#and i know people tell me its okay to take breaks but with my major depression - art is sometimes the only thing getting me outta bed

[buckybarnesb-tch]

Religious Teachings -Klaus M.

Okay so…I may have taken the innocence thing just a bit too far? I grew up Mormon and now I have a shit load of religious trauma and I think that propelled this one a bit so…I hope it was everything you wanted and if it isn’t I’m so sorry😅 but this is probably the most fun fic that I’ve ever gotten a request for and now I want to write more like it🤣

I apologize in advance

Warnings: Major Innocence Kink which pushes its way into Dub-Con, Breeding Kink, Daddy Kink (Dd-Lg), Religious Trauma

DD:DNE

This is a Religious Fic.

Don’t Like = Don’t Read!!

It’s possible I took the innocent thing a bit too far but considering you didn’t want her to know what sex was at all I assume that’s what you wanted? I hope it’s what you intended.

If you had told Klaus that one day he would work at an all girls catholic school he wouldn’t have believed you. Here he is though, Saint Holy Mary’s School for Girls as an Art teacher and he’s never been happier.

When Klaus met Y/n he knew she was perfect, she had been home for summer break at the time and Klaus scared off some teenage boys making vulgar comments to her as she walked home. They talked for a few minutes and it didn’t take Klaus long to understand that she’s innocent. Alarmingly innocent. She’s a teenager who is almost an adult that no one has taught about sex, and while Klaus wanted to know how that’s even possible, he decided instead to just enjoy the gift he has been given in the form of his innocent little Bunny.

She was shocked to see him in the school but pleasantly surprised, she blushed whenever he spoke to her, blushed whenever she saw him in the halls or at meals and blushed whenever he complimented her projects. Klaus had spent nearly 2 months just getting her comfortable in his presence, she spends a lot of time with him and often helps him with things that get her out of different classes. Y/n loved spending time with Klaus just as much as he did with her, she proved it the first time he touched her, though she clearly hadn’t understood what was going on and he found it truly adorable.

‘Might as well just spend the rest of class here love, there’s 20 more minutes.’ She shrugged, blushing as he pulled a chair over beside him for her to sit in. She made herself comfortable and Klaus couldn’t keep from looking at her legs, the short skirt she was forced to wear everyday showing several inches above her mid thigh and he couldn’t stop from imagining them wrapped around his head. ‘So, tell me Y/n, what made your parents choose this school for you? Were you too naughty for them to control anymore or did your parents go here?’ Once again her face was red as she quickly corrected him.

‘My mom went here! I didn’t-I’m not-‘

‘I was teasing love, I know you’re the most innocent girl here.’ He was still teasing her, wanting to see how she would react and she didn’t disappoint him.

‘I’m not that innocent. I just don’t like to break the rules…my dad never paid much attention to me when I was a kid unless I did something right so breaking the rules wasn’t really an option I guess…I don’t like-‘

‘You don’t like people to be disappointed in you. It’s a good thing, but I don’t think anyone could be disappointed in you Bunny, you’re perfect.’ He could practically smell the blood rushing to her cheeks as he rested a hand on her knee but she didn’t pull away. ‘Such a good girl.’

‘Thank you, you’re always so sweet, I love getting to talk to you Mr.Mikaelson.’

‘Ah ah ah. What have I told you about that? You call me by my first name now that we’re friends. You wouldn’t want me to be…disappointed in you would you?’ He questioned, moving his hand up to hold her thigh and seeing his fingers only about 2 inches from touching her panties making her breath just a bit heavier.

‘No! I’m sorry, I just, it’s weird to call a teacher by his name is all-‘

‘But we’re friends. After all this time I thought we were…more than friends even?’ Her eyes widened and she held the sleeve of his red Henley tightly.

‘Of course we are! We’re best friends! I’m sorry Klaus, you know I love spending time with you.’ He couldn’t help his smile at her nearly idiotic level of innocence as she thought he meant ‘best friends’ even as he has his hand almost under her skirt.

‘It’s okay. I love being your best friend, you’re my precious little Bunny. I could never really be disappointed in you love.’ His hand squeezed her flesh and she gasped quietly just before he caught a heavenly scent coming from her making his fangs ache in desperate need of being buried in her throat. In the 2 months he had known her, he had never smelled that sweet slick between her legs until now and he could see as she pushed them together that she didn’t quite understand what the feeling in her stomach was. He would have to teach her everything…he couldn’t find it in himself to be upset about that.

For the next month he got her accustomed to him touching her, arms, legs, back, face, his hands anywhere on her body wasn’t something she minded, not even when he hugged her from behind and rested his hands on her lower belly. That’s when he knew, when she leaned back into him and pushed her thighs together, he knew he could have her.

The next time they were alone together he made sure they had plenty of time. Y/n was scheduled to stay at home that weekend but Klaus made sure something came up with her parents so she couldn’t go. When she spoke to him, he convinced her to not tell the school and just spend the weekend at his place. It would be fun. She was so excited by the idea of spending time with her friend outside of school that she barely worried about the broken rules, getting off at the first bus stop after leaving the school and hopping into his car with a huge smile on her face.

Klaus had gotten all kinds of snacks and drinks, ordering takeout and relaxing with her eating everything she’s not normally allowed to. He had also gone to the store and gotten her clothes, both pajamas and day clothes to wear if she wanted to go someplace tomorrow or Sunday, all of which were short or revealing and he had her change into black short shorts and a tank top with a wolf on it. Last but not least he put on an R rated movie. She argued but didn’t put up too much of a fight about it. It was a horror movie and she was shocked by the cursing and the drugs, but she enjoyed the stupidity of the characters and how they died.

It wasn’t until they got to the reason Klaus chose this movie that she seemed uncomfortable. She watched as the teenage boy pulled his girlfriend onto his lap and ripped her top off, her tits flashing on the screen before he seemed to make a meal out of them.

Klaus had ensured that Y/n was pressed against his side firmly with his arm around her waist so that he wouldn’t need to pull her closer when the scene came on.

As the boy continued kissing down her body he flipped the girl over and ripped off her panties, shoving his face into her. Y/n gasped, completely stunned by this action and looking up at Klaus in shock. ‘What are they doing?’ She questioned and he looked down at her, trying to stay neutral.

‘They’re having sex love, being normal teenagers. You…you know what sex is…don’t you?’

‘Of course I do, I…it’s to make babies…my mom said I didn’t need to know until…until I was ready to get married. They’re sinning.’ Klaus chuckled at that and Y/n looked back up at him confused before turning back to the television and watching as the boy began thrusting into the girl roughly and she began crying out in pleasure.

‘All teenagers have sex Y/n, it’s more strange not to have done it. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t support mindless sex with a bunch of people you don’t know but if you love someone, really care for them then you should express that with them. You don’t have to make a baby, there’s ways to avoid it if you want to but sex is called ‘making love’ for a reason, it’s the best way to express your care for that special someone.’ She looked confused but he could also smell her excitement. ‘They love each other, so they’re making each other feel good. It’s normal and I’m so sorry you’ve been deprived of basic knowledge…do you see her face?’ He asked, knowing exactly how he was going to convince her to let him touch her. ‘What does her face look like?’

‘Happy…really happy.’

‘Right, and the sounds she’s making? Tell me, what do her sounds make you feel?’ Her face was redder than he had ever seen and she looked away from the TV quickly before he tilted her head up. ‘It’s okay Y/n, I love you. You can tell me how you’re feeling. I would never betray your trust and tell anyone anything. You can be honest with me…do you want me to tell you first?’ She nodded quickly and he tried desperately to hide his smile. ‘Well, when I hear her moaning like that I…honestly it makes me desperate to know what you would sound like if you felt good.’ Y/n was now turned toward his body and holding his Henley tightly, clearly trying to calm her breathing as she got too excited. ‘What are you feeling right now? I won’t make fun of you, I want to help.’

‘I…I feel tingly in…in bad places Klaus…sometimes when-Oh God-‘

‘It’s okay. You’re doing so good Bunny, so, so good for me.’ He pulled her onto his lap gently and ran his hands up her sides.

‘When you…t-touch me I get…I feel hot…and tingly…and I get…I-I get-‘

‘Does your pussy get wet for me Bunny?’ She groaned out, in embarrassment and relief both but he didn’t care as he gripped onto her thigh tightly. ‘It’s normal. It means you love me a whole lot, just like I love you.’ Her whimper was quiet but instant.

‘You do?’ He nodded. ‘Do…do you get wet too?’

How stupid is her fucking mother that she could teach her daughter basic-fuck that women!

‘No Bunny, but my cock gets hard for you whenever you touch me, or I think about you, sometimes at night I touch myself and just think about how precious and beautiful you are and it makes my cock feel so much better. When a man’s cock gets too hard it hurts and you are always the one who makes the pain stop, you make me feel so good Precious.’

‘Are you in pain now Klaus?’ She wondered and this was exactly how he knew he would get her to let him do anything he fucking wanted.

‘Yes Bunny, I’ve been in pain since the movie started.’ She looked up at him in shock and worry making him wince a bit as he moved to prove his discomfort.

‘How do you make it stop hurting, I can-I can leave you alone if you need-‘

‘Don’t leave me Bunny, no! Please? I need to hold you Y/n, don’t go-‘

‘Okay. I’m not going anywhere.’ She reached up, running her fingers through his hair and it sent a shiver down his spine.

‘Have you ever seen a cock before?’ He asked her and she shook her head, probably thankful she couldn’t get redder than she is. ‘Do…do you want to?’ She hesitated before looking back up at him and nodding, trying to look determined which made her all the more adorable. He moved slowly so she didn’t get scared, it had been probably about 200 years since he had fucked a virgin and he knew he needed to be even slower with Y/n. He pushed his sweat pants down along with his boxer briefs, his cock standing straight and hard, leaking at the tip, and completely red which seemed to make her believe he was in serious pain.

As if Y/n couldn’t control herself she reached her hand out and touched his tip, dragging her finger down his length before yanking her hand away when he groaned. ‘I’m Sorry! I didn’t mean to hurt you! I-‘

‘No Bunny, no! You made me feel so good, so fucking good! Please just…oh God, please touch me? Please Bunny, help me?’ His desperate cries of pain were too much for her and she reached out, wrapping her hand around his cock, watching him throw his head back as his hand tightened on her thigh. She pumped her hand up and down his length a few times before her eyes found his tip which was leaking. She swiped her thumb across it and his hips thrust up, nearly throwing her off of his lap. ‘My good girl, so good for me! Such a good little Bunny for your Daddy! Don’t stop? Please?!’ He held her hand and helped her speed up for a few moments before looking back down at her and his eyes flashing to her lips. ‘Y/n…will you do something else for me?’

She nodded quickly. ‘Anything Daddy.’

Fuck! He could have cum right there and been completely happy with it but he pushed it back. ‘Please? Daddy needs your lips.’

‘My-my lips?’

He nodded. ‘Please? Just the tip if you want, suck on it like I gave you a lollipop…can you do that Precious?’ She looked back down at his cock before smiling and nodding her head, moving from his lap and kneeling. He could see the excitement in her eyes and he knew right away he was creating a desperate whore. He was going to ruin this girl and he couldn’t care any fucking less, she would belong to no one but him for the rest of eternity and he would never let anyone else touch her perfect body so…how wrong is it really?

She wrapped her lips around his tip and suckled, tongue running over his slit which made his legs stiffen and shake as she did it again, dragging her lips down his length and moaning. That was the final straw for him. He had imagined her mouth and her noises so many times and nothing came close to this, she was perfection and she was never getting away from him. He held the back of her head still as he came up into her mouth and though she jerked a bit at first she got used to it and quickly swallowed, sucking on his cock for more. ‘Did I make you feel better?’ He couldn’t speak, only nod in that moment of total bliss, head thrown back against the couch to keep her from seeing the dark veins under his golden eyes until he could get his hybrid visage under control again, Fuck this girl does things to him! ‘Can I have more cream Daddy?’

‘Oh Fuck!’ Her innocent eyes and words were going to push him over the edge much too quickly. ‘Daddy…Daddy wants to give you more cream. I’ll give you Daddy cream all you want Babygirl but…do you think Daddy can put it somewhere else?’ She tilted her head, looking up at him from her knees. ‘Do you trust me?’ Y/n nodded her head quickly and he smirked, knowing this would be easier than he thought. ‘Can I show you?’

‘Yes Daddy.’ God he’s going to stretch her pussy so much this weekend there will be a permanent indentation of his cock. He lifted her up and laid her onto the couch, throwing his shirt away and grabbing ahold of hers, pulling it off and quickly keeping her arms from covering her perfect tits. They were just the perfect size for his hands and so fucking cute that he couldn’t resist leaning down and wrapping his lips around a nipple, her hips flying up when his teeth nibbled. He took full advantage, dragging his hands down her sides and holding onto her shorts and panties, nibbling again and pulling the clothes down and off as her hips thrust up again. ‘Daddy!’

‘Shh…it’s okay Y/n, it’s just Daddy. I love you Bunny, and I want to spend the rest of eternity at your side making your pussy drip for me, do…do you want me?’ He asked, seeming nervous so that she feels needier for him.

‘Yes Daddy, forever but…you’re my teacher, how-‘

‘You let me worry about that, Daddy will make it all okay…just let Daddy…let Daddy inside of you.’ He groaned, pushing her legs apart and squeezing her thighs with an image of his girl round with his baby burned into his brain, silently begging whatever Gods exist if any to allow him to be able to put a baby in his Little Bunny. Leaning his face down into her wetness he licked his tongue up her slit, lapping at her like a thirsty animal before caressing her clit with the tip of his tongue.

‘Oh Daddy! Don’t Stop! Please?!’ He didn’t, he shoved his face into her cunt and ate her like his life depends on it. He wrapped his hand around hers as he wiggled his tongue against her clit and felt her legs lock around his head as she reached her peak for the first time ever, crying out so loud he knew the neighbors would hear if he’d had any. When he pulled away he crawled back up her chest and kissed her neck, lining his cock up at her hole and pushing his way into her before she had time to have doubts, still on cloud nine as he pushed the last 2 inches in a short thrust and she squealed.

‘That’s it Bunny, oh god you’re so perfect. So fucking perfect! So tight on my-‘

‘Daddy! Y-You’re in-inside…you can’t-‘

‘Clearly I can. And I am.’ He turned her face to look up at him and made sure she was looking him in the eyes. ‘My cock is in your pussy right now, so deep you can practically feel me in your guts, can’t you?’ She nodded, whining. ‘This is my pussy now, all mine. No one can ever take you away from me…you have the most perfect cunt I’ve ever seen baby.’ He pulled back a few inches before pushing in again and pressing his lips to her lips for the first time. ‘Tell me Bunny, what was it you wanted from Daddy?’

‘Daa-ah!’ He thrust up again when she didn’t answer and he smirked, feeling his fangs trying to push out of his gums as he became more and more desperate to mark her.

‘Tell me what you wanted.’

‘D-Daddy cream…wanted m-more Daddy cream…please Daddy? Can I have more?’ She was begging now, whining in desperation for his cum in her womb.

‘Daddy will always give you cream. Daddy’s gonna fill you with so much you’ll be leaking for days. We’re going to fill you with cream for the next 2 days and maybe I’ll keep you even longer just to make sure it’s all properly fucked into you.’

‘Yes! Daddy cream! Want you inside me Daddy, inside me forever! Your cock feels so good! Why did no one tell me it feels so good! Can you stay inside me forever? Daddy, please?’

‘Oh Bunny…Daddy’s gonna breed this little body so much, gonna fill you with my cum over and over again until you’re a leaking, fucked out mess, until all you can do is whine and babble my fucking name! Until all you can say is ‘please Daddy more?’ And I’ll fill you over and over until it takes and you’re carrying my baby inside of your gorgeous body.’ Her eyes widened as she looked up at him, his hips thrusting harder as she realized what he meant, what he was really doing. ‘That’s right Bunny, you’re gonna give Daddy babies, gonna fill you with my babies over and over and still you’ll be desperate for more. Cause you know what bunnies do? They breed, they breed like crazy, they get Fucked-‘ he thrust hard getting deeper into her, now holding her legs up and getting as deep as he physically can. ‘-until they can’t anymore and then they do it again cause they’re so needy and desperate and slutty that they can’t stop. You have a slutty little pussy Bunny, are you ready for Daddy to fill it?’

He knew he wouldn’t stop even if she said ‘no’ but he wanted her to want it, because she is his for the rest of eternity. ‘P-please? Daddy cream! Fill my pussy Daddy! Please?!’

‘That’s my good girl. Daddy’s good girl, gonna be so full of me! Fuck!’ He shoved his cock into her as deeply as he could, feeling her pussy squeezing him through her own orgasm and practically milking his cock for all he could give her and Klaus had never felt so blissful, not in 1000 years.

He kept himself buried inside of her cunt, holding her close and pulling a blanket over the both of them, nuzzling into her throat to find some comfort before drifting off to sleep with the TV sound in the background.

Sometime in the night Klaus had moved them upstairs to his bed and cleaned the both of them up. Later that morning he was awoken by the girl in his arms moving, opening his eyes to see her sitting up and keeping the sheet wrapped around her body.

‘I saw it all last night gorgeous, might as well leave the sheet.’ She turned her head to look down at him and as soon as he saw the tears in her eyes he was moving. ‘Oh no, Bunny! No tears, why are you crying?’ To his relief she didn’t fight him, crying into his bare chest as he held her.

‘What am I going to do?!’ She cried, wrapping her arms around his neck and sniffling.

‘What do you mean? You’re going to stay right here, with me. I love you Y/n, and all you and I did last night was show our love for each other, there’s nothing wrong with that-‘

‘Unless I’m Pregnant! My Mom Is Going To Kill Me! I’m a disappointment to God and my father-Oh God My Father! He’s gonna kill me-‘ Klaus clamped his hand over Y/n’s mouth to stop her sobbing.

‘No one is Ever going to hurt you, and do you know why?’ She shook her head, tears streaming down her sweet face which he reached to wipe away. ‘Because you’re my Little Bunny. All mine. You asked last night why you weren’t told how good you could feel, remember?’ She nodded. ‘You weren’t told so that they could control you. You’re almost an adult and no one told you about anything, that’s wrong and cruel and dangerous! You gave yourself to me last night and I am going to spend the rest of our lives worshipping my girl like a Princess…you still love me…don’t you?’

‘Yes! Of course I do Klaus! I love you so much but my father will never let me be with you! He doesn’t care what I want, he will choose my husband once I graduate-‘

‘Y/n, you’ve already chosen. You’re 18, an adult, able to make your own choices. No one can tell you what to do anymore unless you want them to…we can go. Go back to the school, pack your things, I’ll quit my job and we can be together.’ Klaus knew when he looked at her curious eyes that he had her, he was going to make this happen and the best part is Y/n will think she made her own decision for the first time ever.

‘But what about your job? We’ll go live together with no income? I won’t have a diploma so I can’t get a job to-‘

‘You will never have a job!’ Klaus swore and she looked startled. ‘I have plenty of money, I’m an artist, I sell my work all the time. I worked in that school because…because I fell in love with you. I know it’s crazy, of course it is but I couldn’t leave you Y/n! You were already my everything…please tell me you’ll come with me? I can give you everything you��ve ever wanted! A wonderful house on acres and acres of woods and privacy, no one to bother us…except maybe my siblings on occasion but they’ll love you! Your parents won’t be able to control you anymore. You can wear what you want, anything you want, eat what you want, read, write, study, learn whatever you want! I’ll give you jewelry and silk sheets, a maid, the library you always talk about wanting, I can-‘

‘I just want you…’ Klaus’ eyes widened at her soft words. ‘I don’t need all that fancy stuff if I have you…don’t get me wrong, it sounds wonderful but can…can you promise me you’ll never leave me? That it will always be us for the rest of forever?’

He smirked at that, knowing instantly that the deal was sealed, Y/n is all his. ‘Forever and a day my precious girl. I love you so much, and we’re going to be so happy together.’ Y/n grinned, grabbing the back of his neck and pulling his lips to hers in a wonderful, needy kiss. ‘I’m going to make you scream in pleasure every night until you can’t remember your own name anymore, Bunny.’

She pulled back from his lips, peeking up at him with a shy look. ‘Daddy’s gonna give me babies?’

And just like that his cock was so hard he felt like a teenager again, desperately horny with an erection that won’t quit. Y/n is going to be full of him there’s no way she won’t end up carrying his child and he already has plans to speak to a witch about ensuring it. ‘Daddy’s going to fill you with babies everyday, every single day until it takes. Gonna keep you so full you won’t know what it’s like to be empty anymore…in fact, we should fill you up before we go get your things, shouldn’t we?’ Y/n squealed as Klaus lifted her, sitting her onto his lap and holding her up with one arm around her waist as he lined his cock up with her dripping hole. ‘Already soaking wet for Daddy, my needy little whore. So perfect-‘ She gasped loudly, looking down at him in desperation.

‘Not a whore Daddy! I’m not! I would never-‘

‘No, Shh, Shh, Shh. It’s okay Princess, My whore. Daddy’s whore, My girl who will do all the wonderful, depraved things Daddy wants you to. Do you understand? Not A whore, My whore. Any other cock comes anywhere near you I’ll cut it off and stick it up their ass.’ He pushed his cock up into her and she whined, still a bit sore from last night but feeling too good to care.

They ended up staying in bed for another 4 hours, Klaus filling his girl 3 more times before taking a nap together. Getting to the school and compelling the Dean was arguably too easy and they were long gone before Y/n’s parents ever came looking for her. It’s not like they would want her back with how badly Klaus had corrupted her.

Their little girl was gone.

She’s Klaus’ Little Bunny now.

Klaus Mikaelson Masterlist

#vampire #hybrid #tvd klaus #the vampire diaries #the originals #the vampire diares imagine #the originals imagine #niklaus mikaelson #niklaus imagine #klaus imagine #klaus x reader #klaus x y/n #klaus fic #klaus fluff #klaus mikaelson #klaus mikaelson one shot #klaus mikaelson x reader #klaus mikaelson fluff #klaus mikaelson smut #yandere klaus mikaelson #klaus mikaelson x oc #klaus mikaelson fanfiction #klaus mikaelson x y/n #klaus mikaelson imagine #Yandere!klaus #art teacher!Klaus #joseph morgan

[pshcomforts]

➳ double take | psh.

non!idolsunghoon x fem!reader (feat. haechan from nct and ningning from aespa)

“i don’t see nobody but you”

synopsis: you never noticed sunghoon until your friend and your crush started going out.

warnings/content: written in third pov. fluff! slight angst(?) love my girl, ningning but she’s not the best in here. kind of idiots in love. friends to lovers (as always). high school au but major time skip! mentions of alcohol, pregnancy, and marriage. not proofread and cursing!

comments, likes, and reposts are appreciated :)

word count: 4.4k

a/n: fictional characters — dae (jungwon’s boyfriend), min-su (heeseung’s girlfriend), and ji-woo (jake’s girlfriend). this is essentially let you break my heart again but if hoon was in jay’s spot.. :)

༘˚⋆𐙚｡masterlist⋆.✧˚

current song playing: double take by dhruv

↻ ◁ II ▷ ↺

0:39 ─────|────────────── -2:12

“you think you can tell him for me?” y/n pleaded.

“y/n..” her friend, ningning frowned.

“please, ningning!! i need to know! the mixed signals are driving me crazy.”

ningning let out an exasperated sigh. “fine, just for you y/n.” the girl let out a victorious yelp, patting her friend up to go towards the boy she liked.

y/n intently watched her walk to him with hopeful eyes.

“hey y/n,” dae greeted her with a grin.

“hey dae” — she responded, not even meeting eyes with him as she stayed glued to the two people in front of her.

“what’s ningning doing over there??” ji-woo chimed in as she sat next to dae.

their other friend came into the sight as well. “uh.. is ningning talking to haechan???” min-su harshly said with blinking eyes.

“SH!” y/n shushed. “she’s talking to him for me!”

“as if he’d ever like you,” sunghoon randomly intervened.

y/n’s head whipped to the tall boy, shooting an annoyed look towards him and the three boys behind him. “shut the hell up, you weren’t included in this conversation for a reason.”

he let out a ridiculed scoff before sitting beside her. the rest of the boys went to their significant others, lovingly taking them in their embrace.

her eyes went back to ningning and haechan, only to find her rushing back.

“so..??” y/n questioned. ningning bit her lip with sorry eyes. “uhm y/n, we should talk one to one..”

y/n’s brows furrowed, still going along with her request — leaving the rest of the group confused.

“what’s wrong?”

“so i told him.. but uhm, he actually admitted to liking me instead..”

it was then that y/n felt her heart drop and shatter. “o-oh…” she swallowed a harsh gulp, feeling tears spark at the rim of her eyes.

ningning’s words were filled with guilt as she struggled to look at her. “i’m so sorry y/n…,” her arms immediately flung into her comfort.

holding back the threatening tears, y/n softly pulled away from the hug after a few seconds. “thank you ningning, but it’s okay. i won’t stop you if you want to go out with him.” she comforted with a heartbreak.

“y/n i would never-“

“it’s okay. i’ll get over it, it’s just a small crush anyway.” she said with a reassuring smile.

ningning’s eyes softened. “thank you y/n, you’re the absolute best.” she gave her another quick hug before drifting off to her new found boyfriend, haechan.

watching her friend run to him was already such a difficult task to endure. to see how she automatically ran to him after getting a “blessing” was something that bubbled her insides.

y/n bit her lip to stop the tears nearing its fall while dragging her feet back to the table where her friends stood.

“so.. how’d it go??” dae enthusiastically asked.

her breath trembled as soon as the words had processed. “uhm..” she took a pause, feeling like there was a lump in her throat — “he likes ningning.”

the words stunned everyone, sunghoon especially.

“w..what??” ji-woo yelled.

y/n let out an awkward laugh, averting the rage-filled friend who was trying to be calmed down by her boyfriend. “it’s fine, really! i even told ningning to go for it so..!”

min-su rolled her eyes at her dumb-founded friend. “you fucking bitch. no… that fucking bitch!” she took a stand before being pulled back down by her boyfriend, heeseung. “calm down baby!” he yelled.

“NO! she’s right!!” dae and ji-woo retorted at the same time.

y/n couldn’t help but cackle at her stupid friend’s reactions. “you guys are so silly.. it’s really okay though! i’ll get over it.” she said while patting them.

her eyes turned to look at sunghoon who had stayed quiet. the other boys gave a little of their input because of their partners, but hoon? he never said a word.

he just looked scarily tense. not moving a single muscle in his body to show a reaction was scaring y/n.

