you and your work ethic, he loved you for you.
The day you came back home from work Felix came to you with open arms, he was more than excited to see you again and all he wanted for the past week was the attention of his beautiful lover.
“I’ve missed you so so much baby,” Felix says whilst giving you the biggest hug, his body was so warm and you melted right into him. You gave him a kiss and he moves you both over to the couch, pulling away from kissing you for a second with a weird grin plastered on his face.
“What’s with that look?” You ask, wondering what he’s thinking in that head of his.
“I got you a little something, I’ll be right back,” he quickly runs to your shared room and comes back with a black box in his hand.
“What’s this?” You ask curiously, holding the box up to examine what it could be.
“Just open it, you’ll be surprised.”
You do as you’re told and open the box, you see a purple velvet bag and you open to see what’s inside. It was a vibrator, it had multiple settings and looked very high quality and expensive. You instantly blushed as you held the item in your hand, looking up at Felix so he can explain what’s going on.
“I wanted to get something to relieve your stress..” he continues “because you’re always so busy and stuff, y’know.”
You smile at the naughty gift your boyfriend gave you, giving him another kiss and thanking him.
“Want to use it on me now?” You ask, knowing that he’ll say yes to you in a heartbeat. Felix’s eyes light up like a kid in a candy store and he agrees without hesitation. He sits next to you on the couch with the toy in his hand and you’re now making out. As one thing leads to another, you end up naked lying on your back with your legs spread wide out for him. He has the toy on one of the highest settings and you’ve squirted about three times for him already.
“Come on baby, you can give me another. Just one more,” Felix says demandingly, having too much fun with this toy.
You spring your head back as you feel the toy in your soaking wet entrance, you don’t know how much more of this you can take. Your legs were violently shaking and the couch was soaked with your juices, you felt like you didn’t have anything left in you. Felix keeps fucking the toy in and out of you making you scream out for him, he palms himself through his pants as he does it.
“I never want you to be away from me again y/n,” Felix’s deep voice rasps as he pumps the toy into you deeper, “I mean it this time.”
SEUNGMIN. You were laughing hysterically as you were scrolling through TikTok, you’ve been glued to your phone for hours at this point. You showed Seungmin, who was sitting next to you on his bed yet another TikTok that he probably wouldn’t think is funny. You put the screen up to his face to show him the video and he looks but doesn’t really seem that interested. You tell him how funny you think the video is and he just shrugs his shoulders.
“You know, I’d rather have you shoved in my face rather than a phone.” Seungmin says to you.
‘Ok boomer’ you think to yourself, not wanting to actually say it incase he gets offended. You decide to just ignore his comment and go back to watching hilarious TikToks. Seungmin starts to get bored and he when he gets bored he becomes bratty. You hear him whine a little bit, looking up from your phone to see him pouting and all you want to do is give him a kiss.
“C’mere,” You command for him to come closer, he quickly does so looking like a lost puppy. He plants a chaste kiss to your lips, then begins to leave a trail of kisses down your neck. He slips a hand under your tank top and lightly squeezes your boob. You sigh as you feel him innocently brush past your nipples, then he trails some more kisses down your stomach. Once he makes his way down to your lower body, he quickly takes off your pants with ease. Teasing your clothed pussy a little bit, watching as a wet spot starts to appear from the outside, he circles your clit and starts to sniff you.
“You smell good baby,” Seungmin compliments, finally taking off your panties and tossing them somewhere on the bed. He kisses the inside of your thighs and feels the warmth of your skin on his lips. He loves every inch of you and he wants to take his time with you. Flicking his tongue on your clit and you hiss at the feeling, you want him to fuck you with his tongue. He licks a nice long stripe across your wet folds, staring up at you while doing so, your phone still in your hand the whole time. Seungmin brought his head up more to face you, “keep looking at your phone while I eat you out babe, pretend like I’m not even here.”
You comply with his instructions, continuing to watch TikToks like normal and Seungmin goes back to devouring your pussy like the good boy he is.
JEONGIN. It was a very nerve wrecking day for you, you were meeting Jeongin’s parents for the first time today. You put on your most expensive Dior perfume and prettiest heels to meet his mom since Jeongin told you she was very into fashion and can tell when girl’s wear cheap perfume. You wanted to impress this woman as much as possible since this was definitely going to be the man you wanted to marry someday. Jeongin reassures you the whole day that she was going to love you regardless,
“Even if you wore perfume from the Dollar Tree she’d still like you!” He tries to give reassurance. You don’t believe that’s true but when you get to his mom’s house you meet her and the rest of his family. His dad was super nice and everyone was very welcoming towards you. You were actually shocked by how chill and laid back everyone was, you felt bad for assuming that they would be mean to you. Jeongin’s mom was the last person you met, when you met her she came off as a little timid but then she started to warming up to you once you started having a lot of things in common.
