#way earlier than i did

[kip-has-fleas]

real moment in my life 5 years ago

me at age ten: puberti my mom: chest buperty holder *gives bra* me: me: *genuine panic* what my mom: will make pubooby look big me: *refuses to wear the bra*

#shouldve known i was #transgender #way earlier than i did

[deservedgrace]

i was thinking about the sleep deprivation thing that cults do and something i completely forgot about with regards to that conversation is that the sleep needs of children/teens are different to adults. it's a range as most things are, but when it comes to sleep you HAVE to go based off the biggest number to ensure everyone gets proper sleep because you cannot function properly without proper sleep

so, if you were a teenager who went to church camps and they allowed for less than 10 hours of sleep, or if you were a kid (6-12) and they allowed for less than 12 hours of sleep, you very well may have been sleep deprived, either intentionally or unintentionally

and as a little bonus: adults tend to respond to sleep deprivation with tiredness, but kids tend to respond with hyperactivity, and even one night of sleep deprivation can affect someone

#i don't think my places were intentional cuz most people don't know the amount of sleep kids/teens need #but i am so positive that we were not getting 12 hours to sleep when we did the middle school thing (11-14) #or the thing that had high school and middle school #i cannot remember the middle school thing but the high school ones were during summer #and i remember us always getting into bed when it was pitch black And that we had to wake up way earlier than anyone wanted to #yes it's possible we stayed up past curfew but i remember playing group games in the dark #insane that they did this to us #cult tactics #religious trauma #ex christian #personal

[dexter-erotoph]

nobody knows how much it tears me apart that outside of sm3 we will most likely NEVER see how dexter normally is we wont see how he used to normally speak or look or what he liked to do for fun or his talents or his friends any of the stuff he surrounded himself with to make him as content and happy as he looked on his last day living normally before he got forced to regress after likely having to work so so hard to earn a life he was comfortable with. like i need you to understand HOW much you have to go through and how deeply frustrating and tormenting it must be to have this happen LOOK

#i have…. another thing in my drafts about him still #it’s ok though because i can just make it all up in my head. i love to think he was super like artistically gifted and drawing was like his #favourite thing to do AND the second best thing to ease his mind and urges #spooky month #dexter erotoph #im not just his apologist im his defence lawyer BECAUSE #IM WILLING TO BET 9999% OF PEOPLE WOULD BE AT THE POINT HE WAS IN SM4 SOOOO MUCH EARLIER #LIKE. U GOTTA UNDERSTAND HE WAS SPECIFICALLY USED TO HAVING HIGH TOLERANCE AND STUFF #THE AVERAGE PERSON WOULDVE LOST THEJR SHIT WAY EARLIER THAN HE DID AND THAT ON TOP OF HIS NEEDS AS WELL #SO IT WAS EVEN MORE GRUELLING FOR HIM THAN IT WOULD BE FOR THE AVERAGE PERSON BUT HE WAS STILL SO STRONG THE ENTIRE TIME

[code-dy]

Holy shit i have the capability to draw things for my favourite fanfic authors!!!

Here’s a quick sketch for that lovely author who wrote that absolutely lovely vampire thorin fanfic inspired by wwdits

#the hobbit #thorin oakenshield #bilbo baggins #bagginshield #thilbo #gandalf #i may have realized that i can draw and gift stuff to my favourite fanfic authors #but i do not have the courage to tag them here #i may cry if the see this but i saw they were having a low mood earlier p #still out of country but i got my room now and i snuck in a bit of quick sketch for them #asdfghdkkdncjksknd im sorry i get very nervous interacting directly with people #i hope they see this the same way people used to put messages in bottles and throw them at sea #in the hopes that maybe someone woould read their message at the right time and know that despite the distance someone exists and cares #whoever you are reading these tags i hope you’re having s better day than you did a few hours from now #*virtual hug* #yknow maybe gandalf gave bilbo to thorin coz he thought they both needed a big hug or smthn #my art

[moeblob]

You know, when I kept getting asked "so you didn't ever have severe pains before now?" in the hospital and I kept replying "I have a high pain tolerance" I meant it. However, there is only so much pain my tiny 4'9" body can hold... (aka I am sweating and in agony bc I'm getting told to use LESS severe pain meds so I don't rely on them too much and it is AWFUL)

