#we will email results of covid later when it finishes

[silverlab101]

Pink Eye

There may be a hoop or scattered white, gelatinous inflammatory deposits within the limbal area . The cornea may have erosions, ulcers, and abnormal blood vessel growth. Dr. Straughn focuses on women’s cancers, and he says the most pink eye treatment rewarding part of his job is caring for patients, who comefrom all walks of life. Click for COVID-19 info on vaccinations, testing, visitors, on-line visits, and the way we offer protected care.

Older children and adults can also get conjunctivitis, but less frequently. Children's Hospital Colorado partners with NRC Health to gather star rankings and critiques from sufferers, residents and household survey data. This supplier both practices in a division or specialty that we presently do not survey, or does not have no much less than 10 ratings in the final 12 months. If only one aspect has pinkeye, an object within the eye must be thought of. From emergency to urgent care to 24/7 pediatric advice, we’re right here to help in the heat of second. All children should have an opportunity for a wholesome future.

This type normally starts about 2 to 4 days after birth. Treatment for gonococcal conjunctivitis usually will include antibiotics via an intravenous catheter. Neonatal conjunctivitis is the kind of pink eye that impacts newborn youngsters. Newborns usually have a weaker immune system, giving them a higher risk for pink eye. This kind of pink eye occurs when the child passes via the delivery canal. If the mother possesses certain forms of bacteria, it could possibly cause inflammation and this kind of pink eye to occur.

If visible loss, vital ache, sensitivity to light, indicators of herpes, or if signs do not enhance after every week, further analysis and treatment could also be required. Conjunctivitis in a new child, generally recognized pink eye treatment as neonatal conjunctivitis, can also require particular treatment. The various sorts of conjunctivitis usually may be distinguished by an eye fixed examination, including your medical historical past.

Bacterial and viral pink eye are each very contagious. They’re transmitted by coughing, sneezing and hand-eye contact with eye secretions. Your physician will prescribe a treatment plan based mostly on the purpose for your case of pink eye. And keeping our little ones healthy is certainly one of the most demanding elements of that job description. No matter what quantity of instances we inform our kids to clean their palms and maintain their fingers away from their eyes or out of their mouths, there’s no assure they’ll listen. RxList doesn't present medical advice, diagnosis or treatment.

The questions were about his signs and the way lengthy they'd been occurring, and some about his medical history. Honestly, getting my 3-year-old to sit down still for the photo was most likely the largest problem. I finished, and within pink eye treatment 10 minutes a nurse practitioner had emailed me back. She confirmed that it was bacterial conjunctivitis and sent a prescription to my pharmacy. I was selecting up my son’s medication quarter-hour later. Cold compresses are among the many handiest at-home remedies for pink eye symptom reduction.

Subsequently, the fistula can cause rupture and hemorrhage, resulting in irreversible harm to the eye and/or death. Due to venostasis, the ophthalmic vein dilates and causes congestion of the episcleral vessels mimicking conjunctivitis. Proptosis and a pulsatile globe can help differentiate between a fistula and conjunctivitis. Orbital cellulitis is an infection posterior to the septum and includes the orbital contents.

Gonorrheal or chlamydial infections require both oral and topical antibiotics. About three to six million people get conjunctivitis every year within the United States. In adults, viral causes are extra common, whereas in kids, bacterial causes are extra widespread.

[furturret17]

<h1>Nigeria Worldwide Journey Portal</h1>

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He helped set up a forum entitled "Religious Forum for Peace", an end result of the want to devise a sustainable decision mechanism to revive peaceable Muslim-Christian community interaction within the region. External hyperlinks to different Internet websites and listings of private entities on this page are offered as a comfort and should not be construed as the U.S. Department of State or U.S. government endorsement of the entity, its views, the services or products it provides, or the accuracy of information contained therein.

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After the attack the prime minister addressed the nation on national TV unhurt by the blast and describing it as an "unsuccessful attempt by forces who don't wish to see Ethiopia united".

Abiy had previously met former Oromo Liberation Front leaders together with founder Lencho Letta, who had dedicated to peaceful participation within the political process, upon their arrival at Bole International Airport.

Citing "domestic issues," he refused to take questions publicly after the award.

Within this Guerrilla battle, civilians will inevitably be caught within the crossfire as combating will probably be most distinguished in civilian areas. Both sides should also grant unobstructed entry to humanitarian organizations that may provide help and provides for those in want and restore communication channels to ensure transparency by each groups. The United Nations has warned that millions of kids are still minimize off from assist in Ethiopia's conflict-riven Tigray area, regardless of promises made by the federal government earlier this month to permit humanitarian businesses entry. Some 2.3 million minors are struggling to get basic humanitarian help like therapy for malnourishment, critical vaccines, emergency medicines, and water and sanitation provides, UNICEF, the UN agency liable for youngsters, mentioned Tuesday. We have already provided some supplies to a number of partners in Tigray however this is not enough.

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Crime, kidnapping, armed conflict, and the potential for ethnic battle exist near the Ethiopian borders with Sudan and South Sudan. This contains however is not restricted to the Nuer Zone and the Jore Woreda of the Agnuak Zone in the in Gambella area, and the Pawe, Guba, Dangur, Dibati, and Bulen Woredas, and the Metekel Zone within the Benishangul Gumuz region. U.S. government personnel are not permitted to journey to the border areas of Sudan and South Sudan, with restricted exceptions to help humanitarian capability efforts.

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[moeblob]

Okay, text post time.

I know on multiple occasions people have told me to consider taking breaks with my art cause I draw every day and they’re looking out for me. Well, my stubborn self has drawn daily since Jan 1, 2017. And I’m going to do my best to keep it up! But! I had to miss work today due to feeling ill and had to go get tested (for flu, strep, and Covid) and I am ashamed to admit I did test positive for Covid. I’ve slept almost all day today and still feel a bit dizzy from a headache so if in the next few days there is an absence of art, that’s why. 

I really want to keep the dailies going but I am not about to force it if I really can’t do it. Thanks for understanding! 

#moe talks a lot #not art #wow how EMBARRASSING to get called into see the doctor with someone telling me #yeah we haven't had any positive cases here yet C: and then oh no worries on flu and strep those are negative #we will email results of covid later when it finishes #WHAT UP YOU TESTED POSITIVE #that is so weird like wow man cool im the first in the vicinity to get it where did i get it from #anyway thats a moe update i never wanted to give #and i know people tell me its okay to take breaks but with my major depression - art is sometimes the only thing getting me outta bed #its benefited me so much in the long run drawing every day and giving me one thing to feel proud of #i might not like where i am skill level wise but i am proud that i kept it up for so long #so i hope i can keep the streak going but as many of you pointed out - health first

[freifraufischer]

An interesting sports/politics observation:  

I’ve been following the dumpster fire at USAG for quite some time now and became deeply interested in following the sport of gymnastics in more than a 4 year fan way around the time that the Larry Nassar scandal broke.  

The post mortem on the US women’s gymnastics team results in Tokyo was honestly starting around Olympic trials in June.  The US women have never traveled much internationally for decades so they compete less than other international gymnasts.  The argument has been that the travel takes away from valuable training time.  What was little became none because of COVID and the bankruptcy filing of USAG to deal with the lawsuits arising from the abuse scandal.  

It was known that the US women were also being domestically over scored by judges at home.  Domestic overscoring is not unique to the US but most countries that have it also complete internationally so their athletes have a real sense of how international judges will evaluate their routines.  There have been alarm bells for at least three years that the US women were not going to get credit for elements and face deductions in international competition that they weren’t facing at home.  Just this year one of them was literally used in a pictorial example of a international judging document for something that should be deducted--the fact that current athletes are used this way is a whole other horrible kettle of fish.  I should add that the discovery that routines that were being scored highly in the US would fail at the olympics isn’t even new.  Famously the reigning world champion missed out on the all around final at the 2012 games because she wasn’t given credit for connections and series that were overlooked at home.

Now the job of bringing domestic meet scoring into line is on the national team staff and the job of advising and strategizing is that of the “High Performance Director” for the women’s program.  This is the job that was held (under the title National Team Coordinator) by Martha Karolyi with an iron fist before 2016.  She was replaced (after fits and starts) by a man named Tom Forrester.  Forrester’s defining qualities for the job have been that he is nice.  Literally the bar was that low.  He has demonstrated a rather alarming lack of knowledge about what international judges deduct for (after Junior World Championships he expressed surprise that they deducted for dance elements--something that happened again in Tokyo to US gymnasts), did not understand the Olympic selection criteria for individuals, and appeared to have a very very faulty understanding of the rights of athletes with an ongoing abuse complaint (more on that later).

He was relatively removed from the culture of high level elite coaching for the last few decades and the athletes considered him nice.  The last time he had been deeply involved in senior US gymnastics politics was the mid 1990s when several of his gymnasts were passed over for the 1996 Olympic Team because injured athletes were petitioned on to the team over those that competed at trials.  Mind you this was a time when the Olympic team had 7 members and the people petitioned on were the 1992 Olympic Silver Medalist Shannon Miller and 1995 National Champion Dominique Moceanu.  It would have been literally insane not to have them on the Olympic team.  But it has become apparent that Tom Forrester felt a great injustice was done to his athletes and the the worst part of US gymnastics team management was that Martha Karolyi picked favorites.  

This year he denied the petition of a former world champion to Olympic trials (she likely wouldn’t have made the team but her exclusion is... questionable) and after the fact justified it by saying she had failed to meet a criteria for the petition that he never told her existed.  At trials the team was chosen (by a committee that he had essentially full control over) took the top all around finishers in order of how they did at trials (as he would have liked them to have done in 1996).  This was in willful defiance that the format of the olympics now demands not all arounders but strategic use of team building for the best score possible.  The US did not bring the highest potential scoring team to the olympics because of one man’s wounded pride from 25 years ago.

And before you might be tempted to tell yourself he did this because he wanted to support the athletes let me tell you about the fact that he allowed a coach that was under investigation for abuse to come to a camp where one of the athletes that had filed the complaint against her was also in attendance.  His wife, who has a history of unhinged social media rants, claimed he didn’t have the authority to send home an athletes chosen coach.  In reality Louie Hernandez had the legal right not to have to be there with her.  That coach would later be banned for longer than anyone else has ever been banned in USAG history.

So in June anyone following the details of this knew that Tom’s strategy was entirely “we have Simone and so we will win.”  Because that kind of pressure and stress couldn’t possibly have any terrible consequences on an athlete.  Spoiler:  It did.  

People within the sport were warning about this before Simone Biles lost herself in the air during that vault in Tokyo.  The fact that we were all lucky not to watch one of the greatest athletes of a generation break her neck can not be overstated.  It was so scary that one of the most famously bitter angry and terrible human beings of Gymnastics that has been saying awful things about Biles for years kept telling Russian media that she made the right decision to pull out.  That was pigs flying territory.