“you okay bro?” jake asked after taking notice of his statued body as well. “you look like you’ve seen a ghost.”

jungwon and heeseung laughed along. “just fine,” he uttered through gritted teeth.

the girls and dae looked at each other, wondering in unison of why he was reacting the way he was. well if it wasn’t so obvious to everyone else, sunghoon had liked y/n.

well, perhaps everyone knew through their partners.

it was such an easy observation to be made. of course y/n never realized it. she was far too lost in the deepest thoughts of haechan. so when y/n looked at her friends, they also shared the same look even if they knew the reason why.

she shook it off though, everyone did.

as lunch came to an end, y/n packed her things and left to class with her friends. reluctantly, they all had the same classroom together to enjoy the school year.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

long months had passed by now, and seeing haechan and ningning be a couple in front of her was not as easy as she believed it to be.

though sustaining little things they’d do as a couple was getting to be tolerable.

in fact, as she adapted to just ignoring anything related to the two, she actually began to grow closer to sunghoon. with all of her friends in annoying relationships, she found comfort in the only other friend who was still single like her.

it was like they went on couple dates with their group of friends because of how they were the only ones left. she didn’t know when or how, but she slowly started to fall in love with him without even realizing it. they just matched each other’s compatibility. everyone saw it.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

“y/n, you awake??” ji-woo softly shook the girl.

“what???” y/n groggily said with an irritated tone.

“wake up bitch, we’re gonna drive to the beach!” min-su yelled in one of her ears.

y/n let out a loud groan, attempting to cover herself and dae who remained half asleep and half awake. “just go without me..” she mumbled, words almost not even coherent.

“girl no! get up! we’re going with the boys. sunghoon’s gonna be alone if you don’t go..” ji-woo said with a smug grin.

“ugh just let him be alone, i want to sleep.”

“girl get up!” min-su yelled, trying to wake herself up by rubbing her eyes.

y/n groaned again. “i fucking hate you guys..”

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

after leaving at the crack of dawn, everyone found themselves comfortably situated in the huge car that carried them all (a second car holding the others).

heeseung drove while min-su stayed as his passenger princess. jungwon and dae were in the back with earphones in each side of the opposite ear. jake and ji-woo remained in the back of them, arms linked up as the girl laid her head on his shoulder while his rested on top of hers — both asleep.

as for sunghoon and y/n.. well unfortunately, they couldn’t fit in that car so they had to ride in jay’s car, in which contained ningning and haechan.

as much as they wanted to be in the other car, they settled to be with jay who was suffering just as much as they were. jay drove of course, with niki as his passenger princess. ningning and haechan were in the back of them, and y/n and sunghoon were in the complete back with sunoo.

y/n yawned, softly frowning at the fact that she couldn’t even be in the same car as her closest friends. “you tired?” hoon asked with a low voice.

her head turned to him, blinking softly as her drowsy mind barely processed what he said. “hm? oh.. yeah kind of…,” she yawned again.

he lightly chuckled before handing her his airpod. “take this, you might need it after hearing the couple in front of us talk.”

y/n smiled at his words, rolling her eyes but taking the offer anyway. “gosh hoon… same song again?” she beamed while being alarmingly close to him.

sunghoon gulped, hoping she didn’t see through his nervous manner. “uhm.. yeah, of course.” he averted her gaze to start the music — ‘21’ by gracie abrahams.

within seconds of the song playing, y/n instantly felt relieved. the suffocating thought of her friend with her crush she was still trying to get over was gone after being in sunghoon’s comfort.

“i love this song..” she quietly uttered, expecting him to not even hear it.

“me too,” he replied back.

y/n closed her eyes, drifting off to sleep after feeling her heart gently thump at his small response.

throughout the ride, in some shifting way, her head drooped down as she attempted to find something cozy to lay her head on. suddenly, she found her head to be laying on sunghoon’s shoulder. she knew she probably shouldn’t have because that’s a little awkward, but the girl was tired! she’d apologize later but right now, she wanted some comfortable sleep.

as she laid her head, the 5’11 boy dumbly smiled to himself. he couldn’t even contain the wide grin that was plastered across his face. he was so happy that sunoo had to silently judge him with a soft scoff.

“they’re next, i swear.” the boy mumbled to himself while going back to his phone.

hoon heard it, but couldn’t even give a remark back because just those words had his heart almost jumping out of his chest. the mere thought of them becoming something more set fireworks.

eventually though, he fell asleep as well — unknowingly laying his head on top of hers. the two became sound asleep, letting sunoo take a peek and softly scoff again.

“i have to take a picture,” he mischievously said with a smile. a snap of a photo was taken and sent to min-su with a caption — ‘they’re in love! and you guys can’t even see it happen!! ㅋㅋㅋ’

in the other car, loud gasps were made. “GUYS! sunghoon and y/n! sunghoon and y/n!” min-su yelled, shoving her phone to dae who eventually passed it on to ji-woo.

“OH MY GOD!” the two said in unison.

“they should’ve been in this car!!” ji-woo exclaimed with a groan. jake chuckled in return, “you know they couldn’t baby.”

“i can’t even see it happen.. i’m literally their biggest supporter!” she yelled again, causing another laugh to be spurted out of her boyfriend.

“aww they look so cute,” dae commented while showing jungwon the picture. “don’t they, wonie??”

“they most definitely do!” the dimpled boy responded.

after getting her phone back, min-su tapped her boyfriend’s hands. “baby look! it’s disgusting but something’s finally happening!” she yelled to him. heeseung took a quick glance after stopping at a red light. a smile curled onto his lips as he said, “my boy’s finally doing something other than watch from afar.”

“just focus on the road, hee.” she retorted after slightly judging his words.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

soon enough, the drivers made it to the beach. those who had fallen asleep had woken up in a slight daze.

when y/n had awoken, her eyes scanned around. “morning lovebirds, you guys finally waking up?” jay beamed with a wide grin.

her face scrunched up in confusion. “lovebirds?” she hoarsely repeated with a cough.

the male laughed at her reaction. “guess you guys just had to hold hands while falling asleep huh?” he asked with a downturn smile in disgust.

sunghoon blinked in confusion, face scrunching just like hers. their heads lifted at the same time, eyes scanning for an answer to his word choice. in seconds, they both looked down and found their hands interlocked with each others.

quickly, hoon discarded his off of hers. “oh uhm sorry,” he awkwardly uttered.

“it’s.. okay…,” y/n responded back, looking the other way in embarrassment.

“you know, that’s cute and all, but please get out for what we came here for.” niki snorted.

sunghoon rushed out of the car, letting y/n be the last to get out.

“such a gentleman..,” jay softly remarked with a head shake.

the 5’11 boy shot him a glare before looking at her to see if she noticed what he had said. she didn’t though, she was still trying to wake up with a long stretch.

“you really fell asleep huh?” haechan asked the girl.

y/n paused for a second. “oh yeah.. ha ha… i was really tired.” she didn’t like him as much anymore but that didn’t mean she still wasn’t awkward around him. “weren’t you tired?”

“oh yeah, i definitely was.” he responded with a half smile.

her heart still softly lit up at his cute grin. she knew he was with someone else, but the side of her still liking him was peeking through just a little.

sunghoon rolled his eyes at the sight, giving a light ‘tsk’ at watching how awkward and nervous she was becoming. his tongue poked out of his cheek and his jaw clenched, feeling an overprotective urge to drag her away.

“lighten up, would you? you look creepy just staring.” jake said with a laugh and a hit to the shoulder.

“thought you were still next to your girlfriend? surprised she’s not even here, you guys are basically glued to the hip.” hoon smiled after what he said.

“okay calm down, just because i have a loving girlfriend and you don’t. just don’t be too creepy.”

with that, jake walked away to find ji-woo. the jealous male remained to watch closely at how haechan and y/n interacted. it seemed obvious that she kept a distance, but just a light laugh about a joke he told was already setting him off.

as he was about to approach the two, he saw ningning go to them first. she dragged haechan away, leaving y/n alone with an obvious sad tone in the background. he let out a sigh at her, watching how her heart still tore from them.

“y/n!! come here!” hoon heard dae yell. the girl went to her friend, giving out another sigh, this one more in defeat as the urge to comfort her had now been stolen by jungwon’s boyfriend.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

long hours passed by. each couple had gone off on their own, leaving the singles out. jay, niki, and sunoo adventured together while sunghoon and y/n walked out on the shore.

it was awkward between them two. holding hands had been the furthest they gotten with their somewhat situationship that wouldn’t be talked about.

“hey hoon?” y/n softly chirped.

“hm?”

they both stopped in their tracks. “i’m sorry if it was awkward that we held hands. you’re my friend, and i don’t want to ruin anything special we have going on here.”

hoon smiled at her words. “you think we have something special going on?” he teased.

she quickly shut her eyes and smacked him. “you know that’s not what i meant!” he chuckled in response, holding his arm as he hit her back.

“would it be bad if we did though?” hoon uttered. his heart raced afterwards, feeling a numbing pain hit his legs as he awaited for a response.

y/n froze though. she didn’t know how to respond to that. “uhm, would it?” she sheepishly asked.

sunghoon chuckled at how shy she got. this is something he always wanted to see after seeing how flustered she’d been with haechan. he looked at her with slightly watered eyes from the wind.

“i don’t think it’d be so bad if we had something going on.” he said, in almost a whisper.

she bit her lip and turned her gaze elsewhere. “geez you’re really confrontational today.”

his lips curled into a smile, bringing his hand to her chin to lift her gaze back onto him. “only when it’s something like this with you.”

damn, he was charming.

y/n’s heart was fluttering, melting, pounding — all of that within seconds of his sappy words.

“i like you, y/n. i like you a lot. i think i’ve always liked you ever since we met. seeing you fawn over someone like haechan wasn’t the best feeling, but i’m honestly glad that we got closer because of him.” hoon confessed.

butterflies hit her stomach as she felt herself starting to breathe heavily. “i.. i like you too hoon. you being there while i was getting over haechan made me realize how well we match. you’ve always been the one.”

sunghoon automatically grinned ear to ear. “i’m the one?” he teased with an eyebrow raise.

“shut up—“ and he did, by kissing her.

his lips smashed against hers, desperation and hunger evident in the kiss as she kissed back. his hands met her cheeks while smiling along her lips.

he pulled away not too long after. “i just did,” he panted to her. she pushed him back with a scream, “hoon!”

as they softly tussled with each other, they soon tired out and watched the sun set together. sand in almost every part of their clothing as they watched with their knees up to their chests, and heads on shoulders.

“you guys ready to go?” ji-woo yelled to the new couple.

sunghoon and y/n stood together, holding hand in hand, causing a gasp to be heard from everyone.

“you guys are finally together??” she yelled out for the whole group to hear.

they both laughed at their friend’s reaction, hearing the rest scream together as they saw for their own eyes.

“awww finally!” dae yelled.

“right. fucking finally!” min-su reiterated with a disgusted look. y/n laughed, smacking her friend’s arm as the boys congratulated hoon.

“finally bro, i’ve been waiting!” jake said, aggressively patting his back.

“never thought it’d come true,” niki retorted with a chuckle.

as the rest congratulated the couple they had been supporting, everyone soon agreed upon leaving to the car and going home.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

years passed by after such an unforgettable memory between them. such long time had gone by that the group went through high school and college together. everyone had went in their late 20’s, living their own life while still being in touch time to time.

and after years of being together, sunghoon had finally proposed to the girl he’s always loved.

as time began to near their wedding date, y/n and him decided to bring the group back together as it was what they always did when someone got married.

first it was min-su and heeseung, then it was ji-woo and jake, then dae and jungwon. y/n always found it a little crazy in how much each couple still made their relationship work even after high school.

haechan and ningning, on the other hand, were something else. they still remained together, but the energy was always off between them. it was as if there was no spark.

when everyone had finally gathered for the hangout at a korean barbecue restaurant, drinks and celebrations were held in the air for the soon-to-be wedded couple.

hoon had his arm around y/n, letting his hand interlock with the one closest to him.

“congratulations to the finally engaged couple!” ji-woo yelled, raising her glass in cheers.

everyone complied and raised theirs as well, everyone except min-su.

“aww thank you guys! we should also be celebrating for someone else too!!” y/n exclaimed, gesturing to the pregnant girl. “another kid on the way.. that’s a little crazy.”

min-su laughed alongside her husband, heeseung who was rubbing her tummy. “just a few months along,” he whispered in a slightly drunken voice.

everyone was a little driven by alcohol (except min-su), and as hours passed, the group had continued to have the hard liquor in their system.

ningning giggled with her infamous shrieking laugh. “hey y/n, wanna know something funny?” she asked with a hiccup.

y/n nodded to her, laying her head on sunghoon’s chest afterward.

she giggled again, being close to haechan as she said, “i guess you can say i played cupid..,”

y/n laughed with her brows knitted together in confusion. “what do you mean by that?”

“well actually..,” she downed another shot, “that one day in high school when you told me to go confess to haechan, i actually lied to him and you!”

everyone quieted down after hearing her, haechan especially.

“yeah! i told you he didn’t like you when he actually did, and so i went out with him because i liked him!” her words were slurred, showing that she was obviously drunk.

“you WHAT?” haechan loudly boomed. “you didn’t tell her i liked her??”

ningning laughed again, feeling like everything was just silly and in the moment. “nope! but isn’t it great? we ended up together, and now they’re getting married!”

y/n repeatedly blinked. she was more in disbelief of how her friend had done a backstabbing thing, more so to her old crush actually liking her back. everyone else kept their mouth shut, all a little too shocked to honestly say anything.

“you’re telling me i could’ve had a life with the girl i loved instead? you robbed me of what i could’ve had??” he angrily spat, causing random heads to turn at him.

“w..what?” she said with a gulp, feeling a little scared of his next words.

haechan scoffed. “i’ve been thinking of a way to break up with you, but i felt like i couldn’t because of how long we’ve been together. but this? this is a great way to end this relationship. sunghoon and y/n? i’m sorry for ruining the night, but have a great life together, you deserve it. and y/n, i’m sorry that you never got to know the truth.”

y/n pressed her lips into a firm line, uncomfortably looking down while muttering, “it’s okay.”

and it was then that he walked out. haechan left, and ningning scrambled after him in pleading cries.

the rest of the group sat in silence. the only thing heard were sizzling meats on the grill and talks of other customers.

“so um…,” dae softly said, clearing his throat after breaking the awkward ice. “that was..,”

“crazy? yeah.” min-su replied while rubbing heeseung’s hand.

“uhm should we go after ningning?” y/n worriedly asked, eyes searching for the girl.

“she’ll be okay, haechan still got in the car with her.” said jay, who was holding tightly onto his wife.

“i don’t even know what to say…,” y/n said, eyes looking at sunghoon who remained quiet on his side. “you okay?” she mumbled only for him to hear.

he snapped out of his daze, turning to her and just nodding before going back into disassociation.

instantly, she knew he wasn’t. it clearly bothered him and she wanted to say something about it, just not in front of everyone.

her hand grasped his, softly rubbing it in a gentle way to assure him. he held onto hers as well, a little tightly at that. holding on like he was gonna lose her.

.　 . • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆

one by one, each couple left. hoon and y/n being the second to leave.

the car ride was quiet and she knew why. his hand held onto hers still, soft gentle strokes coming from his thumb as he overthought everything.

when they reached their house, they both instantly went to their bedroom. y/n took off her comforting jacket while hoon swept off his coat.

“tonight was a little tense, wasn’t it?” she tried to softly joke. there was no response though. “hoonie?” she called out.

silence filled the air for a few seconds before he spoke, “so would you have been with haechan instead if he actually knew?”

“what?” a slight scoff had left her mouth, a little in disbelief that he said that.

he didn’t repeat his words or respond back, causing y/n to turn around after getting into her cozy pajamas.

“hoon…,” she softly uttered. his heart thumped at the name call, and all he could do was turn to face her as well.

immediately, her eyes softened at how he looked. his facial expressions tried to scream stern, but his eyes said something else. they were glassy with a sense of doubt.

she got closer to him, cupping his cheeks as she furrowed her brows. “no, think about it y/n.” he pushed the hands away — “you could’ve been with him right now. do you.. still want to be with him?”

y/n sighed, somewhat in disbelief of how he was being. “sunghoon..,” she let him turn to face her again. “look, who knows if he would’ve been the one i’d be with if i knew the truth, but in all honesty, i’m so very glad that ningning never told me.”

his face subtly lit up at her words and she only smiled at that. “i’m so glad we fell in love instead because i can’t even see myself with someone like haechan anymore. maybe when i was a young teenage girl.. but guess what? that young teenage girl still fell in love with you, my soulmate. we’re getting married hoon, i’d never rethink of my life with someone who wasn’t you.”

her arms flung around his neck after watching how reassured he became with her words. hoon’s hands met her waist as their heads softly bunked against each others. “that’s right.. you’re marrying me. i win.” he said, leaning in for a kiss.

their kiss lasted seconds before they both pulled back. “you know, i think this is the nicest you’ve ever been to me.” he said with a grin.

y/n rolled her eyes. “shut up, im nice to you!”

“yeah, like once a week.”

she sent a smack to his arms. “that’s because you make me not want to be nice to you, loser!”

sunghoon laughed, squeezing his eyes shut while showing his fanged smile.

“want me to be nice again?”

“actually?”

y/n nodded. “that day that we confessed to each other at the beach, it made me actually enjoy the beach for the first time since childhood, and you know i’ve never liked the beach.”

his eyes widened and he smiled once more. “really??” and she nodded again.

“it’s been my favorite day ever since then.”

“wow you must really love me!” hoon laughed before planting a kiss on her cheek.

she rolled her eyes, pushing him away as she exclaimed, “oh god hoon! let’s just go to sleep.” the girl murmured back, avoiding his sweet touches that caused constant thuds in her heart.

she pulled her fiancé into bed, turning out the lights and pulling in closely to his chest.

“good night, pretty girl.”

“good night, winner.”

★・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・・★

#pshcomforts #enhypen #park sunghoon #enha imagines #enha x reader #enhypen heeseung #enhypen imagines #enhypen jake #enhypen jay #enha #enhypen x reader #enhypen sunghoon #enhypen sunoo #enhypen scenarios #enhypen niki #enhypen jungwon #enhypen fic #enhypen ff #enhypen fanfiction #enhypen fluff #enhypen angst #enha angst #enha scenarios #enha fluff #park sunghoon fluff #park sunghoon angst #sunghoon #sunghoon fluff #sunghoon fanfic #sunghoon angst

[heart2beom]

a lost bet!

pairing: frenemy!beomgyu x reader

genre: fluff, comedy

summary: you lose a bet to beomgyu and out of everything you'd think he'd ask of you -- money, to pour freezing water on yourself out in the snow, hell, you thought it'd be more likely for him to ask you to jump off a cliff and survive than telling you to take him out on a date.

word count: 2.2k

notes: cheesy stuff but if you read it till the end, a heart is always appreciated :') if you read it and liked it, please reblog ˃̵ᴗ˂̵

there are people who would be described as two peas in a pot, the half of the other, siblings from another mother -- the idea that they complete each other, that they work so well together that they must be of the same thread.

to describe your relationship with beomgyu, those metaphors would never even have came up in the light of day because you guys just don't work. you like what he likes and he likes what you like. you do what he does, and he does what you do. for heavensake, you've known each other since highschool and you still ended up in the same dream university, in the same dream careers, in the same fast food job! and that is exactly why you don't work. the arguments that fester from being just a little too similar got extreme back when you were teenagers, terribly extreme you couldn't even blame it on hormones.

girls who'd be interested in beomgyu every three weeks would come up to you at the randomest times to ask if there was anything going on between you two and the first couple girls, your friends would die of laughter because of how inaccurate the assumption was. "her and beomgyu? beomgyu with the long hair? him and y/n? the y/n that's standing next to us right now?"

it was safe to say that after a while, the entire engineering major knew you and beomgyu would never happen. and you were content with that.

that is until that day happened, the day you lost the bet.

you were feeling lots of things before he'd decide on a what you'd do - fear, fear was a big one.

"hey, go easy on me." you reluctantly said quietly.

"huh?" he put a hand behind his ear, "what'd you say?"

it was embarrassing enough that you couldn't complete the software in time when you're known in the major for being the fastest, but it was even worse to give beomgyu the satisfaction of you being scared. you already caught a smirk on his face, fucker.

"i said...go easy on me you prick."

"okay okay here, since you're begging, i'll give you a deal." he folded his arms, acting like he was thinking of this on the spot. "i'll go easy on you if you don't ask any questions about my dare." and that was when you knew that he had this planned out - you took the bait anyway, just of the small chance you might avoid jumping off a cliff.

"okay, i accept the deal, whats the dare?"

"take me, choi beomgyu..." he was elongating every vowel and you'd hate to admit it but every time he does it, as annoying as it is, it does manage to do its job and keeps you on your toes to want to know what he'd say next.

but the long pause that day was way more annoying than usual.

"just say it!", you yelled.

"on a date!" he yelled immediately in response. "jesus christ you're so impatient."

beomgyu saw you open your mouth to say something and he anticipated it so he quickly shut you up with a finger on your lips.

"no questions, remember?", you rolled your eyes and snatched his finger off your lip. "here are the rules. one, you're paying for everything-"

"broke ass." you cursed under your breath and he caught it.

"who's working three shifts again?" well, that got you quiet. "two, it has to be the best date i've ever been on. like spectacular, jaw dropping, 5 star restaurant. you know i'm a wanted, highly desirable man. and three, if you break the rules, you'll have to try again. but hey, i trust you'll get it on the first try. i'm going to go easy on you."

and that is how you find yourself on the 9th try of trying to woo beomgyu with a date and finally get the dare over with. i'm going to go easy on you? bullshit.

the first three times, it was aggravating to know that you failed and had to go on another date. the next four to eight times, you viewed it as another assignment to overcome - like a game? that period was ambitious (hello, you literally drove four hours for one of the dates once) so when even those failed, you entered your nine times to how many the fuck you know times. you've never went on this many dates with someone you weren't even in a relationship with.

and by now you'd figured that beomgyu was just freeloading off of you. that asshole. you would totally do something like that..

like it was the devil's calling, beomgyu came through the door of the desserted cafe that you part timed at.

"hey! welcome to bist-- beomgyu." you said his name grimly, staring at him walk over to your register.

"oh my god, i did not know you worked here! fancy seeing you partner!"

"beomgyu, you literally used to work with me-- you know what? no. i just took the last order. we're closing the store."

he looked at his wrist, like he was reading a watch but when he dropped his hand down, there was indeed, no real watch.

"it's seven on a thursday, you aren't fooling me."

you groan dramatically like a child, frustrated. "what do you want beomgyu? i can't afford to hear your voice one more time this week, i'm serious i think i need to get myself checked out before i'm driven to insanity." you mumbled as he looked up at the menu, his iris going left and right trying to decipher which one would be the cheapest, and not taste like total shit. "can i get a...hmm...this is a lot of options..."

"a triple shot soy decaf vanilla latte with whipped cream?", you filled in.

"no not--wait, hold on. that sounds really good."

"because it is good." you said rolling your eyes playfully, this time.

"is it cheap?"

"the cheapest." you said, cracking a smirk. it was times like these where you remember that you and beomgyu are still the friends part of the frenemy title you both chose to adopt.

a more genuine fond smile warmed up on beomgyu's face, because he had the same exact thought.

"well its not technically the cheapest--" he started.

"don't ruin the moment beomgyu." you said heading to the backroom.

"i'm just saying, you were being deceitful! also there was no moment!" you heard beomgyu call out. secretly, you let out a quick chuckle to that.

when you finally got him his order, you expected him to leave...but of course, you thought too highly of him. because there he was, elbows on the counter, sipping his coffee (milkshake) really..really loudly. it was like his sole purpose was to annoy the fuck out of you.

"do you want me to direct you to a table mr. choi?" you said in your fake nice voice sarcastically as your back was turned from him to wash the tools that you used.

"y/n i have a question."

"answer mines first."

"when is the next date--i mean, like, your next, um..attempt? try? what are we calling it?"

you exhale, you knew he was going to mention it.

"it's today. surprise!" you turned around with a terrifying toothy smile, doing jazz hands.

"you just decided this last minute didn't you?" you shook your head, still keeping up a smile. "also stop smiling like that oh my god."

and the smile was dropped. "okay, so what if i decided just now? you know, the cheapest dates are the best dates."

"literally nobody has ever said that." he said, taking another sip of his drink, shaking his head slowly disapprovingly.

"no, yeah you're right i don't know why i just did." you said, very much perplexed those words came out of your mouth -- you'll call it your first stage of insanity.

"look, i'm going to be completely honest, i don't think you'll ever top the paris hot balloon date with that cute foreign chick."

you scoffed, coming closer to the counter with your arms crossed. "um pfft, i thought we collectively, we as in the whole world by the way, agreed that you made that date up."

"you're the only one who thinks it didn't happen, i literally showed you pictures! and it's not that hard to believe, i am universally hot stuff." he shrugged, and you rolled your eyes. "wait hey, i think i still have the pictures, let me show you."

his eyes were narrowed, scrolling on his phone.

"okay okay, enough. also don't call yourself hot stuff again." you covered his phone screen and he looks up at you confused. "lets say it did happen.."

"it did happen!"

"...if you knew i wasn't going to top your extravagant paris date, why'd you even add the second rule?"

for the first time, beomgyu didn't have an immediate response. he was quiet, way too quiet.

"look, you can just tell me you were trying to freeload off of me." beomgyu looks taken back, his face scrunched up, so you add more to clarify, "i would be pissed but you don't have to be all secretive about it. i can get over it if you pay me four hundred dollars in cash--"

"let's say i was freeloading off you, which by the way, i should've thought of that--"

"correction, you were freeloading off of me."

beomgyu ignores you. "you know what, i just thought of something. there is one way you could top the hot balloon paris date."

your interest was piqued but you try not to show how your ears perked up, and clear your throat. "what is it?"

despite your attempt to seem disinterested, when beomgyu motions to bring your head closer so he can whisper something, you don't hesitate.

"i don't know, maybe it'll be too hard on you...like it takes a lot of courage--"

"just say it!" you yelled impatiently.

"say i liiike you beomgyu-ah~" he said with what you think is a pout, and top of that you'd bet a hundred bucks that he was fluttering his long lashes too.

you pull your head away. "beomgyu."

he shrugged. "i'm giving you a very easy task, take it or leave it."

you exhale, its true. it isn't that bad. "i'm not doing the aegyo though."

"thats the entire point! just don't do it at all then."

