#yeah I know I'm always out of character

[royalarchivist]

[A sad violin song plays over an image of a sad hamster]

Pac: This doesn't have anything to do with me – I wear a blue sweatshirt, you're crazy, this mouse doesn't even have a sweatshirt, this hamster! [Reading chat] Am I a depressed hamster?

[ Transcript continued ↓ ]*

–

Pac: Actually– that's fine! I embrace that idea – of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy? [He hits his desk, then starts counting off people on his fingers] Fit is gone, Richarlyson is gone, Ramon is gone, Bagi and Empanada who were always there when we were there are also gone, I haven't seen them! It's just me and Tubbo, and sometimes Philza shows up.

Pac: I lost Chume Labs, I lost the Favela, I lost Murder Mystery, I lost Ilha Chume Labs, it's crazy! Look at how much I've lost, and I've gained nothing! Of course I'm going to be depressed, are you crazy?! How am I supposed to be happy?!

Pac: [Reading chat] "You have us Pac," that's true, thank you. No, that's true, sorry.

* NOTE: Please note that this is an incomplete transcript, as I was primarily relying on Aypierre's translation mod at the time and if I am not confident of the translation, I do not include it. As always, please feel free to add on translations or message me corrections.

#Pactw #QSMP #Pac #March 18 2024 #As much as I love keeping people updated about Pac / the other Portuguese-speaking creators #I think I might not make as many transcribed posts for their clips anymore #I just don't think I'm qualified enough to be transcribing things for a language I don't know #like yeah we have the Qlobal Translator and Aypierre's translators to rely on #And I'm always upfront when I'm not 100% sure about a translation #but I've been thinking about it a lot and it kinda makes me feel a bit icky. Idk. #I might be overthinking this but I just I don't want to spread around translations I'm not super confident about #esp. since I know a lot of people cite my clips in analysis posts or link them to other people as resources #and 90% of the time I'm like ''Hell yeah I love seeing people getting a lot of use out of the archive'' #but sometimes I get a bit anxious like ''Did I do a good enough job translating this'' #''Am I ruining someone's entire perception of a conversation or character because I left one word out or mistranslated something?'' #And like I said that's normally not a HUGE concern since if I'm not certain about a translation I just won't post a clip. but you know #idk it might just be the anxiety talking but I really really don't want to spread bad info #Happy to hear other folks' perspective #I'm really grateful for people like Bell and Pix and others who translate clips and I always try to reblog those #but we don't have a ton of people posting clips & translating things on Tumblr since we're so English-centric #which is part of the reason WHY I like sharing clips of the non-English-speaking CCs #but at the same time I want to do an accurate job representing what they're saying #Maybe I'll just start posting things and give a TLDR context of what they're talking about but not a transcript #that way native-speakers can hop in and add translations if that's something they're comfortable doing #and if not then well. at least I'm not sharing something that isn't super accurate #idk I'm just thinking out loud a bit in the tags #But I'm open to hearing other people's thoughts on the matter #Anyways giant rant aside. q!Pac is NOT doing ok rn

[canisalbus]

hey! do you consider yourself a furry? if so, do you enjoy being in the community? if not, what label do you use, and why? (been wanting to ask this for a while:))

Sure, I don't mind being called a furry. My art certainly qualifies as furry art and my characters are furry characters. But I've never been that connected or active in the furry fandom in general. There's a lot of core experiences that I'm missing: I don't have a fursona, I don't own a fursuit and I've never been to a furry con. My online circles are very furry-centric but I don't think any of my irl friends consider themselves furries, despite our shared tastes and interests.

#so yeah furry but not a very community oriented one I guess #I'm always out of the loop when it comes to happenings and drama and such I literally never know what's going on #I tend to use the word anthro when referring to my art/characters but that's just personal preference furry is equally correct #I feel like all furries are anthros but not all anthros are furries and I just like to pick the word that covers both? #while we're here let me say that I find the theme of anthropomorphism super fascinating #people have been humanizing animals since prehistory which lends it a sense of timelessness and it's a concept that is culturally universal #it's silly but #in some trivial way I feel connected to the larger continuum of humans making nonhuman things in their own image #which is nice it makes me feel kinship to those cavemen who sculpted lion headed human figures out of mammoth ivory 35 000 years ago #answered #anonymous

[marshmallowgoop]

I combined footage from my Detektiv Conan Blu-ray with audio from my Case Closed FUNimation DVD and made an HD English dub clip compilation for Episodes 57-58, "The Holmes Freak Murder Case."