She was really sweet and super funny, you now know why Jeongin is such a charming guy. You see Jeongin come up to you so he can pull you away from his mom for a bit but his mom brushes him off to tell him she wasn’t finished talking. He walks away with a defeated look on his face and you continue talking with his mom. When the food is ready everyone gathers at the table to eat and you sit beside Jeongin, his mom was across from you both. You were busy for most of the day talking with his family and getting to know everyone. He wanted to be with you but he couldn’t even get the chance, feeling left out in the conversation. You feel your phone vibrate from the table and you pick it up to see who it is, seeing that it’s from Jeongin but you’re confused because he’s sitting right next to you. You turn towards him to ask him why he just texted you but he puts his finger to his mouth to tell you it’s a secret. You place your phone under the table to look at the message,
‘Come meet me in the bathroom upstairs by the laundry room ;)’
You instantly blush from reading that text and try to hide your flustered expression. You look at him and nod your head to signal that you understand. Jeongin shoots his head up and tells his parents who were across the table from him that he needs to be excused to go to the bathroom. You shoot yourself in the foot thinking about what excuse you can come up with so you both don’t look sketchy.
“Sorry please excuse me I have to take this important call for my job,” you quickly say to his parents as you head over to where you’re supposed to go.
You meet Jeongin in the bathroom where he told you to and you went straight to heavily making out. He grabs your ass and spanks it lightly, “How long you think we can be in here before they start to notice?” You ask, his lips now glued to your neck.
“I dunno, I honestly don’t really give a fuck.” He says bluntly, turning you around to face the sink and the mirror, pressing his bulge against your ass. He starts grinding his dick against you slowly, kissing your neck and running his fingers down your body. He lifts up your dress and drags his cock to rub against your clothed cunt, you lowly moan his name and he smiles. He’s about to fuck you so hard against this sink all the while his parents not having a clue where you two went.
1K notes · View notes
starkwlkr · 1 month
Text
fever dream | sebastian vettel
part 2 part 3
warnings: toxic soon to be ex husband who cheats on reader (if i miss anything, let me know!!)
update: i decided to make this into a series, thanks for reading!! you can read it here!
Tumblr media Tumblr media
INSTAGRAM (private account)
Tumblr media
liked by lewishamilton, yoursistersaccount and 24 others
yourusername a short trip back home 🤍
lewishamilton enjoy it!
yourusername thanks lew! miss you and roscoe 🤍
lewishamilton roscoe and i miss you more
yoursistersaccount it’s great to have you home
yourusername 🤍 love you
view all 13 comments
“luke, alison! your aunt y/n is here!” your sister yelled as she opened the door to her home. in a matter of seconds, loud footsteps were heard running down the stairs. “no running!”
but still the kids didn’t listen, they were excited to see their aunt. “hey, my babies! oh my god, you two have grown so much. stop growing!” you hugged your niece and nephew.
“i’m almost as tall as mom!” alison, the younger sister, said.
“liar, that’s just what dad says to make you feel better. i’m going to grow more than you and then i’ll be taller than you.” luke teased.
“you both can be tall, but never as tall as me.” you joked as you placed a kiss on their cheeks.
“are you going to stay with us forever?” alison asked innocently. “dad said that you don’t want to stay with your husband anymore and you’re going to stay with us.”
“alison!”
the truth was hard for little kids to understand. yes, you were going to stay with your sister for a few days and yes, you didn’t want to stay with your husband anymore, but it was a bit more complicated than that. your husband had cheated, lied, manipulated you and you had enough. he was the reason you couldn’t come back to the sport you loved and worked your whole life for.
“well i am going to be staying here, but not forever. i just needed a break from him, it’s normal.” you tried to explain to the girl.
“but my mom and dad don’t take breaks?”
“alison, just go to your room, you too luke, please. dinner is going to be ready in an hour.” your sister said, feeling embarrassed that alison would ask those questions.
“what did i do?” the older boy whines as he and his sister walked up to their rooms.
“i’m sorry. i spoke to jack the night you called. we were cleaning up the table after dinner, i assume she heard.” your sister explained.
“it’s okay, they’ll understand when they’re older. not everyone is cut out to be loved . . .”
or a mother.
only a few people had known about your issues with infertility, your sister and lewis being two of them. after you retired from f1, you were sure that in a couple months, you were going to be busy with doctor’s appointments, buying baby clothes and building a crib, but none of that happened. after a year of trying, you were convinced you weren’t meant to be a mom.
you thought about returning to the track, after all many drivers returned after saying they were retiring, why couldn’t you? but that plan was spoiled by the man you thought loved you.