"oh, okay. bye, it wasn't pleasant seeing you beomgyu, as always." you waved him away and start untying your apron to leave your shift, but beomgyu was still there. because you've heard the third groan in a row.

you, however, didn't notice that he came to the back in the register area until you felt his hand touching your struggling ones that were trying to untie your apron for the past..three minutes now.

you dropped them to your sides, feeling a little awkward at the sudden proximity.

"were you actually going to close?" he asked as you felt beomgyu trying to untangle the knot.

"no that was a lie, i'm leaving because my shift ended."

"huh. you know i was about to apologize for bothering you. and i never apologize."

"who said you weren't bothering me anyway? in fact, you've been bothering me this whole month more than normal."

you looked back to beomgyu, "why'd you stop? can you try to untie it faster?"

"alright alright, jesus."

the rest of the time that he spent untying the knot, it was quiet. oddly.

"done. i have to go now though, homework and stuff." he said backing away.

you stopped him by holding his wrist back. "hey, are you mad? it's kind of weird, i've never seen you mad."

he looked back at you with a raised brow. you rolled your eyes, correcting yourself. "okay, well i've never seen you mad this month"

you let go of his wrist because hes fully turned to face you, with his arm crossed.

"maybe, maybe i wasn't mad because i didn't see hanging out with you to be the biggest nuisance in the world."

"well..you're mad now."

"say i like you."

"huh?"

"you don't have to do the aegyo, i'm exempting it because i am a very nice friend."

okay, so now you're lost. you don't know what's going on, at all. but hey at least you'll get a perk of ending the dare!

do you...want to end the dare?

okay, what the actual fuck. why are you having that thought?

"i like you beomgyu-ah." you mumbled reluctantly in the most monotone, robotic voice ever. and his previous sorta serious face morphs into a fit of laughter.. KNEE slapping laughter.

"god you should've--you should've seen your face!" he said pointing at you while he uses his other hand to hold his stomach. like an elementary bully ad.

and the fit of laughter continued.

"was that whole im mad act fake? you're...ugh." you groaned. another day, another beomgyu being a total dick.

you took beomgyu by the wrist again to push him out of the back. "bye! it's time for you to leave!" you said loudly.

"alright alright i'm leaving--ow!"

you had to go through seeing him laughing all the way to the exit door, but hey, at least he was gone. you sigh, relieved.

but then you hear the ding again.

"i like you too by the way" beomgyu shouted out. and then left again.

typical annoying, irritating, choi beomgyu. leaving you to make an analysis of what he meant by saying that... for the entire night.

#txt x reader #txt fluff #txt oneshots #txt fanfic #beomgyu x reader #beomgyu fluff #beomgyu imagines #beomgyu scenarios #beomgyu #soobin #yeonjun #taehyun #hueningkai #txt fics #beomgyu drabbles #txt drabbles

[bobbile-blog]

Not sure if anyone’s said this yet but now that we have Laterano events plural I’m fascinated by their (imo) very deliberate choice of protagonists, and there are almost a couple of layers of narrative going on there. I struggle a little figuring out how to get this into words but specifically I think they’re chosen to be people who can carry a narrative without contradicting the orthodox morals of the church. There’s a LOT of vaguely anti-authoritarian rambling below the cut so please kindly bear with me and my English major brain.

I can’t really start there though. One of the reasons this is so brain hurty is how deeply it’s woven into the storyline, so to start, I have to verbalize how Laterano and Arknights writing more generally is different from other, similar settings. Because like, I hear the words “morally negative church in a grimdark setting” and my brain immediately shuts off. Come on, that’s so far beyond low-hanging fruit, if you’ve seen any grimdark setting ever you know exactly what that looks like. And sure, it was fine the first two or three times you saw it, depending on your tolerance for that kinda thing, but it gets boring quick and even when it was new it was kinda uninteresting story-wise. “Religion is always fake because it inspires hope which means everyone who takes meaning from it is either a corrupt grifter or naive and misled” isn’t just edgy nonsense, it’s also basically useless as an actual critique. It tells you absolutely nothing except how to tune out a particular kind of story, and a story that tries to get you to hear less is doing its job wrong.

So, Arknights does something different. Instead of denying the premise of the church entirely, it actually takes it at its word. Laterano is, in almost every definition of the word, a paradise. It is basically unmatched in terms of actual quality of life, with its only competitors being the Durin cities and maybe Aegir, and is worlds apart from now much the rest of Terra sucks. More than that, though, the paradise is specifically tailored to the worldview of a religion with a strong central authority - when I say it takes it at its word, I mean the authoritarian bits too. Laterano is a city that lives in perfect order and peace because everyone follows the law perfectly and they all understand each other and never fight. Empathy is really important for this, as it allows for a believable amount of superhuman societal order. Laterano has very little crime, political drama, or quarrels in general. It’s the promises of a strict higher authority actually taken at face value: everyone follows the rules and that means they have effectively unfettered freedom, because they don’t want to break the rules and therefore they can do anything they want.

Laterano is specifically written to be a believable paradise in a setting that has none, so that when the story then turns around and criticizes that setting, it has significantly more weight. Even when the promises of paradise are taken at face value, there are still issues that cannot be addressed because the system is inherently flawed even in the imaginary scenario where it works. Even worse, the problems that poke holes in the imaginary perfect scenario are the same problems that they face in the real world, like “how do you deal with the interpretation of scriptures” and “hey there’s this racism thing I keep hearing about should we be worried about that or what”. Because of the way this imaginary perfect system works, we then look back on our real world in a new light and understand it a little better. It’s good critique.

Okay so how did we get here and what does this have to do with the protagonists? Well, this starts with Fiametta in Guide Ahead, because she’s a really weird protagonist. This is a cold take at this point but despite being the character on the front of the box, she has very little to actually do with the central conflict of the event. Most of the conflict is handled by Ezell first and Andoain second, and Fiametta mostly putters around putting holes in people until the finale where Andoain receives the answer he’s been looking for, he turns to explain it to the world, and he runs into the only person in the whole of Laterano who does not care about his motivations or his revelation. Her role, in other words, is to replace the climax of Andoain’s story with her own, and in doing so she makes it much harder to actually get a resolution and a meaning out of the story (this should not be taken as a criticism of her character, let me cook). Guide Ahead’s ending is hazy, with only small piecemeal resolutions to its conflicts, and for the longest time that was just the way the event was written and it stood on its own.

But now, Hortus de Escapismo is out and the monkey brain see patterns. Specifically, with the choice of protagonists. Because Executor is definitely different from Fiametta as a protagonist, but there’s one particularly important connection between the two, and that’s that as I mentioned in the beginning, they allow for stories don’t contradict orthodox morality. Fiametta we went over, as she’s uninterested in any of Andoain’s morality and just wants him dead. Executor, though, is purely focused on his mission and views the world through that lens. He only wants to achieve his objective, and while helping the needy is in line with the stated objectives of the church and he does do so when able, it’s secondary to his assigned task. He does change as he gets further into the story, and we’re not gonna ignore that, but we’ll be back to it later. What I mean is more that he is designed as a person who is able to lead a story that doesn’t contradict with the morals of Laterano. He sees the injustice and suffering around him, but that’s not his job, so he doesn’t need to solve it to have a complete story with a happy ending.

This is where it really gets complicated, so I apologize if I don’t explain this very well. I see this as us dealing with multiple layers of fiction: the events of the story, the perspective of the church, and our perspective as readers. Back to the first point - authoritarian institutions almost always use stories to sell people on their brand of order. Simple stories, simple enough that even calling them myths seems like overselling it a little, your “Saint George slays a dragon” kinda thing. This is the point of the second layer, the perspective of the church. I don’t really have an in-world justification for this layer - maybe you could make the argument that it has to do with Law’s perspective on things, but I don’t totally buy that - I think it’s more in a weird narrative transition space for people who don’t read very carefully. Regardless, Fiametta and Executor’s shared indifference to the questionable circumstances surrounding them is designed to let them tell a story to prop up the existing order. Their protagonist status and their missions are specifically constructed to allow them to ignore the suffering around them, and as such ignore the larger questions that might poke holes in the larger order. They’re both playing out the story of Saint George, where they go and find a bad guy and kill them and that’s all there is to it. The story is designed and told specifically for that “that’s all there is to it”.

But, as we said earlier, this is a good critique, and as such it intentionally undercuts this story with the third layer: what we actually see as readers. We are shown the suffering and the injustice, and then get to see our protagonists ignoring that to pursue their goals. This is what gives Guide Ahead’s ending its unique texture, which sets it apart from every other event with a vaguely unresolved ending. We have seen the actual issues with Laterano, and also watched our protagonist explicitly ignore them in favor of her own story. It’s unsatisfying in a way that only really makes sense to me if we as the readers have an understanding of intentional authorship. Whether it be Yvangelista XI or Law or The Actual Real Life Pope, there are issues here that we want to see a resolution to but people are choosing not to address them. Again, it’s good critique. Not only does it push the reader to unpack and understand the actual real-world technique, but it also helps blunt it. You have just seen a plot and protagonist ring uncharacteristically hollow. You then look around to see why that is, and you realize there are many things that should have been resolved that weren’t. The next time you see a story resolve with that same hollow-ness, you know where to look. Surprise! Harry Potter was propaganda the whole time. It’s okay, it was never good, you were just twelve.

I guess the last thing is where we go from here, because Executor’s story breaks this mold somewhat. In Hortus de Escapismo, he has to deal with a mission that isn’t actually bounded by his normal rules, and because of that he actually does have leeway to help the people around him. He starts as someone who is totally mission-focused, but by the end of the event he’s done a total 180 and is blocking Oren’s attack, which makes the mission harder but helps the non-mission-critical civilians of the monastery. He breaks from the rigid thinking of “kill the bad guy and that’s all there is do it”, and gives his attention to the people he isn’t supposed to see. I think this is an indication of the direction we’re going to be headed in the future with Laterano events. The events aren’t going to get better - they’re going to keep being just as morally murky and complicated as in the past - but the characters are going to get better at handling it, and when they do, they’re going to actually start to change things for the better.

Goddamn that was a lot of writing for 1 AM. I still have a. Lot of thoughts on this event with stuff like empathy and Lemuen and Federico being an autistic icon(my beloved) but I’m going to leave things there, I think, because if I write for any longer my phone is going to crash when I try to post this. Anyway if you actually made it to the end thanks for listening to me rambling and I hope that made sense. Cheers.

#arknights #arknights thoughts #hortus de escapismo #laterano #fiametta #executor arknights #I deadass had to ask folks to proofread this one #to make sure I didn’t sound like I didn’t sound off my rocker #also don’t mind my random Harry Potter slander that’s an entirely different rant

[ellievickstar]

Nobody’s Choice

A/N: I am so sorry I ended part 2 in a cliffhanger…it was cruel…and…rude. I hope that this beautiful fic will…make up for my…wrong doings <3

Summary: When then mating bond finally snaps into place, what are you meant to do when you realise your mate has another in his heart, will you break it off to save yourself, or will your mate be able to save this heartbreak?

Request: N/A but highly anticipated.

Pairing: Azriel x Witch!Reader

Warnings: breaking of mating bond, talking to ancestors, major angst, cliffhanger, self-doubt.

My Masterlists & Rules

Part 1 — His Second Choice? // Part 2 — Your Choice.

~*~*~*~*~

"Azriel...I-" But something made you pause. You knew there was no way Azriel could be with you forever. You had seen the lingering glances he had given Elain. You couldn't deny that they shared a connection that you both didn't have...not anymore. However, Azriel was also a male of honour. If you wished it, he would never see Elain again, but how could you do that to him. He will eventually resent you for it, maybe not of his own accord, but with time. You couldn't rip away his will, but you couldn't give him what he wanted in this moment right now. Eventually he would realise that though you were mates, his heart belonged else where.

You looked down at the male again. And as you weighed your options carefully, you knew what you had to say, what you needed him to believe.

"Okay," You plastered a smile on your face, and in a split second you let a piece of happiness in all this sorrow slip down the bridge of the bond and slam into his side. It was enough for him to beam up at you, to sweep you into his arms as he celebrated. If only he knew that inside, you couldn't enjoy this moment with him. He thanked you, his eyes bright, and without a word he instructed you to get ready quickly, because he wanted to give you the best night you had ever experienced. Nodding, you shooed him away.

As soon as he was out of your sight, gone to prepare what he planned, you fell to you knees. Maybe, you could lie to yourself, but the second you awoke you could feel that spark of desire from his side of the bond, maybe it was so small that even he didn't know it was there, but it only takes so much for a spark to become a flame and a flame to become wildfire.

You had to let go of him, you had to break it. Break this damn bond that shackled you to him, break it, and return home. Ever since the war you itched to return to your own people, but stayed in Velaris because you had hoped that Azriel would choose you. It was naive and a ridiculous notion.

You remembered what you had said to your ancestor. You remembered her eyes when you asked that question. How do you break the bond? She had looked at you, sad and sombre. You knew you weren't the first witch to be soulmates with a Fae, and you wouldn't be the last to break the bridge between two souls.

You closed you eyes and with a wave of your hand, who you summoned, appeared. You opened your eyes and came face to face with none other then the suriel. It bent down to meet your eyes, and as you stood tall, folding your hands in front of you skirts, its eyes widened in recognition. "Princess-" "Queen. My mother died. But you already knew that," The Suriel was silent but nodded it's head, waiting for orders.

"I need you to tell me how to break a mating bond," Hearing that, The Suriel paused. It didn't want to tell you, after all, The Suriels prioritised their friend's wellbeing first. You had become friends with The Suriel species when you were eight, they were your friends along side you, and they were very protective. However, this was a question that you needed the answer to.

"A ritual, you can find it in your mother's library, but be careful little one, many have suffered dire consequences," The ominous warning sent chills down your spine, and you nodded. You weaved anew cloak from thin air and handed it to The Suriel, before it bowed and left. You sensed there was worry in its eyes, however, you couldn't care enough. You needed to do this.

With a wave of a hand and a flash of light, you looked around as your surroundings melted away and became something else entirely.

Home.

~*~*~*~*~

The walls were the same. So was the lighting. But the bookshelves were dusty, the table worn and on the verge of breaking, what once full of life, was now abandoned. Before the first war you had lived here, but after your people had abandoned this place, the knowledge with it. And now you needed one piece of information in the whole library.

As you scanned the endless stacks of scrolls and books upon books, stuffed onto shelves that looked like they were going to collapse under the weight of the books, you realised that you should have asked The Suriel specifically which book you needed to get. It would take forever to go through your mother's private library.

Cracking your knuckles and gritting your teeth, you approached the first shelf. This would take a while. But, it would be worth it.

The first hour went by with no luck.

The second hour you felt Azriel reach down the bond, you gently told him that you had plans and couldn't join him.

The third hour you finally found it.

"Oh for wickedness sake, it was here the whole time!?" You hissed as you realised that the spell you were looking for...was in your mother's old diary. Of course. You should have looked there first. Part of you wanted to throw the damn book across the room with how much time it took to find it. However, you calmed yourself. Now all you needed to do is get your hands on some damn salt...and a knife.

You conducted a few practice rituals to ensure that your magic was ready for the advanced spells, the sky had already darkened by the time you were ready to journey home. The journey back home was, tiring, after a full day of searching and rituals, you weren't exactly primed for spell-casting, especially not transportation spells. Then again, if you didn’t return, the night court would suspect you. So you prepared yourself for the exhaustion that would hit you the second you arrived.

But nothing would have prepared you for what greeted you the second you arrived.

Rhysand and Cassian were there…waiting. Their eyes were fuelled with anger as they stepped towards you.

“Where have you been?” Rhys demanded. Cassian stayed silent as his gaze stayed on you, surveying you for possible injuries. You fidgeted as you tried to take a stp back but you were stopped by two people behind you. Mor and Nesta.

“I was just…running errands.” “Don’t lie to me,” Rhys snapped. Your eyes shuttered. You looked down and cursed as tears began to stream down your face uncontrollably. Everything you had been keeping inside came down in waves, one after another.

Gentle hands guided you to sit as your friends surrounded you. “You can finally take control of all this, why do you hurt yourself?” Rhys prompted. You shook your head. No. There was no control in this situation. “I don’t want control, I want to let go,” You choked out, crying into the front of Mor’s dress. Nesta pulled back your hair and brushed through it, the action soothing your slightly. Rhys swore as he realised how miserable you truly were. Cassian was furious.

“I’m gonna kill Azriel,” He mumbled, but you stopped him. “No! It’s not his fault…besides, not all mates are meant to be,” You didn’t know whether you were convincing them or yourself. You only knew that you couldn’t tell them your plan. You were so…tired…

“I’m just gonna go to bed…can we do this tomorrow?” You asked. They all exchanged looks, but eventually, you were helped to your room, and it wasn’t long before you finally fell asleep.

~*~*~*~*~

“You are a child…remember…you are the descendent of the greatest kind in all on Prythian…you are their queen,” You looked away from your ancestor as you kneeled before her. “My heart tells me to stay, my head tells me to break it,” The Queen smiled as she looked down at you. It was a kind smile. Like no other, it was pure, and genuine and something in you warmed at that familial love that you missed so much. “And what of your gut?” You went silent as you looked down.

“I’m not sure…” You fidgeted again. “You know the consequences of breaking the bond, yes?” You nodded. Most witches died because of the absolute pain they went through. The only witches who could survive were those of the strongest blood. Azriel would feel the unbearable pain too but his chances of dying were slim as he was mated to a witch not a fae.

“What about your mate?” You asked her. Her face fell as her eyes seemed to flicker to hurt, sorrow. “He was a faerie…like yours…but different. He had beautiful red hair that fell to his shoulders and he could manipulate flame. I loved him…it was us against the world,” Tears seemed to fill her eyes. “We fought to be together and eventually, we were. I thought we were happy, I had four beautiful children, one was a true witch while two were fae and witch, the last on was a fae. It was two girls and two boys. We were a family..” She closed her eyes, a stray tear falling down her face.

“On day I came home early from the market with the children…and there he was. With his mistress. The fae female that his father had wanted him to marry when we first got together,” Her tone was bitter and your heart broke for your ancestor. “I left him…never heard from him again. But I do know that he ended up marrying that whore and having their own children.” She seemed to straighten. “I don’t believe that all fae males are that way…but you must understand. Just because he is you mate. Does not mean his heart will stay with you. Because we are not like them, we are witches, and for millenia we have been hunted and hated,” You nodded your understanding.

You had to remember. A comet could become a meteor. A candle could become a blaze. A male can be a monster. But when, does a ripple become a tidal wave? when does the reason become the blame? does a male become a monster?

She waved to you, dismissal as your vision of you surroundings began to darken. You were ready.

~*~*~*~*~

Dragging yourself out of bed at 3 in the morning was far from easy. But you needed to sneak out before anyone else was awake. You listened carefully to the house around you, keeping an ear open for footsteps or careful calculated breathing instead of the shallow breaths of deep sleep.

You were in the clear.

Silently, you waved a hand in the air as you summoned the portal to your home realm. It was time for you to finally...finally execute this plan. Humming, you smiled as you realised you'd finally be free. Yet something weighed down something made you want of pause and think of what could be. But as you looked into your memories, those thoughts, his heart, tears filled your eyes and you looked at your palms.

You didn’t understand. Was she prettier then you? Was it because she liked flowers not books, liked gentleness more then confidence? Was it because she was brighter? Softer on the inside? Or was it because she was still naive to the darkness of the world?

Why?

Why would the cauldron give you a mate that loved another?

That you did not know. But you sure as hell would do something about it. You drag your ass out of this bed and perform that damned spell, you would break this cursed bond then you would go home. To the people you hid so long ago. And you would rule with compassion and love. You would find peace in this chaos, find light in this dark.

A wave of your hand, an inhale and exhale. You closed your eyes for a second as you felt your surroundings shift and change, you held the book that you had grabbed tight to your chest and as you pealed you eyes open you knew exactly where you were.

The library might have restricted people from winnowing in, but faeries didn’t know how to ward of witch spells. You sifted through the pages, carefully, afraid that the book would fall apart in your hands, terrified that if you even blinked your plan would disintegrate before your very eyes.

You had to finish this.

A bag materialised from the air as you pulled out bright red sand. It was unique to your kind, specially made for rituels. This was no ordinary coloured sand. To your knowledge, specially taught witched had bathed this sand in powerful spell potions, they could be manipulated to follow any shape, as long as it was right. The sand would be able to activate the ritual, to break the bond.

You smiled as you reminisced over the lessons that you had learnt such information from, when your mother was still alive to chase you around the palace if just to make you sit down and listen for five minutes. Now, you would give anything to sit with her, to listen to her careful warnings, the soft lilt of her voice, or the firmness she held as she tried to dissuade you from doing anything mischievous. But that was a long time ago, and…she was long gone.

Your heart cracked.

You blinked back more tears as you finished pouring the last line of the symbol. It was a large circle that had symbols tracing the inside, slowly spiralling to the middle. It was very old language that loosely translated to ‘breaking mates’.

Taking a deep breath, you stepped in and as you dropped a strand of Azriel’s hair in the centre, one that you had picked up from his brush, light flashed. It was bright and it was hot, you flinched closing your eyes.

And screamed.

~*~*~*~*~

It was unbearable, the pain. It was endless, it was torture, it was everything and nothing all at the same time. You screamed louder, screamed even as your throat was dry and hurt like hell. You screamed as the pain seemed to stab you over and over again. Screamed as you fell to your knees, barely being able to handle the torture that was punishment for breaking a fated bond.

Azriel’s POV

My eyes flew open as pain began to grew in my chest. It burnt, burnt like the fire that had lit my hands up all those years ago, it speared my soul and I watched in horror as a thread seemed to be materialising from my chest, it was going somewhere.

I barely managed to stand as I stumbled through the door, hand gripping onto that thread, some part of me knew, something was wrong with Y/N.

I made it to Cassian’s room, pounding on the door even as the pain seemed to rip me apart. He opened the door after a few minutes, his eyes heavy from sleep, and I saw Nesta behind him, annoyed. But as they saw me in my state of distress, saw the bond that had somehow shown itself clear as day, they immediately jumped, Cassian rushing to support me, Nesta running to where ever the thread was leading to.

“The library! Hurry!” She hollered back at us. Cassian let me lean against him, we seemed to have woken the whole house as I heard Nyx begin to cry from all the commotion. Rhys winnowed in front of us, if looks could kill we would both be dead, but his demeanour shifted, rushing to help Cassian with my other side. Cassian grunted out the location and Rhys nodded. However, nothing in all 500 years of training could have prepared us for what we would see.

When we entered the library, my knees were ready to give out, I watched, terrified, and my gaze was hazy as I looked to see Y/N, in the middle of a spell. It had to be. I recognised the sand from the times she had been talking about her abilities. But what was she doing. My head pounded and as I read the old language that Amren had taught me, my heart dropped.

I reached out, wanting to hold on to that bond, but as Y/N looked at me, after what seemed like an eternity, through that blinding light, blood dripped down her nose.

Drip.

Drip..

Drip…

And the pain stopped as I collapsed, screaming being the last thing I hear as darkness consumed me.

~*~*~*~*~

taglist: @azriels-mate123 @penguinsworldsblog @hannahx1111 @jacksonpleasestopkillingme @positivewitch @happyseadreams @fuckthatfeeling @meritxellao @xiangping-28 @clarkie-carmody-blog @aroseinvelaris @azrielhours @shadowsinger-654 @azzydaddy @nisa-wisa @cosmic-whispers @cat-or-kitten @thecraziestcrayon @thegirlintheshadows101 @marina468 @act1839 @bigcreatorwombatdreamer @holywolfsstuff @gengen64

(If your user is in bold I could not tag you, sorry T^T if you want to be tagged please specify in the replies <3)

A/N: HAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAH HOW YA LIKE ME NOW!? I love you guys…but you really didn’t think I wouldn’t end part 3 in a cliff hanger? After part 2!? Think again :D Love you guys, thanks for all the support <33333

Part 3 out now

#azriel #azriel imagine #azriel shadowsinger #azriel acomaf #azriel acotar #azriel x reader #azriel x reader angst #Acotar fluff #rhys acotar #cassian acotar #feyre acotar #nesta acotar #nessian #azriel shadow singer x reader angst #azriel shadow singer x reader #acotar #acotar fandom #acosf #a court of silver flames #a court of mist and fury #azriel angst #mor acotar

[kvrokasaa]

Darling

cw: atsumu x reader, fem!reader, kissing, fluff, reader has a backstory, mention of someone dying, reader has a little brother, set in college

wc: 3.8k

A/n: I've been having Atsumu brainrot, mans literally has me rewatching Haikyuu for him.

"....Y/n-chan?" A sudden voice pulls you out of your head, you turn and see Isa standing there, waving her hand in front of her face. "Goodness, were you even listening?" She pulls a stern look, but you know that she's only pretending.

You just made it back to school after taking a year off for family issues. You needed to clear your head. Thankfully, the college let you come back, but there was one issue. You had to redo your first year. When you first heard this, you were taken aback. But after some time, you decided that you'd actually benefit from this. Being able to meet new people and not having to worry about others in your original grade level ask about what happened and why you were gone for so long.

Isa, your friend since your second year in middle school, opens her mouth to talk, but you can't hear what she's saying. Your mind is still clouded with memories of what happened just a few weeks prior.

Before you took off a year, it had been the beginning of your first year in college. But before you even had time to get accustomed and find out what major you wanted to take, you received news from your brother that his dad had died. You and your brother have different dads, and you were never close with his dad, only remembering him from when he was a drunk and always demanding everyone's attention and time. So the news wasn't that life-impacting for you, but you can't say the same for your brother. You took a year off because you knew that your brother needed you, he was only a first-year in middle school and needed all the support he could get.

"....But anyway, that's all that you missed." Isa's voice comes back into your mind, purging the memories of seeing your brother crying with a small black suit on. "So, do you know what you want to major in now?" She smiles at you, but the smile vanishes when she notices that you aren't paying attention again. "Seriously, you need to focus. I know that someone in your family just died but.." "He wasn't in my family," you interject. You don't want people to hear that he died, you don't want the pity looks -- you can't stand the pity looks.

"Right, not in your family." She stares at you before finishing, "But seriously, you need to focus. This isn't high school, you can't just cheat on everything." Isa raises her hands in mock surrender when you give her a pointed look. You understand what she means, you have to pay attention in class. You shouldn't let these thoughts get ahold of you.

"Culinary." Isa gives you a confused stare, not expecting the word to come out of your mouth. "I want to major in culinary." The look never leaves her face. "But you don't like cooking, and you've almost burned down my kitchen every time you've tried to cook."

