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chelleztjs18 · 11 months

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Night Time Shenanigans (W.M)

Wanda Maximoff x Female!AvengersReader

Summary: A fun night time snack run with your girlfriend.

Warning: None. Just a fluffy one.

Requested: Yes

A/n: Knock knock! It's another fluff fic with Wanda here! Thank you Curious George anon for the help during the process of writing on this one especially the corny ideas. haha. Happy reading!

Main Masterlist

Pietro slowly parks the car at the parking spot of the store that you want to go to. “Okay, y/n, we are here. Are you sure you want to go inside? I don’t mind going and getting the snacks everybody wants.” His blue eyes look at you in the back seat through the mirror.

“Oh yeah, I’m fine. I’m okay. I can find all the snacks.” you answer drunkenly as you tap his shoulders then get out of the car.

“But, you are drunk, y/n.” you ignore Pietro’s disagreement despite you can hear it from the open window of his car. “Sestra, are you gonna let her go by herself?” He added the question towards her twin sister.

“Oh course not, Piet. I’ll go with her.” Wanda replies and gets out of the car to catch you up.

Surprisingly, the world has been in pretty good peace. No aliens nor villains attack whatsoever lately, so you and your teammates have been having chances to relax and spend time together. Tonight is movie night with some drinking of course and right now you are a little more buzzed than usual.

You scurry your steps while trying not to be obvious that you are searching for your balance at the same time. Your eyes actively search where the snacks aisle is because everybody craves potato chips which you don’t understand why they want salty snacks when they are drunk.

Unlike the others, you crave crackers and anything sweet. So when you find the crackers and cookies aisle, you definitely forget your main destination.

Meanwhile Wanda is looking for you as she pushes the shopping cart. She knows you very well by now from dating you for more than two years and she goes straight to where she is sure where you are at now.

“There you are. Detka, you didn’t wait for me. I was looking for you.” She says as soon as she finds you looking around for your favorite.

“Babe, we’re crack-a-lackin!” you exclaimed. You are a quiet person when you are sober but when you are drunk, not so much. Alcohol usually gives you more confidence and makes you more at ease. Caught off guard with your pretty loud pun at the silent store, it slows her brain down to process it. Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion for a few seconds.

“Get it, babe? Crack-a-lackin? You know, cracker- lacking because they don’t have the crackers that I like.” you explained.

The brunette Avengers playfully rolls her eyes and holds a smile as soon as she understands what you were trying to say. “You and your puns.” she giggles.

“What about the crackers that I gave you two days ago, you liked that one.” your girlfriend suggests as she rubs your back gently. “Nope, they don’t have it either.” You continue walking through the aisle.

“How about your favorite chocolate cookies?” She pitches another piece of advice to you.

“No, Nada, zilch. I looked for that too. Is it a National crackers and cookies day or something? How come they don’t have the good stuff here, why did people buy them all?” You rambled and pouted at the same time.

“Well, we can try other brands of cookies or different flavors.” Wanda adds as her eyes try to find other cookies that you might like.

“How about this—” before even Wanda can finish her question, she gets interrupted with the fact that you are not there with her.

“Y/n?” With a deep sigh, she walks to find you.

_____

As luck would have it, you are only an aisle away from her. Her heart smiles when she sees you examining the sweets shelves with a bag of M&M chocolates in your hands.

“What you got there?” she asks.

“Oh M&M and you know what, Wands? I think I’m like M&M.” your hooded eyes look at her confused green eyes.

“And, why is that?” Wanda asks in bewilderment.

“Because I also melt in your hands.” you stated your corny lines with a wink as you put the bag of treats in the carts.

She instantly snorts a laugh. “Oh my god, y/n. That was so cheesy.” she shakes her head a little and follows where you are going.

Wanda stops to pick up some chocolaty goodies for herself. Then she hears some rushed steps only to find you run back to her and you hide both of your hands behind your back. All smiling like a proud little kid who has a surprise for you.

“What do you have in your hands, baby?” she asks shortly before you hand her a bag of Hershey's kisses. “Don’t ever say I never give you kisses.” you playfully declared.

Wanda can’t help herself to laugh and this time she laughs louder.

“Well then I would ask for some more right now.” Wanda excitedly demands with a teasing smirk followed by her index finger gently taps her lips. You lean to her, letting your face get closer. right when your lips get close enough to hers, you stop and say “Oh Wanda, of course you’ll get some more kisses, I can’t ever Reese-ist that.” You waggle your eyebrows in a frisky way.

Wanda lets out a pretend gasp as her cheeks slowly turn color to a rosie shade. She batted her eyebrows in disbelief followed by another laugh. “Oh–my–god, babe! Sometimes I forget how corny you are.”