Forrester left the athletes to face the press alone after the final.

So with that backdrop I want to give this observation:  Dominque Moceanu, an olympic gold medalist who has an abuse story so horrific with villains so cartonishly evil that if it was written as fiction the author would be told it was over the top, wrote a book about the culture of abuse in in the sport and USAG in 2008.  She was called insane, living on another planet, and apparently sent hundreds of emails by those within the sport that she was ungrateful for what her abusers had done for her (emails that she has apparently kept and I’m telling you I’d love to read more then the few I’ve seen).  Moceanu was a figure out of greek legend, Cassandra doomed to tell the truth and be called mad (and attention seeking).  In light of the fall of the Karolyis and the Nassar scandal Moceanu has become a more respected figure as someone that has been speaking out about abuse for a long time.  She has also been someone that other victims went to over the decades to talk to before they could come forward.  A weight that no one should have to bear.  

I had been joking that the only way people would start to trust USAG was honestly trying to reform was if they put someone like Moceanu in charge (Aly Raisman’s name is floated but even she points out that she’s not qualified).  Moceanu is.  But the old guard of the sport have spent two decades telling people that Moceanu is crazy.  I didn’t think she’d take the job and I didn’t think USAG would ever hire her.

But here is the interesting thing .... her social media presence radically changed character in the last three months.  Starting around the time of US Nationals and continuing though trials and the olympics between posts supporting team USA athletes and raising a voice to support Simone Biles and the need for a cultural change in the sport were digs at Tom Forrester and about the need for transparency in that job.  

And this:  “Would someone be kind enough to notify me if the U.S. women’s high performance coordinator position opens up? Asking for a friend.”  (x)  At the same time (literally the same day as one of those tweets) she launched a youtube channel that is essentially a political fluff piece about her as a change agent in gymnastics coaching.

She’s auditioning for that job.

There are a bunch of other interesting elements of her online behavior and some other telling notes about things she’s said ... but it’s interesting to notice something like that unfold.

[nanowrimo]

A Step-by-Step Guide to Self-Publishing a Middle Grade Adventure Book

It can be so exciting to share your story with the world! While everyone’s writing journey is different and there’s no right way to seek publication, here’s a guide from middle grade author RJ Vantalos detailing the steps they took to get their novel published:

Back in November 2018, my writing partner (my fiance’s 11-year-old daughter!) and I wanted to craft a middle-grade fiction book during NaNoWriMo. We decided to write about a family that has magical powers that they use to save a romp of Sea Otters in Monterey Bay. 

That NaNoWriMo journey created the first draft of the book we just self-published called The Magical Mystical Mirror under our pen name RJ Vantalos. Why a pen name?

As artists, we want to focus on our art and write some great stories together. RJ Vantalos gives us the space to collaborate as co-authors in this adventure series under a single banner, without blurring the lines with other aspects of our respective lives. Besides, RJ Vantalos is just an awesome pen name and was begging to be put to use.

We wanted to share how we did it so that if you might have a book you want to self-publish, you’ll at least have one experience to guide you.

Know Your Genre and What Readers Expect

At the time, we wanted to write a middle-grade story that had some roots in our lives. Since we take trips to Monterey Bay often (at least before COVID), we decided to make that the setting of our story.

Since one of us is a middle-schooler who loves both Scooby-Doo and Nancy Drew, it was decided that she would guide what a middle-grade reader might want to read about. This was invaluable and allowed us to fill in a lot of the story as we took our trips to Monterey Bay Aquarium, Mission Carmel, and Cannery Row.

We also knew that we wanted to have some magic, mystery, and a “crime” to solve. That led us down the path of Fantasy/Adventure that’s a cross between Scooby-Doo and Harry Potter.

What this also did was make us realize that we needed to have illustrations for the book. The middle-grade chapter books we are fond of, such as Boxcar Children, Nancy Drew, to name a few, all had illustrations. 

So the first step in our process (after we finished our Draft 0 during NaNoWriMo in 2019) was to find an illustrator. You can skip that if you don’t need them. 

Step 1: Find an Illustrator

We needed to have illustrations for the cover and beginning of each chapter. That was an essential part of what a middle-grade chapter book must provide for the reader. We worked with a local San Francisco artist named Julia Geller who writes books as well.

We had to make sure that our draft was not going to change too much since the illustrations will be based on what’s in each chapter. That’s why we needed to make sure it all made sense. This brings us to step 2.

Step 2: Have Friends and Family Read It

Thankfully, we have a wide variety of friends and family in our target reader group, so they served as our “beta readers.” This is an essential part of creating a story that works for your readers. As we had them read the close to final drafts, we got a lot of great advice on how to refine the story. This refining process is a good way to know when you’re ready to hire an editor.

Step 3: Hire an Editor

Hiring an editor is a great way to ensure that your final book makes sense and does not have typos. Since we already had the structure of the book nailed down, we only needed to hire a line editor as opposed to a structural editor.

For what, we used Kerrie McLoughlin, who not only is a great copy editor but also has kids in our age demographic. Win and double win! 

Step 3b: Rounds of Editing

Editing a book is such an art and it’s also something that feels like it’s never done. After we got the edits from Kerrie, we went through them to make sure they worked from our perspective. Even after that, we got others to look at it just to make sure.

If you don’t have someone awesome like Kerrie, there is a marketplace for editors on Reedsy.

Step 4: Create a Cover

Julia also did the cover illustrations for the book but not the cover. For that, we used 100covers. At first, you might be tempted to try and do a cover or use an automatic cover generator from one of the self-publishing tools (more on that later). We’d recommend against that. 

One thing we found is that automatically generated covers tend to be a little off and that makes the paperback look a little weird. For eBooks, that’s not as true. We’d say experiment with it and see how it looks. The beauty of self-publishing is that you control the process and can iterate over and over again. Which we did.

One upside with having 100covers do your cover is that we got a lot of marketing images to use as well since we picked that package.

Step 5: Format the Inside of the Book

Since we have images in our book, we hired Formatted Books to do both the paperback and the eBook. This worked out extremely well. At first, we tried to use the Reedsy formatting tool to create the print version. This did an okay job.

The problem was with the images and how we wanted them to look. We wanted the images to be above the first page of the chapter. The Reedsy tool did this but not on all of the chapters.

If you have a book that is not image-heavy (or no images at all), then you could save a bit of money on formatting. Again, play around with it and see how it turns out.

Step 6: Setup the Book on Blurb

We used Blurb.com as our “publisher” for the print version. It’s an easy site to use and also allows independent bookstores to order books as well. This was an important part of our promotion plan. We LOVE independent book stores and want all our friends and family to be able to buy them there.

Of course, with Blurb, they can also buy it on Amazon and Barnes and Noble if they so choose.

NaNoWriMo Young Writers Program participants also get a special Blurb discount by using the code YWP30

Step 6b: Setup the eBook on Kobo

Blurb.com does offer eBook distribution but you have to create an eBook from your print book pdf. This did not work out for us.

The formatting of The Magical Mystical Mirror turned out awful when we ran it through Blurb’s converter. It also gave us an error that we could not use the font that was in the print version. That was the main reason the formatting went wrong. When the tool tried to swap the fonts, everything went sideways. That’s why we went with Kobo.

Kobo.com allowed us to upload the eBook we got as part of the package from Formatted Books. This worked out awesome.

Kobo is easy to use and is a great way to sell the eBook (and audio if we had one) all over the world. We first heard of Kobo from Joanna Penn, whose podcast and books on self-publishing we relied on for help and guidance. She’s even done NaNoWriMo several times!

Step 7: Review Print & eBook

We did several rounds of galley copies of the print book to double and triple-check it. A galley copy is what publishers call the first book(s) “off the press” that is used for final checks.

We did find a couple of typos and mistakes in the galley copies that we had to feedback to Formatted Books. It’s hard to find every typo or misspelled word when looking at an electronic copy. We’d highly recommend getting a couple of galley copies to look at before officially hitting publish.

Step 8: Hit Publish!

On both Blurb and Kobo, you can keep your book in “draft” while you’re reviewing all the versions. You’ll also have to set pricing for all of your versions and if you’re selling to bookstores, the discounted price. Both tools have good guidance on this and we would recommend looks at “comps” in your genre. “Comps” are books that are similar to yours.

Congratulations! You just self-published your book. Have a party to celebrate while you think about how to promote your book.

The Promotion Plan

We love independent books stores and a big concern of ours was whether or not they could carry our book. Thankfully, if you use Blurb, they can.

Our promotion plan is centered around local independent bookstores and creating demand for the book via friends and family. Of course, writing a blog post on NaNoWriMo does not hurt either!

Research All Your Local Bookstores

We used bookweb.org to find our local books stores. This only works for U.S. based bookstores. They have a great search feature that gives you a URL for the search results. This URL is what we’re going to email to all our friends and family along with instructions on what to tell them.

We know this is a bit “old school” but it’s important to us that we try and promote our local independent bookstores to help our local economy. We’re not sure how successful it will be yet but it’s worth a try.

Thanks for Reading This Far

If you made it this far, thanks for reading our journey to self-publishing The Magical Mystical Mirror. It was a lot of work but also a lot of fun. There is something magical about seeing and feeling a book you worked on. For us, it’s a matter of pride and a job well done that we had an idea and it’s now a reality.

If you’d like to read The Magical Mystical Mirror, why not try and pick it up at your local independent bookstore. The ISBN number is 978-1034384199. Tell them RJ sent you! If you’d like the eBook version, then try Kobo.

RJ Vantalos is the pen name of the collaboration between an entrepreneur and his fiance's middle-schooler daughter who one day said "why don't you write books for kids?" So we did! RJ wants all young writers, their friends, and their adults to create more together. It's through creation that we can all learn more about each other and thrive. RJ lives in San Francisco, CA.

#nanowrimo #writing #amwriting #ywp #young writers program #now what #publishing #self-publishing #by nano guest #rj vantalos

[shiroolynn]

just a few thoughts /2021.05.15/

I will go at my own pace from now on. The past weeks.. wait no, the past one year actually was the most difficult time of my life for sure. Starting from my second knee surgery, doing the first part of the rehab after, all alone at home because of the shutdown, then spending the summer mostly alone in Slovenia, doing the rest of the rehab work there until autumn. Everyday was the same. I felt very lonely. I was lonely. My motivation was kind of gone too. But I was doing it anyway, because what else could I do? I was on autopilot.