#moe talks a lot #i was shaking earlier and despite the fact i sound like im gonna cry #and the fact that my mom can pick out im about to cry from pain bc im trying to take less pain meds #LIKE MY MOM IS INSTRUCTING ME TO DO #shes like well why arent you taking any pain meds #BECAUSE THERE ARE TWO AVAILABLE OPTIONS AND ON A SIX HOUR TIMER #i cant take both at once or else what happens to me if i hurt before the six hours is up #i have to manage them in a way that allows me to benefit from both and being told im doing it wrong #after being told well its your fault it got so bad because you never complained about pain before #YEAH NO JOKE? REALLY? I NEVER DID? because everyone acts like im too young to feel that kinda pain #oh youre hurting? just wait until youre older #and its currently agony to breathe again but that i guess is also my fault bc im trying to use pain meds #holy moly i just want to not get dizzy standing up cause wow dang #sure would be nice if the multiple incisions in my stomach didnt THROB every time i sneezed or coughed or cleared my throat #but since i didnt use much pain meds before because i would be mocked for being too much of a baby its like #welp damn now i could really use some and im being called out for being too reliant #anyway time to sleep more because that means im not noticing my pain #im literally smaller than most children and so i do understand my body size makes people worried about the medication intake #but can i please just go a day without being asked how much im taking or when i last took it or if im gonna cry #anyway sorry for the excessive rant today never really had surgery or anything so this is brand spankin new suffering

[pommunist]

Some tweets from Lea (ex admin) for people who don’t understand what the problem with the merch announcement is.

The french part in the first tweet can be translated something like « they were born before shame was invented » aka « they should be ashamed of themselves »

I’d like to add that we know for sure that the figures were thought of and being conceptualised for a while, so while I hope the revenue can be used to pay the admins now, there’s is a chance that would ex admins not have spoken up about the issues, the egg merch would have been released and the admins would have remained unpaid and overworked all the same.

UPDATE because idk if i expressed myself well enough : No one has an issue with Qstudios selling merch using the eggs image, it’s most likely legally their property and people have been wanting it for months. Merch itself also isn’t an issue, the problem lies in the context and timing. While legally there’s nothing wrong with it, morally I personally believe it’s not a good look to make money off the likability of a character that was made possible due to the work of someone who was mistreated and who is still unsure of their future within the company.

#qsmp discourse #anon for earlier lea articulates my point way better than i did i think lmao

[skoulsons]

man, I love the “you need to stop talking about this kid like she’s got some kind of life in front of her” to “ellie, are you okay?” to “oh, it’s we?” to “I’m just gonna get her killed, I know it. I have to leave her” to “it’s okay, baby girl. I got you” to “it wasn’t time that did it” to “I’m taking us home” pipeline

#I was talking to meg earlier but #nothing #and I genuinely mean NOTHING #will ever do to me what joel and ellie have #this trope is delicious and delivers every time #hopper and eleven #geralt and ciri #daisy and coulson #hunter and omega #silco and jinx #frank and amy #and whatever other father and daughter trope there is are all great #but something about Joel and Ellie. #being each others saving grace. #how they ground each other. #how they’d follow each other to the ends of the earth. #how they’re each others best friend. #there’s so much comfort in each other. #there’s so much. way too much love. more than they know what to do with. #how they became what they did. hating each other to be so ferociously in love with the other #PLATONICALLY!! I fear someone will accuse me some day so I have to clarify I’m not a freak #I just love their love #but there is something so incredibly different #but also so special and incredible and absolutely insane that no other father-daughter relationship has done #the last of us hbo #tlou spoilers #joel miller #ellie williams

[artcinemas]

sanjeeda shaikh....are you free friday night? 🫶🫶

#y'all heeramandi highkey sucks. #tawaif culture was romanticised but they literally removed the part where they were akin to celebrities in colonial india #they way script was it felt it would be better off if it were set in an earlier era...more so post akbar mughal era? #ALSO i tried to convince myself to digest alamzeb i cannot i am sorry but sharmin segal does not have screen presence like the others #she is lower than mid. also tajdar SUCKS #''tajdar baloch would never'' EXCEPT HE FUCKING DID THAT PREJUDICED BITCH #rip tajdar and whatever but alazmeb x tajdar was BORING #i wanted to see more of lajjo tbh and hell even what the fuck happened to saima and iqbal after heeramandi tbh... #WHY IS NO ONE SPEAKING PUNJABI IN 1940'S LAHORE 😭 #how is the shahi mahal massive when heeramandi is on a fucking galli 😭 #ANYWAYS BIBBOJAAN WAHEEDA FAREEDAN BAE 🫶 #heeramandi #desiblr #desi tag

[turtletaubwrites]

Just one more edit before I can post it, but it's too late 😭 That's alright, I'll just post smut in the morning. Y'all are filthy all day, right?