You nod your head, "Yeah, I know. But over my break, I cooked for my family and realized that it helps." "So, like a coping mechanism?" You nod at that, yeah you guess it is a coping mechanism. You know her question before it leaves her mouth. "I'm going to major in culinary and take business classes afterward."

Again, "Bakery." The one word ceases the confusion written all over Isa's face. "Okay, did you get everything filled out? I can help if you want." You give her a pointed look and a playful glare, "You just started college, like, yesterday. There's no way you know how to help me already."

You both laugh. "Alright, this is me. See you later, and hey, tell me if there are any cute guys!" Isa waves you goodbye and rushes into her class. You let a small smile mold onto your face, only Isa knows how to make you smile when your mind is covered in darkness.

You make your way into the building. The culinary class is in the fine arts building and has its own cafeteria. To say you got lost more than once would be an understatement. You cringe at the embarrassment of having to ask three different people how to get to the culinary building.

You rushed into the class and finally made it. But now you wished you didn't. More than half of the class were looking at you, their eyes drawn to you like a magnet. You pushed some hair behind your ear and walked down to an open seat. But before you could sit, the professor calls you up to the class. A sigh leaves your mouth, you hope this won't be too embarrassing.

"Miss, L/n, mind telling me why you're late?" You put your head down, your hair fanning over your eyes, concealing them from everyone else in the room. "Sorry, I got lost. I-" "How many times have I heard that excuse?" The professor sighed and looked around the room. Everyone looked away, trying not to get caught. From the looks of it, everyone is supposed to be taking notes, writing on the whiteboard is what gave it away.

"Mr. Miya." Two boys flinched, but only one of them raised their head. He has blonde hair, more like orange, and his eyes a light brown. He smiled sheepishly, "Hey teach." His tone was full of awkwardness as if he was embarrassed that he was caught. "This isn't your class, go back to your own." The professor gave him a small glare, looks like you're both not her favorite people. "Aw, come one, Mrs. Greene. Practice ended early," Miya smiled.

She sighed and looked back over to you, then nodded over to Miya. "You don't need the notes today. Take it as a small punishment for not coming early," she finished with small malice in her tone. "Atsumu, give the new kid a tour." You were about to interject, to tell her that you've been here before. But Atsumu already grabbed your hand and dragged you out of the class.

After you two were father away and you couldn't hear the small giggles from the room, Atsumu dropped your hand and placed his behind his head. "That class is a snooze, why do people even take it?" He wasn't asking you, which was obvious. But you still answered, "Mainly because they want to." You didn't mean for your voice to be full of malice, it just came out like that. You expected Atsumu to be a little mad, but he only looked at you from the corner of his eye and laughed a little bit. "Yeah, I guess that's why."

You thanked that he wasn't mad, thankful that he let the comment roll down his back. "Anyway, what do you take?" You should elaborate, but Atsumu understood. "Volleyball, I like it. It helps me forget about stupid things, and it's fun to play." He smiled after he finished talking about his favorite sport. "Yeah, that's why I take culinary. It helps me forget about things." Why are you telling him this? It took half a year for you to tell Isa, your best friend, why you took a year off of school. But this boy, you just open your mouth and the words pour out.

"What things?" Atsumu's hands are back down by his side, resting inside of his pants pockets. He gives you a confused look, not a pitiful look, or a pushing one. He's just genuinely curious. And before you could stop yourself, the words leave your mouth. As if he's pulling them out of your throat. "My stepdad, well not anymore, my mom divorced him a while ago, he died last year. He drank himself to death, he was supposed to quit, he told my brother and mother that he'd quit. But he started up again and this time he.." You look down, not wanting to finish the last few words.

Atsumu understood though. He finished what you were going to say in his mind. "I'm sorry, didn't mean to make you remember it." "Oh, don't be sorry. He hasn't been in my family for a while now, and I don't really care. He was an asshole. Guess that makes me selfish, huh?" Atsumu shook his head, his hand making its way up to your back, moving you away from a passerby riding a bike. "Nah, you're not selfish, he lost your trust, that doesn't make you selfish."

That's the first time someone told you that you aren't selfish for thinking this way. Everyone else gave you glares and told you to shut your mouth, but this boy that you just met told you the words you've been waiting to hear. "So you like cooking because it helps you forget about him?" It took you a second to remember why you even started talking about your old stepdad. And after that second, you nodded, your face back to its fake brightness. "Yeah, but it's not just that. I like to cook, used to hate it honestly, but now it helps me and I can make good treats." You put on a fake smile and walked a little faster, wanting to get done with the doom and gloom talk.

After the tour, which you didn't really need, was over, you both headed back to the dorms. The sun was almost setting, which shocked you. The college was so big that it took you almost a full day to go over. But it wasn't just the buildings you went over, Atsumu showed you some private spots that he visits when he needs to clear his head. Of course, one of those spots was the volleyball gym, but also some really beautiful places. You didn't expect a jock to be this nice and have some personality.

"Which one is your dorm?" Ever the gentleman, he wants to walk you to your dorm. But too bad for him, you don't live in a dorm, you were able to get your own apartment last year. Thank god the lease didn't expire when you went back to your hometown to see your family. The owner only smiled and wished you luck, you're so grateful to have a landlord like him.

"I have my own apartment, so no need to walk me home." Atsumu's eyes shined, his smile even wider than when he was talking about volleyball, which was really wide. "Cool! Can I come over?" Usually, you'd say no, of course, you'd say no. A boy is asking to come over and you live alone. But the puppy eyes Atsumu gives you make you give in, which is a new thing. The only puppy eyes that work on you are from Isa and your little brother.

Atsumu's smile got even bigger when he heard your sigh. "Fine, but no staying long. I have a friend coming over later."

You both made it to the apartment and headed inside. "This is really nice!" His hands roamed around, his fingers tracing patterns on the tapestry hanging on the wall. He went to the kitchen to look around some more when you suddenly remembered your room. Clothes are everywhere, and what's worse is certain clothes that a boy shouldn't see are on your floor. You rushed to your room, slamming the door and quickly cleaning up.

Atsumu's knock at the door made you stop in your tracks. "Everything okay?" He sounded worried, you could almost picture his eyes full of worry and confusion. You almost smile at the thought. You gently slap your cheek, snap out of it, he's just a boy. But that brings a blush to your face, a boy is in your house and you're alone.

Thoughts form in your mind and the blush deepens. You quickly open the door, out of breath and disheveled, "Yeah, perfectly fine!" His hand comes up and rests against your forehead, "Are you okay? Your face is really red." Your blush deepens even more and you swat his hand away. "Yeah, I'm fine, just come on." You push away from your room and walk to the front door, "You got the tour, now leave. My friend is coming over soon."

After the door closes, you sigh and slump against it. The blush finally goes away. You wish you could go inside your brain and wire yourself to not like Atsumu. But it's obvious from the thoughts and the blush that this stems more than like.

After a fun night with Isa, aka just drinking and watching cheesy rom-cons, you ushered her to leave. Once everything was clean and the lights were out, you made your way to bed.

"Okay class, today we're going to the cafeteria. You need to make some cake, make sure to look at your notes for reference!" Mrs. Greene shouted out before everyone left.

Everyone got to the cafeteria and made their way to the kitchen, all the equipment already lined up and clean. You're confused as to what cake everyone is making, but from the small whispers you concluded that it's whatever cake you really wanted. You decided to make something easy, a moist strawberry cake with cream cheese frosting.

After an hour of baking, everyone was assigned to put their cakes up and let the chef decide which one is the best. A competition, you suppose. You placed your cake on the tray and then placed it where everyone else put theirs.

"Your cake looks nice," a small, almost tired-sounding voice followed you back to the section of the kitchen where everyone is standing. "Oh, thanks," you gave the person a small smile, but it faltered when you saw who was talking to you. Is this a trick? Did Atsumu dye his hair? The stranger noticed your widened eyes that were staring up at his hair and quickly said, "I'm Osamu, Atsumu's brother." The shock wore off and you quickly nodded. "Oh, that makes sense. Nice to meet you." You were going to say your name, but Osamu shook his head. "I know your name, Y/n right? Atsumu wouldn't stop talking about you last night."

A small blush made its way up to your ears, he was thinking, no, talking about you last night? You thought you were crazy for thinking about Atsumu last night, not daring to voice those thoughts to Isa, but Atsumu was thinking about you too? The thought brings a small smile to your face. How nice, a random boy whom you just met, and that you're in love with, you think, has been thinking and talking about you last night.

The chef, more or less the instructor, clears his throat and you direct your attention back to him. He gives the class a kind smile, in complete contrast to Mrs. Greene, and points at your cake. "This one is the winner," he looks over at you and smiles again, "Great job, Y/n." Everyone claps, and you feel very accomplished, but also a little empty. It's hard to explain, you just got praise from your class and the instructor, but you feel like you haven't gotten praise from the one person that matters. And that person isn't Isa, she would praise you every time you made something that she could eat.

You're missing praise from a certain teasing blonde.

"Alright, now you can all eat some cake, but save room for lunch!" The instructor calls over everyone since they're talking. You take a piece from your own cake and wrap it up, saving it for the man who's intruding on your thoughts. The instructor looks at you confused, usually people take a piece of cake from other people's cake. "It's for someone else, Mr. Greene," Osamu butts in and explains How did he know? Also, Mr. Greene? As in Mrs. Greene? Mr. Greene and Mrs. Greene are married?

You shake off the thoughts, that's not important right now. You say your goodbyes and head to the volleyball gym. But footsteps that aren't yours stop you in your tracks. You turn your head and see Osamu walking up to you. He holds up the bento as a way of getting you to understand. "If I don't bring Atsumu some lunch, he'll get pouty and won't shut up about it the whole night." You make a small 'ah' sound and carry on to the gym. But a thought stops you again. "Wait, do you and Atsumu share a dorm? How? I tried to get in with Isa but they wouldn't let me." Osamu shakes his head, "No, we have our own apartment down the street from campus. Thought it would be better that way," he explains.

Your face drops, are you serious? Why did Atsumu act so excited last night if he also has his own apartment? What's this guy's motive? "Don't try to figure him out," Osamu interrupts your thoughts. "It'll only give you a headache." He shakes his head and sighs. A small mutter of 'stupid Atsumu' was heard from his mouth, but you didn't point anything out.

You both made it to the gym after a short walk paired with a little small talk. The sounds of balls smacking the ground were heard from outside and you flinched a little. How aren't they hurt? You sighed and walked into the gym, almost getting hit in the face before you had time to shut the door. A little shriek left your mouth and every player hyperfocused on you. You felt small under their stares.

"Hey! Hey! Hey!" A tall guy with owl-colored hair shouted. "There's a girl!" Another boy, a little shorter with orange hair also shouted. The ladder jumped over and smiled at you, despite him being shorter than the first guy, he was still taller than you. "My name is Shoyo, what's yours?"

"Y/n!" Atsumu shouted as he waved at you, jogging over to you. The shorter boy, Shoyo, looked over to the sudden shout. "You know her?" Shoyo asked. Atsumu smiled at you and then looked down at the bento in your hands. "Mm, is that for me?"

You followed his eyes, when did the bento get into your hands? You looked over to see Osamu, but he wasn't there. Your face fell, did he really just leave you alone with a bunch of men you've never met before, minus Atsumu? The weight left your hands and you looked back down to see the bento in Atsumu's hands. "Thank you," he smiled. "Oh, actually that's from your-" but he walked away before you could finish.

"We're practicing so you're going to have to leave," a boy with curly black hair told you. "Oh be nice Sakusa," the owl-looking boy said, "But he's right, you're going to have to leave, bye-bye!" He waved at you. Before you leave, you can hear Atsumu, "Hey, don't rush her, Bokuto!"

You smile and shake your head, and this time you don't try to hide the smile. Finally accepting that maybe you're starting to like this playful boy.

"Oh, really?" You giggled. It's been over five months since you met Atsumu and, as his rule, you have to call each other every night. If you don't call him, he gets super pouty and complains about it all day.

Atsumu's telling you about his day, talking about how he set the perfect ball for Bokuto and how they crushed the other team. They had a tournament early today, and they now, which you professed how you're super proud of him and his team. In the background, you can hear Osamu yell for Atsumu to shut up and go to sleep.

It's half past 11 and Atsumu seems super wired, still full of adrenaline from their earlier game. You smile at their little arguments, they always have them, and it's cute. "Oh really? You think our arguments are cute?" Shit, did you say that out loud?

You blushed and covered your mouth. "Okay, well I have to go, bye!" You quickly hung up the call and screamed into your pillow. How many times have you let your mouth speak your thoughts unintentionally? The first time was when you were with Atsumu at one of his spots, he looked so pretty and you accidentally voiced your thoughts. Thank god he thought you were talking about the sunset.

"Good morning, Y/n-chan!" Hinata's voice echoed through the walls of the gym. He waved and smiled big at you. You smiled and waved back at him. Over the five months, you got really close to the other players on the team. You even got close to Sakusa, which was surprising to everyone because he does not like people. But you suppose he appreciated how you always sprayed down a seat and cleaned it for him, and always put on hand sanitizer when you walk into the gym. Everyone said their welcome and good morning's to you as you walked past them, and you got pulled into a hug by Bokuto.

Atsumu ran up to you and hugged you, his arms tightly wrapped around you. "Good morning, Y/n!" You laughed and pulled away from him if you didn't, he would've tried to hug you for five minutes. Which you don't have time for. You grabbed his hand and led him to the club room.

"Here." You pulled a piece of cake from your bag, which is in a plastic bag. This is a tradition now, you lead him to the club room, give him a piece of cake, and wish him good luck in practice. You don't want the other players to see the cake, they'll want some and you don't have enough for everyone.

Atsumu likes it this way, it's like he gets his own thing from you.

What never happens in this little tradition is Atsumu eating the cake. He takes a bite, big enough to almost have eaten the whole piece in one go. "Mm, this one is good too, what is it?" He licks his lips and hums in delight. You smile, "It's just a normal carrot cake, I like them a lot and thought I'd share it with you. The carrot at the top reminded me of your hair." Your smile gets bigger when you see his little glare.

He swipes some frosting onto his thumb and sticks it in his mouth, "Mm, it's so good, can't stay mad at you." You smile again, happy that your work is appreciated by him. "Here, have a taste." There was no cake left, you gave him a confused look. But that confusion dissipates as quickly as it came when you feel his lips on yours.

His tongue makes its way into your mouth, his arms sliding around your waist, the plastic bag long forgotten on the floor. Atsumu pulled away, his arms still around your waist, "It's good right?" You could only nod in response, still shocked by the sudden kiss. Atsumu's hand made its way up to your cheek, his thumb smoothing the skin. He leaned in again, this time for just a peck. "Have a good day, darlin'"

#haikyuu!! #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu fluff #haikyuu #haikyū!! #miya atsumu x reader #miya astumu #miya atsumu #miya osamu #miya twins #hinata shoyo #hinata shouyou #hq bokuto #bokuto koutarou #sakusa kiyoomi #haikyuu sakusa #msby sakusa #msby bokuto #msby atsumu #haikyuu msby #msby black jackal #atsumu miya

[butterflydm]

wot reread: a memory of light (chapter 38-epilogue)

spoilers for a memory of light!

Well, the rest of the chapters have fewer pages in total than chapter 37 did, so this is going to be my last full reread post, though I do have a couple of follow-ups planned.

My timing ended up being pretty good, even though my original intention was just to reread books 1-3 in anticipation of the second season of the show. And now I’ve still got over a month to get good and excited about everything the show will be bringing to the table.

1. We go back to Rand, still deep in his conversation with TDO. The chapter “the Last Battle” really revolved around the battle between the forces outside Shayol Ghul, because it ended when the commander of the other army finally was killed (though there are still a ton of his forces to take care of, the head of the snake was cut off and so was the person who fancied himself Demandred’s replacement).

2. The ‘let go’ that Rand is hearing in his mind is in his father’s voice, and the meaning expands here -- let them sacrifice. it is their choice to make. And then Egwene’s voice -- am I not allowed to be a hero too?

Because this is something that Rand has been resisting over the course of the books -- basically ever since he accepted that he will be the sacrifice, he’s struggled with knowing that he’s not the only one, with knowing that other people are sometimes even sacrificing just to get him here, to this place. And, I imagine, with his tentative plans to maybe even survive this ‘sacrifice’, that’s going to make him feel even more guilty about other people giving up their lives in this fight.

3. He talks in dialogue with Egwene’s voice in his head (given that he’s existing around and between reality, it might really be Egwene’s voice too). He is not in charge of protecting her. He decided to take that charge on himself, back in EotW, but it was never his to claim. Let us die for what we believe, and do not try to steal that from us.

4. And so Rand takes himself through his list again, backwards, this time, releasing his feelings of shame for failing to save them, releasing his need to protect them. Letting go of the mountain that has been crushing him for the majority of the series.

He hadn’t realized how large it had become, how much he had let himself carry.

...

Ilyena was last. We are reborn, Rand thought, so we can do better the next time.

So do better.

5. And now Rand, as he stands surrounded by all time and nothing at the same time, comes to understand that the Darkness was never a being, never an entity of its own. It is the between of everything. It can only win if no one is willing to keep fighting against it.

6. Mat gets the news of Lan’s reported death. As he did with Egwene and with Elayne, he swallows the grief and doesn’t let it show to anyone else, instead using the news to spur the army onward to attack the now-stunned foe.

7. Rand tells TDO that he can’t win, and TDO argues that it has Rand in its grasp right now, and Rand says that that’s missing the point, because it was never just about his victory. The people he lists:

Morgase (?) - a woman, torn and beaten down, cast from her throne and made a puppet

Thom - a man who remembered stories and took fool boys under his wing

Moiraine - a woman who hunted truth before others could

Perrin (?) - a man whose family was taken from him, but who stood tall

Nynaeve - a woman who refused to believe she could not Heal those who had been harmed

Mat - a hero who insisted with every breath that he was not a hero

Egwene - a woman who would not bend her back while she was beaten and who stone with the Light for all who watched

Rand realizes -- “it was never about beating me. It was about breaking me.”

8. Okay, I have to say. I have to! But this is... this is literally also how the Seanchan work. This is their philosophy of life -- to take people and break them to the Seanchan’s purpose. As I’ve said before, there really is no way around the fact that the Seanchan are going to be the Great Evil of the Fourth Age. There are just too many Shadow-Seanchan parallels! Maybe Mat and Min can slow the train slightly but I don’t think they can actually put the breaks on it.

9. But back to now -- Rand and TDO watch the battlefield, where Mat is fighting -- Tam at his side, then Karede and his suicide-slave troops, then Loial and the Ogier. “Outnumbered three to one”. Mat is shouting in the Old Tongue: For the Light! For honor! For glory! For life itself!

I will take a moment to be glad that, despite the first half of this book trying so hard to align Mat with the slavers for whatever fucking reason, he’s not fighting for the slavers in this battle. That he actually did become the General of the Forces of the Light, not primarily the General of the Slavers. Looking back, it really does feel like the change was signaled when Mat first took off his Seanchan clothes and put back on his Two Rivers coat*. That seems to have been a visual cue about his change in characterization -- how he started pushing back more against Tuon, forcing her into more compromises, and standing more aligned with the Forces of Light rather than pandering to the slavers all the time. idk, maybe forcing Mat over to Ebou Dar at the start of the book was Sanderson’s way of trying to finally create a synthesis between the horrible Mat of CoT & KoD and the non-horrible Mat of the earlier books, and he felt like he actually had to take Seanchan!Mat to his worst conclusion before bringing him out again? It still really sucks that the Mat and Rand reunion happened during our low point of Mat’s characterization, though.

(* which appears to have been triggered by the ‘not pleasant’ conversation that Mat and Tuon had after Tuon berates him for not telling her that Egwene was briefly enslaved by the Seanchan. After that (off-screen) conversation, Mat starts being much more combative re: the Seanchan -- after that conversation is when he has his bitter/sarcastic thought that he’s not done much to convince Tuon to stop using damane and when he suggests to Min that she mislead Tuon about her viewings to try to soften her stance on Aes Sedai; so I think we can safely give Egwene credit for the turnaround in Mat’s characterization -- I wish that that conversation between Mat and Tuon hadn’t happened off-screen! like so many important emotional moments!, but it seems like perhaps that was a watershed moment for Mat)

Rand and TDO watch, and TDO taunts Rand “the son of battles. I will take him [Mat!]. I will take them all, adversary. As I took the king of nothing [this is Lan, I assume]”.

10. Mat thinks about how he knows he can win this battle, despite the horrible odds. He just needs “a favorable toss of the dice”.

And, not too far away, with the Trollocs outside his hiding place, Olver gives up on the idea of trying to get the Horn to Mat, and lifts the Horn of Valere to his lips.

11. First Mat, and then everyone else, hears Rand’s voice -- he calls out Shai’tan as wrong, telling everyone that Lan isn’t dead. And just after he says that, Mat hears the familiar golden and clear note of the Horn of Valere.

...wow, the Seanchan feel so superfluous to requirements right now. They didn’t show up until after the final combat was engaged, after Rand had his final necessary epiphany, after the Horn was blown (they have still not shown up, technically).

I’m going to take a moment to daydream about a world where Tuon’s nature as marath’damane was revealed and accepted, so she really did flee with the Seanchan (so that she can try to recover from this blow to her powerbase) and the Seanchan never returned to the Last Battle. This would be a much easier way to de-tangle Mat from the Seanchan than whatever he’s gonna need to actually do post-canon.

12. The Heroes of the Horn return and our first sight of them is Birgitte coming to save Elayne from Mellar, with a shining silver arrow. 😍

Birgitte standing over her own corpse kinda cracks me up. Good for her! It’s also probably the first time she’s felt like herself in books and books.

“That was the bloody Horn of Valere!” Mat announces to his troops. “We can still win this night!” Inside, he marvels over how the Horn was sounded without him, showing that one of the things that he’d believed that he was permanently tied to isn’t tied to him after all.

Well, if that knot can be untied, Mat, maybe another one can be as well.

13. Between losing Demandred and the appearance of the Heroes of the Horn, the Shadow are now the ones who are on the defensive, with some Trollocs breaking and trying to run away.

The mist of the Heroes forms near Mat and he feels a moment of worry, wondering if maybe someone on the side of the Shadow summoned them. Hawkwing rides up to Mat, and tells him, “Do take better care of what has been allotted you. Almost, I worried we would not be summoned for this fight.”

I know, right? The lack of urgency in the Mat-in-Ebou-Dar half of the book about actually getting him to Merrilor to blow the Horn was really frustrating to me too!

When Mat confirms that this mean they’re fighting for the Light, Hawkwing tells him, “We would never fight for the Shadow.” The rumors about the Horn are wrong -- I feel like we learned this back in TGH as well but, you know, Mat was dying at the time, so I don’t blame him for not remembering.

Yeah, here’s the line: “We have come to the Horn, but we must follow the banner. And the Dragon.” So it was Rand, Perrin, and Mat who learned that. But, like I said, I don’t blame Mat for not remembering.

14. Hawkwing and Amaresu both scold Mat for not showing Rand enough appreciation for saving his life. Honestly, so fair and legit for Mat to finally be on the other end of a scolding like that. “I have seen you murmur that you fear his madness but all the while you forget that every breath you breathe - every step you take - comes at his forbearance. Your life is a gift from the Dragon Reborn, Gambler. Twice over.”

Mat feels so scolded. As he deserves.

He’s told that they can fight here because they have Rand’s banner and because Rand is... technically sort-of kind-of leading them... from a distance.

Amazingly, Mat takes a moment out of this encounter to marvel at how pretty one of the heroes is and then Remind Himself again that he’s married. He really does have to keep Reminding Himself. One of these days, he’s not going to remember to Remind Himself until after he’s already slept with someone else. It’s been more subtle in this book than in ToM, but Mat is still constantly checking out Every Other Lady around him.

15. Olver gets dug out of his hole by Trollocs but Noal, now one of the Heroes, arrives to save him. I don’t care about Noal, and Jordan definitely didn’t do enough to build up their relationship in CoT & KoD, but I still got a little misty at the tiny orphan child feeling grateful that one of the people who ‘abandoned’ him has finally come back.

16. haha, this next chapter is called ‘wolfbrother’ so I guess that Perrin is finally gonna wake up. But first, we have Elayne!

She’s able to wriggle lose enough to make the medallion copy shift away from her skin and fall to the ground, and now she can embrace saidar again. Elayne apologizes to Birgitte but Birgitte laughs it off, “Why do you mourn, Elayne? I have it all back! My memory has returned. It is wonderful! I don’t know how you stood me these last few weeks. I moped worse than a child who’d just broken her favorite toy.” Ah, yeah, that confirms that Birgitte’s spiral into bitterness was not meant to be a reflection of Elayne but on the dark place that Birgitte was in, with her loss of memories, I think. But it’s a shame that it feels like parts of the fandom just took Birgitte’s unrelated bitterness as a reason to slam on Elayne more. My girl gets so much undeserved hate.

And Elayne and Birgitte will ride back into the battle together. Not as Aes Sedai and Warder, but as friends. 😍 😍 😍 😍 

17. Aviendha! I’ve missed you! Her timeline isn’t advancing as quickly as it has been for those further away from Shayol Ghul, so not as much as happened here in the valley. She can feel the channeling inside the Pit of Doom - “a quiet pulse”. Oh! The wolfbrother of the chapter’s title is actually Elyas, who Aviendha runs across now. The Darkhound Wild Hunt is happening, and hundreds of wolves have come to fight back against them.

Aviendha is about to go fetch channelers to help bring down the Darkhounds, when she spies Graendal a bit higher on the slope, with some Turned channelers, and Aiel guards under compulsion. Aviendha alerts her companions (Amys & Cadsuane) and then begins the fight against Graendal.

18. Elayne has a sword again. Where is she getting these swords? I’m just gonna assume it’s made out of Air or something. More useful than the sword, Elayne creates a banner with the Power, the red lion of Andor, lighting up the night.

19. [Mat] remembered, within those memories that were not his, leading forces far grander. Armies that were not fragmented, half-trained, wounded and exhausted. But Light help him, he had never been so proud.

...

This was the moment he had been seeking. It was the card upon which to bet everything he had. Ten to one odds, still, but the Sharan army, the Trollocs and the Fades had no head. No general to guide them.

...

Elayne’s death had been a lie. Her troops had been in disarray - they had lost more than a third of their soldiers - but just as they were about to be routed by the Trollocs, she rode into their midst and rallied them.