“you can’t go back, you don’t belong there. it’s a man’s sport. you’re probably going to crash in the first lap anyways.”
you didn’t know why you stayed with him, but you did. maybe it was the promises he kept telling you about or the hopefulness that one day you would become parents and maybe he would change. but again, none of that happened.
“um, i have to call someone. i’ll be right back. excuse me.” you told your sister as you walked to the patio door and exited the house. without hesitating, you clicked on a familiar contact. you held your phone against your ear and waited for the person on the other end to pick up. it felt like forever, but eventually they picked up the call.
“hello?”
2K notes · View notes
thexsilentxwordsmith · 2 months
Text
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
Simon "Ghost" Riley x Fem!reader
Author's Note: I had a comment left on my post HERE. The person who commented brought up this scenario of Simon being dared to kiss you and you think that he won't, but he actually does and sparks end up flying. So, of course, I had to write it because... I mean... Come on... (lol). And here it is.
Fandom: Call of Duty
Character(s): Simon Riley, Reader, Soap
Summary: During a game of Truth or Dare, your lieutenant is dared into giving you a kiss, but something about the way he has been acting lately may mean this is going to be more than a quick ordeal. And the way you have been feeling towards him won't be helping.
Word Count: 4k
Part 2: READ HERE
The night has started innocently enough: you and your fellow officers sit around together in the rec, blowing off a little steam after another successful mission. Some nice, simple fun of playing cards and shooting the shit like you usually do when leaving the base to go down to the bar isn’t an option. Everyone happens to be here tonight, including that brooding, mask-faced lieutenant that you can’t seem to keep your mind from drifting to as he stands against the wall behind you. 
Maybe it’s just your imagination, but you’ve noticed that the lieutenant’s presence has become more and more common lately, especially when you’re around. He keeps mostly to himself, staying on the edge of the fun by just watching, yet you swear that if you are stealthy enough from out of the corner of your eye you can catch his gaze lingering in your direction. 
Whether it’s just a trick of your mind or the truth, either way it makes your pulse race. And tonight is no exception.
All has been pretty calm so far, nothing too rowdy or out of hand. At least, it was until now as the night has waned on and inhibitions have fallen. What was once an innocent bit of fun has turned a bit more risque as Soap decides that cards aren’t enough to keep everyone entertained. What game is it he always seems to pick when everyone is more loose? One where the consequences always end up interesting: Truth or Dare.  
Several rounds have passed already where the truths have consistently gotten more honest and the dares even more spicy. No one is ready to call it quits just yet, but there is one person that hasn’t had a turn after all this time and that just won’t do, not if the Scottish sergeant has anything to say about it. Taking matters into his own hands, Soap turns his attention to the big man standing with his arms crossed, watching quietly. 
“Oy, Lt. Come on, you’re already ‘ere. Ya gotta join us,” Johnny says through the raucous laughter to drag the silent lieutenant into the merriment. “Or are ya chicken, hmm?”
As much as you want Lt. Riley to join in, you would rather him stick around and something like this could get him to walk out; you don’t want that to happen. “Fucking can it, Johnny,” you say as you strike him in the bicep with your fist. “You’re talking out of your ass, alright? Knock it off.”
To everyone’s surprise and yours, after a momentary pause, Lt. Riley steps up closer to the table with his arms still crossed. “ ‘s fine,” he dismisses your concern. “But, one round is all you’re gonna fuckin’ get from me, sergeant, so better make it count.”
Johnny nods his head in agreement, actually caught off guard that he is even able to get this far with the ever stoic and cold-shouldered officer. It all seems a bit too easy, but Soap isn’t going to pass up an opportunity like this to get the lieutenant involved. He’s gotta make this good whatever it is that gets chosen and so he pauses a minute to think of an idea for either scenario before speaking up. “Alright Lt, ye know how it goes. Truth or dare?”
Truth is never going to be an option for Lt. Riley, not with the level of secrecy he keeps to at all times when it concerns his life; he knows if he gives Johnny an inch he will take a goddamn mile. So, there is only one other option and though he tries to hide the fidgeting in his hands, he picks it.  
Maybe it’ll be something that’ll help him strike up a conversation with you later. “Dare,” he says. 
The grin that lights up Soap’s face instantly lets the entire table know that he is up to no good and the words that follow are a testament to that fact. You thought you knew Johnny well enough by now, but not even you could have been prepared for what came out of his mouth then. “Alright, I dare ye ta kiss our sassy little sergeant right here,” he says as he looks at you with an unwavering gaze. 
You meet his blue eyes and hold them in stunned silence. Is he fucking serious? As if Lt. Riley would ever go for something so fucking dumb as this. Johnny has to be out of his goddamn mind to put you in this position; it’s like he knows something he shouldn’t. Again your immediate reaction is to sock him in the arm, this time a bit harder to drive home the point that you are done with his bullshit. 
