#what if i cant play anymore?

[nexttothelamp]

...

#no brain tumor #no cancer #not sure about lyme yet but i doubt it #its just an escalation of the sleep stuff #at the 1.5 year mark and its gotten to THIS #i cant do it anymore. but i have to. so i will. and thats really all there is to it #....i cant color anymore. #i used to be especially good with color blends #patterns and such #the thing i made last night... was like something i wouldve made in grade school #its been so long since i tried but i didnt think id lose the ability to... color. of all things #now im too afraid to pick up one of my instruments again. even if id only have the energy for one song... #what if i cant play anymore? #hell i already had to quit playing minecraft because id just. get lost running in circles around the map. not remembering what i was doing #same thing happened with tears of the kingdom after the hyperfixation wore off #back to not being able to tell dreams from reality and that is really fucking bad when all your dreams are nightmares #for a bit i was able to whittle charms to hang over the bed. but if im not safe to drive i definityl shouldnt be handling a knife #not even to sharpen the colored pencils i cant use... #at least in this hellsite i can talk to myself as much as you #next up is the neurology department. and some harassing of other sleep labs #wish me luck #id say delete later but i wont

[apathyfairy]

last year i found a wii at goodwill for 25 dollars and it came with everything except a wiimote but it was in such good condition i was like hell yeah ill take it how hard can it be to find a wiimote. the answer is it's nearly impossible to find them at thrift stores now so i've spent like 8 months looking for ones in thrift stores but there wasn't a single one and then online but i just couldn't bring myself to spend 30 dollars on one single wiimote so i waited so. patiently. and then 2 weeks ago i finally found one at goodwill for 9 dollars but it was absolutely disgusting and the battery cover was missing and the compartment was all corroded so i put it back and regretted it the whole week but then this last weekend i went to savers and there was an absolutely perfect wiimote just sitting there with no corrosion and a jacket and the wrist strap and motion plus and the nunchuck was there too and i got it all for 10 dollars so the moral of the story is that sometimes things seem right for you in the moment but you have to recognize that they aren't and leave them behind so the things that are meant for you will in fact find you when the time is right. peace and love <3

#for real though im so happy i cant even lie like i regretted selling my wii soooooo much but anyway im back baby <3 #im disinfecting everything rn bc i have a germ problem but once it it's done.....i am SO back #when i first got it i didnt have the remote right so i couldnt plug it in and make sure that it worked but i did just plug it into an outle #to make sure it ran and it did and wii sports resort popped out of the drive so thats fun bc i didnt have that one #and anyway i might cry when i hear the menu sound ngl ngl. #but the city i live in is like an overgrown retirement home and so the goodwill is full of old people things and this wii had stickers #like explaining which cord was which so i just know it was a wii that they bought for like grandmas house and only played it when they were #over there so anyway cant wait to see what's on there and if the news channel and weather channel are still on the homepage even though #i dont think they work anymore lol #also shoutout to the type a kid who kept their wiimote in such perfect condition that i wanted to cry when i saw it sitting on the shelf #ty <3

[risingsunresistance]

wha... hey for those of you who have told me you've never played minecraft, or you have bedrock but not java... minecraft is. on sale? this thing NEVER goes on sale-

#seems like you cant buy JUST java from what i can see on this page. it's a java/bedrock bundle for $15 #(the page shows $20 but that's including a bunch of shop junk you dont need. JUST the games is $15) #i guess buying JUST java isnt a thing anymore. i dont see that anywhere on the shop page lol #dungeons and legends are also on sale #mobile and switch releases too #i have no idea what the prices are in anything but USD sorry #hey pspsps if you've ever wanted to play skyblock now's your chance #chat

[sofiaruelle]

Sooooo the last few days i’ve been seeing stars and suddenly i’m juggling 6 sorcerer boyfriends. Whats a polar bear to do?

Also this is my MC, 🍨✨ Sorbetes ✨🍨.

Context why my MC is a sentient polar bear.