You look at her, adoring her smile and every single feature of her face. Her laughter sounds like the most beautiful melody ever exists. “Gosh Wanda, you are so gorgeous.” it takes a second for your lips to reach hers. Both of you smile on each other's lips after the kiss.

“Y/n, sweetie. That was very lovely. As much as I love our kiss but we still have to get the snacks and chips for the others.” Her fingers fix your hair a little, she lovingly smiles. Helplessly, in love with you and your dorkiness.

“Ah, yeah, right. Snacks and chips. Oh take a look at this, Wands! I'll get this for Natasha." You agreed but a few steps after, you got distracted with something and it reminds you of your red haired best friend.

"Truffle? I don't know that Nat likes chocolate truffles." A line appears between her eyebrows, as she squints with confusion.

"I don't know if she likes them either. I'm getting this just so I can say 'I knew you were truffle when you walked in' to her when I give it to her later." You patch a smile talking about your plan with Wanda.

“Ouh yeah, that’s a good one. I wanna see Nat’s face when you do that. So yeah get that chocolate truffle babe.” Wanda looks as excited as you are now and she is fully on board with it and then the two of you wander around.

As both of you two reach the cereal aisle, without hesitation you turn your way in and your girlfriend patiently follows you. Her mind automatically put milk in her imaginary shopping list if you are getting some cereals as well.

Then suddenly you halt yourself. “Oooh, my love, look! This is so you!” You grab a box off the shelf.

“Honey Nut Cheerio? Why?” she tilts her head a little, her brain trying to solve your pun-puzzle like usual.

“Well, you are my Honey and sometimeeeess just sometimes you can be a little ‘Nuts’ or weird on certain thing BUT not in a bad way though. So you are my Honey Nut.” your fingers form an air quote at the word Nuts while you carefully explain what you mean on your joke.

Wanda laughs at your antics. “Ooookaaaay, that’s a funny nickname. I can live with that and you know what? that makes you my sweet corn-pun.”

“Excuse me? your what?” you playfully ask.

“My sweet is because I always call you that. Corn-pun is because your puns you gave me have been pretty corny and I love them.”

“Hey now, I’m not corny.” you pretend that you are slightly offended by showing the fake pout on your blushing face.

“Malyshka, I let you call me Nuts, so it will be only fair if you let me call you corny.” she giggles and winks at the same time.

“Ah, okay okay. Fair enough. Gosh your brother will make fun of me so bad if he knows you are calling me corny.” you agree in defeat.

“Oh trust me, y/n. He will.” Wanda tries to hold a laugh on the funny thoughts. With that the two of you proceed to the chips aisle.

You and Wanda grab the chips that everybody wants, you are sobering up a little and the cart starts to get full. You are glad that you went to the store with Wanda. Your girlfriend’s cheeks feel tired from smiling and laughing a lot because of your jokes and puns. It’s her reason why she loves you, you always make her laugh and smile no matter what. Both of you even forgot that Pietro is waiting in the car for so long already until the silver haired Sokovian calls his twin sister.

A call from Pietro and a few text conversations with Natasha later, Wanda can’t find you anywhere near her. Aisle after aisle, she searches for you. She keeps guessing where you would be but she has no luck finding you. She gives up and just right before Wanda decides to use her magic to find you, she remembers one last aisle that she is sure that’s where you are at now.

And, Wanda was right. She found you at the toy aisle, looking at two boxes of Lego sets on each of your hands. She noticed that you look as indecisive as you were when you tried to decide the matching tattoos you have with Wanda. She knows how much you love Lego and tattoos. You love them so much that you have too many choices to pick out.

“My sweet.” Wanda greets you as she smiles with such adoration.”

“Hm?” You answer knowingly it was her while you observe the two boxes in your hands. Your eyebrows furrowed, your gaze carefully bounced left and right.

“Getting yourself more legos? What are the choices this time?” Wanda asks as she stands closer to you and the boxes float in the air with her red magic tendrils around it so she can check out your dilemmas.

“Oh, I’m debating between these Bowser sets or the Electric Guitar one. Both of them will be so much fun to build but the Bowser one will take longer than the other one.” you explain and you start to pour a little.

“Aw pumpkin. Why don’t you get both of them? I have Tony’s card anyway.” Wanda casually pitches the idea.

“Well, it’s never really about the price, Wands. It’s more about how long it takes to get them done. Sometimes I want to finish it fast but not too fast either, you know.”

“But you like and you want both of them, right?” another question comes out of Wanda’s lips

“Uh, yes.”