#lol #i was hoping to be done earlier #but i accidentally added way more to the chapter than i'd planned. (definitely not something I do regularly 😅) #and i will not rush edits #i'd just go insane after posting if i did that #turtletaub talks #fic writers

[bitchthefuck1]

In case anyone else has the brain worm that makes them want exact details anytime people talk numbers, in Too Much Birthday the offer to buy Kendall out says that he has 12,904,663 shares of Waystar (worth ~2bil at $156/share), so assuming he didn't sell any stock after that and also that Shiv and Roman all had an equal stake, which the show implies, that means that when they sell the company at $192/share in the finale, each of the siblings gets just under $2.5 billion, half of it in Gojo stock, not counting whatever they inherit from Logan.

#this is way higher than the combined 3 bil they say they said they'd have when they're trying to buy Pierce but the deal is #a 50/50 stock cash split so that doesn't factor in the $$$ they'd get in gojo stock plus its before ATN is valued in #i did some googling earlier out of curiosity but all of the articles/posts about their actual net worths either use old info #or guesstimate the number of shares the kids have based on other things the show tells us or are just straight up #inaccurate even to the info they had and none of them actually used the pretty significant info we get in that doc #their actual net worths are obviously a bit higher than this since we know they own property and it doesn't account for any #other investments or what they may have inherited from Logan (which also likely includes more stock) but waystar stock is #definitely the majority of what they have value wise so the only unknown that would make their net worths significantly #higher than this (when the scale is billions) is any stock they may have inherited from logan #succession #roman roy #shiv roy #kendall roy #connor roy #siobhan roy

[cerise-on-top]

How do you think Laswell met her wife? What's domestic life like for her when she gets to go home?

Have a lovely day!

Hello! A second CoD post today since I was able to write this fairly quickly! This is about how I think Laswell met her canon wife, but everyone can interpret this however they like! I hope this is enjoyable!

Laswell Meeting Her Wife and Domestic Life With Her

If we’re talking about someone inserting themselves into the CoD world, then I’d say it’d be however the person intended to meet her. However, if we’re talking about her canon wife, then I’d likely have to say through work. It’s not uncommon for someone to meet through work. Besides, I can imagine the CIA having a few women working there as well, a few more than just Laswell. So, there’s a chance another one of the women working there was also into girls. And that’s likely one of the main factors that drew Laswell to that specific woman.

Don’t get me wrong, Laswell doesn’t develop crushes easily, she doesn’t now, she didn’t back then, but it would likely be that feeling of unity, of not being alone, that would draw Laswell to her future wife. It’s not often someone would have come out back then, especially not to someone you’re not sure about, so she knows something like that is an honor. And it’s that which would make her subconsciously like that woman more than the other ones, wanting to spend more time with her, get to know her better. And in those years she’d have known her, she’d eventually fall in love with her. Laswell knows what she’s feeling, but she’d test the waters a bit at first. To anyone outside it would be obvious she likes that woman more than anyone else. Given that she gives her lots and lots of gifts to gauge her reaction, takes the time out of her day to spend with her and overall just compliments her, it’s hard to not think there’s something going on here. Laswell doesn’t realize this immediately, but she will eventually.

Afterwards I’d say it was probably her wife who asked her about that sort of behavior. And, a few days later, either of them would have probably confessed they like the other. And thus a few years of dating commence.

After a year or two, Laswell would have proposed to her. Although she sometimes did lie awake at night, thinking about what it would have been like for her future wife to propose to her instead, she was just that smitten by her. As she works for the CIA as well, Laswell knows her wife is just as capable as she is. Maybe she doesn’t know as many languages, but it doesn’t matter to her, once they go on vacation Laswell can play interpreter. And on vacations they went together. Not very often, mind you, since the both of them were stationed anywhere in the world, but they would try to see the nicer parts of the world together. Amsterdam, Kyoto, Vienna. All of that stuff. By that time, they had already long since moved in together.

So, it isn’t often the two of them get to see each other in general, but that’s why they cherish what little time they can spend together. Their love never falters, and when they’re alone behind doors it’s kind of sickeningly sweet how they treat each other. It used to be worse when they were younger, but they’ve since mellowed out a little bit. So, when Laswell is home, her domestic situation can be a bit lonely. But for the sake of this ask we’re going to say her wife is actually home this time.