From last autumn when I started to jump again, I felt like I was in a hurry 24/7. In my back of my mind there was a countdown, independent of all personal feelings and physical capabilities at the time : “I have X time left to this certain thing, that time for Y..“ I was in a panic state. “I need to”, “ I have to”, “I must be at this competition” and so on. I completely ignored what my body told me, well okay, I knew that I was on my limit, but I wanted to push it anyway, show everybody and myself that I can do it, I can endure all the pain. I was way too hard on myself, physically and mentally as well. The result? I burned out. I didn’t feel like I am able to finish the season, I saw no point in flying to Russia, I was suffering very badly on the hill. Packed all my stuff, jumping kit and went home. After a few weeks my whole family got COVID-19. No taste or smell, tiredness, heavy breathing. No trainings are allowed until medical check. I was devastated. In my head I was like: ” I am late I am late I supposed to work out, but instead I am laying in bed“. Countdown again. Panicking again. When my quarantine was over I started with light trainings again. Possibly I was pushing again too hard later on because by the time I had to go to medical check, the result of the lung x-ray showed that I had -luckily only mild- pneumonia. I knew something was not completely alright with me, because I’ve had already heavy breathing the days before. Not allowed to do training again. In the meantime my coach called me that he resigned from his position. I was overwhelmed. I had a feeling that my thoughts were shouting in my head all the time. I was stress eating, my hair was falling out like crazy, I couldn’t sleep, my hands were shaky. I felt like the whole world turned against me. I wanted to quit. I wanted to quit so bad. Hungarian Ski Federation was really supportive and ensured me about that they will find a solution. But I was still in shock, told them I don't know what to do and might quit my career. Few days later, after a lot of thinking and sleepless nights, I wrote an email to the Hungarian Ski Federation that I decided to quit my ski jumping career. I told this to the closest people in my life, family members and a few others, but did not share publicly.

The day after my Dad gave me such a speech I started bawling my eyes out. Among all the things he said to me, something like: “you do not have to qualify, you do not have to be in Wisla when the summer Grand Prix starts, everybody knows what you went through”. I was sobbing, crying like a baby. I needed to hear this. This one line felt to me like I was being struck by lighting. Something has broken inside of me. My Mom was calling me asking why am I crying this hard, and I was like: because of everything!! I think I have let go all of my stress, pain, sadness of the past year and the ‘being in a hurry feeling’ was gone too after crying. I wrote to Astrid, that I regretted my email what I sent to the Federation. I called János, (the coach of the kids here in Kőszeg) told him I changed my mind too, and together we figured out my basic plan for the next weeks. In the meantime I recovered from pneumonia.

In conclusion: I was being way too hard on myself, I was forcing everything, and just forgot to enjoy ski jumping and have fun like… at all. I was too busy worrying about my future, about the others, I completely lost my present self. I was not living in the present at all. But now I feel calm. The pressure what I (and a nameless person, definitely not my ex coach khm ) created for myself vanished. The shouting thoughts in my mind has gone silent:) I am sooo thankful for all the people who are with me during this challenging time of my life!! I love all of you. Thank you <3

Virág

#long post #sorry jhslf #i wanted to throw this out here cuz why not

[trivialbob]

I was six months late for my annual physical because of the pandemic. Earlier this month I got around to making an appointment. It had to be in person, not video, because I needed some tests. Today I had my appointment. Spoiler alert - tests were fine.

In June I felt a little odd. I had a COVID test. It was negative. This spring and summer, my exercise was down and my drinking was up. I’ve had some awful heartburn and some other pains. The doctor sees a link. I was honest about how much I had been drinking since March. He raised his eyebrows a little, but also said he has seen that in some others as well this year.

We weren’t talking AA, just dialing it back. By a good amount. And hey, if you stop all together for a while that might be OK too. With the heartburn I’ve been having I actually had started cutting back a month ago. I’m under very little stress. The drinking was for fun, not coping. I was just having too much fun while bored at home with the pandemic.

He ordered routine blood work and an EKG. I also had to get an X-ray of my hip because of some problems I’ve had there.

The lab tech who drew my blood groaned when I flinched at the antiseptic he wiped on my arm. “That wasn’t the needle.” I know, I know, I just can’t sit still for this. With my eyes squeezed tightly shut I grabbed the arm of the chair for dear life. A minute later he said, “Hold this, please” and nodded at a cotton swab on my arm. He had finished! I hadn’t even felt it. I told him that was the easiest blood draw I’ve ever had. He laughed a little. I’d say he smiled too, but you know, we can’t see each other’s faces.

The same guy did the EKG. He stuck about a dozen little sensors on my torso and ankles. This I knew would not hurt so I didn’t flinch. When the test was over he ripped off those dozen sensors. That hurt! This man was clearly in the “rip off the Band Aid fast” school of thought. But I wasn’t going to say a word.

Then it was off to another room for x-rays. One interesting (to me) thing I noticed was the platform vibrated briefly when the x-ray was taken. I had to ask about that. The technician thought it was funny that I inquired. What? Doesn’t everyone wonder about that? Apparently not. She said it seems counter-intuitive but that brief movement of the platform actually helps improve clarity or resolution or something.

Technology. Wow! But wait, there’s more wow.

After I got zapped (that’s what the pros say right?) the x-ray tech explained something else to me. Another tech said, “Bob, Dr. A. is on the phone for you.” I took the phone from her hand. My doctor had already received the EKG results and was calling to say they were OK. No need to go back to his exam room to hear that. I love how efficient my doctor is.

While walking out to my car I received an email from the clinic. Some of the blood test results were already in and I could view them online.  Wow.

[cancerbiophd]

How I landed an industry job straight out of my life sciences PhD, without doing a post-doc 

In less than 7 weeks I’ll be defending my dissertation as a final step in my PhD in Cancer Biology, and yesterday I accepted a Scientist position at a local biotechnology company. And best part: I didn’t have to do the dreaded post-doc first! Which is pretty rare for our field (but I hope it’ll be more and more common for PhD’s going into industry).

I promised I would talk about the process here, and I hope that anyone who’s aiming for the same path can walk away with some tips or at least with a familiarity of the process. 

The main points I want to get across: 

Network network network. You can probably just stop reading here, because this job came about all through networking. I was basically head-hunted--someone in my network (a program alumnus) contacted me on LinkedIn to ask if I wanted to apply for a position on the team she directs. So set up your LinkedIn account, keep it up to date, and use it to actively network. At the very least you should connect with the alumni in your program as you all have something in common already, and since they’re out and about in the field they would be great resources for informational interviews and job referrals. 

My expertise and career goals matched the position. No brainer, of course. Even if I wasn’t contacted by the company, I would only be applying to companies I qualified for (so companies dealing with cancer since I’m my PhD is in Cancer Bio). My lab mate, for example, was finishing up his PhD in Nutritional Sciences but was applying to cancer companies with no result, because it just wasn’t the candidate those companies were looking for. My expertise was also probably what got that director’s attention in the first place and the reason she reached out. She was basically willing to wait 7 months for me (from job posting to my final start-date) because I was her ideal candidate, and not just based off my expertise alone, but our personalities matched too. She told me “we communicate well” aka our work personalities match. I know you can’t change who you are obviously, but getting along with your manager goes a long way. 

That being said, employers/PIs are flexible with start dates for PhD candidates. I applied to this position 6 months before I had my defense date set and when I only knew a ballpark of “sometime in the summer”. And then during my interview process I had to keep pushing that potential start-date back and back and back. But the company understood this. So as a PhD candidate you could start applying 6 months before your expected end-date (even if it’s still a moving target), or even months earlier for post-docs (which are much more flexible than industry positions). In general, you should start looking 1 year before your finish date to see what’s out there. 

It was also good luck/timing. If I had graduated earlier than the job posting, then I never would’ve had this opportunity. I also only added her to my LinkedIn network because I went to a lunch seminar where she gave a talk about working in industry. So small things that ultimately made a huge difference. Some you can’t control, but some (like going to that lunch) are definitely  opportunities to seize. 

I was low “flight risk”. Companies are always afraid their employees will leave the company/city for greener pastures, and that’s more common in “less popular” places to live, like the southwest desert where I’m located. But I’m from here, my grad school is here, my family’s here--so the company is making the assumption I’m not going to just up and go any time soon. You obviously can’t control where your family chooses to settle down, but you may be able to strategically choose your grad school based off of its proximity to potential companies. 

And lastly, in my experience, PhD’s with no post-doc in biotech industry should expect an annual salary somewhere between $75-95k (depending on the company and cost of living), with benefits.

Ok, my full story under cut if you’d like to know more about the process I went through:

It all started when a program alumnus (or alumna, if you’re picky about your latin) named RF talked at a lunch seminar to students in my program in Feb 2019. I was really interested in her company and knew she would be a great network to have, so I emailed her later to thank her, and then added her on LinkedIn. 

Fast forward to January of this year (2020) when RF messaged me on LinkedIn out of the blue asking me how close I was to graduating and if I would be interested in a position at her company. I think she wanted someone asap (so not me, I thought), but we talked more about my project, and she said she’d keep in touch. In February, she messaged me again saying a position opened up on her team and she wanted to see if I would like to apply. I said heck yes (or the more formal version), and sent in my application, with the expectation that I would be defending sometime in the summer. I also put her as my job referral and messaged her afterwards to let her know my application went through (with the hopes that maybe she could fast-track it through HR, which I think she did). 

In the meantime, I messaged (also on LinkedIn) another program alumnus I knew (our time overlapped a few years) who currently works with RF and we chatted on the phone about what he does at work, how he likes it there, etc. Basically an informational interview (and also to catch up as colleagues). I was also hoping he’d put in a good word for me with RF and can attest I’m a decent human being and all that. 

2 weeks later, I had a phone interview with RF, and I was super nervous going into it. I even practiced pages and pages of answers of common interview questions for a week straight. But to my surprise she opened the call with “I already know a lot about you from your CV, LinkedIn profile, and also your PhD training because we’re from the same program, so this is your chance to ask me questions!” And I was like, uhhhh awesome! The only thing she wanted to know about me was when I could start, and at that moment in time I was gunning for a July/Aug defense date. 

(I also emailed her and HR afterwards to ask them whether they could match my salary expectation, which I had researched well beforehand for what was common in the field for my position and experience, and they said they could.)

We then set up the next round of interviews for April with a colleague of RF’s who used to be in the same team but now directs her own, and RF’s boss (these would have normally been on-site, but I did them over the phone bc Covid). I again messaged my friend at the company asking if he had any tips. 

And then disaster struck! The company’s HR called me a week before those scheduled interviews to tell me the company had ordered a hiring freeze due to Covid and the effect it was having on the economy. Absolute bummer :( :( :(

So I then applied for a few more positions here and there, including some post-docs (which I really didn’t want to do). I got 2 rounds of interviews for a Scientist position at another local company, and as of today I still haven’t heard anything from them. oh well. 

Then in June I finally heard back from RF’s company saying the hiring freeze has been lifted and whether I’m still interested? Uh, heck yes! So we continued with those 2 phone interviews I had originally scheduled back in April. They both went really well. But I still continued to apply to other positions in the meantime because I wanted to have as many options as I could. 