#detective conan #case closed #video #funimation english dub script #i wasn't actually gonna post this video to tumblr because it's so long (because i have a lot of feelings about this case!) #but folks on discord liked it and i'm all about my funi dub propaganda so why not right? #the dub script here is just so fun--and does so well at making the dialogue *work* and sound natural in english #and has so much flavor! it does arguably too much in terms of creative liberties but things like #'can i really trust what a kid saw?' of the sub translation compared to 'and what were you smoking before you ran out there?' in the dub #are much more enjoyable to me #(other fun phrasings: 'the one who's always hangin' around you guys' (sub) vs. 'the little-bitty one with the great big brain!' (dub)) #(and 'of course not! the reason i applied for this tour was 'cuz i thought i might find kudo' (sub)) #(vs. 'who me? no no no. actually i signed up because i was hoping to run into jimmy here. but i guess i'm out of luck' (dub)) #(and so many more! this script just has so much character) #and while it is a shame that the dub eliminated heiji's accent i do like the changed line ('i know it's you!') #'cause you've met shinichi *once* heiji lol #but yeah this is a fun case! i'm really happy to have finally hd'd the funi dub for it :') #one of my favorite things about the funi dub is that jerry jewell (shinichi's va) voices conan's thoughts #and it's so nice to hear *shinichi* and heiji deducting together (and the way they finish each other's thoughts and vibe... it gets to me)

[icewindandboringhorror]

Some fantasy traveler inventory details (like what they would carry in their bags), based on two of the recent costumes I did.. love finding random little scraps and items and putting them together lol

#it's obvious who's is who's since they match their outfits HOWEVER.. consider if they were switched lol #evil villain looking man carrying around pressed flowers in a cutesy lacy pouch #fantasy costume #what's in my bag #actualyl that would have been funny to make a video. I should make a video #I'm sure someone else has already done this #but like.. lifestyle vlogger type content however I'm dressed in fully costume as some weird elf or something #pulling things out of my bag and showing them to the camera and talking about how they're useful for whatever #but it's all fantasy scenarios and talking like it's very common #'and of course. i know it's a bit cliche #EVERY traveler has one of these. but you know. theyre just useful! thats why everyone has one!' *pulls out a completely unrecognizable item #thats like some weird fantasy world prop and doesn't even explain it because In-world it's normal and wouldnt need to be talked about* #'room tour' video and it's just like 'yeah I sleep on this mat under a bunch of trees uh.. over here by these rocks. at least right now. I #kind of wander around a bit. so' #Like a clothing haul but it's a potions shop haul or something and they ramble about some obscure drama in the potions community and how the #y hard to barter and steal and entire flock of sheep or something just to get one of them. etc. etc. #I could do ones for different characters too like. multiple people from different walks of life showing what they carry around with them. #just like this but more interview sort of vlog format instead of photos #This is where not having much money and not having my own house with land becomes an issue though #I think it would take you out of the illusion if the background was always the same. I can make small sets because there's one blank wall in #a room that it's easy to move all the stuff away from in front of and clear a spot and like hang up fabrics or whatever but still.. hmms #So one of those 'fun idea but dubious about handling the execution' things. also One Of Those Things where without looking it up you're 100% #sure it's already been done and you don't want to look weird since it's vaguely niche. Like if 100 people have done something it's fine but #if only like 3 other people have then you look weird maybe ghhjbj.. or only one other person gods forbid. looks even weirder potentially #Or do people not care about ''copying'' anymore?? idk. I'm not updated with the internet's changing culture. I just have a fear of accidenta #lly doing something like that and then people getting mad even though it's really just that I competely had no idea it had been done because #again.. I live under a rock and am unaware of everything lol. ANYWAY. also would require my face being on video which I don't like. Though I #would be in costume so that helps. I think to be fully comfortable I'd need light modifications to make my face look different. which isn't #hard but is more effort when it has to be translatable in multiple angles. ANYWAY. ghjbhj... Now I think it would be funny actually. maybe #one day. I haven't made any videos (aside from on the gameplay/sims channel) in a long long time actually. hmm'st