And yet… shockingly… you hear the lieutenant speak up.
“Fine,” Lt. Riley agrees to everyone’s amazement. 
You turn your attention to face him. “Are you sure? Johnny’s just being a dick, you don’t have to listen to him, sir,” you reassure as you shoot a glare that has the Soap nervously shifting in his seat, worrying about what is going to happen to him later for pulling such a ridiculous stunt.
“Said it’s fine,” he repeats, his gruff tone metered. “But I ain’t doin’ it ‘ere though; you’re not gettin’ a free fuckin’ show if that’s what you’re after Mactavish.”
“Alright, alright, I’ll give ya that,” Johnny concedes. Those blue eyes scan the room for a solution. “How about ‘round tha corner there.”
He points to the bend in the wall a few feet away; far enough from the group that they won’t be able to tell what’s happening behind it. Since there are now stipulations that the lieutenant has set, Johnny is going to add his own as well for good measure. “However,” he pipes up, “since it ain’t in front a us here, ya gotta stay in place for 10 minutes. I doubt ye’ll actually do anything, but might as well make ye both have ta awkwardly stand there for a bit. And don’t think yer gonna pull a fast one; I’m gonna be countin’.”
You look back at the lieutenant and he gives a nod. “Fine,” you agree as well. How you are able to keep your voice so steady when you feel that jolt deep in the pit of your stomach is a mystery, but you pull it off just fine.
With the rules set Lt. Riley stares at you as if waiting for you to get up from your seat first before he moves. You do and he immediately follows close behind as you make your way over to the wall just past the corner amidst the sounds of whistles and whoops. With a quick flip of the bird back over your shoulder to the group, you both vanish around the side and come to a stop a few feet from the edge. 
You lean your back up against the wall as he comes to stand in front of you, watching you intensely through the opening in his thin balaclava. As you wait to see who will speak first, you notice a tension in his broad shoulders that hadn’t been there before. This is the first time you both have ever been this close to one another and you can’t overlook the fact that he seems even bigger now that you are standing so near; you can’t help but admire how small you feel next to him.  
The longer he stares at you with those golden eyes, studying your face as if he is deciding something, the more rapid your heartbeat thumps heavy in your chest. He takes a step closer and then another before coming to a stop again. Now there is less than a foot’s distance between your bodies and suddenly there is a shift in the atmosphere around you both, a thick tension that is growing harder to ignore. 
The sounds of laughter filters over to the both of you, breaking you out of the haze of your thoughts. “You know, we don’t have to do anything. If you want me to lie, it’s fine, sir,” you speak before he has a chance to. “Fuck Johnny for putting us in this situation. We can just stand here in silence until we get called back.”
He clears his throat. “Who said anythin’ ‘bout lyin’?” he asks with a raise of his eyebrow that you can make out through the mask. “Just don’t wanna, is that it?” 
Something in the way he says the statement catches you off guard. Why does he sound slightly disappointed? Did he want to actually do this? You couldn’t really believe that; no, you must be reading this all wrong. “No, that’s not…” you stumble over your words; why is it getting harder to speak? “I just… didn’t think you’d want to… but… if you do then…”
“Yes or no?” he cuts off your string of stammering.
“Yes,” you confirm. 
Nothing else needs to be said other than that. His hand moves to his face, his fingers finding the bottom edge of his mask, and now you can’t breathe as you wait to see what’s under there. This is the first time you’ll be able to see more than just his eyes and that leaves your mind reeling.
Okay, you prepare yourself, it’s just a kiss, right? Nothing to it; you’ve been kissed before. This will be no different. Just breathe and we’ll get through it.
The mask is wrenched up above his nose so that his mouth is revealed and spread across waiting for you is a subtle, cocky smirk. Your cheeks flush as your eyes are drawn to the facial hair covering his jaw and outlining his lips; short, light brown outgrowth from not having shaved today. It accentuates his strong jaw perfectly and though you try, you can’t look away.
Still focused on his face you miss the warning as a strong hand suddenly finds its way onto your waist as he moves against you. His broad chest is pressed up to yours, you can feel it through the thinner fabric of his shirt, and you can’t tell whether it’s your own pounding heartbeat or his that you feel. That tension is suffocating now that he is this close, the air so thick it feels like you can cut it with a knife. You wait impatiently for the moment to finally break.  
It feels like you are holding your breath when after a few more seconds he finally speaks. “Good,” he says with a bit of breathiness to his voice, “cause I’m no liar.”
Leaning his head down slowly to reach you his lips inch ever closer until you can feel their warm, ghostly presence brush over your mouth causing your eyes to flutter shut as the ecstasy from the anticipation of them making contact overwhelms you. They are there, right there, and you plead with the universe to finally let them touch. You feel him inhale sharply and with that they are crashing against yours. It is with such an automatic, visceral intensity that it knocks the wind from your lungs.