Then 2 weeks ago (July 7) I got THE call: they wanted to offer me the position! :D

Only problem was, we needed to settle on a start-date. They of course wanted me to start like, yesterday, but my PI wanted to push back my original defense date of Aug 28 one more week to Sept 4, and also wanted me to focus on any dissertation edits for 2 weeks after that. So my earliest start-date would be Sept 21. If you remember, my defense date shifted from “sometime in the summer” to “July/August” to now September, so I was really worried the company wouldn’t accept this. I nervously waited 2 weeks for someone to call me back, and in my head I kept thinking, “I blew it I blew it”. I even sent in a job application to another company in that time. 

But RF finally called me and said hey, no problem, we can do that! She told me she was willing to wait because I really was her perfect candidate (I had all the experience she wanted, and she said we communicated well aka our work-personalities matched). She had also just recently hired another graduate from our program, who is also a friend of mine, so she knew we would all mesh together very nicely. 

And that’s the story folks! I’ll be starting the position remotely until it’s safe to return to the building again. They’re also working with my husband to see if he’s a good candidate for some of their other open positions (we’re both in the biotech field). We’re both super excited about this new chapter in our lives. 

All this because I attended the lunch seminar RF talked at all last year and then added her on LinkedIn. When people talk about opportunities lurking behind every corner, they really did mean that. 

#job advice #gradblr #sciblr #m

[knitcrate]

Letter from our CEO

I would like to begin by saying thank you to the many people who have written in via email, through our DMs, or on social media expressing their support, understanding, and compassion as KnitCrate navigates this situation. Whenever we receive one of those messages, we share it internally with the rest of the team, and it helps boost morale and remind us why we enjoy being a part of this community. So again, THANK YOU.

The situation over the past year has been, well…to say it has been messy would be an understatement. The lack of inventory being in stock (particularly in the last 3 months), delayed shipments, and customers understandably being more budget-conscious with the uncertainties of the pandemic have all strongly impacted our sales as a company. We have been doing whatever we can to overcome it. One of the biggest challenges we’ve dealt with as a company during COVID-19 has been our supply chain, both with getting the yarn to our warehouse for kit assembly and for production of the yarn in the first place.

Issue 1: Logistics of receiving the yarn

There are two main problems affecting companies who rely on importing/exporting goods these days.

The first is that, due to COVID, there are less commercial flights. Almost all commercial flights carry the passengers up top and cargo down below. With less commercial flights, there is less opportunity to transport cargo. This causes a backlog of cargo sitting at the airports. For example, we paid our mill in mid-March to try to get what should have been the April yarn now in March (paying it a month ahead of what was planned in our budget), at which point they sent the cargo to the airport in Lima.  The cargo sat there for over a week because of the backlog of other cargo waiting to be put on a plane.  The airline finally delivered 3 pallets to the US on March 30th.  The remaining 9 pallets arrived today on March 31st.  Customs wouldn’t let us pick up the first 3 pallets until the other 9 arrived, because they wanted us to pick up the order in its entirety. We finally got clearance to pick it up earlier today.

The second issue companies are facing are capacity constraints at the ports, whether airports or ocean. All ports worldwide are working with far less employees than they were before the pandemic, which causes massive delays in being able to process shipments. This affects us with our large inbound orders but also with shipments to our international customers, as packages sometimes sit at customs in your countries for what may seem to be an eternity.  

Issue 2: Production of yarn at the mills

Because of the volume of yarn we are now ordering monthly, we have to contract with our mills 12+ months in advance. For example, as of today, all yarn orders through March 2022 are already contracted. Why the long 12-month lead time? The mills need this amount of lead time to plan their own raw materials purchases and production schedules, not just for our orders, but the orders of all their clients. Every month, we pay our mill at the time of shipment, they proceed to ship the yarn to us. Under normal circumstances, it takes a shipment by air only 1-3 business days to arrive, clear customs, and be delivered to our warehouse.  Outside of a worldwide pandemic, this is not usually an issue. The mills have plenty of time to produce yarn and deliver it the first week of each month when we need to assemble your kits and ship to you.

However, the COVID pandemic has complicated things. Both of our main mills in Peru and Italy have had periods of time where they outright closed due to government restrictions on non-essential businesses to help combat the spread of COVID in their respective countries. For example, in April/May of 2020, our Peruvian mill was closed for two months and that left us without yarn to send out in May. Due to the lead times required and the fact that most mills worldwide were (and still are) facing similar issues, looking for alternate yarn was nearly impossible. Thankfully, our team was quick on their feet and we put together a fun dye-it-yourself project using undyed yarn from our Dyer Supplier business.

During this first quarter of 2021, our Italian mill, who was originally supplying yarn from December through February, has been facing stringent lockdowns and closures in response to the recent increase in COVID cases in Italy. This disrupted their ability to produce yarn and has resulted in part of the January yarn and all of the planned February yarn not being delivered. We were horribly disappointed about this, but despite our best efforts as well as the mill’s, the production needs could not be met. Thankfully, our Peruvian mill has been able to come back online with a more regular schedule in the past few months, and we have been working with them to get yarn delivered now that was originally meant for a later month.

While this is a solution to the inventory needed for crate shipment, it presented the company with a new problem. We had to fund the purchase for this yarn outside of our budget and available funding, which has been difficult during a challenging and financially straining year. This is why we have been forced to issue a credit, as opposed to an outright refund, on those purchases. It would be impossible for the company to do both - issue a refund for all those orders at one time while allocating funds to pay for yarn ahead of time.

***

Does this situation absolutely suck? Yes. It absolutely sucks. Am I sorry that this is happening? Of course. Business owners who give a damn about their business, customers, and employees do not set out on a mission to disappoint customers or give a less-than-exceptional experience. It is more heartbreaking to me than I can explain. But we aren’t dealing with normal times. We are doing what we need to do to get the company through this temporary situation to keep delivering yarn each month, keep our team members employed, and continue to be the business so many of you have grown to love.

Unfortunately, this also means streamlining how we offer products to you as well as increasing prices. When we took over KnitCrate in mid-2016, the kits ranged in price between $45 to $65 USD. We lowered those prices significantly to $24.99, including shipping & handling, that same year. We have kept prices there since then, even though shipping costs and wool prices have skyrocketed over the past 4-5 year period.  Keeping our prices that low could not continue indefinitely. We had plans to introduce these price increases later in the year, but this situation has forced us to accelerate those changes. However, even at the new prices, we still feel there is superb value for the yarn you are receiving. Moreover, you still have access to the member discounts in the shop which gives you even more value.

I am hoping that most customers know us well enough to understand that we aren’t trying to pull a fast one or go Dr. Jekyll/Mr. Hyde on you. We would never turn into a completely different company who is out to take advantage of you. However, we recognize that these sudden changes and issues have understandably raised concerns. Among them, there have been concerns raised about the products and website that we would like to clarify:

Our Terms and Conditions have not changed since 2019 and our Privacy Policy hasn’t changed since 2017.

We will continue to include 2 skeins per crate for the traditional membership and 1 for the sock membership. The “1+ skeins” wording previously seen on the website was updated back in 2019 when we tested featuring 1 skein of ultra-luxury base in the months we featured Citrus Squeeze and Titmouse. We subsequently sent a survey to our customers asking how they would like us to approach this in the future. The answer was that the majority preferred two skeins, and so we have featured at least two skeins ever since and will continue to do so.

We had seen some comments regarding extras no longer being included in kits. Please rest assured that extras will continue being a part of your kits.

Member Central discounts, Double Down discounts, etc. will continue. These are some of the key benefits of being a member and will continue to be so.

I have come across some hard-to-read comments about how KnitCrate is going out of business or won’t be around in 2 months. Are we going through a tough situation? Yes. That is no secret. Are we disappearing in 2 months? No. Like I said above, the yarn is contracted out through March 2022 with our Peruvian mill. This mill has already come back online and is working with us to push every month contract up by 30 days. We are working overtime and making the necessary changes to get things back on track and get the shipping schedule normalized again.  

Ultimately, whether KnitCrate, or any company for that matter, stays in business or not is always in the hands of the customers. Companies can die for many reasons, but there are two overarching reasons.  

The company cannot deliver a product the customer wants. The company created a product the customer wants and is willing to pay for, but the company cannot access or deliver it to the customer.

The company cannot get customers. The company developed a product a customer doesn’t care for and isn’t willing to pay for and they go out of business.

As a company, we have predominantly been battling Reason #1 during the pandemic and are actively working on solutions within our team and with our partner mills to address the supply chain issues.  Given that our Peruvian mill was able to finish the April yarn by mid-March and ship to us early, we are looking forward to working with them on the future orders already contracted as we bump up each of those months.  Going forward, we will not be pre-selling yarn on the shop.  Yarn will only be listed for sale once it has been received into our warehouse, quality controlled, and counted. We understand that this may upset some customers who liked the ability to reserve the yarn by pre-buying it, but it is a necessary action.

That leaves us with Reason #2, and this is entirely in your hands as a customer. We offer great products, great value, and fair prices not available in most places.  In fact, I encourage anyone who has been a member with us for a long time to look at the yarn they have purchased through us over their lifetime as a customer, either through the kits or in Member Central, and tally up the savings they have earned. I don’t know many other places that can enable you to save on quality yarn as much as KnitCrate.

When it comes to business, the customer is always in charge. You vote with your dollars whether any company you buy from, including KnitCrate, stays in business or not. This is not new, though. This has always been the case, ever since we took over the company in 2016, and will always be the case. We have had to make some tough decisions during a temporarily very sh!tty situation. We made those decisions in order to stay alive and keep delivering yarn to you at affordable prices long into the future. If you will have us, we will be here working to bring you yarn with great projects at great prices.  

Thank you for your support. We hope you stay well and keep stitchin’!