20.  Catching up with Moggy! Hi, Moghedien. I bet your Last Battle is going pretty shitty. She kicks Demandred’s abandoned corpse. Oh, his devoted Shendla just left his body there to rot? Yikes. For Moghedien, she discovers that now that so many of the Chosen have been killed off, TDO is ready to let her have a taste of that sweet sweet True Power.

She disguises herself as Demandred and heads to the Sharan forces. I have to admit, given how open Min has been about her Talents, it’s kinda astonishing that Moghedien doesn’t know about her viewings. Min will tell anyone who stands still for five seconds, plus Tuon announced her as a Doomseer and has been plumping her up for the past whatever-number of chapters.

Moghedien starts to gear up for her role as Fake Demandred...

...and then she gets a blast of cannon/dragon-fire in her face from the Band’s part of Mat’s plan.

21. Instead of the Band leaving their caves to fight; channelers are opening them up brief windows to shoot through. Aludra is placed up on a high location with a spy-glass, giving orders to the channelers for the next locations for the booms. Honestly very clever.

22. As Aviendha fights in the valley, plants grow to cover her passage.

They had come right when she had needed them to hide her approach. Happenstance? She chose to believe otherwise. She could feel [Rand], in the back of her mind. He fought, a true warrior. His battle lent her strength, and she tried to return the same.

Determination. Honor. Glory. Fight on, shade of my heart. Fight on.

😍 😍 😍 😍 😍 😍 😍 😍 

23. Aviendha kills a Compelled attacker, only realizing it’s Rhuarc after she has struck the fatal blow. She kills him moments before he would have killed her, and only her shoulder gets injured.

She does her best to convince herself that she only killed a shell. That Rhuarc was already dead.

There is a burst of determination from Rand (Strength, Aviendha) and her fatigue leaves her, and she refocuses on the fight.

24. Aviendha studies Graendal and decides on her approach -- she creates a spear made out of fire and light, and some other weaves in reserve -- and charges for Graendal. See, this makes a lot more sense that Elayne randomly having a sword, because this is a weapon and Aviendha knows and has trained in most of her life. I think that Sanderson Just Likes Swords tbh.

I really love the description here because of how it brings back Aviendha’s Maiden roots as she launches her attack on Graendal. The ground explodes underneath her (her legs get pretty destroyed, it sounds like), but she’s leaping up already aimed like a spear herself, and she sinks the spear into Graendal’s side just as Graendal is using the True Power to Travel... and because they’re touching, she goes along with Graendal when she Travels.

25. Mat rides with the Heroes of the Horn. He gets them to confirm that he isn’t one of them. He can see Elayne from where he is.

Mat saw Elayne’s banner glowing above them in the sky, crafted of the One Power, and caught a glimpse of someone who looked like her riding among the soldiers, hair glowing as if lit from behind her. She seemed a bloody Hero of the Horn herself.

26. And then the great battle is over, at least here on the battlefield.

He would have to thank Tuon for returning. He did not go looking for her, though. He had a feeling she would expect him to perform his princely duties, whatever they might be.

Hmm.

27. He does feel that tugging. Rand needs him. He tries to convince himself that this was his part, out here, and whatever is going on where Rand is... that’s Rand’s business. The dice are still tumbling in his head. This part here manages to capture Mat’s double-think in a way that I didn’t feel like came across in the actual chapter when we had the Rand & Mat reunion.

After trying to talk himself out of it, Mat ends up saying that he’s a fool because “I need to go to Rand.”

As a parting note, he asks Hawkwing to go have a conversation with “their Empress” (Tuon), and hmm, interesting. Okay, I need to break this down a bit.

So, one of the things that gave Tuon the big jollies back in the negotiation chapter with Rand was Mat referring to the Seanchan forces as “our forces”, which she basically interpreted as “haha you’re mine now, no take-backs”. And here, he does not call the Seanchan empress “my” Empress. He says she’s “their” Empress. The Empress of the Seanchan, who he is not currently identifying with, it would seem. So. That’s interesting.

We don’t get to see the conversation between Hawkwing and Tuon, of course, but what would Mat assume about what Hawkwing would tell Tuon? Why would Mat send Hawkwing to talk to her? The Heroes of the Horn follow Rand, pretty explicitly. They literally just recently scolded Mat for not appreciating Rand enough. They are aware of current events in the world and of the Seanchan Empire.

Which is to say... of course, Mat is assuming that Hawkwing will try to set Tuon straight on how to be an Empress without abusing millions of people under her power. Hawkwing told him that they would never fight for the Shadow. I think it’s reasonable for Mat to assume that he would disapprove of slavery. And Hawkwing’s hatred of Aes Sedai in his lifetime was canonically influenced by Ishamael, if I recall correctly, so the idea that Ishamael’s corruption is still influencing him in his Horn-form just seems like kinda silly to me. So. That’s my stance on that. Mat has clearly stated in recent chapters that he disapproves of the damane system, in particular, and that he wants to influence Tuon to soften her stance on Aes Sedai. So we know what Mat’s motivations are in sending Hawkwing off to talk to her. And it kinda fits Mat’s pattern of trying to use other people to influence Tuon to be less awful.

28. Rand has thought about Mat often, here in the battle with TDO. He thinks of him again -- Beneath them, on the battlefield, the Trollocs had fallen, beaten by a young gambler from the Two Rivers.

29. Oh, hey, Perrin just woke up. Page 853. He went to sleep on page 670. Nice long nap. Missed... a lot of stuff.

He learns that the battle at Merrilor has been won, but the battle at Thakan’dar, outside of Shayol Ghul, rages on. He gets his exhaustion washed away by one of the Aes Sedai and goes physically back into TAR (where he left Gaul to guard the cave where Rand fights).

30. In the waking world, Thom is the one guarding that cave entrance and he ponders the various ways that the ending of the world can be turned into a song, once this is all over.

31. Mat goes to Grady and tells him that he needs to be taken to Shayol Ghul. He’s brought Rand’s banner with him. Hanging out with Grady are Olver and Noal. The dice are still tumbling in Mat’s head. As far as I can tell, they haven’t stopped since Elayne asked him if he knew what he was doing.

Mat, on thinking about Noal/Jain becoming a Hero of the Horn:

Well, you wouldn’t find Mat trading places with him. Noal might enjoy it, but Mat wouldn’t dance at another man’s command. Not for immortality itself, no he wouldn’t.

Another data point that I’m placing into the pile.

Grady says that Traveling is wonky in that direction. Can’t be done.

Mat won’t accept that as an answer, and he gets Grady to take him (and Olver) as close as they can get -- a Seanchan scouting camp, a day away.

32. lol, we get a tiny glimpse into Fain the mist god-demon here. This just feels so anti-climatic, to still have Fain around at a time like this. Anyway, he’s basically a walking Shadar Logoth at this point. Fain kinda suffers from the same issues as Slayer, in that it feels like he’s a villain that the story grew past and yet he hung around anyway.

33. Gaul has been standing alone against Slayer all this time in TAR, fighting against him and protecting Rand, on his own, while Perrin was taking his restorative nap. But now Perrin is back to help. On the plus side, because of the time dilation stuff, only two hours has passed for Gaul in here.

34. Since he couldn’t take a gateway to Shayol Ghul, Mat is going by dragon to’raken. And, yes, Mat takes time out of his terror at being up so high to notice how pretty the morat’to’raken is, even as he thinks that anyone willing to do this must be “completely insane”. Olver, who is riding with them, is having a great time, though.

From up high, Mat sees a mist covering the valley below and gets a tingling that tells him... it’s about Fain and the dagger.

35. Then their to’raken gets hit by arrows, killing the rider or knocking her out. Mat undoes his straps and climbs over to take the to’raken’s reins. So he’s... he’s riding the closest thing that this world has to a dragon. Subtext, fun for the whole family.

He does his best to give them a gentle landing. It is not terribly gentle.

36. In the aftermath of the crash, Mat thinks that kidnapping Tuon (aka marrying her) is the worst decision that he’s ever made. Hmm. And this is after she ‘returned’ to the battlefield per their plan.

“That,” [Mat] finally groaned, “is the worst bloody idea I’ve ever had.” He hesitated. “Maybe the second worst.” He had decided to kidnap Tuon, after all.

And he doesn’t undercut that thought with any kind of caveat. He just lets it stand as he moves on to the next thing. Another interesting data point.

37. Mat literally panics when he realizes that Rand’s banner has gone missing during their dragon to’raken flight. Why does it seem like Sanderson is so much better at writing Cauthor-related scenes when Mat and Rand are separated from each other?

Olver points out that the swirling clouds above them are forming Rand’s sign, and then he blows the Horn again, for good measure.

38. Rand breaks out of his frozen battle with TDO and re-enters his own body. “From his watching of the Pattern, he knew that although only minutes had passed here since he’d entered, in the valley outside this cavern, days had passed, and farther out into the world, it had been much longer.”

He points Callandor at Moridin, and Moridin promptly throws a knife at Alanna.

Broke back to consciousness by Nynaeve’s herbs, Alanna pulls herself together long enough to release the bond she forced on Rand before she dies.

...I kinda feel the need to point out that Moiraine has done nothing but be a battery for Rand since she entered the cave with him.

I also feel bad for Alanna, who really disappeared from the story once Min was bonded to Rand and could take over as Cadsuane’s Rand mood-ring, and now is only here so that she can die. I have extremely large beef against Alanna for forcibly bonding Rand but it feels like the story really should have used that beat even more than it did, rather than it disappearing after WH.

39. Perrin kills Slayer. Finally. And then he pulls back out of TAR and is “on the rocks in the valley of Thakan’dar”, near where the Aiel are gathered.

40. Mat leaves Olver with the Heroes and meets up with Perrin at the mouth of the cave. So, yes, Mat and Perrin get another reunion. Why does Perrin! Get all the reunions! This is what I was talking about when I said how annoyed I was that Mat thinking about Rand tugging on him wouldn’t end up with any good payoff. All we get is yet another Mat and Perrin reunion.

That Rand is literally inside that cave and yet the three ta’veren do not reunite here is honestly somewhat infuriating for me. Genuinely those two things: the Emond’s Five reunite and the ta’veren three reunite should have been at the TOP of Sanderson’s priority list! There is a lot that I have enjoyed about AMoL but there are just way too many important emotional moments that were either skipped or didn’t happen at all but should have happened.

And, fuck, letting Mat and Rand have a scene that doesn’t take place during Mat’s weird Ebou Dar adventure. That would have been nice! Once Mat decides that he’s not going to be a lapdog for the Seanchan/Tuon anymore, his storyline and his PoV get so much better and so much more enjoyable and I am just... eternal bitterness that our only Mat & Rand reunion was plopped into our most lapdoggy-Mat era.

Mat came here specifically to protect Rand and then he never sees him! That is just fucking awful. They deserved a better reunion. What was the point of having the Heroes scold Mat if we didn’t actually get to see Mat and Rand interact again after it? This is kinda a place where the epilogue is mostly at fault -- Mat just strolling off to plan a fireworks show for Tuon post-Last Battle conflicts pretty hard with him spending time with his dying best friend, tonally-speaking -- but that really just makes it all the more frustrating that the only Cauthor reunion took place when Mat was in his worst Seanchan-era.

41. Aviendha attacks Graendal with an exploding gateway; and Mat kills Fain/Mordeth/etc.

And Perrin almost takes off to go searching for Faile but manages to resist the urge: If Rand died, then he would lose Faile. And everything else.

Yes. I have tried to yell this at the fictional characters so many times: if the world dies, then so does your sweetheart! It’s nice that Perrin finally listened.

42. And for his final trick, Moridin grabs Callandor, and Moiraine and Nynaeve spring their trap, using the flaw in Callandor to take control of the ‘circle’ that Moridin has accidentally formed with them. With Moridin having pulled the True Power, Rand is now able to enter the link, and Moiraine and Nynaeve can feed him all three sets of Power: saidar, saidin, and the True Power. Light explodes from him, and from Shayol Ghul, as Rand uses the True Power to protect himself as he reaches through the Bore and grabs onto the Dark One.

43. We get a quick beat of people reacting to the light:

Elayne is on the battlefield of Merrilor, as they search for the living among the dead. She feels the “swelling of power in Rand” and her attention focuses on him.

Thom shields his eyes as the light bursts from the entrance to the Pit of Doom.

Min appears to have managed to get away from the Seanchan for now, changing linens for the wounded, perhaps also on the Field of Merrilor.

Aviendha is drawn back from the darkness of near-death by the light and the warmth of Rand inside her, and realizes that her explosion twisted the compulsion weave so that Graendal compelled herself to worship Aviendha. Awkward!

Logain sees the light and knows that it’s what was meant by the message that Egwene sent, and he breaks the seals on the Dark One’s prison.

44. In TAR, Perrin runs across Lanfear. Together, they walk into Shayol Ghul, and we learn that she apparently compelled Perrin a little while ago? He’s able to pull out of it by reminding himself of his duty and of Faile, and he snaps her neck, killing her.

*squints at the scene*

Yeah, I mean. That’s certainly still what looks like happened? Sorry, Sanderson, I’m not seeing your hints here about Lanfear tricking Perrin and surviving.

45. Rand holds the Dark One in his hand. Or the representation of his hand. And, once again, when Rand tells TDO how pitiful he is, all I see are echoes of the Seanchan:

You would have enslaved me as you would have enslaved the others. You cannot give oblivion. Rest is not yours. Only torment.

Rand can feel himself dying, his life blood slipping away. Realizing that the world that he’d seen without the Dark One would have been the truth, he knows that he cannot kill it. So he thrusts TDO back into his prison, braids saidar and saidin together to reforge a new shield onto the Bore.

With this new form of the Power, Rand pulled together the rent that had been made here long ago by foolish men.

He understood, finally, that the Dark One was not the enemy.

It never had been.

(because it only reflected the evil that people were already capable of)

46. The black hole inside the cave expands, as Moiraine and Nynaeve run for the safety of the cave entrance.

47. And now we are at the epilogue.

Much like I did with The Last Battle chapter, I’ll take the epilogue in sections by character. Rand & co will go last, this time.

Perrin

The spirits of the dead wolves fade back into the dream. Perrin voluntarily worries about Rand? Wow, that feels kinda out of character for Perrin, who has always been way better at pushing away thoughts of Rand than Mat has been, but I guess let’s go with it. It seems to exist to tell us that Perrin no longer sees color swirls and no longer feels any tugging towards anything. “Those seemed like very bad signs.”

“Have you sent for the three?”

What a weird way to ask “do Rand’s girlfriends know that he’s dying?”

I’m going to take a minute and count up the PoV & page counts everyone gets in the epilogue.

Rand: 3 PoVs (4 pages total)

Mat: 2 PoVs (1 1/5 pages)

Perrin: 3 PoVs (6 1/5 pages)

Loial: 1 PoV (3 pages)

Moghedien: 1 PoV (1 page)

Nynaeve: 1 PoV (2 pages)

Birgitte: 1 PoV (1 page)

Tam: 1 PoV (1 page)

Min: 1 PoV (1/2 page)

Cadsuane: 1 PoV (1 page)

That’s a lot of Perrin, comparatively-speaking.

Anyway, Perrin finds Faile, happy ending, etc.

...oh, I just looked it up and Sanderson answered some questions about the epilogue (tor[dot]com/2013/01/23/brandon-sandersons-wheel-of-time-answers-from-torchat/)! He added Perrin’s and Loial’s scene(s). Ha! I knew that Loial was a Sanderson addition because he uses “Matrim” instead of Mat (that is, imo, by far the easiest ‘tell’ of a Sanderson scene -- someone using ‘Matrim’ when they normally wouldn’t). And the Perrin scenes make sense too because it really builds off of and finishes the narrative thread that was at play earlier in the book for Perrin, which was presumably all written by Sanderson.

Mat

Mat strolls away from the aftermath of having killed Padan Fain, calling the dagger “a gamble I don’t want to touch”. The dice stop rolling in Mat’s head after he decides not to pick up the dagger. Hmm. Mat avoiding becoming the new Fain for the Fourth Age?

After that, we skip to his scene with Tuon. And there are only those two scenes with Mat in the epilogue -- killing Fain and finding out that he’s been baby-trapped into the Seanchan Empire. Though Perrin confirms in his own PoV scenes that he no longer gets the swirls or the tugging, we don’t get the same kind of confirmation in Mat’s (very short) scenes.

I will say that there is more subtlety in Mat’s ending here than I had remembered -- I was extremely unhappy about his ending but this marriage is pretty troubled already in the text, and so it’s not really the book that tries to pretend this is a happy “babies ever after” ending for Mat; I feel like that’s maybe more of a vibe that I got from fans at the time, rather than from the text. There are a lot of “male power fantasy” fans who just really like that Mat ends up married to an Empress and commanding vast armies, I think, at least from what I’ve seen around the internet (and especially back when the series was originally published).

And Mat specifically forces a grin at the news that Fortuona is pregnant, so he’s not genuinely happy about it (and we got things in recent chapters like Mat thinking that kidnapping Tuon was the worst idea he’d ever had).

But, honestly, I do still hate that it happens. I hate it up one side and down the other. It sucks as an ending for Mat so much. Miserable marriage, awful wife, horrible shackles tying him to a terrible fascist empire built on slavery.

That being said... just Tuon’s rule is incredibly fragile, this marriage is also incredibly fragile (which is probably why Jordan slapped a baby in there to begin with -- otherwise, given his general misery level in many of the Seanchan-related scenes, it’s difficult to see how Mat could bring himself to stick with Tuon for long enough to do whatever plot-related things Jordan was imagining would have happened in the outriggers -- the baby is a trap for Mat, not from Tuon but from Jordan).

There are still so many things about the Seanchan that could end up being deal-breakers for Mat if he finds out about them!

(ex. Bodewhin Cauthon is never mentioned in the books after Knife of Dreams, so it is entirely possible that she is among the new damane who were taken by the Seanchan in recent days, and Mat might end up seeing his sister with a collar around her neck post-canon. How would he react to that? And to Tuon’s unwillingness to let her go?)

In addition to Mat potentially seeing people he knows and cares about in collars, we also have the possibility of him learning just how brutal Tuon’s attack against the White Tower was (there isn’t any indication that he knows about the attack at all yet); or Talmanes telling him about Verin’s letter and Mat realizing how damaging his fear of Aes Sedai has been for the world; or further in the future there’s Mat’s potential reaction to the lethal political wrangling that Imperial heirs are meant to get up to (he was disturbed enough that Galgan liking him only means that subpar assassins will be sent against him -- when he realizes that Tuon might well encourage their own kids to kill each other to win her favor, it’s very hard to see him brushing that off). Plus he’s regained his sense of disgust over the damane system. So there are a lot of powderkegs waiting to be blown sky-high for Mat, post-canon.

idk, Mat’s storyline is maybe the one where I most have to untangle whether I dislike it more because I feel like it was executed poorly or if I dislike it because it sets up a situation that will never get resolution. And how connected are those things?

A big frustration that I’ve had with how Jordan and then Sanderson handled Mat’s storyline over the course of the last few books of the series was how many shortcuts were taken with his character and how artificial forcing him into the Seanchans’ arms has felt to me.

a. Mat getting trapped in Ebou Dar and then all the characters involved taking a vow of silence when it came to telling Rand about it. Mat getting trapped in Ebou Dar is plot nonsense: relatively forgivable. But having multiple characters being given the opportunity to change that situation and just... not bothering to do it is... that’s a characterization issue. It severely impacted my feelings about Nynaeve for Jordan to turn her into the kind of person who just doesn’t bother to tell Rand that his best friend was left behind in that kind of perilous situation. Plot manipulations... that’s just how the plot works. But over and over, characters got broken or bent for the purpose of jamming Mat into the Seanchan storyline.

b. Setalle Anan is a minor character, so I get why people don’t care about her, but she’s a character who pretty much completely reverses her characterization between WH & CoT (in WH, she is anti-slavery and finds Mat charming and trustworthy; in CoT & KoD, she protects and waits on Tuon while treating Mat like the dangerous one, including betraying Mat’s secrets to Tuon -- and her betrayals are never acknowledged by the text in any way; she just keeps on being treated as if she’s a friendly supporting character) and, from what I could see, it’s just so obviously done in order to protect Tuon from ever having even a sliver of character growth rather than it making sense for Setalle Anan’s character.

c. We keep tiptoeing up to the brink of Actually Having A Plot Happen with the Seanchan and then backing away at the last minute without really having a good reason to do it. Incredibly frustrating. This was one of my main annoyances with CoT & KoD. And in AMoL, both Rand and Egwene inexplicably back down when they have Tuon on the ropes and off-balance.

d. Mat’s teleportation to Ebou Dar in-between Towers of Midnight and A Memory of Light. I’ve talked about this one a lot but yeah. It’s just... really bad? I do suspect that Sanderson couldn’t figure out any way to actually make it believable that Mat would go to the Seanchan and that’s why he had it all happen off-the-page. But the careless damage that it does to Mat’s characterization is just horrific. Mat gets ripped out of the action of the first third of the book, and doesn’t get to the Last Battle itself until the book is more than half over. Once Mat is actually engaging in the Last Battle, his characterization steadies a lot but especially those first four chapters with Mat, it feels like we’re only working with half of his characterization and the other half has vanished somewhere in-between ToM & AMoL.

(and if Mat hadn’t been cut-and-pasted from the Tower of Ghenjei over to Ebou Dar, then we would have had a full reunion at Merrilor. So I’m annoyed/bitter about that too)

I could keep going but... let’s keep it at four issues for right now so that we’re not here all day, lol.

All of those issues are problems that I had with the execution of the storyline.

I am not inherently opposed to depressing endings for characters that I love but... it has to be done well. It has to make sense. And Mat’s ending just... required cutting away too many parts of him (and other characters) for it to make sense to me.

But though it is not always handled well (to put it mildly), Mat’s storyline with Tuon (and Tylin before her) is an example of the ‘typical gender roles are swapped’ done in a way that is more down to the very core of his storyline than a lot of other storylines, which are more on the surface.

He’s much less politically powerful than his spouse and needs to use guile, intrigue, and manipulation to get his way and try to persuade her to a gentler and kinder path than her warlike nature naturally aligns towards.

He undergoes something of a gender-swapped version of “The Taming of the Shrew” storyline, in which a fiercely independent person gets coerced/’tamed’ into being a properly submissive spouse (or, depending on your interpretation, into pretending to be one) -- many of the tricks that Tuon and Tylin use are similar to what Petruchio does to Katherine in the play. Mat gets publicly humiliated and starved by Tylin into submitting to her (which is what Petruchio does to Katherine during/after their wedding), and isolated away from his past connections during his time with Tuon, where he constantly has to act to try to figure out how to appease her without provoking her temper (Petruchio compares taming Katherine to falcon-taming, but Tuon would probably compare it to horse-training or damane-breaking), and Petruchio changes her name from ‘Katherine’ to ‘Kate’, which fits pretty well with Tuon’s insistence on never once calling Mat ‘Mat’.

Plus Mat getting his name changed to indicate that he now ‘belongs’ to Tuon’s people fits into this general category --  and historically, in the culture that Jordan belonged to, that’s normally a role given to women, to be given a new name that shows that they are now of their husband’s people and not their father’s; it’s usually their last name but, in the not too-distant past (and maybe currently in some places as well, idk), at least in the USA, women were often referred to as Mrs. “husband’s first name” “husband’s last name” with none of their own name making it into the address.

But a lot of the issues that I have with how this was written is that it felt like Mat was behaving like his hand was forced even when it wasn’t. Which is definitely a writing issue -- it’s a similar issue to the one that I have with the Rand & Min romance, for example, where Min desperately chases after something even though she doesn’t really want it at the start. Prophecy gets used as a way to skip actually writing important character or relationship beats, instead of prophecy being one of many tools in the writer’s kit.

So, yeah, it really is the execution of the storyline that is the biggest problem for me with Mat & Tuon, and the way it feels like he is pulled away from his other attachments whether or not that makes any narrative or character sense.

I really hope that the show does better with them, and with Mat in his endgame (should we get there, etc.).

I will say that I do think that Sanderson handled the romance better than Jordan did; the main problem was that it was already fundamentally broken by how the relationship was written in CoT & KoD, imo (the KoD collaring chapter in particular made me despise them as a pairing and my feelings never recovered from that moment). But in Sanderson’s books, we actually see the effects of Tuon compromising with Mat during various points of the Last Battle (though we see don’t actually see their private discussions and/or arguments that lead to those compromises), and there’s always a throughline showing how miserable the Seanchan lifestyle is for Mat, and those are two things that were majorly missing from CoT & KoD for me, but that make sense as the only way to make the romance even half-believable for Mat’s pre-established characterization from WH and earlier.

The three big issues that I have with Sanderson’s Mat are: the terrible first chapter of TGS (with the gross sexism); the terrible first chapter of AMoL (now featuring inexplicable teleportation); and the deep deep disservice done to Mat and Rand’s friendship (Rand got a personal goodbye with EVERYONE important to him EXCEPT Mat! And Mat got a personal reunion with everyone important to him, except Rand! All they got was the negotiation scene that was ultimately all about Fortuona and the Seanchan treaty, with Mat and Rand’s friendship being the set dressing around the scene).

But the relationship with Tuon honestly... makes a lot more sense in this book than it did in CoT & KoD (once we work past the brain-breaking logistics of the first chapter or so). There are TONS of hints that Mat has uncomfortable vibes going on underneath his casual exterior, plus Tuon actually does make some attempts at compromising with him, and if the well hadn’t been poisoned by how much I despised CoT/KoD-era Mat & Tuon then... I might have had a chance at enjoying AMoL-era Mat & Tuon for the toxic trainwreck that it is.

But, like all the characters & relationships in AMoL, we skip some pretty big moments in the Mat & Tuon relationship -- we see the effects of them compromising but we never actually see them coming to that compromise in private, which I feel like we needed after how unyielding and frankly how annoying Jordan made Tuon about everything.

We do end up with a Mat & a ‘Fortuona’ who remain at cross-purposes -- Mat continues to think of and refer to her as ‘Tuon’ while Fortuona has kinda reversed from thinking of him as a ‘buffoon’ to instead believing that he has the same kind of practical motivations behind his choices that she does, which is also not accurate. But Sanderson did add in some actual give-and-take to their relationship, which Jordan never seemed willing to do, so the AMoL-era Mat & Tuon is a lot more genuinely engaging for me, even if I do still think that they are one of the most obviously doomed fictional marriages that I have ever seen.

Final Mat-related question for the moment: the Seanchan Empire is based on authoritarian governments throughout history, so does how the Seanchan Empire operates mimic the behavior of a cult?