The MC doesn't have a set appearance and then there was this dialogue. And the emotes are polar bear themed 😂😂😂 is also literally its own spoiler

#arcana twilight #arcana twilight Arcturus #arcana twilight Spica #arcana twilight Vega #arcana twilight Sirius #arcana twilight Alpheratz #arcana twlight Pollux #wow cant believe i’m actually drawing/playing something other than SDV #are you proud of me? #i was supposed to be playing reverse 1999 but likkkkeeee #i heard alpheratz and spica’s voice and it was game over #i spedrun the game in a week???? and the plot isnt done yet so i dont know what to do with my life anymore #The main story is pretty good?? I mean i wish that the MC would play a more active role??? #i mean she started learning magic in a whole as new world #but i like i just want my MC to fight yknow aside from like rushing to someones aid #although she literally is meant to be a support character but like #if i cant fight with magic let me fight with my fists/sord #the game really shines with the side plots!!! I enjoyed the friendship building and the character relationships #hahahha catch me drawing some of them in the future #Sorbetes built like Alpheratz’s new favorite napping place #Spica is very disappointed somewhere #Also Sorbetes goes by they/them

[faeryaesther]

Happy 21st Birthday, Carlitos. You'll always be our daylight shooting star ☆

#Carlos Alcaraz #Tennis #f:gfx #Project: Daylight Shooting Star #birthday post #posted this on 12am here bcs i cant handle the heartbreak anymore; need something happy to celebrate svsjsv #this was fun to made except that i have no idea what to do and just playing around with ideas and finally i got this #after days of researching and looking at the new graphic trends this is what i got ahdksvjs #also: thank you for liking my birthday project for carlos! it was really really fun!

[puppyeared]

man

#maybe im being pessimistic abt this. im not saying u should wear a mask every waking moment of your life god knows i cant #but also. hell no i dont trust u if anything i distrust u ppl even more after how things played out for the past 3 years #like there are situations where it might be inevitable catching covid. most of my family members are nurses and in constant contact #but there are also a ton of ways to make that risk low as possible like masking and wearing a face shield and having sanitizer #for me its not enough to just say oh we're in a small group and we're all vaccinated #motherfucker your kid is sick from preschool EVERY TIME WE VISIT. of course ill be wearing a mask she gave me covid last year #also no the fuck it isnt seasonal the cases go up because lack of caution makes the virus spread and mutate especially around times when #ppl gather. add that with virus transmission in cold weather and its a matter of different factors increasing the risk of spread #im also tired of ppl not understanding that i wont be their responsibility if i do get sick. maybe they can help me recover #but at the end of the day the risk of death and long term health is all on me. i cant change that #the govt barely gives me accommodations what makes u think theyll do anything for every individual case of long covid or worse #im so tired. im so tired #i dont even know if its possible to want this to be over anymore i just wish we didnt have to deal with this in the first place #ALSO COUGH INTO YOUR SLEEVE SERIOUSLY HOW IS THIS SO HARD TO REMEMBER #oh its just a cold/dry throat its not like i have covid or anything. no!! its basic hygiene!!! how is this so hard to understand!!!!!!!!!! #and no this isnt abt whether people have the means to protect themselves this is me bitching abt my relatives not taking me seriously #vent #my art #myart #doodles #covid 19

[eerna]

This has nothing to do with that ask so I won't put it there but I've been thinking about it SO MUCH because I now get to play TotK without the pink glasses of OMG NEW GAME!!! I like TotK!! I like the play on Zelda's usefulness in this new Hyrule!!! I like the theme of rebuilding and community!!! But it can't hold the candle to how well BotW did at EXECUTING the themes, not through the story but the cohesiveness of the game. Every bit of BotW is so clearly dedicated to talking about nostalgia, loneliness, the soothing nature of the Wilderness Itself. It's in the music, it's in the colors, it's in every mountain range and raincloud and stone you have to throw to discover a secret. The story was definitely a bit lacking, but each character still had an established relationship with the leads that served to point out how lonely they are now compared to a century prior. I knew absolute jack about LoZ as a whole before playing the game, and it managed to make me feel almost as entranced and drenched in its history as I do now that I've played and watched and read so much more. Meanwhile TotK is very clearly set in that same world, but doesn't match it at all. I keep finding places that make me go "something should be here!" and then nothing is there, but the area is CLEARLY meant to feature something there, and if I go to BotW and check that same area I will find something there because THAT is the game that was meant to be hosted in this world. I sort of wish there was no Depths and they instead focused on reconnecting the OG map to the current theme they were going for, as well as the Sky Islands, which are woefully underutilized and could have served the same purpose the memory hunt did in BotW, contextualizing the Zonai era and giving us a stronger foothold in this world.