[13eyond13]

love it when a character that's hard to read intuitively for you has like a dedicated fandom interpreter who can just glance at their blank face in a panel and then give you a 3k word essay on their innermost thoughts & desires & fears and neatly tie it back into the themes & whatnot as if it's the most obvious thing in the world

#im talking about griffith btw #guts i feel i get intuitively - maybe because i have some personality traits in common with him #and we get more about his life concretely told to us in canon. so he is a bit easier to pin down as a character and feel attached to for me #but whenever i was reading the manga i just kept wanting more insight about griffith's actions and feelings #like ok yeah its fun to have mysterious antagonists and suspense /tension etc but its also fun to feel like you deeply understand them too #and i felt like that was a bit missing from him for me in canon #so reading about him in analysis and fics is the most fun for me rn #he always felt kinda half unreal to me- which maybe was the point of him - but i wanted a bit more about his childhood or something? #and wished we had more stuff explicitly from his pov in the story to read or explanation about his transformation or wtv #and now he's so much more closed off to me even than he was in the golden age. i keep waiting for him to explain stuff and he does not #ANYWAYS all this rambling to say some people out there are very good at interpreting him and making his like. insecurities #more obvious to me bc i didnt really get that side of him from canon intuitively well #also im really enjoying reading the first few berserk fics ive read #there may not be a ton of them out there but there is def writing talent in the fandom #i'll share some recs once i'm done sifting through most of what's out there to read #also (not to tie everything back to death note but it IS my home fandom after all) #i feel griffith is obvs the more light-like character here and L maybe a bit guts-like? but unlike berserk in death note #light is the one you get to know best and L is the mysterious / unreal one you don't get a lot of concrete insight into #and in the DN fandom I can read the more mysterious character intuitively but had to warm up to the less mysterious one instead #and the mystery of L makes sense to me and doesnt bug me as much due to like - he HAS to hide a lot about himself or else he will die lol #so some similarities there but also some opposite feels as well #berserk spoilers #p

[tricoufamily]

oh i can just show a journey through beckett and connor to show you what i mean by i went through this awkward transition phase before. do you see what i mean

#blood sports characters aren't changing at ALL i'm still very happy with where they all are right now #if no one got me blood sports got me you know #but they couldn't have gone from step 1 to step 4 just like that they had to go through several variations on step 2 and 3 #i don't even hate og beckett anymore honestly. i think he has charm #do you like beckett's dark academia phase sdjfklsjfs. yeah there was a point where blood sports took place in london. i don't even know #he has not always been southern this is actually a fairly recent development #he started out kinda punk ish then got grunge then very very briefly dark academia and now he's our country boy. he's been through a lot

[priceofreedom]

funny how everyone seemed to adore Zack until he started having more screentime...

#it's honestly very surprising. i see hate towards him almost every day since Remake came out and i wish i was kidding #and yeah yeah i know other characters get lots of hate too but the hate towards him has been so sudden and random??? #idk maybe he *was* hated before but i just didn't notice #but at the same time no. i'm 100% sure the hate increased considerably after he was shown to be alive in the Remake #i feel like some people are just weirdly concerned he is gonna overshadow the main characters which is stupid #this story is still about Cloud and the others #we're just gonna explore another reality (allegedly) with Zack it's not that deep bro #(rebirth spoilers) -> even in Zack's timeline Cloud AND Aerith are there #and who knows how many more #like i get shippers being petty because when are they not petty #but i've seen non-shippers/casual players saying they do not want to see more of him and being all bitter bc he's important #he's always been important you all just refuse to acknowledge it!!! #no matter how many times hamaguchi nomura nojima etc say he's super important ppl just keep denying it 💀 #as if y'all know more than the freaking devs i'm getting tired of this bs #my post #i'm glad the devs love him as much as we do. cry about it

[iwritenarrativesandstuff]

I've been thinking about how Vash always seems to be hungry. Or at least, that he's shown eating quite often in the manga. Happily having his salmon sandwiches. Eating an entire box of donuts in the side car. Knowing the conversion rate of bullets to pizza. Seeing a flower and immediately wondering if it's edible. Pondering his life over breakfast. It's a really cute little character detail about him - he likes food.

But then I kind of started to think about the angel arm and its specific brand of destruction. How there were no bodies to be recovered. Nothing but a crater left of July, left on the Fifth Moon. It's all been incinerated. Devoured, even. Tristamp takes it even a step further and makes the power something akin to a black hole - a yawning drain; a constant destructive hunger.