“Well, in that case, we are getting you both of these sets. Take your time on building it and I will help you sometimes if you want, y/n. I love Legos too and you enjoy it when we are doing it together anyway.” Both boxes float away then gently land into the shopping cart.

“Let's start one of them tonight as soon as we get back at the compound.” Her face lights up with excitement. She is very much sure that you would love her idea.

“Oh yeah, that’s a great idea, Wanda. Sam and Bucky will pick the movie tonight and they always choose horror movies. You never like scary movies.”

“Uh huh. So, let’s go. Before Pietro comes here looking for us and takes us to the car with his power.” Wanda grabs your hand and walks with you while her magic pushes the shopping cart around.

_____

“Your savior is here!” you exclaim as you walk in holding bags of snacks in one hand and your girlfriend’s hand in your other. All your teammates cheer for your arrival.

“Anyway, y/n and I decided to call it a night. We will just chill in our room.” Wanda announces with her obvious thick accent.

You hear them expressing their disappointment. “I know, I know but we don’t like scary movies and we know that Bucky and Sam will pick one plus I just got new legos.” You explain casually as you hand each of them their snacks and intentionally leave Nat’s snack as the last one to be handed out.

“Where’s mine, y/n?” Nat curiously peeks inside the bag then looks at you.

“Oh don’t worry Natty. Here you go.” you give her the snacks with a knowing smirk and being your best friend for years, she knows that you are up to no good. Even though you are a quiet person most of the time, you love joking around here and there especially with Natasha.

“What? What’s up with the smirk?” The red haired Avengers confidently shows her suspicions through her tone and question.

“Nothing. I got you some sweets too.” You pull out the chocolate truffles you got her and Wanda secretly excited to see how her reactions are going to be while internally holding her giggles.

“Awww, y/n, that’s so nice—” Natasha’s gratitude got interrupted by you.

“I knew you were truffles when you walked in, Nat.” you put them in her hand. Confused, Natasha’s gaze flicks between you and the truffles.

The team laughs at the same time with her finally realizing what your pun means.

“Haha. Very funny. You better run now Y/n, before I give you trouble and kick your ass!” Natasha plays along.

“Welp, gotta dash! Come on babe!” You grab Wanda’s hand then sprint to your room followed by Natasha.

Of course, your girlfriend came to the rescue. As she giggles at the situation, Wanda suddenly stops and uses her magic on Natasha. In a blink, Natasha floats and then lands on the couch as if she is held hostage.

“Wanda!! This is not fair! Let me kick your girlfriend’s ass!” You hear Natasha demand her freedom from Wanda’s magic.

“Sorry, Nat! Nobody can kick my Y/n. The magic will be gone in fifteen minutes.” Wanda answers from afar.

“What?? Oh come on! I can’t even eat my snacks and the freaking truffle for fifteen minutes?!” Natasha complains at the same time as the others laugh but you know she is far away from being upset with you, well you hope so.

“That was so funny. Come on detka, let’s build your legos.” Wanda laughs. She holds your hands and continues her power walk to your shared bedroom.

A/n: Welp, thats it for today! let me know what you think. Reblogs and comments are highly appreciated. Follow me for more. See you in next!

Cheerio!

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#wanda maximoff #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff x y/n #marvel fanfiction #elizabeth olsen #wanda maximoff fluff #avengers au #wanda maximoff fanfic #wanda maximoff fanfiction #wanda maximoff imagine #wanda x reader

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thepringlesofblood · 3 months

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An Attempt at Explaining Bulbian Church Theology

so I watched ACOC a year or two ago, and I watched TRW as it came out, and now I’m going back and re-watching ACOC with that context in mind, and I have many questions.

a few disclaimers

this shit rules. it’s wild how much thought and effort Brennan & Matt put into Bulbian theology and the history and inner workings of the church. at no point am I implying anything to the contrary. this is “tf, guys? (affectionate)” not “tf, guys? (derogatory)”

the order of things is fucked up bc prequel, and bc Matt necessarily did a bunch of it w/out Brennan bc he was a PC. some things have the simple Doylist explanation of “Brennan didn’t think they were ever coming back to that bit” or “it’s a metric fuckload of lore written several years before Matt came onto the project, of course some things are going to contradict.” I know and agree with these reasons. I am coming at this from as Watsonian a perspective as I can - trying to find in-world reasons for things rather than real-life reasons - because I think it’s a fun thought exercise.

at no point am I talking shit about either Brennan or Matt. ik people have a lot of feelings about Matt’s DMing in TRW, but I think he did great, and he added some fascinating new lore about the theology of Calorum which I am eager to sink my teeth into. he seems like a cool dude, he and Brennan wrote some extremely cool lore, and that’s all I’ll say about that.

so. let’s get crack-a-lackin’

Let’s define our terms.

we got our two Big Terms from ACOC - the Prophidian Heresy and the Ramsian Doctrine. The Prophidian Heresy is the only one to re-appear in TRW, as the Prophidian Theodicy. this is bc it was not declared to be heresy (aka fake/against the church’s beliefs) yet, so it was just another theory within the church

we’ve got about four big factions, very unequal in power:

Belizabeth Brassica (& the church under her rule)

the Sanctis Putris

the Archbishop Camille Colliflour (aka the Avatar of Deus Pa’Zuul)

The Few Good Individuals in The Church*

we’re mostly talking about Brassica and Sanctis Putris.