#botw liveblog #totk liveblog #loz liveblog #it makes me sad when people say ''man i cant play botw anymore totk improved literally everything'' #like yeah the gameplay is overall better. but that's the only thing it has over botw. it is so clearly less developed and less thought thro #what i am trying to say is. i am reading botw fics again instead of the trl of totk ones i've collected over the past week whoops

[oceanwithouthermoon]

hi you will understand my view

saiki has a lot of boxes full of shopkins and miniature things in general

one day in the middle of a hang out w the gang they're bored in his room and he pulls out one of this bad bitches

ignore the low quality 😭

FUCKKKK YESSS. I DO. I DO UNDERSTAND.

there needs to be like a masterlist of kusuos fixations/special interests LOL but mini things is definitely one of them.. i like to imagine him with a little dollhouse full of shopkins and other mini things so he can shrink down to their size and hangout inside.. sorry that's so silly but i love it LMAO imagine his parents walking into his room and hes in a little mini hammock in a barbie dreamhouse..

omg kusuo writes in a diary but nobody can read it because its mini and he writes in it when hes tiny..

sorry im gonna keep adding my own stupid things to this but. some of his other fixations include zelda, my little pony, mario kart, hot wheels, stuffed animals, the frozen movies (specific ik), vocaloid (pjsk)..

remember how he made his dads figurine move like a real robo-suit when he was in it ? that but with hot WHEELS and those little mario kart figures oh my GOD. sorry.

i still believe that all of the objects and collections he's accumulated because of his fixations are all in hidden places around his room because he's embarrassed of them since like. collecting cute plushies and shopkins isnt a thing the average teenage boy would do. like his closet and the space underneath his bed or even boxes underneath his desk are like portals to another fucking world bro.

#post power reveal kaido and kuboyasu get jealous of tiny saiki riding tiny sick as fuck motorcycles LMFAOOO #everyones jelly that he gets to ride the pink barbie dream cars sorry i dont make the rules #also he def fixated on fnaf as a kid (so did akechi and kaido) but not so much anymore #he played all the games and still knows most of the lore (and owns the books n shit lol) but i wouldnt call it a fixation anymore #i think half the tdlosk friend group collects hot wheels btw #toritsuka for definitely for sure for absolutely for sure #probably also kaido and yumehara #yumehara collects lalaloopsies idc what u say u cant prove me wrong #shes probably also a shopkins collector tbh #omg ??? stop ??? chiyo and kusuo bonding over their toy collections ?? omg. #or collections in general idk they also bond over project sekai so theres prob other things too #saiki k #tdlosk #the disastrous life of saiki k. #saiki kusuo #meows post

[swords-of-a-soilder]

I've sleep on it here's my beef

If you wanna log in to participate in a event that fine, I get for some CC's purgatory 2 isn't lore (I mean it clearly is, but some players are choosing not to involve it in their lore.) But when you've made the discussion not to take part in the lore you can't ask about it on screen.

I literally got confused when someone told me bad had a reason and to check there lastest reblog, thinking the book gave them the reason and apologising, this fully left me thinking that the residents where told to return home until I was discussing with someone else and realized I fully misread that (I need to wear my glasses more TBh)

But this play apart of the problem because what I except was a lore reason and I went looking for it, just to find out later there is no lore reason bad just calls himself vactionbadboy halo when he wants to log in.

Look I get playing purgatory for fun, I get wanting to log in to see your friends, Tubbo did it, and Pac did it; but the difference with them being they made up a reason to be there (the boat didn't leave) is a completely valid reason.

I can see them going home and then later being drag back to the boat by the incompetent egg Island workers, but jumping back and forth to the island in the middle of purgatory is problematic.

If you don't want to take part in the lore then don't, don't ask questions about what's happening lore wise (on stream he can always inquire in dms ) , don't do things on the Island that messes with other people's lore or breaks the immersion make it easy for the actual people who care about the lore; Ie: fan fiction writers, artists, role players (I am all these things) to pretend you're not there!

This sounds dumb but I genuinely, when lore is happening take note of every little the to go "how can I explain this in lore, how could I enhance this in lore" to help with my fan art or fan works.