Vash is clearly terrified of this potential for destruction, and for very good reason. But it's not separate from him as some kind of "power he can't control" - it's his arm. It's literally his arm. It is him. Vash is scared of himself, scared of losing control. He does what he can to repress it, even subconsciously (the gaps in his memory whenever it activates). He can't control it in the moment, so he takes steps to preemptively push it down, to avoid the use of his abilities entirely, to hide himself away.

I talked a bit in a previous post about how there are probably several interrelated reasons for Vash's chronically avoidant behaviour, but I'd like to throw one more into the ring and suggest that it's not just a matter of not deserving to want things, but maybe also that he's afraid of wanting. That if he allows himself to even think about what he wants personally that he'll want too much, take too much, and that the only cure in his mind for this is to give and give repeatedly.

I wonder how starved he is for love. Vash loves hard, after all. Once he loves (and I’m not talking about the broad, distant love/compassion he has in general), for better or worse, he carries them around with him forever, long after they've passed. Does he feel like it'd be selfish to admit this kind of want? His love isn't really a passive thing after all - it's the drive at his very core; a mournful inferno he is just barely suppressing. Does he remember how to love in a way that doesn't consume him entirely?

Is that part of the reason he checks out at signs of intimacy? Diverts gifts towards others? Tends to accept kind gestures only when under an assumed name? Intentionally starves himself in Tristamp? Runs and runs and runs? Is he afraid he won't be able to stop hungering? That allowing himself to want means his want will become insatiable?

I just have to wonder how much of his avoidance of connection is being scared that he will cause more destruction (to them? or to him?) by trying to take far too much into his hands than he ever caused by turning his back and running.

...of course I may just be entirely deranged here sorry.

#yeah idk either i wrote this in a haze at 1 am #also i have not yet finished trimax so idk how these kinds of matters are going to be tackled or if i am way off base #if nothing else this kind of reads like one of my guilt spirals and writing it out made me realize how batshit insane i must sound #outside of my own head so if nothing else i guess it was kind of useful for that? #anyways. vash's solution to being hungry all the time is to pretend he isn't hungry for so long he doesn't know what he craves anymore #incredible. #on that note by contrast i'm intrigued by meryl and milly ordering their trademark food and drink with such confidence #also i do love how this fear of a part of himself conflicts so strongly with how incredibly confident he is otherwise #cool character choices you know? #aghhh ok i guess i'll post this before i chicken out. i can always delete it if i hate it after #trigun #trimax #tristamp #vash the stampede #storyrambles

[unproduciblesmackdown]

set out to create a serious, canonesque drawing with which to say "feel free to go in my lackadaisy tag and help me mystery speculate" but only got going when i made it bowling and the rarepair agenda

#not that i imagine anything w/mordecai's Rare so much as: diluted range of possibilities lol. probably someones on that mordecai/virgil life #when it turns out it takes several tries to start to get more solid footing at drawing characters for the first time: What The????? #i actually don't think i ever tried drawing lackadaisy before; against all odds....if i had i would've had a head start lol #lackadaisy #corned beef #any collectively used pairing name here? mordenico? nicodecai? in absence of otherwise Knowing: #nicodeme savoy #mordecai heller #me in '07 going oh my GOD this ART!!!! me in '23 going oh my GOD this ART!!!! & guess how i've always felt years in between #goddd perusing the gallery bonus art afresh recently just like WOWWW i'm SOOO #the collages of full-body drawings for book purchases i think like my GOD i love to see it. plus that the Extra Stuff gallery means there's #such a variety like. stuff that's clearly noncanon; stuff that could be / kinda is; jokes; portraits; story / characters insight....waaughh #also shoutout to everyone behind all the mordecais in KS Backer Art 1 & 2 like ''sexy mordecai please'' apparently lmao. hell yeah #anyways my Marigold Bowling Team headcanons are simple and straightforward: nicodeme w/the muscle can get a strike from the force of having #hit one pin that smashes into all the others; but don't underestimate his versatility. mordecai with the precision / method & absolutely #who you want trying to hit the only pin left on the lane. serafine's got like serpentine curveballs changing velocity halfway down the lane #and they've All got pointing a gun at the people setting pins / returning balls b/c that wasn't automated back in the twenties #back when everyone had customized printed tees....oh fun fact. a real live kitty cat crinkled that first pic's paper by jumping on it #or really; ricocheting off of it. classic #also the ''i want people to seriously consider nicodeme/mordecai. but also sillily'' purposes have me using Close Contact as a shorthand #it's earnest and can sure be [longhand] too but you go ''You Could Never HC Datingly Affection ft. An Always Touch Averse Character'' & i? #well i scoff derisively and slowly swivel my chair around to face you; arms crossed; smhing....hah. how greatly you underestimate my power. #you're throwing [hcs for a romance ft. an autistic character] & [that ft. an asexual character] & i'm grabbing them midair & Sips Them #ha ha why these replenish my health And experience bars.... #Never Be Afraid To Forget To Draw Mordecai's Glasses Or That You Also Put Your Thumb In A Bowling Ball....he's warming up. or w/e. #nicodeme w/the boxing experience shoulders massage trope. giving that pep talk #or you can go ''get a strike or we kill you'' b/c you never have to find out if he's joking or not #mordecai unfazed b/c that's the stakes in this business (bowling) & he's autistic so always having to ignore Everyone being weird/confusing #haven't come up with a lackadaisy's team bowling pun name lol. #still feel free to go in my lackadaisy tag and help me brainstorm mitzi n mordecai's murder mystery ;w; enrichment