She doesn’t like to cook very much, so there won’t be too many homemade meals. Her wife can only be convinced to stand behind the stove whenever Laswell eggs her on, promising her a small reward, such as going to the cinema together. Her wife never cooks alone, only with Laswell. All those other times she either eats out, grabs something that only needs to be heated up or orders food. It’s only with Laswell that she can get over her disdain of cooking.

However, other than that, the two of them will take turns doing chores. If either of them just came home from work, then the other will take care of cleaning, washing clothes, putting away stuff and so on and so forth. They usually do their tasks together. So one of them will clean the dishes while the other one cleans the kitchen. If all tasks are done for either of them, then they’ll help the other. Since they’re both aware teamwork is important, something they learned throughout their careers, they would never hesitate to do so.

Laswell’s wife is a more traditionally affectionate woman than Laswell herself. She loves to give her wife a kiss every morning and before work, make her coffee and maybe toast some bread while she’s at it as well. As she usually gets up earlier than Laswell, she usually gets those things out of the way immediately, but won’t wake her up. It’s usually the loud coffee machine that does.

Overall, the domestic situation between the two of them is very loving. They don’t see each other that often, but whenever they do, they make that short amount of time count. With a kiss and a hug from her wife here and there, Laswell never ends up touch starved either. However, the only thing that had been bothering her about her wife would be her nagging about her smoking. That’s why she’s trying to quit now, just to keep her happy. Happy wife, happy life, after all. Whenever Laswell gets to see her wife content, she’s happy as well. She’d go through all nine circles of hell just to protect her and make sure nothing would happen to her. And at some point in her career, she likely has done that already.

#cod #kate laswell #today is a very non-reader insert heavy day it seems but that's alright as well #I also got another request I'll be posting tomorrow. another one about Laswell! #people have been really loving on her as of late but I don't mind that in the slightest! she deserves it! #Laswell would be a very loving wife I'd say! not as cuddly or hug-y as other people but she loves giving gifts #receiving a lot of gifts from her is one way of telling she's into you so she's very affectionate like that #her wife is also a really sweet woman who knows how to put her foot down though #it's that sweetness and kindness that also drew Laswell in as well #they're also both about the same age even if her wife started working for the CIA a bit earlier than Laswell did #I HC that Laswell started when she was 25 so her wife likely started when she was 23 or so #Laswell has been working for the CIA for a long time now and so has her wife. but they're both very competent and know what they do #I also HC them both to be in their early/mid 50's as well so they have been dating for a while #I like to think Laswell got married in her early 30's and they got together when she was in her late 20's #lots of Laswell HC lore drop tonight it seems

[momonokopan]

5/5/2023

now that i think of it i always draw young hijikata for his birthday

#gintama #gintama fanart #銀魂 #my art tag now bish #gntm #gintama hijikata #hijikata toushirou #土方十四郎 #while im not the biggest toshi fan i love his backstory #theres a mingling sense of sadness to it thats different from gintoki’s (foil or not) #just like gintoki he cant bear to lose people he cares about but its developed earlier than gin’s #its just as fleeting but theres a current of gradual loss to it amidst the calm instead of the progressive looming threat that hangs over #gintoki’s predicament #it happens slowly and the world goes on its course uncaring and hes the one grasping at straws keeping control #also contributes to his overly serious demeanor as an adult too #the world is uncaring to him and prob thinks negatively of him in some way but he pushes on w ghosts on his back #this guy really has something going on but all it did was giving him the v-line bangs lmao #guardian spirit arc is so peak comedy in a lot of ways tbh

[chilapis]

WE’RE SO FUCKING BACK WE’RE SO FUCKING BACK WE’RE SO FUCKING BACK

#YEAHHHH BABY LET’S GO. #GUESS WHO FINISHED WAY EARLIER THAN EVERYONE ELSE + IDENTIFIED ALL THE OVERLAPS & DEFENCES APPLICABLE + DID SUCH GOOD ANALYSIS. #I WAS SO GIDDY AFTER I LEFT THAT EXAM HALL HUMMING & SKIPPING. #PEP IN MY FUCKING STEP. JOYOUS WITH WHIMSY AND WONDER #GIRLWIN? GIRLCONQUER? GIRL KILL. #what the fuck was I even humming. like yeah I was humming to Some beat but WHICH. #ANYWAY HIIIIIIIII THE FUCKING EXCITEMENT HAS NOT WORN OFF YET I JUST GOT HOME. #also met this darling girl from another campus & she asked for my insta & she looked confused at the handle so she told me hers but I can’t. #fucking find her i’m so sad ): #she was omg where are you from . im sure you did so well what’s your Instagram <3 & she was so sweet. where is sheeeeeeeeee #anyway yeah can you tell I’ll be unbearably annoying tonight. #✧.*🌹

[fear-no-mort]

Jesus fucking christ.