Genuinely I have a list of game mechanics,(chat, tabs list, death messages) and have written ways to explain them in lore, so you can imagine my annoyance when someone who isn't supposed to be involved ask questions fresh of a lore event.

I think the confusion to add to it is that Phil has been trying to do more improv on the spot right now rp; like leaving cuucurhoo the notice of the eye guy and keeping his webcam on until a big event ( and I love him for that, genuinely I love lore so much because it feeds art and fan fiction)

But I feel like im being taken a fool when someone who isn't technically supposed to be there asks questions about something they're not supposed to be awear of and even bounces of it like they're in lore "yeah it looks like we're going to war with you guys." we who? You're supposed to be Vacation halo, you aren't in purgatory right, if so how did you get home?!

Get what I'm saying? It sucks because everyone else so far seemed to-do A decent job of staying out of lore if they want to visit some committing to not coming back to the island at all (cough* bolas *cough ) .

If you don't wanna take part in the lore don't complicate the already existing lore, it annoynes me greatly.

I don't mind the attenting events so much, it's the fail rping of discussing something you shouldn't know not long after it happened. (Metagaming)

#qsmp #qpurgatory 2 #bbh neg #this is why you dont fail rp #like ok i get it its not canon for you #but it is for others #and like you need to respect that #if some players dont have the option to call upon certain people because they been kidnap despite stating they wish they could #i need you to play along and pertend you're not here dont ask about the lore #ignore the image at spawn #is that so much to ask #-50k rp points #you can disagree innthe comments but please dont do it when they intention of getting me to respond and see it your way #i get that you want people to see things your way but let people have opinions #you can state “i disagree cause” but please don't start getting accusatory towards me i domt h #i don't have the time for this #let people have opinions thanks #also if any other creator did this i would be upset #it's not a bbh specific thing its the action that upsets me #i know for a fact to im not the only one who found stuff confusion evem others are saying they cant tell what's canon anymore #like please i need players to work around not wanting to lore #be a good sport please #qsmp discourse

[ambagel]

Wait hold on, in his anniversary video Barbatos mentions the mc being the brother's attendant?

But in the other videos, it's implied that they don't remember the mc leaving (which is actually something im very disappointed about and really hope isnt the case in the actual story)

In these two specifically, it seems like they aren't aware of the mc's presence in the past/alternate timeline/whatever it is. The only other person who seems like they know is Lucifer

Which also lines up with the end of lesson 40, where he's the only one who says welcome back? So like?? Do only him and Barbatos know? Did they not tell anyone?? Diavolo would probably know as well but I haven't seen anything to show that yet. Anyways I don't really like where this is going, I would really prefer they not make everyone forget the mc disappeared

#of course they could always just be not quite putting the pieces together in these scenes #buuuut at this point im not so sure.. #i was hoping theyd take a more “WE MISSED YOU” approach #because if im being honest those are some of my favorite moments #like yay everythings better now lets hug it out #i feel weird about them potentially not knowing about what happened #how would they play that off? solomon already said they were freaking out? #“oh whoops we time traveled just far back enough that no one noticed you were gone” #no #do not do that #that defeats the purpose of this whole shenanigan #they also cant just say it was the regular past #because story inconsistencies #solomon has even commented on how its different #hes like “simeon and luke shouldnt be here” #istg if they try to move past that without explaining i will explode #its a very plausible scenario at this point #theyve done it before #because oh does diavolo just not have the power to spot lies anymore?? ok #anyway im scared for the future of the story #this could go wrong in so many ways #obey me! #obey me! swd #obey me lucifer #obey me satan #obey me luke #obey me barbatos #posts #maybe barbatos just merges the timelines again and thats why everyone feels weird #idk im too tired to think more about this

[snixx]

life went forward and the world moved on but I never got over among us (2018)