[autistic-beshelar]

ah yes dungeon meshi, the manga where an autistic man gets repeatedly bullied by people he thinks are his friends and not a single person supports him

#dont get me wrong i am enjoying this manga #but i'm failing to see how this is some great amazing autistic rep #like yeah laios is obviously autistic #and the struggles he has due to his autism are VERY relatable #but it's deeply uncomfortable that even the people closest to him are routinely awful to him #specifically for his autistic traits #and their bullying is almost always a joke #not a single person defends him #literally senshi is the only character that's never been cruel to him #well and farlyn but lbr she's also autistic and also has been in like half a chapter that ive read so far #maybe ive just not read far enough or not seen enough posts #but im not understanding why the fandom are treating it like amazing autistic rep and how it understands us so well #you could argue that the narrative tends to support laios's methods and way of thinking #but nothing else does #the scene with shuro was fucking awful to read tbh #'you're so annoying because you're autistic. how dare you think im your friend when you should have just guessed that i hated you' #and not a single person defends laios #or calls shuro out on what a fucking horrific way of treating a party member that is #like i dont know MAYBE you could have just said 'hey i don't really want to be friends' #maybe you could COMMUNICATE. #but no it's the autistic man who's the problem. for the crime of.... being too nice. #i don't have a problem with the scene. #i have a problem with the fact that shuro is framed as reasonable here. instead of utterly fucking vile. #i have a problem with none of the other characters sticking up for laios. #dungeon meshi #maybe ppl will start treating him better #i would like to continue reading #but if he continues getting bullied in EVERY fucking chapter as a 'joke' then idk man

[shmorp-mcdurgen]

HSH AU MASTERPOST

Going ahead and making a master-post SPECIFICALLY for the Home Sweet Home au, (made by both me and @anotherr-side), due to the fact its still ongoing and has. a lot to it. So I hope this helps with finding anything you need if you're new to the au!

(Everything below the cut, as. it's a long one.)

****UPDATE ON THE SERIES****

^^^READ BEFORE GOING FORWARD^^^

FICS

This is where I recommend you start when looking for things for this au, as the main events, concepts, and characters will be introduced here. (In recommended reading order.)

(CONTENT WARNINGS ARE LISTED ON EACH FIC. HEED THE WARNINGS.)

-Descent (pre vol 1)

-Prologue/Vol 1: Home is Where the Heart is

-The Phone Call (pre vol 2 teaser)

-Vol 2: Barotrauma

-Encounter

-Interview Transcript 1 (Leah Heathcliff)

-Interview Transcript 2 (Arthur Heathcliff)

-Vol 3: Radio Silence

-Martyrdom

-█████████

-Journal Entry (Shepherd's Tone teaser)

-Shepherd's Tone

-Remorse.

-What then?

Don't turn that dial now. There's more to come. :)

-----

REFERENCES

These are the character references! Now these WILL include spoilers to the fics, so. I recommend reading those first BEFORE looking at the refs. but if you have, then here they are!

Mark Heathcliff: Pre vol 1 events, (here's another drawing of him thats a bit less outdated)

Cesar Torres: (not much here at the moment. but don't fret. you'll see him eventually.)