Simon had been certain until the second your lips made contact that he could keep himself under control, that this was nothing more than sinless fun, but as he breathes in the hot, moist air from your mouth while he captures it again, he already knows that this is not going to end how he has intended. There is an immediate magnetism that you both cannot pull from and what is supposed to be something quick, turns mind-numbing in an instant.
Time stands still as your lips twine together in that familiar back and forth and what can only be a few short seconds extend out into an eternity. It’s like flicking on a switch how easily you melt into his embrace, like acquainted lovers, like your lips have always meant to be pressed tightly together. 
How can this be the first time you have ever kissed?
The stubble covering the exposed half of his face pricks along your cheeks the more he advances; the skin around your lips and your jaw growing more raw each time he moves, but the way it makes your face burn is far from painful. His breathing has become more strained, muscles tensing as he risks nipping carefully at the skin on your lower lip.
You inhale a sharp breath through your teeth and then it happens: an unconscious reaction to the pleasure surging through your veins like liquid fire. You can’t stop yourself as a sneaky moan creeps up your throat and before you can swallow it back down you hum it into his mouth. 
That low, alluring sound leaves that hulking military officer hungry to hear more. Those large hands of his desperately want to paw at your body, to caress all those silky curves against the coarse skin of his palms, to let his fingertips linger at all that delicately soft flesh for as long as he can. A deep, gnawing ache settles itself in his chest as he takes your lips with more feral aggression; Simon has never craved something more in that moment than to keep you like this entangled with him. 
The longer he goes, the more there is nothing tentative about his movements; he kisses you like he owns you. Lt. Riley steals from you as if your lips are air and he will suffocate without them, his desperation is the kind that feels like this is life or death and he needs you to survive. You are unprepared for the fucking bliss of it all, the raw, unbridled passion that his lips create as the friction abrades the tender skin of your mouth. 
And your thoughts scream for him to keep going.
You match his intensity with your own, kissing him back with everything that you have in you. He opens his mouth slightly and without thinking your tongue moves in and presses against his, trying to shove its way into his mouth. Fuck, he is not prepared for you to be so keen and it throws him off for only a moment before he leans into that passion and comes back with his response.
The lieutenant braces one of his large hands near your hip, pinning you to the wall while his mouth engulfs your own as he slides his tongue in between your teeth to fill the cavity full. It slithers over the surface of your tongue towards the back of your mouth, the taste of you intoxicating so that he cannot get enough. The pleasure is so intense that it severs his connection with reality and everything outside of your joined mouths fades away into background noise. His other hand moves from your waist and is suddenly wrapped around the back of your neck, his thumb holding steadily against your jaw to keep your head securely in his grip so that he can pull you as tight against his face as he can stand. 
Your head is reeling from the potency of those hot, feverish lips that are suck yours into their desperate embrace. Then his knee forcefully pries its way between your thighs and you are sure that you will not come back from this. It’s too much to handle and you’ve lost all control… no, that’s not right. You’ve yielded everything completely to him without even having to think about it and he has taken every single ounce of what he has been given as if it has always been his. 
Leaning up into him, you stand up on the balls of your feet as he guides the movement of your head by tilting it from one side to the other in that natural dance that happens when lips play. You are both insatiable as that carnal need to devour the other makes it impossible to not relinquish yourselves to the ecstasy that overwhelms in that moment. 
Never in your life have you wanted a man to possess you more than you want your superior to right now. Images of him picking you up and slamming your back into the wall, making you encircle his waist with your legs, his cock straining and throbbing between your clothed sex as you plead with him to take you, fill your mind until they make you light-headed. 
Lt. Riley is not faring any better and he has to focus his entire will into keeping his hands engaged so that he can resist the tingling in his fingertips to find the button on your pants and undo them. If you were alone without the threat of interruption, you might already be half undressed by now, but just as that urge reaches its peak and his fingers are moving in, you both hear the words that make your hearts sink.
“Eh, you two,” you hear Soap calling out from a distance, “times up.”
It is torture to pull away from you; Simon is on the verge of combusting from being forced to stop before he is ready.  But he has to or else he might be found out and there is still hesitation to admit that he might actually want more of this. Even after the ecstasy you both had just shared he isn’t sure how far he should let this go and so with a sigh of defeat he releases your lips from his own. 
By the time he lets you go and moves out from between your legs, your stance is unsteady and your mind fuzzy. The sudden lack of pressure against your mouth leaves you feeling empty and you have to stop yourself from whining aloud. As your eyes slowly flutter open you look up into his face and are met with that chocolate brown gaze lingering on you. There is something swimming in the depths of his eyes: a question, a statement, you’re not sure, but he doesn’t say it aloud. The need to say something yourself eats at you, but you close your mouth tight and bite your tongue to keep silent. 