*Saint Citrina, local churches in Candia, certain Bulbians in the Dairy Islands, individual churches here and there across the continent that are mentioned as rejecting the Ramsian Doctrine in ACOC.

The Prophidian Heresy/Theodicy

What it says:

The Hungry One is just as powerful as The Bulb

Reasoning:

this is an attempt to explain the questions of “if the Bulb is good and all-powerful, why are there bad things in the world? If the Bulb is more powerful than the Hungry One, why hasn’t it beat the shit out of him yet, if it is truly a force for good?”

What it means in the world:

this is a part of Brassica’s plot to start the apocalypse, but is not the most important thing for her.

It is however important for the beliefs of the Sanctis Putris, who fight to keep the Hungry One at bay.

Questions/observations:

In ACOC Ep.13, when Brennan first mentions the Sanctis Putris, he describes them as “an order of the Church that did not subscribe to the Prophidian Heresy at all. It looks like they are not about the Ramsian Doctrine and causing the apocalypse.”

I think this is a mixing up of words, and that he meant to say “the Ramsian Doctrine” both times, since the Sanctis Putris is against the Ramsian Doctrine. at this point in the campaign the two beliefs have gotten kind of conflated bc they’re both part of the big Brassica Apocalypse Plot.

the in-world explanation could be that after the war the Sanctis Putris pivoted to a different belief - perhaps that the Hungry One is more powerful than the Bulb. very interesting...

in TRW ep 3 Colliflour says “We know the clarity of the Prophidian Theodicy and the terrible shadow that grows outside of the Bulb's light”

so we do know that before the war at least the Sanctis Putris were into it.

The Ramsian Doctrine

What it says:

The Hungry One cannot be destroyed and the final salvation of all souls cannot occur until the Hungry One devours the world

Some souls are healthy and delicious, but some are unhealthy and garbage - Junk Food (Candians)

The Junk Food souls prevent the Hungry One from devouring the world because it wants a “healthy meal”

Reasoning:

in order to work towards this prized final salvation of all souls and destruction of the Hungry One, one must first work towards the apocalypse. Junk Food must be eradicated from the world for that to happen - whether by conversion to the Bulbian faith* or by death.

*it’s at least implied by Calroy’s letter to Brassica in ep. 13 that since he “renounced his pagan ways” and wants to be re-baptized in the Bulbian faith, he gets to live. whether this is true or not we do not find out.

What it means in the world:

This is the excuse Brassica needs to invade and destroy Candia and its magic. Fun fact: she was actually planning to launch a crusade on the Meatlands too before she got got.

Meat isn’t junk food (i don’t think??), so it’s clear that what she’s really after is destroying the rest of Calorum’s ability to access magic - making it so they have to go through the church to get “miracles” rather than using the magic of the deities in their homelands. that’s not Ramsian, it’s just Brassica being power-hungry and mean.

In regards to the Sanctis Putris, they believe they are preventing the apocalypse by bringing rot and mold into the world. they don’t want the Hungry One to devour the world, and since they believe the Hungry One is as powerful as the Bulb, they want to work to bring mold and rot into the world themselves, to give the Bulb a leg up on the opposition, so to speak.

so, the idea that the Hungry One could devour the world, and that that would be a sort of apocalypse, is shared between Brassica and the Sanctis Putris. the difference is, Brassica wants that to happen so the Bulb can finally defeat the Hungry One, and the Sanctis Putris does not want that to happen, so they bring mold and rot into the world so the Hungry One can’t devour it.

Questions/observations:

So while it sounds kind of like the Sanctis Putris are buying into the last tenant of the Ramsian Doctrine - that the Hungry One will only eat a “healthy meal” - they’re not buying into the rest of it, because their definition of “healthy” is different from the one outlined in the rest of the Ramsian Doctrine. The Sanctis Putris don’t seem to care about “Junk Food”, just rot & mold.