- Rob and the KnitCrate Team

[tooanxiousforrivers]

been struggling real hard since the start of the year (2021, not academic year or whatever (although let’s be real the academic year as a whole has also been pretty bad)) and this culminated in me deciding to take a leave of absence from my research as of this week. I am already struggling to honor the things I was feeling that led me to this point, so here goes a diary post

first of all, I am increasingly convinced that I was just never really trained properly for the project I ended up working on. last year, prior to COVID shutdown, I was being trained on separatory techniques for carbon nanotubes. I was starting to independently push forward on new nanotube separations when COVID hit, and I spent all of shutdown reading papers about carbon nanotubes... But then when I came back to lab I was suddenly working on organic synthesis, which utilizes precisely zero of the skills I had been developing beforehand. There were a few reasons behind the change, and I initially gave it an ok when another grad student double-checked with me that I even wanted to do this new project, but what I didn’t realize at that time was that my in-lab mentor would not be able to help me with the majority of the work (basically she knew how to make one half of the molecule I wanted to make, but not the other half). that other half of the molecule turns out to be NOTORIOUSLY difficult to work with, and the only way to make any progress on it is to just work at such large scales that even a 5% yield is “good enough.” But no one working with me had the wherewithal (or cared enough) to tell me that, so all my newcomer enthusiasm died with months of failure trying to make that molecule.

so I’m working really long days, not really making anything other than “an earnest effort,” and then in November the most senior member of the lab who is a week away from defending his dissertation fucking loses it at me and one other second-year about how we are wasting time, etc, etc. We have since moved on from that as people, but it still sort of traumatized me and left me very very uncomfortable existing in that space. ended up feeling like I was under a microscope, any second not actively spent with my hands on something was a criminal offense, not eating/taking breaks... this was obviously not very sustainable and I ended up working even fewer hours, which made showing up at all even more agonizing, as I anticipated eventual future blowout. rinse and repeat. losing sleep and not getting anything done outside of lab with the anxiety of it all.

by January, I’m seriously losing it, and finally make a meeting with my advisor to try to explain things to him. I also disclose having ADHD and pin a lot of my struggle on “working on a treatment plan.” He is sympathetic and wants to help however he can, but I can’t think of anything he can do for me, so we leave things unfinished. A week later, he sets up a meeting with me (and two other second-years, all separately) to tell us we’re not spending enough time in lab, we are going to delay our prelim exams, and we’re now going to work one-on-one with a post-doc in the lab. While it was not very cool of him to do it the way he did, I actually did feel genuine relief at the time. Like maybe I would finally be able to fill in the gaps in my technical abilities with this change

HOWEVER, working with this post-doc was... not it. The first thing he suggested to me was to stick with one synthetic target (as opposed to the three I had in total), and just keep pushing on that front until it was done. This resulted in me making intermediate, purifying it, trying the next step in the synthesis, having it fail, and having to go back and make more intermediate OVER AND OVER AGAIN for weeks. It was about this time that I started uncontrollably weeping in the lab on a daily basis. (side note: the corner of lab I work in is pretty thinly populated, so no one ever saw me cry despite weeks of this going on! hooray isolation!) oh, and let’s not forget that the second-years are all TAing this semester, which conveniently chops of my schedule beyond the point of usefulness.

last week, I suddenly felt like this just wasn’t worth it anymore. could not even recognize what “it” was that was supposed to be worth it all along. professorship is a) extremely rare, b) very arduous to attain, with possibly a decade or more of grueling research, and c) possibly not even the dream job I thought it to be, once attained. I was thinking about how my husband is a fucking lawyer and can provide for us if needed. I was thinking about how this is the only life I get to live and I can’t justify spending over a decade of it literally tormenting myself and inhaling/pouring carcinogens on myself with no real promise of substantial payoff. spent all day Friday talking things out with senior lab members (actually the same guy who screamed at me in November, he’s an odd one), as well as the director of graduate studies. I resolved to get back on nanotube work, and just try to better manage my stress by getting support from others... by Sunday when I met with my advisor again, I had convinced myself that “I have all the resources I need to succeed, I just need to utilize them.”

Monday, I met with my psychiatrist, who literally asked me why I wanted to be in grad school at all. I floundered and said something vacuous, and she kinda nodded then prescribed me Prozac. I also spent Monday and Tuesday trying to get back into nanotube work, but by midday Tuesday I was already feeling the dread creeping in... and my threshold for adversity was just nil at that point, I guess, because I literally went and found both my the senior people I was working with and just flat out told them I quit. My friend helped me pack up my desk that day, and I was out the door by 3:30. Emailed my advisor after I got home. by the end of the day, I rationalized that the “precipitating event” was realizing that I don’t want to be on antidepressants, since I’ve been down that road before, and that this is not worth that.

so, spending the last couple of days talking to others and thinking about what to do next, I still don’t have an answer. everyone’s first piece of advice was to find some masters-level industry job, but right now I still feel too close to it to even see myself doing chemistry at all, or a 9-5 at all. like, part-time tutoring is the most I can entertain in my mind right now. but I know it’s better to keep the door open, and my advisor is still SOMEHOW my #1 fan, so this is just a leave of absence for the time being. the details of that will be hammered out once I meet with the director of my program, but right now I know I’ll continue my TA work (since I hope I’ll get to still be paid) and I’ll finish the class I’m taking since my advisor told me the whole grade is just going to be some 30 minute presentation at the end of the semester, and I am pretty sure I can pull that off rather than end with a W on my transcript.

the main things for me to figure out are: (1) do I want to pull together a non-thesis master’s defense in the next month, to secure a master’s in case I decide not to return after my leave of absence? (2) do I feel that a leave of absence will make a difference at all? Will coming back to the lab after some time away resolve the problems I’ve been having, or will it all just build up all over again? and (3) do I still want a Ph.D-dependent career? What do I even want to do?

[mj-md]

Thoughts

Hi friends. It’s me, MJ.

Since we last chatted I leveled up to PGY-2! I’m almost 3 months into my second year of residency and boy, do I have some thoughts. 

Thought #1: senioring is hard

Being a senior has certainly come with its challenges. Sure, I knew that I would have to know the bigger picture of the patients and be expected to manage an entire team of 15-20 patients. I knew that I’d have to help my interns figure out their workflow, make sure the sub-interns are getting enough experience, and that the medical students feel like they’re part of the team. I knew that I’d have to stay late on some days to finish up work for the night team and give sign out to the night team. 

But I didn’t know that finding the balance of doing just enough to help out the interns without overstepping them or doing everything would be so hard.

I’m a go-getter. I like to get tasks done, and it’s been difficult for me to sit back and be hands-off and let the interns get the experience of calling consults, calling pharmacies, and doing discharges. I know it’s important for them to learn these tasks, but when I have rotators that are unfamiliar with the system that are learning how to do admissions, write notes, and put in orders sometimes it’s just easier to do myself. 

Thought #2: your team is your team

If your interns miss something, if labs aren’t ordered correctly or imaging isn’t scheduled right, it falls back on you. I felt this very hard today when a patient got an MRI of the abdomen & pelvis instead of a whole body MRI like the consulting physician recommended. (In my defense, this was not relayed to me personally and the consulting physician’s note was completed after I left work so these recommendations were not known to me until the next day.) But still, since I am the senior on the team I should have recognized this lack of foresight and planned accordingly. 

Thought #3: it’s exhausting

Since I have to stay late to give sign out, tidy up loose ends for the night team, and follow-up on every little detail, I often stay 1-2 hours after my shift has ended. I’ve worked 70 hours a week in the last two weeks and 23 in the last two days. I have little time for anything else when I get home and as a result have barely seen my fiance. Trying to make time for self-care, but it’s not the easiest.

Thought #4: it’s compiling

I’m on a current 3 month stretch of inpatient floor blocks. I finished NICU, now I’m on the busiest inpatient service in the hospital right now, and next month I move on to inpatient heme/onc where the hours are 6-6 and you get two weekends off. Oh, and I’m by myself. 

On top of my current schedule, trying to finish all the mandated busy work (ILPs, annual learning modules, IHI modules), trying to coordinate and run a new QI project I started last year, do a literature review for a research project, and participate in 2-3 other projects, I’m starting to feel stretched thin. 

Oh, and not to mention I’m also trying to plan my postponed COVID wedding and my elopement in November. 

And stressing about my chief interviews later this month.

And also trying to be a good senior.

Cue the mental breakdown.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

All in all, it’s been everything and not at all what I expected. We had a wellness lecture today about physician burnout that I think just put a lot of things into perspective for me about how I’m feeling. Writing this post is sort of my way of getting all my thoughts out and to cope with how I’m doing. To end this post, here are some good things that I’m doing in order to allow myself to be the best version of myself that I can be:

1. I reached out to my therapist today to schedule a long overdue session.

2. I bought two bags of Halloween candy for my team to bring in tomorrow.

3. I created a gift bag of goodies for one of my co-seniors who didn’t get the job that she applied for to make her feel better.

4. Tonight I sat down and emailed a bunch of people for the wedding aka the officiant, the restaurant I want to host the after meal celebration at, and the hotels for our new wedding room block.

5. I’m going to share this post with my fiance since I didn’t have the energy to organize all of these thoughts earlier when I came home.

6. I’m going to go to bed now.

If you made it this far, thanks for reading along. We can do this, friends.

#personal mjmd #mj is a pgy2 #senior up #level up #senioring #pediatrics residency

[themarydragon]

My Chainsaws

I didn’t write a word of fiction in two years.  The metaphor we use at my house is Juggling Chainsaws.  I am mostly in control of my life. A lot of what’s happening is full-on terrible, and it’s very very hard to manage. Imagine juggling chainsaws. It takes every ounce of your focus. “Why don’t you ask for help?” They’re chainsaws, for fuck’s sake, it’s nothing I can just lob at passersby. 

So lemme tell you about my chainsaws.

First and foremost, I went back to school. Grad school! I’m a little over 2/3 done with my MSN - a Master’s in Nursing. My focus is on Global Public Health and whoo boy what insane timing the pandemic had for my class. Wow. But full time grad school isn’t anything I can get help with, really, so it was 100% my problem. If it were JUST grad school, I would still have been able to write between semesters and during holidays.

I have mentioned in a few places that my dad was diagnosed with cancer in November of 2017. He had surgery to remove it and was declared cancer free. That June was my 10th wedding anniversary, and my husband & I renewed our vows. Dad came out to see us (I live 1600 miles away, on the coast; Dad’s in my Midwest home town) and spent a week at my house for the first time since my wedding. (To be fair, his ex-wife lived here the last time he visited... he got a hotel). A month later, he went in for a routine check and they found spots on his liver. Metastatic adenocarcinoma. He had an entire lobe of his liver removed - the incision did not heal properly and herniated at one end, affecting his ability to heal. He had a port put in and started chemo. I spent as much time with him as I could. I remember sitting at his bedside, laptop out, trying to write and just... nothing came out. But! My daddy’s a badass and my stepmother is a rockstar and he had me advocating him as hard as I could - and lemme tell you I will shit all over a doctor if I need to, I don’t care if he’s a full bird colonel. Dad survived ten rounds of a really strong chemo and he’s been cancer-free for a year now. The day we got his very first post-chemo scan result, I was standing next to my mother’s bed in the ICU.  She’d texted me “help” at 2:30 in the morning, the night after her birthday. I called 911, raced to her house, beat the EMS to her door, and found her on her couch in her living room. We had her at the hospital by 3:30, in the Cath lab at a quarter ‘til 5, and off oxygen & asking to go home by 1 that afternoon. She’d survived a STEMI - the “big one”, the heart attack generally called a widowmaker. I went from helping my dad navigate American medicine directly into helping my mother recover from something with a 4 or 6% survival rate. 