The popular model for cults is the BITE model, which was developed by a man who was deprogrammed from the Moon cult in 1976 (Steve Hassan). It’s an acronym:

Behavior, Information, Thought, and Emotion control. BITE.

Do the Seanchan seek to control people’s behavior? (yes) Do they seek to control the flow of information that the people under them learn? (yes) Do they seek to have their members reject critical thought and only apply to the group-think? (yes)  Do they manipulate the emotions of their followers, usually instilling fear or paranoia about outsiders? (yes)

We know from earlier books that the Seanchan culture =/= the Seanchan Empire. There are constant civil wars and uprisings in their native land. This is explicitly why they are such good soldiers, because they are always fighting each other. Yet they present themselves as a monolith when they come to the Westlands, bragging about how they’re here to bring ‘order’ to a lawless continent. What they say about themselves does not match the truth of what else we know about them.

How does the Seanchan Empire exercise its control over its people? Everything I included here is something I think we’ve see the Empire do, but I did bold ones that are particularly blatant in the text.

Behavior control: Control types of clothing and hairstyles; permission required for major decisions; rewards and punishments used to modify behaviors both positive and negative; discourage individualism; encourage group-think; impose rigid rules and regulations; punish disobedience by beating, torture, burning, cutting, rape, or tattooing/branding; threaten harm to family and friends; encourage and engage in corporal punishment; instill dependency and obedience; kidnapping; beating; torture; murder

Information control: Distort information to make it more acceptable; systematically lie to the cult members; minimize or discourage access to non-cult sources of information; ensure that information is not freely accessible; control information at different levels and missions within group; allow only leadership to decide who needs to know what and when; encourage spying on other members; impose a buddy system to monitor and control member; report deviant thoughts, feelings, and actions to leadership; ensure that individual behavior is monitored by group; extensive use of cult-generated propaganda

Thought control: require members to internalize the group’s doctrine as truth; adopting the group’s ‘map of reality’ as reality; instill black and white thinking; organize people into us vs them; change person’s name and identity; use of loaded language and cliches which constrict knowledge; encourage only ‘good and proper’ thoughts; thought-stopping techniques to shut down reality testing: denial, rationalization, justification, wishful thinking; rejection of rational analysis, critical thinking, constructive criticism; forbid critical questions about leader, doctrine, or policy; labeling alternative belief systems as illegitimate, evil, or not useful

Emotion control: teach emotion-stopping techniques to block feelings of homesickness, anger, doubt; make the person feel that problems are always their own fault, never the leader’s or the group’s fault; promote feelings of guilt or unworthiness; instill fear, such as fear of: thinking independently, the outside world, leaving or being shunned by the group; ritualistic and sometimes public confessions of sins; phobia indoctrination: inculcating irrational fears about leaving the group or questioning the leader’s authority, no happiness or fulfillment possible outside of group; shunning of those who leave; being told there is never a legitimate reason to leave.

“Destructive mind control can be determined when the overall effect of these four components promotes dependency and obedience to some leader or cause; it is not necessary for every single item on the list to be present.“ (in this case, that would be to the Empress, ~may she live forever~)

(all taken from freedomofmind(dot)com -- not linking because sometimes outside links make tumblr act weird about posts)

On the page, we witness the slow process of Leilwin née Egeanin pulling away and deprogramming from the Seanchan Empire, and then in this book, it feels like Mat has begun that process as well. And it feels like they started the same way -- because of a massive overreach by Tuon, the leader of the cult/Empire. Leilwin née Egeanin gets humiliated and punished by Tuon for no reason; just because Tuon felt like being a brat that day, and that moment of humiliation -- the re-naming and the forcing of the jewelry on her in a way that treated her like a slave -- was really what made Leilwin née Egeanin start to pull away from the other Seanchan and go into the path that eventually led to her being, however briefly, Egwene’s Warder.

For Mat, it really seems like whatever happened in that ‘not pleasant’ discussion that he and Tuon had after she berated him for, essentially, prioritizing Egwene’s privacy over Tuon’s desire to get information from him... that discussion (that we didn’t get to see) really seemed to lead to the more combative Mat who refused to back down and roll over for her. Mat still feels a level of protectiveness and affection for Tuon through the rest of the book but he stops letting her push him around and he starts acting like he cares about doing something about the slavery system in the Seanchan Empire again, which was a part of him that we lost at the start of CoT and I have hated so much that we lost in his character. But it slowly grows back over the course of the second half of AMoL.

Again, my big regret here is that the Mat & Rand reunion happened before Mat started his spine regrowth program. Even though Mat does start to push back on Tuon more here, he still never finished several of his character arcs that were set up over the course of the entire series: namely his own mistrust of Aes Sedai and his fear of Rand as a channeler. Both of those fears were things that he was actively working in the text and that he abruptly backtracked on when Tuon was introduced into his life (because being chill with channelers and being chill with people who enslave channelers is contradictory and so Jordan decided... to go with being chill with slavers). So those are two flapping loose ends for his character at the end of this series that never got to fully be addressed because the ‘romance’ was prioritized over Mat’s characterization.

Loial

Loial is looking for people to help him with accounts for his book and “Perrin ignored me and Mat cannot be found”.

Mat just completely disappearing from the Westlands side of things to go set up a fireworks show for Tuon (and asking Aludra to be the one to set it up, which just seems kinda mean, considering that the Seanchan pretty much completely eliminated the Illuminators) is just... frustrating. Apparently Mat visited the battlefield here “smiling and healthy” but then vanished. So, in theory, there’s an empty place here where Mat might have visited Rand and talked to Elayne & co one last time, since Rand is in the main healing tent on this battlefield.

Loial also notes how odd it is that Elayne and Min don’t seem to feel any urge to go in to hold Rand’s hand while he’s dying (Aviendha is getting her legs looked at). I know, Loial! They’re the worst fake-grievers who ever lived, I swear. If the whole point is to trick people into thinking Rand is dead, then it might be a good idea to... actually try to trick people?

Moghedien

In which Tuon’s people are already breaking the terms of the treaty by snatching up channelers from the battlefield at Merrilor. No hundred years of peace, Rand. I’m sorry.

Rand (& all those who say ‘goodbye’ to him, or who don’t)

Rand leaves the mountain, slipping on his own blood and carrying a body. Shayol Ghul is trying to close before he can leave and he only barely makes it out in time before the cave snaps shut behind him.

Moiraine tells Rand that he did well, and Nynaeve tries desperately to keep him alive, but eventually, and without ever waking back up, ‘Rand’ dies.

Elayne, Aviendha, and Min do the absolute worst job of playing grieving widows ever. Like, if Rand had actually died, I could understand this better. Because they might really be in shock. But they know he’s alive! And their whole job is to convince people that they absolutely believe that he’s dead! Just... pinch your arm until you start crying! This is literally the most suspicious way that they could have gone about things -- Nynaeve is already extremely suspicious of how they’re acting. Seriously, she’s gonna wiggle the truth out of them pretty much five seconds post-epilogue.

Birgitte comes to say goodbye to Elayne because she’s about to be reborn... and to mention that she’s tossed away the Horn of Valere. Sure hope that Elayne doesn’t regret that in ten years when they’re at war with the Seanchan!

Tam hopes that now his son can get some rest. My hope is that Rand will, you know, go and talk to his dad after he’s had a chance to recover from the stress and trauma of the Last Battle. Also, Tam... you’re gonna have grandkids. No thoughts on that, I see. Still no thoughts on that.

The funeral scene frustrates me to pieces.

Honestly, the most frustrating thing about the funeral scene is how easy it would have been to casually mention that Mat and Perrin were there? Like, that’s ONE SENTENCE. Just... the erasure of those years of friendship, because heterosexual marriage, in Jordan’s fictional world, meant that close male-male friendships just stopped existing. It’s depressing. That CADSUANE is considered to have more right to be at Rand’s funeral than his childhood friends who were also vital parts of the Last Battle. It’s insulting. And apparently Tam organized it? But he couldn’t be bothered to invite his kid’s best friends. Definitely a place where Sanderson should have done some editing of the original epilogue. One sentence is all that was needed.

*sigh*

I do think that Sanderson did try to set up why Mat wouldn’t have gone -- we have seen Mat, in several of his recent PoV scenes, swallowing his grief over losing people he loves and not letting it appear to affect him openly, even as it rocked him deeply, so Rand’s death would be another of those gut-punches that he would do his best to pretend didn’t happen. But, fuck... it just sucks that the friendship between Mat and Rand is such a sublimated thing in this last book, when Rand and Mat both got to much more openly deal with pretty much every other important relationship that they had (though I will note that Rand and Sulin never got a reunion either! Rude!).

Perrin didn’t get anything like that kind of subtextual explanation, but Perrin actually did visit Rand’s healing tent while he was dying, so at least he got that much. *shrugs*

Min thinking here about how the assembled people expect a ‘show’ of grief -- yes, they have all found it exceedingly odd that none of you appear to be grieving the man you said that you loved.

Rand wakes up in his new body, washed clean of the wounds that he’d taken over the course of the series. No more missing hand; no more agonizing pain in his side. 

I have to admit “she left me some money” feels like a pretty anti-climatic way for Alivia to “help Rand die”? She wasn’t really involved in his “death” at all -- it was really Moiraine and Nynaeve who were the ones who ‘helped’ him die. I mean, any one of Min, Elayne, or Aviendha could have left him some money, since they all know he’s alive. I wonder if Jordan was originally thinking that Alivia would be the one joining Rand & Nynaeve for the cave journey, and it was Sanderson who decided that Moiraine would be more appropriate? Nothing distinctively Moiraine happens in that cave, not the way that Nynaeve was needed to be there to heal Alanna without using the Power. Like, this poor woman was harassed by Min for a handful of books because of that prophecy and all she did was leave Rand some money! Min better find her and apologize to her! (I already know that she won’t)

Haha, so confession: my brain edited out that new!Rand had lost saidin. My brain was just like “nope, of course he can still channel”. Personally, I’m not a huge fan of Rand not being a channeler at the end of the story, so that part I’m not thrilled about. He does have his newfound ability to use the threads of reality to basically channel anyway, though. Or at least I assume that’s what the pipe scene is about.

And then his thought, too, about ‘which’ of the women will follow him - yeah, you’re right that thinking that means you’ve gotten a swollen head! They all have responsibilities! Though since Rand leaves so abruptly here, there’s a lot that he doesn’t know, and the two things that most affect this specific question are: the extent of Aviendha’s injuries and the extent of Min’s involvement with the Seanchan. Literally zero of them is in a position to go chasing after Rand, even if they wanted to! Rand is the one who has no obligations and can easily visit them if he wants (well, maybe not ‘easily’ if Min does end up in the Empire).

But I can still remember, wow, what a relief it was that he was alive at the end, and free and unbound. The rest can be... adjusted by post-canon theories.

In terms of ‘things that aren’t covered but that we can probably assume’:

It does look like Elayne ended up with all three of the medallion copies -- the one Mellar used on her, the one that was on Birgitte’s body, and the third was with Lan and she probably reclaimed it (there’s nothing to indicate that Mat spoke with Lan and got it back), so the slaver empress never gets that medallion that Mat wanted to give her back in ToM. Tragic.

Despite Elayne and Tam speaking frequently over the course of AMoL, they somehow never speak about the whole grandkids issue. I feel like we can assume that this happens at some point, post-epilogue? Elayne and Aviendha both seem like they would go back to Caemlyn to rebuild. And Tam doesn’t really have a reason to go back to the Two Rivers at this point, so I can see him ending in Caemlyn too because: grandkids.

Technically, Min has slipped the Seanchan net at this point and could just not go back if she wants, so she can either go back to the Seanchan or she could go to Caemlyn with Elayne & Aviendha, but if she does stay away from the Seanchan, Tuon is going to try to get her back. Unless she was super-turned off by Min actually standing up to her in front of all the Blood and hastily makes Selucia her Truthspeaker again. That’s another possibility.

Ah, since we were told earlier that Melaine was about ready to give birth and Birgitte tells Elayne that she’s about to be reborn: Melaine might be her mom. I feel like Birgitte being reborn as Aiel sounds kinda fun.

I feel like Rand would not actually enjoy traveling all on his own after a while, given what we know about him, so he would probably end up visiting Caemlyn. And given how suspicious Nynaeve already is in the epilogue, I’m going to guess that she knows the truth by the time Rand goes to Caemlyn.

If Mat decides to leave the Seanchan behind at any point, he will probably also go to Caemlyn, and Mat and Rand can finally have a good reunion.

All in all, there are things about the ending that don’t thrill me but there are also things I really like. And having an ending at all helps in terms of sparking the imagination for fanfiction or meta or... an Amazon Prime television series. I don’t think we would have ever gotten the series if the books had stayed unfinished.

The epilogue checklist (and my theories about how it affected AMoL)

So, while reading AMoL, it felt like Sanderson took a couple of shortcuts in order to bruteforce the characters into reaching their epilogue endpoints, because there simply wasn’t enough time for it to happen naturally. This is my list of things that I believe got shortchanged due to “writing to the epilogue”:

Fortuona is pregnant in the epilogue: at the start of AMoL, Mat gets teleported to Ebou Dar without any kind of narrative or logistical explanation (contradicting his PoV chapter in the ending of ToM, where he was planning to return to Caemlyn, which would have thrust him directly into the main stories at play in the prologue & early chapters). I feel like part of it is that Sanderson really wanted to get that bun in the oven as quickly as possible.

“they expected something from the three of them; a show of some kind” : There’s just a wide acknowledgement in the epilogue that literally everyone knows that Rand has three girlfriends, so everyone just already knows in AMoL that Rand is in a relationship with three women now. No need for anyone to have emotional reactions to it, please! (not even Rand’s literal dad!) This one also ends up being weird because it seems to change from moment-to-moment whether or not the whole army knows that Rand has three girlfriends (if everyone knows already, why is Rand playing spy games with Elayne?).

Min is Fortuona’s pregnancy test: Min instantly respects ~Fortuona~ as an empress even while thinking that she doesn’t normally respect nobility. Bizarre, considering Min’s own history with the Seanchan from Falme.

Mat kills Fain: we got two super-quick glimpses of Fain earlier in the book to set up this moment but Mat had so much other stuff to do that Sanderson couldn’t really do more than say: yeah, Fain exists and he’s bad, lol.

Minor elements I think were affect by the epilogue:

Rand is still pondering over the idea of choosing between Elayne, Aviendha, or Min: we get Rand’s going “am I allowed to love three women? idk sounds fake” when he and Aviendha sleep together in chapter 4, which just was kinda silly. I think the epilogue is also the genesis of the vibe where Rand appears to consider “having sex with Min for months” to not be any kind of “choice” when it comes to the three women, but having a romantic interlude with Aviendha or Elayne would signal a choice -- because the epilogue acts like the situation between Rand and each of the three women is roughly equal, so “months of sex with Min” appears to hold the same emotional weight to Rand as “pining from afar with two nights of intense passion” does when he thinks of either Elayne or Aviendha.

Mat has no thoughts about any of the Westlands characters: I think that this is more of a subconscious effect -- as he focused more on the final book, I think Sanderson focused on the relationships highlighted in the all-important epilogue... and the only person that Mat cares about in the epilogue is himself *cough* I mean, Fortuona, of course, lol. In both TGS and in ToM, Mat’s deep affection for various Westlands characters was constantly on display, as shown in his own ‘loves lying to himself’ way. This gets curtailed in AMoL, especially in the early Ebou Dar chapters.

I think I’m going to let myself might let myself marinate over the various books before I post a final list of my personal ranking of the books.

One thing that I’ve really noticed is that, more than any other character, the quality of Mat’s storyline has a huge impact on my overall enjoyment of the book. In CoT & KoD, Elayne and Egwene (both of whom I love), got pretty good stories. But Mat’s story was so bad that it made it difficult for me to enjoy the good parts. But maybe some time just letting myself think about the series as a whole will balance out my thoughts. Does that make Mat my favorite character or just my most impactful character? idk. I feel like Elayne or Rand would more consistently hit the top of my favorites.

Overall top five characters throughout the entire series:

1. Elayne

2. Rand

3. Egwene

4. Mat (might be higher if not for CoT & KoD)

5. Nynaeve (might be higher if she didn’t basically disappear after she married Lan)

Then, moving on to the next favs, I think there’s more uncertainty there for me:

6. Verin, probably, but it could be Moiraine. Let’s say they tie.

7. Aviendha and Siuan can both go here. Both generally very good and interesting characters.

8. You know, I had a real turnaround with Gawyn in this reread of the books; I’m gonna put him here. He can share this spot with Leilwin née Egeanin.

9. Loial, probably. Needed more PoV; that would have been nice. I’ll put Faile here with him.

10.  For more minor characters, I gotta give a shout-out to Narishma (favorite Asha’man), Sulin, Pevara during her Black Ajah Hunter phase, Olver is really good in his sections here in AMoL, Asmodean for being my favorite fail-Forsaken and Moghedien for sticking it out until the very end, Elaida honestly very fun PoV as far as villains go, Teslyn and Joline for being troopers and enduring Mat Cauthon at his very worst, my girl Berelain who always deserved better, the ‘Finn in general always lots of fun, Aludra and Juilin who always kept their integrity intact.

#wot #wheel of time #wot reread #wot book spoilers #wot spoilers #wot amol spoilers #wot a memory of light spoilers #mat cauthon #rand al'thor #elayne trakand #so it really feels like the 'main characters' of the actual last battle #were rand mat egwene and elayne #with everyone else being more of a secondary character #who helped the one of those main four storylines #posting this today because ao3 is being slightly iffy right now #so i'm going to post the next chapter of voice on thursday #and just give ao3 some time to work out whatever the connection issues are

[thevestigeofvanillaan]

Headcanons about sex, kinks, sexual shit in general with the boys! (Steve Harrington, Billy Hargrove, Eddie Munson)

Steve Harrington:

He is such a sweetheart in bed. Like he's always asking for consent to do anything and everything.

"Is this okay, baby?" "Can I hold your head while you suck my cock?" "Are you ready?" "You can take a break if you want, I know it's tiring baby."

The first time you guys had sex, you weren't even friends. In fact, you guys were probably enemies and the first time you did it was probably just hate sex.

"I guess you're not so bad after all."

And that's when you started dating King Steve who became the sweetest little thing in the sheets.

He loves eating you out. He just loves pleasing you and he won't cum until you have twice.

He isn't really kinky at all. He likes it vanilla, never taboo.

Sometimes you guys try new and different sex positions but they almost never stick.

He loves basic cowgirl and missionary. He loves to see your face when you take his cock.

Quickies are always the best with Steve. And he is willing to please you any time, anywhere so long as you ask him to.

He is pretty vocal. And he let's out these pretty, slutty boy moans (he's definitely a switch but you'd barely ever hear a groan from him, almost always slutty boy moans).

He's a tits guy. He loves your boobies!

He fondles with them all the time. He sleeps either with one in his hand, or with his head on top of them.

"Baby, you got the nicest pair of boobies I've ever seen, you know that?"

Again, before you guys dated and you lowkey hated eachother, he would stare at your tits all the time because he knew it made you uncomfortable and because he actually did really like them...

He loves kissing and marking you.

Kissing you is his favorite thing to do. He kisses you majority of the time as you guys fuck. Every time you guys kiss, it feels like it's his first time all over again.

He craves your kisses so much. And he loves covering your neck and especially your tits with hickeys. "Gotta let everyone know who you belong to, huh?" "Who do you belong to, baby? All me. You're all mine now that I've got you all marked up."

Billy Hargrove:

Controversial opinion, but he would rather praise than degrade you. LISTEN. He is not a degrader. He loves his prettygirl.

I love the idea of Billy being so big on praise.

"Fuck prettygirl, doin' so good for me." "Baby, you take my cock so good." "You're my pretty little girl, right? Oh come on baby,, tell me how you're my pretty girl. Only mine."

After basketball practice when everyone is showering he brags about how wet, warm, and tight your pussy is and how it's waiting at home for him.

"Y'know, my prettygirl has the tightest, prettiest little wet pussy all for me." "I gotta go boys, my girl is at home with open legs waitin' for me."

He drives you everywhere, you're his pretty little passenger princess. He holds your plump thigh, inching closer to feel the heat radiating from your warm cunt.

There have been many occasions when you would go to parties wearing no underwear under that tight little dress of yours. And your pretty boyfriend wouldn't be wearing any either.

You guys basically compete to see who can last longer before going to the bathroom to fuck eachother. And you always lose when you see him adjusting his dick in his pants.

In reality he's doing that so people don't see the large erection in his jeans. And because his balls stick to his thighs so either way!

He loves doggystyle. Loves watching your skin ripple when his skin hits the curve of your ass. Plus he likes to spank you as he fucks you.

Which is a reason he likes cowgirl and backwards cowgirl. He can spank you in either of those too.

He's an ass guy. And a thigh guy.

But his favorite thing ever, if I'm being honest is when you cockwarm him. Whether its with that warm cunt of yours or your pretty lips around his cock he's happy.

He'll be doing work and have you just sit on his cock as he does it. "Don't move." "Stop squirming, pretty."

Eddie Munson:

Let's be honest here.. this man is kinky.

He's willing to try anything and everything you ask. Doesn't matter what it is, piss kink, daddy kink, mommy kink, rape kink, roleplay.. I mean every fucking thing babes.

Incase it ever gets too violent or you feel uncomfortable (which isn't often because eddie knows how to take care of you) you have a safe word. "Kit." Because who says kit out of nowhere when you're getting fucked.

And when you're tied up you have a button in your hand that you press and it'll make a noise, letting him know you want to stop.

When you can't talk/when you his cock in your mouth you tap his thigh twice, letting him know you need to breathe.

"Are you okay? I'm so sorry baby, I didn't mean it." "Honey.." He would whine, feeling so ashamed that you had to use the safe key. But you always reassure him that he did nothing wrong.

And he's so good at all of it too. You don't quite get how the fuck he's able to just do whatever you ask him to, but you love it.

You guys share an onlyfans and post different recommended positions, kinks, and situations. And trust me, you guys get so much money off having brutal sex all the time.

I mean hey, it's better than working a shitty 9-5 with minimum wage..

Plus exhibitionism is fun anyways. One of his favorite kinks actually.

"You guys love getting off to watching us have sex, don't you? Dirty bastards." "Watch me pump my cock? Hah, you're gonna have to pay more for that, sweetheart." "Fuck her.. uh, no. Why should you horny bastards tell me what to do?"

He honestly just bribes your audience for money saying shit like "if someone pays 5,000 I'll do top rec." And everyone feeds into that shit donating thousands of dollars to watch you guys on stream.

Sex off camera is the same as it is on.. just people aren't watching obviously. Unless of course he chooses to fuck you in front of the window that he often fucks you in front of anyways.

"Hey, what do you wanna try now?" "Wanna try something new, hun? I heard this cool.."

He's really sweet and will do whatever you want him to!

#stranger things smut #stranger things #steve harrington smut #steve harrington #billy hargrove smut #billy hargrove #eddie munson smut #eddie munson #i love them so much.

[gatorbites-imagines]

Yandere Corey Cunningham and Michael x Reader [together please] but separate is fine also . 🎀

Yandere Corey Cunningham and Michael Myers x male reader

Headcanons

Major Halloween ends spoilers, don’t read if you don’t want spoilers!

 These two are my current obsession, and I love yandere stuff, but I just haven’t gotten to write it much, so thank you for requesting it. 

If you guys want more yandere stuff just let me know 😘

-          In the beginning you are only Coreys obsession. You had stood by his side after the accident and as his mental state suffered, he became obsessed with you.

-          Corey at this point isn’t the type of yandere to do much, he is all obsessive and loving thoughts but is so insecure and self-hating to act on his desires. He sees himself as trash and unworthy of you in every way.

-          This doesn’t stop him from stealing some of your things though, but its things you wont miss like a shirt you haven’t worn in years or an old notebook, or a chapstick from the bottom of your backpack.

-          When you have sleepovers at each other’s places, Corey lays awake to watch you sleep. When he’s feeling extra bold, he might even touch you. But its small like holding your hand or brushing your hair out of your face.

-          After you leave the sleepovers at his place, he always crawls into bed in as little clothes as possible and smells the pillow you used and gets off to it. He always feels ashamed and disgusted with himself afterwards.

  -          After meeting Michael Corey becomes more bold and less ashamed of his thoughts, hell start stalking you in a very Michael like fashion. Like standing just out of view or lurking in the shadows.

-          Starts stealing more important things, like your favorite shirt or your toothbrush. He has a shrine built for you down in the sewers where he keeps his most priced items.

-          One of the first people Corey kills is someone who has been flirting with you for a long time and not leaving you alone, Michael can only watch his interest as Corey rips the person to shreds.

-          After looking into Coreys memories Michael starts to be drawn to you as well, seeing you as someone who might have loved him too when he was younger. You had stood by Coreys side even during everything, so why not Michael.

-          Where Corey still feels ashamed or shy at times and stays cautious, Michael does not. He will stand above you whilst you sleep or sneak into the bathroom to watch you shower without you noticing.

-          Michael is the one who will target your family if they pose a threat. If you a close to your family Corey will try and leave them alone, but if you aren’t they will both kill them.

  -          During Halloween night they still go on a rampage, but instead of Michael killing Corey they work together like a well-oiled machine and end up kidnapping you and bringing you to the sewers with them.

-          They break into your house or work or wherever you are. If you are at home they’ll just sneak in and knock you out, but if you are in areas with other people they will rampage and kill everyone there and then knock you out and take you.

-          When you wake up you are confused at your surroundings, and you scream at the two towering figures above you, both wearing the same thing. You try to run, and that’s when you realize you aren’t tied up. As you try to flee one of them catch you and bring you back.

  -          When you break down crying after multiple attempts to run away, thinking you are here to be killed and they’re just toying with you, Michael actually hugs you to his chest with an almost too tight grip.

-          Corey comes up behind you and pulls his mask up and tells you that its okay and they aren’t gonna hurt you. You try to demand answers from Corey, but he just kisses your neck and wraps his arms around you too.

-          You can’t do anything but shiver as they hold you, the metallic smell of blood filling your senses as Corey keeps kissing your neck and muttering all kinds of things about fate and love and losing you, Michael’s grip steel tight and his eyes unblinking as he stares down at you, almost daring you to run away.

#male reader #slasher #halloween ends #corey cunningham #Michael Myers #Slasher headcanon #slasher imagine #slasher x male reader #yandere #yandere slasher #corey cunningham x male reader #corey cunningham headcanon #corey cunningham imagine #corey cunningham x reader #michael myers imagine #michael myers headcanon #michael myers x male reader #slasher x reader #halloween ends spoilers #michael myers x reader

[randombrambles]

Okay...going to wade into the Sabezra discussion. May the flying spaghetti monster in sky have mercy on my soul...