#but no one:(( will play it:(( with me:(( #i miss amogus with my ex best friend and all her friends #she was just like me fr she loved introducing all her friends to each other its another reason i loved her so much #and why i struggled so much when my high school best friend started making friends outside of me who didnt like me #one of them even gave me this long ass lecture on KAVYA YOU DONT NEED TO BE FRIENDS WITH ALL YOUR FRIENDS' FRIENDS YOU KNOW #oh and you cAnt jUst Ask pEoPle tO bE yOuR fRiEnd (jokes on her we're friends now. kind of ive been ghosting her for a while but not the po #Int 💀) #and look i learned that. sort of. but i still struggle with it sometimes #like at least with my best friends i always wanted to know about and be involved with everyone in their lives you know #which ive realized now is not practical #but im still this hopeless romantic who wants to be friends with all my friends friends and all my friends to be friends #even if i barely have the energy for it anymore. i guess losing her drilled that in #also another thing i realized is. its good to keep your friends separate sometimes because if the chain breaks you dont lose a whole system #which wasnt even a point of consideration for me back then because like i said. hopeless romantic. why would we ever fall out #but yeah it was hard having to accept that sometimes the whole world doesnt want to be friends. and people are allowed to dislike each othe #shocking i know #anyway what am i even talking about how did i get here #girlblogging.pdf

[severedbananastranger]

Alan Wake is a game about a guy going to hell for screaming at his wife.

#alan wake #alan wake american nightmare #gaming #alan wake 2 #ok thats not really what happened #so basically this guy has like the worst writer block ever #and he cant like write anymore #and so basically his wife plan a vacatio to this town that has a fuckass psychiatric clinic #to treat his proble but he doesnt know #so when he sees that his wife brought a typewriter to their vacation #he flips out & scream at her #oh yeah i forgot the wife had a phobia of darkness so when he left the cursed cabin #it got dark & then she fell to the lake & drowned #shit happened & then he managed to save his wife but got stucl at this place which is just like hell ithink.... #you should just play the game #remedy

[mxwhore]

can i get a fucking Break

#ok so basically #grandma realized that she couldnt exert control over what i eat anymore (since i pay for basically ALL my food) #so now my WATER and GAS PRIVILEGES ARE BEING RESTRICTED #which is arguably worse!!! #i can show up hungry to work but stinky???? #for context my total shower time of the ENTIRE WEEK is like 25 minutes. i take one long 10 minute shower on sundays to wash my hair #and even THEN half of them are with cold water because were nearing summer and i like them #for MORE CONTEXT #1. my parents give her money for bills 2. the government give her money for bills #and more importantly 3. I EVEN OFFERED TO GIVE HER MONEY FROM MY OWN 'I NEED TO GTFO' SAVINGS!!! #she just sneered and said You dont have money. huh??? #she genuinely thinks i sleep around for food lmao #tldr; this is just another power play and i need to Get Out #i cant even save up for top surgery because all my money goes to food and my escape fund #please help lmao i will draw you pictures and everything

[mcybree]

Thoughts on 3rd life mirror birds. 3rd life big dogs. 3rd life property police. They fascinate me and I think you have thoughts on them but I might be wrong..either way

i do in fact have thoughts on them but i think if i talk about 3l!flower husbands publicly any more rn I’ll get so self conscious I’ll explode on the spot. this being said i have still yet to watch evo but its been on my list for forever bc of 3l!property police specifically… i really love martyns petty grudge against jimmy for those first two episodes he acts like he’s 12 and really pissed off on the playground. anyways i think that martyn going from being concerned for his friend to Just Fucking Lying to split up Scott and Jimmy, because he took personal offense to Jimmy being unwilling to drop everything to go live with him on the spot is the funniest thing in the world. Girl it’s not about you

#asks #for real though i think that martyn played up his offense at jimmy not taking the offer in order to pressure him into agreeing bc— #stuff like “oooh this is your ONE CHANCE for FUN OPPORTUNITY and if you miss it WE’RE NOT FRIENDS ANYMORE!!” typically works on jimmy #but martyn wasnt expecting jimmy to stand his ground on that #And at that point (in martyns mind at least) you Have to commit. so then the mock offense became Real. bc what can you do #he cant just go back on it and go like “sorry i was just worried and wanted you to live with me bc i miss you and— #dont think scott is treating you well” martyn would never be that honest with himself much less jimmy #The offer in itself was somewhat selfish to begin with in my mind as well #He did just want Jimmy to come live with him so he saw the opportunity and jumped at it. he’s an opportunist #but i also think he originally followed jimmy and brought it up with him out of concern. does that make sense #a little while after their falling out i think he fully puts jimmy out of his mind #“Jimmys a lost cause he’s clearly done with me. Why should i care when he clearly has a nice loving husband he cares sooo much about #(eyeroll emoji) lets save grian” <- what i think he was thinking #he didnt mean for jimmy to die #but what happens happens yknow. the games the game #sorry for putting all of my Real Thoughts in the tags i wasnt expecting to write them out honestly #i just think about their conversation on that mountain a lot….bigb moves into that specific spot later and martyn gives him shit about it #Which means something to me also (<- bigb and martyn pilled individual) #etc.etc