TRW ep. 3 Colliflour: “Through prosperity and peace, Calorum becomes ripe and pliable. It becomes the perfect meal to forever roil and burn within its belly. The hidden scripture, the Festered Tome, it holds the truth that will save us all. The Hungry One will not eat that which is spoiled...Only through death can the lands be stained and unclean. Only through rot can the world be saved and endure under the Great Bulb's light”

the Sanctis Putris depend on conflict vs peace and rot vs growth across the whole of Calorum, while the Ramsian Doctrine depends upon specific people (Candians) being eradicated

in ACOC ep. 13 Brennan says this “The correspondence between the Archbishop Oliver Onionpatch and the Sanctus Putris saying the Sanctus Putris has located the home and high temple of the Sugar-Plum Fairy, and have found the Ice Cream Temple. The date they give, they say that their expedition should arrive there the morning of Harvest Dawn the seventh”

onion boy is a Brassica lackey - a Ramsian. swapping letters with the Sanctis Putris, famously anti-Ramsian. ???

my question is this - why are the Sanctis Putris running errands for Brassica if they have fundamentally opposing beliefs? why are they sending out an expedition on the orders of someone trying to start an apocalypse that they’re trying to prevent?

3 potential reasons

blackmail - Brassica says “I am the head of the Church, this is what’s happening, put up or shut up. Do what I want or I eradicate you”

quid pro quo - a favor for a favor, Brassica is giving them something in exchange for them doing this for her

common enemy

it serves the Sanctis Putris to have the Church be more powerful since a lot of their people are in the Church, and of course it serves Brassica to empower the Church. Killing the Sugar Plum Fairy is one way to do that.

im uncertain though, as the Sanctis Putris has people from all over the place, and potentially at least one Candian who is against it.

although, if the Sanctis Putris intend to split with Brassica, if may also not serve them to have the Church be more powerful.

Compare/contrasting Brassica v Sanctis Putris

Both beliefs are Prophidian, since for the Hungry One to eat everything it would need to be at least equal in power to the Bulb (both groups believe in the Bulb’s inherent goodness, and that if it had the power it would stop the Hungry One from doing this).

Both see themselves as helping the Bulb overpower the Hungry One, Brassica by causing the Apocalypse and the Sanctis Putris by preventing it.

Both identify an aspect of the world that is preventing the Hungry One from devouring it. Brassica points to “junk food”, while the Sanctis Putris points to mold and rot.

I saw a post a while back that positioned the two terms as Belizabeth Brassica’s beliefs vs the beliefs of the Sanctis Putris. This is not the case.

The Ramsian Doctrine [in its totality] is exclusive to Brassica, yes, but the Prophidian Heresy does not encompass the totality of the beliefs of the Sanctis Putris. It just says that the Hungry One is as powerful as the Bulb. the rest of their shit is their own.

the Sanctis Putris do subscribe the last tenant of the Ramsian Doctrine (that the Hungry One wants a healthy meal), but interpret “healthy” as meaning something else, so I wouldn’t say their beliefs are Ramsian overall, even if one idea overlaps.

plus, Brassica also needs the Prophidian Heresy to exist, since it offers a reason for why the Bulb doesn’t just come down and make everything better - it can’t, since it and the Hungry One are equal in power.

now where the fuck does Deus Pa’Zuul fall into this?

Brennan described the feeling of discovering Deus Pa’Zuul as “eldritch horror” and frankly I agree. A lot of the genre of eldritch horror revolves around the unknown, and specifically the unknowable, so as a result we the audience know very little about it.

What we do know

it’s a garbage disposal, and all the implications that carries, included but not limited to

the place you dispose of rotten food

the physical description - blades, tearing, ripping, whirring

it is a force of pure destruction. the things it destroys are erased from existence. there is no eternity in the Hungry One’s stomach, no salvation in the light of the Bulb, you just end.

it can interact with the world of Calorum through visions and impart magic like the Bulb and the Hungry One do, but does so very, very rarely.

The only two Calorans we know of that it ever contacted directly were Colliflour and Raphaniel.

the rest of the Sanctis Putris had no clue that this was where their leader was taking them - Gemelli straight up fights it.

Speculations

while Colliflour certainly seems to think it fits into the main cosmology of the universe, it feels very clear, to me at least, that it does not.

the Hungry One and the Bulb have next to no physical manifestations in the world of Calorum the way Deus Pa’Zuul does.

sure, a spell might sound like a stomach rumble or emit holy light, but no one ever turns into a lightbulb.

The closest thing is that the Bulb is the Sun, but it remains untouchable and unknowable (until some crazy ass pepper shaker makes a spaceship or something).

the physicality of it makes me feel like it’s a smaller, though no less deadly, force than the Bulb and Hungry One.

there’s also the specificity - we’ve seen the magic of Bulb and Hungry One alike do a million different things. Deus Pa’Zuul’s magic seems less flexible - we only really hear it described or emphasized when Raphaniel casts a more destructive spell, like Shatter, and of course in the finale when it took over Colliflour’s body and the room around them.