Maria Torres: Post Vol 1

Sarah Heathcliff: ref made by rufus (anotherr-side), Official ref by me, along with Jonah's design

Evelin Miller: (N/A) (yet.)

Adam Murray: Pre vol 2 events

Jonah Marshall: (see Sarah's.)

Dave Lee: Post Encounter

Thatcher Davis: Post Vol 3

Ruth Weaver: Pre Vol 3

Mr and Mrs Heathcliff: (N/A)

Zero: (reference)

Her: Home ref 1, Home interior, The Clock.

Her Guests. (references)

Her Host. (reference, plus "Starved" version.)

-----

MISCELLANEOUS

Teasers and other smaller things.

-Vol 2/au teaser "trailer"

-Shorter vol 2 video teaser

-HAVE YOU SEEN US?

-The Belly of the Beast (vol 2 teaser/Home's basement ref)

-ITEM EXHIBITION 1

-ITEM EXHIBITION 2

-Mark's Soliloquy

-The Perpetrator.

-The Martyr (Martyrdom Teaser)

-Sarah Heathcliff video teaser

-Cesar's drawing

-Vol 3 Teaser image 1

-Vol 3 Teaser 2

-The Fate of the Jester

-Home SCP article (non canon)

-The Bells Toll for Me.

-Dove Messenger convo

-Prophet.

#the mandela catalogue #mandela catalogue #tmc #unreality #tmc home sweet home au #<if you need any general info on characters and events and whatnot look through this tag! everything important should be there #This au is legit. my favorite au that i've worked on and i'm happy to see that people enjoy it. Rufus and I have worked hard on this :) #But yeah!! if you're confused on what this au is I hope this can help you figure it out!! #After all. you're always welcome here. you know that. right?

[yandere-daydreams]

Current thoughts on Neuvillette and Furina?

the moment i saw them on screen together i was overcome with fantasies of the Most Austic Threesome ever penned to the hollowed halls of ao3. i have been been plagued with visions ever since.

#fgdkg no seriously tho i really like them #i just started working on the new update last night and i'm only finished with the prologue and first chapter but #i really like all the new character T-T #furina is definitely my favorite (we support girlfails unconditionally in this house) #she's such a nice juxtaposition to the sorta prestige of the other archons #and i am in love with the fact that her subjects are basically just like 'yeah she kinda sucks but we stan her' #navia is also a stand-out and the magician twins are cute #glad to see arlecchino is embracing fatherhood #i don't know much about neuvillette yet but then again i'm always down for a little dragon fucking #we'll get to that in time tho #personal #anon aks

[yuseirra]

if there's one thing I personally focus on when I draw something, it would be the emotions. I try to convey the exact emotions of a character when I make art, and portray how they'd be feeling at that exact situation, as they say something, and so on...

I try to feel the same feelings they would when I draw an expression, as close as I can get at least, it's what I do over and over. You don't really have to do that ofc, but for me, it's a huge part of the point and it's really fun to do! It's what I believe could give my drawings more life and make them more genuine, even if it's a sketch (in fact, sometimes sketches can be more powerful on that aspect so I used to stick to drawing exclusively those for a very long time). That's how I pour my heart in, and I'm sure a lot of artists would do the same in their own ways when they create their works.

For that same reason, I really like drawing smiles (and characters that can make genuine ones) because that makes me happy. Other feelings are cool, too, but drawing happy art is so soothing, so I draw a lot of smiles!! It's also why I feel the need to understand a character, because you can't exactly feel what they'd be feeling unless you aren't so aware of what they're going through. I wouldn't be entirely right, I'm sure, but I really want to try. It's maybe why I usually stick to drawing a select few characters from a series all the time, because there are some characters I "get" better than others, and feel I can bring out better(and most of the time, luckily, those kinds of characters end up to be my favs, so I can draw then alot ;v;) Then again, I'm seeing them through my own lens of thinking, I'm just putting out what I see in those characters in the end. But it's usually the good things I love! Or something I feel is really intriguing and want to think about, or want to explore on, emphasize? Anyhow, it's the feelings and emotions part I've always been interested about! So I hope I can do that well!