I guess you could call me a "causal viewer" because, despite being a life long Star Wars fan, I'd never watched an episode of Rebels before watching Ahsoka. I just never got around to it and I've only watched a handful of eps of The Clone Wars too. But anyway once I started Ahsoka I was like "this show will clearly make more sense if I watch Rebels" so I started. I'm almost done season 3 of Rebels as of writing this post. And really loving Rebels btw. Part of me of like "why didn't I watch this earlier?" but on the other hand I don't have to wait for the next episode and I know the major spoilers already so I'm not going to get the rug yanked out from under me.

So back to Ahsoka and Sabezra...the big questions. Did I see the romance "coding" (not sure I agree "coding" is the right word but whatever, that's semantics) in Ahsoka? Yes. Sabine's actions definitely come across as her being in love with Ezra to me. That said I can also see the platonic angle, especially after having watched some of Rebels, so I'm not going to tell anyone they are wrong for viewing Sabine and Ezra's relationship as platonic. These things are subjective and open to interpretation until anything definitively romantic or definitively not romantic happens on screen. And at this point nothing definitive has happened either way on screen. Nobody has been proven right and nobody has been proven wrong yet. Sabezra is basically schrodinger's cat right now.

Next how did I interpret the "like a sister" line in Ezra's holo. Um...full disclosure the first time I viewed that scene I didn't even register that he'd said she was "like a sister" to him. I'd never even seen Rebels at that point so I didn't know Ezra yet. So as a causal viewer my take away from that scene was Ezra meant a lot to Sabine and Sabine meant a lot to Ezra. And I'd be wiling to bet that that was the takeaway for most causal viewers.

So on rewatch do I think the "like a sister" line means that Ezra truly sees Sabine as a sister? No. On rewatch, paying close attention to the body language, and after having watched some Rebels, I think Ezra is both struggling to find the words to tell Sabine how important she is to him and telling her what he thinks she needs to hear in that moment. The problem is that in English we don't have a word to describe someone isn't technically family but who isn't a lover either but who's also way more than "just" a friend. Sister is the best word Ezra can come up with in that moment but you can tell from his awkward body language and his literal scoff as soon as he says it that its not the right word. And yeah I think Ezra thinks that Sabine sees him as a brother so he tells her what he thinks she wants to hear right before he heads of on what very well could have been a suicide mission.

Do I think Sabezra is going to be made canon on Tuesday's final episode of Ahsoka (of season 1 at least). No, but hold on nobody panic!!! I also don't think that means Sabezra is dead in the water either. And frankly I'm kind of mystified as to why Sabezra shippers seem to think that the next episode is make or break for Sabezra when its clearly not? If there isn't a love declaration or a kiss or both (which is what I'm assuming people would interpret can them being made canon) its not like either Sabine or Ezra are going to marry someone else on Tuesday either. And since much of Ahsoka has been set up, meaning not much is actually going to get resolved in the next ep (Thrawn hasn't even left Perida[?] yet! I fear we are ending on a cliff hanger), we'll be seeing Sabine and Ezra again. There's no rush for them to get together romantically (and I know that's hard to hear for people who've been shipping for years but its true).

And further to the "there's no rush" point I actually have to say I that I think its WAY too soon for anything definitively romantic to happen between Ezra and Sabine yet (and again I get how hard that is for those who've been shipping them for a long time). And I say that as both a "casual viewer" and someone who's also watched a good chunk of Rebels now. For the causal viewer who hasn't watched Rebels, which is probably a big chunk of the audience for Ahsoka, they barely know Sabine, have just met Ezra and have only seen them interacting for ONE episode and don't know any of their history. A kiss or a love declaration would seem out of the blue at this point I think. And as someone who's getting into Rebels I still think its too soon. While I agree that Sabine is very likely in love with Ezra I don't think she's admitted to herself yet (that's why Baylan used the word family when he was getting her to hand over the map thingy imho) no way is she ready to tell HIM. And as for Ezra...dude is clueless that Sabine might might have non platonic feelings for him so no way is he going to risk ruining their friendship by blurting out that he's in love with her. And not only that they've been separated for 10 YEARS ffs. They need to get to know each other again before anything romantic can happen, again imho. I want Sabezra to become canon but I want it done WELL. Sabezra is a friends to lovers ship, they are still firmly in the friends stage right now, it needs to be a sloooooow burn.

And finally do I think Sabezra will become canon? Honestly...I don't know. I'd like it to, it would be really nice to have a non problematic ship, especially after the sequel trilogy robbed us of FinnRey and tried to force freaking r*ylo. But I think Filoni and the other powers that be over at DLF (he is NOT the sole person calling the shots here, keep that in mind everyone) are probably testing the waters right now and waiting to see what the audience reactions are like before they make any decisions. I'd be wiling to bet that by the end of Tuesday's episode the door will be left wide open for pretty much anything to happening shipping wise. So we'll just have to wait and see. Time will tell, it always does.

#sabezra #ahsoka show #star wars rebels #ezra bridger #sabine wren #long post #that was long #sorry

[cowgurrrl]

I REALLY need some Joel fluff where reader says to him “I have loved you with all of my soul”

SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG BUT I WENT OVERBOARD SO HOPEFULLY ITS OKAY

Kiss Me Once, and Kiss Me Twice

Pairing: rockstar!joel miller x actress!reader

Author’s note: hey remember when I said I was either gonna not write or write too much guess what happened

Summary: You and Joel finally get married [4.3k!!!!]

Warnings: wedding stress, quick quick mentions of smoking tobacco and marijuana, emotions, Hank Miller being the only southern boomer I care about, fluff :-)

When you were growing up and imagining your wedding day, you never saw yourself getting married in Texas. But once you're in the throes of wedding planning, you very quickly realize you don't want to get married in California. Too many people. Too much of a chance of the paparazzi crashing the wedding. Too close to home. Joel talks about the idea of getting married in your home town which you veto immediately. He starts listing every location significant to you two, New York, Ireland, Spain, and even Australia, but none of them feel right. At one point, you even think about suggesting you just go to the courthouse and file the paperwork, but you know Joel's family would be heartbroken if you didn't have a "real" wedding. 

Filming has taken over a majority of your life, as it often does. Joel is in the process of creating his own record label with a studio to match. Ellie is looking at colleges and trying to figure out her next steps, while Sarah is already planning her move to Sacramento to pursue a job and her Master's degree. It feels like there will never be a right time for your wedding. One night, when you're on hour three of being hunched over your computer, looking at fucking floral arrangements, Joel comes up behind you and kneads relaxing circles into your neck with big hands. You sigh and lean back into him, pressing your head into his belly.

"I thought this was gonna be more fun." You mumble, and he laughs as he leans down to kiss the spot under your ear. 

"And I thought I told you to hire a wedding planner." He says. 

"I don't want a wedding planner. I just want a wedding." 

"Well, honey," you can hear him trying to hold in his laughter at your stubborn pouting. To his credit, he pulls it together. "We can find a way to make that happen, but for now, why don't you take a break? You can tell me all your wedding ideas while I pack our bags for Texas." He says, his thumbs adding a little more pressure to your sore muscles, and you melt into him. He could've asked you for the moon right then, and you would've said yes. 

"Only if you promise to tell me your ideas, too." 

"Deal." He says as he shuts your laptop and scoops you out of your chair. You spend the rest of the night debating cake flavors, groomsmen and bridesmaids, and where you want to go on your honeymoon. It's technically still wedding planning but all the light-hearted parts of wedding planning. You're grateful for the distraction. 

Two days later, you, Joel, Tommy, Maria, and the girls get on a flight back to Austin. Hank and Lucia are overdue for a visit anyways, and you figured getting out of California might help to clear your heads for a while. However, the boys immediately flee the scene when you arrive at the Miller Ranch. You and Lucia share a confused look as Hank leads them down a steep hill, pointing at a pasture and talking about something you can't hear, but decide to take it as an opportunity for girl time. 

You, Lucia, Maria, Sarah, and Ellie spend the night drinking margaritas and exchanging stories. It's nice to giggle and talk with them like you're little girls again. In a way, they make you feel like you get a second chance at girlhood, and for that, you will always be grateful. Once it gets close to dinner time, the Miller men shuffle their way back inside the house, kick off their muddy boots, walk over to their partners, and kiss them sweetly. 

As one big blended family, you make dinner together. Lucia delegates tasks while Hank and the girls steal pieces of chicken when nobody's looking. Joel pretends to need something from the fridge to slide past you and smack your ass as he does. Lucia catches him, hits his arm, and yells at him in Spanish about being nice to you. "Mamá!" Joel tries to defend himself, but you just give him a look and leave him to be lectured at by his mother. Once dinner is ready, you all sit at the long table in the dining room and continue to laugh, talk, and be a family. Maria asks questions about wedding planning while Lucia (lovingly) interrogates Ellie and Sarah about their love lives. 

"Are you dating anyone, mija?" Lucia asks, gesturing to Sarah. Sarah shifts uncomfortably in her chair, and you know, even if she lied, her grandmother would see right through it.

"I actually met someone," she says. "His name is Ethan. He's a firefighter, and we met when someone pulled the fire alarm on campus." 

"He's really nice, Mamá," Joel jumps in before Lucia can continue her questions, raising his eyebrows at her. "We really like him." He looks at you like he's trying to show you how supportive he's being of Sarah's relationship even though it took him multiple meetings and several talks with both of you to approve of his daughter's choices. 

"Sarah, you didn't even tell her the best part." You poke, and Sarah sighs, already anticipating Lucia's reaction and making you smirk as you eat. 

"There's a best part?" Lucia asks. "Well, now you gotta tell me."

"Ethan speaks Spanish," Sarah says. Lucia got so excited you would've thought the second coming of Christ was happening in her living room. She immediately starts talking about coming to LA to meet him and his family or even flying them out to Austin to see the ranch. You can't help but smile as you watch them conspire together. 

Once everyone is full, the boys take the dirty plates to the kitchen to wash them while you and the other women put away the leftovers and clean the table. Joel waits until the dining room is back together before stealing you away from the chaos and bringing you outside. The sun setting over the Texas hill country takes your breath away as he walks you halfway between the house and the stables, with just enough acreage to not see too much of either. You can't believe how quiet it is out here. Once you get far enough out, Tommy and Hank come into view with little posts in the ground. 

"What's this?" You ask Joel as you get closer, and he smiles. He takes his hand in yours and stops walking to look at you. 

"I've been thinkin’, and I wanted to see what you thought about gettin’ married here." He says. 

"On the ranch?"

"Look, we've already mapped it all out," he says, leaving your side to walk to one of the posts. "This could be the dance floor, and over here," he walks a few feet to another post. "This could be where the tables get set up," he gestures before walking back over to you and pointing to a big white oak tree a couple hundred feet away. "And we could have the ceremony under that tree. Dad and Tommy already said they would help me put up some of those fairy lights you like so much. We could make it really nice." He says, and you glance between him and Hank and Tommy.

"Is this what you guys did all afternoon?" 

"Yes, ma'am," Hank says, and you smile. You look out at the painted sky with the wildflowers swaying in the breeze, and from this far out, you can see the comforting glow of light from the house. You can also spot a lazy Longhorn grazing in the pasture about half a mile away, completely unaware of the world around him. It's beautiful. And private. And so perfectly encompasses what you both want for the wedding. 

"You don't have to make a decision right now. I know it's a lot, but I thought it'd be fun." Joel says. You wrap your arms around his neck and step into him, smiling when his hands find your waist. 

"Let's do it." You say, and he lights up.

"Wait, really?"

"I never thought I'd say it, but yeah. Let's get married in Texas." The words are barely out of your mouth before he picks you up off the ground and spins you around giddily. He kisses you to seal the deal, and Tommy and Hank cheer from their spots. 

After that, wedding planning really ramps up. You set an official date. You make Carolina your Maid of Honor, and Ryan agrees to stand in as your officiant after Lucia determines he's "just Catholic enough." Elizabeth gets the responsibility of ring bearer since she's a little older, while Victoria is the flower girl. You quickly add Sarah, Ellie, and Maria to your wedding party after assuring Ellie that she can wear whatever she wants. Joel makes Tommy his Best Man and asks his band to be his groomsmen. Even though Wayne is the only other guy in the band, they all say yes and don't even blink at the idea of having to fly to Texas. 

The next few months are a blur of flower orders, cake tastings, schedule workarounds, and more. Carolina, Lucia, Maria, Sarah, and Ellie go dress shopping with you. You were initially just going to send some ideas to your stylist for her to make you a dress, but they were all vehemently against that idea. It takes a couple different stores and a handful of different dresses, but you finally find a sleek silk dress with a lace bodice that makes everyone, including you, cry when you stand in the mirror. Your bridesmaids find their outfits in no time, and Carolina gets cute little dresses for the girls. 

You only invite the really important people and a photographer. You only tell a few people outside the guests and the wedding party when and where you're getting married. It's none of their business. This is just for your family. No outsiders. You don't even hire a DJ. Tommy just agrees to bring a big speaker, and you sit down to make a playlist with Joel about a month before the wedding.

Your crew of people descend upon Austin the week of your wedding, ready to work together to turn the Miller Ranch into a dream location. Thankfully, Hank and Lucia have gathered their own community of people and already have half the work done by the time you come up the long dirt driveway. Ryan helps Hank, Tommy, and his buddies hang lights in the tree. Carolina and Sarah help Lucia, and her friends put together centerpieces. Joel's band and Ellie set up tables and the dance floor. Whenever you or Joel try to help or lend a hand, someone ends up shooing you away and telling you to relax. They only listen to either of you when you're giving direction on how you want things to go. 

You keep the Bachelor and Bachelorette parties to a minimum, only going out to a few bars far from Sixth Street and spending most of the time getting drunk in the guest house turned Bridal Suite. You're pretty sure Hank gave Joel and the groomsmen cigars, which is fine as long as they don't find out you gave the bridesmaids weed. It's nice to not have to worry about nosy people or cameras ruining the days leading up to your wedding. The quiet, giggly privacy is all you want. It also helps to clear your head when writing your vows.

From the beginning, you and Joel decided you wanted to write your own vows instead of using the archaic, pre-written ones. You just didn't know then how hard it would be to find the right things to say. You ask Carolina, Lucia, and Maria for advice, but they just tell you the same cheesy line of "writing from your heart." While it's incredibly sweet, it's not exactly helpful. The night before the wedding, Sarah and Ellie sneak into your room for one last sleepover before you marry Joel, and you ask them for help. You read them what you've already written and catch them both wiping tears as you recite it. They give you logical advice and stay up with you to rewrite your vows until they're perfect. You fall asleep with them tucked under your arms like babies despite them being twenty-two and eighteen. 

In the morning, everyone piles into your room with plates of breakfast and mimosas from the main house. You're not allowed to leave the guest house because they think if you see Joel before the ceremony, it'll be bad luck. You're not sure you believe that, but you'll take the excuse to get other people to run things to and from the house. Ellie plays music from her speaker as everyone picks a corner to do their hair and makeup in, and you spend the first half of the day getting ready and spending time with the most important women in your life. They help you into your dress once the photographer arrives to take pre-wedding photos of you guys, but everyone is a crying mess once you're all dressed up with the dress, veil, and everything. 

Many, many sweet words and hugs are exchanged, and the photographer catches all of them. Sarah and Ellie surprise you with new earrings from Joel and a beautiful necklace they picked out for the wedding. Sarah helps you put on the earrings while Ellie clasps the necklace around your neck. You give the girls rings that match the one you've been hiding in plain sight on your right ring finger for weeks now. "For as much as I'm promising to love your dad today, I'm also promising to love you guys with everything I am for as long as I am," you say, tears springing in your eyes as you hand the delicate rings to them. They're crying, too, but they're holding it together a little bit better than you are. "I'll always be here for you, no matter what. And I hope I never forget just how lucky I am to have two of the most extraordinary women in the world in my life." After all these years, it feels like you're finally becoming the family you always knew you were. 

The rest of the day goes by way too fast. One minute you're hugging Sarah and Ellie, and the next, your arm is tucked under Hank's as your bridesmaids and goddaughters slowly walk down the aisle. Your heart is beating fast against your rib cage, and you feel like you can't breathe, but you know once you see Joel, you'll feel completely at peace. You go from fiddling with your bouquet to your engagement ring to even readjusting Hank's tie as Alex plays an instrumental version of your favorite ABBA song. 

"Honey, look at me," Hank says gently. You meet his green eyes, and he smiles as he puts a hand over yours and squeezes. "Take a breath," he says. He demonstrates with an exaggerated inhale in case you forgot and you copy him. Together, you take three big breaths, and once the last of the Texas air leaves your lungs, Hank squeezes your hand again. "Now, I know I really shouldn't be sayin' this since that's my boy up there, but if you've gone and changed your mind, I'll bring my truck round the corner and drive you wherever you needa go." You laugh at his words and shake your head. 

"I kinda love him, so I think I'll be okay, but thank you." You try to brush it off, but your anxiety still lingers. Hank nods and bumps you with his shoulder.

"For what it's worth, I was scared shitless the day I married Lucia." He whispers like it's a secret, and you look at him.

"Really?"

"Really," he confirms. "We were so goddamn young and thought we were so grown up. I remember seein' her walkin' down the aisle and just thinkin' bout how I was gonna support her and give her the life she deserved. I didn't know if I was man enough to do it. I almost started cryin' just cause of that."

"What changed?" You ask, and he chuckles, shaking his head. His hair moves with the wind, and for a second, you get a glimpse of what Joel could look like at his age. And it doesn't scare you.

"She smiled at me, and I was done for. I knew if I didn't marry her, I was gonna be kickin' myself for the rest of my life," he finds the back of Lucia's head as Tommy and Carolina pass her, and he smiles. "Still the best decision I ever made." You take a deep breath and realize the line of wedding party is getting shorter and shorter as each pair is dispatched down the aisle. Your heart is still beating fast, but you feel less sick and more excited about getting to see Joel after not seeing him all day. You squeeze Hank's hand again before sliding it under his arm and resting your head on his shoulder. 

"Ready, baby girl?" He asks as he kisses your head, and you nod. With Hank's strong arm leading the way, you start walking down the aisle and immediately lock eyes with Joel. He starts crying, which makes you start crying so much you have to blink several times to see how handsome he looks in his suit. Hank kisses your cheek as you reach the aisle's end before hugging Joel and handing you off to him. You turn around, give Carolina your bouquet, and take Joel's hands.

"You look so beautiful," Joel whispers, and you sniffle.

"Thank you," you whisper back. "You look pretty handsome yourself." 

"Gucci," he mouths, gesturing to his suit, and you nod your approval. It's silly enough to break the emotional tension as Ryan starts speaking, even though you're not really listening. He says something to appease Lucia's Catholic roots before talking about how important and beautiful marriage is, but you can't stop staring at Joel. It's only when Ryan says your name and the word 'vows' do you snap back to reality. Carolina quickly supplies you with the scribbled-on paper and a tissue because nobody knows you as well as she does, and you squeeze Joel's hand.

"Joel, it seems hard to remember a time when we weren't together and even harder to remember what my life was like before I met you. I did and accomplished so many important things, but nothing seemed as important or special once you and the girls came into my life. You three became my entire world, and for that alone, I will spend the rest of my life trying to repay you for that gift," you say. "When I was trying to write my vows, I honestly didn't know where to start. Instead of struggling by myself, I asked the two people who've been there since the beginning of our relationship: Sarah and Ellie. After giving me lots of advice and all but forcing me to add something about loving you even though you snore," you and Joel laugh.

"Sarah told me it might be a good idea to write about the very first time I realized I loved you, but when I started thinking about it, I realized I couldn't pinpoint one specific day or time. There was never a moment of clarity or realization when it came to you. Loving you came easily and naturally, like breathing, and once I realized it, I knew there was no going back. You were and still are the person I want to spend my life with. Our story is not traditional or necessarily one for the history books, and I think you'd agree with me," your voice catches in your throat, and Joel's thumb brushes against your knuckles softly. 

"We've had setbacks and hard times. Everything from moving across the world to trying to remember who loaded the dishwasher last but through everything, you were my home. My safe place. My reason to keep going. And if historians in a hundred years pay us any attention, I hope they write about how protected you made me feel. I hope they talk about how we found ways to laugh together even when it felt hard. I hope they spend hours and hours lecturing about how much I loved you because I do. I have loved you with all my soul for as long as I can remember, and I will keep loving you like that until long after I forget the exact details of our first date. Thank you for choosing me." You sniffle, fold your paper back up, and wipe under your eyes with Carolina's tissue. Various sniffles and tears rake over your guests and wedding party as Tommy hands Joel his vows with wet eyes. 

"When I first moved to LA with Sarah, I didn't know what was gonna happen. I didn't know I'd have another daughter, my band, or meet the love of my life. The day we met, I remember thinkin' I'd never known anybody as witty or smart as you, and I still think that. But now, after so many years, I know you're more than that. You're brave, kind, talented, hard-working, and way out of my league," he says, and you laugh. "The first time I remember realizin' just what an amazing person you are was when I told you about Sarah and Ellie. Other people would be freaked out or even upset if they found out the person they'd been datin' had kids. You weren't. You asked questions about them and were selfless with your time so I could be with the girls when they needed a little extra love and care. And when you met them, you treated them like you'd known them your whole life. You treated them like you're own," he squeezes your hand a little hard like he's trying to find the strength to continue. "That's when I knew I was gonna marry you,"

"I trusted you then with the two people closest to my heart and it's safe to say you'll always be the one I trust with the girls. You'll always be the one I trust to get me out of bed on time. You'll always be the one I trust to help me make fashion choices. You'll always be the one I trust to be patient with me and get coffee when we need to recharge because you're my person. I love you, and I'll love you when I'm old and wrinkly and can't hear for shit. And you'll know all my stories, and I'll know all your movies by heart, and we'll laugh for years and years. I can't wait to start forever with you." He almost wipes his eyes with his vows, and you quickly switch his hands, making him laugh.

I love you, he mouths.

I love you, too, you mouth back.

Everyone, including Ryan, takes a second to sit in their emotions before taking a deep breath and coming back together. He calls Elizabeth forward, and you exchange rings. Joel stands up a little straighter the second the gold band is placed on his left hand, and you smile. Ryan clears his throat, eyes shining as he stares at you two and opens his mouth.

"By the power vested in me by the state of California, I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the bride!" He announces. Your few guests cheer loudly as Joel cradles your face in his hands and kisses you. Wildflower petals scatter around you, and the sun is setting behind the altar, but nothing matters as much as your husband does now. He kisses you a few more times before finally pulling away and joining the cheering. You walk back up the aisle, now married, and everyone follows after you.

The reception after is perfect with all your favorite foods and desserts, including Lucia's Texas Trash Pie, which makes your mouth water just looking at it. People hug you and Joel and offer congratulations and even a few sweet tears at the ceremony. Carolina and Tommy deliver amazing, hilarious speeches honoring both of you, and then it's finally time to dance. You and Joel chose "It's Been a Long, Long Time" by Kitty Kallen and Harry James for your first dance, and under the fairy lights and setting Texas sun, you realize just how perfect a choice it was. 

You bury your head in his neck and sway slowly with him, basking in the tenderness of being so close to him. He sings along quietly and kisses the shell of your ear as you dance. Towards the end, you spot Ellie and Sarah standing beside the dance floor and wave them to you behind Joel's back. They hesitate for a second before running to join you. Joel tucks each girl under his arm and kisses their foreheads. The four of you make for an awkward little slow dance, but you're all giggling and smiling despite it. 

As the song ends, Joel escorts the three of you off the dance floor before grabbing Lucia for the mother-son dance. Lucia is so short compared to Joel that it's almost impossible not to smile. Still, he's slow and careful with her, and his eyes sparkle as they converse secretly. You catch Hank watching them through teary eyes nearby, and a secret plan hatches in your brain. Quickly, you rush over to where your phone is connected to the speaker and queue up an acoustic version of “Simply the Best” by Tina Turner. When Lucia and Joel's song ends, you grab Hank's hand and pull him onto the floor as the song starts playing. 

"Now, what are you doin'?" He asks as you put your hands on his shoulders.

"You never got to have a father-daughter dance. I figured you should get at least one." You explain. Tears fill his eyes almost instantly, and you smile when he holds you close. 

"Thank you," he whispers, his voice thick with emotion. "For everythin'." 

"I should be thanking you and Lucia. You raised my husband."

The rest of the night is spent dancing, drinking, and spending time with your favorite people. You’re not exactly sure how long you were out there celebrating but you do know that your feet were sore and your brain utterly fried from the long, emotional day. Joel carries you to bed bridal style and carefully lays you down, doing his best not to rip your dress as he helps you slip your shoes off. Together, you undo your hair, take off your makeup, take off and hang up your dress, and change into one of Joel’s shirt before crawling into bed.

“Tired?” Joel asks as he starts shedding his wedding clothes too and you nod into the pillow.

“Sorry for not, like, wanting to consummate our marriage right now.” You say, and he laughs. It’s that delirious, breathless laughter where you’re not sure if the joke was actually that funny or if the reaction to it is. You laugh too and watch his nose scrunch up and his body shake with joy. He steps out of his slacks, presses a knee into the mattress to lean over you, and kisses you sweetly.

“Don’t worry bout that,” he mumbles against you. “We’ve got our whole lives.”

Once he’s finished changing, he crawls into bed and pulls you close to rub your back. You can feel his wedding band getting caught in the fabric but you don’t say anything. You fall asleep in his arms, full of love, Texas Trash Pie, and giddy excitement at what the future holds. How could you not when you get to spend it with him?

#one for the money two for the show #rockstar!joel miller x actress!reader #rockstar!joel x actress!reader #rockstar!joel miller #the last of us au #the last of us fluff #joel miller au #joel miller fluff #joel miller series #joel miller x reader #one for the money two for the show request #ellie the last of us #joel the last of us #the last of us series #the last of us #the last of us fic

[ladychota]

Run

Pairing - Loki x Female Reader

Warnings - Kidnapping, heartache, physical fighting, running away (lmk if you want me to add anything)

Summary - Loki's past actions have finally caught up with him.

Word Count - 1.4k

A/N - Based on the song 'Run' by Snow Patrol!

Masterlist

There are many things Loki has done in his life. Many things he's done wrong. And he knew they'd catch up with him eventually.

He just hadn't thought they would so soon.

You and him were planning what to do when the inevitable would happen: you'd saved up money, quit your jobs, sold the majority of your furniture and started to pack and make travel arrangements.