Did I mention that was on her birthday? It was April.  In July, my brother (by choice, but my parents both agreed to my adoption of him) who lives with us finally hit rock bottom. I spent another night in the emergency room, this time getting him admitted to an inpatient facility to prevent him from taking his life. If I didn’t hate American Medicine by then, that tipped me over. We’d been trying to find him help for YEARS, but insurance doesn’t do you any good if nobody takes it, and the people who DO take it aren’t taking new clients. HIs inpatient admission got him a prescribing provider and a fucking therapist, at long last, and he was finally starting to get some enjoyment out of life.

Until December the 28th, when his beloved brother Brandon was killed in a freak work accident. That one still hurts too much to write much about. We still don’t have his death certificate (fuck you, OSHA) or his goddamn ashes and not one drop of closure.

Adding injury to injury, my husband’s service dog, Dango, reached the end of his life in early February. I’d been essentially running hospice for him for 14 months; he got medication at least 4 and sometimes 8 times a day, as I continuously tweaked his care to keep him as comfortable as I could for as long as he still enjoyed life. The day he didn’t know who his Dad was anymore was his last day. Luckily, it was the first sunny day this spring, and he got one last nap in a sunbeam on the deck. We’re not done grieving that loss yet, either.

And then, did you hear there is a pandemic? Let me tell you, it is a HELL of a time to be a nurse. It is INSANE being a nursing *student* right now. Luckily, the facility where I work closed within a week of public schools closing, and we’ve had all our kids in more or less quarantine since then... My boss’ father died of COVID, so our organization hasn’t escaped untouched, but so far all our staff and all our kids are OK. And, since I’m the per diem, I’m not working and I’m not getting paid. My husband owns a small retail store - no work for him either. Both my parents are high risk... but they both work in medical-adjacent fields (Dad works for Big Pharma, Mom works for Huge Name Health Insurance) so they’re being taken care of. Dad’s home-with-pay and my mom’s been working from home since March 4. 

My semester wrapped, my parents are home safe, my husband & I are home safe, I’m literally trained to go into infectious situations and come out clean, so my weekly shopping trips are as low risk as possible... and the boys are waiting for me with bleach solution and box cutters, to clean what can’t be unpackaged before bringing it into the house.

So what do I with my sudden time?

First, I fucking deal with all this crap. Holy shit. I spent two weeks just sleeping and playing Animal Crossing and trying to take care of myself and clearing out the Grief Backlog. I bought Tevinter Nights and it was the first book I’d read for enjoyment in longer than I care to admit. And then, three days ago... I started to write.

I finished Steel Your Heart. I churned out 15k words in three sittings, and finally sealed the gaps between all the sections I had written. I am going to start posting again once AO3′s email system is fixed so my subscribers know WTF is happening. And then I’m going to try to take this momentum and turn it towards the other delinquent WIPs that I’ve been gnawing on unproductively for two years. 

I can’t promise my life will stay calm, and I will be able to keep writing. It is the nature of life - it is only a matter of time before somebody tosses me another chainsaw. But I’m out of school until September... so let’s see how far I can get before something tries to stop me.

#real life #update #fanfic #fanfic writer #TW: cancer #TW: suicide #TW: death

[luisa-writes]

Cayetano Political Dynasty

Abstract

The People Power Revolution sparked change all over the Philippines and liberated the vast majority of Filipinos from oppression and issues of similar nature. Consequently, Filipinos were free from verbal restrainment and have played a huge factor in voicing new ideas, constructive criticism, and analytical thinking in terms of political matters over the decades. Unfortunately, the country still faces corruption and mediocrity from politicians who swore equity and justice. There has seemed to be a conspicuous pattern over the years as to the causes of political corruption and incompetence: political dynasties. The topic of political dynasties has seemed to stir controversy amongst the politically aware, principally because it demotes political competition and historically results in an abuse of powers. In the following pages, the researchers will be tackling comprehensive information about one of the most familiar political dynasties in our generation today, the Cayetano Dynasty. The family’s background, the beginning of their dynasty, their political history, programs and laws, and issues they are associated with will be introduced and discussed informatively.

Summary

 The Cayetano dynasty began with Rene Cayetano, a lawyer, journalist, television presenter, and politician who gained recognition for his efforts and sincere devotion to crime prevention and improvement of the criminal justice system. Rene Cayetano was not wealthy during his early political journey as he had been a working student during the time where he was working for a law degree. Despite this, Rene Cayetano was extremely intelligent as he had studied at the University of the Philippines and had even procured a scholarship grant in the United States. Rene Cayetano married Sandra Schramm, and together they had four children. Because of Rene Cayetano’s popularity and expertise in the field of politics, his children were influenced to undergo the same path he had taken. Rene Cayetano’s intelligence was naturally passed down to his four children who have graduated from prestigious universities such as the University of the Philippines and Ateneo University. The Cayetanos are presently wealthy, but in contrast to other known politicians, they were not as rich but not entirely poor either. A study had shown that in 2013-2014, Alan Peter Cayetano was one of the poorest members of the Senate with a net worth of 23 million pesos. In 2020, it was shown that Pia Cayetano was listed 10th as one of the richest members of the Senate.

 Rene Cayetano paved the way for the family’s political journey to begin when he was the Senator of the Philippines from 1998-2003. Pia Cayetano, his eldest daughter, took office after him in 2004-2016 and 2019-present day. Alan Peter Cayetano, Rene Cayetano’s eldest son, began his political journey as a member of the Municipality of Taguig from 1992-1995. He, later on, became the Vice Mayor of the Taguig Municipality, a senator from 2007-2017, and is presently a Congressman representing Pateros-Taguig. Ma. Laarni Cayetano, Alan Peter Cayetano’s wife, also became part of their family’s dynasty. She became a congresswoman of the Pateros-Taguig in 2007, later became the city’s mayor in 2010, and finally became a congresswoman in Taguig’s 2nd district. Rene Cayetano’s last two sons, Lino Edgardo Cayetano and Renren Cayetano also rose to power just like the other Cayetanos. Lino Edgardo Cayetano became a barangay chairman of Fort Bonifacio in 2010, later became a congressman of the 2nd district, and was elected mayor in 2019. Renren Cayetano was a Muntinlupa councilor in 2001 and ended his career in 2007.

 The Cayetanos are well-known for their activeness in the field of politics and have even provided significant contributions to the nation. As a senator and former prosecutor, Rene Cayetano was able to legalize a number of republic acts that highlight criminal prevention and improvement. An example is Administrative Order No. 51-96 which designates special criminal courts in cities to hear cases involving heinous crimes and finish the trial within 60 days. Other than this, Rene Cayetano filed Resolution No. 579 to fight for the ban on the collection of parking fees, R.A. 8972 which aims to provide benefits to single Filipino parents, and R.A. 8975 which is an act to ensure implementation and completion of government infrastructure projects by prohibiting lower courts from issuing temporary restraining orders. In addition, Rene Cayetano provided free legal advice to television and radio listeners through a weekly television program entitled “Companero y Companera.”

 Rene Cayetano’s eldest daughter, Senator Pia Cayetano, sponsored the “Bayanihan to Heal as One Act.”, alongside several other senators. Pia uploaded promotional videos and statements regarding this as a contribution. The Bayanihan to Heal as One Act is an act that outlines the government’s response to Covid19 and promoted funding for programs for 18 million poor families. Pia also sponsored the Bayanihan to Recover as One Act or “Bayanihan 2”, a measure that involves a Post-Covid recovery plan. Other than this, Senator Pia Cayetano established a program named “Pilipinas In Action” or PIA, which is to provide assistance to the vulnerable sectors in the country during the pandemic.

 As chairman of the Committee on Education, Alan Peter Cayetano initiated efforts in educational loans and scholarships more accessible to Filipino students; R.A. 9500 or “University of the Philippines Charter Act of 2008”. He implemented this because he believed that, in order to fight corruption, Filipinos must be empowered and educated. Secondly, as chairman of the Committee on Public Information and Mass Media, Alan Peter Cayetano campaigned for the “Freedom of Information Act” to become law in order to increase transparency and accountability. This act provides improved access to information for the Filipinos and became a bill in 2012.

 Despite the Cayetanos’ above-average intelligence and praiseworthy contributions, some of the members of the family have been repeatedly involved in national controversy and problems. One issue that had occurred years back was when Alan Peter Cayetano defended the controversial war on drugs. In an event with Asia Society, he talked about the Philippine war on drugs with a verbal justification that "The Philippines had no other choice and not acting on it will let drugs take over the Philippines." He had also stated that all the police brutality and killings were not the root effects of the war on drugs, and these issues had existed beyond the time that the war on drugs was declared. Many Filipinos were infuriated by his defense, 'blind' vigilantism, and utter confidence during this speech last 2017.

 The second issue that the Cayetanos were associated with was when Alan Peter Cayetano launched a congress bloc entitled "BTS Sa Kongreso". Much like the South Korean septet that it was based on, the bloc comprised of seven members from the Congress. This bloc received backlash from BTS Fans, fellow politicians, and Filipinos. Senior Deputy Speaker Salvador said that the launching of Cayetanos' House bloc was "an obvious publicity stunt and gimmickry." BTS fans even launched the hashtag #CayetanoStopUsingBTS which trended on Twitter, with over 7,000 tweets. Other fans had decided to take a different route and decided to send an email directly to BTS' music label, Big Hit Entertainment regarding "unauthorized use of artist imagery and trademarks in publications" and spread the notice on Twitter.

 Alan Peter Cayetano held up a sign “Together with doctors and frontliners, we went to work for you, so please stay home for us.” Later on, reports said that politicians and their families were receiving special treatment and getting tested for the Coronavirus despite not showing any symptoms. It was stated in one news article that Cayetano and other politicians were getting tested for COVID-19 not just once but twice despite the utter lack of test kits for the frontliners who are continually and more exposed to the virus. Because of this, #ANGKAKAPAL went viral on social media platforms.

 On October 2, 2020, Velasco accused Alan Peter Cayetano of blackmailing Duterte into holding the 2021 budget hostage if his term was not extended. Velasco noted that Cayetano did not want to step down yet from the speakership post at the House of Representatives due to a “budget”. Velasco appealed to Cayetano to resign as House Speaker on October 14.

Conclusion

Isabelle The Cayetano family was able to accomplish great things despite their relatively new presence in the field of politics which contrasts the older and more well-known political dynasties. They have had their fair share of contributions to the nation, but are not entirely along the lines of what is rightfully deemed as "noble politicians". Similar to other political dynasties, the Cayetano family has been involved in issues and controversy which shape them to be disputable politicians (in terms of whenever or not they are corrupt or righteous).   Personally, I commend the family for being politically active, but my doubts are placed on my own personal dilemma. It is hard to say if the Cayetanos are praiseworthy for their political activeness or their willingness to carry out a political dynasty and its deleterious effects.