You can’t bring yourself to risk admitting that you don’t want him to stop; what if he doesn’t feel the same? The pressures of putting it all out there at this moment is too much to handle. Instead, you let the moment die away quietly as you breathe deeply through your nose.
“Times up,” Lt. Riley repeats the phrase softly as he situates his balaclava back down under his chin to hide himself from you once again. The others are cheering for your return, giving you no time to collect yourself, so you simply sigh and stride back to the group together.
Heads turn your direction as you reappear back into the main room. “Well?” the heavily accented voice of the bastard that has orchestrated this whole thing questions you both. 
Trying not to stumble back to your seat, you play it off as if you hadn’t just had your soul sucked out through your lips. “Well what?” you return as the lieutenant passes you up and takes his place back behind the group.
Soap’s brow furrows. “Don’t play dumb with us, lass,” he chides. “Was he any good?”  
You cautiously take your seat back where you had been as everyone waits for your answer, trying to give yourself more time to calm your pulse that is still racing like wildfire through your tingling limbs. “It was fine,” you say, hoping you are collected enough to pull off such a bold-faced lie. 
“Oh really?” Johnny asks skeptically as he eyes you up and down to read your body language. Your heart leaps in your chest as you think you’ve been found out, that the bloom in your cheeks is still too noticeable, but he continues like nothing. “I think yer full a shit. Probably didn’t even get a peck, knowin’ LT. I bet ye did nothin’ back there, but stand in silence.”
You snicker at him, carefully adjusting yourself in your seat so you can squeeze your legs together to relieve the throbbing in such a way that it doesn’t draw attention. “Aww... Guess that’s only for us to know and for you to spend all your time worrying about, bitch. It’s gonna eat at you, isn’t it? Gonna lose sleep thinking about me and the lieutenant, hmm?” you pick back, which seems to get him off your case. 
“Ye wanna add anythin’ here?” Soap asks as he turns to the mask officer.
You risk a glance over your shoulder back at your superior, knowing that this could undo all your progress at regaining your composure, and you catch him completely lost in thought, not having heard a word that Soap just said. Quickly he recovers, clearing his throat. “What’re ya on about, Mactavish?” he questions back. 
“I asked if ye had anythin’ to add to her account of events,” Johnny chuckles. “Or are ye too stunned ta speak?”
The lieutenant shoots him a glare before pulling his pack of cigarettes out of his pocket. “Don’t push yer fuckin’ luck, yeah?” he answers it like a threat as he flips open the pack and places a cig in between his fingers.
Soap holds up his hands innocently with palms facing out in agreement not to start any trouble. “Ye must a been terrible, lass,” Soap picks as he turns his attention back to you to keep the jovial atmosphere up. 
You slug him hard enough to make his chair squeak from the force before joining in the others laughter to disguise the heat still burning through your cheeks. Simon takes the opportunity to slip out unnoticed, though you let your eyes follow him one last time. It is a monumental task that he has to perform to actively put one foot in front of the other, to calculatedly focus his breathing to stay calm, and make it out of the door without anyone noticing that his composure is clearly broken. 
Once out of sight he hurriedly steps out into the cool night air and immediately rips up his mask as he lights his cigarette, taking a long, heavy drag off it as he leans up against the brick of the building. The nicotine tingles his throat and he hopes it’ll be enough of a distraction to stop the intense pounding in his chest. Breathing the smoke out in a weighty sigh he adjusts the crotch of his pants as they have suddenly become too tight for his comfort. 
“Fuckin’ hell,” he mutters under his breath as he leans his head back against the wall and closes his eyes, desperately trying to focus on anything in a vain attempt to calm himself, but he already knows its no use.
The second his eyes are shut all he can think about is that kiss: he can still feel his arm around you, detect the ghost of your lips against his, sense the warmth of your breath in his mouth. He tries to push the delectable sensations from his mind, but they aren’t going anywhere anytime soon and he knows it. 
Opening his eyes he stands back up off the wall with a need that compels him, making him move strategically so that he can peek through the door without being seen. Sneakily he stares back into the building, those brown eyes catching the sight of you smiling and laughing, those full lips making his blood pressure rise as he watches them move about as you speak, still red and swollen from being claimed. 
This is a problem, a big fucking problem. Now the only thing that that hardened military man can think about, instead of keeping his distance, is how he can recreate that exact scene with you again.
And maybe, just maybe, take it even further.
2K notes · View notes
leascorner · 3 months
Text
b.b. | With child
Summary: He was so absorbed by his own created misery; he hadn’t actually thought about what you could be thinking. How hard was it for you to congratulate all of your friends on their pregnancy, to watch over all of his nieces and nephews? It was all within easy reach and never really yours.