Loki hated to do this, especially to someone as amazing as you. If life went his way, he would've left you much sooner so you wouldn't be involved. Or, even better, he would never have taken things to the next level with you at all. 

He'd tried to gently break it to you. He'd tried to tell you he was running away and that you had to stay behind for your own safety. But, you being you, wouldn't let him leave without you. And, him being him, gave in to your stubbornness much too quickly.

In all honesty though, he's rather glad you insist on following him to the edges of the Earth and further. In all the wrongness in his life, it seems you're the only thing that's right. If it weren't for you, he's not sure he could've made it this far.

You'd both planned to leave in a few days, the final preparations being made to fall off the grid and into a life of constant running.

"It's okay," You had told him, running a gentle hand across his face. "We'll find a safe place eventually. And even if we don't, at least we'll be together,"

Loki could hardly look at you after your understanding words, but when he finally did, the small, worried smile sprawled across your features almost killed him with guilt. How could he do this to you? Force you into a lose lose situation? Either you stay with him and end up running for the rest of your life, or you never see him again.

He wants you to be happy and have a choice, even if he's not there. And he knows that you staying with him will take everything from you. You've already sacrificed so much for him, so how could he ask you to lose anymore?

Yet, every time he would bring this up with you, you'd always answer the same:

"You are my everything, my love. As long as I don't lose you, I am happy,"

So the plans were made. And they were so close to being complete. Bags were half-packed, the house close to empty. Any devices had been disconnected from the mains and abandoned, the last traces of the two of you inhabiting this small living space slowly being wiped away.

Loki had one more day to watch your tense body as you sped around the place, ensuring you had everything before you left the following night.

However, as per usual, the plans you and him were so close to completing were foiled. They arrived without being noticed - the both of you too distracted to sense something was off - and attacked when they were least expected.

"Do you think we should sell this?" You ask Loki, pointing to the kettle. He cringes, thinking of all the tea he won't get to brew; all the tea he won't get to drink. "And before you say anything," You continue. "We'll find tea somewhere, love. It's not exactly hard to ge-"

There's a loud crash; Loki instantly moves to shield you as the door is blown off its hinges and smashes onto the kitchen floor in a mess of small wooden fragments. Daggers form in his hands as the intruders charge forwards, aiming to capture him and anyone involved with his 'scheming' dead or alive. Blood is shed, the house: wrecked. Both you and Loki fight to keep your freedom - or at least, as much freedom as would be allowed in your current situation. More and more intruders barge into the house - much too many for two people to deal with on their own. 

Loki is - of course - considered as the main threat, and therefore is swamped with the most attackers. He's pushed further and further into the house; further and further away from you. Upon noticing the absence of you fighting by his side, he has a horrible realisation.

It trips up his heart, leaving it hanging by a singular, fraying thread. All he knows is he has to get back to you. He has to, for who knows what could happen otherwise? You are strong, and a remarkable fighter... yet you are just a mortal. Your strength has its limits, and though you've awed many by surpassing those limits time and time again, you can't do it every time.

Loki uses his newfound fear and anger of the situation to create a wave of magic so strong it knocks back the majority of the attackers. He pushes past the rest of them, sending daggers and bolts of acid green magic in the direction of anyone in his way.

But it seems his attempts are futile. For every attacker he shrugs off, they're replaced by at least two - he's struggling to shake them all.

A sudden soul-shattering scream from somewhere nearby slashes at the final string holding his heart, sending it plummeting into an abyss of fear and horror. The feelings well up inside him, overwhelming his senses as he calls out for you.

Through some miracle, Loki manages to drop all who were attacking him. He sprints through the open front door, yelling your name as if it'll magically bring you back to his side so you may run away together.

He watches through eyes slowly clouding over with tears as you're manhandled and dragged across the floor to a van. You fight against the iron grips of the attackers, unbothered - or perhaps unbeknownst - to the blood smeared across your face.

Loki yells once more, shrugging off the hands of people who try to grab him. Attention is brought to the God, and he thinks that perhaps it's the perfect time for you to free yourself.

But instead, you simply stop.

You stop fighting. Stop shouting. Instead, you murmur eight words meant only for his ears.

"Run," He hears you say. "Run and don't you dare look back."

Without thinking twice about it, he does. He runs as tears begin to overspill, trickling down his face and undoubtedly leaving blotchy red trails. His footsteps fall heavily on the ground, his breathing unnaturally quick. 

Loki keeps going - he keeps running until he's far away from the house, far away from the attackers, far away from... you. Eventually he can't move anymore and collapses on a park bench who knows where.

He's hungry, sweaty and exhausted; but most of all, his heart feels as if it's been dropped in poison. He just simply left you in the hands of those monsters. He left you to suffer on your own.

He left you behind.

And deep down he knows that your final words to him didn't just have one meaning.

Yes, you didn't want him to see you get thrown into the back of a van as if you were a ragdoll. Yes, you didn't want him to watch you get manhandled and hurt in the process.

But you also don't want him to look back on you. You don't want him to think about what was or what could have been. You don't want him to dwell on his mistakes and how he believes he led you into this. You don't want him to believe this is his fault.

You want him to forget about you so he can move on and potentially have the chance to be happy. And Loki knows this.

But how can he be happy when he's not with you?

He sits exhausted against the bench, the usually beautiful setting sun feeling as if it's taunting him. Fire-like rays of orange spread across the ground, the light making it look as if the trees are black with charcoal. 

Loki wonders if he should listen to you. If he should forget about you and move on; leave you with those horrid people. A very small part of him thinks this may be the best option... for him at least.

The rest of him knows he can't just leave you there. It could kill you. He also doesn't believe he can survive without the constant light you bring him. 

Shakily climbing to his feet, he begins work on a plan to rescue you and carry out the life you both used to wish you could have - a life where you don't have to run away. A life where you can be together without the constant fear.

Loki makes a quiet promise to himself, one he hopes he'll never break.

No more running.

#loki #laufeyson #loki laufeyson #loki x y/n #loki x reader #loki angst #loki fanfic #loki oneshot #mcu #avengers #marvel #loki laufeyson x reader #angst

[revelinwritin]

No Replacing You

summary: natasha and y/n are best friends that occasionally sleep together.. what happens when natasha catches feelings?

warnings: major fluff, oblivious reader, kissing.. that’s about it

word count: 1.5K

author’s note: thought i’d switch it up a bit and take a break from smut since i feel like i hate everything i write in that category at the moment :) hope you enjoy some fluff.

She knew what it was when she signed up for it. Well metaphorically signed up. There wasn't a pen and paper when she and Y/N agreed to become friends with benefits.

They were both lounging around Y/N's apartment watching tv one afternoon when the thought crossed Y/N's mind. She knew that it could've been a terrible idea if Natasha protested, but when she tilted the Russian woman’s head up from its position on her shoulder and pressed their lips together, she wasn't pushed back or fought.

It was surprising to her and Natasha. Once they pulled away, the redhead asked why she had kissed her and Y/N then explained her thoughts to the older woman. Natasha was hesitant at first, not wanting to ruin her friendship with Y/N, but she trusted her and was confident in their ability to stay friends no matter what.

But that was before she developed feelings and fell for Y/N. Typical. She knows. Natasha knows, but she also knows that Y/N can not find out, no matter how heart wrenching it is every time she spends the night over at Y/N's or vice versa. She tries not to let the hurt show in her eyes whenever Y/N talks about how hot this certain woman was at a coffee or the dates she's been on after meeting a few women on a dating app.

She often asks if Natasha is seeing anyone, but the Russian can't fathom giving anyone else her time when she knows her heart belongs to the one asking the question. She would shake her head, claiming to be too busy with her missions and training, which was true, but if she could make time for Y/N, she could make time for other people too, right?

But she didn't want to, she was selfish like that. If she wasn't busy with avenging the world, Natasha wanted to be with Y/N and today was one of those days.

"I'm sorry Nat. I have a date with Wanda today. Maybe you could come by afterwards?" Y/N insisted as she fixed herself in the mirror, balancing her phone between her ear and shoulder.

Her heart clenched at the mention of Wanda’s name. It was the third date that Y/N had with her, not that she was counting. She never declined an invitation from Natasha, not until she started seeing Wanda.

The redhead sighed. "Uh, maybe." Truthfully, she didn't think she'd want to be around Y/N after her date.

"Everything okay Natty?" Y/N asked.

The Russian nodded although Y/N wasn't able to see her. "I'll talk to you later, Y/N. Have fun on your date." She rushed before ending the phone call abruptly.

"O-okay, bye." Y/N said even though the call ended. Maybe blowing off Natasha for Wanda was a mistake, but they weren't a thing and if the redhead had a problem with it, she would talk to Y/N about it right?

——

"Are you okay, Y/N? You seem a little preoccupied." Wanda asked as she lifted her glass to take a drink of her wine. "It's not like you to not touch your food."

Y/N smiled. She was preoccupied, her conversation with Natasha was playing on repeat in her head. The slight devastation she heard in the Russian’s voice after telling her about Wanda, just wouldn't leave her mind.

"Sorry, I'm worried about my friend." Y/N admitted as she moved some of the food around with her fork.

Wanda hummed. "A close friend?" She asked. Y/N nodded before taking a bite of her food. "How close? If you don't mind me asking."

Y/N chuckled nervously. "Close like we sleep together sometimes. She’s actually my best friend.”

"Did you tell her you were just going out or did you tell her that you have a date?" Wanda asked.

"I told her it was a date, but I don't see why she would react that way. I even told her to come over afterwards and she said maybe." Y/N huffed.

"Y/N, she obviously has feelings for you." The older woman butted in. Y/N's face scrunched up in confusion. "You're telling me, you didn't think once about her being jealous?"

Y/N shook her head. "She's not the jealous type. At least I didn't think she was. I always talked to her about my dates and she listened. She never really had much to say but I didn't think she was jealous."

Wanda giggled lightly and shook her head. "You're cute. And very oblivious." Y/N cracked a smile and shrugged. "You should talk to her. Find out how she's feeling."

"What about this? What about us?" Y/N asked.

Wanda reached over and took one of Y/N's hands in hers. "We... are still going to be friends. As much as I like you, Y/N, I can tell that she means more to you than you think. We'll be fine, but you need to fix things with her."

Y/N smiled and squeezed Wanda’s hand. "Thank you, Wands." Wanda smiled and retracted her hand before gesturing for Y/N to finish her food.

She was thankful that Wanda understood her predicament. Losing Wanda would have taken a small toll in Y/N’s life but losing Natasha would be an even bigger one. That's why she would head straight to Natasha’s apartment after dropping Wanda off at her place.

——

"It'll be okay Natasha." Carol tried to reason with her. The blonde was currently in Natasha’s room after seeing her moping around the common room about how the woman she was in love with was probably falling in love with another woman. "You don't know if Y/N actually likes this Wanda person."

"They've been on three dates already! They've probably kissed by now knowing Y/N. She's so smooth and charming, she always gets her way with women." She explained before shoving her face in a pillow.

Carol went to rub Natasha’s back before her door opened and Sam popped his head in.

"Natasha, someone's here to see you." Sam said, catching their attention. Natasha waved her hand while she kept her head in the pillow.

"Tell them to go away. I'm busy." She groaned. Carol swatted Natasha’s butt as a warning causing the Russian to groan and sit up. "Okay fine. I'm coming." Natasha pouted as she climbed off the bed with a huff.

She left her room and padded towards the living room where she stopped short when she saw Y/N talking to Steve. Their conversation was cut short when Steve looked over Y/N's shoulder and pointed at Natasha standing in the doorway.

"I'll leave you two alone." Steve said as he patted Y/N's shoulder and left to go to the kitchen.

Natasha sat on the couch and gestured for Y/N to do the same. "So what brings you here this late? Your date didn't go well?" She asked sarcastically.

Y/N cracked a small smile. "I wanted to come and talk with you Natty." She paused, waiting for the redhead to respond, but when she didn't, Y/N continued speaking. "Wanda helped me realize something. I probably wouldn’t have caught on to it if she hadn’t said anything.”

Natasha hummed, not wanting to hear anything else coming from Y/N's mouth. "That's great. She must be amazing."

"I’m in love with you Natasha." Y/N said as she reached over to hold her hands. "I love you and I'm sorry it took me so long to realize. There is no replacing you even if I tried with everything I have in me."

"W-what?" Natasha asked. Her eyes wide at Y/N revelation. A wave of emotions washed over the redhead; relief and happiness, but most importantly love.

Y/N smiled at the woman’s reaction before leaning forward and pressing a kiss to her forehead, right between her eyes. "I’m in love with you and I want to be with you. If you’ll have me that is."

Natasha smiled and wrapped her arms around Y/N’s shoulders, pulling her in to press their foreheads together. "I love you and I want to be with you too."

Y/N wrapped her arms around Natasha and squeezed her tightly not wanting to let go. “Then let’s not wait any longer.” Y/N said after a while. She released her hold on Natasha to stand up and hold her hand out. “I believe that our favorite ice cream shop is still open. Sundaes on me for the rest of our lives.”

The redhead followed Y/N’s lead and stood up as well with her signature smirk and an eyebrow raised. “For the rest of our lives, huh?”

“Well of course… You’re it for me Natty and I’ll spend the rest of my life proving that.” Y/N responded.

Natasha smiled and cupped Y/N’s cheek. “You should kiss me now.” Y/N couldn’t stop the wide grin from spreading across her face before she leaned forward and pressed a kiss to the redhead’s lips.

A soft moan left Natasha’s throat at the feeling of finally having in a way that she craved. Her best friend was now her lover and neither one of them could be happier.

#natasha romanoff fluff #natasha romanoff x you #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff imagine #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff fanfic #natasha romanov

[anonymous-dentist]

GOD I LOVE YOUR AU ok question time

- who is in the federation of heros? What founded the federation? Are they powered like cellbit?

- how is cellbit one of the first few born? I feel theres a science experiment plot caught in this and he broke containment. I wonder if he found this out due to being able to scare himself, and that fear immediately projecting to others, making THEM just as scared. Id imagine hed be diagnosed with severe paranoia/etc and then like. Oh SHIT its not. That. Oh fuck.

- what was that leadup that made him a supervillain? Something so minuscule yet so big as fear, to be considered one of the high villains of the city is insane. Some people would probably laugh it off an say physical destruction was scarier than mental, until they see what he actually does.

- who did he murder?????? I wonder if it was someone who defied the "everyones fears projected back to them" ability. Someone unaffected by this, like maybe their own ability counteracted it. One of the federations lower ranked heros attacked... as a citizen... i feel theres more than meets the eye here..... but of course it ended with murder. I feel there could be done with something of luzu and his look alike there.

- i still keep thinking about breaking dawn and how forever is also considered richas's dad, and just thinking about it being kinda switched in this scenario. Cellbit walked into forevers life again an now richas has another dad to annoy the piss out of. Though i do feel him an jaiden would be at each others throats in investigation. She would totally be a foh member to me. He tries to take down them through HER.

- why jaiden? Shes probably the most visible with her apparent ability. I imagine her having hummingbird like abilities. Flying at such a fast rate it can change the force of wind itself, etc etc etc (running on coffee an headaches atm sorrie) but she KNOWS something. She knows the foh is fucked up. She knows its dictating the definition of right an wrong, but she doesnt have the power (YET!!!!!!) to kill them from the inside out.

- heros who are seen as the light amongst the city, vigilantes who are the underbelly of a growing problem/an antibiotic refusing to kill the infection, and singular villain who wants to put a stop to it for all. God. I am jn love with this au im sorry can u tell

- and then theres fucking SPIDER MAN. nobody knows who he may work for since, by the logic of q city, if your a vigilante, your working for someone else directly related to the foh, and being sponsored as such. But theres no calling for spiderman, theres even active "have you seen this person" signs around the city, marking them as a non verbalized threat to the standing of foh. Cellbits key.

- now he needs to convince his friends to help him find spiderman. For....... research. Yes. Totally. He wishes to interview spiderman in hopes to figure out "who he works for", which not really. Hes not the best at lying, nor was he really trying. He wants to crack down the foh to its rotten core.

- he even tries to ask roier for help at some point, right? He talks about the signs around the city, says its a shame that hes on a watch list- and how he swings around to actively web heros against the walls to stop them from hurting another person.

- and its convinent theyre on a coffee date (cellbit didnt even notice, roier did, an hes just awkwardly like... hahahahabah thats really weird why would spiderman stop him but also yeah i get that- why would thet get rid of MY hero <:((("

- cellbits subconsciously like. Shit. Pretty boy is pouting about the vigilante. More reason to find the motherfucker.

SORRY ITS SO LONG ENJOY THE RAMBLEEEE

WOW OKAY so let’s see:

1. It’s a lot like the Federation from the canon qsmp, but it’s also more overtly focused on ‘Protecting the City’ from superpowered threats. It stepped in to fill the shoes of the former police state, and by getting rid of the majority of police officers it both opened up opportunities for villains (and thus heroes and thus the Federation) and for heroes (see: previous parentheses.) The founder is anonymous, a “Mister Duck”.

2. I’m actually lowkey playing by MHA rules. Basically, at some point a couple of decades ago, kids started being born with superpowers. It was the more obvious ones that were discovered first, like a girl in France being born with little duck wings. Cellbit’s ability is less obvious, but his parents were constantly overly worried about him because babies and children are always very very scared of everything. Eventually he realized what was up when he was around nine or ten, but he didn’t really tell anybody because even back then he knew that he would “get in trouble” for it.

3. As for villainy, it was an accident. He needed money after his parents died (of sudden heart attacks, and he pretends he doesn’t know what that actually means), and he isn’t a very intimidating guy on his own, so he kinda… helped himself out a little. And it worked super well, so he kept doing it. And he kept doing it. And then he started going a bit overboard with it and the people he was robbing started dying, too.

4. And as for the murder, Cellbit and the hero were both civilians when they got into an argument. The hero, new to the whole thing, ended up using their ability and actually attacked him. He attacked back, notably without using his ability, and he accidentally killed them. The Feds were NOT happy about this, so they messed with the court proceedings and got him sent to prison for three years. But, hey, at least he got therapy there?

5 and 6. Jaiden is 100% working with the Federation in this au. She and Spider-Man are taking very different approaches to what is fundamentally the same issue here. I think her ability is more parrot-y, but she does work for them now. (It’s a very recent development.)

8-10. Spider-Man is a fan-favorite and the Federation does NOT appreciate him ruining their image!! And he knows that he isn’t well liked by them at the moment, and he doesn’t care because it’s fine if Spider-Man dies. He has a job to do, and he is going to do it.

11-end. And it’s a good thing that Cellbit is such a big Spider-Man fan! It’s something Roier thinks they can use to bond. Definitely. Bonding.

…Can you tell superhero aus are my guilty pleasure lol

#asks! #anon! #deli superhero au

[thatdesklamp]

'Intrinsic Warmth': Collector's Edition

Here is a masterpost of all 'Intrinsic Warmth'-related content: a small portion is stuff that I've written, probably in response to a question/ask, but the majority is content that I... haven't actually produced! This is so so self-indulgent because I love everything here like a firstborn son. Oh my goodness. I’ll put this on the ‘other’ section of my masterlist for reference, too.

me prattling on

The Influence of 'One Day' on 'Intrinsic Warmth', an essay-that-I-didn't-mean-to-be-an-essay about how 'One Day' by David Nicholls impacted IW (in more ways than just the shamelessly-stolen concept, lol)

music

'Intrinsic Warmth': The Musical, a compilation of all the songs people have related to 'Intrinsic Warmth' in my comments (I've added the full list below with extra comments + context for each song)

'intrinsic': The Fic Playlist, an actual IW playlist (!!!) made by ao3 user redromeow

writing

'Sunday September 7th, 2014', a true gem of a fanfiction of my own fanfiction (ohmygod); Satoru's perspective of the beginning of IW's Chapter 19, written by ao3 user late_night_secrets

'Intrinsic Warmth': The Musical: The Context and Comments = Comments you guys made when you recommended the songs :DD

Please, Please, Please Let Me Get What I Want / The Smiths

"So, for once in my life / Let me get what I want / Lord knows, it would be the first time" -- Hebi's yearning hours

Haunted / Taylor Swift

"Stood there and watched you walk away / From everything we had / But I still mean every word I said to you / He will try to take away my pain" -- just IW in its angst era

"Come on, come on, don't leave me like this / I thought I had you figured out / Something's gone terribly wrong / You're all I wanted / Come on, come on, don't leave me like this / I thought I had you figured out / Can't breathe whenever you're gone / Can't turn back now, I'm haunted" -- Chapter 15, 2010 (Gojo + Hebi on the roof)

Don't / eAeon ft. RM

Lyrics that are very Hebi and Gojo. I particularly like: "Please, don’t leave this place / There’s no place like this elsewhere in the world, after all / Please don’t break us / Then our one heart will be divided"

look at me / george

Lyrics that are Gojo being in his feels whenever he sees Hebi (in IW's angst era specifically)

You're on Your Own Kid / Taylor Swift

"I wait patiently, he’s gonna notice me / It’s okay, we’re the best of friends" -- Chapter 14, 2009 (the first year after they graduate) Hebi is yoyok coded. Lol.

Remember the time / Michael Jackson

It fits IW v v well (it does)

Something about us / daft punk

"I need you more than anything in my life / I want you more than anything in my life / I'll miss you more than anyone in my life / I love you more than anyone in my life" -- Chapter 12, 2007 (right after Geto left). It is them.

Good enough / xdinary heroes

A song that matches the tone of their relationship

La gent normal al Mercat de Sant Antoni / Manel

I couldn't find this on Spotify! I've put it the original 'Common People' on IW:TM, but here's a link to the actual song that I got recommended; it's Hebi and Gojo.

Last Kiss / Taylor Swift

Specifically in Chapter 16, 2011 (the one with the Kiss and Breakup). Yikes.

IF I HAVE MISSED ANY SONGS Y’ALL HAVE SENT PLS TELL ME, I TRIED TO BE THOROUGH BUT I MAY HAVE MISSED SOME

#intrinsic warmth

[dipplinduo]

So, I'm really looking to write a Dipplinshipping series myself and I really love the depth that you go into for S&D Dipplins (and its related spinoffs, I am very up to date).

Do you have any tips for keeping up with/writing longer works? I think my idea may take at least 10 chapters, but I've never been able to finish anything but oneshots before... I admire your consistency with the quality of your work (there has not been a single miss, not a one) and I hope to be able write like you one day.

No pressure to come up with anything if you don't know what to say. Regardless of anything, I hope this message reaches you well and that you have a fantastic day!

Omg I love writing talk asks and I'm so touched that you thought to ask me this question!

I'm gonna share stuff I found helpful to keep in mind:

- Take your time with storytelling. The advantage of having more chapters is that you can reallllyyyy enjoy your pacing. One way I do this is through gradual hints and breadcrumbs that build to the major plot points. It's a fun way to develop your story over time while keeping readers interested and theorizing. And when you're not focusing on the main plot, you can focus on other aspects of the story.

- Outlines and general note pages for your fic as a whole are your best friends. They will do the work of keeping track of different story elements for you.

- Listen to your readers. Their feedback is invaluable. If you get a lot of comments about something people seem to be enjoying, this may suggest that it's part of the voice of your fic. It can help you figure out what you'd want to emphasize more down the line - whether it be through side stories or through the main plot.

- Switch up some dynamics overtime. If you find yourself feeling stuck because you feel like you're trying to write similar kinds of moments, thoughts, or dialogues, this is a sign that it's time for you to move on and shake things up. I've done this with Kieran & Juliana in S&S D after I felt I have described Kieran seeing Juliana as a witch (who he has a hard time resisting lmao) so many times.

- Flush out the roles of supporting characters. They don't need their own character arcs, and they don't need to be focal points of the story. But they can influence some events, and it can help with the movement of your fic. (E.g. I often use Drayton to instigate moments one way or another, and this suits his character given that hes relatively chaotic neutral).

- Focus on the quality of telling your story first and foremost; you do not need the permission of certain chapter "markers" to progress. You don't need to wait for Chapter 10 or 15 or whatever to have a big moment happen. If everything is set up and ready to go, just do it. This is why a big moment of S&S D happens in Chapter 9 rather than Chapter 10; there was enough in place and I felt dragging it out would've diminished the moment. No one's really gonna care that much about how things line up to a chapter number. They're gonna be happy they got a big moment, and if anything, your ability to break this norm can keep readers on their toes.

- On the opposing ends of things, know when you have enough in a chapter to stop even if you know where you're going next. If you flushed out descriptions of someone's feelings or some scenery or whatever, and you feel you have enough? It's okay to stop writing and publish. Giving yourself more time to soak on ideas can improve the way you're going to pick up where you left off. I personally don't have a hard rule around this, but I tend to cut things off at the 15-20 page mark for a chapter of S&S D.

- If you feel like you're writing a filler chapter, think of ways it can build to your overarching story. You really don't need filler chapters if you think about it - even if you want to delay going somewhere specific. So if your work could be summed up when completed, what would you want someone to say? Think of ways you can slip in gradual storytelling from multiple angles - whether it be through plot or through some of the lighter moments (that may build to the heart of the fic like found family or dorm life or whatever). This can help breathe life into any chapter update.

- Remember that by taking your time, you're actually developing the voice of your writing and of the story. My original conception of S&S D and where it's at now are wildly different, and that's because there's no rushed time table. That goes for the storyline, the characters, the plot points - everything. LMAOOO, even the beach episode content is going to be very different because I gave myself permission to delay it until I figured out the exact roles I want Paldean Squad to play! It was a better decision that will lead to better characterization (even though I'm nonetheless very grateful for people's patience).

- Write on your timetable, not anyone else's. I occasionally put due dates on myself to get me going (e.g. by teasing a chapter update), but I never promise that I'll have chapters out on a weekly basis or whatnot for anything I write - S&S D related or not. This is deliberate. Life happens and the last thing you need is to write for the sake of writing and nothing else. I feel it's the easiest way to kill your passion if it becomes stressful for you.

- Lean into what inspires you. I find a LOT of motivation through comments, reactions, asks, fanart, etc., so I make it a point to respond to every comment on AO3 and engage continuously with the community on here and whatnot. I've also been loosely inspired by art pieces that have nothing to do with my work. This is just what works for me, though. Sometimes you might be inspired by other media, or maybe by things that you've seen or experienced in your own life. Whatever it is, draw from it.

Hmmm that's what comes to mind for now. Happy to give more later if they come up, & hope this helps! Best of luck with writing YOU GOT THISSSSS 🤗💛

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