#ive noticed theres a ton of times at least in earlier seasons ive seen #where theyve had to cut down moments where rick is wayyyy softer with morty #like that one cut part of s2e1 where he actually said the whole be better than me thing TO morty before saving him #which im glad they did that. it’s so much better the way it turned out #it was much more of a private and selfless thing that way. he didn’t even care about morty hearing it he just cared about saving him #Immediatrly. like i dont think he’d be able to say it to his face even now #i really wanna see ALL of the cases of rick being more openly gentle with morty that were cut i need it all #odiespeak

[fluffs-n-stuffs]

More Pokémon Horizons Episode 25 spoilers under the cut!

As much as I laughed from how this played out like an unintentionally comedic moment---can I mention how much this actually does to separate Amethio from the rest of the Explorers; how he's actually honorable and respects Friede as a rival of sorts?

The rest of the Explorers tend to use underhanded tricks to get what they want (Spinel brainwashing Liko and attempting to wipe her memory, Onyx and Sango trying to overwhelm the others against direct orders whilst causing the destruction of everything else around them), but Amethio has been unique in how he's regarded as 'by the books' (by Friede) and constantly tries to be on equal footing with his opponent- even if it means putting himself at the disadvantage when he has more resources to utilize.

He could've very easily overwhelmed Friede by having both of his mons attack at once (given how Captain Pikachu hadn't arrived yet)---and yet he- doesn't. Which is just so interesting to me as he's meant to have a similar goal as the rest of the Explorers (which is to retrieve the pendant/Terapagos by any means necessary).

So in this case, was it really a matter of defeating Friede so that he could easily confront Liko afterwards,,, or,,,,, was he trying to prove himself somehow? 👀✨✨✨

#fluff binges !!! #adding my spoiler tag for the tags here as well delelelewhooooooooooooppppppppp------------------------------------------------------------ #AMETHIO MY BELOVED........................... #THERE'S SOMETHING ELSE THERE. SOMETHING ELSE HE'S TRYING TO ACHIEVE THROUGH HIS INSISTENCE ON BATTING FAIRLY #it's such an interesting detail to notice because he's actively Trying to make it fair for everyone involved #earlier in the season he Did snatch Sprigatito- though that was mainly to lure the RVTs to his location for a proper confrontation #he really didn't have any interest in taking Liko's mon for himself (and even judged Onia when she treated it as her own akjsdjkasds) #not to mention it doesn't seem like he's on good terms with the rest of the Explorers either- him butting heads with Spinel previously and- #--calling Onyx and Sango as “troublemakers” #ALSO ALSO NOTICE HOW HE DOESN'T GO FOR FRIEDE'S THROAT WHEN THEY BOTH DODGE OUT OF THE WAY WHEN THE TOWER FELL #ANDDDD AND THE WAY THEY B O T H MANAGED TO ESCAPE GALARIAN MOLTRES BACK IN THE MINES IN SPITE OF THEM BEING TOGETHER? #THERE'S.......... A MUTUAL RESPECT IN PLAY HERE....................... #LIKE HE'S SO OOGUGHGGHNGGHNG PICKING HIM UP AND RATTLING HIM WILDLY IN MY HANDS LIKE A FIDGET TOY #I WANT TO UNDERSTAND YOU MOREEEEEEE YOU'RE SO INTRIGUING AND ANGSTYYYYY WHAT ARE YOU HIDINGGGGGGGGG #ARE YOU JUST LONELY DO YOU WANT FRIENDS DO YOU WANT VALIDATION THE RTVS CAN GIVE THAT TO YOU YOU MUST OPEN YOUR HEART /J /J /LH #no but fr though I laughed harder at this moment than I probably should've #it's so funny how he just . does that so casually like “hold on let me switch” SKJDHFNSJDNFJKSND #amethio #explorer amethio #amethio pokemon #pokemon horizons #anipoke #pokeani

[afditlodap]

the dangender of phil calling dan mum in hometown showdown...

#he did the dad on earlier in it too #to me when they call each other dad in that specific way it's actually very cute #and the way phil said mum was the exact same tone etc so 👁‍🗨 👁‍🗨 #it was like a funny but the funny was more the 'can i get an icecream' than the 'mum' #anyway! i love dangender #dnp #phan #diary