Pairing:  Benedict Bridgerton x f!reader
Warnings: angst ('cause I can't write anything else), alluding to sex (no description whatsoever), discussions around pregnancy, pregnancy, mention of alcohol.
Words Count: 2.1k
Author's Notes: Had this in the work for the longest time. I was actually thinking to publish it for his season (#4 I hope!). But we got new stills of Season 3 and it's nearly Valentine's Day so... Enjoy!
Tumblr media
“Are you-” you asked when you noticed your sister-in-law had let her glass of wine and her plate untouched.
Your words stayed lost on your tongue, yet Daphne, sat in front of Benedict and next to you, knew exactly what you were about and nodded slightly, tears in her eyes. You let out a small cry of excitement and leant in to hug her. While you wore the most delighted expression, Benedict’s heart sunk a little at the news.
His sister was with child. Again. She was the second women of his family to be expecting this year, while he had yet an exciting news to share himself.
You both had wed a little over than a year and a half ago now and were yet to be blessed with a child. You were doing your best, of course, but none your efforts had been fruitful so far. Benedict did not mind; he had waited his whole life to meet you, he definitely could wait a little bit longer.
He did not mind, or so he thought…
Tonight, he thought life was particularly unfair to him. Every pregnancy announcement was only nourishing this harrowing feeling in his chest. All he could feel was his siblings’ bliss and it made him sick to the stomach. Yes, he was sick with jealousy - and ultimately selfish. He just couldn’t wait to feel your belly growing, to hold your children, to watch them playing around with their cousins, for them to grow older and become adults themselves. Just this simple thought made his very own heart felt extremely heavy.
Politely and quietly, he raised his glass wishing his sister a healthy pregnancy, before drinking away his sorrow.
The ride home that night was particularly quiet.
Silence had never been a thing between the two of you. Benedict was usually the most talkative, telling you about his days, about whatever painting he was going to paint, about that book he had been reading. You would listen, looking back at him with your big bright eyes and a soft smile onto your lips. Other times, he would watch you pacing back and forth in his study while passionately debating about politics. He would be drawing imaginary circles on your soft skin as you were lying in bed, you telling him about another one of your days chaperoning one of his sisters. He would listen to your laugh at one of his jokes. Even your fights would be followed by soft apologies, quiet words, whimpers, and love.
On the contrary, that night, the air was thick with something he couldn’t quite describe, and the coach was wrapped up in dark clouds, a genuine storm in the awakening. Sat on the opposite side, you were looking through the window, your face only light up by the few shines of the full moon. Benedict was so focused on his own thought that he didn’t realize you hadn’t had a word for the rest of the night.
He was so absorbed by his own created misery; he hadn’t actually thought about what you could be thinking. How hard was it for you to congratulate all of your friends on their pregnancy, to watch over all of his nieces and nephews? It was all within easy reach and never really yours. It only made him angrier at the entire world. Why couldn’t they let you live this as well?
He would have liked to discuss this with you - his regrets, his hope - but he was too afraid you would realize what a failure he was. How disappointed with him you were. How you would hate him for not being able to offer you this. So, he sat back in his seat and watched out of his own window.
When the coach stopped in front of your residence, Benedict got out first, offering his hand to help you getting down the small step like he always did. You smiled at him, thanking him politely, and let go of his hand as soon as your two feet were on the ground. It didn’t mean anything, he tried to reassure himself, you needed both of your hands to grab the tissue of your dress to prevent the hem from getting wet and dirty. Yet, he couldn’t help the sharp pain in his chest.
Silently, he followed you inside, hat in his hands, jaw locked. You were welcomed as usual by your housemaid, who got both of your coats and stayed there, in the uncomfortable silence, arms full, waiting for one of you to dismiss her. As you took off your gloves and didn’t dare look at Benedict, he nodded sharply to let her know she could go and watched her somehow disappear in an instant.
Suddenly, it was only the two of you again and it was all too much for him. He couldn’t breathe properly; his chest being crushed by the invisible weight of his sorrow. He couldn’t bare staying with you one more second. He needed to get out of here.
“Good night,” he said firmly, before walking to his study.
Would he have looked back he would have seen you watching him disappear in the corridor. You, all alone in the middle of the hall, arms dangling. He would have seen the frown on your face and the hurt in your eyes. Would he have looked back he would have run back to your side. Instead, he did none of that. He continued marching, head up high, trying to escape his own misery.
You sighed before turning in the opposite direction and to your shared bedroom.
Benedict went to bed less than an hour after you.
He had been haunted by guilt as soon as he had reached his study, sadness evaporating once he had stepped inside the room. Instead of turning back and chasing after you, he had tried to put his head in order. He then had tried painting whatever he was feeling, but he could only stay in front of his white canvas, terrified of laying his brush on the cotton. He had tried writing it, but he couldn’t concentrate enough; his thoughts always drifting to you, alone in your bedroom. He had then settled on having a drink to wait long enough for you to fall asleep before he could go to bed - his other option would have been to sleep in his study if he got too drunk, which he did not.