Luisa The Cayetano family had their fair share of politics. They contributed both good and bad projects to our country. It was evident that they went through a lot to get where they are now, they were able to gain a reputation despite not being that well-known. Although I'm grateful for all their positive contributions to our nation, I am still hesitant to support them wholeheartedly. The negative outcomes of their projects still greatly affect their name.

Josef The entire Cayetano family started off their journey on a clean slate and successfully rose to power. They’ve been through a lot of ups and downs to gain power at a very young age. They implemented many programs for the betterment of the country although it had some flaws. Even though I highly value their services to the country, I get the feeling that I only support them a bit. When problems arise in their projects, it slowly tarnishes their name.

Raffy The Cayetano family has done many things to improve the country, things which can make you say that they are great people and see how much they care for the country. Even after the controversies, you can see that they can still do good things despite their wrongdoings, I have to get credit because they were not a well-known political family but they still made a name in that area despite being new. They did good things for sure, but those good things do not outshine their wrongdoings to our country, therefore I cannot say I fully support them. They could have been a strong family with a lot of supporters, but due to the controversy and horrible outcomes of their projects, their name is already negatively affected to the point where it is hard to support them.

Steffan Much like most other things, the Cayetano actually has it's generally good side and it's more questionable bad side. While it's actually had it's contributions, it's also had it's fair share of controversy with the whole BTS thing, the stand on the war on drugs, and others. Their contributions and the work that they've put into the country are definitely admirable and respectable, however, you cannot ignore their more questionable actions. I definitely commend them for their efforts, but that's about it. I do not personally support any individual, and hold a neutral stance towards the individuals themselves, nonetheless, I still support any movements I find reasonable and detest the more questionable decisions and actions.

Group Conclusion In conclusion, we recognize the Cayetano Family’s contributions and political efforts for the betterment of society and praise them for making a name for themselves despite being younger compared to other political dynasties. On a personal level, however, we can say that we support their reasonable decisions, but we cannot really say that we support their dynasty or political members as a whole because they are not entirely “clean” politicians.

[lockdownuk]

Lockdown Diary Part 10

A personal account during the lockdown in the UK due to the Covid-19 outbreak.

23/03/2020 8:30pm Boris Johnson, UK Prime Minister, gives a live address to the nation to, effectively, put the country on lockdown to stem the spread of the deadly coronavirus strain, Covid-19.

Many of us have been self-isolating for days but this latest development within the UK in reaction to the pandemic feels very serious and very scary. I decided to keep a simple diary and where better but online. Day 271: Work was dominated by Qfiniti again, including a meeting with Jon and staff from the States, where I found my self taking control to get the next steps in process (and then, Dave Stewart, the SCCM engineer fucked off and put an OOO message on Teams telling me he’s off until Tuesday (it’s Thursday)...and I am off on Monday!) But, I have to say this project does float my boat. Got a text message and then a call from PCH for another laser eye appt this coming Monday at 12.30pm. I mentioned to the lady that phoned that I will have to square it with work (I won’t, but she doesn’t know that) as I can’t afford to lose my job - it just seems the hospital, while under pressue with the admin and the clinic availability - I get it! - just aren’t seeing the issues for the patients. Plus, Peterborough has been declared a Tier 3 from Sunday under the new lockdown scheme, the highest tier. Great...I really want to travel to a highly infected area! managed to find an online booze shop that does Gordon’s and Famous Grouse and will deliver beforee Chrimbo, so I’ve placed the order for dad and Rita’s gift. I spoke with Dad today, he hasn’t heard about his vaccination yet which is a surprise (he’s in the first draft being over 80)

Day 272: Typing on day 273. Work was that manic shit at the end of the dya when I’ve got time off. I am only off on Moday but still had to tie up loose ends, complictaed further by Jon being off next week and Sueanne off this week and the Qfiniti project! In the evening I only mamaged three beers. I ate too much. Plus my sugars were all over the place and way too high! I ordered a torch a couple of days ago (£17), it arrived today. It takes rechargeable batteries or 3 AAAs. Apparently, to get the best performance (i.e. brightness) you need the rechargeable batteries in it, so i charged ‘em. Fucking hell, I’m glad I did - it’s brighter than the sun. It opens up my late walks in winter, for sure.

Day 273: While it was a very late (but sober) night yesterday (gone 4am before lights out) I was up before midday. Usual walking etc. plus gave the bathroom a clean (albeit with wipes, but I did mop the floor - and used the water to also mop the kitchen). Now I am about to stick a pizza in the oven, plus wedges (to have with microwaveable chip shop curry sauce) and watch This Is 40 which is coincidentally on telly tonight - the coincidence being clips of it are on TikTok a lot right now. I am on my second beer and am going to have a smoke right now as well. Lastly for this entry, I have been using my AudioPro speaker today, it pisses me off it’s not WiFi capable but, thru Bt, it does sound fucking good - revisiting James works very well to demonstrate the speaker’s prowess.

Day 274: I have another Paypal a/c. I have been getting emails to my standard gmail account from Paypal saying they are going to charge me £9 for an inactive account which I have been largely ignoring since my paypal a/c has a specific email address. Anyway, I tried to log in, after a password reset and, hey presto, I do have another one, with £35 in it, having just been fleeced of £9 for the aforementioned inactivity, fuckers. It’s registered with the old Market Place address and phone. When I try to transfer the £35 to my card, it wants to confim it’s me by calling the phone, which I can’t amend. Oh, and you can’t contact Paypal direct. Fuck knows what to do! Other than that, usual Sunday, a tad more relaxed since I have tomorrow off, but not that much now I have an eye appointment in Tier 4 Peterborough (it’s been up’d from tier 3)! Up at 1.30 pm (I watched This is 40 and The Guvners last night with lots of beer), feeling worse for wear but, stair climb and a 6 miler acheived!

Day 275: I was at the hospital for 3 hours. The laser clinic didn’t start until 1.30pm so, why my appointment was at 12.20, not even the consultant could understand. 15 minutes of lasering - horrible but I am used to it. It took so long it pretty much fucked my day off up completely. I got a Christmas card from Karen, in the actual post, so, a mail shot. It’s depressing.

Day 276: Back to work and it’s definitely in wind down mode. I’ve decided to compile a list of things I have done this year. It will be on the postive side, such as all the steps I’ve walked and getting an article published about my photography, but it will also include randon facts like getting bitten by a dig twice and not having a haircut. I’ll get it done so I can post in at new year, hopefully be a little inspiring, a little silly and a lot of showing off!

Day 277: Work, again, was quiet. It’s fucking pissing down now, as I type at 21:50, and has been all day. It’s causing havoc and there’s flooding everywhere. I could walk down St. Peter’s Road tonight ‘cos of it (had to go up New Road, Springfield Road, down Latham Road). Soaked a lunhtime and tonight! With a new variant of Coronavirus, France stopped frieght crossing the border. That’s now been resolved but tyeh back log has/is affecting certain food stocks in the shops, of which, fresh veg might affect me for Christams dinner (I plan to do a chicken breast with stuffing, pigs in blankets, yorkshire pud and shed loads of veg. I’ll nip to Co-Op tomorrow morning and see what’s vaialble. It’s a half day at work ‘cos of Christmas Eve, so I can nip out somewhere in the car if need be, as ong as the flooding has subsided. Or I could just get shitfaced and have burgers and pizza.

Day 278: Christmas Eve. Sueanne let me finish at 11.00am so, very shortly thereafter, off for a walk I went; it turned out to be a stop/start affair - flooding as the Nene had burst its banks, ended up doing more of a circuit round town. Bumped into Andy Smith (and his son) and, after that, Ash and Denise. Ended up doing just under 11.5km in 2 and a half hours.Knackered! As I type, I have a chilli on the stove, beer on the go, all the veg and chicken breast bought with no shortages, as feared, for tomorrow’s lunch and looking forward to eating. getting drunk, smoking, listening to music, watching telly....all over the next two/three days.

Day 279: I don’t even remember going to bed last night. As a direct result I got out of bed at 2.30pm. I couldn’t even be bothered with Christmas dinner, let alone anything else like exercise. I’m just about to have chilli for dinner (it’s 8.10pm). Watch some telly then try an go to sleep before midnight. No booze! I did talk to dad earlier. Day 280: Typing on day 281. A better, more productive day. Up @11.00am exercise and walk as usual, although the walk was a different route due to flooding. In the evening I could hear ‘storm Bella’ raging, so windy! I cooked a christmas dinner of sorts, chicken breast with Thyme, all the veg, roasted spuds and parsnip, stuffing (a first for me, albeit co-op stuffing mix), Yorkshie and pigs in blankets. It was smashing! A few beers and The Hitman’s Bodyguard, alays a fun watch. A better day, as I say, but I am feeling particular deflated this Christmas. Day 281: Typing on day 282. I realised, about mid afternoon, that Monday (tomorrow) is a bank holiday so no work. It was a great realisation but, also, worrying that it dawned on my like I’m an old person! Nevertheless, a nice long walk - bumped into Baz & Kate and had a nice long chat, then El & Camila, Aaron and Eva for another, shorter chat. I also saw Denise & Ash along the way. Fog video called later in the evening for a chat too (he told me how he fell asleep at the dinner table, fuck he makes me laugh - unwittingly - when I need it most!) A regular social fest! A repeat of last night’s dinner and a few beers - it was a good day albeit I am in a proper low ebb.

Day 282: Up at midday after a 4am-er. A very long walk (1.75 hours) and a hodge podge dinner (remaining chilli, roasted spuds and peppers, steamed cauliflower and runner beans, grated cheese) - it’s nearly ready, I’ll type the review tomorrow. I realise that this is the first time in 21 Christmases that I have at least talked to K. Is that connected to my mood slump? I reckon so. So, as that fact dawned on me, I then considered, should it be the case next Christmas, it will not be the first in along time and, as such, more manageable....fuck knows how I manage to accentuate any little positive but, thank goodness I do. Day 283: Work was a sedate affair today, fuck all to do really. Sueanne is now follwing me on Insta...I shall invetsigate on how to exclude posts to individuals, methinks. Tea, last night, was fucking lovely. More of the same tonight-ish - currently I am roasting spuds, peppers, garlic, chillies, tomatoes - it’ll all go with left over pigs-in-blankets (5) and a burger. I’ll have bisto beef with mustard on it. I can’t wait! Day 284: Typing on day 285. That meal was fucking lush! Checked on the car todfay and it would not start. Something is draining the battery so I will have to give it a run every day until I can get Julian to sort it. So, I WhatsApp’d Karen to borrow the portable starter. She dropped it off for me. We had the briefest of chats at the doorstep, first time we’ve spoken in weeks. She mentioned my hair! Day 285: NYE. I have just got back from walking to Cottersock and back. I would not have been able to do so without my new torch! I finished and published my double letter quiz on FB, including to the Virtual Pub group and the Oundle Chatter. It’s had some good feedback, I’m rather proud of it. I am going to make chicken casserole now (with dumplings - a first for me, I even bought some flour), have some beers and get a bit stoned. Before that, I am going to finish off my list of things I’ve done this year, including steps wlaked and hours listening on Spotify. I am quite proud of that list too.