[hsslilly-blog]

i know nothing about coding but if i did i'd rip the damn game apart and pull out all the dialogue for quests and put them in a. idk spreadsheet or google doc or something. i HATE how this high school story and hollywood u are so badly perserved and documented, partially through the fault of its creators. i get that these are niche games that a grand total of five people even remember them but if i think about how an ENTIRE HALF OF THE STORY IS GONE BECAUSE THERE'S A REQUIRED SERVER CHECK it makes my blood boil.

i am too passionate about this

hi! this is not a bad idea at all, especially since hwu is… very lost. i’ll get to work on something like this as soon as possible! i’ll also make my hss screenshots available.

i’ll use this ask to rant. i simpatize with you… way too much. i try not to speak about this very often because it just makes me angry and because, well, it’s a super niche game and we had around four years to organize and archive it but… it is a niche game. by 2022, who even was active in the fandom besides like… me and five other people? not to mention it was very out of the blue, with such a small window between the announcement and the shut down it was impossible to archive everything. i spent full days trying to screenshot as much of high school story as i could. and now i regret i didn’t spend this time archiving hollywood u instead. but what is done is done.

i think… i mean, as much as it sucks, high school story is still fully playable if you have the .apk (or if you have it in your ios). what really, really bothers me is how hollywood u is essentially… lost media? the game itself, yes, but over 20-30 quests are missing from the files because they were released after pixelberry (apparently) decided to store some of the assets on the online server and not locally anymore. even if i were to drop the quests in a word .doc, it still wouldn’t be fully available. and that makes me angry. hwu was last updated in 2018 with a “fix”. why couldn’t they have used the opportunity to make these files available locally? it was pretty obvious at that point the games were sunsetting one day. might have given the chance for the fans to preserve it in some way since hwu would be locked behind a server check forever.

i don’t know. i’m not a dev. but i’m pretty sure they had the tools and the means, they just didn’t see it as worthy of their time. and i get it a little. they were very busy with choices at that time. these games were very dead. pb was past them. but come on. hss and hwu were part of pixelberry’s history and i like to believe these games deserved more than what they got. ~30 days between the announcement and the shut down? please. a little bit more of respect for the art they themselves created!! i think it all just boils down to me feeling… angry, sad and… heartbroken that one of theses games is completely unplayable in 2024 and forever. just like that. to expunge and deprive people from the art you once delighted in creating and sharing is sad!

sorry for hijacking the ask. i just wanted to get this out. i’ll work on making the quests dialogues available.

#high school story #hss game #hss prime #hwu game #pixelberry #hollywood u #longpost #we do have some screenshots and gameplays #but it’s not the same thing is it? #it sucks i can’t like. #HAVE these games. in my phone. i can’t open them. i can’t play them #this feels… wrong!!!!!! #esp w/ hollywood u #what do you MEAN i cant even read a quarter of the quests?! #what do you MEAN there’s no way of OPENING the game anymore? #its so stupid sorry #i don’t talk much about this because i get heated #and i don’t want to be a debby downer i mean the fandom is pretty small i’m not going to fill it with rant posts #but. yeah #ask

[leofrith]

ooooooh my god i need some fucking joy i need some fucking joy NOW

#literally nothing is bringing me enjoyment right now NOTHINGGGG #(yes i know its the depression. whatever.) #i havent played bg in like three weeks. not even enjoying that anymore either #and i CANT FUCKING WRITE!!!!! #I'm so exhausted all the time I'm so bored I'm so lonely #and yeah I'm reading more lately which is great but I'm hardly enjoying myself I just #im so fucking bored im sick of killing myself to complete job applications just to hear nothing back im so. so tired #whatever!!!!! life sucks and then you die #pretty sure my birth control is gonna kill me anyway so whooo caresssss #idk what this post is about #tbd