(this is also probably bc TRW was a way shorter campaign and thus had much less opportunity to show off new fun ways for it to wreck shop)

The Bulb and the Hungry One are balanced - creation and destruction, light and dark. Deus Pa’Zuul feels like an extraplanar monster. I’d say “demon” but that implies that it’s working for the Hungry One, as he’s the Caloran equivalent of the Devil.

but then again, is that incorrect? in-world, it certainly feels separate from Bulb and Hungry One alike. but if we think about the implications of real-life garbage disposals...people are the ones that operate and control them. if the Hungry One is a person, he would be the one controlling what (and who) the disposal grinds up.

Finally, we have the Few Good Individuals in the Church.

Saint Citrina, in the limited scenes we have from her,

encourages Amethar to follow his heart and not divorce Catherine Ghee if he loves her.

creates a holy relic that forces you to tell the truth

has an argument with Archmage Lazuli about the goings-on with the Order of the Spinning Star

Queen Pamelia says in TRW ep. 1 - “Citrina and myself and many others have taken quite lovingly to the Book of Leaves. We just are careful with which sects of the church wish to impose disparate law and rule upon how we worship.”

later we see her sort of disagreeing with her mom as she is steered away from Raphaniel though, and we don’t really know what’s in the Book of Leaves, except that Saint Citrina enchanted it to force truth-telling at some point before her death.

is “useful” to Calroy and his conspirators until Brassica orders her killed. So, one can assume she was anti-Ramsian in some way.

We know that Primsy and most Dairy Islanders are Bulbian, but don’t get much of their specific beliefs.

There is the scene in the Abbey of the Shimmering Cream with Saccharina, where we basically just learn that that abbey (and potentially area in general) is extremely anti-magic and terrible. We don’t get anything about their feelings vis-a-vis the Ramsian Doctrine though.

Primsy opposes the Ramsian Doctrine & Brassica in general once she hears about it though, so one can assume that she and the people around her don’t prioritize or agree with that in their worship.

We know Caramelinda is Bulbian, and she married Archmage Lazuli, so presumably she does not have the same issues with her use of “pagan” magic as Saint Citrina may have.

Other than that we don’t have a lot on her religious beliefs, except that she wasn’t super stoked about Saccharina as Queen, but I think that was less because of her magic and more because of how violently anti-Bulbian and generally chaotic Saccharina is.

When Brassica’s whole Ramsian Doctrine plan gets set into motion, she gets a whole bunch of letters from churches across the continent that are like “um no??? please don’t cause the apocalypse??”, mostly from Candians (who we can assume are generally anti-Ramsian because they don’t want to die) but also from all the other countries.

So. There we go. Lmk if there’s any inconsistencies or anything ^v^

#dnd #d20 #dimension 20 #d20 spoilers #dimension 20 spoilers #trw spoilers #trw #the ravening war #the ravening war spoilers #acoc spoilers #acoc #original post #theology #cw: religion #cw: religious themes #i'm having a neurodivergent 'i need to talk about this or i will die' episode #so here yall go #I lowkey forgot this post was in my drafts #or it would’ve been out while TRW was actually going on lol.

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rainbowthedragoncat · 6 months

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A thought about the "What's crack-a-lackin', homie?" line:

So think about the context. This is the full piece of dialogue:

"A business card...? Ah, yes. I read about this custom among businessmen in this country. I have even familiarized myself with the various replies. "How do you do, good sir?" or, "What's crack-a-lackin', homie?" for example."

This implies Nahyuta didn't just learn "this is a common japanifornian greeting" (actually now I'm curious, what's this line like in japanese?), he somehow learned that it's an appropriate reply to someone giving you their business card.

#ace attorney #nahyuta sahdmadhi

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starheirxero · 1 month

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Shaking hands with 📦 anon cause I haven't watched tsams in Months and have no idea whats going on anymore, but it's fun to see you and some others I follow go insane on the regular lmao

HELEPAIQHODJD THATS SO FAIR THO. get info on the happenings via me and other's loud dramatic wailing as god intended /silly

#asks #crack-a-lackin-max #its what i do to all my other friends on discord on a daily basis anyways HEHQHQHDJ

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k1nky-r0b0t-g1rl · 2 months

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Hey there baby

What’s crack-a-lackin’?

kjfdngf

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streaminn · 9 months

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i got some more white slang you can write enid using

news flash buddy

bamboozle

calling someone chief

dagnabbit

and all that jazz

livin the dream

as if

that's just the way the cookie crumbles

i reckon

what's the plan stan (note: the person's name does not need to be, and typically is not, stan)

crack-a-lackin

hoodwinked

holy moly

holy smokes

holy cow

that's outta this world

holy cow that's outta this world

you're on thin ice pal/buddy

funky fresh

scrum diddly umptious

tell ya what

that's all i got for now lol

i.. why is there so much....