Day 286: I fucked the dumplings up, added too much water, so that didn’t happen but the chicken casserole was good, just about to finish it for tea tonight. I also had pizza last night and went to bed at 5am. I have had a lot of good feedback on my list of 2020 achievements. I proud of it. K sent a happy new WhatsApp last night, around 00.30.

Day 287: No booze last night, so I was up before the alarm today (about 10.00am) Two walks, one on my own, another with Fog with a couple of beers. I fucking loved it! Watching datrts (World champs semi finals - been texting Dan while the first one has been on). Going to watch The Aviator later...I’ve not seen it before which surprises me. Why it surprises me I do not know, since I know I haven’t seen it. How the fuck can I be surprised by a fact I’m completely aware of? Day 288: I didn’t watch The Aviator ‘cos Logan Luck was on at 11:55pm on ITV4. Great fildm...I can’t believe that I very nearly paid for it (rent from Sky or Amazon). A late one last night and quite pissed. Thinking about it, having afew beers with Fog in the afternoon made it quite a long sesh for me! Up at just gone midday today, nice long walk (Cotterstock) which was mde long by a painful right ankle - I must have turned or twiested slightly sometime. Still, it survived. Back to work tomorrow - Chrimbo and New Year all done and dusted for the 55th time in my life!

Day 289: First day back at work of 2021. Boris announces another full lockdown in England (there’s a new strain of Covid19 which is seeing huge numbers of infections every day, over 50,000 per day).

Day 290: Something is up with my right foot, the little toe pad. It’s bloody sore. If it gets any worse it’ll affect my walking and exercise. I phoned Anne Bennison to talk about it, she just wants me to go and see her which i donlt want to do if poss, pandemic and all that.

Day 291: Wearing my sandals instead of the M&S slippers and my foot/toepad is already feeling bteer. However, I did inspect my Merrell boots, just in case, and the sole on te right is really worn down, in just three months. I have sent a WhatsApp to CotswoldOutdoors, where I got them from....let’s see what they say! It’s all kicking off i  the US - pro Trump protestors have storm the Capitol Building, where congrees was being held. Only in ‘Merica.

Day 292: Busy at work with rolling out Qfiniti - all that project work was pretty much for fuck all since the SCCM package has to hand held. It’s feckin’ freezing today, below freezing, slippy af on my walks. I have been shopping tonight, £106 in Corby Tesco. That does include 8 cans of sapporo.

Day 293: The fracas at Capitol Hill on Wednesday left 5 dead, it looks like Trump will be impeached. He’s already said he’ll not attend Biden’s inauguration. In a fucking world gone mad, it’s another level of madness. It’s really cold -3℃ tonight, more of the same tomorrow. Makes for brisk walks. I’ve just had chicken balti pie and chips for tea. It was so nice that I burnt the roof of my fucking gob. I’m on the Sapporo and about to have a smoke then watch Jack Reacher. I’ve (kinda) earnt after the first 5 day week for a while.

Day 294: Well, last night saw another late one...5am by the time I :went to sleep. Up at 2pm today with no instention of any exercise or walking or housework or fuck all, really. But, I did my exercises and a 9 mile walk. While I walked I came across Banners, quick 15 min chat and listed to Stage by David Bowie. He’s all over the radio right now as it’s his death’s anniversary tomorrow and his birthday yesterday. It’s a fucking good live album. A few beers tonight, eating trash, watching FA Cup highlights then End of Watch later.  Posh played today (first time in a while due to Covid infections) drew away to (shitty) Lincoln 1-1. Good point as Posh were down to ten men after 67 mins for a second yellow for handball in the area. Lincoln missed the pen. Fucking funny. Chorley, the non leaguers who knocked Posh out in round 2 of the FA Cup, beat Derby in round 3 today (albeit derby fielded an academy side of 11 first timers due to Covid ) - a great day for them!

Day 295: Up at 2pm swearing blind I’d not walk or exercise (again!) but, of course I did. I’ve done over 25 miles this w/e! End of Watch was brilliant last night. Well worth a rewatch, so emotional. I am making butter chicken as I type. I’ve added extra onion, garlic and, of course, chillies. It’s the spiciest butter chicken I have ever tasted! 

Day 296: One of those frustrating days at work when no problem of request I try to resolve goes without a hitch. After a 7km walk in the evening, took the car for a spin and cleaned the bathroom. Fucking knackered. It’s 11:30pm and I’m in bed typing this on the iPad! despite getting up so late, I feel knackered. 11pm bedtime for me, I reckon.

Day 297: Fucking busy at work, the States rolled out a new Okta trust policy and it caused mayhem. Meant my evening walk didn’t start ‘til gone 6pm. When I got back, clened the hall and stairs, made chilli (which I am about to have for tea (gone 10.15pm!) and showered. I’m, again, fucking knackered! Posh played Portsmouth in the EFL Trophy 3rd round at home. Won 5-1. Nice.

Day 298: Had an electrician rouind for the EICR cetrt. He was here until 2pm and it was a pain in the arse, having to work upstairs plus, with having to cut the electricity, all the smart devices lost their settings. And it was freezing up there.

Day 299: Work was impossibly infuriating. Not one pc remote session went to plan! It was pissing down a lunchtime during my walk but, I have to say, the cheap TargetDry coat copes fine in heavy rain for short periods. Everywhere is flooding again even though the rain turned to sleet. By my evening walk, it was dry but bloody cold. Then, when I got in I cleaned the kitchen and mopped the floor and the bathroom’s as well. I fucking done in! Chatted to dad today - same as ever!

Day 300: What a fucking work at week! I am so glad it’s Friday. To celebrate, I ordered new walking boots: Scarpas £121!

#diary #Tumblr diary #lockdown #COVID19 #lockdownuk

[alexistudies]

Spring ‘20 Semester Reflection

Hi everyone! So, I’m trying to make it a routine to reflect after every semester on this blog so 1) I can keep you guys updated on my trials and tribulations and 2) although I reflect with my advisors, its a nice to put it in writing and have something to refer to when the next semester comes!

This post is going to be broken into 3 pieces:

explaining how i implemented my “places for improvement” outlined in my Fall ‘19 reflection in Spring ‘20

talking about my highlights this past semester

outlining my “places for improvement” for Fall 2020

Let’s get started!

How I implemented my “places for improvement” outlined in my Fall ‘19 Reflection

improvement number one: falling off around the second round of midterms

Hm, this time around, I don’t think that happened. The way I nipped this in the bud was by pacing myself more at the beginning so I didn’t burn out by week 9. Last semester, I was on a constant push to redeem myself since I was making up two classes, but this semester was more of just trying to improve overall. I was also excited because I was finally able to move onto classes that were more interesting to me!

improvement number two: not doing well on a single test in ChE 200 because of not dedicating enough time to it

Well, this honestly repeated itself into spring ‘20 with ochem. but, I’m trying to give myself some grace considering my professor’s tests were ridiculously harder than the other professors’ exams. he even said that he makes his tests EXTREMELY hard. I only got a passing grade on one test, HOWEVER, considering I didn’t do well on any tests in ChE 200...this is some improvement. I tried to equally divide my time up this semester between classes and it seems like it paid off more. It’s just hard to find that balance when you’re in 4 classes at once. Even as i go into my 4th year, it is still something I’m trying to figure out. [note: will reflect on ochem later in the post]

Highlights

dealing with faculty (self-advocacy, building relationships, etc)

My thermo professor wasn’t that great this semester, and he never returned assignments or told us what grades we had until he submitted final grades. when I saw that I got a ‘C’, I emailed him and asked for an assignment-by-assignment breakdown of how I got a C. after some deliberation, he changed my final grade to a B! I was so proud of myself; instead of letting it slide, I challenged him and got what I deserved: a B. This was a big step for me, especially because I need my GPA to go up a bit for grad school apps (which I’ll be starting next fall) and I just knew he was in the wrong.

I, also, was able to start building a relationship with my current faculty mentor by taking a leap of faith! McNair was definitely a push for this, but I’m still glad I did it. I went to her office hours, nervous as hell, but she was so sweet and I found someone who shares the same passion as me. Now, I’m a research assistant in her lab. Its amazing.

taking a class outside of my comfort zone

To keep it 100 with anyone who reads this, these STEM classes can get monotonous and dry. So, forcing myself to take a class that wasn’t STEM was so nice and enlightening! I learned so much about how families manage resources, how their management style affects how they make decisions, and the like. It was so refreshing and it was nice to have a class to turn to when I needed a break that wasn’t so taxing. see, GEs aren’t always bad! lol

Places for Improvement

Implementing a Bloom’s Taxonomy focused study method

My ochem professor was just cruel. Idk what else there is to say about him without getting redundant, but he intentionally made his tests and quizzes impossible. I did the best I could, which resulted in me not passing by 4% (I opted for CR/NC so my GPA wouldn’t be affected). Early in the semester, I asked him for study tips and he said learn concepts and study from the book, which is what I was doing, but that was just bullshit advice. THEN, at the end of the semester, he gave this GREAT study method to use that was more centered around like.. Bloom’s Taxonomy language and it can apply to any class! It’s exciting because now, when I retake it, I can apply this method and I’ll do better (especially because I’ll have an easier professor). I’ll make a masterpost on this soon, as it was really eye-opening for me and made me realize small holes in my study plan.

Needing to find more balance b/w school and personal life

okay, COVID rocked my jaw and messed up my flow. as soon as we transitioned to online classes, it made it hard for me to separate class from home, and put me into constant work mode ?? so, next semester, i want to find that balance of working a little bit then relaxing or doing what i love. its funny because I had balance in Fall ‘19 and then it basically disappeared Spring ‘20. We got this next semester though, because balance is the major key *cue DJ Khaled adlibs*

Summary

Spring semesters seem to be my weak point, but this semester was a rollercoaster. Not only due to COVID, but just nothing seemed constant this past semester. But they always say that the only constant in life is change! I enjoyed this semester; I made more close friends in my major, I finished my last semester as a SWE officer and I transitioned from a more industry focused drive to more research based. It’s been a good one and I can’t wait for Fall!

#alexistudies #studyblr #studyspo #smartspo #my masterpost #engblr #stemblr