My drawings aren't perfect, but they aren't too bad either, and I've been trying all the way. If they could imbue some sort of feeling for you, that's definitely what I wanted to accomplish! It makes me so excited when I get feedbacks about it being able to make someone "feel" something.. it means what I wanted got across so I'm like "yes"!!

it'd be nice if they will feel genuine one way or another!! I was and is and will be happy to continue to share my works with you all

#random blabbering #hehe #I recently got really nice tags and I #I kind of want to go and thank ppl individually for that but I was out of energy... I missed the timing.. #drawing makes me think about feelings #characters too #so I really like seeing characters that can make big genuine smiles from the heart #ofc I love other types of characters too #but sometimes you just need to think about that kind of feeling and it exists #and I love characters that are literal saints right.. those kind of characters have always been my favs #they are very inspiring and thinking-not just thinking but trying to feel how they would be feeling..is really good for the soul I think #I wish I could be strong like them and genuinely feel like that #(you could a little as you draw #being immersed is very nice #and I hope what I draw could be that way for someone #here I am writing at midnight..I don't know if what I'm writing's making good sense but wish you all the best #thank you for seeing my drawings together with me!! #I CAN draw some self-indulgent stuff that'd not exactly cater to be educational or inspiring yeah but #I probably won't mean bad. I want to have fun~which I've been!! for so long

[fourteenthz]

man...... man. 30 tags are not enough so under the read more I go

these screenshots are what ALWAYS got me about Thancred's character. like yeah all the scions trust you and all that but Thancred is just so loyal in a completely different way than others might be. specially after shadowbringers like he always try to do things together and it's always the "there's no other way" that he let's the wol do their thing - and still he's always the one to go to them after the deed is done and to sacrifice whatever it takes for the deed to,, you know, be done or whatever

and what I find sooo charming about all of it is that he's so discreet about it all. he very rarely goes out of his way to express his feelings to you or whatever but then you have moments where Ryne talks about the things he said about the WOL and he truly hates her leaving her side (because he's a terrible worrier) but MAN the trust the "As long as she accompanied you." shows just. man.

The whole "it's not about your blessing" is just such a perfect example as well, to his loyalty and faith. It was never for what the Scions had for him, just about their story together and the trust he has earned in that time.PLUS because his view of the world has slightly changed here, he's the "I've done bad things" kind of character but in a "I need to do better form now on" and not the "I'm done for" YOU KNOW? he's just so sincere in his need to just do better and half of the time that makes him have a difficult time coming to terms with that really is right but man. man. He wants to do it. The "tell me what I must do" to Minfilia is SUCH a perfect example. His sacrifice is not martyr-like, it's trial and error until he gets it right, for everybody, not just him. He's not doing it alone, he needs help!! He knows that!! And it SUCKS because he's so used to being better off alone!! But it's the entirety of shb of him saying "we're in this together" that ALMOST feels like he's convincing himself of that AT LEAST until he has to deal with it by himself, and then MAN if he DOES IT and he comes back like "now I can fix things. better even." HES SO

There are far too many traits of perfectionism in him, in the worst ways. He doesn’t know how to deal with his feeling at the beginning of shb, everything seems to get under his skin because it always keeps reminding him of the past he lived/the wrongs he has done/ the things he failed - BUT despite it all, he has time to care so deeply about the First's cause and Minfilia's and even the WOL's to the point were he is always make sure they know: they are together, that if their blessing fails they know the WOL won't, and if they do, it doesn't matter because AGAIN; they are together.

Playing ng+ and knowing how thancred ends in this expansion is so nice, you can clearly point out the signs of his change and signs that he didn't change at all. How he's always the one to take charge and lead when the WOL isn't around, he makes sure to teach that to Ryne ("Thancred once told me that if the efforts to summon you failed, it would fall to me to face the Lightwardens"), how he deals with change so promptly but fails to really express all of it ("I have no doubt that he understands. The question is how he feels.") He's flawed, he knows that but MAN if he doesn't try to fix that.