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bonestopaste · 8 months

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hi lotf fandom….. whats crack-a-lackin 😭 why are we sending death threats & making multi paragraph calllout posts lmao

like i understand not liking someone (theres people here i dont like) buts its so immature to be that rude. i can understand mental illness causing uncontrollable emotions but jfc man up and apologize in dms not on anon

#lotf #lord of the flies

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cornertheculprit · 1 year

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i have to add on to this post again. another example of phoenix and edgeworth being totally disconnected in how they see each other by the time trials & tribulations rolls around is that in phoenix's ending statement in bridge to the turnabout when he says "(Even when the battle is over, and the bonds that connect us are severed... We always return... Time and time again. Mia, Maya, Pearls, Mr. Armando... ...and Maya's mother, too... I learned that... from all of them.)" he's literally talking about people returning time and time again and you have edgeworth who literally returned from overseas at the drop of a hat the instant he thought phoenix's life might be in danger and phoenix just. doesn't mention him when it comes to the topic of returning at ALL. he mentions diego over edgeworth. he mentions MISTY over edgeworth. and it makes perfect sense characterization-wise because at this point in time edgeworth and phoenix are in the middle of something akin to a kind-of sort-of role reversal from how it was in aa1. this time it's edgeworth going "i believe in you wright....i leave the rest in your capable hands...partner" and phoenix going "uh. okay man. thanks." don't get me wrong phoenix IS very friendly to edgeworth throughout the entirety of bridge to the turnabout because how could he not be but also. it's very clear at this point that edgeworth is no longer the main fixation point of phoenix's obsessiveness after cycling through the "savior complex" and "extreme anger" options. like he's over it. he's moved on. he's dealing with other things now. he's got a life to live and maya and pearl to look after. he's perfectly fine with being totally chill friends with edgeworth now. and then you have edgeworth in the corner waxing literal poetic about phoenix and it's like Hm! Okay. What Crack-A-Lackin' Here

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b--b-3 · 11 months

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Sooo I've decided to finally cross-post my Obey Me crack-fic from ao3, I hope you enjoy!✨️

°•°•°•°•°

Cheek Clappin' Behavior

Ch.1

summary: Mc gets bamboozled by the game we all know and love 😭. They also happen to get yeeted right into it at full throttle, oops. How, you ask?? Who knows-

warnings: swearin/strong language, a quick innuendo, Mc just bein straight up wild tbh

misc: this fic doesn't accurately follow the story, literally just random shits 'n giggles for now lmao [pls it's so unserious ajfjshsjs] + the memes you see edited were done by me in my absolute mess of a gallery 💀

word count: almost 1k

It was just an ordinary day for Mc… Well, that is if you could call simping for fictional characters from a story-based gacha game ordinary. Okay, maybe they're a liiiiiiittle bonkers in the head, but we still love 'em 😋.

[Mc's POV]

'You've gotta be clappin' my cheeks unequivocally rn.'

"How tf am I gonna pull up AND get bumblefucked by this yee yee ass game 🤨🤨🤨??" Okay, so maaaaybe I got raw-dogged by a fictional world, but I can fix this for sure‼️

Oh.

I didn't fix this. Far from it, in fact. Yet another 10 pull, wasted… 😟

Welp, whatever‼️‼️ Back to the story then hehEHEHEHE— HOLY FUCKIN' MOTHER OF GO— MAMMON YOU ABSOLUTE BABYGWORL TF YOU DOIN' LOOKIN' LIKE THAT?? 🤭🤭🤭

Even tho he plays hard to get, he ain't a match for MY sluttish behavior 🤪—

THIS? FUCKING?? $ Ł Ü ✝️? ? ? "The absolute fuckin' audacity I swear— AND this mf blushin' too? Consider tears runnin' down my leg fr fr for real fr‼️" YOU SEE THAT TUB OVER THERE MAMS?? YEAH HOP IN THAT BITCH CUZ I'M BOUTTA 😩😩—

Ahem.

Caught myself lackin' for a sec there sorry bout that y'all 💀—

I then end up playing this damn game for a psychologically questionable amount of time. Such a long time, in fact, my raggedy ass fell asleep with the game open. O p e n. I didn't even get to charge my shit— hot damn 😬.