He had thought long about the whole situation. It wasn’t like you were not trying. Sometimes, even with doing the right things, it didn’t happen. He would need to accept this. And he couldn’t continue being a terrible husband. It wasn’t your fault; it wasn’t anybody’s fault actually. What he knew more than anything though was that he loved you. Whatever would happen, he could not afford to lose you.
He had decided he would come clean tomorrow, but for now, he only wanted to sleep with you by his side.
In the dark of your room, Benedict undressed and lied besides you as silently as possible.
All he could hear was your uneven breathing; whatever dream you were having did not seem to be pleasant. He reached out to your arm, hoping that you could feel his presence through his touch and know he would always be there for you.
It wasn’t until your body was rocked by a hiccup that he understood that you were not having a bad dream, you were crying.
“Y/N?” he asked, lying on his side to face your back.
“I am so sorry,” your voice was only a whisper.
He gently made you roll on your side. Even in the dark, his right hand was able to find your face and his thumb to rub the tears away. Before he could ask what was wrong, you spoke:
“I am so-” You chocked on – yet – another sob and it took you a couple of seconds to even out your breathing so you could speak properly: “So sorry- for not being able to get you- get you what you ever wanted.”
“My love,” he sighed, grabbing the back of your neck to bring you closer. Instinctively, you hide your face in his chest, and he started stroking your hair to try and calm you. “My love, do not ever feel guilty on this.”
“I have tried every tea, every method that is supposed to help,” you cried some more.
It broke his heart to realize the burden on your heart - of course, if he was feeling it, you would have too. He finally understood how selfish he had been, how centred on his own pain he was and so oblivious to yours. It had never been a subject between the two of you, but it was slowly crushing you both.
“My love, this is not your fault.”
“You don’t see the pity in their eyes. You don’t hear them whisper.” You sniffled against his chest, arms wrapped around his waist. “We are even blessed Lady Whistletown has not written about us.” He heard the frustration in your voice and the ton of it made him understand how you had tried to suppress the guilt but failed. It pained him that out of all of this, it was you who were the one being charged guilty by everyone - you included. As if you couldn’t imagine it being his own fault. As if you couldn’t imagine it being anyone’s fault but yours.
“Perhaps, I-” he stopped, running a hand through his hair out of frustration. “I drink loads of Colin’s stupid tea; I paint with all sorts of chemicals substance. Perhaps, I can’t-”
“Ben, of course, no!”        
“Perhaps we won’t ever-” he confessed, but he couldn’t even say it out loud. It was all too much.
You moved against him, and he felt both of your hands grabbing his face, your forehead resting again his. He felt your hot breath against his skin, and he hugged you tighter, crushing your bones, making sure you were close.
He had you, he kept repeating himself. It was all that mattered. Of course, it was a dear wish of his to see mini versions of yourselves running around, but not at all costs. He wasn’t willing to sacrifice what you both had, right here, right now.
“We are both healthy, it is more than all I could ever wish for.”
“Will this ever be enough for you, though?” you asked so quietly he nearly did not hear you.
Benedict frowned. Was it really what you thought? That he would leave you? That your own self was not enough for him? He had been an even more terrible husband he had thought to lead you thinking this. He had failed you on so many levels.
“I was so absorbed by my own desire of having my own family,” he whispered back like he was telling you a secret, “I never asked if you also desire to have children of your own.”
“Ben, of course, I want your children!”
Benedict wanted to express how grateful he was to have you in his life, but no words came to his mind at that moment. He only reached out to your lips, trying to express how much he loved you.
If he could not tell you, he could still show you…
Hours later, while you were lying in bed, your head on Benedict’s chest, his left hand drawing invisible love words on your back and the other holding you close, he thought that there was nothing else he would like to do than stay with you, like this, forever.
“We should just take some time away from here.”
“What do you mean? The season only began-”
“To hell with worldliness. Some time away, just the two of us.” The sun was slowly peeking through the blinds, its yellow light was painting on your naked skin a glowy spectrum. “I heard South of France is particularly beautiful, this time of the year.”
Your chin on his chest, you looked back at him, eyes bright. He was looking at you the same way you had catch him do a million time: a soft smile on his lips, his eyes filled of this spark, shinning only for you. You didn’t care how beautiful France would be, he was the most beautiful view you had ever laid eyes on.
His hand brushed some hair out of your face, and you grabbed it to kiss his knuckles.
“France, it is then.”
Little did you know, you would be coming back home a few months later, bearing your own little miracle.
One of the many to come.
1K notes · View notes