#this post makes NO sense like ALL of my tags so pls don't consider this anything formal besides me rambling #I wanted to make this unrbed BUT it's under read more and if ppl want to rb just the screenshots it's fine #I just............ UGHDFGLSFIATFG MAN. he's so HES SO #haven't even got to /his part/ in shb yet but everything he says makes me want to CRY I just ADORE him he's so tailored to me specifically #90% of this applies to my hcs abt my wol and when he turned out like that I was like “YEAH THAT'S WERE WE ARE GOING ALRIGHT” #also I'M NOT DONE WITH IT but putting this here in the tags bc endwalker spoilers bc: this is why his visit to the WOL room in EW just hits #so hard. HE KNOWS what is at stake HE ALWAYS HAD and he's so realistic about it but that was the one time he went “I need help” #he's discreet about loving the scions and his NEED to protect everybody he loves because that's how it has always been to him #(him seeing minfilia safe from work everynight when they were young etc etc) #and in ew he really goes “hey i trust you guys with my life and MAN I hope it's mutual so if it is please do this thing I can't do for me?” #IT MAKES ME SICK #i have so many screenshots this ng+ that's just text bubbles and it's mostly him and ryne talking about him and and just these points were #get “oh. there he is. my most special man.” #I'm so normal about characters that repent but not in a martyr way. YEAH LIFE IS A BURDEN YOU GOTTA LIVE IT TO MAKE THE MOST OF IT YEAH #everyday I think rn thancred is far away from the scions and ryne it makes me want to throw a fist. anyway. #kelly says #kelly plays xiv #thancred waters #(for me. I hope this doesn't appear in the tags since it's far down here LOL) #5.0 spoilers

[noritaro]

if im more honest and open about the reasons why i like some fictional characters I'd be put on a watch list for being a deranged cringy weirdo my GOD

#rambles #always ridiculous reasons #I'm NAWT saying that shit out loud man #i always say 'yeah i don't know either' when someone asks me why i like a fav character #no i know why it's just too embarrassing for me to admit out loud so I'm lying #this was in my drafts #for several months

[dazais-guardian-angel]

kinda wild to me that one of the most compelling aspects of both Chuuya and Kunikida's characters to me, that I never really see talked about, is how they're heavily set on a doomed crash course towards complete and utter destruction, and how I am so, so worried for them both.....

#bungou stray dogs #been thinking a lot about chuuya lately (shocking for me i know (said with no sarcasm truly lmao it is rare for me)) #cause of the 15 manga and also playing the fucking jeht quest in genshin impact ugh (where's the one dual genshin bsd fan who Understands) #but like this pressure has been building up for chuuya for so long due to being used and manipulated by all these people #first the sheep then mori then verlaine then still mori now #he was groomed since childhood just like dazai #but unlike dazai he didn't have an oda to help him get out of the mafia........ he's still stuck there #and his personality is different from dazai's. dazai was more self-aware imo (but still a groomed emotionally abused kid don't get me wrong #but chuuya's whole thing is needing to belong and wanting a leader to be loyal to but ending up in positions of leadership himself #which makes him feel pressured but he accepts and stifles any negative feelings just because he wants to belong #and all this crushed him with the events in the light novels and yeah he went through character growth but he's...... Still In The Mafia... #and that fucking scene asagiri added to the cannibalism stage play i don't think hardly anyone even knows about bc IT'S NOT DISCUSSED ANYMO #where mori emotionally manipulates him with the flags!!! and it deeply hurts him!!! and he presumably deals with that shit all the time!!! #it is WORRISOME. it WORRIES ME okay. #chuuya doesn't have anyone who can save him from the mafia (dazai is in no position to okay; it's all he can do just to try to save himself #and it's so so scary. it spells awful things for him. #didn't asagiri say he'd have a rough path or something??? and he added that fucking scene in the play!!! it haunts me!! #i fully expected this shit to hit a turning point in the meursault arc but we can't have nice things i guess #and as for kunikida a;lskdfl (took me this long to get to him oop) literally the ending of Entrance Exam (the novel) is just #One Big Foreshadowing for Kunikida's downfall #he's compared to the azure king for a reason. Sasaki saw the azure king in him for a reason. it's fucking worrying!!!!! #there hasn't really been anything like that since in the manga (just like for chuuya lol ugh) but he's TERRIBLE at coping with his trauma #and it only gets more apparent once shit hit the fan in the doa/hunting dogs/meursault arc #it's not good!!! i'm worried for kunikida too!!!! #even if the manga isn't focusing on this these worries are always in the back of my mind man #both kunikida and chuuya are doomed to hit some kind of breaking point eventually and i await those moments with dread yet anticipation #i want dazai to be able to save kunikida from the despair being too good a person brings the way he couldn't save oda #and chuuya.... if we get a scene with him & mori mirroring the one in dark era where dazai finds out that mori orchestrated the kids' death #oh man i think i'll fucking die (give it to me i need to cry)