Next thing I know, I'm exposing my eye sockets to a ridiculous amount of light.

✨️OWIE✨️—

Oh.

'Now why in the ass-eatin' fuck does this place look familiar?? This ain't my house OR my room🗿. Tf is goin' on in here on this ass-chappin' day 🤨🤨??'

Like, the more I look around, the more shit's appearance becomes clear to me [no d U h Mc?? C'mon get it together 😭].

'Tho it does look a bit [a fuck ton tf you mean?? 💀] like my room in Obey Me…🤔'

"Did my bitch-ass get isekai'd into the world of Big Boobie Bitches— I mean Obey Me??????⁉️🗣📢🔥"

' …You've gotta be tuggin' my schlong rn this shit is a different breed. No, literally. Does that mean I'm a whole ass sheep now⁉️ This ain't gonna work. I swear on my left kneeca—'

All of a sudden, someone's headass bursts into the room. I was about to chew them tf out like a baddie, but then I SEE 🕕🫦🕕—

'CERTIFIED BABYGWORL??? AJDJSJEEJ OMGOMGOMG IT'S HIIIIIIIM IT'S MAAAAAMMMMS OH MY—🥺🎊✨️🫧💖‼️🥰💛'

"Yo, human! Ya were s'pposed to hang out with me today! What's goin' on?"

I—

'Ugh. What a cutie 🥰. Look at him, lookin' at me like that 'n shit 😭💖.'

I stare right back at the white-haired babygworl— I mean demon, trying a lil TOO hard to fight the inner voices that are telling me to jump him unprovoked.

"Well, tbh tbh honestly tbh, I haven't the slightest fuckin' clue Monie.. Buuuuuuut you can still take me out if you want tho 👀." I give him a lil look. Yano, a look. A little lookie look. A look that looks like a lil look because it looks—

"Whatever, let's just go. You've been makin' The Great Mammon wait long enough." He then drags me outta the room as if I'm his bitch.

'OW MY PUSS- now hold on for just a diddly ding dang darn second ☝️🤓— here I thought it was supposed to be the other way around 🤨🤔❓️ ❓️ ❓️'

Welp I'll just have to worry about it another time ig 🤷.

Anyways, now we were makin' our way [downtown] through the Big Ass House of Lamentation, BAHoL for short, trying to get to wherever tf Mammon has plans for. Well, that is until we run into a certain someone.

'GAAASSSPP IT'S HIIIIIM‼️ LEVIATHAN THE SWEET BOOOOOOYYYYY OHFUCKOHFUUUCK 🥰💖🫧🧡✨️‼️'

"Yooo, Levi! Funny seein' ya outside ya room for once." Both Mammon and I then proceed to start gigglin' like two lil bitches lmao.

Until this mf turns around 🗿.

…My face just about shriveled up inside itself.

'DID BABYGWORL #3 GET EVEN QUIRKIER 😳😳😳⁉️'

"Levi.. you good?? You're looking a bit differently different there bud 😭😭."

'I swear to shit there are literal SPARKLES just shootin' me in the eyes rn.'

"Idk what you're talking abt lol." He blinks and just shrugs at me like absolutely NOTHING is wrong like wtf my g—

"Tbh tbh honestly tbh Levi you're looking MAD ✨️bbg✨️ rn and idk how to cope with that so I think it's best you induce an anime withdrawal for just a singular sliver of a second the sake of my sanity 🗣🗣."

It takes him a couple seconds for the matter inside his cranium to process whatever tf just came out my mouth.

"B-Bbg!? WOOOAAAHHHH❗️🗣🗣🗣📢💥.. I-I can't believe you're calling a no-good otaku shut-in like me that!" He takes a moment to cover his now blushing face sextillion times more than his hair already does with his hand.

'Omg what a lil cutie I swear— got me swooning 'n shit <3.'

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, whatever! We've gotta get goin' now. See ya later, Levi!" Mammon cuts off the ENTIRE interaction quicker than it even started before dragging me away like a fucking rag doll.

'L?? M?? A?? O?? Tf is all this motion for 🫨🥴?'

What the plans are?? I still haven't the slightest of darn clues, buT I GUESS WE'LL FIND OUT 🗣.

I kid you tf not we literally only managed to reach the main entrance before getting jumpscared by none other than Lucifer himself—

'EYE- SWEET MOTHER OF DIAVOLO'S (. )( .)‼️—'

[✨️To Be Continued✨️]

#obey me #obey me shall we date #obey me memes #obey me crack #obey me shitpost #obey me fanfiction #obey me mc #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #i also did this on mobile so if it looks vile on pc i am SO sorry 😭#lemme know if i need to add any additional warnings and/or tags‼️

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